#I’ve been here 90 days
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I got a raise today 😊
#I was so excited#and#it was a whole $2 raise#I’ve been here 90 days#and they do like a trial run#if you make it to the 90 days#you are eligible for a raise#I’m still sick and have this damn kidney stone STILL#But this made me feel better
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friend wanted to see my tumblr, and when i told him i can’t show it to him bc it’s basically my personal diary he went “oh so I can’t see it but a bunch of strangers on tumblr can??” he literally does not get me. no one will get me like the people in my phone get me
#It’s just so different#even though it’s public it still feels secret and safe. i feel comfy sharing a lot more on here than I do in my actual day to day life lol#in my head I’m also just speaking to myself 90% of the time which helps#if a friend off tumblr saw my thoughts I’d feel so weird ab it#esp bc they might get the vagueposting about certain situations and tell mutual friends#no thank u. this is for me. I’m not about to start censoring my thoughts bc someone I know knows my tumblr#u guys literally saw me have LIVE BREAKDOWNS#meanwhile I’ll have the worst fucking day in history and tell no one about it. I’m already cripplingly private but way more so in real life#this is basically a low stress journaling outlet for me. it’s so important for me to maintain the separation#like this is actually my diary & has been so handy for letting out emotions / articulating thoughts / staying on track !!#& I’ve met so many kind people on here who actually get me. which is so hard to find irl bc I’m surrounded by pre-med gunners/overachievers#who are by standard not very good w emotion & can be competitive/judgmental. or at least it’s hard for me to be vulnerable in front of them#and I’m part of that crowd so I reserve my emotions only to a handful of very close friends#it’s nice to hop on here and express negative emotions!! or positive emotions!! just whatever I want and it’s low stress and people get me#I don’t have to worry about judgment or competitiveness etc etc#like everyone on here is so kind & nice & understanding. & just a breath of fresh air from the types I run w. it’s just nice to have this#so idk that’s why I think I’ll always be strict about keeping the worlds separate. it just works#p
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where is my fat husband
#stream#i’m lonely !!!! i want a man !!!!!!#me: where’s my man#me at the same time: not leaving the house nor dating apps & also is having a mental breakdown everyday while self medicating#also i’m 90% sure my meds are starting to fail again ALSKALKSLAKSLAKLSAKLSMAKSKK#ANYWAY#i didn’t even go to gay bars when i was allowed to drink like 😭😭😭#it’s all a bunch of straight people#there’s no point#like i constantly here old queens going ‘young gays don’t do xyz’ or ‘don’t know how to xyz’ like ok girl its because that shit died like#idk probably before the pandemic truly it was dying but the pandemic was the nail in the coffin like girl …….. i turned 21 a month into#lockdowns like#ok so i did stuff illegally & went to other shit but it still was straight bars 90% of the time there’s like 6 gay bars in houston total 😭😭😭#like idk what they expect like if … those venues aren’t there & are increasingly AGAINST doing the goofy tings …. how would the YOUNG KNOW#like at this point idk i truly think that it’s kinda on the elders at this point ALSKALSKLAKSAKSLAN like yea they’re boomers at the end of#the day so like i’m not saying that they didn’t have it hard they did they did ok but. get over it ? ALSKALSKALKSLAKSLA like alright … but#i’m saying this as someone who knows the history & bullshit like ok yea everyone needs to understand what it’s like to have your community#die before ur eyes but at the same time. there’s no community now ? ALSKALSKALKSLAKSLAKSLLA like girl …#girl …….#yall HAD a community but now all that shit is gone & none of us young ppl have any funds to make that 😭😭😭#like girl i have 12$ in my bank account i dream of being able to rent a flat at some point like a ONE BEDROOM u know W A LIVING ROOM & yall#own rentals so like this is UP TO YALL …..#like ur the problem ? 😭😭😭😭😭#@gays for trump & loghouse republicans i’m looking at YALL#a lot of these mfs are liberal too - pro invasion of iraq democrat back the blue bootlickin NIMBA faggots 😭😭😭💔#anyway that’s just me bitching#i’ve been so fucking IRRITABLE today
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omg skz’s new album is fucking good ahhhhhhh
#┊glimpse into the crystal ball ೃ༄#you could say they ATE#it’s been on repeat the entire day#also the ryan and hugh cameo in the mv is so endearing#i want to crawl into this album and never come out#i’ve been starved for serotonin in my playlists lately since i’ve started skipping 90% again#(yk the feeling where you want to listen to music but nothing seems appealing?)#skz is here to safe me#also the chk chk boom mv literally killed me#you can’t open it with jisung looking so fucking fine and expect me to be okay afterwards#also hyunjin in the red sunglasses took me out#i have a weakness for them fr#it also helps that hyunjin was literally crafted by the gods#bang chan and felix stealing hearts like always#and changbin just never misses with his parts#and neither does jisung it’s so insane#seungmin and jongin slaying those vocals too#ugh imagine not stanning talent couldn’t be me
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Spending all me money on games :>
#bought these two on the same day and I’m so excited to finish both of them#I wanted the physical release of Metroid Prime remastered but scalpers got to it sadge#people are selling it for 90 here and uhhhh no 💖#I wanted to play it but not THAT bad I will wait#I’ve been wanting okami forever so I used the cash to get it instead#the art style is SO beautiful and I am a sucker for good style#and I heard it’s a cult classic so win win#also been having great fun with Kirby#pink orb game go brrrrrrrrr so much serotonin#snappy speaks
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I NEED TO MOVE OUT NOOWWWWWWW
#i woke up at 3 pm bc this was my 1st day ‘off’ in forever#and when i went to grab something to eat our back door was fully open and my car was nowhere to be found#cat*#so i freaked out and started looking outside but when i realized she wasn’t there and my roommate also wasn’t recently outside#i knocked on her bedroom door and she was like ‘oh sorry i was asleep do you want me to help look’#YES i want you to help look what are you talking about#eventually i found her bc my cat is the best girl in the world and never left our yard- she was in the crawl space under the house#but not only am i pissed she let my car out then took a nap#but we don’t live in the safest city in the world and while we were both sleeping our door was fully 90 degrees open#so now not only do i feel like kevin (cat) isn’t safe here but I don’t feel safe sleeping here anymore#the lease is up in july and i finally get to leave#this girl is a random roommate my former roommate found to replace her#and the whole process/experience has been awful#i just have to survive 4 months#during the summer i might keep paying rent but fully leave and go live with family#bc my school isn’t in driving distance of any of my family#now i’m thinking about asking someone if they’ll take kevin for a couple months bc im so sorry about her#but my dad has a dog that doesn’t love cats and my best friend is allergic and my mom lives in another state#personal#delete later#also this is unrelated BUT every weekend without fail she does laundry at an insane time in the morning#and our washing machine is the loudest washing machine i’ve EVER heard#and of course it’s right against the wall of my room#not hers#i only get two days a week to sleep past 630 am and she almost always ruins it
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i’m gonna put a hole thru the wall
#my fucking mom always does this#whenever it’s her turn to do laundry she never finishes it and tells me i have to or else she’ll ground me#and whenever it’s my turn i have to finish all of it myself or else she’ll ground me#and now that i’m done and thoroughly pissed off bc now my knees hurt and i’m overstimulated by the fans downstairs#she wants me to go out in almost 90 degree heat to help do yard work#bitch i haven’t had a break in four days bc i’ve been either working or hanging out with friends#i’m so fucking tired today’s supposed to be my break day before i have to work again tomorrow#i don’t want to have to go outside and get all sweaty and shit#plus i won’t even be able to take a shower right away bc she always gets in the shower first bc mines broken so i have to use hers#and she takes fucking forever#i’m gonna kms i swear to fucking god i’m so upset right now#i never get a fucking break around here#vent tw#k.txt
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calling my doctors office on a whim to set up my appointment before i talk myself out of it and their office is closed boooo
#🍄.txt#i know it’s probably for lunch but whyyyy#they won’t let me refill my meds anymore after this next one until i come in person 🙁#my doctor didn’t even prescribe the 90 day refill my insurance covers so i have to pay the 30 day prescription instead out of pocket 😕#she hates me fr they’ve been telling me to come in since december 🫣#like listen. the lexapro is working but i don’t know if it’s to the degree where my stomach won’t go haywire just stepping foot inside#the waiting room#literally just thinking about it is making me more nervous than i’ve been in a while 😭#need to make use of that therapy referral fr like hmm maybe the medical trauma Won’t go away on its own if i just ignore it#me when it physically hinders me from taking care of myself and going to the doctor ❤️ this is fine#being chronically ill the last few years made it so much worse because now it’s happening to me more directly. lol#get me out of here (< my body) ❤️
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Gotta love when ppl make snarky comments about u still wearing a mask at work (around a bunch of elderly people, and audibly very sick snotty ass people queued up at a pharmacy all day everyday) like my body literally and at times scarily doesn’t work right since I had covid and I eat well - not overweight or old. (only worth saying because those are the excuses they use otherwise ur fine) It’s not ‘a cold’ for a lot of ppl, and if it was congrats a lot of ppl don’t walk away the same and just because you’re a self righteous fucktard doesn’t take away the fact that it’s pretty serious for many. Yes - even still. Fuck off.
#the health issues I’ve had since and still have like let’s switch bodies then and u can suffer instead#been through so much hell and hospital trauma since#looking like a whole chronic illness at this point fun times#there’s so many other ppl having similar issues rn it’s not that uncommon#not knowing how you’ll feel day to day#scary shit sometimes man#hopefully someday it gets better i’m hoping for that#still have testing to do I go fri for something#hopefully I’ll live 🤙🏻#but like how diluted#I also wear it at work to protect the lil old ppl in here#because I do a lot out in the world at times and l'd hate myself if I had it and gave it to someone who couldn't fight it off#bitch I barely fought it off I can't imagine being 90#lots of old ppl up in here#and some are my lil friends#either way worry about yourself ugly
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I should neverrr have accepted this shift. Literally every problem I have would be irrelevant if I didn’t have to go to work today
#guys it is fucking SNOWING in MARCH. we have got flurries and we have got 2 inches already on the ground#and ya girl works ✨at an extremely remote nature preserve which is accessible only by a winding country road that will PROBABLY NOT BE#GRITTED and also who the fuck is going to visit in this weather?? 90% of the activities you can do there involve BEING OUTSIDE#(the other 10% is gift shop and food; the latter of which i am partly responsible for. but like. realistically does anyone go there for food#it’s more like you’re there anyway and you get hungry so you might as well have a coffee and/or a sandwich. we are not starbucks. no one is#coming to me for a machine cappucino and then just leaving because they got everything they came for. it’s more like you come to see some#wildlife and then you see me in my apron looking bored next to a coffee machine and a display of cakes and you think ‘might as well’#the only people coming here specifically for food and then leaving are the people who buy the too good to go bags#and even THEY usually hang out on the reserve a bit. like. you’re here. might as well go see a gannet or two)#so????? to summarise i don’t even know if we’re open today. nobody tells me anything. plus my shift doesn’t even start until 11:30 anyway#my mom’s friend who lives close by is doing a reccy for me but i can’t imagine she’ll find anything pertinent unless she goes at opening#time; which isn’t for another hour#i’ve formed a plan. if no one calls me by 9:45 (past opening time) i’m going to call them and be like ‘hey i’m not coming in; i can’t#physically get there. my village hasn’t been gritted [true] and is basically an ice rink and i’m worried if i get there i might just be#stuck there [also true]. record it as an unpaid absence if you want because i’m not sick or anything’#i’d literally be amazed if they opened tbh. like we’ll get zero customers. they’d have to pay me ~£50 if i went in and will they even make#£50??? a very good question. PLUS there’s two other people working in the cafe with me. and my manager. that’s like.. a solid £200 of wages#on a day when we’d be unlikely to get enough customers to make £200. no way they’ll open; and if they do they won’t want me to come in#like girl what is the point of me coming in to cover the lunch service if we’re basically not going to DO a lunch service lmao#i shouldn’t have accepted this shift when it was offered to me. i should’ve been like ‘no girl i can’t because i don’t want to ❤️#good luck tho’#anyway. we’ll see what happens i guess#personal
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crazy how ‘lidl’ is ‘aldi’ spelled backwards
#stream#i walked the mile to the aldi that i’ve been passing consistently like every other day for the past 8 months & i went there today to#actually u know. use the shop & i got there & it wasn’t even aldi. it’s a lidl#like it’s not even ‘oh there’s no sign out front’ there’s multiple signs. there’s a big one at the front. on the road. an arrow pointing at#the building saying ‘LIDL’ but i’ve always went :) yes :) aldi :) good to remember :)#then i tried finding my mask realized i lost it somewhere & turned around & walked the mile back home ALSKALKSLAKSLKSLKSLAKA#i’ve done nothing today#woke up -> got high -> the guy that i agreed to go on a date today a few days ago actually …. followed up on that ALSKALSKLASKLAKSLAKSLA ->#showered -> went -> came home -> remembered i needed almond milk -> made multiple different plans to different stores to buy it -> bite the#bullet & go buy it -> can’t -> go home -> floor time#this was like 5p & i’m still here just miserable in my mind trying not to start crying lmfao#anyway#i need to eat but i don’t want to#i’ve been looking at pasta online like ‘online shopping’ u know when ppl would go on forever21 & fill the cart then close the window#me w pasta & bread & noodles & grain#ALSKALKSLAKSLKSLAKSLAKSLA like ‘yes … one day i will actually eat it and keep it down’#‘i don’t count calories !!! i read the nutrition label uwu’ the calories are on the nutrition label#girl#it’s not even that i ‘count calories’ bc i DONT i’m BEYOND that im just ‘ok well it has more than 100 calories pass’ like ok if it has 100cl#& it’s 90% protein i’m like ok but then i read carb & go heheheh …. no ALSKALKSLAKSLAKSLKSLAKSLA#ITS SOOOOO BADDDDDDDDDDDDD#like can u eat. bread#like i do i eat chipatis but its bc ive CONNED MYSELF into believing that ‘ok well its not bread its basically a fork’ AKKLAKSAKSLAKSLAKDLAK#the only thing i hate more than bread is having to do dishes#why do i hate pasta & noodles & rice ? bc i’ve to cook it &. no thank u ?
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#i swear#one of these days i’m gonna grow some balls#and stop helping beginner witches#because they ALWAYS argue over the effectiveness#of a spell they’ve never done!#‘that doesn’t work’#SAYS YOU!!!!#90% of witches and occultists i’ve met in the last decade have said otherwise#do you think that you#in your two months of research#know more about a spell you’ve never done#than people who’ve been doing that spell for a decade?#someone call MIT!!#we’ve got a genius over here!!
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#oh boy#was in a social group zoom thing this evening#and we were reviewing the guidelines for fair conduct and all of that whatnot which comes with being in a talk-based group#and someone took issue with the use of and definition given for the word ‘crosstalk’#saying that they’re in a 12 step group and ‘well ackshually ‘crosstalk’ means this’#to ‘well ackshually’ a ‘well ackshually’#the definition they gave is just what you generally see in zoom step groups *these days*#there is no definition of ‘crosstalk’ as handed down from the world service office#in other groups I’ve been in that aren’t 12 step#the general notion of ‘crosstalk’ is talking over the top of one another#or interrupting#usually to disagree or add an opinion or offer unsolicited advice#it doesn’t mean ‘you can never comment on what someone else said’#or ‘you can never add to the point someone made in the the thing they just shared’#maybe it does in that person’s particular step group#but it really depends on the individual social group of any particular flavor#the group itself must decide how to phrase the concept of ‘being a rude pushy dolt’#and for a lot of groups the word which sums it up best—esp in environments where talking over each other is made very easy—is crosstalk#i have no problem with them making a point or sharing the definition that they’re familiar with#but it’s not law handed down from on high by Bill Goddamn Wilson#fortunately someone else with some experience of in-person groups from the ‘90s was able to give their opinion#yes i said something but in more of a ‘here’s my experience and here’s what other groups I’m in have to say about this concept’#but I’m happy to report that i didn’t roll my eyes#12 step principles and conduct is my trigger to deal with#and so I’m dealing with it here by writing a fucking essay in the tags because buhhhhh my gaahhhhhd#okay#the 12 step hater is laying down the microphone gently as to reduce the feedback and squealing and not hurt y’all with my personal issues
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If you voted, here’s a chance to help a palestinian family right now
€11,790 raised out of 40,000 goal
I’ve shared Nader’s @abdalsalam1990 family’s fundraiser on here many times, but they are still only 25% to their goal
Nader is only a 17 year old child, but spends every day reaching out to people and trying to get help for his brothers Abdulsalams fundraiser for their family. His father suffers from cancer and needs treatment he can’t get in Gaza to survive, and his little niece is only 1 year old and suffers from malnutrition. It’s very urgent to get them help. You can read more about their story in my post here
Nader works very hard every single day to get his family to safety because he loves his family, and any family would be lucky to have a son and brother like him. But no child should have to do this just to survive. He should be going to school and hanging out with his friends. You can help take that weight off his shoulders. Please help bring the Al Anqar family to safety.
This fundraiser has been vetted by gazavetters, number four on their spreadsheet.
every donation counts!!
@brutaliakhoa @toesuckingoctober @dirhwangdaseul @furiousfinnstan @neechees @90-ghost @heritageposts @dlxxv-vetted-donations @gazavetters @khanger @autisticmudkip @beserkerjewel @biconicfinn @willgrahamscock @shesnake @akajustmerry @butchniqabi @biconicfinn @pikslasrce
#txt#free gaza#free palestine#palestine#b00st#mutual @id#palestinian gfm#gaza gfm#evacuation funds#save gaza#save palestine#humanitarian aid
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To Those Who Still Hold Onto a Shred of Morality and Humanity - Stand with Us and Don’t Forget Us.
Over 40,000 lives have been lost, with 70% of them being children and women. Among these numbers are my own family members—many of whom I’ve already lost.
My family, my cousin, aunt, their children, and grandchildren were all directly targeted by Israeli airstrikes. I’m sharing a video of my aunt and cousin to reveal the harsh reality we are facing in Gaza. In this video, my aunt bravely shares her story about how the Israeli army airstruck them along with their children and grandchildren. Even if you don’t understand Arabic, just watching her speak will help you grasp the immense suffering we are enduring in Gaza. You can see the vedeo in this post.
The few family members who remain are in grave danger, and I’m terrified of losing them too. We have a chance to make a real difference and give my 24 surviving family members a chance to live.
In Gaza, jobs are non-existent, and nonprofit organizations like the UN have drastically reduced their work on the ground. Basic necessities such as milk, food, and medicine are almost as expensive as gold. My family is struggling to afford even the essentials, and my mother urgently needs medication that we simply cannot afford.
I’m also sharing another video that shows the daily struggle people face just to get clean water. The suffering here extends far beyond my family; it’s a genocide affecting every aspect of life in Gaza.
Thanks to the generosity of those who have already donated, we’ve raised $535 toward our goal of $190,363- august 17th. I’m deeply grateful to each of you, but we still have a long way to go, and I need your help more than ever. Imagine if it were your family—how would you feel if they were in this situation?
For those who have created special posts or reblogged to amplify my voice, thank you from the bottom of my heart. Your support means everything to me and to my family. If you haven’t yet shared our story, please take just one minute to do so. Your voice could be the lifeline my family desperately needs.
You cannot continue to treat human lives as mere numbers. This is a genocide that demands immediate action. How many more should be killed before you all wake up? Will 40,000 lives be enough to stir us to action? 50,000? 100,000? 150,000?
Asking for donations and charity is something we never imagined having to do in Gaza before the war, and it’s heartbreaking that it has come to this. But if everyone who saw my last post donated just $10 or $20, we could reach our goal in no time. If you’re looking for a way to contribute, consider giving up your coffee, tea, or other “cup” for one day, one week, one month, or anything in between. Then, donate what you would have spent to help me. Please help us and donate now!
This is about more than just donations—it’s about preserving human lives and upholding our shared moral values. Your contribution can make a world of difference in our survival and ensure I don’t lose more of the people I love.
Demanding an end to this suffering is a matter of basic humanity. You cannot remain neutral in the face of such genocide. Please, let’s stand together. Enough is enough.
Every donation, no matter how small, brings us closer to hope and healing. Thank you again for your kindness and support. I will never forget it.
Vetted and shared by @90-ghost: Link.
Verified and shared by @el-shab-hussein: Link
Listed even as number 282 in "The Vetted Gaza Evacuation Fundraiser Spreadsheet" compiled by @el-shab-hussein and @nabulsi : Link
Additionally, Al Jazeera News has documented apart of my family's case: Link
Important note: ** 105 Swedish kr is just 10$ ** 1050 Swedish kr is just 100$ ** 10500 Swedish kr is just 1000$
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#gaza#palestine#free palestine#genocide#palestinian genocide#all eyes on gaza#humanity#charity#donate#humanitarian aid#gaza genocide#free gaza#help gaza#pray for gaza#poltiics#current events#deadpool#deadpool and wolverine#olympics#gravity falls#the umbrella academy#interview with the vampire#iwtv#donald trump#kamala harris#joe biden#ffxiv#acotar#art#artists on tumblr
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