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I got a raise today 😊
#I was so excited#and#it was a whole $2 raise#I’ve been here 90 days#and they do like a trial run#if you make it to the 90 days#you are eligible for a raise#I’m still sick and have this damn kidney stone STILL#But this made me feel better
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friend wanted to see my tumblr, and when i told him i can’t show it to him bc it’s basically my personal diary he went “oh so I can’t see it but a bunch of strangers on tumblr can??” he literally does not get me. no one will get me like the people in my phone get me
#It’s just so different#even though it’s public it still feels secret and safe. i feel comfy sharing a lot more on here than I do in my actual day to day life lol#in my head I’m also just speaking to myself 90% of the time which helps#if a friend off tumblr saw my thoughts I’d feel so weird ab it#esp bc they might get the vagueposting about certain situations and tell mutual friends#no thank u. this is for me. I’m not about to start censoring my thoughts bc someone I know knows my tumblr#u guys literally saw me have LIVE BREAKDOWNS#meanwhile I’ll have the worst fucking day in history and tell no one about it. I’m already cripplingly private but way more so in real life#this is basically a low stress journaling outlet for me. it’s so important for me to maintain the separation#like this is actually my diary & has been so handy for letting out emotions / articulating thoughts / staying on track !!#& I’ve met so many kind people on here who actually get me. which is so hard to find irl bc I’m surrounded by pre-med gunners/overachievers#who are by standard not very good w emotion & can be competitive/judgmental. or at least it’s hard for me to be vulnerable in front of them#and I’m part of that crowd so I reserve my emotions only to a handful of very close friends#it’s nice to hop on here and express negative emotions!! or positive emotions!! just whatever I want and it’s low stress and people get me#I don’t have to worry about judgment or competitiveness etc etc#like everyone on here is so kind & nice & understanding. & just a breath of fresh air from the types I run w. it’s just nice to have this#so idk that’s why I think I’ll always be strict about keeping the worlds separate. it just works#p
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obsessed w That One Pic of them rn
#i know the colours are fucked but this was meant to be my silly 90 min sketch of the day and suddenly it’s 3:30am and i’m deathly dehydrated#so i won’t look at this anymkre and i NEED to post it before i slee#p#anyway i’ve been doing the daily silly sketches on bsky but often forget to post them here too so feel free to follow there too#my @ is the same everywhere#art2 and craft2#phanart#dan and phil#dnp#daniel howell#dan howell#amazingphil#phil lester#phan
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where is my fat husband
#stream#i’m lonely !!!! i want a man !!!!!!#me: where’s my man#me at the same time: not leaving the house nor dating apps & also is having a mental breakdown everyday while self medicating#also i’m 90% sure my meds are starting to fail again ALSKALKSLAKSLAKLSAKLSMAKSKK#ANYWAY#i didn’t even go to gay bars when i was allowed to drink like 😭😭😭#it’s all a bunch of straight people#there’s no point#like i constantly here old queens going ‘young gays don’t do xyz’ or ‘don’t know how to xyz’ like ok girl its because that shit died like#idk probably before the pandemic truly it was dying but the pandemic was the nail in the coffin like girl …….. i turned 21 a month into#lockdowns like#ok so i did stuff illegally & went to other shit but it still was straight bars 90% of the time there’s like 6 gay bars in houston total 😭😭😭#like idk what they expect like if … those venues aren’t there & are increasingly AGAINST doing the goofy tings …. how would the YOUNG KNOW#like at this point idk i truly think that it’s kinda on the elders at this point ALSKALSKLAKSAKSLAN like yea they’re boomers at the end of#the day so like i’m not saying that they didn’t have it hard they did they did ok but. get over it ? ALSKALSKALKSLAKSLA like alright … but#i’m saying this as someone who knows the history & bullshit like ok yea everyone needs to understand what it’s like to have your community#die before ur eyes but at the same time. there’s no community now ? ALSKALSKALKSLAKSLAKSLLA like girl …#girl …….#yall HAD a community but now all that shit is gone & none of us young ppl have any funds to make that 😭😭😭#like girl i have 12$ in my bank account i dream of being able to rent a flat at some point like a ONE BEDROOM u know W A LIVING ROOM & yall#own rentals so like this is UP TO YALL …..#like ur the problem ? 😭😭😭😭😭#@gays for trump & loghouse republicans i’m looking at YALL#a lot of these mfs are liberal too - pro invasion of iraq democrat back the blue bootlickin NIMBA faggots 😭😭😭💔#anyway that’s just me bitching#i’ve been so fucking IRRITABLE today
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ok. these past few days i’ve sort of… took a trip down memory lane and fallen down the queen rabbit hole again..?? there have been a lot of changes in my life but somehow i ended up watching the entire montreal recording again two days ago and i put on live at the odeon in the background today. and then i realized oh wow i forgot how much i love queen. and damn i love the guitar. two-years-ago-me had incredible taste.
#i can’t believe it’s been more than two years help#i’ve also read a bunch of stuff i posted two years ago and wow… i for sure was severely mentally not okay💀💀💀#i haven’t used tumblr in so long#i have a goldfish’s memory lmao 90% of my queen knowledge had been somehow stored in this back corner of my mind so i’ve had a lot of blasts#from the past these past few days😭#i forgot iilwmc was a song until a few days ago lmao😭#i’m surprised to see a lot of the people i follow are still active omg????#but i am like a newborn navigating queen again so please don’t hold ANY expectations from this blog lmao#i’m gonna take it slow and try to digest what happened these past two years💀 also i’m occupied w a lot of other stuff in my life rn so i’m#not gonna spend a lot of time here (probs)#but wow… i love queen.#i think there are just gonna be 5 people max who actually see this post anyways
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Beautiful risings Lottafans…
#꒰💬꒱ ❝ Dear Diary… ❞#who up uh. uhhhhhh.#so here’s the thing. for the last what few days or so I’ve been working on a Surprise for my friends#(I realize basically announcing the surprise kind of ruins the novelty of the surprise)#obviously I can’t go into too much detail lest I spoil too much#I wanna say I’m like. 3/4ths of the way through ?#but WATCH OUT! the bizarre guilt of not being immediately done#I dunno. I kinda have this weird feeling if I don’t get it immediately done before Saturday I’m letting everyone down#I realize that line of logic makes little to no sense but you have to realize#that as someone with untreated OCD this is how my brain operates 90% of the time#but alas… I’ve been so busy with school and I’m kinda stretching myself a bit thin and tiring myself out#I wanna try to get the last of it done after school today. we’ll see#sorry for the yapping LOL
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omg skz’s new album is fucking good ahhhhhhh
#┊glimpse into the crystal ball ೃ༄#you could say they ATE#it’s been on repeat the entire day#also the ryan and hugh cameo in the mv is so endearing#i want to crawl into this album and never come out#i’ve been starved for serotonin in my playlists lately since i’ve started skipping 90% again#(yk the feeling where you want to listen to music but nothing seems appealing?)#skz is here to safe me#also the chk chk boom mv literally killed me#you can’t open it with jisung looking so fucking fine and expect me to be okay afterwards#also hyunjin in the red sunglasses took me out#i have a weakness for them fr#it also helps that hyunjin was literally crafted by the gods#bang chan and felix stealing hearts like always#and changbin just never misses with his parts#and neither does jisung it’s so insane#seungmin and jongin slaying those vocals too#ugh imagine not stanning talent couldn’t be me
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Spending all me money on games :>
#bought these two on the same day and I’m so excited to finish both of them#I wanted the physical release of Metroid Prime remastered but scalpers got to it sadge#people are selling it for 90 here and uhhhh no 💖#I wanted to play it but not THAT bad I will wait#I’ve been wanting okami forever so I used the cash to get it instead#the art style is SO beautiful and I am a sucker for good style#and I heard it’s a cult classic so win win#also been having great fun with Kirby#pink orb game go brrrrrrrrr so much serotonin#snappy speaks
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I NEED TO MOVE OUT NOOWWWWWWW
#i woke up at 3 pm bc this was my 1st day ‘off’ in forever#and when i went to grab something to eat our back door was fully open and my car was nowhere to be found#cat*#so i freaked out and started looking outside but when i realized she wasn’t there and my roommate also wasn’t recently outside#i knocked on her bedroom door and she was like ‘oh sorry i was asleep do you want me to help look’#YES i want you to help look what are you talking about#eventually i found her bc my cat is the best girl in the world and never left our yard- she was in the crawl space under the house#but not only am i pissed she let my car out then took a nap#but we don’t live in the safest city in the world and while we were both sleeping our door was fully 90 degrees open#so now not only do i feel like kevin (cat) isn’t safe here but I don’t feel safe sleeping here anymore#the lease is up in july and i finally get to leave#this girl is a random roommate my former roommate found to replace her#and the whole process/experience has been awful#i just have to survive 4 months#during the summer i might keep paying rent but fully leave and go live with family#bc my school isn’t in driving distance of any of my family#now i’m thinking about asking someone if they’ll take kevin for a couple months bc im so sorry about her#but my dad has a dog that doesn’t love cats and my best friend is allergic and my mom lives in another state#personal#delete later#also this is unrelated BUT every weekend without fail she does laundry at an insane time in the morning#and our washing machine is the loudest washing machine i’ve EVER heard#and of course it’s right against the wall of my room#not hers#i only get two days a week to sleep past 630 am and she almost always ruins it
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calling my doctors office on a whim to set up my appointment before i talk myself out of it and their office is closed boooo
#🍄.txt#i know it’s probably for lunch but whyyyy#they won’t let me refill my meds anymore after this next one until i come in person 🙁#my doctor didn’t even prescribe the 90 day refill my insurance covers so i have to pay the 30 day prescription instead out of pocket 😕#she hates me fr they’ve been telling me to come in since december 🫣#like listen. the lexapro is working but i don’t know if it’s to the degree where my stomach won’t go haywire just stepping foot inside#the waiting room#literally just thinking about it is making me more nervous than i’ve been in a while 😭#need to make use of that therapy referral fr like hmm maybe the medical trauma Won’t go away on its own if i just ignore it#me when it physically hinders me from taking care of myself and going to the doctor ❤️ this is fine#being chronically ill the last few years made it so much worse because now it’s happening to me more directly. lol#get me out of here (< my body) ❤️
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Gotta love when ppl make snarky comments about u still wearing a mask at work (around a bunch of elderly people, and audibly very sick snotty ass people queued up at a pharmacy all day everyday) like my body literally and at times scarily doesn’t work right since I had covid and I eat well - not overweight or old. (only worth saying because those are the excuses they use otherwise ur fine) It’s not ‘a cold’ for a lot of ppl, and if it was congrats a lot of ppl don’t walk away the same and just because you’re a self righteous fucktard doesn’t take away the fact that it’s pretty serious for many. Yes - even still. Fuck off.
#the health issues I’ve had since and still have like let’s switch bodies then and u can suffer instead#been through so much hell and hospital trauma since#looking like a whole chronic illness at this point fun times#there’s so many other ppl having similar issues rn it’s not that uncommon#not knowing how you’ll feel day to day#scary shit sometimes man#hopefully someday it gets better i’m hoping for that#still have testing to do I go fri for something#hopefully I’ll live 🤙🏻#but like how diluted#I also wear it at work to protect the lil old ppl in here#because I do a lot out in the world at times and l'd hate myself if I had it and gave it to someone who couldn't fight it off#bitch I barely fought it off I can't imagine being 90#lots of old ppl up in here#and some are my lil friends#either way worry about yourself ugly
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crazy how ‘lidl’ is ‘aldi’ spelled backwards
#stream#i walked the mile to the aldi that i’ve been passing consistently like every other day for the past 8 months & i went there today to#actually u know. use the shop & i got there & it wasn’t even aldi. it’s a lidl#like it’s not even ‘oh there’s no sign out front’ there’s multiple signs. there’s a big one at the front. on the road. an arrow pointing at#the building saying ‘LIDL’ but i’ve always went :) yes :) aldi :) good to remember :)#then i tried finding my mask realized i lost it somewhere & turned around & walked the mile back home ALSKALKSLAKSLKSLKSLAKA#i’ve done nothing today#woke up -> got high -> the guy that i agreed to go on a date today a few days ago actually …. followed up on that ALSKALSKLASKLAKSLAKSLA ->#showered -> went -> came home -> remembered i needed almond milk -> made multiple different plans to different stores to buy it -> bite the#bullet & go buy it -> can’t -> go home -> floor time#this was like 5p & i’m still here just miserable in my mind trying not to start crying lmfao#anyway#i need to eat but i don’t want to#i’ve been looking at pasta online like ‘online shopping’ u know when ppl would go on forever21 & fill the cart then close the window#me w pasta & bread & noodles & grain#ALSKALKSLAKSLKSLAKSLAKSLA like ‘yes … one day i will actually eat it and keep it down’#‘i don’t count calories !!! i read the nutrition label uwu’ the calories are on the nutrition label#girl#it’s not even that i ‘count calories’ bc i DONT i’m BEYOND that im just ‘ok well it has more than 100 calories pass’ like ok if it has 100cl#& it’s 90% protein i’m like ok but then i read carb & go heheheh …. no ALSKALKSLAKSLAKSLKSLAKSLA#ITS SOOOOO BADDDDDDDDDDDDD#like can u eat. bread#like i do i eat chipatis but its bc ive CONNED MYSELF into believing that ‘ok well its not bread its basically a fork’ AKKLAKSAKSLAKSLAKDLAK#the only thing i hate more than bread is having to do dishes#why do i hate pasta & noodles & rice ? bc i’ve to cook it &. no thank u ?
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#i swear#one of these days i’m gonna grow some balls#and stop helping beginner witches#because they ALWAYS argue over the effectiveness#of a spell they’ve never done!#‘that doesn’t work’#SAYS YOU!!!!#90% of witches and occultists i’ve met in the last decade have said otherwise#do you think that you#in your two months of research#know more about a spell you’ve never done#than people who’ve been doing that spell for a decade?#someone call MIT!!#we’ve got a genius over here!!
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#oh boy#was in a social group zoom thing this evening#and we were reviewing the guidelines for fair conduct and all of that whatnot which comes with being in a talk-based group#and someone took issue with the use of and definition given for the word ‘crosstalk’#saying that they’re in a 12 step group and ‘well ackshually ‘crosstalk’ means this’#to ‘well ackshually’ a ‘well ackshually’#the definition they gave is just what you generally see in zoom step groups *these days*#there is no definition of ‘crosstalk’ as handed down from the world service office#in other groups I’ve been in that aren’t 12 step#the general notion of ‘crosstalk’ is talking over the top of one another#or interrupting#usually to disagree or add an opinion or offer unsolicited advice#it doesn’t mean ‘you can never comment on what someone else said’#or ‘you can never add to the point someone made in the the thing they just shared’#maybe it does in that person’s particular step group#but it really depends on the individual social group of any particular flavor#the group itself must decide how to phrase the concept of ‘being a rude pushy dolt’#and for a lot of groups the word which sums it up best—esp in environments where talking over each other is made very easy—is crosstalk#i have no problem with them making a point or sharing the definition that they’re familiar with#but it’s not law handed down from on high by Bill Goddamn Wilson#fortunately someone else with some experience of in-person groups from the ‘90s was able to give their opinion#yes i said something but in more of a ‘here’s my experience and here’s what other groups I’m in have to say about this concept’#but I’m happy to report that i didn’t roll my eyes#12 step principles and conduct is my trigger to deal with#and so I’m dealing with it here by writing a fucking essay in the tags because buhhhhh my gaahhhhhd#okay#the 12 step hater is laying down the microphone gently as to reduce the feedback and squealing and not hurt y’all with my personal issues
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When I first joined Tumblr, I had no idea what I was walking into. There’s no manual for navigating this wild, untamed corner of the internet. My first moment here? I was greeted by an image completely naked, no warning, no explanation. It was just there, bold and unapologetic. That’s when I realized: Tumblr is a place where anything can happen.
But for all its chaos, Tumblr has become something far greater than I ever expected. For us Palestinians, this platform isn’t just a space to scroll through memes or vent about life. It’s a lifeline, a place where we’ve taken the raw, messy energy of this site and turned it into a battleground for survival. Here, we tell our stories, raise funds, and fight for our lives.
I’ve seen campaigns soar past their goals, bringing hope to families barely holding on. But I’ve also seen campaigns like mine, ones that fight tooth and nail for every single dollar, every reblog, every addition, and every ounce of hope. My family’s lives depend on this.
It hasn’t been easy. Zionists flood all Palestinian words with hate, twisting truths and spreading lies. They aim to discredit us, to make people doubt us. It’s exhausting. Some nights, I sit with my phone in my hands, wondering if this fight is too big for me. But then something beautiful happens: a donation comes through, a kind message appears, or someone I’ve never met reblogs my story with words that feel like a warm embrace.
And through it all, people are starting to see the truth. The hate doesn’t drown us; it sharpens our voices. Every day, more people step forward to stand with us, to say, “I see you, I hear you, and I’m with you.” It’s those moments that keep me going.
To everyone who has already helped, whether through verification, donating, wrting post , reblogging, or simply sharing a kind word: thank you. You’ve done more for my family than I could ever put into words. But the reality is, we’re not there yet. My family is still waiting for a chance to breathe, to live without fear, to fill their empty stomachs with warm food, and to wrap themselves in clothes thick enough to keep out the bitter cold. They’re hungry, they’re freezing, and I can’t do this alone.
This fight is hard, but it’s not hopeless. Strangers have become friends, and friends have become family. Some of you have shown up in ways I never imagined, treating my family’s survival as if it were your own. That kind of solidarity? It’s powerful.
Tumblr might be chaotic, unpredictable, and sometimes downright bizarre, but it’s also the place where we’ve built something extraordinary: a community that refuses to look away from injustice. With your help, we can take this fight all the way. My family’s lives are within reach, and together, I know we’ll get there.
This campaign isn’t just about me. It supports 26 people, including two orphaned children and an injured family member suffering from hemiplegia after being hit by shrapnel during a bombing. Surgery is desperately needed to replace the infected and failing plates. The needs are urgent, and the future of 26 lives depends on your support.
The video showing the injured family member is shared before in this post: Link.
Please help us ! Donate and reblog this post to spread our story.
Vetted and shared by @90-ghost: Link.
Verified and shared by @el-shab-hussein: Link
Listed as number 282 in "The Vetted Gaza Evacuation Fundraiser Spreadsheet" compiled by @el-shab-hussein and @nabulsi : Link
Listed on the Butterfly Effect Project, number 957: Link
Additionally, Al Jazeera News has documented apart of my family's case: Link
If, for some reason, you couldn't donate via GoFundMe, you can donate via PayPal instead. Please keep the conversion rates in mind when donating through GoFundMe. Every 100 SEK is equivalent to 10 dollars, and 200 SEK equals 20 dollars and so on.
Note: There’s even a raffle for a handmade Palestinian thob if you want to participate : Link
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