#I'll be knocked out immediately after I post this

[k1ng-ej]

Shadow the Hedgehog X Reader

A valentine's confession

Note: first time writing for this silly guy, expect more vday related posts. i might open requests again soon, ive been in a depression episode for a hot minute now so this is the first thing ive written in a few days, i love him so much. Requests for him are open!

Shadow stood at your front door, hesitating to knock. For months you had enthusiastically shared your excitement for Valentine's day, mentioning it daily. During this time, Shadow wrested with his feelings. Each time you appeared with that radiant smile, he felt a spark in his chest that drew him closer to you than anyone else. He found himself paying more attention to your words and frequently caught himself admiring you from afar. Yet, he couldn't quite place his finger on what this feeling was, or, he was just in denial about them. As Valentine's day approached, with the sun dipping below the horizon, Shadow couldn't shake the worry of your absence. After all the excitement you had generated around this day, you had vanished just when it finally arrived. He asked others where you were, but no one knew

Finally, with a long sigh, he drew three sharp knocks to your door. He could hear muffled groans, a few clattering sounds, some muttered curses, and finally the unmistakable sound of locks turning as you opened your door. Instantly, he took in your disheveled state: the dullness in your eyes, the tangled mess of your hair, and the wrinkled clothes that suggested a sleepless night. You sniffled, surprise flashing across your face.

"Shadow! What's up? Did you need somethin'?" You asked, leaning against the door-frame. Shadow quickly realized that you were sick, and that was why you were cooped up in your house all day.

"Do you have a cold?"

"Oh, uh, yeah. Unfortunately came down with it last night and, man, this is a rough one. Usually a little cold doesn't keep me in bed all day but this one sure did!" You explained, your voice was hoarse, no doubt from all the coughing you were probably doing.

Shadow quirked an eyebrow at you. "Have you been taking medication?"

From the way you immediately broke eye contact and started fumbling over your words, he knew that was a no. You always were stubborn. He sighed and shook his head at you, and he noted the way you tensed up. Did you think he was angry?

"It'll help you get over it faster."

"That's the thing… I- Er- I don't have any medicine for it right now and I've been too sick to go out and get some." You frowned, running a hand through your hair to smooth it down.

"I'll get you some. Go rest. Leave the door unlocked, I'll be back." He swiftly spun on his heel, you tried to stop him, but before you could even get a word out he used Chaos Control. Shadow told himself that he was simply doing what any other mobian would do if someone they knew was sick, and this wasn't him caring about your well-being. The more he tried to bury and deny his feelings, the more they grew. Deep down, he knew what he was feeling, but he had never felt this way toward anyone and so he wasn't sure what he should do. The thought of letting someone inside of the walls that he so strongly built around himself scared him, the idea of being vulnerable made his chest tight.

Without hesitation, he swiftly collected medicine for your cold and picked up a couple of soups, hoping they would soothe your sore throat. After completing the purchase, he returned to your front door and opened it without a second thought. This was Shadow's first time inside your home, and he took a moment to absorb the surroundings. It was clear you appreciated a cozy living environment; a few plants decorated the windows in both your kitchen and living room. Your minimalistic decor showcased an eye for style, and the space was impeccably tidy. After mentally mapping out your home's layout, Shadow stepped into the kitchen and placed the bag of supplies on the counter. He then retrieved the medicine, quickly checking the recommended dosage before filling a glass with water. He paused, surely you could do this yourself right?

He shook his head, he wanted to take care of you. He was coming to terms with that.

Slowly, he approached your bedroom door, pills and water in hand. He knocked, he heard your muffled voice allow him entrance. Upon entering, he blinked, taking in the mess of your room. It was a stark contrast to how organized and clean the rest of your house was. Laundry was strewn about, a couple used tissues laid next to the full mini trash can next to your bed, some blankets and pillows thrown on the floor.

"Sorry for the mess… Haven't had the energy to clean up." You scratched your head, cheeks hot with embarrassment.

"Don't worry about it." Shadow simply shook his head and stood next to your bed where you laid. He placed the glass of water on your bedside table, then held out his gloved hand, two pills sitting in his palm. You promptly sat up, and he watched you swallow the pills quickly, a look of disgust on your face afterward. He assumed you weren't the biggest fan of pills. Shadow took another look around your room, he felt a pull to clean up for you.

Taking care of others would normally irritate Shadow, but when it came to you he felt naturally inclined to do so. You were the first one he would run to on the field, the first one he would ask if you were okay. There was no denying the feelings he had developed for you, but he was scared of them.

"Shadow, you okay?" The sound of your voice, and the feeling of your warm hand on his shoulder brought him from his thoughts. When you retracted your hand, he couldn't help but miss the warmth is provided.

"Would you like if I tidied up for you?"

His question definitely shocked you, and you were quick to decline. Despite Shadow asking, he was not taking no for an answer. He huffed air through his nose as he reached over you and grabbed your TV remote, quickly putting something on for you to watch while he began cleaning. The mess did not bother him, he was quite an organized hedgehog himself and liked his belongings in order. Judging from the rest of your house, you were similar, and he knew the mess probably bothered you. He started by picking up all the laundry on the floor, throwing it into the basket that sat in the corner of your room, then put your bedding back onto your bed, and finally picked up the pieces of trash that laid about. Thankfully, the movie he had randomly chosen for you kept you entertained, and not protesting his offer to clean for you.

He threw the load of laundry into the washer, then came back to your bedroom to check on you.

"Are you hungry?" He asked, standing next to your bed with his arms crossed over his chest. He didn't know if it was intentional, but you stared at him for a solid minute, he grew nervous under your gaze, his heart rate picked up.

"Hm, I guess I could go for some food." You shrugged, starting to swing your legs off the bed.

"What are you doing?"

You paused, clearing your throat. "Going to make food?"

You watched Shadows expression change from confusion to annoyance, had you said something? Was he annoyed because he was taking care of you? You didn't know, but you felt tense under his narrowed gaze.

"I can make it for you. You need to rest." His tone came out harsh, but there was a hint of care laced somewhere. Shadow always wore a grumpy facade, making it difficult to discern when he was genuinely upset. However, as you spent more time with him, you began to notice the subtle nuances in his behavior that others overlooked. It was unclear whether he was aware of it, but he frequently reached out to those he cared about. You had witnessed him do this with you several times, and each instance sent a rush of butterflies through your stomach. While Shadow showed concern for others, including Sonic, it was evident that his attention toward you was different. The depth of his care ignited feelings within you that you couldn't ignore.

You had planned your Valentines perfectly, you were going to wake up early this morning, run out and grab a few cheesy gifts, and present them to Shadow in private, asking if he would be your valentine. It was a bold move, really, but you couldn't dance around your feelings forever. So when you came down with your cold, you were bummed. You didn't expect Shadow to come and check on you, but you had to admit it made you feel warm inside.

You stood from your bed and padded out into the living room, Shadow was in the kitchen, stirring your noodles until he heard your footsteps behind him. He swiftly turned around, creasing his eyebrows.

"Relax! I'm okay, I need to stretch my legs, I've been laying down for hours." You held your hands up in mock surrender, waiting for him to start scolding you for not resting. Instead, a long sigh escaped his lips.

"Fine. But when your food is done you're sitting on the couch." He said sternly, eyeing you until you nodded in agreement.

You leaned against the counter, eyeing the pot of noodles on your stove. You didn't have an appetite for anything, but you knew trying to eat something was better than not eating at all. Shadow stood just in front of the stove, his gaze was fixed on the pot, but his mind seemed elsewhere.

"Hey Shadow?" You called, the words leaving your lips before you could think. "Can I… Confess something?"

He blinked and turned to meet your gaze. In that moment, you felt incredibly small beneath his intense stare, your nerves overwhelming as you struggled to meet his crimson eyes. Uncertain of why you found your voice, you had no idea how to articulate your next thought. You had been waiting for Valentine's Day to confess your feelings to Shadow, and you refused to let anything, especially the cold, deter you— especially not with him right in front of you, an opportunity life had presented. Your heart raced wildly against your chest, a knot of anxiety tightening in your stomach.

You inhaled deeply. "I, uh, originally had some special plans for today. Since it is Valentines and all. Er… plans for a special someone, someone that I like."

Shadows brows raised, and for a brief moment you saw a flicker of hurt in his eyes.

"He's… complicated to understand." You continued, "He doesn't let anyone close emotionally, and he puts on this tough front but deep down he has a soft, and caring heart. I had the perfect day planned, I was going to buy flowers, and a candy I think he might like, and then… I was going to take him to a little secluded area, give him the gifts and confess my feelings. But then I got this stupid cold!" You sighed and pushed yourself off the counter, you pinched the bridge of your nose, a blush creeping up on your cheeks. You knew Shadow was smart, he could figure out you were talking about him, but you wanted to tell him directly that you liked him.

"It's you. I had that planned for you, because I like you." You finished, shyly looking at him and awaiting his reaction.

First, he was shocked, then confused, then a look of… relief? And finally, he exhaled.

"The feelings are… mutual." Shadow ran a nervous hand through his quills, and he looked away from you. You found it cute how he, The Ultimate Lifeform, was getting shy while confessing his crush on you. You couldn't help but giggle, and his eyes quickly snapped back to you.

"What's so funny?" His brows furrowed, replacing the relaxed expression he had just seconds before. You reached out, placing your hand on his shoulder. He looked at your hand, then to you as you spoke.

"Nothing, nothing. It's just… I was expecting a rejection, or something along those lines. But, it's nice to know the feelings are reciprocated."

Heat rushed to his cheeks, and Shadow quickly regained his composure, turning back to the stove to finish preparing your soup. He couldn't bring himself to meet your gaze; his heart raced so wildly that he feared you might hear it too.

Despite his efforts to look away, your hand remained on his shoulder, providing a comforting presence he desperately needed. He was taken aback by your openness about your feelings; he never expected you to harbor such emotions for him. Relief mingled with nervousness and fear; acknowledging that you both liked each other led him to question the next steps toward a relationship. Did he truly want to pursue this? Could he offer you the support and care you deserved? Was he the right partner for you?

Communication was not his strong suit; he was accustomed to keeping everything bottled up inside. He worried that his tendency to be distant might push you away, and self-doubt clouded his mind, leaving him frustrated with himself. Yet, when he glanced at you again and caught the twinkle in your eye, the rosy blush on your cheeks, and the smile dancing on your lips, all those uncertainties faded away.

He followed you into the living room and sat next to you on the couch, he watched you slowly eat your soap, he could tell that you instantly felt relief in your throat, a satisfied hum rumbling in your chest. Even while sick, he looked at you with awe. Shadow always appreciated your looks, specifically your face. Whenever you smiled at him, his heart fluttered. The feeling was foreign, and when it first started he thought he was sick.

"This is good," You broke the silence, bowl resting in your lap. Shadow had positioned himself on the other end of the couch, you chuckled. "I don't bite. C'mon, sit next to me."

Despite how bold and straightforward you were being, anxiety swirled in your stomach. You knew Shadow would not make any first moves or initiate anything, whether it was because he didn't want to cross boundaries, or was too scared, you didn't mind. You watched him slowly scoot to the spot next to you, it made you smile. You put a show on the TV, and indulged in the soup he made for you. You didn't know what came after confessing your feelings for each other, but you were sure you could worry about that another time. For now, you wanted to relax, and enjoy the company you had while you were sick.

You placed your now empty bowl on the small table in front of the couch before leaning back. You thought for a moment, then leaned your shoulder against Shadows. He stiffened, not expecting the sudden contact, and unsure what to do. You stayed like that, and eventually you felt him relax, and heard a content sigh come from him.

[taruruchi]

𝐃𝐚𝐲 4: 𝐏𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐲𝐨

Inspired by this post by @h0neybane !!

Random note I just wanna mention: Evelyn's drawing didn't have a veil and the crown/tiara (what's the difference) but I was looking at Ariel's wedding dress and wanted to reference those parts of the fit HSBDJNSFN

Taglist: @solxima @angelwishess @scint1llat3 @distant-velleity @twtysevapr @cynthinesia @h0neybane @viperbunnies @linabirb @thehollowwriter @wafflethewitchboy @siphoklansan @jewelulu @skibidibabygirl @jadelover69 (ask me if you wanna be added/removed! also if you wanna be removed just for february bc I'm posting every day 😭)

[zephyrchama]

You were sick. Your head was in a fog and your throat hurt something fierce. It was sweltering hot yet you shivered under the covers, hoping for the fever to pass soon. Your body, doing its best to get better, decided to empty the contents of your stomach over the side of the bed.

Beelzebub was the first to discover your condition. He came to wake you up in person when you hadn't shown up on time for breakfast. You were teetering like a newborn deer trying to clean up your mess. He was taken aback at the sight, at how clammy you were, and gently wiped the sweat from your face while checking how warm your forehead was. "You should lay down," he recommended, practically pushing you back into bed. You asked him to guide you to the bathroom instead.

He disappeared to fetch Lucifer. The eldest arrived immediately upon being informed of your condition. Your face muscles twitched as you tried to hold back a second round and apologized for the state you were in. Lucifer told you to stay quiet and just rest. "If you want to apologize, then get better soon."

"Don't tell anyone about this, ok?" you tried to ask. It came out as a garbled, barely perceptible whisper sending bolts of pain through your neck. You didn't want anyone to know how bad things really were.

"I do need to inform Diavolo, but rest assured I'll keep it brief." After ensuring you had water and would be fine alone for a few hours, Lucifer left early to inform RAD of your absence. He later texted you, "Don't hesitate to summon me if you need anything."

The house was quiet. It felt surreal to be the only one there. After some time had passed, you hobbled back to your bedroom and tried to sleep through the pain. Blissfully unaware of the chaos occurring elsewhere.

RAD is no small academy by any means, but rumors sure do spread fast. In first period, Beelzebub told Belphegor the sight he witnessed. They were overheard by Asmodeus, who lamented your absence to Solomon. Solomon asked Raphael to come with him to prepare some nutritious human food so you'd recover faster, and had to be forcibly stopped by Simeon. Luke found out by interrogating Solomon about why he was causing a scene in the kitchen.

Mephistopheles caught wind of the gossip and went directly to Diavolo for confirmation. Lucifer was none too happy at the situation, but the rumor mill was already spinning in full force. He did his best to uphold your image by telling anyone who broached the subject, "it's just the sniffles."

By lunchtime, Mammon was taking bets on how sick you were. "500 grimm says they're explodin' from both ends." "If that were the case, one of us would have stayed at the house with them," Satan rebutted, spying an easy win. "500 grimm says it's just coming out the bottom." They went back and forth, with others occasionally chipping in new symptoms such as hives or internal bleeding. Asmodeus, unable to listen any longer, left the cafeteria to post vague stories about his concern for you on social media.

Leviathan and Thirteen sent you get-well-soon text messages. One was full of worry and asked you to respond ASAP so they knew you weren't dying, as anxiety over your condition was causing them no end of fear. The other assured you to rest easy knowing that your candle was fine and you had plenty of time left before you kicked the bucket. It even recommended passing your bug onto someone else for fun.

You only saw the notifications in the evening, when a pounding headache woke you up and resounding footsteps in the hall signaled that people were home from school.

There was a knock at the door and Lucifer announced you had company. The crown prince and his butler imposed with a tray of fresh herbal tea. It would have smelled amazing if you possessed the ability to breathe through your nose. As the door shut behind them, you spotted at least ten figures out in the hallway.

Barbatos silently served you a hot cup, hopeful the rising stream would assist your sinuses. "Looks like you're recovering well!" Diavolo chimed. "That's great. I feared you were going to heave your guts out all day."

The frank sincerity caught you off guard and you choked on your tea. Barbatos was quick to grab the cup before it spilled.

"You knew?" you rasped. "Oh yes. Lucifer said it wasn't that bad, but tales of your illness have spread all over campus. We know human bodies aren't very strong."

You hunched down into the blankets to hide. The heat spreading across your face this time was not due to fever.

[osaemu]

GOJO SATORU: ❛❛ IS IT OVER NOW? (IT ISN'T) ❜❜

.ೃ࿐ streamer!au: all good things come to an end, including your relationship—but don't worry, broken hearts can be mended, but only if you're both willing to try.

contents: fem!reader. you two break up and make up! you guys fight/break up over something that coulda been resolved with better communication. kinda suggestive ending, maybe i'll drop a part two if this does alright. satoru announces your break-up on his stream. longest fic i've posted so far, 4k words (kms).

author's note: the long awaited angst has finally arrived.. big thank you to @screampied for beta-reading!! tagging @yunymphs who read it early and @sutorus + @kentopedia who i both miss very much!!

ever since you first joined satoru on his stream, it’s gotten way more popular than either of you could’ve ever expected. before he brought you onto his live, he was averaging about eight thousand views per stream. now, his average was well over fifteen thousand—and that wasn't even including the publicity he got from other websites. when satoru accidentally left the camera on while you two made out, you two went viral on twitter. and when another user tried to swipe him away, the clip got over a hundred thousand views on youtube.

at first, satoru didn't mind the change his stream was going through—in fact, he welcomed it. but lately, things have been… different.

last week, while satoru was playing in some competition, he won first out of hundreds of equally proficient players. had it been anyone else, their comments would've been filled with congratulations and good job's, but in his case, all satoru got were messages asking where you were. that wasn’t the first time—ever since that very first day, when you showed up on his stream, satoru’s audience has entirely shifted. and honestly, if you were in his position, you'd be a bit annoyed. anyone would be. 

but you had never expected that it would be so big of a deal that you and satoru—the "cutest couple on the internet"—would break up over it.

you walk along the chilly, suburban sidewalk up to your boyfriend’s house. satoru had just sent you a message asking if you could come over, and like always, you answered with an immediate yes. a flock of crows fly by, raven feathers providing a stark contrast between them and the pale gray sky around you. it’s gray and gloomy, but not unpleasant. 

a sweet, romantic song plays in your ears as you knock three times on satoru’s front door. his familiar voice calls out “coming!”, and you can hear his footsteps grow louder and louder until he swings open the door. satoru smiles down at you, cheeks already rosy from the cold winter air. “hey.”

you tilt your head and smile back at him. “that’s all i get? hey?” you huff, walking into his living room behind him as the door closes behind you. “d’you have any hot chocolate? i’m freezing,” you say, licking your lips. satoru turns and pauses, an unreadable expression on his face. “satoru?”

after a moment, your boyfriend snaps out of it. “oh, yeah, sorry,” he says ruefully. satoru rubs his eyes with one hand and uses the other to open the door to his bedroom, and as you follow him in, you’re hit with a blast of warm air. “i’m just kinda tired, but yeah, i have some hot cocoa in here. c’mon.”

“anything i can do for you?” you offer, sitting down on the corner of his bed. you’ve been to his house so many times that it feels like home—maybe even more so than your own place. everything about satoru’s room is comfortable, from his plush chairs to the faux-fur blankets draped over every single piece of his furniture. you could probably fall over at any given point and it wouldn’t actually hurt—you’d just land on something soft and/or fluffy.

but that wasn’t all that made you so in love with his home. it was just the way it felt—words couldn’t describe the way everything was just so right and just so perfect, and you really did hope that you’d never have to see a time where you wouldn’t be able to spend time with your boyfriend here.

it really is a shame that all good things had to come to an end. at least, that’s what you kept telling yourself as satoru finally told you why he called you over. unlike nearly every other time, it wasn’t because he missed you or wanted to cuddle—it was quite the opposite, really.

“i don’t think this is working.”

six words that shattered the life you had come to know and love.

“is this a joke?” you try, an unnerved smile spreading across your lips against your will. he doesn’t reply instantly, which is so out-of-character for him that it makes you stiffen up. “satoru, this isn’t funny—”

“i’m not kidding,” satoru murmurs, looking away. he refuses to meet your eyes, and some part of you is still desperately trying to find reason in the chaos that’s slowly taking over your mind. how could it be that everything was just fine two minutes ago and now it’s anything but that? did something happen? did you say the wrong thing? did you—

“it’s not funny,” you insist, still somehow clinging onto your slowly-dwindling hope. maybe you’re in denial, but still, you were sure that everything was fine—no, that everything is fine. there was no past-tense, right? how could the glass home you’d built with your bare hands just crash down at the throw of a pebble?

satoru finally meets your eyes, and your breath catches in your throat. there’s no amused glimmer in his eyes, no “just kidding” in sight, and even worse, you can’t even see an ounce of the love or adoration you’d come to grow so attached to in just a couple months.

“what happened?” you whisper, miraculously managing to keep yourself together. you’d never forgive yourself if you just started crying over a breakup you weren’t even sure was happening—what little’s left of your pride is holding on. you allow yourself to wrap your arms around your chest, curling into your own embrace. 

satoru doesn’t reply for a long second. right when you’re sure he just won’t reply, he does, and it all comes spilling out in a messy stream of words. “it’s just… i can’t do this anymore. i can’t keep going online and seeing everyone on my stream talking about you. i love you, i really do, but it’s just—” satoru shakes his head frustratedly. “i don’t know how to say it, but you know what i mean, right?”

your eyebrows furrow and you shake your head. “you’re breaking up with me because you’re tired of seeing me?”

“no, fuck,” satoru groans, running a hand through his hair. his previously cool and collected demeanor starts to fall apart as he takes a step back. “i don’t know how to explain it, but— shit, you wouldn’t understand.”

you swallow and start to stand up, still willing to try. “then help me understand, satoru, i—”

“you’ve seen the comments, and you’ve seen all the posts on twitter,” satoru says, tilting his head back and glaring at the ceiling. “it’s not your fault, but i really just can’t stand everyone disregarding me and turning my own stream into a youtube channel starring you.”

his words sting like alcohol in an open wound, and you fight the battle of your life to prevent the thousands of tears hiding behind your eyes from being visible. even so, your voice wobbles ever so slightly as you say “that’s a bullshit reason to break up, satoru—”

your boyfriend—is he even still your boyfriend?—scoffs and shakes his head, stumbling back and falling into his chair. "for you, it isn't. you wouldn’t understand. for me, it's like everyone's just... invalidating the three years i've spent on this shit. and i can't do it anymore, i just can't."

you blink slowly, backing away towards his bedroom door. "what does that mean?"

satoru exhales a bitter laugh and turns away, the back of his chair facing you. you think you can hear him take a soft, shaky breath as the room falls silent. neither of you make a sound before satoru turns back toward you, a blank look on his face.

he looks up at you, azure eyes devoid of the sparkle you've become so familiar with. satoru smiles sadly, but to your dismay, there's no real emotion behind it. it's almost like he's already accepted it when he says, "it means we—" he pauses and looks away. "this is over."

you reach out toward him, desperate to hold on to him—to the invisible string that ties you and satoru together, but he's just out of your grasp. "satoru, it isn't even that big of a deal, why are you—"

satoru turns and fixes you with a stern glare, and just like that, the string that kept you and satoru together for months, maybe years snaps, and you're left with a limp strand of what it once was. taking the hint, you walk out of his room in a daze, hardly noticing the way he says "i'm sorry".

and the worst part? he said he still loved you. but apparently that wasn’t enough.

satoru has every right to be annoyed that his stream is only growing because of you—his stream was the way he made money, and after all, it was never meant to be about you. 

and maybe he was never meant to be for you either.

the walk home is cold and lonely. you slip a hand into your pocket—the pocket of satoru's hoodie, which you should probably return to him—and extract your earphones. it probably isn't a good idea to wear both outside as you walk home, but you do it anyway—this day can't possibly get any worse.

a soft voice murmurs words of sorrow and encouragement in your ear as the music takes you to another world. maybe this—the breakup—was meant to happen. maybe it was a mistake to date a boy with thousands of fans.

as soon as you get home, your phone dings softly. you pick it up and frown when you see it's from toru. you'd have to change that name later.

toru: idk if u blocked me already but i still have a lot of ur things, do u wanna come pick them up later?

toru: or i can drop them off tmrw ig

you miss the way he used to text you—with an obnoxious amount of exclamation points and an even worse amount of emojis. now, it's like all of the flavor's gone from his words, and it hurts. that's when it actually settles in, that this is really over. it hurts like an icicle being driven straight through your heart, and it stings like one, too.

satoru's texts are left on delivered for five whole minutes before you reply, and it's only with an "i'll come by tmrw". he likes the message less than a minute later, and you're left to wallow in your misery alone until you finally drift off to sleep.

the next morning, you open your phone to a notification alerting you that satoru’ll be live on stream in ten minutes. curiosity kills the cat, but in this case, maybe it’d be worth it to see what he tells his viewers about your breakup. after all, there’s no way he wouldn’t tell them—he always had something to say about you, and he’d probably rather tell them for sure rather than let them come up with ridiculous theories on their own.

so you hastily make a new account using some email account you haven’t touched since middle school, trying a couple different passwords until you remember the one that works. the website hits you with a hundred questions, asking you about your favorite games and who’d you like to subscribe to first. you choose satoru, albeit after a second of hesitation. two minutes later, sparklingzebra672 joins your ex-boyfriend’s stream. you wait a second, holding your breath as the live loads. a brief moment later, satoru’s painfully familiar face appears on your screen.

“hey guys,” satoru says, forcing a smile on his face. even from behind a screen, you swear you can feel his eyes on you. “how’s everyone today?” 

the already unstable smile on satoru’s face falls when he opens the comments and gets greeted with a flurry of where’s your girlfriend’s. had you been anyone else, you probably wouldn’t have noticed the way satoru’s eyes dulled ever so slightly or the way he curled into himself, but being the girl who once knew him best, you could tell.

“oh, she won’t be back on here for… a while,” satoru starts, dancing around the topic. he leans back against his chair and tilts his chin up, azure eyes focused on the ceiling. “we broke up.”

nothing could’ve prepared you for the way satoru’s comments explode. it’s almost like you can hear the shocked gasps coming from all fourteen—no, twenty thousand viewers as the words nobody thought would ever they’d hear from satoru are spoken.

suguru-geto: holy shit im so sorry 

toji-fushiguro: wait wtf r u kidding?? that's fuckin crazy

yuuji-itadori: omg i thought u guys were together forever :(

inumaki: chat is this real??

satoru shrugs, averting his eyes from the hundreds of comments pouring in, but you scroll through and read them all. everyone, even satoru’s haters, seems genuinely shocked. in fact, had this not been your own breakup, you would’ve been one of them, begging and pleading satoru for more details.

“yeah, we did,” satoru murmurs, eyebrows furrowing just enough for you to read his expression. now that you’re looking closer, you can see the subtle redness underneath his eyes—had he been crying too? and maybe you’re imagining it, but his hair seems a bit dishelved too. your ex-boyfriend shrugs, forcing his face back into his usual lighthearted expression, but it’s not fooling anyone.

satoru scowls at the new flood of comments asking him why you two broke up. some people are already hypothesizing—maybe it’s because you got jealous of his fame, or maybe he got sick of you. maybe you left him to go date some other streamer, or maybe—

“i’m actually gonna end the stream here, ‘cause i don’t really want to deal with all of this right now,” satoru says with a frown. his eyes are narrowed irritably as a couple users protest, still begging for more details. “you guys know that i’m a real person with my own life, right? fuck off.”

and just like that, the stream ends. you’re left with a blank screen and a message saying that satoru’s ended the live, so you shut your laptop. your stomach turns as you groan, just remembering that you have to go over to his place later to retrieve your things, and somehow, you’d have to pretend that you didn’t just stalk his stream to see if he’d say anything substantial about the breakup.

a couple minutes after the stream ends, your phone blows up—every mutual friend you and satoru have is messaging you about what he said, but you can’t bring yourself to open any of them. except for one.

suguru: r u ok?

you: yeah ig

suguru: do u want anything?

satoru’s best friend’s question catches you off-guard—there are a lot of things you want. you want this whole situation to go away. you want the world to disappear. and most of all, you want satoru back, without the online world attached.

but suguru can’t do any of those things, can he? so you leave him on read. 

somehow, you fall back asleep, tossing and turning in your bed without satoru’s steady arms to accompany you. a couple hours later, you wake up again, wincing from the dim sunlight that pours through your windows and directly into your eyes. it’s just past five, so you figure that you might as well go down to satoru’s house and get your things. better to do it now than drag it out for an uncertain amount of time.

the walk is shorter than you remember, but maybe it’s just the absence of music pouring into your ears that makes it seem that way. you watch the wilted autumn leaves flutter in the wind, falling down onto the sidewalk like pieces into place. once upon a time, you had walked these very streets with satoru—it’s a fond memory you remember only all too well.

when you finally step onto your ex’s doorstep, the door opens before you even have a chance to knock. and there he is—the boy who’d once been the love of your life. satoru looks down at you with an unreadable expression. “hey.”

you think you’ve seem this film before, and you didn’t like the ending.

satoru spares you from having to reply by opening the door wider and beckoning you inside. “i already put most of your stuff into a couple boxes, but i thought you’d wanna check on your own. just in case i forgot something.”

you nod and walk past him, not trusting your voice to be steady. this was harder than you expected—much harder. in fact, you’re practically on the verge of breaking down when you step into satoru’s room and look around and see just how different it looks without the touches of you everywhere.

the fortnite poster you’d given him as a joke for the second anniversary of his stream was gone from his wall, and so were the two mini succulents that used to sit on the corner of his desk. the white cat plushie that used to rest on his pillow was gone, too—probably stuffed somewhere in one of the boxes outside his bedroom door.

after nearly a minute of looking around, you decide that whatever satoru possibly could’ve missed wasn’t important enough for you to have to stick around any longer.

you turn and start to exit satoru’s room so fast that you nearly crash into him when he suddenly appears in the doorway. “shit, sorry about that,” you mumble, trying to walk around him. but of course, because the universe is actually praying on your downfall, you and satoru both walk the same way at the same time. you awkwardly try to go around each other, and eventually, the humiliation is over.

“so, you got everything?” satoru asks, walking beside you with his hands in his pockets. you nod, bending over to pick up one of the two boxes. it’s pretty heavy, but not unmanangable. you just don’t really seem to know if you’ll be able to carry both back home at once. 

“oh, uh, i’ll be right back,” you say tentatively. a flash of confusion appears in satoru’s eyes, so you clarify, “i’m gonna go grab my car. that’ll make it easier.”

satoru’s eyebrows furrow and he shakes his head. “no, it’s alright. your place isn’t far from here at all, i’ll just take the other and walk back with you.”

“no, really, it’s alright.”

“it’s the easiest option, ba—” satoru cuts himself off, stopping himself from calling you baby for the first time since you two had started dating. “sorry.”

“let’s just go.”

the walk back to your house is brutal. you walk side by side with satoru since the path is wide enough for you to do so, and you two just keep bumping into each other. had you still been dating, satoru probably would’ve dropped the box and scooped you up instead, kissing your cold face to warm it up. of course, that would’ve added five minutes to your walk, but it would’ve been better than the tense silence dividing you and satoru right now. 

the wind whistles around you, brushing at your skin and making you shiver with every gust—there’s nothing more you’d like than to go home, plop on your couch and cry while watching the titanic for the hundredth time. 

after what seems like three hundred awkward hours later, you and satoru finally make it to your house. “thanks,” you say quietly, setting down your box in front of the door. 

satoru places his next to yours and slips his hands back into his pockets. he nods and replies, “no problem,” but still doesn’t leave.

you cross your arms, and tilt your head, meeting his eyes hesitantly. “umm, do you need anything else?”

satoru coughs tensely and shrugs. “oh, uh, not really, just—” his eyes drift down to your top, and your face grows warm when you realize you’re still wearing his hoodie. 

“shit, my bad,” you mumble, internally cringing and resisting the urge to say every curse word you know. could this day really get any worse?

well, at least satoru looks equally as embarrassed. he shakes his head and gestures for you to keep it on. “it’s fine, it’s kinda cold anyways. keep it.” satoru hesitates, shuffling his feet before continuing, “if you want something… to remember me by.”

what you say next was done entirely against your will. “do you still love me?” you ask suddenly, not sure what otherworldly force prompted you to do so. you instantly regret it when satoru’s face goes even redder, and you can tell it’s not from the cold the way his blush spreads to his ears.

“i— uh, i mean—”

“answer me, satoru, i think i have a right to know.”

he looks away and mumbles something about needing to go back home, to feed his fish or something (he doesn’t have a fish), and you grab his hand just as he starts to turn away. “please, satoru, i need to know,” you breathe, squeezing his hand harder when he flinches. 

ten silent seconds tick by, but you still don’t let go. so satoru sighs, a soft white puff of air coming from his lips. “yeah.”

your heart breaks again.

“then why did you—”

“because i don’t know how to do this,” satoru says, blue eyes darting all over the place. “i love you, i really do, but i just can’t— i don’t like having thousands of people thinking that i’m only worth looking at if i’m with you, it’s annoying and it pisses me off and i don’t want to accidentally take it out on yo—”

you cut him off with a kiss, ignoring the way he yelps a little in surprise. but thankfully, he doesn’t push you away—instead, his arms instantly wrap around you and pull you closer into his warm, warm chest. satoru’s lips are a little dry, but still minty as ever from the peppermints he’s constantly munching on. he kisses you back like a man starved of affection, and when you two finally break apart, his eyes are just as hungry.

“you idiot,” you whisper, trailing your fingers through his hair as tears prick at the corner of your eyes. “you shoulda just talked to me about it first.”

“i know,” satoru mumbles, looking down bashfully. “‘m sorry.”

“you should be.” you pause, watching satoru’s lips curve into a pouty frown. “i’m sorry too,” you murmur, and he looks up, confused. “i should’ve seen this coming.”

satoru shakes his head and presses his lips to your forehead, lingering for a couple seconds before pulling back. “i missed you.”

“i was gone for less than a day, satoru.”

“oh, so you didn’t miss me?”

“i did,” you admit, exhaling a puff of air when satoru smiles smugly. “shut up, it’s not a competition!”

“yeah it is, but fine, you win,” satoru gives in with a dramatic sigh, reaching down and twining his fingers with yours. his hands, which are significantly bigger than yours, instantly warm you up. “but only ‘cause i don’t want you to break up with me next.”

“i hate you, y’know that?” you grumble, leaning into his side and letting satoru kiss the top of your head. he hums in agreement, reaching out and opening your front door. 

“i’m sure you do, baby. now c’mon, let’s get inside n’ warm up. i wanna make it up to you,” satoru says with a grin, bending over and scooping up both boxes. 

“oh, yeah? how do you plan to do that?” you challenge, going inside first and holding the door open for satoru. once he’s inside, you close the door and instantly get pinned against it by satoru, whose hands are already creeping underneath your clothes. “satoru, your hands are col—”

he cuts you off by pressing his equally cold lips to yours, smiling against your mouth as he tugs at your clothes. “i know, baby. but i’ll keep you nice n’ warm for the rest of the night, i promise!”

[tetsumie]

"𝐘𝐎𝐔'𝐑𝐄 𝐒𝐎 𝐂𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐘" 𝐏𝐓 𝟐

read part 1 here!

pairing: kuroo x reader & bokuto x reader

genre: hurt/comfort

content: the boys call you clingy but they don’t mean it

a/n: hello ahhh it's been awhile since i've posted but i'm trying to get back into the habit of writing again! someone in my inbox had requested me to add bokuto to this list so i tried my best but i hope you all enjoyed this and feel free to stop by my inbox to leave a comment, tell me your thoughts, or just lmk how it's going hehe :,)

kuroo tetsuro

"i'm home," a mumble echoed out into the empty living room.

at the sound of the door opening, you make your way out of your shared bedroom to greet your overworked boyfriend, kuroo.

"hi baby," you replied with a tired smile on your features.

the door closes and kuroo slides off his slacks, loosens his tie, runs his fingers through his hair, and sighs in exhaustion.

"hey."

"have you eaten dinner yet?" you start to ramble. " i can warm up dinner and we could maybe share a meal together?"

"we haven't spent much time together in a while so you know.. i was just thinking... we could do something small together?"

you continue to ramble about how you spent all evening trying a new recipe you saw on tiktok that really fascinated you.

but kuroo is not having it.

all he wants to do is just go to bed and forget the past couple shitty days he's had at work. today, especially, was stressful considering how nothing had gone his way and the higher ups just wouldn’t stop giving him a hard time.

he kept his frustration, tiredness, anger all bottled up for the past couple days and they were all about to boil out.

on top of that, your constant rambling isn't helping. you keep talking and talking and talking and his mind is beginning to get cloudy and his anger is about to boil over.

his voice rises and he finally speaks, "god y/n.. can you just shut the fuck up and stop being all up in my space? you're so fucking clingy just leave me alone."

oh.

you mouth shuts up mid sentence and you're looking down at your feet, too embarrassed to even look him in the eye after hearing his true feelings.

"sorry, i just wanted to spend some time and talk and relax with you..." your voice goes quiet. "you've been out really late for the past couple days so i was just hoping-"

however, kuroo's outburst isn't over yet. if anything, your little comment voicing your concerns seems to have make him a bit more upset.

"yeah, i've been out late because of how suffocating it is here at home with you. god, it's like you just can't take a fucking hint! just leave me the fuck alone!" he says and your eyes go a bit glassy.

"r-right," you say as you're turning around so he doesn't see the tears forming in your eyes. "sorry, i'll respect your wishes and give you your space."

seeing your hunched figure walking away brought him back to his senses.

what the fuck did i just say to them? oh my god.

"y/n wait i'm sorry-" he begins but is cut off.

"kuroo, i think you've said enough tonight."

the sound of his last name coming out of your mouth leaves a bitter taste in his mouth and he knows he's fucked up immensely. the door to the bedroom closes, indicating that you're clocking out for the night and you can't deal with this conversation any bit longer.

kuroo sits himself on the couch with his head in his hands, shaking his head.

what the hell did i just say to them? it's not even their fault... i just... how the hell do i make it up to them?

kuroo walks to the door and places three subtle knocks on the door, begging for permission to enter. he's greeted with no acknowledgement or response.

he turns the knob and to his surprise it opens. there, he sees you fast alseep in your comforter in a fetal-like position. he goes into the closet, changes into his pajamas, and immediately climbs into bed.

he brings you close to his side of the bed, specifically putting your head on his chest. he begins to stroke your hair and places gentle kisses on your head, mumbling soft "i'm sorry's" and "i love you's."

he's praying to whatever deity out there that this would blow over by tomorrow morning or something.

but kuroo wakes up the next morning to his worst nightmare: you're not in bed with him. he feels his blood run cold and he's running the worst case scenarios in his head.

he rushes out of the bedroom to see that you're nowhere in the apartment. he sees a bright colored post-it note stuck on to the fridge with a note scribbled in your handwriting.

"i'm staying at a friend's house for the next couple of days. i just need time to think for a bit. there's some leftovers from last night in the fridge so make sure you eat those.

love u always, y/n"

kuroo's hands shake as he's holding your post-it note.

of course, they'd leave. i treated them like shit and hurt them so badly of course they want to leave. but even after everything, they still love me… i don’t deserve them.

kuroo begins to spiral and the next couple of days aren't any easy for him.

every attempt at texting or calling you has lead to no response. he goes to sleep without you next to him, holding back tears every time. every morning without fail, he pats the vacancy next to him in hopes that you'll be there but to his demise, every time, you're not. work feels even more lethargic than usual. before, he used to look forward to coming home to you but now you're not even at home so what's the point in even trying. counting down the hours until he gets to leave his cubicle has become futile.

i just really want them back. please come back home.

but when he comes home from a pain achingly long day of work, he doesn't find you and his mood plummets even more.

that is until one day, kuroo is able to leave work early where he comes home and hears the familiar noise of the coffee maker brewing. his eyes shoot up from his slacks to look over at the kitchen where he sees you in all your beauty, fidgeting with the knobs on the coffee machine. your eyes both lock and you immediately look away.

kuroo thought you were gone for good. and the fact that you were only a couple feet away from him made his heart swell and his eyes water. there's so much to say but his not a single word is escaping his mouth.

"you want some coffee? i just started a new batch," you finally say to fill up the silence of the room.

he gulps, "sure yeah."

you grab a coffee cup and pour him a fresh cup of coffee and slide it to him across the kitchen counter, avoiding getting too close to him.

too nervous to even touch his drink, he begins to address the elephant in the room, "y/n, i'm so sorry for what i said that night. i had no right to speak to you in the manner."

"it's okay," you say in a curt manner. "i get it."

he shakes his head and tries to get closer to you to convey his feelings but is stopped when he sees you take a step back. his heart cracks.

"no it's not okay sweetheart. i've been so busy with work and i just got super overwhelmed with everything and-"

"kuroo, you know you don't have to make any excuses right?" you interrupt his train of thought.

he's confused now. "excuses? y/n what are you even talking about- "

"just end it with me already... i know you want to," you say, looking down at the fresh cup of coffee in your hands. "you made that very clear."

his world freezes.

the world becomes completely silent.

his mouth is slightly open, caught off guard. he doesn't know what to say.

however, you interpret his silence as him putting down the excuses finally and admitting that he doesn't want to put effort into this relationship with you anymore.

hell, he doesn’t even want this relationship with you anymore.

"right, if you won't i will so it's easier for the both of us. i think we should-"

"don't you dare finish that fucking sentence," he moves close to you all of a sudden and his familiar lingering cheap cologne smell takes up your senses. the gears begin to click in his head before you can respond to him.

kuroo's arms envelop you in his embrace. "i want you. only you. i'm sorry i made you think otherwise."

the tears you've been holding back for the past couple minutes standing in front of him overflow and you feel like the world is about to end.

you push kuroo off you slightly. "i know you've been busy with work and i just wanted to spend some time with you. i never meant to come off as clingy but clearly you thought so so-"

"i'm just a complete douche,” he interrupts. “you were trying to help me out and make me feel better and i was so caught up with work, i couldn't appreciate that."

"i never want to ever make you feel that way again. you never deserved to hear any of that from me and everything i said couldn't be far from the truth. your presence has never been a bother and if anything, coming home to you is the best part of my day.”

“i shouldn't have let my emotions get the best of me and i'm so sorry that it did and that i hurt you in the process. i hate that i’m the reason behind your tears and i’ll do everything to make it up to you to show you how much i love you."

the tears from your eyes continue to flow and he delicately wipes every single one from your eyes kissing your cheek every time without fail.

"are you sure you don’t find me suffocating? you said that you hated being home with me though so i just thought-" you start to say.

"i will spend my entire life reassuring you that it isn’t true. i promise you are never suffocating me and your presence never fails to make me feel better on a shitty day. i will do anything to regain your trust and faith in me,” he adamantly speaks with his hands in yours.

hearing his determined resolve, the tears flow even more.

"i love you so much, tetsu."

"i love you too baby," he smiles and delicately kisses your lips. "now let's go out. how do you feel about going out for dinner? i’ve got a lot of making up to you to do."

"i'll never say no to that."

bokuto koutaro

the msby jackals lost 2-0 sets and the entire team was taking the loss hard but no one as hard as bokuto.

"bokuto-san, what do you think went wrong today's game?" an interviewer asks with his notepad out, scribbling notes.

"er, uh, well, today was just a rough day and i had a tough time keeping up with the opponent's plays today... it just was not a good day."

"i have one more question," the interviewer asks.

"go ahead," he gruffs out.

"you are known for your infamous line shots especially during deciding moments of the game. you missed multiple of these shots during today's game. were you distracted during this game? is it because of your new relationship status or were-"

bokuto is now riled up. who the hell does this interviewer think he is to corner me and bring in my personal life???

"i'm leaving, fuck this shit," he spits out, trying his best to maintain his composure.

in frustration, bokuto storms out of the press conference room, slamming the double doors, heading towards the locker room to grab his stuff but is stopped by you, running after him.

"kou! wait up!" you say from a distance and he stops in his tracks to look at you. he's still internally raging from the provocative behavior of that interviewer and he feels like he just might lose it.

"what do you want," he says in an aggressive manner that catches you off guard.

you’re aware of the recent loss of the msby jackals. you know that's probably taking a toll on his confidence as a player so you're trying to be as supportive as you can.

"you wanna come back to my place? i was thinking we could watch that one disney movie you like and we could bake something together too? what do you think?"

"why do you always want to fucking hang out?" he says in the lowest tone of voice you've ever heard from him.

it sends shivers down your spine.

"huh?" you're just confused at this point.

"why are you so fucking clingy all the time? it's always 'kou come over!' or 'kou let's watch a movie!' or 'kou let's take a nap together!' like don't you fucking get that i have a genuine career that i'm working really hard to be successful in?"

so that's what he thinks of me.

"i know you want to be a pro volleyball player and i want to support you the entire way. i was just trying to be there for you and help you relax..." you trail. "i get today was really rough for you.."

"that's the thing you don't get it, y/n!" he says exasperatedly. "if you did want to be supportive for me and my career, then you would stop being so all up on me and give my space!"

he walks into the locker room, slamming the door, shaking you up.

in defeat, you begin to leave the stadium with tears brimming your eyes. as you get in your car, you put your head on the steering wheel and suddenly, the tears start to stream out.

"i'll give him his space. i'll just stop everything. i'm nothing of importance to him or his life so it's best if i just stop." you convince yourself.

bokuto, on the other hand, is in the locker room, holding back tears of frustration as he punched one of the lockers.

fuck, what am i even doing right now...

"bokuto-san! let's head out for the night," shoyo's voice can be heard before he can be seen in the locker room. "we're gonna go get drinks and dinner at that new barbecue place that opened up."

he looks up from the bench and smiles at shoyo along with the rest of his teammates that are nodding along in support.

"yeah, sure. fine with me," kou responds with a small smile on his face.

as bokuto and the rest of the jackals are out and about, he keeps looking at his phone in hopes of getting a message or something from you but you're completely radio silent after the spat between the two of you.

he knows you both had a disagreement but he thought you knew that he was just frustrated and upset with the game. he didn't think it was a reason to just go silent on him.

he sends a text to test the waters.

kou <3: babe, we're good right?

he puts his phone down and engages back in the dinner with the rest of the jackals.

an hour has passed yet still no response. it's starting to make him fidgety so he decides to spam you.

kou <3: hello?

kou <3: baby wya???

kou <3: where is the loml at :((

kou <3: BABYYYYYYY

kou <3: POOKIE PLS TXT ME BACK :(((

y/n is typing...

y/n: sry i was getting ready for bed.

you sounded distant. you clearly were upset but was it still about the argument? c'mon you knew he didn't mean what he said... right?

kou <3: ITS OKAY BABY! can i come over? i wanna spend the night with u :,)

kou <3: i miss you

y/n: maybe not tonight... i think it's best if we're by ourselves for a bit

bokuto's hair significantly drooped down, seeing as how he got rejected to hang out with you for the night.

as bokuto heads over to his apartment for the night, he stares at the bedroom ceiling with his thoughts. he misses laying next to his baby. that's when he starts to replay everything that went down between the two of you.

he genuinely can't figure out what went wrong.

he prays that this whole thing will just blow over by tomorrow because he misses you incredibly and just wants to spend time with you.

unfortunately to his demise, you kept shutting down all of kou's efforts to come over. you refused to pick up his calls, resorting to half assed texts.

this whole argument was festering and bokuto had to fix it immediately.

you, however, want nothing more than to spend time with your boyfriend but his words kept running through your mind on loop. anytime you would be sitting alone with yourself, his words kept playing themselves on loop in your brain, making you overthink the post couple months you’ve spent together.

has he always thought of me as clingy? have i always been a bother to him? have i always been super annoying in his eyes?

that was until you heard a knock on the door.

you open the door and see kou standing there in a hoodie and a pair of khakis with a large bouquet of assorted flowers in his hands. his eyes lock with yours while yours widen in surprise.

"k-kou! what are you doing here?" you say in surprise.

"what, i can't see my partnet now?" he retorts lightheartedly. "let me in."

too stunned to even reject him, your hand inherently finds its way to the knob, widening the door so bokuto can fit through into your apartment.

he tries to hand you the flowers but you stand there, hands refusing to move from their sides. "c'mon babe, i got them for you! do you not like them? man, i knew i should've gotten the roses instead."

"no no! thank you so much kou.. i'm just surprised that you even got this for me..." you trail off looking away from him.

he sets the flowers on the kitchen counter and tilts his head in confusion. "what do you mean, y/n?"

"listen, i know you don't really like spending time with me and that you feel obligated to but honestly, we really don't have to hang out or anything like that," you begin to say. "i know i can be a lot sometimes and i'm really working on trying to give you space."

that's when it all clicks in his head for him.

"baby, is this about what i said that day in the gym?" he questions.

you turn away, refusing to even look him in the eye because you know the moment your eyes lock with his, the tears will start streaming down your face.

"baby, no, please," he goes over to you to give you the warmest yet tightest hug possible. "i’m also a very clingy person so i should've known how much my words must have hurt you. i've been so stupid to not see how badly my words must have impacted you, my love. i'm so so sorry for saying and acting the way i did. it's unexcusable."

"no kou it's fine i just-" you say but are interrupted midsentence.

"no, y/n it's not," he says, tears brimming his eyes ever since coming to terms with how hurt you must've been feeling this entire time. "i'll do anything to get your forgiveness and for us to just... be close again. i'll do anything, i mean it."

tears are streaming down both your faces and you can't help but form a wobbly smile on your lips. "pinky promise?"

"pinky promise," kou says as he locks pinkies with you and kisses the top of your head. "now let's cuddle because i've missed being near the love of my life."

© tetsumie 2024 all rights reserved 

[tbaluver]

hi!! i was wondering if i could ask for some angst with all the guys ٩(◕‿◕｡)۶

smthing like mc (gender neutral if possible!) going to a mission and not coming back and the guys' reactions to that ?

ty in advance (≧▽≦)

When You Don't Come Back From Your Mission- The Love And DeepSpace Men

parings in order: Xavier x Reader, Zayne x Reader, Rafayel x Reader, Sylus x Reader genre: angst no comfort a/n: hi anonnie! i hope this was okay and that you enjoy ! i'll post a part where mc/ reader comes back from the mission after a long time and maybe that would be a comfort part of this angst reaction (๑>؂•̀๑) i know a couple people from my inbox have requested me to write something about that and i'll get it out soon it's just sitting on my drafts but it'll be out so so soon ദ്ദി ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ ) sorry lovelies i just get distracted a lot any likes and reblogs are always appreciated! enjoy!

⋆｡‧˚ʚ♡ɞ˚‧｡⋆

Xavier:

You and Xavier weren’t assigned to this mission, which was a bummer given how often you two have been always paired for similar tasks. Your extensive training together, countless sparring sessions, and numerous times you two have spent together have created a deep bond and sense of confidence in each other’s skills. Although it was unusual to not be paired in a mission, you both trusted in your abilities and didn’t think much of it.

As he returned from picking up snacks at the convenience store, he walked into the Hunter’s Association office and was struck by the sense of panic that had been overtaken in the room. The frantic energy was evident as he overheard that your team has not given any responses or updates regarding your location. The news hit him like a jolt, nearly causing him to drop the snacks he was holding.

His gentle demeanor shifted to one of deep concern. The usual calmness in his eyes was replaced by a serious and troubled look. His universe felt like it had dimmed, knowing that the brightest star was missing from his grasp.

He demanded immediate access to the latest mission’s location, coordinates, or any relevant information. He insisted that he would take charge of the situation himself and offer no objects as they recognized the intensity in his voice.

He internally blamed himself for not coming sooner. Every path he takes as he travels to find you, only fuels the sense of urgency and concern to find your and ensure your safety.

Zayne:

Zayne has always trusted in your abilities and knew what you were capable of. Each mission, he knew you could handle it with ease and he had faith that you would come back. As always, before he left he would always remind you, “Stay safe and don’t do anything reckless. I don’t want to see you back in my office with another injury.”

Normally, your absences were brief and he would patiently wait for your return, eager to hear the absurd stories of your missions, but this time something felt different. Something he couldn’t quite place. The days dragged on longer than usual and the silence from you was unsettling.

He tried to distract himself with paperwork and tending to patience but his anxiety gnawed at him, thinking of what had happened to you. A mission shouldn’t take this long, especially for someone as skilled as you. 

Every day he would send a text and sometimes they were random. Sometimes they were filled with encouragement or updates about small things in his life, in hopes to get a response from you. However, each message he sent was always left unanswered which fueled his growing concern. He began to doubt if you were ignoring him or if something far worse had happened.

Unable to contain his worry any longer, he drove to your house and knocked on your door unannounced. The minutes stretched into an agonizing wait and when there was no response. His heart that had been warmed by your presence has now gripped by icy fear.

Each day he has desperately waited for any responses and any updates from the Hunter’s Association about your well-being. The longer he had to wait, the more he was determined to join the battlefield himself in desperation to find you again.

Rafayel:

Ever since you departed on your mission, he would be counting the seconds, minutes, and days until your return. It’s something he would usually do when you leave for a mission. Time passed by slowly in your absence and he tried to distract himself by visiting the beach or working on new sketches, hoping to find a spark of inspiration for his next piece. Yet, inspiration was difficult when his greatest muse was missing for a few days

A few days. What began to be a few days stretched into a week and more. His concern grew as your silence and absence in his life persisted. Normally, you would have responded to any of his texts or calls even amid the chaos of your missions. But now, this mission was different. His phone never lit up from any notifications from you and your absence gnawed at him.

His distress was evident. His meticulously groomed appearance had unraveled. His hair was disheveled and his outfits mismatched. The studio that was usually a bright haven of creativity had become a reflection of his inner turmoil. The room was shrouded in shadows, and canvases were marred with erratic splashes of paint and frustrated strokes.

'Missing you comes in waves and tonight I am drowning.'

He was spiraling and grew relentless, digging up any lead and rumor of information about your mission. Whatever happened to you, someone was going to pay. He doesn’t care if the bounty on his head catches up to him. He’ll try to find you no matter what, even if it takes him another 800 years.

Sylus:

He knew you were a skilled Hunter so initially he dismissed your absence as just another routine mission. He assumed he would see you again soon in a couple of days and began making plans for the two of you to relax and enjoy when you returned.

However as days turned into a week without any responses to his text or voice messages, his calm demeanor began to crumble. Your status on DeepSpace hadn’t been updated since the last time you had talked and it never showed that you read his messages. His unease deepened when Mephisto reported that he had been unable to locate you.

The growing anxiety and frustrations were impossible for him to contain. He had tried to rush to the location of your mission only to find no trace of you there. His office became a battleground of his conflicted emotions. He cursed himself for being so careless about you.

Luke and Kieran could only witness the storm of anger and worry from a distance. They dared not to approach him during the moments of his intense agitation. They understand as they miss you as well but they could only wish they could do so much to help find you.

He figures he has to take matters into his own hands no matter the cost. Your little Hunter’s Association could only do so much but many do not understand how much power, influence, and resources Sylus has at his disposal. He doesn’t care if he has to get his hands dirty, he will have to do anything to find his little dove back in his arms again.

[abbyandersxnswife]

Look for the Light ── ᖭི༏ᖫྀ

Canon Abby! x reader; apocalypse au!

Synopsis: You and Abby used to be best friends back in the Fireflies, but after her trip to Jackson, she makes it clear she no longer wants to be friends. If anything, she doesn't seem to even like you anymore. However, her actions keep stating otherwise...

Warnings for; Smut, switch Abby! Follows timeline of TLOU2

Word count: 3.9k

✦ ───────────────────── ✦

You didn't know Abby Anderson.

At least, not anymore.

Now she was just Issac's top Scar killer, another soldier in the WLF, another person like any other.

You arrived at Soundview Stadium a few months ago with a few other WLF soldiers, your patrol unit finally moving in after guarding a post near the Seraphites Island.

You still remembered the day you first ran into Abby again, surprised to see her returning from the lodge up in Jackson.

You didn't know how high she had climbed in the ranks with Issac then, all you knew then was that your old best friend was standing in front of you, walking with Owen and Mel- and you nearly knocked her over when you ran to give her a hug, burying your face in the crook of her neck, never so glad to smell the familiar scent of pine and vanilla. Abby had been strangely stiff, patting you awkwardly on the back like you hadn't spent nearly two years with her in the Fireflies.

Seeing her gave you hope, hope that you two could talk and make up for lost time, finally have some companionship- but that hope was quickly dashed when Abby made it clear to you that she didn't want that at all.

She had said it later on when you two were alone, your things finally unpacked in the tiny room. You had tried to ask her how she was doing, how Jackson went, if she was alright, but it all fell on deaf ears.

"Listen y/n..."

Abby had said, pausing for a moment, rubbing the back of her neck. It was as if she knew this wasn't a good idea, that the next words were words she couldn't take back.

"I don't think we should be friends, I know we used to be but that was a long time ago- I'm just not the person you used to know."

You had been hurt then, hoping she'd give you more of a reason, but Abby was silent, her once bright blue eyes cold and dim.

If Abby Anderson no longer wanted to be friends, if she wanted to pass by you in the hall like you didn't once know every detail about each other - fine.

Fine by you.

-

"Y/n?"

You opened your eyes groggily and opened the door to see Nora standing in the threshold.

"Hey, Issac wants you to report to him- says he's got the details for your latest mission"

You smiled, rubbing the sleep out of your eyes.

"Thanks, Nora, I'll be there in a sec"

You threw on some clothes before heading out, making your way up to Issac's office.

"Hey-"

You pushed open the door and saw Abby, Manny, and Issac already waiting for you, and felt your heart drop into your stomach at the sight of her.

"Ahhh, y/n there you are, now we can get started. A rogue group of Seraphites attacked a patrol yesterday down by the Eastbrook area- I want you guys to go in and sweep to make sure they're all gone. Bring any supplies you find back." Issac pointed to the map on the table for emphasis.

"Y/n, I know you haven't been on a mission with these two before but trust me, they're good. I can get your old crew for a different mission another time"

"No problem Issac, I can work with anyone"

"Great," Issac said before continuing, "When you return, we'll start drafting our plans to invade the Seraphites' Island, we can take the boats and see if we can defeat them on home territory."

Your gaze immediately darted to Abby, wondering what she thought of the news, but she only stared stubbornly ahead.

"Grab something to eat and then head out, take the truck, Manny."

"Alright, let's go guys"

Manny left, and you watched Abby leave as well, trailing behind them, sighing inwardly at the day ahead of you. Today's mission was gonna be a long one.

-

"The Seraphites have been growing bold lately"

Manny broke the silence, seemingly oblivious to the tension that lay between you and Abby.

The back of the truck was snug, Manny and Abby on one side, you on the other. Abby was looking anywhere but your face it seemed, and you sat there quietly, pretending like you weren't sneaking glances whenever you got the chance. After all, this was the closest you had been to her in years.

To be fair, you both equally avoided each other at base- she didn't want anything to do with you, so why would you bother with her?

"Yeah well they broke the treaty, if any of them are at Eastbrook we wipe the site and leave"

The air is chilly when you step out, you adjust your jacket and flip the safety off your gun.

"School looks deserted, but best if we just do a patrol of the site just to be sure. Abby, go with her, patrol the inside, I'll do a grounds check first"

Manny walks off, gun in hand, already entering an old school bus parked in front of the school.

"Come on" Abby says, and you follow her as she prys open the front door.

The interior of the school is a mess, the wallpaper of the walls peeling, desks pushed half hazardly into the hall. Sad shreds of streamers hang from the ceiling, every window smashed, the shards glistening on the floor.

You enter a classroom, pushing the door open with your gun.

Your eyes light up at the greenery inside, the schooldesks covered in a bed of moss, ivy hanging from holes in the ceiling.

"It's beautiful-" You say to yourself, bending down to pick up the remainders of the kids' drawings on the ground. You examine one, it's a picture of a house with what looks to be a horse-

"Can you stay focused? We're supposed to be looking for supplies"

Abby's voice cuts sharply through the silence, the only sound the rifling she's causing by searching through the desks.

You sigh and help her, retrieving a roll of bandages and a few packs of old batteries before moving onto the next room.

Abby finds the cafeteria at the end of the hall, and the old shelves of the cafeteria pantry prove to be quite sparse, with nothing but some old bean cans that Abby takes anyway. She's still acting like you don't exist, so you've got a whole lot of time to examine your surroundings.

You hear a creak while searching through the cupboards and pause, listening for footsteps.

"Do you mind moving a little quicker? Maybe your old patrol did things slower, but I'd like to get back to base sometime soo-"

"Shut up!" You whisper harshly, cutting her off.

Abby looks offended, finally training her gaze on yours, but your eyes dart away to the doors of the cafeteria.

"What?"

Abby asks, watching you.

You hear it again, a second creak. You push Abby up against the wall by the lapels of her jacket, her blue eyes wide with surprise. Her gaze darts down to your lips for a second before her arms come up to pull yours off.

"Woah y/n- what are you-"

A loud bang interrupts Abby's next words, the double wooden doors of the cafeteria slamming open as five Seraphites rush in.

"Seraphites!" You yell, dragging Abby down with you to avoid the gunfire.

Abby breaks out of your hold, punching the nearest Seraphite in the face as you shoot the second. The third Seraphite comes running at you, tackling you to the ground, slamming your wrist against the concrete floor. A sharp pain runs through your arm, and you watch as he kicks your gun out of reach. You grapple on the floor together, kicking as he attempts to strangle you, worried about Abby- before a loud gunshot rings out and the Seraphite's body slumps over you.

Abby stands over you, one hand extended. You take it.

The other two Seraphites lay dead on the ground, bodies riddled with bullets. You brush yourself off, but the ache in your arm is making itself more evident.

"Thanks"

Abby hands you your gun but her brows furrow at the way you cradle your left arm gingerly.

"Are you okay?" She asks.

You feign nonchalance as best you can.

"Yeah.. but my arm might not be"

Abby hesitates for a moment, but reaches out and examines your arm. Her touch is soft, a strange contrast to the stoic way she's been acting this whole mission.

"I think medical should check you out" Abby says, clearing her throat. "Come on we should head back to the truck."

Abby steps back and pushes open the doors. You follow her out.

-

Medical let you go with a brace for the minor fraction on your left arm. You felt miserable, first mission back in the field and injured- you wouldn't be cleared to go on another for at least another few weeks.

You sat slumped against a bookshelf in the library, half hazardly reading "City of Thieves" by David Benioff, ignoring the dull ache in your arm. You'd been doing this for at least a week now, hiding out from prying eyes.

"Y/n?"

Your eyebrows raised at the sound of Abby's voice, and even further when she came over, standing awkwardly in front of you.

"How's your arm?"

Abby asked, shifting her weight from foot to foot.

"It's fine, I guess," You replied. "Just reading to pass the time. Medical ordered I "take it easy" for the next two weeks." You rolled your eyes at the last part. The corners of Abby's mouth twitched, as if she was holding back a smile, but you were sure it was a trick of the light.

"That sucks.. what are you reading?"

Much to your surprise, Abby sat down next to you, one muscular arm reaching over your lap to grab your book.

"Hey, City of the Thieves? I'm reading this one right now- no spoilers"

She held up a finger in warning, and you smiled at her attempt to joke.

"Yeah, yeah" You waved her away.

A beat of silence stretches between you, and you work up the courage to break it.

"So.. what did you come here for? We both know it wasn't just to talk about books"

"I.." Abby looked at the floor, picking at the fabric below. "I wanted to apologize for what I said a few months ago.. and how I've been treating you ever since. I'm sorry"

Abby stops to look up at you, and you take the opportunity to study her. Her cheekbones are a little sharper. There's a healing cut across her cheek that hadn't been there before. Her rosy cheeks, full lips, and clear blue eyes- they're the same.

She's still your Abby, somewhere.

But the hurt you felt then, the lack of company you've had, the loneliness you've felt? It's also there, somewhere.

"Why'd you do it then?"

You ask, and Abby's eyes drop back to the floor. She's silent for so long you're sure she's going to just leave, but she answers.

"I thought I'd feel better after I found the guy who killed my dad in Jackson... but, I don't."

You inhale at her admission, eyes searching for hers as she meets your gaze. The softness she finds in yours prompt her to press on,

"I feel like nothing makes me happy anymore, I still wake up every night from reoccuring nightmares about him- and I've pushed a lot of people away because of how angry I feel. Angry that he's left me, angry that killing the one guy I trained for 4 years to fight to avenge him didn't make me feel better, angry that I've fucked up in every relationship with anyone I care about because of it-"

Abby runs her hands through her hair, smoothing down the stray strands of hair in her braid.

"Y/n, I pushed you away because I care about you. I was being fucking stupid back then- and every time after. I wanted to be near you so much but I felt like I didn't deserve it. I'm not a good person. You deserve someone better than me"

Abby hung her head and stood up, ready to accept whatever you had to say.

"That's up to me to decide Abs."

You said softly, and Abby looked up in surprise. She felt both shock and happiness when you hugged her, and for a second she stood still. Was she allowed to have this? To have you, even for a moment?

Abby hesitated for a moment, before burying her face in your hair, pressing you closer to her.

She never wanted to lose you again.

-

The next few weeks passed by in a blur, your arm healing up just fine. You and Abby spent a lot of time together- eating together in mess hall, going for walks around the crop fields- she helped keep your mind off the itch you felt to get back out.

Lately though, Abby had been acting a little strange, spending more time in the gym, off walking Alice or talking to Manny more than she usually did. You assumed it was nothing though, after all, what else could it be?

"Did you hear? Issac's gonna do a large-scale attack on the Seraphites Island, Manny and Abby got instructed to lead the assault with their chosen squads."

You overhear Nora talking to Mel on your way to mess hall, and your eyebrows furrow. You remember Issac talking about invading the Seraphites back when, but Abby hasn't mentioned it to you at all. Before you have more time to think about it further, Abby arrives and hands you a still warm burrito.

"Hey y/n, brought you breakfast"

Abby smiles at you, and you smile back despite the worry at the back of your mind. She would tell you, wouldn't she?

"Wanna go for a walk?" Abby asks, but you shake your head. You're due for a visit to Medical- you hadn't been needing your arm brace and was sure that with a medical note Issac would dispatch you to assignments again.

The Medical Bay turned out to be quite empty, so you're out with the note clutched in your hand in no time.

You head up to Issac's, past the cells holding Seraphites, and knocked politely on the interrogation door. Issac emerged a dew seconds later.

"Y/n? Oh, a medical note"

While Issac read, you inquired about the rumor you'd heard at breakfast, trying your best to seem casual.

"Abby and Manny are leading the squads in the assault on Seraphites Island right? Would I be able to join them?"

Issac looked surprised,

"You'd have to ask them, they get first pick of who they'd like, then I'll form the rest of the squadrons. Why don't you talk to Abby? I'm surprised she didn't ask you already, I told her about it weeks ago."

Issac's words ring in your ears as you make your way down to Abby's room. You knock on her door for a second before you burst in.

Abby's shirt is off, her dark grey tank laid out on the bed. She's in the middle of drying her wet hair when she sees you come in. You can't help but stare- at her abs, at her white bra, at her unbuttoned dark green cargo pants- and ignore the flutter in your stomach.

You wrench your gaze away.

"Y/n?! What's wrong?"

Abby moves towards you, but you put a hand out. Her cheeks flush when she realizes what she's wearing, or the lack thereof, and bends down to grab her shirt.

"I got cleared from Medical! And uh.. Issac told me you and Manny are leading squads for the invasion against the Seraphites?"

You say, addressing the ceiling.

"Oh.." Abby says, trailing off. She slips on her tank top, stalling.

"I.. I only just found out," Abby lies, "I haven't decided who I want for the squadron yet-"

"You just found out?" You say, angry at her blatant lie. "Don't lie, I know Issac asked you weeks ago"

Abby's tone is defensive,

"Did you ask him behind my back?"

"When were you planning to tell me?" You shoot back, "Were you planning to tell me?"

Abby backtracks at your words, rambling. Her hands raise, like she's guilty of a crime.

"I was- I swear I was, I would have asked you to be on the squadron but your arm was still healing and-"

"Why didn't you just tell me? Forget picking me to be on your squadron, I don't care about that- were you just gonna leave and not tell me? Let me wonder if you fucking died or not?"

Abby's eyebrows raise in alarm, realizing her misstep at identifying what was making you so upset. She sits down, wiping her sweaty hands on her cargos.

"No- y/n, I promise I would have told you, I just didn't want to ruin the peace we were building- and honestly I'm sure I'll be fine, I've done tons of patrols-"

You shake your head-

"Be honest. This is just another way of pushing me away, isn't it? Have you been having nightmares again? Why can't you just be honest with me, what's going on?"

Abby's face breaks, the flicker of conflicting emotions clear to you for a moment. She warrs against touching you, but loses the internal battle. She pulls you closer to her position sitting on the edge of the bed, hands caressing the back of your thighs, unsure of if it's reassuring you or her.

"The nightmares... they never stopped." Abby takes a breath before continuing, "And.. Owen's missing, his patrol partner Danny was found dead," Abby explains, "I keep pushing you away because it hurts that I might lose you. What if Owen's dead? What if that was you next? I don't want to lose you."

Your eyes soften at her words,

"Abs, I'm sure Issac's got people out looking for Owen... and you won't lose me. I may not be as seasoned as you are, but I held my own just fine at the Seraphite outpost for months. Besides, if I go with you, you'll be there to watch my back."

You reach out and cradle her face, stepping a little closer, now stood directly between her legs.

Abby hugged you around the waist, hiding her face in your sweater, voice a little muffled.

"Issac said Owen is a traitor- that he killed Danny to protect.. a Seraphite. I told him it wasn't true, that there was no way he'd do that, that if I could just look for him I'd bring him back- but Issac refused. He wouldn't let me look for him."

Abby looks up at you, a mixture of grief and worry plain on her face. A stray tear rolls down her cheek and you brush it away.

"You're all I have left y/n." Abby whispers.

You crumble like putty in her hands, biting your plush lip as you look at her. Abby felt like she was going to explode.

This whole time, Abby's thought the way she felt about you was one-sided. Even when she was busy pretending to no longer care about you, even when she was staring straight head walking past you in the halls, even that damn school during your first mission together- a bit of her always longed for you.

She had tried to chalk it up to the fact she missed her best friend over the years, that she had a stupid girl crush in her teens, but these past few weeks only served to prove her wrong.

So, when you lean into her, Abby can't resist. She feels like she's lost everything- her dad, Owen- and you're all she has left. Can anyone blame her for acting on what she wants, just once?

Abby pulls you into her lap just as your lips crash into hers, both of you reaching for the other.

Butterflies flutter in your stomach as you kiss Abby, her large hands gently pressing you closer at the small of your back, and your hands tangle in her hair.

You can't get enough of her, hands pulling up her shirt, running your fingertips over her midriff as she shivers at your touch.

"Y/n? We don't have to do anything if you don't want to-"

You cut Abby off with a firm kiss as you push her over.

"Abs, I want to. I want you"

Abby grins at your words, and pulls you down into her for another kiss. Her hands guide your hips as you grind down on her, moaning into her mouth.

Abby thinks this is the closest she'll get to heaven, and flips you both over, her body pressed up against yours.

"I'm glad- I've wanted you for so long" Abby says, kissing down your neck, moving your shirt aside for easier access. You moan as she leaves hickies on your chest, her hands already undoing your pants, fingers dipping down into you.

"Oh baby, you're so wet for me"

Abby's voice is huskier than you've ever heard it, and you feel yourself get even wetter at her words. She rubs your clit with her thumb as she slips two fingers in, fucking you at a quick pace.

"Abs-" You choke out, hands reaching for her.

Abby smiles, love clear on her face.

"You sound so pretty y/n"

You pull at Abby's hair and she sucks at your nipples as she fucks you. You're sure there will be hickies all your neck come tomorrow.

"Fuck, Abs I'm gonna-"

"Come for me"

You come, shaking in her arms. Abby sucks her fingers clean, grinning at the brilliant shade of red you turn in response. You pull her in for another kiss before murmuring,

"Your turn"

Abby sheds her cargos, climbing back onto the bed. You slide your fingers through her wet folds, eliciting a sigh from her as you sink two fingers in, curling them to hit her gspot. You're maintaining a regular pace when Abby speaks up,

"That feels so good- but can you add another?"

You blink, but smirk as you obey her request. You speed up your pace, three fingers disappearing in her dripping cunt quickly, Abby's whimpers growing louder with every thrust.

"Fuck- y/n, I'm gonna come-"

Abby whimpers as she comes, growing tight around your fingers as she grips the headboard above your head.

You smile at her, sucking your fingers as payback for her earlier stunt, and she just laughs, rich and warm.

"I'm glad we both feel the same way about each other" Abby says, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.

"I think we always have" You admit, hands cradling her face before drawing her in for another kiss. Abby's eyes are relaxed, her grin wide. You continue, smiling softly-

"You won't lose me, Abs. You never have, and you never will."

✦ ─────────────────────────── ✦

[rafesfavgirl]

two graves, one gun — r. cameron

sad rafe fic bc i just got my period and i'm feeling extra emotional :')

series: every few lifetimes

❝ so long, london stitches undone two graves, one gun you'll find someone ❞

pairing: bf!rafe x fem!reader

context: after another night of getting coked out and passing out on barry's couch, rafe realizes you deserve better than him and decides to let you go.

words: 1.3k+

warnings: drug addiction, break-up, might make you cry, ANGSTY asl

the sole of your heel taps anxiously against your living room's hardwood floor, as you stared at the time on your phone's lock screen, which lit up with a photo that wheezie took of you and rafe sitting at one of the tables at midsummers last year, looking at each other as if you were the only people there.

8:30 p.m.

your heart aches at the realization that he had forgotten your date again, but the nerves that settle in your stomach win over, as you think about where he probably is.

pushing your weight off the sofa, you grab your car keys from the hooks on the wall, and dial rafe on your way out the door.

straight to voicemail. fuck.

you skip down the steps in front of your house and unlock your car in the driveway to get in, immediately starting the engine to get on your way.

you dial rafe again as you pull into the road—to no avail.

"damn it, rafe," you mutter, eyes switching between the road and your phone as you type him a message.

you: where are you???

when the message doesn't even go through, you let out a frustrated groan. either his phone's dead or it's switched off. you step on the gas to speed up, zigzagging between cars to get there faster.

you pull to an abrupt stop in front of a beat-down house on the south side, and switch the car off before hopping out.

"mrs. country club, what brings you to this side of the island?" barry stands from the porch when he sees you walking towards him, fuming.

"oh spare me the fake hospitality, barry," you tell him. "where is he?"

"where's who?" he shrugs—but you knew he knew what you were talking about.

"don't play dumb with me," you spat, attempting to walk past him. "i know he's here."

he steps to the side to block you from going any further. "maybe so, but it ain't a pretty sight."

"ugh," you manage to walk past him and proceed into the house, with him on your tail. "rafe!"

barry catches up to you and blocks your way again. "hey, i told you-"

"barry, you're really testing my patience here, alright?" you say, refusing to back down. you weren't scared of him—okay, maybe a little, but you weren't about to let him see that. "rafe!"

you push past barry again, and make your way further inside, immediately rushing to rafe, who was passed out face-down on barry's couch.

"oh my god, rafe!" you crouch down beside him, not missing the un-sniffed lines of coke on the wooden table in front of him, and pick up his head in your hands. "baby, baby," you gently pat his face with your hand. "can you hear me?"

"told you it wasn't a pretty sight," barry leans against a wooden post and watches you, making you roll your eyes.

"rafe," you try to wake him up again. "babe."

thankfully, his eyes flutter open, relief washing over you as you let out a sigh. "oh thank god."

"y/n?" his voice is barely above a whisper when his eyes lock with yours. "shit!"

you move aside when he suddenly sits up, searching the couch cushions for his phone. "what time is it?"

"rafe-"

"no, fuck!" he shouts when he realizes his phone is dead, and looks up at barry. "i told you to wake me up if i knocked out!"

"i'm not your keeper, cameron," barry shrugs. "just take your shit and go, a'ight?"

"baby…" rafe turns to you kneeling on the ground beside him, his voice much softer now. "i swear i set an alarm— i was just— i didn't think my phone would die and-"

"hey," you place your hand on top of his, squeezing it lightly to make him look at you. "don't worry about it. let's just get out of here, okay?"

he nods, and you stand up, dusting yourself off as you do.

"i'll meet you in the car, doll," he tells you. "i just gotta take care of something."

—

the car ride back to your house is almost completely silent, until rafe breaks it.

"you look beautiful, by the way," he says, eyes shifting to you.

you glance at him, a small smile on your lips. "thank you."

"god, i'm such an idiot!" he groans, clearly frustrated with himself over the situation. "how many missed dates is that this month?"

"rafe, i told you not to worry about it," you tell him. "it's okay, i get-"

"y/n," his voice is stern now, his eyes burning holes into your skin. "how many?"

you sigh, turning the wheel towards the curb to park the car in front of your house. "four," you answer, switching the ignition off. "that was the fourth one this month."

rafe scoffs and shakes his head, eyes averting away from you. he just couldn't look at you anymore, because he knew that even if you didn't show it, you were disappointed. not only at him, but maybe even yourself for putting up with him.

"hey," you place a hand on his knee, and he glances down at the gesture, before finally looking at you. "it's okay."

"how is it okay?" he asks, eyebrows furrowing. "all i do is disappoint you."

"baby, that's not true," you try to reassure him, but he doesn't buy it.

"it is true," he tells you. "and you don't deserve it."

not knowing what to say, you just glance down at your hand on his knee. "rafe…"

"no," he cuts you off, and places his hand above yours to slowly push it off of him. "i can't keep doing this to you."

letting out a sigh, you adjust yourself in your seat so you're looking at him. "okay, rafe, before you saying anything else— i love you, alright? there's nothing you can do that-"

"and that's exactly the problem, a'ight?" he snaps. "you're never gonna walk away from me yourself! even when i bought this shit from barry after i told you to wait in the car." he reaches into his pocket and tosses the small bag of blow in between the two of you. your eyes shift from it to him, the uneasiness in your stomach only getting worse.

"i have a problem y/n," he tells you. "and it's not the kind you can just 'fix' with love."

"then we'll get you help. we'll do any-" you try to reach out to him, but he resists.

"no," he says, motioning a hand between you two. "this has to end."

the words you dreaded hearing comes out of his mouth in one fell swoop, your heart shattering into a million pieces.

"what?"

"i'm never gonna be the guy you need me to be," he shakes his head at you, and if it weren't so dark outside, you swear you'd see his eyes watering. "and since you can't let go, i have to do it for you."

tears brim along your lower lashes as you speak, "no. that is not your choice to make."

"god, y/n, can you stop making this harder than it already is?" he pleads.

"can you stop acting like it's so easy?" you retort.

"you think this is easy?" he asks, taken aback by your accusation. "it kills me to do this."

"then don't," you say, voice cracking as you reach out for his hands. "we can work through your addiction together, rafe. we'll-"

"that's not your responsibility," he shakes his head at you. "if i'm gonna get better, i need to do it on my own."

you sob, "i— i don't want this to be the end.”

rafe glances down at your hands, before bringing his hand up to cup your cheek.

you lean into his touch, and a single tear rolls down your cheek—one that he wipes away with his thumb.

"i love you so much," he says, eyes closing as his head tilted down against yours. "i'm sorry."

his lips place a soft kiss on your forehead, and just like that, he's gone.

part 2.

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[maretinelli]

SINCE ALWAYS

Lewis Hamilton X physiotherapist!fem!reader

Summary: Lewis and Y/n were like they were attached at the hip. Ever since they were kids, the two of them were there for each other, supporting, caring, and celebrating. But the truth was that they had been in love with each other since they were teenagers, and Lewis's invitation for her to be his fake girlfriend at a wedding made their feelings come to light.

Words: 9.6K+

Warnings: Best friends to lovers, fake dating, cute, a little distressing because they don't say their feelings right away haha, mentions of sex, confessions of love.

Author: English is not my first language, so I apologize for any mistakes that may be made. And I love reading fake dating stories, so I think writing them is cool too hahaha.

MASTERLIST

Since they were little, Lewis and Y/n were inseparable.

They grew up on the same street in London, attended the same schools and shared dreams and insecurities.

Lewis always said that he wouldn't be a pilot without Y/n, because she believed in him before anyone else. And she also said that she only managed to survive college because of the motivational messages and the coffees he delivered to her dorm door when he had time off.

That for her, Lewis achieved the impossible.

When Yin graduated with a degree in physiotherapy and a post-graduate degree in sports physiotherapy, Lewis was keen to help her join Mercedes, saying the team needed someone as talented and dedicated as she was.

Now both living in Monaco, their friendship had only grown stronger. Y/n used to joke that Lewis spent so much time at her apartment that they should split the bills.

He always laughed, saying he only went there for Roscoe, the bulldog who seemed to love the physical therapist almost as much as his owner.

Deep down, both Lewis and Y/n knew there was something deeper between them, but neither of them had the courage to say it out loud.

To Lewis, Y/n was more than just his best friend; she was his rock in the midst of the chaos of his career. She knew exactly what to say when he lost a race, how to cheer him up on his bad days, and most of all, she always believed in him. He loved her smile, the way she wrinkled her nose when she was focused, and even the little scoldings she gave him when he forgot to stretch or took bad care of himself. But admitting that? He couldn’t risk it. Not when she was the most important person in his life.

That afternoon, Lewis parked his car and went up to Y/n's apartment. He had a key, just like she had to his apartment. After knocking on the door and getting no answer, he went inside, calling out to her.

"Y/n? Are you home?" His voice echoed through the apartment.

"I'm in the shower! I'll be right out!" She shouted from the back.

Lewis smiled and gave a quick command to Roscoe, who trotted down the hall with him.

In her room, Lewis flopped down on the bed, taking in the familiar space. The shelf beside the bed was filled with mementos, photos of them together at races, from trips, and even a small 'best friend' trophy that Hamilton had given her as a joke years ago. He started to sort through the things, feeling completely at home.

"What brings your divine presence here?" she teases, calling out loud from the bathroom, her voice muffled by the door.

"Walking around, Roscoe wanted to see you." He replied, chuckling as he heard her laughter in the background.

"Oh, sure. Roscoe, the main reason, right?" Y/n scoffed. "Lewis, do me a favor? Hand me the sweatpants that are on the bed?"

Lewis picked up the piece of clothing and walked to the bathroom door, which opened just a crack. Y/n reached her wet arm out and grabbed the pants, thanking her before closing them again.

Minutes later, she emerged from the bathroom with wet hair and wearing a gray Tommy Hilfiger sweatsuit. Lewis noticed immediately.

"You only wear this when I'm around, just so I think you really like it." He teased, laughing. With a case of her glasses in his hands.

Y/n grabbed the towel she was holding and threw it at him.

"That's a lie! I love this gift as much as I love my job."

Lewis chuckled, setting the towel aside as she took an object from his hand and put it back in its place.

"You're going to break my glasses," she says, as if he were a child.

Lewis, with a quick gesture, took her glasses from inside the box before Y/n took them and put them on her eyes, widening them and taking them off quickly.

"Holy shit, Y/n. You're so nearsighted you're blind." He holds out his glasses to her.

Y/n rolls her eyes and puts her glasses on her face. Not wanting to change them for the lenses she had in the bathroom.

"Huh..." She mumbles, making Lewis smile.

She walks into the bathroom again, picking up the towel Lewis had thrown and holding it out, then starting to brush her wet hair.

"Seriously, what brings you here?" Y/n turns around and sees her best friend leaning against the doorframe of her large bathroom. "Because you're a jerk. I know you. You just show up out of nowhere, start going through my stuff like a child, and have that stupid smile on your face. You're about to ask for my help."

Lewis throws his head back and holds back a laugh.

"Roscoe. I already told you." He tried, but the smile gave away there was more.

"I know... Everything poor Roscoe" She came out of the bathroom, petting the dog that was lying on the rug in her room. "Isn't it, boy?"

Roscoe lifts his head and wags his tail.

As Yin asked if he wanted something to eat and they walked down the hallway from the bedroom, Lewis saw an invitation on the living room table. He recognized the invitation before he even read the name; it was from his sister.

She would be getting married in a few weeks to that scoundrel she called her fiancé.

"Hey, my sister invited you to the wedding too." He takes the invitation and walks to the kitchen.

"Of course. Your family loves me more than you." She teases, making Lewis laugh and roll his eyes.

"It's weird that her fiancé let her call you..." He sits on the counter. "He's very controlling with people."

Y/n fills a kettle to make tea and leans on the counter, looking at her best friend.

"Yeah... he's kind of weird, don't you think?" Lewis nods. "Remember the time we went to visit your mother in London and they were there, your sister seemed so excited to see us, and he had that... idiotic look on his face?" Y/n says, making a face and Lewis laughs. "When your sister told me she was engaged, I already expected that I wouldn't get the invitation because of him, but this caught me by surprise."

"He really is quite strange. The last Christmas I spent with them, he didn't say anything, didn't comment on anything, he just scolded my sister for talking too much and not wanting to give details about their life as a couple." Lewis frowns a little.

He really didn't like his brother-in-law, and had told his own sister as much. But he got a simple reply: 'Stop being a pain in the ass, he's just a reserved guy.'

The pilot deeply hoped that his sister would be happy with the 'reserved guy'. Because if not, things would be terrible for him and the one who would solve that was Lewis himself.

"Actually...I actually came here to talk about this..." He holds up the invitation that was now on the counter.

Y/n frowns, placing two mugs on top of the sink.

"Are you thinking about not going to the wedding?"

Lewis shakes his head. "No, no! It's something else."

"Do you want me to help you choose a tie?" Y/n interrupts.

"No, no!"

"What?"

Lewis doesn't speak, he just looks at his best friend, gathering the courage to make that proposal.

Meanwhile, Y/n had one hand on the stone counter and the other on her waist, anxiously waiting for Lewis to say what was on his mind. But her heart somehow accelerated.

Was he bringing someone with him and wanted to tell them? Was he dating someone and wanted to introduce them to his family? What did she have to do with it? Of course, she's family too. Don't forget.

Y/n had been feeling something for years. Lewis wasn't just her best friend; he was the guy who was by her side through every important moment in her life. He believed in her when no one else did, he opened doors she never imagined she would go through, and he never let her feel alone. The way he smiled at her, the way he pulled her into a hug for no reason, or the way he seemed genuinely interested in her everyday stories made her heart race. But she knew she couldn't ruin it. Lewis was Lewis.

It was her Lewis, and she wasn't about to share it with anyone. As childish as it sounded.

"I want you to come with me to the wedding." He says it as if it were simple, but the question isn't complete yet.

Y/n laughs. Feeling relieved not to hear anything like; girlfriend and Lewis in the same sentence.

"I'm going anyway." She smiled, then placed the tea bags in both mugs. "But if you want me to be your date, we'll tell your sister..." She didn't finish speaking when Lewis interrupted.

"Yes, I want you as my date, but there's one more thing..."

Y/n stops filling the mugs with hot water, frowning again and slowly placing the kettle on the stand.

"Lewis...you're scaring me like this..."

He blinks a few times.

Lewis took a deep breath, feeling the weight of the moment.

"It's my sister's fiancé, Y/n." He began, rubbing his hands on his knees nervously as he spoke. "He has this habit of... well, poking fun at me whenever he can. Every time we see each other, he makes some comment about how 'funny' it is that I'm successful at everything but relationships. As if the fact that I'm single is some kind of personal failure."

Y/n raised her eyebrows, surprised by the tone of irritation in Lewis's voice.

"And what did you do?" She asked, finishing filling the mugs with hot water. And then her eyes widened. "Oh my God, did you punch him?"

Lewis laughs, feeling the weight of the question lift for a few seconds.

"No, I didn't hit him or anything."

Y/n lets out a relieved sigh.

"I told you I wouldn't be single at the wedding. That I'd be bringing my... girlfriend."

She stopped immediately, her hands frozen in midair, the kettle still leaking a faint trail of steam. She slowly placed the kettle back on the stand, turning to face him.

"What?"

He blinked a few times, trying to gauge her reaction.

"That's it. I kind of... made up that I had a girlfriend."

"Okay..." Y/n crossed her arms, waiting for further explanation.

"And I thought..." Lewis hesitated, looking directly at her now, his expression as if he knew she was about to ask something absurd. "That you could be my girlfriend. For a weekend. Just for the wedding."

For a moment, silence filled the room. Y/n frowned, absorbing the request, but soon burst into genuine laughter, throwing her head back.

"That's a good one, Lew. You almost had me."

When she saw that he wasn't laughing along, her laughter slowly died down. "Wait, are you... serious?"

Lewis just nodded, a wry smile appearing on his lips.

"Do you think this will work?" She asked, still a bit incredulous. "Lew, I've practically been part of your family since birth! They know us like the back of their hand. They won't believe we're dating overnight! Both your family and mine!"

Lewis leaned forward, his hands gesturing as he tried to convince her.

"That's where our friendship comes in! No one will suspect because everyone already knows we're close. It won't be that hard to pretend. It's just for a weekend, Y/n. And honestly, it'll save me from hearing the Same speech as my brother-in-law about how I'm doomed to be alone forever."

Y/n narrowed her eyes at him, clearly assessing how crazy he looked.

"Lew... this is crazy."

He shrugged. "Maybe, but you're the only person I trust with that."

Y/n felt her heart skip a beat in her ribcage and she could already feel butterflies starting to fly in her stomach.

"Are you sure about this? Because if we're going to do this, it's going to take a lot more than 'we're best friends' to convince someone."

Lewis smiled confidently.

"So, does that mean you're going to do it?"

Y/n stared at him for a long moment, before taking a sip of her tea and muttering, "I can't believe I'm actually going to go through this madness with you..."

•••••••••••••••••••••••

Travel day.

"I still think this is crazy," Y/n says, looking over her shoulder as she walks in front of Lewis down the aisle of the plane.

He just laughs and puts a hand on her shoulder.

The weeks had passed quickly, and Y/n and Lewis dedicated themselves to creating the perfect story for the relationship they would present at the wedding.

During the nights they spent together, surrounded by papers scattered on the floor and notes in Y/n's notebook, the atmosphere between them oscillated between lightness and something that neither of them could name.

She jotted down the details as he threw out ideas with ease, as if it was all just another one of their adventures together. But for Y/n, every shared laugh and every exchange of glances as they planned made her heart beat faster.

Lewis, in turn, hid his restlessness behind his laid-back charm. The idea of pretending to be Y/n's boyfriend was something he proposed out of necessity, but secretly it was also the fulfillment of a desire that he didn't dare admit even to himself. Being close to her, even in a false setting, made it seem like what he had wanted for so long could, for a brief moment, come true.

"Where was our first official date?" Y/n asked once with the pencil in her mouth, interrupting the silence.

"In that Italian restaurant, after the Monza GP." He answered without hesitation, a slight smile on his lips.

She nodded, taking notes, but felt her face heat up. No matter how much she tried to rationalize, planning every detail made the fake seem more and more real.

Now, two weeks later and his sister's wedding day even closer, the scene repeated itself.

Sitting side by side, Y/n held the notebook on her lap, while Lewis adjusted the headphones around his neck. The two were silent, but tension hung in the air. It wasn't uncomfortable, but it carried something indefinable. Something they both felt, but neither of them dared to mention.

"Okay, last review." Y/n opened the notebook, turning over some marked pages. "First date?"

"Italian restaurant, after the Monza GP." Lewis replied immediately, with a small, smug smile.

"And what did you order?" She arched her eyebrow, testing whether he had actually memorized the details.

Lewis tilted his head, pretending to think. "Mushroom risotto."

"Great, but you have to remember I ordered lasagna." She pointed her pencil at him, laughing.

"As if I would forget. You even made fun of me because I ate half of your dessert afterwards." He laughed, leaning back against the bench and crossing his arms, relaxed.

Y/n closed the notebook. "And how did we start dating?"

Lewis smiles, pinching her nose a little. "I asked you to be my girlfriend at the race in Brazil. It was just the two of us in the Mercedes garage and I realized I couldn't spend another second without you by my side."

Y/n bit her lower lip. Totally hooked by the words Lewis had just spoken, her heart raced, her hands began to sweat, and then she had to look down at the closed notebook on her lap, giving an awkward smile.

"Alright, Hamilton. I think we're ready then."

"We are!" He noticed her rosy cheeks, but he didn't want to say anything, he just smiled and hugged her sideways. "We'll make this work, I promise..."

Just as Y/n would respond, the announcement that the plane was about to take off filled the speakers. She smiles and pays attention to her messages.

Between the detailed planning of the fake relationship and the rehearsals to make sure it all sounded convincing, they were both invested down to the last bit of emotional energy.

However, Y/n decided that she needed to add something extra to make their arrival at the wedding even more exciting.

A few days before the wedding, she sent a message to Lewis’s sister. Claiming to be overwhelmed with last-minute appointments, she said she would not be able to attend the wedding. The pilot’s sister responded almost immediately, sad but understanding. Despite her disappointment, she said she would look forward to seeing Y/n at her new home after the ceremony.

Y/n felt a pang of guilt sending the message, but knew it would make her arrival that much more memorable.

Meanwhile, Lewis, who was well aware of his best friend's dramatic ideas, took advantage of an afternoon when he was at Y/n's apartment, and called her family while she was by his side. During the call, Lewis casually announced that he would be bringing someone to the wedding - someone special, someone they definitely needed to meet.

Even though you already know it.

Y/n, who initially just helped Lewis keep his tone light during the conversation, ended up joining in. Even without speaking directly, she caught his words and laughed softly at the implications.

The mischievous smiles on both their faces were the only clue that there was more than it seemed.

When they arrived at London airport, the air was thick with anticipation. Y/n pulled her suitcase along while Lewis, sunglasses on his face and an easy smile, walked beside her. They exchanged knowing glances when they realized that no one from their family was there to greet them - everyone had already traveled to the wedding venue in the countryside.

It was a relief, as the chaos that could be caused if someone saw them together and the news of their 'dating' spread around the airport was the last thing they needed.

In the parking lot, they rented a large, comfortable car, ideal for the road to the countryside. Lewis took the wheel with his usual confidence, while Y/n organized the GPS on her phone to guide them. The trip started smoothly, but they both knew that the real challenge was yet to come: convincing their families that they were really dating.

The landscape gradually changed, with buildings giving way to green fields and small picturesque villages. However, even with the beauty of the scenery, nervousness hovered between the two as they chatted to distract themselves.

"Okay, important question we forgot to discuss." Y/n looked at him. "What if someone asks why we haven't told the public and your fans yet?"

Lewis, without hesitation, responded as if he had been preparing the answer for years. "Simple. Let's say our relationship is a secret. We don't want to tell the public because we are prioritizing our privacy."

Y/n tilted her head, considering the answer, before nodding with a small smile. "That's a great plan, actually. I think it'll work."

Lewis raised an eyebrow and, with a smirk, added, "And if nothing works, we can just run away and hide in the field. Who's going to find us here?"

Y/n let out a soft laugh, shaking her head. "Great plan B, Hamilton. You really thought of everything."

"Of course!"

Despite the joke, they were both aware of the weight of the situation. Their nervousness increased as they approached their destination, as they knew that both the Hamiltons and the Grays would be there.

It wasn't just a challenge to deceive one family, it was two. They had to be on the same page in every detail, but they also had to hide their own conflicting feelings that seemed to threaten to collapse the theater they had created.

The road to the wedding venue was a picture-postcard scene. After miles of green fields and quaint villages, the large, rustic wooden gate finally loomed ahead, flanked by colorful flowers that swayed gently in the wind. Lewis slowed down, and as he passed through the gate, the sound of tires on gravel echoed down the driveway.

The music playing on the car radio made the moment even more perfect.

They drove down a narrow road lined with tall palm trees that created a natural corridor. The sun filtered through the leaves, casting dancing shadows across the hood of the car. In the distance, several small wooden houses appeared, their rustic roofs and balconies adorned with hanging flowers. A small lake glistened to the right, reflecting the blue sky and surrounded by well-tended lawns.

Lewis stopped the car in front of the group of cottages, the engine turning off with a soft rumble. The sound of gravel under the tires was replaced by birdsong and leaves rustling in the wind.

He noticed how restless Y/n was, her fingers playing with the fabric of her long dress. Without thinking twice, Lewis placed a comforting hand on her leg, smirking.

"Are you okay?" he asked, his voice calm. "If you don't want to do this, we can back out now. Just say the word."

Y/n took a deep breath and gave a nervous but determined smile. "No, I do. I'm just... a little tense. I think it's because I'm officially being promoted from 'best friend' to full-time 'girlfriend'."

Lewis chuckled, squeezing her leg lightly. "You're going to rock. Besides, they already love you. And how could they not, right?"

She rolled her eyes, trying to hide the growing smile. "Are you convincing me or yourself, Hamilton?"

While Lewis got out and opened the trunk to get the bags, Y/n stayed inside the car, observing the little houses more closely. It wasn't long before the excited voices of the families got closer.

The group of people emerged from the entrance of one of the larger cabins, the Hamiltons at the front, followed by the Grays, all smiling and waving.

Lewis's cousin ran up to him first, hugging him warmly. "Lewis! I'm so glad you're here! And... How's Y/n? We were so sad she couldn't come..."

Lewis gave an enigmatic smile, adjusting one of the suitcases on the floor. "Oh, about that..."

Before he could continue, his mother hugged him tightly, grinning from ear to ear. "And who is this special person you wanted us to meet? Are you hiding your game, son?"

He looked at her with a smile that was a mix of amusement and anticipation.

"Actually...you already know her."

At that moment, Y/n got out of the car, adjusting her clothes and walking to stand next to Lewis. Absolute silence took over the two families as everyone's eyes fixed on her, confused and surprised.

Lewis, noticing the nervousness that was beginning to show on Yin's face, gently pulled her by the waist, wrapping her in a side hug. He leaned in a little, whispering close to her ear.

"Relax. You look perfect."

Y/n smiled, the genuine gesture lighting up her face as she returned Lewis's warm gaze.

Finally, surprise began to give way to joy. Lewis's sister was the first to react, letting out an excited scream.

"Wait... you two?! Are you serious?!"

"You said you couldn't come!" One of them says, smiling at Y/n.

"Yeah... surprise..." Y/n smiles, raising her arms. "It was all part of our plan."

They are left open-mouthed with surprise and happiness.

"So Y/n. My sister. Is that the secret person you brought to the wedding?" The physical therapist's brother asks Lewis, still in shock.

Lewis laughs, agreeing with him.

Y/n's parents exchange glances with Lewis's mother. They were surprised but happy with the revelation.

"Why didn't you tell us before?! This is amazing!"

"Oh, you know how the media is, right?" Y/n shuffles her foot uncomfortably on the floor, giving a shy smile.

"Well, I must admit we've been waiting for something like this for a while now." Says Anne, Y/n's mother.

Y/n's father nodded, crossing his arms. "You two have always been so close. It was only a matter of time, wasn't it?"

Carmen laughed softly, excited. "I knew it! I always felt like there was something more between you two, you've been close since you were little. But you hide it well, huh?"

Lewis kept the smile on his face, even though he felt a slight tightness in his chest.

"We thought it would be more fun to reveal the truth when we were together in a special moment like this." He replied, keeping his tone light.

Y/n, although shaken by the families' words, managed to respond in the same tone.

"We wanted to keep things to just the two of us for a while. But with everyone here, it felt like the right time." She says, still hugging Lewis sideways, while squeezing his shoulder even tighter. "And we only ask for one thing, we don't want you to post photos or anything like that on the internet. We're still hiding from the media" Y/n smiles.

"Sure, sure!" Some say together.

"My mouth is a tomb" Y/n's brother says and they laugh.

"We'll keep it just in the family. We promise," Leo, Y/n's father says, placing his hand on Lewis' shoulder. "I'm so glad it's you."

Lewis smiles, his heart clenching even more. For a moment, he wanted all of this to be real, he wanted to admit his feelings to Y/n here and now. But he couldn't.

They both exchanged quick, knowing glances, trying to align themselves emotionally while they digested the weight of those reactions.

The families’ words, so full of affection and anticipation, created a bittersweet feeling. They were happy to see their loved ones so excited, but the weight of the lie hung between them.

Suddenly, Lewis' sister's fiance appeared from behind the group, as they congratulated the newest couple who brought together families that had been close for years, with a smile on their faces.

"Wait, wait, who's our pilot's girlfriend?" As he approached and finally saw Y/n, he stopped in place. His eyes widened as he processed the scene. "Are you... serious?" He looked at Lewis, then at Y/n, and shook his head with a smile of disbelief. "I just can't believe you two are together! Childhood best friends... who would have thought it would end like this?!" He hugged the couple at once.

Lewis frowns a little, not expecting this reaction from the man who made the most fun of his love life.

As the families continued to react, commenting on how they had always waited for this moment, Y/n and Lewis felt their hearts heavy,

The words of support and the looks of joy were genuine, and it shook them in different ways. As much as it was all an act, they were both realizing that the lie was becoming much more emotional than they had anticipated.

The Hamilton and Gray families couldn't contain their excitement as they guided Lewis and Y/n towards the cabin where they would be staying. Excited comments, laughter, and questions flowed in all directions, creating a warm and chaotic atmosphere.

Lewis, carrying the two suitcases, calmly followed the group, occasionally casting an amused glance at Y/n.

She, in turn, answered the questions naturally, following the script they had agreed upon, but her smile revealed a slight nervousness that only Lewis seemed to notice.

"So, Y/n, how did you finally get Lewis to commit?" His aunt asked, laughing.

Y/n smiled, pretending to think. "Ah, it was hard. He's a serious case, but in the end, who can resist, right?"

Laughter echoed through the group as Lewis shook his head, feigning indignation but with a smile on his face.

When they finally arrived at the little house where they would stay, everyone stopped for a moment to admire the place. The people stayed there, only the couple's mothers and Lewis's sister went up the stone stairs with the couple, to the small house where they would stay.

It was a small but incredibly cozy cottage, with light wooden walls and large windows that offered a stunning view of the lake next door. Colorful flowers decorated the path to the entrance, and the soft sound of water completed the tranquility of the environment.

Lewis's sister was the first to speak, handing the key to her brother with a mischievous smile.

"Here it is! You two are going to love this place. And honestly, I knew this day would come. It just takes time..."

"Shut up," Lewis interrupted in a whisper, giving her a sharp look, but with a slight hint of humor. The sister laughed, as she knew her brother had feelings for her best friend.

But the thing she didn't know was that the relationship was fake.

Lewis’s mother interjected softly, turning around with a warm smile. Anne was beside her, smiling too. They were so immersed in a conversation about flowers that they didn’t even hear the two brothers teasing each other.

"We'll leave you alone to explore the cabin. Take the opportunity to settle in and rest a little."

"Thank you" Y/n smiles.

The two of them were silent as they watched their mothers and sister walk away, giving each other expectant looks and knowing smiles before disappearing down the path.

When the last one disappeared from sight, Lewis handed the key to Y/n.

"Your turn," he said, with a smile.

Y/n took the key and opened the door, revealing a spacious and tastefully decorated room. The bed, large and comfortable, was adorned with a cute kit, a bottle of wine, two glasses and chocolates and rose petals spread across the entire surface. The windows looked out over the lake, with the reflection of the sky creating a soft, almost magical glow on the water.

Y/n chuckled as she saw the decor, walking slowly around the room as she took in the details.

They really went all out for a couple in love...

She thought, amused by the irony of living this with Lewis.

Lewis followed close behind, dropping his bags by the door and chuckling at the sight of the room. "Well, they've definitely gone overboard on the romantic thing. I think they're expecting an engagement announcement tomorrow."

Y/n chuckled, giving him an amused look.

"You think? I think we forgot to include that in the script."

Lewis watched her reaction, the sincere smile that lit up Y/n's face, and took a few steps towards her.

"You know we can deny anything at any time, right? You just have to say the word, and we'll be done with it.

He was so close that Y/n felt her heart race. When he reached up to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, the gentle touch made her breath catch for a moment.

Y/n sighed lightly, trying to regain control, and gave a nervous smile. "And miss the chance to see more reactions from our families? No way."

They laughed together, but deep down, Y/n knew the truth was different. Being there, pretending to be something more with Lewis, made her feel something different, as if, for a weekend, she could experience what it was like to have him not only as a best friend, but as something more.

The thought made her look away for a moment, while the smile remained on her lips.

They came back to reality when several knocks on the door interrupted the silence, with two soft children's voices.

"Uncle Lew! Uncle Lew. We heard you're dating Aunt Y/n!!" The knocking continued, making the fake couple inside the room laugh. "Open up! Open up! We want to see her!"

Lewis and Y/n laugh, walking away and the pilot walking to the door.

"Are we going to have to lie to your nephews too?" She whispers, walking to the door as well, a pout on her lips.

"Unfortunately, dear." Lewis smiles and then opens the door, with the two children entering and running to hug Y/n. "Hey, what about me?"

The children laugh.

••••••••••••••••••••

Next day.

Lewis and Y/n's first day as a fake couple in the presence of both families was a constant test. Between forced smiles that gradually seemed natural and rehearsed responses, the two needed absolute harmony.

Early in the morning, while they were having coffee together with their families, someone asked how they divided up the house. Y/n hesitated for a second, but Lewis, without missing a beat, replied that she was responsible for meals and he was responsible for breakfast.

She gave him a surprised look, but soon joined in the joke, laughing and saying that he overdid it with salt. The lightness of the moment drew laughter from her relatives, but inside, their hearts were racing.

Later, while walking in the countryside with their cousins and childhood friends and Lewis's sister, the subject turned to their first kiss.

Y/n tried to hide it, but Lewis held her hand and gave her a knowing look. He began to describe exactly how they had agreed weeks before, even adding something extra as he spoke excitedly, as if it were real. She followed his story, laughing inside at how he could tell something so convincing.

There were also nervous moments, like when Y/n's grandmother suggested, "You guys should start thinking about having kids. With a connection like that, the kids would be beautiful!"

They both laughed nervously, trying to change the subject, while feeling the heat rise to their faces.

But as challenging as it was, spending the day together as a fake couple also made them realize how much they knew each other and how compatible they were.

The shared laughter, the exchanged glances and the ease with which they dealt with delicate situations only reinforced what they were both afraid to admit: this was starting to feel frighteningly real.

Night came, and in the cabin, Y/n finished applying her makeup in front of a mirror while Lewis sat on the edge of the bed, adjusting the laces of his white sneakers.

The room was lit with a soft light, and the open curtains revealed a view of trees lit by small lanterns scattered across the field.

"I finally got John to stop interrogating me." Lewis commented casually, looking at Y/n in the mirror.

She smiled as she put away her lipstick. "That's because you basically implied that I won you over with my irresistible charm."

"It wasn't a lie," he whispered, looking at the floor with an amused smile.

Y/n stopped for a moment, she had listened. And then, he pretended to roll his eyes to hide the blush he felt. And he decided to ignore it and make another comment.

"But you know what..." She puts her makeup back in her bag. "Today at lunch he was looking at us like he knew something was wrong."

"John is suspicious by nature," Lewis said, standing up and releasing his braids from their updo. "But I think he's starting to accept it. Maybe he's even jealous." He stops at the mirror for a moment, next to Y/n, to fix his braided hair.

"Yeah, because dating you is a prize," Y/n joked, winking at him.

"And isn't it?" he retorted with a smile.

She rolls her eyes, pushing his silhouette away, making the pilot laugh.

"Come on, Hamilton! We have to leave now, so we don't get late." She walks to the bedroom door.

It should also be noted that it was their first night sleeping in the same bed as a fake couple, a fake couple. But still a couple.

Although it wasn't the first time they shared a bed, the circumstances were different now. As children, sleeping in the same bed was something innocent, nights at each other's houses after playing late, or even family trips where improvising a shared bed was part of the fun.

More recently, the comfortable intimacy was still there, as in the time when Mercedes forgot to reserve a room for Y/n during a Grand Prix. Without hesitation, he offered his room, and in the absence of sofas or extra beds, they ended up sleeping together. At the time, Y/n jokingly piled pillows in the middle of the bed, saying it was: "A security barrier to keep you from invading my space, Hamilton." He laughed, but respected it.

Now, though, things were different. They weren't kids anymore, nor were they innocent best friends sharing a space out of necessity. There was a new layer between them—the game they were playing, pretending to be a couple, and the pent-up feelings that seemed to be growing with each interaction.

When they were ready, the two left the cottage where their room was, and walked through the illuminated field. The dew-wet grass shone under the lantern lights.

Lewis, realizing that they were about to enter a place filled with happy looks from both families, stopped and extended his hand to his crush.

"Hold my hand. There's no point in us arriving separately."

Y/n frowned a little, but soon intertwined her fingers with his. The touch was warm and comfortable, and even though she knew it was part of the plan, she felt a tightness in her chest.

"You really take this seriously," she teased, giving the pilot's hand a gentle squeeze.

"I just want to look convincing," Lewis replied with a smile, but his eyes betrayed a deeper feeling. And Y/n noticed.

As they walked hand in hand, Y/n couldn't help but wonder what it would be like if this wasn't a theater.

The large space where the bride and groom's dinner would take place was stunning. Shades of cream, green and gold decorated the space, with tall floral arrangements on round tables and small lights hanging from the ceiling, creating a magical atmosphere. The colors of the wedding invitation were present in every detail, from the napkins to the chairs decorated with bows.

Y/n was wearing a long black and white crochet dress, with firm stitches so that no part of her body was visible and this highlighted her curves in the right way, matching perfectly with her heels. Lewis, on the other hand, looked impeccable in a formal suit, a white button-down shirt, dress pants and a pair of classic sneakers on his feet.

When they walked in, hand in hand, all eyes turned to them. Family and friends of the bride and groom, who had arrived that morning, began to smile.

"They're perfect together," Hamilton commented.

"I always knew this would happen," Y/n's younger brother whispers to his girlfriend.

Y/n felt heat rise on her skin as she heard the comments, while Lewis lightly squeezed her hand. They both exchanged quick glances, almost as if trying to confirm what the other was feeling.

"They really look like a couple in love," Anne, Y/n's mother commented to Carmen, who agreed with a proud smile.

Y/n and Lewis heard enough to feel the weight of the words. The comments were sweet, but they carried with them a truth that they were both beginning to face and for a moment, the desire to confess how they felt grew.

However, silently, they both decided to keep everything as it was, at least for now. After all, the confusion in their hearts was already enough to deal with without adding new layers to that delicately constructed lie.

Lewis and Y/n walked through the room, hand in hand as if they were a long-time couple in love, until they found their designated table. There were Carmen, Y/n's parents and brothers, beyond the space reserved for them.

The conversations at the table died down for a moment as the couple approached, and everyone's eyes turned to them.

"You both look radiant tonight," Anne commented with a warm smile. "As if the paths were set in stone from motherhood."

Literally. They were born in the same maternity ward, with Y/n arriving into the world a week apart from Lewis.

Carmen, sitting nearby, nodded as she studied the two. "Seriously, son, I've never seen you this happy. And you, Y/n, look stunning. We're lucky to have you officially in the family now."

Y/n felt like she was going to cry at Hamilton's mother's sweet words, while Lewis, always confident, just thanked her with a smile.

However, the look they exchanged immediately afterwards was full of meaning, a half-smile of complicity, mixed with something that not even they themselves could admit.

A short time later, Lewis's sister, who had been walking around the room greeting guests, stopped behind him, placing her hands on her brother's shoulders.

"I knew this moment would come. You've finally officially united our families, and not just because of your friendship. I'm so happy." With a wide smile, she looked at Y/n.

The families around laughed, agreeing with comments of joy and satisfaction. Y/n gave Lewis a quick glance, and he returned the gesture, both smiling sideways, with the pilot's hand on her knee, as a comforting way, but with their thoughts racing.

As comforting as it was to see the happy families, the weight of the lie and the intensity of their own feelings were starting to become difficult to ignore. What had once been just planned theater was becoming something more complicated and emotionally challenging.

Dinner was lively, with impeccable dishes being served while conversations flowed around the table. However, for Lewis and Y/n, the evening began to become a mix of fun and tension. They talked, laughed and even told the story they had rehearsed weeks before about how they started dating, when someone at the table asked.

As the glasses of wine and champagne were emptied, the emotional barrier between them seemed to disappear. They both knew they were drinking more than they should, perhaps as a way to numb the feelings that were becoming more and more evident.

Between laughs and long glances, they let out small gestures that seemed genuinely in love, even though they knew they were exaggerating for the audience around them. But deep down, maybe they weren't just pretending.

By the time dinner was over and the music started playing, Lewis and Y/n were both drunk. He pulled her closer, mumbling something about how beautiful she looked that night, while Y/n, unable to contain herself, laughed and replied something equally affectionate. They were both openly flirting now, under the guise of drinking and pretense.

But of course, with all the alcohol they had consumed, something was bound to get out of hand.

Now, hours and hours after dinner was over and everyone had returned to their rooms, the fake couple's room was filled with mess, pillows, cushions and clothes they had used before, thrown on the floor.

Y/n was wrapped in a blanket, staring at the wall in front of her. The large tattoo she had on her collarbone was on full display, shining beneath the dim light of the room, while her hair was a mess. Because the pilot made sure to run his fingers over every inch of her body.

Lewis, on the other hand, had the blanket around his waist, his arms crossed on his lap, while the tattoos on his bare chest were also exposed. He looked at the clothes scattered on the floor, absorbing everything that had happened in the last few hours and how he had had sex with his best friend. I mean, the love of his life. Of course.

They were still slightly drunk, but they were sure to remember this event the next morning.

"That was crazy," Y/n says quietly, turning her head to look at Lewis.

The pilot turns around, but still leaning against the headboard. "Crazy. But good...very goooood. Great!" He emphasizes and Y/n widens her eyes, slowly nodding.

"Definitely," she says, pulling the sheet up. And biting her bottom lip.

They look back where they were looking before, until Y/n turns to him, with a questioning look now.

"Do you want to go again? I feel like I'm still a little drunk to ask the question."

"Of course!" He says without a second thought, pulling her into a hot, passionate kiss.

•••••••••••••••••••••••

Lewis's sister's wedding day.

Y/n woke up with the first rays of sunlight hitting her face. She opened her eyes and felt an arm around her waist, while a hand was stuck in her hair and her legs were tangled with Lewis's.

Then she lets out a sigh, remembering the night before. She had slept with Lewis. And not in the lie-down-close-your-eyes-and-sleep sense. In the sense that they had sex. Drunken sex.

An involuntary smile left her lips, even though she thought it was wrong.

She got up quickly, trying not to make any noise so as not to wake Lewis. The wedding was late in the morning, and the women of the families had already arranged to get ready together.

She put on whatever clothes were in her suitcase and left, ignoring her dress lying on the floor next to Lewis's discarded clothes as well.

The pilot woke up some time later, alone. Y/n's side of the bed was already cold. He ran his hand over his face, feeling his head a little heavy, and looked around. Their clothes were thrown on the floor, a reminder of the night before. He lay back on the bed for a moment, staring at the ceiling, as flashes of the night before passed through his mind. Y/n's laughter, the intense looks, the touches, the kisses.

The line between fake and real had definitely been crossed, and that left something undeniably different between them.

And Y/n seemed to do her best to avoid Lewis.

Whenever he came near, she found an excuse to leave, her face flushing slightly as she remembered what they had done. Despite her calm exterior, inside, she was a whirlwind. The idea of being so close to Lewis now made her nervous, not in a bad way.

While she was being made up, Lewis finally found her alone, waiting for the make-up artist, who had gone out to get something. He walked into the room with a somewhat hesitant but determined expression.

"Hey!" He smiles.

Y/n opens her eyes and leans back in her chair, seeing Lewis there. And then, her heart starts to race faster and faster.

"Hey!" She smiles, trying not to look nervous.

"The day dawned beautiful today for the wedding," he says relaxedly, trying to make the tension go away after what happened last night.

"Yeah. Your sister must be happy with the sun coming out." Y/n looked at the green robe she was wearing and lightly poked the fabric.

Lewis nods and looks at the woman. He sighs deeply before finally speaking.

"About yesterday..." He began, looking at her.

"We had too much to drink, Lewis. It was crazy," she says quickly, but never hinting at regret.

Lewis shakes his head. "Sure, that. It was crazy." He says gesturing with his hands.

The two remain silent for a while, looking at each other and remembering what they did last night. They would confess some time later, that that night was the best they had in their lives.

"Okay. I'll be going then. You need to put on your makeup and I need to get ready too." Lewis says and Y/n nods, swallowing hard. "See you at the wedding."

"Sure, sure. Yes." She says trying not to sound nervous, but clearly failing. Lewis smiles at that.

"See you later, doll" He winks, leaving Y/n completely dizzy in the room.

She leans back in her chair again, sighing and biting her lower lip as her mind races through memories of Lewis roaming her body.

They both knew that this was more than just the effects of the drink. They had crossed the line between friendship and theater, and that was something they couldn't ignore.

When the wedding finally arrived, the setting looked like something out of a fairy tale. The altar was set in an open field, surrounded by flowering trees that swayed gently in the wind. White chairs were arranged in perfect rows, decorated with small flower arrangements that matched the palette of the invitation.

The guests took their seats and the groomsmen and bridesmaids walked down the aisle. Lewis, as his sister's best man, walked in with one of his cousins, flashing an easy, confident smile.

However, as he passed by the row where Y/n was sitting, his eyes found her. The passionate look he gave her was impossible to ignore. Y/n, feeling the impact of that, smiled back, showing a look full of affection and love. She winked with one eye and Lewis laughed lightly, walking to the altar.

The bride appeared next, causing the guests to gasp. She looked radiant, and the groom, visibly moved, was waiting for her at the altar. When the ceremony began, the environment was permeated with an almost palpable energy. Y/n, sitting among her family, couldn't hold back her tears as the vows were exchanged. She wiped her tears casually with her fingertips, but Lewis from the altar noticed and couldn't help but smile softly.

During the ceremony, Lewis and Y/n's eyes met more than once. It was as if they were having a silent conversation, full of feelings that could not be expressed there. At a moment when the vows were especially emotional, Lewis leaned a little to the side and, almost imperceptibly, whispered:

"I love you."

The words were spoken with such sincerity that they hit Y/n hard. She felt a lump form in her throat as more tears welled up in her eyes. Pretending to still be emotional about the ceremony, she lowered her head to hide it, but her heart was beating fast.

And of course, when the bride and groom accepted the engagement, Lewis couldn't help but imagine what it would be like if it were him and Y/n there at the altar. She in a beautiful and expensive white wedding dress, with tears streaming down her face as he placed the ring on her finger and declared all his love for the girl - now woman, who he had loved since they were children.

And they both knew that this was beyond acting, and maybe it was finally time to stop pretending.

The bride and groom’s reception was as enchanting as the ceremony had been. Under a blue sky with clouds, a vast open space in the countryside hosted the celebration. Rows of flowers hanging from wires softly highlighted the surroundings, creating a magical atmosphere. In the background, the lake reflected the brightness of the sun’s rays.

Y/n was deep in conversation about her work with some of Lewis’s aunts and cousins. They seemed fascinated by her stories and asked questions, while she responded with a warm and excited smile, gesturing to emphasize her points.

Meanwhile, Lewis watched her from afar, with a soft smile on his face. The pilot approached and lightly touched her arm, catching her attention.

Y/n turned around, smiling when she saw him.

"Hey, could I borrow my Y/n for a little while?" He asked, his voice light but his eyes filled with something deeper.

Lewis's cousins smiled knowingly and nodded quickly. "Sure, we'll talk later, Y/n," they said, leaving the couple alone.

Y/n agreed smiling, watching them leave until they were far away from her and Hamilton.

The Mercedes team physiotherapist turned her gaze to Lewis, the smile still on her face, but her heart already starting to race as she noticed how stunning he looked in that impeccable outfit.

She sipped some champagne from her glass and joked, "What do you want from me, Sir Lewis Hamilton?"

He rolled his eyes slightly, laughing.

"I want to talk to you," he said, his voice lower, almost hesitant, but carrying an intensity that made her alert.

She nodded, her eyes scanning his face as he stepped closer. His unmistakable scent invaded her senses, and Y/n felt a warmth grow in her chest.

"But... away from people," he added, giving her a quiet smile.

Y/n frowned slightly, puzzled, but tried to appear calm. She set the glass down on the nearest table and followed Lewis. He held her hand firmly, his fingers intertwined with hers, gently pulling her through the flower field.

They walked towards the lake, where a small wooden bridge spanned the serene water. The structure was decorated with small arrangements of white flowers, reflecting in the lake like stars dancing on the surface.

Y/n felt her heart beating fast, both because of the scenery and because of Lewis's presence beside her. He stopped in the middle of the bridge, slowly letting go of her hand and leaning against the railing, looking out at the water. She stood next to him, leaning against the railing too, feeling the cool breeze caress her skin and his eyes meet hers.

"Why did you bring me here?" She asked, her voice shaking slightly, trying to maintain her composure, but already beginning to imagine what would come next.

Lewis took a deep breath, his gaze so sincere and vulnerable that it made Y/n hold her breath. He knew it was now or never.

His gaze was more intense than ever, as if he was gathering the courage to say something he had been holding back for a long time.

"Lewis??" She asked, but he held up his hand, as if asking for a moment to speak.

"Just listen to me for a minute, okay?" He took a deep breath, looking away from the lake for a moment before turning back to her. "I've thought of a thousand ways to say this. Actually, I've tried not to say it. I've tried to convince myself that this was a stupid idea, that it could ruin everything, but..." He paused, laughing humorlessly. "After last night... I can't pretend it's not happening anymore. I've never been good with words when it comes to you. But you've always been more than just my best friend, Y/n. Ever since we were kids, I felt something about you that I didn't know exactly what it meant, but then when we reached adolescence, I realized that I loved you. I loved you as more than a best friend... I was already crazy about you. And I tried to put it aside because I thought it was the right thing to do, because you were too important to risk. But now... Now I'm here, in the middle of this bridge, and all I can think is that if I don't tell you how I feel, I'll regret it for the rest of my life... Y/n Gray, I love you. With every fiber of my being, I love you. And I'm not saying this as a friend, I'm saying this as someone who wants to cross that line, who wants to be your boyfriend, fiancé, husband and father of our babies. And if I'm messing this up, just slap me in the face and yell at me, and I'll understand too..."

Y/n laughed at the last sentence and bit her lips, as if trying to stop the tears from falling violently from her eyes. God, she had been waiting for this confession for years, and lately she thought it would never come, but here they are, declaring their love for each other.

"I'm not going to slap you or yell at you." She laughs, wiping away her tears. "On the contrary, I'm going to tell you that I love you too. Because yes, I love you, Lewis Hamilton. I love you beyond friendship, beyond everything we've been for 35 years. I love you romantically, and I also hope to be your girlfriend, fiancée, wife, and mother of our babies." She smiles, now with Lewis smiling and tears falling from his eyes. "And I confess that I tried to ignore that too. For years. I convinced myself that you deserved more, that our friendship was enough, that it wasn't worth risking." She laughs softly, the sound almost sad. "But I think last night took away all the excuses I had... That we had."

He lifted one hand, cupping her face gently, his thumb tracing a gentle path across her cheek.

"So maybe... we can stop risking everything by just being friends."

She laughed, a lone tear escaping, and Lewis quickly wiped it away. "Is that your way of saying you want us to stop pretending?"

"It's my way of saying that I don't want to pretend with you anymore," he replied, leaning in slowly.

Y/n closed her eyes, her heart beating so fast it seemed to echo in the silence around her. And then, his lips met hers, warm, soft and full of everything they had kept for years. It was a kiss that didn't need words, a different kiss than the one from the night before. Less drunk and rushed.

Y/n smiles between the kiss, when she feels Lewis's hand move further down her back.

When they pull apart, Lewis sees Y/n's loving gaze. "Well, is it too early to ask you out for real?"

She smiles, shaking her head.

"Okay then," he kneels down. "I don't have a ring here right now, but Y/n Gray... Will you date me? Officially? No rehearsed lines or plans in a notebook?"

Y/n laughs, crouching down a little. "Yes, Lew. I accept!" She smiles.

Lewis quickly gets up, picking Y/n up and spinning her around in the air, giving her several little kisses on the face before placing her on the ground and pulling her into a tight hug. With Y/n's face buried in the pilot's neck.

"You know what?" Lewis asks and Y/n questions. "The sex yesterday was good!"

She stands up, looking at him in disbelief, while having a mischievous smile on her face. Y/n lightly hits her boyfriend's chest.

"Hey, can you stop ruining cute moments like this with dirty comments?" She teases, making Lewis laugh and pull her into his embrace.

And after years and years, the two finally felt complete and with a weight off their bodies. They finally belonged to each other.

[thischarmingmandalorian]

I Wanna Ruin Our Friendship

Couple, Bar Chapter 1

Summary: After you help Joel with a work project, he takes you out for drinks. When the bartender mistakes you for a couple, his brain short circuits.

Pairing: Single Dad Neighbor!Joel Miller X Reader

Warnings: Joel thinking being mean is flirting, alcohol, grinding on strangers, getting groped in public, no-no words. In my mind there's an age gap (10 years max) and I envision a mid-40s Joel, but I don't think it'll ever become apparent.

Word Count: 2.3k

Notes: Formatting on mobile is not for the weak, y'all, so if this looks like ass I'm sorry. I don't know what a contractor does. Song mentioned is Jenny (I Wanna Ruin Our Friendship) by Studio Killers. Full playlist is linked on the master post for this series (which I'll learn to link all together soon I promise I'M OLD, OK?!) Also I promise I have an English degree but if I read this one more time I'll lose the nerve to post it so ignore any mistakes I missed. Anyway love you bye.

While you weren't on your neighbor Joel's payroll, every now and then he'd knock on your door and sheepishly ask to borrow your "eye for design," which was Joel talk for "I need help knowing what handles look good on these cabinets I'm building and every other person in my life is busy."  

You and Joel had been neighbors for the better part of 5 years and had become relatively close in that time. If you were being honest with yourself, the first day you met you might have fallen in love, but since immediately jumping into a relationship with a newly-divorced single father wasn't on your five-year plan, those feelings were buried, albeit not always successfully.

Joel was charming, kind, and... Southern.  And while these were all things that made you head over heels for him, they were exactly what made it difficult to interpret his feelings for you. Were he and Sarah baking you Christmas cookies and hand delivering them to your door because he too had a crush, or was he just being neighborly? Was he grinning every time he said hello to you because he was a nice guy? What were you supposed to make of that one time, on his couch for movie night, when his hand lingered a little longer than normal on your thigh? You had no idea, and for the sake of your friendship, you were content not knowing.

On this particular day, Joel needed help matching paint colors to flooring samples and might as well have been color blind. He was building a house for a newlywed couple and their wishes for, as Joel put it, "some 1960s Brady Bunch bullshit" aesthetic meant nothing to him. You had spent the better part of an hour helping Joel match swatches of green and orange in ways that he had previously thought impossible, and as a thank you, he offered to buy you a drink at the first bar you spotted on the way home.

The first bar you spotted happened to be an almost-literal hole in the wall, but the packed parking lot indicated it was a place worth visiting.  Joel opened the door, beckoning you through the threshold ahead of him, and you're hit with a wall of smoke and the bump of a local dj working through his set. 

Luckily most of the people at the bar had already started drinking and were congregated in the middle of the tiny dance floor, making it easy to find two seats. Joel flagged the bartender over and ordered for the both of you, handing his card over to start a tab.

"Got you a beer, this place doesn't look like they'd make a good margarita," Joel shouts over the music. 

You smile, leaning in close to thank Joel. "I appreciate the forethought! Send me a Venmo request for what I end up owing you," you gesture to the frosty bottles that get put in front of you.

Joel tuts and waves his hand between you two in a noncommittal gesture. He leans in close to your ear instead of shouting this time, "consider it payment for your help today. When that couple told me they wanted their house to be 'midcentury Palm Springs chic' I knew you'd know what they meant. The wife kept sending me links to her Pinterest board, whatever the fuck that is. I was too scared to click them because..."

"Because you're fucking old," you finish, barking out a laugh at the frown that Joel gives you.

After one beer turned into three, Joel starts to open up. Despite his gruff exterior, you know he cares and is interested in your life, even if it takes some alcohol to get him asking about it.

"Have you started dating yet?" The question catches you off guard, your eyes growing wide. "What? You've been in town for five years now, it's high time you start putting yourself out there. A pretty girl like you should have no trouble finding a man."

There it is again. Is Joel just being nice calling you pretty? Or is he fishing for something more?

"Have you started dating?" you counter, raising an eyebrow, nodding when Joel shakes his head. "I'm too busy, Joel. I'm…"

"'Focusing on my career,'" Joel finishes for you, having heard it all before.

You roll your eyes. "Why are we talking about this?"

Joel smirks and cocks his head to your beer, the label in the process of being peeled completely off. "You've peeled the label off every drink you've had tonight."

"Oh…kay?"

Joel shrugs, "if Tommy were here he'd say you're pulling the labels off because you're sexually frustrated." He makes a face as if to say 'but what do I know?'

You raised an eyebrow at Joel. "You of all people should know not to take what Tommy says as fact. And you're one to talk; you live across the street, I'd notice if women were coming over. And they're not. You're going through a dry spell, Miller, same as me." You empty your bottle, stuffing the label down the neck and waving the bartender over for you and Joel to order one more round.  Joel tries to think of a witty comeback, but he knows you're right. 

You watch the bartender open your tab on the till behind the bar and chuckle when you notice what she's titled it: at the top of the screen, in bold letters, "COUPLE BAR."

You tap Joel's bicep, pointing to the screen, "look at that, Miller," you shout over the music, "she thinks you and I are a couple."

Joel looks at the screen himself, eyes suddenly going wide. You raise an eyebrow at him, confused as to why he isn't just chuckling at the bartender's misunderstanding, but your expression turns to one of anger once Joel regains use of his brain and the only thing he can think to say is, "... ew?"

You hope you just misheard him over the loud music, but as Joel started to sputter out an apology, looking horrified at what he had said, you realize - a stranger thought you two were dating, and Joel thinks that's gross. You weren't interested in hearing him trip over his words while he tried to backtrack, and you desperately needed a distraction so you didn't start to cry.  You wave your hand in front of Joel's face, telling him to save it as you grab your beer and push past him to the dance floor.

This is definitely not your scene, the middle of a smoke-filled bar on the side of the road in the middle of nowhere, but you make the most of it, taking a swig from your bottle as you push through the crowd. Once you've made your way to the center of the crowd, you assume the position - eyes closed, bottle raised above your head, swinging your hips to whatever top 40 hit the dj decides to bleed into the last one he played.  You don't have to wait long before you feel a body push up behind you and you welcome the distraction. You don't open your eyes or lower your hand except to drink from your near empty bottle, but you do back your ass up against the stranger behind you. It's definitely not Joel. This person behind you is way too lanky; when his arms encircle your waist they lack definition, his thighs aren't nearly as beefy as Joel's, and… you get frustrated with yourself.  Joel just insinuated dating you would be gross and all you can do is think about how hot he is? 

You shake your head, trying to clear your thoughts and enjoy the moment. The guy behind you is getting handsy, and normally that would bother you, but Joel was right about that dry spell. One song bleeds into another as you gyrate against this stranger who now has his hand splayed across your stomach under your shirt.

You're ripped unceremoniously from your mindless grinding by a large hand on your shoulder. You wink one eye open though you knew it was Joel. You're not interested in hearing him out, especially not with this stranger's hand gliding slowly up your torso, boldly inching closer to your chest.

"Darlin'" you hear Joel shout over the music, "'m sorry. I didn't mean…"

You put your palm in front of Joel's face before moving your hand on top of the stranger's, whose fingers are teasing the hem of your bra. Joel can be sorry, but he's also going to see how decidedly not-ew the thought of being with you is.

"Whatever, Joel. You can think being my boyfriend is gross. This is fine!" You open your eyes and the look on Joel's face is one you've never seen before. At this point he isn't looking at you, he's staring daggers at the man behind you. Whoever he is seems blissfully unaware.

"Honey, I'm out of touch. I'm fucking old, you said it yourself! I don't know how to - hey, buddy, do you fucking mind?" The hand under your shirt loses its grip on you as Joel shoves the shoulder of the guy behind you. Suddenly his body unglues itself from your back.

"My bad, man. Didn't know she had a boyfriend," he shouts over the music as he disappears back into the crowd. You groan and roll your eyes.

"So sorry, Joel! Turns out when you look and act like my boyfriend, people think you really are! How embarrassing for you," you ramble into Joel's ear. You turn to walk off the dance floor, embarrassed, but before you're out of his reach Joel grabs your forearm, pulling gently until you're flush with his body. He towers over you, his eyes bore into yours.

"Please listen," he bends to speak quietly into your ear, "I'm sorry, and I mean it. We're friends, and I value that. I thought I was bantering, bein' funny. I know you don't want to be a couple at this bar. I know you want to be friends, nothing more, with me. But…" he trails off, pulling away to look at your face.

The atmosphere changes in a way that you swear is straight out of a movie. The lights pulsing and flashing are hitting Joel's face in a way that makes him even more handsome, which you'd thought previously impossible. While your beer bottle is empty, clutched into your hand that hangs limply at your side, Joel's drink is nearly full, still frosty, and dripping condensation through your shirt, soaking your lower back. Joel's eyebrows are raised, waiting for you to do or say anything. 

And then the dj changes the song. You are… intimately familiar with what begins to play and you shake your head, chuckling. What divine intervention drove the dj to start playing a song about ruining a friendship at this very moment? You have no idea, but you make a mental note to thank the universe as you smile at Joel. You push away from him for just a second, long enough to rip the label off your empty beer bottle. Joel looks confused watching you ball up the damp paper. 

You chuckle as you toss the label at Joel, it pinging off his temple before you spin your body so your back is plastered against Joel's front. 

You'll show him sexually frustrated.

Joel seems to take a second to read the situation because his body doesn't move. In fact, it goes rigid. Your hips sway against him anyway. Joel only breaks out of his spell when your arm snakes around his neck and you bury your fingers in his hair. Tugging gently on his curls seems to awaken something in him and his hands are on you in seconds. The hand clutching his beer comes to rest on your hip as the other picks up where your previous dance partner left off, creeping under your shirt and splaying across your stomach. 

"What are we doin' here, baby?" Joel rasps into your ear, his voice deeper and more strained than you're used to. "I guess I deserve you teasin' me, but two can play this game." Joel's nose prods at a spot behind your ear as he peels one cup of your bra away from your body, replacing it with his hand. Your eyes fly open to ensure no one notices, but everyone on the dance floor is busy paying attention to their own partners. Joel rolls your nipple between two fingers before giving it a flick; you try and suppress a moan.

Not to be outdone, you reach for the beer bottle in Joel's hand. You make sure Joel's eyes are locked on you as you lick a stripe up the neck of the bottle, taking a generous sip before handing it back. Joel's eyes widen and he smirks, bringing his mouth back to your ear.

"Think it goes without sayin' now, but I really don't hate the idea of people thinking you're mine," Joel accentuates his last word with a gentle nip at your earlobe that makes your head loll back onto his shoulder. 

"Are you listening to the song, Joel?" You reach up to place your hand on Joel's cheek, turning his face gently so your eyes meet.  He looks confused, but you can tell he's training his ear onto the chorus of what's playing.

I wanna ruin our friendship

We should be lovers instead

I don't know how to say this

'Cause you're really my dearest friend

Joel lowers his eyes back down to meet yours and smirks. "You an' me both, darlin'." His hand around your waist pulls you impossibly closer and you feel him grow hard against your ass. 

"Know where I last heard this song?" The final notes start to dissipate, melding seamlessly with the next song. Joel shakes his head and asks where. You smirk, nuzzling into Joel's neck before you lick a stripe up to his ear. "It's on my sex playlist."

Joel stills. You grin, giggling as he pushes you away gently. "I've gotta close out the tab," he says once he remembers how to form thoughts into words. "Meet me at the truck. And think about what song you're gonna put on once I get you home."

[meidiary]

( 📁 ) THEY ENTERTAIN ANOTHER WOMAN FOR TOO LONG

synopsis: instead of them being jealous, this time you are because of their attention being focused on someone else 🤧

characters: zoro, luffy & sanji!

warnings: female terms used in zoro's & sanji's <3, nicknames + swearing, angst for sanji

mei's note: my previous post had an accidental angsty ending for luffy so i'll be posting a happy one soon! <3

⟶ @ahseyy request: ... And i have this idea 🤧 we had that the OP boys are jealous, sooooo obviously we need that Yn is jealous! ...

☆ "they're just friends!" usopp's words kept ringing in your mind as you stare at ZORO and his ex-girlfriend.. you and the rest of the strawhat crew had stopped sailing, planning to settle a bit on the island you came across. oh, how you deeply regret telling luffy that "this seems like a good place for us to stay in and regain our energy!" now you're stuck witnessing this situation play out, having you completely engrossed in it.

☆ usopp, having a sixth sense for drama, immediately noticed the lack of your presence as a result of you spying observing zoro and his ex.

☆ "are you done spying on your boyfriend?" he chuckles seeing your startled expression. "i'm not spying on him! i'm just-" you see her playfully slap his bicep, earning a displeased look on your face. "why is he even speaking to her for so long? it's not like they left at the best terms.." you blurt out, sighing after seeing usopp's sly smirk.

☆ you know he thinks you're an obsessively jealous person, but you can't find it in you to care because there she goes touching him again! the worst of it all is that zoro doesn't seem to be bothered by it.. your eyebrows furrow as you keep witnessing them smiling way too much, standing way too close, being way too touchy, and the worst of all; they're talking way too soft for you to eavesdrop!

"that's it, i'm going over there!" you utter annoyed, dropping the mop you were holding for the past 15 minutes, having made little to no progress at cleaning the ship's floor. usopp, taken aback, dashes to stand in front of you, blocking the exit of the ship. "are you out of your mind? don't you understand you'll be labeled as the most controlling girlfriend ever?! just- sit this confrontation out alright?" he let's out a sigh of relief, feeling he prevented a major fight to go down, not only between you and zoro, but possibly also between you and zoro's ex..

usopp was right, you know he was, but you couldn't bother thinking straight while you were still seeing that woman being handsy with your man. fuming, you gaze at the two, loathing the almost non-existent space there was between them. "i'm so done," you mutter upset. "please take over cleaning for me today, usopp.." you left to your room and plopped down on your bed, trying to put all your intrusive thoughts to rest.

but of course you couldn't after having seen that interaction between the two. were you exaggerating? was this normal? is it wrong for you to feel this way? this fuming feeling is causing you so much distress. it's like your thoughts are eating you up from the inside. you don't want to feel this way, like you're the one at fault, like you're not enough, like you'll never be enough.. right after that thought crept up out of the darkest pits of your brain, you heard a knock on your, now locked, bedroom door. "baby? you alright?.. why's the door locked-? baby?" you recognize zoro's voice immediately, mentally being stuck between picking the easy choice: ignoring him and bottling up your feelings, or the hard one: facing him and talk to him about your current thoughts..

unbeknownst to you, you unconsciously chose the former option. you open the door and look him in his eyes, hiding as much of your feelings possible. "what?" he furrows his brows, confused by your cold welcome before he remembers usopp warning him you weren't in a good mood because of his overfriendly encounter with his ex. "is this about her?" he chuckles before shaking his head slightly, in disbelief you'd be this bothered by someone from his past. "so what if it is?! is it so weird for me to be upset some woman is being all handsy with you?! and is it suprising that i got bothered even more by you not minding her touching you? is it that weird, zoro? 'cause if it is, please, do tell me!" you blurt out, almost all in one breath, before slamming the door shut.

you weren't planning on letting it out, you didn't want to bother, assuming he'd just brush it off as you exaggerating.. you didn't expect him to open the door you aggressively slammed in his face, so soon. you didn't expect him to, when he saw you leant on the wall with furrowed brows and a trembling upper lip, grab you by the waist and pull you closer to him, so close there was barely anything between you at all.. and least of all did you expect him to grab your chin, raising it so you looked him in the eyes while he told you "if i gave one shit about her, would i be here right now? tell me, if i didn't care about you at all, then why would i tell her i'm not interested in getting back together with her when she asked? why would i tell her i finally found someone that i want to spend the rest of my life with? shit, as cheesy as it sounds, it's true, baby.. i can't imagine being with anyone else except you. so please, don't you get jealous about girls i don't give a damn about."

you send him a soft smile, leaning your forehead on him. "don' know who told you i was jealous.. but you got to get better sources 'cause i for sure wasn't jealous.." zoro scoffs letting out a "yeah, right."

☆ needless to say you two made up and cuddled for the rest of the day.

☆ that would be the end.. but of course usopp had to bug you.. "hey! i took over your cleaning today, so you better take over mine for the next week.." usopp pleaded, with both his hands on his hips. "out." zoro mumbled into your neck, expecting him to comply instantly. "but-!" usopp began to bicker, before getting interrupted by zoro. "now." you accidentally let out a giggle, swiftly moving your hand to cover your mouth right after. "whatever! i will be back, considering this debt!" with that usopp leaves the room, leaving you two alone, enjoying the comfortable silence.

☆ SANJI is a womanizer, that's no shocking discovery. you've know about this fact since the moment you met him. he was charming you up while asking everyone's drinks and then he went off, flirting with another woman on his way back to the kitchen. that moment you learned that this was sanji. but there's also the caring sanji that'd make you a warm soup when you're sick, tending to your needs yet still somehow find away to make you blush whilst laughing with him. in addition to the caring sanji, there also is the determined sanji; whenever he'd speak about finding the all blue, and all the meals he would cook, all the different fish he would see, you could swear you saw his eyes glistening with adoration and resolve. further, intellectual sanji heavily plays a role in your daily life; happily helping you with mundane chores to the most exciting adventures you and your fellow strawhats go on. he fills you in on books he's read, food he's cooked, ingredients he's used, products he's bought and much more!

��� you could go on and on, daydreaming of all sanji's positive personality traits, but you're all time favorite would have to be considerate sanji.. the way he could immediately sense from you that you weren't feeling like your usual self still amazes you. how he always chooses the right moments to bring you a freshly brewed cup of tea with your favorite desert right next to it, which you have know idea how he had the time nor ingredients for. how he treats you like a princes and tells you how much you mean to him in so many different ways when you feel absolutely miserable. and, oh, how he always knows when to embrace you tightly and whisper sweet nothings into your ear, until it becomes numb.

☆ so with all that, you accepted him being a womanizer, having the seemingly perpetuous habits of bantering with other women. you always wondered if he'd stop flirting with so many women if you asked him to.. but then the thought that you two were nothing and wouldn't be anything else than friends hit you.

☆ nevertheless, seeing his cheeky smile being sent to some random woman, seeing him subtly sling his arm around her waist as he guids her to the dance floor, seeing him lean closer to her every minute, it was killing you, no more like slowly scraping you from the inside, the bottled up pain waiting for you to finally burst open.

you've been eyeing them the whole night, not once taking your eyes off of them or bothering to answer usopp's rants with more than a 'mhm,' or a 'hmm'. "have you listened to a word i said?!" usopp voiced suddenly, turning the strawhats' complete attention to you. "mhm.." absent-minded, you nod hearing him say something, but not comprehending the words he spoke.

"see, told you she wasn't paying attention," usopp leaned back against his seat after pulling up his shoulders, indicating he was right about you not paying attention to what anyone was saying. zoro, being the one seated next to you, tapped your shoulder, earning a "hm?" from you. getting annoyed by your negligence, he shifted his gaze to the direction you were looking in, finally understanding what the issue was.

to clarify your absent-mindness, zoro nudged his head towards sanji and his date. his date, who was sat on his lap at this point, making the knot in your stomach grow substantially. seeing his arm wrap around her hips as she leaned on him was your final stroke, your last straw. it was your breaking point.. you've reached, no, you've long surpassed your limit for these shenanigans, but right now, this very moment you finally break.

you suddenly feel a rush of tears burn your eyes, overwhelmed with your thoughts and emotional distress. you jump up, hurriedly leaving the club room you were in, not wanting anyone to see you in your current state. you desperately search for a private area where you can cry yourself out of this situation without having people judge you. but you notice the whole place is packed with couples who can't keep their hands off of each other, except the balcony, so you shakingly make your way to the cold space.

all of a sudden, you hear someone's heavy breathing behind you. "darling? what's the matter? what happened?!" sanji. he asks you breathlessly, due to him running after you. you quickly tried to wipe your tears away, but they kept coming! making you feel even more hysterical. "hey, hey now -" sanji notices your crying, he turns you around, his arms moving from your arms down to your waist, pulling you closer to him. "talk to me, sweetheart.. please, just talk to me.." he pleads, moving his face closer to yours.

"i- i can't- do- it!" you babbled in-between sobs. "what, darling? who did this to you?" sanji moves his hands to your cheeks, pulling your face to his, carefully. "you..! you're killing me!" he furrows his brows in confusion. once you calmed down, you slowly tore one of his hands off your face. "i can't keep seeing you with others, sanji.. it really fucking hurts! i- i just can't-" you push him away a little, "i can't keep bottling it up sanji.. i'm done.."

☆ he didn't even mean to.. he was just being friendly, he was cracking jokes, making sure she was feeling calm and at peace, he asked sanji to get her something to snack, he was being luffy..

☆ normally, you'd swoon over him whenever he'd be in this caring mood of his. but not this time, no. this time, you were close to glowing green out of envy. you shouldn't be feeling this way, you know that. you trust luffy with your everything! it just hits you in the wrong place whenever he leans towards her when she speaks. it's like you can feel your heart cramp up each time she looks up at him and smiles, receiving his usual toothy grin in return.

☆ she was lost, abandoned at sea by her very own family. at least that's the bit you picked from usopp dramatically narrating her lifestory. is it heartless that all you could think of was that you hoped, the strawhats and you would drop her off at the very next island, wish her luck with her life, and continue your journeys? knowing luffy, that's the last thing that would happen. no, it's not even on the list of things he would ever consider! your thoughts made you feel absolutely terrible. you weren't a bad person, so why were you being so uncaring towards this poor girl who had lost so much? envy. jealousy can bring out the absolute worst in people. the lowest of a person's nature gets drawn out someone. and that someone now, was you.

you tried to stay away from her, not wanting to accidentally lash out. you felt bad for her, you did, but you also how far you could go, when jealousy takes apart in decision-making. so you avoid her, and just like that, you were also avoiding luffy. because for some reason, he was always near her, always. it's like he was scared she'd run away?

luffy noticed. but he didn't know the reason you were avoiding her. he's always optimistic and cheerful, so everyone expects him to always be exactly that, except you. you were there for him, allowing him to have bad days. he didn't have to hide his feelings or emotions. it was a relief for him to find someone like you, someone he lived so dearly, who lived him back just as much. it was refreshing, calming, delightful. what happened? what did he do? was he too much? or did he do too little to show you he cares so much, that he'd give you the world if you asked for it. he'd go to the moon and back for you. he doesn't know how, but he'd find a way. and now he lost you? that can't be true. it can't. he won't accept it!

that's how you got in your current situation; his face was buried in the crook of your neck, his hands holding you tightly by your waist, mumbling something about how good you smell.

you had told him the reason you were avoiding was because of your sudden jealousy. he laughed for a good 10 minutes about how ridiculous you were to think of something like that! but in his mind, oh, how relieved he was that you weren't avoiding him because you fell out of love with him. it was because you were too in love with him..

☆ you two ended up having a picnic on deck, trying to keep usopp and chopper away from your neatly set up meals prepared by sanji (duh)

☆ luffy kept teasing you about how jealous you were and that you love him too much for your own good. acting like he wasn't on the verge of being a crying mess because he thought he lost you 🙄

☆ he kept giving you nose tip smooches while telling you you'll never lose him <3

MEI'S NOTE: so, uhm yeah sanji's part was definitely something...

... hope you enjoyed!! <3

[37-drc89]

the way things go; lee minho

❁ nothing warms your heart more than his presence.

trope: roommates to lovers.

genre: comfort, slight angst, work exhaustion, happy ending.

summary: finally understanding that your failure doesn't scare him away.

warnings: blood, mention of overprotective parent, family problems, let me know if i should put anything more in here.

word count: 3,7k.

masterlist

note: this is very much my first fic here, like, ever. i'm still green in tumblr, any links and mostly making posts look good, but i'll eventually master it. i look forward to seeing your opinions and things i can change or make better, i'll appreciate every comment. and, please remember that english is not my first language! if you see any typo or something doesn't make sense, please inform me! thank you:)

Coming back home on Friday after whole week of working your ass off really feels like a walk of shame. You feel like everyone passing by can tell how awfully you did at your workplace today. And they wouldn't be wrong, the amount of scolds your boss threw in your direction through past few days is worryingly numerous.

Whether it was missing out on paper work your boss asked you to do for him, because you were so sure the deadline was set on the day after, or accidentially knocking off of your desk whole cup of hot, sweetened tea that later on you had to scrap off of the covering, under the strict eye of the middle aged man that scared you so much. Especially with the amount of misfortune that chased after you lately, like it was glued to you.

Cringe makes its way to your face. You're shuffling your way to your apartment, not really in a hurry, feet lazily dragged after you as you didn't even have any strenght to properly lift them off the ground. You most likely look like you've been partying for at least three nights in a row, but you can't find it in yourself to care about it. Not now.

Seeing the building in which your apartment is placed have never felt so relieving and you can feel your legs giving up under your weight just at the thought of splashing on the bed and dozing off. Vision of passing out on the sidewalk doesn't seem appealing to you, so you rush yourself to the door, typing entrance code and walking into the elevator, stairs not even crossing your mind. Your tired body slumps itself against the wall as you patiently wait to get to the 6th floor, finding relief in having something to support yourself on. Finally getting to the door you can't help but feel excited, tapping your feet happily just at the thought of making up every hour of sleep you've missed this week because of your busy schedule. You slide the door open and the very first thing reaching your ears is eager meowing, three fur balls appearing at the entrance immediately. You can't help but smile, kneeling to give each of them gentle head pat before taking off the coat and shoes. This truly felt like a bliss, like you've just slid off a bag of stones off your back. Sigh leaves your mouth, heading to the kitchen you turn on the kettle as your tea craving grows with every second. Soonie appears next to you, sitting at the table just across from you. You've grown so friendly with your roommate's Minho's cats that neither you nor him have any problem with kitties occupying places people normally wouldn't let them sit on.

Then you freeze for a second.

You look at Soonie.

Soonie looks at you.

Your brows furrow and the cat goes back to whatever he was doing previously.

Fuck.

Minho is coming home today. He's been away for past five days due to his business trip, that was probably exhaustion fogging your mind enough to forget about this. He's coming back today. And your apartment looks like a bomb has been detonated right in the middle of it all. You can't risk him seeing how messy you got, Minho is always the one to put stuff at the right place, making his bed no matter in how much of a hurry he's in, always the one to do the dishes and basically make everything look perfect. You can't see him disappointed in you for such an easy thing, he'll think you don't even gather your life together. Not like you do, but it's nothing in his business, you shouldn't become another one of his problems. He's just your roommate and the only thing you share and should take care of is apartment that is now in complete mess. You can blame it on your lack of time, barely spending any time at your place recently, but that won't help in current situation.

Quick glance at the time, 4:23 pm, you reach out for your phone to scroll up the conversation with your friend to make sure how fast you have to act.

He's back in town at 5 pm. Could this possibly get any worse?

You scold yourself internally for letting this whole situation happen. But you don't have time to think about this now, and as you turn off the kettle you speedrun to the livingroom, gathering scattered clothes from all around the place. You blame it on Monday when you got up so late you didn't even have time for brushing your hair and of course, the shirt you were looking for was nowhere to be found. Out of all things, it was the one you needed that day.

Then you pick up empty cans of soda, bottles of water and cups of coffee from the table and quickly throw them into the dishwasher. You blame it on Tuesday, the night you realised you have to write that fucking paperwork you got scolded for missing on Monday. So you sat there for hours, head empty, taking breaks only when your tired tears started wetting your pages, scared that all your miserable efforts will be ruined.

Rushing to Minho's room you pick up blanket and pillows from his floor. You blame it on Wednesday, the day you were already on the edge of breaking down and giving up on your job. Even though the boy is only a roommate for you, you've grown so used to his presence you started finding peace in it. Even after the worst day you knew that someone will always be there waiting at your apartment to serve you cup of hot chocolate and bowl of ramen, to take your turn of folding laundry or just listen to how appaling your day was. But he wasn't home and it left you all to yourself which was never the best idea. So, seeking for at least tiny bit of comfort, you slept on his floor. That sounds so fucking stupid and weird when you think about it now, but just the aura Minho left in his room made you feel a bit closer to him. Reminds you of every time he invited you over to play some online games for 12 year olds or spill any tea that happened at his work. Though, you never wanted to interfere his private space, so sleeping in his bed didn't even cross your mind. Floor was just sufficient for you, and you let your tears flow that night, just as much as you needed it. You know he would understand. He might seem cold to others, but you know he would. He already unwrapped his side of him to you letting you see that truly, inside, he's softer than anyone you know; It's all for Soonie, Doongie and Dori. They really do get the best of Minho.

Going back to the kitchen, you gather empty boxes of instant ramen, snacks and every ready shop food that you could possibly find at the convenience store. You blame it on the whole week of rushing, not even having time to eat a proper meal. You can feel it down your stomach, body demanding anything that could properly feed it and give it any strenght to function as it should be functioning. Honestly, you can't recall the last time you didn't feel sick. Lump in your throat was your loyal companion since a week ago, constant urge to throw up not leaving your body even when you were falling asleep and you know you'll have to appreciate normal, nutritions food more.

You run around the apartment holding a wet towel, wiping quickly every mirror hung on the walls as you know nothing pisses Minho more than fogged glass. So you try your best to do it carefully, just like he does it. Reaching the last mirror placed in the front hall you eagerly wipe it, aware of your lack of time. Then it all happens at once.

Shitty food, lack of sleep, liters of coffee and ungodly amount of stress feel like kicking in all at once, like it's been gathering in your exhausted body for the whole week just for this one moment that you needed to be fucking careful.

Vision blurry, feet suddently tripping over itself, mind going blank just for a second, but second is enough for you to try holding yourself onto the small table placed right under the mirror and shaking it so hard when sudden thump reach your ears, followed by loud sound of shattered glass. You don't want to look. Because you're fully aware of what just happened. You don't want to look but you do. Eyes landing on the remains of now broken vase, water all over the floor, flowers that were resting inside it now cut in half and completely soaked.

And it was Minho's favourite vase. The first and the last thing he always glanced at when leaving or coming back home, admiring its beauty, pretty patterns, unique shape and the prettiest flowers inside. Flowers that he got for his 25th birthday that passed not so long ago from his dearest best friend Jisung. Flowers that he was so happy to receive, first thing he did after coming home that day was showing them to you, proudly, ranting about how they perfectly suit the room. And you ruined it all.

Your body slides slowly on the wet floor, water soaking your pants on your knees and you support yourself on the palms of your hands not to completely fall into the mess. You feel small pieces of glass ripping open your delicate skin of your hands, small streams of blood making their way to the floor, mixing with spilled water but you couldn't care less. Elbows start to shake under the weight of your body, shoulders tensing and your head falls, your own quiet sobs reaching your ears. It quickly turns into uncotrollable groans and whines, tears now flowing down your face with no end, nose already full, loose hair stick to your now completely soaked cheeks.

And you blame it on yourself. You could seek for anything to put his all on, like your boss, for making you feel useless for not even managing to do your fucking job properly and assigning you more work than anyone else in your department. Or your mother for not teaching you how to manage your time and how to function on your own, her overprotectiveness during your childhood and teenage years showing so often that you never even got any time to learn adult life before stepping into it. But you know it isn't their fault, no matter how hard you try to think that it is. You let yourself into this situation. You let yourself be in the state you're currently in. You didn't try hard enough to make yourself a decent person. There's no one you can blame but you.

Your endless cries must've muffled the sound of door cracking open, eyes reaching only feet of your roommate that was now standing at the entrance. You couldn't look up, even if you wanted to, you couldn't look Minho in the eyes. Not when he's witnessing your failure and the mess you made out of something so dear to him.

Meanwhile Minho stood there, body frozen, gazing at your tiny figure splashed on the floor, shoulders shaking. He doesn't even notice the crashed vase at first, your current state drawing all his attention immediately to you.

He doesn't give himself any time to think much longer about what's happening in his front hall right now, dropping bags he's been holding in his right hand and suitcase on his left and appearing at your side the second after, kneeling by your vulnerable body on the floor.

"Hey, hey.." Minho lightly lays his hand on your shaky back, carefully caressing it to soothe you. "Easy now, I'm here."

The only respond he gets is your dramatic, loud sob ripping out of your heavy chest. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry Minho... Is the only thing you could get out of yourself, followed by another set of pretty disgusting, wet cries.

"Are you hurt? Let me see your hand, please," your roommate asked quietly not to scare you after noticing red coloured drops beside your knees. Gently, he took your harmed hands into his and studied small pieces of glass stuck in your skin. "Let's get it cleaned, okay?"

His hand makes its way to your waist and he stands up slowly, careful not to make any sudden moves that could put you in pain. He shuffles you to the bathroom and helps you sit on the toilet seat and starts preparing alcohol and wet towels.

You feel pathetic.

Not only you ruined his special item, something so important and beautiful, but now he has to take care of someone that caused all the damage. You feel helpless once again, like you couldn't do anything fucking right for once. Once.

Your caring roommate starts removing glass shatters from your wound, his tongue sticking out a bit from the corner of his mouth, fully concentrated in his task. He knows that if his hands twitch even a little bit, he might hurt you even more, and let me tell you, his hands are trembling. He can't recall a situation when he saw you in such state.

You always seem tough, tough against any misfortune that meets you. You surely talk to him when you need some shoulder to lay on, about your worse days and he's cautious enough to notice when you're exhausted. But he's never seen you at your breaking point, starting to believe you don't have any. Yet you're here, in front of him, not even being able to speak properly. He can't help but feel kind of relieved at the whole situation knowing that your hard, protective shell cracked a little bit, letting him see something he's never seen in you before. Weakness.

"This might sting a bit," Minho informs you as he presses alcohol soaked paper to your wound. Whimper leaves your mouth at the unpleasant feeling and you hang your head down. He quickly wraps bandage around your hand and clasps it between his warm palms.

"Hey, you don't have to worry about that the hall. I'll take care of it, okay?" He tries to lower himself, kneeling in front of you, so he can get a better glimpse of your puffed face. You shake your head and straighten your back, looking at him with serious expression.

"No." You sniff, "No, I broke it, I broke something so important to you and it's my fault. I'll clean it. I'll buy you a new one, the same one, I promise Minho."

His hands make their way to your back, slowly, eyes remaining on you for any sign of discomfort. When you sneakily lean into the touch, Minho pulls your body entirely towards his, clasping your weak figure into his arms and sways you left and right, wanting to feel your muscles relax in his embrace.

"What's wrong, hm? My roommate senses are tingling," his voice muffles itself by pressing his mouth against your shoulder, "Talk to me, y/n, please?"

"I had the worst week ever here, without you."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

You just shake your head no, holding onto his waist tighter than ever. You feel him nod. His calm aura pulls you in completely, feeling like walking into hot building during snowy, cold winter. Your cheeks warm up, pressing right below his neck, his body warmth transferring itself to you.

"It's lowkey weird." You choke out, coughing right after because of how stuffed your poor throat felt.

"What is?"

"You comforting me while I'm sitting on a toilet seat."

You manage to let out throaty chuckle to light the atmosphere up, however, you can't help the warm stream of tears flowing right after.

"Want to move it to the livingroom?" Minho pulls out of the hug slightly, setting his gaze at your red face again and your eyes make their way to the floor. You still haven't looked him in the eyes, not even once, as you're scared of the wave of guilt that will follow. As if the one you're feeling right now isn't enough. You feel like a child scared to get shouted at by their parents.

Minho crouches down in front of you and you hum in question, brows furrowed. He only gestures with his hand for you to hop onto his back, already positioning your legs on his hips. You groan but don't protest, you know how Minho is and you know fighting him is hopeless. Wrapping your arms around his next securely and glueing your chest onto his back, you melt into the warmth of his body. He stands up, feeling your breath tickling the skin behind his ear and smiling to himself, noticing how it got much steadier than it was before. He leads both of you out the bathroom and again, the sad view of Minho's favourite vase on the floor, not really looking any similar to vase anymore, hits you, shoving another wave of guilt through your nerves. You close your eyes and rest your forehead on your roommate's shoulder.

"I'm truly, so, so sorry Minho. I never meant to do this, I was just trying to make the place look presentable for you and it ended like it always does." the words left your mouth as quiet squeak, taking another deep breath before speaking again; "Yet you still have to clean the mess I did, like you always do. I don't deserve it, I don't deserve you. I failed being your perfect roommate."

"Who said I wanted a perfect roommate?" he asks as you reach your shared couch, carefully laying you on it then sitting by your side, facing you. "You think I'm mad at you, but I'm not. I've broken like five vases in my life and none of this was anything I planned, just like you."

You finally find some strenght in yourself to raise your gaze and lock it at his round, dark eyes. And he's right, no matter how intensively you look into them, you can't find even a tiny bit of anger in them, they sparked with understanding and you find yourself feeling bad at even thinking someone this precious could get so mad at you. They were so pure you could see your ugly, messed up reflection in them. Before you could start thinking about this again, his eyes squinted a little bit as corners of Minho's lips curled upwards in the most beautiful, sincere, affectionate smile you've ever seen. You only realised that his hand was placed on your trembling knee when you felt his fingers caressing it softly, sending warm shiver through your whole body.

"What about the flowers? You loved them..." You turned around to take a glimpse of the mess once again but Minho quickly grabbed your chin with only pads of his fingers and made you look back at him. "I'll take over from here, you get rest now."

Just as he was about to stand up from the couch you grabbed him by his sleeve and almost agressively pulled him right into your arms, crashing in the tightest, breath taking hug as you truly couldn't believe you had him by your side. Just when you thought you crossed his boundaries by that sudden action and started to loose your grip on him, he dragged you right back to him like he was waiting for this moment to happen. His heart pressed to yours, he definitely could tell how fast and heavy its beating right now. Both of yours eyes closed, you just enjoyed this such intimate moment, very first one since you've moved in together. Neither you or him dare to make a move in fear of ruining this beautiful scene.

"Thank you," you murmur into his neck, so quietly you're not even sure he heard it. "only you can endure me as your roommate. How are you not tired of this?" Chuckle leaves your mouth but you quickly tone it out in case he responds, Well, I am actually tired.

"Because you're the only one that can endure me, too." He pulls out of the hug, though he doesn't move too far away, being so close to your face you could feel his minty breath on your nose. "I guess it's just the way things go."

Next thing your brain processes is his perfect lips landing on yours in swift motion. Suprisingly they're not rough, not even a little bit, they're so soft you barely feel them at first. Your heart goes up your throat for a mere second, dropping back down the moment he caress your cheek gently with his warm hand, now covered in the tiniest layer of sweat caused by the adrenaline. When your body finally understands what's going on, you lean into him completely, hand going up on the back of his head, tangling into his soft, dark hair and Minho takes is as a sign to continue, now pressing his lips onto yours with more force, making sure you feel them properly. A sigh of relief leaves both of your mouths and you smile into the kiss. When you eventually just slightly pull away from each other, faces still close, you notice new emotion making its way into his eyes, overtaking the rest as he studies every part of your face carefully. It's love. His eyes are full of love. Its so intense like it just have been freed from his chest after months of hiding in the deepest corners of his heart.

There's still so much you don't know about him and there's so much he doesn't know about you, but the gate has opened now and there's no turning back. You don't know what any of this means yet, but you can think of it tomorrow. Or in a month. Or in a year.

For now it's just you and him. And that's what matters the most in the world.

[petr1kov]

lmao you guys won't believe what happened to me tonight. my cat charlotte was playing and jumping around as she always does, but she knocked down an iron chair and got one of her little legs crushed under the weight of it (because the little idiot clung down to the chair as it fell instead of jumping out of it). she didn't have any visible injuries, but was crying and limping, so i had to take her to the doctor immediately. sure enough, after a battery of exams and a bunch x-rays, it turns out that the worst possible scenario was real and she (seemingly) irreversibly fractured one of the bones in her knee. she had to be sedated and medicated in order to take these exams and is a bit loopy right now.

so, out of absolutely nowhere, i had to come up with over a 1000 reais total to pay for her stay there at this very night - nearly all of my savings for this month. 929 for the exams, and another 100 or so for medicine, so she won't feel pain while we wait for her to get to an orthopedist. the vet said that she will very likely need surgery or risk healing it wrong, but only the orthopedist can say for sure. i really hope she won't need to do it, for every reason in the world, but we'll see in a few days.

anyway, all of this to say that unfortunately, i must once again ask for your financial help, as currently, i don't have enough money left for me to even pay the orthopedist i'll have to schedule (and definitely not enough for me to live through the rest of the month, regardless). so if you're able to, please consider donating something to my account! and if not, just spreading this post around will be a huge help. thank you! 💞

k0-fi ✨

[plutoswritingplanet]

Hand That Feeds (Cooper Howard/The Ghoul x Female!Reader) pt. 2

a/n: this one's a bit shorter, next one will have smut, i am so fcking sleepy writing this i'll have to check tomorrow it this isn't a hallucination

Warnings: Horny Violence, Blood and Guts, Suggestive Themes, we're on a steady route to pound town

Summary: Cooper catches his prize, but an uninvited guest puts a strain on an already rocky relationship. Cross-Posted on AO3

PT. 1

You must be a Vault Dweller. Truly. There is no other way to explain the utter lack of self-preservation skills.

Cooper finds you almost immediately after the sun sets. He can see the flickering light of your small bonfire through the trees, and languidly, he stalks forwards, opting to stay in the shadows to observe you a moment longer. 

You're sitting on the ground, back leaning against a destroyed carcass of a plane. Hair pushed out of your face, Cooper can see the flames illuminating your focused expression with warm light. Once again, he's struck by this seemingly regal air around you. Like you've been raised in a castle, far from this fucked up place, that is now his home. A princess, stuck in harsh reality. Eyebrows furrowed, bottom lip tucked hard between your teeth, you seem to be pondering over something.

With quick motions, you take your messenger bag, opening it and dumping its contents onto the ground in front of you. It's somewhat hard to see, but the sound of small glass bottles knocking into each other is telling enough. 

Taking stock of your inventory, you begin to tuck everything back into the bag. Chems upon chems, RadAway, RadX, quite the little drug library, and Cooper's eyes immediately lock onto his most sought after, amber liquid. Why would a Smoothie like you need any of that stuff is beyond him. He hasn't seen any Ghouls in the small town you hail from. 

Perks of the job, he thinks to himself, as you stack away at least five vials.

At the last bottle, you hesitate, bringing it up towards the light, and looking at it with a worried expression. The liquid swirls inside, and Cooper watches from the shadows, as you press the cold glass against your forehead in a motion eerily reminding him of a prayer. Your shoulders shudder, and Cooper's mangled ears strain, as he sees your mouth move.

- Let me be brave - you whisper to the vial, like some ancient spell, and something new tightens in his chest, something he immediately brushes away.

Then, he sees you lift a very familiar piece of equipment, putting it on your wrist, and begin to tweak something in the controls. A Pip-Boy. Old and battered, but apparently still working. All his confusing feelings are wiped clean in an instant. Now, he's truly intrigued. The clasps seem slightly too big for your hand, and the device slides the length of your arm, as you move. 

You sigh, heavily, then press something, and the Geiger meter clicks to life, picking up on stray radiation. Cooper feels his muscles tense, knowing all too well, why the device has activated so rapidly. As a Ghoul, he leaves a trail of radiation, that follows him wherever he goes. He wasn't particularly aware, that a Pip-Boy could pick up on it, but he wasn't surprised either.

 The sound makes you freeze in your spot. Slowly, you scan the area, your hand extended towards the darkening outline of the surrounding trees. As your hand passes by the place Cooper has chosen as his hiding spot, the meter grows louder. 

Jumping to your feet, you raise the blasted thing in front of you, your other hand tugging at the waistband of your skirt, freeing your trusted kitchen knife. As if to double-check, you put your hand somewhere to the back, listening to the quiet cracking noise. 

You can't fully confirm your suspicions on time, as Cooper springs to action. 

A thick line of rope falls over your shoulders, and before you have the chance to react, the loop around you tightens. Your entire body is tugged with surprising force in the direction of the treeline. Loosing your footing, you collapse onto the damp forest floor, chin scraping in the process. The yelp of shock tearing out of your throat, rings through the surrounding area, before you literally, eat dirt. The force of the impact wrenches the knife from your hand, as it bends at an uncomfortable angle. The weapon lands somewhere in the grass, the blade reflecting the flames.

Wiggling like a worm, trying to free yourself from the bounds, you notice a pair of well-worn shoes entering your vision. They cross the remaining distance, stopping just short of your head. Knees crack as your attacker squats down, before taking your hair into a hard grip and lifting your head from the dirt. 

Your face twists in pain, neck craning uncomfortably, and with an overwhelming feeling of finality, your eyes land onto the face of a ghoul. The Ghoul. He turns his head slightly to the side with the meanes of grins, before letting go of your hair, your head falling back into the dirt. 

- Oh, motherfucker - you groan, pulling your legs up, and attempting to get up.

- Stay down - the Ghoul's voice is rough and biting, and sudden pressure on your back pins you to the ground. - Do you know how fuckin' stupid it is, to light a fire in the wilderness? Any unsightly character could pick you off in seconds. 

Spitting out stray clumps of earth and grass from your mouth, you scoff at his scolding tone.

- Thankfully, there are no unsightly characters here, huh? 

- Oh, I wouldn't say that, sweetheart. - the bounty hunter tugs the toe of his shoe under your side, and kicks up, turning your body.

You roll onto your back, throwing a nasty look at the Ghoul, as he secures the loop of his lasso. His eyes reflect the light in the most haunting of ways, and you squirm under his gaze, which drags itself across your body, stopping briefly at the tips of your breasts, peaking from under your shirt. Swallowing thickly, your muscles relax, in hopes of loosening the rope. It barely gives, but your limbs recover some wiggle room. 

Cooper blinks, his head jerking to the side, and only as he brings his hand up, do you register the gun in his hand. Making sure you can see it, he turns towards your messenger bag, grabbing it from the ground where you left it. 

He sits down, somewhere outside your field of vision, and you risk pulling yourself up into a sitting position. He doesn't seem to mind it now, too busy with rummaging through your belongings. Finally, he pulls out a vial of amber liquid, watching it swirl in the flickering light of the bonfire. 

- Now - Cooper starts, as he grabs the inhaler from his pocket, inserting the vial into it - Why would a backwoods healer have something like this on 'er?

Rolling your shoulders ever so slightly, the rope slides further down your arms, and you regard the Ghoul with a venomous rendition of a "are you fucking dumb?" look. Which he doesn't appreciate. His hands tremble, as he closes his mouth over the inhaler, taking a long hit, draining the entire vial. You try very hard, not to notice the low moan flowing out of him, as the drug enters his system. Or the way his eyes flutter blissfully for just a second. 

- You never know, who might be needing help... - you mutter, wincing at the biting pain in your limbs.

- Well ain't that considerate of you - he coughs into his gloved hand, before sighing deeply, his head reclining back against the plane's exterior, his eyes closed.

From where you're sitting, he looks weirdly handsome. Rugged and very much Ghoul-like, but handsome nonetheless. The skin of his neck is pulled taunt, and in the flickering light of a dying bonfire, you can see a myriad of scars, littering any surface of his skin that's visible. Still, there were other matters at hand, that needed your attention, and you try to shift in your seat as quietly as possible, slowly but surely sliding the rope down your body. 

- Next time you try to run away, I'll shoot you - your efforts are stilled by his warning tone, and by the way he waves his gun at you, you know he'll make good on this promise.

- Thought you needed me in good condition.

To that, he finally throws you a look from under his cowboy hat. 

- Good... - he confirms, his other hand slowly shortening the length of the rope connecting the both of you - Ain't the same as mint. 

The loop suddenly digs further into your flesh, and you grunt at the uncomfortable feeling of the rough rope scratching at your exposed upper arms. 

Unfortunately, he's right. During your time as the local healer, you've done many questionable things to ensure the well-being of the town. One of those things, was dealing with organ harvesters. You've only bought a limb or a finger, every once in a while, as if that was some consolation for your darkened soul. Those moments quickly taught you, that something being good was most certainly not the same as ideal. Or mint, as your captor has supplied. 

- You a Vault-Dweller? - the Ghoul finally asks, breaking the small spell of silence between you.

The question doesn't surprise you, and you lift the Pip-Boy as far up, as the lasso allows you. Which isn't a lot. 

- Nah - the flames dance on your suddenly melancholic expression, and Cooper drinks it all up, curiosity spiking with each new information - My mother was. She ran away from her Vault when she was a teenager and joined the Brotherhood soon after. 

- The Brotherhood doesn't recruit women - Cooper turns his body towards you, fishing for lies like a shark sniffing for blood. 

- Oh, it doesn't? - your lips pull back into a teasing smile, which perhaps isn't the smartest thing to do, but entertainment is scarce in the Wastelands, and you're determined to have some fun - She posed as a man for years, picked up a job as a medic.

Cooper hums to himself, inviting you to elaborate with an inclination of his head. 

- There, she met my father - you continue, looking over at the last glowing embers of the bonfire - They were discovered, court martialed for treason. They escaped together and had me somewhere along the way.

Your Pip-Boy still cracks, the radiation emanating from the Ghoul making the Geiger meter go haywire. With soft eyes, your hand traces the outline of the screen, watching the way green light dances on your fingers. 

- The forbidden love of the Wasteland - you sigh into the silence - Sounds like a title of some romance novel, no?

- Or a bad porno - Cooper grumbles, rolling his eyes.

- What's a porno?

His head snaps towards you in record speed, a myriad of emotions running through his mangled expression. It settles on deep annoyance, when he notices the sly smirk on your lips, and you have to bite the inside of your cheek to stop yourself from laughing. 

- Gotcha - your attempt at finger guns is pathetic at best.

- Oh, you think you're a fucking comedian, huh? - the bounty hunter asks, a slight amused tint to his words, which you consider to be a small victory.

- That's why they put a bounty on me - you giggle - I'm too damned funny. 

- Shut it.

The sudden change in his tone catches you off guard, and you cock an eyebrow at him, confused. The Ghoul looks much more tense than seconds ago, his hand tightening around his gun. One of his legs kicks up a pile of dirt, smothering the dying embers of the bonfire, as he leans forward, seemingly ready to jump. 

- Had I known you were such a buzz kill...-

You're not allowed to finish, as the Ghoul basically throws himself in your direction. Your yelp is cut short with a piece of flimsy cloth being shoved into your mouth. A series of muffled sounds, vaguely resembling "is this my robe?" escape you, and the Ghoul pushed against your head, until you fall back down onto the ground. 

His body is hot against yours, as he covers you entirely with his weight. It's quite difficult to breathe through the makeshift gag and the overwhelming scent of blood, gunpowder, and the sickly sweet undertone of rot. As well as the unfamiliar feeling of having someone so close. You were a hermit after all. 

- I said, shut the fuck up - he whispers harshly into your ear, and you shiver underneath him, as his chest rises and falls against your back. 

Then, a sound somewhere close to the forest line makes your head whip in its direction. Cracking of twigs and heavy footsteps, coming closer and closer with clear determination. 

- Healer? - your entire body stiffens, as a familiar voice rings out through the trees. - Are you alright, Healer?

Benny. The same Benny, which led this damned bounty hunter right to your doorstep is currently making his merry way towards the both of you. Your eyes follow the way the Ghoul's thumb loads the pistol with a click of finality, and suddenly new energy floods your system.

- Stop fucking moving - Cooper grounds down on his teeth, as you attempt to free yourself from both his grip, and the lasso's.

Images of Benny, bloodied and dead, flash through your mind, and despite your lack of any sympathy towards the man, you don't want to see it. So, you start to move again, violently shaking under the Ghoul, forcing the lasso to slide from your body. Your hips jerk from the ground, bucking into him like a wild animal, and somewhere behind your ear, you can hear him suck in a sharp breath. Which you have no time to dwell upon. Your tongue fights against the fabric of your robe, and after a second you're able to spit it out.

- Don't shoot him - you plead feverishly, hands gripping the Ghoul's forearm - I'll talk to him, he'll leave. Just don't shoot him, please.

Cooper looks down at you, his eyes hard on your face, as he watches out for any signs of deceit. Then, he presses his lips into a thin line.

- Make it quick, or I'll pop his head clean off his shoulders. - southern accent floods every syllable, and were you not fighting to save a life (again), you would've blushed.

- Yes, thank you. I'll be quick. Thank you. - words spill out of you like a broken faucet, whispered into the space between your bodies, as the bounty hunter tugs off the loop of his lasso. 

You take a moment to steady yourself, as he drags you up with him, hand twisted into the front of your shirt. Still a little stunned, you allow him to manoeuvre you, turning your body in his grasp, until your back is pressed flush against his front. 

Strong arm sneaks over your shoulders, hand clasping around the column of your throat, while the other one waits just outside of your vision. The barrel of the gun rests between your shoulder and your neck, and the coolness of the metal causes a myriad of goosebumps to erupt across your skin. 

- I'm here Benny - you call out, praying to anything that would listen, that your plan would work - Come out, slowly. 

To his credit, Benny has always been quite good at following directions. There weren't many attributes about him either way, a bit dim in the head, a bit too heroic. 

And definitely a bit too quick to pull out a gun.

Which is what he does as soon as he sees your peculiar situation. The Ghoul drums his fingers against your pulse point, and Benny approaches, a simple shotgun in front of him.

- What the hell...?

- Benny, I need you to listen to me - your voice sounds way too panicked, and you swallow hard to fake some illusion of control over this situation - I need you to turn around, and leave.

- But, there's a Ghoul with a gun behind you, Healer.

You nearly jump out of your skin, when you feel the hot breath of your unwanted companion on the back of your neck. You can almost imagine his chapped lips, so close to your skin.

- Time's a tickin', sweetheart - he whispers, and your blood runs cold in your veins. 

- He's a - you swallow, mouth going dry in an instant - He's my friend. Who's getting very anxious with the trigger, Benny, so please, just go home. 

Deep down inside you know there is no scenario, where the farmer leaves alive. He signed his death warrant the moment he stepped out of the shadows, yet for some unknown reason, that just makes you fight against the odds harder. Call it dumb optimism, perhaps you're possessed by your mother's spirit. Or perhaps the chems have finally scrambled your brains for good. 

- He's not looking very friendly - Benny's gun sways slightly, as he tries to keep it raised, muscles evidently straining against the weight - He's the guy that shot Pete.

Oh for fucks sake, your whole body starts shaking at this point, heart thrumming in your chest like a moth batting against a lampshade. You can feel the Ghoul smirk against the skin of your shoulder, and tears prick at the corners of your eyes. His thumb presses slightly into your pulse, feeling it run rampant against his finger. 

- Please - somehow you hope the desperation in your voice will be enough - Please, leave. Benny, please.

Benny looks between you and the Ghoul peaking over your trembling form. You can see his brain working overtime, scrunched eyebrows, smacking of the lips. You're only praying it's working in the right direction. Then, some idea flashes across his expression, and you know in the hollow of your stomach, that this is his end.

- If I save you, will you marry me? - he asks, looking at you with the utmost hopeful expression.

- ...what?

Confusion doesn't even fully register in your mind, as the deafening sound of a gun being fired nearly blows up your eardrums. At first you're not sure, what you're looking at. Where there used to be Benny, now there's a carcass, mangled and bloody. It's hard to figure out, where individual parts of his body are, some bones sticking out from the chunky mush. A spray of red falls onto your face like a morning mist, and the scent of iron and gunpowder is stunning your senses. 

You can't move. Eyes glued to what once used to Benny, you don't even notice, as the Ghoul removes himself from you, placing the lasso over your head and around your body. The loop is secured tightly, and the bounty hunter tugs on it a couple of times, just to test its durability. Then, lazily, he picks up your messenger bag, swinging it over his shoulder. 

- The first time he came to me for help, he tried to domesticate a rad roach - you mutter absentmindedly, not caring if your unwanted companion is hearing you - Wanted it to help with the farm work. I had to stitch half his left side. 

- Stupid life deserves a stupid death.

- You're a fucking monster - you spit out, the feeling of Benny's blood on your lips almost making you gag.

Apparently, the Ghoul takes offense to that, because almost instantly, he's in front of you, his hand gripping your throat, and pushing you hard against the metal plating of the destroyed plane. Stars erupt behind your eyelids, as your head knocks hard into the wall, pain barely registering under the confusion.

- I have been more than accommodating to you, little princess - the Ghoul snarls in your direction, but all you can focus on, is his other hand, grabbing your bruised chin - I've entertained your little medical escapade, I let you negotiate with that dimwit over there.

The warmth of his body suffocates you stronger than any hand around your throat. You can't decide on the color of his eyes, as they seem to shift between amber and green, and completely black. Your mouth opens just a smidge, as you try to defend yourself in any way, but before you can speak, the Ghoul shoves two gloved fingers into your mouth, silencing you in an instant. 

- I could be so much worse, darlin', and I don't think you would like that - his voice lowers itself barely above a whisper, and he watches your expression shift under his grip.

You can't help it, really, the way your body reacts to this rough manhandling. It's not like you could predict being pinned to a wall by a stranger would make your thighs press together. Cooper looks down. He smiles like a cat, that's just found the fattest of mice, when his eyes drag back up to your face. 

- Or perhaps you would - his knee presses against the middle of your thighs, just short of forcing them apart, and you gasp around his fingers.

As if nothing has happened, he pulls away, so suddenly, you nearly fall over. His gloved hand glistens with your saliva, and gracefully, he wipes it clean on your shirt. Blushed, panting, and very angry at this turn of events, you stare daggers at him, as he tugs at the lasso, forcing you to start moving.  

- What is your name? - you demand, blood running hot and defiant in your veins. 

Cooper stares for just a moment too long. The way you seem to bristle in rage, even though that farmer truly was stupid, and you know it too. He likes the way your eyes harden, the way your jaw sets, when you realize this is no longer fun and games. When you recognize, how dangerous he can be, how mean and ruthless. He'd be a fool not to admit it,  it makes him feel powerful, revered. 

And the undertone of humiliation running through the length of your spine is just such a delicious addition. Almost better than chems. Almost more addicting.

Lips tugging back into a nasty smirk, he appraises you with his gaze, surprised when your resolve seems to harden even more. 

- You, Healer - your title sounds wrong coming from his thin lips, worse than any other time you've heard it - Can call me "sir".

Something akin to disgust runs through your expression, and you turn away with a grumble. 

- Fat fucking chance.

[kokokoula]

hi!!!!!! i love tsukki like i love food sooo i have an ask if they’re open!! tsukki x reader who would rather lay in bed n rot than take care of themself please 🥹

in bed for the day

a/n: i've been wanting to do this request for a while now because i totally relate. so sorry if this wasn't what you envisioned, but i hope you still like this! also to anon, please read the tags i left at the bottom of this post, i'd appreciate it 🙏

---

"it's the holidays, you should go out more!"

your parents had said previously, but, as lazy as it sounds, you solely want to stay in the comfort of your bed for, maybe, hopefully, until semester starts. you know you should take their advice, and you really wish you could, but the bed is just so comfortable, and outside is so... ew.

there's a knock at the door, and assuming it's your mother trying to get you up for the umpteenth time today, you bury yourself further under the covers.

"mum, please, for the last time–"

"hey, shortie, check again."

at that familiar snarky voice, you immediately sit up. sure enough, tsukishima stands at the door with a cocked eyebrow, unamused, and a bag over his shoulder.

"kei! what are you doing here?" your face lights up at the sight of your boyfriend.

"your mum called." he states as he settles his bag on your desk. you groan and fall back into bed.

"she called you to get me up, didn't she?"

"yea."

"i'll let you know that i refuse to leave this bed."

"i'm not going to." he interrupts as he makes his way to you. you squint your eyes at him. "huh?"

tsukishima lies down on his back beside you, staring up at the ceiling. "i'm not going to bother getting you up. knowing how stubborn you are, it's a lost cause."

you don't know whether to feel relieved or offended. "so what are you here for exactly?"

kei turns his head a bit towards you. "i'm staying in bed with you to keep your lonely ass company."

you grin widely and move over to him to wrap your limbs around him. "you love me so much."

he clicks his tongue at that and rolls his eyes, but he pulls you closer to him and nuzzles his face in your neck.

"unfortunately so."

---

tsukishima had brought over slices of cake and onigiri from the convenience store, and a large bottle of water for the both of you so that you didn't have to leave the room.

your mother really should have known better than to call him up to bring you out. after all, kei likes to hole up in his room too, and with you in his arms, he wouldn't be leaving anytime soon.

[savannahsdeath]

hi savannah! i love ur writing a lot!! 😭

can u write something about reader getting high with ellie and.. you know how some people get high and horny? yeah. you can add more if you want, i’m not really good at writing ideas sorry!

- 🐻

DEALER!ELLIE WILLIAMS X READER

mdni please<3

summary: you leave your little party with friends in order to visit your favourite dealer..

warnings: 18+!! weed n just smut

writers note: i have another bbf!dealer!ellie idea (the one i made a poll abt) but i still didnt write it and omg idk💔i swear itll be posted soon

you already smoked, quite a lot, but you and your friends agreed that's not enough. and since ellie, the best dealer in your college, likes you the most, you proposed you'll go for more.

and so you were walking through one of the biggest buildings in the campus, as close to the wall as possible, so if anything, you won't fall in the middle of the hallway, after the curfew.

you knocked on the door to her room, messier than anyone elses. you heard her swear under her breath, but she smiled as soon as she saw it's you. she softly, but firmly, dragged you inside, before anyone could notice your strange behaviour.

"look, i won't sell you anything." she immediately annouced, sounding almost disappointed.

you frowned, looking around and swinging your arms. "why not?"

"you had some already." she pointed at you, your red eyes and widened pupils. "plus, i don't trust your friends. i won't take any risks."

you smirked and playfully nudged her. "come on, i bet i'm the most responsible client you've ever had."

"maybe the prettiest one, but you're far from responsible." she shook her head with a shrug. "none of you knows when to stop."

you looked down, biting the inside of your cheek in thought, before catching her gaze again. "but you know. maybe you could-"

"no way." she cut you off with a chuckle.

you sighed and, without asking, sat on her couch, tapping your nails on your thighs, trying to come up with something.

she was visibly surprised by you - not only your visit, but the fact you still didn't leave. she said no, what else was there to talk about?

"look, you gotta give me a small amount, i'll take anything, i don't care." you replied, desperate.

you knew there's no convincing her, and you already felt the itch of a need you could barely suppress. she stared right through you, amused. your eyes already dilated. your hands shaking. the smell of her stash maddening.

you looked back at her and you knew that she was about to let you have it. but not because you asked. she was going to enjoy this.

"what if.. i'll give you one more." she smiled, rummaging through her drawers. "but you'll share it with me, not with them."

you pouted, raising your hands in confusion. "what do you mean?"

she held out a joint for you, but she moved it away as soon as you reached for it. "i mean, someone has to keep an eye on you. and i know how to, you said it yourself."

"but-"

you sighed and agreed. why not? no matter how she puts it, you knew you're going to enjoy her company, and she does have that good stuff.

"whatever you say, ellie." you replied, still pouty that you had to now share your hit. but you knew she's right, plus, you'd have to share it with all your friends otherwise.

⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂ ⠂⠄⠄⠂☆

your head was spinning and you were breathing harder. she laughed again as you coughed a little. her hand rested on your thigh, the couch you were sitting on surrounded by dirty clothes.

"feels good." you whispered.

you had weed in mind, but you realised it sounded like you were talking about her touch too late, after these words already escaped your mouth.

she looked at you with a smirk. "feeling good, huh?" her hand ran up your thigh a little more.

your mind was blown and you were way too high to figure out what to do. if that was her plan all along, it was working out perfectly.

you wanted more.

your head was clouded. you were giggling, giggling at yourself, giggling at the world. everything felt so funny and wonderful at once.

you wanted more.

you looked up at ellie and your eyes grow wide as you stared at her. she stared back at you for a few moments. you've never seen her like this.

no, that's not true. you've never felt her like this.

ellie smiled and moved a little closer to you. you could feel her presence and that's all there was.

you took another hit from the joint. and ellie was there to hold it as you did so.

you could feel her lips brush gently against your ear. you weren't sure what she was whispering. you just focused on how her hot breath tingled your neck.

she smiled. she knew exactly what's going to happen next, and she liked the fact that you could barely form any coherent thoughts, even though she wasn't much better, not at this point.

she took the joint from your lips as she looked up at you and smiled, not saying anything. she didn't need to.

she held the joint up and took a long, slow drag as you watched. sometning about it, about how the smoke drifted away when she exhaled, was just so attractive, you instinctively licked your lips. you focused on her soft breaths, making yours synchronize with hers, what helped you stay conscious.

she moved closer and you closed your eyes. you could feel her hair against your face, smell the scent of her hair.

as you opened your eyes, you realised that the world was spinning, and you and ellie were now on her bed. she had her mouth pressed up to yours.

you didn't know how long it's been going on for. maybe you just didn't care. but it felt good.

you gasped, right into her lips, as you noticed one of her hands is beneath your cotton panties. you didn't remember how it happened, but you were glad it got there. it moved synchronously to the rest of her body, but you figured out it was there just to test the waters as she started going down on you with her mouth without actually working with her fingers.

"you're even prettier when stoned." you giggled, not sure if you formed the sentence correctly, but basing on ellie's smile in response - it was understandable.

her tongue laid flat on the wet spot on your cotton underwear, making you realise your pants are on the floor. god, when did all of this happen? you didn't know there's a 'skip' button in real life, but at least you managed to come to your sense in the best moment possible.

"awh- do i really make you feel this way?" she chuckled against your clothed pussy. "i start to doubt you came here just because 'your friends picked you'.."

you hummed, twirling a strand of your hair around your finger. "you called me your prettiest client."

"and i don't take that back." she traced the hem of your panties, before sliding her fingers slightly down and caressing the outlines of your slit, barely visible through the soaked fabric. "mmh.. why does it matter now?"

"i'm just telling you- god." your hips uncontrollably raised, pressing against her hand. "just telling you, you shouldn't be surprised by this," you pointed at the surroundings of your lower stomach with your chin, "if you say things like that."

she finally, slowly took your underwear off, humming a little; "mhm". you weren't sure if it was supposed to be an answer for you, or an act of satisfaction at the view, but either one was fine.

she kissed your clit, pressing her tongue followed by her lips against it. the little touch had you moan, feeling a weird feeling of electricity starting from your core travel around your whole body. you didn't know if it was really that magic, or did the weed made you feel so much details.

she repeated this move a few times, each earning a moan or two from you. the knot you had in your head while trying to think of a way to make her sell you some more of her stuff was now in your stomach, loosening with every lick of her, now flattened, tongue. you tugged on the little bun she always had, pulling her closer to you with every small energy boost you got from time to time. you heard the sounds of your juices flow out, right to her mouth.

you squirmed under the bruising grip she had on your thighs, sometimes moving it to your lower stomach to gently press on it. when she did, you could see a spot in the shape of her hand, way lighter than the rest of your body, on the place she just left.

her eyes would sometimes look up at you, looking extremely innocent, what seemed weird compared to how her tongue fucked in and out of you.

ding!

you thought you heard sometning, but you quickly forgot about it, focusing back on ellie.

ding!

now, you were sure you heard something, but still didn't know what.

ding!

you saw your phone, laying on the floor near your pants, light up. your friends were spamming you, but your vision was all blurry and you didn't see anything. before the screen turned off again, you managed to notice one notification;

luccyy💞: idk about you, but for me, buying weed takes less than one hour