#I'm so down bad I hate League man

[hime-bee]

Day: ??? And I'm still thinking about a gentle dom Yone and playful Switch Ezreal with Reader...

[pomefioredove]

Hiya! Do you think you could write something romantic and fluffy with Vil? I love him!

hi anon of course! I am so unwell about this man

summary: being friends with vil schoenheit has its perks type of post: fic characters: vil additional info: romantic, reader is gender neutral, reader is not specified to be yuu, FLUFFY, mentions of food, friends to lovers huhuhu, maybe a tiny bit suggestive but also not really? lap-sitting and kissing

Someone should write a guide on how to be friends with Vil Schoenheit.

It did not come as naturally to you as you would have hoped. There were times when he felt like a star in your presence, not the actor kind, but the heavenly body.

Bright, and burning, and millions of miles away. Even as he sat directly across from you.

"You're not eating," he remarks. The comment is not degrading, though it is tinged with curiosity. "Is it bad?"

You haven't even sampled the meal yet- something fancy and expensive that you likely couldn't pronounce. He'd ordered it for you.

"It's okay," you lie.

He either buys your excuse, or ignores it. Either way, he reaches across the gossamer table cloth and switches your plates without asking.

Vil Schoenheit Friendship Survival Manual, rule number one: always assume his judgment is correct, until proven otherwise.

You look down at the plate- some kind of vegetable dish. He urges you on with a nod, lilac eyes fixed firmly on your pleasantly surprised reaction when you take a bite.

Rule number two: his judgment is always correct.

"Better?" he asks, not bothering to finish your food. He'll likely get something else later. "You really shouldn't skip meals. If you were feeling unwell, you should have said so. I would've ordered something lighter for you."

"Sorry. Didn't think of it," you say, taking another bite of his meal, if only to appease him.

You're hesitant to mention that the heavy feeling in your chest wasn't from illness, and so you say nothing more.

"No need to apologize. Here,"

Vil delicately reaches across the table and dabs at the corner of your mouth with his napkin. You hate how light-headed such a simple action makes you feel.

"Better. And don't worry about smudging anything, I have a few new products I'd like to try out on you later,"

Rule number three: always accept his gifts.

"Thanks," you murmur.

You were starting to feel as if you really were ill, the way your entire body warmed in his presence. Vil brought out a feverish sort of stupidity in you that made outings like this a minefield to navigate.

How painfully cliché, you thought. Hopelessly in love with someone far out of your league, with infinite options, none of which you could even hope to catch up to...

It made these evenings together pure torture.

You felt guilty for wishing he wasn't such an amazing friend. Must he insist on showering you in gifts and holding your hand every time you cross the street?

But being in his bedroom is another, dirtier realm of guilt. Vil saw you as a friend. Platonic. Someone he confided in, who he took under his wing. You were allowed to see parts of him no one else had, and yet, you can hardly pay attention to what he's saying because you can't stop thinking about the way his lips look when he speaks.

"Did you understand any of that?" he asks, bending down to your level as you sit on his bed. On his bed. And you had the mind to be thinking about doing romantic things...

Rule number four: speak when spoken to.

"No, sorry, I've just had a lot on my mind lately,"

Vil clicks his tongue and holds a hand to your forehead, feeling for temperature. "And you're sure you're not ill?"

"I'm fine! Just distracted,"

He chuckles, walking across the room to peruse his vanity. "Hm... and what sort of thoughts have got you scatterbrained today?"

You can feel your skin burning again. He could tell, couldn't he? All these weeks of coming undone every time he so much as looks your way couldn't have gone over his head... could they?

Or perhaps he was just used to people staring at him, stumbling over their words every time he spoke. Perhaps you were just another foolish fan who'd gotten to know him before falling in love.

You couldn't help but wish that there was someone or something that would just tell you what to do.

Rule number five: do not fall in love with him.

Vil sits beside you, a small, wooden box in hand.

"I'm supposed to promote these next weekend, but I'm not sure about them, yet," he says, opening the lid to reveal a plethora of lipsticks that likely cost more than your existence. "I'll need your opinion, of course."

"Right," you murmur.

"And I'd like to try them on you, as well,"

"Of course,"

"And you're alright with that?"

You nod. Ever the gentleman, always asking for permission. He's been quite generous with his products lately, giving them away to you like candy. You're almost certain he has a full list of your allergens somewhere.

Vil returns to the vanity, delicately prepping, and then applying the first shade. It's a marvelous, metallic pink, with dark red undertones that make it a regal color. It suits him, and you say as much.

"Oh, you think so? I suppose it does compliment my eyes, although I'd definitely need to pair it with something darker, else it become too overpowering..."

He clicks his tongue, and then turns to look over his shoulder at you.

"Your turn. Come sit,"

There isn't another chair at the vanity, and you take that as your cue to awkwardly stand in front of him until he tells you what to do. He chuckles, amused by some thought of his that he doesn't share aloud.

"What are you standing there for? Sit,"

You awkwardly look around the space, eyes searching for a mysteriously hidden stool, something that should have been obvious...

He smiles. "Oh, don't be shy. We've known each other long enough by now, haven't we?"

You can't think of the right thing to ask, although your thoughts are quickly cut off by the sight of him gently patting his lap.

Sevens. If there were any time to wake up, this was it.

Rule number five: do not fall in love with him.

He's not joking, of course. Vil hardly jokes. And so, you awkwardly straddle his lap, facing towards him, and allow him to get a good look at your visage.

He holds your chin firmly, studying your features as if he hasn't already seen them a thousand times before.

"Stay still,"

He's going to give you a heart attack, and there's a little quirk in his smile that tells you he knows it, too.

You wonder what your tag at the morgue will say. Death by Vil Schoenheit?

He starts with your skin, commenting on how soft it's gotten since he met you, then your eyes...

...Once he's satisfied, as he always is with his work, he turns your head so you can admire the makeup look in the mirror behind you.

"Stunning," he comments. "But you're missing something."

You look back, eyes wide. Surely, he hadn't forgotten something...? That's simply not in his nature.

He smiles at your confusion. "Remember? You promised to test these for me?"

Right. The lipstick. You nod. "Yes, but, I thought you'd already..."

"Oh, I do like the color. I'm just worried about this brand," Vil says. He looks away for a moment, almost as if to summon his courage... what a strange expression on him.

"What's wrong with the brand?"

He turns back with a small smirk. "They have a nasty reputation for smudging easily. I wouldn't want to make a fool of myself next weekend, hm?"

His cups your chin again, bringing you closer.

Rule number five: do not fall in love with him!

He tilts his head to the side. "You don't mind, do you?"

You couldn't have shaken your head any faster, even with his grip on your chin.

"Good. Now, stay still. I think this will be a good color on you, anyway,"

He pulls you in with ease, letting his lips rest on yours for a second or two, before pulling back. Short but sweet, enough to make you feel like your entire body has gone numb.

He inspects your face, humming to himself...

"Good so far," he says, bringing you closer again. "But that was too safe. I won't hold back next time. Are you ready?"

You nod. Barely anything had happened, and you're already breathless. "Ready,"

Another smile crosses his perfect face, though he doesn't give you any time to admire it before he's kissing you again, one hand still cupping your face, the other holding the back of your neck and pressing you closer.

Definitely not a very platonic kiss.

It takes him longer to pull away this time, though when he does, it gives you a perfect view of his still-pristine makeup.

"Hmm... still nothing. I'm quite impressed with this line," he says, reaching behind you and returning with the wooden box. "How do you feel?"

Dizzy. Light-headed. Warm.

"Good," you say.

Rule number five: do not fall in love with him.

Or do.

"Not too much, I hope?"

A delightful realization was beginning to come over you, one that made all you had thought about him null and void:

No one else could possibly give you a guide on Vil Schoenheit, because he writes the rules himself.

"No. That was perfect,"

"Excellent," he smiles, and flips the box open again. "Because we still have six more colors to test."

[glassica]

Outsiders

Notes: M!yan transmigrator x Gn!reader reincarnator, isekai, jealousy, mentions of violence

Continued from Second Male Lead, with a different yan.

"Looks like someone got rejected huh?", your best friend tucked head to the side, eyes full of mischief, didn't bother pretending to sympathize with your loss for a bit. This was why you dreaded seeing him so much. You knew well he would just make fun of your miserable love life.

"Shut up! He didn't. I just realize that I'm no match to the heroine!", you groaned, shooting an icy glare at your friend, "Honestly how am I supposed to compete with the universe's favorite?! I know she's the main character but still... isn't it too unfair for us extras?"

"Unfair only for you, I actually have a blast there. Crazy how relaxing life is when you not aiming too out of league.”

He laughed and teased you senselessly, but inside the man was breathing sighs of relief. You didn't want to know what would he do to the second male lead had you two become a couple. Nothing much, just some little stabs on the chest and limbs ripping apart maybe...

At first he was so scared seeing himself transported to this world. He knew about the isekai stuff, but applying those knowledge to reality was a different story. He had no clue about the worldbuilding nor the plot, thus struggled desperately to blended in high society. Besides, he couldn't tell anyone about him belonging to different world, he would be called crazy and outcasted from all circles.

So it was a miracle that he met you, another soul stuck in same situation. Because you had read the series and been living there since birth, you were able to provide him with necessary information about the novel. Through you, he learned about the Kingdom, the protagonists, the future events, etc. in addition to all the etiquette and secrets of nobility. At one point, you confessed to him about the second male lead, the love of your (now and previous) life.

Who you pined after was none of his business, yet the man found himself growing unbearably irritated the more he heard about that name. Your best friend always bore a bitter grin on his face whenever you gushed about your crush, sometimes he sneaked in snide remarks, suggesting the second lead was probably just a mediocre guy. “If he was really charming like you made him out to be,” your friend argued, “he should’ve been the hero instead of getting shoved outside midway to be honest.” You huffed, who he thought he is to downplay the man of your dream like that? And why did your friend like belittling your feelings so much?

No. He didn’t look down on you at all, he just hated the fact that you were paying attention anyone but not him. He couldn’t accept the sight of you longing for another man when he was right there. The one who was aware of your deepest secret, the one who witnessed all your goodness and uglies, the one who could share your struggles of adapting to new world. He knew you the best, obviously he was the right choice for you.

And perhaps the man should admit deep down, he was also terrified of the future without you. You had come and guided him through the puzzling maze of noble life, be there for him when he was on verge of giving up everything. He had been acquainted with your lovely presence, no way he would let anyone steal it away from him. Little dirt on hands wasn’t a bad price to pay if that means you would be chained forever to him.

You might be a worthless extra in their story, but always the main character in his story.

[dr-spectre]

I watched this YouTube shorts video which has over 100k likes on it where it basically went "oh the Splatoon fandom is weirdddddd!!! It has weird porn in it guys!!! Isn't that crazy?!?! It's so toxic guys!!! They found ways to weaponise racism guys!! They are so vile about splatfests guys!!!! They are gooning to splatoon characters!!! They are kids!!"

I hate to break it to you dude but.... that's literally every fanbase in existence.

Every single fandom on planet earth has weird porn in it. Splatoon is no different. Is it fucking weird to goon over the player Inklings and Octolings as they are confirmed to be under 18? YES! VERY VERY WEIRD AND THAT BEHAVIOUR NEEDS TO GET CALLED OUT!!!!!! But a large majority of fans who engage in NSFW content are looking at the Idols and other adult characters, not the literal teenagers. Plus adult Inkling and Octoling ocs do exist, i should know BECAUSE I MADE MY OWN!!!!!

Also do not judge people's fetishes unless it's actively harming someone or it's illegal. That's wrong on so many levels. Stop making people feel guilty about what they are into man. If someone wants to make an NSFW art piece with Marie's feet then I'm not gonna judge them publicly for it. That's straight up rude and the guy in the video was basically doing that by showing some stolen fetishy art and adding an "eww" audio clip on it... Fuck off dude. Leave them alone.

He also got the release year of Splatoon wrong by saying 2013 instead of 2015.... Not the worst mistake but still... Kinda paints a picture on how much he truly cares about this franchise you know?

One of his points can be boiled down to "they are using splatfests as a way to weaponize racism." What the FUCK are you talking about? The last time i remember a Splatfest being toxic was in Splatoon 1 with CALLIE VS MARIE! THAT WAS REALLLLLLLL BAD! Other than that it's been friendly jokes and little jabs at the enemy teams. He fucking used this terrible video as a way to demonstrate his point too....

Every Splatoon fan on the planet doesn't like that video, It just comes off to me as so disingenuous.

Also fun fact! SPLATOON 1 TO 3 HAD UNDERLYING THEMES ABOUT RACISM WITH THE INKLINGS AND OCTOLINGS!!!!!! Splatoon 1 was about the introduction of that idea and it was very black and white with hints of grayness found in the sunken scrolls. Splatoon 2 was about making it more gray as Callie joined the Octarians and THE ENTIRETY OF OCTO EXPANSION!!!!!!!!!!! Splatoon 3 was the conclusion to that theme with DJ Octavio helping out the NSBS and Octolings co-existing with Inklings peacefully. But did he bring that up? NOPE!!!!!!!

Trying to paint the Splatoon fandom as some "toxic trojan horse" is just... fucking wrong. There are plenty of fandoms out there that are 100x worse than Splatoon's. The Splatoon community is extremely diverse and sure there are issues that need to fixed and yes there is racism. The Splatoon community is leagues above any other shooter game community by far. Play a bunch of quick play matches of Overwatch or TF2 to see what I'm saying. You're gonna be seeing the n word more times than a Quintin Tarantino movie.

Also he talked about peak character design in the Splatoon games, and the one character he mentioned was.... Big Man... The only male Idol and not anyone else. That just seems a bit.... suspicious to me...

[that1emowitch]

here me out

AU where instead of doing the whole red hood thing, jason just stays with the all caste. he finally meets the batfam when the justice league is facing a threat and need the help of the all caste. could be pretty good angst, since it directly disproves every shitty thing bruce said about jay, and bruce realises that his son was alive like way later than in canon

also it's a crime that jayessence basically doesn't exist, there are 11 fics on ao3. i want jayessence and competent!jason pls

That'll be so interesting, ur right! I'm definitely gonna go read RHATO issues again so I refresh my memory (if there r any other issues with the all-caste story PLEASE lmk cuz i have a very tumultuous love/hate relationship with RHATO lol)

I think Jason would've been happier, with the All-Caste. Talia would've visited him when she could (let's make her a mom not a pedo), Ducra would've trained him in every single war form she knew, putting hum on a path to surpass even her

Essence and Jay would've been her top students (if u don't mind, could u pls give me a lil recap on what Essence's story is? I kinda got confused in that part. Was she banished? She's one of the Untitled, technically, is she not? I don't rmbr 😭)

But basically, Jayessence! I've never read a fic about it or written one, but I've always thought it was an interesting dynamic! It'd be fun to try writing it out. Maybe I'll make a happier AU, where Essence and Jason train together under Ducra, both of them named her heirs. That kinda makes them play-fight with each other which ends up with them kissing. Oh god Jason would be so smitten by her, he'd pretend to be annoyed but he knows she's a goddess, knows she could kill him in a blink, knows his blade could kill her—but they both choose to love. AAHHABSBSHS I'm dying

Then the Untitled attack.

I love Ducra so much, she's their BAMF Granny, so let's not kill her. Maybe instead, she is kidnapped, in hopes of getting Jason and Essence to surrender (They know these two could destroy them). And at the same time, the Untitled are also attacking JLA outposts, for a reason I'll come up with later. Bruce remembers, back when he trained under the League, Ra's mentioning evil beings of this type, immortal and unstoppable by all but the All-Caste. Hence they seek their help.

And with Ducra gone, Jason and Essence are in charge, and they have to meet with the JLA—with Batman, Superman, and WW, specifically.

Jason makes sure to cover himself completely. Puts white nose generators in his mask and chest plate to ward off Supes. Makes sure to double, triple check his voice modulator. He cannot risk them finding out his true identity.

Not when he's finally recovering from his past as Robin.

I'm imaging they work together for a while, with everyone noticing the Red Hood (would he still be called Red Hood, if he never returned to Gotham? Maybe? Maybe he was reclaiming it, as a way to heal himself instead of for getting revenge) basically everyone notices RH being antsy around Batman. The amount of effort he puts into concealing his identity, unlike the other members of All-Caste. His name being Joker’s old name, something deeply meaningful to Gothamites.

Batman thinks RH is a reformed Gotham villain, who he's dealt with before. He thinks that's why RH doesn't ever face him, doesn't look him in the eye. He feels bad for him, but is strangely proud (just feel like mentioning, the thing about Batman is, he cares SO MUCH. About everyone. He feels sorrow when they lose themselves to their insanity, feels guilt over it. And he feels pride when they bounce back, grow better, like Harley Quinn did.) Like, this man, this absolute machine, clearly well honed and trained, who seems more than capable of taking on the entire Justice League by himself. Clearly he has experience.

Essence helps Jason through it. Soothes him at night when he has panic attacks, because his Dad is two rooms away from him. Helps him cope. Helps him calm down.

Then one day in some battle, one of the Untitled fatally injures Jason, and Batman is the only one nearby. Batman takes a hasty decision, rips Jason's mask off to save him.

And freezes.

That... that's his son. He looks older, more scarred, but thats... that's his SON!

(ALSO another addition: when they find Ducra she's like "uncuff me, and I'll show you just who Essence and Jason learnt from" BAMF!DUCRA FOR LIFEE)

Sorry for the rambling I just kept getting ideas and I kept writing lol

I promise I'll write this as a proper story as soon as I can, thanks so much for the ask! As usual, lmk in the comments if you'd like me to tag u in updates, also feel free to share any ideas u have! I'm just writing what yall want to read that makes me happy hehe

[crsssie]

baby, you can find me under the lights

word count: 9.1k

warnings: slow burn, mentions of drugs

summary: Ah, it feels good to be loved.

Hard. This is. Hard.

Jaime stumbles over his words as Khaji Da warns him for his spike in heartbeat, his head spinning as you stare up at him, blinking owlishly. You look pretty. Seriously, you look gorgeous. He's stumbling over his words just to ask you where his building was. It wasn't even as if he was asking for your number! Seriously, do people like you even exist—

You tilt your head at him, blinking.

asking you to repeat yourself.

nevermind. you do.

"Ah, uh, dios mio—" He pauses. "do you know where the school of biology is? It's my first day here, and—"

You point at the building on the other side, and Jaime sighs. "Oh my god. I'm stupid, so sorry—"

You wave your hand dismissively, smile on your face.

smile holds no menace. seeming to say 'me too'

"Thank you, but really—"

You raise a brow at him.

"Not you. Well, thank you, yes, but not the latter part." He sighs. "I've had a long morning."

You wave bye to him as you rush off into the building.

"Is she mute?"

no signs of vocal cord damage

"So she just." Jaime glances down at his watch, cursing as he realizes he's about to be late to class. "I'll ignore it. Put a tab on her."

got it. unusually high levels of dopamine and adrenaline detected in bloodstream.

"Ignore it." Jaime mumbles. "I just think she's cute."

In retrospect, Jaime has no idea why he would need to keep a tab on you, but he finds it especially helpful when he's met face to face with who the scarab calls you, except it's not really you, it's some person with flamboyant makeup drawn over their face, and Khaji Da insists it's you. All Jaime can notice is how you're a metahuman, a voice as honeyed as a siren's. He shakes his head to try and break free of your voice.

"What's wrong? Cat got your tongue?" You tilt your head at him, setting him down as you soar back to the supervillain. His jaw stays open before he closes it, realizing the situation.

"Khaji."

a metahuman

"Well, I can't have her fight alone, can I?" Jaime sighs as his armor clasps on, flying next to you, lending you a hand as he blocks a punch. "Having trouble?"

"Appreciate the help." You smile, landing a kick to the villain's face, stepping on it as you send him into the ground. The back of your heel causes a crack to ring and the man's face to cave in, and Jaime stares, eyes wide as Khaji Da tells him that the man's alive and has a high chance of survival. "Are you visiting? Does my city owe a member of the Justice League something?"

"No," Jaime shakes his head. "I... I live here now. I just moved."

"You... alright." You mumble. "For all I know, you could be moving here for retirement."

"Hey, I am not that old." Jaime gasps. "I'm—"

Khaji Da stops him before he can reveal his age. A smarter choice. Jaime really needs to fix his blurting problem.

You raise a brow at him, leaning closer, tilting your head. "You're...?"

"Uh, top secret information." He smiles, trying his best to focus on your face and not the way you were practically sticking on him. It was bad enough that he thought you were cute. He did not need another reason for being head over heels in love with you. Seriously, he's not the type for love at first sight, what kind of witchery do you have?!

You huff, leaning back. "Alright. You do you."

"Are there many villains here?"

"Not really. Just pigface here." You point at the man under you. "Though, you'll probably bring in your fair share of supervillains, huh?"

"I don't have that many."

"Still have some." You hum. "Alright. See you around, beetle boy. I wouldn't recommend sticking around. The police kinda hate us."

Jaime looks at the unconscious man as you fly. "Wait, do we—"

The police arrive as he's cut off, and he races off himself. He did not want a bullet shot at him, but he also did not want to deal with the police so early on in a new city. That could be saved for some time that wasn't right now.

Besides, he has his bio seminar to get to. Seriously, what is with him and arriving late to class?

Turns out, Jaime bumps into you much more than he thinks is coincidental.

First, the two of you bump into each other at the cafeteria, then the two of you meet at the library, then at the gym, and then you share a building at the dorms? Seriously, what is with the two of you and meeting? At this point he might as well call one of you a stalker, and it is most certainly not him. He doesn't think it's you either, especially with how unnerved you are while bumping into him. All you do is wave hello with a small smile and head the other way. Seriously, he was looking creepy. You were cute, he did NOT want to be scaring you off before he could even befriend you. Besides, it's not like his body is— it's... Khaji Da, isn't it.

"¿hermano, la estás acosando?" Jaime mumbles to the scarab. boy, are you stalking her?

I don't know what you're talking about

"'kay, can we cut it down? Seriously, I'd like to not see her every day."

I thought you liked her.

"Thinking someone is cute does not equate to liking them." He groans, swiping his student ID to get his lunch.

I am simply creating more opportunities for the two of you to meet

"Can you not control my body for something like this?" He takes his salad, running a hand through his hair as he crashes into someone. "Oh, I am sosorry—"

You blink up at him, shaking your head.

she says it's fine

"Are you sure? Let me know if I can do anything to make it up to you, really." Jaime nods.

You wave your hand, dismissing him as you head upstairs to find an empty table.

increased heart rate detected

"Oh, dios, please be quiet." Jaime rushes out of the cafeteria, embarrassment all over his face, cheeks flushed with blood.

As he reaches his dorm, he hears the sound of something going off almost comically, and he freezes. Didn't you mention that there weren't many supervillains other than the guy that was arrested recently? Come on.

The cafeteria you were just at. No signs of human damage. The girl is fighting.

Jaime sets his salad down, opening the window, and jumping out, his suit sending him straight to the cafeteria, blasting a piece of wood out of the way as your hand finds itself around the man's throat as Jaime sets down next to you.

"I thought you said there weren't many supervillains here?" Jaime's arm shifts into a taser as he presses it to the man, knocking him out.

"But plenty of frustrated college students." You smile at him. "this one tried bombing the building."

Jaime blinks.

heartbeat steady. Not lying.

"What's your name, by the way?"

"Wouldn't you like to know, beetle boy." You roll your eyes.

"Do you not have a name?"

You tilt your head at him. "And if I do?"

"Why won't you tell me?"

"Who knows. Maybe you'll commit identity fraud." You smile, tapping his chest twice. "Though, you seem a little too tall to steal my identity."

"I won't, so could I please know the name of the partner I'll be working with to fight crime?" Jaime holds his hand out for you, leaning down slightly to stare at you.

"Kinda hard to tell sincerity through those gorgeous yellow eyes of yours, beetle." You give him your hand anyway, shaking it. "Unidentified. Though, the police like calling me Euterpe."

"Like the greek muse?"

"Yeah. In charge of music and stuff." You shrug. "You're just blue beetle because of the suit, huh?"

"Yeah." He pauses. "Are the police coming?"

"They always are." You hum. "Two minutes, maybe."

"How do they know when you don't call?"

"I don't need to." You tilt your head slightly. You point at the students outside the building that Jaime had passed. "They do."

"Are you the school mascot or something?"

"Time's up." You smile. "Alright beetle boy, time to get going."

You speed off into the air as Jaime chases after you. "You didn't answer my question!"

"You have a lot of questions for someone who's just arrived." You come to an abrupt stop as Jaime freezes into place.

"Seriously, how has the Justice League not cataloged you? They sent me a list of everyone in the city and—"

"God, B's just as crazy as I remember him being." You grimace. "I'm not on the catalog— too secretive for his liking. B would really rather not catalog me."

"Why's that."

You pause. "I have a handful of mutant genes instead of just one. Weird superpowers come with all of them. If you really want my file, go find Red Robin at the Titans' tower. He ran a whole sampling of my DNA and everything. The Titans Archive has my file."

"Why doesn't Batman have it?"

"Mm..." You pause. "No time?"

"That man is retired. You have to have a better explanation than just that."

"Can we take it to the dorms? I'm at the point where I think you know who I am anyway." You sigh. "You keep bumping into me on a campus this big. You're practically stalking me."

"I'm not—"

"You're going to have to prove that to me. I see you everywhere." You sigh. "I have a single complex, come on."

"Did you win the lottery?"

"You can do a lot with a voice like mine." You drop onto the roof, suit coming off as you do.

"How'd you get that off?"

"Illusion magic."

"Seriously, you're practically a green lantern." He grimaces. "Or a magician."

"Your suit just came off too, you know?" You raise a brow, swiping your ID. "Does the beetle do that? Can I see the beetle?"

"Next thing I know you'll be asking me to strip for you." Jaime jokes.

"Oh, well, not that I'd be against that, but—" You shut up when you pass a student.

"At least you have a filter." He mumbles.

"How old are you anyway? I was going to ask if you were a fourth year, but from the way you don't know where the bio building is, there's no way you are." You glance at the signs.

"First year."

"Oh, so like, fresh out of high school?"

"No, I took a gap year." he hums. "Now I'm trying to finish college and get into dental school."

"Oooh, big dreams." You mumble. "I'll let you practice on me when you're in dental school."

"It isn't cosmetology, you know?"

"Eh." You shrug. Your keys materialize in your hand as you unlock the door to your dorm. "The fake teeth can only last you for so long. Welcome to my dorm."

"What kind of luck do you have?"

"I told you. My voice." You smile. "Would you like to see it in action? Have the scarab read my lips for you. You'll need earplugs. What's your Starbucks order?"

"A cappuccino. Wh-what are you doing?" Jaime chases after you as you step out of your apartment again, knocking on the door across the hall. You toss him earplugs with a wink, knocking on your neighbor's door. Jaime puts them in as he watches you.

"What?" A guy opens the door, visibly annoyed.

Your lips part, sickly sweet words spilling down your tongue, and Khaji Da speaks.

"could you get me a grande cappuccino and sweetened peach green tea from the Starbucks downstairs? Set it by my door and knock when you finish, please?" You bat your lashes at him twice, and the guy blinks back.

Jaime watches in shock as something glazes over the guy's eyes and he nods at you, heading inside and coming out with his phone in hand, locking his door as he heads down the hall.

"That's one of my abilities." You smile. You reach for the plugs in his ears, and he flinches back slightly, pulling them out himself. "Sorry. Am I too much?"

"It's really hard to have a normal heartbeat around someone like you."

"Honored you would think of me as hot." You smile. "Do you want anything to eat? I cook."

"You got tamales?"

"Oh, I do! I just dropped by one of the cultural clubs' president's house, and she came back with a bag of them. I just don't know how to cook them. Care to help?" You rummage through your freezer, brows furrowed. "Here. Yeah?"

Jaime holds his hand out for you to hand it to him, and he hums. "You got a steamer?"

"Top cabinet on the left of the stove." You hum.

"Do they make you pay utilities here?"

"No." You hum. "Which is why I keep the lights and AC on the entire day. I only turn off the lights in my room when I sleep."

"How much... is it a year?"

You visibly freeze, closing the fridge. "I'd rather not discuss that."

"A lot?"

"I don't look at the bill when I send all of it as fake invoices to Wayne Enterprises." You laugh awkwardly, pulling the steamer out.

warning: rapid heart rate increase.

"Yes, Khaji, I know." He mumbles through his teeth.

"Hm?"

"No, not you." He smiles. "How do I put this? I have a scarab in my back."

"Oh, I know." You smile. "It's pretty... visible when you're at the gym. there's like a huge bump on your back."

"You look at me at the gym?!"

"Hard not to when your back muscles look like that. You got a routine I can follow?" You wiggle your brows jokingly.

"Um, lifting seven hundred pounds worth of metal when a skyscraper falls over."

"Oh, I don't need to do that." You shrug. "I just tell the metal to get out of the way."

"Your voice works on more than just humans?"

You puff your cheeks, looking to the side. "Yes?"

"Do you have like, some cosmic control over the universe or something?"

"I could pull a my little pony princess celestia and tell the sun to go down right now." You bat your lashes innocently.

Jaime blinks owlishly, fear in the back of his mind, confusion on his face. You can what. What in the Mary Sue self insert is that voice of yours? It was like God himself made you extra special, even down to the genetics. A metahuman could have powers that strong? Though, how did you even discover that you could make the sun set? Something else snaps at the thought of your voice being so powerful. Can you command... food to cook?

"Couldn't you just cook the tamales with your voice?"

"I've never really tried that." You pause. "I don't know what works and doesn't work, I just know that I can make the sun set and moon rise."

"YOU'VE TRIED!?"

You ignore him, pulling out a tamale. "Cook, please?"

You toss it in the air as it gets hot instantly, and before Jaime can react, Khaji Da is sending his body to grab a plate and catch the tamale. You blink as Jaime catches it (just barely) and the two of you exhale in relief as Jaime sets the plate down. You blink at the bag and then at the piping hot tamale on the plate, jaw-dropping.

"I never have to cook ever again." You mumble. "Oh my god... this is a revelation. This is so much easier than I ever thought it'd be."

"Though, it might be better to cook it on a plate next time." Jaime mumbles, setting the plate down.

burn detected on left hand.

Jaime grabs your wrist, unfolding your hand as he stares at the wound. "It's hurt."

"Oh, I can just—"

"Do you want me to wrap it for you?" Jaime stares at you, eyes gentle, and your heart soars. Holy fuck he's cute. Yeah, screw the voice thing, he's wrapping it up for you. You're gonna take advantage of this. God, you're going to combust. Holy shit, was someone allowed to look this cute? You need to go outside and touch grass, holy shit.

"Y-yeah! Sure!" You blink, eyes wide. "Please. Thank you. I'll uh, give me a second." You stare at the cabinet. "Open, please."

The cabinet door opens.

"First aid kit, land on the counter, please?"

The kit lands, and you call to close the cabinet as there's a knock on the door. Jaime lets go of your hand, turning to go to the door.

"I'll get i—" You place a hand on Jaime's shoulder, shaking your head.

"Stay, please."

Jaime finds himself stuck in place as you open the door, a smile on your face as you take the drinks.

"Do you need anything else?" It's the same guy as before.

"Nope." You smile. "Thank you."

Jaime watches as the man's eyes return to normal, a confused look on his face as he raises a brow at you.

"Should, I, uh, pay you back for the drinks? How much was it?" You blink prettily at him, and Jaime's heart stops when the guy waves you off.

heart rate quickened. indicated attraction to her.

Holy fuck, were you using pretty privilege on your flatmate?

He leaves eventually, and you place the drinks on the counter. "A hot cappuccino during summer?"

"There's AC in your dorm." Jaime mumbles. "Did you use pretty privilege on him?"

"Oh, silly boy." You laugh. "Everyone thinks I'm the most attractive person ever."

"How?" Jaime tries moving, realizing you had put him in place. "Can I be freed?"

"Thank you for staying still." You smile.

"You don't want a tamale?" He opens the first-aid kit, pulling out the bandages and gauze.

"After I burned myself? I'd rather not." You wince as Jaime disinfects the burn.

"How'd you manage to burn yourself?"

"Erm... not sure!" You hum. "but I cooked the tamale."

"Let's cook it the normal way next time." Jaime mumbles. "You want me to cook anything?"

"Can you cook?"

"Yes, most definitely." Jaime wraps your wound gently, brows pulled into a worried frown. "worked at my tía's diner over summer during my gap year."

"Wow, sounds fun." You hum.

"You ever worked?"

"No." You mumble. "My work is my superhero business. I have a gofundme to help. You'd be surprised at how long of a way a little fanservice goes. Can you just boil me some soft eggs?"

"Runny yolk?"

"Semi." You hum. "I have a sauce in the fridge to marinate the eggs in. Thank you."

"Do you enjoy cooking? You have every single sauce and spice I can imagine." Jaime rummages through your cabinet. "Also, what did you mean earlier by everyone thinks you're the most attractive person ever?"

"Beauty is subjective— yeah, I like cooking— so if I tell myself that I want to be the prettiest person in the world, then everyone sees me slightly differently. It's a little manipulative, but it gets the job done." You mumble.

"What about the creeps?"

"I can fight." You hum.

"Is there a reason you need to come off as that way?"

"Only when I'm in suit." You hum. "I look perfectly plain when I'm out of the superhero face."

"And what's this fanservice of yours?"

You smile, your cheeks pulling up but your eyes unchanged. "My onlyfans is linked on my twitter."

Jaime chokes as he turns off the sink, neck-snapping to look at you. "W-what?"

"That was a joke." You hum. "It's just a gofundme. I'm... I'm close with a good number of fans. It's like Superman, you catch my drift?"

"He does have a good relationship with the citizens of Metropolis."

"Yeah, and Batman's hated by all." You snort. "That's a joke. Gotham would kill for that man."

"They would?"

"Ask a Gothamite what they think about Batman and you get an annoyed grunt, but lasso them with the lasso of truth, and they'll admit that they're actually grateful for the man." You lean on the palm of your head. "Thank you for making me the most attractive person ever."

Nothing changes for Jaime as he blinks at you. He blinks a couple more times at you, wondering if his eyes were deceiving him, but you look the exact same. The realization causes a smile to break onto his face slowly, eyes warm and affectionate as he looks at you. You're already pretty to him. How beautiful.

"So? You like how I look?"

"You look the same." Jaime hums, jumping when the water nearly boils over, opening the cap as he places the eggs in. "shit."

You laugh, chest flushed with warmth, shy smile on your lips. Your chest feels overwhelmingly full, like a piece of it that had been lost was returned to you, making you whole again. God, he can't just say that to you and expect you to not fall for him. You grimace inwardly. Falling at the slight sign of affection. How classic of you. Though, your chest is warm, and that was always a good feeling to have. "Yeah?"

"Yeah." He blinks at you.

increasing heart rate—

"Please, not now." He hisses.

"Does the beetle speak?"

"To me." Jaime mumbles. "He's like a voice in my head."

"Could I suggest putting an earbud in to pretend you're on the phone so you don't look insane?"

Jaime pauses. "Huh. I've never considered that."

"Yeah." You mumble. "It gets people off your ass."

"How come you don't speak when you're walking around?" He raises a brow. "I thought you were mute until the scarab identified you as the hero."

You shrug. "It's easier."

"Easier for what?"

You shrug. "People don't talk to you much when you don't speak."

"Do you want me to peel the eggs for you?" Jaime lifts the pot into the sink.

"Oh, no, it's fine. Thank you." You hum, getting out of the seat. You wave him off as you pour the water out, focusing on the eggs. "Peel the shell off cleanly, please."

The eggshells detach perfectly, and you open your fridge, pulling out the sauce.

"Are you in any clubs?"

"Acapella Choir and Writer's United." You mumble. "I also hang out with the kids in musical theater."

"I forgot that was a major here."

"We're a surprisingly art-oriented school for one with such a good stem program." You seal the container again, putting it in the fridge. "Clean yourselves, please."

The dishes turn clean with a swirl, and you place them in the dish machine to dry.

"What's the magic word?" Jaime raises a brow.

You smile. "Can't say it."

"Why not?"

"Then it'll come true." You hum. "I think you've listened enough times for it."

"How come you don't fight crime with it?" He hums. "Your voice would do wonders."

You hum. "It wears my voice out."

"Do you speak to your professors?"

"Yeah?" You raise a brow.

"But you don't speak to students?"

"I speak when necessary." You shrug.

"So telling me where the bio building wasn't necessary?"

"No." You sigh. "Of course not. Oh, right. I never learned your civilian name. I can't just keep calling you beetle boy."

"Jaime. Jaime Reyes." He holds his hand out for you, and you take it, your own name spilling past your lips.

Jaime finds that you're not as much of a red flag as you came off as. You bump into him every now and then, nodding as you do, and then you rush off for your classes. Jaime only ever gets to speak to you while on duty, wrestling the criminals to the ground as you knock them out. He doesn't get to speak to you very much— the police have gotten much faster with arriving at the scene of the crime. Usually, by the time he's chased after you, you've already detransformed and gone to class. Seriously, your schedule is appalling. How many units are you even taking?

"Alright, I know you're in there. Come on, open up." Jaime knocks on your door for the nth time, and you finally, finally open it, sighing at him.

"What do you want?"

"To hang out? Seriously, I haven't made any friends since coming here other than you, and that's only because you and I fight crime together!"

"That does not sound like a me problem." You deadpan.

"I brought tea."

"Oh, why didn't you start with that?" You open the door fully, letting Jaime in. "I'll let you chill for a bit, but I have somewhere to go in a little."

"Where? It's 7pm on a Tuesday." He sets the tea on the counter, raising a brow.

"Frat party starts at 8 but you're technically supposed to get there starting 9. No one ever goes on time." You hum. "Did you want to stay the night?"

"No. That'd be a little..." He pauses. "Mami raised a man better than that."

You bark out a laugh. "That's sweet. Thank your mom for that, please. Not many women end up with such sweethearts of children."

"Are you calling me a sweetheart?" Jaime grins.

"Mm, sure." You hum. "Much better than half of the men on campus, that's for sure."

"Why are you going to a frat party?"

"For the vibes." You hum. "I also got news that something was going to happen there, so you gotta be prepared, you know? It's halfway across campus."

"Should I go?"

"If you want." You hum. "Give me a sec, I'll move everything to the island."

"Do you need help?" He cranes his neck as you disappear into the corridor.

"I'll be fine." You call.

Jaime watches as you move a bag and mirror onto the table, and he watches in silence as you start your makeup.

spike of dopamine in bloodstream. hermano, do something. ask her out.

"No!" Jaime hisses. "she's going to think it's creepy!"

"What's creepy?" You raise a brow at him, amusement on your lips.

"Nothing! Khaji is speaking." Jaime avoids your eyes.

"Is that the beetle's name?" You go back to the makeup.

"Yes."

You hum back, finishing with your makeup, pausing.

"Couldn't you have the magic do it?"

"Yeah, but," You sigh. "it only knows how to do my hero look."

"It's taught?"

"I can make it copy images on a screen, but I dont have that many products to work off of." You hum. "You want me to do your makeup?"

"I'm good." Jaime mumbles. "Is a frat party even safe?"

"Depends on the person. Is it icky? Yes. Is it fun to feel individualization in a crowd of strangers? Also yes." You hum.

"Don't you get hit on if you..." He pauses. "no. you're not in costume."

"I sure am going to get hit on if I transform, though." You hum. "It's happened before. They like spiking poison or toxins in frat party drinks. Can Khaji Da scan water for toxins?"

yes.

"He said yes." Jaime mumbles.

"Then go with me?" You smile at him awkwardly. "Please? Maybe you'll make friends there too. Hm? Didn't you come in complaining about how you didn't know anyone here?"

Jaime sighs. "I'm not drinking, though."

"Oh, yeah. Your boundaries still matter, obviously." You pause. "Don't Mexican families throw huge parties and drink there?"

"Sorry, let me rephrase that. I'm not drinking frat house beverages." Jaime corrects himself. "Someone's saliva could be in it for all I know."

"'kay, yeah, that makes sense." You mumble. "Are you just going to go in that?"

"What do you mean?"

"Mm." You think for a moment, staring at Jaime. "You know what. Yeah. The shirt's fine. Unbutton two buttons and you'll be fine."

"Huh?"

"Do you need me to do it?" You raise a brow. "They won't let you in if you look too formal, but they also won't let you in if you look too casual. Well, that's a lie. They'd let you in if you were in a tank top, but since you can't... at least try and look like a frat boy."

"I'm hurt." Jaime scoffs as you step close to him.

"Can I?"

"Do what you must."

You reach a hand into his hair, messing it up first, blinking slowly at his face. Jaime holds his breath as you're practically stuck on him, chest pressed to his, and he swears his heartbeat is scarily quick right now. He stares down at your eyes as you stare at his hair, fingers pulling gently to mess it up more than it was. In fact, he should be—

warning: quickened heart beat.

There it is.

Jaime curses under his breath, and you stop, blinking up at him as he leans back.

"Hm?"

"That's the scarab. My heart's beating too fast." He avoids your gaze again, looking up at the ceiling.

"So like, a defense mechanism?" You tilt your head. "Can I... unbutton your shirt slightly?"

"Yeah, uh, sure." He holds his breath as you slide it open slightly, freezing in place when you stare at his chest for a little too long. "You alright?"

"Yeah." You mumble, pulling away, hiding your face. "Yeah. I'm fine. God."

detected increased heart rate.

"You sure?" He tilts his head to get a better look at you, noticing your skin has flushed darker. Ah. So you were flustered too.

"You wanna go?" You finally speak up. "We should get going. It's across town."

"We can fly there. Well, you can."

"I'm not flying for a frat party."

"And you'll walk?"

"At least I won't be drunk." You mumble. "Besides, I can just sleep on one of the benches here. At least we don't have anti-homeless architecture on this campus."

"What's with all the crime on campus anyway?"

"Oh, you didn't know? Everyone here is tied into crime in some way." You smile, opening your fridge. "there's correlation between creativity and sociopathic tendencies, after all."

Jaime blinks slowly. "What."

stable heart beat. Not lying.

"Heros end up desensitized too." You pull out the whipped cream, squirting it right into your mouth as you swallow. You lick your lips as you set the bottle back into the fridge."Come on."

The school is shaped more and more like a prison, Jaime thinks. The architecture is shooting proof, and all the windows are bulletproof. He wasn't sure if it was because of safety worries or the amount of crime. The school wasn't known for crime, so it was a little strange being told that petty crime was common in the school. Well, maybe it was. It's probably less than whatever's going on in Gotham anyway.

"Is... petty crime common here?" Jaime winces at how uncertain he sounds.

"It's..." You pause. "It's not that common, actually. It just seems that ever since you came, our crime rate has gone up."

"Pinning the blame on me?" Jaime fakes offense.

"Yeah." You joke. "Any plans on how to make friends?"

"Any tips?"

"Find the people who are in the corner." You mumble. "Or something. I don't know. Get to know people over drinks. Just have the beetle scan the drinks for anything bad for you."

"What should I not touch?"

"The punch. The beer is usually fine. The beer tends to be canned."

"And the vodka?"

"It's alright. I take a shot of punch for liquid confidence, though." You hum. "But today I can't. I'll just have to shoot straight vodka."

"Or you could just, not drink?"

You shrug, getting to the door of the house, a guy greeting you.

"Ay! You're back!" He grins.

You grin back. "I brought a friend today. That's alright, right?"

"For you, sugarlips? Always."

You lick your lips, winking as you step into the house, Jaime in tow, his hand in yours.

half of the people here's bloodstream have high concentration of alcohol already. beware.

"Got it." Jaime mumbles, following behind you as you squeeze through the crowd. He gets a couple of looks, raised brows in interest and flirty winks. He wonders if you get this often too. Well, if you came and went looking like that, then surely you would. Maybe that's why everyone calls you a nickname. Jaime grows frustrated as he thinks of it. Did you have someone else?

"Sugarlips!" A guy wraps an arm around your shoulder, smiling. "Come back for more?"

"Brought a friend today." You point at Jaime.

The guy doesn't even bother looking at Jaime. "Your boy?"

"Not quite." You smile. "Hands off of him, though. You wouldn't mind telling the girlies that, would you?"

"No worries." He gives you a wink. "Should I tell the boys to keep their hands off too?"

Jaime nods at you, squeezing your hand gently.

"Please." you lick your lips, a smile on your face.

"Watch the punch for me, will you? Don't want anyone drugging it."

"We'll watch the punch." You nod.

"Of course, sugar." He laughs, nodding at Jaime as he heads back into the crowd.

"Well?" You tilt your head at Jaime as he stares at the punch.

Stick your finger in it for more thorough analysis. I can't tell anything without contact.

"Need a cup."

You grab a red solo cup, scoop the drink without the ladle and hand it to him. Jaime blinks twice at the liquid before giving up. Oh well, it's a frat party. What can he do about it?

"Is it always this messy?" Jaime sticks his finger in, waiting for the analysis.

"Occasionally it's worse." You hum. "So? Did you find anything?"

Unknown aphrodisiac toxin detected. Rohypnol drug detected. Liquid alcohol content 37%.

"Rophynol and an unknown aphrodisiac." Jaime repeats. "Alcohol content is 37%."

"Remove the flunitrazepam from the punch, please." You mumble quietly, the water swirling slowly from people's drinks. The powder hangs in the air as you open a plastic bag. "put the flunitrazepam into the bag, please." The powder swirls into the bag, and Jaime watches as you tuck it into your pocket. The crowd of people with drinks don't notice at all, not even when something bubbles out of their drinks.

"Then?" He raises a brow.

"Go have fun." You hum, flicking the cap off of the vodka. "Or have Khaji Da scan the people to figure out who decided to put the date rape drug in the punch, but not my problem." You pour yourself a shot. "I already figured it out when I walked in."

You tilt your head as you watch the vodka pour into the glass, eyes glistening as you do, eyes gentle and tired, and Jaime finds something in your eyes. He's not quite sure what it is, the spotty lights in the living room painting your skin different colors, but there's something about you, he supposes. Even in the way he takes your outfit in, finally, staring too hard at your face. Reds and greens dance across it, leading down to your shoulder. Something glistening on your arm catches his attention.

"You have powder on your shoulder." He reaches to wipe it. "who was it?"

"It's fine." You brush him off, putting the vodka back on the table. "Want a shot?"

Jaime furrows his brows, your name slipping past his lips. "who was it?"

Your name sounds like honey coming from him as you down the shot. God, you were down bad.

"Seriously, who is it?" Jaime knows at this point, only one person had touched your shoulder, but he wants to hear it from your mouth.

"Guy who had his hand on my shoulder. That's why he asked me to guard the drinks. Be right back." You smile at him, slipping into the crowd, going to find the girl he had his hands on.

Jaime tries following after you but loses you in the crowd, grimacing. You were probably looking for the guy who drugged everyone. "Khaji. Find her."

upstairs bedroom second on the left.

Jaime squeezes past the crowd to try and find you. If the guy was capable of drugging the punch, then god knows what he was capable of doing to you if you went alone. Sure, you can fight, but what if something does happen? He didn't want you getting hurt, even if he knew you could fight without a problem.

sounds like you like the girl

"Khaji, can you please," He slams the door open, staring as you have the man on the ground, heel pressed on his windpipe, the girl still unconscious on the bed. Jaime lets out a breath in relief as he steps over to you, Spanish spilling past his lips before he can think too much. "gracias a dios. ¿mi vida, qué demonios estás haciendo? ¡No huyas solo!" thank god. my life, what are you doing? Don't run off by yourself!

You blink in surprise as he breaks into scolding in Spanish, grabbing you by the arms, tilting your head to get a proper look for any bruises that could have landed on you, cursing you out for running off on your own, and you blink trying to keeping up with his words. At some point you press a hand over his mouth, pointing down at the man under you. Jaime follows your finger, remembering that you're stepping on a man's neck. You... crazy. Only you. He hears Khaji Da laugh in his head.

"We've really got a knack for speaking when you have a man's throat under your foot, huh?" Jaime mumbles, furrowing his brows. "Let him go."

"You called me mi vida." You press your chest to his, staring at him, batting your lashes. The pet name sends blood rushing to your head, drunk on the way it sounded so sweet falling from his lips. Did he mean it? Did he mean it when he called you his life? "Did you mean it?"

"It slipped out."

from your unconscious maybe.

"Khaji, shut up." Jaime hisses, face impossibly flushed. "Get off the man before he dies."

You step off of him, the man long passed out.

"Is he still breathing?"

breathing: stable

Jaime exhales quietly.

"So? Mi vida?" You smile cheekily, pointing at yourself. "Am I tu vida?"

Jaime tries avoiding the topic. You're a little tipsy right now. "You literally had a single shot. How are you already–"

blood alcohol content from breath: .06

"Seriously?!" Jaime grimaces as you stare up at him, expecting an answer, cheeks puffed out and frown on his face. "Will you get off of me if I say yes?"

"Depends if you're being honest." You grin, pressing your ear to his chest, listening to his heartbeat. "Push me off if you're uncomfortable."

"Seriously, you're drunk. You're probably not even conscious of half of the stuff you're doing." Jaime peels you from him, throwing you over his shoulder.

"EEK!! I'm being carried like a sack of potatoes!" You shriek, laughing. The alcohol is really messing with your brain. "I'll stay in the room. Go call for the guy at the door we greeted earlier. He'll know how to deal with this."

"I thought frathouses let things like this slide?" He sets you down on the bed next to the girl.

"Not this one. Especially not when he actually planned on doing something." You beam at him, eyes closed, lips quirked upward. "So, could you?"

"If you say the magic word." He tilts his head. He could have a little fun with you.

"That would make it a command." You mumble. "How about something I can give you? Go make a friend downstairs. Give him a friend, p—"

Jaime presses his hand to your mouth. "I don't need the help, thank you."

You blink slowly at him, licking his palm.

"Where'd you even learn that?!" He pulls his had away with a grimace.

"Go get the guy at the door." You groan. "I want to leave if you aren't going to make any friends."

"I'll take you home and then come back to make some friends if you really want me to." Jaime mumbles.

"It'll be too late by then. The police are coming soon."

"Huh?"

"Noise complaints." You shrug. "They break up around 1 or 2 am, so it'll be soon."

"It's been that long?!"

"Go get the guy from the door!" You land in the bed with a thud, sighing. "God, before I kiss you or something. Hurry up."

"Huh?" Jaime freezes in his tracts, turning around to stare at you.

"Don't you wanna know why they call me sugarlips?" You pout, resting your pinky on your bottom lip as you jut it out. You pull it down with a pop, blood rushing to Jaime's head as you do. He needs to leave before he does something to you. God, his self-control could only last him so long.

"That's definitely the alcohol talking." Jaime mumbles frantically, shutting the door behind him. His ears and face feel eerily warm despite being sober.

Ugh, you were a force to be reckoned with.

He hauls you out eventually, flying you to the dorm instead of walking, worried that you'd get hit on, even as he unlocks the door with his ID, you mumble quietly, half-asleep, half-conscious.

"Wake up. I don't know where your key is." Jaime shakes you gently. "Come on."

"Call me mi vida again." You whisper.

He complies, setting you down, a hand around your waist for support. "Mi vida, get your key, will you?"

You fish out the key, unlocking the dorm room. "Wanna stay the night?"

"I'm two floors down. It's fine." He mumbles.

key replication made

"What." Jaime freezes at Khaji's update. "excuse me?"

"Hm?" You raise a brow, door half-open.

"Not you. Shower and go to sleep when you get in." He sighs. "Yeah?"

"Can I have a goodbye ki—"

Jaime shoves you into your dorm, slamming the door closed as he holds it in place, heart racing, cheeks flushed, lips parted as he desperately tries to catch his breath. God. You are such a force to be reckoned with. He's going to get a heart attack with you around sometime. You're twice as bad when you're drunk. But hell did he want to kiss you. Too bad you were drunk. He couldn't think of taking advantage of you like that, even if you were the one who asked.

Jaime makes a mental note to keep you away from alcohol next time.

The next time you see Jaime, the two of you are actually fighting someone again. Your suit is on, your voice stopping the metal from slamming onto the civilians as you evacuate them. Jaime focuses on the man himself, hand transforming into a blaster as he shoots at the villain. Didn't you say most of the crime was minuscule in comparison with other cities? Well, this was minuscule compared to how many beetles he's fought because of who he was. At least there weren't other beetles in the city.

"I thought you said there weren't supervillains in this city!" He yells at you, voice coming out altered.

"They don't come often!" You yell, turning your attention to the metal. "Fall, please."

The metal slams down onto the ground as you tackle Jaime out of the way.

"Why did you let it fall?!"

"I can't hold things up for too long my throat hurts!" You shriek, turning to face the floating criminal." Pass out, right now, please!"

The supervillain drops on the ground with a thud, and you exhale, faceplanting into Jaime's suit with a sigh. You stay there for a couple of seconds, catching your breath, groaning as you finally sit up straight. Jaime can feel the plush of your skin despite the suit's barrier, and it is not something to feel while the adrenaline after a fight dissolves in his system.

"It was that easy!?" He rests on his arms, suit scanning the unconscious criminal.

"My throat hurts." You mumble, walking over to where the criminal was passed out. "Two minutes until police come."

"I'll fly you." He sits up with you, linking his arms behind your back and under your legs, wings fluttering as he soars into the sky. "Who pays reparation fees?"

"Taxes." You cough. "Ow."

"Stop talking!"

"Stop asking me questions— heUG." You reach to grab your throat, grimacing.

"Alright. Stop talking until we can figure out how to get your voice back without killing you." He groans. "At this point we might as well live on the dorm roof."

You grimace.

"Was your throat damaged when we met the first day?"

You shake your head.

"Oh, so you just hated me."

You lunge at him, annoyed.

initiating rough translation... "Are you crazy!? Do you know how much energy it takes to knock a supervillain out with my voice? You think I'm superman?! I didn't hate you the first day, I just didn't think it was worth the effort!"

"Don't lunge at me while I'm flying!" Jaime shrieks, nearly dropping you as he lands on the roof with a crash. "I didn't know! I can't analyze your entire genetic structure just from looking at you, you know?!"

"would you like to see me naked, then?"

"NO!" Jaime yells, leaning back as you shift on his lap. "Dios, now everyone's going to know that I landed on the roof. Hurry up on back to your place now."

"Jaime, pretty boy."

"What?" He tries to ignore the way the back of his head rushes with warmth at the pet name.

"I can't detransform without my voice."

Jaime freezes in place, blinking at you slowly as he lunges to grab you by the shoulders. "Speak. Detransform right now—"

"I CAN'T."

"You know," Jaime pauses. "I'm impressed that you can tell, Khaji. How are you reading her body language so well?"

unlike you, I have been observing her body language. she is a suitable person for you to date.

"WHAT." Jaime chokes, coughing to get the spit caught in his throat out. You jolt as he rests his head on your chest, coughing profusely.

Jaime, I need to see her in order to translate. Though, her heartbeat is abnormally fast.

Jaime looks up at you, where you're looking down at him, lips parted in embarrassment, eyes wide with confusion, skin flushed with warmth. Jaime probably doesn't look much better under the suit right now, his own heart fighting to break through his ribcage. You're just... so pretty. He stares at you a little too hard, eyes drinking in your figure, forgetting how close you are to him.

"Can I kiss you?"

That cuts Jaime out of his thoughts as he leans away from you. "I did not need to hear you ask if you could kiss me with the scarab's voice."

You blink at him owlishly, mischief dancing in your eyes.

"No." He answers. "Not with Khaji's voice asking me."

"will you go on a d—"

"NOT WITH HIS VOICE ASKING ME!" Jaime cries.

You grin at him cheekily, scooching close to press yourself to his chest again. You rest your cheek on his chest, lips curling upward as you bat your lashes. You like messing with him, he finds.

"Then my own?" Your lips pull further up, and Jaime swallows while staring at your lips.

"You didn't lose your voice?" He stumbles over himself as you blink.

"Not quite. It hurt for a bit, but my self-healing ability is quite impressive too. So?" You hum. "Can I?"

"Yeah, sure, mi vida," He mumbles, the helmet on his head coming off as he presses his lips to yours, lashes fluttering as your body arches to sink into him. His hand wraps around your wrist as he leans a little more in to get a better taste of your lips, another hand moving to the back of your head, tilting it as he stares at you through his lashes. He understands your nickname now, your lips do taste sweet, even when you haven't downed whipped cream. Ugh, he could spend eternity just making out with you, slowly, gently, without a care in the world. He pulls gently on your hair, leaning further in as he licks your bottom lip, exhaling more as his tongue darts past your pretty lips into your mouth. Your hand moves to press on his chest, whimpering as he tugs on your hair a little too hard.

You're just so pretty to him.

He lets out a sigh of satisfaction as you pull away for air, lips parted, eyes glazed over, a strand of saliva connecting your mouths.

Jaime reaches to wipe the saliva from your mouth with his thumb, smiling gently as he does.

God. Shit. He's in love with you.

unusually high levels of dopamine and adrenaline detected in bloodstream. quickened heartbeat warning.

"Can I kiss you again?" Jaime whispers.

"Yeah." You whisper back, smiling so hard your eyes crinkle.

Fingers in your hair and lips slotted against yours, Jaime thinks this is heaven for him. Even as the two of you have detransformed, still stuck on the roof of the dorms, your hands on his chest as he sinks further into your touch, smiling against your lips as you hum, the vibrations of your chest traveling to his as a pleasant buzz. Jaime closes his eyes all the way, and he only pulls away when you do, the gentle fondness still present in his eyes as he looks at you.

Yeah. That was what this is. Love.

The same love that was present in his mother's eyes, yet different from the love that was for his family. This love was newer— it made his skin crawl and his heart race, but it wasn't unpleasant. He felt giddy and boyish, falling for someone like this— he felt like it was having a first love, your cheeks flushed and ears red, shy glances stolen in a room full of people, only seeing you under the spotlight when other people existed. Jaime wanted to relish in this forever— the feeling of your skin pressed to his, he would stay with you forever if he could— If you'd let him.

"So?" You smile. "Know why now?"

Jaime pauses to stare at the way the sun shines through your hair and coats you in a glow of gold, his hands still on you as he looks up, a smile on his face. A laugh breaks past his lips at your smile, the happiness from finally having you in his arms sending blood through his body and genuine bliss through his system. Ah. Right. This was heaven to him— to have you in his arms and a smile on his face, the sun not even as bright as the way your eyes crinkle while looking at him, adoring him to the ends of the earth. Ah, it feels good to be loved.

"Mm..." Jaime hums playfully. "Maybe I'll know if you kiss me again."

"God, I think I just unleashed a monster."

"Your fault for being so irresistable, mi vida." He goes back to your lips, humming happily as he does.

Your relationship doesn't change much at first. The two of you are exclusive, yes, but neither of you have put a label on the relationship. Other than the making out in your dorm and occasionally while fighting, not much has really changed. You both have your classes, and you both have things that you are busy with. You wonder if you guys are just friends with benefits, then. Though, judging from the way Jaime looked at you, there was no way the guy thought you both were just friends.

Then, Jaime starts bringing food over to your dorm, clinging onto you while the two of you huddle on the couch with a movie playing in the background. You find yourself in his arms as you listen to his heartbeat at night, and suddenly the single dorm is a double, Jaime squished on your bed next to you, sprawled out with an arm around you lovingly as the two of you sleep. You're... definitely not friends with benefits. You're practically dating, huh?

"I'm here!" Jaime calls from the door, holding a bag of takeout with a bouquet in the other arm.

"What is it today?" You take the flowers from him with a smile.

"Bart visited today." He hums. "Said there was a good bagel place downtown he visited before."

"Ooh." You mumble. "Did you try it?"

"No, but I ordered something I figured you'd like." He takes out the boxes, sliding yours to you, smile on his face.

"Jaime, can I call you mi amor?" You tilt your head.

"You can call me whatever you want, mi vida." He hums. "Just you."

ew.

"Khaji, shush." He hisses at the beetle.

You open the takeout box, grinning at the bagel. "We should make this here."

"We should." He hums. "You'd probably make a better one too."

"Should have Bart judge it." You chew on the bagel, pausing. "Are we... dating?"

"Yeah. Why wouldn't we be?" Jaime pauses. "Oh. I forgot to ask you out, huh? Wait, I can prepare something nice and then as—"

"Jaime, go out with me?" You tilt your head, smile crinkling your eyes, your cheeks pulled upward with a foolish grin.

"Yes." he breathes. "Yes, mi vida. Forever and always, it's a yes."

You hum, pulling a flower out of the bouquet and tucking it behind his ear. "There. Now we're actually dating."

"Mi vida." He spins your chair to face him, arms gripping both sides, smile on his face. "Can I have a kiss?"

"For you? Always yes." You set the bagel down, wrapping your arms around his neck. "Though, I probably taste like bagel right now."

"You always taste good." Jaime mumbles, pressing his lips to yours.

And it's gentle, the way that Jaime loves. He presses his fingers into your skin and wraps his arms around you, relishing in the warmth you give him, and to him, you can do no wrong. Even if you make mistakes, he's there for you, slowly, gently, always there to anchor and weigh you down. You'll do the same for him, fingers threading through his hair, skin warm on his, a smile and voice reserved for him.

and god did Jaime love you for it.

[sematarygirls]

sonny carisi & sex: an embarrassing exposé on what i think about far too much in my free time.

                   ౨ৎ

sonny carisi's favorite sex position seems to be a divisive topic that i've thought about much myself, and by that, i mean, i made all of that up. i'm actually not sure what the general consensus on what sonny is and isn't into seems to be, but i am here to share my own thoughts and feelings on the topic.

i have done hours of extensive research (watching s16-22 of law and order svu and reading fanfic) and through that, i have determined one very simple fact: sonny is a missionary man, and no, i don't mean in the religious sense.

i believe that ultimately, for sonny, sex boils down to two things: love and intimacy. especially with his catholic upbringing where sex is sacred and a job where he sees violent sex acts every day. he doesn't want to come home and be reminded by the bad parts of human nature. he wants to be reminded of the closeness and the love that two people can share, that sex is supposed to be a fun and joyful thing.

with this in mind, i think that the closeness that missionary provides is the perfect amount of intimacy for a guy like sonny— the eye contact, the feel of his body over yours. he can watch you intently, see your reaction to his every move, guage when he's doing something you like, when he's doing something you don't.

along with that, i really like the idea that he has a little bit of a breeding kink (i hate that word, but my point stands). i think sonny loves kids and dreams of having a big family with you. that leg over the shoulder maneuver, while also great for heightening your pleasure, just so happens to be a great way to get pregnant, or so I've been told. i'm not exactly an expert on all things sex as much as i like to claim to be.

i think i've seen people say he would be fond of doggy, but i respectfully disagree with that idea. i think for him, it would seem too impersonal, almost degrading in a sense. there's not a lot of connection. there's no eye contact. he can't even see his most favorite part about you— your beautiful face. he can't see how it flushes or the way your eyes roll back or that bashful look when he calls you a "good girl" and says you're "doing so well" for him. i think if you enjoyed it, he wouldn't be opposed to it because he just wants to make you happy, but it's far from one of his favorites.

i do think he enjoys you riding him. it has all of the same benefits of missionary, except you're on top. he loves seeing that new angle of you. the way your head falls back, lips parted in pleasure as you set the pace and take control. it does something to him, but ultimately, after a long and stressful day at work, nothing is better than hovering over you and planting kisses over every inch of skin that he can reach while murmuring all about how much he loves you and how you're the perfect girl for him, and that's what makes missionary soar leagues above any other position to him.

[meeludrawz]

hi i love your writing! can you do tomura shigaraki trying desperately to cook or plan a cute date night in for someone he likes?? thanks!

Weeee!! :D I was excited to write that one! :3 Content: Fluff, Comfort <3 Warnings: Mention of blood

Perfect - Shigaraki x Reader

He was sweating bullets, he had been trying to prepare something special for the both of you but the league kept entering the motherfucking kitchen to grab snacks and wouldn't leave because it was 'funny to mess with him'.

At least that's what he was thinking, in reality, they weren't doing anything to stress him. He just didn't know how to deal with this. Usually, he or you'd plan an outing, sometimes Kurogiri would cook or you'd get takeouts.

This time though, he really wanted to plan everything from A to Z, including cooking.

Dabi had stopped in the kitchen's doorframe, a raised eyebrow. This was literally the first time that he'd step in the kitchen since Shigaraki had started planning for tonight. "Geez boss, I knew you hated me but no need to act like that"

The white haired mand didn't even look up at him, his bangs hiding his eyes. He kept scratching his neck, staring at the recipe. It shouldn't be that hard, right? "Go away" He mumbled.

He could see, from the side of his vision that Dabi rolled his eyes and walked away before coming back 2 seconds later. "Okay, the fuck's the problem?"

"Nothing, everything's fine" Tomura spat out of his mouth like it was venom.

"Uh huh" Touya clearly seemed to not believe him.

Tomura took a deep breath and finally looked at his friend, associate, colleague…, employee? He still wasn't sure what to call Dabi. "Fuck off, I'm fine"

"Sure, whatever but you should patch up your neck before that ruins your date" The scarred man disappeared in the hallway.

Tomura blinked then looked at his fingers. Fuck. There was some blood under his fingernails. He had scratched too much without even noticing.

This wasn't going well.

A few minutes later, he was back in the kitchen, hands cleaned, he had washed them at least thrice to make sure of it, and bandages were wrapped around his neck.

Okay, well, maybe it wasn't so bad. It's not like he had lost an arm while cooking, right?

He followed the recipe as much as he could. Tomura swore at it, multiple times as he had to google some terms that he couldn't understand. He almost used his quirk twice out of spite but didn't. He had to do it. For you.

But something went wrong, he didn't know what, but smoke was coming from the oven. "FUCK" He stuck his head out in the hallway, looking for something.

But of course, living in an abandoned place, there wasn't any fire extinguisher. The smell of smoke quickly invaded their whole lair, the other league members started showing up, lowkey panicking. Except Dabi.

Luck must've been on his side because you, Sako and Kurogiri warped into the kitchen a few seconds later. The purple mist man quickly warped the oven to some unknown place.

Sako and Kurogiri urged the league to open every window so the smoke could escape, while also leaving you two in the kitchen.

The look you had on your face, that worry, he couldn't handle it at the moment so he avoided your gaze.

You approached him and gently grabbed his wrist. He silently followed you as you brought him on the roof. He helped you climb due to your tight clothes stopping you from doing some movements. He also was wearing something nice.. Well now it was ruined due to the ashes.

You both sat down and leaned against each other. "Sorry"

"For what?" You gently asked.

"I burnt our dinner"

You smiled softly. "It's okay, as long as you're not hurt"

Tomura groaned and you looked up at him. "No it's not, I was trying to do something special for you and it just didn't fucking work." Tomura wasn't the type to curse unless he was pissed, like now. He spotted that frown forming in your face and his state worsened.

"Tenko, it's fine, I promise, I really appreciate-"

God, he loved it when you called him by his real name. He almost forgot why he was angry for a split second. "You don't get it" He interrupted you. "I wanted this to be perfect for you. It had to be something special that you'd remember"

Your frown switched to a confused expression. "Why?"

He snorted, he couldn't believe that you couldn't understand something so obvious. "You're genuine, funny, caring, kind.. You're even more than that.. But it's perfection to me"

"I'm not-" You started before he interrupted you again.

"Shut up, yes you are, even your little quirks and bad habits of yours… Somehow" He sighed and his scarlet hues finally met yours. "You deserved something perfect tonight" Tomura looked down. "But I ruined it.. Because I'm.."

A monster, was what he was trying to say. He didn't care about his looks, he really didn't. But on the inside? He was mean, cruel, a dangerous freak. And yet you still loved him. How? He didn't know but that's why you were so special to him, that he loved you back.

You didn't need him to finish his sentence to understand what he was thinking about, and he loved that too about you.

"Tenko.. I don't care about what happens when we're having a date. I don't need fancy shit. We could legit have it in the sewers or in a trash container behind a crappy restaurant and I wouldn't care because you'd be with me. And as long as you're having a good time too, I couldn't care less about the rest" You grebbed his hand and he intertwined his fingers with yours. He was always wearing gloves nowadays, because he never knew when you'd grab his hands. So he was being extra careful.

Tomura snorted, 5 seconds ago and he thought he was the freak one but now you were saying that a date in the sewers was okay. "You're weird, we should discuss about those strange date ideas of yours"

You hit his shoulder with no strength in it and he laughed. "Those were examples!"

The young man snatched your wrist before you'd "hit" him again. "I know and I get it now"

You smiled softly and he dropped your wrist before reaching for the side of your face. "I love you" You whispered gently.

And he could've melted right here and there but he smiled back. "Love you to the stars and back"

You snorted, he had done that cheesy line on purpose, just to hear you laugh. Because you knew he disliked the lovey dovey speeches. "Look at you being cheesy"

"What can I say? I'm a romantic"

Your laughs echoed through the calm night that the only light was the moon and stars.

{Yeah, nevermind} He thought. {This is perfect}

When you can't properly gradient the sentences because of Tumblr's character limit per blocks 😭😭😭

[onsunnyside]

ok so i've been trying to come up with a mafia trope for this ask by the bestie @bimbofawn: now this isn't a full-blown mob fic, but it has a few elements

The Camerons have all the wealth, influence and success anyone can dream of. They come from a long lineage of fame and riches, now running the parent company of many subsidiaries with power all across the country. It's no surprise they're involved in a few shady businesses, yet it's all kept tightly under wraps.

As the heir to a vast dynasty, Rafe grew up under a lot of pressure to be the best in what he does, and his ego is proof of that. He's in the tabloids, the ivy league graduate by day and the wild bachelor by night, landing himself in more scandals than ass-kissing articles.

The Camerons are known for their prestige and (heavily manufactured) picture-perfect image. So Rafe's sleazy, immature behaviour just won't do. Although he's doing good with the shady side of the family business (bc ofc he's into violence and drug trafficking/manufacturing), he needs to do better with the public side. To give his son a motive for cleaning up his act, he gives him an ultimatum: lose it all and get disowned or settle down.

Now, he has a few months to find someone, but his ego won't let him settle for just anyone. The headlines aren't any comfort either: Pleasure Over Business: Is Rafe Cameron responsible for the fall of the Cameron dynasty?

This is very off-to-the-races coded: you drift into his sector on his friend's arm one night. He shrugs you off, expecting there to be a different girl the next time they go to the clubs (because there always is) but nope, you show up again and again.

It’s hard for him to ignore someone so kindhearted and naturally alluring. He can’t look away from you sipping on the straw, your calm gaze locked on his, making him stumble over his words like a teenager with a crush. He dreams of you every time he falls asleep, your pretty face burned on the inside of his eyelids as if you belonged there.

But one night his friend shows up with a different girl.

"Her rates got too high, and my folks were getting suspicious so I had to let her go, unfortunately." He exhales, his arm around the other woman kissing up his neck.

Now, did he predict you were an escort? Not at all. It catches him off guard and he almost spits up his drink. "You paid her to date you?"

Topper glares, "you don't have to say it like that. We did more than just make appearances together if that's what you're asking. All consensual, of course, but you do have to pay extra for private um... sessions."

me senses... a sugar-baby proposition: "I'll take care of everything, all expenses, your rent, and an allowance on top of that. Anything you want you can have."

You're still apprehensive, you've taken clients who've heard of you from word of mouth before, but this was new. They were best friends who routinely saw each other, you'd hate to stir the pot. "Won't it be weird?"

"You with Top was just business and so is what I'm offering." Perhaps that was a little white lie, but you didn't need to know that. "No harm, no foul. In my hands, you could live better than this."

"I like my home." You mutter, hugging a pillow to your chest, it was one of the many mismatched cushions that littered your old couch. "I worked hard to get it this way."

He nudges the wobbly table by the door, the picture frames rattling on the surface. "For thousands of dollars a night, I would've expected some sense of luxury, or a stove with actual knobs." He says and quirks a brow, "where'd all that money go?"

"Oh... I had to give my boss his cut."

"How much is that?"

"80 percent." You admit, ducking away when Rafe frowns, "I know, I know... It wasn't my fault, my daddy—" Your voice cracks, "My daddy got involved with a bad man after he gambled away all our savings and my college fund. And he still couldn't stop after my mama left. I had to—I had to help somehow."

You still remember returning from campus to see him bruised and battered on the living room floor, crying for your mother who was halfway across the world, now a happily divorced woman. The memory brings tears to your eyes and they stream down your cheeks.

Rafe bites his tongue, rethinking his decision to show up here in the first place. Your unlucky life only made you more perfect, and as terrible as it sounded, he knows he won't find anyone more fitting for his circumstances.

He refused to leave until you agreed.

"What's his name?"

You don't hear him over your sniffles and rub your nose into your pillow, "huh?"

He crouches by your feet, placing a hand on your thigh. "What's the big bad man's name, sweetie?"

"Why—Why are you asking..."

The blue in his eyes seems darker, but it could just be the dim lightbulbs you haven’t changed yet. He blinks up at you with thick lashes, a slow smile crawling onto his face.

"I'm going to prove to you that when you're with me, you've got nothing to worry about."

And the next night, he shows up at your door with a fresh bouquet of flowers and bruised knuckles. You don’t get one word out before drops a heavy duffel bag on the floor, “here’s the money you deserve for your work, and extra for your troubles.”

You glance at the bag and then his face, your toothbrush hanging out of your mouth. “What—What did you do?”

He smiles, cocking his head to the side. “Nothing you have to worry about, sweetheart.” He says, wiping toothpaste from the corner of your lip. “Now, are you going to invite me in?”

Rafe is very possessive, he doesn’t care that you dated/slept with his friend because you belong to him now. He buys you a gold necklace with his initial on it, parades you around the city for all the nosy paps to see, and brings you home to meet his family. And yes, you do get the gold seal of approval from his father.

well this is just a mash-up of different tropes 🫡 fake relationship, sugar daddy and mob, with rafe's signature "you're mine" mindset. me has a few slutty and soft ideas for this au too hehe

[thatflatenedfrogontheroad]

I made a tier list...

please make your own!! I need to see boomer nations opinions on our man!!!! I know the tiers are actually so vile so change them if you desire :)))

OK so my quick blurb on why they are their!! (working worst to best)

28. Identity Crisis #5 - HE WOULD KILL ME FOR THE FUN OF IT. It did bring about the most random rivalry between Tim drake’s fandom and boomer's which is very funny

27. Black Lantern - Oh no… he's back… like a boomerang. Ate his own son... RIP…. L skill issue

26. Sliver Age - Would actually call me a slur and say that I don't deserve rights. He would hate crime me and then solicit me for sex. He looks like he's wearing a dress… what a pretty lady.

25. Flash TV Show - EWWWWWWWW, he though he ate...

24. DC Online - He looks like he would punch me in face at a NYC bus stop

23. White Lantern - Don't look at me like that… stop. He's back from the dead like a boomerang?? Something about most of the New 52 boomerangs don't hit the same. the bride all in white :’)

22. Young Justice - Gave me the ick. You might be thinking... he looks identical to SS hell to pay, why is he down here?? Great question… HE WAS SO CREEPY TO ONE OF THE GIRLS IN YOUNG JUSTICE….. WHO IS A MINOR!

21. Injustice Movie - Just because your in the background… doesn't save you from this list!!!

20. New 52 - Ok he's kinda hot if you look through your peripherals…Why are you wearing skinny jeans… you millennial

19. Harley Quinn TV Show - He's fine… just fine. “We’ll stack out bingo… Boomer loves an older woman” NO HE MUST LOVE ME! I AM VERY VERY MATURE FOR MY AGE

18. Flash: Sins of the Father - Can you please stop talking in the 3rd person… you are starting to sound crazy.

17. Most Wanted - I know jack shit about him. That's probably because he is barely in a comic issues THATS NAMED AFTER HIM!

16. Flash Point Paradox - His fight scene actually ate. I'm a sucker for Boomer being with the Rogues. If cyborg can take his belt off… so can I

15. Suicide Squad 2021 - Wow they somehow gave him even less lines than his first movie. 1. He doesnt look like boomer. 2. His accent is so bad… and hes AUSTRALIAN 3. His acting low key kinda mid 4. They killed off two of the only OG suicide squad members they had on the cast 5. He dies in the first 20min and in the most disrespectful way

14. Suicide Squad 2016 - The only good thing to come from this man is the fanfiction he brought. THIS FUCKING MOVIE MADE HIM A CANON BRONY WHICH I CAN NOT FORGIVE. GET THIS OUT OF MY SMUT BEFORE FREAK THE FUCK OUT >:( Fuck him and pinky too, you son of a bitch!!!! (its not that serious lol... i just want him to stop fucking a toy horse... please guys)

13. This Goober Alien Guy - I know nothing. He just kinda showed up… and I'm not mad just a little confused. He looks like he needs a hot chocolate and a hug :)))) 

12. Lego Batman Movie - Low key an icon. What I would do to get my hands on one of these sets… I would come close to killing someone for it

11. DC Lego Super Villains - If he wasn't Lego I would propose (Shane Dawson style) Once again what I would do for the very discontinued Lego set tie in…

10. Batman: Brave and The Bold - Those cheekbones could cut someone. Why are you wear a mini skirt… take it off ;)

9. Suicide Squad (comic) - Yes I know he was drinking and driving but he's not real so it doesn't count!!! The beginning of the Boomer Mobile! THE GAP TOOTH DUDE!

8. Justice League Unlimited S1 - AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Ok the hairline is… bad…. But so is mine twin!! I LOVE THAT THEY GAVE HIM PROPER CLOTHES AND NOT RAGS DUDE

7. Agent of Oz - is this picture is my school profile pic...yes… and??HE'S COVERED IN BLOOD AND IM GIGGLING!!!!!!!!!!!

6. Stjepan Sejic's Boomer - Choke hold and choke me...  I want to hear his voice but he can't break his mewing streak…The ungodly things I would let him do to me

5. Dark: Apocalypse War - Constantine! Boomer! GIRLS! GIRLS!! ILL SLEEP WITH BOTH OF YOU!!! I was not expecting him in this movie so I started to freak out when he showed up DUDE. PLEASE LET ME SIT ON IT

4. Suicide Squad: Hell to Pay - I'm a ride he wouldn't survive… I DONT HAVE WORDS TO DECRIBE HOW I FEEL DUDE… I WOULD DO ANYTHING HE ASKED FOR NO JOKE. Dead on the floor

3. Justice League Unlimited S2 - The glow up in REAL... had me on my hands and knees as a 3rd grader… and still on my knees today. I have never wanted someone to fuck me in the back alleyway of a shit bar so bad in my life

2. Batman: Assault on Arkham - The one that started it all… he is the reason I am this way. no lube, no protection, all night, all day, from the kitchen floor to the toilet seat, from the dining table to the bedroom BUT GREG ELLIS IS PUBLIC ENIME NUMDER ONE. YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID!!!!

AND THE BEST ONE!!!!!!!! WE ALL SAW IT COMING

1. Suicide Squad: Kill the Justice League - I AM GNAWING ON THE IRON BARS OF MY ENCLOSURE!!!!!! He has it all, the face, the VOICE, the look, the character!!!!! It is hands down the most consistently good representation of captain boomerang out their… and its canon that's he has a big dick :D I would sell my first born to get one night…

Thank you all for reading this word vom, I am sick in the head <3

if any of the comic issues are off or something please let me know :)

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE make your our and tag me!! i need to see them <3<3<3

[princesayumi4k]

SFW = Blue NFSW = Red

He's definitely more insecure than people see him as. Sure, he has this whole "I'm a evil villain" mentality/attitude...but he's actually quite sensitive and fearful about how others perceive him.

He has a poor diet.

He prefers cats over dogs, but would prefer bunnies over any other animal - just because he thinks he's allergic to cats.

He is fully Japanese, but isn't a very good formal speaker in the language - he mostly uses slang.

He is an amazing gamer...literally loves League of Legends with his heart.

Mommy issues mf - loves sucking your titties (if you're a girl) or just fondling them in general.

A lot of people would say the opposite, but he's a sub. He doesn't know what the hell he's doing, but still wants you to be pleasured so he lets you take control.

He doesn't have a low sex drive, which makes him a lot more horny around his s/o especially when he gets the chance. You could look at him in a certain way and he'd immediately pop a boner.

I know I said he has a poor diet, which makes his seed hard to swallow, it's more sour and salty rather than what you picture sperm to taste like.

He jerks off actually more than you would think. Sure, he's a scary villain, but he doesn't really care, he'll be laying there with you and then just pop it out and stroke it - he doesn't really care if you want to help or not.

I don't feel like he scream-moans or anything, but he's definitely a whimperer. You can lay a finger on his peen and he will let out a tiny whimper - sometimes he will jerk his body back and start shaking with a heavy breath.

In my opinion, I feel like Tomura is straight, and I'm not trying to be rude - I just feel like he prefers to be dominated by a woman.

He doesn't care if someone walks in or even teases. If someone asks if you've ever done it with him he will go straight into detail - slightly not being able to tell that what he is saying is completely tmi.

He actually doesn't like to go slow, he wants to go rough and will spit out insults and praise at the same time while you ride him or suck him off.

He doesn't like being dom often, but will voluntarily give oral. He could fall asleep if you let him.

A bad thing about him is he wants to do it anywhere and everywhere - he doesn't like quickies but if you need to pull one he doesn't mind.

He LOVES receiving hickeys, but does a sloppy job at giving them to his s/o.

The amount of dirty talk this man will give, oh my god.

Has a love/hate relationship with PDA. He doesn't want others to look at them and start shit, or look at you and imagine themselves with you, so he prefers to only sometimes flaunt you in public - he doesn't mind holding pinkies or index fingers though.

He has to wear his gloves during sex which he hates with a passion. He wants to spank you, he wants to whisper how much of a slut you are while you ride him - but his glove muffles the ass slapping and he HATES that.

He doesn't call you a lot of pet names other than dirty ones - but that's only in bed. Usually he calls you "mine", "dear", "love" and occasionally says "darling" to make you blush.

The dirty names he calls you are "slut", "bitch" and "cumslut" but he refuses to call you a whore or anything to call you nasty/dirty

Jealous Tomura is a whole different ride. He will be calm with you and once he gets jealous he will find the closest wall, bed or couch - even a counter and start making out with you, telling you to shut up. He does feel bad after though, he will just eat you out and he prefer to do it with you standing up so when you reach your high, he can watch your legs shake - and also he can smack your ass.

He isn't the best at aftercare, especially since he cries first - yes. He cries as soon as he shoots his seed inside you. But he will clean you up and kiss you once he calms down, he will even sleep with you (like actually rest) after.

He doesn't send nudes a lot, he always complains that the light is too low or he can't get the right angle, but will send a jerking off video if you ask.

He loves loves loves you with all his heart, so he will cook for you if you ask - even though he can only good pizza, noodles and mac and cheese. They are very good though.

DICK SIZE? He hates his dick size, even though it's huge for his age. A good, whopping 9.5 inches when erect, about 8.0 when flaccid.

[niiwa-angel]

I absolutely LOVE the fact that Bruce and Ollie HATE their best friends spouses. Oliver cannot stand Barry while Bruce Bat-Glares at Hal whenever they're in the same room. Leading up to the wedding, Ollie and Bruce who are both their buddies respective best man, are trying to convince their friend to leave.

Ollie throws Hal a bachelor party with exclusively blonde entertainment. Male and female. The bartenders are all blondes. He's hoping that Hal will find literally ANY other blonde to shack up with, as long as he doesnt have to deal with BARRY FUCKING ALLEN.

Bruce tries a different, slightly classier, slightly less legal means if breaking them up. Bribery. He approaches Hal after a League meeting and pulls him aside.

Bruce: fifty thousand right now, in your pocket, if you break up with Barry.

Hal, dumb as fuck bless his soul: Why would I break up with Barry for fifty thousand dollars?

Clark and Dinah are both annoyed at their partners for being so immature. Bruce is ready to break his no kill rule just to get Hal away from his mystery movie marathon buddy and Clark intercepts all of his plans.

Bruce: People die of food poisoning all the time, nobody would think twice.

Clark: If you kill Barry's soulmate with bad chicken, I will sic the entire Daily Planet investigative journalist team on you. No secret Bruce Wayne has ever had will be safe.

Bruce:😠

Ollie tries getting Hal to leave Barry.

Ollie: Are you sure you want to Marry BARRY of all people? He's bossy, he's a shut in, he's-

Dinah, fed the fuck up: He's smart, he's got a good career, he understands that being green lantern takes up a lot of your time, he's cute.

Hal: I know, he's so amazing 😍

Ollie, trying not to barf: 🤢

The day of the wedding they both dial it up to eleven. Bruce is in Barry's space helping him get ready but the whole time he's very supportive of the idea of leaving.

Bruce: I'm just saying, there is NOTHING wrong with not being sure, if you need more time to think, we can leave right now. I'll have Alfred drive us to the airport right now and we'll go eat our way through Europe, no questions asked.

Alfred, who is very much looking forward to this wedding: No I will not.

Jay, about to walk Barry down the aisle:😡

After they get through the wedding and have been together for a while, Bruce still kinda pushes for a break up.

Clark: Barry's birthday is coming up, what are you getting him?

Bruce, not looking up from his newspaper: a divorce attorney.

Alfred, reaching over and smacking him.

Bruce, after a long suffering sigh: and a new microscope for his lab. He's been wanting one.

Then Wally comes along and all attempts stop because Bruce and Ollie are not going to be the ones to break up a family.

[starwarsmum]

Maribat Mix Match Monster Mash day 6, I'll Kill You Either Way & Shadow

Marinette was part of a group of older magic users. She had been working with the Justice League Dark on and off for the past couple of years, ever since she had turned nineteen. She was by far the youngest member, but that didn't mean she was the weakest. 

In fact, she was well known as one of the powerhouses of the magical world, all because she was the conduit of Creation. She had had quite a difficult time juggling the various duties that came with being a recognised and respected magic wielder alongside her separate and growing reputation as a fashion designer. 

“Hey LB, we got a request from the bat crew to take a look at a problem they're having,” Zatanna said, appearing seemingly out of nowhere. “Are you free?”

“Yeah, just give me…one…minute…okay, yes, I'm done,” Marinette said, closing the book she was reading with a flourish and turning to face the older magic user. “Who's having a problem with what now?”

“Apparently one of Batman’s crew is having a problem with Spectre, and they need one of us to help out,” she replied, talking too casually. Marinette was instantly wary and gave Zatanna a hard look. The woman gave her a wince in return and her shoulders slumped slightly. “Look, they need one of us and you're the newest and one of our most effective magic wielders.”

“So I'm getting to deal with the bats - who hate magic wielders - because I don't have a history with them?” She tugged anxiously on a pigtail, worrying her lil between her teeth. “Why am I getting punished for being new?”

“No, I know, but honestly can you see Constantine trying to help them? Besides, the Bat in question is the youngest and we thought you'd relate better with him, given your own age.”

“...this is about Stabby? And you said Spectre, isn't he in the business of universal balance?” Marinette was beyond curious now, and confused when Zatanna nodded. “Okay, so you want me to go against someone who has the balance of the universe as his guide for the most violent Robin we've ever had because…?”

“Because he's not a bad person. When he was a kid, he lived with bad people that taught and trained him to do bad things, but he's grown since then,” Zatanna said, sounding passionate and earnest. Marinette could feel her resistance crumbling and sighed before relenting. 

“Okay, fine, but they start getting fussy about the whole magic thing and I'm lodging a complaint,” she said sternly. “When are the bats expecting me to meet with them?”

“Er, as soon as possible? They've sequestered Señor Stabby on the Watchtower, so as soon as you're ready we'll head on up.”

_ _ _

Marinette could count on one hand the number of times she had been on the Watchtower before now and none of them had been happy times. Every time, it had been one of the innumerable bats who had made her regret attending, blatantly annoyed that they didn't have her identity. 

So she was disgruntled to be back, and to help them no less. The only reason she hadn't outright refused was because the latest Robin had been semi-respectful of her wishes and always admonished the others when possible. Well, not Batman, but anyone else? He would shut down the invasive questions if he was in earshot.

Really, if it hadn't been for his harsh demeanour she would have wanted to befriend the young man. But he had been blunt and dismissive of her as a hero, even as he respected her privacy. Whenever he had accidentally complimented her - and it was obviously never done on purpose - he followed it up with a cutting remark about her shortcomings.

Stepping into the meeting room after Zatanna, Marinette gave a weak smile that probably came across as a grimace. She was still short enough that people didn't automatically notice her when she walked in behind someone else, in spite of the spandex suit. But the moment the big bad Bat himself noticed her he started objecting.

“Zatanna, what is Ladybug doing here? I thought you were aware of how grave a situation this was,” he said in his growling voice. Marinette coughed to cover up the snort that escaped her at his almost pun. It didn't go unnoticed. “She isn't even taking this seriously!”

“Oh come on, you cannot say things like ‘grave’ when we are discussing the Spectre and not expect someone to find the humour,” she insisted, feeling justified when the blue one, Nightwing, gave a stressed giggle. “See? But if you do not wish for my assistance, I understand and will be on my way.”

“Tt, that is not necessary,” Robin said, glaring at Batman in warning. “I apologise on behalf of my father, he is concerned for my well-being and it makes him unnecessarily combative.”

“...father?” Marinette was stunned and trying to maintain some semblance of calm as Batman gave Robin an exasperated look. Putting a pin in that, Marinette tried to regain a professional air. “Okay, whatever, I don't even want to try and unpack all of that. If you want my assistance I'm more than willing under the condition that nobody attempts to uncover my identity as a result of said help.”

“You would put your conditions ahead of the safety of another vigilante?” Red Robin said, clearly thinking it was a smart observation. Marinette merely raised an eyebrow which was, sadly, hidden behind her mask.

“You would put your curiosity ahead of the safety of your teammate?” she shot back, cocking a hand onto her hip and waiting as the young man flushed. “Yes, I am putting my safety first because believe it or not, I value my life, not to mention valuing the safety of the magic within my purview. If you want my help, you will follow my rules or face consequences.”

A short silence followed her statement but the bats eventually agreed. She listened carefully as they outlined the problem they were facing and Marinette grew more concerned the longer they spoke. She had heard of Spectre and knew that he was relatively single minded in his quest for justice.

Finally, they all agreed that Marinette and Robin would be holing up in a flat in Gotham until the threat was neutralised. While the idea of living with the youngest of the Gotham vigilantes filled her with anxiety, she was determined to help. Besides, she knew Zatanna had a couple of tricks up her sleeve that could help protect her identity.

_ _ _

“Thank you, for agreeing to help me,” Robin said as they set up the kitchen. Marinette made a non-committal grunt as she stowed different ingredients in their cupboards and refrigerator. They had portalled in as Pegabug and Robin from the WatchTower, and Marinette was making trips back and forth from her home in Paris.

When she was finally done, she turned to face Robin to lay some ground rules. So she was more than a little surprised when she faced him and he was missing his mask. She flushed as she got caught in the most beautiful green eyes she had ever seen.

“I thought it would be expedient to get this over with,” he said after an awkward silence. 

“Right, of course,” she said, tearing her gaze away. Calling for her detransformation, she felt the wash of magic as it rolled away from her. She held out a hand to him and tried to will calm into her voice. “You can call me Bridgette, if you want.”

Damian relaxed slightly as he took in the young woman before him. She was short, with mousy brown hair and hazel eyes. She looked to be of Indian descent and was looking at him nervously. He felt an absurd amount of relief that she was not as appealing to him now that she did not have gorgeous wide blue eyes, and black hair that gleamed blue in certain lights. He was unsure how he would have handled the close quarters with Ladybug if she had been as attractive as a civilian.

“You may call me Damian,” he answered. “I assume we will be able to stay relatively separate during our stay here, but in case it is relevant, I am a vegetarian.”

“Oh, cool, that's good to know,” Bridgette said, her voice a lot lower than it was as Ladybug.

Over the next couple of days, Damian and Bridgette settled into a comfortable routine. Bridgette would go out in her civilian form to get food and other household necessities, and Damian remained inside at all hours of the day. Whenever she was gone, he found himself more on edge, suspicious of every dark corner and empty room.

It was very domestic, and frustrating for Damian, but he had to admit that he didn't dislike her company. All of the qualities that he admired in Ladybug shone through, and he found that he gravitated towards her. She would ask him questions about why Spectre was after him, and make plans to help capture their adversary so that she could keep him safe.

On the third day of containment, Bridgette mentioned that they should probably make a plan for if Spectre found them in their temporary abode. As she discussed an evacuation plan which involved him using Kaalki - a miniature horse that powered the Miraculous of teleportation - a small red bug-thing floated in Bridgette's face.

“Guardian, is it really wise of you to share so much information with him?” The tiny thing squeaked, and Damian had to work very hard not to jump. Bridgette gave the creature assurances, although Damian wasn't sure what he had done to earn her trust.

At their shared meal that evening Bridgette mentioned that she would need to leave the following afternoon, and gave him a phone number to contact her on if something happened whilst she was away. 

_ _ _

On the day after her trip back to Paris for a fashion show, Marinette felt like she was drained both physically and mentally. The amulet that changed her appearance and voice used her own powers to fuel it. She needed to end the threat of Spectre before it went too far and she ended up a liability instead of a help.

“What do you think to showing up somewhere you're supposed to be as a civilian to draw him out,” Marinette asked while they were watching television. She tried to force down a blush when he turned and looked at her, cursing his attractiveness. “Because I don't know about you, but I have real life things to be doing. And as lovely as this has been, it's not really sustainable long term.”

“This has been enjoyable for you as well?” Damian asked, head tilting slightly. He had a pleased look on his face and she bit her lip to stop herself from agreeing too fervently. “I can see the point of it, we would just need to be cautious of any civilians becoming involved.”

They quickly discussed all of the places Damian was supposed to be in the next couple of days and settled on his work at an animal shelter as being least likely to have collateral damage. That meant they had twenty-six hours to make the plan as foolproof as possible, and Marinette was determined to get this right.

_ _ _

Watching Damian interact with the animals at the shelter was the last straw. Marinette could handle his polite manner. She could handle the respectful way he managed their close quarters. She could just about handle the admiration she could hear in his voice when they were discussing strategies.

But this green-eyed, tall, muscled man, who happened to be her age, talking softly to a blind dog so he didn't spook it? Letting it sniff his hand and lean into it so he could pet it? The way he calmed down animals before giving them necessary medications and comforting them afterwards? It was too much and she had to admit - to herself, no-one else - that he was perfect.

She felt guilt gnawing at her insides for deceiving him with Zatanna’s amulet, but she sure as hell hadn't wanted to give him her identity up front. But now…if the mess with Spectre got straightened out, she could see herself pursuing something more with this man.

About two hours into the night shift that Damian was taking, Spectre appeared. Marinette felt when the man entered the shelter and called for her transformation. She shoved Kaalki at Damian and made him transform as well. 

“You cannot hide him from me,” came a deep voice, and Marinette swung around to keep herself between the two. “Damian Al Ghul-Wayne’s crimes are numerous and I will kill him either way. He must pay for the crimes he has committed in his youth.”

“You're not touching him while I'm here,” she snarled back at him, swinging her yoyo in a wide arc. “Damian may have committed crimes in his youth, but he is not that person anymore. And it is my understanding that he was led astray by others during that time. We cannot punish the man for a child's mistakes when they were forced upon him by his guardians.”

“He is a murderer,” Spectre rumbled, his hood obscuring his eyes as Marinette stared at him. “He is an assassin and ended the lives of many with no remorse.”

“He is remorseful,” Marinette declared. “Damian Al Ghul-Wayne is a changed man, I swear it upon my own honour as Ladybug, superheroine of Paris and Guardian of the Miraculous.”

“You would forfeit your own soul alongside his, should he fail?” The sentence cut through her but she refused to waver. When she nodded, Spectre paused before withdrawing slightly. “Very well. I shall be monitoring you, Damian Al Ghul-Wayne, and if you should return to your previous nature, both yours and Ladybug's lives are forfeit.”

_ _ _

“Well that was a little anticlimactic,” Marinette said once they were safely back in their shared apartment the next morning. “I thought there would be a fight, or something. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad we don't have to take on someone so powerful, but it almost feels like it was too easy.”

“You think it a light measure that you have bound your fate to mine?” Damian asked, eyebrows raised. 

“Well it's not like you're going to go out and turn to a life of crime now, is it?” She retorted, rolling her eyes. They were sitting together on the sofa they had shared for the past week. “Just keep doing your thing and we'll be fine.”

He paused before leaning towards her and speaking in a low voice. “Perhaps we should…continue to spend time together. So that you can be sure that I do not cross any lines.”

Heat tingled up her spine as she also leaned forward, their breath mingling. She wasn't sure who closed the distance but their lips met in a soft kiss. It was gentle and warm, not dispassionate but nor was it a searing kiss.

When they pulled apart, her eyes fluttered open again, almost immediately getting caught by his green ones. He moved in once more but she pressed her forefinger to his lips to make him pause.

“Before we go any further, I have to-”

“Ladybug, wait!” Marinette jumped as Tikki streaked into the room, looking at her Kwami bewilderedly. Damian looked annoyed but not angry. “You should leave your amulet in place, guardian, he has been tricking you.”

“What do you mean-”

There was a banging on the door and Marinette looked at it, confused. Hardly anyone knew who lived in this apartment, and nobody from Marinette's life. Damian tensed further when they heard a familiar growling voice demand to be let in.

“Hello, Batman, to what do I owe this…pleasure?” Marinette asked, anxiety and worry building in her gut. The feeling strengthened when he didn't seem surprised by her appearance.

“They were spying on you, Ladybug,” Tikki said immediately, holding out a tiny electronic device. Marinette took it, a cold spreading through her as she turned it in her hands. “That device was embedded in the door. I apologise that I did not find it sooner, Guardian.”

“We put in safety measures to ensure that our teammate would remain unharmed,” Batman growled at Tikki. Marinette felt her hackles raise immediately, and she pinned Damian with a glare. “But since we are on the subject, what are you hiding that you needed to use magic to disguise your identity? There is nobody of your description ever having lived in Paris.”

“You thought I would take no precautions because you told me you wouldn't pry?” Marinette asked derisively as she strode towards the door, heart aching. She had thought that Damian had been sincere, that he was a good person. She had put her own soul in jeopardy to vouch for him and she squashed the bitter thought that she shouldn't have. “I hope that your curiosity was worth it, messieurs, do not ask me for favours in future.”

Damian watched Ladybug stalk out of the building and wanted to follow, to explain that he had had no part in this treachery. She stopped in the doorway to deliver her parting line and she looked directly at him. His breath caught at the utter betrayal in her eyes.

And then she was gone, the door closing heartbreakingly softly behind her. The apartment they had been sharing for the past week - had it only been a week? - instantly seemed duller without her. He finally turned to look at his family, all of whom were in some degree of panic.

“-walked out on this assignment, we should revoke her Justice League membership,” Tim was arguing. “And we'll need to have someone come and take over, move him to a more secure location-”

“We will deal with that momentarily, she knows our identities, she's a risk,” Bruce was saying, evidently frustrated with how this had played out. “We will all have to be in more secure locations in case she decides to share that information-”

“I am not at risk,” Damian said quietly. “Bri- Ladybug has already secured my safety and Spectre has been dealt with. You have destroyed any possibility of having her as an ally and you risked my own life to do it.”

“She would never have walked out on a job half-finished,” Dick said immediately. The others nodded in agreement, but Damian snarled at them.

“If that is the case then you had no reason to worry about finding her identity,” he hissed, anger getting the better of him. “Either she is trustworthy enough to have been allowed her privacy, or she is a dangerous anomaly and you risked my life to try and get information about her. You cannot have it both ways.”

Unable to bear the guilty looks of his family, nor the empty feeling that hollowed his gut, Damian stalked out of the apartment as well.

_ _ _

The past two months had been tense. And brutal. And Damian wasn't sure how he was supposed to return to his normal life after everything that had happened with and because of Ladybug. The relationship with his family was strained, although they were slowly building trust back.

A few days after everything had happened, Zatanna had stormed the Watchtower to speak with Batman. She had sworn and raged, ripping into the Justice League founder as she detailed exactly how badly they had messed up. His father had tried to defend his actions but Zatanna had coldly informed them that there was no need to find her identity any longer because Ladybug had resigned from the Justice League Dark.

“Two entire years of working with her, gaining her trust and getting her to agree that working with us was in the world's best interests, and you absolute boneheads screw us over in a week!” She screamed. “So thank you for that! You are damned lucky she resolved your issue with Spectre before she left, because I'm not sure I would bother!”

Looking back on the interaction hurt as he got ready for the annual Halloween gala. He had promised to attend on the premise that he would not need to attend another until Christmas, but he was regretting it today. There was supposed to be a family friend in attendance which was why Bruce had insisted he be there, for their public image.

The gala started much as it always did - loud and filled with obnoxious people. He saw a lot of the usual crowd and gave brief greetings as he worked his way to his favourite corner. It wasn't unusual for the youngest Wayne not to mingle and he was ever more grateful for his outward persona.

He scanned the crowd once more and saw his family chatting with a loud purple haired man who was practically hanging off of Bruce's arm. He grit his teeth before deciding that greeting the ‘old school friend’ of Bruce's would be best done sooner rather than later.

As he approached, he saw a stunningly attractive young woman standing next to the purple haired man. She looked bored, with an underlying discomfort or sadness that resonated within him. He watched as she was introduced to each of his brothers and sisters, her head nodding every now and then.

“Ah, and here's my youngest!” Bruce said with forced cheer. “Miss Dupain-Cheng, this is my son, Damian. Damian, this is my friend Jagged Stone and his niece, Marinette.”

“Good evening,” Damian said, trying to keep his voice cordial. This woman had no idea that he was angry with his family and she didn't deserve to have his anger directed at her.

Strangely, the moment he spoke she froze. He could see the tenseness in her shoulders before she turned to look at him, and she seemed to pale as she looked at his face. She whispered a quiet hello but turned around just as abruptly. 

Damian was confused by the dismissal but decided to take advantage, giving a curt farewell to his family and informing them that he would be leaving soon to get an early night.

Bruce frowned after Damian, already turning to apologise to his guests. Marinette seemed shaken by his rudeness and he didn't want to mortally offend her. “He doesn't socialise well normally, but he is a little miffed with us currently,” he explained, making sure to look appropriately charming and dejected.

“Oh no, mate, what happened?” Jagged said, sounding concerned. Marinette looked curious but also wary - for what reason, Bruce couldn't tell.

“We had a difference in opinion during a recent stalker issue,” Bruce said smoothly. “We had to hire an unknown bodyguard and to keep him safe we kept an eye on them. He decided that meant we didn't trust him, but honestly we're mostly just glad that he's still around to be mad at us.”

“I'm sorry, I must excuse myself,” Marinette said suddenly, giving them all a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes. Bruce nodded but she moved away from them hastily. Jagged watched her go with a furrow in his brow and Bruce asked if everything was alright.

“Yeah, I'm fine, just worried about Nettie,” the rockstar said. “She's been in a funk for a while now and I was hoping that coming out tonight would help.”

“Marinette will be fine,” Jagged's partner, Penny, said as she joined them. She gave Jagged a kiss on the cheek before continuing. “I'm pretty sure she's nursing a broken heart, you know what rotten luck she has with boyfriends.”

“But that's just it, she hasn't had a boyfriend since that whole thing with Henry!” The pair began to bicker and Bruce began to zone out from it.

Meanwhile Marinette was walking quickly after Damian. She had recognised him instantly, just the sound of his voice making her heart pound and mouth dry. When he had stormed off, she had been relieved, at least until Bruce (Batman, she thought absently) had jovially commented that Damian hadn't actually been a part of the complete violation of her trust.

She caught sight again of his broad shoulders at the bar. She slid next to him cautiously, ordering her own drink. He didn't seem startled when she appeared but he did seem curious. She turned and smiled at him nervously, more a quirk of her lips than a true smile.

“I believed that I had made a poor first impression,” he remarked after his drink arrived. She felt the butterflies in her stomach take flight again and stared at her hands, shrugging. “Apologies, I do not mean to be rude but…why did you follow me to the bar?”

“Maybe I just wanted to get a drink,” Marinette replied, daring to glance at him. She thanked the bar staff as her drink was handed to her and she turned fully towards the man who had so thoroughly enchanted her before. He looked at her sceptically and she chuckled drily. “Or maybe your father mentioned that you were mad at your family for something and it made me curious about your side of things.”

“Tt, my father should not have mentioned it,” Damian said, glaring at his own drink. Hope fluttered in Marinette's veins, her hands tightening around her glass. “My family is incapable of trusting my judgment and have destroyed my reputation with someone I care deeply for. They have earned my ire, even if they believe differently.”

“How did they destroy your reputation?” Marinette asked quietly, looking up at him and getting caught in the same green eyes that had been haunting her for the past two months. He seemed to hesitate so she motioned with her head for him to follow her. “Maybe we could step onto the balcony?”

Damian didn't know why he was talking to this woman. He didn't know why he was following her to the empty balcony, but he felt at ease with her. Perhaps it was because she had similar features to Ladybug, her blue eyes and dark hair making him ache in a familiar way.

“My father hired a security guard for a recent problem I had,” he said, wanting to present his side clinically. He wanted this woman to agree that he was right, that he hadn't overreacted to the absolute invasion of privacy. So he launched into a fairly precise recounting of the issue, only omitting the magical aspects.

“And the timing of the revelation meant that she believed me to be party to the deception,” he said hollowly. Marinette seemed to be shocked by the story and he regretted being quite so open with everything. He was ready to apologise for his forwardness when she blew out a breath.

“I mean, in my defense, you looked really guilty,” she said, grimacing. He frowned at her, not quite sure what she was saying. “And I was about to take the charm I was wearing off and tell you my actual name when Tikki stopped us.”

“...Ladybug?” He whispered, setting his glass on the balcony rail as he turned to look at her fully. She nodded and he felt like he was short-circuiting. She seemed to hesitate at his lack of reaction and he immediately grabbed her upper arms. She held still as he let his eyes sweep her face.

“Surprise? Sorry, I know you probably would have preferred I just stayed out of your-”

She was cut off by his mouth covering hers, his hand cupping her cheek almost possessively. She reached up to twine her arms around his neck, pulling herself flush against him. In between kisses, he murmured soft apologies, his other hand pressing firmly against her lower back.

They eventually broke apart, and Damian thanked whatever gods had made him choose the dark corner of the balcony for their conversation, because they were completely hidden from the ballroom. She looked up at him in the dark and he found himself memorising the lines of her face anew. 

A sudden loud noise from the ballroom made them both jump, though not enough to let go of each other. They edged towards the doorway of the balcony and relaxed when they realised it was just Jagged Stone starting a set for the gala.

“I thought I would never see you again,” Damian said softly, reaching for her again. 

“I mean, that was the plan,” she admitted begrudgingly. “And if I'd known who you were, I probably would have told Jagged I had to miss this party. But I'm really glad I came.”

“You didn't know who I was?” Damian asked, confused and a little stunned. “But Spectre gave you my full name, how could you not know who I was? Not to mention that I am fairly famous.”

“I mean, in Gotham, sure,” Marinette said teasingly, hand coming up to run through his hair. “But I'm from France? And I only really follow fashion, so you weren't familiar to me on sight.”

He fell quiet and leaned into her touch. His arms circled around her waist again and pulled her flush against him. He was slightly overwhelmed by the circumstances but relieved that he had found her again. She pulled lightly on his hair as her fingers ran through it and he sighed, content.

Part 2

[kimbapisnotsushi]

here have a medley of miscellaneous timeskip pro team headcanons bc WOW i haven't posted in a while and this is my only stress outlet other than binging new series <3333

starting off strong with ejp raijin LET'S GOOOOOO

washio 🫱🏼‍🫲🏼suna 🫱🏼‍🫲🏼komori: being EXHAUSTED from carrying the pro team world on their backs

no no i'm kidding. mostly

they keep a tally of other pro team matches in which their former teammates go up against each other and are REALLY smug if their respective teammate wins. which means you get shit like this

komori, cheerfully: "so how about that hornets v falcons game last night, huh?" suna: "oh shut UP tell iizuna tsukasa that aran-san could kick his ass any day of the week you little SHIT - "

they ARE united on the jackals front tho. all three of them want the adlers to go down HARD.

is suna nursing a grudge against ushijima from high school? yeah. is he ever going to get over it? probably not.

only komori feels bad bc he is fond of kageyama, but, hey, family's family

they ask washio why he hates the adlers and he looks them dead in the eyes and goes "hoshiumi kourai . . . he is a man that requires constant vigilance"

actually wait i know we all saw everyone watching and talking about the game (which makes me wanna cry SO bad) but god. how fucking funny would it be if players from monster gen convinced everyone else on their very professional and very mature teams to take sides

ejp raijin captain, who's been friends with hirugami fukurou for like ten years: "okay so explain to me again why we need to blow our entire team budget on jackals merch when we're not even going to the goddamn game?" komori: "well, it started on a cloudy but beautifully crisp spring day in 2012 - "

SPEAKING OF TACHIBANA RED FALCONS

hakuba joins the team, sees aran, and IMMEDIATELY starts texting the old kamomedai group chat

altho tbh i don't think there's no way that the "who-from-where-made-WHAT-pro-team" news never breaches the high school circuit. like come ON you know everyone's keeping up with the third year stars when they graduate

by the time the first years are third years they've got everyone pinned down on a fucking MAP. they have a shared file where they update each other on EVERYTHING. it's way less creepy than it sounds they're just a really passionate bunch okay!!!!

well that AND they can't help but brag about their amazing upperclassmen

okay sorry back to it. so it really goes more like

hakuba: "HOLY SHIT OJIRO ARAN FROM INARIZAKI IS HERE" suwa: "hakuba, we already knew that. i linked the article when it first dropped, remember?" hakuba: "yeah but it's still so WEIRD like it's OJIRO ARAN from INARIZAKI" hoshiumi: "lol atsumu told me he talks in his sleep, go find out if it's true"

aran actually does recognize hakuba mostly because gin paid him a compliment ONE (1) time and then aran had to listen to atsumu complain incessantly about the "stupid wall of muscle with stupid hair and his stupid height and stupid arms" ever since

ALSO. i think people get hakuba and hyakuzawa mixed up a lot. they've both got a similar height and build and hairstyle and play the same position

(not to mention the similar backstories)

it becomes a running joke throughout the pro leagues and makes for a fun time with falcons v warriors matches

in the event of a hyakuhina hookup (which i feel like actually could happen) they somehow get onto the topic of "haha it'd be even harder to tell them apart with your eyes closed!" and hinata, without thinking, goes "well, i probably could" and everyone is like "WHAT"

he digs himself an even deeper hole by saying "no, i just meant - i know hyakuzawa's body really well!!!" and everyone immediately starts screaming

poor hyakuzawa is dying on the inside

i think shibayama (MY BELOVED) kind of occasionally forgets that he also has his own fanbase and is sort of semi-famous as the libero of tokai heavy industries esperanza bc. he knows kenma and yaku and lev and komi and yamamoto and fukunaga and, in general, a bunch of people that he believes are much more well-known than he is

he's always so flattered whenever someone stops him in the street to ask for a pic or when he sees posts online gushing about him

this is extra funny bc he never talks about his friends like they're famous so all of his teammates don't really know that shibayama is friends with all these other famous people

and then one of them, an avid kodzuken fan, spams their group chat when kodzuken's newest video is released and shibayama shows up in it

they're like "SHIBAYAMA!! HOW COME YOU NEVER TOLD US THAT YOU'RE FRIENDS WITH KODZUKEN??" and shibayama is like "i have?? i talk about kenma-san all the time??" and they're like "YOU'RE TELLING ME KODZUKEN IS THE SAME KENMA-SAN WHO RIPPED HIS HIGH SCHOOL JERSEY TRYING TO JUMP OVER A FENCE???"

(shibayama's second year. they'd been dealing with things. it worked out, in the end. even if they had to lie to nekomata and naoki about why all their jerseys ended up with holes in them.)

i love the pro teams you guys they're so fucking funny

[pokemon-ash-aus]

Ash after going on vacation from streaming to go on an adventure, then dying and coming back three times during, coming back to streaming: "Y'all won't guess what happened AGAIN during this times vacation!"

(dunno why but I'd like to think that in any pokemon world where Ash Ketchum is a streamer he's told his followers and subs about his deaths. So like him dying during vacation happens so often that there is now an emote for when he says it and the emote is just him in the family guy death pose)

It's consenually assumed that Ash is fibbing the 'death' count and legendary count, No one is THAT unlucky.

Ash ends up being known as the Exaggerator among the streaming community. Cancel culture left and right to take him off the platform because he's lying. But everytime you send a hate mob, Ash shuts that shit down fast.

"Just cause you guys don't believe in me, doesn't mean im lying." He scowls one day in the middle of a CraftMines game (tm). "Fuck off and eat shit, I just wanna play games, train and tell you all stories."

The scowl on his face ends up being a reaction meme for awhile, usually followed by *The only time i cuss.*

I just imagine in Kalos, Right after the Yveltal situation, he streams directly after it. It's only his face, but you can hear the hustle and bustle of the hospital works.

"Alright, Who bet on this one being worse, Pay up cause wowzers."

And the chat floods with

Wowzers?

Did he say wowzers?

Dude what drugs are you on?

Yo, are you in a hospital??

Motherfucker said "wowzers" okay old man.

"I'm on Morphine, and i took a pretty bad hit to the head, excuse me for being lingolistic of the last century." And the camera tilts before he rights it, just as pikachu comes onto the screen, looking battered and bruised and a helluva lot more gray than before that's only barely receding. "Why did i do this again? Oh- i was gonna say im gonna take a break from streaming for a bit."

"Why did you stream to say that then?" A voice offscreen asks. "Why not like, send a Pidge?"

"It's actually called Z now." Ash quips back and his eyes are closed. You can see the bruises underneath his eyes. "probably should of- i dunno Clem my head hurts."

"Okay, say bye then."

"Bye then."

The stream doesnt end right away, Ash sort of doses off with Pikachu nestling on his neck. His fur is noticeablly less gray, but no one will figure that out until they compare

At First, there are skeptics all around. Loads of people calling it a publicity stunt cause - who the fuck streams in a hospital for crisis sake!!! Theres like a hate mob for awhile, and his numbers drop wildly.

Until a video comes out, it's clearly a bystander that shows the blurry images of a Pokemon. You can see the camera desperately trying to focus but it can't. You can also see it attacking groups of people, so the camera focuses on them.

You can hear Ash screaming for his pokemon, for Pikachu, before the video cuts out.

The numbers sky rocket, abd everyone desperately awaits for the next stream. Except the Kalos League hapens, and they're all left in the dark until Ash goes back home to Kanto. His arm is in a cast, his face is bruised along the left side of his jaw, and his nose has a plaster over it.

"So." He starts the stream, smiling brightly. "Trainers and Entertainers, guess whose not dead!"

And the stream skyrockets to one of the most viewed for the time.

I went wild but like- thinking on it, Streamer AU has got me. XD

[that1emowitch]

I NEED IDEAS FOR A JUSTICE LEAGUE HIGH SCHOOL AU!!!

Okay just imagine Bruce, Clark, Diana, Ollie, Hal, Barry, Dinah, Shiera, Carter, the Johns, Ray, Kyle, Guy—ALL OF THEM in the same high school, each of them just starting off as a hero. Except. The others don't know.

I'd imagine Bruce as the one guy everyone thinks is an emo kid (in canon he only became *Brucie* after coming back from Batman training). He doesn't talk to anyone except for these two smart kids Harvey Dent and Harleen Qunizel. But this one popular cheerleader (who's secretly a kleptomaniac), Selina, keeps trying to ask him out. Bruce, on the other hand? He's obsessed with becoming Batman, spends his time trying to find the location of LoA so he can convince them to train him.

Clark. Beloved boy, plays basketball, lacrosse, soccer, football, is on the student committee, helps out his Ma and Pa. And in his free time, he stares at Bruce Wayne. His best friend, Diana, calls him out on it many times, a teasing smile on her face. And Clark absolutely *hates* that bald rich boy who acts like he's better than everyone—Lex.

Diana, she's recently been sent to Man's World to learn their traditions, expand her horizons and shit. Kinda like Diana from dc super hero girls. She plays all the sports Clark does, the main reason they ended up as friends. There's this one popular girl—Selina's friend—who ticks her off, for some reason she can't figure out. Barbara Minerva. But Diana's friends, Shiera and Dinah, stop her from acting on it. The three have confided in each other—they know Diana is an Amazon, know Shiera and Carter are Hawkman—but Dinah doesn't know she has powers, yet. She only knows that powers run in her family.

Dinah, meanwhile, is on-and-off dating the playboy rich kid, Oliver fucking Queen. He's... stereotypical, at times. He buys her roses and shows up to every one of her choir concerts, buys her Starbucks every morning... then on weekends, he brings her to his private shooting range, shows her his "mad archery skills". At this point, Ollie is debating whether or not to become Green Arrow. Dinah, she's currently a singer. She's in the choir, she's going to do a solo at her school's talent show. Little do they know, *that's* when her powers will show up. While she's screaming into a fucking mic.

Barry Allen. Has a crush on this girl, Iris. Like, he's down BAD. Iris and her friend Lois Lane, they both run the school paper, so Barry decides to do something they'll want to cover. He starts working on something he hopes will get their attention, but it blows up, Barry is hospitalized... and wakes up with powers.

John Stewart and Guy Gardener are upperclassmen, both seniors, so close to graduating when they find out a freshman (Kyle) and sophomore (Hal) have been given the rings. Of course, they don't have a choice but to mentor them, and, yk, make sure they don't die. John tries his best to be a good mentor, pointing out mistakes and making time for Hal and Kyle, while Guy is a little shit as always. Oh yeah, Guy and John r both also studying for their SATs while being green lanterns.

Carter and Shiera? Power couple. Been together since freshman year, will always *be* together. Plus, being Hawkman and Hawkgirl is prime bonding time. They're literally destined to always be together.

John Jones. Everyone always thinks there's something... *different* about him. When John notices that *Clark* isn't like these humans either, he approaches him, helps him realize he's Kryptonian. The two randomly becoming friends makes Bruce suspicious... and that's how Batman figures out that they're not humans. (Side note, when Bruce starts asking Clark tons of questions out of no where, instead of being suspicious, he reads it as a love language)

(...is it too obvious that I'm a SuperBat shipper)

ANYWAY yeah that's all I have for now. Just vague ideas of dynamics and stuff, with no actual storyline... but if you guys have any more ideas or things you'd like to see, PLEASE let me know! I rlly rlly rlly wanna read this and write this fic but I don't know what to writeee 😭