#I’m screaming into the void here. ADHD.

[achildsfirstsorrow]

I have Erik brainrot as per usual and cannot stop thinking about Nivek Ogre. Yes I’ve posted something like this before but does anyone else see my vision.

Also here’s younger Nivek w/ his pet possum he had.

[aspenonpawzzz]

HENLO! (pls read )

Hi-hi-hi!

My name is Aspen! I’m the host of the Canis Constellation. My pronouns are They/them and It/its, so please use gender-neutral, non human terms when refering to me! I am a TransAlterine Omniromantic Asexual, and support All identities (except p3d0s, z0()s, maps, dreamsexuals, or other thing such as those!) NO POLITICS PLEASE (alterine https://yb3.fandom.com/wiki/Alterine)

term hoard sideblog: @aspens-hoard

ASPEC MAFIA COMMANDER!

@aspec-warriors Mafia acc

I am :

a Leo, a 5, a chaotic nutural, introvert ,and a INTJ, plus a red fox, Mexican coy-wolf, and AA wolf THERIAN!

I Mostly shitpost/reblog, but my main theme is The owl house, alterhuman, fandom and art posts!

I have dislexia, discalucla, and disgraphia, along with AuDHD, triocotillamania and MaDD. I’m a median gateway system, with a Monoconscious! I still use I/me but also we/us!

Our system side blog is @canis-constellation

I am a vulture culturist, mask maker,a cosplayer, a quadrobist, a fanfic writer, a fan artist, and my aesthetic is Goblincore and cryptidcore!

my favs:

-turn off the lights (panic! at the disco) {IT GOES SO HARD}

-green

-Oh geeez, not again. (band)

-wolfwalkers

-the owl house

-Spirit of the north

-wild rescuers

-fox

-taiga

Questioning cryptid kin of some kind, possibly Runalong!

I AM A MINOR, SO NO FUNNY BUSINESS

Our Alters!

✨🌳 aspen |15.5 mentally| {they/it} [Madd, AuDHD] /Omniromantic ace\ ' “human”/ Alterhuman’ <The Creator,Multiversal vessel>

💦💫 Polaris |400| {They/them} [Madd] /Aroace\ 'divine being' <Sentinel of the stars, they the divine>

briar 🪶🥀 |16| {They/Them} [ADHD] /Asexual Aromantic\ ‘Grimwalker’  <Silver scout>

Hunter/phantom🪶🐺{He/they/it/canine themed neos} |16| [Autism, C-PTSD] /Biromantic Asexual\ 'shapeshifting grimwalker' <He who guards, The Golden Guard, It who transforms>

Hycan 🐺🔩 {He/it, } |16/17| [Autism] /aroace\ ‘human’ it does have a animatironic form but it prefers human form (credit to @wolfsnooze for AU) <None currently>

Salem 🔪 🩸 |13.5| {it/Its, ok with masc terms} [Sociopathy, Unable to feel Love (A-spec)] /Aroace\ 'Void-kin'  <Death, It who comes for all, Grim-reaper>

River 🌊🐺|16.3| {it/they/wolf themed neos} [Autism] /omni ace\ ‘werewolf’ (in qpr/relationship with phantom) <none currently>

Information :

tags:

aspen yips: silly stuff

aspen speaks (REAL): importiant

aspen barks: alterhuman stuff

aspen squeals: fandom/ hyperfixtion

aspen crows: neurodivergency

aspen howls: creative

[instert word or something]] Au: a au of mine Phantom posting: fictionkin/ hunter related stuff

screaming into the void: system stuff.

AU MASTERLIST

DNI:

anti-lgbtq+, people who ship canon (insert sexuality) with (instert gender that the person is NOT attracted to) ei, a lesbian with a male, anti-furry,anti-therian,anti-vulture culture,anti-quadrobics, 18+ or kink blogs, if you’re older that 18(unless I knew you before you turned 18, or pass The Vibe Check{stalk ur blog}) , ableists, racists, exculionist, The works.

PLEASE INTERACT:

Alterhumans (Therians, otherkin, otherkith, otherhearted, animal hearted,otherlink,copinglink, furrians[furry therians], holotheres, soul shards, phytanthropes, and ANY OTHERS PLEASE ) furries, TOH or gf fans, artists and writers and cosplayers and musicains, freaks and werdios, vulture culturists, quadrobists, mogia and liom, enbies and enbyfluxes, fictionkins and fictives, systems,LGBTQIA+and people with decency.

PLEASE DO NOT:

treat me lesser/younger than you, treat me like a child, call me human, or person/people, talk Abt politics ,or involve me in such matters, repost(reblogging is fine) my ideas.

RANDOM OTHER BLOG RULES

This is a "Ship and let ship" blog. only exceptions are "insert orenation" with "a gender orenation is NOT attracted to" , Minor with not minor, [age] with [ age more than 2-3 years apart] aroace with anyone, bully x victim (ie bochlow) villian x hero with in certain bounderies, ab#sive or toxic ships, or proships.

NO HATING/DISSING ON OTHERS SHIPS. ANY WILL BE BLOCKED.

any aggressive hating/ threats will be blocked. only z0()s, n3cr0s, p3d0s, and other harmful “philia”s are allowed to be hated on here. if you support/are these, find help and leave this blog. this is not for you.

gatekeeping is not allowed. at all.

support of KOSA and other things like this is not allowed.

take your discorse and politics elsewere. this is a fun blog for fun stuff.

I am a minor, if +18 dni unless I, a trusted person, or a mewtual vet your blog.

I WILL SPAM LIKE AND REBLOG.

I use tonetags.

I AM ONLINE 7-2:50 ON THE WEEK, EXCEPT TUESDAY, WHICH IS 8-10, then 1-3.

Biggest Mewtual- @justalexisfine

I CAN SEE RUNALONGS!

‼️If you request anything,(pfp especially) CREDIT ME‼️

THANK YOU FOR COMING TO MY BLOG! <3

[typingatlightspeed]

Okay forgive me for being sappy here but I still can’t believe how lucky I was to be into tf2 now instead of like four years ago. Imagine coming across this awesome series and when you reach the bottom it just. Stops. It stopped and ended with red demo and blu Solly only sort of making up and the rest of the gang are just gone and you’ll never know what happened to them. And you leave the fandom eventually and wouldn’t ever know that BANG six years later you come back with vacation all I ever wanted and everything’s back again, you get to see these characters again and write and head canon and think up scenarios in bed for them again. And I didn’t even have to go through the six “weh this series is dead” years.

So yeah. I’m lucky I think

I felt like such a villain for years because of this, no longer able to write and screaming into the void about it. I lost my sex drive, my passion, and myself, all because of a cluster of unusual side effects of my medication (methylphenidate HCL, aka ritalin), which because they were such unusual side effects (literally the polar opposite of every common side effect) my doctor thought were hormonal issues related to my birth control for YEARS. Constant retooling and dialing in of those meds and completely ignoring that my ritalin was barely doing what it was supposed to do and doing everything to give me literal dysphoria because I was no longer the person I had been my entire fucking life. It was affecting my marriage a lot, too, making my husband doubt my attraction to him. It was hell.

When a friend of mine posted her experience starting ADHD meds after 40, and described how dramatic it was, like flicking a switch, I realized that my meds were not doing what they were supposed to do. So I talked to my doctor and suggested I go off of them, see where I'm at, and maybe try a different med from there. She was like hell yeah make sure you have a day or two off of work in case you feel like dogshit when you go off (I did lol). Two days later I wrote Ain't Seen Nothin' Yeti. The first fiction piece I'd written in six fucking years. I did a lot of crying.

I've rebounded so much, (a bit more than I was before in ways that make my husband very secure in his attractiveness lmao) and I've decided not to bother trying more meds. At least not right now. And since then it's been an explosion of the stories I've wanted to write for years but couldn't, and it feels so good.

The big thing is, though, during those years I stopped checking Ao3, because I felt so guilty that I was sure there were going to be bitter messages asking where I'd gone, why I hadn't updated, or worse, anger over it. So I didn't look. After I put out Ain't Seen Nothin' Yeti, I worked up my courage and checked my Ao3 inbox.

It was an outpouring of love, joy, laughter, and yes lamentations that there isn't more, that it stopped, but no anger, no bitterness, no blame, just oh man I hope someday there's more I love this so much.

And that meant the world to me. I did a lot of crying.

So yeah, you did get lucky. And so did I; that I could come back and keep writing and keep telling these stories. <3 I just hope that anyone who loved thes stories can find out that I'm back.

[jungkoode]

Hey Kiki! (≧◡≦)♡

First off, just wanna say I freakin’ love everything you write! Still owe you a read on 25h, but I’m already hyped!

So, I need some advice from you as a writer. I’ve been working on this story for a while now, and it’s super close to my heart D: but I have no clue how to put it out there—like, how do I even get people to notice it? Got any tips? I’m really set on making this happen, but it’s kinda scary ‘cause it’s so personal, and I lowkey fear people won’t vibe with it hahaha.

Also, do you have a beta reader? How do I even find one? Pls help! (シ) My ADHD brain refuses to trust itself with typos and plot holes.

Basically… can I borrow that big sexy brain of yours to help me figure this out? •ω•

Ann!!! First of all, THANK YOU for the love!! I'm already mentally shaking you by the shoulders for even considering reading 25H—that one is like my deranged child, but I love it. Hope you enjoy the chaos when you get to it!!

Now, onto your writing conundrum! First of all, I FEEL YOU. Putting something so personal out there is terrifying because it's like throwing your soul into the void and hoping the void claps instead of throwing it back at your face. But here’s the deal: the void is mostly full of other writers who feel the exact same way, so they’ll GET IT.

Tags are your best friend—use relevant and popular ones for visibility. Example: if you’re writing a Jungkook fic, make sure you use ‘jungkook x reader’ ‘jungkook fic’ ‘jungkook fanfic’ and such, rather than ‘BTS’ or ‘jungkook’. Updating consistently (or faking it) helps too—even if you're slow, a semi-regular schedule keeps engagement up. If you have a buffer, you can post on a schedule. If not, I just lie to myself and pretend I have one.

Interacting with readers is key. People are more likely to keep up with a fic if they feel connected to the author. Be unhinged in the replies. It works. Your title and summary also matter more than we’d like to admit—a good summary doesn’t just explain the plot, it sells the vibes. Think of it like the fanfic equivalent of a thirst trap. And honestly? Be shameless about promotion. AO3 doesn’t have an algorithm, so cross-posting on Twitter (X? Ew.) or Tumblr can help.

I… do not have a beta reader, because I live on the edge. Also, I have trust issues (and ADHD, which means I reread my own chapters 50 times and still miss typos). If you want one, the best way to find them is through Discord writing groups, AO3 writing circles, or just screaming into the abyss on social media and seeing who responds. Some beta readers are just proofreaders, while others give in-depth feedback on plot, so find someone who matches your needs.

Basically, DO IT. Post the thing. Be brave. Be delusional. Even if people don’t vibe with it the way you hope, it’ll find its audience. And if all else fails, remember: even the messiest, typo-ridden, borderline-feral fics have dedicated fans. We are an unhinged species, and we love what we love.

Can’t wait to see your work out there!!! (•̀ᴗ•́)و

[chaotic-idiots]

hai

this blog is run by @brodiedoesthings, @be-cat-do-crime, @nothingf-i-s-h-yhere, @elizarivers, @sleepy-boything-shit, and @oceaniddoesstuff if he wants to anything for this lmao

we now also have @mystic-mae on here, so that's fun :3

anyways dni if your homophobic, transphobic, ableist, bigoted, racist, all that kinda stuff

but pretty much just chill and have fun while we fuck around

let's see everyone's introduction below now

chat put your intros here

hola pendejos im fish! aka @nothingf-i-s-h-yhere im a menace who likes men a lot for someone who is technically bi. i got autism and adhd so thats real fun! i like tf2 and gmod and the such. my tag is "#the fish speaks" also im taken! so no. you cant date me!

Opa! Eaê? I'm Emme, A.K.A. @h4rdw4r3-k1d. I'm an enby-demi-femboy from the Pátria Amada, Brazil, I'm AuDHD, and I'm a writer. And though I'm not the greatest technician that's ever lived or anything, I'm into hardware and software, especially Linux, and I'm REALLY into the aesthetic. My tag is "#beep boop" as I am indeed, a compupiter. And that's it for my intro. Te vejo.

g'day mate! im brodie, aka @brodiedoesthings, im a bi femboy, who might be enby, not sure tho. im from queensland, im probably autistic or on the spectrum in some capacity, im trying to figure out how linux works emme please help me. my tag is '#the dog barks' cause im a lil puppy (according to emme atleast) and thats it for my intro, cya later fuckers.

hello hello helloooo!! im sora!! @sleepy-boything-shit , nice to meet ya :3. im transmasc and bi, my pronouns are he/she/they/it. ive got adhd, uhhh theres nothing else about me. whenever i post here, my tags gonna be “#he screams into the void.” peace ✌️

hello children. i’m eliza, @elizarivers. i’m bi, a demigirl (they/them), and taken by the gremlin above. i’m from the US and my tag is “pussy destroyer speaks” (fuck you brodie). uh. i like writing and singing but i never do it so um. yay! bye byeee

uh... fuck. hi. i'm that creature who runs @mystic-mae. im pansexual aromantic, and my gender could give less than two fucks (he/they/void/she). i guess you could say im one of those trans people. i have a shit ton of names, but those can be found on my main. my tag is "#stop screaming in my ear" (im the void, darlings. i hear you, but i cant help you.) also a poet, so you'll find me fucking around.

[alex-the-bard]

so i’m seeing a lot of intro posts so i guess this is it

heyo, the name’s Alex, or if you’re lazy Al or Lex is fine, they/it if you please (do it or i will hurt you)

@moonysfavoritetoast is my husband!

massively adhd, deeply traumatized, followers will suffer the wrath of vent posts on their dash

likes; reading, writing, drawing, screwing with my friends, crying

dislikes: anything bigoted, homophobes, the sun, writer’s/artist’s block

dni: bigots, homophobes, people with a need to be the smartest person in the room, zoophiles, pedophiles, war criminals

now with that out of the way lemme get into what i actually wanna say:

this blog is a safe space for ✨ANYONE✨

yes

✨EVERYONE✨

if you’re feeling alone, scared, or just need someone to talk to, i’m here, i’m queer, and i’m all ears!

also i fucking swear if i hear a word out of my moots abt self harm i will bring the wrath of the gods upon them and make them take care of themselves.

also handing out free hugs, headpats, and kind words to anyone that needs it so just hop on over to the abyss to scream and the lord of the void will see you as soon as they can.

FRIENDS!!!

KOSA paper:

tags:

dreamscape nexus: #Dreamscape Nexus

the Documentarian/Doc: #Documentarian’s letters

second loop of the cycle: #second time around

Ascario documents: #recovered from Ascario

[scrapsovereign]

So………………

I’m back on Tumblr after nuking my accounts because I started playing this video game. My s/o had played a couple times and really enjoyed it and I thought hey! I want to play it too!

Y’all…………

BG3 and Astarion have ruined my life……..

Like I had to un-sub from r/okbuddybaldur because the thirst was preoccupying me waaaaaaay too much. Between work, getting married this fall, trying to make some *ahem* changes of a labor organizing nature at the worksite, and just trying to do life in general I needed to let the energy out, not take more distraction in. We got the ADHD over here and already struggle with that to begin with.

So, of course, I decide that writing fanfic is the best way to regularly purge my depraved thoughts. I can have a little creativity! As a treat! Right? RIGHT?

I’m 30k words in on “The Long Way Down” on AO3 and don’t show any signs of slowing down. I’m having real big imposter syndrome I’m actually even there!

SO IM BACK IN TUMBLR to use this space to scream in to the void. If you are here, reading this, thank you for being witness to my clumsy journey in writing my very first not troll fic (I will maintain that “Unscheduled Off-World Ejaculation” is actually Stargate SG1 cannon)

Again, thank you for taking the time to visit, and most importantly, I’m sorry.

[ymdslf]

(shrek voice) welcome to my blog

hi, i'm matti, but i honestly don't really care what you call me. i prefer they/them pronouns, but i’m fine with he/him and i like to throw in the occasional ze/zir, dey, or even she just to keep people on their toes, because gender and pronouns are all made up anyway. general rule of thumb is: as long as everyone is moderately to terribly confused, i’m fine with whatever you use to refer to me.

i'm german, so occasionally there's gonna be a random german post, but i'm keeping this in english because of reasons.

i'm nonbinary, aroacespec and women give me life <3 i've got some neurodivergent shit going on, mainly adhd and depression but also i'm in the process of getting diagnosed for anxiety disorder and autism.

i'm in a shit ton of fandoms and i'm terrible at tagging, so i'm sorry about that.

what i do (try to) tag is as follows: the percy jackson show on d+ and boygenius and each of the boys. those are: #percy series!, #percy series spoilers!, #boygenius, #julien baker, #lucy dacus, #phoebe bridgers

other things i usually always tag are: stranger things, which i also tag with subcategories a lot of the time; good omens; my rambling and screaming into the void; my other favorite band, the amazing devil; stuff about the percy jackson books and all related fandoms

and those are: #stranger things, #platonic stobin, #steddie, #good omens, #mattis talks, #the amazing devil, #riordanverse

my main fandoms right now are (in no particular order): stranger things, percy jackson and the riordanverse, good omens, the amazing devil and boygenius

you'll also be seeing just a fuckton of shitposts and the occasional social justice post here and there.

a few more things: i'm 17, i write sometimes (ao3), i like cats more than dogs. send me asks if you wanna, i'll take everything so i can procrastinate studying for my exams.

[fanby-fckry]

📌 Welcome friends, foes, and passersby to my personal piece of fandom hell.

About My Blog:

18+ only; minors will be blocked

Please, please put your age in your bio!

No further DNI, but I will block bigots, bullies, and blank blogs. Terfs, aphobes, and exclusionists please exit the blog and find a hobby that isn’t bullying queer people on tumblr.

This blog was originally created as a way for me to share my fanfiction and accept requests, but has since expanded to incorrect quotes, memes, and occasionally non-fandom bs.

It runs pretty much entirely on queue and scheduled posts. I don’t have notifs turned on for the app, so I may take a while to respond to messages and asks.

Fandoms:

The Amazing Devil (Band)

Doctor Who

Fullmetal Alchemist

Harry Potter – I do not support JKR

Hazbin Hotel

Helluva Boss

Steven Universe

The Witcher

I tend to cycle through them based on the whims of my ADHD brain, and when each is posted is unknown even to me.

Tags:

#Fanby’s Fuckery – All original posts (minus ramblings)

#Fanby’s Fics – My fanfiction

#Fanby’s Headcanons – My headcanons and occasionally a few scattered plot bunnies

#Fanby Answers – Answered asks

#Fanby Adds – Reblogs where I add something (that I think is) significant

#Fanby’s Ramblings – Rants, ramblings, screaming into the void, and other general mumblings of madness that I don’t want clogging up my main tag

#Not OSHA Compliant – Content with kink and/or sexual and/or suggestive themes; original posts may also be marked with the mature filter

#Undescribed – Posts with images that do not have image descriptions

#Functionally Described – Posts that don’t have dedicated image descriptions, but describe the image in the post

#Not Fandom – Any posts not related to fandoms or fics

Posts and memes about my fics are tagged #Fanby: [fic name]

Common triggers are tagged #[trigger] cw

If you’d like something tagged, please don’t hesitate to ask.

Accessibility:

I’m currently going through old posts for an accessibility update, but once that’s done…

Original posts will all have image descriptions

IDs under two-hundred characters will be in the alt text.

IDs over two-hundred characters will be in plain text.

If an image is meant to be reposted – for example, a meme template – then the ID will be in plain text for easy copy-pasting.

If you find my content inaccessible or have a way to make it more accessible, please please tell me. I’ve been doing research, but there’s a lot to learn – not to mention the conflicting information. Criticism in regards to accessibility is more than welcome.

Refs, Recs, and Resources:

#Fanby’s Ref Folder – Catchall tag for things I want to save to revisit later (working on phasing it out)

#AO3 Tips

#Crisis Tips

#Donate Here

#Fic Recs

#Inspo

#Internet Tips

#Life Tips

#Palestine Resources

Black-and-white thinking in fandom and resources for CBT, DBT, and addressing cognitive distortions.

About Me:

My name is Nico, I’m 25, and I write fanfic. I use they/them and xe/xem pronouns, and have a whole heap of queer labels I fall under. For more info on my labels and term preferences, check out my pronouns.page.

I’m part of an real life love triangle made up of myself, my fiancé, and our boyfriend.

If you wanna read more of my work, I’m on AO3 as fanby, and have some exclusive fics posted there.

Blog’s new, but I’m not. I was on this hellsite back in the ‘go nuts, show nuts’ golden age and when they finally shut this place down, staff will have to call animal control to remove me from the air vents like the rabid little raccoon I am <3

I have a twitter, but there’s literally nothing there that isn’t here. Check it out if you prefer Musk’s bird app, I guess?

Fanfic Masterlists:

Harry Potter – WIP

Hazbin Hotel/Helluva Boss

The Witcher

Kinktober

AO3 Exclusives – Links to the AO3 collection

Requests:

Requests are currently open for mutuals only. I’m trying to limit requests at the moment, but will make an exception for mutuals if I think I can swing it.

Will Write:

Angst with a happy ending

Hurt/comfort

Fluff

Familial relationships

Found family trope

X reader

OCs

Canon x OC

Any relationship style: platonic, queer platonic, romantic, sexual, D/s dynamics

Most kinks

Explicit kink

Non-explicit sexual content

Might Write:

Hurt/no comfort

Crossovers

OOC

Non-canon disabilities and mental illness *1

Alastor as a Voodoo practitioner*2

Explicit sexual content *3

*1 If I’m going to represent a marginalized group, I’m going to do my best to do so respectfully, even in fanfiction. If I’m not confident in my ability to do that, then I may choose not to.

That being said, I’m down to research and I have lived experience with chronic pain and a few mental illnesses. I am extremely confident in my ability to project my own experiences onto my blorbos, and do so quite frequently.

*2 This is mainly for the same reason I won’t write non-canon disabilities. Voodoo is highly misrepresented and I don’t want to contribute to that. I may write him as a past practitioner depending on the circumstances and as long as his current magic is not Voodoo-based.

My personal headcanon is that he grew up practicing Voodoo and ancestral magic, but burned bridges in the pursuit of power and lost support because being a serial killer is generally frowned upon. I usually write his current magic as non-specific, demonic, or Eldritch in nature.

*3 My ability to write explicit sexual content varies, so I’ll be taking this on a case by case basis.

Won’t Write – This Fandom-Specific Content:

Note: These are due to personal preference, deeply ingrained headcanons, and nunn’yuh (none ya business). I am not judging or condemning any of these ships/headcanons/etc. or people who make fanworks involving them; it’s just a comfort thing.

Hazbin Hotel:

Rosie in an NSFW context

Chalastor

Alastor x Niffty

Angel Dust shipped romantically with women

Vaggie shipped with men

The Witcher:

Yennefer bashing

Ciri (including adult!Ciri) shipped with any Wolf School Witcher

Ciri (including adult!Ciri) shipped with Jaskier/Dandelion

Won’t Write – This General Content:

Note: A good deal of this section falls under Kinktomato or YKINMKATO (Your Kink Is Not My Kink (And That's OK)) and DLDR (Don’t Like, Don’t Read) – just like, with writing instead of reading.

I’m not here to take sides in shipcourse or police other people’s writing; this is, again, about my own comfort level with writing certain topics. That’s it.

Scat/watersports/emeto kink

Adult x minor ships

Underage NSFW/smut/explicit, including any underage kink

Incest, including adoptive/step family

Detailed or romanticized non-con *1

Detailed or romanticized dub-con *1

Detailed or romanticized suicide *2

Detailed or romanticized self harm *2

*1 I can write aftermath of non-con/dub-con or attempted non-con/dub-con, but will not go into detail or portray it as in any way positive. I won’t write the reader or a canon characters as the perpetrator, unless it’s already in canon – AKA: The Valentino Exception. This does not include negotiated CNC, which I would consider writing under specific circumstances.

*2 Any time I write content involving suicide or suicidal ideation, I write with the National Recommendations for Depicting Suicide in mind.

The way suicide is portrayed in fiction can have real world consequences:

“Studies have shown that both news reports and fictional accounts of suicide in movies and television can lead to increases in suicide. In contrast, when depictions are done responsibly, the media can help to encourage help seeking, dispel myths, and reinforce hope – and ultimately save lives.”

(Source: Alliance for Suicide Prevention)

I am a suicide survivor and have lost loved ones to suicide as well, so this is deeply personal to me. If you’re struggling with self harm or suicidal thoughts, please hold on, and don’t be afraid to ask for help:

International Suicide Hotlines

Australia Lifeline: 13 11 14

Canada Talk Suicide: 1.833.456.4566

UK Samaritans: 116 123

USA Suicide and Crisis Lifeline: 988

[recorderzone]

Welcome to the circus!

Welcome to the Recorder Zone, a blog where I only occasionally scream into the void about obscure early musical instruments! I’m Jasper (pen name), a gay Jew with raging ADHD and it very much shows. Beyond that, I don’t use a whole lot of labels, but I generally don’t love super masculine terms (particularly dude, bro, man—as a rule of thumb, if it sounds like something a frat bro might say, maybe don’t call me that).

I’m an adult, and while I usually don’t post much that I would consider inappropriate for minors, I can’t promise that something risqué won’t pop up here once in a while. I trust your judgement to avoid following me if that makes you uncomfortable. Please don’t follow me if you’re a bigot of any stripe.

A little about me:

I’m really into music! I love the recorder (obviously), but my primary instrument is the oboe/English horn. I’m also a decent flutist and have at least some working knowledge with most woodwinds and piano.

I really love baroque/classical/romantic music, Impressionism, and especially weird early-mid 20th century shit. Ravel and Hindemith have my heart.

Beyond instrumental music, I enjoy anything from indie folk to progressive metal. I’m not a huge music snob—I usually just listen to the same 7 songs on repeat at any given time.

I’m a huge huge nature enthusiast! I love hiking, camping, bird-watching, and using Jewish spirituality as a way to enhance outdoor experiences. I haven’t seen very much of the world yet, but I’m always eager to talk about other people’s experiences in the great outdoors!

In theory, I love the idea of being a book person, but I’m like mega dyslexic. Whoops.

I’m a huge nerd about Judaism—I’m reconstructionist, I can’t help it! I’m a Jew-by-choice who only recently completed my conversion, so I still have a lot to learn!

I like to collect hobbies and then get burned out on them after a few months. In theory I enjoy crocheting, lace-making, composition, writing, baking, and cooking, but I haven’t done most of those in ages tbh.

Just an FYI, I am a perpetually stressed and overbooked college student so I may fall off the face of the Earth every now and then.

Thanks for bearing with me through that mega long monologue. Consider giving me a follow if any of that resonates with you!

[toastandjamie]

Okay so this is genuinely just me screaming into the void, no tags, just word vomit.

So like- I’ve been in the wheel of time fandom for not a super long time, I only finished reading the series itself recently actually, though that was mostly because I procrastinated finish memory of light months lol- the point is, I haven’t been here that long but the experience of being in this fandom has already been a vast improvement from my previous one.

I was in Dream SMP fandom for like, three or four years, because covid and my adhd brain decided Tommyinnit was a serotonin machine. I only really watched a few of the creators on the SMP, and wasn’t really involved in the more- intense parts of the fandom. I enjoyed the fanart, the fan music and the lore discussions. It was genuinely a very good time. But I’ve realized recently just his utterly exhausting and stressful having been hyper fixated and invested in the fandom it was. I didn’t even watch Dream, the majority of the creators I watched weren’t even really ever involved in most drama, I mean some of them rarely if at all interacted with Dream. Yet anytime he got cancelled it would seep into every inch of the fandom and suddenly my feed despite my best efforts to curate would be absolutely unbearable for days on end. I don’t have Twitter, tumblr is really the only social media I use and I was never super involved in the negative aspects so while I never experienced this myself I saw plenty of it. Death threats, doxxing and just generally incredibly unpleasant behavior from people inside the fandom and out. I STILL get anxious mentioning the fact that I like the Sorry Boys and LoveJoy lest someone accuses me of being a Dream stan of all things. Not because I have any strong feelings about Dream, because I don’t. I never cared about the guy, but everything he did somehow reflected on everyone. This weird “guilty by association” thing.

My interest steadily waned as a got into Wheel of Time and then the SMP ended and I stopped participating in the fandom now fully invested in WoT. Some of the creators I still watch and like but I’m no longer invested. And something I noticed was how much less stressful it’s been. Maybe it’s just because I’m on tumblr but everyone has been so kind and the worst discourse I’ve seen is about whether or not the show is good which is a vastly different vibe then the near constant vitriol that proliferated the DSMP fandom. Maybe it’s because the fandoms older, or maybe it’s just because I’m on tumblr only but I’ve really enjoyed the interactions and conversations I’ve had since joining the fandom. And when I tell you the relief I felt when Dream got himself cancelled again and I didn’t feel a pit in my stomach because it’s no longer relevant to me. Bliss. Pure bliss. It is well and truly, not my circus not my monkeys.

[ahhshoelah]

I didn’t expect grief. When I received my official ADHD diagnosis, I was ready to point my finger at everyone who ever called me lazy or selfish or unmotivated, ready to hold myself back from screaming the validity of my feelings into an unfeeling void. I had expected to feel a weight lifted. I had expected to gain hope. But I didn’t expect grief.

When the diagnosis was confirmed, the relief I felt was immediate. Finally an answer after all the questions I had been asking myself since I had had my first conscious thought. When the relief left me, anger took its place—what other emotion could I conjure when I heard the echoes of my loved ones telling me to just try a little harder, be a little better, give a little more. I was always trying harder. I was always one piece of straw away from breaking my back on the box they wanted to put me in. They weren’t allowed to be sorry. I didn’t want to let it go. I knew in my heart that I would forgive them, but my anger remained.

Somewhere though, a drop of grief bubbled up through the anger. Small at first, a gentle pop, just a whisper. That whisper soon became the small voice that had asked and begged and pleaded for help, clear as a bell. The echoes faded into the background as I shifted attention to her. Familiar, the quiet voice of the small girl rang. The unheard song of a girl who cried every time she couldn’t string the words together to express her feelings. The sensitive one, who felt too deeply, loved too carelessly and needed too much. The girl who tried to wear her traumas like a mask, an armor, to keep her safe. She was me, quiet and sensitive and unheard. 

I mourned the person she would have been if there were words to tell her story, to sing her song. It was a deep loss, seeing fleeting images of the person I might have been with the tools to help me through the worst challenges. Someone free of the torment of being trapped inside her head, someone with self-love and confidence. I mourned her. I took off my mask and so did she. The grief was so loud, an echoing cacophony, and so consuming that I hadn’t even realized that she was just my reflection. She was me.   

She said ‘thank you’, and I felt it like a vibration in every one of my bones. The echoes were scattered to the wind. Every hurt, every struggle, every tear shed broke free in one moment like some great steam vent screaming triumphantly toward the sky. I was allowed to say it wasn’t easy. I was forgiven for my shortcomings and allowed to finally see myself without donning the mask or the armor. The reflection was me and I was her and we were battle-worn and ready to recover. Now, I have to tell her story. My story. 

I didn’t expect grief, but I did learn from it.

______________________________________________

**Self-diagnosis is valid.**

Self-forgiveness is a powerful tool. You are the only one who is fighting your fight. Wear your armor today, equip your tools and remember to love yourself. I’m proud of you, exactly as you are right now. I will love you just the same when you take off your mask. Tomorrow will be here sooner than you expect, so keep your chin up.

[jungkoode]

kikiiii you seem so so knowledgeable in psychology, could you maybe recommend some readings / books??

Anon, first of all—thank you so much! That’s such a kind thing to say, and I’m honestly honored you think I sound knowledgeable, because most days I feel like a madman googling “why does my brain do that” at idk 7am in the morning???

But here’s the thing: I’m not a licensed professional. I’m just a big ol’ nerd with an obsessive need to understand everything my therapists and psychiatrists tell me, so I go down rabbit holes with every concept they mention. Most of what I’ve read has come from them—recommended specifically for me, tailored to my experiences, symptoms, and needs.

And that’s actually why I don’t give out book or article recs. Psychology is so deeply personal. The best resources depend on what you’re trying to explore—trauma, ADHD, attachment theory, emotional regulation, etc.—and even then, not every resource fits every person. What helped me might be unhelpful (or even harmful) to someone else.

So if you’re interested in diving deeper (which I LOVE and fully support!!), I genuinely recommend reaching out to a therapist or psychologist if you have access. They can suggest books, academic papers, and even theses that match your brain and journey. That way you’re getting reliable, safe, and context-specific guidance, not just a Tumblr gremlin with a God complex and too many notebooks telling you what rocked her boat.

That said… if you ever just want to talk concepts or theories casually, I’m always down to scream into the void about attachment styles or executive dysfunction or the psychology of repression. I’m just not gonna prescribe your reading list like I’m your neurodivergent professor. Deal?

[laurafaritos]

HDMS047. You Wrote It Once and It’s Still Working — That’s Owned Media Magic

Most of what we post online disappears in 24 hours—or worse, gets buried by an algorithm in 24 seconds.

Owned media doesn’t play by those rules.

That’s what this week’s lesson from Harvard’s Digital Marketing Strategy course made clear: when you own the content, it doesn’t just work once. It can work again. And again. And again.

One well-written blog post, one strong podcast episode, one solid email sequence—these things can live on, pulling in new audience members or converting fans months (or even years) after you hit publish.

This module focused on why owned media is such a powerful channel, not just for brands like OOFOS, but for creators like me. This post breaks down what I learned, how I’m thinking differently now, and why this kind of slow-burn strategy might be the most sustainable move for comedians and creatives.

This submodule was all about the specific advantages of owned media, and honestly, it kind of felt like a love letter to sustainable content.

We checked back in with OOFOS, the recovery footwear brand, to see how their owned media strategy was doing. The results were kind of amazing:

Owned media (like email, blogs, organic social) brought in only 25% of total traffic, but that 25% generated 30% of their revenue.

That means fewer people, making more purchases—aka, a much more efficient channel.

Kate Laliberte, Head of Ecommerce at OOFOS, explained that owned media gives them total control: they can decide what to say, when to say it, and who to say it to. That level of flexibility isn’t possible with paid ads or unpredictable social platforms.

Sunil Gupta broke it down even further:

Owned media works at every stage of the funnel:

Top: blog posts + SEO for discovery

Middle: emails + long-form content for education

Bottom: persuasive copy + CTAs for conversion

It’s perfect for creative storytelling, like REI’s long-form YouTube documentaries (real people, real vibes, not a hard sell)

Here’s a quick rundown of the benefits:

Full control over messaging and timing

Consistent brand tone and voice

Stronger long-term relationships with customers

Value across the entire funnel

No ongoing cost once the content is created

No algorithm interference

More trust from audiences who choose to subscribe or follow

For a content-obsessed person like me, this was a wake-up call: one good post can do more than ten rushed ones.

This module didn’t just teach me about owned media—it gave me permission to slow down.

As someone who’s both autistic and ADHD, the constant pressure to be “on” and always posting can feel impossible. Social media moves fast. Algorithms reward consistency, but punish unpredictability—like taking a break, or needing more time to think, or not being in the mood to scream into the void every day.

Owned media? It doesn’t expect that from me.

This idea that I can make something once—a thoughtful blog post, a well-structured podcast episode, a solid “about me” page—and it can keep working for me without me chasing it down again and again? That’s revolutionary.

It means I can spend time making something I actually like, without the pressure to remix it five different ways in the same week just to get attention.

It means I can set up systems and content that meet people where they are, when they’re ready—not when the feed says it’s time.

It means I don’t have to chase my audience. I can invite them into a space I’ve built to last.

Here’s the thing about owned media: it’s not just for brands with marketing teams. It’s for anyone who’s tired of fighting for visibility every single day.

If you’re a comedian or creator, here’s how you can start using it to your advantage:

Think evergreen. Instead of always making content for “right now,” start making content that stays useful. A “start here” page, a bio that actually explains what you do, a pinned podcast episode that gives people a clear entry point.

Use social media to send people somewhere that’s yours. Don’t just let Instagram or TikTok be the final destination. Link to your site. Promote your email list. Archive your best work in a place that’s searchable and permanent.

Make your content reusable. One strong story or bit can become a blog, a newsletter, a show opener, a TikTok, a press blurb. You don’t need to reinvent the wheel—you just need to own the wheelhouse.

Don’t wait for someone to “discover” you. Create the discovery engine yourself. Whether it’s SEO, email, or long-form YouTube content—start leaving digital breadcrumbs that lead back to your work.

Owned media is how you stop chasing and start curating. It’s how you shift from hoping people find you to actually building the infrastructure for them to land and stay.

I used to think the only way to stay relevant was to keep shouting louder and more often. But now I get it:

Good content isn’t always loud—it’s lasting.

Owned media gives you a way to show up without burning out. To build something once and let it keep serving you. To stop chasing temporary attention and start creating durable connection.

So next time you’re tempted to rush out another story or throw together another promo post, ask yourself—can I build something that works harder and longer than I do?

That’s the magic of owned media.

And I’m finally learning how to use it.

I hope this post was as helpful to you as it was to me <33

Tchau tchau <33

[fl0rescer8]

Hi

It’s been 2 years since I first started this page. I thought it would be a good time to re-introduce myself.

I started this blog to use as an outlet for writing whatever is on my mind. It has helped me when I have been in a writing slump and have a hard time writing my thoughts down on paper. It feels nice to share here as if I’m screaming into the void.

I am a proud advocate of mental health and wellness and aspire to break the stigma behind mental illnesses.

I live daily with depression, anxiety, ADHD, carpel tunnel, chronic pain, migraines, PMDD, dysautonomia.

Some of my interests/hobbies include: listening to music, coloring, painting, scrapbooking, puzzles, photography, nature, hiking, edits/graphic design, skin care, cleaning, watching disney movies.

Favorite color(s): Green, Brown, Purple

Favorite music genres: Latin, Indie, Pop, Rock, Hip-Hop, Lo-fi

Favorite movie genres: action, thriller, comedy

I hope to build a community and help someone feel less alone.

[aditudenal]

is 2025 the year i bring my tumblr out of a drought and post because who doesn’t love screaming into the void? maybe.. we’ll see

y’all i never should’ve looked up how to read my old tumblr posts because my 15 year old self sure was something. crazy how i never believed in astrology much when i was younger, but when you look at the pattern of sad and longing posts followed by one where i’m ranting and reading someone to filth and saying im going to get my life together; pisces sun, pisces moon, sagittarius rising just makes sense. also a bitch lovessss a comma, like really just loves to use some commas and still does and i’m not going to do anything different about it so here we are.

anyway, i wish my big feelings at 30 were the same as they were at 15. like, i wish my biggest problems were that my mom was pissed and this boy i liked was leading me in an endless circle of “i like you, oh wait.. no i don’t.” spoiler alert for BOTH of you: you’re both gay, so anyway.

i also wish i could go tell 15 year old me that it’s going to be okay. that there are words like autism and adhd and anxiety that are going to make sense of what you’re feeling. that right now you’re laying in bed next to the absolute love of your life who you get to marry and are coming up on 3 years of being married later this year. that life doesn’t end at 20 or 21 or 25 or 26 or 29 and being 30 is not the worst thing that’s ever happened to you. that being gay is okay and you are gay, and maybe if you accepted the way you felt about the girl from band camp and took a step back from your “faith” earlier you would be dealing with less complications and trauma from comp het. that there’s more genders than simply “boy” and “girl” and you’ve finally in recent years discovered that you are in fact, nonbinary and nothing has ever felt as comfy as they/them pronouns do.

it’s also so crazy to me that some things still apply to both of us; that i am still so close to that 15 year old me in so many ways. i still have the same nostalgia and sentimental nature. i still listen to some of the same music. i still sing when i think no one is listening and like to fantasize about what i’d post on a day in the life if i was a vlogger. i’m also still vegetarian mostly for the plot and spite of it all, despite most definitely being anemic and not eating enough protein (but we’re working on it.)

anyway, here i am to essentially scream at the wall and into the void and put my thoughts on the internet because like who even cares about their digital footprint anymore, right? happy 2025, y’all.