#or sent one word responses
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Sometimes I wonder how much of myself I have to bend and shape and work around before someone will say they’re proud of what I’ve become
#I’ve done so much this year#I’ve been published as a model in a magazine and a book#my face was on display at comic con this year#I did my first ad job#I’ve travelled across the country for conventions#I’ve finally started earning money for my work#and I still feel like it’s not enough#or that this is just the standard somehow#because no one seems interested in any of this#and I’m starting to feel like all of this is just expected of someone creative and I’m stupid for being excited#sorry I had to vent a little#I’m very tired#and I feel shitty#and I want to feel talented#or pretty or photogenic or something#my copy of the magazine I’m in arrived today#and all I can think about is how many people just stared at me when I told them like it was nothing to them#or sent one word responses#and I don’t get it#vent
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Jiang Cheng: My dad always cared about Wei Wuxian more than me 😡
Jiang Fengmian's response to a letter home slandering Wei Wuxian's character and blaming every other disciple's bad behavior solely on him:
“Wei Ying has always been like this. I am sorry he has caused you so much trouble, sir. Please discipline him appropriately.” Thus, Wei Wuxian was punished again.
—Chapt. 14: Elegance IV, fanyiyi
#mdzs#jiang cheng#human metas mxtx#lqr sent a letter to jfm#basically calling wwx a scourge on humanity#and jfm's response was 'he's like that; i don't care; punish him how you want'#is this how a parent would treat their 'most favored child'?#cause i think some of y'all's ideas of 'favoritism' are looking mighty close to 'indifference and neglect'#one day y'all gon learn to stop taking the words of self-victimizing antagonists as law
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teen wolf characters as texts i’ve sent and received
liam: he’s “foul🤢”? no he’s “✨foul✨ 🤭😮💨”
theo: seduction via dna sample collection <3
malia: unchaperoned and you can Bet my ankles will be out and about
lydia: disrespectfully where were the brain cells
mason: i love you and your delulu tendencies but be so for real right now
corey: ohh so she’s 🚨crazy🚨 not 🥰crazy🥰
scott: i’m so sorry i thought Today was Two Days Ago i am Tired
stiles: look we are Professional Shenanigists™ first and humans second
derek: get ahold of yourself, and for the love of God, don’t start crying or i’m disowning you ❤️
#teen wolf#thiam#ninety percent of these are between my bsf and me#i just want everyone to know that derek’s is word for word a text my mother sent me#in response to me going feral over 1989 (TV)#i’ve made her watch rep stadium tour too many times and now she’s paranoid i’ll be one of the peeps sobbing to shake it off#anyways my mom is an icon but i did cry to Clean TV#liam dunbar#scott mccall#theo raeken#malia tate#lydia martin#stiles stilinski#derek hale#mason hewitt#corey bryant#sterek#(lowkey in the way all my stuff is lowkey sterek lmao)
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i like overthink everything now it makes me feel so dumb. i used 2 be able to just talk 2 ppl but nowadays every single thing im like Is that actually going to make them hate me. Yes probably. and then i just dont respond which makes ppl hate me. this is how it is
#ive been overthinking 1 light and casual mildly funny response to something but im worried itll come off as disrespectful and dismissive And#make me seem stupid and uncaring all at the same time. and also be seen as insulting. but like idt itd be insulting right like. im not#saying what it is so ig for all you guys know im like I mean if i say All your shit suck ball and i hateit kys. <- thats not the thing i was#going to say#like it doesnt matter now the window for response is closed now but i feel stupid bc i shouldve just said it it was light and casual. im so#bad at keeping convos gojng im convinced im not going to survive. In like a light and casual way like in a He will not make it through the#winter joke way. dw. im not going to do anything bc i had One failed interaction. if i was going to do anythjng itd be bc of the 8000000#other failed interactions. But im not. anyways. it just makes me feel so useless 😭 like i want to respond i want to talk to ppl so bad but#i feel like i mess things up Irreparably every time i speak OR i take too LONG overthinking my response and then i just cant respond bc its#been too long and then its been 3 years and the only messages ive ever sent r my intro message and 1 message 2 years ago that nobody#responded to at all. or the conversation stopped immediately after. and like i used to be better at this i was lkke. talkative in a couple#muts servers like. i talked 2 ppl daily in those servers and i had fun and like. I was an important part of the group and i felt like it#but i just feel like such an outsider for Everything and its literally my fault bc i cant just like. Talk. The explosion. bc im always like#im gonna try im gonna do it this time im gonna get it back im going to finally be Good connor and im going to fix it all and make a Good#solid friend group and ill find HEALTHY LOVE and i wont selfsabotage and ill move out and have a job and ill balance it well and ill start#all my hobbies and ill have a great routine and be so loveable and on top of it and not stressed and content and happy and roll with the#punches and then theres a single hiccup and im like Well fuckinf whatever im going to be an unemployed hermit forever and im going to die b4#im 25 anyways so Who cares and also im digging a little hole for myself. and its like. AUGHH ik i just have to persevere and overcome but#even saying that feels so stupid its not fucking hard its Talking to ppl. like. i literally if ive ever said a word to you i had to think#avt it and strategize how to respond right even for like. like. it makes it sound like its not genuine it is#like for example i want to say hey i love your art! but then i freak out and im like thats not normal thats like a rly generic comment they#hear that all the time theyll thjnk im being polite and my brains like hrmmm rewrite Your art changed my life. It shaped me. Ill never be#the same. Nad im like ok too far overcorrected go back and the sentence generator is like Your art has colors 💯 like. GOD. WHY IS IT SO#difficult. and then usually i either just dont say anythinf and feel awful abt it 4ever OR i send it on anon and then i spend like 15#minutes ibsessively slightly tweaking the apelling and capitalization and punctuation to make sure it doesnt seem like its me just in case#it Is the worst possible thing to say but then i see the response and itll be like AWWW TYSM :] THIS MEANS A LOT or whathaveyou and i feel#stupid bc i couldve just Told them this to their face and it wouldve been a good positive interaction we had. but instead i had 2 hide and#tyoe entirely differently so they couldnt sniff me from my typing style. and it soesnt even feel like the thanks is actually 4 me bc i#tweaked the message sm. and it still makes me happy that the oersons hapoy but its like. that couldve been a nice mutual interaction#like not that i need a personal ty i compliment ppl when i Want to compliment ppl and when its genuine yk. i dont do it so i get mutualpoint
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eyes snap open guys we have a desperate lack of soulmate AUs in this fandom i fear
we have so many possibilities to work with...
hesphael soulmate AU where your first words are imprinted on your skin in the soulmate's handwriting. they first meet when theyre like 9 or younger, so they're still learning how to write and their motor skills are shit. the words on their arms are in the handwriting of their adult selves. they watch each other grow into the person that had always been promised to them by the universe.
tesilette soulmate AU where whatever you write on your skin shows up on your soulmate's as well. the first thing tesilid does in each round is to reach for a pen. every round he spends a couple of minutes or hours staring desperately at his skin for a response.
in round 17 he didn't even have to reach for a pen - she's right there in front of him. at last.
#a transmigrator's privilege#the perks of being an s class heroine#(their shared skill but make it Worse)#SPOILERS IN NEXT TAGS#when reed first reappears he doesnt reach for a pen#but he sees the divine advent and laughs#do you think ailette replies to tesilid ever since that week of returns?#bc anything she writes might get sent to both tesilids#but she cant tell which one wrote the words that appeared on her arm#(what if reed keeps writing but never gets a response?)#(is it bc ailette chooses not to respond or bc he is no longer her soulmate? bc he was never meant to have her? bc he isnt the 17th?)#(what if he is once again writing to someone who isnt there to hear him?)#and and and also before the regressions hestio and ephael know abt tesilette being soulmates#bc tesilid always looks so happy to hear from her#but once the regressions start. when he stares at his skin for a response they ask him what hes waiting for#because you've never had a soulmate? and its okay not to have a soulmate. it doesnt make you less complete#(except tesilid knows he has a soulmate. why dont they remember her?)
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Things my middle-aged mother has said that caught me off guard and made me have to pause whatever I was doing and laugh:
Huge if true
Canon
Shrimps is bugs (WHERE DID SHE LEARN THIS ONE????)
Will update as more come in
#reblogs off because she sends me tumblr posts sometimes and I won't risk this specific one taking off lmfao#my sibling and I joke that our mother talks like a twitch streamer sometimes#huge if true was in response to a meme I sent her#canon has a little story behind it#she has this ziploc vacuum sealer for her freezer meals#and I get bad brain fog and can't always remember words#so I called it the food laminator because that's basically what it does#and she said that she's calling it that now and that's its canon name now#and shrimps is bugs was in response to us discussing what seafood is acceptable to add to a country boil#I'm team 'clams/crawfish/shrimp/mussels' and everyone else is team shrimp only. hence her quoting shrimps is bugs out of the blue#I love my mother dearly. She asks me about pride flag discourse so she's certain that she puts up the right one in our yard.#she's more chronically online than I am. I love her
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Ok so the post featuring Al Haitham and Kaveh's Stupid Dumbass Relationship that I told myself I was gonna write after this ficlet like over a week ago, because like. I absolutely adore them.
They're such a hot mess! They're so weird! They're married! They're exes! They're probably the closest thing either one has to family, at least there in Sumeru for Kaveh and just in general for Al Haitham. They're probably each other's emergency contacts.
And they're so domestic, between things like furniture shopping together, Kaveh bringing home leftover food from outings for Al Haitham, and Al Haitham helping Kaveh hang paintings, but they bicker so gotdamn much that it's not even domestic bliss, it's more like. Domestic conflict. Domestic strife skjzndkdk
But my absolute favorite term for them is rivals. Like they're the type of ideal rivals you see emphasized in a shonen anime or a pokemon game or something. Kaveh and Al Haitham balance each other's traits perfectly, and they challenge and push and motivate the other in ways no one else could.
They're each other's perfect reflections! They act as each other's whetstones! They keep the other sharp and focused and in peak form! Kaveh says it himself at the akademiya extravaganza in 3.6, there is nothing more sacred to scholars than debating differing philosophies! They have something sacred with each other and fill roles in the other's life no one else possibly could!!
#genshin impact#haikaveh#kaveh#al haitham#kavehtham#i sent a big long thing about this to Ray one day and her only response was 'You're down SO bad gfhdjskl'#Me: I KNOW HELP#But it's true! Al Haitham's profile talks about this! it's part of why he took Kaveh in!!#Hoyo literally made their colors the inverse of each other because they're supposed to be reflections!!#I feel so much about them and it is so hard to put into words OTL#but do you feel me. do you understand my vision.
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this week was so long
#logbook#dude we had fungus mold clean up yesterday and my throat is still swollen. just texted fav coworker.#we had some of the biggest deliveries since may. its fall. its prime planting season. its busy time again. eugh.#also realized last night that this week contained lake day on monday. so no wonder im extra exhausted. i never had a break.#todays supposed to be hang out day. worried abt him he sent one word responses 3 times then stopped. bet he was working tho.#so exhausting being the one to push forward on communication and plans lol. come on meet me somewhere in the middle.#i couldnt sleep and have been sitting on the porch with the birds. saw our neighbor hummingbird.#also have had 2 birds throw acorns at me. and the woodpecker kept playing hide and seek.#time to send a text i guess. would rather spend my day on the porch and then nap and make food later. oh well.
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thanks for that post. 10 years of medical training, humiliation and exams, followed by lack of employment due to cutbacks to healthcare, just so I can read your reblogged little post about how doctors say they know everything and humiliate patients. And the notes about how all doctors do is tell people they're fat. Which of course is the truth 100% of the time. Right. Great. Good to know nothing I ever did amounted to anything, that my own generation hates me. Thanks for that, thanks for the anxiety attack, for making me cry on the bus home, you shitbrick. There's no good doctors, mate, you're absolutely right. This doesn't hurt anyone, we don't try to go into this field because we care, because we want to help. We just want power and money, right? Because we're famously overpaid, us the doctors? True, right? Love and peace. I wish you the best. I'm going to fucking kill myself
crazy how you’re studying to become a doctor when you can’t read
#ask#are you fr#in that post i literally noted that i have had good doctors that have helped me very much#but yes it’s all my fault you’re feeling this way. GO TO THERAPY#look im not looking to be mean. but you clearly misinterpreted my post#took it extremely personally#and then sent me this unhinged ask saying youre gonna kill yourself bc i made a post discussing how a field you happen to be in#sometimes hurts people and its a systemic issue#yes all doctors are horrible money grubbing little bastards who do nothing but lie. thats exactly what i said no misinterpretation there#dawg if ten years of dedicating your life to something can be cut down by one person on the internet#giving critique and sharing their experience#then well i dont know what to tell you. that sounds like a personal issue#sorry if youre feeling bad but i need you to realize that this is a deeply weird message to send to a complete stranger#if you would allow me to play doctor for a moment. i think you could maybe use a good long nights sleep and a snack with protein#maybe i worded the post badly. and i’m sorry if i did. i could have done better. but this is not a fucking appropriate response#you could simply open a dialogue and ask me to elaborate#ya know. learn from patient experiences so you can be a better doctor#i would have been happy to have a conversation about it and explain what i meant#but now you called me a shitbrick and blamed me for your depressive episode so. now i’m not being nice
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#i was rewatching this episode whilst stoned the other day#so my experience might have been shaped by the luxury of that experience#but like bruh...this show ROCKED#slayed shook boots the house down#it's such a limitus test of the best ways to use creative license wrt historical texts#bcus while the primary source does show that these two women said these words in some effect#the report alleges that there was some intermediary in these messages. this was the message anne sent mary vs the response mary gave#to the messenger...not that they had this sort of direct confrontation or even conversation#but of course this was the choice in how to adapt the source and without that creative choice we wouldn't have this#just...fantastic scene#the whole episode is so interesting and i hadn't realized prior that they chose it to be the same one#mary's refusal and anne deciding to manipulate henry's choice for his next mistress during her second pregnancy on her father's advice#so in that framing it was how she decided to employ defense against the unsaid threat in that confrontation#also don't @ me. she has water signs in her chart
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Hi, just saw the word prompt thing? I don't know if you're still doing them or taking them, but if you are, would you mind something with either 25: Hair or 27: Sick with Bruce and/or Jason? Thank you so much! Love your writing ❤️❤️❤️
(absolutely still taking them! see this is the problem with reblogging everything in a row instead of in a queue because that post is like three hours old or something)
"I'm not sick," Jason says, once the coughing fit is over, trying to shove himself away from Bruce without stumbling over. If he falls while Bruce is watching, Bruce will know he's lying, and then he's done for. The thought only occurs to him when he's already leaning against Bruce's shoulder.
"I know you're not, Champ," Bruce says, and it's ridiculous hearing that tone of voice when he's full on Batman mode, the cowl on with smudges of greasepaint all across his eyelids, wrapping the cape around him like when he was small. It doesn't work. The cape back then was soft, quilted one patch at a time by Alfred's careful hand, and warm enough to keep at least the chill of Gotham's winds howling over rooftops at bay. Now it's the thinnest nanofiber metamaterial Jason's ever seen, soft as silk but not half as warm.
It's a nice night. He's only cold because he has the flu, but Jason always wears a mask, so why is that his fucking problem? Nothing's supposed to be able to get through the filters. Not even whatever has Bruce so wary, using dad voice even through his gas mask. "I'm fine. There's just a problem with the filters." Is there a problem with the filters? He was coughing earlier, and something smelled deep maroon and ominous. The people shuffling around the building - no one left inside, but not so far removed yet - are coughing, too. Speaking in strange voices, like they don't know what they're saying themselves. Their faces screw up when they try to talk.
"Jaylad? Are you with me?" Bruce says, pulling Jason's full weight against his chest, as if they're not in front of a crowd right now, cameras pointed at them from all sides. Jason barely refrains from shoving him away, feeling like a little kid trying not to get hugged at school again, and aware that most of the reason he's not pushing is that he doesn't have the energy, and he needs something to balance his weight on anyhow. "How much of that stuff did you breathe in? Here, list off your siblings, will you? I don't know who's behind this new toxin, but we'll find them."
"No one's behind it," Jason says, completely ignoring Bruce's instruction, and fuck him for trying to give it, anyway, Jason is fine. "Look around at the fucking building, B, it was a science fair. It was an accident. No one was behind - okay, actually, that's a lie, Black Mask is behind it, but it's not exactly like you can throw him off a roof over it, so." Jason can throw him off a roof. Maybe. Once he gets a good night's sleep, at least. Oh, fuck, sleep sounds good, right about now. If only Bruce would hurry up and get him to the Batmobile. Of course, if he says that, Batman's going to worry. Like an asshole.
"Black Mask?" Bruce says, in horror, finally moving them in the direction of the car, finally moving Jason out of the way of paramedics that he's absolutely certain would demand to take his temperature and then the jig would be up. "What the hell does he have to do with any of it? How long has he been running this plot?" Oh, sure, once you bring Roman up, Bruce is all invested again. Couldn't have just listened when Jason said the sprinkler systems needed to be double checked. 'Oh we just checked them last week' last week before the last villain siphoned toxins through them again, yeah. Some detective.
"Well, it's not about to help to fight crime at him, B, I assure you, all of his horrifying chemicals are perfectly legal," Jason says, climbing into the chair and reclining it so he can lie down and never get up again. He almost can't hear himself over the roar of the Batmobile's engine. "Some idiot posts a video about how you can hack the blush, soak it in alcohol and precipitate out the metallic component. You know the new bronze and silver ones? Yeah. Well, if you're not careful, you know. I was checking to see if it's made of Nth metal. Some precocious teens beat me to it, I guess."
"That can't possibly be legal," Bruce says, taking a curve a little bit slower than Jason would've expected him to, even on the drive home, even while they're having a totally civil conversation and Jason hasn't yet resorted to trying to bite him. "There are all sorts of regulations on strange metals. We voted on a referendum last week! And you're telling me he's doing this through his company? To, what, entice kids to accidentally cobble together bombs?"
"He doesn't fucking care about the kids, Bruce. I don't even know if he knows - like the advertising isn't even aiming at them, it's aiming at, fuck, celebrities and influencers and shit, he probably doesn't even know it can do this or he'd be selling the shit to Wall," Jason says, tiredly, words that would be mumbled through his hands if his helmet weren't beaming them straight to Bruce's earpiece. "He just found a way to pawn off his trash to the rest of his company, and told them to come up with profits. And they did! Like you always say, crime doesn't fucking pay, eh?"
"Okay. I very much do not want Amanda Waller to get her hands on this. You really think that's his long term plan?" Jason shuts his eyes, not that Bruce can tell under the mask. Because, like, did he fucking say that? Bruce never listens when Jason tries to explain in completely straightforward English - or any other fucking thing - what is going on in Gotham. He missed the limited edition pretzels, too. Asshole. A warm gust of wind blows across his face and Jason realizes that, at some point while he wasn't responding, Bruce pulled his helmet off. Undoing all the latches silently and everything. He's saying something soothing.
Jason ignores him. Wiggles his mouth a little; it's always easier talking when you don't have to aim directly at the mic. He's used to it enough it's reflexive by this point, but it still makes his jaw sore. "Yo, you know the mayor's get kickbacks, even the new one - I mean, I didn't ask him personally, so his kickback may be, like, his own head - there's no such thing as a regulation with no loopholes in Gotham." And then the kids try to mix it up and test out cool new properties, two projects get too close to each other, someone's baking soda volcano sets of a chain reaction or whatever happened in there. The sprinklers took a beat too long to set themselves in motion, Jason knows that part for sure.
"Jay, kiddo, you sound like you swallowed an entire sheep worth of steel wool," Bruce says, in that grudging way where he's trying to show emotion the way Leslie taught him to, but he sucks at it, because Alfie's British and never made proper expressions when he was a kid. Only the thing is he's turned the car to whisper mode and Jason can barely feel the rumble of the engines now, and Bruce's hand is stroking through his hair, and he could probably fall asleep, moving car or no. "Let's get you some of Alfred's soup."
"Yeah," Jason says, even though Bruce is right for once in his life, and Jason's voice does sound a thousand times more like sandpaper now that his voice modulator is gone. "Alfred is the one that misses me, sure thing old man." Actually, who Jason really needs to talk to is Lucius. Maybe over the phone, so as not to get him sick. Because if one thing will piss Roman off it's a fucking hostile takeover. Plus then they can hoard the metal to, whatever, build a Batspaceship or who knows what, like that part matters.
Bruce's hand stills, fingertips still cool against Jason's skull, and they just breathe like that for a few moments, in sync and slow, their heart rates slowing to rest, just the way he used to after a panic attack, even though Jason's pretty sure neither of them are panicking, unless Bruce cares a lot more than he assumed about a flu he's pretty sure he's mostly over anyway. Bruce squeezes his neck a little too hard, and hesitates before he opens the door. "Alfred does miss you."
#look i said something#my writing#batman#fanfic#jason todd#prompt game link in replies#this might be a little more Batdad than you were looking for but I see the word 'sick' and hey that's what happens#thank you for this ask I think this is the first time someone's sent a writing prompt for any of the ask games I collect#(btw all old ones are still open if anyone can find them but you'll definitely have to remind me of what they are)#(also I may have to learn to do shorter responses. I can write microfiction real good I swear)
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#seraph speaks#k word use#everything going on rn is just. awful. my dash makes me sick to my stomach on a regular basis.#but i feel such immense shame at the very idea of blocking The Words even if it's for my own well-being#because then i'll be One Of The Bad Jews or whatever#honestly this site feels really really hostile again#it hasn't felt that way since i was sent graphic gore and death threats during one of the nazi raids years and years ago#and the worst part is that this unsafe feeling is coming from ppl who i generally quite like and even trust.#to make it even worse i KNOW ppl will deride and mock me for the very fact that i (a filthy fucking jew) feel terrified and unsafe rn#because ~i'm not the one being actively bombed right now~#i've already seen it happening.#and i just. am so tired.#as if this is a fucking competition? obvs i'm not saying i have it worse than palestinians#but honestly if you have the time to mock jews for being afraid rn#bc antisemitism ALWAYS spikes when israel's in the news for crimes (bc gentiles think all of world jewry is responsible for those crimes)#it's already been bad. it's going to get worse.#and if you come into my asks or my replies or w/e about this and get combative#genuinely just call me a fucking kike so i can block you#i just assume that if you have the time to bitch at random jews for the gall to be afraid rn that you aren't someone currently in a warzone#i feel like they have more important things to worry about than harassing jews on tumblr dot com.#anyways sorry for the [gestures] this#im not going to say anything else. will likely block certain words eventually as well. i'm just so exhausted and upset.#it's been all i can think abt.
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#omfg laughing so HARD!!! 🤣🤣🤣 not received a copy and pasted anon hate in YEARS#anyways i know for a fact that anon probably just sent it and then fucked off into obliviom because the wording etc just shows they defoes#dont follow my blog#but in Case they somehow are waiting for a response. as much as i want to drive you mad refreshing my blog and waiting for one#this is me here to tell you i dont reply to clearly argumentative and braincelless asks like that <3 so dont lose any sleep over it#le text post#that really did give me a hoot yall#p.s. free palestine 🇵🇸 🇵🇸 🇵🇸
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*personal
#today during our one on one my boss told me he would help me with trying to kickstart my writing career over the next year#he said he would recommend me for writer's assistant positions#he said he knows who's running the 24-25 writer's mentorship program and would put in a word when i apply this year#he if i couldn't find a script i need to read for reference he would try to find it for me#he sent me a pilot script for one of our new series and said we could read and meet to discuss character story arc and format questions#he knows i'm moving to mexico in 2025 and says he wants to do what he can to help with my career while he can#for context everyone is anxious about some industry news being reported in the trades about our company being bought by another one#and what it may mean for layoffs in our department#also he says they are testing ai workflow with a key element in our job responsibilities and that means they're prob gonna transition fully#at some point we're all gonna have to pivot#and he'd rather we both pivot to something we want to as opposed to being stuck on the same path and then layed off#so#i am gonna just prepare myself as best i can#if he keeps his word it could be even more of a transformative year for me#I won't have to do what i need to without help#in this industry knowing the right people and being prepared for opportunities is important#i'm just gonna put my head down and do what i need to
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thinking VERY hard about the exhousemate and how he never engaged with anything i made. he would sometimes like fanart i posted to twitter but only if it was his hyperfixation blorbo (or smut). during one of our failed campaigns i did a lot of speculative writing about my character because he asked me to, and never once did he acknowledge any of it. i sent him the first chapter of Eyeing an Uncomfortable Question and the only reason i ever knew he actually read it was because he verbally asked "did you see the trailer?" (in reference to the house having a basement)
its one thing to share to the void of the internet and be greeted by radio silence. its another to share a piece of art directly with someone and be greeted with a response that is somehow less than nothing.
#and he had the audacity to subtly accuse me of not reading his Princes of the Apocalypse backstory#only for it to be revealed he had never even fucking sent it to me#(with the chaser of 'its core component heavily leaned on one of my only two hard lines')#ALSO!!!!!!!!!!!!! these complaints do not include like. reasonable constraints of adult life.#when i send something to a friend and it takes a week for them to see it because we're all busy and sometimes forget things??#literally not a problem!! i sent that to u as a gift for later!!! in the same way i never ever ever expect an immediate response to a text!#no. its when i sent a link to a dude sitting in the same room as me#watched him read the whole thing with my own two eyes#and then he just closed the tab without a word.#thats what rustles my fuckin jimmies. thats what gets me salty.
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me when a new (god-tier, galaxy-brained, divinely-inspired, etc) fic gets slapped into my merlin-rotted brain:
#me: minding my own business#my brain: hey actually what if it was ygraine that lived instead of uther#it’s literally at 3 pages already JUST THE OUTLINE i literally can’t#what is it about this show that makes me go ‘hmm love it! but what if it was just slightly different 🤔’#mine#anyways itllbe a while before i have time to write or post it#i still have the rest of lesbian arthur to post (and ‘the rest’ is ummhaha. well it’s like 3 fics and several hundred thousand words)#but then i also have a pre-series like backstory that ive been building up#that one i still have to write but the outline and the few scenes i have written are ridiculously long so im expecting it to be a long fic#i would need to write that before this one i think to get a better feel for ygraine as a character#and her relationships with those around her#so much would change without uther tho! like even on a massive scale - no purge means no need for merlin to be so damn powerful right?#no uthers guilt means gorlois never gets sent off to die#and then on top of that like personally all offense i think nimueh was in love with ygraine because i say so#now ygraine is in this position where her closest and slightly homoerotic friend who is indirectly responsible for the death of her husband#and then i also personally hc that ygraine is from europe like one of the frankish kingdoms - just based on de bois#so like. not only is she ruling a VERY NEW kingdom like uther has JUST retaken the throne#this cannot be politically very stable yet. on top of that shes this outsider! i think it could be very interesting indeed#add that to the like. you know ‘when youre a child your mother is your mother. then you grow up and realize that she was a relatively young#woman. with a child’#beloved#brainrot i swear to GOD why do the worms in my brain fixate on this show instead of LITERALLY ANYTHING ELSE#anyways#merlin
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