#I’m so fixated on this girl I just want to fulfill her and break her and use her anytime I feel like we can just complete each other

[chibelial]

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[youngbugandtonystank]

I saw your gif set where the writers and directors talk about irondad and I feel SO angry! They built their entire relationship for what? Another uncle ben moment? Peter HAD Ben for that purpose. And the way they tried to resolve Tony and Howards relationship in Endgame was disgusting. I know its not your fault but god that gif set just made me remember why i hate endgame so much

Well, you're not alone in this, trust me.

This is exactly what they did to Tony in EG:

They tried to make it seem like it was Tony's attitude the problem all along, that he didn't understand his father enough therefore he was the problem. In EG, to make his arc seem 'complete' they gave him some stitches to cover that up in the form of a family. They gave him a wife, kid and a more 'stable' life. They turned him into Clint. All of this so people could say 'WOW he had a fam for 5 years? I guess his life is over now, he did what he had to do! Bye-bye Iron Man' LMAOOOOOO And they've been doing the same with Peter too since FFH. Instead of letting him deal with a personal death and his own demons, they focused more on him becoming a symbol for the next generation and getting him a girlfriend. Noticed how they actually let Wanda grieve in WandaVision? His brother, her parents, Vision. Even if I don’t like Wanda, I think that WV did so well with showing how broken this girl is (and if they had let her feel responsible for some of her obvious mistakes and reflect on those, it would’ve been even better) They didn't brush it off because it would be impossible that after suffering so many losses you just walk out happy and dandy like they tried to do with Peter and Tony. I happen to think Iron Man 3 is such an important movie because of this; they showed Tony's traumas and real repercussions of him dealing with his superhero life/personal life/traumas. He didn’t walk away with a smile on his face and the consequences were there.

This is what happened basically. They tried to ‘fix’ such a complex character with a ‘fulfilled’ ending. The reason Tony and Peter’s relationship work is because they share similarities (both parents dead, survivor’s guilt, great sense of responsibility, genius brain, ‘weight of the world on shoulders’ m.o., stubbornness, excessive self-critical inferiority, no self-preservation instincts, depression, neglectfulness towards the personal care in favor of addictive distractions, unconscious will of isolation, characteristic savior fixation, anxiety problems, guilt complex, etc) and they get to bond because of those, they get to heal, grow and understand more about themselves in a relationship no one expected. I get they wanted to end Tony’s arc but if they had to convince RDJ for this, it means he wanted a break from the character, not a total separation, sometimes I feel like they made RDJ feel ashamed for still wanting to be Iron Man after so many years, in interviews they would basically say ‘so another IM movie, huh? when will iron man die tho? will you be in a wheel chair in this one?’ and directors would make jokes about it too. Samuel L. Jackson is 73 and has been Nick Fury for 12 years and he has a Disney+ show coming up for this same character; I don’t see anyone complaining. This is just my opinion btw, I’m only saying what I think it happened, not an accurate comment from RDJ himself. Maybe Tony in a coma for a couple of years would’ve been good for him to try new projects and more, and given the chance, he would be back as Iron Man for a cameo or some scenes. I still hold hope tho, these are comic movies, that means no character is ever 100% dead. 

What they did to Tony in EG was lazy.

[thornedrose44]

Prompt: Lena accidentally creates something that makes everyone attracted to her except kara (she is immune) basically jealous!kara 😬

Read on AO3 (Prompt from @urjustwaiting)

“My dearest Lena,” Brainy began, brown eyes bright and earnest as he cradled Lena’s hand in both of his like it was something precious and fragile, “I have always considered you to be my intellectual equal and a friend of the highest order. Recently, however, I have found my feelings of friendship for you have shifted - grown into something unexpected and wondrous.”

Brainy inhaled sharply, gathering his courage as Lena’s eyes widened with abject shock and horror at what was occurring.

“Lena Luthor, I have fallen irrevocably in love with you”, Briany declared confident and unfalteringly certain, “and I was wondering if I could spend time conversing with you over a sizeable meal?”

To say Lena’s day had started strangely would be the understatement of the century. She had arrived at the DEO following the news that there had been an attempted break-in last night at the secret facility that had been successfully fended off by Kara, Brainy, Nia and Andrea (the newest superhero to join the club).

Alex, who had taken her first night off since becoming director, had rushed onsite as soon as she was alerted to what had happened; her first order had been to bring Lena in to evaluate the building’s defenses and put in suitable improvements for any weaknesses identified. It was a sign of how much trust Lena had earned amongst the Superfriends, and more specifically Alex, that no one hesitated to call her in for help with something as sensitive as security flaws.

Lena had fought hard to earn back the trust she had nearly lost, rebuild the bridges both sides had burnt and therefore she didn’t balk at the ridiculously early wake-up call and did not even consider saying no to Alex’s request.

The second she arrived at the DEO, she knew something was off.

People were staring at her, which shouldn’t have been odd for a Luthor in the slightest but Lena was used to being ignored at the DEO. The agents milling the corridors would give fleeting glances and welcoming nods but nothing more - many of them owed their life to a last minute scientific breakthrough courtesy of Lena’s intellect and as such they respected her enough to treat her like she was one of them - like she belonged here - because of it. Walking into the DEO to find herself the subject of many furtive gazes and unsubtle wandering eyes was therefore worrisome to say the least.

Lena’s concern merely increased as she made her way further into the DEO where she couldn’t go more than a metre without being approached by agents trying out a cheesy pick-up line or inviting her to coffee/dinner. Two rather charming agents actually dropped down on one knee at the same time to propose to her there and then - Lena was saved from answering as her wannabe future spouses got into a fist fight. The worst one, by far, was Pam from HR who shouted that she was enthusiastically willing to bear all of Lena’s future children - Lena promptly sprinted into the command centre and had been momentarily relieved to see Brainy there waiting for her.

The relief was obviously dashed a minute later when Brainy grabbed her hand and sweetly announced his love for her.

“Brainy, what the hell!?”

Those were the exact words Lena had wanted to shout but had been unable to find her voice to do so, thankfully (or not so as the case may be), Nia had voiced them for her and was striding into the room with a furious expression on her face.

“Nia, it’s not what it looks like-” Lena rushed to reassure as Nia pushed her boyfriend away from the youngest Luthor.

“How could you?!” Nia demanded, rounding on the Coulan.

“Nia, I think there’s something wrong-” Lena began to interrupt, knowing how much Brainy loved Nia and her alarm bells from the agents earlier ringing loudly in her head when....

“I wanted to ask her out.” Nia exclaimed stamping her foot childishly before turning to face Lena with fluttering eyelashes and a seductive pout. “Lena, please my love is far more real than Brainy’s. Don’t go out with him.” Nia pleaded as Briany scoffed derisively behind her.

“Lena is smart enough to see through your fraudulent affection. She was on the precipice of accepting my offer of a date.” Briany cut in with a superior raise of his chin.

“No, she wasn’t!” Nia rebuked, turning back to Brainy with clenched fists.

“Yes, she was!” Brainy returned, chest puffing out as they both stepped forward as if to engage in battle when a sudden red and blue blur appeared between them as a physical barrier.

“What on Earth is going on?” Kara questioned, brow creased in confusion as she looked between the couple that seemed to be seconds away from trading blows.

“I LOVE LENA MORE!” They both shouted in answer whilst they simultaneously lunged towards one another.

“What?!” Kara gasped as she hurriedly tried to keep the two apart. “Lena?” Kara asked, wide-eyed and gobsmacked, clearly looking for an explanation.

“I don’t know!” Lena responded quick and panicked. “I came in and everyone’s been…”

“Everyone’s been what?” Kara prompted as she ducked a wild swing from a feisty Nia.

“Like this.” Lena gestured to Briany and Nia who were futilely trying to dodge around the kryptonian superhero.

Kara blinked rapidly at this information but reacted quickly, super speeding Brainy and Nia away from the command centre as carefully as she could. Kara was back less than a minute later, appearing harried and uncomfortable but she wasn’t looking at Lena any differently to normal. Soft blue eyes watched her the exact same way and as soon as she was back, she gently encouraged Lena into their standard hug with a light touch to her elbow.

Lena folded happy and willing into Kara’s arms burying her face into the kyrptonian’s shoulder as Kara gently stroked her back.

“So… interesting morning so far?” Kara teased managing to pull forth a relieved chuckle from the CEO.

“You could say that.” Lena sighed, letting her eyes slip closed for a fleeting second as she quickly inhaled Kara’s familiar airy scent before pulling away and putting her armour back on. “I seem to have suddenly become irresistible to everyone here.” Lena explained, nearly convincing herself that she saw a flash of a sad pout on her best friend’s face when she ended their hug. “Except for you, of course.” Lena clarified.

“Well… uh… I…” Kara stammered, face blushing a bright red as she self-consciously rubbed the back of her neck.

“Don’t worry, Kara, I’m not offended.” Lena reassured, giving Kara an out even as it caused her heart to painfully twinge with a familiar loss and yearning that always accompanied the realisation that Kara would never see her the same way.

“Lena-” Kara began, lips pressed tight together as she took a tentative step forward.

“Lena, there you are!”

Kara and Lena’s heads turned immediately to see Andrea striding into the room, dressed to impress in a tight black dress and red soled heels that drew attention to her long, sinful legs.

“Oh, dear…” Lena murmured, swallowing thickly, as Andrea approached with a dark predatory gaze that promised to fulfill all of Lena’s long forgotten teenage fantasies.

Lena was so fixated on the sight of her first crush looking like she was about to devour her right there in the DEO command centre that she didn’t see the heavy frown form on Kara’s face, nor the way blue eyes flickered red for a flash.

The sound of a rumbling growl was the only thing that broke through Lena’s stupor and pre-empted a red-blue blur sweeping Andrea out of the room, presumably to deposit her in the same place as Brainy and Nia.

“Was that your stomach?” Lena asked when Kara reappeared a few moments later.

“Was what my stomach?”

“That growling noise?” Lena inquired with a tilt of her head.

“Uhhhh….” Kara’s mouth opened and closed, the tips of her ears turning red before she nodded her head in jerky agreement. “Yep, stomach, super hungry, no breakfast.”

“You must be, you’re dropping verbs.” Lena joked.

“Uh huh.” Kara muttered, shifting her weight nervously from foot to foot as she intermittently shot discouraging glares to any agents that looked like they were even considering coming up to Lena. “Do you have any idea what’s causing this?” Kara questioned, placing her hands on her hips and trying to ease into her Supergirl persona.

“No.” Lena answered honestly.

“Were you exposed to anything? Or working with anything that might have caused something like this?” There was no accusation within the questions, just genuine curiosity and a desire to work through the possible causes. Lena didn’t doubt Kara’s trust in her, not after everything they had been through.

“No.” Lena replied after thinking carefully.

“You were here yesterday and everyone was fine.” Kara rationalised, “So it must have happened since you left.”

“Kara, I didn’t do anything after I left. I went home, watched a documentary, had a bath and went to bed as I promised you.”

Lena’s work hours since re-taking L-Corp as her own had exploded and her rare free time was regularly being utilised to support the Superfriends. Lena had spent yesterday tweaking Kara’s supersuit to improve its diagnostic capabilities to provide Kara an edge when flying into an unknown situation. It had taken Kara forcibly frog marching her out of the building and using her puppy dog eyes to get Lena to promise that she would finally go home and relax.

“Good girl.” Kara said, softening immediately at Lena’s answer, blue eyes twinkling with pride.

Lena internally screamed at herself to keep her praise kink under tight control.

“Then maybe something happened overnight? Or whilst you were on your way in?” Kara continued to theorise allowing Lena much needed time to regain her cool.

“Unlikely,” Lena replied thoughtfully, “I stopped for coffee on my way in and no one there acted oddly. It wasn’t until I got to the DEO that things changed.”

“Then-”

“SOMETHING WEIRD IS GOING ON!” Alex announced as she strode in, practically snarling at the agents that were working at their consoles, all of whom had looked a second away from getting to their feet and rushing eagerly towards the older Danvers as soon as she appeared.

Kara, meanwhile, instantly moved to be slightly in front of Lena like a personal shield ready to jump forward but careful not to overstep and diminish the CEO’s autonomy - Lena couldn’t help how her heart fluttered at Kara’s mindful concern.

“Are you in love with Lena too?” Kara challenged, narrowing her gaze at her sister.

Alex came to a sharp and sudden stop, jaw dropping open as she looked between Kara and Lena, “Too?” Alex echoed, and Lena watched in confusion as a slow and incredibly bright grin appeared to light up the Director’s face. “Did you finally-”

“BrianyandNiaareinlovewithLena!” Kara yelled, panicked and fast paced, hands flapping wildly at her sides.

The smile vanished alongside whatever Alex had been about to say. “I’m sorry, did you say Brainy and Nia are in love with Lena?”

“Yep.” Kara popped as she let out an unusually large sigh of relief that made Lena think she may have missed something important in the sister’s aborted interaction. “As well as nearly all the DEO agents, but no one from the coffee shop so we think it's localised to here which is weird because we can’t seem to find a potential cause that would explain that.” Kara rambled, clearly intent on brushing over whatever had just happened. “Therefore I asked if you were in love with Lena like Briany, Nia and Andrea.” Kara explained placing unnecessary emphasis on their friends' names.

Alex glanced from Kara to Lena, frowning heavily, “Sorry Lena but I’m quite happily taken.”

“Shame.” Lena tsked, earning her an affectionate eye roll from the redhead, before being struck by a sudden realisation. “Wait, then why were you coming in yelling that something weird is going on if you didn’t know about me?”

Alex shot a look over her shoulder before moving closer to the other two and dropping her voice to a conspiratorial whisper, “People are being… ‘overly friendly’ to me.”

Kara and Lena shared a look.

“Hey!” Alex snapped, bringing guilty green and blue eyes back to her. “I’m being serious here!”

“So by ‘overly friendly’ you mean…” Lena prompted.

“People keep trying to hug me and ask me how my day is going. And they keep… complimenting me.” Alex whispered like she was sharing some heinous crimes.

Both Kara and Lena’s eye muscles twitched with the desire to share another look but they managed to resist - just.

“It’s weird.” Alex defended haughtily. “Yesterday, they were too scared to look me in the eye for longer than a second and now they can’t go ten seconds without giving me a motivational speech about how good a job I’m doing.”

“It could be worse.” Lena said trying to be comforting,

“How?” Alex huffed.

“Well, Pam from HR told me she wanted to bear my children.” Lena said with a shrug that was immediately followed by a loud CRUNCHING noise.

Lena turned to find the source of the ear-splitting sound only to discover that the round titanium table Kara had been leaning against was now heavily crumpled around two tightly clenched kryptonian fists.

“Kara?” Lena squeaked whilst Alex merely face-palmed.

***

“It doesn’t make sense.” Lena mused, unknowingly posed like ‘The Thinking Man’ on the stool as Alex and Kara paced the space.

They had made the wise decision to move to what was considered Lena’s lab at the DEO to free themselves of the foot traffic of the command centre that had both Danvers sisters glowering at any agents that dared to approach (though for vastly different reasons).

“What are you thinking Luthor?” Alex asked, plopping herself down heavily on the stool by the CEO.

“Disparate pieces that don’t logically fit together.” Lena murmured quietly more to herself than to the other two before she lifted her head and tried to slowly talk through what her mind was attempting to process. “Whatever happened, clearly happened in the last,” Lena glanced at her watch, grimacing at the time as her head pounded with lack of sleep, “eight hours. I left here at six yesterday and no one was acting any differently to normal. Whatever has happened changes people’s behaviour towards us.” Lena gestured between herself and Alex, “but only us. And whatever is doing it is localised to the DEO.”

Lena paused, giving the sisters a chance to disagree with her assertion of facts, both Danvers nodded in agreement and encouragement to continue.

“Therefore, we have two options:” Lena continued, laying out the two theories she was working with, “either something happened at the DEO that is causing this and we are merely triggers for it. Or something happened specifically to us and being here is triggering it.”

Alex pursed her lips, thinking carefully through Lena’s logic, “Which do you think is more likely?”

“Something happening at the DEO.” Lena answered with a shrug, “One target, one location, rather than two is more straightforward.”

“Agreed.” Alex sighed, “And we know something did happen after we both left last night.”

“The attempted break in.” Lena concurred.

Alex nodded, shifting to face the kryptonian who had been listening intently to the conversation, “Kara, give us a rundown of what happened.”

Kara frowned, hands moving to rest on her hips in classic Supergirl pose, “It was just dumb thugs looking to make a quick buck. They’d stumbled upon some alien tech that they knew fetched a good price on the black market. Rather than sell it quickly and get away with it, they got greedy. They knew more tech was held here and figured they could double their profits if they used the tech they already had to pull off a heist.”

“I want it noted that the DEO is the worst kept secret in this city,” Lena snarked, with a roll of her eyes, “and that’s saying something considering Supergirl's disguise is a pair of glasses.”

“Noted,” Alex grunted, shooting the youngest Luthor a smug smirk, “which is why making it your job to fix that for us.”

Lena chuckled darkly, “You couldn’t afford my consultation fees.”

Alex’s smugness increased tenfold at that, her chin lifting defiantly as she laid down her ace, “That’s why I’m making Kara be the one to ask you.”

Lena gasped, utterly outraged, “You underhanded-“

“Guys, focus!” Kara bellowed, clapping her hands loudly together to break the two of them out of their regular snarky banter that could go on for a good hour if not interrupted quickly (it was how they showed their affection for one another).

“Right.”

“Sorry.”

Alex and Lena murmured apologetically, gazes dropping to the floor as Kara shook her head in amusement at their familiar antics.

“What tech did they use?” Alex questioned, bringing them back on track.

“Stupid gas.”

Lena’s brow furrowed at the response and Alex’s aggrieved grunt that followed it, “I’m sorry, what?”

“It’s a bio weapon that makes-“

“People stupid?” Lena guessed.

“Hyper emotional, but… yeah.” Alex clarified, “Like when I was exposed to it, I just laughed for like an hour straight.”

Lena hummed thoughtfully, brain whirring away to make connections with this new information, “Are kryptonians immune?”

“No.” Alex laughed, earning her a pout from the Super that made Lena take a mental note to beg Kara for the obvious story behind it another time.

“Then why isn’t Kara affected by all of this?” Lena questioned, throwing in the other variable they hadn’t considered.

“Now that you mention it, the stupid gas didn’t work on me last night.”

Alex’s face scrunched up in confusion, “It did last time.”

Kara shrugged, seemingly unconcerned, “I think Lena’s upgraded suit protected me.”

“My upgraded…” Lena began slowly, her eyes suddenly going wide as she recognised the suit Kara was currently wearing to be the one she had been tinkering with all day yesterday, “Kara, I told you not to wear that yet. I hadn’t finished tweaking it!”

Kara winced at the sharp tone, hands flying up in supplication and surrender, as she whined defensively, “It worked perfectly Lena.”

“That’s not the point-“ Lena rebuked, crossing her arms aggressively causing the superpowered alien to shrink under her green-eyed glare.

“Kara’s not affected...” Alex murmured, though her voice was quiet there was something sharp to her tone that cut through the room - it was the tone that preceded a ‘Eureka’.

“Alex?” Kara and Lena both prompted.

“I have an idea.” Alex announced jumping to her feet, and snatching up her jacket, “I need to test something out.”

“Okay, what are you thinking?” Kara called out as Alex rushed out of the lab.

“I’m thinking that I’m grateful I memorised the number of that twenty four hour Chinese takeaway.”

***

Lena and Alex stood back and watched in complete horror as the DEO agents ravaged the table loaded up with potstickers, stuffing their mouths with ten at a time and throwing punches over the last handfuls. They had to forcibly pull Kara away from the scene who twitched with the obvious desire to throw herself into the mix to get a share for herself.

“I don’t understand.” Kara wailed, stamping her foot pathetically, once they had returned to the lab.

“Oh my god.” Lena muttered, snatching up the tablet she had been using yesterday and scrolling through everything she had done to Kara’s suit, leaving the explanation task to the older Danvers.

“They’re feeling what you feel.” Alex announced, “Lena and I aren’t the catalyst. You are.”

Kara’s crinkle appeared and deepened.

“It’s why everyone has been so friendly to Alex.” Lena mumbled, taking over the explanation absentmindedly as she distractedly ran through data, looking between the suit upgrades and the specification of ‘Stupid Gas’. “They feel your sisterly love for her and are treating her like you would but to an extreme degree. It must be because of their exposure to the gas mixed with some upgrade I put into your suit.” Lena frowned, mind running a mile a minute, “I fitted in further diagnostic capabilities that might be able to identify biological toxins and alert you, but-“ Lena froze, head snapping upwards to stare dumbly at her best friend, her entire brain grinding to a dead halt.

“Lena?” Kara inquired, blue eyes instantly glowing with concern at Lena’s absolute stillness and dead-eyed stare.

Alex nudged Kara’s side and whispered helpfully, “I think she’s just realised.”

“Realised what?”

Alex directed a soft and understanding smile at her sister, “How people have been acting towards her and what that means…”

“Oh…” Kara squeaked, paling considerably and breath held tight as she waited for Lena to finally react.

“You want to bear my children?!” Lena yelled incredulously, shattering the awkward silence with that explosive revelation.

Kara’s entire body flushed crimson, as she spluttered out (unable to stop herself), “Ummm… I mean… Preferably after a few dates…”

“Annnnnnd that’s my cue…” Alex announced, turning on her heel sharply and marching out of the room.

Lena blinked repeatedly, still not fully rebooted from this turn of events and everything it could potential - hopefully - entail.

“Lena… I…” Kara began, voice thick with emotion as she took timid, shaky steps towards her best friend, “I don’t know what to say…”

“You love me?” Lena asked, the bluntness of the question softened by the tremble to her voice that highlighted the vulnerability and hope of the question.

It was the hopefulness in Lena’s voice and the way green eyes were dark with poorly hidden want that gave Kara the courage to lift her chin, puff out her chest and declare sincerely, “More than anything.”

Lena let out a shaky breath, throwing her tablet down on the bench and demanding sternly, “Take off the suit.”

“Really?” Kara’s eyes bulged at the request, the flush from earlier deepening to a boiled crimson, “I mean I’m not saying no but I was kind of hoping we could go out on a date first. Maybe? If you’re interested?”

“Kara,” Lena said stepping forward into Kara’s personal space which effectively stopped Kara’s ramble, “you’re still wearing the upgraded suit which is feedbacking to everyone in the DEO your emotions. If you take it off everyone goes back to normal.”

“Oh,” Kara breathed, shaking her head with embarrassment, “I thought-“

Lena reached out, threading her fingers through Kara’s golden hair affectionately before seeking out the nape of her neck to gently tug Kara down the couple of inches between them so that she could press their lips hotly together. Kara’s hands instantly sought out Lena’s hips even as her mouth slipped open granting access to Lena’s insistent tongue.

Lena’s free hand traced the emblem on the supersuit whilst she teased her nails against Kara’s neck earning her an appreciative groan that served as the only warning before Kara effortlessly hoisted Lena up onto the lab bench pressing eagerly forward into the space between Lena’s legs.

Lena nipped at Kara’s bottom lip before breaking away, panting heavily to regain her breath. Kara, meanwhile, didn’t even hesitate to track kisses down Lena’s jaw and neck, sucking at her pulse-point until Lena’s legs wrapped tightly around Kara’s body desperately trying to earn some relief.

“Do you have any idea how long I’ve wanted to do this?” Lena gasped.

“Oh, I do.” Kara murmured earnestly, leaning back to fully appreciate how wrecked Lena looked.

Lena lightly shoved Kara back with a playful laugh, fingers tapping against the edges of Kara’s supersuit emblem as she quirked a mischievous eyebrow. “The sooner you take this off, the sooner the problem is fixed and we can go on that date.”

Kara’s entire expression lit up at that and in flash she had disappeared only to return less than a second later dressed in the DEO sweatsuit that Lena adored.

“Shall we?” Kara checked, bouncing up and down so excitedly that Lena couldn’t resist pulling her back in for another deep kiss.

[sekceesimps]

Dying Light (a yandere Zhongli x reader oneshot)

summary: Zhongli comes to claim his darling after she fails to fulfill her end of the contract 

a/n I wish I could say this was requested but I love this man too much. Writing this one had me feeling some kind of way… Hope you all enjoy and leave some requests (pls do yandere Genshin 🤧 smh)! 

Sincerely Coffee

His dark hair shines vividly in the solemn moonlight. Amber eyes radiant, like the purest of diamonds, and fixated right on you. You stand before him and try to subtly shrink away under his piercing gaze. The candles in the room flicker from some gusts of wind coming in. Zhongli seems stiff and at attention, but at the same time far away, lost in thought. Your light and unconscious movement backwards out of fear, unnoticed by you, immediately snapped the archon’s thoughts back to you. 

A ghost of a smile begins to dance its way onto his handsome face, a stark difference to the dangerous threats he had whispered into your ear just moments ago. The light gave him an eerie appearance. 

“Darling Y/N, I’m afraid that you didn’t uphold your end of the bargain,” he frowned and cocked his head mockingly. You step backwards some more until your back hits the wall of the funeral parlor. He has a predatory gaze now as he steps forward and pins a hand on the surface next to your head. He leans forward to further take in your panic. It brought him distress to see that you weren’t comfortable around him. 

“I’m sure you were a good girl and read the fine print. Surely you must be aware that at the end of our contract, if it was that you couldn’t fulfill your end of the deal, then you must join the greatest contract of all time with me?” he continues and runs another hand hand teasingly down your jaw. 

“Perhaps you could entertain me and tell me what that greatest contract is?” you ask hesitantly. Beginning to feel the gravity of the situation as you notice the way the archon caresses you and looks at you with eyes filled with a dangerous sort of adoration. 

“Oh Y/N, you’ve been bad, I thought you understood everything when you signed. I mean marriage of course,” he answered gleefully, eyes sparkling with affection and excitement at your shocked expression. 

Yes, just when did this feeling for you begin, he had pondered to himself. There was no mistaking that these emotions he felt for you were love. He was sure that you also loved him, so why did you look so afraid? He would show you again how perfect the two of you are. 

- - - 

Zhongli is not one to break his word. He is the archon of contracts after all. When you had approached him, as Rex Lapis, a few months ago he had decided to learn much more about you.  

You were an interesting mortal and had almost immediately caught the God’s attention. The geo archon had taken to shying away from the affairs of humans over the last hundred years or two. However he tended to make exceptions for interesting people with even more interesting requests. 

“I’d like to ask for some help,” your melodic voice said, breaking the silence in Rex Lapis’s abode. “If that means signing into a contract with you, then I accept,”

He appeared near you in an instant, “Even if that means not getting the best deal?” he asks, startling you slightly. 

“Yes,” you breathe out lightly. 

“Hmm, you’ve caught my interest,” he responds, putting a hand to his chin, as if he was thinking long and hard about a potential deal with you, “do go on with what you need my help for” he finishes. Of course, he already knew what you needed. He had been watching you for quite a while, but he loved hearing your voice and being near you for once. 

“I need to find someone and I can’t do it by myself. Could you please lend me your strength and assistance as I look for this person” you practically begged him. Oh how he wanted to hear your begging in a different context. It was taking everything within him to not tug you by your hair and bring you to his side forever by force. He knew that you probably wouldn’t appreciate that and he still had to do his job and draft a contract. That is when the idea had struck him to skillfully find a way to keep you with him forever. 

“Very well, let us start writing up a contract then,” he pronounces with a tone of disinterest, secretly preening with joy on the inside. You perk up and smile largely at him, it brought him satisfaction knowing that he made you feel like that. 

“Alright that should be everything,” he finishes and removes his quill from the scroll. “I will come to you whenever you need help, all you must do is call out my name. As for my benefit, all you need to do is find this person you hold dear and that will be enough for me. You have the next 70 days to complete this, of course there will be a punishment if you can’t fulfill your end. However I have the most faith in your skills.” you nod at him in confirmation as you take the pen from him and leave a scrawling signature on the paper. A glowing binding tying you to the archon, prompting you to blush at how close the two of you were now. “Don’t disappoint me, Y/N'' he whispered and let you leave his abode with a smile. The first step in his plan to make you his was finished. Time to wait for your inevitable failure. 

Now he wasn’t going to actively make you fail, he still was true to his job and bound himself to you so that you could call him for help. He would still assist you as well. However, he agreed to what you wanted because he knew the task itself was impossible. This brother you were looking for was long gone for sure, he made sure of that before he signed on to your contract. He couldn’t wait for when the two of you would finally be spending the next few weeks together. 

 Zhongli was smart about the way he conducted himself around you. He was careful not to give you any hints of his true intentions. Sometimes though there would be foolish people who pushed him. Whenever he saw you talking with, brushing arms with, or giving attention to others, the archon would be fuming. Of course, he would let it simmer, playing for the long game instead. It never failed to make him angry and anxious that these insignificant mortals thought they had a change with his future wife, it caused him to let out a tsch in annoyance. 

The two of you had wonderful moments in your quest. Your ability to work well together in battle allowed for quick defeats of random hilichurls on the journey. Truly your skills were something he admired and loved about you. 

The first night you left a parting goodnight kiss on his cheek was what made him truly believe in life again. Your warm lips against his skin ignited a flame within him that he didn’t know he yearned to have lit.  It began to become a sort of tradition between you two for the next months. 

 His favorite moment with you by far was when the two of you had been drinking and you allowed him to come into your bed. Now, not in THAT way. You didn’t like how he had been sleeping on the ground whenever you spent the night in a tavern so you told him to just sleep in the bed with you. It had been an awkward fit at first due to his taller frame. His long limbs were cramped painfully so you let him wrap his arms carefully around your body. Both of you take in and are intoxicated by the other’s warmth. He could get used to the way you faced him and nuzzled your face into his neck. He had fallen asleep and had the most wonderful rest for the first time in a while. 

After the two of you woke up and cuddled in the morning, “Should the day ever come where we are not together, you will continue to shine like gold in my memories” he had smiled and gently taken your hand into his own as he brushed his lips softly against your knuckles. His words and soft actions prompting a light blush across your face. 

He didn’t know how much longer he could wait for you. Every moment he was with you, but not truly in the way he desired wound him up more and more. He knew he would snap very soon. 

- - - 

You tremble against the cold breeze and his warm touch as he leans closer to you and captures your warm lips with his own in a passionate kiss. His hands traveling down further onto your flushed skin. 

Now that you were his in an unbreakable bond, he finally felt at ease. With you, Zhongli felt at home for the first time in thousands of years. He would protect you from any and all threats. If it meant keeping you safe with him, then he would tear apart all of Teyvat. After all, you belonged to this archon now. 

As the sun begins to rise, you notice the dying light within the parlor, fading candles leaving behind a darker atmosphere. A perfect metaphor you think, if he kept touching you like this then you knew that your own resolve would also die out, completely accepting the ownership that he had over you. 

Zhongli notices your wandering gaze before he takes your face between his slender fingers and forces you to look up at him. “Perhaps you’ve forgotten how much you mean to me. Let me remind you,” he announces as he lifts you up and brings you towards his room. Indeed, he would be spending the next few hours reminding you of his love, before you embark on the next chapter of your lives together, courtesy of his subclause turning you into an adeptus in addition to being his wife forever more. He had all the time in the world to get you to comply and love him as dearly as he loves you.

a/n why am I so in love with this man 🧎‍♀️

[dialovers-translations]

DIABOLIK LOVERS DARK FATE Official Visual Fanbook Short Story: Mukami Ruki VS Mukami Yuma

Source: Diabolik Lovers Dark Fate Official Visual Fanbook

Release date: 2015

Disclaimer: Both sides portray the same story, but from a different perspective. The first story is written from Ruki’s POV, while the second portrays the events from Yuma’s POV.

RUKI’S SIDE

With the book in my hands still turned open, I gaze at the TV.

Yuma’s disrupting presence as he sits next to her does cross my mind, but I do not let it show on my face. 

On the screen which she watches with her full attention, a movie is playing about a gravely ill young girl and a doctor who tries every option available to him to cure her. 

While watching this cliched story unfold with a cold expression on my face, a thought emerges in the back of my subconsciousness. 

Would I be capable of doing something for another person? Would I ever find myself growing utterly desperate for the sake of just a single individual, just like the man in this movie? 

While lost in thought, my gaze involuntarily shifts to her, as I go against all of my principles and start to ponder.

...If she were to be the young girl in this movie, what actions would I take? Would I be able to save her? 

Since she is a human, she should fear death. In that case, if she were to become a Vampire like me, she would be freed from this fear of one day meeting her end.

“...Uu...”

I hear a small grunt which snaps me out of my trail of thought. I can tell she is crying even without looking at her face. 

Seems like the movie had ended at some point. Not only did I break character by showing interest in some wordly movie, but I ended up putting her in place of the movie’s protagonist. 

“Wouldn’t that shit get cured from eatin’ Sugar-chan?”

“That is impossible if you think logically.”

I subconsciously reacted to Yuma’s carefree statement. Of course, I know that Yuma was only saying that as a joke as well. 

However, perhaps it is because I replaced the protagonist with inside my head, but my tone sounded quite harsh.

As respectively human and Vampire, our vision on death is different. That being said, life is not easy for either of us.

“...Being alive comes with a lot of pain and suffering...”

When I look at her while she continues to sob quietly, she seems somewhat dazed, as if the movie is still lingering inside her head.

I can only assume that this tale embraces something only a human can comprehend.

“...They say that one’s soul weighs 21 grams. Did you know?”

When I pose said question, she lifts her head to look at me.

“Heeh, I see...I wonder if that’s heavy?”

I have trouble answering her question. However, I could definitely declare the weight of her soul in particular.

“Livestock, your soulーー”

Your soul should be heavy. She has a definite value after all. Without being able to finish my sentence, I am interrupted by Yuma.

Looking at Yuma as he states a soul weighs the same as five sugar cubes, her eyes start to glimmer.

The feeling which quietly wells up inside of me as a result isn’t rivalry towards Yuma. I simply did not like how she seems to have forgotten who she belongs to.

“Lemme suck yer blood. I’ll suck ya plenty to make up for all this time ya kept me waitin’!”

Yuma restrained both of her wrists as he purred. She looked at me to seek rescue, but those teary eyes of her only lured me in instead. 

“To find out the weight of your soul, your blood is the best way.”

I gently lift her chin, locking eyes with her.

“I’ll teach you one more time who you belong to.”

I was the only one reflected in her eyes, which twitched either out of fear or anticipation. 

ーー End.

YUMA’S SIDE

I wonder how long it has been since I sat down next to her?

“Come on Sow, open yer mouth.”

Even if I bring Sugar-chan to her lips, she won’t even bat an eye. 

“Want me to thrust it in there again, huh?”

This time I try to force her to look my way, but she grabs hold of both of my wrists and attempts to break free. On top of that, her eyes remain glued to the television screen.

“This is an important scene, so hold on for a bit.”

I get the same response again. I don’t think I’ll able to able to understand what’s so fun about these kind of tearjerkers. 

If you’re wondering why I’ve remained seated next to her regardless, that’s because there’s one other person present in the living room right now. I want to avoid leaving her all alone with Ruki, who was sitting a few inches away from us on the couch.

Since she didn’t seem to be in the mood to entertain me at present, I had no idea what to do now that my hands had let go of Sugar-chan.

“...Uu...”

When I glance at her face after hearing a soft sniffle, tears were pooling in the corners of her eyes.

I wonder how she can cry this much from some movie about a girl who is gravely ill? 

“Wouldn’t that shit get cured from eatin’ Sugar-chan?”

“That is impossible if you think logically.”

It was meant to be more of a nonchalant remark, but Ruki immediately responded in his usual fashion.

“...Being alive comes with a lot of pain and suffering...”

Ruki gazes off into the distance, speaking those words as if he seemingly just came to a realization.

Even though I had been sitting here messing with her, her mind seemed to have been fixated on the television screen this whole time. Knowing I’ve been kept waiting for some stupid movie triggers my temper.

“...They say that one’s soul weighs 21 grams. Did you know?”

My thoughts get interrupted by Ruki’s sudden statement.

“Heeh, I see...I wonder if that’s heavy?”

The Sow looks up at him with reddened eyes.

If Ruki starts to ramble about the weight of souls now, her attention will be completely on him. First that darn movie and now Ruki, huh...!?

“Livestock, your soulーー”

“One Sugar-chan weighs ‘bout four grams...Which means a soul is give or take five Sugar-chans, huh? That’s lighter than I thought.”

“Wow! You make it so easy to understand!”

She smiled at me after I blurted out those words on a whim.

“Well, your blood is way more delicious than Sugar-chan tho.”

When I say that, I suddenly get an overwhelming craving for the blood pumping through her veins. This sensation which is unlike anything else became vivid inside my mind once more through my own words. The desire was further spurred on by the relief when she finally looked my way, as well a sense of fulfillment from winning over Ruki.

“Lemme suck yer blood. I’ll suck ya plenty to make up for all this time ya kept me waitin’!”

While saying that, I tightly grab hold of both of her wrists with one hand. Those slender wrists are within my grasp in no time.

“To find out the weight of your soul, your blood is the best way.”

While I purr, Ruki lifts her chin with a dissatisfied expression on his face, looking straight into her eyes. 

I’d love to tell him to back off, but I’m sure that having Ruki and I suck her blood simultaenously will make her blood all the more delicious. 

While imagining how interesting that could be, I plunge my fangs inside her fair skin.

ーー End.

[autisticandroids]

I appreciate you being Dean concerned and not Dean critical. I’m sure you’ve already answered this before but what do you genuinely like about him? A lot of his good traits get twisted in your meta (and in the show) which is really interesting! But like. What about him do you just think is neat?

Also, you don’t talk about Sam a lot but I’m rewatching season 8 and it really feels like both a continuation of preseason one -> season one (Sam has a normal life, Dean is gone -> Sam wants to return to his normal life but Dean coming back gets him back in the game) which also gives it finale vibes :(

Besides the fact that the stuff with Amelia is really boring, it all just feels ooc and like a step back for Sam. Not to go on a rant but Sam seemed to finally make peace with his life back in season 7.

The stuff with Amelia also has both the same and the exact opposite energy as the stuff with Lisa. During his time with Lisa, it was always like Dean had one foot out the door back to hunting. During his time when he goes back to hunting with Dean in season 8, it feels like Sam always has one foot out the door back to Amelia.

That and I just can’t bring myself to give a shit about Amelia (maybe because she’s boring and inconsistent, maybe because info about her is drop fed instead of presented mostly all at once like with Lisa in season 6, maybe because she’s just shoved in for something for Sam to be up to and it feels ooc to me idk)

I thought I’d like season 8 (and I do really like a lot of Cas’ stuff but he’s always my favorite anyway so that was basically gaurenteed) but a lot of the stuff just makes my brain feel like a white noise machine. I’m only on episode 10 so I’m sure it’ll get better for me once the Sam stuff gets resolved but for now it’s very.... eh.

Thoughts?

okay so, what i like about dean. hm. that's hard! i love dean, for all sorts of reasons, and i know i'll miss stuff, but: - he charms me, on a sort of pure, animal level. he's very charming, that's true within the show but it's true for the audience, or at least me, as well. he's funny, he's affectionate, he's sweet, and he tries so hard. and it makes me love him - he's compellingly tragic. like dean is a fucked up guy, he hurts both himself and everyone around him because of patterns of trauma an neurosis he can't break out of. no one wants to be a bad guy, no one wants to hurt the ones they love, least of all dean, but he can't stop doing both those things. like his self-made cage of ideology, emotional repression, and control is killing him, and it's killing everyone who doesn't get away from him, and that's sad! it's awful! no one is winning except dean's self-image. he will sacrifice everyone and everything he loves on the altar of never having to re-evaluate himself. or, i hope he won't. but he might! and that's sad! it's the perfect tragedy! - second hand deangirlism due to cas kinnie disease. men will be the first person who was ever nice to castiel and then me and castiel will love them forever about it. - he is my little puzzle box and i will solve him - straightmarried gf i liked that sam ran off and tried to escape The Life in s8, that makes sense to me. i think sam really fundamentally doesn't want to be a hunter and the only reason he gives up on trying to leave post s8 is that it is impressed upon him that he's completely trapped. he can never be free. dean will always drag him back, kicking and screaming. i actually feel like sam's equivalent to lisa isn't amelia, it's jess. i talked some about that here but like. both jess and lisa were kind of synecdoches for a false ideal of the american dream, each in their own way. they're both images of suburban perfection, and what draws the winchesters to them is the desire to fit into that image.

but comparing lisa and amelia..... like, dean promises sam that he will go try to make a normal life with lisa, and then he does, because that obligation is all he has left to cling to. like dean is nothing but a miserable little pile of duties and tasks, he doesn't know who he is without a chore (see: demon!dean's total directionlessness) and lisa is the last promise he made to his brother, so he fulfills that. she's an idea to him, not a real woman. the thing he's clinging to, in sam's absence, is not lisa, but the idea of a normative suburban lifestyle. but then the moment sam shows up and voids his own last wishes, dean is like okay bye i don't need to fulfill this obligation anymore. like he was never all that interested in lisa. he didn't love her and his relationship with her was built on obligations, normative images, and anxiety over her safety, which finally resolves itself in dean horrifically violating her by asking cas to wipe her memories.

whereas sam is with amelia because he like, meets her and they form a connection. they hit it off. and sam has a pattern of like. when he wants to get away from something, especially if dean isn't around, he jumps into bed with the nearest girl who smiles at him and then forms a super intense with her. his early season one-off love interests, ruby, and now amelia. (amelia is actually kind of the last time he does that, because after season eight he gives up trying to escape for real). but what he's clinging to there isn't an image that he's trying to fit into. it's the girl herself. like he likes amelia and he wants to be around her and he dives into like. spending time with her and building a relationship with her. and like amelia is a real woman and sam sees her as a real woman. like she's a fucked up mess and so is he and they connect. like she's a bitch and she clogs her drain with limes. also #MyGirlfriendsHusbandFightsForYourFreedom. like samelia is a little boring but i don't begrudge sam that. it's almost compelling because it's boring.

i'm actually not a huge season eight guy myself but my issue with it isn't samelia.

actually, and this is a complete tangent, can i bitch about season ten for a second? like. okay. seasons eight and nine are about sam learning that dean will never let him go. that he's trapped forever in the hunting life and trapped forever with his brother, that dean will do horrific things to him in order to keep them together. and slowly just... giving up. deciding to relinquish his dreams of getting out once and for all.

and then season ten rolls around and suddenly sam makes a hypocrite of himself? suddenly sam is the one who will go to any lengths to save dean, even against dean's own wishes? NOT believable. like sam should be like. sad and fucked up about it, but letting dean go his own way. if anything, cas should be the one trying to save dean against his will, that's way more cas' move. like there's definitely a certain level of cas -> dean :: dean -> sam that exists in the show, at least in terms of protective fixation. cas is somewhat more respectful of dean's boundaries and autonomy, but he's the one with a pattern of blowing up at dean for being self-destructive etc etc.

like, sam should have been way different in s10. i don't know exactly what i would do with him, maybe give him his own distinct plot? or maybe have demon dean last somewhat longer and make "demon dean tries to kill sam" a whole multi-episode arc, i think that would slap. and then the relationship fallout from that can be many more episodes.

like imo this happened because jeremy carver got his start in season three, when sam legitimately was trying to save dean against dean's wishes, but in s3 that made sense. like, one, the brothers were much closer then, dean wasn't quite as much of a prison guard for sam, but two, much more importantly, dean's deal was sam's fault. he blamed himself. he wasn't just trying to save dean from dying, he was trying to save dean from going to hell because of him. like girl, it made sense in mystery spot. but this is not the energy you should be bringing to the table with sam in s10. ooc!

[rubykgrant]

I’m gonna ramble about the Director and Allison, because I have all these background thoughts with them, and I’m not sure if it’ll come up in my story-line much, but still... I thinks me thoughts-

I’ve never been shy about trash-talking the Director, or as I like to call him, Dr Sadboy McDeadwife. Oh sure, he certainly had a lot of tragedy in his life, he lost people he cared about, and I have perhaps a drop of sympathy for him... but, y’know, he also used his loss as motivation to manipulate and torture people, basically getting everybody around him killed, just to fulfill his own agenda. Basically, he sucks (and I’m not slamming anybody who enjoys his character; we all have a jerk in our favorite collection, and just from a story point of view, he’s a very interesting character). Like many “I’d kill for the one I love” characters, he loses perspective; would Allison want him to turn Project Freelancer into a front for his personal experiments with AI? No, she seems to have been somebody that cared about human life and genuinely wanted people to survive the war. Instead of actually solving problems or protecting people, the Director used Freelancers for gathering equipment, causing all kinds of internal power-struggles on Earth... he even helped start the false “Red Team/Blue Team” propaganda, getting people to sign up for a totally fake war with fake armies but with REAL weapons, which got many of them REALLY killed. The Freelancers robbed office buildings and played capture the flag. Down the road, this created the Flag Zealots and the incident with Temple’s group. Would Allison want him to IGNORE THEIR DAUGHTER, the person who was still alive, the person they had brought into the world together? I very much doubt it. If he HAD somehow gotten Allison back, would she still want HIM? In the end, he finally realized he couldn’t get what he wanted, and so he gave up (in a very final way). Perhaps he saw it as poetic punishment, but... it would have been nice if he had, at least, left behind something besides a legacy of ruin. The first AI he created, Alpha, was gone. As were the others. The only one left was the memories of Epsilon, who still had so many questions regarding what/why/how in terms of his own existence. There were still several Freelancers out there, now wanted criminals on the run for their lives or locked up. The Director saw the AI as extensions of his own mind, selfishly believing that the pain he caused them was also inflicted on himself... they certainly felt his pain and were at times consumed by his obsession (in different ways). However, when he began breaking Alpha into pieces, he didn’t break himself as well each time. While he may have been arguably “punished” for his crimes, he didn’t really apologize for them or attempt to fix anything (and if he’d talked to other people... maybe the truth about Charon would have come out sooner. Chorus could have been saved the bloodiest part of their manipulated war).

Allison is more of an enigma, because although we get to know Tex pretty well, “Allison” as herself is only seen vaguely through the memories of the director, and mentioned briefly by Carolina. We know she wanted to help people. We know that she was often absent from Carolina’s life, and hated to say good-bye. We know she unfortunately died before coming back to her family. If I can simply use my own imagination... I can’t help but think that she was very idealistic, and perhaps something she and the Director shared was poor perspective; she lived in a time when humanity’s survival was low, the outlook dreary. Perhaps when she met somebody who was so eagerly devoted to her, she didn’t hesitate to fall recklessly in love as well. No time to take things slow, the world could end tomorrow. Perhaps she wanted children as soon as possible, because this was the only chance to create a new generation. Even if the previous people didn’t survive, humanity still had a chance. Perhaps she didn’t simply stop fighting and decide to stay at home, because that wouldn’t be fair. So many people weren’t able to be with their children, and if she could help end the war, then EVERYBODY would come home. The Director was overly selfish, but Allison was overly SELFLESS, and it wound up hurting others (obviously, Allison had different motivations, so I wouldn’t quite say she’s “equally at fault”... and it sure wasn’t her fault she DIED). Because she cared so much about so many people, Allison accidentally ignored the person who needed her most; Carolina. She was (presumably) only about 6 years old when her mother died, and even then had not been able to see her very often. Again, I can’t blame Allison for the worst of it, because she wasn’t THERE, but she chose not to be there in the beginning... mostly with good intentions, but she simply didn’t think about the results of her actions. The Director was perfectly aware of what he was doing, and didn’t care. Before these actions started hurting the rest of the world, it hurt a little girl first. Carolina lost her mother AND her father (one unfortunately died, and the other just STOPPED being a parent). Some of this is purely my own brain nonsense, because we just don’t KNOW a lot about Allison, or how much over-lap she could have had with Tex’s personality. Speaking of Tex, I always felt that, in the beginning, Alpha hadn’t intended the Beta AI to be a clone of Allison. It was the Director who began putting his own memories of her into the Beta’s program, and because he was so fixated on her death and “failure”, this is was doomed Tex later on. If there was at least one trait that carried over from Allison to Tex, it was her determination. Even when Tex knew she was probably going to fail, she still TRIED.

[mogsk]

So I watched an anime called “Violet Evergarden” recently, the elevator pitch of which is basically “feral girl is taken in by military man, turned into a child soldier, military man dies, but not before telling her ‘I love you’, but she doesn’t know what that means, so after the war she becomes a ghostwriter with the ostensible aim of figuring out what ‘I love you’ means through other people’s expressions of love via letter-writing.

It’s a good little concept, and while I enjoyed it, it’s also stuck in my brain as being profoundly odd from a storytelling perspective.

Like, the initial premise is v strong, Violet’s driving objective is to understand the last thing she heard her father figure, “The Major”, say to her before she blacked out and woke up with no arms. She was a feral orphan child with little grasp of language or expression, and so she is burdened with not understanding what this very important person to her was trying to convey before they parted ways. Good shit.

And it seems to carry this fairly well at first. Each episode varies in how much it advances the central plot, but each boils down to Violet having to learn a lesson about how people express their feelings for each other, how they express love through words, or how they fail to do so, and so slowly she goes from only being able to produce very precise and terse letters which read more like military reports, to being able to swoop in and fix people’s interpersonal problems with the power of a well-dictated love note.

Where it kinda falls apart for me is about halfway through the series, where we see that Violet has more or less grown into her role as protagonist in an anime about the power of letter writing and the meaning of love (-ish). She’s gotten so good she’s tasked with facilitating one half of a romantic correspondence between the nobles of two nations whose relations are still tense after The War (which Violet fought in), and so have decided to arrange a marriage between their noble children -- a 14-year old girl and a 24-year old man.

Now up to that point, the messaging around the central theme felt odd, but it made sense, like, Violet is growing to understand love, and so how the show does this is by giving her a lot of weird and fraught situations around that theme: we have a woman who is in love with a man, but she wants to play hard to get which Violet ruins by writing a letter that just directly states ‘I have no feelings for you, please stop calling on me’. So then she goes to letter-writing school where one of her classmates has an alcoholic brother who she wants to express her love and thanks towards, but doesn’t know how to pierce the barrier of grief surrounding him due to the death of their parents in The War. 

It keeps on like this p consistently, the central question “What is love? What does someone mean when they say ‘I love you’?” is addressed fairly cleanly, but then, once the issue of Violet’s struggle with being able to convey people’s emotions becomes effectively resolved, we kinda start to leave the rails!

Back to the mid-point episode, so, through trying to properly convey this 14yo princess’ feelings, Violet learns what her true feelings are. No, it’s not that she is discontent with being forced to marry a man ten years older than her because, you see, they already secretly met at a royal party when she was, like...10?? And he found her crying and was, like, “Hey kid, you okay?” and that was the first genuine expression of human emotion outside of her dutiful maid she’d ever gotten. You see, what her discontent is is that she knows the man she met, with a heart so simple and pure he feels compelled to comfort a crying child, would never write these letters, and so Violet conspires with the prince’s ghostwriter to allow them to have a more honest correspondence (which is then reprinted in all the newspapers around both countries.)

What got me about this episode is how it, like, throws all these different narrative threads in the air around this central theme of “What is love?” -- the concept of arranged marriage, the idea of confusing appreciating someone’s kindness for having other feelings for them, the MAID who is, like, the princess’ closest friend and confidant, but who has to explain that, once she’s married off, they will have to part ways because she doesn’t serve the princess, she serves the royal family and there’s this great scene where the princess is weeping after she says that and the maid is like “I cannot accept that command, I will continue standing here right by your side” and it’s really intense!

But then...it all gets dropped in the interest of the final note being...yeah sometimes you have to marry a guy in his twenties when you’re just a teenager, but love’s just funny like that ig!

Which sounds ungenerous, and like, I wanted that to be the case, I wanted it to be setting up something, like, “Despite Violet gaining proficiency in letter writing, she still is struggling to understand the more nuanced dimensions of love and so her shortsightedness will come back round to bite her in the ass” (it does not, we even get a montage of all the people she’s helped including the newly married royal couple smiling happily at the camera.) 

We then get more episodes like this, where Violet’s done learning about Love and is now in effect teaching it to others. She does this by...sitting and looking pretty with a guy while they wait for a comet to go by, imitating a playwright’s dead daughter so he can be inspired to finish his play, and...writing a bunch of letters on behalf of a mother dying from anime mom disease, but who wants to be able to speak to her daughter as she grows up through a series of pre-written birthday letters.

And, like, in isolation, it’s all very moving! Each story has a very touching emotional drive to it, but it seems like the question of “What does ‘I love you’ mean?” p much falls to the wayside, even after we get the big 3/4s of the way through reveal that the Major is dead and Violet didn’t know! So we’re treated to flashbacks of their relationship, including the moment where he repeats that damning phrase!

But then we really don’t pick it back up again? It kinda superficially grows in relevance as we approach the conclusion, but it’s never again properly addressed until after a sudden spat of military drama breaks out with people trying to reignite The War and Violet suddenly having to put down her typewriter and pick up her combat knife, but now, for some reason, she refuses to kill people because...she isn’t just a tool?

And I think this is what ultimately frustrated me, is that those are two great themes “Discovering what it means to love” and “Can a person conditioned to fulfill a specific purpose ever be free to choose their own path?” but the problem is, the series really has centered itself on the former while kinda sorta implying the latter, but in the final scenes, we are suddenly given a resolution to the latter (which is basically Metal Gear Solid, “You are not your DNA”, “Just live Snake” that’s been done beautifully and with more thought already by, well, Metal Gear Solid) whereas the former, what was the entire driving force behind Violet’s character development is kinda sorta hand-waved off as “What is love? I still don’t think I know, but maybe that’s just how it is!” which is fucked up coming from someone who by the midway point is basically counselling or facilitating love between people!

So, like, I enjoyed it a lot, there were some great moments and the supporting cast, while mostly one-dimensional save for Violet herself, made for at least nice scenery, but I’m just so blown away by how they seemed to manage to forget (or ceased wanting) to tell the story they laid out in the beginning in favor of some p uniform military drama that suffered precisely because most of the series was dedicated to developing the central theme that it ultimately seemed to abandon, or perhaps came across as being burdened with having to carry into the conclusion.

Also it was super fixated on dads, like, The Major is basically Violet’s dad, his best buddy who goes on to hire Violet as a ghostwriter has a big reveal in the end that he’s been writing letters to his hypothetical future child, the sad dad playwright with the dead daughter -- I dunno what to do with all this besides the usual base level of suspicion I have for all dead-heavy content, but yeah!

There’s two movies, a side story from mid-way through the series and a sequel, and I feel like I almost have to watch them at some point, just so I can tie a neater bow on how I experienced this whole story, but yeah, Violet Evergarden, come for the cool metal typing hands, stay for the heartfelt explorations of what it means to love people, shift nervously in your seat when dads suddenly become involved!

[bywhatilove]

Chapter Four of The Friend Trap: Starring KT and Eddie

Things were not gonna do: remember that it’s been a year since i updated this

Nina didn’t want to be someone who ran away from her problems. And she wasn’t, truly. She had stayed after Sarah had sent her on a wild goose chase to find the cup of ankh. She had stayed after finding out she was the chosen one. She had stayed after Senkhara cursed her grandmother and sibuna- the only five people left she was sure she loved. She stayed and she fought.

Nina Martin wasn’t a quitter. She just wasn’t.

And no matter what Fabian or Eddie or anyone else at Anubis House thought of her, she certainly hadn’t quit on them. She had run from her former boarding school, but only to protect her friends. During that summer between junior and senior year, after almost being dragged down to the depths of hell to rule the underworld with Senkhara, the Egyptain Gods began to haunt her even worse than ever before. No longer did they choose to lurk around the dusty halls of Anubis House, but rather popping up during her daily life at home. She would be walking down her neighborhood street when, suddenly, Anubis would be walking next to her, taunting her with her worst nightmares. Like her grandmother dying, the one tether Nina had left to her parents. Or like Fabian or Amber or any of the Sibuna members being hunted down by death before they eventually succumbed. Osiris would plague her dreams, haunting her with images of her and those she loved being tortured in the underworld. Set would whisper tales of disaster running rampant on the earth killing mass numbers of innocent people, and that blood would be on Nina���s hands for not fulfilling her duties as the chosen one. Those were nightmares and curses Nina was determined to bear solely on her shoulders. And, god, it was a terrible year. Not having the rest of sibuna there to keep her morals up was something Nina never realized how much she had taken for granted. She missed Alfie inputting hilarious one liners and breaking up the tension of stress that so often hovered above the group. She missed Patricia, always offering a witty comment that often joked just how much danger they were truly in, while, at the same time, brought a smile to everyone’s face. She missed Amber being the group’s cheerleader who also encouraged everyone with a token of confidence and naive fortune. She missed Fabian being her right hand man and never doubting her, not even when she deserved it. All of that one top of her grandmother still struggling with her health was enough to send a girl right over the edge. And Nina refused to let Sibuna see her so broken and scared. She was supposed to be the strong one, the leader who kept preserving during tough times. But during that year, Nina was no leader. No one knew what the Gods had put her through that year. Not her gran. Not K.T. No one. And Nina was determined it stayed that way because, if anyone knew, then Nina wasn’t sure they would ever be able to look at her the same way.

That was why Nina had stormed out. Not because she was upset to see Fabian and Eddie. Not because she was mad K.T had been lying to her for their entire friendship or that her and Eddie had orchestrated this whole thing (if anything, she was secretly glad they had, but she would never let them know that). But because if anyone could see right through her and eventually get the truth out of her, it would be Fabian. He saw right through her. He always had. And he couldn’t find out what had happened to her that year. That was why Nina sat on a bench outside of the coffee store staring at the busty streets of New York City instead of inside with her friends. Not because she wanted to. She wanted nothing more than to reconnect with those she had left behind. But, she had to hide. She had to stay away from them. It was better for everyone (ok definitely not for her, but for them) even if they couldn’t see it.

Fabian had to be the one who came running after her. It had been that way since Patricia poured milk on her and he found her in the hallway claiming that her tears were due to her allergy to cats. He would always be the one who, no matter how hard she pushed and no matter how stubborn she was, would always come and find her. It may have taken him some time this go-around and it may have only happened due to a little snooping by his friends, but he had found his way back to her. He always would. That was why he had felt so betrayed by Nina when she didn’t return to Anubis House. He thought that the two of them had finally gotten their shit together. He had told her after all… that she was the one.

“Well, my chosen one”

Fabin knew that Nina was the one for him. After all that they had gone through together, truly, how could it be anyone else? Fabin had thought that Nina felt the same way. That was why he had felt so betrayed by her sudden departure. He would have understood if Nina needed to stay behind in the states to care for her gran. After the hell that Senkhara had put her through last year by using her gran’s health as a timepiece to push them to risk their lives, anyone would have understood that Nina needed to stay in the states to care for her gran. All it would have taken was one facetime and Fabian would have understood. Long distance would have been hard, but the two of them had already faced much, much worse. Facing off against a crazy man who was desperate to live forever? Completing life threatening tasks in a 100 year old tunnel created by a man who loved games in order to please an Egyptain ghost ruler? Having to save Nina from being dragged to the underworld by said ghost? The two had fought battles that were far outside the expected challenges of teenage couples. Sometimes it felt like they had led a life and more in their two years together. They had faced everything together, even when things got rough and Nina quit sibuna or when they broke up or when Nina fell down the hole in the senet game. No matter what, Fabin and Nina never gave up on one another. So why had Nina run away and refused to contact any of them?

Fabin saw her sitting on a bench right outside the coffee shop. And even though he hadn’t seen or spoke to her in two years or that he was rightfully pissed at her for falling off the face of the earth, he couldn’t help but still feel butterflies in his stomach at the sight of her. For years, he had dreamed of this very moment. But now that it was here, well he just didn’t know what to say or do.

------------

Call it her chosen one sense or whatever it may be, but Nina knew that someone was behind her and she had a pretty good guess of who it was. The raven haired boy who was her first love, her right hand man and her best friend, the first one she trusted with her secrets- Fabian.

“Hey, Fabian.” She muttered without even turning to face him to confirm that it was indeed him. “I figured you would be the one who ran after me.” She silently chuckled to herself.

“You always were,” she muttered just under her breath for only her to hear.

Fabian came around the bench and took the vacant stop next to her without replying. “Hey,” he finally said after a couple beats of silence.

An awkward silence of a mix of tension and words left unsaid hovered above the pair of estranged best friends. Neither knew where to even start. There was so much to unpack. So much to catch up on. So much to apologize for.

Nina was the first to break it. “I’m sorry,” she stated plainly, not even allowing herself to glance over to Fabian. Instead, she kept her gaze fixated on a stop light across the seat. Green. Yellow. Red.

How nice would it be to be on such a stable routine? She thought to herself. To never have to question which Egyptain god would terrorize you next?

“Don't be,” Fabian shrugged his shoulders. “I’m upset with tweedle-dee and tweedle-dum too for using us as pawns in their Parent Trap game.”

“Yeah…” Nina whispered. “But I am glad to see you again.” For the first time, she looked over at him and allowed a smile to creep over her face.

Fabian returned the smile and just for a fleeting moment everything was alright. It was like just for a moment, they were transported back to a moment when they were two lovesick teenagers hiding crushes on one another. But the magic of that moment was broken just as it had started with Fabian clearing his throat and asking the one question she knew he was bound to ask but she could never answer.

“So, then why did you do it?”

It was like the hustle and bustle of New York City fell silent. Like Victor had just given his award winning speech at 10 p.m every night just before he let his pin drop and silence cursed the halls of Anubis House. (Nina never realized she would miss that annoying speech so much, yet she found herself looking at the clock at 10 pm wishing she was hiding out in her room with Amber as they waited to sneak out). His voice was so calm and collective; yet, somehow, that was worse then if he was yelling.

Nina knew he wasn’t referring to her running off nor was he referring to her not returning to Anubis House. He was mad that she left without any contact but only a letter to explain her sudden departure. That she never heard him out. That she never gave a warning sign. That she left him in exile. That she became a myth, a ghost that haunted him everywhere he went. But she wasn’t ready to give him the true answer to that. She would die with that secret, buried six feet under.

“My gran was sick. You know that.” Nina started out with a simple statement. It wasn’t a lie.

Fabian ran his hand through his hair- his tale-tale sign that he was nervous or frustrated. “I know that, Nina.”

(Nina hated the way he barked out her name. Like it meant nothing more to him than four simple letters, two syllables.)

“But you didn’t have to fall off the face of the earth. You could have called or texted or facetimed. At the very least, you could have told us beforehand that you weren't coming back. You didn’t have to let Mr. Sweet ambush us with the news. Even if you never wanted to see us again, that was the very least you owed us.”

“I never wanted that to happen! You seriously think I wanted to cut off all contact? That I wanted to leave behind the one place that felt like home to me full of people that I loved? That I wanted to leave behind you?” Nina’s voice rose in volume, not with anger but rather with hurt. How could he think that she never wanted to see them again? “Like I said in the letter, seeing you all would have hurt me too much. Even just keeping in contact would have reminded me too much of what I had left behind. It would have changed my mind in an instant and I would have caught the first flight back to England. But I couldn’t do that. I just couldn’t come back.”

“Why not?” Fabian probed. “I know it wasn’t because of that crap you wrote in the letter about the osirian and the chosen one not being in the same place. I know that you can't lie to save your life, Nina, but you could have come up with a better lie than that.”

Nina broke her gaze away from Fabian, which had been glued to him since they began arguing. Lying to him hurt enough already, but she couldn’t look him dead in the eyes and do it. “I told you. My gran was sick. I needed to stay behind and care for her.”

Her words were barely above a whisper, but Fabian heard every word. He shook his head ever so slightly.

“No,” he said as if it were a simple fact. “There is more to it than that. You wouldn’t have put us, put me, through so much pain if it were just because your gran was sick. For whatever reason, there is something that you’re not telling me.”

He got up to leave and head back inside but, before he did, he delivered the words that were the final blow. Words that pierced Nina’s heart right open.

“I thought you trusted me more than that. That after everything we had been through together, that we could tell each other anything. I thought we were stronger than that. But I guess I just really didn’t you all that well after all.”

Nina felt a tear slip down her cheek before the dam broke and the rest followed quickly. Even after she left Anubis House, she never thought she would lose Fabian. Knowing that he was out there, no matter how hurt and mad he was at her, was enough for her. But now she felt like she had lost him for good and she didn’t know if she would ever gain his trust back. After everything, all the curses, all the haunting by egyptain gods, that was her worst fear. And it looked like it may have just come true.

[herstarburststories]

Meet Me In The Church

Kinktober day 18: Threesome

Suptober day 25: Villain

A/N: I know I'm a couple days late in kinktober, but I'll get there. A Very Supernatural Halloween is here! We are starting with @deanmonandnegansbitch 's request!

Pairings: Michael!Dean x reader, Anael x reader, Michael!Dean x reader x Anael

Warnings: fingering, playing with boobs, violence

“So this is your plan? Just go around destroying things until God shows up?” A strident voice reverberated through the abraded church's walls, causing flinch of yours in response. This place was abandoned, and the maps that Alice, your friend, picked up online didn't mention anything about a room underground. Obviously, that only made you follow the stairs towards the noise. “And then what?”

The response came through a velvet voice, “Even God can die.”

You kept walking, the distinguishing sounds of your friends' laughters being replaced by a louder tone of the two unknown people behind the black door in the end of the stairs. You could see a big crucifix, some word craved in it — an old pray, probably.

You should turn around and call your friends. Maybe even the police. Those people were hiding in a secret room. Not that you and your group were right to break in the old church, but it was for fun and not to plan a murder of God. In the bare minimum, the pair was high, drunk, and wasted.

Yet, you kept walking to the black door. Your legs trembling as if some lasting animal instinct in your body knew that wasn't a good idea. But you wanted to know what was happening, give names to the faces and get a story out of them. Where they actually talking about God or were they using nicknames as a gang? Why they wanted to kill God? What happened to get them to the point of arguing about their plan in a church in the middle of Mexico?

You followed their voices like a sailor would follow a siren cry. You just begged to any holy divinity left in the forgotten church not to let you have the same destiny of the sea men.

You were close enough to hear the loud huff, the woman's next words tangled with incredulity. She laughed like she wasn't able to discern if he was kidding or not. “I thought Lucifer was reckless, but you're literally throwing tantrums to get God's attention and then try kill him.”

“Do not compare me to Lucifer.” He almost howled. Your fingers touched the door, pulling it carefully; you knew those sort of building had many noises. You breached, taling a glance inside the place. The room looked old and dusty, except for the two standing there. A woman and a man, just like you pictured from the voices. You were amazed by their apparency. Tall, beautiful, and dominant. You didn't know why, their postures simply exhaled power. “Pay me some respect. Remember that you didn't pick me, I picked you.” An echo of something being thrown against the wall could be heard next, her body was slammed as she was held by her neck. The mam with a hat didn't seem to care. If anything, the cocky grin on his lips reported his clear amusement. The girl put grabbed his arms, gasping a bit. You couldn't just allow that. “I can easily get another angel to do your job if I find you useless like my brother did. His only mistake was to let you live. Lucifer, always such a sentimental.”

Your dry tongue was capable of pushing a word out of your mouth. It was supposed to come out as a warning when you spread the door open, but the quiet unsteady tone beatrayed you. “Hey!”

Both of them turned to stare at the intruder. He threw her body away with ease, green eyes fixated on you. “It seems like we have a guest.”

“You can't just do that to a woman, you abusive asshole.” You said through your teeth, walking to her and getting on your knees. “Are you okay?”

He rolled his eyes at your worry, but the girl seemed to appreciate it: her glossy eyes by the lack of oxygen were wide as they watched you, mouth slightly open in surprise. Anael wasn't used to kindness of any being towards her. In heaven, she was just another angel. On earth, she was sister Jo, humans were nice to her because they wanted to be cured, and the angels were disgusted by how quickly she manipulated her nature to play among the weaker kind.

But not you... You got yourself in the middle of a argument to assist her. Someone you didn't even know!

Anael couldn't help but welcome the weird sensation through her vessel. She felt shy, but st the same time warm. Was this what being cared about felt like?

“She isn't a human, little one. She's just a weak angel trying to make some sense out of her existence by bring closer to a higher being.” Michael's utterly calm tone brought her back to reality. He scoffed, looking up and down at the both of you. “You're right. That sounds a lot like a human.”

“You are crazy.” You hissed, grabbing the other's arm to help her getting up. Your skins tickled each other together. Your eyes were amiable when observating. “You can come with me. My friends are downstairs, we can take you to the police station.”

“You'd be getting ride of a problem for me.” Despite the disinterest, Michael arched an single eyebrow. You weren't the only curious in the church. He wanted to know more. “But fulfill my curiosity: What are you doing here? Why would you help someone you don't even know?”

“We're leaving.” You said, pulling Anael to go with you. Although she was on her feet, she didn't make a move to walk away with you. “We can keep you good. You don't have to stay here with that crazy.”

She didn't want you to die, the first being that showed her kindness somehow, but she knew better than mess with Michael's ego. Anael had teamed up with Lucifer to keep herself safe. She was a survivor. She could adapt anywhere, in any situation. The angel had to do that here too.

“He isn't crazy. We are angels.” She said, eyes glowing white. You pulled away from her hold with a shocked expression, her human skin almost hurt in response.

“Anael is an angel. I'm Michael, the archangel.” He corrected her, smiling proudly at his title. Michael took steps closer to you. “You didn't answer me.”

His green orbs turned bright blue as he glanced at you. One of his tough hands raising to meet your cheek in a singele touch that didn't seem fitting him, at all. That man looked like danger, still you couldn't stop yourself from leaning into his touch. The magnetic pull of something graceful trapped with his gorgeous being.

“I helped her because I thought she needed help.” You answered. “And I came here with a group of friends. We heard about the abandoned church and just came around.”

Michael nodded, a smuh smile on his plump lips.

“Wrong time, wrong place.”

His hand swiftly went to your neck, trace of goshbumps left behind. Anael knew what was coming next; she could take a couple hints, but you were just a fragile human.

“We could use her!” angel attempted to intervene, hoping Michael wouldn't notice the despair in hee voice. Anael wanted more of the emotions you brought out hee vessel, she wanted to be cared for.

“And have another burden to carry?” Michael huffed, his fingers wrapped around your neck as you watched they speaking. God, how did you allow this to happen? “Anael, I keep you around only to have an eye close to the other angels. Why would a human be useful to me?”

“You think to much.” Anael said, her malicious grin exhibiting a confidence she didn't have. “She could be useful for another things.” Her scooted closer to you two, pressing hee body to your side and biting your ear. You pressed your legs together, trying to contain your arousal. But, how could you? He was marvelous and was holding your neck, and she was pressing her against you as if she wanted to make one out of you two.

“Carnal desires.” Michael stated, considering how your body reacted. Interesting but not peculiar, despite Dean's clear positive noise about it. “I'm not my vessel. I do not require sexual activities all the time.”

Anael managed to pull you to her, while Michael pulled away. “You work so hard to make a better world, Michael. You deserve a break.”

You glared at her breathlessly. All your emotions, all your body were a mess for both the victim and the villain; Anael and Michael. You wanted both.

Anael's lips were tingling as she leaned in, ultimately pressing them against yours. It was sloppy, hurried, and a mess. Obviously her first kiss. But that didn't stop her from grabbing your neck and pushing you against the wall.

She wanted more. Anael invaded your mouth with her tongue, whimpered to your taste. You didn't know how to reach at first, but soon your hands were on her hips. Her chest pressed against yours made you whimper, you could feel every inch of her body.

Michael licked his lips as he watched the scene. Dean's mind has a whole section dedicated to such acts, especially videos including more than one woman. The archangel hadn't seen the appeal until you. You and Anael, two puny creatures, were attacking each other only to make him keep you alive.

Anael pulled away from you, the slick in her panties demonstrating exactly what her vessel wanted, what she wanted. You were not far from that, so you didn't protest when she ripped your shirt off. Good day not to wear a bra.

She let out a whimper, eyes full of adoration when she looked at your boobs. Anael just followed what her body wanted to to, guided by her vessel's memories,— in some of them, the woman that once had control on this body was moaning, squirming even for someone called Yas. She'd moan and whine as her partner played with her breasts. — moving foward, her mouth around your nipple as she sucked it.

You shameful loud scream left your body as your pulled her closer to your chest. You eyes were on Michael, how he watched you both like a predator studying his prey. If Anael was so eager, so rough biting and pulling your boob, you couldn't wait to see how Michael would be.

“Michael—” You whined, the fear of his reaction only soaking your panties more. “Please. I need you too.”

Usually, it was easy to descry his emotion's and Dean's. Dean was often a loyal dog, surrounded by selfless feelings and necessity. Now, though, Michael couldn't tell if it was his vessel or himself that let out a hungry groan at your words. All he knew was that he approached to contemplate the way your expression contoured in pleasure.

Your aura was delivered into delight, beautiful noises that reminded him a lot of his enemies falling left your mouth. Your legs pressed together in a silly try for friction catching his attention. Michael slid his hand inside your panties, fingers in a clandestine meeting with your wetness. It was a pleasant situation for him.

The archangel, just like the angel that had went to taste your other boob, craved for what you could give him. It was almost worship, you offering your body as the ancients did before. Michael put a finger inside you, enamored by how you moaned and moved, how your wetness squeezed his digit so good. He couldn't wait to get his hardening cock there.

But first, he needed to do something else. You seemed worthwhile, but he wasn't one for blind faith anymore. Michael pulled his finger to his mouth, licking it.

You tasted divine.

“No carnal desires? Guess your vessel doesn't agree with you.” Anael pulled away from you to provoke Michael, nodding at the hardness in his pants. You winced in protest.

Michael's answer came as a groan: “Shut up or I won't let you touch her anymore.”

You just wanted them to touch you now, after, and forever. You needed them. You were made to be given to them, you knew it in your bones. And then, they did. And you couldn't ever believe you had actually found a purpose.

Leave a comment and REBLOG. Feedback is magic! Tags on my reblog; send me an ask or dm if you wish to be tagged.

[hateyou-butloveyou]

empty relationships all around me, can’t seem to catch a break. a dim light of hope sparks within me when I feel like someone may be what I’ve been looking for. but no. I am unique in the way that no one has completed me even close to what I need yet. not that I’m less without someone, but I haven’t felt a slight bit fulfilled with the people entering and exiting my life. Grief is an everyday emotion for me. I open my heart to ones I seek hope with, instead it leaves room for more hurt. More hurt. disappointment. what am I doing wrong? Is it me? am I on the wrong path? searching for things that simply refuse to be found? it’s not in my hands, it’s in God’s. Yet I’m so angry, so frustrated with the continuous outcomes that come through my life over and over again. am I selfish, stubborn, insecure? Am I looking for the unattainable? Will I ever be satisfied with what comes into my life? Or will I keep searching for something that perhaps will never exist…and I’ll watch as life goes by. And people find what they’ve been looking for all around me, and I’ll feel stuck. stagnant. hopeless. Wondering if it’ll just be me, myself & I on this long hard road called life. I’ve never felt real love. I’ve only had superficial love and adoration. jealous of the things I see all around me, feeling inadequate to all the things they seemingly call real and solid. I am not real, nor solid. I am simply a fixation of what I’ve considered myself for years, who am I really? which side of me do I truly want people to see? I see glimpses of my real self, but it never lasts too long. I’m losing sight of her. The girl who thought she knew what was right all along. yet I wake up every new morning and realize I might’ve been in the wrong this whole time..and I may never find out what’s actually right.

[starrynite7114]

Boots (Angel Reyes)

A/N: Another daddy Angel Request fulfilled! I’m going to make a list of requests just so you all can see if your request is on there or not. If I missed it on accident, please do not hesitate to let me know! 

Thanks for the request Twinnie! 

Enjoy! Happy weekend!

Ahhh there were so many cute options on the list I had such a hard time choosing! Can I please request "Little one playing dress up with a grown-up set of shoes" Thank you so much Twinnie ❤️😘❤️😘

Masterlist

tagged list: @iambabyharry : @justahopelessssromantic : @briannab1234 : @marvelmaree : @carlaangel86 : @everyhowlmarksthedead​  : @trulysuccubus​ : @claytoncardenasbabymama​ : @ifoundmyhappythought​ : @chibsytelford​ : @whyisgmora​ : @jadert15​ : @gemini0410​ : @woahitslucyylu : @thickemadame​ : @elcococruz​ : @agirllovespasta​ : @enamoured-x​ : @encounterthepast​ : @briana-mishell24​ : @sadeyesgf​ : @summertimesadnesswithadashofsass​

Credits to the original owners of the pictures!

Six year old Alena Reyes loved playing dress up. Her favorite article of clothing? Her father’s boots. She wanted to be just like her father when she grew up. It was quite adorable and Angel always loved seeing her walking around with his boots, even though you were worried that Alena would trip and fall. Coco got Alena a dirt bike recently and you knew it was a done deal from there. Angel and Alena always went riding on the weekends, with you and Junior tagging along. Junior was two years old now, so he couldn’t exactly ride with his big sister and father as of yet, but you know eventually, all three of them would be doing it. 

You remembered walking in one day while Alena and Angel were home alone. You had just taken Junior to his check up and found Alena and Angel playing dress up. Alena was Angel and Angel was, well Angel. It was so adorable. Alena had Angel’s mannerisms down to a tee, though you were thankful she didn’t pretend to be smoking like her father. But ever since that day a year ago, Alena’s favorite person to dress up as was a biker or Angel. Before that, she wanted to be a princess, much like most little girl’s, but ever since Angel took her for a ride on his bike, that all changed. 

Walking around the house, you followed Junior as he got the hang of walking. Alena led the way, walking in her father’s boots. She fondly told you that she would be daddy while you played mommy and Junior was the baby. It was very adorable. 

“Come on Junior!” Alena encouraged her younger brother as he followed after her.

“Lena!” He followed after her excitedly. 

You smiled, it was always so nice to see Alena and Junior play together. For some time, you thought you wouldn’t be able to give Alena another sibling. But now, you had two year old Junior and you were currently pregnant, with twins. Angel was hoping they were both girls, since he was a girl dad, whatever the fuck that meant, but it really didn’t matter to him as long as you two had another child. 

It was the biggest blessing and you two couldn’t ask for more.

Angel always wanted a big family and you did as well. The fact you two could have that? 

It was an amazing feeling.

“Alena be careful, you’ve tripped due to daddy’s boots before.” You warned her as she began to run.

“It’s okay mommy, you can fix me. And I’ll have cool scars like daddy” Alena grinned as she continued to run with Junior trying his best to catch up to her. “You’re so slow!” She exclaimed as she slowed her pace, just so her younger brother could catch up to her. “Mommy, Junior is still slow.”

“Lenny, he literally just learned how to walk, give your baby brother a break.” 

Alena thought for a moment before nodding her head in agreement. “You’re right. Come on Junior, give me a hug.” She opened her arms. Junior walked the same pace, but reached his sister and hugged her. 

“Lena!” 

His favorite word to say was ‘Lena’, for his favorite person. And for Alena, just as it has been all these years, Tio Coco was still her favorite person. You watched as Alena fixed Junior’s shirt, which had ridden up due to their embrace. She always wanted to make sure that her baby brother looked good because his big sister always looked good. Alena was such a good older sister, you couldn’t ask for anything more. 

But it wasn’t always perfect. 

Angel was Alena’s person. Junior had mommy and Alena had daddy, plain and simple as that. It was difficult at first as Alena had a hard time sharing Angel’s affections with Junior. She adored her little brother, but Daddy was Alena’s person no matter what. 

Even though Tio Coco was her favorite person. Angel was convinced that Coco must have paid Alena while you two weren’t looking, but you were certain that wasn’t the case. She really adored Coco since she admired Letty. And Coco was Letty’s father. 

“When the twins are born, we’re bound to be their favorite person right?” 

You shrieked, making Angel and Alena laugh. Alena obviously saw her father and didn’t want to bust him when he was trying to scare mommy. 

“Angel!” You smacked his stomach making him groan. “You’re literally going to cause an early birth or something.” You were currently five months pregnant and you honestly couldn’t wait for them to come.

Angel chuckled, wrapping his arms around you. “Sorry mi amor, I couldn’t help it.” He looked at his children, squatting down so they could give him a hug. “Can Daddy get some love?”

“Is Tio Coco with you?” Alena knew how to turn them against one another. She didn’t mean to hurt her father’s feelings, but she knew it bugged him when she would ask for Coco. It became a fun game of poke Angel’s heart. 

“Alena,” you warned her. 

“I’m kidding daddy, you know you’re my favorite person.” She ran to hug him, her previous words already erased from Angel’s mind. 

“Damn right I am.” He waited for Junior who made his way over, when he finally reached him, he let go of Alena and picked up Junior, giving his son a kiss on the cheek. “Look at my boy, next thing you know, you’re going to ride that mini Harley I got you.” 

“No, bikes are our thing!” Alena pouted, crossing her arms over her chest. “He can’t do it, he’s too little.” 

“Sweetie, you all can do it. Wouldn’t it be fun to have Junior with you?” You reasoned with your loveable six year old.

“No, I’m going to be like Daddy when I grow up, see, I’m wearing his boots.” She frowned and you could tell Alena was becoming upset. You wanted to kneel down, but your belly wasn’t really helping out with your flexibility or movement recently. 

Angel frowned as well, squatting down to talk to his baby girl. “Baby, you can still be like daddy when you grow up. You don’t want to share riding with Junior?”

“No, that’s our thing.” She began to sniffle and Angel knew the tears were coming next.

“Mami, it’s okay, riding will be our thing, okay?” Angel handed Junior to you, enveloping Alena in his arms. “It’s still early out, do you want to go out for a ride?”

“Yes!” Alena ran to her room to go change. 

Angel looked at you and smiled. “I just have to cherish the moments where she still likes hanging out with me.”

“Don’t start, we literally have two coming, you will always have someone to spend time with.” You knew Angel was having a hard time with Alena growing up. Alena was his first born and as much as watching her grow was a treat, he knew that someday, it wasn’t going to be like this. Whenever Alena requested for his time, Angel gave it to her. 

“She’s my first born though baby.” He wrapped his arms around you, Junior in between you two. “Next thing you know, she’s going to have a boyfriend and it’s going to be endless fights.” Angel was not looking forward to teenage Alena. She already had so much spunk. The fights were going to be something. 

“Why do you anticipate fights?” You questioned him. Though, you were in agreement with Angel. They most likely will have fights since Alena was Angel through and through. “It’s cause you were such a little shit to your parents, karma is a bitch.” You teased Angel.

“Laugh it up now, you’re going to have a headache too.” Angel narrowed his eyes at you.

“I’m sure I will, but we’re a team, nothing to worry about.” You shrugged before you kissed him.

Junior put his hand in between you two, pushing Angel’s face away.

“Mommy mine,” he declared. 

Angel held up his hands. “Alright little man,” he chuckled. “That ass is going to be mine tonight though.” He grinned mischievously.

“Ignacio!” 

Angel let out a laugh before giving you a quick kiss and making his way down the hall to Alena’s room. When he arrived, he found his daughter with the mini Mayans vest he got her along with a flannel and jeans. She was still wearing his boots making Angel slightly shake his head. 

“Mami, we gotta take those boots off, we’re not playing dress up right now.” Angel picked her up and the boots slipped right off. 

“No! I’m not playing dress up, they’re riding boots.” Alena tried to wiggle her way out of her father’s arms, hoping to put the boots back on.

“Baby, I know, but daddy has a present for you.” Angel carried Alena to your room, sitting her down on the bed. Angel walked over to the closet and took the bag that held Alena’s present. He was going to wait till the weekend, but since they were going out now, he was certain she would want to have it. Taking the box out of the bag, he set it on the bed, sitting on the other side of it while Alena sat on the other side. 

“What is it?” She kneeled, using the box to help her balance. “Is it the Stitch doll I wanted?” Her eyes were fixated on the box, thinking of what her father could have possibly gotten her. “Clothes? The gold bracelet? The headband with the cute bow? Oh, the backpack?!”

“Baby, when did you ever ask for these things?” Angel knew about the stitch doll, but the backpack, headband, bracelet and clothes? No knowledge whatsoever. And you usually told him whenever Alena made a request. 

“Oh, I may have asked Tio Coco and Tio EZ.” She gave him a sheepish smile. “What did you get me?!”

Angel chuckled at his daughter’s enthusiasm. She really did have all the Mayans wrapped around her fingers. He opened the box and Alena’s eyes lit up. 

“They’re your boots! But smaller!” She didn’t want to touch them, they looked so beautiful. “They’re so pretty daddy!”

“They’re for you baby, mommy and I got you riding boots.”

You were by the door, watching father and daughter as you held Junior. You were trying not to cry, but hormones were a bitch and just about anything could make you bawl. 

“Thank you!” She launched herself at Angel, before making her way down the bed and hugging you. “Mommy, why are you crying?”

“They’re happy tears baby.” You assured her. “Come on, go try them on.”

“Okay!”

She climbed back up on the bed, and looked at her father. “Daddy, can you put it on for me?” 

“Of course princesa, I got you.” Angel helped Alena put them on. Once they were zipped up, she jumped down and ran to the full length mirror in your closet. 

“They’re so cool!” She ran back out and the absolute glee on her face made you and Angel’s heart swell. “We’re matching daddy!”

“Yes we are.” He stood up and looked at you. “You two coming?”

“Naw, we’ll stay here. Don’t stay out too late, family dinner tonight.”

“Of course not.” Angel took Alena’s hand. They both gave you a kiss as they made their way out to the truck that held the dirt bikes that the two owned. 

You loved watching Alena and Angel together. He and Alena were two peas in a pod. No matter what, Angel had Alena’s back and Alena had Angel’s back. There were a few times where Alena would side with you, but more often than not, she was Daddy’s little princess. Which made you even more excited to reveal to Angel later that you two were having twin girls. 

Angel was going to have two princesses to play dress up with and of course, his original princess, Alena Reyes. 

[tvandenneagram]

Hamilton Enneagram types

I know that this is mainly a TV blog, but I have loved Hamilton ever since it came out and wanted to type the characters since the ‘film’ came out this week 😊

Alexander Hamilton - 3w4 - 1w2 - 7w8

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Hamilton is the archetypal 3, he is obsessed with raising his station and finding success. Hamilton works tirelessly and never ‘takes a break’ which causes problems with his loved ones. He is fixated on creating a legacy and does not want to go back to the poverty of which he came from. Hamilton is assertive and takes every opportunity he has to succeed. He advises Burr that you get nothing if you wait for it and encourages him to stand up for his beliefs. Towards the end of the musical, he has lost his son and his career, making him more unhealthy. During this time he is withdrawn, listless and shows little motivation (disintegrating to 9). 

Key lyrics:

“Hey yo, I'm just like my country I'm young, scrappy, and hungry. And I'm not throwing away my shot”

“I probably shouldn't brag, but dag, I amaze and astonish”

“Will you relish being a poor man’s wife. Unable to provide for your life?”

“As a kid in the Caribbean I wished for a war. I knew that I was poor. I knew it was the only way to rise up! ... If they tell my story I am either gonna die on the battlefield in glory or rise up!”

Eliza (about Hamilton): “You and your words obsessed with your legacy. Your sentences border on senseless. And you are paranoid in every paragraph how they perceive you”

Aaron Burr - 9w1 - 3w2 - 5w6

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Burr always keeps his stances on different issues ‘close to his chest’ because he doesn’t want to say something that can be used against him. He does have values and feelings, he just isn’t open with his feelings and doesn’t say anything to keep the peace. In the later part of the play, Burr begins to show his ambition more openly and begins to campaign for president. He starts to take more initiative and tries to be more like Hamilton and take what he wants rather than ‘waiting for it’. As Burr gets into the lower levels of health, he becomes paranoid like a 6 as we can see in “The Room Where It Happens.” When Hamilton supports Jefferson for the presidency, Burr becomes vengeful and challenges Hamilton to a duel. He does not understand why Hamilton would support his enemy over his friend, when all Burr is trying to do is take Hamilton’s advice. Burr is ultimately very jealous of Hamilton, as he believes that Hamilton gets everything he wants by taking it. Burr’s style of lying in wait directly contrasts Hamilton’s more assertive nature and deep down he wishes he was more like Hamilton.

Key Lyrics:

“I'm not standing still, I am lying in wait”

“Talk less. Smile more. Don’t let them know what you’re against or what you’re for”

“What is it like in his shoes? Hamilton doesn't hesitate. He exhibits no restraint. He takes and he takes and he takes and he keeps winning anyway.”

“I’ll keep all my plans close to my chest (wait for it, wait for it). I’ll wait here and see which way the wind will blow. I’m taking my time watching the afterbirth of the nation, watching the tension grow”

“I am slow to anger, but I toe the line as I reckon with the effects of your life on mine”

“I wanna be in the room where it happens”

Eliza Schuyler - 9w1 - 2w1 - 6w7

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Eliza is kind-hearted, caring and naive. She is shy, but she is fiercely loyal to her loved ones. She has a tendency to go with the flow and is very easily influenced. Eliza is deeply trusting and tends to take what Hamilton says at face value. It seems that she is naive to Hamilton’s intentions to raise his station and to his later affair. She is helpless when it comes to Hamilton and hangs on his every word. Eliza wants Hamilton to give her more attention and show her more affection. She wants to show him that there is more to life than creating a legacy. Eliza is very forgiving and when their son dies, she shows Hamilton the ultimate compassion by forgiving him. In her later life she becomes more of an activist and speaks out against slavery as well as establishing an orphanage to help children. 

Key lyrics:

“I have never been the type to try and grab the spotlight”

“I'm erasing myself from the narrative. Let future historians wonder how Eliza reacted when you broke her heart”

“We don’t need a legacy. We don’t need money. If I could grant you peace of mind. If you could let me inside your heart…”

“I stop wasting time on tears I live another fifty years It’s not enough”

Angelica (about Eliza):  “I know my sister like I know my own mind. You will never find anyone as trusting or as kind”

Angelica (about Eliza): “ If I tell her that I love him she’d be silently resigned. He’d be mine. She would say, “I’m fine”. She’d be lying.”

Company: “Forgiveness. Can you imagine?” 

Angelica Schuyler: 6w7 - 1w2 - 2w3 

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Angelica was very hard to type, we were stuck between 1 and 6 because she is very, very compliant. One of her defining characteristics is her self-sacrificing nature and devotion to her sister. Angelica values duty and tries to do what is right for her family. When she meets Hamilton, she is able to correctly deduce that he wants to be with her because of her family’s social status. Despite feeling an instant attraction to him, she sets him up with Eliza instead because (as the oldest) she has to fulfill her father’s expectations and marry into society. Angelica is also extremely loyal to Eliza and her family, as most of her actions are in service to them. When she returns from London, she reacts aggressively to Hamilton as he betrayed Eliza. 

Key Lyrics:

“I’m a girl in a world in which my only job is to marry rich. My father has no sons so I’m the one who has to social climb for one”

“He’s after me cos I’m a Schuyler sister. That elevates his status, I’d have to be naive to set that aside”

“In a letter I received from you two weeks ago I noticed a comma in the middle of a phrase. It changed the meaning. Did you intend this?”

“Some men say that I’m intense or I’m insane. You want a revolution? I want a revelation - so listen to my declaration”

“And when I meet Thomas Jefferson Imma compel him to include women in the sequel”

George Washington - 1w9 - 6w7 - 3w2

Washington has very strong principles which manifest in his efforts for the revolution. He has a tendency to dwell on his past mistakes and feels deep shame over them. Washington takes Hamilton under his wing and wants to show him the wisdom that he has learned throughout his life. He remains true to his convictions and fights for what he believes in. Washington abdicates his presidency because he knows that it is the right thing for the nation. He understands that for the nation to move forward there needs to be different leaders and viewpoints. Washington wants his address to inform of the wisdom he gained from leading the country and help advise America’s future leaders.

Key lyrics:

“I made every mistake. I felt the shame rise in me and even now I lie awake knowing history has its eyes on me”

“Dying is easy, young man. Living is harder”

“Pick up a pen, start writing. I wanna talk about what I have learned. The hard-won wisdom I have earned”

“Can I be real a second? For just a millisecond? Let down my guard and tell the people how I feel a second? Now I’m the model of a modern major general the venerated Virginian veteran whose men are all lining up, to put me up on a pedestal, writin’ letters to relatives, embellishin’ my elegance and eloquence”  

[heybeaniefrog]

Begin Again: Rengoku/Fem!Tanjiro

Summary:  "A Hashira eating his own student. How comical!” Akaza grins. It falters. “Or the blood will prove to be too much for him and he’ll die. That’d be a shame. But he’s strong,” the grin returns in full, “So I have faith in him.” Faith. She felt sick. Akaza turns, and in a low voice says, “I can’t wait to see how strong you become, Kyojuro.” Or, an AU scenario where Rengoku becomes a demon instead of dying. Fem!Tanjiro witnesses his transformation and is faced with choices.

Pairing: Rengoku Kyojuro/Fem!Kamado Tanjiro Rating: T for moderate but emotionally charged violence! No swears here. Genre: Angst, AU Word Count: 3,340

Note: Fem!Tanjiro is referred to as Tanjiro and not Tanko. Feel free to read this fic however you like best.

...

Not again. It couldn’t happen again. Nezuko is one of the very few known cases in human history of anyone becoming a demon and mastering their instinctual hunger for humans. She is an exception. Aside from her, the rule still applied that all who transformed into a demon would have to be slain. Without reservation, without question. Tanjiro swallowed, a sick feeling growing in her stomach. It felt like a rock of dread. She became aware of her sweat growing cold on her skin. She forces herself to blink, and re-steadies her grip on her sword. She had been numbly staring at what was happening in front of her. Look, Tanjiro. Look. Do not look away now. Her master is on his knees, writhing on the ground. Behind him, Akaza watches with delight. His lips curled into a wide smirk, his eyes crescents. The blood had stopped running down his neck. The wound must already be healing. He’s chuckling as the Flame Hashira keeps shaking, doubled over on his knees gasping and gagging as the demon blood was taking effect. Coursing through his veins, corrupting his body, defiling his mind. His mouth is open, jaw clenched trembling and remaining eye open wide but seeing nothing. His breathing is ragged and inconsistent, and he’s shaking violently. Akaza’s laughter grew louder in delight as the Hashira’s sharp sobs grew. Fight, Rengoku-san. Fight! Fight! Tanjiro begs in her mind. She hated to see him in such agony. Her heart clenched. Her hands were stiffening around her sword, but she couldn’t falter now. “Fight, Rengoku-san! Don’t become a demon! Please… … I know you can do it,” She manages to say, though inwardly she’s unsure. The chances of Rengoku overcoming the demon blood with his mind intact were slim to none. Still, she thinks, forcing down panic. I must believe in him. I must believe that he can do it! If Nezuko could do it, Rengoku-san can do it. No matter how hard it is. He’s the iron-willed Hashira who taught me. Taught me to never do things halfway. To set my heart aflame. I can’t give up on him. Even if… His head snaps up. Instead of the kind, bright eyes Tanjiro knew, slit red eyes glared back at her. Bloodshot, they were furious, piercing, and showed no recognition. His lips are curled wide, showing large pointed teeth and fangs. A low rumbling growl comes from his throat. She flinches. Her blood runs cold. “I’ll leave this to you,” Akaza says, still laughing as he turns away. “Though I’d love to see how this pans out. When he eats you as you struggle and scream. Maybe you’ll just stand there like a baby rabbit and get devoured. Maybe you’ll fight and he’ll disembowel you as you say his name. Or maybe he’ll tear your limbs apart as you try to reason with him. What’s left of him. What you think is left. A Hashira eating his own student. How comical!” He grins. It falters. “Or the blood will prove to be too much for him and he’ll die. That’d be a shame. But he’s strong,” the grin returns in full, “So I have faith in him.” Faith. She felt sick. Akaza turns, and in a low voice says, “I can’t wait to see how strong you become, Kyojuro.” He crouches as if to run. “Coward!” Tanjiro shouts, regaining her voice. He pauses and turns. “If you’re so eager to see, why don’t you stay and watch? Why are you running?” She grits her teeth, glaring at him. He returns her gaze and grins again, showing her his own sharp teeth, and Tanjiro wants to rip that look off his face. “Easy. Because I know how this is going to end,” he says as he looks up to the lightening sky, “and I have other things to attend to. Duty calls, you see. And I can’t fulfill my duty if I’m dead.” He turns away again. “Speaking of,” He says, looking back at her out the corner of his eye, “I’m not the only demon here who’ll be killed when the sun comes up. “You better figure out what you’re gonna do, Demon Slayer.” With a last bark of laughter he takes off running for the woods. She grimaces. He can’t get away, not like that! After all that has been lost. After everything… “This isn’t over, Akaza!” She screams at his retreating back. “I know it’s not. I’ll see you then,” Is his reply, echoing back to her as he disappears. Her bravado and adrenaline draining from her, Tanjiro allows herself to fall to her knees. “I swear you’ll pay for this,” She says, voice breaking and trailing off into silence. She releases her clenched grip on her sword. Only now she finds her eyes welling with tears. She hardly feels them. “I swear…” Movement in front of her. She raises her head. Somewhere in her spat with Akaza Rengoku had gone limp and silent, as though transforming and glaring at her had exhausted his energy. Now, however, she finds him fixated on her. His violent shaking has lapsed into a tense vibration, like the train they’d rode on pulling from the station, or a fox about to pounce on a mouse. His eyes, which had been ringed in yellow and red, were now like hot embers, intensely red, almost glowing. In the low light of the early morning she could see the reflection of his eyes, like a cat. Or a wild animal. Or a demon. Wait. Eyes? Two eyes? He’s pounced and is in her face before she could think. Regripping her sword she swings at him, knowing it’ll miss. Faster than she could see he dodges her swing and uses the opening to grip her by the shoulder and throat and knock her heavily into the dirt. His weight hits her like a mountain of bricks, knocking her breath out of her lungs, sight blurring from the force. Crap, crap, crap! She thrashes, avoiding his snapping jaws, the clashing sharp teeth. The delicate skin on her neck tingled and recoiled instinctively. When he was human, Rengoku-san was so much faster and stronger than me. Now… With great effort she maneuvers her blade under his arms and braces it between them. As a demon… His eyes are burning holes into her. She shrinks from them and pulls her knees up as a barrier in an attempt to maintain distance. He’s so much bigger and stronger than her, his claws tear at her shoulders. How could I possibly beat him? He snaps at her, but her black blade is braced against his neck. His weak spot. Past his head she sees the sky, with hints of light blue. There’s dull orange in the sky beyond the far trees. Is this it? The end? He rages against the blade, and it cuts his neck, red running along the edge. He’s salivating, running down his chin. His golden hair is a mess, a wildfire framing his face and forehead. She winces. He’s tightly gripping the blade with one hand and her arm with the other. It can’t be. Not like this. The shaking has returned with full force, and her master’s wild eyes shake erratically, not focusing. Veins strain for freedom against his skin. He hisses and snarls, growl grating against her ears. He was loud, frighteningly loud. Tanjiro’s instincts screamed to escape. Despite years of training and fighting demons, this presence in front of her was different. It shook her to the bone. Because this was someone she trusted. Someone who trained her, took care of her, who nurtured her skill and spirit like a growing flame. Someone she loved dearly. Would she have to slay him? (Could she slay him?) No. Not again. It couldn’t happen again. Not another person she loved and who loved her. She couldn’t lose one more person. His grip tightens and a crack and pain shoots up her arm. She screams and jerks the blade. She didn’t have to slay Nezuko. She didn’t kill her sister. But a demon with Rengoku’s strength and skill would kill many. Could kill many. He shatters her blade as she kicks him as hard as she can in the chest. She scrambles to regain her footing, cradling her broken arm, but he’s leapt at her and closed the distance. Her heart runs cold again. The tears come. °°° “Kamado, my girl. What’s on your mind?” The Flame Hashira finds his tsuguko on the back step of the Slayer headquarters, looking out at the gardens and wisteria trees on the estate. She’s sitting cross-legged, her haori and pleated skirt pooling around her knees with the breeze murmuring through her maroon hair. Eyes half-closed, Tanjiro Kamado was deep in thought, looking to be half-asleep, when at his voice she opens her eyes and looks up. “Mmm, Rengoku-san. I guess…” she looks down at her hands. “I guess I’ve been thinking a lot…” He sits down next to her, mimicking her position. She meets his gaze, and his sharp attentive eyes wait patiently. “…about demons and memories. And if you’re the same person after you transform. If demons still remember and feel love.” She looks back to see his raised eyebrow, but no other reaction. She then quickly realizes, “Well, of course Nezuko remembers and loves me, at least somewhat. And Urokodaki-san told her to treat all humans like family, and she treats them so well so she must love her family still.” She waves her hands. A moment passes as she gathers her thoughts. A breeze blows, rustling her haori and his flame-patterned robe. He shakes his head slightly to get golden hair out of his eyes. His eyes never leave her face. “Rengoku-san,” she looks ahead, “when a demon dies, all their memories die with them, right?” He’s the one who now looks out at the garden. “I suppose they do. However, until recently I did not consider that demons could have memories that would truly affect the way they behave. No memories of any value would change them or their demon nature. All memories would do for them would fuel their killing and eating of humans, perhaps expressed in different ways. It would do nothing for them whether they remember or not. I thought they were nothing more than insatiable animals. Nothing more, nothing less.” He turns to look at her. “Or so I thought.” She turns to meet his eyes. The bright dots in his pupils danced at her. He has a small smile. “However, Nezuko has changed my mind! That girl’s conviction, even in the face of Shinazugawa’s marechi blood forced me to reconsider what I thought I knew about demons. How starved she must have been, with how he provoked her and still she refused to attack him. The way, too, that she treats all humans with kindness confirmed that.” His smile is warm now. “The way she insists on brushing your hair and protecting you in battle. The way she treasures your family’s heirloom earrings. Surely she does so because she loves you and remembers her family. Maybe not in the exact same way as before. After all, demon transformation inevitably changes some things about the person. But Nezuko without a doubt loves you, and she remembers. But you know these things. Better than I do, surely.” She returns his smile with a smile of her own, her garnet eyes softening. “I guess so.” She looks back at her hands. “It’s… nice to hear it from someone else. That I’m not just telling myself what I want to hear. That it’s real to others too.” Rengoku nods his head. Humans all need reassurance, need a confidant. It was only natural, for such finite and limited creatures to need comfort. He could understand that. “… … … Rengoku-san?” “Yes, my girl?” She looks up at him. There’s a conflicted expression on her face now, knitted brows and pursed lips. He blinks and holds her gaze. “When we die… as humans… will our memories die with us?” He blinks again. “I suppose they do. If they’re not written down or shared with others, there won’t be anyone to carry on memories or wills or oaths made.” He waves a hand in the air. “Perhaps every event is written down in some great book of history, of all words said and all things done. However, I don’t think anyone knows if such a thing exists.” He looks at her. “Nor whom may have the privilege of reading it.” She looks pensive. “Then…” He smells calm, open, inviting. His usual scent of rain-watered soil and campfire had a warm edge, beckoning gently. Hesitant, she scoots close to him, leaning her head against his left arm. Her eyes are on the floor. “Sensei, I don’t want to forget.” She looks up now, and her eyes glisten. “I don’t want to forget my family, my sister, our struggles, the friends and demons and their stories we’ve met along the way. I don’t want to forget Urokodaki-san and Tomioka and the Hashira and all the other Slayers. I don’t want them to be forgotten. Even the demons.” The tears swell in her eyes. “I don’t want them to disappear.” They look at each other for a long moment, until her sensei reaches, pulling her to his side and wraps his arm around her shoulders. She nestles into his side. His thumb rubs circles into her shoulder. Her face grows warm. She buries it in his uniform. °°° He has her backed against a tree, still wrestling for control. Claws carve ruthless tracks into her flesh, but Tanjiro keeps fighting for each inch of space she has. He strikes for her throat but she meets him halfway with her forehead, the cracks of impact resonating through the forest. Her lungs burn, and it was getting harder and harder to counter each attack. Fatigue from the exhaustive night weigh down her every move, but Rengoku’s eyes are as fierce as ever, and his saliva is dripping onto the dirt between them. He’s hungry. Ravenous. He’s going to eat me. But wait. Something is strange, Tanjiro realized. If he wanted to kill me, he would have done so by now. Easily. Why? Why hasn’t he? He was fighting. That, or the transformation really took a toll on his strength. But no, she chooses to believe the former. He was fighting the urge to eat, to devour. Even in this level of violence he was showing restraint. Her own strength was almost gone. Knees shaking. Arms burning. He dodged her forehead and thrust his head next to hers in between her chin and collarbone. “Rengoku-san, please. Please.” She pleads. She can hardly see from the tears now blurring her vision. His mouth was open, fangs bared. They could wrap completely around her throat. Were his ears listening? Would her words reach him? “Please stop. “You said…” The words catch in her throat. It’s almost too much to bear. Say it. You must. There’s no other time to say this. “… you said you didn’t want to forget who you are and who you love.” He pauses, shaking, jaws trembling from tension. His breath spreads down her neck. “You are Rengoku Kyojuro. You love your family. You love Senjuro and your father. You love humans and the beauty of human life. You love protecting the ones who can’t protect themselves.” The first sob breaks. “You don’t want to be a demon. “You might be a demon now, but you don’t have to eat me. You don’t have to eat humans. Fight, Rengoku-sensei. You’re the strongest person I know. Fight, and you can overcome the urge, I know you can. I believe in you. I have faith in you. So please,” Her voice breaks. “Rengoku Kyojuro.” Last words. She reaches for his face, cradling in her numb unbroken hand. “Please. Let’s go back together.” She loses strength in her legs and crashes onto her knees again. “Let’s go back.” He kneels, rests his forehead against hers. His eyes are glossy now and half-closed, still unfocused and pupils blown. She notices tears now slowly tracing down his face. They breathe. It didn’t end, she realized. As the Kakushi were dressing and wrapping her wounds, she rested against a different tree and looked up at the pale blue-yellow morning sky through the trees, color gentle as birdsong. It didn’t end here. She turns her head, seeing Rengoku lying in the deep shade of the underbrush, safe from the first rays of sunlight. His head lolls to one side, his eyes closed, sleeping. His bangs which he combs away from his face now cover his forehead and brows in a messy but surprisingly endearing fashion. Cute, she realized. A Kakushi member was fitting him with a gag to sate his teeth and another securing his limbs for transport back to the Slayers’ estate. They had brought a large basket suspended on parallel bamboo rods, not unlike the basket Tanjiro first made for Nezuko, to carry the Flame Hashira in. If he still held that title. That would be determined upon his arrival. For now, Tanjiro thinks with a sigh as the Kakushi pack them up for the journey back, please rest. °°° “Rengoku-san, I don’t want to forget you. “I don’t want to forget you training me and the boys, or the times we raced, or eating meals with you. Or the times you showed me how to care for my sword. Or the time the Hashira had an arm-wrestling competition and we all had fun betting on who would win. Or the time you cooked with Mitsuri and ruined the oven.” He rests his chin on the top of her head, and his warmth radiates into her hair. With her ear against his side, she could both hear and feel his response. “If we both remember, it will not fade. All things come to an end, but those memories will live in our hearts and the hearts of those we share them with. Take heart, Tanjiro. “I will treasure these memories as long as I live.” He doesn’t see her smile a pure, sincere smile, but he hears it. Her tears wick away into his uniform. “I will too.” °°° The thought that moments like that would disappear if she died shook Tanjiro’s heart. It felt as though pieces of the tense stone that wrapped her heart were crumbling. The Kakushi who carried her on her back moved silently besides the two Kakushi carrying Rengoku’s basket, all hiking through the forest wordlessly. She felt raw, but there was no one to probe, so she sighed and allowed herself to relax her heart, to feel raw and real and open. The stress leached out of her like poison dissipating into the warm forest air. The birds were singing. She hazily woke from a nap on the Kakushi’s back, still walking. They entered a sun-lit clearing and Tanjiro felt the golden light of the sun warm her cheeks and filter through her lashes. Again, someone close to her had turned into a demon. Again they had attacked her, and again this person had fought the desire to eat her and won. She seemed pretty lucky. Turning her head towards the basket, she rests her head back down on the shoulders of the woman carrying her and thinks. She watches it shift slightly as they move through the shadows of the trees. Rengoku-san, we can never go back to those days. Things have changed now. They will never be the same. I don’t know what the others will think or say. But I know…when they see your devotion, your conviction, who you still are, The steps beneath her lull her mind, sleep beckoning to her. They’ll know you are still Rengoku Kyojuro. Worthy of being called the Flame Hashira. A friend. Everything will be okay. I know it will. She closes her heavy eyelids. I believe it. ...

Author's Note: I'm aware that Muzan's blood is the only thing that can turn people into demons. This fic intentionally leaves how Rengoku receives his blood ambiguous. Let's say Akaza carried a vial of Muzan's blood! ;-)

Author's Note 2: I wrote this fic over the course of 14 hours when I woke up early in the morning and had the urge to write something. I finally had the courage to make it happen. I know some verb tenses are a little wonky, but I hope you can still enjoy it. Constructive feedback is welcome! This is my first fic, please be gentle. Hope you enjoy!

Author's Note 3: Lol last note, because why not? If it interests you at all, the music I was listening to while writing this fic: SM the Ballad – Breath (JP. ver.): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=25IfYq_DbzE Oh My Girl – Nonstop: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iDjQSdN_ig8 Sayonara Wild Hearts – full album: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mf0fHupqjIM

[flutteringphalanges]

                                    Caught in a Riptide

Summary: After the infamous Count Dracula is discovered and taken into custody by the Jonathan Harker Foundation, former nun and now guardian to her young niece, Zoe, Agatha Van Helsing is tasked with keeping tabs on the vampire after a mishap leads to his release into modern day society. Can Agatha remain levelheaded, or will fate turn her onto a new path?

Pairing: Dracula/Agatha Van Helsing

Rated: M

Read on FFN and AO3

A/N: Ah, what a way to finish the first school week--a brand new chapter! I hope you enjoy! I am pleased by how long it is! Feedback is greatly loved and appreciated--reblogs too! My brain is mush so now I shall go an Netflix! Enjoy! -Jen

                                                   Chapter Eight

"Why can't I come?"

The seven year old glowered at her aunt as Jack moved around in the kitchen retrieving the ingredients needed to make slime. Normally creating such a monstrosity would've excited the child, as Agatha usually forbade the stuff in the house, but Zoe seemed more concerned about the woman's agenda with the vampire. After all, she found Dracula fascinating. A potential friend-though, not truly understanding what he really was.

"It's a trip for adults." Agatha sighed, grabbing her purse. "Besides, you get to visit with Jack. You're always talking about him coming over."

"Yeah." Zoe replied, hands on her hips. "But he's not Mr. Dracula."

"Zoe, that's very rude." Her aunt chided-but thank god for that. "You apologize to Jack now."

"Sorry." She muttered under her breath, rubbing her feet against the floor. "But can't I come with you, please?! I promise to be good! 'Sides, Mr. Dracula is new here! What if he gets lost? He might need my help!"

"He won't and he certainly doesn't need anything from you." Agatha realized the harshness in her tone and inhaled. "Zoe, listen to me." She bent down to meet her niece at eye level. "You'll have more fun here with Jack. Mr. Dracula…" Her nose scrunched at the name. "And I have business to attend to. It'll be very boring, I guarantee it."

"And I brought glitter." Jack added, smiling as he picked up a tiny, sparkling container. "It's rainbow!"

"Just try not to get it everywhere." Agatha snorted, pecking Zoe on the cheek. "Have fun you two and don't get slime on my furniture. It took forever to get out last time."

"Okay, Aunt Aggie." The little girl exhaled. "I love you! Tell Mr. Dracula I said hi!"

"I love you too." The woman replied, knowing very well she wouldn't be fulfilling her niece's wishes on the second part. "Be good for Jack."

She tried not to think about how big of a mess her kitchen would be in when she returned. However, all concerns about that immediately dissipated the moment she stepped outside. There, standing on the curb, was none other than Dracula himself. He gave her a toothy grin as he opened the passenger door. Agatha's eyes flickered to the driver's seat where Frank Renfield gave her a nervous smile and a quick wave. There was no way in Hell. Not a single, solitary way in the underworld she'd be getting in a car with him where she wasn't in control of the vehicle.

"I thought it would be best if we had a chauffeur." The vampire explained, motioning for her to get in. "That way we can get to know each other even more." He chuckled and gave a small shrug. "Not to mention he knows his way around just as much as you do. Now we don't have to worry about you being distracted when we drive."

"I didn't agree to this." Agatha replied firmly, folding her arms. "Any of this."

"Oh come now, Sister Agatha." The Count called out smugly. "Live a little-well, one of us has to."

Just the very look of Frank's expression sent chills down her back. He wasn't a threatening man, at least in a physical sense, but something about him didn't settle right. And it didn't help that there was a valid reason that this had been constructed alongside Bloxham. At least she wasn't the driver, everything was unbearable enough as it was.

"Fine." The woman resigned. "But we stick to the approved locations, no detours." Now that she thought of it, she hadn't exactly gotten the list of places they were going. "Just get in so we can get this night over with."

"Ladies first." The vampire bowed, motioning for Agatha to step inside. She knocked purposely hard into his shoulder as she climbed in. His mouth twitched into a sneer as he slid in beside her, much to her discomfort. "I think we're ready to go to our first stop." His eyes met those of the former nun. "The Prospect of Whitby!"

Agatha barely acknowledged Frank's sheepish greeting as she stared with great fixation out of the window. She could feel Dracula watching her, waiting for her to finally turn around and address him. But her attention remained glued to the trees and cars that zoomed by as they drove into the inner, more populated part of the town.

"I thought you could use some dinner." The vampire suggested, finally breaking through the silence. "And during my research as well as Frank's recommendations," he nodded to the driver. "This seemed like the perfect location. Did you know tavern itself claims to be the oldest around dating back to around 1520? Fascinating that such a place could possibly be nearly a century younger than me."

"Just because I'm forced to keep an eye on you doesn't mean I'm interested in the history of my basket of fish and chips." She retorted. "And I'm not hungry."

"Nevertheless, we're going in." The vampire stated as Frank pulled up to the curb. "Mr. Renfield, if you'll just wait out here with the car."

"Oh!" The lawyer spoke up softly. "I thought it would be alright if I came in and…"

"Your presence is not needed nor wanted." The Count exclaimed with a dismissive wave. "Come, Agatha, we have a table for two reserved."

If given the choice of publicly eating a meal in front of Dracula or stepping through a hallway of hot coals, legos, and thumb tacks, the last option sounded far more appealing. She didn't take the vampire's hand as he held it out towards her, merely exiting the car and slamming the door roughly behind her. A small part of her felt bad for Frank, a part that felt guilty that he was roped into this night. But the bigger part of her blamed him and she secretly hoped something would happen whilst they were inside.

"Vlad Balaur."

Agatha internally groaned as Dracula grinned at the hostess causing her to blush. If she really knew what she was, that flattered expression would've morphed into one of horror. She sucked in her cheeks as she followed the young woman to a small table with rather intimate lighting.

"Oh, we only need one menu." The vampire explained to the lady. "We're here for her. I have...allergies." And when he spoke, his eyes were fixed on the innocent hostess's jugular. Agatha kicked him hard under the table causing his attention to travel back to the woman's eyes. "Yes, just one will do."

"You're disgusting." Agatha hissed under her breath as the woman walked away.

"So you're telling me that if you saw a divine burger you wouldn't salivate?" Dracula countered.

"What does a burger have to do with anything?!" She replied almost flustered. "And...and it's not like it's still breathing." Frowning, she snatched up the menu and pretended to read it. "How long are you going to force me to sit here before we can go?"

"Until you order something." The man replied simply. "I'll pay, of course."

"This isn't a date!" She snapped, firmly setting the menu down. "So don't act like it is!"

"I wouldn't dream of it." The corners up his lips twitched in slight amusement. "But I am humored that the thought even came to your mind."

Before Agatha could retaliate, a waiter approached the table. The former nun exhaled softly through her nose and straightened up in her chair. Better not lose it in the middle of a crowd. Bloxham would have her head and Dracula would most certainly enjoy that.

"Can I start you off with anything?" The man asked, looking between the two. "Might I recommend the fish and chips? We are known for having the best in Whitby. Fresh cod caught today!"

An interesting thought came to Agatha's mind. An idea she didn't consider until now. Forcing a smile, she picked up her menu once more. Dracula had offered to pay after all. Who was stopping her from ordering the most expensive items available?

"I'll have the eight ounce sirloin." She read out loud, her eyes scanning the drink section. "And the Champagne Lallier Grand Cru Grande Réserve Brut-the full bottle." Agatha grinned at the waiter as she handed the menu back. "Thank you."

The man nodded and disappeared, leaving the two alone once more. Feeling rather proud of herself, Agatha leaned back a little in her seat as the vampire watched her with great interest. Clearly, it had been a move he hadn't expected. Check mate.

"I thought you didn't drink?" Dracula inquired, a brow raised in surprise.

"I don't." The former nun smirked. "But you offered to pay and I thought it'd make for a nice centerpiece."

"Well played, Agatha Van Helsing." The vampire chuckled, causing the woman to frown a little. "It's not often that I'm surprised. A shame though for such an expensive bottle to go to waste. What, pray tell, do you plan to do with it if you aren't going to drink it?"

"I don't tell my enemies my ideas." She replied, folding her arms. "But I can think of a few things." A thought flickered in her mind for a brief second of her bashing the bottle against the wall and using it as a makeshift stake. "I suppose I'll keep it with me for a special occasion. For now."

"Until then," the vampire answered. "I shall wait with bated breath."

Not long after the wine discussion, Agatha's meal was brought from the kitchen. As much as she hated to admit it, the smell was heavenly. She thought back to the hostess and wondered if that's what Dracula meant by divinely appetizing. The former nun stared at her steak and tried her best to will herself against consuming it. But oh how it smelled so heavenly.

"The last thing I'd wish to do is make you feel uncomfortable by you eating alone while I merely watch." Dracula exclaimed. "But I think you'd prefer that over me joining you in my own matter."

Absentmindedly, the former nun picked up her fork and poked at the juicy meat. Tender. Cooked to perfection. There was a reason this place had lasted for centuries. Slowly, she cut herself a small piece and pushed it past her lips. Then another. And another.

"A glass of wine to go with that?" Dracula smirked.

Agatha merely frowned around her utensil and continued to eat until there was nothing left. Wiping her mouth with her napkin, she set it upon the empty plate. Maybe she'd take Jack or Mrs. Avery here some time to thank them for watching Zoe. For now, she dreamed of nothing more than leaving the damn place. Whether or not it was her imagination, the lights seemed to be dimming around them.

"I'm glad to see you mostly enjoyed your meal." Dracula commented as he flagged the waiter down. "I'll pay, as promised. Perhaps next time you can pick the restaurant?"

As her fingers gripped the neck of the bottle, Agatha had to refrain from bashing the thing on top of the vampire's head. Not surprisingly, Frank was still seated out front in the car just as they had left him. A light drizzle began to spill from the sky and Dracula miraculously produced an umbrella. He held it out towards Agatha who immediately rejected it. Rolling his eyes, the man found his place in the car beside her.

"So we went to a historic tavern." Agatha exhaled, looking to the vampire. "Is that not enough of an adventure for you for one night?"

"Not quite." Dracula admitted. "I said I had an itinerary, Agatha. I really did mean it." He could see the look of detest on her face. "Alright, for you, I will compromise. I just ask that we go to two more places and then we'll call it a night. Do we have an agreement?"

"I don't suppose I really have a choice in the matter." The former nun exhaled in defeat. "Fine, two more places, then you're taking me home and leaving me be." However long that would last.

"Sounds reasonable enough." The vampire nodded. "Frank, if you would."

The rain began to fall harder as the pair, along with their driver, drove in awkward silence. Out of the corner of her eye, Agatha noticed Dracula fiddling with some app on his phone. As he continuously swiped his index finger across the screen, her curiosity got the better of her.

"What are you doing?" She inquired, craning her neck to get a better look. "Is that...is that a dating site?!"

"Well, I suppose if one chose to use it as such it could be." The vampire replied simply, locking his phone. "But from what I've learned it can be used for other reasons."

"You mean sex." And her nose crinkled at the thought of him screwing anyone. "If you're…"

"I'm not, nor do I plan to." His eyes flickered up to the rearview mirror where Frank stared back at him intently. "At least for awhile. I understand the rules. However, there is nothing in the bylaws that says I can't at least explore my options. Whether they be sexual or flavorful." The vampire's lips curved into a suggestive smile. "Temptation is one of the greatest sins, Agatha. But I am sure as a nun you are well aware of that. Or...rather were."

"Well, your account will be tracked nonetheless." Agatha said quietly, ignoring his attempt at provoking her. "I'm sure Mr. Renfield will see to it. Bloxham would want to know." Her eyes locked on to Frank's. "As a precaution."

"I haven't decided which best describes your treatment of me yet." Dracula chuckled as the vehicle began to slow in front of a building. "Am I a child or a prisoner to you? Perhaps both? Your nagging behavior might otherwise irritate me, but tonight is for excitement." And with his hands, he gestured to their next stop. "Behold!"

At first, the former nun thought she was seeing things. As she exited the car, she once again forwent Dracula's umbrella. The rain poured down in heavy torrents soaking her hair and clothes. But that was a concern not at the top of her mind.

Agatha's lips pressed into a firm line as she stood alongside Dracula outside of Pleasureland Amusements. When the vampire had insisted they spend the night exploring what Whitby had to offer, she hadn't expected to be coerced into going to an arcade. A place where she begrudgingly had taken Zoe more than once for a friend's birthday party.

"Perhaps I should've read up on this more." The vampire commented, breaking the silence. "I assumed Pleasureland meant something quite different." His eyes flickered to meet hers. "You should have said something."

"I should have said something?!" Agatha scoffed, folding her arms over her chest. "You are the one who picked this place out. I assumed you knew what you were doing."

"Well, you are the one who is supposed to properly introduce me to the town after all." Dracula countered with a smirk. "I could've easily gone alone, but that would breach some form of the contract–on your side." He shrugged and through her a false sheepish look. "I suppose we better go inside then. See what you humans call entertainment nowadays."

The former nun rolled her eyes as the man began to walk towards the entrance. "I'm tired of playing games with you!" But he merely waved his hand dismissively before disappearing into the crowd. "Arsehole…"

The sound of the rain was immediately placed by the excited, shrill cries of patrons and whirling games as Agatha stepped into the building. It was almost overwhelming. She stood in this world of towering machines that flashed and flickered, beckoning for her to draw closer and take her coinage. It wasn't until someone grabbed her by the forearm that she snapped to.

"Looking for me?"

The Transylvanian Count grinned at her, illuminated from behind by a pinball machine. Agatha pulled away and sucked in a breath. She hated it here, and quite frankly despised it even more. But this was for her job. This was for Zoe. So if she had to suffer by playing sticky games and cramming endless tickets into her pockets, so be it.

"What do you want to play?!" She nearly had to scream over the chao sound. "I know you are going to ask, but I have no preference."

"Actually, this one piqued my interest." Dracula replied obnoxiously cheerful. "This way."

She followed him, still dripping wet and slightly cold from the elements outside until they stood in front of a game. The timeless classic Skeeter's Ball. One is given a certain number of balls and you attempt to roll them into holes with different amounts of points in an attempt to get a high score. Agatha had never been good at this game. On one occasion, she rolled a ball so hard it flew and hit someone on the back of their head. Maybe that was one of the main reasons she couldn't stand this place.

"You go first." The vampire said as six balls rolled down. "To demonstrate."

"Okay." Agatha sighed, lifting up the weighted object. "But I'm not very good at this." With that, she gave the ball a hard roll. Not to her surprise, it landed in the lowest hole-100 points. "I told you. Now you go."

With lightning speed and precision, the vampire stepped forward and aimed for his target. The ball barely bounced before it landed in the center, 500 points. Agatha gawked as Dracula beamed with pride at his accomplishment.

"Beginner's luck!" She insisted, snatching up another ball before thrusting it into his hands. "Try again!"

Just as before, Dracula rolled and landed the bonus hole as before. As the game chimed in congratulations, the former nun frowned, feeling oddly competitive. Suddenly, she felt Dracula move behind her.

"What are you doing?!" She snapped, completely caught off guard.

"I'm assisting you." Dracula said, taking a hold of her forearm. "Trust me, you look rather pathetic rolling like that. Allow me to show you how it's really done."

The vampire's grasp was firm, but not strong enough that if Agatha so chose to, she could break away. Lifting up a ball, she allowed him to ease her wrist forward, fingers curled around the ball. When she finally let it go, it rolled smoothly up the ramp before landing in the 400 point hole.

"Not too bad." Dracula nodded, letting her go. "Perhaps if you practice for a few centuries, you'll be as good as me."

"Apparently living several centuries also increased your ego." Agatha snorted, trying to hold back a smile. "What next?"

"Hm…" The man pondered as he looked around. "Now that looks worthy of our attention!"

Agatha turned to see a large claw machine filled with plushies of all sorts. She pictured Zoe standing right in the center, her bright blue eyes lit up in excitement. The things were usually rigged, from her experience at least, but this was Dracula's place of choice so she didn't argue against it.

"How enthralling." Dracula murmured as he studied the throttle. "What an odd contraption!" He turned to Agatha with a grin. "What shall I aim for?"

She shrugged. "Something close to the top or near the drop box. If it looks crammed, don't go for it. It's hard to even win something." Her lips pursed as she watched him stare at the game in complete wonder. "Be strategic. I suppose like you're in battle."

The vampire straightened up and smirked at her words. "For that, I shall win you that purple blob looking thing."

The former nun gave a half smile and rolled her eyes. "That's supposed to be an elephant...I think." She paused. "And you don't have to win me anything."

"Then it'll be a gift for Zoe." He replied, gaze now fixed on his victim. "And you don't have to tell her that I won it. I know how you are. Though I wouldn't ever hurt her…" His fingers delicately maneuvered the throttle. "It's been over a century since I've done such a thing…"

Agatha felt her stomach twist at the thought of his words. For a brief moment, she had forgotten about what he was. As she opened her mouth to question him further, to her shock, he managed to snag the toy. The vampire let out a triumph 'ha' as the object fell down the chute and into the box.

"I have many hidden talents it would seem." Dracula exclaimed as he retrieved the toy. "I believe this belongs to you."

Slightly hesitant, Agatha accepted the elephant from the vampire. She looked it over somewhat turned off by it's sickly cute appearance. Exhaling, her attention returned to Dracula. Clearly seeing she was growing weary of the place, the Count cleared his throat.

"One more game." He posed, nodding towards an air hockey table. "And I promise it will be worth your while."

Out of all the games, this one seemed to be less populated. Agatha set the elephant down and stood on one side of the table. Dracula smiled at her, his hand already on a paddle. The game was pretty self explanatory which made the former nun question why he'd choose it to be their last.

"We will play the game as usual, but bend the rules just slightly." He instructed. "Whoever makes a point against the other player gets to ask them a question. Any sort of question. Personal or not. And the loser must answer." Dracula gave a knowing smirk. "And while I could easily find everything out about you in a matter of seconds, this seemed like a fun start."

She pushed away the eeriness of his words. "Alright then." She nodded, gripping her paddle. "You're on."

It didn't take long before the puck found its way into Agatha's hole. Not that she was shocked by that loss. Grumbling to herself, she retrieved it and placed it back in the center.

"Ask away."

"Have you always been in Holland? Or were before England?" Dracula inquired. "I know Abraham was Dutch, so after everything he decided to go back to the lovely land of windmills?"

"Yes," Agatha admitted. "I was born in Holland and stayed in Holland until Zoe's parents…" She shook her head. "Well, now I'm clearly in England. Again."

The next round lasted a few seconds longer than the first with Agatha scoring the goal. However, she knew Dracula had intentionally planned it that way. Still, it was a chance to ask him a question he couldn't refuse.

"Why are you afraid of the cross?"

Dracula let out a laugh so loud it just about startled the woman. "Come now, Agatha." He snickered in amusement. "I ask you something easy and you go ahead and cut right to the chase. Well, I suppose I shouldn't expect any less coming from you." He sighed as he studied the puck between his fingers. "Have you thought about what the cross stands for?"

"Of course." She replied curtly. "I was a nun. It stands for goodness and virtue and…"

"No, Agatha, no…" The vampire exhaled, rolling his eyes. "I was hoping you'd see the broader picture of it. When you look at the cross, really look at it, what do you see?" He doesn't wait for her to reply. "War. Fear. This internal feeling in your gut that you must not slip up on your endless virtues or will fall into the ever grabbing hands of damnation. That, my dear Sister, is why the cross is frightening. Or, so the many, many, hundreds of men and women I haven consumed over the centuries think."

"But why does it hurt you?" The woman asked. "Why…"

"You already got your answer." Dracula cut her off with a smile. "Next round."

She lost. Almost immediately. And she didn't need to look up to know Dracula was grinning widely. It was her turn to be interrogated and since she didn't go easy on him, now he was going to use the same power against her.

"Why did you become a nun, Agatha?" The vampire asked. "Out of everything, why that profession? Surely there were some more interesting options...a librarian perhaps?"

"I did it with the intent of learning more about you." She attempted to appear focused on a nearby pinball game. "From the stories past down about my grandfather, I thought perhaps going through religious texts might serve some purpose."

"And did they?" The Count questioned. "Or have you received more than your fair share about me from the Jonathan Harker Foundation?"

"That's more than one." She challenged, eyeing the puck in the center of the table. "Next round."

Thus the game continued, Dracula and Agatha posturing one another for information. It wasn't until the vampire scored once more, the puck flying into its intended target, that things began to take a turn.

"Why won't you let me talk about Zoe?" The man inquired. "It's oddly endearing of how overprotective you are of her."

"I just don't think it's appropriate." Agatha responded tersely. "I'd prefer to keep my home and work life separate."

"And I fall into the work category…" Dracula nodded thoughtfully. "She is an interesting child. Something rather unexpected must have happened to her when she was really young."

It was clear that the vampire was trying to worm another question in by making it sound like a remark. The car crash flickered in the back of the woman's mind as she took a step back from the table.

"I have a question." Their eyes locked as Agatha began to speak. "What do you mean that if you could, you could easily know anything and everything you want about me in a matter of seconds?"

The Count folded his arms. "You didn't make a goal."

"And I'm done playing games." Agatha responded firmly. "What is it that you are hiding, Count Dracula? And how and why does it involve me?"

"I should ask you the same." The vampire answered. "I believe we are equally fascinated by one another. However, I too think I'm done with these games." He glanced towards the door and smiled. "I promised you one more location. It's getting late, for you at least. We should make it there while it counts."

"But I…"

"Poor Frank's probably wondering if we've abandoned him." Dracula exhaled, clicking his tongue. "A smart man, but rather meek. Mousy. Best not keep him on edge." Once more he produced the umbrella. "I suggest you use this now. Best not get Zoe's new toy wet."

As Dracula had predicted, Mr. Renfield seemed very relieved upon their return. He eyed the stuffed animal on Agatha's lap curiously before pulling away from the arcade. The former nun reclined back on her seat, thinking of the scraps of knowledge she'd gathered from Dracula and how she could possibly piece them together. It wasn't until the car pulled to a stop that she snapped back to reality.

"Last stop of the night." The Count grinned as he stepped out of the car. "Saving the best for last."

Agatha's eyes traveled upwards to the sign on top of the building. Raw Nightclub. Heat rose to her cheeks as she looked herself over. In a pair of jeans, old shirt, and hair wet from the rain, she was in no condition to go into any establishment of class, let alone a nightclub. The restaurant and arcade had been hard enough. But before she could protest, the vampire was already on his way inside. Biting back a groan, she hurried in after him. Fucking blood sucker.

The chaos in the arcade was child's play to what was happening in the club. Smoke, multicolored flashing lights, mixed with the smells of sweat and cheap perfume. The music, whatever was playing, vibrated the floorboards as a pale hand extended towards the former nun. Agatha looked to see Dracula offering her a toothy grin.

"Agatha Van Helsing." He bowed, completely out of place to the DJ's upbeat remixes. "May I have this dance?"

[theartofimaginaryfriends]

Chapter 9 - Rules

Fic series: The Final Straw (HP/PJO Crossover)

Premise: Nova has a a nightmare and the teams are chosen.

Masterlist

taglist: @ilvermornymascot, @lukecastellandeservedbetter, @eva-blog-p

word count: 2,100

A/N: This break from the fic was longer than intended but I've been fixated on Hunters (Amazon Prime) and started a blog for it because there's barely any fanfiction for Hunters and that's a travesty. To make up for it being nearly a month since I last updated (I think?) I made the chapter way longer than normal, but I think I'm going to stick to chapters being around this length. Definitely reduces the amount of chapters I originally planned while keeping the timeline in check XD Hope you enjoy this very late installment!

Nightmares were a common occurrence for demigods, being nearly unavoidable. Some were stronger than others, leaving the demigod remembering every vivid detail when they woke up. Others were weaker, causing the demigod to wake up with a few details forgotten. Nova was unlucky, her latest nightmare leaving her confused in the morning.

The demigoddess stood in the corner of a dimly lit room, watching as a house-elf brought a letter over to their master, who was lounging on a plush leather couch. "Great. A letter from that wretched school. Now scram, I want dinner in an hour."

"Yes, mistress." The house-elf squeaked and scampered off.

Unable to help her curiosity, Nova moved closer to the girl and peered over her shoulder. The name addressed in the letter was blurry, but the contents spoke of the transfer program. The witch tossed it aside in annoyance and got up from her spot on the couch. Nova followed her as she stormed out of the home and into the adjacent forest.

Nova had to jog to follow her pace but stopped when the air chilled. It was dusk, but the sky darkened quicker than usual. The atmosphere changed to one that was all too familiar, and yet brand new at the same time. The demigoddess's breath shook as she couldn't contain her fear. "You've come back sooner than expected."

"That transfer program that has been rumoured is official," the girl said, clearly annoyed. "I can't just play nice and be chummy with all of them! This is complete rubbish."

"Listen, child," the voice said. It sounded like it was coming from all around them, and the voice belonged to no one in particular. Gaea was what immediately came to Nova's mind, but the voice was male. It was Ouranos, it had to be. "You said you wanted to fulfill your former Master's plans and kill that boy you keep talking about, didn’t you?"

"Yes."

"Seeing as you follow me now, you will abide by my rules," Ouranos commanded. "Go to this transfer program. Make friends with them or don't, it makes no difference to me. Follow the program, and update me monthly on what is going on. We cannot be hasty, patience is a must. When the time comes, you will help me regain my physical form, so I can destroy those wretched demigods and you can kill your enemy."

Nova watched the girl, knowing very well what Ouranos was doing. He made it seem like they were allies and working together when in reality, the Titan was in complete control. He was just going to kill her when he was done with her, and she didn’t stand a chance. "Thank you, Master Ouranos."

The sky lightened back to dusk, and the atmosphere changed back to normal. Nova found herself following the traitor back to the manor, but as she walked the scene began to melt away.

She couldn’t make sense of what she had just seen. The Sky Titan's voice was clear in her mind, but everything else was fuzzy when she woke up. Nova sat up, and placed her head in her hands, trying to process what had just happened. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah," Nova answered Payton, who had pulled back the curtains to sit on the edge of Nova's bed. Her arm was outstretched, holding Nova's water bottle out to her. "Thanks."

"Wanna talk about it?" Payton asked, a worried look in her eyes. Nova shook her head after taking a giant swig of water and took a deep breath.

"Not really, no," she sighed. "I'd rather process everything first."

"Maybe breakfast will help," she said.

"Ah, yes," Nova had a small amused smile on her face. "Eating. What a concept."

"Just get dressed so we can go," Payton laughed. After taking another minute trying to rack her brain for a clearer image of the nightmare, Nova got up and changed before grabbing a book and heading out.

The girls were silent as they made their way to The Great Hall, but the silence wasn't filled with as much tension as it had on the first night. While it was still heavy, Nova found herself feeling less apprehensive around her old enemy. Payton really did seem to want to be her friend, and even if last night's comment was a little odd, Nova knew in her heart that it was well-intended.

When they got to The Great Hall, the girls separated and Nova made a beeline for her usual group. She sat in between Cree and Percy, the table already in deep discussion about the teams being chosen tonight. She didn’t add much to the conversation, feeling drained. "Nova, is everything okay?"

"Nightmare," she shook her head, looking at Cree. "I'll be fine."

"What about?" Percy interjected, the group's attention shifting to The Head Girl.

"It was unclear, but I believe that one of the people in the dream was the traitor," she said. "I never saw their face, but they were talking to Ouranos. It felt more like I was in a Pensieve."

"Pensieve?"

"It stores memories," Harry explained. "Depending on the memory, it can feel like you're in a nightmare."

"And it felt like I was intruding on someone else's memory," Nova sighed. "But we shouldn't worry about that right now, there's still another eight hours for people to enter."

Nova took to people watching on the stairs again, paying more attention to the book in her hands than she was yesterday. "Didn’t realize this year would reopen old wounds."

"Neither did I," Nova said, turning to Harry. "How are you feeling?"

"Angry," he admitted. "But who isn’t?"

"You and Percy have the worst luck," she stated. "Once everything's calm, something else pops up."

"My scar hasn’t hurt, which is a bright side," Harry reached up and touched his forehead instinctively. "But it feels like it will any minute. As if I hadn’t actually killed him."

"Voldemort is dead, Harry," the witch reassured her friend. "We don’t have to worry about him."

"Just need to worry about something completely out of my range."

"Isn't that the point of this competition?" Nova chuckled darkly. "To ensure it won’t be?"

"Sound about right." Harry shrugged, a small smile playing on his lips. The two of them ended up chatting for most of the day. Cree joined in later, stating that Nova's Head Girl duties have deprived him of time spent with her.

After dinner, the school settled into the balconies as if they were going through a sorting ceremony, waiting for the names to appear. Instead of Professor Tahamente making the speech, he left the floor to McGonagall. The woman managed to quiet the entire student body with one stern look, before beginning her speech. "In a moment, the fountain will reveal the teams. If your name is called, please make your way back into The Great Hall, and sit with your chosen partner. I will announce the names as they appear, and while this happens I expect there to be silence until the end."

The headmistress stepped back, and everyone watched as the fountain began to glow. The teams came up in four groups each time, and there were mixed reactions. "Harry Potter and Percy Jackson."

The two boys high fived, and happily descended down the stairs. No one was surprised at that pairing, many students finding it unfair. "Clarisse La Rue and Draco Malfoy."

Clarisse shoved past the Slytherin, making him stumble as he followed her. Draco didn't seem pleased either, his signature scowl on his face. "Jason Grace and Luna Lovegood."

A few classmates snickered, and Jason seemed a little worried. Luna was often in her own world, and to Jason, she didn’t seem like much of a fighter. "Leo Valdez and Hermione Granger."

Leo immediately tried to charm his new partner, and Hermione rolled her eyes at his attempt.  "Annabeth Chase and Seamus Finnigan."

The two walked in silence, Nova noticing the gears in Annabeth's head-turning. She never stops thinking about a strategy, even when she doesn't know the challenge at hand. "Hazel Levesque and Blaise Zabini."

Hazel glanced at her partner as they walked together, and Blaise was completely stone-faced. It was always hard to tell what he was thinking, but he had fought in the war against Voldemort with most of the Slytherins. "Nico di Angelo and Ginny Weasley."

Nova thought their dynamic would be interesting. Both were smart, but polar opposites as far as she was concerned. "Travis Stoll and Ronald Weasley."

It was almost like Ron was partnering up with one of his brothers, which screamed utter chaos. The next four teams came up quicker than the first two times, the air growing tenser as everyone anticipated who would be next. "Meg McCaffery and Neville Longbottom."

Everyone tried to hold back a snicker while watching Neville glance at the short and temperamental thirteen-year-old. Meg had given Neville a once over, before nodding once in approval and bounding down the stairs. "Piper McLean and Dean Thomas."

Dean smiled at Piper, and they started chatting in low voices. The demigoddess could tell they'd make a great team and smiled to herself. "Frank Zhang and Pansy Parkinson."

Murmurs started, and Frank was clearly nervous. He stopped at Nova and whispered to her. "Should I be worried?"

"A little bit, yeah," Nova told him. "I'm sure if you sit with Hazel it'll be fine. Blaise can keep Pansy in her lane."

"Thanks," Frank audibly gulped and made his way down to an annoyed Slytherin, who glared at the Praetor. McGonagall cleared her throat to tell the school to be quiet and continued.

"Kayla Knowles and Cree Fletcher."

Cree looked at Nova for guidance, and she assured him that Kayla would be a fantastic partner. Relieved, he left her side and met the archer a the bottom of the stairs. From where Nova stood, she could see that those two were already getting along, and it made her relax significantly. Cree was her best friend and if anyone would make sure he made it through this alive, she was glad Kayla was that person.

The rest of the teams were called out, and by the end of it, everyone was either bored or fidgety. "Would our Head Boy and Girl please join us in The Great Hall, as well as Will Solace. As for the rest of you, you may go to the lodges, and get ready for the campfire."

"Why are they asking for me?" Will asked as the three students made their way in.

"I'm guessing it's because they want the healers to be in the loop," Nova told him. "Chiron likely mentioned that you'd be an important asset."

Nova often aided the Apollo kids, and especially Will, when they needed an extra medic. The two of them had taught each other different healing techniques, and Nova supplied the camp with healing potions. It benefited them in the wars they fought within a year of each other.

"Congratulations to all of you that were chosen for the championship," Professor Tahamente smiled at the group. "There will be many trials and tribulations ahead of us, but please remember that this is about building teamwork and developing a bond that may assist us all in the future. Our first task at hand will take place on Saturday, November 21. In the Quad next week, we will set up stations for each of your teams to build a chariot together. Lucas and Nova will oversee it in shifts to ensure there is fair play. We will have Pukwudgie guarding the area during the night so that we can make sure there won’t be any sabotage.

"Will Solace will act as one of the healers on sight during the competition. The others will be Nurse Hawkins, Madame Pomphrey, and Nova Sterling. There will be no additions to the chariots that can potentially ruin another team's chariot during the race, and we will be checking for any extra charms on the chariots that could allow anyone to cheat. As for specific rules of the games, that will be revealed on game day. Are we clear?"

"Yes, sir," Everyone chorused.

"If you have any questions in between now and the day of the competition, please don’t hesitate to ask," Tahamente smiled. He dismissed the group and stepped away from the podium. As soon as they all made it to the campfire, the teams were greeted by applause.

Some students basked in the attention, others seemed nervous. The only thing certain at the moment was that the dynamics were about to change.