#I'm not sure if i succeeded
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hi!! is it possible to get a bunny + fallen angel themed moodboard? masc/androgynous preferably, no paci, and like darker colors pls!! no worries if not :)
Sure!!
#fallen angel#and bunnies#this was an interesting one#i tried to make it angelic yet dark#I'm not sure if i succeeded#but i still like it#anyway i hope you like it too!#tw religion#tw religious themes#angels#bunnies#sfw interaction only#moodboard#sfw agere#age regression#agere#sfw littlespace#agere moodboard#too bad anon didn't want a paci#i found one that said fallen angel on it in dark colors#oh well
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December 2 - Story Time
#rottmnt#rise fanart#turtle tots#style consistency?#i hardly know her#hrrgkgksglk#i'm gonna try “queuing” this to post later today even though i have no idea how to do that just yet#so... fingers crossed i figure that out#if anyone sees this at 7:30pm EST just know i succeeded#i'm not sure if everyday is going to be a turtle tot day#but gosh darn it these first few days definitely are#firm believer that Donnie was the first one to learn how to read so he's narrating the play i will die on this hill (no i wont)#teidoodle#tei's dec23
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OMGGG Your latest smut fic is so amazing!!! The smut is absolutely delicious! but....the angst is breaking my heart so...could you please write a continuation or part two where the reader confronts Aventurine's dark internal thoughts and comforts them? A fic where they actually get him to believe that they love him for real, where they tell him that he's not a monster and that he wasn't ruining them.
You've got it ! (˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧
Aventurine x Reader
You treat Aventurine with more respect than he deserves. (Part 2)
Read part 1 here !
CW: dehumanisation (internal, thoughts Aventurine has of himself, referring to himself as a “monster”), lots of mentions of death, passively suicidal Aventurine, violent imagery (through metaphors, nobody is actually physically harmed), intrusive thoughts, Aventurine thinks kind of vicious things about you (refers to you as "stupid", "brainless", "naive" etc), cursing.
Lmk if there’s anything else I should warn about !!
Small note: Spoiler alert sorry, but you will not completely fix Aventurine in this fic. Making any real progress would take YEARS. The trauma he's gone through and his beliefs about his own humanity are EXTREMELY deep-seated, just one conversation would not be enough to make him truly believe he was loved. Super sorry since I'm sure that's not what you wanted (you specifically requested they "truly get him to believe that they love him for real", but this does still end on a hopeful note so I hope you won't be too disappointed (•ᴗ•,, ) )
Sometimes Aventurine gains enough clarity to remember where he stands. More importantly, he gains enough clarity to remember where you should stand. That is to say, as far away from him as possible. Unfortunately, you are never keen on doing that.
In these moments of clarity, he distances himself. If you won’t do it, he has to. He needs to. He needs to even when he can feel the little pieces of him that you’ve managed to haphazardly glue together splinter into tiny shards again, even when it feels like every step away is a step walked on shattered glass. He can hardly be called a ‘person’ anyways, what does his suffering matter? He has already lost so many good things, why not add another loss to the tally?
He reads your texts, but he doesn’t respond. He hangs up on you the moment you call. By doing this, he makes sure you know he is alive. Both because he knows it would devastate you if you thought he died, but even more so to make sure you know he is intentionally ignoring you. He hopes at least some part of you hates him. He thinks part of him hates you.
But he can never stay away for long. Like a werewolf called by the full moon; like a vampire to blood; like a siren to a sailor. Thoughts of you always cloud his mind too much to do what is right. He reminds himself he will destroy you. He comes back anyways. He is too selfish not to.
And you welcome him with open arms every time. Sure, sometimes you yell. Sometimes you berate him. Sometimes you cry. But he never does something beyond the bounds of what you’ll forgive, even though he tries to. You’re patient to a fault. Though he feels bad, he never takes it fully seriously, because you always hold him with so much sweetness, even when your words are filled with righteous anger and justified hurt. You always end it by reminding him that you love him. Something clenches in his chest; something that is not his heart, because he has none. He claims he is sorry, but you both know he will do this again. He always does. You know he will hurt you over and over, even if you don’t know the extent. You know he will test you, that he will ignore you, that he will cling to you and that he will taunt you. You don’t know he will drag his claws through you and tear you to ribbons; you don’t know he will sink his teeth into your neck and drink all your blood; you don’t know he will lure you to sea and drown you. You are never aware of the true danger you are in.
Maybe that’s why you one day feel comfortable enough to corner the creature that has taken on the appearance of a lover. You sit down next to him in bed one evening after one of his many attempts to push you away, your expression grim. You look straight ahead, right into his dead eyes, unaware that a monster is towering over you.
“We can’t go on like this,” you say. For one moment, the crushing relief and devastation threatens to consume him, and he’s not sure which of the feelings is stronger. For one moment he can’t breathe.
He hacks our a laugh, his skin straining. Something is shifting beneath his flesh, something ugly and dangerous. He needs to leave and he needs to do it quickly.
“You’re right, we can’t,” he agrees, his voice a lot more steady than he feels. He feels the urge to grab you and shake you until you pass out. He feels the urge to suck out your life force until your body is an empty husk. He feels the urge to slam your head into the bathroom sink in the next room over. He feels the urge to shoot himself in the head, because he does not want to do any of that.
“I love you,” you say, unexpectedly. Or maybe it’s not unexpected. You always say such stupid, brainless things. (You say it with sweetness. The only sweetness he can offer in return is the sweetness of bacteria digesting rotting meat. Is the flesh his, or will it be yours?) He laughs again.
“I thought we were breaking up,” he says. Smirking, as if it’s funny. (It isn’t.)
“No, we’re really not,” you say firmly. He snorts.
“Maybe we should.”
You don’t answer. Instead, you come closer.
Get away, he thinks. Run, you fucking idiot.
You don’t have many flaws, but the ones you do have are insurmountably big. You are too forgiving, you are too kind, you are too selfless, you are too naive. You will kill yourself doing this one day. You will let him kill you.
Your arms wrap around him. He can’t help but relax. The thing lurking under his human disguise grows more restless.
“I don’t hate you,” you say, unexpectedly. And this one really is unexpected, because what made you say that? Your arms squeeze around him tighter. “I thought I was being obvious enough about that, but you’re so bad at understanding it.”
The feeling he has is the same as the feeling he gets when he realises a deal is going awry. You are the highest risk stakes he has ever made a bet on: will he ruin you, or will you ruin him? What you could do to him is so much more serious than death. He knows that he is holding a losing hand. He doesn’t even know what he stands to win.
You kiss his neck. He shudders.
“Why are you so scared of me?” you ask.
Scared? He is not scared. What an outright laughable concept. Neither of you are scared, but if one of you was, it should be you, but you aren’t, for some reason.
“What gives you that idea?” he chuckles, but his voice is not as steady this time, and he can feel his smile slipping. (What is wrong with him? He doesn’t want to think about it. The answer is always ‘everything’.)
“Your hand is shaking.”
It is, but that is not because he is afraid. Fear is a human response, borne from the desire to live. It is instinctual. It means kicking and screaming, it means clawing your way out of hell for the chance to see another day, it means fighting for the life you don’t want to end. He cannot die, you see. Death cannot occur twice. Just because his body reacts, that does not necessarily mean he can truly fear any longer.
(Then again, maybe his reaction does not come from the thought of his death.)
“I’m not scared,” he says, and his voice sounds a lot weaker than he had expected. You pull him closer, cradling his head against the crook of your neck. His blood is pulsing too quickly.
“It would be okay if you were,” you murmur. “I know you don’t know how to be loved. That’s okay. I’ll teach you. You just have to let me.”
Squash. Slice. Tear.
Maybe you are the monster. He can feel your claws prying his chest open; he can feel your teeth dig into his flesh; he can feel something that is not air fill his lungs. The biggest difference between you and him is that he devours, while you give. You painfully shove something back into the cavity meant to contain his soul, you pump blood back into his system, and you fill whatever gaps are left in him with something that is first cold but quickly warms.
(He realises, belatedly, that something is pumping inside his chest again. But it can’t be a heart, can it? He lost that so long ago.)
“I’ll kill you,” he manages through gritted teeth, claws digging into your shirt. It is not a threat. It is not a warning. It is just the truth.
“You think too much,” you admonish him. Your tone is as gentle as your words are cutting. “I wish you would trust me more. You’re so determined to ruin your own life, and I don’t like it.”
“That’s just how I am. Deal with it or leave.”
“I’ll deal with it, then.”
Like a werewolf called by the full moon; like a vampire to blood; like a siren to a sailor. He will destroy you. But you accept it.
He has tried time and time again to push you away, but he is weak. So incorrigibly weak, and though your flaws are insurmountable, his are all-consuming. He is a monster in all the ways that matter. But you stubbornly will not leave despite that.
(Maybe that makes him a little more willing to try to change his nature. Just a little. Just for you. If you will not leave anyways, maybe he could try to make his presence a little less torturous.)
“Just… please stop ignoring me,” you sigh, nuzzling into his hair. Tenderly, tenderly, tenderly, so tenderly it makes his skin crawl. Your claws are softly piercing into him and he is helpless, unable (unwilling) to fight back. “I can deal with everything else. I just hate it when you do that. I can’t keep going weeks without speaking to you. I know you have some kind of… weird ideas that I’d be better off without you, but that’s not true. I love you, and I love being around you. I can’t help you when you cut me off at every corner.”
Cut, slice, slash.
Something in him breaks. Something he knows cannot be salvaged. Something he knows you would not want to salvage. Something he is not sure if he wants to salvage either, now that it is broken anyways.
He breathes a shaky breath, his fingers — his fingers, not claws, not this time — digging into your back. He buries his face into the crook of your neck, and he does not feel the urge to bite down. Though his eyes feel wet, it would not be enough water to drown you.
He knows your line of logic is wrong. He knows the fact remains unchanged: he is a monster of a man. He will ruin you. But maybe your presence sparks enough electricity to keep his heart pumping, just for a little while, and maybe he can wait until things actually start going downhill before he lets you go. Maybe he can remember how to be a human for a bit, maybe he can pretend he is.
“I just… don’t want to do something I can’t take back,” he whispers. “Not with you. You’re the… the only good thing I have left. I don’t know what I’d do if I…”
“That’s sweet, but I’m not as weak as you think I am,” you reply. “I’ve held out this long, haven’t I? Put more faith in me.”
He smiles.
“Yeah, I guess you’re right.”
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My inbox is open, feel free to send in asks or requests, I'd love to ramble about things <3 Also reblogs are EXTREMELY appreciated the final push I needed to finish this was from a very kind individual who reposted and analysed my writing I've been riding that high ever since they did that ily bro
#[rawbin]#[aventurine]#[rawbin fanfic]#[by me]#aventurine x reader#Tried some sort of weird monster metaphor by bringing up werewolf vampire and siren imagery idk if that worked out the way I wanted but -#whatever part of the process is making weird decisions and learning what did and didn't work out#Not entirely happy with this but I wasn't with the previous part either so yolo I don't have the patience to scrap this and start over#Tried to make the dialogue sound like things real actual human being would say but idk if I succeeded#Especially when reader reassures him what person actually speaks so eloquently ?? not me that's for sure#And the part where Aventurine is like “😢 i-i-i don't w-w-wanna hurt you pookiebear!!!” he would not say that straight out#but whatever I'm tired and I can tell I will not be finding the motivation to work for this one more night#plsss continue sendinf requests guys it makes me happy#Currently working on qpps Aventurine (whoever sent that request I actually love you)#(reason it's taking so long is because I've written so much in the tumblr app and my phone keeps overheating so I need to take breaks HELP)#(I've learnt my lesson and will try to stick to writing in my notes app when I suspect I might write a lot <3)#Jesus these tags are an essay sorry I just CANNOT shut up I looove speaking I love it love it love it#aventurine honkai star rail#aventurine hsr#aventurine star rail#hsr aventurine#aventurine#aventurine fanfic#reader x aventurine#honkai star rail x reader#honkai star rail#hsr x you#hsr x reader#hsr#star rail
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I carried this thing for MONTHS with the EXPRESS PURPOSE of putting Raphael in it (knowing full well Larian wouldn't let me do that, mechanically) and I had one major miscalculation.
| First | | Previous | | Next |
[[ All Croissant Adventures (chronological, desktop) ]]
[[ All Croissant Adventures (app) ]]
#Ok I'm gonna ramble in the tags about all this get ready:#I KNEW Larian wouldn't let me actually pull this off but I PROMISE you that stupid flask sat in my inventory since the moment I grabbed it#WAITING for when I could write this little bit about putting Raphael in it#I even threw it at him in the fight with a 30% hit chance and it succeeded so I considered that Larian giving me permission to say it workd#But as I was reading up on it again when I was sketching this I saw the bit about native planes and I cried LMAO. But it's dnd-#so I rewrote is as it would've happened in a game. U kno.#Also I have been waiting to use that fox line for SO LONG bc of Croissant's dad being a fox-like fey creature#So much backstory that's slotted in PERFECTLY with the BG3 narrative#Anyway absolutely wild that we managed to take out this ancient powerful devil - and on the first try!#Lae'zel with a potion of speed did WORK. Gale came in clutch with hold monster. Astarion gave Raph stage fright. Croissant made him dance#(I'm pretty sure he just doesn't have a dance animation in ascended form lol)#Hope didn't even need to use divine intervention - this party is terrifying#Croissant hated him but in the end I loved Raphael I see why all you people like him#bg3#baldur's gate 3#bg3 spoilers#act III spoilers#house of hope#croissant adventures#tav#raphael#lae'zel#iron flask#comics#ALSO shoutouts to you if you both noticed and knew which worthikids animation I borrowed the expression in panel 5 from
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Hii!!
I'm the anon who asked about belphie and mc's nsfw moment and by their first meeting I meant when he seduces mc instead of killing them as a form a revenge. Just that!
You can start it however you like
Whenever is OG or NB
Okay, got it!
Well, I did my best lol. I used some actual lines from the game from Lesson 16 in OG. I don't know if I managed to write what you're asking for... but I tried! Hopefully it isn't too terrible.
GN!MC x Belphegor
NSFW MDNI
Warnings: Belphie is super manipulative and probably kinda OOC, penetration (reader receiving), biting
When Belphie opened his arms to hug you, you stepped into them readily. How long had you been hoping to set him free? And now you were in the attic and the door was open.
Belphie held you close, almost gently, his face buried in your neck. You felt the warmth of his breath on your skin.
"Ah… this really brings back memories," he said. "This feeling… I wonder how long it's been since I've touched a human? So, MC…"
He stepped back, but kept his hands on your waist and suddenly he was in demon form. A thrill ran through you at the sight.
"…how can I express how I'm feeling right now?" Belphie reached up to trace your bottom lip with his thumb. "What can I do?"
You weren't expecting to have this kind of reaction to him. There was a hunger in his eyes that you couldn't mistake and yet you found yourself ready, willing.
"You're stunning," Belphie said, clearly looking you up and down. He stepped closer to you again, wrapping an arm around you. "You won't make me beg, will you?"
He pressed his lips to your neck, almost biting, before he pulled back to kiss you properly.
You could have resisted, perhaps. You could have refused him. But there was so much tension between you and in that moment, all you wanted was to feel him. You kissed him back, tugged on his clothes, indicating your desire for their removal.
Belphie laughed into the kiss, pulling you against him as he moved toward the bed in the attic.
You were in a haze of heat and need as he undressed you, removing your clothes without a second thought before tossing his own to the floor.
For months, you had been working toward opening that attic door. Never once had you imagined that it would lead to this. The look in Belphie's eyes made you feel like he was planning to devour you and you found you wanted nothing else.
You squirmed a bit with impatience and he laughed again.
Belphie put a hand on your cheek. "Ah, you're so desperate for me, aren't you, MC?"
You didn't have a chance to reply as he pressed his cock into your heat. He moved faster than you were prepared for and you cried out, clutching at him, leaving nail marks in his back.
His thrusts were hard and fast from the start. You moaned and your body shuddered, your legs naturally wrapping around him.
Belphie didn't hold back. His horn pressed against your cheek as he bit your shoulder and your nails dug deeper into his back.
You came first, crying out incoherently as you did, squirming beneath him as he kept going, never losing momentum even as you squeezed him hard with your orgasm.
He lifted your hips to give himself better access and his cock was hitting that spot inside you with a consistent rhythm. Tears sprang to your eyes as you crashed into overstimulation, your fingernails raking down his arms, his name falling unceasingly from your lips.
When Belphie finally came, you gasped at the feeling of his cum inside of you. He slipped out of his demon form, laying down next to you and pressing his face into your neck.
"You humans really are foolish, idiotic, weak creatures, aren't you?" he whispered into your ear.
masterlist | Thank you for reading!
#I was trying to indicate it was for revenge with the end there#not sure if I succeeded#but also this is a drabble so it's meant to be short#and also I dunno this is during the lesson 16 incident so I felt like he was being a lil more evil than usual#so it might not be as ooc as I think lol#I'm just used to writing fluff#obey me#obey me nightbringer#obey me belphegor#obey me belphie#obey me smut#obey me belphie x reader#obey me belphie x mc#om belphegor#x reader#request#misc writes#misc naughty times
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Athena.exe ━ Rogue AI
#My Post#My Screenshots#Virtual Photography#Cyberpunk 2077#OC: Athena.exe#Trying to make them look scary and terrifying without the use of expressions#It's been interesting trying to find ways to showcase emotions that is not just them making a face#Not entirely sure if I'm succeeding or not but I am having fun
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Mission going wrong-
William: Time for plan G
Albert: Don't you mean plan B?
William: No, we tried plan B a long time ago. I had to skip over plan C due to technical difficulties
Bond: What about plan D?
William: Plan D was the desperate disguise attempt an hour ago
Sherlock: What about plan E?
William: I'm hoping we don't have to come to that. You die in plan E
Louis: I like plan E
#moriarty the patriot#william james moriarty#albert james moriarty#bond#sherlock holmes#louis james moriarty#louis and his hatred for sherlock#i don't remember where i've read this one but i'm sure it was about teen wolf#mission going wrong#but they succeeded in the end#nobody died#incorrect quotes
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jared padelecki and jensen ackles jaxcon 2023 gold panel (x) / gen v s1e6 jumanji
diddling and musk flavored skittles
#j2#jensen ackles#jared padalecki#skittles#if i had to see this so do you#jaxcon23#jaxcon#soldier boy#gen v#the boys#mygifs#i took some liberties with what jared said because i'm not sure exactly what he was goin for with his eau de something musc#and there was more to the hp sentence i couldn't understand but i gather it was a reference to the every flavor beans? i don't know her#anyway i was gonna leave it out but i mean. sweaty flavored skittles.#jared trying to dodge the anticipated crotch smack on the way out made me laugh#tried to make the gifs small enough they wouldn't choke on phones but may not have succeeded#long post#j2gifs
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just having a normal one thinking about how badly Armand wants to be loved but every time he gets close to it, he self sabotages and ruins it. almost as if. he subconsciously doesn't think he deserves it.
#I'm fine I'm good I'm so normal about him#he does it with EVERY romantic relationship we see him have it's insane#first with lestat and their whole Thing. especially the nicki stuff we haven't seen yet.#then louis. like he lets himself have it and then realizes it's possible for it to work and IMMEDIATELY blows it#by you know. trying to kill him. actually succeeding in killing his daughter.#making sure there's no possible way louis will ever forgive him even as he plots and manipulates to underplay his role in it#they loved each other but armand made sure it would never be in the way he craved the most and then punished himself for it#by strong manning the relationship together with hot glue and stickers even if it was hurting them both#AND THEN with daniel too ffs#DOUBLE of it with daniel if past-devil minion happened too fuck#turning him and then leaving him bc daniel SEES him for who he is and he's not afraid (I mean he is but YOU GET WHAT I MEAN)#possibly erasing his memories of him from the 70's & 80's as both a fucked up attempt to keep daniel alive#(which tbf it works but is STILL a fucked up thing to do)#and to get himself out of a situation in which someone finally started to love him unconditionally the way he wants so badly#but he can't let himself have that can he#I AM SO NORMAL ABOUT THE VAMPIRE ARMAND GUYS#I might be wrong idk I have yet to rewatch s2 but#BUT IT HURTS ANYWAY DONT IT#iwtv#armand#iwtv amc#the vampire armand#interview with the vampire#iwtv s2#armandposting#robin going insane about armand again#iwtv armand
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I'm gonna be real, so little of previous games have actually mattered in any way beyond flavor text that I literally could not give less of a shit about this whole debacle. Like it's such a non-issue to me. Idk what games y'all have been playing for 15 years but truly this is the norm. Barely anything carried over from Origins to Hawke and all pretty minor shit, and I genuinely cannot think of anything beyond flavor text carrying over to Inquisition. Oh you could customize Hawke and they can answer a few vague questions with vague bullshit? Cool, presumably that's what the Inquisitor will give us. Like idk guys but I think maybe building up your expectations for a decade has had a detrimental effect on what should be reasonable expectations for a video game that's truly been in development hell for like eight years and wants to be functionably playable to brand new players without alienating them.
#like i played inquisition first and THEN played the first two and i didn't really lose anything doing it like that#it functioned as a fun game in a bubble that parcelled background info in small digestible codex snippets#then after playing the other games there was more IMPACT in new playthrough but no major revelations#honestly i think i probably had MORE fun playing Inquisition first that i would have if i'd played origins and hawke beforehand#presumably that's what they're aiming for with veilguard and honestly i'm super chill with that#i hope they once again succeeded in making both a good bubble video game AND reasonable sequel#like they set it a decade later for a reason guys: i'm pretty sure most major inquisition decisions will be old news by then#'oh a shitty mage/assassin/cop is the divine? she has been for like twelve years get over it grandpa'#'oh the circles are restored/abolished? yeah we know little timmy the mage was born AFTER the mage revolt of :41 and is doing fine'#'hey what happened with all those wardens fucking about in orlais during the breach crisis? literally who gives a fuck that was AGES ago'#look. i just cannot comprehend getting genuinely bent out of shape about this. like are you also still made about origins' epilogue slides?#dragon age: the veilguard#by apples
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The beautiful kind, making up for lost time Taking flight, making me feel right
WYLER SECRET SANTA 2022 | happy holidays elsbeth ! @laylakeating
#wednesdayedit#wednesdaynet#netflix wednesday#wednesday x tyler#wyler#weyler#wyleredit#weyleredit#tvedit#usergif#mine#wylerplaylist#wylersecretsanta2022#i hope you like it <3#you can see it as an AU where nothing bad happens to them lol#i saw you were a swiftie so i picked one of her songs i hope it's not like the one song you hate#and i tried to make it colorful but i'm not sure i succeeded#this set forced me to up my gif game though bc i wanted to be worthy of your talent it was so much fun!
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the pure dread that fills me when i think about drawing anything lately needs to be studied
#this is truly the worst art block i've ever had#like it's not even lack of motivation or inspiration i straight up just Do Not Want to draw rn#which uh#has never happened to me before??#in the past it's always been a general lack of motivation thing#or a lack of interesting ideas#or just being bored with my style#but no#i actually just... don't want to make art. like not even a little bit.#trying not to feel weird and scared about this realization!! not sure i'm succeeding!!#who even am i if i'm not making things etc etc lmao#crow rambles
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[Ch. 1, Page 6]
[FIRST] [PREVIOUS] [NEXT]
Great googly moogly, it’s full of particles
(Image formatted for mobile or fullscreen - view in new tab if you experience fuzzy resolution on desktop!)
#sonic the hedgehog#tails the fox#dr eggman#sonic fancomic#sonic au#story mode#i tried to make this page as visually clear as i could without it being overwhelming#and i'm not sure if i succeeded!#oh well we're moving on#don't worry tails; your big brother has this :)#:)))
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when you think about it clive and flora are actually perfect narrative foils on complete accident. like what's up with that. professor layton and the completely imagined literary devices
#what did they talk about when they were alone for that one segment of uf . . . humming#i'm sure this post has been made before by someone more eloquent but i don't shut up. ❤️❤️❤️#it's like the fact that they both lose their parents at a young age#both are succeeded by a large fortune#both are incredibly insurmountably lonely in a way they are not equipped to deal with#both develop poor coping mechanisms (though one notably more poor than the other . . . el oh el)#both develop a one-sided codependence on layton (or rather. more like the Idea of him. the concept he represents)#they also both spend a lot of screentime poorly disguised god bless ❤️#flora just seems to shrink inward while clive. Well#flora is seemingly willing to accept any type of mistreatment so long as she's told she won't be left alone again#whether because she can't bear the alternative or if she genuinely believes them every time is debatable#she's fine with being temporarily abandoned because she is used to it. as long as she's kept around some of the time she's fine#but clive internalizes every slight and files it away in some increasingly grandiose and frankly childish revenge fantasy#on a small handful of people that HAVE wronged him and a couple hundred thousand that never will#everything he sees is taken as proof of a worldview he doesn't even seem to necessarily hold himself#that at the end of the day is simply a manifestation of a seeping debilitating loneliness#they both have people that care for them. but not really in the type of way they need or want#i have more to say but . . . alas. not intelligent enough for it#my point: both of these characters ard the same coincidence? i think not. Transgender;#t#professor layton
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I heart colours
#I'm trying to use different colours for each jelly i draw#not sure if I'm succeeding or not but here we are#click for better quality#theshaker9000draws#jellyfish#art#artists on tumblr
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seriously can catastrophes stop happening for five minutes my brain is already fried from the ones we're already experiencing
#I fucking. missed d&d tonight by accident#I straight up forgot#and just didn't show up to the session#my sleep schedule is absolutely fucked#I should be sleeping now but brain won't shut up#my creative output is the lowest it's ever been and I've been in some level of depressive funk since like early january#I am just deeply unfathomably exhausted#like mentally and spiritually#all the time#my memory and sense of time are both shit#my spelling is worse than it used to be for some reason??#I really don't know what to do to make my brain start functioning again it's frankly worrying me#I couldn't even handle college so it should come as no surprise that I'm reacting poorly to the world being a perpetual screaming trash fir#and yet#idk it's been hitting again lately that I have never succeeded at anything in my life and just keep tripping and falling up for some reason#fucking everyone is in hell right now and with my overall success rate I should be dead in a ditch but I'm actually doing spectacularly#due to a series of improbable accidents and weird circumstances that happened to turn out in my favor instead of completely fucking me#aside from the looming spectre of my various failed attempts to have some kind of life trajectory#it just doesn't feel like this can keep up forever#like surely at some point the luck has got to run out I can't just keep living like some kind of folkloric trickster archetype#but my motivation and sense of purpose kind of died after the last failed attempt so I'm still just here#doing whatever this is#maybe I should drive out to the coast#maybe staring at the ocean would fix me I've been away from it for too long#I mean it can't make me worse#I should wait until further into summer though so I don't have to drive back in the dark#everyone around here has trucks with those goddamn LED headlights and I've got a little sedan that's directly in their blast zone
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