kaiperbelt

[kaiperbelt]

if youre not in school anymore and are looking for ways to get out of the house more go to the nearest "hip" coffee shop you can that has a bulletin board with flyers on it for local events and attend any and all the ones youre able to ESPECIALLY if they're free. this is the only actionable advice that has worked for me

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we need to stand up against strong as fuck ice mummy

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there's this dog that's just bad at it. at being a dog. something must be wrong with it. the dog has a family, they love this dog, they were very excited to get the dog, and they chose this dog out of a mess of dogs in the shelter. it was cute, still is in it's own way. an adorable thing, really, a tiny picture-perfect puppy and the family was all smiles taking the dog home but it was just bad at being a dog. training was a non-issue, the dog only did their business when brought outside and the family would squat to pick up it's shit with a plastic bag, the dog never hopped on furniture it wasn't allowed to, the dog never barked, indoors or outdoors, and it never ate the family's food, never even tried to. the family thought this was wonderful behavior but there was other things about being a dog that this dog just didn't do. it didn't play, at all. never chased after a ball, never bit down on a rope. every walk with the dog felt more like dragging it around, the dog never wanting to move on its own. the dog didn't wag its tail at being told how good they were, at being petted, at given treats. it barely registered treats as anything different than its regular kibble. every meal, dehydrated meat chunks or a sneaked whirl of whip cream from one of the children, was eaten as a duty but never a fervor. it sat next to whoever brought them to the dog park and even other dogs knew this dog wasn't good at being a dog. though this dog never did have any issues with sleep, with diet, his waste always looked fine, it didn't seem anything was wrong. the family doesn't know exactly when but at some point the dog was brought to a vet, who surmised that the dog must be in some kind of pain, gave him meds, and the family didn't have to squeeze pills in cheese or anything, the dog just ate them fine. nothing changed but they never stopped giving him the meds. sometimes it'd be a different medication, a different vet with a different theory on what's wrong. some thought it was bad joints, another wanted xrays to see if it was a cancer, yet another tested for illnesses. no one ever guessed right, though. it just shouldn't have been a dog. the dog wasn't fit for being a dog. years of this go on. the family doesn't even think of getting another dog, they already have the one. the dog was fine enough, they figured. it's not in pain, not really, the dog's fine as is. a fixture of the family like a piece of furniture. it's almost kind of endearing, entertaining even, to see how long the dog just keeps going as it is. they keep the dog, celebrate each birthday with all of them there, the dog behaving as if it's any other day. four years old, seven years old, twelve years old, sixteen years old, twenty, twenty-five... then the dog bites someone. someone in the family. no real reason other than it's a dog and dogs bite. one hand bleeds as the other hand strikes the dog, a hammer of a fist making it whine for the first time. it sank fangs just once and years of dutiful love toward it collapse into a gravity of resentment. all this nerve to never act like a dog and now it suddenly wants to fucking bite someone? after all they did for the dog? all those years tolerating it? they end the dog's life without much ceremony in the backyard. they're all righteous, brimming with adrenaline, all smiles. this is right. the dog shouldn't have bit someone.

[kaiperbelt]

Excerpts from my unpublished fantasy novel The Countercumstances of West Eastershins, a Balishstar Comperwoddle novel

[kaiperbelt]

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Tigers with a frozen milk brick on a hot day

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[kaiperbelt]

hey can you guys keep an eye on my red explosive barrels while i go take a nap

do NOT smoke weed beside them

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a good mango smoothie can save your life a little

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how it feels to hard block people being even mildly annoying on my posts

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Tiktok won't stop showing me these

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I am That I am (a furry)

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joe biden: how do i look in this chef hat, giuseppe?

giuseppe, the presidential butler: waifish and breedable as always, muy lord

joe biben: fabulous. pass me the Improbable Meat

[kaiperbelt]

sigh. just another day scrubbing the floor and mowing the lawn and dusting and doing the laundry for the rest of my pack. but the house has to be in especially perfect shape today because Alpha Jameson has an important meeting with another Alpha from across the river. If they come to an agreement, the Newport and Cincinnati packs might finally have peace for the first time in decades. No more fighting….But they say the Newport Alpha is the most ruthless wolf who’s ever lived. Can our hotheaded Alpha really find a compromise with a man like that? I have to hope for the best…with a deal between our packs, the months of new business negotiations will have everyone so busy, they won’t have time to push me around. Alpha Jameson might even be too distracted to think about me. The thought is almost too good to be true. I’ve been his scapegoat to treat like trash ever since he and my younger sister claimed each other as mates. There was a time when we were kids when it was me on his arm at dinners and parties. But then we grew up, and…..I never got my Wolf. I’m a freak, and everyone knows it. Of course he couldn’t stay with me. Not that I’d want to be with him now anyway. These days he can’t even say my name without spitting it. Sometimes I think it would be easier if I never get my Wolf, and I get banished to live among humans. But then I remember my childhood best friend. She was so pretty—brown eyes, with brunette hair she always wore in a bun. I was homeschooled with my pack, of course, and she went to the local high school. We met at the library….our shared sanctuary. She didn’t have any other friends, and neither did I. We hung out every chance we got. Until one day when we were 16…her brother told me she was gone. I found out that their mom gave her away to a boy band, and I haven’t seen her since. That’s when I realized the human world is just as ruthless as the wolfen. No, banishment wouldn’t be better. But I don’t know how much longer I’ll survive this place either. Most days, keeping my head down and doing what I’m told isn’t enough to keep me out of trouble.

But things could be worse. Yesterday I overheard my sister talking to Beta Devon about the deal Alpha Jameson is making with the Newport Alpha. Apparently, he’s requested a woman from our pack as his mate. With his reputation, I could almost feel bad for whoever Alpha Jameson chooses for him, even though the women in our pack treat me even worse than the men. I’m an embarrassment to them because I don’t have my Wolf.

Whatever. At least I know it won’t be me, because I’m not important enough to be married off……..

[kaiperbelt]

I'm high as fuck at medieval times and trying so hard to look normal. My friend pointed at a QR code and went "What is the meaning of this Rune..." and I almost threw up trying not to laugh

[kaiperbelt]

Gets you with my Nice!

[kaiperbelt]