#I’ve been really sad today

[medtech-mara]

drop this sunflower🌻into the inboxes of the blogs that make you happy! lets spread a little sunshine ☀️

Eusieudgf With the power of GOD & Anime on my side, I cast RIGHT BACK AT YA!

[hana-bobo-finch]

Shoutout to this draft I made a couple hours ago when I suddenly had an epiphany for how I could fix a part of my story and I was so excited that the only way I could express it is to write whatever this is but I couldn’t post it because I didn’t have internet

also it got marked as mature for some reason

[stardustvanfleet]

soft pretty bob jakey bc i’ve been having a tough week and i miss him :-( 🩷

[fakeoutbf]

five stages of grief but it’s five stages of social anxiety

[nickfowlerrr]

it’s the way i just can’t stop randomly bursting into tears like what the actual hell

[mochiwrites]

.

[bibleofficial]

so i finally learned the beautiful man i met in may w the cancer, wasn’t away / busy bc of treatment like i thought he just. decided it was his time to go

[regular-lord-reckoner]

Today’s definitely a rough one. This is the first time I haven’t gotten my dad something for Father’s Day. Something I used to worry over because he would rarely tell you anything he wanted or needed, but it never seemed to matter in the end because he always loved whatever I would come up with and I always got to give him a big hug. I miss him so goddamn much.

I‘ve been thinking about him a lot lately and how grateful I feel to have had him as a father. He accepted me in a way few people can and like my mom always said, he let us be us.

He loved sharing in other people’s joy and congratulating them on their success, but he also gave grace and understanding during the hard times. He also taught me a lot about boundaries and what you will and won’t tolerate from others, even those you love the most or who say they love you.

He taught me a lot about people and the world and even when I disagreed with him or pushed back he made room for my perspective (and, like most children, I suppose, I’m realizing more and more every day how right he was about some things…not all, though! And I hope one day we get to continue our debates).

He was a man of integrity and honesty and I feel incredibly fortunate to have spent the time that I did with him. I’ve been thinking a lot of the trips we went on, especially the one to Chicago for one of my mom’s work trips.

While she had to go to lectures my dad and I took on the city and had so much fun just wandering around while he told me about all the architecture and we visited museums and the aquarium together.

I miss those moments. I miss him messaging me with things like, “Breakfast?! It’s here!!” and our Panera trips. I miss taking him to his appointments and sharing our music with each other during our travels. I miss him calling me over to his laptop so I could read some article he’d just found and he’d say, “Now, what do you think about that?” and I’d usually have a take that made him laugh real big.

He was a warm, gentle presence always there by my side all throughout my life and I like to think he’s still that even now.

He loved yellow flowers the best, especially sunflowers, and I feel like everywhere I go now I see yellow flowers and especially sunflowers. They’ve probably always been there, but it’s like the first time I’m really seeing them and always right when I need reassurance I’ll spot one.

I’ve always been big on the butterfly thing as well and have felt like Ashley’s paid me a visit like that many times, but this year I’ve noticed a big yellow butterfly that meets me often now whenever I’m outside and I like to think that’s him.

There are also two butterflies that like to hang out by the pool. One that’s pretty stoic and calm and the other that dances all around and is full of energy. I always say hi and thank them for coming to visit and they always just hang out for a good while before fluttering off to some new adventure.

It is hell on earth to lose people you love, especially this early on in life, but I want to do more to keep both of them alive in my memory and so I thank you for letting me ramble a while about my dad, aka Full Cup also known as Poppy.

The last thing he said to me was that I was going to have a good life and he said it with so much conviction that I believe him and it’s something I hold on to during my hardest days. Through that and all of his lessons and time he spent with me I still have him by my side and that’s a very precious gift. Thank you, Dad. This is our first Father’s Day apart but I hope Ashley’s got you something going on y’all’s end and I hope it’s spectacular!! Happy Father’s Day, Full Cup. I love you to the moon and back 💚🌙✨🌻🦋

[peculiarbeauty]

i wasn’t going to post about this here, but my family and i need a lot of thoughts and prayers if you can right now. my mom had a stroke and was rushed to the emergency room. i have been attempting to hold myself together and honestly not speak it into existence just because im so afraid. her heart isn’t well, but she is back home now resting. there’s a lot more details on the matter that led up to her having this stroke and some of that was involved stress in her work life, but im not really okay with disclosing those things on this site fully as .. it is really personal tbh.

my mom and i are so close, please send good thoughts that she gets better with the necessary healing she is going through. thanks.

[deus-ex-mona]

i miss her…

[floral-hex]

woke up at 4am feeling the weight of my life crushing me, so I’ve been sitting out in my car for the last couple of hours because I just need. to. be. somewhere else.

[seilon]

kinda wild that i know people who work at like. half the popular bars/clubs in town at this point. it makes me feel powerful

[jutsuuu]

girl help I’m experiencing

[hannahhasafact]

I truly hate all of my art right now including the thing I’m currently working on, but damn it I’m still going to finish it and post it because the concept is cute to me and maybe other people will also think the concept is cute

[femwizard]

AI “art” pisses me off for a lot of reasons

One of them is that sometimes it is good

I have some friends in the last city I lived in who run events, and they use AI graphics for their events. These graphics look really nice, are thematic, and I’m sure they took a long time to pick out and put together and the end result is a beautifully crafted poster.

And I fucking hate it.

When I was a part of these groups we weren’t using AI, it was a mix of simple text over random photos we managed to snap at an event, sometimes with a generic little gif from whatever platform we built it on, or it was a garish piece of photo shop.

It was crude and low budget and I loved it.

AI art is a tool that raises the bar for entry for artists. How could we have learned these skills if the only skill we had to use was simply asking a computer to spit out a thing we imagined.

If we don’t use these muscles we lose the muscle of creation, and we doom ourselves to generic palatability.

It just makes me sad.

Also? On a similar note it makes me sad that the existence of this stuff will just totally obliterate so many artistic styles. Remember the backrooms? And the poolrooms? Digital Impressionism and absurdism are fucked. And even if someone does decide to put in the work to painstakingly craft something like that? I’m liable to dismiss it as just some generic junk.

[gatheryepens]

So I’ve kind of been MIA…….so I thought I’d give some updates on my life