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Holy Ground - Chapter 2
Summary:
Nobody knew that Azriel found his mate. Until she nearly died. This is the aftermath.
Warning:
Rhys Bashing (as usual), Inner Circle Bashing (kinda), Referenced/Implied Sexual Assault, Referenced/Implied Domestic Violence, Discussion of Religion(?), Chronic Injury/Pain/Illness, Minor Character Death (It's probably nobody you love), Magical Work Accidents, Explosions, Injuries
If any of this triggers you or makes you uncomfortable, please take care of your own mental health and don't read it.
Azriel’s shadows liked to spoil his mate rotten.
Not that Azriel could find anything wrong with that.
She deserved more for putting up with him.
More than new tea from the Dawn Court and her favourite chocolate covered, wafer thin cookies from a small bakery near the Sidra…more than the occasional embroidery thread they snuck her…More than whatever animal he went to go hunt, to cover his bed in even more furs just for her.
He nearly had enough Sable furs to have a blanket made for her for Winter Solstice…
Azriel also had half a mind to go sneak in her office later that day.
Just as a treat for not killing either of his brothers. For being civil.
Rhys had come over for sparring, unnannounced.
Azriel had hoped to have some peace and quiet today, but it seemed like Rhys had other plans.
Currently Cassian and Rhys were wrestling with less sense than they had had when they were just kids, and Azriel was cleaning his weapons, watching from the sidelines.
Azriel couldn't help but roll his eyes at the sight of his brothers roughhousing. It was typical of them to turn a simple sparring session into some kind of ridiculous competition. He focused on sharpening his knives, trying to ignore their antics.
"You know, we could also actually train properly," he called out, his tone dry. "Instead of wrestling like a bunch of children."
Cassian looked up from his grappling with Rhys, grinning. "Oh, come on Az. Don't be such a stick in the mud. Loosen up, have a little fun for once."
Azriel's expression remained impassive. "I'm perfectly capable of having fun, Cassian. But I prefer to do so without rolling around in the dirt like a wild animal."
Rhysand chuckled, standing up and clapping Cassian on the back. "It's good to let loose every now and then, Az. You should try it sometime. It might make your brooding sessions a little less depressing."
Azriel just grunted in response, not willing to engage in a verbal sparring match with Rhys. He continued to clean his weapons, hoping that the training session would end soon so he could escape his brothers' teasing.
“When did you even come home yesterday?” Cassian asked him.
Azriel looked up from his work, his expression neutral. "Around 11," he said simply.
“You didn’t come to dinner,” Rhys pointed out. “You were missed.”
He highly doubted that.
And maybe he had made that mission in Dawn just a little while longer, so that he knew that dinner would be over and when he came home, he wouldn’t need to be alone.
Azriel just shrugged. "I was busy," he said, offering no further explanation. He knew his brothers were just trying to rile him up, and he wasn't about to give them the satisfaction of a reaction.
*Are you still pissed of at me?* Rhys asked him mentally with a sigh. *I get it. But you don’t need to avoid everybody else, just because…*
*I’m not avoiding anyone,* Azriel replied, his mental voice tight. *I’m simply choosing to spend my time how I see fit.*
“I was busy,” he repeated aloud.
Cassian rolled his eyes. "You're always busy, Az. You know, there's such thing as taking a break once in a while. Spending time with your family."
Or he could spent time with his mate. He could spent time with his mate, who let him brush her hair and even braid it …who pressed kisses to his horrible scarred hands and smiled at him.
If it was a choice between Irena or a family dinner where he didn’t want to stay longer than an hour or two, because he was still too fucking pissed off at Rhys…the choice was easy.
“Or is there a special somebody?” Cassian teased him.
Azriel glowered at him. "It’s none of your business." He went back to working on his weapons, his expression tense.
*You can’t keep panting after Elain for the rest of your life,* Rhys said mentally. *Look, I know I didn’t…I am sorry. But she’s happy with Lucien and…*
*Don’t worry, I’ll go to a pleasure hall and pay for it if I want to fuck somebody,* Azriel shot back viciously.
Or his own hand would suffice. More than suffice, especially if…especially if Irena had let him kiss her the evening before…sometimes he waited until she disappeared into her room, and he buried his face in the pillows that smelled like her, fisted his cock and rutted like an untried boy for seconds before he came all over himself.
It was still better than any other sex he ever had had before.
Cassian raised an eyebrow at him. "It sounds like you need to get laid," he said, chuckling. "Maybe that'll help with your bad mood."
Azriel shot him a glare. "Mind your own business, Cassian. My love life is none of your concern."
Rhysand gave him a sympathetic look. *We just want you to be happy, Az. You deserve happiness.*
“Ohhh, touchy,” Cassian said with a snort.
Azriel just gritted his teeth, his temper rising. "Cassian, if you don’t shut your mouth right now, I swear to the Mother, I’ll shut it for you."
Cassian just grinned at him. "Come on, Az. I’m just teasing you. Lighten up."
Azriel's grip on his weapons tightened. "I don't like your teasing, Cassian. And I certainly don't appreciate you making assumptions about my personal life.”
Mostly he just wanted his brothers to leave him the hell alone.
And then...then before he could say another thing...he felt the shaking.
And then the sound came. An eardrum shattering explosion, the very foundation of the House of Wind shaking. It was terrifying him.
Irena was down there in her office. Nesta was in there.
He was moving before he was even thinking.
*Merrill's office, Master!* the shadows screeched.
Azriel was already running.
Cassian hot on his heels, so was Rhys.
Azriel was faster, heaving shadows around his limbs as he rocketed down the spiral stairs of the House of Wind.
Level Two, Straight to the right. Clearly...Clearly the epicenter of the blast. Of the explosion…of whatever had happened.
He pushed as hard as he could, legs burning as he hurtled down the hallway to Merrill's office.
He wasn't the only one. "Merrill!" He could hear Gwyn's shrill voice screaming, coming to a stop in a hallway of what had once been Merrill's office but now was just...
It was a mass of wood and rubble.
He barely slowed down, scrambling into action. Gwyn was already digging through it, so where Nesta and Emerie. Cassian landed behind him, immediately moving some of the debris.
His shadows swarmed as he and the others quickly dug at the rubble. Looking, desperately looking.
He moved another piece of rubble out of the way...a piece of blue cloths. The same blue cloth that he knew covered Irena's body, the scent of poppies clinging to her...Without a thought, he grasped and then dragged, a hoarse shout that was her, that was her...
He felt as if he were choking, as if he were drowning as he dragged out her body. Bloody, bruised, broken but still...still there was a faint flicker, a faint, thready heartbeat.
His heartbeat pounding in his ears, he tried to pick up on her heart. There was barely a flicker. Too fast, too faint, she was barely holding on. Barely hanging by a thread.
There was blood pooling on her abdomen, dying the blue dress she wore bright scarlet red, He put pressure on that wound immediately, leaning on her with nearly all his weight, his fingers slick with blood. "Damn it, stay with me, love," he demanded sharply.
Azriel felt like he could barely breath. Like he was falling, tumbling down as he tried to will her to stay with him. Stay. Stay. Stay. Please stay. Stay...
Rhys was there suddenly, checking her pulse. "Breathing is erratic. She's in shock," he told Azriel with a grimace. "Mor is getting Madja..."
"Az..." her voice was so weak, but he turned to see dark brown eyes watching him, brows furrowing.
"Just keep breathing, Love," he told her, trying to stop his voice from shaking.
He could barely hear what was going on around him. It was as if he were in a bubble, a world of just himself and her and the desperate beat of her heart under his fingers.
"I am sorry," she whispered.
"There is nothing you need to apologise for her, Irena," he promised her sharply. "Absolutely nothing."
Irena's eyes drifted shut. Azriel felt like something was dying inside him as her heartbeat fluttered against his fingertips. His world was collapsing, shattering into pieces as her breath stuttered.
"Stay. Just stay..." he was barely aware of what he was saying, his eyes frantically searching hers. She had to stay. He would do anything to keep her here. Anything.
"I am still owing you that flight," he told her. She hadn't let him take her flying yet. They had snuck away in the library...in the rooftop garden...in her office. But he had never gotten to take her flying. He had never gotten to take her out into Velaris. They had never had a date at a fancy restaurant, had never gone to see the symphony. There were thousands of things that he hadn't yet gotten to do with his mate, because they had all the time in the world.
Irena just stared at him, her eyes pleading, as her heartbeat slowed, fluttering weaker and weaker. Azriel felt a sharp pain in his chest as fear clawed at his spine. "Just hold on a little longer, love," he whispered. "Please."
And then there Madja. Thank the cauldron. There she was.
Azriel could barely manage to let go of her, his mind consumed with the singular thought of Irena's laboured, erratic heartbeat as he moved back. Madja immediately set to work.
He lunged for her head, lunged to pull it on his lap, to touch her with blood slick fingertips, her normally rosy red lips pale, her skin even whiter than usual.
"Hurts," she whispered, as Madja set to work, barking orders.
"I know, I know, love," he whispered, touching her cheek with his fingertips as Madja got to work.
His eyes searched hers as he murmured those words over and over, as if he could somehow hold her in this world through sheer force of will alone.
"We haven't had enough time," he whispered desperately, leaning his forehead against hers.
She was slipping away. He could feel it. Feel her slipping, feel her heartbeat slow. Feel the thread that tethered her to this world fray, fray, fray...
No. He couldn't lose her. Would not let her leave him. He had waited far too long for her. Far, far too long to let her slip through his fingers.
"Stay with me," he pleaded. "Please stay with me."
But her eyes were slipping shut, her head lolling to the side. He gently patted her cheek, trying to urge her back to consciousness, but he didn't think he was even really aware of what he was doing, where he was. The world had boiled down to a desperate litany, in his head. Stay...stay...please...don't you dare...
“I am going to be so furious with you if you die. We may have our first fight,” he told her fiercely.
He needed her to know that he would be there to be furious with her if she dared to die, that she couldn't die. Couldn't. That she had to stay. Had to keep fighting. There were too many things ahead of them...a wedding to plan, children to have, years and years of life to live.
“Az,” she breathed his name, her eyes not even open anymore.
“Open your eyes, Irena,” he demanded. “Look at me, love,”
Her eyes finally fluttered open at his command. It was barely more than a slither of brown, but he latched onto it, taking it for what it was. A chance. A moment to get through to her.
He wasn't sure what he was saying, but the words spilled forth from him, a litany, a desperate prayer. "Please," he breathed, "don't go...don't you dare..."
He was dimly aware that the others had gathered, but he didn't dare look away. Didn't dare look away from her as he cradled her head, trying to pour all of his prayers into those words. All of his hope and desperation.
"You can't go." A statement. An order. An absolute certainty in his voice. "I will not let you go."
He wouldn't. Would never, ever let her go. Would drag her back from the Cauldron's grasp with bloodied and broken hands if thats what had to be.
She didn't speak. Didn't need to. He could read her answer in her eyes, the determination in those brown eyes as she tried so, so hard to stay.
It was as if she were holding on for him, because he had asked her to. Because it was him there with her. Like she would fight until her last breath because he told her too. He didn't deserve this beautiful creature, who was willing to fight for him, willing to live for him.
It was something primal, something desperate, something fierce as he whispered those words over and over, like a prayer. "Fight. Fight. Fight."
And she listened. She did. He could feel her hold on, just barely grasp hold of that tether that kept her in this world. Just barely keep her eyes open.
Just look at him.
And she did, those dark eyes unfocused but open, staring up at him, watching him. Trying so, so hard. It nearly made his heart stop in the most terrible way that she was struggling for him.
And he was so proud of her. Of the way she was fighting like she was. Of the way she was grasping, hanging on to life like she was.
The seconds stretched too thin, feeling like eternities and only the slightest of moments. But her eyes were open, if only barely. She hadn't given up. Hadn't let go.
He was dimly aware of the others, Gwyn hovering with a worried expression, Madja murmuring quiet instructions to the others, Rhys kneeling not far away. But he barely glanced at them, barely dared to take his eyes off Irena.
He was certain that if he looked away, if he let this tenuous thread sever, that she would die. That as long as he kept her here, she wouldn't slip, wouldn't let go.
He had one hand on her cheek, her skin still clammy and pale, as her eyes slipped open and shut. But everytime, they would find his face. His eyes, like he was the only thing tethering her to the world. It hurt. Hurt so much to see her barely holding on, only that last sliver of determination keeping her here.
"Please," he pleaded, whispering those words like a prayer, like he would be praying to a vengeful god. Those moments felt like eternities, stretching on and on with only his desperate whispers. "Please..."
The world felt so still, so silent as if the world was holding its breath. Azriel's eyes locked on Irena, silently begging her, asking her to please, please...
Live, live live... he whispered those words over and over, a desperate plea to the Mother, the Cauldron, to anyone who would listen. To Irena, the only person in the entire world who truly mattered in that moment.
Her eyes were growing glassy, slipping closed only to jerk open again. Stay he demanded. Keep looking at me. Please.
She tried. Mother, she tried. Her eyes drifted to him, the smallest hint of life, of a spark there in those dark brown eyes.
He hardly dared to breathe, hardly dared to move. Afraid that any wrong move could tip her over the edge, could pull her into that chasm of non-existence that she was desperately clinging too.
He felt something pricking at his eyes, felt something in his chest cracking, breaking at the sheer intensity of emotions thrumming through him. It hurt. Hurt so much to see her like this, so pale, barely holding on, barely conscious...
“Alright,” Madja said quietly. “Good girl. You were so very brave.”
"Will...will she be alright?" He asked, voice hoarse.
He didn't let his eyes drift from Irena's face, her half lidded eyes staring at him. It filled him with such an intense pang of relief and fear at the same time. Relief, because she was alive...and fear, because they had been so close to losing her.
"She's not out of the woods yet," Madja warned. "But she'll make it. She lost a lot of blood. It will take some time to get her vitals stable again."
He felt like he could breathe for the first time. It was almost dizzying, the sheer, intense relief that flooded through him. Irena was here. Irena would live. It filled his veins with an almost drug like euphoria, that made him light headed, a smile twitching at the corners of his lips.
He barely managed to keep that feeling in, the pure euphoria from showing as he smoothed a strand of hair back from her face. "Thank you," he whispered, voice hoarse, eyes finally dragging away from Irena's face to look at Madja. "Just...thank you."
He looked back at Irena, taking in her face. Alive. Still alive. Still here with him, not gone. The tension seeped from his shoulders, a strange sort of exhaustion taking over. As if all the adrenaline that had fueled him, the fear, was slowly draining out of him like water.
“Merrill,” Irena whispered, her voice near silent.
Azriel felt his fingers brush her cheek, just the gentlest touch as he tried to keep it together. It had been too close. Too, too close. He couldn't stop the overwhelming feelings flowing through him of elation and fear as he looked down at her as he looked down at her, alive. Alive and breathing and whispering soft words. "Shhh," he whispered softly. "Save your strength. Don't strain yourself."
He looked up finding Cassians gaze who just shook his head. Merrill was dead.
Azriel couldn't quite process that information, not in that moment. His eyes were still drawn to Irena, still unable to take his eyes off of her for more than a moment. His fingers brushed her cheek again, just the faintest touch as he pressed a small kiss to her forehead. "Rest," he instructed softly. "I'll be right there.” He promised.
“Being here to her room,” Madja said quietly.
“My room,” he corrected.
The priestesses dormitory was locked from males. If he even tried to get in there it would’ve end well for him. And he wouldn’t leave her side.
“Your room?” Gwyn asked sharply.
“Gwyn,” Rhys said quietly.Azriel didn't even acknowledge Gwyn's words, didn't have the energy. All he could focus on was the way Irena's eyes had drifted shut, the steady rise and fall of her chest. She would be alright. She was going to be alright. She was alive. Right now, in that moment, thats all that mattered.
“Az, how long have the two of you…” Cassian asked hesitantly.
Azriel just shrugged, his hand resting on Irena's hair, smoothing back from her face. “Two years. She’s my mate,” he said flatly as he gathered her up.
“Mate,” she rasped. “Mine.”
“Yours,” he agreed softly.
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I miss my husband Ratchet owo
Wasn’t sure which doc, so went with TFP
The Weakends Pt 8
TFP Ratchet x Reader
• Stretching slowly, it’s the feel of something heavy against your back shifting against you that brings you wide awake. Relaxing when you realize you’re sprawled inelegantly on Ratchet’s red and white chassis, his servos draped across your back. He’s still out as you lift your head enough to see his face and you rest your chin on him to watch him, unwilling to wake him. As exhausted as you were, he’d been nearly dead on his peds and he needs this. Always pushing himself, driven to take care of everyone else and neglecting himself.
• There’s a spot of warmth on him, something soft under his servos as he comes back online. Starting to sit up and catching you against him when you start to slide. “I think that’s the longest I’ve ever seen you recharge,” you say as he grimaces and wonders how long he’s been out. He hadn’t meant to rest so long, used to recharging in short intervals at his desk, sometimes drifting off while working on research. How long has it been since he’s had any significant rest in his actual berth? Usually his mind is too busy, keeping him wound up. But somehow having you there, feeling the beat of your heart kept him still. “You really need to take better care of yourself, doc.”
• You wait for the cranky grumbling, but he just touches a servo to the back of your head in a gentle bump as a rebuke and sits up completely, warm servos pinning you in place. “We need to check on Bumblebee,” he says, but he doesn’t move or shift his grip on you. Like he’s reluctant to start the day. Leaning against his warmth, you listen to the hum of his spark. Feel his servos flex against you before he vents tiredly and slides off his berth.
• “I don’t think I’ve been so mad at someone as I was at you,” you say as his peds hit the ground and he pauses to look down at you. Your little head is leaned against him, avoiding his optics. “Do you know how hard it is to see someone you care about just not give a damn about themself?” There it is, the root of your anger before. The truth. That it wasn’t his grouchy act that set you off, it was because of the way he pushed himself. Working himself to exhaustion again and again, because of course you’d noticed. Even knowing you, being around you, it’s so easy to forget how observant you are. Always looking to him.
• “I’m fine.” Liar. It’s pretty much what you expect from him, though, to play it off. Everyone else so much more important than his own health and happiness. You expect it, because you understand it all too well. It’s the same way you worry over those three kids, anxiety cranking you tight when they leave with the bots and you want to go with them to watch over them, because they’re just kids. And they’re so easy to overlook, a wrong step, a wrong move? You hate that they might be in danger. Wanting to take care of them and Ratchet, all of the bots. Because as dysfunctional as this is, it feels like a family and you want to protect that.
• “Yeah, so am I,” you mutter in a tone that clearly says that you aren’t. At all. He can feel those walls going back up, but admitting the truth? That he’s so tired of this war, of fighting? That he just wants something to break their way. A place to call home once and for all where he doesn’t have to watch friends die right in front of him. He can’t say those things. Not without cracking wide open, because that anxious worry is all that’s keeping him together. That and you.
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I don’t like how this art has turned out, but I don’t think I know how to make it better.
He doesn’t need an introduction, I guess.
#death note#labb murder cases#death note another note#beyond birthday#my art#also this post was meant to break the silence#just for a moment#because after that I’ll have to go back into my void#I’m too busy with work and home and health care#to carry the burden of controversial topics I tried to talk about before#if I return to them#it’s not going to happen until April I think#I am sorry
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The Temporary Assistant [Higuruma Hiromi]
an: I’ve been obsessed with the exhausted lawyer for some time now, but this is the first time I’ve written a fic for him… please be kind cause I baby.
pairing: Higuruma Hiromi x female reader
warnings: NSFW, pwp, established relationship, reader is assumed to be a little bit on the booby side, pseudo boss/subordinate dynamic, spit as lube (don’t do this folks), Higuruma is a breasts man, nipple play, little prep, cumshot
Masterlist
“She quit. What do you mean, she quit?”
Higuruma massaged his tired eyes in steady circles, huffing out a laugh at your exasperated questioning and the equally perplexed look on your face.
“Darling, I don’t know how else to phrase it other than the young lady no longer works for me,” he offered with fatigue lacing his tone. It was late, and he didn’t want to be having this conversation for the third time today. The first had been with his partner at the law firm they jointly owned, and the second with the agency supervisor his previously employed assistant worked for.
Nanami hadn’t been surprised at the news, a fact that bothered Hiromi more than he cared to admit. His partner was not one for pulling his punches, so Hiromi was accustomed to his sometimes blunt manner of speaking, but it still hurt to think that Kento had seen something coming that he had been blindsided by.
“I’m only surprised she lasted this long.” Those were his parting words as Hiromi stalked dejectedly back to his office at Nanami’s insistence that his assistant would be far too busy to spread her attention to them both. Not words he’d been happy to hear.
“Oh, I’m sorry, Mr Higuruma. That’s not like her, but I’m afraid it’ll be at least two weeks until I can provide a replacement.” The agency supervisor sounded genuinely shocked at the sudden resignation, and his day simply went from bad to worse.
Hiromi flopped onto the couch, his head lolling back with his eyes sliding shut from the weight of his fatigue. It had been mounting all day, and now that he was home, where he should be finding solace in the comfort of his surroundings and his loving wife’s embrace, he was hit suddenly with a fresh reminder of the shit he’d landed in.
A soft hand caressed the side of his neck, inducing a shiver of relief. It was followed by the weight of your body settling over his spread thighs, your head resting against his shoulder. His suit jacket still hung from his lithe frame, the button undone and the shirt beneath badly wrinkled from the long commute home, but you didn’t care about his untidiness.
He felt every quiet exhale fan his throat, the ghost of a smile finding its way to his face despite it all. Your nimble fingers burrowed into the knot of his tie, loosening it until you could pull it free and toss it away. “What are you going to do, Hiromi? I know you have that court date coming up… it’s a busy time. How about Nanami’s assistant?”
“Not an option. I already tried,” he muttered with a shrug.
Opening his eyes, he peered down at you tucked into the crook of his neck, a hand inside the collar of his shirt and your nails grazing gentle patterns over his collarbone. He chewed his lip, fearful to broach the idea planted by his partner when his foot was almost out the door. “You could always ask your wife…”
Selfishly, he indulged himself in your affections, your scent that permeated every corner of the home you shared and let his fingers, stiff from the cold, warm against your feminine curves. You might not be so keen to indulge him once he suggested you work as his temporary assistant, so he would take what he could until push came to shove.
“Your fingers are icy, Hiro. Come here,” you chided with a click of the tongue, though he knew it was only born of concern for his health. Hiromi hummed happily, grateful when you pressed his palms together with yours on either side and blew hot air to dispel the chill.
“What would I do without you?” He whispered, sitting upright and nudging your nose with his when you glanced at him. Hiromi’s eyes drooped, heat dusted his cheeks at the proximity, and when you let out an airy giggle… he swore he swooned all over again. Just as he had when he first met you and fell in love.
He doubted he would be in the position he was today had it not been for you. Hell, he wasn’t sure if he would be here at all if he hadn’t met you when he did, but that was a story for another day.
You admired the side profile of your husband, eyes low and hazy with appreciation of his strong jaw and prominent nose that hooked just so at the end. “Good thing you’ll never have to know.”
Hiromi groaned aloud, burying his face between the soft skin of your décolleté. His cool lips skimmed the tops of your breasts, first on one side then turning to the other, making you shudder and hum. Your fingers threaded through his black hair, tugging firmly at the roots just how he liked, and his hips jerked in response.
A great fuck and a good night’s sleep would fix him, you were certain of it. It wouldn’t resolve his work issue, but Hiromi worked better with a clear mind, and you knew it was murky as bog water right now. Your man was a brilliant lawyer, dedicated to working towards a more just legal system for those normally underrepresented along with his partner, but he was a terrible workaholic.
You couldn’t count the nights he traipsed home from the office at an ungodly hour only to drag his tired body into his home office to continue where he left off. Only coming to bed when you physically dragged him away from his keyboard and desk with threats of pain and not the kind he typically enjoyed.
It couldn’t be easy to be his assistant, though you knew damn well that he was a good man. The poor girl probably had enough of the endless expectations and incessantly long hours which were necessary to get through all of his demands because he refused to finish at five like normal people. On the few occasions you’d stopped by his office, you could see the fraught expression written all over her young face and how her eyes pleaded with you to distract her boss enough so she could catch up with the mountain of requests waiting for her attention. Poor girl…
Ready to go to town on your poor overworked and stressed husband, you rocked your pelvis against the seam of his zipper, pushing his head further into your chest whilst his cock twitched and hardened beneath you. Hiromi practically purred, the sound muffled and vibrated right down into your soul. The possibilities were endless, and you were considering if you should slide to the floor and bathe his cock in your spit or ride him until all that wicked tension left his body when he suddenly paused.
His hands moved to your waist, the pressure firmer than expected and he gently slid you back along his knees so you were no longer planted over his poorly concealed erection. The flicker of guilt burnt in his whisky-smoked eyes, and it soured your smile. Hiromi shook his head and exhaled deeply, his eyes flitting away from yours.
“I can’t do this,” he muttered.
“You… can’t fuck your wife?” Your voice broke into a laugh that had nothing to do with amusement and everything to do with the bitter twist of uncertainty in your stomach. “Since when?”
“Don’t say that. I want to, but I need to ask you something first.” Hiromi cupped your face in his hands, leaning in to press what he hoped were reassuring kisses to your forehead, cheeks and lips. “Then you can decide if you still wanna… y’know.”
Your eyes narrowed, suspicion forming like a snake ready to strike, and your arms folded tightly across your chest. He swallowed nervously, struggling not to ogle your beautiful breasts that he would be fully buried in by now and likely suckling on had it not been for his damned conscience.
“Spit it out, Higuruma.”
Oh, he was in trouble.
Hiromi cleared his throat and fixed you with a beseeching look. “Will you be my assistant?” He rushed on when you visibly bristled. “It’s only for two weeks until the agency can find me a replacement and, and… it was Kento’s idea!”
“Throwing Kento under the bus isn’t going to save your hide, Mr Higuruma!” You slid sideways onto the couch, ignoring the groan of disappointment from beside you. “You know very well I am in the midst of my PhD. How could you think it would be feasible for me to come work in your office as an errand girl for a fortnight?”
“Well… I have a plan,” he said, both pointer fingers coming together as he continued to give you the best impression of those adorable dogs with the droopy eyes.
When he didn’t elaborate immediately, your eyebrows rose and you nudged his knee with yours.
“R-right. I know you’ve been writing your paper here at home. So, I thought that maybe I could also work from home. You could help me out and continue your work in between the things I need.”
Dammit, that wasn’t quite the terrible idea you had initially anticipated. You eyed your husband from head to toe, and he desperately tugged at your folded arms until he could take your hands into his. He kissed across your knuckles, nuzzling his cheek, rough from a faint five o’clock shadow, into the back of your hands.
“Hiromi…” you warned, but he was almost too overjoyed to hear his given name once more to heed the warning in your voice.
“Two weeks. That’s all. And I promise not to ask for too much, only the absolute necessities that I can’t manage myself. Please?”
How could you deny him when he asked so sweetly and especially when you knew just how under the cosh he was with his upcoming trial? It would only interfere with your deadlines if he didn’t uphold his promises, but you chose to believe that he would. After all, Hiromi was rather keen on keeping his balls attached to his body.
“Fine, but you owe me.”
~
The first week went by without incident. It was an adjustment, to say the least, but once you found your feet and Hiromi got used to not having to leave at the arse crack of dawn, it was rather lovely to see more of your handsome husband.
Being able to sit down at the small kitchen table to eat lunch together was a daily treat, and it filled you with triumph when he would eagerly seek you out in the kitchen with his nose sniffing out whatever delicious treat you had prepared that day. Ensuring Hiromi ate during the working day was, more often than not, a struggle, with several text messages bouncing back and forth until he acquiesced–but not now.
Maybe it was the lure of stolen kisses or the giggles shared when you called him Mr Higuruma, breathlessly pressing your body into his and squealing playfully when he pawed at your backside in turn.
You’d be lying if you weren’t enjoying the pseudo roleplay of boss and subordinate. Playing pretend with a power balance that didn’t translate to your relationship outside this current scenario. There was no top or bottom, no dominant or submissive, just two people enraptured by each other. Sometimes you led, and other times he did. Your marriage was well-balanced, and you loved that about Hiromi. He wasn’t threatened by a woman that initiated, in fact, he loved it—loved you. So this new experience, where he was large and in charge at all times, was certainly thrilling, but not everything was smooth sailing.
Hiromi was demanding, to say the least. When he was engrossed in a specific piece of work, he had a way of speaking that made you want to smack him round the head with one of his many manila folders, preferably one of the thicker ones.
No wonder his assistant had quit if he regularly spoke to her in the clipped manner you had heard on more than several occasions now. Only your intimate knowledge of the man kept your tongue in your head and your hand away from the folders. Niceties were time-consuming when he was against the clock. He didn’t mean to be cold, and you told yourself this over and over, but it still hurt, just a little.
Higuruma could get used to this.
He idly wondered how he would feasibly make the transition back to office working once this temporary fix came to an end. He didn’t miss his morning commutes, the packed trains that felt like being crammed into sardine tins, nor the chill of the office before the heating had a chance to warm the rooms sufficiently.
It was a treat to be able to roll out of bed and right into his desk chair. If he wanted to start at 6am, he could, though you would chastise him thoroughly if he dared to. He knew you liked your morning snuggles, and so did he. Waking slowly to your soft snores which he liked to call purrs, and soaking in the smell of your sleep-soaked skin whilst his hands roamed every inch of your softness he could reach. It made it easier to escape the clutches of sleep, knowing you were waiting for him.
However, the star attraction of the current situation was you. Never had he cast an appreciative eye over one of his assistants, not even before he met you, but you were his wife, and he couldn’t help but gawk at his sheer dumb luck. There was something altogether forbidden about the fantasies in his head which, of course, made them all the more alluring.
The first few days at home he had stayed in comfortable clothing, favouring the sweats he’d wear around the house on the weekends and his old college sweater, but quickly, he realised that this didn’t work for him. He needed the structure of his routine even if he wasn’t venturing past his front door, so the suits returned—starched collars and a black tie at his throat. As if to match his energy, you started to dress formally too, and what a treat that was.
Pencil skirts that he didn’t think he’d ever seen, blouses that nipped in your waist, pinafore dresses that swished around your thighs and most decadent of all–lace-topped stockings.
You were driving him to distraction, and the worst of it was that he was certain you didn’t realise. It made him sound shorter than he liked, his words coming out clipped, and his pleasantries sounded cursory rather than heartfelt. You were doing your best to accommodate his needs whilst still working on your paper, and here he was, wishing to bend you over his desk to run his nose and mouth over your squidgy thighs, the meat of your backside and the seat of your underwear until it soaked through with his saliva.
By the time the second week rolled around, Higuruma was a volcano, ready and raring to erupt at the slightest breeze or incident. The lunchtime kisses were no longer satiating his desires, nor were the evenings spent worshipping at the altar of your puffy, spit-covered pussy. It wasn’t enough to scratch this very specific itch.
“I’ve made the copies you asked for, Hiromi. I’ve also updated your calendar with the pre-agenda meeting that came through from the opposing side. Was there anything else for now?”
Hiromi audibly moaned when your wrist grazed his fingers, setting down the documents in question and lingering by his side, waiting for an answer. He tugged sharply at the knot of his tie, feeling choked for air—starved of logic.
As he glanced up at you, he paused. Your bottom lip was held fast between your teeth, eyes positively alight with playful mischief. So maybe you were more aware of the thick-as-sticky treacle tension than he gave you credit for. He fixed the cuffs of his shirt in an attempt to mask the shake of his hands, setting his pen down before leaning back in his chair. It creaked in protest, and you raised a hand to stifle a laugh.
“Actually, there is something else, and it cannot be put off a moment longer,” he drawled with a tone that suggested he was going to dictate a letter or something equally menial.
You were not expecting him to spin his chair towards you and yank you down by the arm into his lap. The shriek that left you was genuine, only silenced towards the end by the firm melding of warm, insistent lips. His hands were everywhere and all at once; squeezing the tops of your arms, ripping at the buttons that hid your cleavage from him and skimming beneath the tight hold of your skirt until it rucked around your hips.
There was such urgency to his movements that you struggled to catch up, but finally, you broke apart from his mouth, saliva strands webbing and breaking apart as your tongue passed through them and across your swollen lips. “Mr Higuruma! What would your wife say?”
It was meant as a spicy joke, a nod to the little games that had been at play and the dynamic the two of you had fallen into, but you sensed immediately that it didn’t go over well. He stopped fumbling with the buttons of your blouse, half of them free from their holes and the lace of your bra now prominently on show, breasts firmly squeezed together given the constraints of the material.
“I-I would… never. I mean…” You watched the desire in his eyes shift to panic, and you shushed him with a finger over his lips. Your heart ricocheted in your chest at the sincerity, and if you believed you couldn’t love him any more than you already did, it proved untrue when you witnessed the devotion that shone in those whisky-coloured eyes.
“I know. It’s okay,” you murmured, closing the distance and trailing your lips over his jaw and up to his ear. “I like it… keep going, please?”
Oh gods, how could he have ever deserved a woman like you in his life? Hiromi whimpered, his eyebrows pinched together, and he felt that final strand of restraint snap clean in two. His lip trembled for a second before he was on you again. Hungry kisses pathed down your throat, a hand at the back of your head to keep you close and manoeuvre you exactly as he wanted.
You scrabbled at his tie, pulling it free with a whip crack until you could toss it behind you and return your focus to his shirt so you could scratch at his chest and leave red welts across his skin.
“No.” The frantic lawyer shook his head, pressing his fingertips over the fresh mark he’d sucked into your neck simply to watch you whine from the pressure of the blooming bruise. “Belt, now.”
Jumping at the ragged command that rasped from Hiromi’s throat, you complied without teasing or complaint. Working the tail of his leather belt through the buckle and sighed at the clatter of the metal when it rattled free to join his tie somewhere unseen in the room.
“Fuck… take it out, please.”
He didn’t wait for you to say anything, nor did he wait for you to pop his top button or lower his zip. He was too focused on freeing your bountiful tits and taking them into his mouth. Your eyes raised to the heavens when his hot needy tongue licked around your nipple, the lace cups shoved down to push your breast up and into his face.
For long moments, you only watched as he laved you with his spit, lips drawn around your pert buds to elicit that deep-seated squirm of pleasure that echoed between your thighs. Hiromi lifted his gaze to your face, making sure you watched as he sandwiched your breast together with his broad palms so he could suckle both nipples at once. Your jaw slackened, your stomach sucked in, and your hips undulated atop his thighs.
It invigorated the tightness of your hold on his cock, drawing it out of his briefs followed by his heavy balls to stroke him hard and fast. He could take it, you knew that, his purpled cockhead sticky from precum that painted your fingers and palm. You paused with his foreskin pulled back, fingers ringing his base to use your other hand to tickle the seam of his balls. He jerked up with a muffled grunt, a resounding pop echoing in the study when his lips pulled free of your breasts.
“Need you, Sir. Please, want this,” you paused to squeeze his shaft in emphasis, “Inside me.”
“Little fucking temptress, you know that? Should’ve bent you over this desk days ago…” He growled against your collarbone, marking it with his teeth.
Higuruma stood abruptly. You squealed and anchored an arm around his neck, refusing to give up your possessive grab of his throbbing dick. He turned and shoved the back of his chair flush against the edge of his desk to stabilise it before dropping you into the leather seat and folding your legs back to your chest.
His rough fingers pinched into the fat of your thighs, fiddling with the sticky bands of your lace stockings and damn near ripped them. You would have complained had it not been for the raw emotions written all over Hiromi’s face, his eyes fixed on the seat of your underwear and the obvious stain that was caused by his ministrations.
Bending his knees to drop closer to you, he savoured your mouth with his tongue pushing past the seam of your lips to curl over your teeth. He filled his hands with the fat of your ass, pulling the cheeks apart and massaging the roundness with little gentleness. It was all you could do to moan, the sounds swallowed greedily only to be replaced by a pleading keen when he tugged your underwear away from your cunt. The fabric bunched around your knees, and you assumed he’d move back to remove them fully, but he didn’t. Instead, he twisted the material until it was tight around the bend of your knees, pinning you in place.
His long slender fingers stroked your pretty slit, coming away with remnants of your arousal and using it to mix with his precum that continued to weep onto your hand. Hiromi’s head sagged forward, black hair falling into his eyes as a long string of saliva fell from what he’d gathered behind his teeth to your sensitive clit. He smeared it around the bundle of nerves, scissoring his fingers until he could tug it feverishly.
“Hiro… fuck me already. Goddammit, I’m gonna blow,” you whined, painfully aware that you were dangling by a thread.
You helped him lead his cock to your entrance, tapping it against your folds to see the tendons in his neck strain and giving you some semblance of smug satisfaction. When he finally notched where you needed him most, your breathing was coming so rapidly you faintly worried you might pass out from this. The air was so thick you struggled to inhale, drowning in this faux forbidden tryst.
He groaned, long and low. His nose nudged into your warm cheek as he bent even lower and pushed into your velvet heat. “That’s it. This pretty pussy is sucking me in—fuck—oh, you like that?” He teased, his hips drawing back only to plunge in again, and deeper this time when he felt you clench around him.
You gripped his forearms, head lolling against the headrest when his cock reached your depths, and the coarse midnight patch of hairs at his pelvis rubbed delicious friction into your pert little pearl.
“Mhm… mhm. Keep going. Don’t stop.”
Higuruma could have laughed at the absurdity of your words. What made you think he could stop even if he wanted to? You were hugging him too perfectly, pulling him back in each time he withdrew his hips. The rhythmic pap of his full-to-bursting balls against the split of your ass rocketed him closer and closer to the finish point, enough so that he fisted the base of his dick to stave off his looming orgasm. He wasn’t ready for this to end, but that didn’t mean he was going to stop either.
The tails of his shirt escaped his trousers and obscured the view of his cock disappearing into your warm cunt, and he growled in frustration. You were so close to the precipice of your orgasm that you didn’t realise why he was growling, only moaning at the primal noise and clenching down hard enough that Hiromi’s eyes nearly popped out of his head.
Releasing his hold on your thighs, he grinned wolfishly at the imprints of his fingertips on the backs of your legs. With his heart pounding rapidly, he ripped his shirt up his torso and gripped the material between his teeth. His cock sawed in and out at a pace that was losing its rhythm at an alarming rate.
He’d never looked like this before, crazed with desire and burning heat covering the apples of his cheeks. The whisky smoke in his eyes was barely visible due to how blown out his pupils were, and you lifted a hand to caress his cheek. His eyes cut to you, hips rotating whilst buried against your cervix, and with a sharp nod, he asked you to cum for him. His thumb sought out your clit, working it from side to side whilst his balls drew painfully tight and the first lick of molten heat dripped at the base of his spine.
Your eyes rolled over, limbs going lax and pliant pinned between the chair and his body. Your toes curled within your stockings, thighs trembling and butterflying open onto the arms of the chair. Hiromi rode out your high, slowing himself just so, but he couldn’t hold back for too long.
With a willpower that shocked him, he pulled out at the last moment and pumped himself until thick viscous spurts of cum shot across your exposed breasts and stained the blouse covering your stomach. He convulsed so intensely his knees nearly buckled, long drawn-out whimpers ripping from his throat, and you watched it all through hooded, blissed-out eyes.
Hiromi sagged forward, his forehead pressed against yours as he fought to catch his breath. His cock twitched as it softened, the sensation worsened by your toying little fingers exploring his sensitive skin and rubbing the mixture of his and your arousal into his pelvis and across his balls. He didn’t know what to say. The fantasy lived out was so much more than his imagination could conjure, but he still felt a little vulnerable now it was over.
He unstuck his tongue from the roof of his mouth and licked over his parched lips. Words caught in his throat, but they were cut off by the trill of his phone on the desk as it vibrated across the wood. You handed it to him with a shy smile, and he answered it after smoothing back his hair.
“Mr Higuruma?”
“S-speaking,” he answered, clearing his throat urgently.
“I’m calling from Clerical Angels. Unfortunately, I have bad news. It is going to be another week before a new assistant can start. I’m sorry for the delay, I know it must be an inconvenience…”
Your eyes widened at the conversation you could hear as clear as day, meeting his steady gaze with cheeks that burned with a combination of mild embarrassment and intrigue. One more week.
“Not at all. I think I can cope, my wife is happy to bend over backwards for me.”
Oh, Hiromi would pay for that comment… but not for at least another week.
#delirious writes#higuruma hiromi#higuruma x reader#higuruma smut#higuruma hiromi x reader#higuruma hiromi smut#jjk higuruma#jjk x reader#jjk smut
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Anatomy
Gojo x reader
18 + You’re about to take one of the most important exams. Unfortunately you suck at your anatomy and need to learn the material fast. Luck for you Gojo is good at everything, not only that but he’s also a teacher. Soon you learn about his odd teaching techniques.
"I don’t think I’ll be able to pass this test." You groan as you drink your coffee Shoko had bought you.
You were out with the two of your friends so they could cheer you up. As a healer you had to go the health care route in your studies but it wasn’t so simple.
"Why don’t you just cheat? Shoko is cheating!" Gojo looks at her before returning his gaze back at you.
You let out a deep sign as you slouch in your chair.
Just because she’s cheating doesn’t mean you should too. She’s had some good memory so it was easy to learn everything for her. Unlike you who had to actually go study for it.
Shoko said she would help you cheat through the homework, quizzes, project but you where on your own for the final exam. If you wanted to graduate at the same time as her then you would have to ace this anatomy exam tomorrow.
You felt too scared to cheat. What if you were caught? You would be academically expelled!
You groan loudly before looking up at your friends who had worried expressions.
"How bad do you guys think I’m going to do?" You ask.
"Fail"
"You’ll be fine"
They both said at the same time. Shoko elbows Gojo and then proceeds to grab your hands.
"Just study hard. I would love to help but I have a mission to go on but…" she turns to look at Gojo who was biting his biscuit. "But Gojo here is a teacher now."
Ah right, that moron did take up a teaching job right after graduating. Now that you think about it Shoko might be right. He’s a teacher! His job is to teach material to students. He could help you learn everything you need to. Not only that but he was good at everything he did, he would be able to learn everything in no time.
"Gojo you have to teach me!" You say with a pleading look.
"Haha, right as if you would want to learn anything from me. Don’t you two always make fun of me? Saying I’ll be a horrible teacher and whatnot."
Both of you glare at him.
"Ah, your serious I see.,." He says confused yet surprised.
—-
He was taking his sweet time looking over your text book. Giggling over a few certain pages before slamming the book shut.
You lift your head up from the couches arm.
"Alright I got everything down. Do you want to start with the bones or muscles?"
Gojo decided that the best place to study was in the comfort of his own home. You had protested by saying a library or coffee shop would be better because it would motivate you more.
He then proceeded to call you delusional and dragged you to his place.
It’s not like you haven’t been here before. You all used to hang out here almost everyday during high school. Now he was too busy working while you and Shoko were busy at school trying to get a masters degree.
"Bones"
You figured out really soon that his teaching techniques were quite odd.
Wack
"Ow! What was that for?!" You say as you rub your thigh.
Did he really just hit you with his arm?
"Where did I hit you?" He asks.
"My thigh you idio-"
"Wrong, tell me the name of the bone."
Ah, of course. You sigh as you tell him that he hit your femur with his ulna.
Wack, wack
That’s how studying went for a while. Eventually he would speed up the process by going faster and by hitting multiple spots at once. At the end you felt so sore.
You laid sprawled out on the floor as an ice bag rested on your rib cage.
At this point five long hours had gone by. Thankfully you had learned all the skeletal bones in the body but it was taking longer than you initially expected it to. If you guys keep on like this then it would take you forever to learn the muscles.
"You look so defeated already." Gojo said amused as you laid still.
"This is just harder than I thought it was going to be. Don’t you have a different way of learning anatomy without hurting me?" You ask.
You saw his mouth turn into a wide grin before he squatted down.
"I do have a different way but I feel like you’d dislike it." He smiles.
"I Dont care, I just need to learn the muscles in two hours!" You say looking at the clock.
"Let’s put consequences, people are prone to make less mistakes and to try harder if there’s a punishment."
You roll your eyes.
The exam was early in the morning and you needed all the rest you could get. He was just wasting time at this point. You sigh and just go along with his nonsense.
He grabs your hand and pulls you up so you could sit. He then sat across from you and took his mask off from his face.
He must finally be taking this seriously. Grabbing your hand once again he pulls your index finger and puts it on his cheek.
This was the exact same method, just with no pain involved.
"Masseter"
Then he dragged your finger to his temple.
"Temporalis"
You watch as he squints his eyes at you and looks at you suspiciously.
"I thought you needed help. Seems like you have it down."
"I obviously know a few things. For example the obvious ones like biceps. I know everything above the neck too."
He sits there in his thoughts for a moment before grabbing your hand again.
He slowly unfolded your hand and brought it to his chest. It surprised you for a second but you quickly remembered why he was doing this.
"Breast."
The both of you look at each other for a solid second. Holding eye contact before he suddenly burst out laughing. He had to catch his breath before correcting you.
"Pectoralis major"
Right… you would have totally gotten that right if it wearing for him doing such a thing.
You repeat the answer under your breath as he moves your hand once again.
This time it’s was his abs.
You swallow hands as he runs your hands over them. He wore a tight black shirt making it feel like it was his real skin. You could tell he was watching you carefully. Trying to read the facial expressions you were making. He was enjoying this…
You could concentrate at all. You had the answer on the tip of your tongue but it would spill out.
He kept running your hand up and down
"You’re taking too long y/n, the answer is recuts abdominus. We can come back to it later. Shall I give you a hard one?" He asks.
Maybe this was enough for today. Clearly he was toying with you and you had no time for such thing. Once you get home you’re going to study till midnight.
He moved your hand before you could tell him the study session was over.
It took you a moment to realize what you where not touching and it was indeed hard.
You jolt as he squeezed your hand around his length.
Don’t think about it.
Don’t think about it.
Don’t think about it.
Just answer the stupid question and be over with his games.
"Your small penis"
He glare’s at you as he runs your hand up and down his shaft.
"You know well this isn’t small."
You turn to look away from him so he wouldn’t see your cheeks turning pink. You could feel how it twitched under your touch, how it was pulsing begging to be let out. Begging for any sort of attention. Something you weren’t willing to give so easily.
"Anyways you’re wrong. A penis isn’t a muscle."
Huh?
"It’s not?! But you can move it right?"
Gojo for some reason took this as in invitation to unbutton his pants and to spring it out. You didn’t know whether to look away or take this as a learning observation.
Learning! You’re doing this to learn about the human anatomy! You hum in your head.
Averting your eyes down you see it. That wide long monstrous thing. How could that possibly fit inside of anyone?! Who would even want to sleep with him?
He moved it somehow. You watched it move up and down slowly.
"That’s two answers wrong in a row y/n" he coos.
Right. The punishment.
"So what are you going to make me do? Run laps? push-ups? Your chores?"
"No it’s something even better. Not only will this benefit me but it’s also going to make you learn a bit faster hopefully." He says.
Grabbing your leg he drags you towards him. You yelp at the sudden surprise. You knew he was a hundred times stronger than you so you didn’t bother to fight back. You watched him carefully as he climbed over you. His hair dangling over you.
He leans in slowly into your ear and whispered six words.
"I’m going to put it in."
Your breath hitches as you pushed him back.
This man was trying to kill you! There’s no way, absolutely no way that was going to fit in you at all! Of course you’ve had your fare share of men in you but nothing this big.
You shake your head repeatedly at him.
"You scared? Don’t worry I’ll be nice and careful. I’ll even let you stop me from moving if you answer my questions right." Gojo moves your hair to the back of your ear.
He ran his thumb over your temple in circles trying to sooth you.
All you had to do was get the answer correct right? You’ll just get them all right so he won’t even be able to enter you.
You feel as his hands run over your waist. His cold hands touching your sensitive skin before he gripped your bottoms and yanked them down. Your hands quickly go down to hide everything but he was quick to grab both of your wrist with one hand.
"You’re tempting me to just ram into you if you keep squirming like that."
You stay still causing him to laugh.
"Since you got two wrong I get to put two inches in." He says as he lines himself up with your hole.
You kick him and yell at him to stretch you out first but he refuses by saying that it wouldn’t be a punishment if he were to do that. With that out the way he began sliding into you. The second his tip went in you let out a cry of pain.
You try to run away by scooting back but he held you down and kept going in.
His eyes would squeeze shut at he bit his bottom lip. You could feel as he gripped your wrist and the leg he was holding up.
You let out a louder cry as he kept going. Begging him to stop and to let you adjust. There’s no way women actually enjoyed sleeping with him. He was carrying and actual weapon. He could literally kill someone with that.
Once he did stop you let out a loud groan.
"Such a good girl, you’re doing so good. Who would have know you were so tight." He kisses the inside of your leg.
You whimper in protest.
"What’s this?"
He points at the side of his rib cage.
"Y-your external oblique." Your voice trembles.
"Atta girl."
He then points at the middle part of his thigh.
You began to panic. Name, what’s the name?!why couldn’t they have simple names?! Why are there so many different muscles?
You open your mouth hoping the right answer would hopefully come out. The femur was located there so it had to have the word in the name right? Or at least rhyme with it. Femur-loris? Femoris? That sounded right but what if there’s a second part. Or maybe it was just one word.
You looked at him hoping for a hint but he just stared at you. Finding it amusing the way you were trying to think so hard while he was inside of you.
"You’re taking too long." He says as he shoves himself deeper inside of you.
Ngh!
You whimper as gets I n deeper.
"Femoris!" You yell out.
He makes you take in another inch.
"Fuck! You piece of shit! You’re a horrible teacher! I’m not going to learn anything like this!" You curse at him.
He slams the rest of his three inches inside of you causing you to cry. Your eyes almost roll back as you felt him stuff you. He slams your arms above your head and presses his pelvis deeper into yours. Rolling his hips over and over again making you go crazy. Your eyes began to water as you felt overwhelmed. Hot tears coating your eyelash.
Mascar stains your under eyes and your face begins to heat up. You’re begging him to slow down. Looking at him with a pleading look.
"Gojo, please! I don’t know the answer. I can’t even think straight right now!" You sob.
“Recuts Femoris." He says through his teeth.
He leads your hand to his chest and makes you tell him the answer to that one again.
You give him the correct name of it and felt as he began to slow down inside of you. He lets go of your wrists and brings his thumb to your clit. Rubbing it in circles to give you pleasure.
"A reward for being such a smart girl." He whispers.
He watches as you squirm and jolt at the sensation. He kept sliding in and out of you slowly but the pleasure was more overwhelming than the pain.
You start moaning out his name the faster he went. You’ve never felt this good before. With all the men you slept this had to the best one yet. He wasn’t even fucking you probably! He was toying with you!
What would it feel like if he was actually trying?
"Can’t you just fuck me properly?!" You say
He looks at you shocked before smiling. He put your legs over each shoulder and leaned in closer to you. You moan as he somehow reached a deeper area inside of you.
"I will when you get everything down and if you pass I’ll even eat you out." He groans as he grinds himself onto you.
You don’t know how or where all of this knowledge came from all of a sudden. Each place he pointed out you got the right answer, well almost. You would slip a few times making him pull away and slam into you. At some point your body finally adjusted to his length. This making the punishment more wanted. Sometimes you got the answers wrong on purpose.
By the end you had everything down and he was finally fucking you the way you wanted.
He had you on your knees as he plowed into you.
"I think this technique of learning is way better. Now shall we keep doing this for every exam?" He grins.
#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#gojo saturo#gojo sensei#gojo x you#gojo x y/n#jujutsu gojo#gojo smut#gojo x reader#gojou satoru x reader#gojo satoru
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Yandere Manager When You Call in Sick
“Wait what!?”
Your eyes are so heavy you can barely see
Your body too is like concrete
And the Hot and Cold chills changing from an inescapable savanna to the North side of the Arctic
It’s honestly a miracle you were able to call at all
For all his nagging and disturbing actions for the time being he is your official boss
It would be unprofessional not to say something
You also must be in such a haze because you only called him and not the assistant manager
After you make the call, you return to the pillow and you slip back into a feverish sleep
Of course unbeknownst to you the Manager is losing it
The other employees have probably gotten the gist after he launched a chair into the breakroom wall and began angrily mumbling to himself
“B-b-boss, why don’t you go visit them? Like, offer to take care of them!”
“Y-y-yeah j-j-j-ust give us the keys for lock up and you can go pick up some soup for them or something. Y-you still have their key right?”
Like an instant change of night and day, the Manager is all smiles as he easily wrenches the chair from the new hole in the wall
“Thanks, guys! I promise not to secretly apply those pay cuts I wanted to. I’ll also be sure to give you a pizza party. And for good measure, I won’t slash your tires. ”
“What?!” “Wait–”
“Toodaloo!”
With a skip in his step, Clyde is on his way to your house after visiting the local pharmacy and employing his manager's discount
Ie: blackmail
“Honey, I’m home! Have you eaten today? Drink any water?”
If it weren’t for the attempts at getting this man off your property
But of course, he’ll stroll in with his copied key of yours
And for once you’ll probably appreciate it
Massages or icepack or heating pad whatever you want he pampers you beyond compare
Taking advantage of your feverish disposition to lick kiss the sweat on your body
“You’re so sweet, Honey! Even when your sick!”
After a swab on the inside of your cheek don’t ask why he wanted that+
And a little cuddle
Then he starts doing your chores
Clothes, food prep, organizing, cleaning
He gets to work
Taking the dirty undergarments or sucking on your toothbrush as compensation
It’s a nervous habit
Where he keeps himself busy because staring at your labored breathing scares him
He’ll pop into check on you but for his health he can’t be by your side 24/7
At the end of the day, if your temperature hasn’t gone down, he might call his special doctor
Now don’t try asking for their credentials–they’ll just ignore you
But they’ll make sure you’ll pull through from this
“How are you feeling, my love? Better?”
“W-what are you doing in my house?”
“Now do you want takeout or homemade chili? Also, I don’t approve of your shift changes so you’ll have to come in your usual times.”
When you are well enough to physically push him out he’ll start concluding his visit
“GET OUT! And don’t come back!”
“So mean! You’re lucky I don’t dock your pay right now!”
For all his whining he is quite pleased
The haul was magnificent this time around
Part of its charm is the fact that you were in the house when he stole it
“Ah what a good day….it’s almost so good maybe I won’t slash my employees' tires anyway…,,,who am I kidding? That’s the best part of the weekend!”
More of Yandere Manager
#yandere x reader#yandere x you#lovelyyandereaddictionpoint#yanderexrea#yandere#yanderes#yandere manager#yandere manager oc#yandere manager oc x reader#yandere oc x you#yandere oc#yandere x darling#yandere headcanons#yandere original character#yandere oc x reader#yandere oc x y/n
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Hi! I’m not sure if you’re still taking requests for criminal minds but if you are could you do the BAU react to their so being a paramedic/firefighter? :))
If you decide to write this thank you in advance
(BAU Headcanons) If their S.O. was a paramedic/firefighter 🚨
A/N: You're very welcome! Here you are my angel. I'm always taking requests but I can't promise how long I'll take to reply and finish them 😅 Hope this is worth the wait. Also - major shout out to any first responders out there. You are literal superheroes! 💕
Warnings: Mentions of injuries, mentions of mental health, alcohol references, sexual references, references to death. (Let me know if I missed any)
Aaron Hotchner
Aaron would be honestly so in awe of you and what you do for a living. He’d also appreciate having a partner who understands what it’s like to have a job with unpredictable hours, such high stakes, and requires risking yourself to save people.
As such, he would know how important it is to prioritise time together for the two of you. It’s why he is so active with forming a family calendar as he knows that, if it isn’t written in ink, you may never find an opportunity to do something.
He is all about creating concrete plans for you both, so you have something to look forward to and actually have a chance of being able to arrange it, even if it’s months in advance. It doesn’t matter if it’s Jack’s soccer game, going for a jog in the park together, or a week-long vacation.
However, he’s learned to be far more flexible if plans don’t work out the way you’d hoped. He’s had virtual Thanksgivings with you over the phone, a boxing-day Christmas, and even turned running errands on a day off into a date-day.
We know Aaron would honestly hate knowing how much danger you’re in sometimes at work but he also knows he has no leg to stand on given his job and what he does every day. So, you both agree to let the other one know at least once a day that you’re ok, even if only by text.
You’d have to agree to a ‘no work at home’ policy for you both to even stand a chance of relaxing at home and focusing on Jack (who thinks he has the coolest parents ever! Like, two superheroes for parents? He’s the luckiest kid in the world).
Aaron would be such a proud partner too, even if he doesn’t always say it out loud. He shows it in his face every time he and Jack come to visit you at work, or when he displays a picture of you receiving an award on his desk for everyone to see.
He even helps Jack when he asks to go as you for Halloween one year - the sight of which made you cry so hard you couldn’t even speak for a good hour after. Instead, you snap a picture and carry it with you everywhere when you leave the house, and even stick a copy in your locker.
He’d have notifications set too, tracking incidents in your area so he knows when you may be working or out on a job. He’s also not above pulling the ‘FBI’ card if he even hears of someone making your life hard at work.
He’d also be the biggest hypocrite, always worried you’re not getting enough sleep or eating enough, despite him running on no sleep and three expressos.
He’d also be the first to rip into you if he found out you’d taken some unnecessary risk whilst out on a call.
“I have enough worrying about my own idiots over here without worrying about you doing something stupid too. Please, you need to be more careful, ok? I can’t and won’t lose you. Not like that.”
David Rossi
Rossi has lost many people over the years so he would definitely be terrified of losing you, and getting hurt. However, he knows what it’s like to have a passion for helping people and he’d never stop you from doing what you love and making a difference.
Besides with his crazy schedule he doesn’t mind having a partner who is mostly out working, or also operates on a crazy schedule. It’s almost complimentary, and allows you both not to miss each other too badly when you’re busy.
Rossi strikes me as a supportive partner in his own ways. For instance, he would make massive donations to fundraisers for your department and for causes supported by your work. He wouldn’t even tell you most of the time, leaving you to work out where the mystery million dollars came from overnight after you just so happened to mention it to him over dinner.
Speaking of dinner, he’d be keen to invite your colleagues over to his place for social functions, offering to hosts BBQs and family dinners. He’d also invite his BAU family too, knowing how nice it is for your worlds to mix and for people to relax amongst people who get what it’s like to deal with difficult issues.
He also makes homemade dinners at least once a week, cooking enough so that you both have leftovers to take to work for the next few days.
He’s also keen to share any recipes he can with you, so you know how to make them when you’re on shift for hours on end.
“Just because you’re busy saving lives doesn’t mean someone shouldn’t take care of you too!”
This man would also make sure to call you whenever he gets a chance, especially if he is away on a case. He likes hearing your voice and makes sure to ask all about your day so far, knowing its good for both of you to touch base.
Derek Morgan
This man would be the biggest supporter and cheerleader. Like, you know your pictures are all over his desk and he’s always bragging about how you saved someone’s life whenever he gets a chance.
“Oh yeah, that’s my baby. They’re a literal superhero. They’re badass.”
That doesn’t mean he doesn’t worry about you when you’re away working or if he sees some major incident on the news. He’ll be refreshing his phone over and over until he sees a text from you telling him you’re ok.
You know he will also be begging Penelope to see what she can find out too, through any means necessary (Hotch doesn’t exactly have to know about it…)
You bet your ass that if he does hear you’re hurt or if something is wrong then he will be bolting his way down to the ER or wherever you are the minute he is able to. Penelope would likely be one step ahead of him if he was unable to be there right away taking care of you until he can.
Morgan is such a good care giver too. He knows how hard it is to take care of others if you don’t take care of yourself so is King of supporting healthy habits. I’m talking meal plans so you eat right, proper sleeping habits when you can make them work, and getting out of your apartment on your days off.
He’s all for vegging on the sofa sometimes but he’s keen to support you where he can and remind you there’s a world outside of work and your home.
He would be the kind of partner who would suggest doing things together as a couple, whether it’s a daily jog in the park or even training for some kind of race. This gives the two of you a shared goal and also shared time together - including in the shower once you get home.
“What? It’s twice as fast this way and costs half the water bill, sweetheart.”
Also, you know this man gives the world’s best massages and he would be only too willing to give you one when you get home. He’d even try and wait up for you if he could, although you’ve come home more than once to find him passed out on the sofa.
Emily Prentiss
With her track record of trusting and being betrayed by people I think Emily would be extremely anxious about having a first responder for a partner, even if she would also be totally amazed by you and thinks you’re so badass.
Like, you can’t tell me she wouldn’t be beaming ear to ear if you ever came to visit the BAU. She would be showing you off to everyone and anyone, giving them all a face to put to the name she’s been talking about for weeks.
“Babe, you’re amazing. You’re literally saving lives every day. All I did yesterday was fill out a stack of paperwork as big as my arm.” (She ignores the disapproving look Hotch shoots her for that comment…)
It’s just that she’s scared about losing you and it would take you both a while to work out how to make your relationship work and communicate effectively with one another about your fears. I mean, it’s not like you aren’t as equally worried about her but it takes a while for you both to accept that it’s a part of your relationship and that neither of you are willing to give your jobs or each other up.
When she’s away on a case, or if you’re working overnight, then she won’t be able to sleep unless she sees she has a text from you telling her you’re ok and still in one piece. Of course, she prefers to be able to call if she can but knows it isn’t always possible for both of you if you’re in the middle of a shift.
She’s a safe space so wouldn’t take it personally when you get home and have fatigue, adrenaline dumps, or just lack any potential excitement or energy for plans you made in advance.
She’ll meet you where you are, whether it’s cancelling plans and staying in, or going out anyway because you need a distraction. As long as she’s with you then she’s happy and it isn’t like she doesn’t do the same thing after a really bad case.
Also, we know that you’re the only one she trusts to look after Sergio when she isn’t there, knowing you will be better having someone to cuddle, feed, and look after when you’re not on shift. You become Penelope’s version of Sergio too, as Emily instructs their tech analyst to keep an eye on you both when she can’t.
She’d be keen to spoil you from time to time and indulges on takeout, trips to the movies, and wants to take you to as many amazing places on holiday as she possibly can. She knows it’s good to travel and to have a complete break from your daily routine. Plus, she knows so many people and so many languages that you’re spoilt on choices of where to stay next.
JJ
I honestly feel like JJ would struggle having a first responder for a partner. She’d be such a Momma Bear that its both wonderful and intimidating. Like, we know she and Will worked it out eventually with him being a cop, but the fear of losing you would be a big issue for the two of you for a while. As would be navigating how you both deal with the other’s feelings after a bad day on the job. It takes some trial and error before you get into the swing of things.
For example, she would give the best pep talks and would also know just what to say after a bad day.
“You did everything you could, sweetheart. I am so proud of you and you saved so many lives today. You may not have been able to save that one, but they knew you tried. They knew you were there and that you cared. That’s all we can ask for in the end. You are amazing and I’ve got you.”
When you’re both home together, or if you’ve told her you’re having a rough shift, then bath times are a must. She normally has one run, with candles lit, by the time you get in the door. She is also keen to crack open a bottle of wine, or whatever you drink you want, to help you both relax as you lie together in the warm, soapy water and just forget everything for a little while.
She’d also insist on you both leaving voice messages for the other when you were away, so you could wish the other a ‘goodnight’. It’s comforting to her but she also likes being able to share them with Henry too.
Speaking of phones, this ex-media liaison would have so many alerts set up and contacts to call if she even suspects you may be out on a major incident. It’s honestly kind of mind-blowing how quickly she managed to get on the phone with your superior, after hearing you could be out on a job that had gone awry. She was in a different state at the time but wouldn’t hang up until they told her what had happened, where you were, and if you were alright.
She’s also keen to support you in a practical sense, so offers to do loads of laundry for you between shifts and also cleans the house as a way of making sure you have a nice home to come back to. You’d be sure to return the favour when you could, but she likes doing it and being able to show her appreciation for you in such a basic but important way.
JJ would be way more relaxed leaving Henry with you if she’s away, knowing your training makes you like the best possible babysitter ever.
That, and you cannot tell me that Henry would not worship the ground you walk on. After finding out what you do for work, that little angel would make siren noises whenever you’re in the car together - something you’re keen to encourage as “everyone knows the best part of the job is turning the siren on, JJ. Duh.”
Luke Alvez
Luke would be so proud and so scared for you sometimes, being a first responder.
Luke would understand that you both have super stressful jobs so is keen to suggest a ’leave work at the door’ policy unless one of you really wants to share. He knows sometimes all he wants to do after a challenging case is walk in the door and face-plant on the sofa and he’d be a hypocrite if he didn’t let you do the same… that doesn’t mean he won’t reach over and gently pull of your boots for you, and leave a glass of something on the coffee table for when you feel like it.
He is also a firm believer that Roxie cures everything, so would be only too happy to leave her with you when he’s out of town, so you can have all the cuddles and playtime you want.
He also walks her by your work if he gets time so you can come out and sneak a cuddle if you’re not too busy or on a job. Roxie is now your work’s unofficial therapy dog and she loves her role - and the added attention very much. (And you best know she has her own little version of your uniform too).
I feel like he’s the kind of guy who would wake up with you if you have an early start, even if he doesn’t, just so he can cook breakfast and make you coffee in your favourite to-go mug.
“You deserve to start your day in the right way, so go and enjoy your shower, baby, and it’ll be ready for you when you come out.”
He’d also leave you stupid little love notes in your bag too, knowing they make you smile when you find them later on. You also like to keep them and stick them in your locker for luck, and normally have one tucked in your pocket too.
He’d also recommend different kinds of music for you to listen to on shift, making you playlists you can share and add to when you’re not together. It’s got so bad your co-workers refuse to let you have the aux when you’re driving around anymore as your choices are so varied they get whiplash.
Luke also loves getting involved wherever he can, whether it’s donating time to help organise a fundraiser, bringing pizza by work, or going with you as a date to any formal events you’re invited to. He scrubs up niceeee and he loves seeing you all dressed up formal too.
Penelope Garcia
Penelope would worship the ground you walk on and frets about you like she frets about all her BAU babies when they’re out on a case - but WORSE.
So she does what she does best and compensates with love and kindness. She takes care of the people she loves and you would know that better than anyone. This queen would totally make you care packages and would make sure you had them delivered when you’re on shift.
“You spend all your time taking care of other people, my real life knight in shining armour. The least I can do is make sure you have some fluffy socks, face masks, and other basic pamper essentials to take care of yourself! Oh, and don’t forget the protein shake I made for you! And stay hydrated! And be safe!”
She’d make sure to send gifts for your co-workers too. It’s why she’s the favourite spouse of all your colleagues and she’s greeted like the queen she is whenever she visits.
Her cookies have earned her the unofficial title of ‘Star Baker’ and you best know there have been physical fights over them whenever you’ve left them in the crew mess. In fact, your boss has had to give you all warnings about it as a result, calling ‘dibs’ on them if you couldn’t all be trusted to share.
She would also give you one of her many mascots for the dashboard of your rig, knowing that the little bobblehead or whatever will remind you of her when you’re out on a call.
Speaking of calls, you know she is tuned in to all scanners / messaging systems so knows exactly where you are at all times, but especially if there is a call out. You best believe she is making sure you’re ok and has her eyes and ears open if you need help of any kind or back-up.
As a result, you know she has been scolded more than once by Hotch and by the local authorities for interfering and hijacking calls when she thinks you’re being ignored or need assistance.
Penelope would also be the first person to encourage you to attend some kind of support group, or seek out some kind of therapy, to help deal with all the stressful and traumatic things you deal with on a day to day basis. She would be only too happy to help you find one and would drive you there and back when she’s able. She’d even come along if you wanted her to.
Dr Spencer Reid
Spencer would be an incredibly proud partner and you know it. He would show his support in various different ways and would absolutely take any and all opportunities to remind people he’s dating a superhero (especially Morgan). He doesn’t understand why someone as amazing as you would choose to date someone like him.
He would like giving you book recommendations so you always have something to read on shift. He’d give you his copies to borrow, so you can enjoy his pencil notes in the margins when he’s not with you.
Not only that, but he’d also be happy to take recommendations from you too - no matter how different they may be from his usual reading material. That way you can both compare notes when you both get home and leave work behind for a moment.
Also, you know Spence would be a fountain of knowledge about your job and has probably read up on anything he didn’t already know about your field. There isn’t a piece of jargon or code that he doesn’t know and he loves trying to use it when talking to your colleagues when he visits sometimes. It earns him their respect, which you know he would be nervous about, as your co-workers are like your second family. He’s that way with the BAU and he wants to impress the people who mean the most to you.
His thirst for knowledge means he is always willing to let you practise different exercises on him and is keen to learn whatever you’re willing to tell him (something that has come in handy on many of his own cases).
In return, he would like sharing whatever statistics he has memorised about the work you do. It’s also why he is so concerned about you, knowing how much your role takes out of you. His job is tiring and traumatic enough, but he is at least part of a big team and works only one case at a time.
“I’m just saying sweetheart, it’s estimated that 30% of first responders develop behavioral health conditions including, but not limited to, depression and PTSD, as compared with 20% in the general population. If you ever want to talk to me or someone else, like a professional, then you know that’s ok.”
As much as he isn’t an overly affectionate person, I feel like he’d be the kind of person to buy you both those bracelets that you can tap and it sends a pulse to the other, letting them know you thought about them. It’s like a virtual tap on the shoulder just to let you both know they’ve got you and love you.
He’d also drive the doctors insane if you ever got hurt on the job, yelling at them to double check their diagnosis if he even thinks you’re not getting the best treatment and care possible.
He’d also insist on taking care of you during your recovery, not trusting anyone else to do it right - and he also has Dr Who primed for your entertainment. What could be better than that?
Masterlist
#ithebookhoarder#masterlist#thesilentmage#criminal minds x reader#aaron hotchner x you#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotchner x reader#david rossi x reader#david rossi x you#david rossi#derek morgan x you#derek morgan x reader#derek morgan#emily prentiss x reader#emily prentiss#emily prentiss x you#jennifer jareau x reader#jennifer jareau#penelope garcia x reader#penelope garcia#penelope garcia x you#luke alvez#luke alvez x reader#luke alvez x you#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid#spencer reid x you#criminal minds
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Breakfast for sweethearts
Summary: You only want to have a good time.
Pairing: Jax Teller x Short!Reader
Warnings: angst, bitchy people, fluff, protective Jax
Follow-up to this blurb: Blurb
Looking around the busy diner, you sigh. Your date is ten minutes late, and you are getting antsy. While you sip your tea, hoping he won’t stand you up, someone watches you angrily.
“Miss, could you hurry up and drink out your tea?” A girl asks. She’s dressed to impress, with too much make-up and a dress short enough to leave nothing to anyone’s imagination if she bends over.
You don’t mind. Sometimes you envy girls like her. They are brave enough to wear something you’d never dare to even dream of.
“Why?” You ask, wondering why she wants you to finish your tea. She’s not working at the diner, and you’re not slurping.
“My boyfriend and I want your table. We’ve been waiting for a free table for half an hour,” she snaps at you. “You can’t block a whole table to slurp tea.”
“Excuse me?” You can’t believe she’s yelling at you for drinking tea at a diner. “I’m waiting for someone. You can’t have the table.”
“Listen, Missy,” her boyfriend steps next to her to glare at you. He snatches the cup out of your hands and empties it on the floor. “Now you are done. Make space.”
You feel like someone pulled the rug out from under your feet. It’s the first time you’re completely and utterly speechless.
“Get up and leave,” the girl snarls. She snaps her fingers in your face. You are about to get up and just leave when someone behind them clears his throat.
“Do we have a problem here?” Jax watches you shrink into yourself. You look like you’re about to cry as the girl and her boyfriend turn around.
“Listen, buddy, stay out of—” the boy chokes on his words, facing a furious Jax. Everyone in town knows the Sons of Anarchy, and everyone stays out of their way. “Uh, she wanted to leave. So if you want the table.” He splutters.
“I don't think she wanted to leave.” Jax narrows his eyes at the boy. “She’s waiting for me.” The girl whimpers when Jax sizes her up. “I think you harassed my girl.” He says, nodding to himself. “What do you think I should do with someone harassing her?”
“Nothing, sir,” they stammer. “We didn’t…we wouldn’t.”
Jax puffs on his cigarette. He looks at the boy, and then the girl.
“Jax,” you murmur his name. It’s all too much. You don't want him to make a scene.
“I’ll be right there for you, Y/N,” he blows smoke in their faces, smirking darkly when they cough. “I give you ten seconds, and then you are out of my sight. But first, you’ll apologize to my girl.”
“Sorry, we are sorry.” They stammer before running off faster than you can blink.
"Now, I'm all yours."
“You’re late,” you say, watching Jax sit next to you.
“You’re cute,” he says and dips his head to look you in the eyes. “I assume the tea must be bad if they pour it on the floor. How about I invite you for breakfast at my place? I cleaned only for you, promised.”
“You smoked again too,” you tut. “I told you it’s bad for your health.”
“I drove too fast to get here,” he chuckles, watching your face contort in anger. “What are you going to do about it?”
“Sir, I’ll keep a close eye on you from now on,” you mutter under your breath. “I can’t let you drive too fast or smoke all the time. Last week, you were coughing at the grocery store.”
“You watched me?” Jax grins. “That’s very nice of you.”
“I’m nice,” you nod. “Now, let’s go to your home. Maybe I can help you with breakfast. I bet you only have unhealthy food at home.”
Jax slides out of the booth, holding out his hand. “How about you tell me about all the bad things I do?” He looks down at you, smirking again. “I love it when you care for me.”
Tags in reblog.
#Breakfast for sweethearts#jax teller#jax teller x short!reader#short reader#jax teller x you#jax teller x y/n#jax teller x female reader#sons of anarchy
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Hii :D may I request Genshin Sumeru men with an s/o who always has cold limbs? my best friend prohibited me to hug them because of my cold hands *sigh* so I need something to warm up :( anyways, have a great day!!
always cold w/ sumeru boys m.list | rules
note. hiiii thank you for your request! I hope you're doing okay with your cold hands and that it's nothing too worrying <3 hope you'll enjoy this!
Al Haitham
act like he doesn’t really care
does care in fact
annoyed but deal with it
He was sitting at his desk, working on some paper as he was the Acting Grand Sage now. He was so busy that he didn’t spend time with you for the last few days. But you knew how to get his attention, and you were sure that it would work.
You arrived from behind him without making too much noise, and you let your cold hands rest on his neck. It surprised him, he couldn’t say otherwise, as he slightly jumped on his chair at the touch. He quickly looked behind him, frowning a bit as he met your gaze and your proud smile.
“I’m busy,” he said, “and I’m cold,” you answered him without any hesitation. He knew what you were trying to do, and it simply made him sighed discreetly. He had work to do and he wasn't going to stop right now ; but he wouldn’t brush you away either. So he let you warm up your hands against his skin, as he kept working.
Kaveh
the definition of softness
he would always try to warm up your hands with his
he’s always worried that you might be cold so he’s really attentive on this
You were sitting on the couch, rubbing your hands together as you were trying to warm them up. They were so cold, as always, and it almost started to hurt you. When Kaveh came home after some time, he saw you there, slightly shaking.
He came quickly closer to you, a bit worried because he knew you were frequently cold. He sat right next to you, grabbing your hands between his. He slowly brought them closer to his lips so he could softly blow his warm breath against your skin.
“Are you okay? Is it working?” he asked you, raising his eyes to meet your gaze. You couldn’t help but to smile slightly at how adorable he was with you. Always so caring about your cold hands: it warmed your heart.
Cyno
he doesn’t really care about your cold limbs
except when you’re trying to warm them up with him
Cyno was laying in your shared bed, sleeping peacefully ; or at least trying to sleep. You were right next to him, bundled up in the blanket. You were so cold right now, almost shivering, and you couldn’t understand how your boyfriend was sleeping without any problem.
You looked at him, when an idea crossed your mind. A smirk appeared on your lips before you brought your feet closer to him. You put them right against his back, making him jump slightly in surprise.
“What the-” he turned his head, trying to look at you as you started to giggled softly. It was even funnier than you expected, and your feet were feeling warmer. Cyno was a real radiator. He sighed a bit, before turning completely around to face you. He opened his arms and you almost rushed against him, hiding your face in his neck. You were feeling way better now.
Tighnari
always taking care of your health
so your cold limbs are always a concern for him
“You should wear warmer clothes,” he said, frowning as he saw you going out in such light clothes. You looked at him in disbelief, you didn’t expect such a reaction from him. Your boyfriend was always concerned by your health, worrying too much about your whole problem with the cold.
“I’m fine Nari, it’s just my hands,” you told him as you showed him your hands, a little smile on your lips. He came closer to you, grabbing your hands between his to examine them. He looked back into your gaze, before shaking his head slowly.
“Here, wear this,” he holded gloves out to you, waiting for you to take and wear them. You rolled your eyes but didn’t fight back. With Tighnari, it was completely useless. He would never let you go out without being sure that you would be warm.
It was his way of taking care of you as he could. Health was his domain, so protect your health was the least he could do.
I love sumeru boys sm they're my favorite pls hoyoverse bring them back
#genshin impact#genshin impact x reader#genshin x reader#genshin headcanons#genshin hcs#alhaitham#al haitam x reader#alhaitham hcs#alhaitham headcanons#kaveh#kaveh x reader#kaveh headcanons#kaveh hcs#cyno#cyno x reader#cyno headcanons#cyno hcs#tighnari#tighnari x reader#tighnari headcanons#tighnari hcs#sumeru boys
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“Sick.”
Zayne x Reader.
Love and deep space fanfiction.
No use of Y/n. Read in the second person. Gender neutral reader. Brief Mention of vomit.
It had been a long couple of days for you. You’d been working non stop, as part of the alpha squad in the hunters association you dealt with a majority of the much harsher Wanderers. Due to working so much, you had caught a bit of a cold, and were sent home, given as much time as you needed to completely recover. Zayne was told almost immediately, of course. As your doctor and one of the people closest to you, he was bound to know eventually. And so here you were, curled up on the couch with a blanket in your house clothes. And there he was, standing in the kitchen and making you tea. You shifted, back against the arm of your couch, and watched him. His back was facing you, but you could already imagined his focused face, brows furrowed and lips slightly taut.
“Your eyes are burning holes through my skull.” He suddenly said, turning his head to meet your apparently intense gaze. You’d zoned out, blinking rapidly at him, and you caught the curl of his lips and the amusement glitter in his eyes. “What are you thinking about?” He asked, picking up the mug that you’d bought as a souvenir at one of the aquariums, it had little seals plastered over it. Somehow, it had become the go-to mug for you, and Zayne always got that one first when he made you something to drink. The dark haired doctor approached you, placing your mug in your outstretched hands.
You shrugged, “Nothing, really.” You looked at the mug in your hands and blew softly at the hot tea. “Don’t you have work today?” You asked him, shifting and sitting criss-cross as you sipped the tea, still burning your tongue despite your caution. Zayne chuckled softly at the cringe your face twisted into, and shook his head in amusement as he often did at your actions. “Not today. I shouldn’t be too busy when I do, but I trust when I’m not here you will take care of yourself.” He always snuck in a lecture about your health. Though it was well placed now, as you sat there, sniffling and breathing in the steam rising from your tea to clear your sinuses.
“Awh. Taking a day off just for me?” You teased. Though you were sick that would not stop you from picking at him, and he knew that too well. His lips curled into a slight half smile and he leaned back into the couch “I find myself doing that often. Something’s always wrong with you.” He said light heartedly. It took a long time for you to start to recognize his sarcasm and sweet jokes, because his voice was not as expressive as others were. Monotone, steady, it rarely ever changed, and you often compared him to a robot because of it. You let out a soft scoff “you don’t have to come and take care of me, you know. I’m perfectly capable of doing all of this myself.” You told him.
He hummed in reply and glanced at you, eyes glistening in the light coming through the window across the room. You always did admire his eyes, the golden centers circling his pupils. You noticed his pupils always seemed to dilate around you. You didn’t know why but you felt special because of it anyways. “You’re capable, but you don’t do it. I need linkons best hunter healthy and taken care of. Who else will protect me from wanderers, hm?” He said playfully, leaning towards you, shoulder brushing against yours. You unconsciously leaned into him and smiled, not sarcastically but a genuine, softer smile. One he always managed to draw out of you; even when you were in the sourest of moods. “I did promise, didn’t I?” He nodded at your words and tilted his head towards your cup “You did. So drink up. We’ll have food soon, and then you’re having your medication.” There it was once more, Doctor Zayne and his schedules he had made for you. He didn’t take no for an answer either, you learned that the hard way.
Having someone like him was comforting. He knew you so well, and he cared for you. Enough to take the day off to spend it with you, while you were stuck at home, sick. Infact he came over last night as well, midnight, you were sick to your stomach leaned over the toilet and he knelt down beside you, one hand keeping everything out of your way and the other carefully running up and down your back, comforting you. You couldn’t make out the words he muttered but they helped. He even sat you on the counter and gently washed the remainder from your mouth, and made you something you could keep down before bed. He’d left after that, but he came back after sometime before noon.
“You’re staring again.” Zayne stated as he finished off his tea, setting his mug down and looking at you with a raised brow. “Something on my face?” He asked. You shook your head, newfound tenderness engulfing you as you leaned in closer to him, and out of instinct he had wrapped an arm around you. “Thank you.” You murmured, and he furrowed his brows in confusion “for what?”
“Being here.” You replied, shrugging. “You’re always there for me even when I don’t ask you to be. You’ve looked after me for so long. I.. I don’t think I could ever put into words how much I appreciate you doing this.” You said softly, looking up at him. He seemed to freeze, however recovered quickly and said with the same amount of tenderness “we look after each other. That’s what we do. Now hurry. Finish your tea.” He gently leaned his head against yours, and you could feel the smile spreading over his lips. You smiled and nodded, complying. He truly was the best. You wondered if his heart raced and softened the same way yours did when you saw him, when you sat with him like this. But as you leaned into his chest to listen to his heart beat as you so frequently did, you answered your own question.
It did. You wouldn’t tell him that though. It was your little victory. It had you grinning all evening, and he teased you for it.
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Abandon | Tighnari x Reader
𓆩⟡𓆪 Beware! This is angst with no comfort! Otherwise, please enjoy~
𓆩⟡𓆪 I made this a bit shorter than it was intended but I didn’t want to make it too long and I felt like the ending was better this way.
𓆩⟡𓆪 Word count: 1367
"Ah... sorry. I'm just not in a place where I'm looking for a relationship. Thank you for your feelings; thank you for loving me. But, I can't return that love... not yet anyway."
Those were the words Tighnari had for you when you first confessed to him almost two years ago. Of course it broke your heart, but it was probably the nicest let down you could think of. You were upset, of course, but who were you to question his feelings? Tighnari was always busy with work and his studies to be in a relationship.
Relationships never seemed like they were for him, but his words had given you some inkling of hope that fueled your own feelings. The longer you spent around Tighnari, the more you felt your love for him grow. It truly felt endless. You never felt as if Tighnari took you for granted, he was just as any good friend would be. He supported you, was kind to you, encouraged you, and never judged you. Yet, there was always a feeling of emptiness that invaded your chest when you were around him.
Discontent.
No matter what, you were never satisfied with Tighnari's kindness towards you. It was never something you ever mentioned or acted upon, but you always felt like it wasn't enough. Unsurprisingly, you wanted more. You were in love with him and the gentle shoulder pats always left you wanting more.
That's when you realized your feelings had gotten out of hand. At first, being around Tighnari was enough. Just being able to see him, hear his voice, and helping to contribute to his work was enough. You weren't sure when it stopped, but now you needed to do something about it.
So, over the course of a month, you slowly began to get busier with your work. Twice a week, you would spend time with Tighnari, Cyno, Kaveh, and Alhaitham, usually playing Genius Invocation TCG. But you stopped attending due to taking on more work. Unfortunately, this led to some adverse health effects, but that was expected.
Consequently, you were called out by all four of your friends, especially Tighnari, who demanded you take some time off to take care of yourself. You felt guilty, avoiding your close friends the way you did. One thing you knew you couldn’t do was go cold turkey on Tighnari. It was a thought you just couldn’t handle so that’s why you were taking it slowly.
See, this is where things fell apart. It was a weekend and you had a day off. You went out with a friend and as you were heading home, you happened to run into the group and Cyno invited you to play Genius Invocation TCG.
“Sorry, I’ve been here a while and I’m tired.” You lied, giving them a halfhearted wave.
“Oh come on, (y/n).” Kaveh said with a frown as he placed his cards face down. “It’s been a while since you spent time with us. It’ll be fun! Hey! You can pester Tighnari about his new girlfriend.”
“Kaveh!” Tighnari hissed at his words but his friend had already spoken. Your entire body went rigid at Kaveh’s words and for a moment, everything fell silent. Your heart sank, the pit of anxiety grew within you, and the emotions slowly began to bubble.
Tighnari’s eyes slowly shifted to you, seeing that heartbroken look in your eyes. He wasn’t ready to see that. To see just how much the idea would hurt you. The remorse he fell made him realize he wasn’t as innocent as he pretended to be.
There was a very awkward silence that fell upon the group as everyone looked between you and Tighnari. The forest ranger looked guilty and you looked hurt. Even Alhaitham started to feel a little bad when he saw your face. Yet, you forced a smile, blinked back the tears, and looked at Kaveh which made the architect flinch a little.
“Sorry, I don’t have time for gossip. I’ve got an early day tomorrow but have fun on my behalf. And Tighnari, congrats on the new relationship. Didn’t know you had it in you.” There was a way you spoke that added to the guilt Tighnari felt. He knew you didn't mean that as a compliment.
With a wave, you turned and left, making all eyes land on Tighnari. The awkward silence continued for a moment before Alhaitham finally broke it.
“What the hell was that?” As usual, he was straightforward, needing answers to why you reacted the way you did.
“N-nothing. I’m sure they’re fine.” Tighnari lied as he looked at his cards. Yet, even though his eyes scanned the faces of the cards, he wasn’t thinking about the game or any strategy. He was worried about you because he knew the hope he gave you had just come crashing down. Yet, he didn’t move. The uncomfortable atmosphere remained around the four, but Tighnari remained where he was seated. ⎯⎯ ୨ A Little Later ୧ ⎯⎯
Your walk home was dreadful. Some pathetic part of you wished Tighnari would chase after you but he never did. Your entire walk home was filled with sniffling as you tried to bury the sadness down, which ultimately failed. Yet almost every moment was just waiting for him to catch up and apologize or even explain what was going on.
The words just kept repeating over and over in your head. Tighnari was in a relationship? He never told you any such thing. You weren’t even aware he had been looking. A bitter laugh escaped your lips as you approached the hill that led up to your home. You were so desperate, weren’t you? Hell, maybe he was going to tell you but you stopped hanging around him a few weeks ago.
You fooled yourself into acting as if you were completely unaware. You wanted Tighnari to love you back but acted as if it fine that he didn’t. Even after he rejected you, you hoped he would just one day come to you and declare he changed his mind. You dreamt of that day so many times, yet out of all the scenarios you made up, this wasn’t one of them.
You saw the look in his eyes. He knew how you felt and there was some inkling of guilt within his gaze. Yet, knowing that he might have felt some form of realization brought you no solace. You didn’t care if he was understood- not right now anyway. Knowing him, he probably wasn't even sorry.
Who was this girl he was dating? Did she work with him? Work with one of the others? Did you know her?
So many questions filled your mind that would remain unanswered for the foreseeable future. Your hand rubbed your wet cheek as you pushed your door open and closed it behind you. Your other hand mindlessly slid against the door and finding the lock, and turning it.
Your home felt… dreary. There was that silence that made the loneliness settle within you. Dropping your bag at your feet, you just walked inside and laid down on your couch. Your eyes stare at the ceiling and you were acutely aware when your vision began to blur with tears.
Soft sobs escaped your lips no matter how hard you tried to choke them down. You were angry. Angry at yourself for feeling this way, angry at Tighnari for giving you hope the day you confessed, angry at that girl who had him or whatever. No matter what you did, the tears just wouldn't stop. So, you just let go- you let those emotions flow out of you instead of holding them back.
You officially had to move on. Tighnari really didn’t feel the same way and you needed to let go of these stupid feelings. He wasn’t obligated to love you and you weren’t obligated to be friends with him. Especially since it was so painful. But that dull ache returned and you looked around your living space for any form of comfort. Yet, there was none. You were all alone.
There was a lingering thought in your head which kept reminding you every few moments that… Tighnari never came after you.
#tighnari x reader#genshin tighnari#tighnari angst#genshin x reader#genshin impact x reader#angst#genshin angst#gender neutral reader#🖊─ pocky’s writings#angst no comfort
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nap time ; park sunghoon
idol!sunghoon x gn!reader
warnings: arguments (very brief), talks of self-doubt & being over-worked, that’s it really ??
wc: 614
synopsis: you simply wish sunghoon would communicate with you more
“Sunghoon!”
“I don’t know what you fucking expect from me anymore, y/n,” Sunghoon paused to let out a dry laugh before looking back in your direction. He was never quite making eye contact with you, as if he was avoiding it. “You want this one second, this the next, I’m too fucking busy.”
All you could do was feel yourself freeze at the sound of his words, they stung in a way you don’t think you can articulate. You were aware of the sacrifices you made two years ago when you started your relationship with the idol, and you deemed every single one worth it. You had Sunghoon, that was all you needed. Oh, how naive you were.
“I’m so sorry for wanting my boyfriend to act like one,” you paused to collect yourself in an attempt to hold back the poison-filled words threatening to leave your mouth. “You’re never home, Sunghoon. I know this is your job and dream, and I’m so happy you get to experience it. But I want to see you for more than thirty minutes in passing in the morning.”
You watched Sunghoon’s flat expression falter before he spoke, still avoiding any form of eye contact, “I can’t stop doing this now y/n and you know that. You know that better than anyone. I- I’m getting solo activity opportunities and I just, I can’t turn them down.”
“Why, Sunghoon? Why can’t you turn them down?” You finally took a few steps closer to the man in front of you, forcing him to make eye contact with you.
“Can’t let the boys down, can’t let ENGENE down, can’t let myself down, can’t let,” Sunghoon paused for a second before continuing, “let you down.”
“Do you really think you can let me down, Hoon?”
“I- yeah, and for myself, I have to say yes to every opportunity given. I have to be grateful and do it, no matter the cost,” his face fell flat once more.
“But what about your health Sunghoon?”
You reached to grab his hand before holding it between both of your own, “Don’t you think the boys, ENGENE, and myself care about your wellbeing more? This isn’t even about me, Sunghoon. When I say let’s go out to eat, let’s watch a movie, whatever- I say it so you’ll have a proper meal, you’ll relax, just something.”
“But the company-”
You cut him off before he could even finish his sentence, “Yeah, fuck that.”
Sunghoon couldn’t help but finally smile at your remark, glancing down at your intertwined hands, “You know it’s not that easy…”
“But we can pretend it is.”
Hoon couldn’t help but laugh at your words, “I wish it was that easy love, I really do…” He removed the hand that was glued to his side to wrap it around your waist to pull you even closer to him.
“How about this, promise me instead of acting like everything is fine, bottling it up, and running yourself into the ground, you’ll talk to me. Even if it means nothing changes for a while, but you at least talk about it, hm?”
You remove both of yours hands from his to run one through his hair, purposefully ruffling it up with a smile on your face.
“Yeah… I can promise that,” Hoon finally pulls you into a hug and does his hardest to hide his face in the crook of your neck before pressing a light kiss to your shoulder.
“So, can we go take a nap now? I think my Hoonie needs some very much deserved rest.”
All you heard was a short hum of agreement in response.
“Nap time it is.”
#enhypen fluff#enhypen x reader#enhypen scenarios#enhypen imagine#sunghoon x reader#sunghoon fluff#sunghoon imagine#sunghoon imagines#sunghoon drabbles#enhypen drabbles
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“you’re warm, c’mere.” — blue lock boys ♡
when the blue lock boys take care of you when you’re sick.
ft. sae, kaiser, rin & isagi x f!reader
author’s note: OH MY LORD I FINALLY FINISHED THIS ! i‘m writing this while i’m in immense pain so this idea came through !! we went from like 400 to 700 in two weeks so one omfg how?? and second of all thank u all i love u sm from the bottom of my heart ♡ i'm still working on requests sadly,, hopefully i can finish them soon and i'm also thinking of releasing a fic,, but anyways enjoy the fluff ♡
itoshi sae:
to be honest, if you were in the decline of becoming more and more sick, sae wouldn’t be able to notice. he was just away from your house too much to be able to see your health slowly going down the drain. so the day you are physically unable to get out of bed, is coincidentally the same day sae’s practice runs extremely late. he’s almost jogging home, not wanting to worry you.
but when he opens the door to your shared home, he’s confused when all the light are still off, and everything seems untouched. “[name]? where are you?” and still, there was no response. his first instinct is to check your bedroom, because maybe you had just fallen asleep early this time around. so when sae slowly opens the door and sees you sitting there, eyes barely open and dark, hair disheveled and drinking water out of a tiny cup, his heart cracks.
“sweetheart,, what happened?” he closes the door behind him, going across to sit next to you. sae pats your hair down, giving you a hug so you can sniffle in his chest. “mm, think i came down a fever or somethin’, it was really bad when i woke up today. but you left early.” sae quite genuinely felt bad for not noticing, what kind of boyfriend doesn't realize? all while he's mentally shaming himself, you let out a loud (but still cute) sneeze, catching him out of his thoughts.
"sorry.. was practice okay?" you murmured, pulling the blanket back onto your now half warm body. he leans over you as you’re now tucked back into bed, looking at the way your cheeks are clearly flushed red and the faintest difference in the way you’re breathing, struggling. sae feels even worse looking at you now, so he finally realizes that he should do whatever he can to help you feel comfortable.
he removes his jacket, setting it on the bed as he goes out to the kitchen to make you some of your favourite food, not forgetting to bring the medicine that for some reason is all the way at the end of the cupboard. he sets it down all on a little tray, carefully walking towards your room once again where sae still sees you laying down in the same position from when he left the room.
"hmhmmm, mi amor, time to eat." sae hums at you, continuing the soft melody as puts the tray on the nightstand next to your bed, once again leaning over you; but this time he takes the cover off of you slowly, giving a soft smile towards your face as he sees how peaceful you look. “he estado pensando en ti.” (i’ve been thinking about you.) in his head, he thinks it’s stupid, the fact that he’s confessing what’s he’s felt to your unconscious self.
maybe it’s just an subconscious choice he always had in him, but something special about itoshi sae was confessing his love to you when you couldn’t hear him. maybe because he didn’t want to be embarrassed, or it was much easier like this. nonetheless, he doesn’t mind showing you affection in moments like these when you really need him.
his eyes widen in surprise when you turn around with a smile on your face, slowly opening your eyes and propping yourself up on your elbows. “pienso en ti también.” you giggled, still feeling the hoarseness in your throat. a visible dust of red scatters across his cheeks as his eyes gaze away, still gently rubbing your hair as he encourages you to eat what he made you. “i love you, okay? now please eat instead of staying under those covers all day.” sae lightly smiles.
michael kaiser:
like sae, kaiser is also way too busy with matches during the neo egoist league, so he’s barely home. he’s up at dawn and comes back way after you’ve fallen asleep. he tries to text you every now and then, also checking on you when he comes home before he goes to sleep beside you. but perhaps he had gotten so busy that he forgot to check on you the past couple of days, and that’s when your fever erupted.
you and kaiser can both be a little.. silly at times. how does this come into your being sick? well one day when kaiser comes home, expecting to maybe see you passed out on the couch or being welcome by a dark home, he sees you lying flat on the floor. at first he laughs at you, thinking this must be some kind of dumb prank you wanted to pull on him, but once you start whimpering in pain, he’s immediately at your side.
“okay my love, why the hell are you on the ground and what’s going on?” he’s sitting in front of you, trying to put his arms under your shoulders as he lifts you up to sit in front of him. oh, it all hits kaiser like a truck once he realizes. how could he not? your face is red, eyes are swollen, and you can barely even sit up on your own. you probably would have collapsed right back into the same spot if it weren’t for him holding you up.
“everything… hurts..” you’re barely able to sigh out. your head falls down, and kaiser swears his heart is aching at the sight. he’s already lifting you up into his arms and taking you to your room, where he lets you lie down for a bit while he almost sprints into the washroom to start a bath for you. if anything, he wants you to be relaxed right now.
“michael..” your voice is hoarse as you call out to him, kind of in a daze as you try and get up. he comes back out, reassuring that he hasn’t left your side. “i’m right here, baby. started something for ya.” he puts your arm around his shoulder as he helps you walk a couple of steps to the bathroom.
kaiser only really bothers to take off your shirt because he doesn’t want you to be uncomfortable having to take off everything. he helps you sit down in the tub, and he joins you as well, sitting right across from you. he made sure to put some nice smelling soap to help you relax while extending his arms to rub some on your face.
“why didn’t you tell me you were falling ill, liebe?” he questions, not really expecting you to answer because he knew you were tired. “mm? didn’t wanna worry you ‘cause you’ve been so busy..” you reply, keeping your eyes closed. “you know i would drop practice to take care of you, right?” he explains, and internally you were well aware of it. it just didn’t stop you from not wanting kaiser to worry about it. so you let out a little hum in acknowledgement.
“i know what you’re thinking, but too bad. i’m staying at home with you now until you’re all better again.” he retorts, and you know he’s being more than just serious when he says that. “mikka, really? you don’t have to.” you quietly murmur, moving your hands up from the water. “yeah, says the one who was face flat on the floor when i walked in. you almost gave me a heart attack!” you let out a tiny giggle from that, not really remembering how you got there. “my turn to take care of you.” kaiser finally says, holding your hand in his as he has plans to pamper you to the fullest.
itoshi rin:
it’s when rin walked into your shared apartment when he saw you sprawled out across the couch. clearly, you weren’t okay, so his eyebrows furrowed deeply seeing you in such a condition. he walked over to you, looming over your frail figure as a pained reflection fills his eyes.
“rin..? why are you standing over me like that..?” you asked in a shocked but still quiet voice. as you tried to push yourself up with your elbows, rin crouched down as he pushed you back onto the couch gently.
“y’know as much as i love you, and i’m saying this in the nicest context possible, but you look like shit.”
your eyes widen for a second, but then you start to let a laugh out until you’re profusely coughing, causing rin to pick you up and sit you in his lap facing him. “i’m gonna get you sick rin, let me get off..” you try and get away from him; you really do. but he’s just as, if not more stubborn than you are, keeping his hands firmly planted on your waist.
he puts his hand on your forehead, his eyes showcasing more worry than before. “quit jumping, you’re burning up a lot. when did this even start?” you glance away, not wanting to tell him the truth, but rin is quick to catch on to even the most subtle of moves. so he grabs your chin to turn you back to him, looking for an answer in you eyes.
"you better tell me." he warns, brushing your hair out of your face, softly caressing your cheek right after that, urging you to give him an honest answer. “seriously, what���s gotten into you…” you blush away at his affection. usually he doesn’t pry you this much for information, no matter what has happened. but the way his eyes gaze all over, you can tell he’s genuinely worried. rin would be terrified if something bad had happened to you.
“okay, just c’mere please.” you’re already quite close to him, but you know he means to let him envelop his arms around you as you both lie down on the couch again. however this time, he’s there to make sure you can sleep peacefully; with no distractions and that if something does happen or if there’s something you need, rin is able to do it for you.
so as soon as he hears your light little snores as you quietly shuffle in his arms to get comfortable, he slowly releases his grip from you and gives you more space on the couch. really, he does wish that he could just hold you in his arms forever, (not that he would voice that want out loud, ever.) but he wanted to help around the house and get you some medicine, food and set up stuff to raise your spirits.
getting the medicine is easy, plus rin learned how to cook at a young age. he just.. didn’t really know what to do to help you feel emotionally better about this whole sick thing. he’s thinking about while he stands over the stove, slowing zoning out trying to think of something. but as quick as he was to zone out, was snapped back into reality when he heard your very obvious, groggy voice calling out his name.
“rin.. what are you doing..? why’d you leave..?” he kind of panicked at that moment, he wanted anything but for you to wake up and see what he was doing. “just uh.. was making some food for you.” he curtly said, lowkey embarrassed that you saw him doing something so… romantic for you.
“aww, you’re so cu-” you really wanted to finish that sentence, too bad your cough beat you to it, knocking the air out of your lungs and you held onto the counter for dear life. of course, rin was right next to you in an instant, rubbing soft circles around your back, then getting you a glass of water as you calmed down. as you drank from the glass, taking a deep breath in, you couldn’t help but notice rin staring at you with a soft smile. “yeah, you are cute, even when you’re sick.”
isagi yoichi:
isagi like goes through an entire (kinda overdramatic) monologue in his head when you fall to the common cold. it’s hard to explain, but unlike sae and kaiser, isagi notices quick. he doesn’t like spending time away from you, so he mostly comes home on time. he honestly finds it really adorable when your always sitting on a chair near the entrance and waiting to welcome him home.
until one day that just.. doesn’t happen. he’s confused to say the least, but then when he sees you come out of your shared room, a small blanket wrapped around you as you sniffle, he realizes what’s going on. so he drops his stuff into he ground and quickly goes over to you go wrap you in a tight hug.
“welcome back..” you say while letting out a cough into his shoulder. “what happened, [name]?” isagi whispered in your ear, rubbing his hand over your hair as you both rocked back and forth from time to time. “i think i’m sick, ‘ichi… i woke up today and my stomach was hurting really bad..” you murmured back as a response.
“aw, poor baby, must have been bad while i was gone, yeah?” usually this would sound like some sort of mocking, but he does it because isagi feels the need to protect you, and he likes talking to you like that sometimes. he thinks you deserve the princess treatment and he’ll indulge you. you more than just like it, and you’ll become a lot more clingier once he starts to speak to you in that tone. (maybe that’s why he does it so often) 
isagi lifts you up, letting you cling onto him like a koala bear as he takes you to couch nearby, letting your blanket fall to the ground. “my blanket, yoichi..” you complain, losing the only source of body heat you had. “silly, i’m here now, i’ll give you what you need.” your face turns red at that, cause he’s just so sweet. “aww, she’s blushing. how cute.” you put a hand to his mouth to shut him up, not having the energy to talk.
he grabs your wrist to pull your hand away from his face, before giving it a little kiss and wrapping his arms around you again. he’ll stay close to you all he likes, isagi could care less about getting sick. if it means staying at home with you, right? “hurts here, right?” placing a hand on your stomach, he soothingly rubs small circles trying to ease the tension. “i hope this helps, even a little.. hm.. did you have medicine, cutie?” he asks, pressing a chaste kiss to your neck and leaning his head forward.
“mhm, was too lazy to get out of bed.” you answer, leaning into him at the feeling. it was much more relaxing than having to toss and turn in your bed. he lets you go for a second, sprints to the kitchen to find the medicine and runs back, almost tripping over the blanket you dropped earlier. “be careful, ‘ichi! if you’re gonna get hurt, who’s gonna take care of me?” you pout at him, clearly enjoying the time you’ve spent together since isagi’s come home.
he smiles at you because he just couldn’t help but think how adorable you are, even when you’re sick. he brings you into his arms again, lying down with you. “don’t worry, princess. i’ll stay here as long as you want to take care of you.” he presses a kiss against your forehead, letting you slowly drift off to sleep.

#blue lock#blue lock x reader#blue lock x y/n#blue lock x you#bllk x reader#blue lock imagines#blue lock itoshi sae#itoshi sae#itoshi sae x reader#bllk kaiser#blue lock isagi#blue lock fluff#blue lock michael kaiser#blue lock itoshi rin#bllk itoshi sae#bllk isagi#bllk rin#bllk fluff#bllk sae#bllk imagines#bllk michael kaiser#isagi yoichi#isagi x reader#kaiser x reader#itoshi rin x reader
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Lonely in Misery
Requested Here!
Part 2 Here: Lonelier in Misery
Pairing: Tim Bradford x fem!paramedic!reader
Summary: Bailey notices that you're lonely and miserable while Nolan notices the same about Tim. They decide to set you up on a blind date, but it only ends with more sadness.
Warnings: mention of motorcycle accident, pure fluff (the title and summary are misleading, my bad)
Word Count: 2.0k+ words
A/N: @newobsessionweekly here's some soft Tim if you're interested🥰
Masterlist | Tim Bradford Masterlist | Request Info/Fandom List
“Let’s go!” your chief calls. “Motorcycle accident on Wilshire.”
You nod as you gather your equipment. Being a paramedic is stressful, but you work with an amazing team. It’s too bad you don’t have the same kind of community in your personal life. Working with your best friends is great until you can’t hang out or talk to anyone because they’re on different shifts.
“Single rider?” you ask as you climb into the ambulance.
“Dispatch didn’t say. Only called for one ambulance, so I assume,” your chief replies.
“Hey, maybe it’ll be a single guy and you can nurse him back to health and finally get a date,” your teammate in the driver’s seat jokes.
“Ignore him,” Bailey says, rolling her eyes.
“Ignore who?” you tease.
As the BLS rescue ambulance pulls out, you sit back in your seat.
“Are you okay?” Bailey asks softly.
“Fine,” you reply. “Just… I don’t know.”
“I get it. We, uh, we haven’t been able to hang out in a while. What have you been up to?”
“Nothing. Work, eat, workout, sleep, repeat.”
“Yeah, you’ve been kind of mopey.” She reaches her hand toward you and smiles when you lay your hand in hers. “This job is hard enough without being lonely. Why don’t you go on a date or just go hang out somewhere, meet somebody?”
You shake your head and brush off her concern with a half-true promise, “I’ll be fine. I’m looking forward to when our schedules give us time to be friends again. If I can get out away from Nolan, of course.”
Bailey smiles and rolls her eyes but squeezes your hand reassuringly. You know she isn’t convinced that you’re fine. Your job is more important, though, so you decide to focus on the motorcycle rider who needs your help rather than the empty home, the empty life you’ll go home to after your shift ends.
“Hey!” Tim yells harshly. “Socialize on your own time, boot!”
His new rookie ducks his head and walks quickly after abandoning his conversation. Tim has been grumpier than usual lately, and he’s taking it out on everyone in the station. When he yelled at Sergeant Grey, who only shook his head and told Tim to take a breather, Nolan knew what was happening.
“He’s lonely, right?” Nolan asks Angela.
“Incredibly,” she answers without hesitation. “It’s been worse, though, so his sports buddies must have gotten busy, married, something.”
Nolan nods. He has an idea, but he knows better than to suggest Tim go on a date where he could overhear or be told. As he walks toward his shop, Nolan makes a mental note to ask Bailey if she knows anyone who would be willing to go on a date with Mid-Wilshire’s resident grump.
“Do I look like I care about your engagement party?” Tim asks across the garage.
“Hey,” Nolan says as he walks into the house.
“Hi,” Bailey replies.
Nolan hugs Bailey and sighs against her.
“I need your help with something,” Bailey says.
“Anything,” Nolan replies as he steps back. “But I need a favor, too.”
“My best friend is lonely and needs a date.”
Nolan’s brows raise as he adds, “My coworker is lonely and needs a date.”
“Did we just plan a blind date in under thirty seconds? Are we really that good?”
“Depends. Is your friend interested in someone like Tim Bradford?”
Bailey considers the pairing for a moment but smiles as she pictures you balancing Tim and him providing an edge that you haven’t experienced in years.
“Oh, yeah,” Bailey decides. “She’ll be interested.”
“Great! Now I just have to convince him to actually go on the date,” Nolan muses.
“Good luck.” Bailey laughs before she realizes, “I have to get her to let me set her up too.”
“Well, if she’s anything like Tim, appeal to her misery.”
“Yeah, because it’s better than absolutely nothing and complete unhappiness is the perfect way to pitch a date,” Bailey scoffs. “I’ll get my friend there, and you convince Tim your way.”
“I hope this works,” they say together.
“What’d you do last night?” Bailey asks as you exit the locker room.
You step back in surprise at being ambushed the moment you arrive but recover quickly. “I made dinner, watched a movie, and went to bed. Why?”
“Because you’ve got a date tonight, so we’re switching it up.”
“Bailey,” you begin.
“No, no, hear me out before you decline. Please? I’m doing this as your best friend, I promise.”
“Okay,” you sigh. “Pitch this guy. But, Bailey Nune, if you say it’s Nolan’s brother Pete I will find a new best friend.”
“Oh, no. I love you, I would never do that. Besides, the whole point of a blind date is that I don’t tell you the guy’s name. But…” She raises her finger to emphasize as she adds, “Nolan and I both know him well and he’s a great guy.”
“You’re gonna have to give me more. I don’t want to go on a date just to say that I didn’t spend another night alone, Bailey.”
“Completely. I know you, though, okay, and this guy he’s- he can do and be everything you want. The romance, the connection, the best friend that is also your life partner, what you are looking for in a guy, this is it. I promise. And, if I’m wrong, I’ll bail you out of the date and I will clean your equipment for the rest of the month.”
You purse your lips as you think about her offer. She does know exactly what you want in a man, and you trust Bailey’s judgement. “Fine. I’ll go on the date.”
“Yes!” Bailey cheers as she hugs you. “I’m so glad. You’ll feel so much better after you’re not miserable and lonely anymore.”
“You should’ve been a motivational speaker,” you deadpan. “Now don’t mention it again until we get off. This can’t be the topic of conversation for the rest of the day; I’ll never live it down.”
“I’ll stay quiet and think of the perfect outfit for you,” Bailey says as she follows you into the heart of the station.
“Officer Bradford,” Nolan calls as he walks across the bullpen.
“Yeah?” Tim asks.
“I’ve got a proposition for you. Or a question, idea, whatever you want to call it.”
“Then spit it out, Nolan.”
“Right, yes, sir. Bailey has a single friend, and we want to set you up on a blind date.”
Tim’s face remains impassive as he shakes his head. “Pass. Ask Aaron.”
“No, Tim, I’m asking you.”
“And I’m not interested,” Tim argues.
“Look, you’re lonely and miserable, so you’re making all of us miserable. I know you – sort of – and I know this woman. She could be really good for you.”
“If you’re wrong? Because I think you are.”
“Then leave the date! You’re not losing anything more than a few hours.”
Tim takes a deep breath before he asks, “Why do you think she’d be good for me?”
“She can be the balance that you need, and she understands some of what we deal with daily.”
“Don’t tell me she’s a lawyer.”
“Oh, no, I know better than that. So… is that a yes?”
“It’s a hesitant yes,” Tim answers. “When?”
“Tonight.”
Tim nods once before he walks away to reprimand a rookie. Nolan watches him yell and hopes that he and Bailey are right. Because if they’re wrong and the date goes poorly, Tim will be worse in the morning.
You sit in the front of the restaurant and await your date. Bailey said he’d arrive after you. She never explained how you were supposed to find each other, though. As you watch people come and go, you grow discouraged. You shift your attention from the door to your hands. Several minutes pass before the door opens again, and you look up but don’t expect anything.
“Tim?” you ask.
You’ve seen Tim Bradford several times in passing. At wrecks, crime scenes, and various Los Angeles law enforcement meetings. He’s always been kind to you, and you remember that you may have mentioned finding him attractive to Bailey before.
“I’ll assume you’re my blind date, then,” Tim replies. He smiles as he adds, “I’m not as disappointed as I expected to be.”
“Wow,” you say through laughter. “If I’d known you were such a flirt, I would’ve asked Bailey to set us up sooner.”
Tim shakes his head, and you join his side as he gives his name to the hostess. As you walk to the table, a sudden awkwardness descends. There’s no good way to begin a conversation on a blind date, you realize. Tim takes his hand against the menu but looks similarly lost about what to say.
“I guess being lonely and desperate worked in my favor,” you joke.
“Oh, I can guarantee that I was lonelier and more desperate,” Tim replies. “Nolan used that to convince me to come tonight; said I was making everyone else miserable with my misery.”
The mood lightens with your playful jokes, and you smile at Tim.
“Since you’ve had to pull an arson suspect off me before, should we skip the small talk?” you ask Tim over your menu. “Or do this the normal way?”
“There’s nothing normal about this,” Tim comments.
Your phone buzzes in your bag, but the Are you still miserable? text from Bailey goes unread.
“Okay, I hate this,” you murmur as you set the menu aside. “Can I just sit beside you?”
Tim’s smile grows as he stands and offers his hand. Once you’re seated beside him, where you don’t have to lean across the table to talk, you don’t even remember the miserable feeling that led Bailey to set this date up.
Tim leans over to whisper, “I’m glad I agreed to the date,” and you move closer to him as you answer, “Me too.”
As you walk out of the restaurant with your hand in Tim’s and a joyful smile on your face, you don’t want the night to end.
“Same time next week?” you ask as Tim slows.
“What about the same time another day this week?” he suggests. “I had a great time, and I want to go out again. If that’s what you want, of course.”
You pull your phone out and hand it to Tim, ignoring Bailey’s text. He puts his number in and texts himself, so he has your number, too. You grow giddy, something you thought was a thing of your past.
“I think this is the best date I’ve ever been on,” you tell Tim as you begin walking again. “Thank you.”
“Nolan and Bailey are gonna take credit if we tell them the blind date worked,” Tim points out.
“Yeah,” you agree, drawing out the word. “But I don’t think I can hide how happy tonight made me. Not from Bailey, at least.”
Tim nods like he understands as you stop. You turn to face him, and he raises the hand that isn’t in yours to hold your cheek. There isn’t a question or doubt in your mind as you kiss Tim. What was supposed to be a date to cheer you up and get you back out of your mundane, lonely life is already becoming so much more. As Tim releases your hand to hold you and pull you closer, your entire world brightens. Neither you nor Tim are lonely, let alone miserable, with the prospect of a new relationship with one another. You pull back when you can’t stop smiling against Tim’s lips.
“Thanks,” you whisper.
“For what?”
“All of it.”
Tim smiles and brushes his thumb under your bottom lip. “If I don’t see you before Friday, I’m looking forward to our date. And I’ll pick you up at the fire station.”
“Are you sure about that?” you question. “Bailey will tell John.”
“They’ll have to learn sooner rather than later that there’s no room for them in our relationship.”
Your smile grows at our relationship, but you lick your lips to keep your excitement from showing. “They’re both born meddlers.”
“Let’s stop talking about them,” Tim murmurs as he leans in again.
Bonus:
When you arrive home, you see the text from Bailey and answer: More miserable than you can imagine. I’m going to sleep to escape it. Sure, you left off the part about being sad because the date ended, but she’ll find out soon enough.
#tim bradford x reader#tim bradford x y/n#tim bradford x you#tim bradford x fem!reader#tim bradford fic#tim bradford fluff#tim bradford imagine#tim bradford the rookie#tim bradford#the rookie x reader#the rookie abc#fem!reader#requests#hanna writes✯
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heyyyyy sliding back in here lol
what about soft!jason who just knows when reader needs a hug? like not specific mental health issues but jason just notices a drained reader and decides to clear his aft to take care of his girl??
(this may or may not be completely self-indulgent...)
sending love <333
Heeeeelp not me relating too much to this for the rest of the weeeeekk 💀✨
A lot of scenarios came to mind but this was the most easiest to me
—
What’s an obvious talent with nearly every member of the so called “Batfamily,” was the detective skills. The ability to observe and take in details, noticing the slightest shift in demeanor. Just harnessing the unique gift until it’s second nature was a gift in itself.
Jason wasn’t one to flaunt those abilities of his, but right now, he feels his mind working overdrive trying to figure you out.
As in, figure out your slumped body taking up most of the couch after you collapse on it. Your face hidden away behind the comforter, hiding from the harsh society of the daily grind that always found a way to bug the hell out of you after you believe you’re finally starting to get the hang of it.
“Can I have some couch time, too?” Came Jason’s soft question, gently prodding what he assumed was your shoulder. Your shuffling body grants him permission to settle along the slim space beside you, leaving you undisturbed in your sensory deprivation cocoon.
“Bad day at work, Huh?”
“Mhm.” Came a bland little muffle.
“Want me to make some calls?” Jason offers in an ever so snarky tone. “Take care of some business?”
“Please.” You murmur, taking him by surprise.
By that, he always references using violence just to get a rise outta you, knowing you’d usually click your tongue, roll your eyes, or smack him on the shoulder for his idiocy. This time, you agreed to it, maybe even consider mentally encouraging it.
This wasn’t the first time you agreed, but whenever you did was usually on ‘not so good’ days. Today looked like a ‘not so good’ day.
“Aww, babygirl.” Jason’s arms reinforce around your body, cradling you to himself like a treasured doll.
“Show me what’s underneath this blanket city you got goin’ on.” Jason pinched the fabric with two fingers, giving gentle tugs. “Show me that gorgeous face, pretty girl.”
Your reluctance was to be expected, but you give in. Your flushed face is greeted with crisp air before Jason comes to view, smiling softly with all his handsome beauty.
“There’s my girl,” he whispers, brushing some stray hair tussled by the blanket off to the side.
“Got some soda earlier. Want an ice cream float to feel better?” He asks, watching your head shift as you gesture a no. So distressed, you’d turn away a childhood tradition? Ouch.
“Hmm,” Jason tilts his head back in thought, clicking his tongue. “Need me to kill your boss?”
You nod yes, per his amusement.
“Agh, damn. You should’ve asked me that about a year ago, babe. Fresh outta the ‘soul refund pool’ me woulda’ done so in a heartbeat.”
You groan, hiding your face further in the valley of his neck while his hands rub circles along different points of your back. “S’okay sweetheart. I know what it’s like to wanna kill your boss, but you’re not at work right now.”
He easily shuffles you around as he spoke, hoisting you into his lap in a seated position.
“You’re home with me, safe an’ sound,” he continues as he pulls off your shoes, running his hands along your lower legs to soothe the muscles. “An’ I’m here. Real world isn’t gonna getcha in here.”
Jason’s lips on your forehead settles the sting of bitterness you’ve carried in your chest for hours. He knew just what to say, how to act, and held enough patience for the both of you combined.
You adored him. Your giant red teddy bear.
“Wanna do something fun, babe? Wanna watch an old horror movie?”
The silliest of habits you had with Jason was judging the movies you used to find scary back in the day. While some lived up to their name on the gore filled horror scare, the SFX and editing left something to nearly choke on popcorn over.
After that, it was good habit to end movie night on a comedy. The early Y2K movie parodies seemed to always hit the spot. 
You nod yes to this, craving that relief now more than ever.
“Bet that ice cream is starting to sound good now, huh?” Jason muses, his smirk growing as your head shuffles a yes again.
Thought so.
#jason todd#jason todd x reader#jason todd x you#jason todd x fem!reader#dc jason todd#jason todd x y/n#we need mimis
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Waterlog || pjm (4)
Pairing: Jimin x Reader Other tags: Olympic Swimmer!Jimin, Ex Olympic Swimmer! Reader, Swim Coach!Reader Genre: Strangers to Friends to Lovers!AU, Coach!AU, Swimming!AU, HEAVY Angst, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, fluff, eventual smut, I'm so soft for these two it's crazy. Word Count: 11.8k+ Synopsis: After a car accident ends her athletic career, Y/N has slowly started rebuilding her life again as a high school swim coach. That’s until she gets a request from an old friend and finds herself back in the spotlight as the new coach of Olympic swimmer, Park Jimin. Warnings: ANGST, crying, mental health issues, talking about mental health, I'm so soft for them it's actually wild, best boyfriend Jimin, did I say angst????, past drug use, past alcohol addiction, past trauma talk, crying, anxiety, hand holding, touching as a love language, Jimin can't keep his hands to himself, he does try his best though, pining, sexual tension, banter, I love these two A/N: I know we're a couple of weeks late updating, but I've been very busy with moving so I haven't had the energy to write. I did a very quick edit, so this might not be perfect. I'm planning on coming back once I'm in my new place to do a full proofread. Hope you like the update!
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Hand clutching my phone, I sighed. All around me the airport buzzed with life. I had almost forgotten how hectic the Denver Airport was. A few feet away I saw a mother struggling to keep her children together while her husband scrolled on his phone. I must have made some sort of noise, subconsciously voicing my annoyance, because Jimin laughed.
“What’s going on, gran?” He teased, voice light. “See a couple of youngins on your lawn?”
I scoffed, tearing my eyes away from the family. “Just a shitty husband ignoring his children.”
He hissed, sucking in air through his teeth, “The worst kind of dude. Are you alright?”
Softening, I finally spotted my luggage on the conveyor belt. Twisting my torso, I did a light stretch and then quickly snatched the heavy bag up. “Not too anxious, right?”
He had been very worried about letting me come home for a visit. When I had originally brought it up he offered himself up for the job, but I was not a fan of that idea. My friends would definitely bring up our date and I did not want to deal with the awkwardness that would cause. Especially since we had yet to go on it. That would not matter to Hoseok, however, and the teasing would have been endless. Better to spare Jimin from their wrath for just a little while longer.
“I’m cool,” I replied, softening. “Just got my stuff from baggage claim. I’m going to let you go so I can call Andy.”
“Okay bug. See you in a few days.”
Harper had recently started calling me that, forgetting my real name and not caring enough to ask for it. Eloise had tried to scold her for it, but I told her I did not mind it. It caught on with Cameron not too long after that, and soon the entire Park family had started using the little nickname. Jimin thought it was adorable from the beginning but had only started using it after our talk the other night.
I laughed, “I’m going to call you tonight.”
“Aw,” I knew he had that stupid smile on his face. “Miss me that much?”
“Someone needs to make sure you’re staying out of trouble,” I replied, a confident pep in my step I had not had in years. “But yes, I do miss you.”
There was a pregnant pause.
“I miss you too.”
I could feel my heart melting. I was still getting used to our new dynamic. On most days we were strictly business, and were able to set aside the very large, very apparent elephant in the room. It was not until we had finished with work that those roles dropped, and we were able to just be us.
Ever since my confession in the car Jimin spoke a hell of a lot more. Apparently, he had a hard time keeping his feelings to himself and chose to talk a little less in order to avoid a slip up. He wanted to give us both a little bit of time to get to know one another before springing his crush on me.
“Going soft, kid?” Playing things off with humor was Jimin’s thing, but it had slowly started to rub off on me. “It’s only two days.”
“I know,” He pouted. “Call your friend. It’s cold and you’ll get sick.”
“Hey,” I cut the teasing tone I had, “You’re not upset I came here by myself, right?”
“No,” He chuckled with an unmistakable fondness. “I’m just messin’ with you. I’m not ready to meet your friends and you need some alone time. We’re good, I promise.”
I sighed in relief, “Okay. Good. I’m going to go now. Talk to you later?”
“Call me when you can,” He replied, voice light.
“Okay, bye.”
“Bye, bug.”
I was disappointed to hear the line go dead but knew I could aimlessly walk around this airport all day if given the chance, so long as he was there with me. Trying to get my thoughts back on track, I sent a text to Andy asking if she was here yet. If not, I was already making plans to call Jimin back.
Andy: I’m parked in 5 near C Gates
Andy: Be careful
Andy: Saw a lady almost get hit by a car just now
Me: See you in a sec
Me: Should I be worried?
I knew she was trying to make a joke, but car accident punchlines never went over all that well with me. Even if I knew the chances of that happening to me were almost zero, I really did not want to have a panic attack in the airport parking lot.
Andy: Not at all. I’m so sorry for even saying anything. I can come meet you at the doors if you want.
Deep breath. In. Out. In. Out. Deep breath. In. Out. In. Out. Sigh of relief. I was fine.
Me: I appreciate you
Me: Is babygirl here?
Dani would help the spike of anxiety dissipate. The girl was fearless and was sure to be distracting enough to keep me from paying attention to the oncoming traffic. I suddenly wished that Jimin was here. He always knew what to do.
Andy: Jin and I are weak
Andy: We let her play hooky
Bobbing and weaving through bodies, I tossed my phone into my purse and made my way out of the airport. The arrivals station was packed, and I would need to take the automated train to where Andrea was parked. It was my least favorite part about this airport, but it beat Dallas-Fort Worth by a landslide. I had gotten lost in that airport more times than I could count.
Three minutes later I was getting out of the train and stepping into C Gates. I could smell Auntie Anne’s and felt my mouth begin to water. Checking my clock, I decided it would not hurt to make a quick spot for lunch. Andy would appreciate it and I knew Dani loved their pretzel dog.
There was a little less traffic in C Gates. More of the expensive airlines let out here, and all you could see were business professionals pacing back and forth. A family on vacation bumped into me while I was waiting in line, and I almost gave up my spot when their toddler started screaming.
“No, no,” His mother insisted, her hair a mess on the top of her head. “Between the girls and my mom, we’ll be here all day. Go ahead, sweetie.”
Two little girls danced around me as we waited, the line moving at a snail's pace due to the airport being understaffed. They asked me questions incessantly, and while their mother had tried her best to keep them in line, I told her I was fine with the extra attention. I loved kids and the girls were harmless. The boy in her arms kept repeating “pizza” and soon an elderly woman joined them.
If the girls talked a lot, they had nothing on grandma. Not only did she never shut her mouth, she was loud and obnoxiously laughing every few seconds. The boy was quick to beg to be in her arms and mom got a break. She was back to attempting to corral the girls, but again they did not really listen.
“They’re only like this when my mom’s around,” She sighed, frustrated and tired. “We’re meeting up with their father and they’re all a little restless.”
“It’s no bother,” I lied. The girls really were not that bad. Just a couple of four-year-olds having fun. The only person who was really getting on my nerves was her mother, but I was not about to say that. “Better to get it out now than in the car, right?”
She cracked a tired smile, “Right.”
Finally, it was my turn to order. The young girl behind the counter gave me an award-winning smile while another young blonde was in the back getting all of the orders out.
“Hi, welcome to Auntie Anne’s. How can I help you today?”
“Can I get one original pretzel, one cinnamon sugar pretzel, and a pretzel dog combo with a lemonade and cheese,” Glancing behind me, I sighed. “Throw in a pizza pretzel, two orders of pretzel nuggets, and whatever else the family behind me wants.”
She smiled, blue eyes twinkling prettily in the bright lights. Turning around I waved the mother over and told her to get something for her and her mother. She put up a small fight, but eventually gave in when she realized I had already put our orders together.
“Thank you so much,” I thought she might burst into tears when my card was approved. “You really didn’t need to do that.”
I shrugged, “It was nothing. Have a nice vacation.”
Walking to the pickup area, my order was already waiting for me. With nothing more than a simple wave, I left the dysfunctional family behind. The grandmother’s loud thank you seemed to echo off of the airport walls, but it was a little less grating now that I knew I would never hear it again.
Andy threw herself at me when I finally made it outside, little Dani wrapping her arms around my legs with squeals of delight louder than her mother’s. Taking her pretzel, Andy gave me a fat, wet kiss on the cheek and told Dani she could eat in the car.
“How’s gymnastics, girlie?” I asked the little girl once we were in the car. “Still kicking ass?”
“No,” She laughed. “I quit, like, forever ago. Appa put me in ballet classes.”
I gave Andy a look. The red head rolled her eyes, fixing me with a knowing look. I had been telling Jin to put her in dance for years.
“It’s been two weeks and she’s already trying to talk him into figure skating.”
“You’re a little hustler, huh?” I reached into the back, squeezing her knee. Dani giggled, angling her body away from mine. She was very ticklish. “Keep at it. You know your dad’s a sucker.”
Dani laughed, “My vovó says the same thing.”
We listened to Olivia Rodrigo on our way to the Kim house. Hoseok and Matilda had planned a huge coming back party for me, and from what it sounded like, I was going to meet Tilly’s new boyfriend.
“Anything I need to know about Max?” I asked.
Andy was almost as in the dark about the guy as I was but was able to tell me he was a tattoo artist from California. The two of them met at Frank’s bookstore and by the end of their conversation Max had managed to get her out to dinner and in his bed. It was a whirlwind romance, one that made me feel uneasy about its foundation, but I was still obligated to be happy for my friend. They could be soulmates for all I knew, and I was not about to judge anybody else for their version of a first date.
“I don’t want to talk about tattoo guy anymore,” Andy whined playfully, turning up the radio when “Good 4 U” came on. “I need to know more about your little boyfriend.”
I groaned, “He’s not my boyfriend.”
This was why I was so adamant Jimin stayed away. We had yet to have a real talk about what we were, choosing to wait for our first date to iron out those details, but no one in my circle seemed to understand. All they heard was the word date and suddenly wedding bells started going off.
“Stop deflecting. We both know he’s your boyfriend, official or not,” She laughed, stealing looks at her daughter in the rearview. “What’s he like?”
It was a hard question to answer. On the one hand, I felt like I knew him better than anybody else, but I was self aware enough to know I didn’t. His body language, the way he looked when he beat his best time, and all of his preferred gear were seared into my mind. The movies he liked, his favorite albums, and all of the best tv shows ever made. He went to college. He was the sweetest, kindest, most understanding person I had ever met, and yet… he still felt far away. The shadows that oftentimes clouded his vision were still a mystery to me, and when he came into practice with a lost look on his face, I felt helpless. I knew him and yet I didn’t.
“He’s quiet,” I finally landed on. “Very nice. Always willing to help other people out if he can. You’d like him.”
Andrea scoffed, “That’s it? The first guy you’ve dated in years and all you can tell me is I’d like him?”
“We’re still getting to know each other,” I sighed. “What do you want to know?”
We spent the rest of the car ride going over the last two months' worth of pining. I told her about Fiona, Jimin’s family, and all of my new friends. She almost pissed herself laughing when I told her about the night he asked me out, making so many Hoseok and Tilly jokes I had a difficult time focusing on the story. Andrea seemed to be finished with her interrogation when we pulled up at her house.
Dani ran to the front door, her excitement about the party making any discomfort I had disappear. It was hard to feel uncomfortable with her around. Taking my hand in hers, the little girl shifted her weight from foot to foot, shouting at her mom to hurry up, and opening the front door anyway. Andy told her to calm down, and I just chuckled and went along with it.
The living room was filled with all of my favorite people, a large ‘welcome home’ sign hanging on the large, backwall. Underneath it was a huge table covered in food, a cake in the middle of it, and I had a feeling Sarah made it. Both her and Frank were the first people to notice me, their faces lighting up, and I let go of Dani’s hand in favor of embracing the elderly couple. The rest of the party comers erupted their voices loud and filled with love as they took turns passing me around.
“Missed you, Otter,” Hoseok murmured in the crook of my neck, hands secured around my waist.
“Missed you more,” I replied, releasing him and catching Tilly. “Jeez, girl. Trying to kill me?”
“Come meet Max,” She replied, dragging me away from Hoseok.
Max was a tall, lanky guy with black hair that fell down his back. His clothes were on the baggier side, all black, and I recognized the band on his t-shirt from the shit Matilda liked to listen to in the car. He smiled at me, and I was surprised to see him rocking adult braces. He introduced himself, his voice deep and warm, and shook my hand. They were baby soft and covered in tattoos.
“It’s great to see you,” I replied, genuinely meaning it. If I had to picture a guy more perfect for Tilly, I would come up empty handed. “Thanks for coming.”
He flushed, impossibly pale skin turning a bright shade of red reminding me of Jimin.
“Anything for Mattie,” He replied.
Huh, he had his own nickname for her and everything. I would need to hang out with Max more before I could say if I liked him or not, but so far, I had a good feeling. Andrea’s worries seemed a bit silly now. They really liked each other, and Tilly’s heartbreaking, dimpled smile made me feel more confident in her partner. They would be just fine.
The party was fun, and I ate more spinach and artichoke dip than was healthy. Hoseok and I talked about my afterschool visit tomorrow. The boys had a swim meet Saturday and the two of us were hoping we could tag team in order to iron out any issues they had been having. I was being placed in charge of the freshmen while Hoseok made sure the other kids were feeling confident and ready for the meet.
"Let's party!" Frank boomed, lifting a beer into the air.
I laughed, "Be careful, old timer. Don't want you to hurt yourself."
I thought of Jimin again. That sounded like something he would say. Surrounded by the people I loved, I laughed hard and partied harder. The plates of food came one right after the other, and I was happy that I still had a place here. Falling back into my step, I fit seamlessly back into the fold.
"Dance with me," Hoseok demanded, tipsy and red-faced.
"It's your toes," I replied, taking his head and letting him take the lead.
The other couples were already dancing and hooped and hollered as I awkwardly followed the steps. I was not always a bad dancer but lost some of my rhythm in the accident. Hoseok never minded and let me step on his feet without a single complaint.
"You look happy," He commented, spinning me around.
I smiled, "I am."
He smiled back, wincing when I stomped down on his toes again. I apologized, but he just held my hand a little tighter and kept moving. I hummed along to the song, filled with joy. He spun me again, and finally let me go when I slammed into Jin.
"Go get some cake or something," He laughed. "You're too dangerous to be out here."
I rolled my eyes, "I tried to tell you. It's your fault you don't listen."
"Don't need you anyway. I have enough swag for the both of us."
I watched, thoroughly amused from the sidelines, as he moon-walked around the living room.
I left just before midnight after staying behind to help Andy and Jin clean up. The others left a few hours before to get back to Denver at a decent time. My house looked the same as always, dark and empty, but I could tell the landscapers had been around. The grass was recently cut and edged.
The silence inside was deafening. I had always known my place was too big for one person, but after spending so much time in my little she-shed at the Andersons’ house, everything here just felt excessive. Tossing my keys in the bowl beside the door, I wiped my eyes and decided to just head to bed. I would only be here for three days. I would be back in Saline before I knew it.
Dragging my body upstairs, this sudden depression-filled fatigue made my shoulders feel ten times heavier. A chilling, almost insidious, hollowness began to spread across my body. I knew this feeling all too well and it made me feel pathetic. Could I not be on my own anymore? Had I really grown that attached to my life in Michigan? Finally getting into my bedroom, I realized that I had.
Saline was perfect. Living in Colorado Springs has always bothered me. The people here held more traditional values and making friends was difficult. I had Andy and Jin, but they were both very busy people. Andrea was a full-time nurse, Jin’s schedule was somehow even more erratic than his wife’s, and when they were off, they wanted to spend time with Dani. I was lucky if I saw them once every two weeks.
Hoseok, Tilly, and Minho all lived in Denver, and while I saw them more often due to the meetings with Frank and Sarah dragging me into the city, it was not like we hung out every time I was out there. Days would go by with me speaking at all, and most of my weekends were spent in bed sleeping. Working at the school helped, but I would never claim anyone from the swim team to be a friend. I was not in the habit of befriending children.
Living in Saline was different. Jimin was always there to make me laugh, and when he wasn’t, I had people like Taehyung and Sam to keep me company. Giselle was young, but we got along so well I often forgot about the difference in age between the two of us. Megan and Yoongi were Michigan’s own version of Andy and Jin, and I could see myself becoming good friends with them given enough time. No one had kids, no one was too busy trying to keep up with crazy expenses, and I could find a little house away from the rest of the world to spend my life in.
I thought of the Parks, a family who I had come to love more than I thought was possible, and the Andersons who took me in and always tried to make me feel comfortable. Eloise and her kindness. Luna and Cameron. All of them. I loved and adored every single one of them, and it was then that I finally let myself really think about what I wanted.
Did I want to come back here after I was finished with the season? Did I really want this massive house if it meant I had no one to share it with? No, I decided. Stripping out of my clothes, the numbness was being replaced with a different strange feeling. It felt suspiciously like hope. Excitement came to me so rarely it was foreign and odd, but nice all the same. Jittery, I took my phone out of my pants pocket.
“Hello?” Jimin’s voice was scratchy when he finally picked up.
“Sorry,” I muttered. “Did I wake you up?”
“Yes, but it’s okay,” I could hear him shuffling around in his bed. “Did you have fun?”
“Yeah,” I breathed, climbing into bed. Then, without thinking, I blurted, “I think I want to move to Michigan.”
I held my breath as I waited for his response. There was no telling how this conversation would go, but I was hopeful. Even if this whole date thing did not go very well, I was positive that we would be able to move past it with a little bit of time. We worked well together and if he was comfortable with it then we could continue working together. Regardless, there was always coaching at a school.
“Like, permanently?”
I nodded but after a moment of silence remembered he could not see me.
“Yeah.”
My stomach started to churn. As the silence on the other end began to stretch, the excitement I felt before faded. Even if I said Jimin and I could get past a potentially awkward break up of sorts, I would not pretend that the thought did not make me physically ill. We would never be the same if that happened. It would be something to think about if it came to pass before the Olympics was over.
“Did something happen?” He finally asked, and I could hear the genuine worry in his tone. “Are you okay?”
The fear shifted to hurt, irritation, and anger, making my eyebrows knit together.
“I’m fine,” I could not keep the bite from my voice. It was petty and wrong of me, but his insinuation that I was not in my right mind was insulting. It made me feel like a child. “Just- forget I said anything. I don’t know what I’m even talking about.”
“Don’t do that,” His steady calmness made me even angrier. “I’m only asking you because it came out of the blue, not because I’m not happy with the idea.”
Now I just felt silly. Here I was making these small revelations, waking him up from his sleep, and then getting snippy because he did not respond the way I had wanted him to. Ugh, I wasn’t even his girlfriend yet and I’m acting like Darcy. A shiver went down my spine. That was an insult above all others.
“I’m sorry,” I murmured, the attitude from a few seconds before gone as quickly as it came. “I got defensive for no reason. Sorry.”
He chuckled, the sound barely audible over the phone.
“I forgive you. Now, why do you want to pack your life up for good?”
That made me laugh. It was a sad, pitiful sound. One that did not hold my usual spunk. One I don’t think Jimin had ever heard before. It was impossible to feel sad when he was around.
“I forgot how quiet my house is,” I admitted softly. “I love my friends, but I think coming back just reminded me of how easily I was able to fall back into the routine of it all. Jin and Andy are parents, Tilly has a new boyfriend, and Hoseok and Minho are always so busy with their own lives that I don’t see any of them as often as I would like to.”
Turning on my side, I blinked back a few tears.
“It might sound stupid, but I really do love Saline. I like how busy I am and all of my friends. I bought this place with the hopes of kids and a dog one day, but I don’t think that’ll ever happen, and now it’s just rooms collecting dust. I just-” I let a tear fall, my emotions starting to bubble over. “I don’t like how lonely it feels out here.”
“Doesn’t sound like you like it there. Have you always felt like this?” He asked.
I shook my head, the tears free falling in between sniffles and shaky breaths.
“Not always. Ever since Namjoon died things have been weird. There was a point when I felt suffocated because no one would leave me alone, and then one day everything resumed, and I just got left behind. It was like I woke up and two years just passed me by.”
Jimin comforted me while I cried, telling me how much he hated to hear me so upset, while I worked on calming down. There had been a time in my life when I was not so emotional, but therapy had opened up a whole new side of myself I didn't know existed. Rubbing my face, I sniffled and sank deeper into my mattress. For now, the waterworks had stopped.
“You were recovering,” He soothed. “Your body needed time to heal, and you were traumatized. I don’t think anyone can blame you for zoning out for a bit.”
I hummed, “I know. Doesn’t make it easier to swallow.”
“I know how you feel. When I pulled out of the Olympics last time there was a part of me that felt like a huge failure, but my dad was there to help get my head back on straight. He doesn’t seem like it, but he’s a really great shoulder to cry on.”
“That doesn’t surprise me,” My voice was like sandpaper. “James is the sweetest person I’ve ever met.”
I felt heavy. Worn. Used. My eyes begged for me to shut them, but we were just getting back into safer waters, and I didn’t want to burst the bubble. I yawned, covering my mouth and hoping Jimin could not hear the sound. He had gone quiet.
“Can I ask you something?” Jimin’s voice broke through the comfortable silence that had formed around us. “You don’t have to say anything.”
“Shoot,” I forced myself to smile.
“What happened to Namjoon?”
I closed my eyes. This was something I knew would come up sooner or later. My lip wobbled uncontrollably as the second wave of tears crashed over me. I hated talking about this, but I knew it was going to come up sooner or later. Jimin deserved the truth, and honestly, I wanted to tell him. Being vulnerable with someone felt good. Being vulnerable with Jimin was divine. He was always so ready and willing to go along with things, listening and watching my every move, and trying his best to understand me. It was refreshing. It was nice. It was familiar.
“Was he in the accident with you?” He asked and his voice was so, so gentle.
“Yeah,” I croaked, finally finding my voice. “I went out with some of my friends and got pretty drunk. I was tired and ready to go home, but my ride didn’t want to go home yet. So, I called Joon.”
I sucked in a deep, loud breath. Jimin told me I could stop, that I didn’t owe him anything, but I ignored him. This wasn’t about owing him. This was about letting the guy I liked get to know me. This story was a part of who I was, as fucked up as that may sound, and I wanted him to get to know this facet of my life as deeply as he knew the present day one.
“Anyway,” I continued. “He offered to come and pick me up. Twenty minutes later I’m getting into his car and we’re on our way home. We’d just gotten engaged and bought our first house together- things were perfect. I had never been happier.
“We ended up taking the long way home because of an accident on the interstate. It was my idea, and Namjoon had a knack for going along with whatever I wanted. We were only two minutes away from the house when we got hit.”
I took a few deep breaths and wiped my face. Jimin was quiet on the other end. After a minute or two, I jumped back into the story.
“There was a four-way intersection around the corner from our place. Our light was green when we drove up. I don't think he thought to check if there was another car coming. He never even saw the truck. He, uh, died on impact.”
“Jesus,” Jimin breathed.
“The other guy was drunk as hell behind the wheel. Not paying attention. Funny thing is, he was the only person who didn’t get critically injured. Just a broken arm and a concussion. He wrapped our car around a light pole. My leg was pinned between the car and the light, and the airbag is what caused the brain injury.”
Jimin cursed under his breath, “I’m so sorry. I’m so, so sorry that happened to you.”
“Yeah,” I gritted out. “Me too.”
He let me cry for a little while, saying over and over again how sorry he was and how he wished he was in Colorado with me. I did not have anything to say to him. It felt like my chest had been ripped open and my heart was on full display.
I never questioned how quickly we went from barely talking, to joking around, to sitting up late at night on the phone talking about life. It just happened. Clutching my phone in my hand, I let out a deep breath and held back any more tears from falling. I never said it, but I wished he was here, too.
“Hey,” His voice was gentle when he spoke, so fragile and sweet, that I had to force down the sobs threatening to come out. “I just want to say I’m sorry for how I reacted earlier. You wanting to move here is probably the best thing I’ve heard all fucking year, but I just didn’t want to sway your decision.”
Sniffling, I tried to tell him I wasn’t upset, but he shut me down almost immediately.
“Let me finish,” His voice did not leave room for argument. “I know I don’t act like I’m insecure, but I am. I can be selfish and self-centered, and I’ve always had to really work on those parts of myself.”
“I don’t understand what that has to do with anything,” I mumbled, curling into a ball beneath my blankets.
“Like I said, I can be a very selfish person,” He sighed. “There was this part of my brain just wanting to hear you say you were coming here and staying with me for forever. I didn’t want that to take over the narrative. And- no offense, but if you did move all the way out here just to date me, I think I’d be a little creeped out honestly.”
I snorted. Hearing that he felt the need to explain any of that to me felt like a small win, even if it did make an alarm go off in my head. It took courage to be that open and honest with another person, especially someone who just cried their eyes out. His compassion and understanding never failed to amaze me, and I was grateful he trusted me enough to let me into his mind for once. Still, it did not make the creep comment any less funny.
“Don’t laugh,” He whined, unable to stop himself from chuckling. “I’m being serious.”
“So do you want me to be a creepy stalker or not?” I joked, hoping to lighten up the mood. “Make up your mind, kid.”
“I think I just want you to be yourself,” I melted. “That’s been working out just fine so far. I mean, if you are a creepy stalker, you managed to get me to like you.”
“Mission accomplished,” I breathed, still reeling from his sweet words. “You better watch out, 007. There’s a new spy in town.”
“So, I’m Bond and you’re Joe Goldburg?”
“Exactly,” My cheeks hurt from how much I was smiling. “Penn Badgley would be a decent James Bond. He was really great in Margin Call.”
I bit my lip, trying to suppress my smile.
“Holy shit, you actually watched it?”
Margin Call was one of Jimin's favorite movies from 2011. He kept a very large notebook filled with all of the movies he’s ever seen, along with ratings, and if he should ever watch them again. He went through it one day and came across the action film, rewatched it, and then spent most of the day talking my ear off about how great it is.
“Someone I know was very passionate about it, and it managed to pique my curiosity.”
Jimin sighed, but I could not tell what emotion was behind it. Definitely was not anger or frustration. Not sadness either.
“What time are you getting back on Sunday?” He asked, and I could definitely hear the affectionate tone his voice had taken on.
“Um,” I thought about it for a moment. “Six, I think.”
“PM?”
“Yeah,” I curled up under my blankets. It was beginning to get really cold inside, but I did not want to get up to turn the heat on. “I have to double check my flight times, but I know it’s somewhere around there. Why? What’s up?”
“I know we already made plans for next week, but I was thinking I could pick you up from the airport and we could go out.”
My face grew hot, “I don’t think I’ll be dressed for a date.”
“You always look great,” He assured me.
I laughed, nervous and embarrassed, “Thanks.”
We had originally planned our first date to be the weekend after I got back. Jimin was adamant about giving me an experience, and I had been more than happy to indulge him a little. He was just so cute when he got excited. We were running on a limited timeline right now, though, since he had an upcoming swimming fundraiser with Swim Across America in Allendale. The team was raising money for cancer research, and I was very excited to be there to show my support.
Moving the date up meant we would have less to do next weekend, unless Jimin still wanted to keep our plans in place, but it meant we could focus on the fundraiser instead of trying to juggle a date at the same time.
“I hate to go, but I’m really tired,” Jimin yawned. Pulling my phone away from my ear I was startled by how late it was. “I’ll text you in the morning, okay?”
I apologized for keeping him up so late. “Promise I won’t do it again.”
He hummed, already beginning to fall asleep, “Don’t mind. You’re always welcome to bother me in the middle of the night.”
“Night Jimin,” I whispered, blood pumping.
“Night bug.”
There was one thing I missed about Colorado- how quickly the snow melted. Michigan was seeing more snow as each day went by, but here in the mountains they would not start seeing the worst of it until the spring. For the first time in a month, I was able to forgo my large, puffy jacket in favor of a long sleeve and jeans. Jimin found my excitement over this endearing, sending a slew of heart-eye emojis in response to the mirror photo I sent him.
It was almost the end of the day when I pulled into the high school parking lot. The entire front office erupted in excitement when I walked through the front doors, hugs and well wishes overwhelming me. Sandra, the receptionist, could have talked all day if I let her, and after signing in, I politely told them all I needed to meet up with Coach Jung. I lied about stopping by on my way out and only felt a little bad about it. They were way too much for me.
“They’re going to be so excited to see you,” Hoseok mumbled, a smile stretching across his face as loud teenage boys got closer and closer to the pool house.
“I’m happy to see them, too,” I replied. “Should we wait until they change to make the grand reveal?”
He shook his head. “Would you rather hug now or when they’re in speedos.”
I shivered, disgusted by the mental image.
“Thanks for putting that in my head, you sick fuck.”
Choking on his spit, Hoseok bent over, laughing so hard he started to screech. His laughter reminded me of a ghost's wail and was contagious. We were both so wrapped up in our little bubble we did not notice the doors opening.
“Coach?”
Wiping my cheeks, I caught my breath and made eye contact with Jordan. Baby blue eyes widened while a large, dimple smile overtook his face. Behind him, Gabriel announced that I was here, and the room was filled with excitement. I was not much of a hugger, but I was happy to greet each boy with one. Gabriel hadn’t stopped speaking since catching sight of me and had a few accidental slip ups about how much he disliked Coach Jung.
Hoseok had alluded to that being their main issue right now. The boys were having a hard time adjusting to a new face and missed me dearly. To his credit, Hoseok admitted that he was still getting used to the coaching thing and made a couple mistakes his first few days here. He had made it a point to apologize to them for being a dick, but the teens hadn’t forgotten or forgiven him for his snappy attitude. Especially the two oldest.
“When are you coming back?” Marcus asked.
I smiled sadly, “I’ll be out for the rest of the year.” The tall boy deflated, sending a nasty look Hoseok’s way. “But,” I was quick to fix my mistake, “I’m planning on making trips to assist Coach Jung throughout the year. I wanted to be here for your last meet, but something came up.”
That something had been Jimin’s birthday, and I was not going to risk missing his party.
Regardless, Marcus and the team were very happy to hear they would be seeing me.
“I promise I’ll be here for graduation, too,” I added.
Gabriel offered to give me one of his tickets and I gratefully accepted the extended offer. We stood there and talked for at least fifteen minutes before I finally told them to get changed and into the water. Without protest, all twelve of them went to the locker room.
“You know,” Hoseok chuckled. “You're going to have to teach me how you manage to do that.”
“Cinnamon buns from Mountain Shadows,” I put on my whistle and grabbed my clipboard from my duffel bag. “They’ll be eating out of your hand in no time.”
The team was glowing. Jordan stood in the middle of the boys, a large smile on his face, as he praised them for giving the meet their best effort. Having another win under their belt, all of them were buzzing with excitement at a chance at nationals. They only needed to win three more competitions to qualify.
For the first time since I arrived, the icy contempt they held for Hoseok seemed to thaw. It brought a smile to my face. If I did not come back next year, I had a feeling the boys would be getting along much better.
“What’s for dinner?” Marcus asked, looking at me for an answer.
“Coach said something about burgers,” I replied, gesturing towards Hoseok. “You should ask him though. I could be wrong.”
Gabriel chimed in, “Yeah, we’re going to Bingo.”
My mouth watered. Bingo Burger was one of the best spots in town. Their fries were hot and crispy, and I loved their shakes. Mulling over my options for dinner, I always found myself stuck between the Gone Shroomin’ Burger and the Happy Hippie. For a vegan burger, that thing was really fucking good. Then again, a thick, juicy beef patty smothered in bacon, cheese, and mushrooms would hit the spot. Indecisive and bored, I fiddled around with my phone and somehow ended up texting Jimin.
Me: Gone Shroomin’ or Happy Hippie?
The noise on the bus was just in the background now and easy to tune out. Hoseok was laughing loudly with the freshmen while the two seniors were in a quiet conversation in the seat in front of me. Marcus and his girlfriend broke up recently. I stopped paying attention once my phone vibrated.
Jimin: No idea what that means
Jimin: Gone Shroomin I guess
I bit my lip, suppressing a smile.
Me: We’re going for celebration burgers
Me: The boys won and Hobi is treating them since we’re out in Pueblo and not getting back to the Springs until after dinner.
Jimin: Speaking of food… I was thinking we could get some BBQ on Sunday
“Y/N!” Hoseok called, making me look up from my phone. “Tell your boyfriend you’ll call him later.”
“We need you to be the tiebreaker,” Twig chirped.
“What for?” I sighed, glancing down at my screen.
Jimin: Have you been to Union Rec yet? It’s BBQ and a taqueria
Me: No but I’m always down for a burrito
“Do mermaids have gills?” Twig asked.
Fully pulled out of my phone, I flipped it around and gave the boys my undivided attention.
“Of course not. They’re mammals, so it would be a blowhole.”
Hoseok clapped his hands, “Thank you! That’s exactly what I said.”
Sliding further down in the booth, I closed my eyes and drowned them out again. Colorado’s air was so dry and crisp I was having to get used to the altitude change. I missed how wet and cold Michigan was. Smiling to myself, I remembered how much I hated it when I first landed. So much has changed…
Shuffling, I made myself more comfortable. We were only thirty minutes out from the Springs now, and we would be at Bingos right on time for Hoseok’s reservations. Feeling myself growing tired, I sunk even further into the booth. Eyes heavy, I let them slip closed, and slept for the rest of the bus ride.
Standing in front of my bathroom mirror, I smoothed down my skirt for the millionth time. The gray sweater I had thrown on seemed too casual now that I was looking at myself, but I did not know what else to do. It was a laundry day, but when I went to put my clothes in the dryer it refused to turn on. Violet said they needed a new one anyway, but that did little to improve my mood. The pretty red dress I wanted to wear was soaking wet and hanging from the shower rod to dry. I played with the skin on my lip, willing the black and gray outfit to somehow look nicer. On the other side of the phone, Andy sighed.
“You look fine,” She insisted, running her hand through her auburn hair. “Do a cute hairstyle and put on a nice pair of earrings, and you’ll be golden.”
“You don’t think it’s too plain?” I had asked her this five times now, and each time I got that same reply. “I mean, do I look like I’m going to a funeral?”
“The guy has seen you in sweats and no makeup and still wanted to take you out. Do you honestly think he cares about the color of your outfit?”
She had a point. Finally deciding to cave in and give up on my obsession, I took her advice to do something with my hair. A few of the strands were beginning to look silver, and my sideburns were looking paler every day, but after Hoseok told me he was starting to see a few grays, I decided to leave them be. If we were both going to be silver foxes, I liked the idea of doing it together.
“Are you wearing heels?”
“No,” I shook my head. I picked my phone up and went to my bedroom to find a pair of earrings. “It’s too icy. Silver or gold?”
She thought about it for a second, her face scrunched up cutely.
“Silver.”
I landed on some thick, gun-metal hoops. They matched the color of the sweater perfectly and did not take away from my face too much. I had spent too much time on looking this nice to have an accessory dominate. Andy was happy with my choice.
I had gotten back a little earlier than I originally thought I would, and asked Jimin if it was okay that I meant him at the restaurant out here instead of making him drive all the way to Detroit to pick me up. He had put up a bit of a fight about it but relented when I said I was hoping we could hang out at his house after dinner. I said I wanted to get myself home, but I was really trying to see how bad the drive was from his place to mine. The thought of spending more time in his space made me feel like a teenage girl.
“How’s ballet going?” I slipped on a pair of black tights. It was freezing outside, and I wanted to have as many layers on as possible. “Has Dani made any progress in getting her figure skating career started?”
Andrea laughed but said that her daughter was getting closer to her goal every day. Jin was weak and did anything the little girl wanted if he could. This was the only issue they were both bull-headed about. Jin wanted to teach her to be responsible and follow through on things, and Dani was tired of preparing for figure skating. She wanted to be on the ice and her dad was afraid of pushing her too far too young. I was most definitely a team Dani instigator, and it was a point of contention between Seokjin and I.
“What did you think of Max?”
I smiled. That boy was definitely a character. The gang and I had a nice dinner before I left Colorado, and Tilly brought along Mr. Tattoo guy. He was quiet and when he did talk, he always had something completely random and out of the blue to say. He fascinated me and when everyone started huddling in their own groups to chat, I turned most of my attention to the new guy.
He was a sweetheart, and it was a nice change of pace getting to know him. He hated being called Peter (his first name), went to college for nuclear engineering, and became a tattoo artist on a whim. A buddy of his wanted a new piece, paid Max to draw it, and trusted the guy with a tattoo gun. He was an apprentice in San Francisco for three years before moving to Denver to open up his own shop. For all of his eccentricity, he was very successful and down to Earth.
“He’s good for her,” I finally replied, zipping up my Doc Martens, I checked the time. I would have to leave soon. “I’m just happy there’s no drama between her and Hobi.”
It had been a year since they officially broke up, but I knew they fell into bed with one another a handful of times since then. Hoseok and I had talked about their weird relationship on one too many drunken nights, the swimmer the only person able I liked enough to force a glass of whiskey down. Tilly knew that I knew and would vent to me sometimes. They loved each other, knew one another better than anybody else, and it was easy to fall back into each other since we were in the same circle.
I doubted Andy knew anything about that, we tried our best to keep her out of the loop, but she always said that they still had lingering feelings. I hoped Hoseok was handling this news well. He seemed fine, happy even, so I just rolled with it. If he had a problem, I was sure I would have heard about it by now.
“Speaking of Hoseok,” The humorous tone in Andy’s voice caught my full attention. “Apparently, Jin saw him at The Rabbit Hole with some blonde girl before you got into town. He just remembered to tell me last night.”
This was news to me. Wracking my brain, I tried to figure out if he had brought up a date, or even a person he might be interested in, but nothing came up. Shrugging, I let it go. It was probably just some girl he picked up at the bar. Still, that would be an expensive date.
“He hasn’t told me anything about that,” I murmured.
“Might be why he’s not bothered by new boyfriend.”
I laughed, “Or it could be that they’ve moved on.”
“Oh, please,” She pulled a face, eyes rolling to the back of her head. “We all know that’s not true. At least, not until recently.”
“Regardless,” I sighed, grabbing my purse and walking out of the front door. “It’s none of our business. If they’re happy that’s all that matters.”
Andy raspberried, “Boo. I hate it when you’re all mature and adult-like.”
“And right,” I joked. “Don’t forget about that part.”
Locking up my little house, I made my way through the Anderson’s. Violet was watching the Golden Girls on the couch while Calvin was reading a book beside her. It was a sweet scene that made me smile. I wanted what they had.
I gave them a smile and wave as I passed by. Violet returned it in full, her eyes kind and gentle, before going back to her show. Calvin put his book down and asked what time I was planning on coming back. He wanted to keep an eye out for my car.
“Around midnight,” I replied, moving my phone away from my mouth. Andrea was rambling about the new doctor on staff. I trusted her disdain enough to know he was a huge dick. “See you two tomorrow.”
“Be safe out there,” He replied, going back to his copy of The Catcher and the Rye.
Andy and I were on the phone for the entire car ride into Ann Arbor. I enjoyed hearing her voice, the small distraction welcome when I felt my anxiety spike. Thankfully it was a Sunday night, and the streets were somewhat empty.
Once I got into the downtown area, I drowned out her voice completely. Andrea never minded. She just kept talking like I hadn’t stepped out of whatever conversation we were just having. Never got mad when I kept asking her to repeat herself either. She was a wonderful friend to me, and I was grateful to have her in my life. If I moved to Saline, she would be the person I missed the most.
I still hadn’t talked to anyone else about the possibility of moving. I was not sure how they would react, and I needed to have my mind made up before giving any of them the news. While I knew Andy and Jin would be supportive, and Tilly and Minho wouldn’t really care all that much (it just gave them an excuse to vacation in Michigan), it was Hoseok I was most on the fence about.
With him it could go either way. He would either be really happy and supportive or call me crazy. It came from a place of love, and I respected his opinion more than any of the others, so I had to be completely sure of myself before getting into something like that with him. If he thought for a second I was rushing into things he would go into overprotective, big brother mode and kill all of my excitement. He might even be able to change my mind if he fought hard enough.
Pulling up to the restaurant, I was impressed by the sheer size of it. One half looked like an old warehouse while the other half was a small, white bricked building. A red neon sign glowed in the night and a large party was hanging out outside of the building. I could see Jimin in their little group and smiled. He was a very popular man in this area and was able to make new friends wherever he went. If I had to guess, he knew someone and is now best friends with all of them.
“Hey, I just got to the restaurant. I’m going to let you go.”
“Okay, baby,” Andy replied. “Have fun. Talk to you later.”
“Text you when I get home,” I replied.
Andy was as hypervigilant about getting texts as I was. She was on staff at the hospital when Namjoon and I first arrived. I can’t remember anything from that night after getting in Joon’s car, but when Jin and I spoke about it he said Andy was one of the nurses having to help triage me. She had to be physically pulled away from my body once the doctors found out about our connection, but the image of my body that night is burned into her mind. She was the person who took care of me the most upon release and quit her job at the hospital for a little while in order to make sure I was well taken care of. Calls and texts were just our thing now and I always felt horrible for being part of such a traumatic event for her.
“Love you,” She said.
“Love you too,” I replied, hanging up.
Getting out of my car, I locked the doors and made my way over to Jimin. He caught sight of me before I reached the small group and broke out into a huge, heart stopping smile. Unable to stop myself, I smiled back and waved awkwardly. He said something to the group before meeting me halfway.
“Hey, you,” He said, wrapping his arms around me. “You look really pretty.”
I laughed nervously, squeezing his waist. “Thanks. I tried my best.”
Pulling away, I was able to admire him a bit better. He was wearing light jeans tonight, a rarity as he preferred sweatpants and slacks, and a black t-shirt. A leather jacket was a staple in his wardrobe, and he always said they kept him warm enough. I never believed him. As always, everything was a tight fit and showed off his body perfectly.
“You don’t look too bad yourself,” I said once my appraisal was finished. “Nice boots. Where’d you get them?”
He looked down at the black, Chelsea boots and shrugged, “Nordstrom, I think. Taehyung got them for me a few Christmases ago.”
Of course he did.
“Let’s go inside. I’m cold.”
Jimin laughed, “My apologies, ma’am.”
The restaurant was packed, but Jimin had arrived thirty minutes early to get us on their waitlist, so I only had to wait five minutes for our table to be ready. Jimin brushed off the gesture as first date etiquette, but I knew better. The kid was late to everything and yet he got here early so I wouldn’t have to stand outside in the cold. It almost made me reach out and hold his hand, but my nerves got the best of me. We were at our table before I could gather up some courage, leaving a disappointed, bitter taste in my mouth.
“I’m feeling Disco Fries as an app. You?”
Searching the menu for them, I nodded. “That sounds really good.”
We were quiet for a few minutes as we decided on what we wanted. The menu here was rather large, filled with Mexican foods and copious BBQ items. Having never been here before I had no clue what was good and what hasn’t, but from how many people were here I had to assume nothing was bad.
“Know what you want?” Jimin asked, breaking the silence.
I shook my head, “No idea. What about you?”
“I get the same thing every time I come,” He laughed. “The Korean BBQ Burger is really fucking good. I also like the enchiladas.”
Finding both items, my mouth watered. Everything sounded amazing, but I wanted to get a little out of my comfort zone. I just had burgers yesterday, so I was not feeling that. Maybe BBQ? Looking at the options, I shook my head. I could not eat a half pound of anything. Biting the dry skin on my lips, my brain felt like it was working on overdrive. Too many options.
“Welcome to Union Rec,” I jumped a little, startled. “I’m Annie and I’ll be your server tonight.”
My eyes locked with a pair of baby blues, and I immediately recognized her. She was the brunette from the bar a couple of months ago. Eyes sliding from me, she landed on Jimin and the bored expression on her face morphed into one of pure bliss. I did not understand why she had given me that nasty look back then, but it was much clearer to me now. She had a thing for Jimin. Remembering she had a boyfriend, one she screamed at over the phone, it made me feel nauseous. Poor Tom.
“Oh my gosh, Christian. What are you doing here?” She asked, sneaking a look at me.
“Got a hot date,” He replied cheekily, gesturing his hand my way. “You remember Y/N, right?”
She gave me one of those tight-lipped, fake smiles. I returned the favor. I was not really jealous per say, Jimin’s declaration making any possibility of that disappear, but I did not appreciate anyone trying to make me feel small. I was a gold medalist. I was a fucking Olympian. Whoever the hell this chick thought she was, I would make sure she never thought for a second she got under my skin.
“Yeah, we met at Brecon’s,” Annie replied, completely ignoring me. “Thought she was your coach.”
Jimin either did not catch the insult or he was choosing to ignore it. His smile was still just as pleasant as it was when we first sat down. I envied his ability to keep his emotions so controlled. I knew I must have been glaring at the poor girl.
“She is,” He shrugged. “Doesn’t mean she’s not my girlfriend. Are you taking our order or…?”
Annie spluttered for a second before regaining her composure. All affection in her eyes was gone and replaced by irritation. It was definitely directed at me, but Jimin’s dismissal must have stung. I was happy to be rid of her. Putting in our order for Disco fries, Jimin got a Sprite and Annie left before I could ask for a drink. Sipping on my complimentary water, I forced myself to breathe in and out. She was just a petty, annoyed girl with a crush. That was all. So, what if she was being rude? I was fine. Everything was fine. After the fifth sip, I actually believed it.
Trying to keep my tongue in check, I went back to looking through the menu. Finally able to make a choice, I decided on the birria beef ramen and closed the menu. Hopefully little miss Annie wouldn’t spit in it. Hot again, I took another long sip of water.
“Excuse me.”
Jimin flagged down another waiter, a pleasant smile on his face. Confused, I put down the glass and raised an eyebrow. He winked at me before laying the charm on thick.
“Hey Marty. Would you mind if we got a different server?”
The young girl nodded frantically, “Of course. Is everything okay?”
Jimin smiled, eyes like crescents. “Everything is fine. Just Annie on her bullshit. Don’t want to get her fired by talking to your dad.”
Marty rolled her eyes, “Figures. I’ll tell her I’m taking care of you guys. Just don’t expect me to be running around for you, man. I have an entire section by myself.”
“I want privacy anyway,” Jimin replied, smirking at me. “Thanks. I’ll tip you well.”
She laughed, “Just make sure you put it in my hand. That bitch has been stealing tips. Cosette is trying to convince pops to fire her, but you know how he is about the girl.”
Jimin shook his head, “I already know. Can you get my girl a drink? Annie ran off without taking her order.”
Marty looked at me, her deadpan stare making me burst into laughter. Apparently, it wasn’t just me. That helped.
“Sorry about her. She’s a massive bitch. What can I get you?”
I smiled, my mood a million times better, “Iced tea, please.”
“You got it, babe. You ready to order?”
Marty took our orders and promised to be back with my drink soon.
“How do you two know each other?” I asked Jimin, finishing off my water.
“We were in the same class back in high school. Her mom owns that flower shop on Michigan Avenue.”
That was surprising. I was positive the girl was no older than eighteen. She reminded me of a porcelain doll, her chubby cheek and big eyes adding something angelic to her overall look. Then again, Jimin did not look all that old either. It was easy to forget he just turned 24. The age gap was really messing with my brain.
Annie was back with Jimin’s drink a few minutes later. She said nothing when she practically slammed his cup on the table before stalking off. It was then that I knew who she reminded me of. Darcy. I wondered if they were friends. Definitely had the same attitude problem, that was for sure.
“Ignore her,” Jimin told me once she was out of earshot. “I’ve been doing it since middle school.”
The rest of our dinner went back without a hitch. With Annie out of the way, and Marty’s small and infrequent check-in’s, we were able to be in a bubble of sorts. He asked about my trip back home and filled me in on what happened over the weekend. He had finally told his parents about our date and said that his mom thought it was a great idea. James called me perfect a few times, too. I had a hard time believing it, but Jimin had never lied to me before. It was nice to know the people around him accepted me even if I was a few years older.
“My mom’s 9 years older than my dad,” He revealed in between bites of food.
Shocked, I stopped eating all together. I had no idea they were that different in age. Ne-Yeon looked so youthful and pretty it was hard to guess just how old she actually was. Even fighting cancer, that woman did not look a day over 40. James was also in great shape for his age. To hear they had their own age gap made me feel a little bit better.
“Wait,” Something else occurred to me. “Your mom was in her forties when she had you?”
Jimin nodded, “45. She had Haru at 48.”
It made sense to me now. To Jimin, our age gap was nothing special. It was smaller than his parents’, and having an older mother did not bother him at all. In his eyes, we had all of the time in the world for marriage and kids. A small weight came off of my shoulders. It really did not mean anything to him. He was not just saying that to make me feel better either.
“Do you want dessert?” He asked, his plate empty in front of him.
I was almost done with my bowl, “What do they have?”
He squinted his eyes, thinking.
“I know they have this horchata banana pudding. It’s literally the best dessert I’ve ever had in my life. There are a few other things, but I can’t remember what they are.”
I chuckled, “Then we’ll have the banana pudding.”
Jimin was not exaggerating either. The pudding was delicious. I almost wished we had each gotten our own serving, but after seeing the bill we were happy we hadn’t. Jimin paid this time. We had a back-and-forth deal when it came to meals. I got us breakfast last Wednesday, so he was picking up this bill. This was, unfortunately, much higher than Denny’s.
“I’ll put gas in your truck,” I offered on our way out. “To make up for the difference from Denny’s.”
He scoffed, “Don’t worry about it.”
“But-”
“We’re together now,” He interrupted me. “If I want to pay for a meal, then I will. You don’t have to pay me back.”
“We’ve always done that,” I argued.
“That was before,” He countered, walking me to my car door and opening it. “This is now. And right now, I’m trying to take a pretty girl, in a pretty dress, on a nice date. That includes paying for her meal.”
Getting into my seat, I pointed out that I let him do the gentleman thing all of the time. Opening my door for me, pulling chairs out at restaurants, and even walking on the curbside when we were out together. The list was endless. The least I could do was pay for half of a meal.
“I don’t do those things to get on your good side,” Jimin replied. “I do them because I want to. This isn’t transactional. So, stop worrying about being a burden. I enjoy taking care of you. You deserve to be taken care of.”
I could not think of a good enough comeback, so I just decided to drop it. If he wanted to pay for me then he could. It was his money to spend.
“Send me your address.”
“You still want to come over?” He seemed surprised.
“Yeah,” I nodded, already pulling up the GPS. “What is it?”
He sounded like Charlie when he won the golden ticket as he gave me his address.
“Don’t get too excited now,” I joked. “Just because I’m coming over doesn’t mean anything.”
Jimin laughed, “I pretend I don’t even know what sex is until after date three, so don’t worry about it.”
That made me laugh, “Get in your truck. I’ll meet you there.”
Looking back at him, I felt giddy. His eyes were so alight, his joy written so clearly across his face it took my breath away. A happy Jimin was the only kind I wanted to see. Blowing caution to the wind, I finally reached out. Touching his stomach, I felt the muscles clench beneath my fingers.
“Thank you,” I said earnestly.
“What for?” He rasped, placing one hand over mine, pressing my hand further into his skin.
“For-” I broke off, taking my hand away. The feeling of him underneath me was too much. “For being so accommodating. I really appreciate it.”
He laughed, the sound strained and airy. I was too embarrassed by my actions to look at his face, but I could feel his eyes burning into the side of my eyes. Unlike me, Jimin was always brave. Hopefully some of that confidence would rub off on me. Maybe then I could reach out and hold him whenever I wanted to.
“You’re welcome,” He replied, and my thighs clenched together at how rough he sounded. Did touching him do that? Or was it the praise? It could be both. “Drive safe, okay? You can follow me if that helps.”
I nodded, swallowing. The icy air outside did nothing to put out the blistering heat coursing between us right now. It was overwhelming how hot it was. Turning up my A/C, I pointed the vent directly at my face.
“See you in a few minutes,” I breathed, still unable to look at him.
Jimin closed my door, and I leaned back in my seat breathing heavily. I watched him as he rounded the front of my car, those pants sticking to his legs like a second skin and groaned. I had never felt this level of desire for anyone before.
He reminded me so much of Namjoon. His beautiful brain and love for music and poetry so reminiscent it managed to bring me back to happier times. In the beginning I was afraid my attraction to him stemmed from that link. Because he reminded me of something I had loved so dearly that meant what I was beginning to feel was just a projection.
I was wrong. So unbelievably wrong. Jimin had a passion that Joon could never replicate. If Joon was a warm blanket, then Jimin was like the tide in the sea. On the surface it was calm, steady, and beautiful. Underneath that was life like nothing I had ever seen before. He was refreshing and filled with this fire for life that reminded me of my own from years ago.
Namjoon was perfect, a boy-next-door, and soft spoken. Back then I had enough of that passion for the both of us. Now I saw more and more parallels between us than ever before. I was uncertain, waiting for someone else to bring excitement back into my life, too afraid to reach out and take what I wanted anymore.
And then Jimin was there with that big smile willing to take me on whatever adventure I desired. All I had to do was ask. It was exhilarating, fun, and I was happy to be a part of the ride. His softness, his kindness, his understanding- all of it wrapped up in a pretty red bow. A gift that kept on giving.
I did not love Jimin, but I knew then that I could. With his sharp tongue and charisma, it was impossible not to. Everyone else did. Who was I to think I could be any different? I was a slave to his happiness. It was in that moment, sitting in my car, that I finally understood what was happening.
I was falling in love and there was nothing I could do to stop it.
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