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Well, my friends, I’ve done it.
I do have to finish the Asinine Attorney cases at a later date, but I just finished the DLC of Spirit of Justice, meaning that I have officially completed all of the canon Ace Attorney games. I queue my posts in advance so my commentary on the end will post over the next month or so, but I wanted to post this one in real time.
10 games, in total. Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney, Phoenix Wright: Justice for All, Phoenix Wright: Trials and Tribulations, The Great Ace Attorney Chronicles: Adventure, The Great Ace Attorney Chronicles: Resolve, Ace Attorney Investigations, Ace Attorney Investigations 2: Prosecutor’s Path, Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney, Ace Attorney: Dual Destines, and Ace Attorney: Spirit of Justice.
50 cases, across all ten games
645 days since I first started replaying the first Ace Attorney game
And, in-universe, from Ryu’s first trial to the Sprocket’s wedding, I’ve spent over a century with the Naruhodos. I’ve walked all the way down to the end and back with them.
I have lots of people I could thank, from the people who put up with me, to even Lunchables, for giving me a free switch that gave me the console to replay it on.
But I think that right now… I’m just tired. I would like to go to sleep now.
#personal#housekeeping#it’s been… quite the journey#hasn’t it?#my followers have watched me run the full gauntlet of emotions on this one#*taylor swift voice* ask me what I learned from all those years#ask me what I’ve earned from all those tears#actually… don’t#I didn’t want to put it in the post itself#cause I wanted it to feel more positive but#I’ve earned nothing#I am walking away from this empty handed#all I’ve learned is how to squander four games of goodwill in half that time#I’ve learned what happens when you keep beating a dead horse until it stops spitting out money#I’ve learned how it feels when your childhood heroes turn into enemies#I’ve learned how much it hurts to watch something you used to love become a chore#I’ve learned how to go from playing something you love#to feeling like the only reason to keep going is because you owe it to your childhood to go all the way to the end#that’s what I’ve learned from all those years.#twenty two months of my life and that’s all I have to show for it#I guess I shouldn’t be so bitter…#it also gave me friends#a calendar for the new year#the courage to post my writing publicly for the first time in 15 years#I guess… seasons change and I do too#and that’s not a bad thing
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i kind of knew in theory that all my hobbies involved my hands but i kind of just ignored it n was like oh well im sure id manage
top ten pics taken seconds before disaster
#tldr a lot of drawing + my dorm desk is Really Bad for my wrists and i didn’t realize has kind of fucked me up bad#i don’t do basically anything all week until it stops hurting and i draw a tiny bit and it goes back to hurting#i have literally nothing to do w myself bc brain doesn’t want to do anything but draw write or game and i Can’t Do Those Things#and even when my wrist stops hurting i have to basically exchange any time i’ve earned to do my classwork#leaving no time for myself and my own work unless i say fuck it and gamble more strain#i don’t want to say it’s depressing me bc it feels. pathetic? but as someone who Has to get ideas out lest they start rotting him#it’s… not great#on top of some irl frustrations it’s made for a kind of glum few weeks#oh well. back to laying on my side watching youtube i guess#sparks speaks#vent#? yeah i guess#“i’m not depressed” says the guy who wakes up feels his hand twinge and immediately almost starts crying#like. lame ass behavior but it’s not like it’s a choice#i just wish it didn’t make me so mean. i’ve started avoiding ppl cause i’ve been getting mad rlly easily#which is not helpinggggg
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in which i take the aa-tnb pipeline and shove it into the hadron collider
#im just finishing off old stuff#i’ve had this in my files for MONTHS#i have alternate sprite sketches so if you all want i’ll clean them up and post them#WON’T ANIMATE THEM THOUGH this took so much out of me o(-(#phoenix stays in sternbild for one week as a temp lawyer for kotetsu and earns more than he has in the past three years it’s great#also consider: kotetsu being accused of murder leading to co-counsel barnaby#even funnier if they aren’t together at the time AND phoenix has his magatama#🐰: he’s nothing but a nuisance and i could care le- *LOUD CLANGING OF CHAINS*#phoenix: jesus fucking christ my ears#also phoenix hears kotetsu say ‘bunny’ and just goes 👁 👁 i think I Know What You Are#anyways#tnb x aa crossover#aka#yuri isn’t paid enough for this shit#kotetsu t. kaburagi#barnaby brooks jr#tiger and bunny#tiger & bunny#t&b#taibani#tnb#ok bye
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If you can, please spare a prayer for me.
#nothing bad. just need to decide if I’m going on El Camino with this group I was put in contact with#it’s one of those ‘‘we carry your backpack’’ socioeconomic groups I’ve mentioned#I was tangentially born into that group. but grew apart from it. they’re orthodox. just a bad rap (earned in some cases afaik)#okay now I’m rambling
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The fact that James McAvoy keeps being in random shitty action movies that get 50% on rotten tomatoes instead of like Oscar winning character pieces is wild to me because no matter the role he always performs like he’s doing Shakespeare at the globe. It’s like if they put Daniel day Lewis in ant man 3 to me. I guess that’s what happens when you’re one of the only 10 British actors cinema seems to know exists
#it’s soooo funny#like do you think he knows it’s not that serious. bc every time he plays it like it’s the end of the world#also sorry I was at the hospital for like 5 hrs today and learned nothing I’ve earned my James mcavoy posting#warlock wartalks
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so lately i’ve been obsessed with a 141 dancer au
gaz runs classes, has a youtube channel and quickly becomes one of the most sought after choreographers in the music video scene. soap is his dance partner for his classes, he helps run them and does demonstrations with him
ghost is also a choreographer and he’s gaz’s Arch Nemesis
he's famous for never performing his routines, never doing public appearances without his skull mask and being highly exclusive with who he allows to perform his choreo which earns him his name (since he’s a ghost creator). gaz however is a social media darling, his classes and videos regularly doing huge numbers
they both popped up around the same time and are neck and neck in terms of popularity and skill and they immediately rub each other the wrong way
gaz accuses ghost of not actually choreographing his routines himself bc no one has ever seen him dance and ghost thinks gaz is a clout chaser who's just in it for the fame instead of passion
he became a dancer as a way to channel his rage after years of being an underground fighter, the discipline and physicality helping him more than fights ever did. he hates the thought of someone just using it just to get famous when it literally saved his life
deep down they know their accusations are wrong and they have a grudging appreciation for the other's talent but they'd both rather die than admit it
price is a famous dancer turned director they both work with frequently and they always fight over him; trying to get their routines picked for his music videos. he's also the only one in the industry who's ever seen the ghost perform (before he got famous and before the Incident™)
he finally gets fed up with them constantly being at each other's throats and hires them both to work together and choreograph a joint routine. they're both famous in their own right but this video is for a huge artist so neither of them can refuse no matter how much they hate the other
gaz has a gymnastics background but also a ballet background which lends him to a more fluid style whereas ghost’s style is stronger, more masculine with sharper movements so they naturally end up butting heads
then there's soap who has a completely different style altogether, focusing on a more modern, breakdancer style which makes him see everything completely differently
but it also adds to his self-doubt bc he didn't have a formal dance education, he built his entire repertoire by himself. people see him as inferior to gaz who has that very formal, highly disciplined style. his insecurities about only ever being seen as gaz's demonstration partner and that he can only do gaz’s routines so all his skill is just an extension of him instead of being seen as a dancer in his own right forces him to adopt a rigid - destructive - perfectionism in himself and his body
soap meets ghost before the first rehearsal. he gets to the studio early to practice when sees this beautiful man dancing
he has no idea who he is but he moves so seamlessly, almost better than gaz, and he immediately falls a little in love. the man catches him watching in the mirror and he flusters, getting worse as the man just smirks at him and flawlessly completes the routine
soap tries to save face and asks him to teach him the routine he's doing
the man agrees, introducing himself as simon. the style of the routine is familiar to soap but he can't focus on it when simon's hands are on his waist, guiding him through the steps; his chest pressed up against his back. they work together beautifully, picking up each other's body language and dancing together easier and better than they've ever danced with anyone
then gaz arrives and the vibe in the studio immediately changes
simon's easy confidence becomes hostility, pulling up the skull gaiter he'd let hang around his neck as he practically pushes soap behind him to square up to gaz
soap’s shocked when gaz hits back with the same energy until he realises it's the same way he acts whenever he talks about ghost and his stomach drops
he steps out from behind ghost to side with gaz and the betrayal in simon's eyes hurts more than anything he's ever felt
from there it's romeo and juliet; camp gaz versus camp ghost as they fight over every step of the choreo and soap is the poor bastard stuck in the middle
soap tries to channel that “you’re my best friend’s rival, i have to hate you,” mindset but he can’t forget the way it felt to dance with simon
and how much he wants to do it again
#my friend mimi introduced me to gymnast gaz which made me think he grew up in competitive gymnastics and left it to be a dancer#whether his family was disappointed in that decision i havent figured out yet#the Incident™️ was roba getting simon directly from the underground and manipulating him into working at his strip club where price finds h#and pulls him out when roba tries to force him into sex work too#soap earned his name for being such a clean dancer and never making mistakes during performances#which just make his insecurities worse bc now he has to live up to his new reputation as well as fight of the gazs partner image hes gotten#farah and alex are definitely team gaz and i think nikolai would be his manager#then im thinking alejandro and rudy are team ghost with laswell as his manager#then bc soap is the odd man out hes used as tie breaks when they get into arguments about what move should go next in the routine#the pressure of picking correctly and the routine being essentially on his shoulders freaking him out just as much as having to choose#between his best friend who expects him to always side with him and ghost who always has good ideas#this isnt a negative haz au btw i think it would be a good way to explore his arrogance and stubborness#hes decided ghost is his enemy and nothing can pull him away from that#(except for what eventually does but im not sure what that is yet lmao)#i want soap at some point to completely overwork himself and his bad knee swells and gets irritated and finally gives out#and its ghost who forces him to take a break and convinces him that working his body to death wont help him be a better dancer#cue tender wound care and ghost backstory as he reassures soap that he is an amazing dancer#he offers soap a no stress space at his studio if he ever wants it & gaz overhears and thinks soap is betraying him and leaving so cue angs#we’re a team. ghost team#coming out of my cage and i’ve been doing just fine.txt#soapghost#ghostsoap#ghoap#john soap mactavish#kyle gaz garrick#simon ghost riley#save post#john price#cod 141#soapghost au
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will you ever go back to the target (like if they paid you a million dollars a day or something)
i mean in a hypothetical situation where they paid me a million dollars a day, yeah sure why not. but in real life they pay $17.75 an hour(up 50 cents from when i quit a year and a half ago!) and there’s another target a mile away that’s within west hollywood city limits and therefore pays $19.50 an hour. and even the second-closest target(in the same zip code as the infamous one) pays $18.25 an hour. so even if i did go back to target, it wouldn’t be that one. but here’s the thing: i will never go back to target
#when i quit i told myself. you’re not even gonna go back there to shop for at least the next 18 months#which technically either i just hit or am about to hit depending on if you use the day of my last shift or the day i actually quit#and i haven’t. except for one time in may 2023 to spend my target circle earnings#because i had like $95 and they expire so if i didn’t use them i’d built all of that up for nothing#and i don’t miss shopping there like at all lol so i probably won’t even go back to doing that#but in terms of working no. just absolutely not. everything i’ve seen about target since i quit has made me go#‘i’m so glad i don’t work there anymore’#this is a company where you can be ‘the best we’ve ever had’ (direct quote) and only get a 15-cent yearly raise#and a city where the same shithole apartment i used to rent for $1425 is now going for like $1545 or something#like…why would i go back. why would i ever do that to myself#my job wrapped
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Why are videogames hard when you put them on hard mode :(
#playing kh2 on critical mode#and like. here’s the thing.#i don’t play games on hard. i’m not here for the challenge i’m here for the story and some good times#but i really want to earn the secret ending for once so here we are on critical#i’ve gotten through every boss so far no problem (mostly)#but despite this NOT being a completionist playthrough i am still fucking incapable of finishing a kh game without collecting#every treasure chest#i just have to collect them#and i just can’t fucking get past that last nobody fight in cavern of remembrance#i leveled up specifically for this. i spent like two hours on it#still nothing#i guess i just need to level up even more :/ (i’m level 68)#i literally finished my beginner playthrough on level 67 lmao. i completed all of CoR at a lower level but oh well#kh#kingdom hearts
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Sometimes I wonder how much of myself I have to bend and shape and work around before someone will say they’re proud of what I’ve become
#I’ve done so much this year#I’ve been published as a model in a magazine and a book#my face was on display at comic con this year#I did my first ad job#I’ve travelled across the country for conventions#I’ve finally started earning money for my work#and I still feel like it’s not enough#or that this is just the standard somehow#because no one seems interested in any of this#and I’m starting to feel like all of this is just expected of someone creative and I’m stupid for being excited#sorry I had to vent a little#I’m very tired#and I feel shitty#and I want to feel talented#or pretty or photogenic or something#my copy of the magazine I’m in arrived today#and all I can think about is how many people just stared at me when I told them like it was nothing to them#or sent one word responses#and I don’t get it#vent
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THANKS PAYPAL YOU ABSOLUTE CLOWN
#apparently they’re withholding my funds#I genuinely have no idea why#but I’m out like almost a hundred n twenty dollars#I’ve called them and yet nothing gets done about it#it’s been SINCE DECEMBER. AND STILL!!!!#so anyway. fuck paypal#I’m pissed at them rn#gonna call again tommorrow#just to be a bitch about it. cause like fuck are they getting rid of me til I get my hard earned money#the squeaky wheel gets the oil and all that#whatever#I’m so annoyed#but I did get Minecraft so that’s somethin!#spotty speaks#vent post
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I thought about certain matsu holding cotton to get by and god it sounds like a cute idea but the clashing artstyles makes it hard to drawwww. I use my cool brain powers to make it appear on the screen in front of me and I don’t have to draw it
Also I tried making posts this morning and wanted to mention I feel like my spelling and reading skills aren’t getting better and it’s weird maybe I’m just tired but I’ve misread my schedule 3 times now and am my spelling is atrocious haha (thank you auto correct)
Also also wawawaaa i will try to make it to the Aggie tomorrow I should have energy then and I only got art classes so I won’t be tooo tiredddd. I would like to draw silly gross things for others again it isssss fun
#im not upset anymore im just loopy and high#feeling like I’ve earned this edible and it does feel a lot better#also anthro cotton is very light and can be held very easily#I drew them on a piece of paper with pretty gel pens#I’ll get it out eventually#of my bag I mean#I have nothing interesting to say I just feel like babbling ^w^
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sims game is working got a new job therapy is going well my med situation is getting sorted out.,,things are going too well i’m suspicious
#tmrw i’m going to treat myself to a little shopping uwu#i have just enough left in my account where i won’t feel bad spending a little and treating myself#after the literal hell i’ve been through the past five months i think i’ve earned a day where i just. do things that make me happy#without any regret#im going to go to the library and pick up some new books#and then i’m going to visit a cafe i’ve been wanting to check out#and i’m going to pick up some more packing supplies#and hopefully get a new piercing#and then i’m going to go do some shopping. nothing too crazy but maybe finally buy that dress i’ve had my eye on#buy some makeup i’ve been wanting to invest in#and i’m going to dress up in my favorite outfit#and it’s going to be great#snow.txt
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becoming more and more self aware and being someone with abandonment issues, reflecting on it more in the last few days has been bittersweet. the things that i did to ensure predictability and (toxic) stability alongside emotional self harm via honestly everything related to prior romantic experiences are sad, yeah. it’s a little funny though—like i went so far out of my way to not address abandonment issues within specific contexts that i ended up doing much more labor than i would’ve if id just stopped
#knight’s personal life#i mean. i knew what i was doing subconsciously and i thought that conditional and illusory love that had to be earned was what i deserved#i had people (several!) who knew i deserved better and told me straight up#but i am nothing if not stubborn sometimes#idk i feel a gentle amusement towards past me#they were trying. desperately. and in the wrong direction#the narratives we tell ourselves my dude#equal parts fascinating and —in my case— hilariously silly#I’ve always enjoyed self analyzing and seeing progression both in myself as a person and as myself as a bundle of narratives#anyways haha#The Ruminations u feel
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after nearly 11 years i FINALLY have a door on my room everyone cheer
#i shouldn’t be so happy and excited off of a basic thing but#i’ve been being told for said nearly 11 years i had to earn it#and nothing was ever good enough#and even as my brother was putting it on my father was annoyed because i didn’t earn it#eris: text#but anyway
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If my Xbox is done for I think I will kill myself
#tw vent#/hj kinda#I can’t stop crying#I just can’t lose this too#I have nothing!!!! NOTHING TO CLING TO#NOTHING FEELS REAL#I’m not even safe in my dreams anymore the nightmares keep getting worse#Why did I have to be born#I wish I wasn’t alive#everything is too big and scary and I’m just a kid!!! maybe I’m just a little kid!!!!#Maybe I should get to throw a tantrum and stomp my feet and cry!!!! maybe I’ve fucking earned it!!!!!!!
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When I realized I was home alone I got so excited and got all these ideas of stuff I wanted to do. And instead I’m laying here doing absolutely nothing.
#and honestly. it’s nice#the past week has been. insane#and so fucking draining#so I think it’s fine if I do nothing tonight#I’ve earned it#I rlly want to sew more patches to my vest tho
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