#I'll say it one last time: I don't blame anybody for this but me and my stupid head

[mitamicah]

Some fun transmasc angst ahead /s to those who dare enter

Maybe I should've listen to the voice inside telling me that posting that last blog post to my diary blog was a mistake.

Honestly I am so very close to delete the post.

Everytime I see notes coming on it I feel worse.

I know that you are trying to help me, but it makes me feel quite bad.

Before I continue however let me say it once (and definitely not the last time)

It is not your fault.

Hearing people saying 'it is not that bad!' and 'I have had it worse!' or 'I'm a cis woman and it happened to me'... I understand it is meant to cheer me up. It is not.

Because then the voice inside me starts to whisper:

"See? You are pathetic! You are making mountain out of ant hills again! Your insecurities are so dang tiny, and so the only logical conclusion is that you are worthless for even thinking about them in the first place."

Don't get me wrong, I know this is not what you meant to say. And I understand where you are coming from. It might not look bad. I have come to realise that it is probably worse in my head. I am on my way to learn to live with it and hopefully starting to like it because what is the alternative really? Yet I'm still far from there so it haunts me at times thinking about how I've seen the spots get bigger and bigger day by day for three or four years and I have had days full of worry that my hair would fall out (my grandfather was bald at 25 so it is in my genetics) and what I'd do then as (I believed I was back then) cisgender woman!

Now I know I'm a transmasculine person and so baldness is not that big of a deal. Still this is a sore subject, so hearing you say it is nothing?

Again, I don't blame you. But at the same time I cannot control my feelings. Especially not gender dysphoria.

I admittedly half chose to start minoxidil to hopefully make these spots smaller - so who knows if they have actually closed up a bit since April where I began on the dosis. (I definitely know that I've gotten way more chin hairs and upper lip hairs since starting!)

And to the well meaning cisgender woman - you telling me, that you experience this as your gender is sadly not making things better; it reminds me that I am biologically closer to you than I am to a man. And so it only feeds my dysphoria.

I must sound like a broken record but I do not blame you, friends and random people I've never met. This is just one of my biggest bodily insecurities and it hurts hearing it being made out to be nothing. Because if I stress over nothing, am I worth anything myself?

This post is having no point other than have me write out my sadness so hopefully the few people bothering reading it is okay with me repeating myself and being a bit cry baby yet again. One would think I've grown out of my teenage vainness but jokes on me I guess.

[mcflymemes]

PROMPTS FROM SONGS ON MY PLAYLIST *  assorted lines from random songs, adjust as necessary

i can't forget this evening, or your face as you were leaving.

you always smile, but in your eyes your sorrow shows.

the sun is going down. it's getting dark.

you look bewildered.

i can't give anymore.

you know i want to do it again.

better things will come our way.

you were always there for me.

i know it's not mine, but i'll see if i can use it.

i see the light in your window.

you know i tried, and i'm sorry.

kiss me if you mean all the things that you say.

one night can make a difference.

please don't leave me hanging.

it's just heartbreaking.

i've got such a long way to go.

i don't want to do your dirty work.

i want you to know that i'm happy for you.

i should have known that it would let me down.

i used to dream about this town.

it's such a shame about it.

there's always magic in the air.

they're dead wrong. i know they are.

nobody's supposed to be here.

tell me what's wrong.

put your arms around me, baby.

show me where you've been.

it may sound funny, but i've come to get my money back.

i know you like what you see.

there is no way you can deny it.

you were always sure of yourself.

who's to blame?

i've had enough of walking from place to place.

you're not what we're looking for.

honestly, i'm not trying to be anybody but me.

can i see you later?

i kinda hope we get stuck.

do you think anybody's actually gonna dance to this?

the answers you seek will never be found at home.

i don't want to leave the comfort of this place.

let's make our escape.

i feel like i'm alive for the very first time.

it's been a while.

i'm not sure why i called.

i was thinking maybe later on we could get together for a while.

it's been such a long time and i really do miss your smile.

it really doesn't matter much to me.

i won't ask for promises, so you don't have to lie.

watch out. you might get what you're after.

we're in for nasty weather.

here's your ticket.

you might need a raincoat.

you can go. sleep at home tonight.

who are you?

i really want to know.

god, there's got to be another way.

it's the one good thing that i've got.

i would really, really love to stick around.

i think there's something you should know.

you made a lot of mistakes.

hey, it happens to us all.

you can do what you think is impossible.

don't close your eyes.

i want your love.

don't look back.

it's only been a week or two.

sooner or later, you'll come rolling back to me.

it gets so lonely here inside my head.

what's wrong with right here on the counter?

i had to stop for the night.

please bring me my wine.

last thing i remember, i was running for the door.

you can check out any time you like but you can never leave.

i'm just in awe of what's in front of me.

i'm sipping wine in a robe.

i look too good to be alone.

every word that i say is coming straight from the heart.

[minimomoe]

First I wanted to say your writing is AMAZING and SO GOOD!!!! Like everytime I think you've written the best thing I've ever read, you update again and top it!!

Second, just a thought I had but I think it would be so funny if one of y/n's clients lived in the apartment complex and heard them after the events of not just neighbors and the bonus. Like she shows up to her appointment and is like "oh wow did you have an interesting night 😏"

Also second side note: I just know that y/n is an amazing braided and doesn't pull that bs these new stylist try talking about come blowed dried already, $150 deposit fee, late fees, and all that 💀

(I'm gonna hit each point out of order lol) but firstlyyy thank you babe for the kind words <<33 Reader is definitely a hairstylist who cares about her craft. I'm talking licensed professional who works at a salon so none of that instagram stylist nonsense. I'll give you a little drabble of how this throuple works out with that idea you have because I love it: tags: fluff, poolverine throuple relationship stuff, mentions of sex, 1.2k words Not Just Neighbors part: One & Two

Honey! You Forgot Your Lunch!

You rushed into the salon with your face hot and apologizing profusely. Nobody gave you a hard time for coming in ten minutes later than usual but you felt horrible doing so. In fact, the other stylists were glad to see that you were okay since it was the first time that you were ever late. It immediately sparked a conversation among them as they watched you practically sprint to your work station. Luckily for you, you didn't have a client to service for another ten minutes, so you had plenty of time to prep your area.

"Are you sick? You should stay home if you are, we got enough people to cover," one of your coworkers said.

"Ain't gonna blame you if you overslept. Lord knows I've done it a million times," another chuckled.

"I'm good, thank you. It was just a little hard to get out of bed this morning," you muttered. There was no way you were going to tell the older women of the salon that you were late because both of boyfriends are handsy as an octopus and couldn't let you go despite time running out. Wade requested a kiss before you left and you granted it, only for him to beg for another and another until your lips felt swollen. Logan had intended to give you a short kiss but became greedy until you were breathless. Your knees turned to jello around those men, and you became their breakfast they had to devour before you could step foot out of the door.

"Are you sure baby? Your eyes are bloodshot! And your voice sounds rough!"

Memories of tears burning your eyes as Logan stroked your cheek while your face was stuffed full of his cock flashed in your mind. You had to shake it out of your head. "I didn't sleep much last night. Insomnia."

"Chamomile tea is good for sleeping at night and it soothes the throat. I got a brew you'd like," said the loctician from the corner of the store.

"I would love to try it," you smiled.

Just then your client and downstairs neighbor waltzed through the salon and plopped straight into her seat.

"You look like shit," she snorted.

"Good morning to you too," you rolled your eyes. "I feel like shit but I couldn't let you down now could I?"

"You really can't. I won't go to anybody else."

"You've always been loyal."

You only took off her bonnet before she whipped around to stare at you with a playful look. You stared right back with a confused air around you. "What KC?"

"Is the reason you like shit have anything to do with all that noise I heard last night, perchance?"

"You can't just say 'perchance', and I have no idea of what you're talking about."

"Sure," KC dragged out with waggling eyebrows. "I heard some funny noises come from above me."

"Wrong bitch," you scoffed.

"Right bitch. My ceiling was practically shaking like an earthquake and you the one who lives above me."

"I really don't know what your talking about." You tried to divert the conversation to asking her about the hairstyle KC wanted down but you were not off the hook. KC and the rest of the salon were now interested in your late night activities and you did not want to tell them about your sex life.

"Oh come on, spill the deets! Is it someone we know? That last boyfriend you had was a piece of shit so I hope this guy is better. He sounds better at least. You were getting dicked down."

"Jesus, stop talking," you groaned. "Pretend like you didn't hear anything. I'll be more mindful of the noise, I promise."

"Somebody was getting busy!" One of the older stylists yelled and it got whoops from across the salon. You buried your face in your hands.

The bell at the front door rang to signal another customer walking in. You peeked through the gaps of your fingers only to find that Wade Wilson and Logan Howlett both strolled inside of your salon in search of you completely suited up.

"Hello ladies," Wade whistled. "Do any of you know my sugar plum? She's about yeigh tall with the prettiest brown eyes you have ever seen but will take you out by the knees if given the chance? Yes? No?"

Logan sighed at the useless description he gave and said your name. "We just want to drop off her lunch and tell her bye before we head off on another mission."

A stylist in the front pointed in your direction and you crossed your arms over your chest. "What in the world are you two doing here?"

"We tried to call and you didn't pick up," Logan answered. He handed you your lunch bag and you softened up.

"You guys made me lunch?"

"Pffft no," Wade laughed. "I can't cook for shit and I'm sure anything he makes will taste like an MRE. We got you your favorites and stuffed them all in there."

"Oh... well thank you." The gesture still touched your heart. You put the bag down on a counter and sighed. "So I won't be seeing you for a while?"

"I know you'll miss me so that's why I left a life sized cardboard cut out of me with a strap attachment at your place. It's size accurate, veins included," Wade nudged.

Logan smacked the back of Wade's head for you. "You know we don't know how long we'll be away so we wanted to see you in person before we leave. Make sure you take care of yourself, bub."

"I always do," you sighed. Wade lifted the bottom half of his mask to kiss one side of your face while Logan kissed the other, sandwiching you in affection. "Come back to me, alright?"

"Aye, aye captain," Wade saluted. It got a chuckle out of you as he marched away from you before turning back around.

"I'm not crying," He sniffled. "Why do you ask?"

"She didn't ask," Logan deadpanned.

"But she's crying!"

"I'm not crying," you laughed. "But I will miss you. Now go, save the world!"

"Rain check on our anniversary date, yeah? We should go to a haunted house if it's still October when we come back. Or go in your haunted house if you know what I mean."

Logan grabbed Wade by the scruff of his neck and dragged him out of the salon. You were left with a audience of eyes trained on you as you laughed at your boys leaving.

"The both of them... you get the both of them..." KC mumbled. "That's not fair. You can't have two boyfriends. Give me the red one."

"Nuh-uh, she can keep the red one. I want the hunk-ules in the yellow," the receptionist said.

"I love you guys, but no way. They're mine and they're stuck on me," you smirked.

"Oh you don't sound like you're playing," KC laughed. "Wait... that means that last night..."

"Shut up."

"The both of them were..."

"If you say another word you better find someone else to do your hair," you warned.

"You're a pro-freak! Two men at one time! You get down and dirty."

"I need to find a new salon to work at,” you grumbled.

“Oh no you don’t. What you need to do is tell us exactly how you met those men without missing a single thing.” The whole shop muttered in agreement with KC. You rolled your eyes.

“Fine, but can you sit normally so I can finally wash your hair?”

Not Just Neighbors part: One & Two

Hehehe thank you for reading loveliessss.

M.list || Ao3 || Twitter || Ko-fi

[tinydefector]

Heyyy again i was the anon who requested for a Jazz smut a while back and im here for more

(this bot need more recognition and I love how you write him!)

anyways i was wondering if you could do another smut fic with him and a cybertronian reader it can be male or gn I don’t mind.

As for kinks maybe the reader dominates him or puts him in his place for acting like a brat? Only if you’re up for it 🩷

Secrets

Jazz x cybertronian reader

Word count : 1.1k

Warnings: smut, valveplug, Sub jazz, slight breeding kink, enermies/ lovers, Brat jazz

Masterlist

Jazz masterlist

______

"Oh look, I've caught myself a spy " they mech hums in amusement. Optics locked on the Autobot spy they had pinned underneath themself. Jazz grinned up at his captor, all easy charm even pinned beneath their bulk. "Aw cher, don' be like that, jus' wanted a lil peek is all. Didn't mean t' stir up trouble." 

He gave an experimental wiggle, testing their hold. Sure enough, their powerful struts don't budge. but he catches the faintest hint of amusement sparkling in their optics. “Yet here you are stirring up more trouble. Your Prime know you're out here?” They inquire. 

" Ain't no fun if he knows im ere?" Jazz tilted his helm, considering the mech above him a lil' closer this time. Strong and loyal to a cause, sure, but anybody worth their bolt had layers. But he also knows their guilty pleasure. They purr in amusement leaning down and tilt their faceplate inches from Jazz’s.  "Snooping through my things again Jazz,  though you learnt your lesson last time " it's just above a whisper as it filters through his audials. that sends a shutter down his frame. Jazz grinned innocently up at the looming mech, enjoying their close scrutiny. "Aw, c'mon - snoopin's in my job description, ya know that sugar." He wiggled teasingly beneath their weight. 

Hes bolder now with his movements, he tilted his hips in a subtle roll. "And if I recall right, last time ended real nice Sweetspark” his visor flashed as his optics flicker under. "Can't blame a mech for wantin' an encore." One hand crept free to trail boldly up their waist "Whaddaya say. play nice and I'll make it worth your time. Got all kinds a' new tricks I been dyin' t'try..." His field pulsed eagerly hoping they would take up the proposal. A little charm and they'd forget all about snoopin' infractions real quick. He relished the chase. but the catch was pretty fraggin' great too.

They are quick grabbing the servo dancing on their hip platting, pinning his arms above his helm roughly, grasping his faceplate with their other. "You're like a scraplet, being a pest in the most inconvenient of places" they muse before pulling him into a kiss.

Jazz made a muffled hum of pleasant surprise against their mouth. He squirmed just enough to test their grip. He hooked one leg around a thick hip strut, tilting wantonly into the kiss. His captor wasn't the only one who liked to tease and he was determined to win this fight. 

When they broke from the kiss, he grins cheekily up at them. "Careful now babydoll, keep kissin' me like that and I'll never want to leave." His fans had kicked on, venting warm and eager against their frame. Jazz rolled his unrestrained hips in a blatant invitation. They let out a deep rumble that builds up in their chassis,  grinding back against him for a moment. grab his hips roughly twisting him and flipping him over, pressing him face down onto the scattered tarps on the ground. "You'd crawl back even if I didn't kiss you, you're like a circuit booster addict" they beam in amusement at how easy he was being. One servo slides down to brush against his interface panel. "Gonna open that panel for me?, or are you going to be a pain in my aft" they hum into his audial receiver. Pressing a kiss to his shoulder plating.

Jazz let out a muffled noise of agreement against the floor, plating warming under caresses. He offered a coy wriggle in response, content for now to deny them access to anything hidden under the panel. Jazz cycles a whined vent as they grind against the panel, he can feel the transfluid basically leaking into the panel, his spike pressed against the plating uncomfortably. They huff lightly before wedging his panel open enough before it releases. "Slaghelm" they grumble to him, pressing two digits into his valve, teasingly slow, dragging another over his flickering node which has him whining into the tarp as his thighs spread wider. "You going to behave pretty mech?, you get rewards when you're good for me Jazz," he can hear the smirk in their voice without even looking at them. 

" ya got me, whatcha gonna do with me, hot stuff?" Jazz purrs, trying to regain some sort of composure only to mew as they shove their digits back into his valve scissoring him open. visor flashed bright as his optics short out with arousal. He arches up with a whine, grinding down on the servo between his thighs. It has him nearly speechless ask he moans, groans and whimpers with each touch. 

"Got you speechless already pretty mech. Didn't know all I had to do was stuff my digits in your valve. You're already dripping " they inform before thrusting their digits in again, watching the way his transfluid drinks down to his node as they tease and rub it. 

They slowly pull their digits out. Spreading Jazz's thighs.  "Primus you're pretty like this Jazz" they hum, interface panel snapping open as they grind their spike against his valve coating it in the pretty pink fluid, the teasing makes Jazz whimper and whine as he grabs the tarps. He tries to turn his helm to watch only for them to press his face back down into the tarp. slowly pressing their Spike into his Valve sinking in with small rolls of their hips. It has Jazz's engine choking and stuttering as if he had stalled. 

They moan loudly as they bottom out in Jazz's tight valve. Grinding deeper as they grip his hips dragging him back onto their spike. "Mmm look at that pretty little autobot spy spread nicely on my spike, might just have to keep you all to myself" they chuckle with a rough thrust.

Jazz couldn't help but let out a muffled keen, the sensation sending waves of pleasure through his systems making his plating shutter in delight. his hips involuntarily moving to meet their thrusts. "Mmm, Frag Cher," Jazz managed to stutter out, his voice overwhelmed with pleasure coursing through his circuits. "Look at you, moaning like a pleasure bot. You like being used as a little frag hole don't you pretty mech" the degrading comment has him clenching around them as their servo wraps around his spike. Each thrust has him rutting into their fist. 

 ", ain't no pleasure bot Sugar!," Jazz quipped, only to arch back into each thrust. A yelp leaves him as they pull him up to rest on his knee plates as they continue to thrust up into him, their servo working his spike as they littler kisses up his neck cables. 

"Mmm think your Prime would be pissed if I fill you tight valve, send you back to the Autobot base dripping my transfluid, mmm bet it be a sight to see, spark you up,  make Prime lose his best field mech" they hum in thought, it was a tempting idea but they both knew it wasn't something either of them could afford. But for now they would just enjoy the secret meetings. 

___________

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[athena-studios]

ָ࣪ 𓏲⋆.ָ࣪ 𓏲⋆.ָ࣪ 𓏲⋆.

'Tis the damn season

ted nivison x singlemom! reader

synopsis: you and Ted hook up one night, him taking your virginity, he leaves the next morning with no note or goodbye. a month later you find out your pregnant with his baby, so you do everything you can to protect it. a year later, you and Ted see each other on the street, seeing your daughter and wanting to be a part of her life.

word count: 1.2k

tw: small descriptions of smut(in the conext of ted and y/n recalling their night, not anything to graphic), mentions of reader not being able to sleep very well

a/n: hi! i started working on this yesterday and now I'm really proud of it, it's my baby now. lmk if a part 2 is wanted!

the hospital room filled with cries of a baby. your baby, your daughter, dorothea. You and Ted's daughter. then it hits you. He doesn't know. Ted doesn't know he's a father. and you don't know how to contact him. the last you saw of him was 9 months ago, in your bed, both of you naked. it was a one night stand you didn't want to happen. but when you found out you were pregnant, everything changed.

That was 3 months ago. Now you were out on the streets, walking around with a bag of baking supplies in one hand, Dorothea, or Thea as you'd like to call her, on the other. when you walked to the other side of the street towards a café, you heard your name being called.

"y/n?" no. no no no. Why was he here? He's not supposed to be here, you weren't supposed to see him!

you whip your head to the sound of the all too familiar voice. "...hi, Ted." you reply blatantly as you adjust Thea on your hip.

he looks at you with a slight smile, before realizing that you have a baby in hand.

a baby...is it his? he doesn't know. might as well ask.

"Is it...is it mine?" he asks with hesitation blended into his voice while he scratches the back of his neck in nervousness.

"what if i told you she is?" you answer, getting slightly defensive.

and Ted looks stunned. like he had just seen a ghost. Can you blame him? He just found out he's a father! I mean, you technically can blame him 'cause he left you that morning without anything to go by.

“oh…uhm, well then did you maybe wanna…have some coffee with me? Y'know…t-talk about it?” Ted talks with a soothing voice, almost as if you would break if he went a decibel over. 

you nod at his offer, walking into the café with him and sitting down on one of the more excluded booths in the corner. you situate Thea on your lap as Ted sits across from you, avoiding eye contact.

“What's her name?” He asks, still hesitant.

“Dorothea, but I call her Thea most of the time.” you answer his question in an emotionless voice before an uncomfortable silence overtakes the two of you.

“so…I wanted to start by saying I'm sorry—” you cut him off.

“sorry for what? sorry for leaving me alone after you took my virginity?” you were angry. you told him that night that you were a virgin, just to leave you with your overthinking ass.

“y/n, please, I'm sorry. I know sorry doesn't cut it, but I will do anything to make it up to you. I wanna be part of our daughter's life.” Ted pleads, and he means it. he would buy everything in the world for you and Thea if it meant you would even just think about forgiving him.

“Ted…I tried, I really tried. i tried to look for you, i went back to the bar to ask if anybody knew you, but nobody did.” your eyes well with tears, but you refuse to let them fall. no way were you crying in front of this man.

“Please, if you could just let me be a part of her life that would be enough. or i could give you child support, how much do you need?—” he starts listing off things that could possibly help you, eventually making your head hurt.

“fine.”

“fine…?”

“Yes, Ted. fine, I'll let you be part of her life. we can co-parent, but don't think I've forgiven you.” and at that, he smiles. a big smile, a grin from ear to ear.

“y/n, you don't know how much this means to me. Thank you so much, I promise I'll try my best.” 

you let out a tight smile, maybe this could actually be helpful. Y'know, lesson those sleepless nights of yours. “You can start by giving me your number so I can contact you.”

Ted proceeds to give you his number, still saying thank you. “Ted, shut up before I change my mind.” and at that, he shuts his mouth, also stopping the headache about to form, giving you peace.

Obviously, that peace is quickly disturbed when Thea starts thrashing around on your lap. “shh, Thea it's ok, you're fine mama's here.” you cradle her in your arms. “Can we move outside? Thea's getting a little cranky.”

“Of course, I'll grab her baby bag.” Ted speaks and wraps his hands around the handle of the bag. He follows you outside of the café and into the street.

you try calming her down, but she won't. you know she's hungry, but she already drank the bottle you bought for her. so you have to nurse her. and to nurse her, you have to be in private.

“Ted, I am so sorry and you can decline if you want, but Thea's hungry and she already had the bottle we bought with us. I'm gonna have to nurse her back home, can you come with us?” you offer. Ted notices the worried look on your face as you speak, also noticing the faint eyebags under your eyes.

“I don't mind at all. I can come with you, it's fine. I can drive you?” he grabs his keys from his pocket after you give a thankful nod. 

quickly driving and giving him the directions to your apartment building, you finally arrive.

“take your shoes off when you enter. It's pretty small, I know. but it's the only thing I can afford right now.” you inform Ted and walk into the familiarity of your small home.

you sit on the couch, Ted sitting down and placing the Baby bag next to the two of you. you pull your shirt and your bra up before Thea latches on to your breast.

Ted stares. remembering the way the swell of your breasts felt that night, now it's bigger, fuller.

half an hour later, you've already set Thea on her crib asleep. You're now in the living room with Ted, talking about how you two were gonna do this.

“So, I could come by every other day, I'd text you first, and help you out with Thea or anything. my number is always free for you to call if you need anything, and I'll be giving you money every week for Thea, rent, anything you might need it for.” Ted repeats back everything you two had discussed since you had put Thea to sleep.

“yep, and I still haven't forgiven you. so don't think of this as anything.” you look up at his eyes, seeing the familiar glint in them from a year ago.

“don't worry, I've got it controlled.” 

you lean back down on the couch closing your eyes. “Ugh, I need a nap and shower.” 

“then go have a shower, take a nap, relax, do whatever you need and want to do. I'll be right here, and i can clean up for you.” Ted grins and stands up.

“Ted, are you sure? you don't have to do all of this suddenly just because you're a dad now.” you stand up as well, nervousness fillig your system.

“y/n, I'm doing this because i want to do this. not because I feel forced to or anything.”

“Thank you, this means way more than you can imagine.” you smile, tears welling up in your eyes.

“don't worry. you can take it as us starting over.” he hugs you as you sniffle.

maybe this isn't so bad after all…

part 2?

[ckret2]

The most unpleasant breakfast.

I feel like this picture is a perfect summary of the fic so far.

Chapter 5 of The Pines Capture Human Bill Cipher But Can't Tell Anybody Because They Don't Know Whether Killing Him Will Restart Weirdmageddon (title TBD). Masterpost here. Updated 8/7/2024 for TBOB compatibility!

####

The group asking for a seat at the truck stop diner was an odd sight: three adult men; two children; and then one disheveled barefoot lunatic in a cartoon pony toga, handcuffs, a chain restricting one arm, and the dirt-smeared remains of a butterfly marker mask. But truckers and odd sights were the only things you saw at 3 a.m. in a Roadkill County truck stop that was old enough to still have functioning pay phones, and the handcuffed guest wasn't blinking SOS in Morse code, so the weary party was escorted to the round corner booth without question. They sandwiched Bill between Soos and Stan and silently awaited their menus.

"Hey, I'm Dani, I'll be taking care of you tonight." A waitress passed out menus to the group, hesitated uncertainly with a couple of paper kids' menus in front of Dipper and Mabel, and handed them over when Mabel made grabby hands for the accompanying four-pack of crayons. "Can I start you off with some coffee, or...?" Dani's gaze fell on Bill and her face lit up. "Oh, hey! Toga Lady! Hi!"

Bill gave her a puzzled smile and raised brows. "Hello?"

"Oh, yeah dude!" Soos laughed. "Wendy got a picture of you the last time you came by. You're totally a local meme now."

"Okay, I've gotta know." The waitress gestured at Bill's ensemble with her pen. "What's your story?"

"Well—" Bill opened his mouth, and froze; and the whole table went still as they simultaneously had the same realization.

If anybody revealed Bill's identity, in Gravity Falls, the epicenter of Weirdmageddon, they'd have a mob on their hands. At worst the town would rip Bill to shreds, and at best they'd throw him in a cell so they could schedule his shredding for a pleasant Saturday afternoon when more people could watch.

Bill couldn't risk the possibility that he'd die for good, and the humans couldn't risk the possibility that he'd be re-released as a triangle.

None of them could reveal anything.

And all of them knew it.

"Party," Bill said. Warming to the cover story, he went on: "This is my party uniform. A little anachronistic, but what can I say? There's nothing I like better than being the center of attention at a wild party!" He cast a sideways glance toward the Stan twins. "Until the fun police break it up."

Ford grumbled, "Partying wasn't the problem. You were going to burn down the town."

"You get so worked up over a little bonfire, sheesh." Bill rolled his eyes, leaned toward the waitress, and said, "These geek types, I tell you. Some people wouldn't recognize a good time if it appeared to them in a divine vision."

"Maybe if I ever had a divine vision..."

Bill shot Ford a dirty look. They quickly broke off their mutual glare, conscious of Dani curiously watching, and Bill breezily explained, "He had a bad trip and still blames me for it."

Dani laughed. "You're crazy! What's your real name, Toga Lady?"

Bill hesitated. "Guess!"

"What?"

"Guess! It's a game. You guess mine, I'll guess yours."

She looked down at her name tag. "I already told you my name's Dani."

"But did you tell me it's Danielle Miranda?"

Her eyebrows shot up.

Bill beamed. "I'll give you three guesses! While you're thinking about that, could we get a round of coffee, and... do you serve anything more toxic than mildly spoiled apple juice? No? Just coffee."

"And a chocolate shake," Mabel threw in.

Bill's eyes lit up. "Make that two."

Stan snapped, "I am not paying for you to get a chocolate shake." Bill sighed.

Once the waitress was gone, Bill said, "Trauma still disrupts humans' long-term memories, right? Have the locals forgotten my name yet?"

"Yeah, no, everyone remembers," Soos said. "I know two different Williams that got their names legally changed."

Bill groaned. "Great. Terrific! Fine. I don't even care. My last pseudonym was getting stale anyway, it's about time I find a new one. Do I look like a Silas?"

The others stared at him. Stan said, "What?"

"A Silas, do I look like my name could be Silas."

"Sure, that sounds stupid enough for you."

Bill shot Stan a dirty look. "Fine, you try. I've spent the last couple of days getting killed, tortured, drugged, beaten, and starved—"

"Whoa, wait," Soos said, "you've been what?"

—so all I'm coming up with is 'Not-Bill' and 'the letter A.' Somebody else think of something."

Stan let out a loud sigh. "Who cares? Bob."

"No."

"Will."

"No, and you sound stupid."

"Hey—!"

Ignoring Stan's irritation, Bill looked around the table. "Anyone else?"

The others at the table considered the question. Soos said, "Ferdinand. I think Ferdinand is way cool."

"Coming out of you, that's not the high recommendation you think it is, Questiony."

Soos winced. "Ouch."

"C'mon, give me something that sounds a little bit like me."

Dipper said, "Troy Angle?" Mabel laughed.

Bill didn't. "Troy again."

Ford ventured, "Xanthe?"

"Ha. Sure, just call me 'yellow hair,' why not. I like the direction you're thinking—"

Stan—whose barely-suppressed rage at this whole situation had been steadily building back up since Bill called him stupid—snapped, "Why are we looking for a name he'll like? Why does he get any say in this! I say we call him whatever he can pronounce through a mouthful of broken teeth! Because when I'm through with this sonovab—"

Bill blocked his view of Stan's threatening fist by holding up his menu. "But Stanley's got a point, I need a simple name. How many Americans know how to spell Ξανθή?"

"Get this stupid thing out of my—"

Mabel, who'd been mulling over the whole "yellow hair" idea, stood and slammed her hands on the table, interrupting the brewing argument. "GOLDILOCKS!"

Bill erupted into a peal of laughter that made the rest of the table flinch. His handcuffs clattered as he smacked his hands on the table and he leaned toward Mabel. "Yes yes YES! Perfect! Ha!" It was like a light switch had flipped on in Bill, re-energizing him, and suddenly he was brighter than he'd been since before his capture. "Funniest coincidence, I—well, forget it, you wouldn't get it." Eyes crinkling in genuine amusement, Bill said, "But I like you, kid. You're the one with the fun ideas!"

Mabel blinked in surprise, any pleasure at the unexpected compliment dampened by the knowledge that being liked by Bill was never a good thing. "Oh. Yep," she said flatly. "Fun's my thing."

Miffed, Dipper said, "Hey, I made a pun."

"I don't like puns."

Ford said, "If you'd please stop trying to win over my grand-niece with flattery..." but fell silent as Dani came back with drinks.

She passed coffee around, set a chocolate shake down for Mabel, set a second one down for Bill—"On the house"—and winked. "Is it Rumpelstiltskin?"

Bill cracked up again. "No, but give me three hours and a particle accelerator and I could teach you to spin straw into gold!"

"Worth a shot! Okay, is everyone ready to order?"

There was an awkward pause. Soos finally said, "Oh man, we all got to talking and completely forgot to look at the menu. Can you give us like five minutes?"

"Sure. Just wave when you're ready." 

The group steeled themselves to the task of picking a meal, which felt far too mundane for such a bizarre night. Dipper frowned at the paper kids' menu he'd been handed. "Hey, Soos. Can I look at your menu when you're done...?"

Wordlessly, Bill stole Dipper's menu and crayon box and slid over his adult menu.

"...Thanks."

Bill had already dumped out the crayons and started drawing triangles on the menu. "Don't mention it!"

By the time Dani returned, Bill had covered a quarter of the menu in tiny doodles of his own triangular face, reluctantly scratched them out after Soos pointed out he could get arrested for those, and covered half the rest in countless eyes. Soos ordered a burger, Stan ordered bacon and eggs, Ford ordered an omelet, Dipper ordered an omelet too not because Ford did but because it sounded good and maybe he wanted to try one okay that's all, Mabel ordered rainbow sprinkle chocolate pancakes, and Bill ordered a banana octopus pancake and a side of bacon "as floppy as you can make it" over Stan's objections to letting Bill get a side item.

"And raw bacon. Got it." Dani closed her notebook, gave Bill a considering look, and said, "Is it Blondie?"

"Ha! No! But you've been a good sport so I'll give you a hint! It's something in between your first two guesses."

"Huh..." Dani considered that a moment; then noticed Bill trying to pick up his shake with handcuffs on. "Do you... need help with those? I think the attached gas station's got bolt cutters."

Firmly, Ford said, "We've got bolt cutters at home." Bill gave Dani an apologetic shrug.

As soon as Dani was gone again, Ford leaned forward. "All right, Bill. If you're going to be in our house for who-knows-how-long, we need to establish some ground rules."

"Boy, do we ever," Bill said, with the confidence of somebody who assumed he'd have an equal say in deciding what the rules were.

Ford went on without acknowledging Bill. "For now, we can lock you back in the cellar—"

"Cellar's right under the gift shop," Stan pointed out. "I was thinking a storage closet. Just stuff him in there and pile a bunch of furniture in front of the door."

"You know, Stanley, I think that would be safer," Ford said, like he was trying to pretend he liked the idea based on safety rather than based on how satisfying it would be to make Bill as uncomfortable as possible. "Although I'm sure Bill knows he'll just be putting himself in danger if he makes enough noise to catch anyone's attention—so there's rule number one, no sounds. And once I've done some repairs, we can move him to the bunker..."

"No, I don't think so," Bill said. "I don't like that at all."

Coolly, Ford said, "Well, Bill, you're our prisoner, so we can do what we want, you don't get a say in it, and you don't have to like it. In fact, the more you dislike it, the more I think I do like it."

Stan laughed, elbowing Ford. "Took the words right out of my mouth."

Bill said, "But that's just the thing—I do get a say in it! I'm as worried as anyone else about what might happen if this body is killed. But there are fates worse than death. Like boredom, for instance! You know what I'm talking about, right?" He gave Mabel an appealing look.

She doggedly avoided making eye contact, slurping her shake.

Bill shrugged and returned his attention to Ford. "You know and I know you'll only keep me alive until you think of a way to kill me that I can't come back from—and that gives me an advantage. It means I've got nothing to lose. If I'm not living a life that's at least barely tolerable, then your only way to stop me from choosing death on my terms instead of your terms is by sticking me in an artificial coma." His smile stretched wider. "And are you really, really sure I don't know a way to kill myself in my sleep?"

Ford and Stan's scowls deepened the longer Bill spoke. Stan muttered to Ford, "It's not too late to take our chances killing him the old-fashioned way."

Ford shook his head. "What do you consider intolerable conditions."

"Being locked in a little cell with nowhere to stretch my legs, no entertainment, and no company. Abandon me in your bunker? I'll bash my skull in."

Bill declared this with such vehemence that it momentarily gave Ford pause; but he asked, "And if we lock you in the cellar?"

"Then I scream for help until someone calls the cops, and we all get to learn what they find more convincing: 'You've gotta believe me, this lady is secretly Bill Cipher in disguise,' or 'Help me, officer, these lunatics think I'm some kind of demon pyramid!'" Bill rolled his eyes. "I'm not asking for much. Just a little entertainment. Only enough to make this place more appealing than dying! A few rooms I can move freely in, the occasional conversation, a window or two I can look out of..."

"In other words," Ford said, "if we don't want you to do anything drastic, we need to give you a slight chance to escape."

"See, this is why you're the smart one!" Bill graced Ford with a brilliant smile. "And in return, you've bought yourselves time to look for a guaranteed way to finish me off. It'll be like a game: can you figure out how to get rid of me before I find a way out?"

"I stopped playing games with you a long time ago, Cipher."

Bill leaned across the table toward Ford, ignoring that he was at risk of shoving his elbow into Stan's chest and that the kids had started leaning over the table too as if they were prepared to lunge at Bill. "We never stopped playing. You just stopped having fun."

Their negotiations were interrupted by Dani's return. She distributed their meals, then said, "Okay, I've got two guesses. They're dumb, though."

"I'll allow it!"

"Rapunzel or Goldilocks."

"Hey, guess number four! Smart girl! Give her a nice tip, Stanley."

Stan grumbled, "Stop trying to spend my money."

Dani laughed. "You're joking!"

"No, really! Goldilocks!"

"No, no way. You're totally lying."

Studying her face to gauge how much of her skepticism was sincere, Bill amended himself, "Okay, okay, you're right—first name Goldie, last name Locke. Funny though, right?"

"I didn't think I'd get it. Goldilocks the Toga Lady. Ha! You guys enjoy your meals."

Once she was out of hearing range, Bill muttered, "Tabitha, I should have gone with Tabitha. That's a way more believable human name than Goldilocks. I could pull off a Tabitha."

Ford cleared his throat to catch Bill's attention. "All right, Bill, here's your situation. You're trapped within a small geographical radius and surrounded by enemies. You have no money, no identification, and no connections. The last time we saw you, you were pleading for rescue through a book—"

"'Pleading' is so pejorative! I was offering mutually beneficial deals, but you were too busy taping judgmental selfies in my book to—"

"—SO, wherever you came here from, you clearly can't go back there. And if you still have any powers at all, they're obviously dampened or we'd be dead by now. Your options are limited even if you do escape—so before you try, think how much less latitude we'll give you once we catch you."

"Sounds like somebody's about to agree to my terms."

Ford glanced at Stan, to see if he wanted to voice any objections; then Soos, as the current owner of the shack; then the kids, with a silent apology for what this would mean for their summer; and when no one protested, Ford said, "You'll stay in the main shack. You can go anywhere that isn't closed behind a door—that means the kitchen, the living room, the R&D room, and the attic. You don't get to enter any room behind a door without supervision. You don't get access to tools, poisons, or anything you could potentially use as a weapon. No phone, no computer, no borrowing anybody's cellular phones. I suppose there's no harm in letting you use the TV." He glanced around at the family. "Does that all sound agreeable?"

Nobody was thrilled with it, but nobody protested.

Bill said, "Question."

"What."

"How will disputes over what to watch on TV be resolved."

"Everybody in the house gets priority over you."

"You're being petty. We can't even vote on TV selections?"

"Fine, let's vote. Who's in favor of being petty and never letting Bill choose what to watch?"

Everyone but Bill raised a hand.

Bill laughed. "Okay, I walked into that! But I want books."

"Fine. You can have books."

"And writing materials."

"Under supervision only."

"Sheesh, paranoid. Okay. And a radio."

Ford considered that.

"Come on, you don't think I could get into trouble with a radio."

"You can use the record player."

"Nobody uses records anymore. I want a CD player."

"Fine. You can borrow a CD player."

"Fine." Satisfied, Bill picked up the maple syrup bottle and poured way too much on his pancakes.

Mabel cast a quick, envious glance at Bill's banana octopus. It had chocolate chip eyes and was way cuter than she'd expected.

Bill caught her glance, gave her sugary pile of sprinkles and chocolate an equally covetous look, and said, "Want to go half and half?"

She shoved her plate over. "Like you wouldn't believe!"

Dipper hissed, "Mabel," and Mabel flinched, guiltily glancing toward Ford to see if the Head Bill Cipher Expert had any objections to the pancake swap. Ford grimaced, but said nothing. Mabel had already agreed, Ford couldn't think of anything Bill could have done to an untampered-with plate of pancakes, and if Ford objected on principle he'd just end up making himself look like the bad guy—which he had a sneaking suspicion Bill would immediately pounce on.

Meanwhile, Bill certainly hadn't waited to see if Ford approved. He mercilessly sawed his mushy cephalopod in half, the swap was made before anyone could protest Mabel sharing her bounty of sugar with the worst person in the universe, and Bill gleefully added more maple syrup to his new source of sweet sensory overload. He scooped up a forkful of pancakes, stuck it in his eye, then jerked his head back at the pain and stared in confusion. He tried the other eye before he remembered his mouth.

Mabel played with the banana peel tentacles on her half-octopus. At Dipper's grimace, she said, "It's fine, he'll be fine! Octopuses grow back if you cut them in half."

Soos had worked through his burger like popcorn at a movie while he watched Ford and Bill's hostage negotiations. Now that the important decisions had been made and Soos was down to fries, he said, "So, how do we keep Bill out of all the other rooms? Am I gonna have to put locks on every door tomorrow? Because if we just say 'don't go there,' Bill will be like, 'okay,' and then do it anyway, you know?"

"Yeah, Stanford, how are you gonna keep me out of your rooms?" Bill was twirling a piece of bacon around his fork like spaghetti. "I hear I'm pretty sneaky." He stuck the fork in his eye again, flinched, and gave it a disappointed look.

"Well—" Ford glanced around to ensure no one was nearby, leaned closer to Bill, and lowered his voice. "I've actually got a clever idea about that."

Instantly intrigued, Bill leaned in closer. "Oh, do you?"

Like he was inviting Bill in to hear a secret, Ford reached past Stan to put a hand on Bill's shoulder—and said, "Amnesia Limina—"

"You—!" Bill tried to jerk out of Ford's grip, but was blocked by a wall of Soos. Soos caught on and grabbed Bill's wrists before he could shove Ford's hand away.

"—Stupidi Digiti—"

"I hate you."

"—Occultus Locus."

A bright red light flashed between Ford's fingers. Bill's eye twitched. He jerked out of Soos's grip and shrugged off Ford's hand. "When did you learn how to play dirty?"

Dipper had watched with such fascination that he hadn't even noticed a chunk of omelet fall off his fork into his lap. "Whoa, what was that?"

"A curse," Ford said. "Cast it on a door, and no one who interacts with it will know how to open it. Cast it on a person, however—and they'll forget how to open any door or window. We don't have to worry about locking Bill in if he doesn't know how to use a doorknob, do we?"

Bill asked, "What's a doorknob?"

Stan cracked up. Ford grinned at Dipper and gestured at Bill. See?

"Seriously, what's a doorknob? I know every word in the English language, I'd know if 'doorknob' was a word. Is it a wart? A kind of fungus?" Bill sighed irritably. "Where did you come up with that! I thought you forgot that curse years ago."

"I haven't forgotten anything you taught me," Ford said, clearly offended at the suggestion.

"No? Then why'd you waste all that time installing a retinal scanner on your lab door?" As it dawned on Bill that he no longer understood what retinal scanners had to do with the function of doors, he muttered to himself, "Why did he install a retinal scanner."

"I'm not a fool, I knew if I'd cursed the door you would have removed the curse as soon as you possessed me."

Bill laughed. "You idiot! Don't you know the curse can't be lifted by anyone but the person who placed it?"

"It. Can't?" Ford sat there, experiencing the unfamiliar sensation of being the student called on in class who'd read the wrong pages instead of the assignment, even though in his heart he was sure Bill must not have taught him that part of the spell. "What if that person dies?"

"Responsibility for the curse passes to the next of kin! Lucky for you, or this fork would already be in your throat—although I haven't completely ruled that out. Maybe one of your family will be more reasonable about the situation than you."

The rest of the table loudly assured Bill that they would not be more reasonable. Ford gestured toward them. "I don't think so. None of us are foolish enough to fall for your tricks anymore. You aren't going anywhere until we say so."

Bill ignored the rest of the table, gaze fixed on Ford. "Don't be so sure, Stanford Pines. You aren't the first cocky mortal to hold me and you won't be the last! I'll get out of here, and when I do—oh-ho-ho, I'll make you regret every single timeyou ever thought of crossing me."

Ford raised a brow. "I 'won't be the last'?" Stan laughed again, elbowing Ford. Bill cringed, face heating up.

The kids grinned. "Wow, Bill," Dipper said. "Pretty big of you to admit what a loser you are."

Bill rounded furiously on Dipper. "I'll show you a loser—" He lunged across the table toward him.

"Hey!"

"Get over here, you—"

"Everything good so far?" Dani asked.

The table froze. Bill had a fist curled in Dipper's vest, Soos had an arm around Bill's chest, Stan had his hands around Bill's throat, Ford was pointing a knife at Bill's face, and Mabel was prepared to bite Bill's wrist.

Bill slowly let go of Dipper. He gave Dani a thumbs up. "Everything tastes fantastic!"

"Great!" Dani moved on.

The guys slowly let go of Bill and sat back. Mabel gently bit Bill's arm to ensure he knew she meant business.

He didn't even acknowledge her. He'd fixed his glower on Ford again; and when Ford met his look, Bill pursed his lips and spat a thick, milkshaky wad of phlegm onto Ford's omelet.

Stan rounded on Bill so fast he kneed the table. "You little—!"

Ford put a hand on Stan's shoulder to stop him from making a scene. Calmly, he cut around the chunk of soiled omelet, scooped it up, and dropped it in Bill's milkshake.

A crooked smile broke through Bill's scowl. "You know—" he hooked a finger around his milkshake glass and tugged it closer, "this is the most fun I've had in a very long time." He squeezed one eye shut and made direct, defiant eye contact with Ford as he drank the shake.

Mabel and Dipper exchanged a look and cringed in disgust.

####

When they left, in lieu of the extra tip Bill had wanted Stan to give the waitress, he turned over his paper menu and drew a map to an eighty-year-old buried cache of stolen jewelry just a fifteen minute walk from the diner.

He'd finished his milkshake, egg and all.

####

(if you enjoyed, I'd love a comment! Thanks!)

[thecountesstribe]

HOTD SEASON 2X4 SPOILERS AND REACTIONS.

Babies we got our asses kicked today huh??!

I knew it was coming, I knew but that doesn't make it hurt less. As a matter of fact it hurts worse because I loved book Rhaenys and sure they changed and butchered her character somewhat in the show but that was Grandma and I loved her. I need Vhagar and Aemond dead bro. I'm not even playing I'm wishing for their downfall so hard right now. Rhaenys Targaryen was one of the greatest women in Westeros to ever live and stamp that. I'm not ready for the reactions of her family when they find out about her death. Baela, Rhaena, Jace, Corlys, Rhaenyra and the others just recently lost Luke and to lose her so soon after. I'll be sick. Her relationship with Meleys was so special to me. Meleys looking back at her for the first time during the episode and then taking her last look at her for the final time, I was in tears. I'll never get over this hurt. Her face when she realized that she wasn't going back home with Meleys and the fall 💔💔💔. I am not okay, I'm not okay. Rest in peace to them both.

Sunfyre I'm sorry you had that halfwit who barely knows his mother tongue for a rider even though that little nudge you gave him was actually super duper cute. Another one of my babies. Y'all don't think they rewrote the story to kill off Sunfyre because in the trailer for episode 5, Sunfyre wasn't shown.

Aemond I hate you! Living up to that kinslayer moniker. So we intentionally see him burn both his brother (honestly fuckin deserved and about time) and his dragon. Wonder how this is gonna play out, they better not give Aemond Baela's story arc. I'm so fuckin serious. That's it. I wanna fight.

Rhaenyra coming home to a tongue lashing was so satisfying. Jacaerys was fed up y'hear me. He was done. Her telling him about the song of fire and ice just like Vizzy T did for her warmed me a little.

Criston Cole shut the fuck up challenge. It happened years ago, it's time to let that hurt go. They let that old man read him for filth and spit on him just for me.

Alicent being potentially pregnant and having to take medieval plan b or is it medieval abortion medication is so funny to me. I wonder how crybaby Cole would take the news of her potentially getting rid of the child? It's gonna be a mess.

Jacaerys was angry this entire episode and I don't blame him. Why in a room full of adults with battle experience/tactics for the war to come does he and Baela have to act like the adults. On top of that his queen, the one who they're fighting for is just taking unnecessary stupid risks and not thinking like a leader. I'd be irritated asf too. The black council aside from a selected few are just a bunch of bickering childish idiots. Both him and Baela were tired. Baela and him stepping up and leading the council was so good. They literally fed us what could've been had they had a chance to rule. Westeros was robbed. Baela proving she's just as worthy as Jace is just *chefs kiss. One thing I could say about my boy is that he knows Baela could hold her own, she's proved it but he will never ever under any circumstances let anybody feel that they could dismiss her or disrespect her. Him letting that one goof know it's because of her they have actual information on some of the greens army and acknowledging her contributions, yeah they would've been both sat the throne. Ain't nothing like she's just a queen's consort with no power. They would've been co rulers fr. Him comforting her publicly when they brought up Daemon in front of the council no less, like he doesn't play about her. That's the kinda guy you want to be locked in for life with. Rhaenys looking on in the background was a parallel to the first time they held hands during the funeral and she came up to them and she peeped the same thing she peeped then. I know she knew that Baela was in great hands. 😭😭😭 Never beating the best couple in Westeros allegations.

They black council talking about Daemon probably having an orgy LMAOO, he's getting fucked alright. That man has not had one moment of peace since he stepped foot in spooky town and it's what he deserves. Laena being beautiful and haunting his ass, period boo and baby Rhaenyra wearing older Rhaenyra's clothes and the crown that was too big for her tiny head (symbolizing it was/is a burden) and tormenting him. Yeah I'm gonna have that on repeat.

Rhaenys already knowing Adam and Alyn are Corlys children before flying to her death and her informing him and that sweet scene with Alyn, I think she learned her lesson after the whole debacle with Laenor and his boys. That's growth. Wish we could've had more of that development on screen but what can we do.

It was honestly a solid episode. I'm exhausted this was probably a review too long and if you stuck around till the end thanks for reading my thoughts ❤️. Sunfyre, Meleys and Rhaenys didn't deserve that. Sending hugs.

[ifyouseekmyllie]

✰ ⸻ Kelsea Ballerini " Patterns " starters.

Patterns

I've got patterns.

I've got questions, I've got whys

It's in my constellations

I'm coming apart at the seams

Maybe more than I like healing I like the feeling of the feeling that leaves me staring at the ceiling the morning after.

Maybe I'm the one to blame.

Maybe I'm the one to blame for doing the same old same.

Hey, what can I say?

Is this a battle that I'll ever win?

Will I outgrow all these patterns?

Sorry Mom

Sorry mom.

You know that I had sex

You know that I had sex before I bought the white dress.

I know you're not impressed

I know you're not impressed with my lack of sticking to the bible.

Yeah, I got regrets

I turned out alright

We got into a few fights

I know it took a little tough love.

My priorities were out of balance

I wished I was home

Baggage

My heart ain't up in the air

If you want me clear out a drawer, clear out a shelf

I wouldn't want to do this with anybody else

I've got baggage, but I'm moving in

I know the weight and gravity of key chains with same keys.

Home is when you're with me

First Rodeo

I like the feeling runnin' with the wind

Damn, that showdown was embarrassing

It doesn't scare or bother you, at least it seems

Take my heart, but take it slow

This ain't my first rodeo

Love's the wild, wild, west, ain't gotta tell me that.

You make me forget about the last time.

Tell me that it's gonna be alright

Tell me that it's gonna be alright, even though we never know.

When it comes to me and you, I can't not try.

Don't let me go.

Nothing Really Matters

I get existential

I get overwhelmed

Am I caught up in the wrong things?

Am I cool enough?

Nothing really matters, we're a rock in space

Nothing really matters when I'm seeing your face

I should sleep more hours

If it makes you happy why are we so sad?

I was just thinking today

It's kind of all about the love that you get and you give away.

Leave the rest to fate

That's what really matters , anyway

How Much Do You Love Me ?

What am I in for?

If a meteor hit would you get in your car and drive to me ?

If I went insane and didn't know my name would you stay beside me?

If my jokes weren't funny, would you laugh?

How much do you love me?

I gotta ask, how much do you love me?

Do I sound needy and dramatic?

Yeah, I know that it's love but sue me for asking 'how much?'.

Two Things

We said that it's over.

Two things can be true

Two things can be true, I love and hate you

I love and hate you

I'll be your best and your worst day

I'll be your blessing and curse

You're nothing and everything I got to lose

Did you make it home?

Are you feeling alone?

Are we turning into people that we used to know?

I wish it was that easy when it comes to me and you.

We Broke Up

We met, we vibed, we jumped in

God, we were really something

Almost made it all the way, but we didn't and you know what? That's okay

Almost made it all the way but we didn't.

When it's over, it's over.

I could cry 'til I throw up

It's as simple as 'we broke up'.

Tale as old as time, don't gotta wrap my head around it.

We both could point our fingers, we'd both have one pointing back.

WAIT !

I have a nasty habit, leaving before I get left.

I'll stonewall my emotions even when I wanna cry tears as wide as the ocean.

This is just a conversation, baby, what the fuck?

I'm screaming out 'goodbye' out like it means 'I love you'

I'm better on my own.

Wait!

Wait! Don't go!

It's all I've ever known

I'm codependent with my independence through and through.

When I said, ' Just leave then,' I was only fishin'.

My head and heart are at war.

I'm a girl/boy, I'm afraid

Feelings ain't facts.

Feelings ain't facts , just the patterns of my past.

Beg for Your Love

Let me own my shit and not overshadow it

Let me own my shit

I'd follow you to the moon

You know I'm ride-or-die

If you want a chase, I won't run

I ain't gonna beg for your love

I'm trying, are you trying?

If you want 'sorry' on my knees, babe, that can't be me.

God, you can be so mean!

God, you can be so mean when I'm cryin'

Is this just way too tough?

Are you not strong enough?

You're all I want

You're all I want but not like this.

Deep

You could save me, maybe I could save myself.

What's a girl to do lookin' at you ?

If lovin' you is an ocean, then I'm in deep

Cowboys Cry Too

I've talked him down from getting in a fight or two

He's as stubborn as the weeds in the backyard

He hides his heart and hurt 'cause he kinda had to

Cowboys cry too

I grew up wishing I could close off the way my dad did

That man never felt a damn thing he didn't wanna feel

You can't outdrive pain

You can't outdrive pain, someday it's gonna take the wheel

Can't be alone but don't wanna get close to anybody

I don't wanna bare teeth but I don't wanna look weak.

I'm afraid you'll walk away when the tears start running but I hope not

I'm afraid you'll walk away when the tears start running.

I Would, Would You

I wanna be the one that you're callin' when you're drunk

That's what you do when you love someone

That's the choice you choose when you love someone

Can't you see I'm true blue?

Life is short, life is long, but it's better with you here.

If somebody does you wrong, hold my beer

when we're 95 years old divorced and newlyweds, yeah I'd still die for you and haunt you when I'm dead.

I'd still die for you and haunt you when I'm dead

We lost count of all the 'that's what friends are for'.

This Time Last Year

I was learning' all the harder ways

Hittin' the town didn't hit the spot

I gave hell a piece of my mind , it gave me a hit to my pride

I gave hell a piece of my mind

I came out on the other side

I lost a couple good friends

The heartbreak was undeniable

People thinkin' that I've changed

Thank God I've changed

Did You Make It Home ? ( Outro )

Are you safe on the road you chose?

Did you make it home?

Is it where prayers go when you pray 'em?

I'm thinking of you as you go.

[captainmullin]

Captain Mullin ~ Playlist

had the urge to compile a bunch of songs that reminded me of Mullin and their struggles with family and identity soooo. yeah. The Silly

listen [here] (spotify) or [here] (youtube) - list and specific lyrics under the cut!

Icarus - Bastille - Icarus is flying too close to the sun/And Icarus' life, it has only just begun/This is how it feels to take a fall/Icarus is flying towards an early grave Bodies - Bryce Fox - I got bodies in my closet, can't remember all their names/I could tell you it's the last time but you know I'll never change Captain - Derina Harvey Band - It was a stormy sea that made a Captain out of me/It was a rolling rogue and a wild ocean Ship in a Bottle - fin - You set sail alone, there is no crew/No one on the deck who can help you/This is all your own battle to win/This is your ship and you are the captain DEBT COLLECTOR - Jhariah - Here comes the debt collector/Seems you owe him again/Dollars and coins can't cut your cheque/This time around Don't You Dare (Make Me Fall in Love With You) - Kaden MacKay - Don't you dare make me fall in love with you/Don't you dare do something so cliché/Just get out of my daydreams, you're an unwelcome guest Masterpiece Theater I - Marianas Trench - All these practiced poses/I could wreck it if I had to/But I'm the wreck so what would that do? Perfect - Marianas Trench - What you want, what you need has been killing me/Try to be everything that you want me to be/I'll say yes, I'll undress, I've done more for less/And I will change everything till it's perfect again Promiseland - MIKA - Already played my part/I kept my promise, man/Show me the promiseland Firebird (Alt. Version) - Owl City - Tell me why I look back and I wanna cry/Sometimes I feel like we grew up too fast/You and I had the time of our younger lives Black Dirt - Sea Wolf - Black dirt will stain your feet/And when you walk, you'll leave black dirt in the street Visions - Sea Wolf - Everything's the same/But it's all changed/The pieces still make the same picture/Even though they've been rearranged Dear Fellow Traveler - Sea Wolf - Dear fellow traveler under the moon/I think I'm growing weary and I'm hoping you'll come soon/And if I see you in clean new clothes/I hope you hold the mirror up to show me what I chose Mayday! - Sparkbird - The captain lives by the sword/And the captain loves by the sword/When the captain dies by the sword Clean Slated State - The Altogether - Do you need someone, do you need a new me?/'Cause I've got two or three/And they'll only be here until/My clean slated state Welly Boots - The Amazing Devil - And when you scream that it's not fair/It's like I've gone off to the coast/Left you behind just standing there/Pretending not to see your ghost Dig Your Own Grave - The Dear Hunter - Burn what you need of me/I'll give you a fire to light your soul/To be your coal when you need it/Then burn all that's left of me/Then leave me to die/The fire's grown out of control, out of control Blood of the Rose - The Dear Hunter - Dance, dance your decay/All the while unknowing that you're led astray/Sleep, sleep through your woe/While your voice slowly withers and melts away Is There Anybody Here? - The Dear Hunter - I left my soul exposed to frail hands who hold/My fate up in the air/And through their fingers fall the meaning of it all/Down to the floor it goes Old Demons - The Dear Hunter - I won't be satisfied 'til the saccharine faces fade/Making a mockery of mythologies and tried traditions/For I was blind, now I can see/Every obstacle through soliloquy clears its path in front of me The Inheritance - The Dear Hunter - My job is done/You're old enough, it's time to leave/This home and go on your own/I know it's hard, but it's not my problem anymore/Not anymore Leader of the Landslide - The Lumineers - You blamed it all on your kids/We were young, we were innocent/You told me a lie, fuck you for that/Fuck all your pride and fuck all your prayers/And all this time, I waited like a fool, and for the first time/Finally, I can see you as the leader of the landslide

[destinygoldenstar]

☀️🎵Can We Just Talk?🎵☀️ - Total Drama Viewer Reacts to Disventure Camp Season 1 Episode 7 “Spit It Out”

Yeah, I'm back already...

Again, I'm aware of Season 3's finale airing. Didn't watch it obviously.

But I will say, it's kinda difficult to not be sick to your stomach when ALL you hear about something is HATE.

Like, I have not heard a single positive thing about Season 3 and I'm kinda nervous now. (Is it really THAT bad?)

That's why I'm just doing my own thing with the first season and reacting to it in my "Just enjoy it" way. (It's not same as "Turn your brain off" because "Turn your brain off" implies not paying attention)

I will remind everyone, I was NOT recommended this show. The people who replied to me asking if I should watch it said "NO. Don't watch it. It's awful."

So I CHOSE to do this at my own will. I have no one to blame but myself.

I'm enjoying this season so far and I don't want that to be spoiled by people telling me not to.

Cause while criticism is okay, it always is, spreading nothing but hate and spite and nasty threats to anyone involved does a lot more damage than you think. You get a RWBY fandom situation where the only thing going on is harassment and bullying and it drives everyone away and leaves no room for air on takes that aren't majority. I DON'T WANT TO BE A PART OF THAT. ESPECIALLY NOT DEATH THREATS. THAT IS NOT OKAY TOWARDS ANYBODY.

So yeah, hearing any hate towards Disventure Camp about anything, I'm NOT part of it. I am not to blame for anything. I just want to stay in my corner and say what I want to say. (As long as it's not threats, like I said, I can't do that either)

*deep breath*

I just wanted to get this off my chest. NOW THAT THIS IS OUT OF THE WAY,

We're back with Season 1. I beg that there is no double elimination for a THIRD TIME IN A ROW. I'll lose my mind.

Okay, let's get into this, shall we?

Oh we're starting right where we left off last time.

IT'S A TEAM SWAP.

...again...

"My whole team is going to reGRETT voting for me."

"They're going to wish they had never crossed me."

Go off queen!

OH GOD-

What a kind greeting XD

Not the Purple Team becoming the VILLAINS Team!

"I hope that Ellie doesn't have any hard feelings."

Be thankful she isn't Jake, who DEFINATELY would.

OH YAY THEY'RE TOGETHER!!!

We get to see more of them!!

It sucked we couldn't because they were on opposite teams before. BUT NOW WE CAN!

And she immediately goes to Jake to introduce herself.

I have no idea why she'd pick that. But you know what? All for friendships.

"If we lose, we can vote for her instead of one of us."

HOW. IS. DAN. STILL. HERE?!?!

Like, I'm genuinely really tired of him now.

I made a post (that got a lot of hate) about screen time not being problematic for characters so long as they're DOING SOMETHING with that screen time.

Dan is not that. This is my least favorite character in this group. I'm sorry Dan stans.

Everyone else has something to do. All Dan does is push a non-existent alliance and make sexist comments and otherwise has no personality.

GET HIM OUT. I'M SICK OF HIM.

"Gabby is a psychotic backstabber, Jake and Tom are a toxic couple, Miriam is a useless old lady, and Dan is a dumb kid who pretends to know things."

OH GOD, NOT THE SLANDER

She do be right about Jake & Tom though...

"How'd they win so many challenges?"

Because they have numbers.

VILLAIN TEAM

"If you promise to never vote for us, we'll help you."

What if your team loses?

Do you vote for the VOID?!

"Okay, I'll read the votes... WHY ARE THEY ALL SCRIBBLES OF FLOWERS?!?"

"Something about the other two makes me feel at home, that's something I haven't really felt before..."

AW, VILLAIN BONDING. SHE FOUND HER PLACE IN THE WORLD!!

They're still beefing.

I've been eating toxic yaoi two days in a row now. It's junk food, I'll tell you that.

Is Ellie gonna reason with Jake? Awww

"Gabby told me you and Tom are close, but it doesn't look that way anymore."

They had a fight. It happens.

"Are you mad?"

"Yes I am! Tom has been lying to all of us since we got here! He lied to me like everyone else does!"

OH GEEZ THAT LAST PART

I was gonna say "I'm interested in this impulsive and petty anger issues version of Jake"

But that "LIKE EVERYONE ELSE DOES" part. OOF.

Like, my god, how can you blame him though?!

Yeah he wasn't right. But his POV.

"I don't want to bother you with my problems."

Ngl, when I was younger I would vent to strangers all my petty problems and yeah, that's a version of me you should be happy isn't on Tumblr. I grew up, I got in a better environment, and I'm in a better place now.

"It's okay, after last night I know what it's like being betrayed. Everything you say is safe with me."

I like this. I like Ellie being nice to him.

"I like Jake, he's a good guy, even if he's a bit dramatic."

That is MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY

"Honestly, a five minute conversation could probably solve this issue."

Yes. Yes it would. But is it that simple with these two?

"I wanted to thank you..."

Oh?

"For not voting for me yesterday."

Oh...

Yeah no I want you eliminated this episode. You're selfish.

"You'll wish I'd just gone home."

"We already do."

😂

I love Miriam.... oh my god.... 😂

That had no right being as funny as a burn as that was!!

This sounds like a VERY complicated challenge. I'm gonna have to see it in action.

"Is everything okay between us Ellie?"

"What do you think?!"

"What do you think Alec?"

She said exactly that XD

This does NOT look safe!

"Can you help me Jake?"

"I don't think so."

You're STILL salty?

OMG, TALK. IN PERSON WORD ON WORD.

"I took water polo, lacrosse, cheerleading, and even debate."

Debate's not a sport, is it?

Maybe it is and I'm a dumbass.

"What? Debate not a sport? I could debate that."

OKAY THAT WAS HER TALKING DIRECTLY TO ME

"Golden, I can debate on your words!"

This looks like a nightmare to ride

"Things are a bit complicated with Jake, aren't they?"

"That's one way to put it. I know it's my fault but he's exaggerating with his attitude."

Yeah, Tom is right here. But I LOVE that he acknowledges he's at fault for it.

"He's just an immature kid, don't take it personally."

"It's hard not to."

"He'll get over it."

Will he though? Will he?

Grett and Alec are trying to DROWN the child at this point.

"Fiore can't collect water if she's dead!"

Even Alec says it!

Is Grett actually gonna develop from this experience?

"Have you calmed down a bit yet?"

"Yeah, I'm sorry, it's just... I can't forget how he lied to me and how that made me feel."

"And have you thought about how that made him feel?"

Ooh, yes. I love that. Call him out.

"I'm just saying it must have been hard for him too."

Yes. Yes it was.

I get both sides. I do. Tom was trying to do a job and got revealed lying about it and didn't consider how that would hurt his friend (for understandable reasons). And Jake got some flashbacks of bad events and overreacted as a result.

"He only used me to go undercover."

"How do you know?"

"Well, I... Grett said so..."

"Did you hear Tom's side? You should ask him. People are... complex. You can't jump to conclusions."

👏

GLORIOUS. THAT WHOLE THING.

Talk to Tom. Hear his side. Apologize. Make up. Be friends again.

It'll all be fine. I still have my hope.

...and maybe this is why I called their dynamic junk food...

GABBY'S TAKING CHARGE LIKE THE QUEEN SHE IS

Also not Tom wearing TWO masks now! That looks so awkward.

Knew that would happen.

NOT GABBY LAUGHING AT JAKE'S EXPENSE. COME ON.

Welcome to SLAPSTICK THE EPISODE.

NUT SHOT.

Though this time it was a block.

NO WAIT I SWEAR I'VE SEEN THAT ON A SURVIVOR CLIP BEFORE-

Oh that's just straight up sabotage.

HELL YEAH!!!

Fiore told Grett to SLAY yet again.

Really? NO ONE on the team is good with puzzles?!

I say that like I'm good at them, but I'm not either.

Purple Team wins!

It's been HOW LONG since Purple Team won?

"Our team was on a winning streak but suddenly Ellie joins our team and we lose?"

I'm sorry, HOW was this her fault exactly?

OH MY GOD HE'S TALKING TO HIM. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.

"I want to ask you something..."

"Did you really just approach me because of your job?"

Good question.

"You're asking me this now? Where was this question yeaturday?"

"So you're just here for your job!"

"And our friendship, was that just to blend in too?! Did you ever care about me at all?! Was any of it real, HUH?!"

...I mean, TECHNICALLY he DID ask this already?

It was a bad wording of asking it cause he was mad, but he DID ask it.

"Yeah, I'm sorry..."

Aww. At least he's apologizing.

See? He recognizes he made a mistake!

"Jake... I'm going to tell you the truth."

YES PLEASE. OMG THANK YOU.

"...I really like you."

😲

💗

*I'm gripping my heart from that*

UM... OKAY. I DID NOT EXPECT THAT ANSWER. *Giddy again*

"And the days we spent together fishing, gathering supplies, or just talking at camp... it made me rethink some things."

💗

"Yes, I'm here for work, to investigate someone. My agency doesn't allow me to have contact with anyone here after this investigation is over. But... meeting you felt like we quickly had this connection and I thought... am I really willing to risk everything? My whole career? So we could... be something more?"

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH 💗

THIS IS GOING SO MUCH BETTER THAN I THOUGHT IT WOULD. OMG.

That's such good insight on Tom's character too! How long was he a spy? I'm curious. Cause if his missions are all like this, then does that mean Tom has no one? No relationships of any kind? Platonic or romantic?

Cause DAMN that makes too much sense for him to act like this then.

"But the way you've behaved in the last few days made one thing clear to me. I don't really know you. And I can't risk everything for someone who acts so unpredictably."

💔

AAAAAANNNNDDDD it's gone.

I do understand that though. At the end of the day, they knew each other for how many days? And if Tom's career is that serious, then of course he can't.

"Tom, I'm... I'm sorry..."

AW COME ON. HE SAID HE WAS SOWWY.

"But I said I was sowwy! And I meant it!!"

"I was so selfish thinking only for myself! I had no idea!"

This is why I love Jake! He actually ACKNOWLEDGES he's in the wrong and owns up to it!

"That's correct. You had no idea. You never bothered to ask."

And Tom doesn't even coddle him and say "No no, it's okay." That wouldn't be in character, I feel.

"Yes. You screwed up. I hope you know you screwed up. Know what you did was wrong and there's not an excuse for it."

AND HE JUST WALKS AWAY AFTER THAT?!

💔Goddammit...

I LOVED that scene though. Maybe they will be alright after all.

"See? We CAN talk it out! We're not Gwen and Trent!"

"I think the decision is simple. We vote for Ellie."

No. What did she do?!

"She is the only option."

Do you still have blindfolds on?

"As for Ellie, who even is she?"

She's a wannabe college student with a life of bad labor and debt and has passions to be a designer.

"Gabby, trust me, it's for the best."

"FOR YOU IT IS!"

YES! CALL HIM OUT!!

"You always do what's best for you and you don't care what anyone else thinks!"

YUUUUUUSSSSS!!!! DAN SLANDER!!!

Oh god it's Blabby! She's back!

"That boy wants to control you just like Grett did!"

Yes. Yes he does.

"I think I need a hug."

Awwwwwwww 💗

These two are such besties, I love them!

"Uh... I have to go... clean my socks... or something..."

XD

Best excuse ever.

Tom, how did you even become a spy? You suck at your job.

"I'll be back later!"

*Jumps in a bush*

XD

And Miriam just walks away from him XD

"Nah, I'm too old for this shit. I'm out."

"Agent Smith, I wasn't expecting your call at this time."

Smith? His name is Tom Smith?

What happened?

Is the guy he's after planning something worse?

Oh come on Jake. Why Gabby?

Yeah, we know this one.

I thought Gabby and Ellie would convince Jake to vote with them and tie it or something. But no.

WAIT SO THAT MEANS ELLIE IS SCREWED.

"WAIT!!"

"I have an immunity totem and I want to use it."

OH MY GOD THE IDOL. OH MY GOD SHE'S SAVED.

"I want to use this totem to nullify the votes against Ellie!"

YEP. ELLIE'S NOT GOING.

Gabby, SLAY. Successfully reading the room, saving her only ally!

GREAT PLAY.

The subtitles XD

"Any votes on Ellie will not count!"

'ELLIE' *DOESN'T COUNT*

There's three, right?

So this was a successful idol play?

'ELLIE' *DOESN'T COUNT*

'ELLIE' *DOESN'T COUNT*

YEP. SUCCESSFUL IDOL PLAY.

'GABBY'

That's Jake throwing his vote.

'DAN'

OH MY GOD, PLEASE. IS HE GONE?!

PLEASE NOT GABBY.

It's gotta be Dan. He's gotta be gone!

YES! HE'S GONE!!!!

"Why would you waste your totem on Ellie?"

Dude, Ellie was Gabby's ONLY ally in the game. She didn't protect Ellie, then they'd both be screwed.

"I didn't waste it. I saved her cause she treats me like a person."

That too. 💗

WHAT A TRIBAL COUNCIL!!

I like good idol plays, what can I say?

And Dan's finally gone!

I'm sorry, but he was the worst character of the cast.

Lasted too long, no personality, and the only thing he did with all his screen time was talk about an alliance that didn't exist, and be sexist.

And before you say his actions and dialogue weren't sexist: GUYS alliance. Is only seen targeting female characters. Downplays Gabby's problems over his own wants.

He rubbed me off the wrong way and I don't regret bullying him.

At least everyone else on that team was interesting in one way or another, but Dan had nothing.

I GUESS the only thing he did was be the foil to Grett for Gabby's development? As he was someone who also tried to use her but was nicer to her so it left her conflicted? But really, you could've given that role to ANY character. You could've had, idk, Tom do that and not much would change.

Actually, that would add onto the 'Tom is only here for work' plot.

BUT HEY, AT LEAST I DIDN'T JINX ANYBODY WITH THE HEADING THIS TIME! THAT'S A PLUS!

Still, THANK YOU GABBY for slaying this show as usual! You are a GIFT, sweetheart and we're so happy to have you!

GABBY FOR THE WIN!

Anyway, idk if this will get any attention because of the Season 3 finale, but hey, I can continue these if you guys seem interested and entertained by them.

[mikailys]

you said jason and candy's relationship was written while listening to "i can see you", do you have options on the others love interests?

Thank you for the ask anon!

Honestly I spent more time focusing on Jason's but I sure do also have some ideas for the other LIs.

Note: it's Taylor Swift centered because I find her music the perfect medium for storytelling and also cause she's the only artist i've been listening non-stop in the last year so yeah you don't have very much choice.

Also the songs are chosen purely based on the vibes they're giving me off, they might not be 100% accurate lore-wise.

Thomas: I'm Only Me When I'm With You. Whenever I'm listening to this song I immediately think about him and I imagine it as if he's telling Candy how he feels comfortable in her company and how she's the only one who understands him.

« When I'm with anybody else It's so hard to be myself And only you can tell »

On a similar theme, another song I think would fit their relationship is State of Grace.

« You come around and the armor falls Pierce the room like a cannonball Now all we know is don't let go »

Devon: oh our dear boss is a Lover boy. I can't unsee it also I feel London Boy would suit him but idk that's only based on my personal headcanons.

« And there's a dazzling haze, a mysterious way about you dear Have I known you 20 seconds or 20 years? »

But also has a certain reputation to be a New Year's Day boy.

« I can tell that it's gonna be a long road I'll be there if you’re the toast of the town, babe Or if you strike out and you’re crawlin' home »

Amanda: with her it is a bit more difficult since we don't know yet her background but I would say gold rush it's a good fit. I feel like she resembles the gold rush: everybody wants her, everyone would die to feel her touch but Candy imposes herself to do not fall for her cause she's well aware of their abysmal social difference - at least that's what their coworkers say.

« And the coastal town We wandered 'round had never Seen a love as pure as it And then it fades into the gray of my day old tea »

Another one is When Emma Falls In Love, slightly different theme from the previous one but it's a very cutesy and girl-in-love track.

« She won't lose herself in love the way that I did 'Cause she'll call you out, she'll put you in your place When Emma falls in love, I'm learning »

Roy: blame it the fact he's literally Taylor Lautner and Booboo Stewart's lovechild, it's only natural I associate him with the whole album Fearless and its title track.

« I'm tryin' so hard not to get caught up now But you're just so cool Run your hands through your hair Absent mindedly makin' me want you »

I have other songs in my head for him like Jump Then Fall or Hey Stephen but to tell the truth the whole album gives me happy-go-lucky young love vibes, which is perfectly in tune with his personality.

[yolowritter]

In Offense to Lila Rossi

O...kay! Am I the only one who sometimes takes offense to Lila's entire existence? Even if she just stands there, looking at her on screen makes me want to grab the nearest pitchfork! So please, allow me to explain why I despise Lila Rossi in Miraculous Canon, and what my delusions say should happen for Season 6 regarding her character! Call it a stich, I'm still doing it because I can!

To kick things off, it's worth establishing what kind of antagonist Lila is supposed to be in the show. She's introduced in the finale of Season 1, Volpina (yes I know some lists have Origins last, but Collector picks up directly after so it's the finale), and from the moment anybody even mentions her, we get the hint that something is fishy. I'm quite sure it's Alya who first approaches Marinette and tells her about this "new girl" who's showed up at school. Apparently, "she" knows famous musicians, is very talented, etcetera. Marinette raises an eyebrow at this, but there's no real reason to question it yet since the audience has already seen that some of those things are true for her as well (see Jagged Stone). All in all, good little bit of foreshadowing and getting people intersted without going overboard.

Then we actually meet Lila in the library with Adrien. She seems pleasant enough, if a little infatuated, but this is Adrien. He has more fangirls that there are ticks on a goat, so he takes it in stride. All in all, Lila is cheery and excitable, happy to spend time with him. Not the most likable character in history, but also not malicious in any way. This is the expected behavior for some random teenager learning she's classmates with a supermodel. And since we get this whole thing from Marinette's point of view, the audience is encouraged to share her suspicions about Lila. We all know how the rest of the episode goes, and I'll get back to this in a sec.

Point is, when Lila first shows up, she seems interesting. Her lies aren't immediately obvious (or at least like 20% plausible given past events), and she appears to be infatuated with Adrien, just like Marinette. Sure, it looks a bit superficial, but who can blame her? We don't know anything about her yet, and it isn't completely outrageous to think that she might be giving out small lies to make herself more popular since she's the "new kid" and all that.

But after Volpina...we don't see her again until Season 3! Excepting Heroes Day Part 2, where she gets re-akumatized into Volpina for the whole illusion thing, I mean. Lila remains a mystery, and so far has been a nuanced character who we have questions about and know to be a cunning liar. Especially since in Volpina, Lila actually is being smart with her lies to Adrien! She plays up her persona of infatuated fangirl and extracts general information about the book he has, and plays off it by giving minimal details and still attracting his interest. It's only once Adrien has shown her the page about the fox heroine that Lila makes up a story about having the Miraculous in her family, and then she immediately goes off to cover her back by buying a fake Fox Miraculous from a "Gabriel" store.

Side note: This is the one and only time we see this happen, and I still have questions as to why Gabriel Agreste is selling jewerly that only someone with the Guardian's Grimoire would know how to design. Dead giveaway, but that's a general plothole in the show, and irrelevant to Lila.

The thing is, I love Lila in Volpina! She actually does manipulate Adrien pretty well, makes sure to subtly get all the information she needs, and then plays her part perfectly, to the point where he's on her side when Ladybug swings by to berate her for lying about having a Miraculous. Granted, Marinette's intense reaction doesn't do her any favors, but nonetheless Lila is actually good at lying in this episode! Now prepare to throw this out the window with Chameleon! Oh, Chameleon! What is even left to say about this episode that the fandom didn't tear to shreds back when it first aired? Welp, doesn't matter! I'm grabbing Hawkmoth's cane and beating the dead horse one last time, just because Lila pissed me off this badly when I re-watched it recently!

I have genuinely researched the lies that Lila spouts out in this episode, and I'm honestly baffled as to why the writing team even put them there? I'd think it takes more effort to think of something this ridiculous rather than a semi-believable lie? Let's break the two most ridiculous ones down real quick. Getting tinitus from being behind a plane engine while it was taking off. Now, I'm assuming Lila also lost a few braincells in this episode, because while while yes, if that were to happen one would have severe hearing damage...we're talking about going completely deaf. Not to mention that you'd have to ignore countless airport security measures to even get there, and that in some countries, it's very much illegal to be on the runway when a plane is taking off. So Lila would have gone completely deaf, forever, not to mention sustained actual injury from being right behind a plane as it's taking off. Do you see why this is so ridiculously unbelievable? And okay, for the sake of argument let's say that people do believe her. Miss Bustier has zero reaction to this information, which would have presumably caused a responsible adult to panic at the idea of a child sustaining such an injury. Clearly, this episode is designed to devour braincells from everyone present.

Then we move onto the moment that still infuriates me, the Napkin Incident™. I'm not going to go into too much detail because we all know the gist. Lila catches a napkin thrown by Marinette with her supposedly "sprained" wrist, and explains the reason she "hurt herself" was to protect Max's eyes from being gouged out! By a napkin, while he's wearing glasses! In addition, Lila blatantly lies about being best friends with Ladybug and having sustained other minor injuries, and all of this makes me honestly upset because I see what they were going for! I can see the vision here!

Lila lying about being best friends with Ladybug to gain Alya's interest! Lila making herself the victim and exploiting Marinette's eagerness to expose her to gather support from her classmates and take away her friends! She even says that's what she plans to do at the end of the episode! But...this never goes anywhere. Lila is almost entirely absent from the remainder of the season, and just...doesn't follow up on this? Instead all we get is Lila getting outrageous lies that require every other character in the room to lose the entirety of their IQ to even be plausible in the slightest. And the plot wants to pretend as if she's a master manipulator when all she does is tell extremely obvious lies that can be very easily disproven!

Even when she pretends Marinette pushed her down the stairs, nobody reacts in the way they should! Bustier and Damocles should have called in the school nurse, or a doctor to check her over, especially since Lila claimed to be in severe pain. It's completely unreasonable for adults to behave they way these two do whenever Lila is involved in anything. My point is that for Lila to be what the show says she is, she needs plot armor. People believe her just because they have to. It's demanded by the script. And it's infuriating!

It would be another thing entirely if Lila slowly approached each and every classmate and systematically inserted herself in situations as the "friend", or used small lies to slowly degrade Marinette's connections with others. She could ensnare Alya with little lies about Ladybug, and then act concerned and worried when Marinette denied everything without any proof (like we already see her do multiple times). And yes, obviously they can't devote another dozen episodes to focus solely on this, but the fact that we never see Lila even try to do it very much undermines her character. The narrative presents her as a master manipulator who pulls the strings from the shadows, and addmittedly she has some good moments like when she frames Marinette for stealing her necklace...but that can easily be disproven by checking security cameras, or by Adrien speaking up. Remember, he was there in Volpina when the necklace was proved a fake, and Lila is using the same lie here.

Not to mention that in each and every case where Lila lies, even in Season 5, the believability of that lie is solely dependant on the sheer incompetence of every (allegedly) responsible adult around her, and the fact that Marinette's classmates are contractually obligated by the script to believe her without a second thought. The problem here is that Lila isn't good at lying. What she says is either outrageous enough to warrant genuine concern if believed (ex: Marinette pushing her down the stairs. No adult would have made this girl walk back up that staircase without first asking if she was hurt and calling in a medical professional) or so plain stupid that it has everyone wondering where their lost braincells may have slipped off to. To give credit where it's due, Lila's manipulation of Chloe in Season 5 is actually pretty great and consistent with what we've been told she's supposed to be.

But...considering that by this point, (regarding Marinette's friends now) Alya knows her best friend is Ladybug, hates Lila, and was clearly right about the girl being a walking red flag...why does it take a DIY bathroom and a literal 300 IQ scheme to prove that Lila has been lying about things? Like, Alya, Adrien and presumably Nino (if anybody bothered to clue him in) should know that she's full of crap, and suspect her. Don't get me wrong, I love Marinette's whole fake bathroom plan. Genuinely made me marvel at how smart she is. But it also shows that the script still treats Lila as an Avengers-level threat...even if at this point in the story, her lies are just bad. We know from Chameleon she can't even keep her own stories straight (see Lila forgetting which ear her tinnitus was on), and this could have been an amazing detail the gang utilized to start convincing the others that she is lying.

The general problem with Lila's canon character is that she's underutilized, barely appears outside of when she absolutely needs to, and fundementally fails to be what she's been writen as, requiring her Villain Plot Armor™ to kick in and steal everyone's braincells away. I absolutely love the whole "Lila is a fox" characterization, because Volpina was literal genius! The metaphors and symbolism of Lila being cunning and always scheming? Amazing! But...what we actually get to see of her in action? Really, really bad. Also, I am not touching her three mothers with a ten foot pole, not until we get a canon explanation. Personally I ascribe to the Scarlet Lady AU version, but we'll see. Even the more obviously ridiculous things, like Lila having a whole secret lair in the Parisian Catacombs...I'd buy it. If there's IRL raves happening down there, then she could totally have a secret villain lair tucked away behind a few crypts or something.

What I wish we had gotten from Lila is honestly not a lot. Instead of just walking up to people and lying her ass off, I'd prefer to see her be more subtle about it. For Nooroo's sake, just get this girl to actually be cunning like all the fox metaphors want you to think! It isn't that hard to write a scene where she plays the "concerned friend" as Cerise to plant seeds of discord. Buggachat did it very well in "Open my Eyes", and it made me absolutely hate Cerise! And that's a good thing! Lila/Cerise/Iris/Whatever-other-identity-she-has-in-her-closet is meant to be hated by the audience! She literally is a "love to hate" character! And in Open My Eyes, Cerise actually did act as the concerned friend, she was subtle, she didn't always lie but sometimes twisted the truth just a little bit, enough to get the doubts to creep inside someone's head. I got so frustrated because I wanted Adrien to figure her out, but couldn't find a logical way for him to do so in the first place! Do you guys get what I'm talking about yet?

Subtle but convincing. Small and unnoticable until it's too late. That's how Lila should be, because it utilizes the most plot threads made by her lies. I can go on and on with specific examples, but I want to actually post this someday so I shall refrain. In conclusion, there are only two types of Lila. "I'm going to burn your house down and smile while doing it, then find a puppy and kick it into a sewer before emotionally scarring someone to the point of needing life-long therapy" Lila.

And the "cunning, sneaky and subtly manipulative fox who drives people insane slowly but surely as she makes them have an existential crisis" Lila.

I vehemently refuse to accept her canon version, and fear for Season 6 if she doesn't change into one of the above, or at the very least stops being so incredibly in-your-face about it. It's infuriating (in a good way) when the characters don't know, but if the lie is as obvious as "How was my weekend? Oh, nothing much! I just went skydiving on Venus, that's all really!" ...do I even need to elaborate? Because that's what Lila sounds like 96% of the time!

Alas, I digress. Feel free to give your opinion about our resident lying wretch, I need to go take a break before her incompetence drives me insane. I'll see you all soon...but until then, Stay Miraculous everyone!

[targaryenofrph]

Patterns by Kelsea Ballerini Sentence Starters

Change the pronouns and tense as needed for your verses.

I've got patterns

I'm coming apart at the seams

I like the feeling of the feeling that leaves me staring at the ceiling the morning after

Maybe I'm the one to blame for doing the same old same

It's so much deeper than under my skin

Is this a battle that I'll ever win?

When does it start, and when does it end?

Will I outgrow all these patterns?

Will I unknow all these patterns?

You just made the eggs and turned your head

I know you're not impressed with my lack of sticking to the Bible

Maybe we got into a few fights

So I know it took a little tough love to become the woman that you're proud of

My priorities were out of balance

You told me to go but wished I was home

I wouldn't wanna do it with anybody else

Everything that's heavy, I check it at the door, kind of feel like I don't need it anymore

I got some bones of old skeletons from the old house at the dead end

I got baggage, but I'm moving in

We both slept on a mattress with "I love you" people

So I know the weight and gravity of key chains with same keys

if you want that "Welcome" mat, then roll it out with me

Cause home is when you're with me

I like the feeling runnin' with the wind

That's why I went and did what I did

He and I both had our guns to sling, damn, that showdown was embarrassing

I'm still here brushing off a couple things

It doesn't scare or bother you

Never knew I'd have a round two

Take my heart, but take it slow, 'cause this ain't my first rodeo

Love's the wild, wild west, ain't gotta tell me that

Tell me that it's gonna be alright even though we never know if we're gonna make it out alive

When it comes to me and you, I can't not try

I get existential

I get overwhelmed

Got two hundred seventy-something things to reply to

You put on the boots I like for dinner on Friday night

You say they're uncomfortable but you wear 'em anyway

If I went insane and didn't know my name would you stay beside of me, reminding me?

If I gambled away my money, would you back away?

If my jokes weren't funny, would you laugh?

How much do you love me?

Do I sound needy and dramatic?

We said that it was over, what'd you send 'em for?

Two things can be true

I'll love and hate you

I'll be your best and your worst day

I'll be your blessing and curse

Sometimes I'll cut and ghost but sometimes I'll get too close

You're nothing and everything I got to lose

I wish it was that easy when it comes to me and you

No use in diggin' up bones from the grave

When it's over, it's over

I could take a deep dive in the details

I could hide, I could cry 'til I throw up

It's as simple as "We broke up"

I could call my friends and bitch about it

Tale as old as time, I don't gotta wrap my head around it

Another boy driving off mad in a black truck

I have a nasty habit, leaving before I get left

You'll think my light's on yellow when I'm keeping you on "Read"

Stonewall my emotions even when I wanna cry tears as wide as the ocean

One fight, too many 3 A.M.s, I guess we're broken up

You're like, "This is just a conversation, baby, what the fuck?"

Now I'm screaming, "Goodbye," out like it means "I love you"

I'm better on my own

It's all I've ever known

Wait! Don't go!

I'm codependent with my independence through and through

How stupid of me to think you wouldn't listen

so once again, my head and heart are at war

Can I take it back now? Can we make it last?

Feelings ain't the facts, just the patterns of my past

I'd follow you to the moon

You know I'm ride-or-die for you

But if you want a chase, I won't run

I ain't gonna beg for your love

I wanna go the distance, babe

I can't do it if I betray all the way before you work I've done

If you want "Sorry" on my knees, that can't be me

Is this just way too tough?

Are you not strong enough?

God, you're all I want but not like this

It's almost like I don't care if I even know how to swim

You could save me, maybe I could save myself

If lovin' you is an ocean, then I'm in deep

I grew up wishing I could close off the way my dad did

That man never felt a damn thing he didn't wanna feel

I've burned too many miles trying to ride out all the sadness

You can't outdrive pain, someday it's gonna take the wheel

Can't be alone but don't wanna get close to anybody

Don't wanna bare teeth but don't wanna look weak, it's a tough spot

But I'm afraid you'll walk away when the tears start running

I wanna be the one that you're callin' when you're drunk

When you're dropping every ball, I'll be there to pick 'em up

'Cause that's just what you do when you love someone

That's the choice you choose, when you love someone

No conditions, I'd follow you to the moon, no suit

I would, would you?

If somebody does you wrong, baby, hold my beer

Yeah, I'd still die for you then haunt you when I'm dead

I'll think about these nights when we lost count of all the "That's what friends are for"

I gave hell a piece of my mind

It gave me a hit to my pride

But I came out on the other side

This time, last year, the heartbreak was undeniable

Day by day, I became unrecognizable

Makin' my rounds, shootin' my shot

Standin' my ground, pissin' people off

People thinkin' that I've changed used to be my biggest fear

It's gonna be okay

You'll live to see the day when you're gonna say look at me now

Are you safe on the road you chose?

Did you make it home?

[uselesslexbian]

the lightning thief by rick riordan sentence starters

am i a troubled kid? yeah, you could say that.

i'm going to kill her.

you're already on probation. you know who'll get blamed if anything happens.

it's okay. thanks for trying.

you've been giving us problems.

did you really think you would get away with it?

let him enjoy his ignorance while he still can.

i can't fail in my duties again. you know what that would mean.

why would i need you?

what are you not telling me?

tell me they're not looking at you. they are, aren't they?

i don't want this to be like the last time.

does that mean somebody is going to die?

i hope you lose.

because you don't want me around?

you've been out for two days. how much do you remember?

you drool when you sleep.

can you imagine that for a moment, never dying?

but i don't believe in gods.

not lethal. usually.

i can't believe i thought you were the one.

monsters don't die. they can be killed. but they don't die.

oh, thanks. that clears it up.

you talk in your sleep.

i'm thinking that i want you on my team for capture the flag.

why would anybody want to summon a monster?

i don't belong here.

no maiming.

where the heck did you learn to fight like that?

you're saying i'm being used.

who else would be stupid enough to volunteer for a quest like this?

a lot of hopes are riding on you.

kill some monsters for me, okay?

you want a magic item?

remind me again - why do you hate me so much?

i don't hate you.

i said if you're lucky. you're obviously not.

i can't just leave you.

you have offended the gods. you shall die.

what did you want me to do? let you get killed?

you didn't need to protect me. i would've been fine.

the real world is where the monsters are. that's where you learn whether you're any good or not.

you're pretty good with that knife.

are you crazy? this place is weird.

what's that hissing noise?

i take vitamins. for my ears.

that's admirable. but please, relax.

you would be better off as a statue. less pain.

oh, yuck. mega yuck.

forget it. you're impossible.

you're insufferable.

they're not going to like that. they'll think you're impertinent.

i am impertinent.

they seemed plenty aggressive to me.

how about i take first watch? you get some sleep.

how long was i asleep?

what would you do if it was your dad?

that's easy. i'd let him to rot.

can't we work together a little?

they don't make heroes like they used to.

we can't leave you alone for five minutes! what happened?

it's okay. i don't mind a little attitude.

you can't do that. you can't just threaten people with a knife.

don't you carry a weapon? you should. dangerous world out there.

even strength has to bow to wisdom sometimes.

if he brings his girlfriend here for a date, i'd hate to see what she looks like.

you don't want to insult her looks.

me, go with you? how embarrassing is that? what if somebody saw me?

who's going to see you?

you didn't get yourself killed.

you knew it was a trap.

her death was my fault.

please. i'm not into self-inflicted pain.

i don't know what they'll do. i just know i'll fight next to you.

because you're my friend.

no gift comes without a price.

be faster next time.

the plan. yeah, i love the plan.

no. i'm dead.

you're not dead. i should have known.

i'd wish you luck, but there isn't any down here.

it amuses me not to strike you dead yet.

there can't be a war among the gods. it would be... really bad.

you keep saying "after what you've done." what exactly have i done?

you heroes are always the same. your pride makes you foolish.

you were supposed to die.

i take orders from no one.

i don't have dreams.

he is proud and impulsive. it runs in the family.

obedience does not come naturally to you, does it?

a hero's fate is never happy. it is never anything but tragic.

whatever else you do, know that you are mine.

you can't do this for me. you can't solve my problems.

if my life is going to mean anything, i have to live it myself.

you miss being on a quest?

where's the glory in repeating what others have done?

all the gods know how to do is replay their past.

when i came back, all i got was pity.

the gods let her die.

i've been used? look at yourself.

you must not rush out for vengeance.

keep your eyes open.

i'll be back next summer.

i'll survive until then.

[gaintsnowflake]

𝐆𝐄𝐎𝐑𝐆𝐄 𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐎𝐎𝐌

PAIRING - George Karim x Ex!gn!Reader

ONESHOT - in which george has a breakdown in the bathroom

SONG - michael in the bathroom by george salazar

TRIGGERS - drinking, mental breakdown, being left

A/N - please mind any typos or grammar mistakes, it is proof-read only by me so I won’t be able to catch everything

WORD COUNT - 1k

masterlist

THE WORLD is spinning. 

I knew it was a bad idea to come here, a even worse one to drink when I had seen them, hoping to just make the pain go away. I should have never listened to Lockwood. I should have stayed home. I could be home, curled up reading a book. I could be doing research about another case. I could be fighting a fucking ghost, that sounds better than being here right now.

I am crying in the bathroom at the biggest party of the fall. I could just sit right here and disappear, nobody'd even notice at all. Not Lockwood, not Lucy. Hell if I didn't know any better I would say they are snogging in a random corridor. I am a nobody to anybody here. 

Outside the door, people of high status fill the large rooms. Those who are not high status are the drunken agents who are partying like there is no tomorrow, probably because they may not have a tomorrow. But here is I am. I'm the creeper in the bathroom, because my buddies left me alone.

But I would rather fake pee than stand awkwardly staring at them from across the way. But it can't help but bring back the memories of the last party I had gone too. When everything felt fine, cause I was half of a pair. Though no fault of mine, there is no other half there. Because they left us. They left me. Not the other way around.

They left me, so now I am just, George in the bathroom. I am George in the bathroom at a party. God I forget how long it's been. And no one can come in. 

I will just sit here and cry, waiting for Lucy and Lockwood to come in get me or I'll wait it out 'til it's time to leave. This would leave me with hours of time to do nothing but sit, pout, and possibly pick at grout as I softly grieve. 

All because I'm just George, who you don't know. George whose flying solo. I am just George in the bathroom by himself. All by myself. I am hiding because their out their. I'm ignoring all our history. Trying to forget all the pain they brought me. I hope my memories get erased, maybe get replaced, with a newer cooler version of me. Because they deserve that. They deserve their second half, even if it isn't me. 

But now I hear a drunk girl, singing along to Whitney through  the door. "I wanna dance with somebody!" Her words are slurred, but it only bring backs memories of the good old days. But my feelings sink, cause it making me think, now there is no one to make fun of drunk girls with anymore. 

I am left alone, nobody to call my home. No one to bring me tea, when I am up late at night. No one to watch over me. I am just me.

Now it's just George in the bathroom, George in the bathroom at a party. Could I get any less pathetic, as I sit and choke on the sobs. The alcohol in my system only making my emotions worse. I half regret the beers, cause its making the tears flow harder and faster. All because I am just George in the bathroom, George in the bathroom at a party.

I can try and hide, choke back the tears, wait as long as I need, 'till my face is dry. My eyes are red from, how do I even try to cover that?I could wait until they become less flush, or maybe I'll just blame it on weed. Or something in my eye.

How would anyone know? I'm just George who no who they don't know. George flying solo. George in the bathroom by himself. The last person they think of when they think of cool. I am just an oddball who no one likes. 

As I continue to clean off my face, trying to hide the fact I am crying, hiding in the bathroom by myself. Just waiting it out, till I hear a knock. Maybe I'll be free. Then I hear a few more, knock, knock, knock. It is getting more aggressive as I prepare to leave. They are gonna start to shout soon, hell yeah, I'll be out soon. I won't be on my own, it sucks they left me here, all alone, here in this battle zone. 

The noises get louder as they pound harder. I can feel their anger, the pressure blowing up. I knew it was a mistake showing up. If I just splash, some water on my face, everything will be just okay. 

So I throw some water on my face, and now I am in a better place. But as I go to open up the door, I can't hear knocking anymore.

I missed my chance, I missed my escape. I can't help but yearn, for a different time. One where I can get out of here, make my presents clear, have the courage to stand for what's right. But then I look in the mirror, and it becomes much clearer. There is no denying, I'm just George in the bathroom at a party, is there a sadder sight than... George in the bathroom at a party. 

This is a heinous night, I wish I just stayed home instead. Maybe just lay in bed. Or I wished I offed myself in bed, wish I was never born. Then I wouldn't have to do this all again. No one would care, no one would notice. 

I am just George who's a loner, so he must be a stoner. I ride a PT cruiser, god I am such a loser. 

But what's worse is when I hear the creek of the door. The lock is gone. I look over my shoulder, to see their face. The memories coming back to me. This isn't worth the pain, as they look at me, heartbreak in their eyes. I am now who they think that they know. 

I am not the same old boy, so much has changed. They don't know me anymore, and that is their fault.

"Georgie?" Their voice is still the same, sending my heart fluttering at the name. 

But all they know about me is my name.

"AWESOME PARTY, I'M SO GLAD I CAME."

[miyuhpapayuh]

21. Silk.

"I'm so glad you're here. I haven't seen you, since... Gloria left us." The tears start to fall from both of their eyes.

"I... I'm sorry, I packed up and left. I just couldn't stay here." Moving their hands from her face, she lets them swing at their sides.

"I don't blame you, baby doll. We all needed our time— hell, we still need it. I'm just glad that you came to see us. To see me. I missed you terribly."

"I missed you, too. We've got lots to talk about."

"Yes, we do. Rina, dear, will you let us catch up, please?"

"Of course. I'll let you know when lunch is ready." She heads out and closes the door behind herself.

Stevie sits down in the red recliner that sits next to his, sliding her boots off and pulling out the footrest.

"How was your flight?"

"I hate planes and my nerves were shot, but I made it." She sighs. He nods, fiddling with his wedding band.

"Planes are a death machine, I believe. Every time Gloria and I would travel, she made sure to say that on every plane we'd ever gotten on."

"She loved to travel, man. I remember she took me to Puerto Rico with her, one summer. I ate the best food and got the best tan of my life!," she laughs.

"Yeah?, is that when you learned Spanish?" She nods, twiddling her thumbs.

"Mhm. She made sure to drill it in me. I couldn't go to the pool, until I could have a full conversation with her in Spanish."

"You wanna know something?"

"Always."

"I've sat in front of this window for the last three years and hadn't spoken a word to anyone, about anything. I just watched the wind rustle through those red leaves and cry. Gloria knows I hate crying and she left me, anyway." He looks away from her.

"What made you start talking, again?"

"You."

"Me?," her tone full of curiosity. "Why me?"

"I thought about you and how broken up you were. If that fiery old woman meant anything to anyone, it was you. Oh, she loved you with all her heart." He pats her leg. "I just kept seeing your face in my head and I wanted to see you. I don't even think, I realized that you had left. I was numb to everything. But, I'd gotten tired of feeling that way— it was hard, losing her. She'd been my sweetheart for fifty years and she left me."

"I never thought about how hard this was on you. I was being super selfish and I'm sorry."

It stung, watching him tear up over the only woman he'd ever loved.

"No, dear... it's okay,"

"It's not, grandpa. I should've checked on you. You've been without your heart for three years."

The look in her eyes is one he knows, all too well.

"You're in love, aren't you?" She wipes her tears away and pulls her knees up to her chest.

"How'd you know?"

"You've got that look. What's his name?"

"Roderick." He smiles.

"How long has it been?"

"It'll be a year in May."

"Oh, it's still fresh!"

"In the measure of time, yes. But, I feel like I've known him my whole life."

"She's the most amazing girl I've ever met." Aunt Rina, Jade and Stevie's mom, Victoria, who showed up an hour ago with her husband, Gene, swoon as Rod talks about Stevie.

"Where did she find you? Are there more where you came from?" Jade raises an eyebrow in question.

"Unfortunately, I'm one of a kind, and if anybody found anybody, it was me that found her."

"Hm. La perra afortunada." Jade says, gets swatted with the hand towel right after.

"Ouch, ma!"

"Watch your language, in this house. Lo juro, ustedes pierden la cabeza a veces. ¡Jesús!"

"I was just playing!"

"Well, knock it off! Act like the good Lord gave you some sense." Victoria cuts her eyes at her niece, before looking back to Rod. "You wanna tell them the story of how you two met?"

"I'm always up for that.," he chuckles. "Stevie would kill me, if she knew I was telling it, which makes it even funnier. Last year, I was coming from the cafe and I basically wiped her out—" Mateo cackles, loudly. "It's as funny as it sounds, for real. I got off a few jokes about her being as small as she is and she wasn't feelin' it— she laughed, but she wasn't feelin' it— but, I asked for her number and the rest is history, my friends."

"Wow, you got her mean ass to be nice to you? That's wild." Derrick shakes his head. "She used to beat us up."

"Oh, she definitely gave me a run for my money, in the beginning, but mama ain't raise no quitter. I'm built for it."

"Are you?" Gene asks, amusement laced in his tone.

Rod laughs, shaking his head. "I am!"

"You're not," Stevie says, as she steps into the living room with her grandpa. Rod scans her face, frowning at her puffy, red eyes.

"Hey ma, hey dad." She heads over to her parents, kissing their cheeks.

"Hey, honey. You look beautiful."

"That's your twin, I swear." Her grandpa adds.

"They're both gorgeous, so it works." Gene replies.

"Abuelo, I want you to meet my boyfriend, Roderick."

He stands up, standing almost eye-to-eye with the older man, extending his hand.

"It's a pleasure to finally meet you, sir."

"Likewise, son. I've heard a lot about you. You can call me Jorge." Giving his hand a firm shake, he gives him a warm smile.

"Good things, I hope."

"Very good things, son. You've got yourself a dime."

"I'm forever lucky to have found her," he glances at her, watching her blush, profusely.

༺═───────────────────────────────────────═༻

After lunch, the photo albums are spread out and everybody's currently ripping into Stevie about how chubby she was.

"Look at those cheeks!" Jade points to a picture of Stevie. She had to be around two or three years old, her curls were tossed all over her head and she was sitting on the lap of her favorite person, her grandma.

"Ugh, I was ugly." She laughs, leaning back into Rod.

"The lies. You were the cutest baby I've ever seen." He rubs her thigh and presses his face against her arm as she sits on his lap.

"Oh, you're a slick one." Aunt Rina points her finger at him, laughing to herself. Stevie playfully rolls her eyes.

"I'm innocent." He winks.

"Mhm. I'm keeping my eye on you." She playfully threatens.

"Ooh, look! I haven't seen these pictures in years!" Jade flips the page and points to the black and white pictures of her grandparents, looking like something straight out of a movie.

"Aw, y'all were sharp! When was this?" Stevie asks her abuelo.

"This was after church, one day. Gloria wanted ice cream really badly, I could never say no to her, so I drove fifteen miles to the nearest parlor and got her, her favorite ice cream. Anybody know what it is?”

"Pistachio!" They all say in unison, laughing.

"Fifteen miles?! That's some love." Derrick shakes his head. "We'd have to go in on gas money, together."

"Oh, brother." Jade says.

"That's a little triflin', don't you think?" Rod asks.

"How?"

"It's fifteen miles. That's not much."

"You'd drive that far for Stevie?" Derrick questions.

Rod laughs. "I'd drive around the world for her."

"You'd never ask for gas money?" Mateo asks.

"Nope. Men don't worry ‘bout things like that. If she offered, it'd be a different story, but I'd never ask and never stress over it."

"You've got you a good one." Uncle Don nods in Stevie's direction.

"I know, right." She cheeses.

The front door opens and closes. "Dad!," a female voice calls out.

"In the kitchen!," he yells back.

"I'm so sorry, I'm late. The traffic out there is terrible—" rounding the corner, Stevie's aunt Isabela and cousin Adrienne walk into the spacious kitchen.

"Stevie, hi!" Her aunt rounds the table and leans down for a hug. "Ugh!, you get prettier, every time I see you."

"Cut it out! How've you been?"

"I've been good— not as good as you, I see." She darts her eyes towards Rod, who's growing used to being the center of attention.

"This is my boyfriend, Rod. Rod, this is my aunt, Isabela." They shake each other's hand.

"It's nice to meet you, dear."

"Nice to meet you, too."

"Adrienne, are you gonna come and speak?"

"She doesn't have to." Stevie says, abruptly. "It's totally fine."

"Hey, everybody....Hey, Stevie." Adrienne replies, sarcastically, moving the phone away from her ear. "So nice of you to join your family, again."

Stevie blinks. Rod wraps an arm around her waist, sensing the hostility in the air. Gene takes a mental note, chuckling to himself.

"My boy," he mumbles to himself.

"Usually, I'd stoop to your pathetic level, but I'm not gonna do it."

"And, why is that?" Adrienne folds her arms across her busty chest.

"Because, you're simply not worth it. Go take your phone call and stop talking to me."

Adrienne stomps away into the living room, leaving Stevie to roll her eyes.

"You two have never gotten along," her grandpa points out. "Why is that?"

"She's rude. It could've been cool, had she not said what she said. That wasn't necessary."

"No, it wasn't. I'm sorry." Isabella apologizes.

"Aren't you tired of apologizing for her behavior? She's too old for that."

Sighing, Stevie excuses herself, heading down the hall to the bathroom.

"I'm gonna kill somebody, before I leave." Washing her hands, she opens the door and comes face to face with Adrienne.

"So... you finally get a man and decide to show your face, huh?" The malice in her voice is as thick as the blood pumping through Stevie's veins.

Blowing out a breath, Stevie walks past her, back down the hallway. Adrienne grabs her wrist and pulls her back. "I'm talking to you."

"Don't touch me." She grits, roughly smacking her hand away.

"What's your problem, bitch?" Stevie's eyes widen at the word that ever so, carelessly flies out of her mouth.

"Excuse me?," Rod comes around the corner and zeroes in on Stevie cracking her knuckles, quickly getting between the two.

"Move, Rod. She wanna call me out of my name! I swear, I'll beat your ass in this house. It's never an issue."

"You talk a lot for someone who hasn't swung yet."

Stevie pushes against her brick wall of a boyfriend, trying to get past him.

"Stevie, what's going on?" Her mom and aunt Isabela come into the hall and throw puzzled glances at each other.

"Adrienne's lost her mind. Calling me a bitch and making comments, like she knows me."

"I do know you! You're a flake! You show up, when it's convenient for you, like now. How long has it been since you've been down here?"

"Convenient for me?," taking all her strength, she moves Rod aside. "I'm not here for me, Adrienne. I'm not here for you. I'm here for my grandpa. I'm here to properly mourn my grandma. I'm here to see my family. I'm not here to get into these stupid ass arguments with you— got me showin' out in here. It's always some bullshit with you, why? Why do you always have to be up my ass? Weren't you the one that went ghost on everybody, after she died? That was you, right?" The hot tears that stream down her face catch her off guard.

"Stevie.," her mom touches her shoulder, making her flinch and rush back into the bathroom, closing and locking the door behind her.

Rod immediately heads towards the door, softly knocking on the old fashioned, wooden door. "Stevie.."

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Victoria asks Adrienne, whose smug grin hasn't faltered.

"Getting her to see that she's the issue. She dipped on us, right? This was hard on everybody and she left."

"Oh, please!," Jade comes in, "you don't remember how you showed your ass, after the funeral? How you left and nobody could find your stupid ass for a week?!"

"Who was talking to you?"

"Who cares? Why won't you take accountability for your own actions? You think abuelo wants to hear you in here bitching about shit that don't concern you? Get you some business and stop bothering Stevie."

Adrienne gets in her face.

"And, if I don't? What are you going to do?"

"Keep it up. You'll definitely find out." Aunt Rina pulls Jade back into the kitchen, while Adrienne is pushed out the front door by her mom.

"Stevie... Please open the door." Rod pleads for the third time, finally hearing the lock click and seeing the door crack open.

Sliding in, he closes the door behind himself and pulls her into a hug, sighing roughly as her raspy sobs break through.

"Shh.... I gotchu."

༺═───────────────────────────────────────═༻

After an hour or so, Stevie emerges from the bathroom and heads into the living room, not even caring about her overly puffy eyes.

"I think we should check into our hotel now. Sorry about all of that, earlier.”

"Hotel?," abuelo asks, "you didn't come all this way to stay in a hotel, doll."

"Well, it's not just me, here. I didn't know if it was okay with you, if the both of us stayed."

"You never asked, neither. Your boyfriend is family now. He's just as welcome as you've always been." Him and Rod bump fists, making her crack a smile.

"Really?"

"Do you know how big this house is? Your aunt Rina and her knuckle-headed kids, including Don, stay here from time to time and remember, this was your home, at a point. You stayed here many summers."

"I know, I know."

"I'd be quite offended if you didn't stay."

"Okay, fine! We'll stay, old man."

He laughs.

"Good. You need help getting your bags out of the car?"

"If y'all don't mind," she pokes her lip out, catching her older cousin’s eyes, who blows out a breath.

Rod smiles and kisses her forehead, before leading Derrick outside.

"Come sit, sweetheart."

Plopping down on the soft cushion, Stevie sighs. "Is she still here?"

"No, she left like, an hour ago. Nobody wants to be around that energy for too long." Don answers.

"I'm not apologizing for her, but I am sorry. You didn't deserve that." Jade adds.

"I've been through a lot of things that I haven't deserved. I'm starting to think, that's a part of life." She shrugs.

"Things like what?" Mateo asks.

"You don't wanna know. Trust me."

Stevie watches them come back in, hauling the suitcases inside, head upstairs and into the room. She stands and heads up, sliding away from the doorway as Derrick exits.

"Thanks, D."

"Of course." He pulls her into a side-hug, before walking away.

Stevie walks into the room and looks around, a faint smile gracing her lips.

"This was the room that I used to stay in, when I'd visit in the summer." She giggles at the red floor lamp.

"If there's one thing about my grandma, she never matched when it came to furniture." She walks over to the bed and unzips her suitcase, pulling her clothes out.

Sliding up behind her, Rod wraps her up in his arms. "Are you okay? Truthfully."

"Yeah, I'm okay. I'm still mad at her, but I'm fine." He presses kisses to her cheek.

"Thanks."

"For what?"

"Everything," she turns around in his hold, "I love you."

"I love you, too."

༺═───────────────────────────────────────═༻

"I could eat this for the rest of my life." Rod blurts, before eating another spoonful of cremita de maiz, a Puerto Rican version of cream of wheat.

"It's good, huh?" Gene chuckles, biting into his darkened toast. Stevie shakes her head, cutting into her pancakes.

"I don't like cream of wheat, but the sugar and cinnamon is enough for me to not mind it." Aunt Rina pats Rod's shoulders.

"I like him. Keep him."

"I plan on it." Stevie concurs.

"Mornin', mornin'.," Derrick enters the kitchen and grabs a green apple out of the fruit basket on the kitchen table.

"Good morning, man." Him and Rod slap hands.

"Morning.," Stevie scrunches up her face as Derrick kisses her forehead.

"My girlfriend's comin' through, later. I thought I'd be nice and take y'all out. There's this club out in West Hollywood, Silk, that's always jumpin'."

"It'd be fun to let my hair down. I'm up for it! Baby?" She turns to Rod to see how he feels.

"You know I'm with whatever you with, mama."

"It's settled," Derrick announces with a clap of his hands, "y'all better not punk out on me like a couple lames."

"Ain't nobody finna punk out, meathead," she flicks him in the temple.

"You lucky you my cousin, I'd put ya lil ass in a headlock."

"Cut it out, you two," Rina cuts into the pair's back and forth, "y'all are not twelve years old anymore."

"She started it," Derrick pouts.

"I didn't start it. You started it."

"¡Ya!," she nips the impending back and forth in the bud, "Do I have to ground your grown asses??"

"No, tía."

"No, mama." They respond simultaneously. Rod has to chuckle at how quickly she gets the two adults together.

After breakfast, Stevie and Jade are in the living room sprawled out on the sofa, with Rod kicking it on the floor right below Stevie's head.

She gasps seemingly randomly, making Jade look up.

"What's up?"

"I don't have anything to wear tonight! Nothing nice enough to step into a club named Silk at least."

"You know what that means right, cuz? Shopping trip!" She does a little shimmy at the idea of going to the mall. "I hope you grew out of that awkward phase from high school, because you will not be walking in the club with me dressed like Lisa Turtle."

"¡Chíngate!"

That sends Jade into a giggle fit. "I'm just kidding, Alaina." She pinches her cousin's reddened cheek.

"Who the hell is Lisa Turtle?", Rod speaks up, genuinely confused.

"You never watched Saved by the Bell??", Jade asks.

"Do I look like somebody that watched something called Saved by the Bell?", he retorts jokingly.

"Fair," she says with a laugh, "well, my girl just could not dress. Walked out the house looking like the 80's threw up on her every morning. I'm talking big shoulders, loud ass colors and patterns, them big ass bows in her head, mom jeans", she visibly shudders at the memory, "and kitten heels when she was feeling herself, but my boo got it together, though."

"Damn baby girl, you were out here on your Madonna shit?", he ends with a Windex laugh.

"Like a virgin!" Jade sings, falling into another laughing fit at her own antics.

"You can kiss the fattest part of my ass, Jade!" Stevie throws a pillow at her head making her laugh even harder.

"Ehhh, I'll let Rod handle that, babe."

"I need a new goddamn family," Stevie says under her breath, readjusting her position on the couch.

"Oh please, you love us."

"Debatable." Jade's jaw drops, and it's Stevie's turn to laugh. "I'm just kidding, Lorena." She mocks her earlier sentiment.

The rest of the morning is full of more laughter and embarrassing childhood stories.

Around 3pm, the girls decided to make their excursion to the nearby shopping mall, letting the boys play video games on Derrick's PlayStation.

They traversed almost the entire mall looking for the perfect dress for the evening, but nothing was tickling Stevie's fancy.

That was until they came to a boutique at the very end of the mall, Luxe.

The dresses in the window were stunning enough to have them both make their way inside.

They both skim through the racks, loving everything they saw, when Stevie shrieks.

"Girl, what?? You saw a rat?"

"No, fool! I found the perfect look for tonight."

"Let me see it!"

Stevie holds the pale blue 2-piece set against her body.

"Ooh, bitch! That's hella fly. Rod's gonna have a fit!"

"He'll have to deal because I'm getting this."

She finds coordinating platforms and gold jewelry to complete her look.

When they get back home, Rod tries to peek in her bag to see what she bought, but she swats his hand away.

"Move, nosy rosy."

He puts his hand over his heart in fake shock. "I can't see it?"

"You'll see it tonight," she says teasingly, popping up on her tiptoes to reach his lips, pecking them.

"Hey, hey. None of that nasty shit.", Jade pipes up.

"Don't be a hater all your life, boo. There's someone for you, too."

"Piss off!"

"Awww, is the widdle baby upset?", she pinches her cousin's cheek.

"Ay, be nice." Rod quickly swats her backside, making her jump.

"Well, looky looky. Somebody finally got Miss Smart Mouth in check, huh? I like you more and more everyday, Roderick."

"Don't you have anything else to do??", Stevie grumbles, annoyed and slightly embarrassed.

"Nope! I can get on your nerves all day, cuz," Jade says cheerily.

Stevie rolls her eyes, heading upstairs to put away her purchases.

༺═───────────────────────────────────────═༻

Later that evening...

Stevie's putting the final touches on her look for the night. Her usual ringlets are bone straight and pulled into a high pony that grazes the top of her behind.

The makeup she wears is subtle with nude, glossed lips, wispy lashes, and matte, bronzed skin. Her legs look a mile long in the gold platforms that complement the gold hardware in her outfit.

Feeling diva-ish from being in the City of Angels, she pops on a pair of slightly oversized, baby blue shades to complete the look.

She pokes her head in Jade's room to see if she's any closer to being ready.

"We have got to cut this out," Stevie remarks as she takes in Jade's outfit for the evening. Same fit in a dark green.

They've been inadvertently dressing similarly since they were young. They always joked they could read each other's minds.

"Ooh, girl, we look cute though! And I love that your extra ass is wearing shades at night. You've come a long way, Turtle."

"Whatever! The boys are waiting. Let's get downstairs."

Walking downstairs arm in arm, Rina spots them first.

"Well, if it isn't the Bobbsey twins! You two look gorgeous."

They graciously thank her in soft voices.

Derrick and Rod look up from their conversation, and Rod feels his throat tighten.

"Damn," he mumbles before thinking.

Derrick, on the other hand, looks like he wants to throw a sheet over them as if they'd just passed out in a Baptist church.

"Yeah, you girls look beautiful. Now go change," he says in all seriousness.

They immediately hit him with the same "you got me fucked up" face.

"You can go somewhere always tryna be somebody daddy. I already have one, and I barely listen to that fool." Stevie's the first one to speak up. Rina has to keep the water she's sipped from spewing all over the counter at her niece's bluntness.

"Mama, you see how short those skirts are!", he resorts to trying to get Rina on his side, "One wrong move, and now I'm fighting every guy in the club."

"Derrick, these girls are grown! Let them be."

"But, ma--"

"That's enough, Derrick. Quieres hijos, tienes que hacerlos."

Derrick mumbles something unintelligible under his breath.

"What was that??"

"Nothing." He can feel the heat from the sandal preparing to meet his face, so he tightens up quickly.

"That's what I thought. Now--" The sound of the doorbell cuts her sentence short, and Derrick pops out of his seat to answer, knowing it's his girl, Roxanne.

He opens the door, and a stunning young woman with a pixie cut, clad in a form fitting, bright red, three piece suit appears.

"Hi, baby." Her voice is soft, almost shy as she greets him, throwing her arms around his neck. The kiss they shared is chaste since his mom is present, but sweet all the same.

"Hey, Miss Rina."

"What's going on, Roxanne? You look beautiful."

The beauty thanks her and they fall into a short conversation.

"Alright, you babies go on and have fun. I know I will," she says slickly, winking at the group.

She gives them all kisses, Rod included, and sends them on their way.

Pulling up to the imposing, brick-faced building, they're faced with a throng of young men and women chomping at the bit to get behind the velvet rope that'll grant them entry to the hottest nightclub in the city where the DJ's selections can be heard down the block.

"I thought clubs back home were hard to get into, but this is something else!", Stevie remarks as she looks at the line of people wrapped around the corner.

"Don't even sweat it, girl. Let's go," Jade responds, and they follow her with confused, yet intrigued looks.

The solid, 6'0 bouncer looks up as he hears the click clack of the girls' heels approaching him.

"'Sup, Jade," the man with intricately braided hair greets her.

"Hey, boo. How you livin'?"

"I'm straight. You know Gin in there asking for you."

"Is he now?"

"Yup. His section's on the second floor. You and your people have a good time." He unclips the rope and allows them through.

"Thanks, babe." She lightly pats his chest as she walks through.

"Damn, cuz," Stevie pipes up as they walk into the building, "you might be too damn cool for me."

"Cut it out. I just know a few people."

"And who the hell is Gin??", Derrick asks after seeing her interaction with the club's bouncer.

"Do not start that shit with me, D. I didn't come here to argue with you. Now I know there's a Cosmo with my name on it. Y'all drinking?"

She receives scattered affirmations, and they head to the bar.

California Love starts playing as Jade leads them to the second level she was directed to earlier, and she, Derrick, and Roxanne immediately start rapping along flawlessly.

Stevie bops along to the infectious rhythm, while Rod looks like the out of place New Yorker he is.

"Bruh, tell me you know this song," Derrick says when he takes in Rod's stiffness.

"Can't say that I do, playa."

Derrick & his sister's jaws both drop at the revelation.

"How do you not know about the goat?! This song is everywhere!", Jade exclaims in disbelief.

"The who??"

"Please don't get him going on this east vs. west shit. We'll be here all night," Stevie intervenes.

"Babe, the goat, though??"

Stevie gives him a look that warns him to quit while he's ahead, which he does.

The music continues with the latest in hip-hop with the drinks that keep flowing.

The girls down shots while rapping to Whatta Man. The tequila runs through their veins and loosens them up.

"What's up, stranger?", a smooth voice sounds, directly behind Jade.

She turns face to face with the handsome gentleman, whose decked out in a lime green, silk Versace blouse with sparkling diamond adornments from his fingers to his ears.

"Hello, Elgin." She remains impassive while the flock of women present look like they want to yank out her hair.

"I've been tryna hit you up all week. When are you gonna stop playing with my heart, gorgeous?"

"When you stop wearing crop tops on the red carpet," her quick wit causes her to blurt out.

Stevie & Roxanne are watching the exchange with their jaws making friends with the floor, as Jade casually brushes off the man whose song is playing in the club as they speak.

He takes the playful dig in stride, and tries persuading her to come with him so they can "talk", which she politely declines.

"I don't think so, pretty boy. I'm here with my people."

"Do not sweat us! We good, boo."

Stevie nods along in agreement. "Yeah, girl. We got them two knuckleheads back there."

Jade shakes her head with a chuckle, turning back to her admirer, who has a smirk on his face.

"You have ten minutes to convince me why I should give you the time of day."

"I don't even need that long, ma." He extends his arm for her to take, and she does, following his lead.

"She something else, isn't she?"

"I need to take a page or two out of her book. Don't tell her I said that, though." The remaining girls share a laugh.

"Ay, why y'all let my sister run off with that negro and his S-Curl?"

"Derrick, relax! She's a smart girl. She's not going anywhere if she doesn't feel safe," Stevie speaks up in defense of her cousin.

"Well, she has 15 minutes to show her face again or I'm setting it off in here."

"Okay, dad, sheesh. We need to get some more liquor in you."

"Yes!" Roxanne agrees wholeheartedly, only her reasons are a bit more...selfish. She knows he'll put a dent in the headboard with the right amount of brown in him.

While her cousin canoodles with an R&B heartthrob, the truth serum running through Stevie's system has her feeling extra touchy with her own.

Nobody serves as the soundtrack while she winds her hips against his, her hands traveling across any part of him they could reach.

She spins herself around to face him, wrapping her arms around his waist.

"You know what I think?", she asks against his lips. Her words are slurred and heavy with lust.

"Hmm?" The Henny has hit him in the best way, and Stevie's hands are sending sparks through his whole being.

"I think," she pauses to kiss his slightly parted mouth, "we should get outta here."

"What about Derrick?", he asks, really only halfway concerned.

"He'll figure it out."

With that, she hooks her finger in the front of his belt buckle and leads him through the crowd of people, outside to the fresh, night air.

They hail the first cab that rolls up to the club, ambling into the backseat. Rod barely gets the address out before she's in his lap sucking and nibbling on the sweet spots of his neck. The poor cab driver simply shakes his head with a chuckle, minding his business.

He has to stop her when her hands get to trying to unbuckle his belt.

"I will fuck you up in the back of this cab, Vie," he warns closely in her ear.

She licks the shell of his ear. "I dare you," she whispers seductively.

"Alright now," the driver sounds from the front, "I don't want you youngins to mess around and catch a charge over some hanky panky. Trust me. Save all that for when you get home."

Listening to the older man, Stevie reluctantly moves herself off Rod's lap, opting to sit closer to her passenger side door. That doesn't stop the sensual, fleeting touches between the two of them.

They nearly run out of the taxi once they reach their destination. Stevie ducks down near several rocks where Rina keeps a spare key hidden underneath one.

It's quiet as a church mouse as they enter, so they try their best to creep to their room undetected.

They're almost successful until Stevie's platforms finally get the better of her, and she loses her balance reaching the top of the stairs.

She squeals in shock, but she's caught by Rod's strong arms before she can hit the ground.

Staring at each other in silence for a moment, Stevie bursts into a fit of giggles, and in his attempt to quiet her down, Rod finds himself laughing too.

"Babe, your aunt is gonna come out here and beat our asses. Shhh." He puts a finger to her lips for emphasis.

She nods as if she agrees, but a few giggles escape her still. So, he scoops her up, carrying her the rest of the way. He uses his foot to close the door as quietly as he can.

Setting her gently on the bed, he takes her ankle in his hand to remove the offending, yet sexy footwear. With her legs gapped, he notices her smooth, glistening womanhood. He shoots her a questioning glance which she responds to with a wink.

Yanking her down to the edge of the bed by her ankle, he pins her legs back into the mattress and latches his lips onto her clit.

Her breathy sighs and gasps have him straining through the thick fabric of his jeans.

She pops the buttons on her top and uses a free hand to roll her nipple between her fingers, increasing the euphoric feelings.

The fact that she's pinned down and essentially forced to take this tongue lashing intensifies the feeling tenfold. Her hands run over his waves. Her almond acrylics running along his scalp send tingles down his spine, and he groans against her.

The familiar coil in her lower stomach tightens, and her thighs begin to quiver signaling her impending release.

She has to throw her hands over her mouth to catch the long moan threatening to fly from her lips. Her nectar flows freely into his eager mouth, but that doesn't stop him from slurping her like she was a glass of ice water in the summer.

Her hands find the top of his head in an attempt to push him away, but he's relentless.

Finally, he pulls away from her over-sensitive bud with an obscene pop, and she closes her legs putting her hands between them.

"Shit," she breathes, trying to bring herself down.

"You tappin' out on me already?", he taunts her. "You was talkin' big shit earlier."

While he's talking he pulls his pants and boxers down to his ankles in one swift motion kicking them off. "Now, put that ass up," he commands, smacking her thigh.

She rolls over, putting a deep arch in her back just how he likes it. He bunches her skirt up around her waist and sinks his entire length into her heat, eliciting a drawn out curse from the both of them simultaneously.

His nails dig into the soft flesh of her hips as he grinds in and out, allowing her to become accustomed to his size.

Not pleased with the low groans that make it past the barrier of her lower lip that's been tucked between her teeth, he takes her ponytail and wraps it around his hand, pulling her flush against his chest.

"Let me hear that shit, princess." He licks the sweet spot near the base of her ear, mimicking her earlier teasing.

His strokes become merciless, filling her to the hilt.

"Oh, fffuck! Baby, you're so fucking deep! Shit!" Her eyes roll to the back of her head while he continues to bring her closer and closer to the edge, his heavy hand coming down on her ass at different intervals.

Her head swims as she teeters back and forth in the space between pleasure and pain.

His hand moves from her hair to her neck, pulling her back up when she slumps forward. He feels her walls pulsate around him, and he knows she's right there.

The combination of his thumb applying the perfect amount of pressure and his filthy words of encouragement in her ear send her gushing all over his length, with his own release following shortly thereafter.

Heavy breathing soon turns into soft snores, as they collapse into the covers.

༺═───────────────────────────────────────═༻

The throbbing pain in their heads wake them up, at the same time. By the sheer grace of God, their bodies are covered up with the thick blanket.

Stevie looks around the room, shaking her head at the way their clothes are thrown about.

"Jesus," Rod sits up, looking around as well, slightly laughing to himself.

She glances up at him, giggling as he bends down to smother her with kisses. She playfully pushes him away and jumps up from the bed, in search of his t-shirt.

"I gotta pee.," she grabs the shirt off the floor and yanks it over her head, rushing across the hall to empty her bladder.

After washing her hands, she opens the door and squeals at the sight of Derrick. Thanking God that her shirt comes below her knees, she pushes him out into the hallway.

"You scared me!," she whisper-yells.

"Oh yeah?, you two horny toads scared me, last night!," his volume a little louder than hers, "how am I supposed to keep an eye on you, if you're hailing cabs back here and not telling anybody?!"

"Derrick, you weren't in charge of 'keeping an eye on me'," she laughs. "I'm sorry that I left y'all, last night— wait."

"What?" His voice goes back to normal as her eyes zoom in on the trail of deep red hickeys on his neck.

"You had sex last night, didn't you?"

"Yeah, well, I'm grown." He blinks.

"So am I!," she thumps him in the temple, pushing him out of her way. "Got me feeling bad and shit."

"Well, you should feel bad. You still left me." He turns her back around.

"Mm, right. You were worried about wittle Ol Stevie, while Roxy was chewing on your neck like a piece of candy. Get out my face, boy."

"If you two don't get out this hallway and shut up.," aunt Rina emerges from her room, hair all over her head.

"Sorry.," the speak at once, not taking their eyes off her appearance.

"What?" She asks.

Stevie smirks, crossing her arms. "I guess we're not the only ones who had some fun, last night."

Derrick grimaces at the instant mental pictures, flooding his brain. "Gross. I'm going back to bed." He excuses himself, slamming his door shut.

"Go back to bed, Alaina.," Rina scolds with a laugh.

Stevie slides back into her room, crawling back into bed to cuddle with Rod, whose gaze is on the window, straight ahead.

"Hey," she kisses his shoulder blade.

"Hey.," he nuzzles his chin against her hair. "Thanks for bringing me out here. I enjoyed myself."

"You're officially part of family vacations, now." She laughs. "I told you, they were gonna love you. Hell, they might ship me back to New York and keep you hostage."

"You're corny, vie."

"And, you love me!"

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