#I'm expanding my social circle here

[still-fatemeh]

HIHIHIIIII :333 youre so sweet omg ive been meaning to interact with u for a while sjsjsjusus (but im confused on what name to refer to u by aaa) anywayss tyy for tagging me in stuff i love it <333

O Mah Godddddddd

THANK YOU (ФωФ)

You can refer to me as fatemeh (my name, lol), though my friend here calls me fate. (Which is MUCH MUCH cooler)

So yeah, any you prefer.

And also thank you, I'll tag you in more stuff (annoy you more) And feel free to tag me too. I love it (　・`ω・´)

I also wanted to interact with you more because I thought you were from the same country that I'm from, and I did some research and detective work (going through your posts like a stalker) to figure it out because I'm nosy. (^_^;) And I got some clues, but I'm still curious. Are you from India or anywhere in the Middle East? (It's okay if you don't want to share, I'm just nosy and get excited about people being from the same place as I am.)

[malusokay]

Little things that improved my life 𝜗𝜚˚⋆

Accepting my sleep schedule. I'm a night owl; I focus at night, I'm calm at night, I'm motivated at night. For a long time, I tried to fight this since everyone always preaches getting up early, but since I started accepting my natural sleep schedule, I've been feeling a lot better and have become way more productive.

"drink more water". TEA. Tea is the secret here. I will be honest, I hate drinking water; it doesn't matter if I have a cute water bottle or a cute glass, I still hate it. TEA.

Replying quickly. I used to be one of those people who get a text message and think, "Oh, I'll reply to that later", and then just forget about it entirely. Now, I text back as soon as I see the message. This has not only improved my texting anxiety (which I cause on my own by now replying and then feeling bad) but also deepened my connection to my friends. <3

Keeping my circle small and being okay with that. Over the past months, I've had this sudden urge to expand my social circle and get to know more and more people, especially after I moved in August. However, this quickly ended in what I like to call my "social burnout". I was tired, annoyed, and overwhelmed. It took a few weeks for it to settle, but I've come to the conclusion that I would much rather have a smaller circle of people who I trust and love deeply than a huge group of friends, and that's totally okay.

Wearing what I like. Even though I live in a big city, I'd still say that my style can sometimes be a bit more extravagant than what most people wear, another point is that I'm very uncomfortable with pants so I only wear skirts, which is also considered a bit odd where I live. But over the past years, I've come to accept that and have become so sure of myself and found such comfort in my style that I now just wear whatever I like, and it makes every day a little bit nicer.

Reading and writing for pleasure. Reading books outside of my studies and spending time researching topics that simply interest me is such a great way to calm your mind. Same for writing, I always like to say that to write is to think; putting your thoughts on paper in cohesive and well-crafted sentences that you can then reread and think over again is such a liberating thing to do.

Reaching out more. fuck the whole "double texting" and "no contact" thing. If you want to speak to someone because they mean something to you, then just do it. Unless they specifically asked for space, you shouldn't feel bad about wanting to be in touch with them. Many even really appreciate it when you show that you truly care. Let's stop the nonchalant act, and instead, let's face deep emotions and true vulnerability. <3

As always, please feel free to share your own little insights and things that helped you improve comments! <3

my insta: @ malusokay

love ya ･:*₊‧✩

[jymwahuwu]

Wrote some!! This is the second part of the abo story, you meet your two future Alpha husbands😽😽

part 1

cw: dystopian au, forced breeding policy

You borrow some credit from a friend and save it to a temporary payment card for daily payments. Now your bank account has been frozen by the government - for the hilariously unbelievable reason of not being pregnant beyond the appropriate reproductive age.

You don’t really want to get married, and you’ve criticized and complained about this weird policy on social media in the past. Now you are faced with this situation… There aren’t many options here, and you have to consider marriage and having children. You have no doubt that this government will really force you to be sent to a breeding facility.

News channels have reported that Omega and Beta citizens who repeatedly ignored warnings were sent to breeding facilities and stuck on the wall to wait for thorough breeding and pregnancy. Those citizens who emphasized "reproductive freedom" had their mouths gagged and their hands tied behind their backs. They whimpered and struggled to be stimulated and expanded by dildos, and finally broke and apologized in the water pool.

You-you don’t want to experience…

Before heading out, you circled in front of the mirror and checked your clothes. The two Alphas made an appointment with you to meet and talk in a restaurant. Even though you're dating two people right now, you've only chatted with one of them on the site. He said that the other Alpha believed that marriage and dating had to be discussed in real person. He has a point too. You agreed.

You board a spaceship (no physical currency is required this time, so you breathe a sigh of relief), and check the planned route on the map app to note which station you want to get off the spaceship at. Cheap ships have their downsides. That means the time it takes to travel is doubled, and the number of stations passed is doubled. Tired and shaken along the way, you fell asleep on the spacecraft and finally reached your destination.

After searching for a few minutes, you looked up and were shocked by the decoration of the restaurant. The elegant and luxurious restaurant decoration uses black and purple as the main tone. A foreign song is faintly passed in the air, exuding a quiet and comfortable atmosphere. The Milky Way can be observed in real time outside the window. The sofas and seats for guests are spaced apart and organized. This is very different from the ordinary restaurants you usually go to. Embarrassed, you flipped through the electronic menu in front of the door, wondering if there would be a discount on takeout, and wanted to send a message to them to tell them that they made an appointment at the wrong restaurant. Alas…how are you going to pay for it now…

"Hello, do you have an appointment?" The waiter at the door was filled with a friendly smile. You just feel more pressure. "W-wait, I'll send a message to my friend."

You: I'm here, but wait, is this here? Did I go to the wrong place? 🥹

You: [Restaurant link in the food app]

Aventurine: No, that's right^^ We're already here.

You: okay

As soon as you enter the restaurant, a bouquet of flowers is blocked from view in front of you, the fragrance is overflowing, and the delicate petals are condensed with bright colors and vitality. What's this? You took a step back in fear. A head with blond hair poked out from behind the flowers, with dazzling bright eyes. "Hello, this is a wedding gift." He explained with a smile.

Wedding gift? You were so frightened that your hands trembled, holding a large bouquet of flowers. The flowers are so crowded that they must be leaned on your shoulders.

"Hmm…? Just kidding. This is an engagement gift."

You paused after hearing his explanation. You are not engaged, or even agreed to be engaged to these two Alphas. This must be Aventurine. He was just as flirtatious and cheerful as he sounded on the Internet, sitting down and placing the bouquet in your hand back in its place. Sitting next to him was a man with a frown. "I've had enough of your peacocking. It's so grandiose."

"Ah, of course the more expensive the gift, the better. Everyone's feelings can be reflected in it, right?"

"Hello, I'm Veritas Ratio." He crossed his arms in front of his chest and nodded to you.

[globalrebrand]

i love all ur depictions of vil and i’m so happy u took a liking to lyney who’s also my fav ❤️ ur toxic vil in particular haunts my brain, lives in my floorboards and echoes in the halls of my mind at night….so may i humbly please request “forcing them to divulge past traumas or secrets” with vil? 🥹

Warnings: Dead dove, do not eat. Mentions of past sexual assault, nonconsensual age gap relationship.

Vil had been quiet since you'd left the party.

This wasn't unlike him. At the end of a long night of socializing, he generally preferred to hold your hand or, even better, sit with you tucked against his side in the back of his car while his driver navigated you both to his penthouse.

But tonight, the gap between the middle seat felt like an unbridgeable canyon stretched between the two of you.

It was his father's 50th birthday celebration held at the family home. The Shaftlands elite came out in droves to celebrate the beloved Eric Venue.

The night started well enough. Vil was more than happy to introduce you to his wider circle of famous friends and loved ones. As an up-and-coming model with a promising career (even more so with Vil proudly claiming you as his), your agent wouldn't let you forget how this was a rare opportunity to expand your network, but you weren't here for any of that. Tonight, all you wanted to do was support your boyfriend and his father at this critical milestone.

Vil made the rounds with you, introducing you to well known actors, actresses, veteran supermodels, producers and directors all gathered to celebrate his father.

You and Vil were in fragile territory as a couple. If you were able to successfully demonstrate that you could be one of them, an elite, a star, then you and Vil were looking at a future as one of the foremost power couples in the industry.

Thankfully, things were going splendidly; you spoke at the correct times and came off as appropriately humble and down to earth as an outsider in such an elite group. You took great pride in how Vil beamed as he watched you gracefully interact with these other celebrities, your natural charisma on full display. It was hard to get any higher off the fumes of his affection, then he paused, observing you with a tender look and petting the apple of your cheek with a smooth thumb before quietly admitting, "I'm so happy I have you."

That was until you ran into him.

"There's one more person I want you to meet," Vil said warmly, urging you away from your current conversation to meet a distinguished-looking white-haired gentleman.

"Uncle Valle, this is my girlfriend." Vil beamed but the director had a sickening look on his face, ignoring his nephew and addressing you with far too much familiarity.

"Long time no see." You froze. Valle Mensing is a world-famous director and a man you'd desperately hoped never to see again.

"Uh- I think you're mistaken. It's nice to meet you." You avoided eye contact, suddenly finding your shoes interesting, was you felt Vil bore daggers into the side of your head.

The older man raises an eyebrow in slight disbelief.

"Hmmm, you're right my mistake." Thankfully Valle just patted Vil on the back mentioning, "lovely girl you got there, take good care of her."

Vil grabbed your hand and tugged you close to whisper in your ear.

"What was that?" You wouldn't do this now, couldn't.

"Vil, I feel a little sick. I'm going to step out into the garden. If you'll excuse me," you excused yourself, leaving Vil absolutely baffled and more than definitely ensuring that he was suspicious of your interaction with his beloved uncle.

You had no idea they were so close, and now you were scared. You prayed Vil would just let it alone, as unlikely as it would be, but you didn't want to make him choose. Rather, you didn't want to be rejected by him in favor of his dastardly uncle.

You both left shortly after. Vil's mood was considerably soured, and a paranoid expression became etched into your features.

Now, it has been about 20 minutes of driving, and still, no word has passed between you.

Uncertain of what to anticipate, you needed to at least confirm where Vil would be dropping you off tonight. You had a sinking suspicion that your behavior tonight didn't earn you the privilege to share his bed.

"Are you dropping me off or-" You're quickly interrupted.

"What relationship do you have with my uncle?" Vil turned to look at you, his eyes already brimming with judgment.

The impulse to lie was so strong. You'd done it for so long. You knew Vil would likely see right through it, but you had to try. Try to protect yourself and him from the truth. It was only when you were with Vil that you felt as if you had any worth. If he knew your past, what had actually transpired between you and his uncle, you're certain he would no longer want you.

And then, who would you be?

"I don't have any-" You started, but as you suspect, you were cut off almost immediately.

"Why did he say 'long time no see?'" Vil questioned, leering over you with a raised brow. "Don't play dumb. It's unbecoming." He scolded, a coldness in his eyes but an unmistakable look of morbid curiosity. Vil likely already suspected what you would reveal to him, but he wanted to hear it from your lips and force you to bear the most vulnerable parts of yourself to him.

"Vil I-"

"I saw you speak to him in the garden. What were you speaking about."

"It was a long time ago." Your face was hot, and your voice pinched and weary. Tears threatening to spill at any moment.

Vil sighed, exasperated and desperate for the truth. It was obvious he was done waiting for you to confess in earnest.

"Did you fuck him?" The words struck you like a blade to the chest.

"Please, I-" You wanted to retreat and hide, but there was no cover from Vil's relentless barrage of questions and accusations in the backseat.

"Did you or did you not. If you don't tell me now, we're finished."

A long silence passed between you as you tried to form the words in your mouth.

"Yes." The words come out cracked and dry. A horrible truth you didn't want to deny. The tears had started falling now, hysterical sobs wracking your entire body. You prayed the driver had the decency not to spare you a glance.

"Did he force you?" Vil questioned. Less angry, but not even remotely comforting.

"It doesn't matter, please. I just want to live in the now with you!"

"He did, didn't he. He raped you?" You tried to verbalize to say yes, he did...many times, but all you could do was nod wordlessly.

"I need you to tell me exactly what happened tonight."

"H-he asked me why I didn't tell you about our relationship. And I said because it's not something I'm proud of." Calming yourself with stuttering breaths, you admit, "Vil, I'm not lying when I say it is my greatest shame."

"Why don't people know about this?" He's angry. Hurt.

"Because...I wasn't exactly of age at the time." Vil startles, like you've smacked him.

Quietly, as asked, "How old were you?"

"15."

He curses in his native tongue, looking angry and disgusted.

"My agency lied about my age to get me into the country." You went on to explain.

I didn't want to, but they said the connection would benefit my career, and I didn't know any better.

"I've never told anyone."

At that Vil perked up. A pitying look on his face as he embraced you for the first time since you left the party.

"You should not have been subjected to anything so horrible."

We'll go to my home. I wouldn't want you to be alone after having to face that awful man.

"You won't say anything, right?" You plead. Vil tsks.

My love, he can't be allowed to go free.

Think about all of the other women- No. Girls. He's hurt because of your silence.

You were very courageous in telling me, but I cannot allow you to be silent about this any longer."

Don't worry, darling. No one who hurts will ever be allowed to go unpunished.

You nodded and clung tighter to your boyfriend, grateful that, at least, he didn't seem like he would leave you, but somehow, you weren't comforted by his assertion.

[afewproblems]

Season Two Halloween AU Part Five

Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four

Synopsis: What if Eddie had been at Tina's Halloween Party in Season Two? Featuring Steve!Whump, Stancy Breakup, and Eddie just trying to keep up with all these new revelations about who King-Steve actually is...

Huge huge HUGE shout-out to Jess @strangersteddierthings for being my sounding board and letting me send such long messages full of spoilers!! I can't thank you enough!

***

“Dustin, what the hell are you doing here?” Steve says as he hurries towards the kid, he looks around as though expecting another person to follow behind him. 

“I can’t find Nancy or Jonathan, you’re the only other one who knows about--”

The kid, Dustin, tilts himself to look past Steve at Eddie with suspicious eyes, “you know”.

Steve freezes, his shoulders a rigid line of tension as Dustin steps around him to head for the screen door.

Eddie had to give it to the kid, he certainly had guts just waltzing in here like this. 

“You still have your bat?” 

Steve looks from Dustin to Eddie and lowers his voice to mutter something that has Dustin shaking his head rapidly.

"The one with nails, Steve".

"Your what?" Eddie blurts out, forcing the other two to turn towards him. Dustin full on glares. His eyes narrow in irritation while Steve's face pales before smoothing out in that same guarded expression from earlier.

Dustin steps closer to Eddie and crosses his arms over his chest, "who are you?"

"Dustin--"

"That was a rule," Dustin cuts across Steve, smacking the back of one hand into the palm of the other, "no one else gets to know, and I can't tell Max, so you can't just tell him--"

Steve jerks his head as if slapped, a flush building on his cheeks and ears, "I haven't--Eddie's not, I don't--"

Dustin waves his hand dismissively and turns towards Eddie once again. 

"Look, it's cool that Steve is expanding his social circle but you should leave".

The attitude on this kid.

Eddie holds out a hand at Dustin and laughs but it tumbles out with a tinge of hysteria, "I'm sorry, I'm still stuck on the whole Nail Bat thing?" 

Steve groans, his head swings back and forth from Eddie to Dustin as though he's not sure who to answer first.

He sighs and runs one hand over his face, roughly from the slight wince he makes as he brushes the black eye, "look," Steve barks out, "he's a friend".

Something in Eddie's chest warms at the words despite the incredulous scoff that threatens to tumble out. Steve Harrington, friends with Eddie Munson? 

Dustin snorts, "you don't have friends? I only ever see you with Nancy and Jonathan".

Steve flinches slightly at the words, but Dustin carries on talking, brushing past Steve to the house.

"We don't have time for this, I've been looking for you guys all day and now it's dark and there are lives at stake--"

"Je-sus, okay, okay," Steve takes three long strides to catch up to Dustin and steps in front of him, he reaches out for the kids shoulder but seems to think better of it and instead runs the hand through his hair.

"You said lives are at stake?" 

It's like a switch is flipped in the kid, he whirls around on Steve, a stream of near gibberish falling out of his mouth at a mile a minute, Eddie can hardly follow it.

"And now he's this big," Dustin hisses, throwing his hands nearly two feet apart from one another.

Steve holds up his hands, "okay, Christ, how do you know it's not just a lizard, Dustin?" 

"Because its face opened up and ate my cat, Steve".

Steve looks up at Eddie, meeting his gaze with a nervous laugh, "listen, Dustin, uh, he watches too many B-Monster movies, I'm just gonna take him back to his house".

Now Eddie wouldn't say he's necessarily a, 'go-with-the-flow' kind of guy, but he can roll with the punches --any Dungeon Master worth their salt needed to be able to think on their feet when the time came. 

Which is probably why he opens his big fucking mouth. 

"I mean, life and death situations with cat-eating Kobolds sounds exactly like my kind of night fellas". 

Steve frowns and tilts his head, staring at Eddie while Dustin perks up, his eyes widen in surprise.

"Kobolds? You play D&D?" Dustin says skeptically, pushing past Steve to make his way up to Eddie now.

Eddie laughs at the question, "kid, I run the D&D club at Hawkins High". 

Suddenly it's like there's a different kid standing in front of him, his face lights up in wonder and he opens his mouth to continue when Steve makes a sputtering noise behind him.

"Henderson," Steve bites out, hands on his hips, "I swear to God, if you interrupted us for some Halloween prank, you're dead".

He stands there for a moment scowling at the pair of them before turning on his heel and walking towards the house.

"It's not a prank," Dustin huffs defensively, his arms cross over his chest and his face scrunches into a frown. 

He looks up at Eddie briefly, all good will from the D&D revelation earlier now forgotten as Dustin follows Steve's path towards the door.

Eddie sighs, he could just leave at this point. Either this is the most elaborate way someone has ended a smoke session with him, or the weirdest role playing game Eddie has ever found himself in the middle of. 

But something about the fear in Dustin's voice has Eddie lingering beside the abandoned loungers. He bends down to pick up the forgotten joints and puts them back in his lunchbox before putting the lunchbox back in the backpack. No sense in letting some perfectly good jays go to waste. 

The screen door slides open again revealing Steve, who blinks in surprise, "you stayed?" 

Eddie shrugs, "I said I would, didn't I?" 

Steve nods, and ducks his face, but he can't quite hide the smile that blooms, his eyes crinkle at the corners for the briefest moment before it falls.

"Listen, I know that it sounds like a load of shit--"

"Understatement," Eddie cuts in with a shake of his head.

"Yeah, but you need to know, if you come with us, you're in it. I'm not joking, this is your chance to just walk away". 

It's almost as if Steve is pleading with him, and it's then that Eddie notices what Steve has gripped between his hands. 

A fucking baseball ball bat, studded with nails that have been haphazardly hammered into the end of it.

Eddie looks from the bat, to Steve's face as Dustin steps out of the house now with two walkie talkies in his hand. He reaches for Steve's backpack and unzips it to place them inside before zipping it up again. There's a grim determination on both of their faces that Eddie has never seen on another person in real life and suddenly he's speaking without thinking again.

"Well, what are we waiting for?"

***

Eddie swipes a shaking hand through his sweat matted hair as he watches Steve and the rest of the party move about the Byers living room. 

As though mere hours ago they didn’t just fend off a group of flower faced creatures hellbent on entering their fortified school bus to tear them apart.

It was crazy. 

It was absolutely batshit that all this time there were creatures from another dimension running around their sleepy little backwoods town. 

Eddie shudders at the memory of the sounds they made, the horrible grating wails like metal on metal, echoes in his mind. 

And now…a person was dead. Mr. Newby.

Eddie had met him once while buying a used amp at the Radio Shack just a few months ago. He was nice, asked about the band and what instrument Eddie played. He had even offered to help Eddie get the amp out to his van.

And now, he was dead. 

Mr. Newby would never take Joyce out for another date, he would never walk into his job and help take inventory, he would never offer a helping hand or piece of advice ever again.

Eddie can't help but think about how close they had all come to ending up like Bob, how one of these things had almost crawled into the bus.

What if they hadn't been called away? Bob had a gun and that hadn't been enough to stop the pack of creatures from…

Eddie looks to Steve.

Steve who hasn't stopped pacing the Byers living room since Hopper herded all of them into the house. 

He takes five steps to the window at the front of the room, and five steps back to the door of the kitchen, again and again.

And suddenly, things make so much more sense. 

The strange haunted expression on Steve's face Eddie would see between classes whenever he thought no one was looking.

The way the three of them, Jonathan, Nancy, and Steve never let the kids go anywhere without a ride. 

The way Steve had looked at his empty pool yesterday.

Things happen in the dark, in the woods.

On the fifth pass, Eddie reaches out to Steve and catches the hand closest to him. 

Whatever trance Steve was in dissipates, leaving him to blink once and look down at Eddie's hand before slowly curling his fingers more firmly around Eddie's and squeezing gently. 

"How're you holding up?" Steve asks quietly as he drops Eddie's hand to pull a dining chair up to where Eddie is seated on a beaten up recliner. 

Eddie scoffs at the question and shrugs, "when I figure that out, you'll be the first to know".

Steve nods, a small half smile climbs up his face. 

It drops as he looks across the room at Will.

Jonathan kneels beside the couch, talking quietly to his brother, who stares blankly at the ceiling while Nancy watches on beside them. 

Eddie's eyes follow Nancy's hands, the way she hesitates to touch Jonathan before eventually giving in and draping her hands over his shoulders. 

He looks back at Steve who also seems to be watching Nancy. He breathes out a long sigh and shakes his head, before turning back to Eddie.

"If it makes you feel better, you're taking it better than I did the first time".

Eddie raises one skeptical eyebrow and smirks, "I highly doubt that--"

"I ran away," Steve cuts across him with wide eyes, "I almost left Nance and Jon with a monster, one of those things that took Will," he holds Eddie's gaze for another beat before dropping it to the floor.

"So, don't sell yourself short". 

Eddie opens his mouth to tell Steve he should take his own advice but Hopper suddenly makes his presence known once more as he closes the door to Joyce's room behind him and walks back into the living room. 

"Okay, we may not have backup on route for a few more hours--"

"If they're even coming," Mike scoffs from the corner, "who says they believed you anyway?"

"Listen, until we are told otherwise, we need to sit tight," Hopper barks, sending a glare Mike's way. 

Hopper deflates slightly, as though realizing who he's talking to, and takes a deep steddying breath which he releases slowly through his nose, “we can't just charge in without backup--"

"If we sit here on our asses those things will eventually make it to town, you saw the tunnels Hop," Dustin bites out this time, shooting his own fierce glare at the chief as he stands beside Mike.

"They'll tear everything apart," Max says softly from the floor. She's settled against the back wall of the living room against the collage of drawings that Will had completed in his frenzied state, Lucas sits closer and takes her hand in his own.

"Oh no," Steve mutters under his breath, he spares Eddie a glance before standing up from the chair, "no, no, we can't fight these things by ourselves, we're outmatched here Henderson". 

"Not if we know how they work," Mike insists. He walks towards where Max and Lucas are sitting, nearly stepping on the pair of them in his haste.

"Jesus Mike," Lucas hisses under his breath while Max settles for stomping her foot against Mike's own. He jumps at the sudden pain and the three of them dissolve into vicious bickering and name calling until Steve and Nancy pull the kids away from each other. 

"Okay, just, keep going Mike," Nancy tells him, once everyone has settled down once more. She gestures to the drawings taped up around the room. 

"As I was trying to say," Mike sneers at Max who scoffs and crosses her arms, "what if it's all connected, the tunnels, the dogs, Will?" 

No one speaks, the words seem to hang in the air as all eyes move to the couch where Will lays  wrapped in blankets and staring unseeing at the ceiling.

Mike continues, "this all started after that day in the field--" 

"And if he was infected," Dustin interrupts with a gasp as Mike nods rapidly, pointing at him and then the drawings again.

"It's like a virus, connecting him to this, this--"

"Hivemind," Lucas supplies, his voice hollow as he stands up to join the rest of the kids, "like what Mr. Clarke told us".

"Okay, okay, slow down God Dammit," Hopper huffs as he lifts his hand to pinch his fingers into his eyes.

"Hivemind?" Steve says slowly, as though rolling the word around on his tongue, "like bees?" 

Dustin blinks once, his face morphing in surprise, "kind of, it's like a superorganism made up of several others all working together, one collective consciousness". 

"A Mindflayer," Eddie whispers, just loud enough for the kids to turn their heads towards him.

He's been quiet for so long, sitting on the sidelines of this group that had clearly worked together in a crisis before. It was almost like listening to Jeff, Gareth, and Grant in a Hellfire session, watching them work out a trap in real time before executing their plan. 

It would be endearing if there weren't actual monsters running about.

"Holy shit," Mike breathes out while Dustin darts off towards the bookshelf in the corner.

He flips up some of the drawings until he finds what he's looking for and loudly crows, "yes!"

Dustin marches back to the kitchen table and slams the book down on the surface before flipping several pages. He slaps the back of his hand on the page in triumph as he sends Eddie a confident grin. 

"This isn't a game kid," Hopper sighs but steps closer to look at the book nonetheless.

"But it's the closest metaphor we have," Dustin argues back.

"Analogy," Lucas says as he steps towards the table, a shit eating grin pulls at his mouth as he catches Dustin's eye.

"Fine, analogy, whatever!" Dustin mutters, a red flush climbs up his neck until it settles on his ears, he slaps his hand on the books again, "can I get on with it or do you have more vocab for me?"

"Dustin," Nancy sighs, reaching out for his shoulder with one hand, she gives it a slight shake, "what would this even tell us?" 

"Well," Dustin turns to Nancy now and points at a section below a horrifying drawing of a humanoid man with a squid for a head. Four tentacles point in all directions while its hands wield a terrifying glowing orb. 

It's not something that Eddie has thrown at his players in years now that he's managed to figure out how to balance his encounters properly. 

Because Mindflayers…were horrific.

"They're basically from another dimension, and they travel to different worlds to conquer other species that they see as inferior to themselves". 

"Conquer," Steve breathes out beside Eddie who can't help but shuffle closer to brush his shoulder against Steve's own.

Steve gives Eddie a brief smile before looking back to where Dustin and Hopper are arguing once again. 

Eddie lets his gaze drift only to find Nancy staring at him curiously, her sharp blue eyes flit from Steve and back to himself, the weight of her gaze makes Eddie want to pull away from Steve but he holds his ground and stares right back. 

Nancy offers him a tentative smile, which does nothing to ease the sudden tension in Eddie's chest, feeling as though he's been caught. 

He could easily explain this away, despite the rumors running rampant at school about Eddie, there is no way anyone would believe the same would be true of Steve Harrington.

Eddie ignores the unhappy weight that settles in his stomach at the thought, he let himself get way too close, way too quickly. 

Besides, there wasn’t a chance in hell that Steve was, that he could be…

Eddie shakes himself and moves away, lamenting the loss of Steve’s warm shoulder as he lets Hopper's voice pull him back to the matter at hand.

"Okay then," Hopper nods, looking around the room. 

"How do we kill it?" 

***

They have a plan.

Or at least, half of them do.

Going based off a thirteen year olds hypothesis that their friend is basically a spy for a creature from another dimension -which in hindsight is definitely not the craziest thing they’ve experienced today.

Is it something that Eddie would have never come up with in his wildest dreams? Undoubtedly.

But that was before a girl with literal mind-powers showed up and tossed a dead demodog through the Byers window.

Jesus Christ. 

So, with El and Hopper on their way to the lab, the rest of the party busies themselves by packing the Byers Station Wagon for the drive to Hopper's cabin.

They have to flush this thing possessing Will out of him before it's too late and the cabin is far enough out of town that whatever happens hopefully won’t affect anyone else.

Eddie tries not to think too deeply about what that might mean.

He manages to find another portable heater in the Byers basement and hauls it into his arms before turning around to walk back up the stairs.

When Eddie reaches the landing his heart stops for just a moment when he realizes he can't see the kids. He takes another step into the kitchen and breathes out a sigh of relief when he sees the four of them huddled around the kitchen table with the still open Monster Manual. 

Eddie pauses for just a moment when he spots a Hawkins County map beside the book. 

It's covered in red marker.

An intricate design of lines ending with two circles…both around areas outside of the city center. 

Eddie shakes his head and keeps moving, much to the visible relief of the kids as he makes his way to the back door. 

One problem at a time.

He knows that Steve is around here somewhere, he was helping Jonathan carry Will to the car while Joyce and Nancy gathered as much rope from the shed as they could carry.

God, it's so dark now. 

Eddie understands what Steve meant before, the way the trees rustle in the wind and the moonlight catches on animal eyes that shine in the dark. It's enough to put him on edge as he makes his way around the Byers property. 

Every snap of a branch was a demodog prowling in the brush, every distant howl was a monster coming to drag him into the Underdark.

He shivers and keeps moving, fighting the urge to look over his shoulder every few steps.

Eddie finally makes his way to the shed, peering inside only to startle as Nancy's voice floats through the cool November air. 

"Thank you, for staying with the kids," she says quietly.

Eddie freezes where he stands with the heater in hand. He knows he shouldn't be here for whatever this is, listening in on yet another private conversation between Nancy and Steve but his feet remain planted in the earth. 

"Yeah well, I might be a shitty boyfriend, but it turns out I'm a pretty damn good babysitter," Steve hums so casually that Eddie wonders if it's really him speaking. They’re on the other side of the Byers shed, Eddie can almost make out their shapes between the uneven slates of the wood.

"Steve--"

"It's okay, really," Steve takes a deep breath, "you should go with Jonathan". 

"Steve," Nancy's voice is wet this time as she speaks but Steve hushes her with a sigh.

"It's okay Nance,” he pauses for a beat, “all I want is for you to be happy, and I don’t think you’ve been happy for a long time”.

“What about you,” Nancy whispers, so softly that Eddie almost misses it this time.

Eddie hears the sounds of footsteps and the rustle of fabric, a muffled sniffle and several whispered words that he can't make out from this distance. 

The whispering goes on for another minute or two before they fall silent, only the sound of cicadas and frogs echo in the midnight air around them.

Eddie takes this as his cue to begin to loudly walk over, purposefully grinding his steps into the gravel and walking more heavily than he normally would.

He comes around the corner of the shed to find Steve holding Nancy, his head on top of her own as she presses her face into his chest. 

Eddie clears his throat and watches as Nancy steps away from Steve. He lets her go, both of their movements lighter than they have been in days.

"If you guys checked the shed, Joyce said it's now or never".

Nancy nods and walks over to take the heater from Eddie, giving him a warm smile as her gentle hands brush his own, and huh --he kinda gets it now. How Steve could have fallen head over heels for this secret badass girl, Nancy Wheeler. 

"Thank you," Nancy smiles and Eddie sputters, running his now free hands through his hair.

"For what, I didn't--"

She raises a single eyebrow, and looks from Steve, before bringing her gaze back to Eddie.

"For being there, for all of them". 

With that, Nancy walks back towards the house leaving Eddie to feel as though he missed a lot more of that conversation than he should have. 

***

They finish refortifying the Byers house, boarding up the broken window that El had tossed the dead demodog through. Eddie adds one last nail and hammers it in before stepping back to admire their handiwork.

Steve lowers his hand from where he held the board in place and shoots Eddie a grin before he collects the box of nails from the floor and turns to put it on the coffee table.

"Steve?" Eddie says quietly. He doesn’t need to really, the kids aren't paying attention to the pair of them, but this is just for Steve. Eddie doesn't need four pairs of eyes staring at him as he tries to say this.

"I just, I'm sorry about Nancy".

Steve tilts his head in confusion, but Eddie keeps going.

"If we do make it out of this, I don't want you to think you were a 'shitty' anything". 

Eddie winces as Steve's eyes narrow slightly.

"I'm guessing you were standing by the shed a lot longer than we thought," Steve says slowly as he looks back at the kids and takes another step even closer. 

Eddie winces at being caught and nods, “I was looking for you originally to see if you guys needed any more help, and then I heard voices and just,” he shrugs, “I wasn’t sure if you’d be okay or not, after that”.

“And for what is worth, you definitely have changed,” Eddie offers with a sly grin, “I don’t think anyone would have expected Steve-the Hair-Harrington to use Faberge, let alone let us plebs in on his secret”.

Steve’s mouth opens and closes before breaking into a wide grin, a startled laugh falling from his mouth, growing in volume until Eddie can’t help but join him.

Steve raises his hands to run over his face and into his hair as he looks at Eddie, the grin on his face softens slightly the longer he looks.

Suddenly, his eyes harden and the look of determination from yesterday takes over. Steve squares his shoulders and breathes out a strangely broken sigh before he reaches out for Eddie's hands. He takes the hammer from him and sets it down on the coffee table beside them.

"My Nonna told me once," Steve whispers, using his hand to point into the middle distance, "Steven, people will come in and out of your life all the time, and the ones that are meant to be there will stay, and if they go, then it wasn't meant to be". 

Steve breathes out a sudden nervous laugh, "she was so straightforward and I loved that about her".

Eddie doesn’t dare to breathe as Steve shakes his head.

"And you, you stayed," Steve continues softly, "and I just…" 

Eddie's own breathing picks up as Steve leans closer, enough that Eddie can count the freckles on the bridge of his nose.

"Fuck what Dustin said, I think I need more people in my life like that". 

Eddie's eyes widen slightly as the words begin to register. No, no way, this can’t be happening.

He lets out a strangled laugh and leans away from Steve’s space, “more friends in your life right?”

It all happens so quickly after that.

Steve freezes where he stands. His face moves through several expressions, some so brief that Eddie can’t quite tell what is going on before it smoothes out once again into something blank; Steve lifts his hand to pinch the bridge of his nose before dropping it to his side and nodding.

“Yes, right, friends, duh,” Steve laughs but it's not at all like the bright wild one he let out just a few seconds ago.

This one was dull, hollow.

Eddie opens his mouth to say something, anything to wipe away the horrible emptiness in Steve's eyes but Dustin suddenly pushes past Eddie to grab the sleeve of Steve’s jacket.

"Steve!" Dustin says frantically, "Steve, we have a problem!" 

The sound of a car door slamming outside catches their attention and a sinking feeling begins to form in the pit of Eddie's stomach. There's no way Hopper and El would be back from the lab yet, and Jonathan said they would radio if there were any changes. 

So who the hell was outside?

Part Six

Tag List:

@eriquin @luvinthefreaks @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @goodolefashionedloverboi @ellietheasexylibrarian @bambibiest @sadboislovebeans @howincrediblysapphicofyou @coleys-a-nerd @whycantiuseunderscore @airconditioning123 @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @corrodedbisexual @starman-jpg @ilovecupcakesandtea @yoriposts @clumsiluni @pelinelin @phantomcat94 @lololol-1234 @anaibis @airconditioning123 @steveshairspray @hellfireone @sunswathe @eddielives1986 @tentativeghost @robin-not-batman @estrellami-1 @manda-panda-monium @tinyplanet95 @perseus-notjackson @queenie-ofthe-void @rainbowsaw @sp0o0kylights @littlebluejane @hi-im-eff @phantypurple @just-ladyme @thoroughlycollected @justrandomfandomstm @swimmingbirdrunningrock @finntheehumaneater @dynamic-powerm@nightmareglitter

and for some peeps that I think may be interested! @steddierthings @steddie-there @steves-strapcollection @henderdads @stevesbipanic @spooky-brakers

[astroamorsworld]

What does this Jupiter in Gemini transit mean for your rising sign?

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Enjoy!

Aries Rising: Jupiter's shift into Gemini brings positive energy to your communication zone (3rd house). This is your chance to broaden your horizons through learning, conversations, and short trips. You might take a class, learn a new language, or travel somewhere that ignites your curiosity. This transit can also enhance your relationships with siblings, neighbors, and classmates. You'll find it easier to connect with others and express yourself clearly. Be mindful of a tendency to overthink or gossip, but overall, this is a time to expand your network and explore new ideas with an optimistic outlook.

Taurus Rising: This transit activates your second house of income and possessions. You might find new ways to make money, perhaps through a side hustle that taps into your talents. Embrace your natural Venusian charm and explore opportunities that combine your love of beauty and practicality. It's also a time to reassess your spending habits and cultivate a more abundant mindset. Remember, feeling secure financially allows you to relax and enjoy the finer things in life.

Gemini Rising: The planet of luck and expansion, has moved into your first house of self. This is basically your personal New Year! This transit brings a surge of optimism, confidence, and a thirst for knowledge. You'll find yourself naturally drawn to new experiences and people that broaden your horizons. Embrace your inherent curiosity and explore anything that sparks your interest. This is a powerful time to step into your most authentic self and share your unique voice with the world.

Cancer Rising: Jupiter is activating your 12th house of subconscious, dreams, and hidden desires. This can feel introspective and even a little mysterious. Embrace this inward journey – it's an opportunity to heal past hurts, release limiting beliefs, and connect with your intuition. Practices like meditation, journaling, or therapy can be helpful in navigating this introspective phase. While social interaction might take a backseat, this time spent within fosters personal growth and paves the way for future abundance.

Leo Rising: Jupiter's transit through Gemini activates your 11th house of friendships, groups, and long-term goals. This is a fantastic time to expand your social circle and connect with like-minded individuals who inspire and support you. You might find yourself drawn to collaborative projects or causes you're passionate about. This transit is all about building a strong support system that fuels your ambitions. Don't be afraid to put yourself out there and network! Your natural charisma and leadership qualities will be magnetic, attracting people who share your vision. This is a powerful time to plant seeds for the future, surrounded by those who believe in you and your dreams.

Virgo Rising: Your focus shifts towards career and public image (10th house). This transit brings a lucky boost to your professional life! You might find exciting new opportunities arise, or receive recognition for your hard work and expertise. Embrace your natural Virgo-like diligence and strive for excellence – your efforts are likely to be rewarded. This is also a good time to expand your professional network and connect with mentors or influencers in your field. Jupiter's optimistic energy can fuel your ambition and help you achieve your goals. Remember, Virgos, don't be afraid to step outside your comfort zone and take on new challenges. This transit encourages growth and advancement, so shine your light and let your talents be seen!

Libra Rising: Jupiter in Gemini activates your 9th house of travel, philosophy, and higher learning. This transit ignites your curiosity and desire to broaden your horizons. You might embark on a long-awaited trip, delve into a new culture, or pursue higher education. Embrace your natural Libra charm and openness to different perspectives. This is a powerful time for personal growth through exploration and learning. Jupiter's optimistic energy encourages you to seek out knowledge and experiences that challenge your beliefs and expand your worldview. So, embrace the journey, Libra risings, and get ready to discover a whole new side of yourself!

Scorpio Rising: Prepare for a transformative journey in your realm of intimacy and shared resources (8th house). This transit can bring a deeper understanding of your closest bonds, both financially and emotionally. Jupiter's expansive energy encourages open communication and vulnerability within partnerships. It's a good time to explore taboos or hidden aspects of your relationships, leading to a more profound connection. You might also find opportunities to manage finances jointly or explore investments with a trusted partner. Remember, Scorpio risings, true intimacy thrives on trust and open communication. Embrace this transit to strengthen your bonds and unlock hidden potential within your closest connections.

Sagittarius Rising: With Jupiter, your ruling planet, moving into Gemini, it activates your 7th house of partnerships and commitments. This transit is all about expanding and enriching your connections with others. On a personal level, you might find yourself drawn to new partnerships, both romantic and platonic. Jupiter's optimistic energy fosters a spirit of cooperation and compromise, making it easier to find common ground with others. Existing relationships can also deepen and strengthen during this transit. This is a fantastic time to explore collaborations, negotiations, and strengthen your bonds with significant others. Remember, Sagittarius rising, your inherent optimism and openness are magnetic. Embrace this transit to connect with like-minded individuals who challenge and inspire you. This is a powerful time to build strong, supportive relationships that enrich your life on all levels.

Capricorn Rising: This transit brings a lucky boost to your health, habits, and work environment. Jupiter's expansive energy encourages you to find ways to make your daily routines more efficient and enjoyable. You might discover new healthy habits or explore alternative wellness practices that improve your physical and mental well-being. This is also a fantastic time to learn new skills or refine existing ones, boosting your productivity and satisfaction at work. Remember, Capricorn rising, taking care of yourself is the foundation for success in all areas of life. Embrace this transit to optimise your routines and create a work-life balance that fosters both achievement and enjoyment.

Aquarius Rising: With Jupiter gracing your 5th house of joy, romance, and self-expression, prepare for a playful and pleasure-filled year. This transit is all about embracing your authentic self and exploring activities that bring you genuine happiness. Whether it's reigniting old hobbies, pursuing artistic endeavors, or simply having more fun, Jupiter encourages you to express yourself freely. Romantically, you might attract new love interests or deepen existing connections through shared enjoyment and lightheartedness. Remember, Aquarius risings, life shouldn't be all work and no play. Embrace this transit to tap into your creativity, reconnect with your inner child, and experience life with a joyful spirit.

Pisces Rising: With Jupiter lighting up your 4th house of domesticity, family, and emotional foundations, this transit brings a wave of optimism and expansion to your personal life. This is a fantastic time to focus on creating a warm and inviting home environment. You might redecorate, make renovations, or simply spend more quality time with loved ones. Jupiter's expansive energy encourages strengthening family bonds and deepening connections with those who provide you with a sense of security. It's also a good time to explore your ancestry or reconnect with past family traditions. Remember, Pisces rising, a strong foundation at home fosters a sense of peace and well-being in all areas of life. Embrace this transit to nurture your inner sanctuary and cultivate a loving and supportive home environment.

Check my pinned post for more!💖

[lolaandthens0me]

I've been 2 years single after a long relationship with someone who only kink-shamed me for loving ABDL. I was stuck because I wanted to "save the relationship," and ultimately, it ended. Now, I'm almost 40 and haven't been able to connect with anyone. What's your advice, as someone with healthy relationships, to someone who has often felt like he'll stay alone forever?

Hello Anon!

I am so sorry to hear that you were shamed in your last relationship. Kink shaming is awful. You are loved and accepted here, and I thank you for reaching out. Unfortunately, I think most people fear and ridicule what they don't understand and that can leave loved ones feeling alone, ashamed, and unable to feel trust and vulnerability with their partner. That is a really hard place to be in, and it is my hope that you are finding ways to heal and move forward.

As someone who left a longterm relationship in my late-30s, mostly for reasons relating to not feeling able to fully be myself within that relationship, I empathize with you as you enter into this kink world wanting to find a partner and also feeling very old in that process. Here are some things that helped me grow and lead me to the healthy (and kinky!) relationships I have now.

Doing therapy to help better understand myself, my wants and needs, and find a place of self-love and acceptance

Becoming an active communicator vs. a passive one

Putting myself out there with the intent of forming connections and friendships, not focusing on finding "the one"; seeking out those online and in-person that were open-minded, empathetic, and living life in an authentic way

Understanding and asking for the types of relationships I was looking for

Being open to whatever and whoever the Universe brought my way

Spreading kindness and acceptance

Learning to speak with honesty even when it seemed too hurtful, hard, or confrontational

Picking up new hobbies and interests that forced me into meeting new people and expanding my social circle

Finding the courage and excitement to go to my first CAPCon and put myself out there the whole time with openness and exuberance

Learned to listen to my heart

I hope something in this list speaks to you and is helpful. I know a lot of these things are way easier said than done, but working on these things was truly transformational for me. A good place to start is to write down a couple of lists: "Things I Need" and "Things I Want". I did this as I began my growth journey and would periodically go back to my lists to keep myself accountable, inspired, and on the right track.

Never hesitate to reach out and look for support. And - I am rooting for you.

[funemployed-fangirl]

Modern Bridgerton AU

Colin & Penelope

Colin has no interest in getting anywhere near the family business. He takes an extended gap year after high school (he goes to “find himself” on a farming collective in New Zealand…after parting his way through Europe for 6 months). Eventually he does make it to college, after which he fucks back off to wander around the world.

Penelope has always enjoyed writing, but more importantly loves observing people from the side lines. She’s the quiet one in a loud, kind of obnoxious family, so pretending to be invisible comes easily for her. She goes to NYU and gets a degree in Journalism. While there, she starts the Whistledown blog making observations about the New York elite (it started as a class project…then she kept going). It's mostly benign. Sometimes it’s the social stuff (who was at which party wearing what), and sometimes it's in-depth analysis of how someone’s business is doing (data and all). Whistledown basically becomes required reading for New York upper social circles. 

Fun side note: While Colin and Penelope have always known each other (Penelope is best friends with Colin’s younger sister Eloise), they’d never spent any time together (who hangs out with their little sister’s friends?). That is, until they get to college. Because of Colin’s gap years, they end up overlapping at NYU for a couple years, during which time they get pretty close…like, REALLY close. But then Colin graduates and heads off for his adventures and Penelope stays in New York with her ever growing Whistledown blog.

They reconnect when Colin comes back to the city. There’s a drunken hook up in the back of a cab (following a party of some sort), after which they spend the next day together. Since it’s a Sunday, Violet is hosting Sunday Family Dinner, so Colin just texts "I'm bringing Penelope." Everyone's like, cool, great, we love Penelope. They show up holding hands and keep sitting down next to each other with his arm around her waist, holding hands, leaning into each other - full couple mode, no shame. It still takes everyone legitimately half the night for someone to go... is something happening here? 

Patented Bridgerton style everyone-at-once conversation explodes at the table: 

Benedict: Surely Penelope can do much better than Colin. 

Eloise: No way something is happening here. Oh my god are you two dating? No way, you would have told me. Oh my god, are you two actually dating?

Kate: Eloise, are you going to be okay? 

Daphne: They did look awfully cozy at Cressida's birthday party last night. 

Sophie: Did you two hook up after Cressida’s birthday party?! 

Anthony: Did you think none of us would notice that you were suddenly a couple?

Gregory: We’ve all been here for 3 hours and none of us did notice. 

Hyacinth: Except for me, obviously. 

Francesca: Then why didn't you say anything?

Hyacinth: I’VE BEEN SAYING SOMETHING FOR YEARS!

Colin gives them a few minutes to wear themselves out before announcing that yes, they are together. And things escalate quickly after that, with them getting engaged after a couple months. At their engagement party, a drunken Colin makes an impromptu speech where he announces that he’s “just SO PROUD of his fiancé, Penelope! Do you guys know how awesome she is? She runs that gossip blog that everyone’s obsessed with ALL BY HERSELF! How cool is that!” Yeah…no one knew it was Penelope’s blog.

The consequences of her being outed as the author of the blog aren’t dire (it’s not like she’s ever been intentionally malicious or tried to ruin someone). In fact, she starts getting access to hot ticket restaurants and parties, and the society girlies are suddenly nicer to her as they start trying to score spots on the site for their side hustle brands. She gets a buy-out offer (Buzzfeed, Cracked, Wired, whatever) and the site expands. A lot. She continues to run it, and Colin writes travel articles every once-in-a-while (he’s basically a kept man and living his best life in their Upper East Side penthouse).

more (x)

[boinin]

Conspiracy theory of the week

Although Isagi uses this example to explain what "self style" egoists think is most important, the attitudes displayed here are Isagi's own.

In short, Isagi is interested in and motivated to seek:

Love

Money

Art as a hobby

Video games as a hobby

He's not really bothered about:

Education

Fashion

Making friends or expanding his social circle (lmfao tell that to everyone in bllk, they can't get enough of him)

Finally, he dislikes and avoids baseball.

This is intended as a shitpost, but...

Me being me, I decided to find receipts 🫠 Canon is with me on this surprisingly, at least in some cases. From the wiki:

When it comes to education, Isagi's not into theory-heavy subjects like STEM. He also signals out art alongside PE as his favourite subject. Although he doesn't note art as a hobby, he does like football video games.

This is all we have on the romance front from the Egoist Bible. We also know he didn't receive any Valentine's Day chocolates prior to Blue Lock. 🥲 RIP Isagi's love life. I'm taking the diagram to mean Isagi sees himself wanting a relationship in future.

From this Reddit post of translations of Egoist Bible character polls:

It's not much, but neither Isagi or the others rank him as much of a studier. (I find it really funny that the characters think Rin and Sae are top-notch brainiacs, but that's outside the scope of this exercise).

Isagi's attitude towards fashion? I mean...

This is what the guy chose to wear on his one outing from football prison. 🙃 Nuff said.

My most tenuous evidence comes courtesy of the light novel. It revealed Isagi has unusually keen senses, particularly eyesight and hearing:

Going off this, baseball, with the crack of bats, frequent announcements and loud cheers, might be sensory overload for Isagi. Football must be less overwhelming, at least if you're a player?

The French scanlation of the chapter 254 diagram makes reference to baseball being 'too loud', which also guided my thinking on this.

While Isagi isn't outwardly materialistic in the same way Reo or Shidou are, it's not beyond his interest. I know he was staring at the bids because he's so hung up on beating Rin... but money comes into it too for Isagi. If only because, players with the highest bids = strikers with the most outstanding talent. It's a status symbol for him.

As for the friends thing? No evidence needed. Y'all know Isagi would throw each and every friend he has under the bus, if it gets him closer to being the top striker 💀

It doesn't mean he's not a nice person or antisocial. I interpret it as, being a social butterfly isn't something that drives Isagi. He's more interested in other pursuits.

This in-universe character polls say it well: Isagi's a good communicator, rather than someone with heaps of friends. His calm personality and insight draws people in, rather than him seeking out friends or followers.

[galedekarios]

Hello! I hope you have a nice day. I just wanted to point out that during the tiefling party in act 1, Gale (I can't remember exactly what he said) but he says that his close circle is very VERY small and that he has a bunch of colleagues and acquaintances but not many friends. Then there's a dialogue option to tell him that you would be glad to be his friend.

Then in the epilogue he says that his friends at the yawning portal were left with quite an impression of Tav/PC. Friends! Either I'm reading his tone wrong, or reading into it too much, but it's as if Tav/the PC helped expand Gale's close circle (as the dialogue option before this mentioned that Tav/the PC made him 'put down his quill' and enjoy Waterdeep). I just think it's sweet.

this is such a great observation, anon! these are the conversation you are referring to:

gale at the tiefling party in act i:

Gale: [about Tara] I wish she were here for me to make a formal introduction, but I would never ask her to undertake such a journey. She is safer at home. Besides, she was always telling me I needed to spread my wings, so to speak. Find mortal friends, instead of hanging onto Mystra's coattails. So that's what I'm doing. I hope. Player: You don't have any friends? / Player: No one came to visit you during your confinement? Gale: Sadly not. If I'm being entirely honest, my social circle is rather small. More of a dot. Or a pinhead. I've got aquaintances, certainly. Plenty of colleagues. But friends? Those are precious indeed. I hope, though we've only known each other for a short time, I might be able to count you among that number?

and

Player: You must have been lonely, with only Tara for company... Gale: Sometimes. But I imposed it upon myself, after all. I set up enough wards to keep an army at bay, never mind the few colleagues who sought to inquire about my welfare. Gale: Tara did her best to keep my spirits up, of course, but there's only so much one tressym can make up for one's entire social circle. And she was often gone seeking items to treat my condition. Gale: You're the first person I've spent any significant time with in a year or more. Spending time in your company, I realise that I may have left behind the greater part of my wit, and sensitivity, in my tower. Player: I rather like the Gale stood in front of me. In fact, I'd like to see more of him...

compared to what he says in the epilogue:

Gale: Teaching at Blackstaff Academy has proven such an unexpected pleasure. Sometimes I find it hard to tear myself away. Just one of the myriad unexpected ways life has delighted me in recent months. Even my own city feels new to me, now that I share it with you. Player: Probably because I make you put down your quill once in a while and enjoy it. Gale: That you do. I've not had so much fun in Waterdeep since my own days as a wayward Blackstaff apprentice. You've certainly made quite the impression on my friends down at the Yawning Portal. The last I heard, they were thinking of naming a drink after you.

he really came into his own in this ending.

thank you so much for your message! 🖤

[sea-buns]

not really, but I suppose that’s just a difference of opinion. I do think that gorgug’s nightmare sequence was one of the weakest, especially with how it shifted topics (being dead, small spaces, not being able to escape a stereotype, because if any of these had been expanded on that would’ve been great), but I do think a lot of gorgug’s character revolves around feeling in-between, or too much one thing and not another and trying to close that gap. The best one for me was deffo the sphinx tho, I interpreted it as not *just* about him being dumb, but rather like. You’re big and dumb and strong and your main job is getting angry and hitting shit with an axe. You went to a community of gnomes and they gave you a better axe, and you loved it. You are uniquely dumb, unlike those who have come before you, because you cannot solve a specific kind of puzzle while a sphinx talks at you. You are the reason your parents cut contact, and from the beginning you were unsuited for their home. Your extended family predicted that you would grow to know only rage, and here you are, a barbarian. You, from this perspective, are not proving them wrong.

I do think that that whole sequence does reveal that he’s afraid of like. Being that stereotype? And then going yeah sure I’m stupid eat me, then moving forward and clawing your way into understanding anyways

Ahhh I see. Yeah I think I did misunderstand your first ask a bit lol

I did really love a lot of the topics his sequence brought up. Like I've read some incredibly well-written fanfics that covered the ways that claustrophobia, and imposter syndrome, and being dead have affected him. But like you said, if they had just honed in on at least one, rather than hopping back and forth, it could have done so much for that section. Cuz, personally, I don't feel like we saw Gorgug be significantly affected by any of those. At least not in a way that felt complete and satisfying.

I really like what you said about his character being "in-between". I totally agree. Kinda circles back to how his parents trying to help him calm his rage was actually stifling him.

Your family needs you to calm down; you've broken another bedchairdoorappliance. Your teacher wants you to rage; he says anger is good but you don't understand. You sing to try and calm yourself, you're always trying to be kind to others; they only use it to hurt you more and all you can do is get angry back. Your friends need you to rage. You don't have the power to protect them socially, but this you can do. You try not to rage outside of a fight, but.... they don't seem to be that bothered when you do. In fact, you watch them provoke physical confrontation when they're mad on many occasions.

(Oops dipped a biiiit into the pot of how important friendship is to his character. Did not mean to lol it's just one of my fav things about him so it's kinda subconscious I guess)

But yeah! He's also in such a limbo this season as well! You can't do this you're too angry, you're not smart enough for that, you don't rage right.

Also realllyy like your interpretation of his trial. The angle you described it at was really interesting.

I don't think stereotype is the right word, though. I would say... he's afraid of becoming a self-fulfilling prophecy? I'm assuming based on your own "stereotype?" that you weren't sure about the word either.

I don't think Gorgug is, or would ever be, afraid of being a "stereotype". Like I don't think he gives a shit about the stereotype that orcs/half-orcs/barbarians only know anger and destruction. I think he's afraid of being a self-fulfilling prophecy of all the things people say that he is. Stupid, mindless, destructive, etc. To pull from what you said here (which it wont let me copy paste on mobile god fucking damnit)

"Your extended family predicted that you would grow to know only rage, and here you are, a barbarian. You, from this perspective, are not proving them wrong."

"Stereotype" for sure applies to his racist extended family. They fucking breathe stereotypes like oxygen. But the bit where his afraid of becoming what everyone says he is, I think "self-fulfilling prophecy" suits that much better. He believes he can be more than that, he knows he can, but it doesn't change the fact that they are technically right.

Okay and the giving in but then "clawing your way into understanding anyways" actually goes so hard lol. Anon, you are so right. From that pov, it's not so much a give up as it is an acknowledgment before he essentially puts the subject on ice.

Rings back a bit to the start of fhjy to me. That dread of seeing the email of school starting back up again, and the terrible sinking pit in your stomach of avoidance, because the time has come to really unpack all that. There was something specific Zac said in his little Gorgug recap before the season started that was about, like, the dread of having to figure out who the fuck you're gonna be when everyone around you seems to have their shit together. That. That hit hard lmao but the experience that he's covered is very true to Gorgug, I think.

I totally misunderstood your first ask! Though I'm happy you sent another cuz I understand a lot better, I think. And tbh I've never had the opportunity to discuss that section of fantasy high with anyone? I wasn't on tumblr or watching d20 when it first aired so I missed these specific topics. Always been v interested in what others thought of his part. Maybe I should put the vods on in the bg next time I'm play sdv. Give em a relisten. And man. The fact that I'm out here quoting your message brings me back to english class so hard. Shocked I don't hate it. Actually having a topic you give half a shit about does wonders huh lmao

Thanks for the ask! You have altered my perspective and I appreciate it. It's like how sometimes you gotta read something out loud to understand it. If all I have is the walls of my own skull, I can only get so far.

[weirdraccoon]

Depressed MC

*Implied self-harm but nothing graphic, not even a hint.*

Also, I just went through something, so, I can say that if you feel like self-destruction is an option, I will tell you that no, it is not. But if you still wanna do it, at least text me and we can self-destroy together. That could be a good first step for healing (how can we come back to the surface if we don't reach rock bottom? Follow me for more unhealthy advice lol)

also @theauthor2103 here it is, finally! I'm sorry it took so long, as previously stated, I was at rock bottom, but I'm climbing back, tripping here and there, and going down a few times, but coming back slowly and surely!

Ominis sensed her running around. It was common on her, true, but after all that happened with the repository and the goblins, Ominis thought she’d want to take it easier this year.

And, there was something just out of character with the way she kept running from one place to another. Talking to more people than she used to, meeting with strangers at Hogsmeade to socialize. Keeping herself as busy as possible, be it with homework, favors, or her new so-called friends.

“She’s just expanding her social circle, Ominis,” Sebastian would say. “She looks fine.”

However, Ominis sensed it.

Something was not right.

So, he kept an eye on her. Well, his wand to be more precise. Which was more difficult because she tended to disappear a lot. And no matter who he asked, they all said she looked just fine.

“She’s even more friendly this year,” Poppy said. “Even helped me with some puffskein offspring last week. And you know how she hated their fur on her robes.”

Ominis simply hummed and continued his watch. If she realized he was stalking her, she didn’t say anything.

Not even a joke.

Yes, Ominis was worried.

And then, one day, she just stopped.

Ominis waited for her to arrive at breakfast.

He waited for her to run around as usual.

He waited for her to show up to class.

“Mr. Gaunt, Mr. Sallow, did Mrs. Seaburgh mention going out? Or feeling sick?”

“No, professor,” Sebastian frowned. “We can go check on the infirmary if you want?”

“No, no, that’s all right,” Fig shook his head. “I’m sure she’s fine.”

Ominis frowned. 

He might not be able to see, but he could hear. Fig was worried.

That got him more worried.

“Let’s look for her,” he whispered to Sebastian.

“But Fig said-

“Come on, Sebastian,” Ominis muttered, rolling his eyes. “I know you two had a fight but aren’t you a little bit worried? Let’s just look for her and make sure she’s all right.”

Sebastian sighed.

“All right,” he drawled. “But I bet she’s sleeping off whatever she had yesterday. Did you notice how she left with those seventh years? I didn’t know she cared so little about us.”

About me.

Ominis remained silent. He’d known Sebastian for a long time, and he knew his best friend could be dense most of the time.

They didn’t find her in the infirmary, the library, or the gardens.

“She’s in the dormitory,” Natsai told them. “She wasn’t feeling too well this morning, but she made me promise not to tell the professors. Light food poisoning according to her,” she shrugged.

“Told you,” Sebastian whispered. “Food poisoning, more like a nasty hangover or even more mallow sweet than her usual.”

Ominis pursed his lips.

Em-Sea was absent for another day, and when she came back, an odd odor was following her. Not like mallow sweet or butter or even whisky, something… unpleasant.

“Ugh, do you think she’s taken a shower at all?” One of the seventh-years near them grimaced. “Can’t believe I humped that.”

“What did you expect from a mud-blood,” another one said. “I told you it was a bad idea.”

“Hey, it was great at the moment,” the first one shrugged. “Somewhat desperate and whiny for my taste but you know how girls are.”

Sebastian was already gripping his wand so tight, Ominis feared he would break it under his own hand, stopping him from doing something idiotic in the middle of the Great Hall.

“Those- That- What was she thinking!”

“Sebastian,” Ominis tried.

“No!” He yanked his hand from Ominis’ and stormed off, muttering about her not caring and not loving him or herself and how he’d blow their bodies to pieces.

Ominis sighed.

When he tried to look for her again, she was already gone.

And she stayed gone for another two days.

Until Fig asked him to accompany him to the infirmary. It was a scary day, for him, when Fig almost begged him to follow him and help her. He thought Em-Sea was dying.

He wasn’t too far off.

Em-Sea was lying on a hospital bed. She was awake. But she was silent.

“Here Em-Sea,” Fig said, pushing Ominis to sit on the bed at her feet. “If you won’t believe me, then listen to Mr. Gaunt. We all know he doesn’t lie and he never sugarcoats things. If he tells you you are loved then will you believe it?”

Ominis blinked, feeling flabbergasted and a bit out of his depth.

What exactly happened?

“Em-Sea? Are you all right?” He asked, squeezing her leg and tightening his grip when she tried to pull away.

“If yo don’t tell him, I will,” Fig threatened. “This is no joke,” he- he cried. “I don’t know what push you to it but your friends will find out sooner or later.”

Ominis’ insides froze.

“What did you do, Em-Sea?”

He knew.

He knew she had been acting out of character. He knew she had been on a journey of self-destruction. He knew she had been keeping busy for a reason.

He had felt the need too.

Before.

But she was better. She was sun and light and love. Everything he was not.

“Em-Sea,” he teared up. “You are one of my best friends. You- you are the reason I didn’t do anything stupid. Oh, lords-

He couldn’t continue, he gripped her leg and cried. Silently.

When he heard her sniffles, he threw himself into her arms. Fig followed. And as awkward as it was, Ominis stayed there, clutching the girl into his chest while Fig hugged them both.

“I’m sorry I didn’t try harder to get close,” Ominis babbled. “I knew you were hurting but I didn’t know it was this bad.”

Fig sighed, a few tears running down his face.

“At least yo noticed,” he murmured. “I thought- well, it doesn’t matter. You’ll be fine, Em-Sea. I’m here for you.”

“Me too,” Ominis reassured. “And Poppy and Garreth and Sebastian,” Em-Sea tensed. “No, listen, Em-Sea, I know you had your issues but even if never date him again he’s your friend. We all love you more than you’ll ever know and we will be here for you, wether you like it or not.”

Em-Sea teared up again. She hid her face in Ominis’ shoulder.

She didn’t say anything.

Ominis understood.

You’ll be fine. We got you.

[max1461]

I grew up in a moderately physically isolated area (not actually far from more populous areas, but completely non-walkable such that I couldn't possibly get anywhere as a kid without my parents driving me there). This was bad for me socially and, in retrospect, was an obvious contributor to my unhappiness at that age, and it's one of the reasons I'm so vehement in my desire for walkable urban planning.

But, ok, presumably there will always be rural areas and physically isolated areas.

Should people not be allowed to live in physically isolated areas? I would find that quite unjust, since there are plenty of people who clearly desire that kind of isolation and dislike dense cities. In order to serve their needs, people need to be able to live in isolated areas if they want.

Should people who live in isolated areas not be allowed to have kids? That strikes me as an obvious violation of reproductive rights. It also seems plainly unjust to me.

Should children born in physically isolated areas be condemned to isolation? After all, this isolation inherently seems to give their parents greater ability to exercise arbitrary authority over them, it seems detrimental to the goal of expanding the autonomy of children and adolescents.

My instinct is to try to square this circle with an engineering solution. Maybe the right application of transportation technology or communications technology or the right social institution or government policy can eliminate the seeming conflict here. That's why I like engineering solutions: sometimes, they mean that we don't have choose. Everyone gets what they want.

And my hope is that for every apparent trade-off like this there exists an engineering solution. But that probably isn't true. I don't really have a point with this post other than to make clear where I am in my political and social thinking right now. I am constantly grappling with trade-offs like this.

I guess the point is that pluralism is hard. Believing, as I do, that any just world must accommodate the preferences of diverse types of people implies an infinite number of conundra like this. It's easier, I think, it requires less work, to believe that there is one right way to live and if everyone is simply made to live that way we'll all be happy (or those of us that won't be happy are outliers not worth worrying about). But I don't think this is true. And if you take seriously the idea that this is not true, politics and justice start to look like very complex things indeed.

[indigosabyss]

Unexpected Baggage Pt 4

They had scarcely been fished out of the ocean and given towels to dry themselves off when Charles was already herding Erik towards Raven.

"This is my sister." He explained quickly, as the two sized each other up. She's like us, he added mentally, sensing Erik's defensiveness.

Erik pinned him with a look, "Is that your only trick?" He asked. 

Charles shrugged, "More or less, I can read people's thoughts."

He didn't spend much time dwelling on the more malicious uses for his abilities.

Erik continued looking at him with a considering look, gears turning in his head.

Before he could give into his urge to look deeper than just vague impressions, Erik asked him outright, "Is there a range? For how far you can read a person?"

"Uh, well, I never tried to experiment much, but I'd say a mile? Maybe??" He hazarded to guess, unsure what Erik meant by the question.

"Why're you asking?" Raven asked bluntly.

Erik looked at her again, "I need help finding someone."

Charles licked his lips, "Well, in that case, I'm sorry, but I can't help you. I know what you'll do to the unlucky fellow when you find them."

Erik huffed a laugh, "I'm not going to kill them. I know how to find my targets by myself. This is a favor to someone else."

"Someone not hellbent on vengeance?" Charles asked. Somehow he doubted Erik socialized much outside of that circle.

"Yes." Erik agreed emphatically, "She's waiting on the docks and needs help from someone like you. I'll introduce you when we get back to shore."

Raven and Charles looked at each other, and Raven shrugged in whats-the-harm way.

[this got longer than expected, so the rest is under the cut]

Back on shore, Charles convinced their CIA escort to let them slip away from the hubbub, letting Erik lead the way towards the dark containers.

"She's around here somewhere." Erik assured them distractedly, cupping his hands around his mouth, "Kamala!"

A consciousness nearby sparked in recognition at the call. Charles turned at the right time to see a person walking up to them.

On first look, she was a young girl, perhaps in her mid teens, and on the shorter side if that. She was also radiating amusement.

"Hey, Erik." She said between laughs, "I saw the Coast Guard got called in. What happened to me being a liability?"

"The Coast Guard wasn't my fault." Erik told her crisply, "And you would have alerted them faster if you came with me."

"Alright, Mr 'I Am The Night, I Am Vengeance'." She put on a growly voice before collapsing into peels of laughter.

"I never said that." Erik ducked away to clarify to Charles, before shaking his head at her, "I brought these people to help you find your friend, but if you're just going to laugh at me-"

"Wait, really?" The girl gravitated towards them, hopping slightly in place, "Hi! How're you planning to do that? Why's Erik trusting you with this? What're your names? I'm Kamala Khan, by the way."

"Raven." She was grinning as she shook the new girl's hand.

"Charles Xavier." He repeated the greeting, "And Erik has been very accommodating of us because we all have a commonality."

Kamala squinted at them, "You all... hate Shaw." She guessed.

"No." Though goodness knew the man deserved to be hated, with what he saw in Erik's mind, "We all have a mutation in our genes which allows us incredible powers."

There was a faraway look in Kamala's eyes as she muttered, "Holy shit. Bruno was right?"

"Kamala has powers too." Erik cut in, "There's a lot going on with her except that, too, but she's a mutant."

"Oh?" Raven cocked her head, "What can you do?"

Kamala beamed, and held up her right hand into a fist.

A layer of purple light began to flow over the hand, fluid for barely a moment before it was crystallizing into a brightly glowing solid. A translucent shell under which he could still see the normal flesh and blood.

But it didn't end there.

The glowing fist began to expand, until it was about the size of a bowling ball. Kamala frowned in concentration as she opened the fist, flexing each finger, before stretching it forward to poke Charles.

The construct was a sharp contrast of warm and cold, and the contact was surprisingly solid, sending him stumbling back an inch.

Raven let out a shocked laugh, "That's a good trick."

Kamala beamed again. Literally, this time. The purplish glow had formed a halo around her face. 

For the last eighteen years, Raven had been his only proof that there were others like him in the world. That mutants weren't a far off hypothetical. And now in short order Charles had found five others, two of which were on his side.

It was a heady feeling.

[ludwigplayingthetrombone]

Hello! Firstly I wanted to say that I'm an old fan since your overwatch days and I've always admired how much depth you're giving all the characters and relationships you touch! I'm talking like, mariana trench DEPTHS. And how confident you seem about just doing the things you enjoy and exploring the themes you want? I really respect that.

I'm having a bit of an art crisis recently and I was wondering If you could offer some advice?

I'm thinking about self-indulgence in art, particularly fanart. I like to dive in deep to expand on characters, I find it as enjoyable as creating my own work. But I fear of people getting angry at me for latching onto these characters, thay they'll say the original work wasn't THAT deep, or that I'm completely wrong or cringe or whatever. And I don't care about being right or anything, I just want to have fun here and tell my little stories? :( The fear is making me keep the work to myself and I don't know what to do. Would it be better to just enjoy it on my own?

Your blog really is goals when it comes to that, so I'll respect your opinion a lot. Thank you for your time!

holy moly thank you so much for your sincerity first of all!! Second, this is making me misty eyed ngl!! I have alot to say about this so i shall put it under a read more bc im gonna ramble

If someone cares about you fixating on your fave characters, then they're usually the fucking weirdos in this situation if they dont just block you and move on. I LOVE making shit up about my faves like i have a modern au hc that kakashi and gai are ddr competition rivals and i gave yeehan 7 dogs just for funsies!! we were in the trenches in early overwatch making up our own lore bc there was none and it was so fun

I've always been like that now that i look back bc when i first started uploading my shitty ms paint fanart on deviant art in like 2006(naruto funnily enough we've come full circle) i was still drawing cringey shit /I/ wanted to see. I don't agree with almost all of it today, but i remember the fun i had while making it, and that's really the trick. Drawing what you personally want to see then people can come and go audience wise. If they like it, they like it, if they dont? oh well! There's people who still follow me from when i was 14 and i follow them even tho we're in completely different spaces now.

The fanart part i vibe with personally bc im really bad at coming up with totally original work and premises. i much prefer having pre-established rules and worlds to work with (plus the characters i love getting massacred in the writing i HAVE to save them)

Just existing online will garner you mean comments or asks, and my best advice is its not worth it to take the bait even if its absolutely absurd and wrong, i just block and go now, and im much happier :) this all being, of course, as long as what you're doing isnt harmful, bc even with good intentions, you'll mess up/blunder eventually. If the heat gets too much for you, no one will judge you for withdrawing your art from social media. thats a perfectly safe thing to do to keep it for yourself.

As an adult, shits not that serious im 28 drawing naruto fanart bc it makes me happy after a long day of work, so have fun!! art's supposed to be fun don't let the fear win i love sharing my art with strangers on the internet!! Hope this made any sense at all and I wish you the best, my friend!!! If you ever wanna dm me, feel free

[thoughtfulfangirling]

I once again largely want to appreciation the animation. Brooklyn looks so badass here!! He's so pissed!

And it's so interesting to me that the consistent dialogue surrounding this bike that included the others suddenly is gone. It's "My bike!" It could have just as easily been said to be "our" bike. I'm not sure what exactly I want to make of this. I think I'm leaning toward him feeling very alone here, in this moment. Broadway and Lexington aren't being attacked by a group of people he'd hoped were kindred spirits, he is. It's because of their intent to harm him that the bike gets destroyed, not any particular ire against the bike or what he and his rookery mates created. And I can hardly begrudge him the feeling of that.

And knowing what comes next and what has just occurred, it's actually kind of brilliant to evoke in our audience the sense of isolation this shift invokes. He is all alone in the world except for his very small circle. A circle that will not seem to expand despite repeated efforts to do so. They keep giving humans the chance to show an instinct for kindness, and they keep being failed.

And it's really interesting to me. I don't know if I actually wrote it out because I wasn't totally sure how to connect the thoughts, but both Elisa and Xanatos make their moves toward friendship in isolation (more or less). There aren't others around.

What would have happened if Elisa had had coworkers around her when she encountered the gargoyles? Would her reactions be different? I would like to say they wouldn't be, and I think the creators would argue it wouldn't be, but I can't honestly say that I'd think so. Peer pressure and social systemic structures are powerful and have a sway in our lives we'd be fools to ignore completely.

It's just... my brain keeps mulling over the dynamics presented here. Even their interaction in the pilot with Tom started off more on more one-on-one feet. The intent was more youth meeting youth, and that's not a dynamic we've come back to, but it was mainly just Tom and Brooklyn immediately in front of him, and that was a hopeful interaction until the group grew... / adults got involved.