#I'm not saying whether I am correct or not
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
#yeah!!! I work in a retail lighting store and people are always telling me how confusing lightbulbs are now#the top right diagram is. bad. but the middle right one is good. that's by far the most accurate and helpful#so many people say they hate LEDs and what they don't understand is they just hate cool white. which is a correct opinion to have#but not reflective of all LEDs#they get so surprised when I tell them LEDs come in warm now like yeah baby it's the future#we have amber filament LEDs designed to look like old-school carbon filaments
#hi hello I'm autistic about lighting#I actually wrote out a whole other set of tags and deleted them cause I was basically just iterating what the middle left diagram said#I didn’t look at the diagrams at all before writing I just got really excited to talk about lights#if you have. questions you can ask me I've done this for a living for about 3 years now and I love it
#but honestly! if you're getting overwhelmed by lightbulbs you can literally always go to a lighting store and they know what to ask you to#essentially diagnose what lightbulb to give you#that's like. a major part of the job really#main questions to ask (aside from which fitting it is) being things like: is it on a dimmer? (LEDs need to be specified to be dimmable#if on a dimmer or they will flicker and also gradually damage your fitting until in some cases it can become a fire hazard)
#and what room is it going into? this will help determine the wattage/lumens and also the colour temperature#unless you are the kind of person who uses cool white/daylight exclusively you want warm light in living areas#when I'm talking about warm white usually here that's referring to 3000k or 2700k. cool white is normally 4000k#cool light can go into kitchens and bathrooms if you want but that can stay warm as well if you prefer it. and I personally suggest warm#light outside because it has less of an impact on the day/night cycle of the surrounding plants but some people prefer cool because it's#'brighter' which like. yeah but it's neglible tbh#cool white is pretty normal for garages. and there is an argument to be made for daylight for vanity lights (over a mirror) because it's th#closest your makeup will get to how it will actually look outside
#and then normally the last question is just like. what kind of light is it going into? normally at this point we've gleaned whether it's a#floor lamp or a wall light or a spotlight or whatever. but with pendants/shades specifically sometimes there are physical size restrictions#and if you have a nice open shade with glass or something you will want a nice bulb to inside instead of a half-frosted half-plastic one#cause you're gonna see that thing
#anyway hi!! I love lighting! I love lightbulbs and I love lights and I love helping people find the shit they love and I am. so sad I have#to leave this job bc of interpersonal issues with another coworker which has put me down to 2 days a week#I don't think literally anyone is going to read this but that's fine cause I had fun writing it!
(tags by @sudden-memory-loss. hopefully i paragraphed okay)
There are so many different shades of white light bulbs, I am so overwhelmed walking down the light bulb aisle, and then I'm never happy with the one I choose, no matter which one I choose, I get it home and I put it in and I'm like, ugh, I don't like THAT white
18K notes
·
View notes
Text
This came to me earlier, and now I am utterly obsessed: The Vengeance wasn't Odysseus stabbing Poseidon, it was Odysseus disproving Poseidon's "Ruthlessness is mercy upon ourselves" belief right in front of his very eyes. With him as the subject, even.
Think about it—the fact that Poseidon remained ruthless and insisted on punishing Odysseus was the only reason he got stabbed repeatedly. If Poseidon had been merciful, if he had accepted Odysseus' offer of forgiveness, he would've been fine. His own ruthlessness backfired so hard on him this time that I am sincerely hoping it haunts him forever.
I am actually utterly obsessed with Poseidon thinking back to Odysseus "Maybe you could learn to forgive?" on a daily, no an hourly basis. I cannot and will not lie to you that is unironically my favorite moment in the whole Vengeance saga just because of what it says about both the characters—about Odysseus for offering and Poseidon for declining. And this makes me love it even more.
Poseidon was going to decline, we all know that. I don't think anyone watching—even Odysseus, probably—expected him to accept. But then I'm picturing him lying there, bleeding into the stone, and, against his will, wondering whether maybe he should have. Maybe if he had, he wouldn't be in pain. Maybe if he had not killed Odysseus' fleet ten years ago, he wouldn't be in pain either. Maybe this one time ruthlessness wasn't mercy upon himself—maybe this time, his one grand belief was wrong. Maybe ... it was always wrong.
Obviously, he would never admit to these thoughts, he would slap himself for having them one second later. But I simply need this self-proclaimed god of ruthlessness to be utterly haunted by that and question whether he made the right choice or no—whether he's even lived by the correct philosophy all his immortal life—and no matter what, be too stubborn to admit he was wrong.
He's trying to pretend like nothing changed, but the thoughts still remain. They pester him. They won't leave him alone. Especially every time someone—anyone—is kind to him for whatever reason, they come crashing back into him and they won't leave.
"What if my own ruthlessness hurt me that time?"
"What if ruthlessness isn't mercy upon ourselves after all?"
"What if I'm wrong?"
"What if I have always been wrong?"
The most dreadful thoughts imaginable to a god as proud and stubborn and old as Poseidon, but they're there now and he can't do anything about them. You all don't understand how much I NEED this god to jolt up in his bed at 3 am after having a dream or nightmare about something related to one of his many ruthless deeds (maybe even sinking Odysseus' fleet) and go "BUT WHAT IF I HAD LEARNED TO FORGIVE?? WHAT IF I STILL COULD??" only to immediately slap himself for it because that's absolutely ridiculous.
He is left to watch this belief shatter before his very eyes as he's clinging to the remains of it desperately, trying to keep it all from crumbling. Not because he genuinely believes he's right anymore, but because he simply cannot imagine ... does not know how to live by any other philosophy.
No matter whether it's objectively correct or not, it's the very thing that defines him. The thing he's known for. He has built his entire image around this, he cannot give it up no matter what ... at least not quickly or without help.
But as much he would seek to deny it, his core belief has now been proven wrong; he has actually lived through an instance where it was wrong, and he can do nothing to erase those memories or conclusions from his mind no matter how much he yearns to go back to simpler times.
And that was the real Vengeance, guys—possibly the biggest, most painful existential crisis of Poseidon's immortal life. I rest my case.
Although before I disappear back into the void I simply must give a shout out to @o3o-lapd-o3o (this came to me during a conversation in one of their comment sections for the glorious Friends In Higher Places AU, which is quite possibly my favorite piece of EPIC fan content that exists ...)
#poseidon epic#epic the musical#epic musical#epic the vengeance saga#epic odysseus#poseidon#jorge rivera herrans#i have never believed in ruthlessness is mercy#but thank you so much odysseus for proving me right#with ruthlessness of your own#how very poetic#poseidon having an existential crisis over being too stubborn for redemption is sth i didnt know i needed#i wanna believe he gets there eventually#a few centuries later#odysseus has no idea what he did btw#he stabbed poseidon and that was that#he probably didnt think he could so much as make him question this#someone somewhere out there eventually notices maybe#HAVE I MENTIONED HOW OBSESSED I AM WITH ODYSSEUS' “MAYBE YOU COULD LEARN TO FORGIVE?” YET#because I AM#that god killed your whole fleet#thunder saga!odysseus would not have offered this#i love the subtle hints at odysseus' positive development in this saga almost more than anything#the only thing I don't love about them is that they're so subtle a majority of people don't notice them#friends in higher places au?#am i allowed to tag this as that ouo
92 notes
·
View notes
Text
Forever and a Day
Eric Draven x Reader
Summary: Eric is the only one who knows exactly what to say to warm your heart even during the coldest of nights.
Warnings: None
Word Count: 1,017
A/N: Today just felt different. More inspiration, more energy, more time. I can't say for sure how long this spell will last, but I hope it'll be for a while. Also, has anyone seen the new adaptation for The Crow? What do we think? I haven't seen it yet (mostly because I'm nervous).
You closed your eyes, trying to feel every sensation possible around you. The cold cement ground, the icy water flooding through your clothes, and the subtle numbness beginning in your fingertips.
You focused on this for a while, and just for that short amount of time, you felt your mind go quiet. But just like the rain soaking into your skin, the worries began to seep back into your mind.
Tears were starting to drip down your face, mixing with the cold droplets already drenched onto your cheeks. The slight warmth cut through the cold of the night, but it still wasn't enough to make reality better.
With a sigh, you finally opened your eyes. The rain immediately flooded into their warmth, but you didn't mind. Each droplet was a new sensation that you hadn't felt before.
And that's when you saw him.
You slightly turned your head to your left, and you saw his figure beside you, laying on his back with his eyes closed. You almost wanted to smile at the sight, but the strain in your lips felt foreign.
"I thought I was supposed to be the edgy, brooding one," his voice suddenly penetrated through the night.
That smile finally broke out onto your face, a part of you still wanting to push it down at all costs.
And as if he could see you through his closed eyes, he smiled back, his all knowing presence bringing a different sort of warmth to your chest.
"How long have you been here?" you asked, the sound coming out more softly than you anticipated.
You almost thought he hadn't heard you, but he was quick to respond back.
"With you? I'd like to think forever. And a day. You know, to be different than all the rest of those romantic junkies."
With that, he finally peeked one eye open, searching for any semblance of humor on your face.
You sat up onto your hands, rolling your wet eyes. Although, whether they were wet from just the rain or from your tears, you weren't sure now.
"Must you always be so cheesy?" you couldn't help but joke.
"Must you always be so edgy?"
You shot him a glare at this, but it held no weight. It never did. Because there was nothing about Eric that could make you feel anything but comforted.
He fully turned his head towards you, his eyes finally open to completely see you. The rain hardly had any effect on him, not a single squint as the freezing drops continued to fall repeatedly over his face.
"How am I being edgy?"
He laughed a bit as he inched a little closer to you.
"You found your way up to the roof of one of the tallest buildings in the city during a thunderstorm and laid out in the rain."
You began to giggle at his explanation.
"I'm just trying to feel something," you reasoned.
"That was the most edgy response you could have given me."
You gave him a teasing smack on the chest at this.
He returned with a genuine grin, but it slowly faded to sympathy the longer he looked at you.
"Scared?" he just about whispered.
His voice almost blended in with the rumble of thunder in the distance, but his sound was one you swore could be heard in even the most deafening of places. You'd find Eric in anything.
"Terrified," you corrected, moving your gaze out to the city lights in front of you.
There was a moment of silence between you two, but it wasn't awkward. It never was.
"I like coming up here during moments like these. Seeing the city's horizon take up the sky. It makes everything feel so... small, I suppose."
That familiar warmth started to spread through your face as the tears began to fall once again.
Eric finally sat up with you, his hand immediately reaching out for your cheek and wiping the water away.
And just like always, he made you smile.
"Eric, it's raining. How can you even tell?" you scoffed.
"I know you."
You turned back to him, hand twitching as you craved to move closer. His warmth suddenly felt more desired than the numbing cold of the storm.
He immediately knew and pulled you into him, holding you in the way only he could.
You tried not to let him feel your body shake as you held back more tears, but he only seemed to squeeze you a little tighter at this.
"How do I know I'm making the right decisions? I just feel like the world is against me in everything."
Eric grabbed your face in response, moving your gaze up to meet his.
"Who says the world gets to make those choices for you?" he asked softly. "The world is yours, not the other way around."
You sighed.
"I'm just so scared," you choked out. "What if this is the only life I'll get? I don't want to be that person who just tries and tries but never gets anywhere."
He ran his hand over the side of your face, bringing your attention back to him.
"Trying doesn't hold the negative weight that we give it. Everyone is trying, and that doesn't make it a bad thing. Anyone you deem as successful had to try first. And even then, they're still trying for something. Trying doesn't end; trying is the whole point of living. I was given a second life, and I'm still trying my best in this one," he smiled.
You couldn't help but gently smile back at him. His love never ceasing to make the broken parts inside you fit back together again.
"Am I just meant to keep trying forever then?" you questioned.
He brought his face even closer to you, his lips just barely ghosting your own.
"Perhaps. But just know, even if it lasts forever, I'll be with you through all of it, and then some," he joked.
You laughed slightly. "Forever and a day?"
He placed a small kiss to your lips.
"Not like the rest of those romantic junkies."
27 notes
·
View notes
Text
At this point, gender nonconformity is about what the person says their experience is.
If a woman with a beard or a man with lipstick and a mustache says they're gender nonconforming, then they are! If a woman with short hair or a man with long hair says they aren't, they aren't! And that's not even getting into the awesome nonbinary, abinary, genderqueer, intersex, and general genderfuckery that may both be and not be conforming.
So much of what is even considered gender conforming or gender nonconforming is based on a world of exclusion. When we start defining one's conformity with whether they fit into white cishetero perisex standards or not, we play into the idea that there's only a very narrow window of what is considered worthy of time and thought.
#gender nonconformity#gnc#queer#like. for instance a native man who keeps long hair might be considered GNC by white standards but for him it's absolutely not nonconformit#there's an aspect of white supremacy that silences everything else while saying that other culture's silence is indicative of whiteness...#...being 'correct' or 'moral' or 'neutral'#and as somebody who's trans and last i checked white i have my own thoughts from my own experiences#like how i don't consider myself to really be a GNC man. i'm just. man+#i'm a weird concoction of weird soup that tastes like a man but if it were Wrong#and i just don't see that as not conforming to manhood like it is seperate. i see it as irrevocably linked TO manhood#it is others who have excluded and exiled me from manhood because of *their* understanding of me and how i 'fit in' in cissexism#while i will never ever say i know what it's like to not be white i will say these conversations that PoC have started have been INVALUABLE#i am forever grateful to have been extended the patience and faith to listen in on the experiences of people...#...who are racialized in terms of gender and how they do/don't 'fit in' with often white supremacist views on gender/dynamics#may have made a post like this years back but. eh. arrest me officer i will not back down#i've been more and more 'gnc' as i go into my transition and i don't see it as nonconformity but as an outlet for my masculinity#which is why i'm not insecure about my crafts and creations. because it is coming from a male whether or not it's considered 'manly'#i have little to *no place* in cissexist society so why should i put any stakes into if they ~accept~ me#made this post while jamming out to skyrim's tavern OST (paused my game to write this)#why the HELL does the skyrim tavern music have to go SO HARD. i NEED to slam down BARRELS of mead while listening to this istg#i don't even LIKE honey so i haven't tried mead but. for skyrim i would.
171 notes
·
View notes
Text
Of my 2% capacity to be attracted to anyone, my type is like 90% women, 5% pretty men and 5% men you would swear are super fucking manly, and never questioned being straight and cis, but are now suddenly *stressed* that they can't figure out why their attraction to me [fully socially interpreted as a woman and labelled that way up until relatively recently] feels incredibly fucking gay
#you are a straight man correct? Yes. Attracted to someone you view as a woman correct? Yes... But you are afraid that makes you gay?#Afraid is a strong word but also stop asking stupid questions#The end result is I tend to date a lot of men who either then realize they are women or bi or gay and I am there when they are taking out#the messiest parts of that on whoever they are with at the time#and on one hand it means I created a space that made them feel safe enough to self examine#but on the other hand I'm their last stop when the fallout hits#OR they just realize they find the expectations put on them for masculinity to be really oppressive even negligent or abusive#I would say I need to adjust my strategy and stop trying to 'woo' men the same way I don't actually -flirt- with women#but I have already solved this problem by refusing to date ever again#The retrospective is funny though#The problem is I am attracted to men in a gay way and to women in a gay way but no one tells you the consequence of that and looking#like a pretty butch is that it really confuses the straight guys#Like why is this guy who's usually hmmm... as dom and masc as you would imagine suddenly in my lap and red and having entire feelings#about the way I am holding his hip? He doesn't knoww either and he's really pressed about it#And that thing messy lesbians do where they act jealous of you and also like they want to fuck you at the same time that looks like a red#flag from hell? Imagine dragging that out of unsuspecting straight guys -menTM-#They don't know why they are acting like that around me either but it's going to go one of two ways#either it will seem overtly threatening and aggressive to everyone involved including themselves or they'll have enough social sense#and tact to be playful about it but still not be sure if they are flirting or whether they like me at all#I have patience for one of those and unfortunately[?] it's the guy who's in my lap looks like he's being tortured and can't find his footin#not the guy telling me how much he's going to beat my ass at some game and I am going to like it or some macho bullshit#And I will be oblivious for the first 50% of it#because if there are gods they are cruel#He never realized he's actually the little spoon be nice and give him a minute#He can't tell me he likes me if he doesn't know he likes me but I opened a jar for him and asked him about his feelings and now he's warm#I actually ended up never dating many women at all because of weird lesbian mixed signals and things#At least not while they were women#I don't flirt or make friends I just decide that people are mine and start taking care of them [while respecting their autonomy and shit]#and I am starting to think this is how I make problems for myself#yes I am playing 5-d chess with gender and am now a he/they but it is not what it is cracked up to be
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
apology tour was SO needed omg
#and i thought i was president of the blitzø hateclub#like he NEEDED to hear that he was a bad partner and him being truthful doesnt excuse#him being a shoddy partner#like i am so so happy for stolas whether this thing is a one-night stand or a lasting relationship#he needed this SO MUCH#and i was 100% on verosika's side everything she said was correct#helluva boss#apology tour#i cant believe i'm saying this but i've never been happier that stolitz isn't a thing rn#also the motherf song by stolas was AMAZING bryce needs to sing like that more often
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
i need to expel the silly guys in my brain . but i forgot how to draw and writing is hard... much to think about
#vwoop.noises#I am thinking about cool war again. there is no tangible reason for this#Tge only rita summers stan in the whole world.. I think somethint could be done interesting abt her#I'm not sure whether shes bad bc of misogyny or bc none of the side characters were good#I hesitate to be mean bc Just a guy wrote that. Got no compensation for this. Etc etc. It's like conceptually advanced fanfic is my way of -#understanding this space#This being said.#It is very edgy for the sake of kt#And I want to play with your stock characters#Anyways Rita. Why is a child hanging out with the magic terrorists#They give off college dropout vibes but i think shes a little younger than like normal Knew them in highschool vibe. Hmm. Maybe#But regardless. She has to do highschooler chores . She has homework..#its just silly to me. Esp. bc shes just a goth little teenager#I think she's edgy on her own. Not even because the whole thing is edgy. She doesn't get toned down in my mind she believes she's#playing + winning 4D chess#In my beautiful mind palace she wasb rlly good friends w/ jessie b4 Average Tragic Backstory and is kind of like. sus abt the whole thing#very Yesterday was a terrible tragedy. You have classes today#As well as like. She's a bit younger and can cope a bit worse with everything. I think. As is her right as a goth teenager#she's just like. Angry.#Which is yknow. Why magic terrorism#but also w/ like jessie a) Her sibling is coping worse* and then b) Nobody says anything ever so as to not upset joey#*I have rewritten this whole thing in my mind Heart . He mitosis'd and then unmitosis'd as timeline course corrections and this is#quite difficult on a person.#but in the downtime.. shes just a bit silly....#magic terrorists and their princess of darkness (Also a magic terrorist)#I've also decided shes close w og just because I say so . They look similar and people r like Oh how sweet You are looking after yr little#sister. And she wants to do murder.#they both have dark hair; she dyes hers to look gother. and similar faces I Guess < The faceblinder but I'll decide when I draw them
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#ah yes you are correct mother i am absolutely the bitch for saying that if the customer that i am meeting at 4:30 am#as a favor specifically for you#isn't there to pick up their catering order by 5:10 am you need to come switch out with me#how silly of me to forget#or to dare want to get some sleep before work#im so fucking sick of this shit#all the shit work shit family shit#like howd i get here#i was born dealing with this shit and no one seems to know how to teach me to stop dealing with this shit#also two big reasons I'm so pissed are#a) bc of her negligence we were both there until well passed 1am working on said order#b) literally last night I was literally crying to her about how my routine and rituals have been shattered#bc of half the state being out of power#and she goes and fucks up my ability to re regulate thru reestablishing them with this shit#and then says *thats uncalled for* when I tell her i absolutely am not going to do this song and dance tomorrow#and that tomorrow im getting back into my rhythm whether she has to stay at work until 1 am or not#explicitly me
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
in what universe is Sam Smith "fat". like. when was that something that We™ apparently decided they were.
#Sam Smith#like... yes they've got a larger build and Body Fat™#but like. that's not what fatness is?#not inherently at least#whether you're saying it in a derogatory or a positive fashion it is just. not the correct turn of phrase.#yes they experience fatphobia obviously but that—again—doesn't speak so much to their actual body as it does how we view bodies#our language and terminology around body shapes and sizes is... not the greatest.#not the most comprehensive#(it reminds of when people call me 'skinny' TBH)#(like... I'm pretty objectively not—and that's okay!)#((TBH I had to stuggle for *decades* to properly internalize that it was Okay™))#((so for people to turn around and suddenly start saying I *am* 'skinny' is kinda... I get that you mean well but. do not. please. k. thnx)#(what I think these people are looking to express is that I've got curves without being Curvy™)#(if you know what I mean; if that makes any sense)#(and that they find my body attractive)#(which... if you're gonna make unsolicited comments about my body#just go the extra mile and say I'm hot okay? just say that.)#and that's what it really comes down to#perceived (conventional) attractiveness vs. material reality#ack I have so many thoughts but I've had a long day (a good day but a long one)#so y'know. y'know.#fatphobia tw#body shaming tw#body image tw#long tags
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
[LAYS ON THE FUCKING FLOOR] MY MOM LEFT THE GRAVY AND BUTTERNUT SQUASH SOUP SHE MADE YESTERDAY JUST OUT ON THE STOVETOP OVERNIGHT AND ALL DAY TODAY AND THEN TRIED TO FEED IT TO US
#HELLO!! HELLO!!!!#APPARENTLY SHE HAS A REPUTATION WITH WORK FRIENDS FOR BEING GROSS BECAUSE SHE'LL EAT YOGURT SHE BROUGHT FOR LUNCH 2 DAYS LATER#AFTER KEEPING IT IN A CUPBOARD AT ROOM TEMP#FUCKING??? HELLO??????#I AM ABSOLVED!! OF EVER CARING WHETHER MY MOM THINKS MY RISK ASSESSMENT IS CRAZY!! EVER AGAIN!!! HOLY SHIT!!!#I have in the last two years been transformed from a 'will probably eat last night's pizza' goblin to... Not That#by a couple of well placed foodborne illness psa posts on here actually#but TWO DAY OLD? YOGURT?? TURKEY GRAVY????????? THERE IS NO-- YOU ARE NOT IN THE ACCEPTABLE GREY ZONE OF GROSS ANYMORE#I AM LEGITIMATELY CONCERNED ABOUT YOUR JUDGEMENT#DAIRY???!!!???????? WET!! MEAT SLIMES!!????????? MOTHER.#she SAYS people do it in england and she got desensitized and now she's like 'idk I haven't gotten sick yet haha' dude no! no!!#I am unwilling to believe They Do It In England Routinely without hard evidence that is a DAMNING accusation to level at an entire culture#even one infamous for being food criminals#maybe your husband and his family are just nasty#I can't believe! I actually cannot believe this!! I feel like I've gone insane!!!#like this is not 'I'm 100% correct but could be accused of being paranoid or uptight anyway' this is just... beyond the pale#about me#irl frens#(and family)
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
More screenshots (bonus, managed to find Bull a shirt and don't know how to feel about that)
#anyway i continue to Lavellan post because i did some stuff and I'm tired now anyway. thinking about the beginning of the game and#how he's mostly leaning into the herald bullshit because he thinks it'll help him belong here and make people like him and how#devastatingly it's going to hit him after in your heart shall burn (I'm basically leaning into it as much as#possible without establishing him as faithful since it's more difficult to make Leliana pope that way but in my head#he took every 'yeah I'm herald I'm heralding so much andraste right now' option besides one with cass and one with Leliana)#like. he doesn't even really believe it but most people either like hearing it or if they react negatively it's in a way that still#acknowledges him as in charge so he'll roll with that. but then. everything in YHTB happens and it's just like. Oh. Oh Shit. like#it was this mix of bullshitting for fun and saying what people wanted to hear and kind of believing that maybe he was chosen by#Something at least. and like. it's not like he didn't do anything on his own or at least without any special abilities but then#The classic seeing all that be swept aside. realizing how this is going to be remembered because it's already happening. maybe#he should have known that the second he was asked if there was room for more among his gods.#but then. what do you expect. his first memory is being discarded (that's not entirely what it was but that's how his child brain#precessed it) and practically going feral because of it and then. having So Much catching up to do when it came to. basically every#aspect of being a person#and like. he was accepted along with Rella but that still gets to you. especially since. sure he didn't fully understand what it means to#be pitied but he could still recognize that from others. could still want to prove he was Better Than That. could still want to shatter tha#sheet of glass between himself and seemingly everyone else (even Rella to be honest. if only because she almost left him behind too). how#would he not lean into being seen as something special. whether he fully believed the narrative others were spinning or not#i dunno i see a lot of people talking about their Lavellan pushing back against the narrative from the start but i kind of like the#idea of going along with it. thinking it won't get that far and surely he can correct it if it does. he's in charge after all. right? only#to get hit harder than an avalanche by the realization that he's not in control after all. he can direct as many forces as he wants#but he can't change how he'll be remembered. how he's already being remembered. and he contributed to it too? i dunno his specific#combination of pride and insecurity and need to just Belong. to just belong as himself. is. compelling#If anyone is reading this Ive seen posts about all Lavellans having the same personality but no one's elaborated? am i just doing that?#i actually want to know. you know. assuming anyone is reading this.#i dunno just thinking about his continuous need to prove himself for so many reasons (partially because of Rella too since#yeah Rella is a mage but not the first or anything. she's just there because people knew she had nowhere else to go). okay I'll shut up now#but yeah what is this Standard Lavellan Personality i keep hearing about?#original posts#but like. something something he's being discarded again but he understands it this time and he can't fight it and just
0 notes
Text
the reason intersex people need to be visible and at the forefront of every queer's activism is because we are completely devoid of autonomy when it comes to identifying ourselves. no matter how hard we try to speak up on how we are treated, how we are dehumanized, how we are refused our right to say who we are, it falls through the cracks because of how many people continue to diminish our issues, and espouse intersexist beliefs.
when i speak up about being transfemme, and a trans girl, it's not because i'm trying to step on people's toes or speak about something i don't understand. i speak up about it because this is the life i've lived. it doesn't matter if strangers see me this way or not, this is how i've been my entire life. whether or not someone knows i was technically born AMAB and then had my gender "corrected" shouldn't matter.
trans people do not only come in binary sexes- just like gender, physical sex is also not a binary. i am an intersex trans girl , even if my agab didn't stay AMAB forever. I would be an intersex trans girl regardless of whether or not they assigned me male at birth, because my experience with womanhood and femininity is that they've always been held away from me, way farther than it would ever be possible for me to reach.
i've had to take estrogen & progesterone HRT in the past in order to "correct" my masculine features in order to look like and be a girl "correctly". the subject of my body and my gender has never been something i've been able to control. my whole live i've just been told that i'm a girl wrong, and that i need to "Fix" it.
boyhood or manhood weren't options either, that was held away from me with a 10 foot pole as well. i've had to transition into gender, itself, because i was forbidden to be a boy or a girl. i was always too sensitive or soft to be a real boy. gender as a concept has been a source of control and degredation for me. i had to transition into both manhood and womanhood in order to have control over how i identify. even now when i talk about manhood and being a man, people tell me that i'm not a trans man because of how i look. i'm routinely denied manhood, I "have" to be a trans woman only to some.
due to my intersex condition, i'm a trans man and a trans woman, transfemme and transmasc, but people struggle to accept this. there's no reason for people to give me hell about these parts of myself, and yet people still do. intersex awareness matters because we fight to be seen as the people we are. we struggle to have our identities be addressed correctly. we are in the same fight as trans individuals, and we owe it to intersex trans men, women, and people to help people understand that trans folks come in all different types of bodies, and that biological sex is not a binary, either.
we have to fight for each other's autonomy. for all of us. together we are stronger, louder, and braver.
#intersex#lgbtqia#lgbtq#lgbt#queer#transfemme#transfeminine#transfem#trans girl#trans woman#trans lady#nonbinary#trans#transgender#enby#genderqueer#about us#transmasculine#ftm#trans man#our writing
10K notes
·
View notes
Text
voicelines about you: as their lover ! (part 2)
featuring: sunday, aventurine, blade (+ black swan, acheron) [ part 1: dan heng, jing yuan, gepard, kafka, jingliu. ]
notes: well. the long awaited part 2 is here! (i took absolutely wayyy too long to finish this but a lovely anon requested the penacony cast so i just waited until now haha) stay tuned for either a future aventurine fic or a sunday fic tho; reblogs are appreciated! main masterlist.
Sunday
About [Name]: Ah, you speak of my beloved. [Name] has managed to strike your interest as well? Heh, I'm joking. You aren't that type of person, no? ….But yes, my lover truly is quite stellar, if not incomparable. I doubt I'd find anyone in the universe as lovely as I do them.
About [Name]: Smitten Robin often jokes about how my eyes change whenever I see them. ‘Softens like the smitten man you are,’ she says. Well, my sister is hardly wrong about matters of the heart, and to be fair, her words are indeed correct. While I cannot be with them every second of the day, despite my only wish to do so…. I suppose this much is fine. At the very least, this bewitched version of myself shall ward any that dare take [Name] away from me.
About [Name]: Preparation. …My mansion has everything [Name] shall ever desire. As for I, what I only desire is them alone, and for them to be right by my side. When the time is right, what's mine shall also be theirs, and none shall ever separate the two of us again. Should anyone attempt it, well, there's a reason my mansion is built the way it is.
Aventurine
About [Name]: [Name], [Name], [Name].... I see that you too have an eye for priceless treasures. Unfortunately for you, this particular one is already mine to behold. Mm, I wonder how my lover must be faring right now…. Missing them is truly, horribly debilitating.
About [Name]: Unworthy Whenever I think of [Name] being with me, of all people… Sometimes, the thought is unbearable. To think they would care for someone like me…. How truly lucky I am. Or maybe it's the other way around? Hehe, take a guess.
About Topaz: Contradictory Topaz and [Name] get along fairly well, despite her rather obvious dislike for me. Nonetheless, I suppose I can understand why. My lover is irresistibly charming~ Now, does this make me jealous, I wonder…. How about we bet on that?
Blade
About [Name]: Though this sword may be battered and broken, if you harbor any intention of harm towards them, I will not hesitate to brandish this blade.
About [Name]: Mara Infliction When afflicted with mara, the senses are ravaged ceaselessly, muddying the mind—being unable to distinguish ally from foe. This is my path. And yet their face is clear, pure amidst the carnage, alleviating the haze for but a moment. My mind may be overridden with hatred, but I will never forget that feeling of salvation.
(BONUS: Kafka’s Voiceline about [Name] !) About [Name]: Truly A Shame Bladie’s little darling, hm? Definitely a wonder, that one, taming him so easily. Those two are definitely an interesting case, that's for sure. Scary, marastruck Blade and them…. truly a shame. Even I know just how the ending of that particular script will end.
Acheron
About [Name]: …They are my lover, yes. Hm? Tell you more about them? Heh, I think you'd have better luck asking [Name] instead of me. I probably wouldn't even know where to begin.
About [Name]: Keeping Memories Despite the fact of my memories being in less than the best condition, [Name] always tells me about all the exciting things they've come across, whether it be delicious food from various planets, or even the most mundane things like the sound of the rushing water, the sight of fireflies in the night. They truly make everything worth remembering.
(BONUS: Black Swan’s Voiceline about [Name] !) About [Name]: Eye Of The Storm Ah, you speak of that Galaxy Ranger's companion…. The abyss that is her consciousness seems to only become calm in the face of them, akin to the eye of the storm. A shining light in the middle of nothingness—that is something that even she cannot let go of. No wonder Miss Acheron is quite taken with them.
Black Swan
About [Name]: The memories of Memokeepers are sorted into various categories by their importance. As my lover, my memories of them hold the greatest value of all. Such memories…. even if the Remembrance wishes for me to hand them over, I doubt I will ever allow it.
About [Name]: Dancing My proficiency in the act of dancing is all thanks to my continued practice with [Name] on our shared time together. Fufu, ‘dates,’ if you will. Every moment I spend in their arms, swaying to the beat of the music at every turn… those are the memories I wish to forever retain.
About Acheron: Indebted One time, Miss Acheron managed to get lost in the middle of the Reverie Hotel’s halls... as usual. [Name] came across her then, and proceeded to have a lovely chat with her. I owe her a debt for keeping my lover company as I was preoccupied with some matters the Garden of Recollection entrusted to me to relay to the family. Next time, perhaps I should invite her over for some dinner with [Name]....
end notes thanks for sticking around the part 2 (for the ogs who read pt 1) and do look forward to more HSR content in the future! also did i say i love aventurine
© 𝐈𝐂𝐄𝐔𝐍𝐇𝐈𝐄 : do not repost, copy, or plagiarize my work.
#mhie's spirals#hsr aventurine#hsr blade#hsr black swan#hsr acheron#hsr sunday#hsr x reader#hsr x gender neutral reader#hsr x you#aventurine x reader#sunday x reader#black swan x reader#acheron x reader#blade x reader#aventurine x you#aventurine hsr#aventurine honkai star rail#sunday x you#black swan honkai star rail#blade x gender neutral reader#blade x you#sunday x y/n
3K notes
·
View notes
Note
Hi!!! I'm currently absolutely DYING of sickness, and i was wondering if i could request smth with alastor with a sick reader since im stuck in bed til further notice and very sad lolsies anyways, i hope you have a good day!!<3
a/n: hii my love!! i hope you have a speedy recovery and feel better soon <3333
⋆。゚☁︎。⋆。 ゚☾ ゚。⋆
Had he known you would have turned out so miserable, Alastor would have just given you his damn jacket whether you liked it or not.
Instead he's stuck babysitting; watching your fever, making sure you're drinking enough water; even keeping the time between your medications.
He had, of course, offered you his coat after he saw you coming out of the club with Angel Dust with clothes not suited for the chilly night. And you, stubborn as ever, refused it saying it would be too embarrassing to risk ending up in the newsletter.
"Imagine the headlines! You know Vox is always watching!" You had argued when he held out his coat for you to take. He could only smile indignantly at you.
Thinking back, he probably should have used a more authoritative tone. Then again, he would rather claw his eyes out than give you the idea that he cares about you.
He has no time to regret his decisions anymore, now busy with making sure you don't get worse with what little medicine there is in Hell.
"Your congestion sounds just terrible, my dear!"
You scowl at him from your place. "Gee, thanks."
"You really should take better care of yourself. Parading around in such thin clothes all night? You were bound to get sick eventually!"
"Like I need you telling me what to do," you grumble.
"I am just saying," he shrugs. "I do hate to see you so unwell."
You perk up a little, curiously looking at him as he perches on the end of the bed. "You do?"
He bites the inside of his cheek at the little glimmer in your eyes. You're not in the right headspace at the moment. It would be wrong to think you're looking at him so hopefully for any real reason.
"Don't push it," he laughs, scooting closer to you on the bed to feel your forehead.
You owlishly blink at him while he gauges your temperature with a little jazz tune in his throat. "What's your verdict, doctor?"
He grins down at you, a warmth behind it. "Bedrest would do you some good."
You frown, fluffing the blanket and diving beneath it. "Easier said than done when it's so damn cold."
Alastor regards you for a moment, watching you shiver. No, he really shouldn't let such a sight tug at his heartstrings. But his hands are moving faster than he can think, and his coat is slipping off his shoulders before he knows what he's doing.
You get engulfed by his coat, already warm from his body.
"You should get some rest," he tells you, voice missing its usual cheer. Gathering his staff, he gets ready to leave you be.
"Wait, Alastor!" The demon raises a brow at you as you hug his jacket around you, smiling all the while. He feels disgustingly warm and fuzzy inside at how content you seem.
This is correct, he thinks. His jacket slung over you—this is how it should have been all this time.
"Thank you."
He reaches down to tug at the collar, pulling it tight around you. "Just recover quickly so I can stop babysitting," he mumbles with a growing smile.
~
taglist: @the-lake-is-calling @dragons-and-dwarves-are-nice @averylonelysea @bri22222 @cxrsedwxrlds @amarokofficial @anae-naea-zacheria @for-hearthand-home @fantasy-is-best @angixyc @th3-st4r-gur1 @i-am-nonbinary-bean-deal-with-it (send an ask to be added!)
#alastor x reader#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel x reader#alastor#hazbin alastor#hazbin x reader#alastor fanfic#alastor fanfiction#alastor fic#alastor headcanons#alastor hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel alastor#alastor x you#hazbin hotel fanfiction#hazbin#hazbin hotel headcanons#faye's thoughts — ☁
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
MEDDLE ABOUT
SYN. Being co-stars with your ex-boyfriend of three months is basically hell; or at least, that's what you think. AKA: Sukuna wants you back, whether he's acting or not.
TAGS. actor AU, fem!Reader, mean!Sukuna, exes to lovers, forced proximity, sharing a cigarette, smoking, arguing, eventual smut, Sukuna likes to shut you up with his dick, cockwarming, answering the phone during séx, orgasm denial, dacryphilia, porn w/o plot, use of pet names: baby, sweetheart, pretty girl, my dear (mockingly)
WC. 5.4k (please read anyway 😞)
AN. requested by anon (you didn't specify any genre, so i just freestyled 🤷♀️), animated dividers by @/cafekitsune; i'm a sucker for actor AUs; available on ao3; MDNI
“I know you wanna kiss me,” you smiled, leaning closer to Sukuna’s face. Your noses were barely apart, and you couldn’t tell where his breath ended, and where yours started. To be honest, this was far more intimate than any other kiss scene you ever had to film.
“Yeah?” Sukuna grinned, getting equally as close. “And what’re you going to do about that, pretty girl?”
“. . .Fucking slap you, that’s what.”
“CUT!” The director yelled, groaning in exasperation. “C’mon, people. I know it’s been a long day, but put your differences aside for the sake of one movie, will ya? When you receive your paycheck, you’ll regret all of this ‘huffing and puffing’ you two are both doing right now.”
You exhaled, pulling away from Sukuna. It’s not that you couldn’t remember your correct lines, it’s just. . . You couldn’t take it anymore. Being in the same room as him, breathing in the same air as him, starring in the same movie with him. Fuck, you hated this.
You and Sukuna had broken up exactly three months ago despite having what seemed like a pretty healthy relationship. Seemed is the key word.
Of course, you two had your ups and downs, like an ordinary couple, but what differentiated you two from a normal couple was the fact that you guys both juggled busy careers as an actor and actress. Being booked with interviews, PR stunts, and in general, movies, you and Sukuna didn’t have the ability to spend much time together. And, as if that wasn’t enough, there was constantly a multitude of women on his arm during movie premieres. Yeah, you knew those were all for PR, but still, it hurt to see your boyfriend standing with a woman that wasn’t you every day.
At first, you thought you could take it. Being an actress yourself, you had your fair share of rumors and made up scandals. But it came to a point where you couldn’t take it anymore. You and Sukuna broke up, consequently, and fans immediately voiced their opinions and concerns, bombarding Twitter with trending tags, and posting videos on several apps. The internet had been obsessed with you guys as a couple since the first movie you two co-starred in—which was years ago—so their complaints definitely weren’t for naught.
Originally, you thought that your relationship with Sukuna would end on good terms, but boy, oh boy, were you wrong. Sukuna, just mere days after your breakup, was spotted by paparazzi walking around the city with his arm around a girl you definitely did not recognize as one of his current co-stars. And to make matters worse, he had the audacity to hit you up and ask if he could come over to your penthouse right after.
Men, am I right?
You two may or may not have slept together as exes a few times after your inevitable argument about him and that new girl, but rest assured, you did eventually break things off permanently. Well, you thought you did. As if by fate, you and Sukuna were casted as co-stars in an up-and-coming romance movie that had your fans just dying in anticipation of finally being able to see their favorite (broken up) couple together on screen again.
To be frank, you were originally going to pass up the role as the female lead—seeing as your luck had landed you as co-stars with Sukuna—but your manager apparently really, really wanted you to work on the film, saying things like Think of how elated your fans will be and It’s an adaptation from a book that made millions and Just imagine all of the PR and promoting you could do. It took a while of convincing—and coercing—to get you to finally agree to the role since, after all, PR was the main reason for your and Sukuna’s breakup. But, honestly, you would be lying if you said there weren’t any feelings left for your ex-boyfriend, Sukuna.
“I think we should all take a breather,” Sukuna began, jeering, “before someone gets all hot and bothered by just being on the same set as me. Wouldn’t you agree?” Sukuna turned to you, an expression on his face that just made you want to punch him in the nose.
“‘Hot and bothered’, seriously? Don’t make me laugh.” You rolled your eyes, crossing your arms over your chest.
Sukuna tilted his head to the side, grinning. “Do you think I’m joking? I could feel the way your heart was racing earlier, when we had to shoot that hugging in the rain scene. Just admit it, this isn’t acting for you.”
He was definitely self-projecting, you scowled just by the thought of it.
“Oh, don’t give me that look, sweetheart. We all know how you really feel,” Sukuna teased, leaning down to your eye-level. His breath fanned your reddening ear as he whispered, “You want me so bad it makes you look fucking stupid.”
And when he pulled away, Sukuna added one last remark, “I know it’s been a long three months for you. Say, how’s that blondie treating you, hm? I bet his dick is as small as his future in acting.”
“Ryomen, just stop.” You shook your head. “It’s not like that with him, and you know that. Just leave me alone.”
You shoved at his chest as you walked off set, your assistants following you promptly with water bottles and towels.
In all honesty, you remembered it like it happened yesterday. Before you and Sukuna became boyfriend and girlfriend, your first meeting was in a movie that you both starred in as the female and male lead. It was a romance movie, of course, that was about a couple meeting on an island while both on individual vacations. You two spent most of your days on set in swimsuits and bikinis, consuming fake alcoholic beverages, and, consequently, sleeping together—after the tension just grew unbearable.
On and off camera, Sukuna had been growing an attraction towards you. I mean, who could blame him? You two had to be near each other while being basically half-naked. And, if your pretty face wasn’t enough to beguile Sukuna, your ass definitely was. From the moment he shook hands with you at your first meeting as co-stars, he knew he had to have you—acting or not.
That movie was the start of the skyrocketing of both your and Sukuna’s career in acting. Fans quickly noted how much chemistry the two of you had together, and how well you two could act out emotions and intimate scenes. What the audience didn’t know, though, was that you and Sukuna had started seeing each other a few weeks after shooting together.
Sukuna had invited over the whole cast and team for drinks after a successful movie premiere, and you two ended up talking and conversing in his kitchen whilst a little under the influence. You two hit it off, and learned that being an aspiring actor wasn’t the only thing you two had in common. One glass turned into two, and two turned into stumbling into Sukuna’s bedroom after everyone had responsibly ordered a cab home.
Waking up the morning after, and deciding it wasn’t just going to be a one night stand, you and Sukuna thus began your new relationship. At first, you two avoided being spotted in public together, but it came to a point where your relationship just couldn’t be hidden anymore and you both decided to go public. The internet responded almost immediately with cheers, enthusiasm, and occasionally, expressions showing how un-surprised they were. I mean, you two had been shipped together almost constantly; making it official was almost expected.
Years passed, the honeymoon stage was over, your careers were more demanding and busy than they had ever been, and, well, you know the rest.
—
“Fancy seeing you here.”
A grimace immediately made its way onto your face at the sound of Sukuna’s voice calling out to you from behind.
“Hilarious,” you deadpanned, turning to face Sukuna as he sat down beside you and slung an arm around the back of the couch, “I was hoping the next time I saw you would be at your funeral.”
“A little harsh, don’t you think?” chided Sukuna, as he brought out a cigarette and lit it.
You crossed your arms over your chest, leaning back against the couch. “What do you want?”
“Isn’t it obvious?” Sukuna leaned his face closer to yours, his eyes running down your face and naturally drifting to your lips.
“Unless you’re being your usual asshole-self, and here to annoy me in my dressing room, I’m afraid not.”
After you stormed off set, the director decided it was best to just call it a day and continue filming tomorrow. You went outside for a bit to get some fresh air, before deciding to return to your dressing room and get unready. Stripping down and putting on nothing but your robe, you had sat yourself down on the couch and picked up a magazine, planning on spending a few minutes relaxing before making your way home. Sukuna barging in, despite being off the clock, was something you definitely weren’t expecting. He wasn’t supposed to be here, and if someone found out. . .
“You’ll be in a lot of trouble if my makeup artist comes in here and sees you,” you commented. “Go smoke somewhere else.”
At this, Sukuna’s eyes flickered up to your own, and he removed the cigarette from his lips before blowing out the smoke right in front of your face. Your nose scrunched up, as if on instinct, and Sukuna booped your nose with a shit-eating grin on his face.
“I swear,” you began, snatching the cigarette out of Sukuna’s hands, “if I don’t kill you, I hope these will.” Now was your turn to put the cigarette between your lips. You inhaled, and took a deep breath. But, only moments after, the cigarette was out of your hands and abruptly stubbed on a nearby ashtray.
Sukuna looked at you with an intent look on his face. “As much as I find that hot, I’d rather I be the one damaging my lungs. Not you.”
“Looking out for little old me? How cute,” you smiled, your tone sarcastic. “I see you’re not over us, yet, hm? Did that new girl change your mind?”
You leaned closer to Sukuna, your shoulders brushing ever so slightly.
As soon as you mentioned that other chick, Sukuna rolled his eyes. “Oh, please. It was nothing, we didn’t even hold hands. C’mon, all we did was sit next to each other at a party, and now you’re on my ass about her?”
You shrugged, picking up the magazine you had previously discarded and flipping through the pages with faux interest. “Oh, really? Didn’t look that way to me. You two sure seemed buddy-buddy.”
“Like hell we did. Fuck, do you want me to bring up that twig you were with last week? Kid’s got no meat on his arms. Can’t even call him a man. Is that seriously how low you’re willing to go, babe?” Sukuna scoffed at your lack of attention to him. “Shit’s even worse than a downgrade.”
“You can think that all you want. But I definitely disagree.” You struggled to stifle a giggle.
Sukuna, furrowing his brows, narrowed his eyes at you. “The fuck do you mean by that? Don’t tell me you’ve seen his dick.”
“I dunno, have I?” You turned to Sukuna, meeting his gaze with an equal amount of irritation.
“Must’ve been pretty small, though, if you can’t even remember it,” Sukuna pressed, leaning closer to you, your noses touching, before pulling away. “Whatever, this is boring. Say, how about we get back to where we left off, and practice that kissing scene, hm? I think it’s a great idea.”
“Ryomen, let’s not. You know we’re done. Been done. We’re through.”
“You don’t really mean that.”
“Oh, is it not obvious? I think it was pretty obvious when you had the nerve to get with a new girl just days after we broke up. And then you have the balls to call me right after the paparazzi catches you two. Really, Sukuna? I don’t mind the idea of us ending on neutral terms, but . . . 48 hours? Two days after we broke up, and you’re already fucking some girl? Way to go, Sukuna.”
“Don’t get ahead of yourself there, baby. We didn’t even kiss, did you see any pictures of us kissing? No. And, besides, it’s called provocation. Honestly, you should be praising me, because it worked in the end, didn’t it? I came ‘crawling back’ like one of your little bitch boys, and what happened? Oh, I remember; you let me right the fuck in to your apartment.”
As much as you hated to admit it, you couldn’t deny Sukuna. He was right. And, just the mere thought of what you two did after he hit you up brought heat to your cheeks.
The very same night after pictures of Sukuna and that new girl started circulating around the internet, Sukuna decided to text you:
hey pretty girl,
you up?
You were drying yourself off with a towel when you received two notifications on your phone, and when you saw the contact name, you frowned and turned off your phone without giving a response. Minutes after, there was a ring on your doorbell, and when you checked the camera, lo and behold, stood none other than the last pink-haired man you wanted to see that evening.
When you opened the door, wearing nothing other than a towel around your still dripping body, Sukuna couldn’t help but shamelessly check you out, deciding then and there that this definitely wasn’t going to be the end of your relationship. Of course, an argument ensued soon after, because that’s what life was like dating a dick like Sukuna. Luckily for you, however, Sukuna’s bulge in his pants was bigger than his ego, and so it made up for all of the playful bullying and teasing remarks that he frequently gave.
Sukuna—because he wasn’t born yesterday—knew his looks and charms fairly well, and often used them as a weapon or bargaining chip. That’s why, after you spent a minute or two berating and yelling at Sukuna near your front door, it only took the man one look into your eyes and one sultry comment to have you both stumbling into the . . . bedroom? No, you two had been apart for two days too long, and just decided to utilize your expensive kitchen counters for purposes completely unrelated to cooking.
The next morning, you two woke up—after getting just half an hour of sleep—and didn’t untangle from each other’s limbs until your manager called you nearly a hundred times, and forced you to get up and attend some interview or something. That, however, was not your last night with Sukuna. You two met up—intentionally or not—within the same week, whether it be at interviews or just random outings, and meddled with the other until one of you would fold (usually Sukuna) and consequently do something you would end up not fully regretting the next morning.
This affair continued until you finally came to your senses and blocked Sukuna out from your life in all ways possible. But, due to his bank account, Sukuna did end up purchasing multiple different phones just to be able to contact you. You may or may not have given in a few times, but in the end, you did end up leaving Sukuna for good.
“Reminiscing, are you? It’s okay, I’ve been doing that every night since you left the penthouse,” Sukuna laughed, noticing the way you went silent. You hated the way he referred to his place as The penthouse, and not, simply, his penthouse because, to be frank, for the years you both spent as a couple, you practically lived together despite having individual residences.
“What the hell, Sukuna. Just—Why are you even—?”
Sukuna cut you off, rolling his eyes. “I find it pretty hard to believe that not a single part of you misses me. Don’t lie; lying is a sin, y’know.”
“Sukuna—Excuse me? Don’t give me that shit. ‘Lying is a sin’ my ass. You must have to ask for God’s forgiveness pretty often, then. I can’t believe you want to call me a sinner, I mean, just—just look at you! You’re no saint, either, and you know that damn well.”
Sukuna raised his hands in defense, humoring you. “Woah, looks like I’ve been caught,” he laughed, before getting a little more serious. “But, don’t try to avoid the fact that you’re not innocent. Okay, we broke up due to not being able to make time for each other, and because of how much women I had to be around. Yeah, I get that. But it’s not like I was the only one taking up PR stunts. You did the same, too, didn’t you? So don’t try and paint me out to be the bad guy, when, at the end of the day, we did the same fucking thing.”
Irritated, you pinched the space between your brows. “I barely have any energy to say something to your stupid face right now. We broke up because of that, but also because of how much of a fucking dick you were and are. I knew you weren’t a total angel when we got together but—”
“Look. Do you want a nice guy?”
“. . .”
“Don’t feel pressured to answer, baby. We all know how you really feel.”
“Go. to. Hell. Sukuna. Seriously. This? Again? Do you even know how much of an ass you are? I should deserve an award for putting up with your shit for so long, God—”
“Yeahh, just keep talking,” said Sukuna in a teasing manner, as he leaned back against the couch, spreading his legs apart. You had never wanted to sit somewhere so bad.
“Are you fucking kidding me—mmph!”
You would’ve continued yelling and cursing Sukuna out for being such a dick had he not roughly pressed his lips against yours, immediately shutting you up. Because you still had some self-respect left, you fought back, throwing weak punches at his chest; but when Sukuna caught your wrists in his hands, you knew it was game over. Your muffled complaints soon turned to whimpers and sighs, as you shut your eyes and let your body do the talking.
Minute after minute, you gradually turned to putty in Sukuna’s hands. Fuck, as much as you hated to admit it, you had truly missed this. The feeling of his large, coarse hands roaming your body, tracing your curves, the feeling of his soft, but unruly hair under your fingertips, but most importantly, the feeling of his lips on yours.
At this point, you couldn’t even remember why the two of you broke up.
“Sukuna,” you murmured, pulling away for a moment to breathe. “We’re not together anymore. We shouldn’t—”
“Shouldn’t?” repeated Sukuna, eager to get back to where you left off. “Are you in a relationship with someone else? Am I in a relationship with someone else? No, and no. So enlighten me, my dear, why should we stop?”
“. . .” It was like he was challenging you, except, this time, it was a battle you could afford to lose. You wanted Sukuna, you really did. But admitting it was the hard part. You chewed on your bottom lip, contemplating every outcome, as Sukuna continued to stare at you with so much desire you could practically feel it.
“Are you hesitating because,” Sukuna paused, “—because you fucked someone else while I was gone?”
You sighed, swallowing the lump in your throat; you had never been more conflicted in your life. Placing your hands on Sukuna’s shoulders, you pushed back until Sukuna was sitting on the couch, and you were sitting on top of him—seated on his lap. As if on instinct, his hands made their way from your hips to the curve of your ass.
Sukuna gripped the globes of fat and muscle with a purpose, and let out an exaggerated groan at the missed feeling of you practically sitting on his dick. You were wearing nothing but a dainty, silky robe, and you clearly didn’t cross it over your chest too well, as Sukuna could see almost everything he had been missing out on during the past few months.
“Don’t even think about lying to me. I can feel you throbbing on my thigh, y’know.”
“. . .And?” You raised a brow; whispering in Sukuna’s ear, “What about it?”
Biting your lip, you let your hands wander up and down Sukuna’s neck, the spot you knew he liked you touching. When you broke things off with Sukuna, you didn’t know you could miss being able to trace his tattoos as bad as you did.
“Oh?” asked Sukuna. But when his fingers wandered up your robe, there was a sudden change in Sukuna’s demeanor, and he sucked in a breath.
“Adorable,” you laughed. “Cat got your tongue?”
“Shit, baby,” Sukuna groaned, “I bet you were expecting me to come and visit your little dressing room, huh. Even planned ahead and gave me a little surprise. Cheeky thing.”
Just seconds earlier, Sukuna’s fingers had been teasingly ghosting where you wanted him most, but when he noticed the lack of underwear you had on, he nearly lost it. You clearly weren’t making it easy for Sukuna to stay composed, he was sure of that much. Despite all of his belittling and teasing remarks, he definitely wasn’t as unaffected as he let himself seem to be.
“We’ve just been apart for so, so long.” You looked into Sukuna’s eyes, a faux pout on your lips as you looped your arms around his neck and pressed your tits up against his chest. “Can you blame me?”
“Fuck, girl,” Sukuna kissed his teeth. “You’re dripping wet. All for me?”
“Who the fuck else?”
Sukuna’s fingers danced around your entrance, collecting your slick as you pressed your thighs together, trapping his hand between your legs (not like he was complaining, though; that was probably the closest to Heaven Sukuna would ever get in his lifetime). “Mmm, that’s what I like to hear.”
It wasn’t a surprise when you pressed your lips against Sukuna’s, bringing him in for another zealous kiss. In an effort to get impossibly closer, your body curved into his, like you were puzzle pieces molded and created just for each other. You two moved in sync, as if you had both rehearsed this before; but, in truth, you two had just made out too many times to count, so kissing Sukuna was basically like breathing air. You needed it to survive, and, it was light work. What more could you say?
The tension and lust between you two grew, and your dressing room soon filled with the sound of sensual desire, moans and quiet gasps, and the creaking of the framework of your unfortunate couch, which had the misfortune of being beneath the two of you.
From the moment you had begun straddling his lap, you had pretended not to notice the growing erection below you; but, by now, it was pretty hard to ignore the bulge pressing against your ass. It was like, during the months you two spent apart, Sukuna’s dick was growing even larger than before. You didn’t remember it being so big. And, just the sight of it was enough to make you lick your lips in fear? Anticipation? . . .Definitely a mix of both.
As Sukuna made a show of removing his belt and pants, he grinned at the evident look of unfamiliarity on your face. “Scared?”
“Of course not,” you quipped, trying to put up a front, but your body betrayed you, displaying otherwise.
“Naturally,” Sukuna mocked, “that’s why I can practically feel your arousal, right?”
You bit your lip, “Shut up.”
Sukuna laughed, pushing the ends of your robe up to rest on your hips, and sliding his hands to your ass, squeezing each cheek with an equal amount of force. Damn, thought Sukuna, he had missed his favorite girls.
“Just because we haven’t done this in a while doesn’t mean you have to be afraid of it. C’mon,” Sukuna slowly repositioned and lowered your hips and spread your legs apart, easing his dick through your cunt, “there’s nothing to be shy about. I know you’ve been missing this.”
It was true, you and Sukuna hadn’t fucked in three whole months, and your body was definitely starting to forget how he felt. The feeling of your walls stretching to accommodate Sukuna’s length and size burned pleasurably, and you bit your lip to stifle a moan, which, in turn, just came out as a whimper instead.
Bracing yourself, you planted both palms on Sukuna’s broad shoulders as your lashes fluttered and your eyes shut tight. “So—nngh—So big, Sukuna. God.”
“Bet you���re real glad you decided to accept this role, after all, huh.”
Your eyes snapped open, and you glared at Sukuna. “Will you just shut—oh!”
Just as you were about to yell at Sukuna, he decided it was the absolute perfect time to give a rough thrust; and you could’ve sworn you felt him in your womb. Throughout all the years you two had been together, you rarely had the opportunity to actually sit on his dick, and, now that you had the chance, you realized how full you felt in this position compared to how you two usually fucked. Sukuna knew you liked it rough, but this . . . was like nothing you had experienced before.
Sukuna—laughing—leaned down just enough to whisper in your ear, “You were saying?”
“Fuck,” you gritted your teeth. “Just move, Sukuna, goddamnit. What’s the holdup? Don’t tell me the late twenties are catching up to your libido.”
“Ha! in your dreams. I was just thinking of a new way we could have fun. Let’s see, just how long can you go without moving, hm?”
You gulped. “W-What? Why would you—?”
“Because it’s exciting, and spices up things. Don’t you think so?”
“. . .”
As the minutes idly passed by, you grew hot and bothered, and exasperated. You couldn’t believe Sukuna was making you do this. Nearly ninety days you two spent apart, and now that you had gotten back together, he had the audacity to leave you high and dry? In a final attempt at getting any satisfaction, you moved to roll your hips, desperate to create any amount of friction to free you from this everlasting state between Heaven and Hell; but two rough hands abruptly caught you in motion, and swiftly held you down.
“Ah, ah, ah,” tutted Sukuna, in a mocking tone. “Did I say you could move?”
Clearly frustrated, you let out a whine; but as your hands move to give punches against Sukuna’s chest, he catches your wrists in his hands with ease, an evil smile on his face, like a predator that had successfully cornered their prey and was just seconds away from latching their teeth in.
The belt was already pretty loose, so when one of the sleeves on your robe slipped down your shoulder, revealing your bare chest, no one was that surprised.
“Oh?” Sukuna began. “What have we here?” His scarlet eyes roamed up and down your figure, as his grip on your wrists turned almost deathly.
“You . . . bastard,” you—suddenly feeling a bit shy—tried to tug your wrists out of his grasps, in order to cover yourself up, but your attempts were futile. “Let go of me—hnngh, shit.”
Your back arched, body curving closer to Sukuna’s as his lips abruptly wrapped around one of your already hard nipples, catching you off guard. You had never felt so overwhelmed; the feeling of Sukuna sucking on a tit while his dick was buried inside of you—unmoving—was nearly enough to make you cum, despite the lack of movement that Sukuna allowed.
Bringing you out of your dazed state was the sudden ringing of your phone on the table beside the ashtray. Your eyes widened in surprise, as you softly pushed Sukuna off of you. “Just—Just ignore it. It’s not important.”
“Right. But where’s the fun in that, huh?”
“You don’t mean. . .”
“You know what I mean. Answer it, on speaker,” Sukuna pressed. His tone told you he wasn’t going to repeat himself.
With shaky fingers, you reached for the phone, answered the caller, and put it on speaker. “H-Hello? Katayama?”
Katayama was the name of one of your co-stars. Or, in other words, the blonde dude, which Sukuna kept mentioning earlier.
“Hey, you! It’s pretty late right now, perfect time for us to go out and get some drinks, y’know? I’m a bit bored, as of lately.”
You were about to respond with an apologetic declination to his offer, but Sukuna cut you off as he roughly lifted up your hips and abruptly slammed them back down, causing you to choke back a moan, and cover it up with a faux series of coughs. “I’m, ah, a little . . . busy,” you whimpered, wincing at the tight grip on your hips—which was sure to leave a bruise in the morning, “right now.”
“Are you sick?”
“Uhm, no—I mean, yes!” You let out another fake cough just to seal the deal. “Yup, just a little under the weather.”
You bit your lip, trying to suppress a string of moans and curses as Sukuna continued slamming your hips up and down onto his.
“Well, if you’re ever in need of an extra warm blanket, don’t be afraid to—”
“Hahh.” A breathy moan slipped past your lips, and you could practically see the surprised look that was probably on Katayama’s face right now.
“—call . . . me. Uhm, are you sure you’re sick? You sound like you’re in the middle of . . . something. Is everything okay—?”
“Yup! Yeah, everything is totally okay,” you forced out, with an enthusiastic tone. Gripping Sukuna’s shoulder with your free hand for leverage, you shut your eyes tight as you quickly ended the call. “I’m a little occupied at the moment, I’ll call you ba—I’m gonna go. Bye!”
As swiftly as you hung up the call, you threw your phone across the couch, and let out all of the noises you had been previously bottling up.
“I’m so c-close.” You mewled, now even more desperate than you were before.
“If you dare cum,” Sukuna began, his voice low, “I’ll stop.”
“Sukuna!” You whined, scratching at his back and leaving little crescent shaped marks from your nails on his tricep. “I need to—ahnn!”
Squeezing your eyes shut, you held onto Sukuna’s shoulders for dear life as he quickened his pace. Lifting your hips up with ease, and slamming them back down with equal force. Fucked out of your mind was not enough to describe your current state, as your eyes rolled back into your head, and your lipstick was smudged across your mouth.
Sukuna leaned down to whisper into your ear, never stopping his movements. “Bet the little blondie didn’t fuck you like this, huh?”
It was obvious that Sukuna wasn’t an insecure guy; I mean, he had no reason to be. He had nice muscles, a good body, overall, sharp features, tempting eyes, and tattoos for days. But, you had to admit, the spark of jealousy was definitely a good look on Sukuna, one that you wouldn’t mind seeing every once in a while, if it meant seeing him like . . . this.
“. . .S-Sukuna, we never—we never even fucked in the first place.”
“Oh, yeah? How long you been without cock, then, huh? Must be why you’ve been acting like such a bitch. I almost feel bad; all this time, my baby’s just been depraved.”
“. . .F-fuck you,” you shivered, body practically shaking with need.
“No need to state the obvious, sweetheart. Fuck, even your tears taste sweet,” Sukuna groaned, licking a stripe up your cheek. “It’s as if you were literally made for me to devour.”
“Please, please let me cum! I’m so—hnngh—close.”
“Yeah, no. C’mon, I know my girl can last just a little longer, can’t you?” Sukuna grinned, biting his lip as he admired your dazed state. He hadn’t been able to touch you in three months, ninety days, 504 hours. If anyone was going to get their fill, it was him.
—
“Oh!” Your stylist exclaimed, after walking into your dressing room and noticing you lying asleep on the couch. “You’re already here. And, Sukuna’s here, too. Wait. . . SUKUNA’S HERE, TOO!?”
#sukuna x reader#ryomen x reader#sukuna x you#jjk x reader#jjk x you#jjk smut#sukuna smut#sukuna ryomen x reader#sukuna x y/n#em writes ˎˊ˗
699 notes
·
View notes
Text
more leon headcanons
i miss him i miss him i miss him i miss him i miss him i miss him
i miss my wife, tails.
so lets talk about him.
⟢ leon was 6 years old when his family was murdered. there was a time when he could remember all of their faces. yet as he gets older, their faces have become a lot more blurry. sometimes he catches himself staring into the mirror. did nonno have the same nose as he did? was he the same blonde as his nonna? does he have his moms' smile? were his dad's eyes just as blue as his? when they looked at him, did they see themselves in him as he's so desperatley trying to remember them in him?
⟢ leon is the italian version of a "no sabo" kid. he knows the language, yet doesn't seem to be able to put the words together himself. he just kinda stands there nodding his head with a blank stare. then when he has to respond he's just kinda like "uuuhhhh tbh idk". he knows how to correctly pronounce some words and phrases, but that's about it.
⟡HOWEVER, he will call his lover with italian terms of endearment, i.e., amore mio, cucciolotta, cuore mio, piccola, etc. he might even say some phrases that he does know in italian, i.e., Io e te per sempre (you and me forever), sei la mia vita (you are my life), ti amo tanto (i love you so much), etc.
+p.s. sorry for any misinterpretations, i'm not italian but i am mexican so spanish and italian are not too different (???) but please correct me if i'm wrong!
⟢ leon has always been a dinosuar guy. he's watched probably every dino documentary thats ever been made and rewatches them whenever they're on. so, naturally, whenever he travels for work, he'll try his best to visit every museum he possibly can to see their dino exhibit and nothing else. of course, as het gets older (probably DI to RE6) he'll explore the other exhibits but for rn he'll just stick to the dino exhibits. and if you must ask him what his favorite dinosuar is, he'll say the answer he said as a kid, a spinosaurus. it's common enough for people to know and not give him a strange look of confusion. but really, his heart belongs to the pachycephalosaurus.
⟡ of course, in its natural progression, leon will also delve into a fascination of raptors and reptiles. he'll go to zoos and spend his time in the reptile exhibit. he'll also go bird watching for any avian raptors he can find. this also does mean that he has nice pair binoculars and will buy a native bird identify guide when he travels. his documentary options have now expanded with his two new interests which really excites him.
⟢ whether you believe it or not, leon is actually more of a fruity cocktail kinda guy. he doesn't mind beer or hard liquor, especially when he needs something strong and to the point. something to help him drink away the bad memories and all too realistic nightmares. but if he's just in the mood to enjoy himself, leon will cook up a salty dog or a cranberry vodka.
⟢ leon oh so terribly wants kids. but before he forces you into his life, he never thought that to be possible. so in his off time, he would volunteer for the NICU at the local hospital to be a baby cuddler. he got into it after he tried it with rebecca. it gave him the sense that everything will be okay, that even if he can't have a few of his own, at least he can be there for little ones that need someone, even if its for a moment.
⟡ TRUST, that once you do have a baby with this man, he's all over them. that baby will never not be in his arms or in the proximity of him. he's on spit up and diaper duty. baby wakes up late at night crying? no worries, he's already in the room (he was sleeping on the nursery floor). you will almost have to battle this man to hold YOUR baby.
⟢ leon is actually a really big fan of romcoms and time pieces. in fact, his favorite time piece movie is pride and prejudice. oh he absolutely adores romantic pieces like that especially because he's a hopeless romantic at heart. he's fallen in love with the idea of falling in love with a girl he's just met and having soft intimate moments with them. his guilty pleasure romcom is 13 going on 30, especially since after the whole plagas incident, the movie was just released and he binged that movie on repeat.
⟡ BUT, just because he likes time pieces and romcoms doesn't mean he doesn't like action or thriller movies. leon's a really big fan of the matrix series and star wars series. also the fast and furious franchise is actually where his love of fast cars and motorcycles stem from. he just can't do any horror movies because baby has trauma :(
₊˚⊹ ᥫ᭡. 𓂃
it's not much, but i thought these were silly and gave him a little more character. please let me know what you think or if you have any headcanons of your own!!!
xxox
545 notes
·
View notes