#I'm sick and tired and I want to cry | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

callmekamel · 11 months ago

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Suggestion to use Beccatrice as the ship name for Beatrice/Rebecca. Thoughts?

#rebecca das musical #beatrice lacy #rebecca de winter #I'm sick and tired and I want to cry #but hey Beatrice Lacy is handsome #and the 30s fashion is crunchy #beccatrice #camel art

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kittylittersmoothie · 3 months ago

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again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and

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talesoftheesun · 5 months ago

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I refuse to acknowledge anything that happened in this volume. none of this happened. must've just been a heat induced fever dream. nope. no way.

#THE FACT WE DON'T EVEN GET TO BE UPSET #STOP WRITING SUCH SPINELESS MC'S I'M SICK AND TIRED OF BEING FORCED TO BE TIMID AND A DOORMAT #AND YOU GOTTA PAY 17 GEMS TO REMIND HIM OF HOW COMPATIBLE WE ARE???#I don't even want any of these li's anymore bro #it's all same dialogue different name so there's no defending ANYONE #I didn't even get to say goodbye to chen but then if you stick with chen he's gonna do that weird thing with uma #and in the dressing room??? not matter what you say your li says you don't know him as well as yall thought #damned if you do damned if you don't #I HATE IT HERE #LET MY MC JUST FUCKING WALK PLS I'M DONE #insert quen blackwell screaming crying gif #litg #litg s9 #love island the game #sun.txt

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foreverxdaydreaming · 3 months ago

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#just needed to vent for a sec but oh god am i tired of people #'friends' both irl and online got me fucked up lately #mental healths been in the shitter almost nonstop this year #familys always got me up the wall #i just feel like I'm constantly treading water and i am *tired*. like so fucking TIRED #it's never enough; it's too much; no not like that; but not that either; it's all wrong wRoNg WrOnG #ik im sleep deprived and possibly pms-y and that is most certainly not helping things rn but...#gods i see less and less of a reason to get out of bed and bother with anything ever again #wtf is the purpose #i can't keep friends to save my life bc im apparently a fuckin doormat and interesting as unflavored rice or smth #how hard is it to feel like you maybe sorta kinda matter and aren't an unlovable worthless piece of shit #years of therapy; trying meds; everything under the sun.... and nothing. lows and highs and dips of every kind and yet ..nothing #and maybe im just very much in my feelings rn and just yelling into the void.. but it hurts and im tired of pretending it doesn't.#i hate how hard it is to make friends as an adult especially irl. and how gossipy and cliquey and gross and mean ppl can be #of getting called childish and naive and boring for wanting to be a decent person and having interests outside of partying #(not attacking those traits but tired of getting attacked for *not* being 'fun' enough or 'social' enuf or 'sensitive' for having feelings)#enough*#i just want to go eat drywall and stand in the rain and let it help me pretend im not crying blood rn.#like every cell in my body isn't trying to spontaneously combust.#'it gets better' ..yeah? when. when i was 14? when i was 23? when im 37? when im 55? 82? WHEN.. bc im so sick and tired #and no this isn't me writing a final note or whatever it sounds like; i just wanted to word vomit bc ive never been good w sadness #and ive got such an overwhelming amount of it rn i can't even turn it into anger & spite & use that for productivity... i just want to rot #to lie down and be covered by plants as i sleep and just slowly fade into a cloud or smth like it's a ghibli movie or wtv.#im like shaking from how stupidly emotional i feel rn. the lack of empathy these days is fuckin astounding #common sense & empathy are lacking in absolutely droves these days. some days i hate the internet & tech for its irreparable damages sm #but here we are and here it shall remain. long after us; and *long* after us ..... *sigh*#anyway ima go try to take a nap or smth. I'll see ya when i see ya. take care my lovelies #if u read all this i prob owe you a cookie lol

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disdaidal · 11 months ago

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I wanna thank my irl friends who follow me here and also my beloved mutuals as well as followers who still send me kind messages and try to interact with me and my stuff even if I'm bad at doing it myself.

Honestly, things haven't been that great with me lately, so... it means a lot to me. Honestly. <3

#personal #i had to make the tough decision to drop out of school last week #i didn't exactly want it if i'm being completely honest here #but certain stuff was preventing me from getting further so i knew the teachers are gonna ask me to quit over at our teams meeting #i instantly contacted my nurse about my situation. and she got me a doctor's appointment which was yesterday #where i kind of broke down a little. not because she didn't grant me the sick leave i thought i was going to get #after feeling down and sleeping terribly for weeks #but because she actually *got me*. like. she actually listened to me and figured out some stuff and told me that #what i'm going through and what i've been going through for years would make anyone depressed #so i couldn't help but cry a little because yeah. i'm so tired of never being enough no matter how hard i try #because my brain's wired a certain way and it makes me slow and kinda clumsy and inattentive at times #which. you might guess is not ideal at today's work environment. or studying-wise even #so instead of granting me sick leave (she did say we can change that at anytime though) she told me to wait for that phone call #from the unemployment office. which i should be getting tomorrow. or well. later today #and talk to them about this. to see if they can offer some solutions. or if we can figure something out #'cause i'm getting closer to my 40s and not getting anywhere and it's wearing me out and tiring me out #because i clearly can't help myself or change my ways on my own #i managed to get some work last week though. at the local youth house. one shift though but money still #but i haven't been getting those offers a lot during the past few months so it's not enough to support me obviously #so i definitely need something else. and i hope i can get help. that someone could help me #i should finally get tested for adhd next month too. i don't know if i even have it or if it's gonna change anything but #at least i'd know #anyway i needed to get this off my chest. cause i'm kinda crying a little bit even now just thinking about this whole thing #sorry

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apocalypticdemon · 5 months ago

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I am so beyond ready to quit this job. Wednesday cannot come fast enough.

#to be fair it's bc school starts again in a few weeks #but idk. every day at this office feels like sandpaper on my skin. people always ask me shit i dont understand #and every case is so individual there's no set checklist to follow to troubleshoot #so most of the time I just grind my gears and get stuck #it'd busy more days than not.#and it was advertised to me as data entry only. client interactions was not what i signed up for.#it's all client interaction.#we're short staffed so nobody gets to take the back office and have a break.#when we weren't short staffed i was the new guy and only got 1 day in the back a week while everyone else got 2.#all my coworkers are conservative but talk like they're apolitical.#i thought it'd be fulfilling bc im helping people get benefits #but many are rude or impatient as any other service job. I'm constantly trying to direct people that don't want to listen #or explain the intricacies of something i barely understand.#and i don't want to lead people astray bc you have to start over if you blow a deadline.#but there's just nothing redeeming that i enjoy.#i hate customer service. i hate constantly asking questions. i like seldom few of my coworkers.#i can't be me at work.#and i don't care about the work itself anymore.#this job made me cry every day for weeks last month from sheer stress and overstimulation.#i almost cried myself sick several times.#the only reason I'm not there anymore is bc i dont fucking care anymore.#it took me 2 months to burn out. 2 months!#i was training for half of that!!#idk. everyone decided i was smart and could pick it up quickly so. even though everyone else got 4-6 weeks of shadowing #you can make do with 3 before you start doing stuff solo.#which feels unfair. i wasn't ready for it. and i resent the decision quite a bit.#plus it's been a nightmare for me in terms of external stressors and my generally deteriorating mental health. so.#all in all. i hate it here.#and i can't wait to turn in my notice so i can gtfo in 2 weeks #i am so tired. free me. let me go back to my music please

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wizardnuke · 6 months ago

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the lord is testing me so hard rn. holy fuck. give me a break

#hbbbbbb spent what i built up after the semester on the mortgage i'm tired i have a full shift tomorrow and now the powers out and #i need a charger block for my phone cause i need to wake up tomorrow. wanted a shower. mom was gonna make a quiche i don't want wendy's lmao #i also do not want to start crying in front of her i am just. grumpy. and it is fine. but i need to not be tearing up when i get to the #pharmacy because my friend works there and will ask what's wrong and im not crying in cvs. so. hough. okay.#stop tearing up. get meds. get shitty stupid dinner i'm so sick of chicken holy fuck. go home. mom is also extremely overwhelmed i don't #want to get upset in front of her idk how to not do that. hhhgh. sucks. it sucks and it's bad and i'm tired

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talkorsomething · 6 months ago

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I have Got to get more transgender

#100% секретный дневник левы НЕ ЧИТАЙ #transmasc #trans ftm #transgender #i like 2 say i'm very trans already but unforch i am Not Really. mostly boring ftm Guy Ever #so tempted to cut my hair again but my sense of what i look like is already so fuzzy i dont think it'd help..#want to dye my hair anyways. at this point i'd take whatever color i can get if not purple LOL #it's almost everything i could want and yet ... still me. still the same life. stuck.#soooo high functioning like you wouldnt believe EXCEPT istg i need an emotional support human who will guide me through tasks #such as 'pay with your Moneys Card at the Store'#or... idk that's it really. maybe go grocery shopping without feeling like i'm not meant to be there also #or like. exist in general maybe #reasons why not emotional support Animal: creature cannot understand capitalism. and also is not as necessary as a service dog specifically #idk! every time i come on here i fall apart (in text) and then pull myself back together for another day of ... this i guess.#i'm not even having like crying breakdowns or anything to go along with it i'm just held inside this shell of a body. typing away again #i'm soso tempted to make things worse. progress wouldn't matter anymore... at least maybe it would feel real that i'm like this #i wish my face fit on my body right. and also that i did not look quite so much like a vaguely gnc lesbian #like at LEAST let me look butch as hell but no. curse of sad hair & uncertainty #miss my little mullety thing from that brief period in october... miss my short hair from back in 2017 ...#just dont feel satisfied with what i am now. in general.#top surgery is literally Within my reach but i'm not sure about cost and i need to wait because of doing guard now......#my list of do i want t i kept for the past month turned out to be a bunch of maybes #partially cause i got sick. partially cause it stopped being shark week and i forgot about it #as always happens...#still unsure in my new(er) name. only heard it once #didn't feel the same way as with my old one? but idk. just don't know.#missing guard also but feeling conflicted about not having time for other hobbies...#since winter season is over i've had so much time to play guitar! that's insane! mostly cause i stopped playing for unrelated reasons...#just tired again. wonder if i need more sleep than what i always get. kind of restless.#there's nothing else to say i guess. just wish i could be a person the way everyone else seems to be.

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panb1mbo · 1 year ago

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i'm halfway done with my program + i'm finally on break i would sound excited but i don't fucking want to

#i am tired i am stressed i am sick of academia #i do not feel cash money abt this at all #maybe i should feel happier abt this achievement but tbh i just want like a massive amount of weed and maybe to cry #where is the sign up sheet to become a basement pet cos like i'm outtie i'm outtie 5000 #do i tag this as a vent post a school thing or a picture of me??? ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh #ok 2 rblg

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sga-owns-my-soul · 9 months ago

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i need a 6 month vacation from being alive pls

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moonlit-orchid · 8 months ago

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When your friend needs you to be there to comfort them, but you have no energy for serious conversations and so you're stuck wondering if youre being a selfish asshole or if youre justified in not wanting to be the one to sort their problems out