#I'm stressing I AM STRESSING about posting but I had to
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Asexual Reader x TWST Characters: Part Two! Rewritten
This is a rewrite of earlier posts I once wrote on a different blog. I am revisiting this and trying to improve on what I wrote and once again doing this for myself and other asexuals who lack the content and kindness others get. Writing this for every fanfic I've read where the character breaks up with the reader for being asexual and doing better.
That said, Everything will be entirely my headcanons and you aren’t required to agree with my interpretations of the characters and story.
(Part two)
Malleus Draconia
Malleus Has only considered two things. The fact he has loved his significant other more than most things he can think of, and that being royalty means a lot of complicated matters. But of course he is more than happy to reassure his significant other that he treasures more than anything in all of the realms and any dilemmas or choices to be made or had will be made together.
Malleus will do everything in his power to be supportive and an ally. It might start with getting a Flag, but it most certainly doesn’t stop there by any means of the matter. As I had said the first time I wrote the post, please imagine he gives you a locket with a picture of the two of you. Give or take some cheesy engraving, a decoration of everlasting love of the purest form or something akin to it.
As I'm sure I've already said before, and likely to say again in the future. Malleus will always make sure that you're okay with whatever physical touch he gives you. He'll be up most respectful of any boundaries that may change at any point.
Otherwise, there isn’t a whole thing to say. Due to being a prince his relationships were always going to be complicated and something he was going to figure out the hard way. So regardless he’ll fight to make sure the two of you will be happy in your relationship, whatever that may specifically look like for the two of you.
Jade Leech
Going to double down on Jade being one of the most understanding people on this, he doesn’t need an explanation on what it means. The only questions he really has is what does that mean for you and what your comfort levels are with specific actions. Rather business casual, non stressful chat. Very clear communication will be had.
Unapologetically saying Jade Leech is also Asexual. So this honestly works out for himself. Your boundaries are respected, so are his. While he might not always be the most romantic, he does have his moments! They are thoughtful when he is and it will always be very endearing and something meaningful to the both of you.
While his gifts are usually very thoughtful and tailored specifically to your liking: it is non negotiable that you will get one mushroom terrarium as a token of goodwill, affection, and to generally remind you of him when he isn’t able to be around. It came free after listening to him info dump for about an hour about mushrooms.
Also, for the first time disagreeing with myself. Jade doesn’t usually cuddle, but like that mostly boils down to getting the right setting to get him to settle down to cuddle. Turn off his brain and eel cuddles. You will be trapped for at least an hour, longer if he can get away with it.
Riddle Rosehearts
I will not be the first nor the last person to mention just how sheltered Riddle grew up. That said, despite at first having no good idea what you're talking about he is the most willing to ask questions to make sure he understands. He certainly is going to have to look into queer history in general to make sure he doesn’t make a fool out of himself later either. So he’ll definitely be supportive of you, any other queer people he ends up interacting with. You’ll just have to bear with him through his initial confusion.
Riddle probably has a mental list of what is allowed and what isn't allowed. If he can remember all the queen's rules because they're important to him, he can certainly remember things that you like and don’t like because you are important to him. This also means he gets good at memorizing what teas you like, and what kind of gifts you enjoy the most, or what ways you prefer to spend time together.
Unbirthdays, Birthdays, other events in which it is acceptable to give gifts or generally spoil a person: riddle will always make sure that there is something that you’ll enjoy. A single gift that will make you feel thought off, some sort of food dish that is to your preferred tastes. Afterwards is probably always spent with cuddles and a cup of tea to unwind. A break well earned if you will.
I think Riddle is more of a love letter kind of person than giving you poetry, however if he does give you poetry he is very embarrassed by it, and without a doubt its cheesy. But its cute. Everything down to the punctuation is thought over at least twice before he dares to give it to you, wanting only the best for you.
Epel Felmier
“why wouldn’t I still love you? You’re still the same person I fell in love with after all. You're just a butterfly who’s found its wings” Was a banger of a line and i will leave it here to be appreciated. Also considering that I headcanon Epel to be trans, he just gets it. Be might ask for a bit of clarification, but he gets it the fastest. Most understanding.
Will go out of his way to make you feel loved and appreciated! You will get the most random reminders that he cares about you and how much he loves you. Probably little notes and gifts for you, left where you’ll get them.
There are plenty of cute date ideas: picnics, apple picking, horseback riding, I could go on really. But the idea is that he’ll always bring you something, usually a snack of some kind. If he doesn’t he’ll make you a flower crown, or maybe weave flowers into your hair if that is more your thing. Regardless, it is sweet and fun. No expectations of anything else but to be in each other's company.
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Part One | Part Two
#twisted wonderland#twst#TWST#disney twisted wonderland#disney twst#Twisted wonderland x reader#TeaoFics#Twst x reader#Asexual reader#x reader#x asexual reader#malleus draconia#Riddle rosehearts#Jade leech#epel felmier#Malleus x reader#riddle x reader#Jade x reader#epel x reader#malleus draconia x reader#riddle rosehearts x reader#jade leech x reader#epel felmier x reader
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hi i'm a grouchy old hag muttering to myself in my hut in the woods
1. not everyone finds it hurtful to find out that people are discussing their fic in private discord servers or on tiktok, actually. i for one passionately don't care that people aren't only mentioning my fic where i can see it. ofc i'm curious when one fic gets a sudden unexplained boost in kudos for a few days. am i HURT that i don't know exactly where the new readers are coming from? am i upset that the boost in hits/kudos isn't accompanied with a flurry of praise? am i sad that i can't jump into the discussion? i am not.
2. the messaging of "okay but you wouldn't post the fic if you didn't enjoy validation" makes me want to delete my ao3 immediately kasdjhfg. people post things for all sorts of reasons thank u!! my personal motivation is i'm trying to make myself feel better about making imperfect things!! the idea that by posting fic i'm inherently coming across as seeking praise makes me want to throw up. (since this discussion started, i've considered disabling comments on my fic for this reason – but i'm worried that move is so non-standard that it'll end up coming across even MORE that i want attention, so i haven't taken the plunge yet)
3. i also pretty firmly disagree with "commenting on fic builds community!" (i made this joke in a grouchy bluesky rant already so if u saw that pretend u didn't) but personally i feel the community spirit when i'm in a server discussing which weasley has the biggest dick (percy). i don't feel it when people are being nice to me in my fic's comments. i'd almost go as far as to say community CAN'T be built when one person is praising another bc there's an inherent imbalance. sure, writers can mutually read and comment on each other's fic and become friends/community co-members that way, but what if u don't write? who's in YOUR comments telling u how great u are? idk about anyone else, but when i am in a community space (like a discord server) and someone starts being nice about my fic, i feel awkward. the focus shifts from a shared enjoyment onto something inherently UNshared, because one person is the creator and the others are readers. that's not to say that these interactions shouldn't happen, but imo it's disingenuous to say that's the core of fandom community.
4. i really can't stress enough how crazy it makes writers when they're writing for praise/validation. i've had conversations with very well-known drarry writers where they've been genuinely upset that nobody is reading their fic (the fic in question had hundreds of comments). i've had conversations with people who take part in fests, only to continually sort the works by stats and feel awful that theirs isn't at the top. i've had conversations with people who have had multiple devastating life events happen to them so they're struggling to write, and the lack of New Fic Comment Validation makes them feel 10x worse. i can't help but feel like if you ARE posting for feedback (or "recognition" or however you want to package it), it's genuinely not good for your brain.
5. obviously there's nuance to all of this! it's a big topic! but notice how we're talking about it on tumblr, not in ao3 comments. it would probably be even more productive in a discord server. in a voice chat. you know – fandom community spaces like that.
6. can y'all keep the next round of discussions to like 700 words max pls lmao i have stuff to do
#pls i'm begging u#two pages of A4 maximum#peace and love to all tho ok ❤️#it really is nuanced!!!#but i'm afraid saying 'all writers feel X way' simply makes me want to throw my toys out of the pram like#'well i won't be a writer any more then!!!'#(i mean i think we all know it's an empty threat#if i had a comment for every time i vowed to quit writing fic i might have enough to finally feel good about myself 🥲)
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I'm taking a little bit of a break from art. I've had a bit of a rough week. I'm dealing with the stress of attempting to get a better job that actually pays me well and is something that I actually want to do and I just recieved news last night that a close family member is nearing the end of their life. I'm thinking that I'm going to try to come back at the beginning of December (depending on how long they hold on and if i am able to make it to the funeral since im concerned about traveling alone) but I will still try to post November's palette at the end of month but I can't make any promises beyond that.
I'm not leaving forever or anything I just don't have the energy to do the work involved with maintaining a online presence right now. I want to thank everyone who has shown support for me and my art, it means a lot to me and you guys are one of the reasons I had the confidence to apply for the new job.
Thank you so much for everything!!!
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Wow, I didn't think that post would get me even more hate to be honest 😅
First of all, I wasn't talking about ALL Carlos fans but about some "fans" (you can't call them like that, not after the really harsh words I received) who came into my asks when i asked nothing: I never was mean about Carlos, i didn't even defend Charles. I only posted 2-3 things related to this Charlos gate or whatever the fandom is calling it.
Here are some of the posts in questions:
After the first one, I received insults (anons and non anons, I don't know what is worst, that's what I was talking about them being younger and not knowing how the Schumi era and baby Shumi era were, (the non-anos were 17-18) because people misunderstood it (or understood what they wanted to understand).
After one or two more posts after the end of the race, it escalated very quickly, I received death threats! That's very serious! How can it come to this for a FUCKING sport? There are more serious things in life!
So, yeah, I was quite pissed after that.
Also, I didn't even defend Charles in my post, rereading now and I undertand I may have sound like I did but I'm French and I may have translated word by word what i wanted to say (it's a bit complicated but we sometimes use "you" to talk about people + ourserlves in some sketchy expressions). Anyway, what he said was definitely inappropriate and very "childish" in a way. Those words should had been spoken in private with his team and Carlos, not in front of million of people; and I think if FIA penalised swear words, they should start looking at those kind of statements.
Also, for those saying that I would be the kind of person to insult their favorite driver(s), you don't know me, you can even check my blog if you have nothing more interesting to do (lol), I never insulted anyone like some people do in f1blr. We can dislike or even hate a driver with our whole being, that's ok, for each their own I guess. We can't love everyone, you have the right to defend your favs, that's our choice too, but don't go and roast people when they didn't even say something wrong in the first place. (again, i hope those anons are reading it)
I never got haters before today (just one a few months ago with tennisblr but it was more a troll more than anything else) I usually don't interract a lot because I don't like conflicts but receiving multiple insults for something I can't control: I'm not Charles, I can't control what he says, I'm not a Carlos hater neither, i'm just here, blogging and reblogging stuff I love, mostly sports, sometimes with my particular sense of humor.
Nobody is perfect for sure, and I'm sorry if some of you thought I was just calling out Carlos or defending Charles. He may be one of my favourite drivers, just like other drivers can be yours: all of them are not flawless and we may continue to like them or not after different sorts of situations, that's up to us.
To finally finish my thesis (sorry if you're still reading), I didn't know that I would be so stressed on tumblr one day (call me a sensitive person) but this website is my sanctuary, I hope it will stay like that for a very long time but you can't be appreciated by the whole world, I lost some of my mutuals and i accept that. This morning's messages went too far and that's not normal to say thing like that, no matter how peacecul I am, I had to call them out. Also, on my other fandoms, you can share thought without (or almost) getting attacked verbally, that's sad that it's not the same anymore here, but yeah, football is the same.
You can choose to answer or not, I won't block anyone because I don't feel the need to, opinions can be shared but respectfully, I would be happy to talk more if some of you are up to.
So, I don't know what to add, have a great end of the season, everyone!
i don't know if everyone who reblogged or commented can see it when I reblog it so i'm tagging y'all: @midesastremanifiesto , @janesurlife , @gaypoetsblog , @katarf1a , @chaitalinath , @danieldrivesfast , @landhoe-norris , @eightsixtiism
One thing is funny about being insulted by all those Carlos "fans" (won't call them real fans tbh he deserves way better than toxic people): I was already watching F1 that they were not born, if you think that Charles was shitty today, just remember we had Michael Schumacher as the most dramatic queen ever and Sebastian Vettel was a little Gremlin at some points. REAL FANS WERE NOT FIGHTING FOR THAT!
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What actually happened to Rex's batchmates?
Here's my take on this, because atm I'm writing a fanfic about Cadet!Rex as well so I'm appealing for his fanon cadet fate.
I respect both "Rex's batchmates are all decommissioned because the whole batch is defective but Cody and the others saved him so now he's got PTSD from child ab**e" and "Rex got bullied because of his mutated blond hair" fanons (uh hey where did this begin? Had those been widely accepted headcanon that it became fanon eventually? I'm revisiting this fandom and am just stepping my foot into the fanon so maybe safe to say I'm kinda-but-not-really new) but... Hear me out.
(Future me, approx 2 hours after starting this post: okay this post turns out to be so long you might wanna sit down)
Disclaimer again; I don't hate those fanons but it's kinda bothersome to me (so cruel omg idek if he'd been really strong for, what, just 10 years haunted by child ab**e trauma, based on majority fic depiction? and said trauma lasted into the clone wars even? uh, really? more in 10) that I've pieced the puzzle myself on how one may approach this matter from another angle.
Facts i (we) know about clones
As far as we know, they have batchmates and squadmates.
Not only are they genetically engineered with accelerated physical stamina, they are also capable of withholding more stress than the average natborn. This is due to the fact that war soldiers generally suffer PTSD and the Kaminoans wanted to create Tupperware clone army. Thus, to a certain extent, genetically, clones prove to be more emotionally stable – mind you, that doesn't mean they're not immune to PTSD and other related traumas. There were clones who defected from the army just because they couldn't handle it anymore. As cruel as this might sound, yeah; there's something wrong with their programming.
There are 3 known mass-produced clone types: CT (Clone Trooper), CC (Clone Commando), and RC (Republic Commando). Each type is made? cloned? bred? separately. Obviously.
Clones are engineered to be obedient and submissive to order and structure. CT has the most extreme levels of this alteration, meanwhile CC has less, due to their supposed strategic position in command they have to adjust to every possible scenario thrown at them, eventually concocting tactically effective battle plans.
Mutations and defective traits are different. Mutations are uniquely positive and genetically induced or by experiment, while defective traits pop up due to poor maintenance or accidents. Kaminoan scientists are willing enough to tolerate mutations as long as it causes no further problems (like Blue Eyes), while they deem the ones with defective traits totally unfit for combat (like 99).
So, to stress and/or narrow them down:
Clones, regardless of type, are capable of handling more stress and adapting to situations quickly.
#GodlikeKaminoanEngineering (or so they say): Nothing wrong with programming = wouldn't suffer trauma and/or related disorders. (Idk if this hypothetically would apply irl. If there's any legit research about this particularly, point me to the journal article lol I'd love to check it out tho I'm not a huge bio fan. Intriguing all the same.)
Nothing wrong with programming = wouldn't defect. Clone Force 99 is a special case, though. (This point is completely unrelated to Rex but I think still worth mentioning)
CT's aren't that much capable of putting all hands on deck in strategy talks (that's what the CC's are for). All they know is to wait for orders from command and follow them thoroughly and make sure the job's done. However, they may or may not develop those traits themselves and finally take initiative basically becoming a kriffin badass CC intern, like Rex.
Genetic mutations, as we know or may assume, consist of change in physical appearance. This could mean lighter skin tone, not-Jango-Fett eye color, or not-so-Jango-Fett hair color. This is due to recessive genes. Jango's sister Arla has natural blond hair, you guys.
Therefore, from my perspective, Rex is in possession of genetic mutations and definitely not defective traits.
Combined with his standard CT emotional intelligence, excellent combat skill, his (pre-Skywalker) undying love for order and structure, and if not little acts of valor that undeniably has to show during his cadet years (I mean it would carry on into his ARC training and first months of the Clone Wars that he's given jaig eyes), I see no reason why he would be bullied and shunned by the rest of his batch.
If any, they regard him with so much respect because he shines – gloriously – throughout his training and essentially be the local pride. He's their brother, after all! Their vod! That's how he would've caught Cody and the other's attention too.
☝🏼🤓 I do accept the fanon that he's a batch behind them. I can't think of a reason. Might as well be freeform. And it's cute.
So.
That's the baseline, for clones.
Now we move on to the man himself.
(on gif above) That is so Cody-coded, Rex.
(1) Decommissioned batchmates
Tbh not sure what being decommissioned means, but given the generally grim and threatening implication that it strikes enough terror and neck-breaking amount of trauma to Rex of this fanon, it's gotta mean being terminated(?). Correct me if I'm wrong, but for now I'm rolling with that.
Rex exhibits excellent capabilities on field during his training that it easily captures his trainer's attention. A transfer to the CC command training sounds possible, I think, since y'know, Ponds is a CT as well and I'd like to think he's above Rex that the rank Commander is permissible for him (yes yes Rex is given the Commander promotion but he turned it down because he favors fighting up in the front with his men I am a firm believer of this as well). So he just gets separated from his batchmates and situated himself in the new brotherhood.
Also here's my baseless debunking because I just don't know any of those biology-related stuff.
I just don't think every single of his batchmates are so defective that the Kaminoans pulled the genoc**e card. It's just... Not possible. Math and probability, anyone? Hello?
Assuming the only reason for being decommissioned is for possessing defective traits so bad that it's worse than 99, the Kaminoans have no excuse to pull the genoc**e card just because a clone gets blond hair instead of Jango's black hair. As much as I support them being the most ultimate of assholes, I don't think they'd waste resources just like that.
So, in conclusion of this one; I think not. Rex's batchmates are very much alive and well and kicking droid ass during campaigns :)
(2) Traumatized Rex
Fanon: Rex with child ab**e trauma and, in conjunction, PTSD because he witnessed his batchmates get decommissioned.
I shall assume he carries this trauma even to the Clone Wars period.
Oh hang on, okay, he's defective because he's traumatized? Or is it the other way around; he gets traumatized that it somehow affects his already-defected emotional intelligence? What about his coping mechanism, is it defected as well? If the decommissioning of his brothers affects him so much he couldn't cope and carries with him the trauma, I don't think he'd be fit to go further since the start, or even earn those jaig eyes.
One thing about Rex is that he's brave. Since we're working with existing materials to create this headcanon, and that the jaig eyes itself is important, the jaig eyes still gotta be there. He earns it because he commits acts of valor in the battlefield – because he is a man of honor. Rex is very much aware of his emotional state, aware of the proper time and place; when to break down and when to put on a strong façade, because he's that selfless. He puts his men first. He cares about his men. He regards every single troop as his brother. First in, last out. An inspirational figure with strong will, always trying his best being the prime example and morale to his men.
Aside from the genetic stress inhibitor traits, Rex is a strong man, physically and mentally. In line with my previous point about how implausible and improbable it is that every single of his batchmates gets decommissioned, with this fanon scenario, I don't think Rex would be some guy who easily succumbs to trauma. He'd push on through and survive, and lo and behold. Canon-wise, he does. Still does.
(3) Why is he bullied 😭
My poor little meow meow of a heart can't take it. I don't know what this version of Rex is supposed to be bullied for? But if it's because of his blond hair IT'S NOT DEFECTIVE TRAIT it's genetic mutation. Even the majority of the clones sport black hair and brown eyes Jango style and only some of them sport brown hair or lighter, and even fewer of blond hair. And the Kaminoans allow it, as seen in 302.
Look at him he's precious. Some may think he's overrated, but he's just being him. No wonder he's majority's favorite. So with all that said, I rest my case.
Sorry that took so long and much of your time, but for my part, I'm glad I got those out of me. I might write my Rex and the other's headcanon in the future. Mentioned I'm writing a Cadet!Rex fic, so there's the link, if you're interested.
And don't get me started with the natural vs dyed blond thing. I'm a firm believer that Rex is a natural blond, and I've written the reason somewhere above.
Thank you for coming to my TED talk. You may use this headcanon in your adaptations if you'd like. Cheers!
#captain rex#captain rex headcanon#ct 7567#star wars#star wars the clone wars#clone wars#yes i actually wrote this instead doing my homework#how irresponsible of me#*puts candles* i am manifesting fox's infinite energy#this is a character study#i try make it to be
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Ultra Magnus seems to be just a little off all shift. When Rodimus and Megatron try to ask him about it, he completely blows over it, insisting he's fine even though he sounds strained and feels warm just standing next to. Rodimus takes it in stride, recognizing Magnus was in some kind of mood and clearly didn't want to be pushed, but Megatron took it more personally. Ever since the two hooked up one night, Minimus seemed to be making himself smaller around Megatron. He wasn't exactly ignoring him, but he just seemed so reserved compared to the mech who was working so hard at coming out of his shell.
Megatron tried to talk about it with Minimus, but the conversations died out when Minimus would start to look stressed. Megatron never knew what he was saying to push Minimus away, but clearly he was doing something wrong. When one day he came to the deck and saw Ultra Magnus with Rodimus instead of Minimus, he felt even worse, like he truly ruined something with Minimus. The minibot hadn't shown his true self in so many cycles, seemingly reverting back to wearing the Magnus armor full time, which made something in Megatron's spark hurt deeply.
The shift was quiet, or about as quiet as any activity with Rodimus could be, and felt tense. Magnus was fidgety and his venting sounded terribly harsh, and Megatron couldn't push him anymore without making things worse. It was a horribly uncomfortable several hours, when out of nowhere, Ultra Magnus made a choked noise. He immediately excused himself from duty and sped off down the hall, surprising everyone there to see him go. Magnus never used his shift breaks, what was so bad it made him leave his post?
Megatron had to know. He left Rodimus in charge despite the co-captain demanding to go with him, but someone had to stay on deck while the other captain and second in command were occupied. Megatron took off after Magnus, noticing with worry that the commander really had left fast. He had already lost sight of Magnus and was hitting dead ends while he tore through the halls like a mad mech. He was running towards the med bay in his search and finally saw Ultra Magnus. He tried to grab the commander, and nearly jumped when his arm clattered onto the ground when Megatron held it. This was going to make it even harder if Minimus had left the armor, there had to be something awful happening for him to just leave the suit standing around like scrap metal.
Megatron collected his thoughts, Minimus had to be nearby. He was snapped back to reality when he heard a quiet cry from a supply closet just further down the hallway. Megatron ripped the door open, disregarding the damages. He could hardly take a step into the cramped room, but he didn't need to get any closer. He looked down, and saw the mech he was looking for.
Minimus was laid on the floor, looking up at Megatron with real fear in his optics. It made Megatron's spark ache, but he couldn't focus on the hurt at that moment when there was something more important. It was hard to see at first in the dark room, but it was now clear Minimus was cradling a tiny sparkling in his arms. The little thing was held to his pouches, but it was fussing about so badly. It made a static laced cry, just like he heard earlier, and it was already enough to make Megatron's sire protocols come alive. He got to his knees to be closer to Minimus' level and looked closer at the sparkling. It was a deep green with shining silver accents, and unmistakably, the bitty had helm panels just like Megatron did under his helmet.
"I'm so sorry," Minimus said quickly, holding his little one closer as he tried to sit up. He winced at the motion, making Megatron reach out to hold the minibot down gently. "I-I didn't know how to tell you, I am so sorry captain."
Megatron felt so lost, his world had just changed in seconds. He needed more answers than Minimus was giving. "Tell me what Minimus? Because it seems there's many things I should know about here that I don't."
It took some time and some tears for Minimus to get the whole truth out. The two had been trying to court each other for some time before their spontaneous hook up when spirits were high after a harsh battle deep in space. The day after they interfaced is when things started going south. Minimus felt ashamed, not because of anything Megatron did, but for throwing himself at the big mech like overeager shareware. Their courting was going slow, and Minimus was happy with taking his time to get closer to Megatron until his array got the better of him. He shied away from Megatron after that, not wanting to see what he was sure to be disappointment in his optics when he looked at Minimus. He feared he rushed and spoiled what they were building together, so it seemed the only option for him was to build back more distance. Then later on during his annual medical exam he found out he was sparked.
He knew it was Megatron's from their night together, and he was completely humiliated. Not only did he wreck the relationship he had been chasing, but now he was carrying for a mech who probably didn't want him anymore after making such a fool of himself. The responsible thing would have been to snuff the spark out, but Minimus couldn't bring himself to do it. He felt selfish and terrible, but he just couldn't get rid of his sparkling. He could only pray to primus that the bitty took after him and he could avoid the conversation of who the sire was, but that was hardly a plan. Minimus was fighting with himself every day, and it was only worsened when Megatron would try to ask him why he seemed so distracted. He should have told him about the sparkling, but he could never get the nerve to do it. He couldn't tell Megatron and make him stay out of pity, and his poor spark couldn't handle the idea of Megatron making him get rid of the growing spark that circled his own.
Before he knew it, Minimus' frame was showing when the sparkling dropped, and he knew everything would come out when someone asked him about it. That's when Ultra Magnus had become his regular frame again, making Minimus feel even worse about himself. He resented the armor, he was so ashamed, and he was mad at himself for getting into the mess in the first place, but he was never upset with his bitty, the sweet thing was innocent in Minimus' horrible web of lies.
All of that led to the current moment, where Minimus didn't make it to the medbay and had to deliver his sparkling in a closet to hide from anyone. Megatron felt so many mixed emotions, he was so wildly frustrated and upset Minimus hid everything the way he did. It made Megatron feel guilty that he made Minimus feel pressured enough to hide it in the first place, when he should have communicated clearly after that night. The two were definitely going to need to schedule an appointment with Rung, but that was a far off plan in Megatron's processor when his offspring was crying right in front of him. He reached for the sparkling, brushing one of the tall panels on the bitty's helm. They looked at their sire with big red eyes and felt their spark call to Megatron. He took the little one from Minimus and held them like they were the most precious thing in the galaxy. Minimus was backed up against the wall, watching the two interact. His field was a difficult read, a sour mix of sadness, love, joy, and worry. He already loved his creation with his whole spark, he was just so sorry he was already doing so wrong by them.
Megatron shifted how he held his sparkling and reached for Minimus. He held the minibot's servo and met his eyes, not looking disgusted with him or disappointed like Minimus feared. "I promise you Minimus, no matter if you still want me anymore as a partner, I will always be here for you and our treasure."
It was the first smile Megatron had drawn from Minimus in so long, it made him feel light again. Minimus shifted to lean on Megatron for support, watching their sparkling finally settle down and relax once they had their sire. "If you could ever forgive me for my deception, than of course I want you Megatron."
The tension that had been so thick between the two of them since the ordeal started vanished so quickly. Minimus took back his dear little spark, allowing Megatron to pick the two of them up much easier. The first course of action was actually going to the medbay. Minimus may have had an easy delivery but Megatron refused to let him go on without an exam, not even mentioning their little one needed to be looked over. At the medbay while the sparkling was being cared for, the two could talk further about their real feelings and plans for the future, for their relationship and for their family. At least conjunxing could go on smoothly when the time was right, Minimus had already given Megatron the greatest gift he could have asked for without even knowing.
Whoever you are, thank you for sharing this wonderful story & fic!
Oh my gosh i love it!!!
#transformers#minimegs#ultra magnus#sparklings#mechpreg#megatron#minimus ambus#minimus#megatron x minimus#megatron x minimus ambus
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When you're Bakugou Katsuki, in @ofmermaidstories's surrender (whenever you're ready), and you have to do this dumbass photoshoot with your old class and Round Face (in your 20,000¥ aerodynamic pants), but you don't know Weeds is going to buy this magazine and sit on a train thinking about how your world is by appointment only 😔
#bnha fanart#fanfic fanart#Bakugou Katsuki fanart#bakugou fanart#literally okay okay okay okay#I'm so horribly bad at revealing myself and coming off anon#I'm stressing I AM STRESSING about posting but I had to#I HAD TO#This fic was EVERYTHING TO ME#ROMAN EMPIREEEEE#Also I'm doing Izuku Art too 😔#I'm so sorry I have zero impulse control#I am OBSESSED with his poor fashion taste#myart#keysart#Also I did end up giving BK more scars I think#im also refusing to think about whats happening today#:)#im fine#my baby is fine
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Data in Gold <3
Expand for higher qualityy
#everyone is obsessed with his profile and so am i#i should have made his lips golden too#you'll have to imagine it#it was so hard to take pics of glittery watercolour ;-;#i hope its ok#i actually had most of this sketch done since last week but i'm unstable and stressed so i forgot to post it :D#anyway i love data and i cant stop thinking about him#and data does not look like mark zuckerberg#those people need to be stopped fr lol#i dont want to hear it#brent spiner#data soong#star trek tng#thinking about drawing lore too...
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i fucking love prereading. getting documents about what's going to be discussed in a meeting and reading them and then going to the meeting and having context for all the things that are happening. if i could do this in all areas of life i would. send me a list of the words i'm going to need the definition of in order to understand what you will be talking about. give me a rundown of what topics might come up during this social encounter. provide detailed documentation of what to expect in a new setting. i will read the fuck out of that shit.
#me getting off meeting 2 for a project but this time i read their paper first because they sent it in advance: waaowoaoaowaw#you are not just saying words next to each other. these words have meaning#my posts#i went to get new glasses the other day but it was a failure because i forgot everything. forgot my prescription most notably#(idk where my brain is lately but it does not appear to be inside my skull)#but actually i ended up feeling fine about it. because it allowed me to scope out the place. figure out how it works#a little dry run. a little dress rehearsal. now i know that when i do it for real i'm going to go to the third floor#i'm going to go up to the ticket machine and press the button on the touchscreen and get a number#i'm going to go right inside and start looking at frames instead of sitting in the waiting area which is actually for a different departmen#i didn't know any of that and it was stressful but now i know and next time i am going to look and act so normal#also i was able to find out what my actual benefit is and it's really stupid. it's something i wouldn't have guessed in a million years#so it's good i had the opportunity to ask about it during a time when it didn't matter because i couldn't use it anyway#getting glasses is stressful enough because you have to stand around trying on frames like a tool#if there is any other aspect of the process that also makes me feel like an idiot it's just too much to bear. this time i got to spread it#out over two encounters. so hopefully next time the only embarrassing part will be the frames fashion show
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honestly it's been really healing being back to actively contributing things and writing out thoughts on tumblr the last week or so, because while twitter tends to be easier for me to write out Thoughts on without getting overwhelmed, the environment in the twitter fandom circles i'm interested in is not only infested with antis but cliqueish in a way that is caustic to the fucking soul if you try to express a thought that's more than three sentences long--a hundred times over if you're autistic in slightly the wrong way--and it's incredibly reassuring to come back to an environment where the very kindest and most inclusive people toward you are not clearly thinking the r-slur the entire time they interact with you lmao
#whosebaby talks#took an incident of just open petty cruelty the other day for me to finally go#you know what all of this is doing a huge number on my self-esteem and scrupulosity and social anxiety and mental health overall#sometimes it pays to hold out and give the benefit of the doubt#when your knee-jerk reaction is to think something Must Be a Sign of Shitty Intent; bc often it will turn out that wasn't the case at all#but unfortunately sometimes it turns out people are in fact just being shitty in exactly the way you thought they were#and at the *very* best you are incompatible in such a way that if they don't have bad intentions you're just never going to be able to tell#or well. not even necessarily bad *intentions*; just shitty behavior that's harmful to you regardless of whether they mean well#sometimes you just gotta accept that even if neither of you *is* being shitty it's not worth your peace of mind to never be able to confirm#and it's better to just save both of you the stress and not try to pursue that.#it fuckin sucks when it's people you think are cool and really want to get to know; it's a hard lesson to learn; but it's the way sometimes#......and then sometimes the confirmation you finally get is that yeah okay this is some bullshit#and not in a way that can likely be communicated past; no matter how much effort you make to be kind; clear; and mature#and being publicly humiliated for carefully trying to yes-and some clarification on meta of mine#which was being used in ways i was deeply uncomfortable with; and had had no warning would take the turn that it did#and which was contributing to the original post gaining traction in the first place#all targeted in ways pretty much tailor-made to hurt someone with specific issues they had seen me talk about + acknowledged#was just. yeah i think i'm done here lmao#i am Not someone who takes down meta once posted#so the fact that it was bad enough to make me delete an entire thread really says something lol#anyway. lots of other context there; and i appreciate that in some ways the person was genuinely trying to be kind; but i'm. yeah.#that shit Hurted Extremely; and made me realize that while i'm not the *most* well-socialized or articulate or approachable#there is just something in the water over there and no amount of The Problem Not Being Me would have mattered#and the nice asks/replies/comments i've gotten both recently and during hibernation make me feel warm inside; thank y'all <3#the salt files#bullying cw#ableism cw
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Due to the nature of his work, Copperhead isn't active every night. He may spend a week hunting somebody down before delivering the coup de grâce, leaving him with a little free time before picking up his next contract. Copperhead often spends his free time caring for the various snakes and other reptile species that come into his care; sometimes these are animals belonging to former victims but often they are creatures which have been neglected or improperly cared for in some way, the serpent metahuman carefully nursing them back to health before making sure they end up in good hands.
#🐍 || musings#🐍 || headcanons#Sorry for the random headcanon post asdfghjkl just fed the new baby and I am emotional about it😭#Had him for about 2 weeks now and have been petrified I'm ill-treating him or doing something wrong#He's had his second meal and took it very nicely <3#So I can finally relax and focus on today's asks!#I had to move him from his horrible 4lt RUB to Ror's old faunarium as you know#But I kept hearing conflicting information that it'll be a big change which'll stress him#The trouble with RUB's is that they are so hard to thermoregulate#Sweet baby HATED the excessive heat but the faunarium offers a much better gradient#He's pooped and eaten and all is looking healthy so I can look into getting his next upgrade :')#I'm sorry for the random snake rambling you guys have no idea how relieved I am rn asgsff#He's such a sweetheart and I'm terrified of doing anything to hurt or upset him the sweet little puppy-faced guy <3#But YEAH Copperhead is knowledgable af when it comes to reptiles and their care cuz he's kind of one himself#Stuff like improper humidity and care upsets him#He'd absolutely keep babies in his poncho to make them feel safe
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man... i won't be able to finish my Big Pride Art this month :(((
#in this moment...#i'm actually sad about it ngl dkghjkgd#i still have a few days but... like...#gonna get tmi and venty rq! (tmi as in 'doesn't need to be public info' not the like... usual way tmi is used)#we had our car repossessed and it's taaaaanked my mental and physical health over the stress#we're getting it back!!! its been paid for!!! and it's going to be fine#but the adjustment has been. hard. and i'm handling things not super well despite how everyone's thinking i am#(like i'm doing so good i've grown so much i've helped my family so much!! yippee!!! but behind the scenes i'm having like#daily panic attacks and breakdowns teehee dkgjhdfgdjgd)#anyways if i post the art like... next month (if i finish it) then it'll be less gay :( but it will still be done ig...
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forgive any incomprehensibility but the notion that the world can be cleanly split between the two immutable categories of 'the neurotypical' and 'the neurodiverse' ignores the reality that any person can at any point for any reason be arbitrarily 'diagnosed' by a 'professional' and shuttled between categories with no regard for the notions of 'accurate traits' or 'specific symptoms'. nice dichotomy what lies outside of it? you understand me?
#N posts stuff#i'm reading some old issues of 'Phoenix Rising' and a line in one of the articles really caught me#''we are questioning the very foundation of psychiatry which uses mental illness; which is often just behavior that is judged strange#by some usually conventional middle-class-standard of morality''#also thinking about that post i reblogged yesterday claiming that 'posture sway' is a Symptom of adhd like.#Embracing the pathologizing of average behaviors VS the like. weaponizing of diagnoses against 'undesirables'#idk am i making sense? lol#like people talk about this re: disability - the notion that anyone can become disabled at any time but that's usually in the context#of like. 'anyone is one bad accident away from being disabled' but Neurodiversity in particular does not even require that much#another Phoenix Rising tells the story of a woman who like. got a little sick at work and diagnosed as 'stress' and prescribed a#heavy tranquilizer that caused side effects no one had told her about; she got confused at her appointment and her subsequent#panic got her involuntarily committed as psychotic where they upped the medications and gave her ECT until the combo#caused so much brain damage that she seized and died. bc she threw up at work one day. the categories are not immutable and#the people who define them have agendas. who benefits from buying into this dichotomy? you understand what i'm saying?#anti psychiatry
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.
#just saw a post that was like 'if you have religious or moral objections that stop you from providing certain types of medical care maybe#you shouldn't work in healthcare' (paraphrased) and...#what a way to look at the world tbh#like. they're talking about me i think - i am a conscientious objector when it comes to euthanasia#(which granted has come up exactly twice and both cases in a theoretical capacity only this is not a frequent request to me)#and... i am also a good doctor#last week i told someone that her weight doesn't matter to her health with receipts to prove it and she cried#no one had ever told her that before#and that was something that came from me specifically. that was something i would not trust all of the GPs in my practice - a practice of#excellent and compassionate GPs! - to say#i am verifiably doing good in my job that is coming from specifically who i am as a person#i cannot put that down when it comes to issues i care deeply about#fundamentally the fact that i cannot put it down is what makes me a good doctor#i think that's what i'm trying to get at#the reason that i do well by my patients is that i practice out of my values and my ethics#if i did not stand on that core i would not stand at all#so you can't have it both ways. you can't have engaged and active and compassionate healthcare providers without sometimes those engaged an#active providers having things they do not feel comfortable doing#and it is to everyone's service if they are up front about it and do not try to hide (i am suspicious of people who try to hide this)#i am literally figuring this all out as i type hence the v long tag ramble and also being nowhere near the post that started this train#(honestly in med school we talked so much about ethics as like. abortion! euthanasia! trans rights! and the ethics in practice is the littl#things. do you apologise when you mess up. how do you manage a consult with your patient with paranoid dementia and her child in the same#room at one time - or one by one bc that's fraught too. (that one's on top i had one of those today.) how do you act with grace when#you're a bit stressed and your patient is a bit stressed and the nurse wants to add five more things to your book. the day to day ethics is#SUCH a bigger thing when you come to actual practice.)#this is obviously entirely about me and leans on the fact that i largely do think i am doing a good job i am really feeling my own way#to a Thought. but i think to a certain extent it is generalisable
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..
#sorry sorry I just woke up and im having yesterday-was-weird thought again#and they are going here so i don't have to talk to the person that they're um about yet#basically im glad that im in a good enough space now that um#someone ive ive had text-based sex with and uhhh sent an ill-advised video to in like oct when i was Feeling Bad™ and doing. hm. too much.#like 6 months post text-based sex/ill adised video now aha and we've not spoke at all since like january and that was 'how was hols'#they asked to meet up 'not for sex just as friends' or i forget exact wording but basically that#no-pressure museum not-a-date#and i said I'd think about it. because i am as everyone knows a fucking idiot.#basically im glad that im in a better place now than the last time someone like expressed an interest in me as a person#because while this did give me a day long wobble i didn't have a full weekend long actual panic about it#tho they are two v different situs#an ace poly friend asking to go out with me vs someone i uh virtually fucked aha um asking to meet up for (mostly) being-friends purposes#same several-hours-later 'oh god no what have i done bad bad bad no thank you actually no sorry i cant sorry' but less intense this time#but at least i only said ill think about it?#and not actually immediately said yes because it's nice to feel wanted#and then gone Maximum Regret™ because actually all of this is way too much i don't like it i don't want it thank you but im sorry no#weird. i guess i don't have such a high baseline stress level any more? since i'm not at uni n stuff#and someone over messages going no pressure you want to be irl friends (maybe fwb no pressure)? is um#is different. to someone irl going you want to go out acely? yeah? awesome lets hold hands here is the discord with a whole buncha people#i guess#but i am being equally aro-not-super-ace Autism™ about it aha#and i am. eventually. going to be like. thought about it and no sorry. eventually.#if they ask again#i am kinda hoping they'll leave it there and forget they asked so i don't have to navigate social stuff#im much better at navigating canals everybody leave me alone please thank you#(everybody over there leave me alone. y'know. you guys are fine.)
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brother was talking to me about how if you almost die from an extreme-temperature-related incident then your body is just forever fucked towards that temperature and that's why i think kiryu and saejima are weak to ice. i dont know why aoki isn't like that too but ignore that statistic everything else tracks.
#snap chats#i already made this post highkey but im making it again cause i didnt know this was an actual real thing ☠️#my brother learned this when he started to work for target. because apparently that's a thing they tell you frame one#'snap how did this topic even come up' i am LITERALLY so glad you asked :) the cold has almost claimed me twice#am i exaggerating Maybe but its my fucked up body temperature now listen#when i was younger i got locked out of my house for like. three hours since i was a latchkey kid#and my dad wasn't supposed to come home with my siblings (from their after school events) for Three Hours#and it had snowed outside and Was Cold Yeah and i couldn't get in cause i forgot my key like a weiner#and yeah. was really cold :) my dad was real cross with me when he found me shivering in the shed LOL#he made me hot cocoa tho so its ok. second incident's just funny No I Talk About It Evvery Other Week#and im p sure i talked bout the first incident too but yeah that time after the con when i was at my sister's#like i cannot stress how cold it was because It Was Late November and the cold still existed#and my sister's heater just. Didnt Work but yeah. i wont go into detail cause i share this story every five seconds#POINT IS i've always had a hard time with the cold- like i'm cold nearly all the time even if the room is 90 degrees#i wont be COLD cold but i'll be colder than i like#anyways can't believe i'm weak to ice this is so sad. i love winter..#aoki isn't weak to ice cause uhhhh /aoki/ didnt almost die in the cold 🥴 masato did 🥴#imagine changing your identity so well that you just remove your past elemental weakness. fucked up.#alright bye
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