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navydoves · 14 days ago

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Blood Bag — Chapter 2

“Does it hurt?”

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✎ᝰ. summary. you’re a vampire, you need blood. sylus is the most powerful man on this side of the planet. he has what you need.

✎ᝰ. cw. you’re a vampire/sylus is a human, yearning sylus, depressed sylus, lonely sylus, luke and kieran are side characters, not unrequited but maybe a little, ANGSTY, erotica, lots of pining here bro, sylus is currently getting more pathetic! ✎ᝰ. wc. 6.7k

✎ᝰ. a/n. alright a little bit overdo for a second chapter but here it is! hoorrraaay! sorry for the delay, i’m still a student and i do this in my free time. if you have any questions about the story, i answer all dms so feel free. this is not proof read because i wanted to get it out asap but i will try n fix things as time goes on. hope this chapter is satisfactory to you all and if anyone wants to be tagged for chapter 3, lmk!

chapter 1

he couldn’t believe he was in this position right now, both literally and figuratively. cradling the soft hair of this vampire’s head and pushing them further into the crevice of his neck, encouraging them to suck blood that even his enemies didn’t have privilege of seeing.

that first sink of your fangs stung a lot more than any normal nicks he’d gotten, but his body didn’t flinch away. he barely made a face as the room filled with groaning and slurping noises, all coming from you and your eager, insatiable hunger.

he thought maybe a few minutes of sucking would be enough time—enough blood—to pull you away and finally start questioning you, but you were insistent. and sylus, he was generous.

you were pawing at his chest, gripping onto his shirt and anchoring yourself closer as you reveled in what was the best blood to ever cross your tongue. you didn’t have the mental capacity to think about how he wasn’t pulling you away, how he just sat there compliant in your feeding. even when blood dripped down his neck and collarbones he made no move to clean it. he just held you.

but that generosity is why you were able to survive, and why the two of you are here where you are now.

his voice is a low rumble, interrogative but not angry. “who are you?” sylus asks once you finally pull back. he mentally remarks how much better you look, health gracing your face in a way that wasn’t there minutes earlier. you turn your head. defiant? maybe. scared? he wouldn’t believe it. “speak up. you don’t get to choose when and how you’re fearful. you weren’t hesitant when you broke into here, you don’t get to be hesitant now.”

he hooks a finger under your chin and turns your face to face his. one of his eyes glow, you notice, but that wasn’t your issue right now. you say your name quietly and it causes an identifiable feeling to sprout in sylus’s chest. it seemed so familiar… but it wasn’t the name on the report.

he holds up the slightly crumpled paper to you, eyes piercing into yours as if daring you to lie. “and who is this?” he sees you avert your gaze again but before he could force your face back to him, you answer.

“me.”

it takes a few moments but an incredulous chuckle escapes sylus throat. “can you see why i’m a little confused then?” he rasps, frustration lining his voice. all this time. “what’s a dead girl from philos doing in my fucking house? ah sorry, supposed to be dead.” sylus leans in closer, his hot breath crowding your face and forcing you to back up into the corner. “and you fucking bit me. you bit me in hopes of turning the strongest man in the n109 zone into a vampire, but guess what sweet thing? it didn’t fucking work. i’ll bring your dead body back to whomever you work for and show them myself how much of a fucking failure they are. would you like that? because death is mercy compared to what they’ve done to you.”

the monologue does little to disturb you, sylus notices. you instead keep still with your eyes squinted and brows furrowed, like you were a little disgusted at him and his threats. but whatever you were feeling was irrelevant to sylus. how you got yourself here and why was the only thing on his mind.

he was near seething at this point. seeing the stress he’s dealt with over the last several weeks be given a face and a weakness was nirvana itself for him. all the ways he could make you suffer and make an example out of you; he could show all other nations just exactly how to deal with a vampire.

“silence huh? it’s fine, i can play the long game,” sylus grins. you were still unmoving but there was unspoken emotion in your eye. behind what seemed like disgust, you looked a bit defeated. and despite wanting to explore what you were hiding, sylus couldn’t bring him to stare at your eyes for too long. it was painful. it felt painful, like he knew those eyes and that pain too well.

sylus stands, grabs you by the nape of your cloak, and almost drags you out of the room. he was so sick and tired of this, he needed a break even if he did also need answers.

“luke, kieran,” sylus mumbles while stepping out of his office door, you stumbling behind him. “take her to security and confine her in a silver cage. any and every camera in there should be pointed at her. keep the lights low, i don’t want to kill her yet.”

the twins perk up seeing sylus and the strange, staggering girl. when they caught her she could barely walk or fight back, but now she was up on two feet.

“silver? lights?” luke mumbles, not believing the conclusion he was about to come to.

“vampire,” kieran finishes that thought telepathically.

both their faces were a little horrified-looking. a vampire? here? in their estate? the same string of questions that crossed sylus earlier was now being shared by the twins.

“wait but, h—“

sylus raises his hand and cuts kieran off. “i gave you orders, none of which say ‘ask sylus questions.’ take her there, do what i asked and then come back up. no interrogating, no torturing, nothing. you speak to me only.”

the twins exchange a glance and nod imperceptibly before moving toward you and hooking you tightly against their bodies with their arms. without question, without fuss, they stumble you to the elevator and give sylus one last concerned look before disappearing from the hall.

sylus stays still for several moments before grasping at his hair and groaning.

“fuck me.”

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“she… she bit you?” luke whispers.

kieran wasn’t able to even formulate words at the impossible scenario, but this was neither impossible nor a scenario, it was the reality.

“she did… twice,” sylus responds, his hands rubbing at his face. after weeks of high stress all he could do now was sit in his exhaustion and not even triumph in catching his prey. and sylus loved catching his prey. “but… i let her the second time. the first time, i don’t know how or when but she got to me but i was asleep. the second time was just now. she was dying and… i couldn’t let the vermin perish without knowing how she infiltrated the n109 zone and the estate.”

the twins stay uncharacteristically still while they absorbed sylus’s words. the quarantining and stalking of the house was finally being explained to them; a vampire under their noses this whole time.

“so then… boss are you…” luke continued, “are you… a vampire now?”

there was tense silence between the three. “no, i’m not. a dragon like me can’t be taken down so easily, but i do feel weaker.” he sighs, sitting up and looking to the ceiling. “not just physically, but mentally. like i’ve been duped and that i’ve gone soft. she got me in a weak spot i didn’t know i had, and i hate having weak spots.”

with his head angled up, kieran could see the fresh bite mark on sylus’s neck. it made him wince. “what’re you gonna do then?” he asks softly.

sylus gives the question a few moments of thought. torture was almost a guaranteed way to get anyone to talk, but he still wasn’t a fan of that idea even to a nuisance like you. your refusal to speak could mean an indefinite amount of things. as hypocritical as it was; maybe you were scared. or maybe you (rightfully) didn’t trust sylus, or you were still dying, or that you didn’t want to give up the name of the people you were working with. if you were with others anyway—that conclusion was one sylus came up with on his own. but how could you not? this couldn’t have been a one-woman-show.

“i don’t know…” sylus exhales, “i’m going to get what i need to out of her, but this entire thing is… more than complicated. i do know what we aren’t going to do, though.” the twins lean in a bit interested as sylus readjusts himself. “we aren’t going to torture her. we have to keep her at least stable. she can’t start withering away under our noses and all of the sudden, next day we walk in on a dead vampire in my house.”

luke glances down as if he didn’t really like the idea. “sounds like we’re treating her more like a guest and not an intruder,” he mumbles, “an intruder that tried to turn you, by the way.”

“luke,” sylus warns, “listen i don’t need the remarks, okay? i know… it’s not what you guys want but we can’t just kill her and… i just can’t bring myself to torture her. it’s never been my sort of play and it’s not now.”

another tense silence follows.

“so then…” kieran whispers, “how’re you gonna keep her ‘stable’?”

“as long as we keep the lights low and give her blood—“ sylus cuts himself off. fuck, blood. you need blood. you need blood to survive and he can’t just give you half-assed meals to eat. you’re a vampire, that’s the whole fucking issue here. “listen,” he continues, “let me worry about the logistics. i don’t want you two going near her until i deem it safe. god forbid you two get hurt in someway, it’ll be in my conscience until i die myself.”

the twins perk up slightly. “really? you’d care if we got hurt or died?” luke asks almost cheerfully. kieran simply looks at his brother to reprimand him.

“i’m not gonna entertain that question,” sylus gruffs. “all i ask of you two is for some space while i consider where to go from here. if i need your help, ill come to you, but for the most part, just go on about your duties like normal. is that understood?”

the twins look at each other and then back at sylus before giving him a slight nod of understanding. being asked to pretend like everything was normal when there was a vampire a few floors down was insanity to them, but they knew better than to fight their boss on this. sylus needed his time, and they trusted him to effectively handle this.

“alright, boss,” kieran sighs softly, “but if your condition gets any worse, tell us okay? we at least wanna be there for you. y’know… even if we can’t do anything about it.”

the twins slump slightly—kieran’s word came off a lot more solemn they he intended. boss wouldn’t die, right? they hoped boss was stronger than a few vampire bites. but that look on boss's face did not quell their anxieties. that look of pure exhaustion.

instead of fighting them on their insistence, sylus simply nods at the two, acknowledging their care for him even if he felt it unnecessary. he motions for them to leave his office and doesn’t bother wishing them a goodnight. the last thing on his mind was pleasantries.

alone, in his office, with nothing but his thoughts and an aching body affected by the vampire bite, sylus was unsure of what to do next. he had to talk to her, of course, but how to was the issue. another issue was just how to feed her.

former hostages, criminals, suspects, all that galore didn’t compare to this simple vampire. because at least with them, coaxing the truth with threats and humiliation came easily. humans were easy to crack, but vampires? maybe not this one.

when his eyes glance over it, sylus immediately goes back to the discarded death report on the side of the room. this was another thing he wasn’t sure how to interpret. was this another fake report? but no, you said it yourself, this was you. well this was supposed to be you. a human from philos.

staring at the paper would do him no justice, though, and the answers had to come directly from you otherwise he would find dead ends all day. so for the time being, he would just… be calm. the ache from the bite was still strumming through sylus’s veins and he needed it gone before he could make his way to you. no way was he gonna let you see your effect on him, he’d already been humiliated in your wake once.

sylus stands, moves over to the black and red encrusted mirror on the wall, and faces a man he no longer recognizes. today that man would become more of a stranger.

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clink, clank, clink, clank.

those were the sounds of sylus’s boots stepping down the stairs to the security room where you were kept away. he opted for the stairs and not the elevator to give himself time to… think, of course. he wasn’t stalling. he had no reason to… this is just some silly vampire that he could deal with. just another obstacle in his life that would make him stronger, coming out the end of it.

at the bottom of the stairs, he sighs. the air was already tense with the sound of generators and electricity humming throughout. he knew you were in there, he could see you vaguely from the door separating the stairs and the room. you were quiet as a mouse and still as a possum. he hoped what he had would change that, make you more lively to talk.

in one hand was a silver box filled with jars of animal blood that he hoped you would drink for food. in the other hand was a notepad and pen, something for you to use to write if you refused to verbally speak. if you could write at all.

it took him a few more moments of “thinking” before he decided to step into the room. his strides were long and calm, no doubt or hesitation in his movements. he knew better than to come off as anything but confident. he was confident and still all the more irritated at the situation.

outside of your silver cage he pulls a rogue wheely chair and sits on it quietly before setting his things down. he could see your face peeking out of your hood, scanning his lower half.

there’s a heavy silence between the two of you. it was understood that you weren’t going to speak first anyway, so the man across from you took that liberty.

“are you hungry?” sylus asks lowly, not concern in his voice but a neutral tone for a very simple question. as expected, you don’t answer. he reaches down to the silver box and clicks it open. one by one, he places the jars of blood in front of your cage, just out of your reach. “i have blood here, ready for you. i’ll give you some morsels… but your vow of silence will prevent me from doing so. you should understand it’s in your best interest to speak.”

no reply. he sees just slight interest in your very subtle movements, but nothing more. the jars are in eyeshot of your vision, but whether it be disinterest or defiance, you weren’t making any attempts at them.

sylus places the box down and picks up the pad and pen. he slides it through the slivers between bars around your cage, right where you can reach it. “if this vow of silence is so important to you,” he drones on, “then it’d be easier for you to write. either way, i’m the only one who can keep you alive now. you know how desperate you were for blood just yesterday, it wasn’t a fun feeling was it? starvation. so i’d advise you to communicate if you want to avoid that pain.”

sylus inches one of the jars to you with his foot, watching carefully how you react. for several moments you were perched the same—huddling at the farthest edge from him in your cloak, hiding your form and face from him. but in the next second, you were moving. with one snatch you took the jar from the other edge and just when sylus thought you were about to scarf it all down, you instead threw it to the side of the cage and smashed it into pieces. blood was now soaked onto the floor and dripping down the bars, some of it on your cloak.

from under your hood, sylus could see seething anger from your eyes. in the short time he’s known you, he’s seen you desperate, upset, fearful, disgusted, and now angry. the sudden violence took sylus aback for a moment, but he recovered quickly.

he scoffed. “throwing a fit now? i’m not here to talk morals with a vampire but i don’t know if you have the right to be angry when you’re the cause of all of your problems.” sylus tilts his head and taps the side of his cheek with a slow, pondering finger. “there goes one of your meals. i won’t be providing more so think rationally before you break another jar.”

sylus watches you tentatively now. you were so interesting and annoying all at the same time. he couldn’t let you starve to death, so his words were more-so puffery—somewhat lies. he couldn’t say that he was desperate for your answers because it gave you the power, and you’ve had enough power over him at this point.

he had to play his cards right. he couldn’t seem too soft, but he couldn’t threaten you too much because he wouldn’t be able to go through with threats. you’d catch onto his bluff real quick. if you were to break all the jars, what was he gonna do next? go back on his word and give you more? an unfortunately smart vampire like you would just continue using him.

but thankfully… he didn’t need to do all that overthinking.

“i don’t want this… fucking animal blood,” you grit out lowly.

for the first time, sylus was hearing your real, normal voice. not the voice that was dried up and begging for blood and not the meek one you used to point yourself out on the report. a full, hearty voice. a voice he… felt distantly familiar in his chest somewhere. but sylus tries not to let his surprise show.

“so, you’d rather starve?” he chuckles, “i’m fine with that. means i won’t feel guilty when you die cause it’ll be a death by suicide.”

he wasn’t fine with that.

“you’re not fine with that.”

sylus raises a brow. you pull your cloak back and let your true anger show in the very dim light of the security room. you still looked healthy and nourished, at least enough to give you this newfound energy you had. what a soft face for such a cruel creature.

“i don’t plan on starving,” you continue, “but i don’t plan on drinking animal blood. it has no nutritional value to me.”

another low laugh rips from sylus’s chest. “you think you have the right to be picky as well? may i remind you where you are and who you’re speaking to? this is the last sovereignty on earth to be so pompous. humor me then, how do you plan on surviving?”

a beat, then your voice. “sylus,” you whisper rather softly.

“huh?” sylus grumbles.

“that’s who i’m speaking to, but that’s also how im gonna survive. im gonna survive off of you. your blood.”

sylus takes a moment to just simply stare at you and take in your indignation before a small fit of laughter broke into him. it welled up from a few chuckles to a genuine and hearty sound from his chest, pure amusement and disbelief lacing every sound. you simply stare back, annoyed and somewhat unsure of what to make of the situation.

“i’m being serious.”

“i’m aware, and that’s why it’s funny,” sylus retorts. “you’re trying to use my own desperation against me like i’m feeble enough to just give into your demands. let me take a little guess. you want my blood so that in exchange, i get information out of you? yeah? not a chance.”

sylus would be lying if he said he didn’t already consider this deal. he figured that if there was any negotiation between you two, it would have something to do with him being generous with you. you had something he wanted; so despite you being the one in the cage, you were leading this discussion—and he didn’t like that.

“i’m not quite sure why you’re laughing like the idea is outlandish,” you respond with a slightly offended tone. “it’s not like you can’t take it. for the things i could tell you, a few pints of blood to hold me over is cheap. sylus, head of onichynus and overseer of the n109 zone, turning down a bargain that could uplift his sovereignty to even greater heights… because he can’t part with some blood? pathetic.”

sylus’s amusement quickly falters at your words. your words could be bluff or exaggerated, he wouldn’t be able to tell anyway. at the very least you had some insight on him and his sovereignty enough to speak with such familiarity. i mean, fuck, you made it into his estate—if anything you knew intimate details about his own personal life.

sylus tilts his head in irritation and bares his teeth slightly. “i’m sure you didn’t come all the way here to give me some sort of extraordinary intel out of the goodness of your heart. you broke in and bit me, not much of a conversation there.”

you smirk slightly. “it’s true, i came here for your blood. but i also didn’t come here to share my life story with you. i’m only negotiating now because i’ve been caught.”

blood? fuck, he was one step into the door now. a motive—he has some sort of motive as to why you’re here, but that answer of yours only begs more questions. why his blood specifically? it didn’t seem like you wanted it because of his status, but what other reason could you have.

“my blood?” sylus repeats mockingly. “surely a quick-witted, mouthy vermin like you could get her hands on any human that walks by. there are two healthy young men in my estate, blood surely fresher than mine. the n109 zone is filled with young vigilantes with blood surely more course than mine. and not to mention… philos—if that is your birthplace—is populated by high-ranking officials and families, with blood surely sweeter than mine. and yet, you’ve chosen me? why have i been hexed?”

there’s a slight flicker of dejection in your expression that adds such a human element to you. every new emotion in your face feels so utterly familiar to sylus, it was starting to feel uncomfortable.

“i think you know why i chose you,” you whisper back.

“what?”

there was silence from you now. of course there was. you were still playing games with him and for him to play with you, it would cost him some blood. in the silence that ensues, sylus considers your words. what did he have that regular humans didn’t? apart from his status and power, what could make him a target for blood?

and then.

an idea hits him.

but it was… unfathomable.

he could almost feel the horns growing on the sides of his head, the cold scales prickling at his skin, the phantom tail moving behind him. that body that he once was was luxurious but also all the more hated. luke and kieran were born from a human woman. the vigilantes in the n109 zone were unreformed, outcasted humans from other nations. philos was regal, but not divine. their people and rulers were all human.

but sylus… sylus is a dragon.

or at least, was.

he furrows his brows and eyes you down in your cage. you meet his gaze with an equally challenging look. there was unspoken tension between you two, secrets that both of you were unsure how or if to unravel.

you broke the tension first.

“i need blood,” you whisper. “i’m getting hungry again and i wither away quickly. i don’t want whatever pigs blood you’ve brought. stop fighting me, just give me what i need.”

another short silence.

“i have every weapon you could imagine perfected in silver and stocked up in this very room,” sylus states very, very carefully. he gestures to the crates around them. “if i sense even the slightest bit of threat from you, i kill you with no hesitation. and i will do it in the most painful way possible.”

you simply look at him, resolute unshaken. you nod.

with no words to continue his threat, sylus reached into his jacket pocket and takes out a small knife foldable knife. he clicks it out and brings it to his palm for a cut before your voice stops him.

“no,” you jut in rather loudly, “i need it… from the source. it’s not as good otherwise.”

sylus opens his mouth to denounce that idea but your voice once again stops him. a small, almost pitiful, and unusually earnest, “please” that falls from your lips. he stills with the knife against his palm for a few more moments before clicking it back and putting it away. while at the beginning of all this, giving into your demands would’ve been humiliating, the idea of you knowing about his past is even more so. so now, it’s easy to unlock the door to your cage and gesture you to come to him.

and you, so as to not wear him out or risk your life, come to him slowly and quietly. once close, gently, you climb his lap and tilt your head into his neck. his scent was all too familiar to you, it almost made you sob right there, but your hunger was more pronounced.

the bite was a soft and almost imperceptible nick to sylus’s throat, followed by the sting of your sinking fangs.

the only thing sylus could do at this point was wait until you had your fill like he did when he first caught you. you weren’t as loud as the day before, though. instead of desperate slurping and groaning, you were quietly gulping with soft sighs to accompany it.

he felt quite humbled by letting this happen to him, but at this point, maybe it was too late for him to care that much.

sylus felt the crowd of your body against his as you sank in for more. he was unsure of what to do with his hands so, with a bit of resignation, he placed them on your hips and savored your familiar warmth against his body.

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two crow masks were discarded to the middle of the couch. luke and kieran faced each other on opposite ends of it.

“do you think he’ll be okay?” luke asks softly. him and his brother spent the last few hours after they put the vampire away, worrying and mulling the situation over.

“we’ve seen boss get through worse. he’ll be alright. there’s no reason to worry luke,” kieran responds trying to reassure. except, the worry between them didn’t let up one bit.

“but has he been through worse? forget conflicts and trade wars and everything else between the sovereignties. no one has gotten to boss this personally before. i mean… almost killing him? kieran…”

“luke,” kieran sighs softly, “you saw him. two vampire bites and he’s still holding up. i can’t think of anyone else who could do that. we can worry all we want but… but it’s not our place to do anything. boss won’t listen to our advice anyway.” kieran rubs his face and perches his chin on his palm. a soft sigh escapes him. “plus… he has his own weird way of caring for us. he won’t let us help ‘cause he worries we’ll be like… traumatized or something.”

luke chuckles just slightly, “at least he cares.”

the twins both laugh a little painfully at the slightly morbid humor. they meet eyes, their identical faces mirroring identical expressions of exhaustion.

“what’d’you think he’s doing now?” kieran asks.

“hm, probably threatening her with all his weapons to get a confession or something.” luke responds.

well it wasn’t going to be that difficult.

“does it hurt?” you ask softly while looking at sylus through the bedroom mirror. you were sat decorously at the small round table in the room, glancing over to sylus who was standing before the mirror and patching up the bite mark.

“doesn’t matter, don’t small talk me,” he responds straightly.

after a few more moments of ensuring the bandage patch was securely on, sylus strode to the small table where you were sat quietly. apart from your need for blood, there was unfortunately nothing odd about you. the politeness was strange. he doesn’t waste any time.

“how did you get in here?” sylus presses.

you glance around, a little unsure of how exactly to answer this. “well, you. you told me,” you respond.

sylus knits his brows together and almost laughs. he shakes his head incredulously. “no i didn’t. how did you get in here?” he repeats.

“the bar,” you state simply. “you were at a bar a about a week ago. you were downing shots and racking up a tab. first ten or so it was my coworker who served you, then it was me. unprovoked, you started complaining about the renovations of your home. i simply continued asking questions and you… well you essentially told me the security was off until they were done. i asked you at some point how you’d get home so drunk and you told me the numbers of your chauffeurs. once you were finished with your drinks, i offered to call them and went into the back, got my male coworker to do it, and took off before the renovations were done. i made it just before you did and overheard your… twins? talking about their bedrooms on the fifth floor. so i took a chance and went up there to also find your room, where i hid until you came back home.”

the monologue of your story leaves sylus absolutely bewildered. it was the first time he really was showing something genuine to you. his face was crumpled up in some sort of upset and disbelief, and despite his racing thoughts, he couldn’t really say anything. you both look at each other in practiced silence. what could he make of this?

“you were plotting against me? working for that bar knowing i frequented it to get me at my most vulnerable,” sylus laughs humorlessly, “and you found a blessing just that day.”

you shake your head. “that’s only half true. i wasn’t working there knowing you frequented it. in fact i’d only been there a week before you showed up. but i did take advantage of you and your situation once i had the chance.”

yet another tense silence. sylus couldn’t really believe how direct and open you were being. everything you said seemed honest to him, a man who’d dealt with dishonesty from criminals his whole life. but what sylus couldn’t believe more-so was how much of an idiot he had been. his loose lips and foggy mind haphazardly put him and the twins in danger and he couldn’t even be proud to finally figure out some of the mystery.

“but that doesn’t make sense,” he grits, “you were in the n109 zone as a vampire? we have border security checks for threats. are there fucking more of you?”

he notices how you hesitate to answer. the last thing he needed was for you to say there was some vampire affiliated gang in his sovereignty.

“no, not that i know of,” you respond softly. “i came to the n109 zone a long, long time ago. when i first turned, that is. i came from philos. the outbreak there was bad and there was worldwide panic due to vampirism. after i got bitten, i escaped because i knew if anyone found out i’d be staked immediately. the n109 zone seemed the safest because of its reputation of taking in outcasts. no one would question me here, everyone minds their business. so i’ve lived here for the last… i guess many decades.”

“many decades?” sylus repeats. the disgruntled expression on his face couldn’t properly portray the mess that was his mind. it felt like week after week for the past almost month, he’d been beaten down with a stick and left to lay in exhaustion. his worldview was constantly changing.

“have you killed?!” he barks. “tell me, have you killed anyone for blood?! you’ve killed haven’t you? you’ve gone this many years living under the radar, you’ve surely killed—“

“i haven’t!” you yell, stopping sylus’s growing anger. “i haven’t! i haven’t at all. i’ve been barely getting by with animal blood. fucking… killing rats in alleyways and stray cats and dogs… stuff like that. i’ve rationed frugally, okay? stake me for trying to fucking live, but i’ve never hurt anyone.”

“how do i know that’s true?” sylus breathes out. there’s his eye, glowing again and really boring into you.

“well, i guess you don’t. but maybe you should. this is your nation after all, these are your people after all. if i really did kill someone, maybe you should’ve been fucking aware of it like a good leader. but you don’t know about killings because i didn’t kill. i hid so well and adapted to your society so perfectly that to you and to everyone else, i was human. so don’t go fucking pointing fingers at me saying i did shit i didn’t.”

sylus could feel his heart beating harder now. he was upset at you but more-so himself. but during all these decades, has he stumbled upon you? has he seen your face and heard your voice that now he thinks—

“is that why i recognize you?”

the question immediately shuts you up. he sees you move back into the chair and immediately relinquish any type of aggravation you had. you looked hurt, but he didn’t understand why.

“no… no. i’ve always hid away from you. i made sure i never saw you in person and you never saw me.” you whisper. you could feel a bitter ache in your stomach. he didn’t remember you.

sylus also backs down, sitting back in his chair.

“i need you to answer this again, and i want an honest answer,” he states firmly. “why my blood?”

a long, impending silence follows. sylus is patient. you are worried.

“dragon’s blood. your blood is more potent than any human’s. after decades of living on scraps… i needed it. when i saw the opportunity at the bar i took it, and every single bite afterward felt so, so fucking good. like nothing i’ve ever tasted before. you don’t even understand.”

dragon’s blood.

it was true that sylus was a human now, but his dragon heritage was still apart of him. it was quite literally in his blood, but that heritage was always kept a secret. sylus wouldn’t lie and say he didn’t have that boyish fear of being judged. after all, it has been instilled in him for years. outcasted as a baby dragon to a full grown one, there wasn’t a day where he didn’t face ridicule and torture for being what he was. he wasn’t cruel, but people made him cruel. only faintly did he know happiness and love brought upon a person he can no longer make out.

“why… how… do you know about my…?” sylus trails off. he hasn’t talked about his past in literal eons, and now the topic of this conversation was getting to him. similar to you, there wasn’t bitter ache within him.

“they talked about you in philos, told tales and stories about evil dragons and teach them to the kids, even. i learned about it when i was young. they never specify you, though. i just… um… happen to know.” your whispered truth was only half the truth. you couldn’t bare to be fully honest.

“…do you believe them?” sylus whispers. his eyes were squinted down at the table and searching for an answer in the air. “the stories… tales.”

you shake your head gently. “no. i don’t. and it’s not because i’ve learned differently or something. i just never have.”

sylus takes a moment to consider your words and lift his head back up. this sort of dejection was unfamiliar him, but you seemed to quell that feeling. he’s never met someone accepting of what he was. maybe it was because that disgusting form with horns and tail wasn’t before you now, but he’d take anything.

“why do you want to live?” sylus asks simply. that tired, dull look was back.

you curl your lip in thought. “because… i deserve to? i haven’t hurt anyone. i’ve lived a quiet life. i’ve paid my dues and my sins with my human life. i may be immortal but i will die one day. i’ll choose when that day is. it’s not now.”

i don’t want to be reborn. i don’t want to be reborn.

sylus lets out a small breath of surrender. he couldn’t fight you on this anymore. even with the lingering confusion in his head, you’ve answered most of his questions. a week ago, he’d imagine this moment where he finally reached the end of this mystery to be triumphant and empowering.

but he felt none of that right now. he felt a little empty. unrecognizable. like his weaknesses are loud to everyone around him.

the fog clouds him and through it he can hear your voice.

“sylus,” you whisper.

he looks to you, patient.

“can i have more blood?”

silently, he pushes out his chair and nods.

⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘

“do you think he’s in there?” luke whisper shouts to his brother. they were both huddled at the end of the hallway where the bedrooms were.

“i mean,” kieran whisper shouts back, “we’ve checked his office, the living rooms, the kitchens, the security room, he wasn’t anywhere there. this is the last place.”

“do you think something happened, kieran? i mean that damn vampire girl wasn’t in her cage!”

kieran sighs. “no, i don’t. he’s probably out at base with her or something. we never know what’s going on in his mind, he’s probably out handling this his own way.”

luke exhales in defeat. his brother was right, boss did never clue them in on his plans unless they were directly needed. he always took care of things in a very specific way that only he knew how to do. this whole situation was only worrying them because they did not like the idea of a vampire in their estate. they even made it a routine to check for bites and nicks on their bodies before and after bed, just to be sure.

“okay,” luke stands straight, “let’s just go check his bedroom and we’ll go back to our rooms before he gets mad at us for bothering him. if he’s in there anyway.”

kieran nods at his brother. the two very quietly scuffle down the hall until they were right by sylus’s bedroom door. up until this point, they were next to convinced that he wasn’t in the estate. but that was until they heard noises from behind the door.

voices, but not speech.

one of which was definitely sylus’s but the other of which was unrecognizable. they tense but decide to knock anyway. the sound is soft and non-intrusive, but it did nothing. no one came to the door and the noises didn’t stop.

kieran reaches out to knock again but luke stops him at the wrist. “let’s just…” he trails off while reaching for the doorknob, “go in.”

kieran was unsure but nods anyway. slowly, they open the door all the way in and take a moment to understand the sight they were met with.

you, the girl they recognized as the vampire, perched on sylus’s lap on the bed with your teeth sunk into his neck and sucking like it was your last meal. sylus, their boss, gently petting your head and giving you infrequent pecks to the cheek. it didn’t take long for everyone in the room to stop dead in their tracks and notice what was happening.

they froze. sylus froze. you froze.

“b-boss?”

tl: @seventeen-x , @webshooterrr9 , @theycallmesoup , @satansdaughter123 , @tyasmaple , @jaynawayna , @jadeymeciela , @namjooningera , @phisen , @eepamaawo , @lolaisoffline

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kortac-sweetheart · 13 days ago

Text

i have a hard time saying pet names irl because i feel like my accent makes it sound funny but i loveeee using them over text

projecting it onto simon right now 📡📡📡

he thought he did something wrong at first, you always call him “honey” or “baby” or “darling” or— you get it, over text. practically half of your vocabulary when you text him is a petname, but the moment he gets you on a call he’s always “simon” or “si” to you and it drives him downright insane.

did he forget to turn off the stove before leaving? forget to close the fridge door? forgot your anniversary— like hell he’d do that! so what was it?

he’s stuck between a rock and a hard place here. you don’t look like you’re mad at him (not like you’re ever really mad at him), and he’d rather pull out his own teeth than ask you about it so he’s just suffering in silence, not able to hear you say all those sweet pet names in person.

but it gets to a point, a man could only take so much before he breaks. he asks you about it over text, yes, not in person he has his limits.

ok! i’ll see you soon honey!! (❁´▽`❁) love youuuuu

wait. lovie, i have to ask you something

? yes baby?

why do you never call me pet names in person?

it takes you a little bit to respond, the three bubbles popping up and disappearing over and over. it makes him anxious, god— him. simon riley, who can stare down death itself without even flinching but is now anxiously awaiting his partner’s response to his question about pet names of all things.

what have you done to him? (you are the greatest thing that happened to him.)

the little ding! snaps him out of his anxious ruminating.

haha well i guess it’s just

i think my accent makes it sound weird 😭😭

oh. so that’s what it was. well— that can’t fly anymore, not that he knows about it now. he calls you immediately, of course, desperate to hear you call him something sweet finally.

he’d get on his knees (even if you couldn’t see him) and beg for you to call him anything you desired, anything please— just let him hear you.

“sim—“ you try and start, a little startled at the sudden call.

“none o’ tha lovie, call me something else— please.”

“but i think it’d sound weird—“ he’d do anything to prove you otherwise, anything at all.

“no! no— you won’t you’ll sound great, lemme hear ya dove, please.” he’s never sounded this desperate before.

“ok! ok, fine! simon, bubby, my honey, my dearest… uhm… my love, my darling…ba— baby… …okimdoneloveyoubye!!!”

there’s a very uncharacteristic lovestruck look on his face when you hang up. you sounded absolutely lovely to him. he could die a happy, happy man after that.

you sounded amazing lovie ❤️

wow. simon actually sent an emoji? he’s dead serious about it, huh? wild. but a man in love is a changed one as they say.

really? (๑º ﾛ º๑)

you’re so cute to him. downright adorable actually. he wants to hear you call him all those sweet things for the rest of his life. he needs to get you a ring asap.

yes lovie, really.

would i ever lie to you?

call me all those things when you see me in person, ok? love you. see you soon.

!!!!!!yay!!!!!!!

ok love you baby!!!!!! see you later!!!! (ɔ ˘⌣˘)˘⌣˘ c)♡

super cute indeed. (he’s going to the local jeweler’s after work.)

#leon writes ˖◛⁺⑅♡#if i dont write simon as a loser in love them im not writing him properly #simon riley x reader #cod simon ghost riley #cod simon riley #ghost x reader #cod x reader #simon ghost riley #sooo silly

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cl6teen · 1 year ago

Text

come and see me ❀ ln4

in which everybody knows just how whipped your long distance boyfriend is for you

contains: social media!au, student!reader (21-22), whipped!lando who spoils you a bunch, a short little thing because i love writing for lando, this is purely self indulgent lmao; but to my requests dw im certainly getting to them

📍 rio de janeiro

liked by landonorris, maxfewtrell, bsfsinstagram and 79,477 others

yourinstagram clearly not much studying is being done!

view all comments

landonorris goddamn

landonorris first

bsfsinstagram this is getting out of hand

landonorris 😍😍

landonorris how are you so beautiful??

landonorris hey

yourinstagram hi i have a boyfriend 🥰

landonorris he’s a lucky guy

maxfewtrell please just come visit so that lando can shut up and stop whining about you

liked by yourinstagram

luv4lando lando always having post notifications on for yn is so boyfriend of him 😭😭

user hes literally head over heels for her

oscarpiastri please do your schoolwork

yourinstagram you’re one to talk 😬

liked by yourinstagram, f1bestwags, danielricciardo and 533,266 others

lando.jpg tfw when u miss ur girlfriend but she’s across the world

view all comments

danielricciardo my man my man my man lookin ass

landonorris my girl my girl my girl , and what about it?

yourinstagram i love you 🥰

yourinstagram call me call me call me

landonorris yes ma’am 😍

user lando seems like the type to mention his relationship at any moment and i’m here for it

oscarpiastri he does 😒

landonorris you act like it bothers you

oscarpiastri i just listen because i can’t tell you to shut up

user omg i’ve just gotten into watching f1 but who’s this?

user lando’s girlfriend! he’s head over heels whipped for her

bsfsinstagram please stop facetiming her while we’re trying to study ☹️

user get you a man like lando norris

yourinstagram he’s a one of a kind, but good luck trying!

user nothing was more sweet than watching lando’s post race interview when he said his celebratory plans were going home and facetiming y/n

user need this kind of love in my life asap 😩

my man 🏎️

are you back from the beach?

you

mhm, just made some dinner

wanna see the photos i took?

my man 🏎️

the answer’s the same every time babe

you

i’m screaming into my pillow and kicking my feet rn

my man 🏎️ loved an image

my man 🏎️

holy shit yn

😩😩😩

is that the dress i sent you??

shit, it looks good, you look so good in it

im glad i bought it

you’re the prettiest woman i’ve ever seen

you

lando omg

stop it stop it

my man 🏎️

i cant praise my girlfriend?

i should buy you more things

you

please don’t 😭

this was more than enough i’m so in love with it

my man 🏎️

if i can’t see you i can at least spoil you

i was going to get you a van cleef stack, what colour did you want?

you

lando norris.

i don’t need a van cleef bracelet.

my man 🏎️

what about some heels?

you

you’ve already got me a bunch, my closet is begging for more space

how about you get me podium on your race in singapore?

i cant wait to watch tomorrow

my man 🏎️

well that’s already a guaranteed

i’ll just surprise you 🤍

you

okay love 🤍

liked by landonorris and 231,900 others

yourinstagram come and see me for once (lando)

view all comments

user awe the photo from his stream earlier 🥺

user HELP when he saw that y/n was watching he got so smiley and excited

bsfsinstagram not the partynextdoor lyric

yourinstagram the best of the best

landonorris im coming.

yourinstagram yeah sure 😓

user the period???

danielricciardo is this shade 🤔

yourinstagram most definitely not daniel, get off my page

bsfsinstagram danielricciardo you can get onto mine instead 😍

user realer than real

user does anyone else thinks she’s always too quick to show off her body, like she barely wears any clothing

landonorris shut up

bsfsinstagram shut up

oscarpiastri shut up

danielricciardo shut up

user omg if i was that user i would have no choice but to stop living bc how u get cussed out four times back to back

my man 🏎️

you shouldn’t worry about that comment angel

it’s been a few days, they took it down

you

i know, lots of people say it anyway

it shouldn’t bother me

my man 🏎️

it’s okay if it bothers you

but don’t change because of it

i like what you wear

i actually love it

you

🙄

of course you like it

you like everything about me

my man 🏎️

why wouldn’t it?

you’re so smart and kind

and fucking beautiful

i won the lottery

so don’t change yourself to fit a rando’s wants

who the hell even are they

you

i love you so much

i wish you were here right now

my man 🏎️

yeah, me too

but i got you that gift i was talking about

it should have arrived by now

you

oh i didn’t even notice

my man 🏎️

yeah they said they dropped it off at your door

you

okay i’ll go check, i’ll facetime you in a bit to try it on

liked by bsfsinstagram, mclaren, landonorris and 643,444 others

yourinstagram so he did in fact come and see me…

tagged landonorris

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user lando standing on business norris

liked by yourinstagram

landonorris i hope you liked the gift i sent

yourinstagram i love it so much

danielricciardo are you not the gift in question lando

oscarpiastri ik your grades are cussing you out rn

yourinstagram i’m actually still getting all A’s i’ll have you know

bsfsinstagram parents reunited in brazil!!

yourinstagram 💋💋

liked by yourinstagram, danielricciardo, oscarpiastri and 895,256 others

landonorris 🇧🇷 with this stinker

view all comments

user the differences in their posts are taking me outtt

yourinstagram why would you post that

landonorris why wouldn’t i post that?

user will you be back in time for qatar?

mclaren he better be 😅

danielricciardo this is so girl from ipanema core lando

landonorris shut up mate

oscarpiastri when lando finally sees his girlfriend again and is no longer there to complain 🙏🏻

landonorris you know you miss me

oscarpiastri say hi to yn for me

yourinstagram best boyfriend ever 💋

landonorris only for you 🤍

#f1 fanfic #f1 x reader #lando norris x reader #f1 imagine #f1 smau #f1 x female reader #navigation.#f1 x you #ln4 x reader #lando norris imagine #lando norris x you #f1 x poc!reader

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rivkae-winters · 1 year ago

Text

Edit: the app launched and Is down- I have the initial apology video in a post here and I’m working on getting a full archive of their TikTok up ASAP. I’m letting the rest of this post remain since I do still stand by most of it and also don’t like altering things already in circulation.

Warning for criticism and what I’d consider some harsh to outright mean words:

So I’ve just been made aware of the project known of as ‘lore.fm’ and I’m not a fan for multiple reasons. For one this ‘accessibility’ tool complicates the process of essentially just using a screen reader (something native to all I phones specifically because this is a proposed IOS app) in utterly needless and inaccessible ways. From what I have been seeing on Reddit they have been shielding themselves (or fans of the project have been defending them) with this claim of being an accessibility tool as well to which is infuriating for so many reasons.

I plan to make a longer post explaining why this is a terrible idea later but I’ll keep it short for tonight with my main three criticisms and a few extras:

1. Your service requires people to copy a url for a fic then open your app then paste it into your app and click a button then wait for your audio to be prepared to use. This is needlessly complicating a process that exists on IOS already and can be done IN BROWSER using an overlay that you can fully control the placement of.

2. This is potentially killing your own fandom if it catches on with the proposed target market of xreader smut enjoyers because of only needing the link as mentioned above. You don’t have to open a fic to get a link this the author may potentially not even get any hits much less any other feedback. At least when you download a pdf you leave a hit: the download button is on the page with the fic for a reason. Fandom is a self sustaining eco system and many authors get discouraged and post less/even stop writing all together if they get low interaction.

3. Maybe we shouldn’t put something marketed as turning smut fanfic into audio books on the IOS App Store right now. Maybe with KOSA that’s a bad idea? Just maybe? Sarcasm aside we could see fan fiction be under even more legal threat if minors use this to listen to the content we know they all consume via sites like ao3 (even if we ask them not to) and are caught with it. Auditory content has historically been considered much more obscene/inappropriate than written content: this is a recipe for a disaster and more internet regulations we are trying to avoid.

I also have many issues with the fact that this is obviously redistributing fanfiction (thus violating the copyright we hold over our words and our plots) and removing control the author should have over their content and digital footprint. Then there is the fact that even though the creator on TikTok SAYS you can email to have your fic ‘excluded’ based on the way the demo works (pasting a link) I’m gonna assume that’s just to cover her ass/is utter bullshit. I know that’s harsh but if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck it’s probably a duck.

I am all for women in stem- I’ve BEEN a woman in Stem- but this is not a cool girl boss moment. This is someone naive enough to think this will go over well at best or many other things (security risks especially) at worst.

In conclusion for tonight: I hope this person is a troll but there is enough hype and enough paid for web domains that I don’t think that’s the case. There are a litany of reasons every fanfic reader and writer should be against something like this existing and I’ll outline them all in several other posts later.

Do not email their opt out email address there is no saying what is actually happening with that data and it is simply not worth the risks it could bring up. I hate treating seemingly well meaning people like potential cyber criminals but I’ve seen enough shit by now that it’s better to be safe than sorry. You’re much safer just locking all your fics to account only. I haven’t yet but I may in the future if that is the only option.

If anyone wants a screen reader tutorial and a walk through of my free favorites as well as the native IOS screen reader I can post that later as well. Sorry for the heavy content I know it’s not my normal fare.

#it’s especially insulting the way this is marketed as solving a problem when the solution already exists #ableism #lore.fm #terrible app ideas that shouldn’t happen #serious #accessibility #screen readers #lore.fm should not launch #accessibility tools that are inherently ableist in design #I wish I was making this up

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loserboysandlithium · 1 year ago

Text

Summertime: Billy Hargrove One Shot

18+, explicit sexual content. Minors DNI

Word count: 3.2k

A/N: I had a request for some Bills and my writing brain has been shit lately so I’m moving over an old one shot from wattpad. @billysbot I hope this is okay for now and I’ll get to your request asap. 🤭🖤

*******

Summer. Fucking finally. The warm night air hits your face as you walk outside towards the cooler searching for something to help you relax. Parties weren’t always your favorite thing but it was a good way to kick off the summer. A nice time to relax and one of the only fun things to do here.

You check out the scene, a crowd of people around the keg stand, a group by the fire, and a few girls fighting for the attention of Steve Harrington.

He is one handsome guy. You watch as he runs his fingers through his fluffy brown hair, the girl directly in front of him reaching out to touch it, giggling flirtatiously as he gives her a sweet smile. Even after graduation, Steve always threw the best parties in Hawkins.

You suddenly hear a shout from your left as you grab yourself a beer, popping it open.

“The keg king has returned!” a guy shouts in the distance.

Tommy. You roll your eyes, the noise from the party already starting to give you a slight headache. I need more alcohol.

“Billy Hargrove, what did we do to deserve this?” another loud voice booms, followed by a laugh.

The name catches your attention and your head whips around to see him standing there with a bold smile on his face.

He looks about the same. Tight denim clinging to his muscular thighs. He turns and you catch a glimpse of his ass, his jeans showing you every curve perfectly.

That ass. You quickly finish your beer, this time reaching for the whiskey, pouring a bit into your cup before walking a little closer to all the commotion. The crowd is loud as guys and girls alike come to welcome him back.

He left last year for college along with a few others. Most of you were stuck there. Going to community college or working full-time jobs.

You had hooked up with Billy one time before he left for California. The backseat of his Camaro. You hadn't gone all the way but the things you had done were stuck in your brain since last summer. It was a night you thought about often.

He turns your way and your eyes meet his. You instantly feel your face flush and try to conceal it behind the red plastic cup, taking a large gulp.

A white t-shirt fits firmly against his body, a black leather jacket thrown on top. His sandy curls look a little more taken care of, a little smoother, one curl spiraled to perfection on his forehead.

He winks and smiles that charming smile as he squeezes through the crowd, heading your way.

Fuck me.

“There you are.” he huffs as he comes to a stop in front of you. His cologne fills your nose, the aroma immediately sending you back in time, the memory of last year clear as day.

His soft lips on yours, his fingers working you to your peak so effortlessly. It was like a dream.

“That feel good, baby?” he mumbled in your ear as his thick fingers glided in and out.

“So good, Billy.” you moaned breathlessly, your head falling back against his leather seats as he leaned over you.

He chuckled deeply, his fingers working in and out slowly before he curled them slightly, pressing into your g spot, making you bite down on your lip, a small whimper escaping.

“R-right there..” you gasped, rolling your hips, grinding on his hand. No one had ever been able to get you off before and Billy knew exactly what he was doing.

“Mmm… That's it, baby,” he murmured against your lips as your eyes fell shut.

“H-holy shit..” you moaned loudly as your thighs began to tremble. His two fingers precisely stroking across your sweet spot. His thumb moving up and down your soaked slit, brushing against your clit over and over.

You had completely lost yourself in the moment, the pleasure something you had never experienced by the hand of another.

“I can't wait to hear you cum.” he burned, his words bringing you closer and closer until you finally fell apart, your cries filling the small space in the car, Billy encouraging you to scream his name. And you did. Again and again…

Billy’s smooth voice saying your name brings you back to reality and your face reddens again. You still haven't had an orgasm like that since.

“Something on your mind?” he teases, reaching down and snagging a beer for himself.

You quickly shake your head and give him a soft smile. “Just thinking about last summer… How is school? California looks like it's treating you well.” you state sweetly, stepping slightly closer to him.

You take in every detail of his pretty face. His sun-kissed skin dusted with freckles, his long dark lashes such a contrast to his light curls, his lips plump and soft, his mustache trimmed neatly.

Now that he was here, no one else at this party could catch your eye. He was so alluring. So addictive.

Billy smiles as he pats his pockets for his smokes, pulling one out and offering it your way. You take it and place it between your lips, Billy reaches out lighting the cigarette for you before taking the flame to his own.

He inhales deeply, slowly releasing the smoke before he speaks.

“It’s been good. You know, same old shit.” he shrugs casually, his eyes stuck on you. You watch as his gaze travels from your face all the way down your body and back up, his lips curling into a smile.

You shift your feet, your Converse kicking the dirt as you feel his eyes on you. You were happy you had forced yourself into a dress tonight instead of your usual t-shirt and shorts. It was a deep red, riding high on your thighs, sculpting your body in all the right places.

“You look good, sweetheart.” he compliments, his tone warm and sugary. Another little wink in your direction making your heart speed up in your chest.

“So do you. You look really good. I like this shirt.” you gush, your hand reaching out to touch his chest. You can feel the firmness of his muscles underneath the skin-tight shirt. His body tenses under your touch as your hand slowly trails across his stomach.

“It looks better off,” he suggests playfully, his blue eyes glinting under the moonlight.

“Do you wanna swim?” you blurt out quickly, making him laugh.

“I didn’t bring a swimsuit.” he teases, his hand reaching out to tuck a strand of loose hair behind your ear.

“Me neither.” Your voice comes out hoarse as he looms over you.

His fingertips ghost across your thigh as you look up at him.

“Anything under this?” he whispers, his voice deep and low as he lightly tugs on the hem of your dress.

You nod, your entire body tingling from the sensation of his fingers against your skin.

“Let’s go.”

********

“You want me to swim in my underwear?” you stare at him as he begins to unbuckle his belt.

“Mhmm..” he hums lightly, shuffling out of his jeans. His jacket was next, then his shirt. Leaving him standing there in his boxer briefs, his perfect body on full display.

You cross your arms surveying the area, Only a few people were in the pool, most of the party was inside dancing or getting drunk. Billy raises an eyebrow in your direction and you bite down on your lip.

“It’s not like I haven’t seen it before.” he presses, walking closer. His hand rests on your waist, pulling you close, his body is warm against yours as his lips meet your ear.

“You weren’t shy when you were screaming my name, baby.” His breath tickles your ear, his words making you throb. His hand reaches around your back, taking your zipper in his fingers, slowly drawing it down.

“Or when you sucked my dick and swallowed every bit of my cum..” he continues, the zipper coming to a stop just above your ass. “Remember that night?” He rasps as his hand moves to your shoulder, gently pulling the strap of your dress down your arm.

“I think about it all the time.” you admit quietly as he works the other strap.

“I know you do.” he boasts, a smile playing on his lips as he pulls your dress to the concrete.

Billy’s POV

I was hoping she’d be here. Cute little thing. Sweet fucking pussy. I remember sucking her off of my fingers. And those lips.. fuck they felt good wrapped around my cock.

I can tell when I make a girl cum for the first time. It’s so gratifying. Hearing their cries, their moans, their surprise as they realize how good sex can be. There are way too many women who haven’t been pleased right. I bet she hasn’t gotten off like that since I left. But tonight, I’m gonna fuck her. Give her everything Billy Hargrove has to offer. I can’t wait to blow her fucking mind.

I watch as she kicks her dress to the side and slips out of her shoes. There are a few people on the other end of the pool, a couple making out, a few guys roughhousing.

Doesn’t matter. I’m about to make her squeal. Audience or no audience.

I reach out for her hand and her slender fingers intertwine with mine as we make our way toward the pool steps. I step down into the water, it’s a little chillier than I expected but it feels nice as we step deeper into the pool. I turn to see her with little goosebumps spread across her arms. Her nipples hard against the thin fabric of her lace bra.

She’s a fucking sight. Her perfect ass on display, her tiny panties barely hiding anything. The moonlight casts a glow across her body as you drink her in.

I’m excited to hear her cry my name again. The way she screamed just from my fingers.. Fuck, this is gonna be fun.

Her eyes shine bright as she peeks over at me. A slight smile on her face. A dark red lipstick painted on her soft lips.

Her little shy act is cute too. But she won’t be able to maintain it for long. Soon she’ll be begging me to do filthy things to her. And I’ll happily comply.

I normally would have gone for someone new but there was something about her that made me crave more. I've thought about her many times since I left. I'm not in love but the girl is something and I'm eager to have more.

I can tell she's thinking the same as she wades into the water, beckoning for me to come closer. She swims to the corner of the pool and I dive in, following behind her. I come out of the water, face to face with her. Her mascara runs slightly, leaving little black smudges under her eyes.

I love that shit. Though it’s normally caused by them gagging.

I press up against her lightly and take note of her body’s reaction to me. Her gaze falls from my eyes to my lips and back up again. Her chest moves up and down rapidly. A small bite of her lip, her body leaning into me.

Mmm.. I know, baby.

I reach out, firmly gripping her waist as she instantly presses her lips to mine, her arms coming around my neck. The noise of everyone around us seems to disappear as she slips her tongue in my mouth. Her fingers thread into my hair as my eyes shut and I take over, kissing her fiercely, pressing her body against the pool wall.

She moans into my mouth making my cock twitch. I dig my fingers into her hips pulling another moan from her, making me smirk against her lips before pulling away breathless.

“You taste just like I remember.” I groan, reaching around cupping her ass in my hands causing her to gasp. “How about that pussy, baby? Can I get another taste?” I mumble against her neck as I begin planting slow kisses up and down her exposed skin.

“Yes.. fuck.. where should we go?”

I let out a deep laugh before gradually gliding my fingers down her side. My hand skates across her thigh and slips in between her legs.

“Billy, there’s people..”

“Then I guess you'll have to be quiet.” I taunt, my voice low in her ear.

“Shit.” she breathes out as my fingers run across her clothed pussy under the water. I move the delicate fabric to the side, one finger slipping into her slit. Even under the water I can feel her need for me, her warmth wrapping around my finger, slickness coating it as I press deeper inside, a little moan falls from her mouth as it drops open.

I work in another finger, plunging into her pussy as her head falls to my shoulder trying to conceal her noises. “I missed these fingers,” she mumbles into the crook of my neck, sending a smile across my face.

I work her with my hand, adding a third finger, keeping them buried deep.

“Fuck!” she cries, her squeal barely muffled as I continue to fuck her with my hand.

Her moans grow louder as she buries her face even deeper. I can feel her pussy pulsing around my fingers as I curl and stroke across her g spot making her legs shake.

I hear voices from the other end of the pool, reminding me that we’re not alone. I lift her with one arm, her legs wrapping around my waist as her nails dig into my shoulder blades.

“Mmm.. I’m gonna.. Billy.. I’m gonna..” she stammers, her voice is shaky as I feel her clench around me.

“Cum for me, baby. Then I’m gonna take you inside where you can really scream.”

My words send her overboard and her teeth sink into my neck making me moan as she comes undone, her walls fluttering around my thick fingers. My jaw clenches as I feel the pain from her bite, followed by her lips sucking harshly as she rides out her orgasm.

Reader’s POV

“Oh my fucking god.” you laugh breathlessly as your body comes down from your high. You bring your face around and slam your lips to his, feeling elated.

He plants a few hard kisses on your lips before lifting you out of the pool. You stand up as he hops out, your eyes glancing towards the opposite side of the pool. You see the same couple still making out, people swimming around none the wiser. Holy shit.

As Billy stands, your eyes roam down his body, his erection clear through his wet briefs. Fucking hell.

“Bedroom?” you suggest coyly.

“Bedroom, baby.” he chuckles, swiping up your clothes and pulling you along.

******

“Is this Harrington’s room?” Billy questions as you lock the door behind you.

“Mhmm.. You okay with that?” you ask, walking further into the room. Billy laughs loudly at your question.

“Just makes it even better.” he snickers before tossing you to the bed.

Fuck, I'm excited. No stopping this time. I'm getting all of him.

You unclasp your wet bra, tossing it aside, watching as Billy’s eyes fall to your chest. He grins as he slides his underwear down, his cock finally unrestrained. You swiftly slip your panties off and giggle as Billy basically tackles you into the mattress.

“You're so fucking beautiful.” he compliments, as you feel his weight on top of you.

“So are you,” you reply, your voice hushed. You bring your arms around his neck and draw his lips to yours, his tongue parting your lips gently. You can feel him against your warmth as you wrap your legs around his waist.

You lift your hips, grinding against him, feeling his cock rock hard.

“I want you.” you plead desperately.

“How do you like it, baby? Soft and slow? Rough and fast? Tell me what you want.” Billy says as his hands begin to explore your body.

“Mmm.. Either.. Both.. I just want you.” you breathe out.

“My kinda girl,” Billy smirks before you feel him at your entrance. He gradually presses the first few inches into you, the stretch so delicious, so fucking good.

“Fuck, you're big.” you whimper slightly and he kisses your lips once more.

“I'm barely in, sweetheart.” he brags, a hint of cockiness laced in his tone. He pushes in deeper, making your mouth drop open with a squeak.

Once fully inside he begins to thrust. In and out, slow and steady. Your body feels overwhelmed from this new sensation. You've never had someone so deep inside of you before.

He starts to get into a nice rhythm, rolling his hips, driving into you at a perfect pace. Your eyelids flutter as he glides in and out of your pussy, your slickness coating his cock entirely.

“Fuck, baby.” Billy grunts as you start to rock with him, your bodies working perfectly together. He times his time, pumping into you with long hard strokes as he kisses you deeply.

You cross your ankles behind his back, pulling him back into you over and over again, moans and praises pouring from your lips as you give into him completely.

“Harder!” you cry unexpectedly, your body aching for something it's never known. I want him to destroy me and I know he can.

Billy grins wickedly, picking up speed, slamming into you, knocking the breath from your lungs.

“Yes!” you wail, clinging to him wildly, your nails dragging down his back as he thrusts mercilessly.

You lose yourself in the pleasure, as he pounds you into the mattress, your boobs bouncing with every thrust. You feel his hand on your ankle as he easily tosses it over his shoulder, leaning over you, making your legs tremble instantly.

“Oh- oh my god!” you scream as his cock slams directly into your g spot.

“There she is.” Billy growls, his smile widening as he slaps your thigh roughly making you squeal in delight.

“You like that?”

“Yes!”

“You like it rough?”

“Yes, Billy!”

“Tell me.”

“I want it rough. Fuck me hard, please!”

With no warning, he flips you to your stomach, pulling your ass up in the air and enters you again. His hand grips your hair and gives it a yank, a drawn out moan leaving your lips.

He slams into you, your ass bouncing against him over and over as he wears you out. His firm hand leaving handprints all across your ass. Your hands grip the sheets tightly as your body gives into the euphoria. The perfect amount of pleasure and pain blended together.

You had reached your high twice, the second even stronger than the first. Your body sensitivity at an all time high.

“Cum for me, again.” Billy mumbles lustfully, his hands gripping your waist, fingers digging into your skin.

“Yes, Billy.” you whimper. Your entire body felt like jello but you didn't care. You wanted this, needed this.

You soaked his cock once more before he filled you with his cum, both of you collapsing to the bed, out of breath.

“Why the fuck did you have to move again?” you pant, your cheeks flushed, your heart pounding.

Billy chuckles as he reaches over for a cigarette, pulling one out for you both.

“Any time I visit.. This is happening, doll.” he motions between the two of you.

“Visit more than once a year?” you pout, laying your head on his sweaty chest.

“Mhmm.. I didn't think I’d miss anything about Hawkins, baby. But damn I'm gonna miss you.”

#billy hargrove x reader #billy hargrove smut #billy hargrove x fem!reader smut #billy hargrove oneshot #billy hargrove

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more-mara · 5 days ago

Note

Hi I don't know if you take requests but I'm genuinely so thirsty for a c²/oscar fic doesn't matter if it's nsfw I really just need one 😭😭😭🙏

I’ve actually written a Charles/Carlos/Oscar threesome already which you can find on my AO3 which is linked on my profile (shameless self promo) I’m just too lazy to link it here lmao.

But here’s a small thing set after the Jeddah gp.

“You really can’t help yourself, can you?”

Charles had the audacity to look scandalised as he pulled away from Oscar, his gaze zeroing in on Carlos who was standing smugly behind them.

“He wants it,” Charles said with a scoff as he pulled Oscar closer by his waist, the younger man being manhandled easily as he managed to catch his own hands into the front of Charles’ shirt.

“I’m sure he does,” Carlos muttered which had Oscar turning briefly to offer him his best scowl before turning back to Charles with a soppy look of need.

“I’ll give you whatever you want, mon chéri,” Charles said, a smirk flashing across his face as he let his hands drift down to grope at Oscar’s ass.

Oscar gasped quietly, burying his head in Charles’ neck- suckling at the skin there to keep himself occupied.

“It’s a little pathetic,” Carlos spoke, stepping a little closer. Oscar just whined this time- no look of distain or disapproval on his face.

“That he won the race and yet here he is begging to be used,” Carlos continued, taking a further step forward. Oscar whimpered again, hands clutching even tighter in the front of Charles’ red Ferrari polo.

Sometimes, Carlos couldn’t even look at Charles in his team kit without feeling a sudden surge of…something. It wasn’t exactly jealousy, just sadness maybe- thinking about what could’ve been. How four years of being teammates with a man he’d spent so much intimate time with was ending so suddenly.

“I must thank your trainer for this,” Carlos said before crowding up behind Oscar and grabbing a fistful of his ass. Oscar lunched forward into Charles, gasping loudly.

“Come on,” Oscar whined, his body shaking as he tilted his head up to look at Charles- eyes wide and pleading.

“This what you want?” Charles asked as he slipped his hand underneath Oscar’s clothes, his finger dipped between Oscar’s cheeks. Oscar nodded violently- cheeks flushed and cock straining in his underwear.

Carlos pushed himself a little closer, trying to block them off a little more from the outside world.

Because that was the thing- they were still in the paddock, hidden between two large buildings. They were lucky that it was night time.

“Why are you wet?” Charles asked, pushing his finger into Oscar. He knew the answer, he just wanted to hear Oscar say it.

Oscar bit his bottom lip, cheeks still flushed a beautiful shade of pink as he blinked up at Charles.

“Fingered myself after the podium,” He whispered as Carlos leaned in towards his neck, licking a strip up behind his ear.

“Good boy,” Carlos said, his hands planting onto Oscar’s hips as Charles continued to work his finger inside Oscar’s hole.

Oscar let out a breathless moan, leaning back into Carlos’ chest. Charles protested this as he slipped another finger inside.

“When you two are done defacing my teammate, I need him for a debrief,”

Oscar’s eyes widened in disbelief at the voice- hiding his face in Charles’ chest. Carlos and Charles both looked stunned, bodies frozen in place.

“Lando- we-“

“Don’t bother, I have eyes, mate. I can see what you’re up to. Just get Oscar to me ASAP, yeah?” Lando said and before anyone could explain themselves any further, he was gone.

“I gotta-“

“Hold on cariño, you’re not going anywhere until we’re done with you,” Carlos said, hands starting to pull Oscar’s pants and underwear down.

“But Lando said-“

“Does Lando decide what you can and can’t do?” Charles asked, fingers still buried inside Oscar- he shifted them slightly to make a point, Oscar’s face scrunching up at the stimulation.

“No…”

“Then be a good boy and bend over,”

#oscar piastri #carlos sainz #charles leclerc #carcar #charlos #charloscar #choscar #maras fics #maras asks

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queen-of-the-avengers · 2 years ago

Text

Office Romance

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x Female!Reader

Word Count: ~1.2k

Warnings: making out in elevators

Summary: How do you expect to get any work done if your boss is none other than Natasha Romanoff? Does she feel the same about you?

Squares Filled: secret romance (2021) for @avengersbingo

Author’s Note: any and all comments are appreciated <3

It’s hard to concentrate on the words you’re trying to type when the most beautiful woman is sitting in the office next to you. Your eyes keep drifting over your computer to look at her through the small glass window next to her door. She is causally chewing on a piece of gum and popping it every so often. Her pretty red lips form a perfect O when she blows the piece of gum.

What you wouldn’t give to be on the receiving end of that mouth.

“Bitch, are you listening?”

Your coworker, Wanda, throws a wadded piece of paper at your head. You snap out of your trance and look into her knowing eyes. She has a smirk on her face that doesn’t leave even as she goes back to her job.

“What?”

“I need those files over ASAP. I can’t do my job if you don’t do yours.”

“Right,” you mumble and focus on your computer instead.

“Thank you,” she says once you send her the files she needs, “now you can get back to daydreaming about the boss.”

“Shut up.” Your phone rings and you start to sweat when you see your boss is trying to conference you into her call. You smooth back your hair as if you’re going to see her and pick up the phone. “Yes, ma’am?”

“I need you to come into my office.”

“Of course.” you hang up. “She wants me in her office. How do I look?”

“Pull your shirt down a bit. Make the girlies pop.” You do as she says. “Now button your shirt up because you look ridiculous.”

“Fuck you.”

You get up without adjusting your shirt and walk the twenty feet over to Natasha’s office. You knock once even though she asked you to come in and open the door.

“You called?”

Your eyes can’t help but drift lower to her breasts. Everything she wears makes them look bigger than they are, so they are spilling over the top in a classy way. She is wearing a black pencil skirt with a white button-up that has the first three buttons undone because her shirt wouldn’t close otherwise. You quickly look up in hopes she didn’t see you checking her out.

“I need you to get these files sent over to purchasing right away.” You grab the files and are about to make your exit when she stops you. “Wait, I forgot one.”

You turn to see her walk over to her file cabinet and open the bottom drawer. She bends down with her ass sticking out towards you. Of course, you’re going to look. It’s like she wants you to look at how perfect her ass is. You bite your lower lip to stop the sinful thoughts from coming out. When she stands and turns, you snap back into reality and look as if you weren't checking her out.

“Thank you,” you say and grab the other file.

“No, thank you,” she smiles flirtatiously.

You quickly head back to your desk not missing the sly smirk Wanda gives you. It’s very hard to get your job done when your boss has an office right next to your desk, but it’s even harder when she makes a show of eating her lunch as if she wants you to look at her. There are times when you think she might be into you, but then you think that she’s your boss and that would be inappropriate.

The only work you get done is sending the files over to purchasing while the rest of your time is spent fantasizing about what you’d do if you got her into your bed. The end of the day comes quicker without you staring at the clock every hour. It’s time to go home and have a really long and cold shower.

“I’ll meet you down at the car, okay?” Wanda says as she packs her things up.

“Yeah, I’ll be right there.”

You and Wanda live together and often ride in the same car. The only way you won’t is if one of you needs to leave early or do something after work. Natasha gets done with her work at the same time as you, so you two meet just as you’re leaving your cubicle and she is leaving her office.

“You know, I’m really proud of you and the work you’ve been doing.” You and Natasha walk to the elevators together. “Keep it up and I’ll put in a good work to the board about a raise.”

“Thank you, ma’am,” you grin.

“Please, call me Natasha or Nat. Whatever you prefer. Ma’am makes me feel so old,” she chuckles and walks onto the elevator with you.

“Okay, Nat.”

You and Natasha are standing so close together in the already small elevator, that you can practically feel the heat radiating off her skin. The air is thick with tension, the kind of tension only touching might relieve. All you want to do is kiss her. Does she feel it? If she does, does she feel the same? You look at the digital number at the top of the elevator that tells you what floor you’re on, and it’s counting down very slowly. Has it always been this slow? You sneak a peek at Natasha to see her already looking at you. You quickly look away in hopes she didn’t see you checking her out, but the damage has been done.

Fuck it, Natasha thinks. She drops her bag onto the ground and grabs both sides of your face. She pulls you into her and kisses you like she was always meant to be there. You drop your bag in shock but you kiss her back like you’ve always wanted to. You’ve imagined this scenario ten different ways and all of them involved with you taking her back to your place regardless if Wanda is there or not.

You back up into the wall with her lips still attached to yours, and she slides her hands into your hair to get a better grip on you. The universe has it so that as soon as Natasha gets her lips on you, the digital number picks up speed because before you know it, you’re at the ground level. Natasha pulls away from you and grabs her bag as if nothing happened.

She looks perfect as always while your hair is a bit disheveled, your clothes are a bit wrinkled, and you’re pretty sure your lips are swollen.

“Tomorrow, come in a little earlier. I need to have a meeting with you.”

The elevator doors open and Natasha is the first one to step off.

“Yes, ma’am,” you whisper.

Wanda is waiting there with an impatient look on her face but once she sees you and Natasha, that disappears. Your boss doesn’t give Wanda a lick of attention as she walks by, and Wanda smiles widely when she sees the look on your face. She reaches into her purse to grab her small compact, opens it, and shoves it in your face. Natasha’s red lipstick is all over your mouth. It’s clear what you two were doing in there.

“Shit,” you gasp and fix as much of yourself as possible.

“If you’re gonna fuck her, at least give me some of the perks.”

“Shut up,” you chuckle, unable to stop the blush from spreading up your cheeks.

Follow my library blog @aqueenslibrary where I reblog all my stories, so you can put notifications on there without the extra stuff :)

#natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff fic #natasha romanoff fanfiction #natasha romanoff fanfic #natasha romanoff fluff #natasha romanoff smut #natasha romanoff fiction #natasha romanoff fan fiction #natasha romanoff fan fic #marvel #marvel fic #marvel fanfiction #marvel fiction #marvel fan fiction #marvel fanfic #marvel fan fic #marvel fluff #marvel smut

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naughtyneganjdm · 21 days ago

Text

Christmas in Jackson - Chapter 13

Summary: Against better judgement, Joel goes to the party that Maria and Tommy have with Y/N. Things seem fine at first until someone in town decides to start trouble for Joel when they alert Y/N to Joel's dark past.

Characters: Joel Miller, the reader (OC), Tommy, Maria, Ellie, Dina, etc.

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/61159651/chapters/165787558

Warnings: Swearing, Fluff, Sad Moments, Tiny Amounts of Smut (Not very detailed), Graphic Depictions of Violence, Joel being very depressed, blood, etc.

Notes: I have this whole story done now! I know it's in the middle of April lol, but what can you do when life doesn't let you relax for more than ten minutes. So I will have this up ASAP. There are two chapters left after this one. Just a reminder that this is an alternate universe, so Joel's origin story is close to the same, but a little different since there was never an outbreak. Thanks to anyone that still reads this! If you'd like to read previous chapters, check them out here.

“You know, I thought the whole point of a shower was for us to get clean,” Y/N panted with Joel peppering kisses over her shoulder from where they were standing in front of the bathroom mirror. Snickering against her skin sent chills down her spine. The warmth of his breath lingered over her neck, with his short facial hair scratching at her flesh. Gradually, Joel’s eyes lifted to meet her stare in the slightly fogged over mirror from the hot shower they had taken together that likely lasted longer than it should have. Dragging his hands up over her sides caused her eyes to flutter to a slow close. A broken breath mirroring that of a whimper escaped her throat. Caressing his hands lower led to her hips where he gave a soft squeeze. Unhurriedly, his hands continued their journey downwards until he was able to palm in over her thighs. Pampering her shoulder with slow kisses had her leaning back further into him. “We were supposed to take a shower so we could be ready for the dinner, but now? Well, now we’re messy all over again.”

“Only on the inside,” he growled, nipping faintly at her neck causing the tiniest of moans to fall from her lips. Sliding his right hand up, he caressed in over her abdomen before lowering downwards to palm between her thighs. Almost immediately, a tremoring exhale filled the air as he buried his nose in against the side of her neck. “There really isn’t anything wrong with being dirty. Dirty is nice.”

So easily Joel could have her reacting to him and he knew it. It never really took much. With his free hand, he raised it up to drag it across the length of her breasts. Stopping at one of them, he gave it a firm squeeze provoking her to coo out, “You’re not playing fair with me Joel Miller.”

“Maybe not,” he snickered against her jawline as his kisses continued up over the side of her neck. “But this is more fun than anything we have planned today. And I like this kind of playing. I like watching you squirm. It makes me very happy.”

“And that kind of happy leads to things we don’t have time for,” she purred out, her fingers curling around his wrist to try to stop him from distracting her from what she knew they had to do. “I really don’t think it would be okay with me going to your brother’s dinner with your come dripping down my thighs.”

“I mean, I don’t see a problem with it,” Joel snickered, tipping forward just enough to look down toward her thighs. “It’s just marking you as mine.”

“I’m yours regardless,” she turned just enough to meet Joel in a lingering kiss that had him humming against the warmth of her lips.

“I’ll clean you up,” he assured her, brushing his tongue out against hers as he gave one final squeeze at her breast. Everything took her breath away when it came to him and he knew that. With one simple touch he had her melting in the palm of his hand. Forcing her to turn toward him, he picked her up in his arms and set her down on the edge of the counter. Almost instinctively her arms hooked loosely around his shoulders causing a bright smile to tug at his handsome features. Brushing her fingers through his damp hair, she swept it back out of his eyes and sighed. “You look happy.”

“I am happy,” she countered, leaning in to pepper kisses against his lips. Curling his fingers around the back of her neck, Joel pulled her in closer to him to deepen their kisses. What was first playful and sweet grew passionate and hungry. With a smile, she pulled back just enough to rest her forehead in against his. “Although, I think I’m going to be a little sore and tired.”

“But pleased?” he snickered, extending his right hand out to steal a tissue from the counter. Looking down between them, he dragged it along her inner thigh pulling out the tiniest of moans from her as he cleaned his release from her body. Lifting his stare, his eyebrows bounced up at her reaction to him doing what he was. Biting down on his bottom lip, he continued to clean her up with a smile. “Y’know, I’d really rather stay here tonight.”

“I think we both would,” she pointed out with Joel throwing the tissue away in the trashcan beside the counter. When he returned, Joel’s hand found its way back between her thighs. Dropping her head forward against his shoulder, she bit down on her bottom lip when he pressed a finger inside of her. Inserting a second, he wasn’t rushed in the way he pumped his fingers into her body while nuzzling his nose in against the side of her face.

“Then why bother going tonight?” Joel slurred, pulling his fingers from her body seeing that some of his release was coating his fingertips. Tipping his head back, he lifted his fingers and took his time to drag his fingertips across her bottom lip. “Let’s just focus on us again tonight. Find new ways to enjoy one another.”

A raspy moan rumbled deep from within his throat with her tongue dragging out across his fingertips. By the time her lips wrapped around them, it had his heart kick starting inside of his chest, “Fucking hell…”

A wet sound surrounded them when her mouth pulled from his fingers. Growling out, Joel could sense the liquid rush that flooded through his veins after she cleaned his fingertips of his release, “I think we’ve discovered many, many ways to enjoy one another. I’ve had sex more in the last few days than I probably have in years. My body is feeling it.”

“Then how about we cuddle up by the fire? I’ll grab the blankets again, we can turn a movie on. Watch something?” Joel rambled on, his thumb caressing over the curve of her jawline with his dark eyes narrowing. “And if we have sex, I promise I’ll be very romantic. Gentle, slow. Drag it out.”

“You really don’t want to go tonight, do you?” she wondered, brushing her fingers through his naturally curly hair. His cheesy smile faded to a frown with him sighing loudly. “We already told Tommy that we would be coming over tonight honey.”

“I know that, but you have to understand…” Joel started, stopping when he genuinely wanted to be honest with her, but he didn’t know what to say. “Y/N I don’t like being out in public. And Maria’s family? They don’t like me much. They don’t hide it neither. I always leave this dinner feelin’ really shitty about myself.”

“Then why did you agree to go to it in the first place? People shouldn’t be allowed to make you feel like that,” she declared as his hands settled in against her hips. “I know it sounded like Tommy wanted us there to be his moral support because Maria’s family is driving him crazy with the whole baby stuff.”

“I wanna be there for my brother, I do,” he sighed, nuzzling his nose in against hers in attempts to try to calm himself. “I just feel like my way of helping my brother is gonna be me being the primary target of these people. They know about my past and somehow, it’s always brought up. Snide comments here and there.”

“I’m not going to force you to go to something you don’t want to go to,” she whispered, palming in over the side of his face realizing that he actually did seem pretty upset about things. “I can meet Ellie some other time. Hell, I’m good with hot chocolate, some popcorn and cheesy action movies until the end of time if that’s what you want.”

“I knew there was a reason I loved you,” he rumbled, releasing a long exhale when both Ellie and Tommy came to mind. “I do have to go, don’t I?”

“That’s not my decision to make,” she reminded him, sweeping his hair out of his eyes and behind his ear. “If you go? This time you have something you didn’t before. And that’s me. I don’t care about your past. I don’t care what they say. I will always defend you. I promise. I’m not afraid to put someone in their place.”

“I’m very much aware of that,” he snickered, biting down on his bottom lip and leaning back enough to look her over. “I guess we can test the water and see how it goes. I reckon if things get too overwhelming for me, Tommy would understand if I had to leave early.”

“I support anything you want to do,” she whispered, pressing another tender kiss over his lips. “Although, I do think I need to hop in the shower and clean off first if that’s what we’re planning on doing.”

“Now why would you do that?” he hushed her, his southern drawl growing thicker as he shook his head. Sweeping his rough fingertips in over her inner thigh, he smirked and shrugged his shoulders. “I kinda like the idea of you being at that party with my cum inside of you.”

“You’re fucking naughty,” she laughed noticing the way his eyes dilated with lust for her. “I’m serious Joel Miller, I think you have some serious kinks going on in that brain of yours.”

“Oh come on,” he growled, nipping at her chin before tipping back to stare out at her with his chocolate-colored eyes. “You like it just as much as I do. You like the feeling of being mine. Plus, you were the one begging me to come inside of you. As you do most times we are together. So, I reckon, you’re just as naughty.”

Clearing her throat, her eyes came to a tight close with Joel pressing delicate kisses over her jawline and toward her neck, “Nothing turns me on more than when you’re beggin’ me to come inside of you. Clawin’ at my back, cryin’ out my name.”

Somehow, his voice grew raspier and his accent was that much more intense, “The sounds you make when I come inside of you are like fucking heaven. I tell you that. You cling so tightly to me, like you don’t want to let me go. So if I’m a freak? You’re my equal honey.”

“Fair enough,” she panted, whimpering out at the ache that was starting to grow inside of her again. An amused rumble escaped Joel noticing the way she was breathing. Just talking to her like that had her nipples hard and it made him suck in a sharp breath of air.

Raising his hand up, he circled his thumb over the hard bud and felt a lump growing in his throat while she braced herself on the counter before him, “How late are we?”

“I imagine we’re going to be pretty late,” she commented with Joel pulling her right to the edge of the counter. Gasping out, she clung tightly to him as he buried his nose in against the side of her neck when he thrust himself deeply inside of her again. “Joel…”

“A few more minutes couldn’t hurt,” he slurred against the side of her neck leaving hot, wet kisses there. Her arms wrapped tightly around his shoulders with his arm hooking firmly around her waist. Flexing his bicep drew her closer to him. With slow, determined movements Joel swallowed down hard recognizing his timing was probably extremely bad. “I have a question.”

“Yeah?” she panted, leaving kisses along his jawline eliciting him to moan at the sensation. Unhurriedly her lips trailed in over his and he growled when she left wet kisses over his bottom lip. “Daddy?”

“I uh…well…” he paused his movements, clearing his throat when he tipped his head from side to side. Maybe this wasn’t the best topic to approach so early in their relationship, but his conversation with Tommy yesterday was still lingering in his mind. “I was wondering, what do you think about kids?”

“Kids?” she repeated, sucking in a sharp breath of air with his hips rolling up against hers in slow, powerful movements. Really? It was hard to focus. Even if they were unrushed movements, her body was already incredibly sensitive. “I guess it depends on the kid. Usually they are pretty cute. Depending on their ages, they can be really fun to hang around with. Of course there are some that are…”

“No, no,” he interrupted her with a laugh, shaking his head when what he was trying to ask went right over her head in that moment. Her face scrunched up in confusion. Trying to gather his courage, he shifted before her and sighed. Stopping his movements, his dark eyes locked with hers and he felt his heart hammering inside of his chest. “I mean…would you ever consider the idea of having children with me?”

Almost immediately, a sense of shock flooded into her face with her eyebrows bouncing up. Shit, that’s when he started to panic. Shaking his head, he forced himself to look away from her and felt his heart skip a beat, “Y’know what? I’m sorry, forget it. That was so stupid. I don’t know why I even…”

“Joel,” she reached up to place her hand in over the side of his face to draw him back to her, trying to pull him away from his stressed nature. “That just wasn’t what I was expecting from you while we were…doing this. You’ll have to give me a second to gather myself.”

“I just don’t want to scare you away from me,” he frowned, leaning into her touch with her caressing at the side of his face. “It’s just, I was talkin’ to Tommy about something yesterday and it made me think how I’m not young anymore. And then I started thinkin’ about how I want to live life the best way I can. I love you. I’m excited at the thought of you movin’ in here and I just, I don’t know. I thought maybe it’d be nice to have children with you. Maybe it’s cus’ Maria and Tommy are havin’ a baby, I don’t know. But? Y’know what? Forget it. That’s a big question to put on someone that…”

“Honey, give me time to answer before you decide the answer is no,” she requested, cupping his face in her hands lovingly. Taking a moment to think of her answer, she shrugged her shoulders before locking her eyes with his. “I haven’t really thought about the idea of having children. I’ve always been so busy that I didn’t think I’d have time for them. But now? Considering I’m moving here and I don’t know anything about my future, yet. I could see myself having a family with you.”

“Yeah?” his eyebrows bounced up, a sense of excitement flooding through his features and his whole body language changed. “I mean, I don’t wanna force you or nothin’. I know it’s fast and…”

“What hasn’t gone fast with our relationship? People are already going to think we’re crazy as it is,” she responded, dragging her thumb out across his bottom lip. It had his eyes fluttering to a close with him pressing kisses against the pad of her thumb. “Something tells me that you’d make a really good dad.”

Pausing, Joel’s kisses came to a slow stop with them gradually opening. Swallowing down hard, his Adam’s apple bounced in his throat. At this point? He knew that she was aware that he used to be a father. It’s just she wasn’t aware that he knew Maria told her about Sarah. With a weak smile, Joel reached for her hand and pulled it up to place a loving kiss over the back of it.

“Y’know, Tommy pointed out to me yesterday that we weren’t using protection when we were sleeping together. And while I reckon it’s creepy as hell that my brother is thinkin’ about that with us,” he heard her laugh at it made him pause for a second to get a chuckle in himself. “I don’t know, I just realized he was right. And I don’t know if you’re on birth control or…”

“I am,” she claimed, her eyes narrowing out at him when he exhaled loudly. “Why? Are you asking me to stop?”

“I mean…” he stammered to find the right words but was falling short. “I wouldn’t ask you to do that so soon. I reckon you’d want to move in first and figure out what you were doing…”

His words came to a quick halt when her lips slammed in over his, interrupting his train of thought. Over and over again she kissed him with their breathing growing louder. Pulling her closer to the edge of the counter had her gasping out but clinging tighter to him. Starting to bounce his hips up toward hers had their winces filling the smaller bathroom. Her fingers sank into his hair, tugging firmly at it with his fingers digging into her flesh.

“I’d do just about anything for you Joel Miller,” she purred against his lips, breaking away from their kiss with a pant. Tracing over the side of his face, she shook her head and sighed loudly. “Anything to make you happy. And I’d be okay with it. Because you make me happy.”

Passionate sweep after sweep of his lips over hers had her crying out his name with every movement he made beneath her while she clung tightly to him, “That was the most in-depth conversation I’ve ever had during sex.”

“I highly doubt that,” he winced, nuzzling his nose in against hers. Hovering his lips just over hers had her smiling.

“Sure, there has been dirty talk,” her nails bit into his shoulders with him nibbling at her bottom lip. “But never such a serious…conversation. No one was ever asking if they could impregnate me.”

“I’m happy to be the first,” he hummed against her lips causing a chill to run down her spine. His eyes slammed shut with his continued thrusts enjoying the way she held him close while tugging at his dark hair. It didn’t take long for them to finish since everything was already so sensitive as it was with their previous sex. When they were done, he just rest his head against her shoulder loving the way it felt with her leaving kisses over his freckle covered skin. “Sometimes I wonder if I’m gonna wake up in front of the fireplace at the inn.”

“What do you mean?” she leaned back enough to look him over. By his expression, he looked embarrassed as he sighed.

“I mean I often wonder if I conjured you up in one of my dreams. The perfect person walks into our inn and all of this happens in such a short amount of time?” Joel stammered, looking for the right words to describe how he was feeling. “It doesn’t often feel real. So I’m waiting to wake up from my dream.”

“You’re very much awake,” she assured him with a weak smile, her hand reaching for his so she could hook their fingers together. Giving a firm squeeze, she brought his hand up to place a kiss over the back of it. “Sure, we’re a little crazy, but I think we’ve already learned to accept that…”

“A very long time ago,” he smirked, dropping his head forward to lean it in against hers. “I just love you. And loving things scares me.”

“That’s normal. It just means your human,” she claimed, pulling him in for a loving hug where she stroked her fingers tenderly against the back of his neck. Placing tiny kisses over his neck and toward his shoulder she knew that he yearned for this kind of touch. How touch starved Joel could be was one of the first things she noticed about him. “When you love something, it wouldn’t be normal to not feel that way.”

While Joel knew that to be true, he just wasn’t used to this kind of feeling. When they finally did start to get ready, Joel knew that he didn’t want to go to this thing. Dealing with his family? That was one thing. Dealing with the rest of the world and the people in the town? That was another. There was only so much socializing he could do and he couldn’t trust a stranger to not say something.

Sitting at the bottom of the bed after they finished up in the bathroom, Joel watched Y/N getting ready. Bracing his hands back on the bed, he tipped his head to the side and sighed loudly, “Y/N? You could really see a future with us, right? One where we’re together and you’re happy?”

“I don’t like to live in the future, I’d rather focus on the moment,” she stressed to him, turning to face him realizing that his expression showed that he was ill at ease. “But I know how I feel right now whenever I’m with you and it’s not a feeling I can ever see leaving me. You’ve made your mark on me Joel Miller. I can’t get it to leave.”

“Good,” he grumbled pushing up from the bed onto his feet. Heading over toward her, he faintly cupped her face in his hands. Sweeping his thumbs in against the side of her face, he sighed loudly. “I don’t want that to leave.”

The sound of Joel’s phone buzzing in his pocket interrupted the two of them right when he was about the kiss her and it made the both of them smile, “I’m guessing that’s Tommy having a meltdown that we aren’t there yet?”

“Most likely,” he frowned, stepping back to dig into his pocket to find his phone. Staring down at it, she was right, it was Tommy calling him. Exhaling loudly, Joel considered answering it, but ultimately swiped away the call. “We’ll get there when we get there. I reckon they have a lot of help.”

Putting his phone back, he stepped before Y/N and reached for her hands to grab a tight hold of them, “I do feel like I need to warn you today that you might hear some things and some people might be awkward with you. Maria’s dad don’t like me much, so he might throw some jabs in there. And I think my brother has Ellie convinced that I’m having a mid-life crisis with how I’m handling things with you. Other than my brother needing someone to lean on and maybe Ellie, no one really wants to see me there.”

“Then don’t bother with anyone else,” she blurt out, shaking her head as she spoke. “You don’t owe anyone anything. And I don’t care what people say about you. Nothing, and I mean nothing, is going to change my opinion of you. Do you understand me?”

“Yes ma’am,” he weakly smiled realizing that all of his fears were weighing heavy on him, but like she always did, she was very reassuring and comforting for him to help him work through it. Every year he went to this dinner previously, he just came home feeling worse about himself. But this year? At least he had her by his side. So maybe things would be different. “Where have you been my whole life?”

“Halfway across the country,” she teased him, tickling at his ribs and it had him chuckling against the side of her neck. “But I’m here now. And that’s all that matters. You’ve got me on your side. I promise you that.”

“Mhmm…I don’t doubt that either,” he hummed, holding her in close to him. Did he want to go to this thing? No. But by Tommy already calling him, he felt like he had to. “I love you.”

“And I love you,” she responded, brushing his hair behind his ear. Kissing him once more, she traced her thumb across his plump bottom lip and it made him smile. Just the sight of that could warm her heart, even in a moment like this where he was uncomfortable. Even though he was trying, it was obvious in everything that he did that he didn’t want to go. But he still followed her out of the house and stopped when he saw that the street was already lined with cars she hadn’t seen before. Considering they were later than they said they would be, it only made sense for it to be that way. The closer they got to Tommy’s the more Joel seemed to tense up. Maybe it was an involuntary reaction, but Joel seemed to drag his feet in the snow like he was regretting his decision. Pausing, she looked toward the door of Tommy’s home and then back at Joel. “You know what? Screw it. We can just go back to the house and…”

“Joel,” a voice called out after the front door was heard opening. Gazing back over her shoulder, Y/N saw a young woman moving out from inside the house. The sight of her made Joel smile brightly when he slowly released Y/N. It was the first time he seemed happy instead of miserable. “Goddamn. I know you’re old and shit, but Dina’s dead grandmother is moving faster than you. I was worried about you. Tommy was having a meltdown. You should have fucking seen him.”

“Ellie,” Joel grunted, laughing as Ellie made it down the stairs to wrap her arms firmly around Joel’s torso. With a loud exhale, Joel wrapped his arms tightly around her and pulled her close. By the expression over his face, Y/N could tell that Joel wasn’t expecting this kind of response from the young woman that he told her he took under his wing years ago. “You haven’t changed. It’s good to see you kiddo.”

“It’s good to see you too,” Ellie smiled, stepping back and lifting her hand up. Tapping faintly at the side of Joel’s face had some color flooding into it. In that moment, it was obvious that Joel’s eyes were burning over and he was doing his best to keep it together. But the moment made him emotional and it was obvious. Finally looking up at Y/N, Ellie pointed out toward Y/N and gave a weak smile. “So this is her, huh?”

“Yeah,” Joel shook off the feeling of the overwhelming emotions that he was experiencing. Motioning Y/N closer, Joel grabbed a firm hold of her hand and hooked his fingers with hers. “This is Y/N. She’s…well she’s my girlfriend.”

“I sadly know about her more than I probably should because Tommy can’t keep his mouth shut,” Ellie began, noticing the way that both Joel and Y/N seemed to get pale with that comment. “I just…I mean, I know that she’s a doctor and that she’s from New York. What did you think I was saying?”

“Nothin’,” Joel was thankful to hear that considering Tommy had a problem with keeping his mouth shut about what he had walked in on with Joel and Y/N previously. And their sex life was not something that Joel wanted Tommy talking to Ellie about. “I just, Tommy has a problem with talkin’ too much sometimes.”

“Oh no. I just mean, he told me all of the things I could have asked her to know her. But that’s okay! Because we will just have to find time to talk today to learn other things,” Ellie outstretched her hand to introduce herself to Y/N. Accepting the gesture with her free hand that wasn’t holding onto Joel’s, Y/N offered a welcoming smile. “It’s nice to meet you Y/N. You’ll have to forgive me. This man right here means a lot to me so if I interrogate you with a lot of questions, it’s for a good reason.”

“I would expect nothing less and I’m an open book,” Y/N was very accepting of what Ellie said. In fact, it made her happy to hear that Ellie felt that way. In previous discussions it felt like Joel may have thought that Ellie didn’t care about him anymore, so Ellie saying that? That quickly shut down Joel’s theory. “I know it sounds crazy, but I do love this man. Very much. So, I’m willing to go through just about anything for him.”

“Oh wow,” Ellie blurt out, looking to Joel with big eyes. It seemed like she was impressed. Yet? Surprise flooded through her young features when she released a laugh. “How did you brainwash this one Joel?”

“I’m irresistible. That’s how,” his voice changed by deepening the tone of it. Waving his hand about had both Y/N and Ellie immediately bursting out in laughter afterwards. It caused a warmth to flood into Joel’s face and he turned a light shade of red. “What? I am?”

“Of course you are honey,” Y/N agreed with him and the arrogance that Joel had feigned now had him rubbing at the back of his neck in a moment of tension. “You’re the most irresistible man I know.”

“See,” Joel defended his comment, holding his hand up toward Y/N. Giving Joel a nod, Ellie wiped at the corner of her eyes from the good laugh she got from it. Sighing loudly, Joel shrugged his shoulders and reached for Y/N again to pull her in close to him. “Truthfully? I don’t know how I got so lucky. Somehow fate led her to the inn and I’ve never been more thankful.”

“Well just a pre-warning Y/N, you’re the topic of discussion for most people here today. A lot of them want to meet you because a lot of people didn’t think Joel would ever get with someone. So they are very curious about you and who you are,” Ellie claimed, giving her attention fully to Y/N. Circling her finger in the air, Ellie tipped her head from side to side. “But? Dina and I saved a place at the table for you two to be with us. That way I’ve got you in case people overstep their boundaries.”

“Overstep their…” Y/N was about to question that, but then remembered where she was. Most of the people here consistently did that. “Right.”

“Damn big brother, could you take any longer?” Tommy’s voice grumbled from the front door of the house. Pretty quickly Tommy was approaching them, moving down the steps in a hurry. “I thought you were abandoning me here all alone today.”

“You weren’t alone. You had Ellie,” Joel insisted, pointing over toward Ellie while his fingers squeezed firmly around Y/N’s. What he needed was that support to know that she was there. He was uneasy and she knew it. But he was doing his best to hold it together. Following Ellie into the home with Tommy made Y/N realize Ellie was being serious. Everyone that saw her stopped to talk to her. And it felt like she was meeting someone new every few minutes. But thankfully, so far, it seemed like everyone was nice. No one said anything inappropriate or rude. They were just introducing themselves and being friendly. Talking to her about her life in New York and her career. Some people would talk to her about their favorite places they visited in New York, happy to associate her with something that they knew. Even though people were talking to her, Joel was never more than a foot or two away from her. While she was talking to strangers, Joel was still very focused on talking to Ellie and who Y/N assumed was Ellie’s significant other. “Hey Y/N…”

Hearing Joel’s deep rumble of a voice, she turned around to see that Joel was holding a baby in his arms and he looked thrilled to be doing so. Cuddling the little boy closer to his chest, Joel gave her a cheesy smile and nodded down, “There is someone I want you to meet.”

“Oh hell. Who is this,” Y/N turned toward Joel, feeling a sense of awe at the little boy in his arms. His big brown eyes were staring up at her, a tiny smile tugging at his features. Enthusiastically she continued to talk to the baby who liked the way she was giving him attention. “You are gorgeous aren’t you? Wearing that suit makes you look so handsome.”

“Oh he is going to eat that up,” Ellie chuckled hearing the giggles of JJ follow with his smile spreading out across his chubby cheeks.

“This here is JJ,” Joel introduced her, slightly bouncing on his feet with his head tipped down toward the little boy. Ellie was smiling at the way that Joel was interacting with the baby and it was very noticeable from where Y/N was. “This is Dina and Ellie’s son. And that right there is Dina. She’s Ellie’s partner…”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you,” Y/N lifted up long enough to introduce herself to Dina who seemed very shy in comparison to Ellie. By the sounds that JJ made it was obvious that he wanted Y/N’s attention again causing her to smile. “Well you are the cutest thing I’ve seen in a long time.”

“Hey,” Joel feigned being offended with a laugh surprising Ellie with the way that Joel genuinely seemed happy. Even the way he was being so affectionate toward JJ impressed her. “I thought I was the cutest thing.”

“Well, second best to this little guy,” Y/N winked with JJ reaching his hand out to try to curl his tiny fingers around Joel’s thick finger. Right on time JJ giggled and it made both of them laugh.

“You’re stealin’ my woman little man,” Joel grumbled under his breath wiggling his finger about having JJ giggle again. What was surprising is that Ellie saw something in Joel she hadn’t seen in a very long time. A light that brought forth a happiness inside of him. What she expected to have to do today was lecture Joel about finding some random woman, but instead she could see that this actually seemed to have a positive effect on Joel. “You gotta stop being so damn charming.”

“Holy shit, are you seeing this?” Ellie muttered under her breath, pulling Dina in closer to her who was watching her son with both Joel and the new woman in his life. Giving a single nod, Dina couldn’t help but smile at how much JJ seemed to be enjoying the attention from both of them. “I think he likes you Y/N.”

“Well I like him too. He has the cutest little cheeks and laugh,” she expressed to Ellie, finally standing up straight and moving forward enough to extend her hand out to introduce herself to Dina. “It’s really nice to meet you. JJ here is a handsome little guy in the suit you put him in.”

“Oh, he eats it up,” Dina waved her hand about, smirking as she noticed Joel continue to bounce JJ in his arms. Giggling out, JJ reached out to grab a hold of Joel’s face when Joel puffed his cheeks out.

“Is JJ short for something?” Y/N wondered, looking back at Joel who was whispering something to JJ before peppering kisses over the little boy’s cheeks.

“Jesse Joel,” Ellie was quick to respond, having Joel lift his head up to stare out at her with a proud expression. “He’s named after his father and well, the man that saved my life a long time ago. It’s just easier to call him JJ so we don’t get confused.”

“That’s beautiful,” Y/N acknowledged, happy to hear that kind of thing. For the longest time, Y/N didn’t think Joel had anyone. He was so lonely, but seeing that Joel had Ellie, JJ and Tommy in his life was a good thing. “Jesse? I’ve heard that name somewhere…”

“Oh, he works at the inn,” Joel reminded her pulling her attention from Dina and Ellie. That’s when it struck her that Tommy mentioned the name when he was lecturing Joel and Y/N at the inn not long ago.

“He’s here somewhere,” Dina explained, circling her finger in the air. Really, she didn’t know where Jesse was at the moment. Loud laughter spilled from JJ as he played with Joel’s hair. It had been so long since they had gotten to spend time with Joel that she never really realized how in awe of Joel JJ was. “I’m sure you’ll get to meet him at some point. He makes his presence known.”

“Hey there JJ,” another voice interrupted them by placing their hand in over Joel’s shoulders. Gazing over his shoulder, Joel saw Maria standing behind him and she nodded her head toward an empty corner of the house. “Do you mind if I steal Joel for a second?”

“Sure, we’ll keep Y/N safe,” Ellie promised with a wink, reaching out to grab Y/N’s wrist to pull her in closer to her and Dina.

Even though Joel wasn’t entirely too comfortable leaving Y/N, he followed Maria regardless. Once they were alone, Maria started to speak softly, “I just want you to know that I asked my family to tone it down today. They promised that they would be respectful and bite their tongues. I asked them to do it for me. So you don’t have to worry about my father making a smart remark today.”

“Yeah?” Joel was relieved to hear that as he adjusted JJ in his arms. For a long time Maria wasn’t always incredibly fond of Joel herself, but she managed to seem to start liking him more over the last few years. Moving forward, Joel used his free arm to hug her tightly, surprising Maria at the movement. Pressing a kiss against her forehead, Joel sighed and stepped back. “You have no idea how much I appreciate that.”

“I have an idea,” she replied, reaching out to place her hand in over the center of Joel’s chest. “Don’t fuck this up, Joel. This woman really loves you. I hope you know that. Even against better judgement with how fast this has been, I can see it in the way she looks at you. The way she talks about you…”

“I don’t want to fuck this up,” Joel stressed to her, exhaling loudly when he gazed upon Y/N talking with Ellie and Dina. Something Y/N said managed to make the two girls laugh out loud and it made him smile. How quickly she connected with the people in his life was amazing. Plus, even though he mentioned it to no one, he heard Y/N and Maria together the yesterday talking about Sarah. Joel knew what he meant to Y/N. “I like the way this feels.”

“I like to hear that Joel,” Maria tipped up on her toes to return the kiss against Joel’s cheek before moving off to continue to prepare the dinner that she was finishing up for everyone.

Going to head back to the women, Joel stopped when he saw the door open. When his eyes fell upon the person walking in with Maria’s father, he felt his heart drop. Stepping forward, Joel grunted when Tommy cut him off before he could head in that direction.

“You invited Seth?” Joel snapped at Tommy, his brow line creasing when Tommy hushed him and urged him to step back toward another area of the home. That relaxed demeanor that Joel had? Yeah, that was quickly gone once he saw the man that was known in the town for being the biggest asshole. “Fucking Seth? Tommy! What the fuck? Do you know what he did to Ellie?”

“Yeah, I was there when you two butted heads,” Tommy recalled, making sure that Seth got a good distance away before finally stepping back. The older man in town known for causing trouble at The Tipsy Bison was never someone that Joel got along with well. “Maria’s father found out that he was alone for Christmas and he invited him. Maria nor I really had a say.”

“He’s a homophobic piece of shit,” Joel snarled, trying to contain his anger while he held onto JJ who was staring up at Joel with his big eyes. “He’s lucky I didn’t break his nose for the way he talked to Ellie that day. I can’t believe you have him here.”

“You invited Seth?” Ellie’s voice interrupted the two of them with Tommy dramatically throwing his hands up in the air. “Why the hell did you invite him?”

“I didn’t! Neither did Maria. Maria’s father did because he felt bad for Seth for being alone,” Tommy turned on his heel, his dark eyes surveying both Dina and Y/N following Ellie not far behind. “It’s just one dinner. We’re all at one very big, long table that we put across the dining room and the living room. He’s at one corner, you guys are at another corner. I promise you, it’s gonna be fine.”

“He was alone on Christmas cus’ he’s a fuckin’ prick Tommy,” Joel snarled, carefully handing JJ back to Dina who accepted him readily in her arms. “I’m pretty fucking sure neither of us would have come if we would have known Seth was gonna be here.”

“Which is why I didn’t tell you,” Tommy reasoned with them, opening himself up so he was able to talk to both Joel and Ellie. “He’s just stayin’ for dinner and that’s it. I promise. He won’t linger.”

“I’m guessing this guy is bad news?” Y/N spoke up feeling bad that both Joel and Ellie seemed to be upset with what was going on. They were on edge and she could see it from the moment that man walked through the door. Both of their body language changed as soon as they saw him.

“Yes,” both Joel and Ellie answered at the same exact time very firmly. It had Tommy stressed with him dropping his head down and pinching at the bridge of his nose.

“Trust me, I don’t want him here either,” Tommy assured them both, placing his hand in over the center of his chest to express how he felt about the entire situation. “I know you both are upset, but I would really just like to have my family here with me. Maria has this big family and all I have is you two. So please, if you can just keep it together for today…”

“That’s asking a lot Tommy. He’s a prejudiced asshole,” Ellie reminded Tommy under her breath letting out a tense sound. But by the expression that Tommy was giving her, she knew this meant a lot. “But because I care about you I’ll shut up. But if he opens his mouth…”

“Then he deserves whatever he gets,” Tommy interrupted Ellie, lifting his hands up and pointing back toward the kitchen. “I need help carrying things to the table. Would you two please help me while Dina and Y/N here get settled in at their spots at the table.”

Agreeing to help Tommy, it was hard to really shut down the idea that the town’s biggest asshole would be eating dinner with them today, but they knew they couldn’t fight any further about it. Seth was already here and there was no changing it.

At dinner, Joel remained entirely too quiet for Y/N’s liking. There was potential with things going well originally when they showed up, but after the arrival of this Seth? Things went down south. Instead of talking or trying to socialize with anyone, Joel just kept his head down. Unless someone was directly talking to him or mentioning him, Joel didn’t add anything to the conversations that were being had.

Many times throughout dinner, she would place her hand under the table to hold his. Giving it a firm squeeze showed him that she was there for him and was his support system. No matter what was happening. Often, people would talk to her. About her life and who she was. Asking her medical questions or simple things like how she was enjoying Jackson. At the start? It was all pretty easy to handle. Their curiosity was there and she tried to play friendly as well as she could.

“So, what was a big New York City doctor doing coming out here?” a voice that hadn’t spoke up yet called out from the other side of the long table that they were seated at. The voice had drawn Joel’s attention and it was then she realized that it was Seth. The man that had upset Joel and Ellie with just being there. “I mean, if you’re such an important surgeon in New York, what are you still doing here?”

“It’s a long story,” Y/N noticed there was a demeaning tone in Seth’s words, but she wasn’t going to let it bother her. “But as far as being here? I’ll have to head back soon. I guess my future there really doesn’t matter because I’ve decided to move to Jackson to be with Joel.”

A few of Maria’s family dropped their silverware, obviously surprised to hear that the woman Joel had only just met was moving that fast, “I figure once I get everything in order back in New York, I can get settled here and maybe join the team at the hospital in town. Or I could open my own place…”

“That’s probably a good idea,” Seth spoke up, getting a confused expression from most of those that were at the table. “I’d assume the people in charge of the hospital in New York wouldn’t be entirely too comfortable once they got the news. Hell, I wonder if the hospital staff here would be okay with it either.”

“What news?” Ellie spoke up this time, her young face twisting in confusion. Answering for Y/N was probably rude, but she felt protective of this new woman in Joel’s life. Especially when it came to the asshole she had many encounters within the past that always led to some kind of fight.

“That she’s dating someone like Joel,” Seth retorted and this time it had Tommy coughing, the color draining from his face when he looked over to Joel. Instead of reacting, Joel lowered the fork that he was holding and turned his stare over toward Seth. Maria whispered something to her father and her father was trying to stop things from going further, but the older man shook his head with his jaw flexing. “I mean it. D’you really think anyone you worked for would be okay with you dating a murderer? One that has a nasty habit of beating people damn near to death to the point that they are a bloody pulp. I mean sure, he somehow always got away with it with a slap on the wrist, but that kind of shit gets around don’t you think?”

“Enough,” Tommy demanded from Seth, his dark eyes glaring out at the older man who simply just smirked and shrugged his shoulders. Tommy didn’t lie, he went into protective brother mode the moment that Seth started to say something shitty, but by Joel’s expression and the way the color drained from Joel’s face? The damage was already done. “One more word…”

“And what?” Seth snapped, pushing his chair back and throwing his hands up in the air. “Don’t you think she deserves to know what kind of man she is risking her whole life for? Hell, he can run from the things he did, but your past always comes up to bite you in the ass. How many times were you arrested for your violent outbursts Joel? Does she know about those? Or how you and your last woman got in trouble back in Boston? What was it the two of you were doing again? Dealing?”

“That’s it…” Ellie dropped her silverware and stood up from the table ready to take out the man that was running his mouth. A moment later, Joel was reaching up to grab a hold of Ellie’s arm to stop her from moving. Shaking his head, he motioned her to sit back down and he cleared his throat. “Joel? This is bullshit.”

Turning his head, Joel’s dark eyes narrowed when he looked over Y/N. His lips parted like he was going to say something, but then he simply just sighed. Getting up from the table, Joel grabbed his jacket from the back of his chair and nodded toward the front door, “Maria, you’ll have to excuse me. I’m gonna head out.”

Moving around the table caused people to whisper since they expected Joel to snap, but instead of responding to the things that Seth was saying, he instead decided to leave. Having trouble pushing her chair out from the table, Y/N was quick to get up and follow after Joel. Unlike Joel, she wasn’t polite about it nor did she even acknowledge anyone as she chased after Joel.

“Joel,” Y/N called out to him, doing her best to keep up. Slamming the door shut behind her, she stumbled down the stairs and into the snow that started to fall during their time in Tommy’s house. By now Joel had reached the gate to the yard and stopped when he heard her voice. Not turning to look at her had her worried as she moved down the sidewalk. “What are you doing?”

“You should stay. Enjoy the rest of the dinner,” Joel muttered, just barely being heard when she got closer. Looking back over his shoulder, he realized that she had left without grabbing her jacket. Huffing out, he moved toward her and wrapped his jacket around her shoulders after he took his off. “I should have never come here in the first place.”

It sounded like there was yelling coming from the house and it made Y/N look back over her shoulder. Right when Joel was about to leave, she reached for his wrist and shook her head, “I don’t care what people say about you Joel. I don’t. I told you that I loved you and I meant it. Whatever happened in your past was your past. All I know is that I love you. I love you with everything that I am.”

Something about her words was making him emotional with his eyes burning over with tears. His Adam’s apple bounced in his throat with him forcing himself to look away from her. Before he could even respond, there was a disgusted breath coming from behind them.

“That’s real fucking sweet honey, but you might want to consider the man standing before you is poison,” Seth’s voice returned causing Y/N to let out a frustrated breath when she turned on her heel to see the silver haired man pulling on his jacket as he left the house. “Just ask anyone who is in his life. You should probably do your research before you decide to spend forever with someone.”

“Haven’t you had enough?” Y/N snapped at Seth stepping forward when he got to the bottom step. An amused smirk tugged at his features when Y/N shook her head. “Are you out just to make people miserable? People have empathy for you and you decide to use that as an excuse to be an asshole? You didn’t have to follow us out here.”

“I wasn’t following you out here sweetie. Baby Miller and his wife just threw me out,” Seth explained, pointing back toward the house and now it made sense where the screaming was coming from. “I was just leaving and heard what you said. I however do have empathy for you which is why I’m telling you this. Joel Miller is poison. He’s a horrible person that ruins the lives of anyone near him. Which is why I’m saying this. You don’t deserve that.”

“Shut up,” she warned Seth, shoving into his chest when he took a step forward noticing that Joel was in a vulnerable state. In that moment, Seth was taking advantage of it in the best way he knew how.

“Honey, I’m not saying anything that isn’t true,” Seth defended himself, throwing his hand up in the direction of Joel. “There is a reason people are scared of Joel here. They either respect him or they avoid him out of fear. Just ask him about Tommy. Tommy was a fucking mess when he came to town. And it was his brother’s fault. Or why don’t you ask him about his dead girlfriend that he had back in Massachusetts. The one that he got in trouble with? Ask him about how she got in the crossfires of a bad deal that they were running. Ask Ellie, he poisoned her life too. She wouldn’t even talk to him for months because of his disgusting past. I guess the best example would be Joel’s dead daughter. Why don’t you tell her about that Joel? How you being a shitty father led to your daughter’s death. How about we talk about the men you hurt? Or better yet the man you killed?”

That struck the fire inside of Joel with him approaching Seth who looked like he was fully ready to have a fight. Placing her hand in over the center of Joel’s chest, Y/N knew that Joel had every right to attack this man but she didn’t want Seth getting what he obviously wanted in this moment.

“I’m guessing you knew none of that, right?” Seth confirmed, looking to Y/N and avoiding that Joel was in his face looking like he was ready to rip the limbs from his body. “There is a reason Joel would avoid telling you those things sweetheart.”

Grunting out, Joel shook his head. There was anger and rage flooding through his veins, but he wasn’t about to let this asshole bait him into doing what he wanted. Turning on his heel, he headed for the gate again. Instead of reacting to the things Seth said, Joel was leaving. And that left her furious for him, “Go fuck yourself Seth.”

Going to follow Joel, she heard Seth scoff out with him following them toward the exit, “I was just trying to warn you, y’know? But I can’t help that for some reason you decided to be a slut and sleep with someone you only just met. How you fell in love with him is…”

A moment later, Joel was spinning around on his heel. Somehow he managed to get completely around Y/N before stepping in front of Seth who looked happy to see that he got Joel’s attention, “What? Does it bother you that I called your girlfriend a slut? Everyone knows what she said at the bar that night Joel. Things get around fast in town.”

“You’re a pathetic, small man,” Joel insisted, his eyes narrowing with his breathing incredibly broken. Beside him, Joel’s fists were clenched at his sides and he shook his head slowly. “It must destroy you that someone like me could find love because you never will. You’re a pathetic, hateful, old man that no one likes or cares for. And when you die, not a single soul will care that you are gone Seth. Cus’ you’re trash. You’re scum. You filled this world with so much hate, that people will be glad that you’re gone. The world will be a better place when you finally leave it.”

With an angered sound, Seth reared back and hit Joel who barely seemed effected. He just turned his head with the hit. Turning his attention back to Seth, Joel nodded his head and grunted, “Thank you.”

Gasping out, Y/N watched Joel tackle Seth onto the hard pavement leaving her surprised when Joel hit Seth with several punches. Considering what to do, she stepped forward and called out Joel’s name. Turning his head, Joel’s dark eyes narrowed and he cleared his throat. Lowering his fist, Joel frowned and started to get up from the ground.

Instead of just accepting that the fight was over, Seth tried to scramble to his feet to fight further with Joel, but Y/N was doing her best to press into Joel’s chest to get him to back up. In that moment, his swing that was meant for Joel connected with the side of Y/N’s face and it had her stumbling back into Joel who caught her.

“Oh, fuck…” she hissed out at the pinging sensation that was in her face. Pushing herself up from Joel’s arms she could see that Seth was as white as a ghost, clearly shocked that he had hit her instead. Without saying a thing, she reared back and firmly punched Seth in the center of the face leaving a cracking sound filling the air. “You fucking asshole.”

“You stupid bitch,” Seth blurt out, pulling his hand away from his face to see that she had undoubtedly broken his nose. It looked like Seth was about to advance at her when Joel shoved his way between them. And any chance of Joel stopping now was gone.

So quickly Joel had gotten Seth down onto the ground where both of them were throwing fists. Although it was no use because Joel was so much stronger than Seth. Seth’s face was proof of that. It was a short amount of time, but it was enough for Joel to do incredible damage before Tommy was wrapping his arms around Joel’s waist dragging him back through the snow. Ellie had stepped between them holding her hands up trying to get Joel to calm himself.

In his eyes, it was obvious that Joel was lost to rage with his breathing labored. One of Maria’s family members was checking on Seth while Y/N moved in beside Joel to try to calm him. Seth was slurring out swear words and threats with Tommy trying to order his brother to let it go.

“I’m calling the police. He’s going to jail for assault,” Seth threatened, clearly throwing out the one thing that he was attempting to get from Joel this whole time. “You’re going to jail this time Joel. And you’re not going to get out of it.”

“Good luck with that one,” Maria’s voice called out from the porch drawing her family member to move away from Seth back over to her. “I have cameras installed. And from the window I saw you hit Joel first. And then you hit Y/N. As far as I’m concerned? It was self-defense. And I’ll provide the video to prove it. We welcome you into our home Seth and this is the shit you pull? Unbelievable.”

Spitting out the blood that was in his mouth, Seth dropped back into the snow and whispered what Y/N was pretty sure was a few choice words he had for Maria. Hissing out, Joel pulled away from Tommy and Y/N watched as he pushed open the gate to walk across the street toward his home. Tommy and Ellie looked panicked about everything.

Moving to Seth, Y/N stared down at him. Blood covered his face and it was obvious that he would be swollen later. Reaching up, she dragged her finger over her bottom lip where there was blood from her split lip that Seth’s hit had given her. Grunting out, she brought her foot into Seth’s ribs making him groan out with her hit. Shaking her head, she moved around Seth to head for Joel’s home. From the corner of her eye she could see that both Tommy and Ellie were shocked to see what she had done. But she didn’t care.

Heading back to Joel’s home, she let out a surprised sound when she found Joel at the door with a first aid kit and a pack of frozen peas, “Joel?”

“Come here,” Joel reached for her hand, getting the door shut before he led her back toward the couch in the living room. Urging her to sit down, he moved in beside her and prepared everything. Faintly grabbing at her face, he looked her over before reaching for the first aid kit. Cleaning up her split lip, Joel frowned and she could see that he was upset. “More than anything I wanna kill him for hittin’ you.”

“I kicked him in the ribs for it as I was leaving,” she informed him, a lump growing in her throat with how delicately he was cleaning her up and taking care of her. By the way he didn’t respond, she wondered if he even heard her. He was so locked in on her being hurt that she could tell he was only focused on that. After he was done, he reached for the bag of frozen peas and placed it over her face where Seth hit her. “Joel?”

Swallowing down hard, Joel had a hard time looking at her while he took care of her, “Please, I can see it in your face that you’re thinking bad things. I’m okay.”

“You got hit because of me,” his voice was broken, his jaw flexing when she lifted her hand to curl her fingers around his wrist. Grasping both his hands in hers, she caressed her fingers over the back of his hands realizing his knuckles were bloodied. “It was my fault.”

“It was Seth’s fault,” she corrected Joel, shaking her head when she realized where this was headed. “Not yours. I inserted myself into something and he was an asshole. He should have kept his mouth shut is what he should have done.”

“He’s not wrong about me Y/N,” his hands were tremoring with her gentle caress over his battered hands. What Seth had said had visibly shaken him up and he shrugged his shoulders. “I’m poison. I really am. And I was a fool to think that I wouldn’t hurt you because…”

“Hey,” she tried to calm him, reaching her left hand up to palm in over the side of Joel’s face. Misery flooded into his dark eyes and she shook her head. “We’ve already talked about this. You can’t poison me, I’m a doctor,” with a half smirk, she tried to get him to smile, but it wasn’t working this time. “I’ve got remedies for that kind of shit.”

“I’m being serious,” Joel stressed to her, but she didn’t really care what he was saying. They had been on this topic many times already.

“So am I Joel,” she frowned, releasing a saddened breath when he let go of her hands and lowered his head down. Cupping his face in her hands again, she forced him to look at her and she could see that he was crying. “I don’t care. I don’t care what you did. I don’t care who you did what to. I love you. And some asshole isn’t going to change that.”

“But loving me is gonna get you hurt,” he released a noise that sounded like a whimper. How he looked broke her heart. It looked like he was on the verge of having a break down and that was the last thing she wanted. “I loved my daughter Sarah more than anything in the world. She was the best thing that ever happened to me. When her mom took off on us, I promised I would do everything to take care of her. And I couldn’t keep that promise. I…”

“You don’t have to do this,” she assured him, sweeping her fingers over the sides of his face when he started to cry. Yesterday when Maria showed her the photo booklet she had learned that Joel lost his daughter tragically, but she didn’t want to force him to experience that pain. “You don’t have to explain things to me. The last thing I want you to do is hurt yourself telling me things because I love you.”

“And that’s why you deserve to know,” he stressed to her, leaning into her touch. His breathing was labored, his southern drawl growing deeper as he started to speak again. “I know Maria told you about Sarah. I was in the hallway yesterday when she did.”

There seemed to be a sense of panic that flooded through her when Joel shook his head, “Sarah’s mother abandoned us when she was a baby. Took off on the both of us. I tried to be the best father I could be, but I was working all the time. I was taking care of us. I was running my own business. I was just barely keeping our heads above water. Tommy was a fucking mess and I had to take care of him too. I was having to bail him out of jail consistently at that time. We lost our parents young and we didn’t have a good relationship with them. I did everything I could to help Tommy, but he had this savior complex. He had gone off to the war and he was getting in so much trouble. I did my best, but I was drowning. Life was so hard.”

Joel’s voice was breaking causing him to stop speaking every so often in attempts to control himself. A lot of the relationship between Tommy and Joel was making sense now with him opening up to her about their past, “And I wasn’t the best father I could have been. In a lot of ways Sarah was taking care of me. On my birthday when I had just turned thirty-six…”

That was where Joel broke, his head dropping down into his palm and she didn’t know how to respond with him growing so emotional, “I had to work all day. I came home to find that she went to the city all on her own to get the band on my watch fixed. I was always late to things and I kept complainin’. I was supposed to bring a cake home to celebrate, but I forgot. We fell asleep watching movies together. I was so tired that I didn’t wake up when Tommy kept calling me. He got himself in trouble again and he was coming over to talk. He needed someone to talk to. She picked up the phone and she just wanted me to be able to sleep cus’ I wasn’t sleeping well. She just went outside to go wait for Tommy. She was shooting some baskets and this drunk asshole was racing down our street. Her ball rolled into the middle of the street and he didn’t stop…”

Sliding closer beside Joel, she could hear his crying by now and he had to stop completely. He was shaking, and she leaned in to hold him. Right now there was nothing she could do to console him other than wrap him up in her arms.

It took a while until he could finally get the strength to speak up again, “Tommy saw it happen. The guy fucking took off. And he didn’t know whether to chase after the guy or help Sarah. But he stayed with Sarah and got me. That son of a bitch hit my baby and just took off. My baby died on my birthday because I was too exhausted to wake up and answer my damn phone. She just wanted to be there for Tommy and…”

“Joel, I am so sorry,” she stroked her fingers through his messy hair wanting to comfort him, but she knew there was no way she could ever ease that pain for him. Everything about Joel suddenly made sense to her, but it still broke her heart to hear. Especially with it happening on his birthday. “But that wasn’t your fault.”

“But it was,” Joel refused to believe that, his voice breaking when he shook his head and pulled slightly away from her. “So many factors led to that happening. And it’s all on my shoulders. I just lost it after I lost her. The guy that hit her was found. And he was drunk as a skunk. Blasted off his ass. It was his fault, but somehow he got the minimal amount of time when it came to punishment because he knew people. I didn’t think it was fair. My life fell apart. I drank, I tried…I tried killing myself, but I just couldn’t. And then when I found out this guy was released from jail? I became obsessed with him. I wanted him dead. He didn’t deserve to breathe the air he was, he killed my baby girl.”

“And I’d want him dead too,” she reasoned with him, realizing that in the same situation she would likely do the same thing he did. Thinking about things, it began to strike her just how alike they were. Her family died in a car crash that she blamed herself for and his daughter died in a way he blamed himself. “I’d do the same thing Joel.”

“No, you don’t understand. I’d follow him. And the son of a bitch was still drinking and driving. Risking other people’s babies out there, putting them in harm’s way with the way he was driving. He wasn’t even supposed to be driving anymore. But he was. I followed this man every night preparing myself to kill him. I was gaining the courage to do it. It shouldn’t have taken as long as it did,” he explained to her, holding his hand out and waving it about while he spoke. There was passion in his words and he shook his head. “On the night I decided I was finally gonna do it, I found him assaulting a woman. So I went nuts. I beat the hell outta him. And I could have killed him that night, but this time? He couldn’t get away with almost killing a woman. At the last minute I decided to stop and call the police. He was gonna go to jail for real this time for what he had done. It still wasn’t justice, but it would be longer. Multiple women stepped forward after he got in trouble. He was gonna go away for a long time. They had put him in an ankle monitor while awaiting trial. He found out who I was and decided if he was gonna go to jail he was gonna go for what he considered a good reason. So he broke into my home. He had a shotgun with him and I fought him off with a baseball bat that ended up breaking in our fight. I had the upper hand. I was choking the life outta him and I woulda killed him. But then he took the broken handle of the bat and somehow stabbed me with it. It’s how I ended up with the scar on my stomach. I was bleeding profusely because it got pulled out…”

“I understand why you killed him Joel,” she repeated, realizing that he was having the hardest time continuing. His dark eyes were so upset and she didn’t want him to have to go through all this pain in telling her what happened. “You don’t have to tell me how you killed him because…”

“He didn’t,” a voice interrupted her causing her to lift her head to see that Tommy was standing at the entrance of the room with his hands buried in his pockets. Joel turned pale with Tommy saying what he had. Shifting on his feet, Tommy looked down almost ashamed. “I was staying with Joel back then cus’ I was scared he would kill himself. I saw what was happening when I got home. I grabbed the shotgun and when he went to kill my brother I shot him. My brother never killed no one. But the police would have hammered me if they found out I did it. I was a trained soldier. I knew where to shoot him just to knock him down. Stop him from killin’ Joel, but I shot him and killed him.”

“Tommy,” Joel’s voice rumbled with Tommy getting emotional himself. There were tears sliding down Joel’s face with Joel shaking his head.

“No Joel. It’s time someone knew the truth. It was my fault that Sarah was outside. I watched that son bitch hit Sarah. I watched my niece die in my brother’s arms. The man was about to kill the only family I had left. So I killed him without thinkin’ about it. Joel knew they’d hit me hard for it cus’ of my past. I had gotten in trouble so much that he took the fall for everything. He staged it to make it seem like he was the one that killed the guy in self-defense. They didn’t punish him cus’ of all the evidence they had on that son of a bitch.”

“Tommy,” Joel whispered, his face twisting with confusion as Tommy stepped forward and shook his head slowly.

“I know Joel, we both agreed we’d never say that again, but she needs to know you’re a good man. And so do you,” Tommy defended his brother, seemingly upset that everything led to this. “Sarah wasn’t your fault. And you knew that for a while. You were so mad at me because it was my fault. I was the one always getting in trouble. She was outside cus’ of me. Waiting for me. If I hadn’t called she would have never gotten hit. And then after I killed that guy, I should have never abandoned you, but I did. I was messed up and I found this place. I healed and you went into a spiral because you had no one. You got mixed up in some bad shit and it was my fault. Not yours. And no one knows it because you never let them know it. You carry the burden and the weight of something that was never yours to carry in the first place. Sarah wasn’t your fault. You aren’t a murderer. Yeah, you beat the hell outta some guys, but they fucking deserved it for what they did to Tess. You’ve had a hard life, but you remain to live for others. You take care of others. You can’t let this shit destroy you.”

There was a silence that fell over them and Y/N reached out to caress over Joel’s shoulder in a loving way as Tommy started to speak again, “I told Maria. A while ago. I should have told you, but I couldn’t keep lyin’ to her. I couldn’t keep lyin’ to myself. Now two people in the world know beyond us.”

“I…” Joel looked between Tommy and Y/N and he almost dropped his head in shame. “I’d like to be alone for a while if that’s okay.”

“Yeah,” Tommy looked shocked that was what Joel requested of him, but he gave a small nod. Swallowing down hard, Tommy didn’t want to get emotional to the point that this became about him. He was doing his best to hold back on his own tears. “I’ll leave the two of you alone together.”

“No,” Joel called out to Tommy, his dark eyes locking with Y/N’s when he let out a tremoring breath. “I want you both to leave. I wanna be alone. I need to be to myself right now to think about things. So would you please take her with you. Take her back to the inn.”

“Joel?” she frowned as he slid out from beneath her touch, surprising her with his movements. “I don’t think right now is the best time for you to be alone. With your past and the way…”

“I’m not gonna hurt myself, I promise,” Joel stopped her immediately, trying to put her worries at ease. “I wouldn’t do that to the people I love and care about. Just please. I need to be alone right now. So please leave. Please.”

“Joel, I agree with her that you shouldn’t be alone,” Tommy grunted from where he was standing, pointing his hand out toward Y/N. “The last thing you need right now is to be alone.”

“If you love me, if you truly love me…” Joel started, his teary eyes looking to hers when he gave her a nod, “then you will leave right now with Tommy. You can come back in the morning, but right now. I need time alone.”

“Joel,” she tried to speak again, but he hushed her. Standing up from the couch, he headed for the stairs. Sitting there, she didn’t know what to do as he headed to his bedroom and they heard him close the door behind him. “Tommy? What do I do?”

“I…I don’t know,” Tommy frowned, shakily sweeping his fingers through his long hair realizing this was something he had no answer for. “I don’t know what’s the right thing to do here Y/N. I just don’t.”

----

Tags: @pedrospascaled @carolineesnell @ayumi-wolf @dilfsandmartinis @christinamadsen

@brittmb115 @thegirlwiththemostcake3 @ashleyfilm

#Joel Miller #Joel Miller fanfiction #Joel Miller x reader #Pedro Pascal #The Last of Us #Pedro Pascal Character fanfiction #Joel Miller x you #Joel Miller Smut #The Last of Us fanfiction #tlou fanfiction #Christmas in Jackson #Joel Miller Imagine #Tommy Miller #Ellie Williams

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thoughtsforsoob · 1 year ago

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asking them to buy you pads :( - nct dream

a/n: period season has unfortunately come for me (is it really unfortunate or does that just mean I’m not pregnant 😁 lmao probably not even possible bc I have no bf nor many male friends). Anyways, I hope you enjoy!! I am going to try to do some more writing formats instead of texts but let me know which of you two you guys like best. Thank you and remember that requests are always open :D

mark

To me he seems like a very caring boyfriend. This scenario doesn’t take place very often because he keeps you stocked up all the time if you forget. For the sake of this post, let’s say that you’re at home and he’s on tour. You’re stuck at home, crying to him on the phone about how you forgot to stock up on pads. He’s being the most sympathetic person ever and comforting you while ordering you pads to be delivered. He also throws in some groceries and sweets because you probably weren’t up to going shopping. When it arrives, you groan when he tells you to go to the door but immediately your eyes light up as you see the large delivery. “Anything for my girl. So sorry I can’t be there to make it better :(“

renjun

He didn’t even need to be asked to get more. He either has more or he noticed and went to the store before coming home. So, you get your period that evening and when he’s on the drive home, you call him crying like never before and he’s worried. You tell him your situation and how silly you feel. “I’ll stop by the store. I should be home soon okay? Don’t even worry about it. I’ll also make you something warm to eat and drink for dinner.” He was tired, sure, but you needed him and he loved that.

jeno

jeno is the cutest bf on earth hello???!!! Keeps a period tracker on your phone and one morning, he got the notification that your period should be coming on that day. He trusted it and slipped out of bed, running to the pharmacy and the convenience store to get what he needed for a period care pack. He decided to make one for you ever since you two have been together as a sweet little tradition. You woke up when he was gone and panicked. You called him and cried to him about him leaving, “see you leaving me forever?? I miss you Jen, please come back to me I’ll do anything!” He laughs, “silly girl, I’m just getting your care pack. Your period should be here today.” He comes back home asap and comforts you all day.

haechan

This guy is so silly that he tells you no!! what a silly guy hahaha *my eye is twitching as I type this* You ask him to pick up some pads for you and his way home from schedule and he’s like “nah I don’t wanna. You go do it.” You immediately start to fight back and tell him in a serious tone, “unless you want me to trail blood all over our apartment and then faint in the way to the store, please go get me some pads.” BLOOD? Haechan immediately reconsiders and asks to stop at the store when being driven home.

jaemin

Such a gentleman! Jaemin will never ever say no to you when it comes to asking him to buy you personal care items. He makes sure you get the best quality brand and that you have everything else you might need. Want a ice cream that only is made at a creamery 20 miles away? Done. Want noodles from your favorite spot in the next town over? Don’t even have to ask. He makes sure you’re comfortable the whole time and even tells the kitties to be gentle with their mommy.

chenle

Doesn’t want to show it but he’s so nervous. He might try to tell you no by saying something along the lines of, “you’re so irresponsible why did you not buy more if you knew it was coming soon? plus, this isn’t manly at all.” you threw the hardest pillow you own at his head and start to sob so he takes his ass to the store. he starts to feel bad so he grabs what you need and picks up your comfort take out on the way home. don’t worry, he’ll even cuddle you and feed you if you so wish when he arrives home.

jisung

He’s so nervous. The only reason he goes is because he knows you absolutely need them and he doesn’t wanna get in your bad side when your hormones are all out of wack. When he realizes he forgot to ask you for a picture of the box you need and then you don’t answer calls or texts, he panics. He’s hesitates but ends up asking a store clerk what to get :( he’s so embarrassed but the clerk, noticing how shy he was, commended him for his bravery and helped him select the pads. he buys them plus some candy :)

#nct dream x reader #nct dream texts #nct dream fluff #nct dream imagines #nct fluff #nct texts #nct imagines #nct dream #nct #mark x reader #renjun x reader #jeno x reader #haechan x reader #jaemin x reader #chenle x reader #jisung x reader

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hazyange1s · 3 months ago

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WIP Tag Game

Thank you for tagging me @myokk 🥰🥰 your writing ashdjdns I need that one shot asap

Currently, writing is an uphill battle for me 😭 this is the longest I’ve gone without being able to find any sort of ~ flow ~ but we’re trying to power through lmao

unsure of everyone who’s been tagged already so sorry if you have! @ps-cactus @morelikeravenbore @galaxiasgreen @writingsoftarnishedsilver

some very expected angst from part 2 of enshrouded (I posted the first part in the SUMMER good lord) — warning for suggestive dialogue:

His expression betrayed pain, thick brows furrowing as he swiped at the rain trickling into his eyes. “Can you really tell me that you didn’t wonder, even for a moment? That not a single part of you recognized me in any way?”

No reply came. She opened and closed her mouth, tasting bitter rain as her teeth worried at the kiss-swollen flesh of her lower lip.

Now that she was thinking about it…the signs were there: his dancing, his toast; as they’d done many times in their Hogwarts days at the Three Broomsticks, the cologne he still seemed to favor.

Even (and especially) his eyes, which had always spoken more than words could express alone, and the way he moved when they were —

It seemed old habits really did die hard.

”I wish I had realized sooner. Then we both wouldn’t have wasted a perfectly good night.”

Sebastian smiled in that lopsided way of his, like a cat that got the cream. “I’d hardly say it went to waste. You always did enjoy yourself when we were together, and… well, it seems i haven’t lost my touch.”

“I — you —“ she sputtered. “You certainly haven’t lost your touch for mucking everything up, either.”

That wiped the grin off of his stupid, smug face. Sebastian sighed, watching a carriage roll over the uneven street as a streak of lightning illuminated the crease he’d earned between his brows over the years. “So, that’s it, then? Three years apart and a night in bed together haven’t softened your heart towards me?”

If anything, it had only hardened.

Her throat constricted, and her answer came out choked and pathetic and wrong. “Where you’re concerned, I’m not sure I have a heart anymore.”

And to prove it, she stood several steps backwards, turned on her heel, and Disapparated on the spot with a soft crack that echoed through the desolate streets.

And now we check in with Incendiary Seb, who is — coincidentally — also not having a good time. I might change this chapter completely idek 😩

Sebastian had a plan. Several, in fact — although they were less carefully constructed strategies and more spur of the moment strokes of madness.

Plan A was to slip Veritaserum in the wine and pumpkin juice from the kitchens, but he crossed that off the list upon realizing he could hardly interrogate everyone in the Hall at once.

Plan B: find one of the remaining Ashwinder hideouts and interrogate them. He really hoped he wouldn’t have to resort to this one, as he rather preferred his head attached to his body, so —

Plan C brought him to Ominis.

“I have a question,” he caught up to the blonde on their way to Defense class.

“I probably have an answer, but that doesn’t mean I’ll give it to you.” Ominis snipped.

Sebastian barreled on anyway, speaking in hushed tones. “Your family knows people. Do they know, say, any… mercenaries? Assassins? Private investigators willing to get their hands dirty, even?”

Ominis’s lip curled up into a sneer. He stopped in his tracks, nearly causing Sebastian to run right into him.

“I’m going to walk away now and pretend you never said that.”

In all fairness, asking Ominis to be accessory-adjacent to another murder probably hadn’t been his best idea, either. But as the days grew shorter, so did Sebastian’s limited patience as November hurried on, each X on his calendar a reminder of the looming deadline.

Eventually, his ideas ran out, and Plan B it was. In the encyclopedia of Sebastian’s Dumbest Decisions Ever Made, this one might be in the top three — and that was saying something.

#shocker that I forgot about this in my drafts #writing #hogwarts legacy

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emily-hilson · 5 months ago

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(temporarily pinning this because it’s more important than i’m my intro, this is getting so much love i hope you guys won’t be disappointed when you see how shitty my animation actually is)

genuine question:

would you guys watch it if i made a low quality, low effort and low skills animation of that one “house we need to cure this patient” video?

consider the idea of seeing a bad animation made by someone who

1. has to draw with their finger cause their apple pencil died on them last week

2. can’t draw characters so everyone would be a stickman with character traits

3. has never done an animation before

will it suck? it definitely will.

will it be funny? probably not but i’ll try.

this vexes me

(if this hits 20 notes i’ll start it asap)

#house md #house md animation #animation #gregory house #james wilson #lisa cuddy #robert chase #eric foreman #allison cameron #and yeah all the other characters

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ponderingmoonlight · 1 year ago

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Heyyy, i love ur jjk fics so when u posted abt writing for aot i SCREAMED bc ik you'll do it justice 😩❤❤

Do u reckon u could do like a levi post rumbling fic bc i need the confort rn and SO DOES HE I NEED HAPPY LEVI PLSS ❤❤❤🙏🙏🙏

When I tell you I had to write this IMMEDIATELY <3 Please let me know if you like it, this is my first AOT fic EVER

Levi finally getting his happy end with (y/n) after the rumbling

Pairing: Levi Ackerman x fem!reader

Word Count: 2k

Synopsis: When he met you after first stepping a foot at Marley, Levi didn't forget you until the very end. But while he thought you died through the rumbling, he meets you again for his happy end.

Warnings: this is the comfort I needed, I actually had to cry while writing this, not proofread because I wanted to publish this asap

Tags: @sanicsmut begging on my knees, please I hope you like this

You’ve been on his mind ever since he met you on that fateful day at Marley. So gorgeous that he couldn’t take his eyes off you, a smile so sweet it could melt even metal. Yes, you were so different from what he expected to find across that ocean, a truly pleasant surprise to say the least.

“Oh, you are quite small for a grown man!” you commented, giggling so effortlessly that Levi wasn’t able to even react to your rude comment.

“But to be honest, I’m a little small myself. Well, not all of us can be tall, right? Where are you from, stranger?”

“None of your business.”

His voice sounded harsher that anticipated, making your joyful face drop in an instant. Why…Why the hell did it even bother him to see you like that, that sad glow that formed in your eyes?

“I’m not from here”, he added.

“Oh, I see! Don’t worry about it too much, it’s like everywhere else!”

Oh, if you only knew how wrong that statement was.

His eyes landed on your right arm and the star that covered the sleeve of your blouse. Why would you wear such a badge? Upon closer inspection, he noticed your shattered clothing, the hem of your earth coloured dress completely torn.

Before Levi was even able to react two men ran into you, forcefully pushing your body into the dirt of the streets.

“Get out of the way, scum”, one of them hissed towards you.

Anger rose inside his veins immediately. You were just standing there, minding your own business. Why on earth did they push you?

“Watch your step”, his voice suddenly called towards the men.

“Please, it’s alright. Don’t get into trouble because of me.”

And then your hand rested against his shoulders, making his heart beat so loud that Levi swore you could hear it. What was this? Why did your little innocent touch turn him all flustered?

Something about you just seems different. No, despite the fact that it is so wrong, despite being here only for a mission, his mind wanders to you every free second.

Even though you might be dead by now.

“I will leave after tonight”, he announced into darkness, your moonlit features making it hard for him to focus on staying serious.

Your lip began to tremble, glossy eyes darting towards him.

“What? But why do you have to leave? You just arrived…”

“I came here because I have a mission to accomplish, (y/n).”

“But you will return when you’re done, right?”

The hopeful tone in your voice killed him from the inside. Oh, how much he wished he could just take you with him, how much he’d love to have more time with you. But this is simply not possible.

His cold eyes glared at you through the darkness, desperately trying to keep his composure.

“I might never return to this place, (y/n).”

You felt like someone pulled the ground from beneath your feet. Within the last few weeks, you learned that Levi’s hard façade isn’t more than a trick. No, in fact, he carries a character made of pure gold.

You started to like him.

“Then I’ll find you wherever you’ll go.”

And you did. You never missed to write him letters. Levi can’t help but wonder how you did that, your elegant handwriting following him through the darkness of the night, lighting up his mood despite the situation he’s in. Yes, he looked forward hearing from you every single day.

Until the rumbling started.

Until he didn’t receive any letters from you anymore.

It broke his heart, waking up from his coma with all that was on his mind being your stunning smile.

“Did I receive any letters from her?”

“You mean (y/n)? No, not until it all started. She lived in the northern area of Marley so it’s very likely that…”

His heart shattered into a million pieces, dead eyes staring into the distance. Your beautiful smile, that promise you gave him the night before he left. The thought of you getting trampled to death…

“Don’t say it.”

“Hey, maybe she did it somehow. (y/n) is a smart woman. I’m sure she found a way out.”

“Don’t be ridiculous, shitty four-eyes. She’s dead.”

He has seen it all, countless people died in front of his very own eyes. Why would it be different this time? Why shouldn’t you of all people be taken away from him? A little spark of luck, a minor ray of sunshine in this sheer darkness.

He leans back in his wheelchair, darkness consuming him all over again. You deserved so much better, your whole life was still ahead of you. In a world that never wanted you, you always kept your smile as bright as the sun. Despite the fact that they treated you like the dirt underneath their feet, despite how poorly the circumstances were, your smile beamed brighter than anything else.

“What would it give me to burry myself in sadness? I only have this one life, why not making the best of it?”

The best…

“Fuck!” he cries out, slamming a nearby book against the wall in frustration.

Why you? Why out of all the people, you are the one who had to lost her precious life? He never had the chance to tell you how he feels, how you turned his world upside down, that he survived for you.

Dear captain Levi (I love to call you that),

How are you? I hope your mission is going well and that you’ll return soon. I have some exciting news to share with you! After working so much over the last few weeks, I was finally able to buy myself a new dress! Although I wanted to get a white one because I know you love the colour, I bought a dark green one in honour of you. When you come back, we’ll be matching!

I miss you and our conversations late at night. Please tell me you and the others are okay.

In love,

(y/n)

That dark green dress he never got so see, the joy you fuelled inside of him despite being hundreds of miles away from him. God, how much he misses you. How much he fucking misses talking to you through the darkness of the night, to hear from the world through the unwavering veil of your optimism. What would he give to stretch out his hands after you for once, holding you tightly against his chest? It truly kills him from the inside, knowing he will never be able to hold your hand or kiss your lips tenderly, that you’ll never tell him old fairy tales anymore.

You were special. An angel in a world full of devils. Your word alone should have been enough to end every war in the blink of an eye. It definitely was enough to end the war inside himself.

“Captain Levi, will you assist me?”

“Stop calling me that, Onyankopon”, Levi mumbles, silently following the taller man into the heart of the city.

The war made the remaining 20% realize how precious being alive is only after their lives hanging on a thread. While the others carried on with their lives, Levi himself got stuck in this cursed city, the city he last saw you in. Returning to Paradis would mean giving up on you, giving up on the spell you put on him. And he simply can’t take it. Even though the whole town got destroyed by the merciless feet of titans, despite numerous people telling him than no one was able to escape, he always looked out for that dark green dress you described to him.

“Thank you”, a little girl giggles at him, eyes widen at the delicious sight of the lollipop in her hands.

All he can do is stare at the ground in front of her tiny feet with empty eyes. How nice it must be to have something to hold onto in times like these, after losing everything and everyone.

“Hey, can I get another one?”

“Don’t get greedy, young lady!”

That voice, that angelic voice almost reminds him of you. How long has it been since you last spoke to him? So long that the sound of your speech slowly fades in the back of his mind.

But that woman, that woman almost sounds like you. His gaze wanders up her dirty shoes, the hem of her green dress…

A green dress. Dark green, to be exact.

“Levi?”

His eyes widen, his heart stops beating.

No, this can’t be. Is it a dream?

“Levi Ackerman? Is that you?”

His gaze darts towards your face, time stands still. Your facial features, your joyful eyes. It’s you, it has to be you. Without any doubt.

“(y/n)”

He can’t catch his breath, his orbs lingering over your delicate figure, your dark green dress.

That dark green dress.

Before he can stop himself, his eyes get glossy. It is really you. You’re standing in front of him, uninjured, just like you did before.

“Levi!”, you cry out.

In the matter of seconds, you kneel in front of him, hungry arms holding onto his frame for dear life. Oh god, how much you prayed to see that man again, how much you longed to finally be able to hold him in your arms.

“I never gave up hope. I always believed in your abilities and that you’ll return to me someday”, you mutter against his chest, your salty tears soaking through the fabric of his shirt.

“I thought you were dead.”

His voice isn’t more than a fade away whisper, hand running through your soft hair. He always wondered how it would feel against his fingertips. And now you’re here. In his arms, alive.

You are alive.

“I’m fine. I did leave this town just in time because I wanted to see you again. It was a close call, I almost got crushed but…I made it. I couldn’t leave after telling you the fairy tale about the fox and the rabbit, right?”

Silent tears stream down his face like a waterfall while you cry rivers against his chest. His whole life Levi was haunted by loss and grief. As if he was cursed, everyone around him seemed to die in front of his very eyes. Just after letting himself fall, after trusting someone, after gifting them his feelings…They just lost their lives like flies.

But you’re safe and sound, you look just like you did in his memory.

“I love you, (y/n). I should have told you this way sooner and I did all of this just to return to you.”

Your heart sinks in your chest, body overflowing with feelings. Without thinking twice, you press your lips against his scarred ones, letting yourself sink into his lap while your hands hold onto his face for dear life. This man right in front of you, the man who never left your mind, the man who risked his life to save yours. He survived. He survived and came back to you just like you always dreamed of.

“I love you too”, you shriek, smiling at him so widely with tears overflowing in your eyes that you make his world whole again.

“But as you see, I’m not the man you met back then…”, he begins, looking down his disabled body.

You shake your head vehemently, gently taking his hands into yours.

“All I see is the man I love and waited for”, you reply.

You wipe away your tears and a trail of snot in the most unladylike and precious way Levi ever witnessed before standing up and straighten your skirt with trembling hands.

“So now, what do you think? How do you like my now old new dress?” you croak.

You twirl around, making his life complete. This. This is exactly what he fought for, why he never gave up even after Hange dedicated her life. You standing in front of him in that dark green dress, smiling widely after he told you that he loves you.

This is all he ever wanted.

“You look lovely. Absolutely lovely, (y/n)”, he replies.

And for the first time since forever, a genuine smile is formed on his face.

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paintedkinzy-88 · 4 months ago

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I really hate to be this person, but my cat has to get surgery and the cost is really going to wipe us out, unfortunately, so…

I’ve been working on making a RedBubble for prints and such, and I’ll probably get stickers set up on Etsy as soon as I’m able to, but for now I set up a Ko-Fi for a sort of commission-like opportunity.

Until January 16th, I will draw a dragon design for a character of your choice for $25! Not like a full reference sheet, I wanna have the time to get to as many as I can if I need to, but still fully rendered like above. Dragons are the one thing I think I can draw consistently and repeatedly, so I’m sorry it’s nothing more broad! 😭

Rules are under the cut, PLEASE READ THEM before you do anything! ❤️ I am very new with this, so please be patient with me.

Link to my page is here, and I’ll put it on my Masterpost as well.

Thank you, whether you can donate or not. I appreciate all the support you guys have ever given me. (ﾉ´ヮ´)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

REQUEST RULES:

You can place your orders under the Requests section!

The listing will close after January 16th, 11:59 PM PST, and I set my max request slots to 15, so I’m not too overwhelmed lmao.

Leave your Tumblr account in the description box of the request, alongside the requested character, so I may contact you and/or tag you in the completed drawing’s post! If you want to remain anonymous, though, that is totally fine as well.

I will send updates/process pictures unless you tell me otherwise, or you go the anon route!

If you have a certain dragon character already in mind, want an OC done, or have any additional requests for the piece (pose, dragon type, any sort of design specifications), tell me in the instructions! There should be a section for images as well. Or you can message me here, of course!

I WILL be posting every finished piece here, unless told otherwise!

If you do not send specifications, I will design the dragon(s) as I see fit to the character! (ﾉ´ヮ´)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

I cannot promise any kind of time frame for when the drawing will be complete. I do have other things that take up my time. I will try to complete them ASAP!

Should you want more than one character in the same shot, I’d say it’s an extra $10 for each additional design (in the listing). But, if you want each character on their own page, that is a separate order, $25 each.

These are for fully rendered pieces in my style, no backgrounds, and no reference sheets. If you want other options for cheaper, like just a colored sketch, message me first and we can talk about that as well. :)

Depending on how this week goes, I may choose to do this again in the future with more formality and flexibility! This is just a bit of an emergency. ;w;

Message me/send an Ask if you have any questions!!

The Ko-Fi also serves as a sort of tip jar, should you simply want to donate a $5 coffee instead. By all means, if you cannot or don’t want to donate, PLEASE don’t. I just don’t really know what else to do. :/

The above image is one of the designs I made for Ink in UTMV. Further examples of my work are below!

(Note that the drawings will be more like these first two examples!! For price reference, the two characters would have been $35, and the five $65)

#sorry this is kinda informal…#I’ll be better the next time fbjsnfjsn #I’m trying to be as thorough as I can #but I’ve also never done this before #hella nervous but kitty is worth it!!#commission #dragons #dragon art #dragon designs #dragon design #dragon balance au #dragon au #rottmnt #undertale multiverse #undertale #curse of icarus

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0cta9on · 1 year ago

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Unlikely Duet - 6

length: +7k words

Genre: Fluff

NewJeans Minji x Male Reader (OC)

(Author's Note: I could've taken another day to edit this, but I wanted to upload it asap so here it is :^) Hopefully my writing isn't too garbage and I hope y'all enjoy <3)

【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】

Minji’s POV

I could do nothing but pace around my room, anxiety fueling every step. Danielle was supposed to be here 20 minutes ago to drive us to the fair, but on this particular day of all days, she decides to be late. My vice president, the one who I can lean on when I’m overwhelmed with responsibilities and even more of a stickler for rules and punctuality compared to me, is late.

The brunt of my morning was spent avoiding my parents like the plague, staying cooped up in my room and eating my meals as quickly as possible. To them, it probably seems like I’m giving them the silent treatment for what they said last night (which I’m still upset about), but in reality, I was riddled with anxious thoughts and simply avoided speaking in case I accidentally let it slip that I was planning on lying to them. I’ve done it tons of times before, but every single time is nerve wracking. While I hate that it’s gotten to this point, I owe a lot of my sanity to what I’ve been able to get away with by lying. Besides, it’s probably better this way - my parents still believe that I’m their perfect daughter and I still get to have some semblance of a social life.

Like the sonorous tones of a church bell, a resounding ding emits from my phone. They’re here. With shaky hands, I grab my tote bag from my bed and carefully tiptoe down the stairs. Right as I reach the front door, my father calls out to me from the living room.

“Minji? Where are you going?” He asks, a look of curiosity on his face.

“O-oh, uhh, I guess I forgot to tell you this but I was actually planning on going to the library to study with Danielle today.” I grin at him, trying my best to sound convincing. Our eyes lock as he studies my expression for what feels like an eternity. It might just be my stress causing my eyes to play tricks on me, but there seems to be a hint of sadness in his expression, as if he doesn’t want me to go. I shake it off and refocus on the task at hand.

“Well, I better get going-”

“Wait,” he interrupts before leaving the room for a moment. He comes back with a $20 bill in his hands and offers it to me. “Here.”

Panic began to set in. Did he find out I was actually going to the fair? If he did, why would he be giving me money? Shouldn’t he be angry at me for lying to him?

“Um, what’s this for? We’re just going to the library,” I reiterate in hopes that my initial worries were wrong.

“In case you two get hungry after, you should get some snacks. Food fuels the brain.” The relief I felt after he said those words is better than any award I got in my entire academic career up to this point. Normally it would raise red flags for my father to be doing something uncharacteristic like this, but I didn’t care. I’m just glad to almost be free.

“Thanks,” I say as I take the cash. “I’ll see you later then.”

“Don’t stay out too late. Don’t be messing around while studying. And-”

I shut the door behind me before I could hear the rest of his sentence. It was probably some other generic dad advice, like “Don’t talk to strange boys at night” or something like that. The sight of Danielle’s mom’s car parked on the other side of the street was like seeing a boat heading your direction after being stranded on an island for 15 years. Hanni beckoned me from the passenger’s side window, an excited grin painted on her face.

“Hurry up girl, let’s go!!” She shouted. As I open the door to the backseat, Hyein and Haerin wave back at me.

“Hi Minji!”

“Yo.”

“Hi guys, sorry, my dad wanted to talk to me before I left,” I replied as I got in the car. “Danielle, what took you so long, I was pacing around my room for the past 20 minutes anxious out of my mind!”

“I’m sorry, there was something I had to take care of before I could take my mom’s car,” she apologizes as she tampers with the rearview mirror, clearly annoyed with its inability to swivel properly.

Hanni pops her head from the front seat. “Okay y’all, we just need to take a deep breath and calm down. We’re going to the fair to chill out and have fun, let’s not let petty things like this ruin the day before it’s even started, alright?” Haerin and Hyein nod enthusiastically, peering over at me to gauge my reaction. I close my eyes and take a deep breath in order to allow my mind to forget about the stress from my morning. Today is the day that I get to let loose and forget about all the pressures I face in my regular life. Nothing else matters but having fun. As I open my eyes again, I am welcomed by the smiling faces of my four dearest friends (Danielle was especially happy about finally fixing the rearview mirror). My lips curl into a smile as I look back at them.

“Yeah, you’re right, Hanni,” I admit. “Okay, let’s go!!” We all cheer as Danielle steps on the gas. Hanni turns up the radio, blasting a loud pop song that blares out of the windows as we cruise through the neighborhood.

______________________________________________________________

The lights, the sounds, the smells, everything about the fair was overwhelming in the best way possible. Large groups of friends and families meandered along the concrete pathways, talking and laughing as they try their hand at classic carnival games or satiate their hunger with fried food and extravagant sweets. A giant ferris wheel sat in the background, the sunlight peeking through its rotors. A wave of nostalgia washes over me as I’m reminded of old family memories. Before they pressured me into trying to obtain some kind of impossible perfection, I used to be able to exist simply as their daughter, who they loved and played with like any other child.

“Hey Minji, are you okay?” Hyein asks me. I snap out of my thoughts to find the girls looking back at me with concern.

“Yeah, I’m fine, just thinking about something,” I reassure them. “What do you guys wanna do first?”

“I don’t know Ms. President, what do you wanna do?” Hanni asks with a wide grin.

“Well, I guess we can-”

I freeze as I see a familiar face in the distance, intermingled with the crowd. Yuno is here. With the convenience store girl.

______________________________________________________________

Yuno’s POV

“Where the hell did he run off to?” I grumble as I struggle to search for Yujin in the crowd. The fair was more overwhelming than I could’ve imagined - it was difficult navigating through the sea of strangers without accidentally rubbing elbows with them, all while trying to find oxygen through the constant stench of fried foods and sugar wafting through the air. At the very least, the lights were pretty to look at and I would be lying if I said the ferris wheel didn’t pique my interest.

Winter chuckles at my annoyance. “Relax, he’s just getting a corndog. See, he’s on his way over here right now,” she says, gesturing through a gap in the crowd. Lo and behold, Yujin skips towards us with a corndog in hand and a stupid grin on his face.

“Look what I got!” He presents his fried snack to us with the excitement of a child presenting a drawing to their parents. An ungodly amount of ketchup and mustard drips off the corndog, creating a gross glob of orange on the ground.

“Is that healthy?” Winter asks, concern laced in her voice. Her words fall on deaf ears as Yujin chomps off a large piece, covering his mouth in sauce. I chuckle in disbelief, both deeply disturbed and quietly impressed, while Winter hands him a pack of napkins from her purse.

I take the opportunity to look around at my surroundings again. As I gazed out amongst the crowd of smiling faces, I suddenly felt out of place in it all, like I wasn’t allowed to be here. Everything felt so foreign to me, I wasn’t sure if I should feel at ease or on edge. Whether it’s paranoia or just a hunch, I couldn’t get rid of this nagging feeling at the back of my head.

“Hey Yuno?” Winter nudges me.

I turn my attention towards her. “What?”

“Isn’t that the student council president?”

My heart stops for a split second as I look down the other end of her finger. In the heart of the crowd is Minji, huddled around her friends. She’s wearing a simple outfit of a gray collegiate sweater and jeans, yet my eyes were naturally drawn to her like a magnet.

“Y-yeah, that’s her,” I stutter, trying to maintain composure.

“Mm, issa Danielle? Les go shay hi!” Yujin exclaims with a mouth full of food, running toward them before I could stop him.

“God dammit…”

“What’s wrong, do you not wanna say hi?” Winter asks as we follow the trail through the crowd Yujin left behind.

“It’s not that, it’s just… Whatever, let’s just go.” With every step I take, my heart rate begins to accelerate as, once again, fate pulls me towards Minji Kim.

______________________________________________________________

Minji’s POV

He’s coming this way!! Why is he coming this way?? Did he see me? Should I run? No, why would I run? Pull it together, Minji!! Maybe if I pretend I didn’t see him, he’ll just walk past me. Why would I do that?? Agh!!

“Ketchup… and mustard,” Haerin blurts out, drawing puzzled glances from the group. Suddenly, a boy wearing a white eyepatch emerges from the crowd, carrying a corndog smeared with red and yellow condiments.

“Danielle!!” He calls out, waving excitedly. “Hi!”

“Yujin? What are you doing here?” Danielle questions, a hint of surprise present in her voice.

“I’m with my friends!” The boy, Yujin, exclaims as Yuno and the convenience store girl appear behind him, drawing an impish grin from Hanni. I couldn’t help but feel underdressed when compared to convenience store girl’s flowery sundress and cardigan. “I didn’t expect to see you here too! This is great!”

“Uh yeah, I guess it is,” Danielle responds awkwardly before turning to us. “Um, this is Yujin, I’ve been helping him and his grandma out recently.”

“We’re friends!” He adds enthusiastically.

“Yeah, I suppose we are.”

I couldn’t help but giggle at Danielle’s uncharacteristic awkwardness. Normally, she’s the serious voice of reason that stays calm under pressure, yet here she was, looking like an embarrassed older sister flustered by the antics of her younger sibling.

“It’s nice to meet you, Yujin,” I greet warmly. “I’m Minji, also a friend of Danielle’s.”

“Oh, you must be the student council president!” He replies eagerly. “These are my friends, Yuno and Winter. Yuno might look a little scary, but don’t worry, he only fights bad guys. He helped me and Winter out before! And Winter is really shy, but she’s really nice once you get to know her!”

“H-hello,” Winter stutters with a polite smile, while Yuno offers a simple nod. A flush of warmth colors my cheeks as our eyes briefly meet before we both quickly avert our gazes. Unfortunately, Hanni notices this and stifles a laugh, making my cheeks grow even warmer with embarrassment.

“Hello, I’m Hyein!” Our youngest chimes in. “This is Haerin, and that over there is Hanni! It’s nice to meet you all!”

As the group falls into casual conversation, I can’t help but peer over at Yujin’s eyepatch and be reminded of my conversation with Yuno last night. Despite his injuries, he’s chock full of energy and vibrancy that contrasts with Yuno’s usual solitary and soft-spoken demeanor. The difference in their personalities is cute in a way. Winter, on the other hand, shares many similarities with Yuno. Like him, she’s very soft-spoken and a little awkward, but has an aura of kindness around her despite that. I imagine the two of them got along well because of this - for some reason, this fact irks me.

“Since we’re all here to let loose at the fair, why don’t you guys join us? The more the merrier I always say, isn’t that right, Minj?” Hanni says, nudging my ribs with her elbow. I didn’t even have to look at her to know what kind of face she’s making.

Coincidentally, my eyes meet Yuno’s once again, and I quickly break away as I think of what to say. I would hate to butt into Yuno’s time with his friends, but a voice in the back of my head was telling me otherwise.

“Yeah, you guys can join us if you want to,” I say as I give into the voices. My lips curl into a smile, but inside, I couldn’t shake the feeling of butterflies in my stomach. Yuno appears taken aback at my answer as a slight pinkish hue grows on his cheeks. The group moves through the crowd looking for what to do first with Yujin leading the way and Yuno trailing close behind. I stay in the back, letting my complicated feelings fester.

“H-hello, Minji.” Winter’s soft voice interrupts my thoughts, and I turn to find her trailing behind the group alongside me. Her simple makeup look is subtle, yet it perfectly accentuated her natural beauty. Pair that with her cute outfit and she could have any guys she wants. A shiver went through my spine at the thought.

“What’s up?” I ask, trying my best to act natural.

“I just wanted to ask if you’re doing okay. I never got the chance to after what happened that night.”

My mind flashes back to when Yuno and Winter had saved me from that drunk man a couple days ago. I was too terrified and too weak to protect myself, yet this timid girl jumped in front of him to protect me. And here I am, feeling all weird because I think she looks prettier than me.

“I’m doing fine now. Thanks again for that, I owe you one,” I express.

She quickly shakes her head at my offer. “Y-you don’t have to do that. If you want, I can give you a can of pepper spray. I have a couple more of them at home.”

A chuckle escapes my lips, and Winter seems to loosen up at this. “I might have to take you up on that offer,” I say, half-jokingly. A wave of shame washes over me as I suddenly felt bad for being jealous of her. Maybe the events of this morning still have their effects on me or maybe I ate something bad earlier, but something feels off with me today and I’m not sure why.

“Guys, look over here!” Yujin shouts excitedly from the front of the group, pointing at a giant Spider-man plush sitting on a prize table for a basketball game. Two basketball hoops stood tall before him, much higher than a regular basketball hoop. “I HAVE to get this for my room!” He quickly pays the game attendant, who places three basketballs on the counter in front of him.

“Alright, the game is simple. All you have to do is make at least one basket and you get a prize,” the worker explains. Yujin takes the first ball and psyches himself up, giving the ball a couple dribbles before throwing it… And completely missing the hoop.

“Aw man,” he groans in disappointment. “Yuno, why don’t you try?”

Yuno accepts the challenge, gripping the second ball with steely determination. I watch with bated breath as the ball leaves his hands. It soars high into the sky… and completely misses the hoop. The ball shoots way over the hoop and ends up knocking a corndog out of someone’s hand. The girls and I struggle to stifle our laughter as Yuno’s cheeks turn a bright red.

“A-ah… Shit…” He curses under his breath. “M-maybe Winter should try…”

Winter steps forward, her hands shaking as she grips the final ball. We all freeze with anticipation as she shoots the ball towards the hoop. Miraculously, it arcs perfectly in the air and lands through the hoop with a satisfying swoosh. A scattered array of claps and cheers erupt from some bystanders that witnessed that moment, but none are as ecstatic as Yujin, who jumps and cheers with the excitement of a kid on his birthday.

“Congratulations, ma’am! Which prize would you like?” The worker asks her.

“T-the Spiderman p-please,” Winter stammers, accepting the toy and handing it to Yujin.

“Ahhh!!! Winter, you’re the best!!!” He screams, drawing a variety of reactions from passersby. Yuno flashes her a quick thumbs up while Hyein, Haerin, and Hanni shower her with compliments, which Winter modestly tries to brush away with a bashful smile. Meanwhile, Danielle is occupied with trying to contain Yujin’s overflowing energy.

“M-my dad really likes basketball, so he made me play w-when I was younger. I-it’s nothing really,” Winter explains. She’s kind, pretty, AND athletic? It’s almost as if God himself created the perfect person and placed them in front of me on a day I decided not to dress up. There’s no wonder I felt jealous of her. But why am I jealous of her?

“Are you okay?” Yuno asks me.

I startle slightly at his sudden appearance. “H-huh? Yeah, why?” I awkwardly chuckle. Yuno’s gentle gaze meets mine with genuine concern, momentarily distracting myself from my swirling thoughts. I found myself wanting to draw closer and get lost in his irises.

What?! Minji, what are you even thinking?! Have you gone insane?!

“You look… upset,” he admits shyly. “I just wanted t-”

Suddenly, a basketball bounces off of the other hoop and hurtles towards Winter. In a flash, Yuno turns and catches the ball right before it hits her in the face, his gentle expression replaced with a stern glare at the person who threw the ball.

“Watch it,” he growls in a calm yet menacing tone as he tosses the ball back. His face immediately softens as he turns back to Winter. “You alright?”

“Y-yeah. Thanks, Yuno,” she answers with an appreciative smile. I felt my heart drop from my chest as I watched their interaction, confusion and envy creating a storm in my mind.

“Sooooooo, you gonna make a move or no?” I jump as Hanni startles me from behind.

“W-what??” I sputter.

“I recognize that face anywhere. You’re jealous~.”

Heat creeps up my face as I struggle to find the words to explain myself. “Wha- I am not jealous!” I seethe, trying to keep my voice down. “I’m just… impressed by his reaction timing.”

“Mhm,” she hums, raising an eyebrow. “Well, I’m impressed by how close they look. Don’t you think they would make a cute couple, Minj?”

Her words leave a bitter taste in my mouth. “Y-yeah, I’m sure they would,” I reply, unconvincingly. “W-whatever, like I said I’m not jealous.”

“Oh sweet, sweet Minji,” Hanni sighs, shaking her head as she pats my shoulder. She follows the rest of the group as they move on, leaving me to watch Yuno and Winter as they walk side by side. No matter how hard I try, I can't rationalize this weird feeling in the pit of my stomach every time I see them together. I need to do something, but I don’t know why.

______________________________________________________________

We spent the next hour walking around, playing all the fair games, and filing our stomachs with an array of different snacks the fair offers. I tried to enjoy myself, but the pit in my stomach continued to grow and grow until it became unbearable. I even started to consider Hanni’s words, but no amount of inner turmoil would make me go that insane.

As the sun dipped low, casting an enchanting orange hue over the fairgrounds, it seemed like the perfect time to watch the sunset from atop the ferris wheel. As excited as I am to be able to watch the sunset, I still couldn’t get rid of this weird feeling as I watched Yuno chat with Winter and Yujin at the front of the group. Hanni seemed to notice this too.

“Girl, you look miserable,” she remarks, resting her chin on my shoulder with a sympathetic pout. “You’re supposed to be having fun.”

“I-I am having fun. This is my ‘having fun’ face.” I flash her a forced grin in a feeble attempt to mask my true feelings. Hanni sighs heavily right as we reach the front of the line.

“Each cabin only fits two people, so you’ll have to split into groups of two,” the ride operator explains. Naturally, Hyein and Haerin pair up together, waving excitedly at us as they eagerly step into the first cabin.

“Yuno, do you wanna ride together?” Yujin asks him. Before he could answer, however, Hanni takes matters into her own hands and pushes Danielle into Yujin.

“Hey Yujin, did you know Danielle is really scared of heights? She needs a big strong man protecting her while she’s up there.” Danielle silently curses at her with her eyes as Hanni pushes the duo into the next cabin. My eyes go wide with panic as I suddenly catch onto her plan.

“Winter, I love your dress! Let’s chat about it on the ferris wheel!” Hanni exclaims as she grabs Winter’s hand, pulling her towards the open doors of the cabin. Right before the doors close behind them, I catch a glimpse of Hanni flashing me a thumbs up. My heart threatened to explode from my chest as I found myself left alone with Yuno.

“S-soooooo… U-um, do you wanna, um, I-I gues-”

“Let’s go,” Yuno utters as walks ahead of me into the cabin. I mentally facepalm, cringing at my sudden inability to formulate a coherent sentence. I step into the cabin and sit across from Yuno. As the doors seal shut, the space suddenly felt a lot smaller and more intimate. I gaze out at the orange glow of the sun to distract myself, both mortified and oddly blissful.

______________________________________________________________

Yuno’s POV

My heart kept chugging like a speeding steam train, I worried that Minji could hear it echo off the walls of the cabin. Throughout the day, I could feel her gaze lingering on me and I don’t know why. Did she wanna talk about yesterday? Was something on her mind? Was there something in my hair? Did I smell? I would’ve showered before I left the house if I knew I was gonna bump into her.

A strange feeling fills my chest as I observe the way the sunlight reflects off of her skin. The same feeling that had been haunting me for the past couple of days. Minji constantly invades my thoughts, stirring emotions I couldn’t comprehend. Everything about her felt new and strange, but I couldn’t deny that being around her made me feel happy. I drop my gaze to the floor as she turns to me, hoping she didn’t catch me staring.

“Sooo…” She began, filling the silence. “Winter seems nice.”

I tilt my head in confusion at her sudden interest in Winter. “Uh, yeah. I guess so.”

“How’d you two meet?” She asks with an odd amount of intrigue

For the most part, Minji is an open book. I never have to guess what she’s thinking or feeling, and unlike her parents, she never seems to be hiding some ulterior motive beneath a gentle exterior - until now. At first, I thought maybe my eyes were playing tricks on me, but being the open book she is, it became clear as day that Minji was hiding something. But why? Maybe it wasn’t my place to pry, but my instincts told me otherwise.

“We have english together, but we didn’t start being… ‘friends’ until a couple days ago. She and Yujin kinda just… inserted themselves into my life. And now we’re here,” I explain. Minji’s brow furrows in response.

“Wait, you only started talking a couple days ago? I thought you two were dating.” She hurriedly clasps her hand over her mouth as if she didn’t mean to let that out. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to-”

“We’re not dating,” I say a little too quickly. “Just friends.”

The cabin falls silent as both of our cheeks turn a light crimson. Minji turns back to the window, and my eyes gravitate towards her face once again as if that’s where they’re meant to be. The light and the shadows dance on her skin creating a work of art right in front of me. She’s beautiful in the most impossible way, defying everything I know about the world just by existing. My heart pumps faster and faster as my mind begins to run wild, imagining the two of us together as more than friends. Going on dates and being close. Just like this. Maybe Minji wanted to know if Winter and I were dating because she’s interested in me. I quickly shot that idea down. Those kinds of thoughts only lead down a bad road.

“My parents used to take my brother and I to the fair when we were younger,” Minji says, snapping me out of my daze. “We would go around and play all the games, trying to win the prizes. The games were always rigged, so we never won any. One time, I got so upset that I couldn’t win a bear toy that I started crying. My dad ended up paying extra just so he could get me the bear.” A gentle smile graces her face as she recounts her memory.

“We would always ride the ferris wheel at the end so we could watch the sunset from the top of the ferris wheel, just like this. I was always too short, so my dad had to hoist me up so I could see through the window.” She chuckles lightly before her smile eventually fades from her lips and her gaze falls to the floor. “Sorry, being here must have made me nostalgic. It’s been awhile since I got to watch the sunset from a ferris wheel.”

“Don’t be sorry. I like hearing you talk.” My eyes grow wide with panic as I realize the implication of my words. “I-I meant I like you. I MEAN YOUR STORY!! I liked your story…” My face falls into my palms in an attempt to hide the deepening blush, and I let out a muffled “Fuck” under my breath. I can hear Minji trying to stifle her laughter, which only makes me feel worse. I wanted nothing more than to bury myself six feet under and stay there for eternity.

“I know what you mea- AHHH!!!”

I jolt my head up right as Minji jumps from her seat and into my lap. Bewilderment, accompanied by a million other emotions, runs through my mind as she wraps her arms around my head and hides her face in the crook of my neck.

“M-Minji, uhh w-what are you-”

“There’s a spider on the seat!” She exclaims, her voice tingling with fear. I maneuver my head around her and see the tiniest spider I’ve ever seen scurrying around the spot where Minji once sat. “Ahhh, I really hate spiders!!”

I try to pry her body off of me, but her grip is tighter than an anaconda. A wave of deja vu washes over me as I suddenly start to feel lightheaded.

“M-Minji… Y-you’re choking m-me…” Right before I feel like I’m about to blackout, Minji releases her grip on my neck and slides off of my lap into the space next to me. The seat is a little cramped, but it’s better than dying in such an embarrassing way.

“I-I’M SO SORRY, YUNO!!” She apologizes, her face a bright tomato red. She flinches as the spider continues to move around on the opposite seat, wincing with each movement. “I-I really, really, really, REALLY hate spiders.”

Even after she almost choked me to death, I couldn’t help but find her cute as she shields her eyes with delicate hands, her face nestled into my shoulder. A grin threatens to grow on my lips as I try to comfort her with a few gentle pats on the head.

“I used to be afraid of spiders when I was a kid,” I began in a calming tone. “Whenever I saw one, I always cried to my parents about it. One day, I found one in the bathroom, so I ran to my mom sobbing and told her to kill it. Instead of killing it, she held me in her arms and carried me to the bathroom where it was. I was just like you, hiding my face on her shoulder because I was too scared to even look at it. In a gentle voice, she told me about how it was alone and probably looking for its family. If I killed it, then its family would be sad. She told me that she would be sad if I was suddenly killed when I was out all alone. From that day on, I was never afraid of spiders. Every time I saw one, I would carry it outside so it could find its family.”

I chuckle under my breath. “I don’t think it actually works like that, but I don’t kill spiders because of her. Because of my mom.”

As I finish my story, I notice Minji’s eyes watering and her lip quivering as if she’s about to cry. “Ah shit, are you okay?” I ask with great concern.

“S-Sorry, that was just… really sweet,” she sniffles. I bit my lip, trying to suppress my smile as I simultaneously fought the urge to wipe her tears away. As she calms down, we sit together in silence, watching the tiny spider walk around the cabin.

“He’s just a little guy,” Minji utters, a cute grin on her face. “I wonder why I was so scared of you before.”

Just then, my phone buzzes in my pocket. I open up the notification to see a selfie of Yujin and Danielle with the giant Spiderman plush wedged in between them. Despite Danielle’s awful personality, Yujin seems to like her, so I guess it’s alright. If I didn’t know any better, I could’ve easily mistaken them for siblings.

“Aww, that’s cute. We should send one back,” Minji suggests, her eyes lighting up.

“O-oh, uh, sure. How do I…” After a minute of hopelessly fumbling through the labyrinth of options on the screen, Minji gently takes the phone from me and opens up the camera with a simple tap.

“Do you know how to use a phone, Yuno?” She teases.

“U-uh, no…” I answer, scratching the back of my head in embarrassment. Her eyes widened with surprise at my response. “It’s my first phone, and I just got it today so I haven’t really had a chance to properly look through it.”

“O-okay, well just press on this gray square over here if you wanna open up the camera,” she explains in a kind tone, free of any judgment. She raises her arm and I can see the two of us reflected onto the screen. “Scoot a little closer so we can both be in the frame.”

With a gulp, I scoot closer to her in the already cramped space. The flowery scent of her hair wafts through my nostrils, gentle and clean. Hypnotized by the scent, I don’t realize I’m staring at her until she nudges me with her elbow.

“Look at the camera,” she reminds me, a knowing smile playing on her lips. The phone camera manages to catch the redness of my cheeks as I glance back at my reflection. Minji snaps a few shots before reviewing her work.

“They came out pretty well, don’t you think?” She inquires, and I can only nod in agreement, despite my less-than-stellar appearance in the photos. Minji, on the other hand, looks as pretty as ever. Even when she’s not doing much, the camera seems to pick up on all her good sides. She fiddles with my phone for a little bit before handing it back to me.

“Here, I put my number in so you can send me the photos,” she says. “I hope you don’t mind.”

“N-not at all,” I stutter excitedly, my heart soaring in the air. Minji giggles at my elation and we share a laugh in that cramped ferris wheel cabin. In that moment, as the sunset bathes us in its warm glow, everything falls into place. The weird feelings, the incessant thoughts - they all lead to one undeniable truth. I’m in love with Minji Kim.

______________________________________________________________

As I step out of the cabin, I see the rest of our friends waiting for us at the front of the ferris wheel. Instinctively, I reach my hand out towards Minji as she carefully steps out, which she accepts with a small grin adorning her lips. Though the contact is brief, the memory of her delicate hand in mine etches itself into my memory.

“Soooooo, did you two have fun?” Hanni asks us with an unnerving smirk that could only mean trouble. Before I get a chance to answer however, Minji grabs her wrist and leads her away.

“I-I’m going to the bathroom, Hanni you’re coming with me!” Her voice echoes as she drags Hanni away, trailed by the rest of her friends like ducklings following their mother. Perplexed, Winter, Yujin, and I settle onto a nearby bench to rest in the shade.

“The ferris wheel was fun, I took a lot of pictures of the sunset!” Yujin shares, displaying the photos on his phone. Almost his entire gallery was full of sun from slightly varying angles, along with a few selfies with Danielle. Her gentler side she exclusively shows to Yujin is such a stark contrast from her usual coldness, it’s almost unsettling.

“I feel exhausted.” Winter slumps beside me, her head tilting to the side as if she was too tired to even hold it up. “Hanni is really nice, but I felt so drained after talking to her for five minutes. I don’t know where she gets all that energy from.” I quietly snicker to myself. That seems on brand for Hanni.

My mind wanders back to the epiphany I had earlier. “Um, can I ask you two something… odd?” Their heads perk up, looking at me expectantly. “Have you guys ever… ‘dated’ anyone before?”

“I’ve had crushes before, but I was always too scared to confess,” Yujin admits.

“What about you, Winter? Have you ever had a boyfriend?” I ask.

“Um, not exactly…” With a hint of reluctance, she retrieves her phone from her purse, revealing a polaroid tucked in her phone case - a snapshot of Winter with her arms wrapped around a girl with striking eyes and jet black hair.

Both of our jaws drop, simultaneously shocked and impressed.

“Oh shit…” I mutter before coming to my senses. She’s pretty, but not Minji pretty.

“Wow, that’s your girlfriend, Winter?!” Yujin exclaims. Winter smiles shyly as she puts her phone back in her purse.

“Y-yeah. She’s studying in Japan right now, so I don't get to see her often. I hope she visits soon; I think you guys would get along with her really well.” The look on her face as she thinks of her girlfriend reminds me of my mother’s face in old wedding photos. I don’t understand anything about love or relationships, but that face told me everything I needed to know. “Why did you want to know, Yuno?”

My cheeks suddenly turn warm. “Oh, uh… No reason.”

As if on cue, Minji and the rest of her friends return from the restroom, with Minji looking noticeably flustered and Hanni more excited than ever.

“It’s getting dark, so we were planning on heading back,” Danielle says. “Do you guys need a ride home?”

“O-oh, it’s okay, w-we were gonna take the subway home,” Winter replies.

“WAIT!” Yujin shouts suddenly before turning to her. “Winter, can we ride with them? Pleaseeeeee?” He grabs her sleeve and looks up at her with pleading eyes.

“I-I guess if it’s okay with them.” “WOOHOO!” Yujin cheers. “I call shotgun!” He dashes toward the parking lot, his Spiderman plush bobbing in his arms.

“Hey, that’s my seat!” Hanni exclaims, running after him. In the midst of commotion, I sneak over to Minji.

“H-hi,” I stutter, brimming with nervous excitement.

“H-hey.” Even with the sun completely set, her smile manages to illuminate everything around us. Maybe it’s just my imagination, but the air felt different compared to the times we’ve talked before. That strange yet euphoric feeling still lingers in my chest, this time I finally know what that feeling is - I think. Maybe it’s love, maybe it’s the fumes of fried food decaying my brain. The only thing I know for sure is that I like being around Minji.

“Are you two going to come with us or no?” Hyein calls out to us while Haerin glares suspiciously in our direction. Flustered, we walk side by side towards the parking lot, following distantly behind the rest of the group. The scattered murmurs of the crowd begin to fade behind us, the chirping of crickets and the subtle crunching of rocks underneath our feet taking their place. An ombre of growing indigo looks down at us from a cloudless sky, dotted with specks of starlight thousands of lightyears away. Despite their distance, they shine brightly against the night sky, almost as bright as the girl walking next to me.

“Yuno,” Minji voice breaks through my daydreams, pulling me back to the present. “You’re staring.”

“Ah… Sorry…” I turn my head away to hide the heat creeping up my face, prompting a soft giggle from her.

“You know, you’re not what I expected at all.”

Curious, I turn my gaze back towards her. “What do you mean?”

Her eyebrows furrow as she thinks about her response, and I bite my lower lip to stifle my smile at her cute expression. “Ever since sophomore year, I’ve always heard whispers about this scary guy that goes around fighting people. I never believed it because I thought it was too cliche to be true,” she begins, shooting me a playful glance I scratch the back of my head, suddenly feeling sheepish.

“That is, until two years later, when I come face to face with the ‘scary guy’, all bloody and bruised from a fight that happened two seconds ago. When I first met you, I thought you were some jerk who liked hurting others for the fun of it. I was wrong and I’m sorry.” Minji looks up at me, eyes full of remorse. I’ve seen others use this look on the people I’ve hurt, but never on me. To be on the receiving end of it felt disconcerting.

“You don’t have to apolog-”

“You’re kind and caring and you never hesitate to stand up for what’s right even when no one else will. While I don’t agree with your methods, I think the reason why you fight is very admirable, and if people just stopped being scared of you for two seconds, they could see how cute of a person you are.” Her hand shoots up to her mouth while her eyes go wide with panic.

Did I hear her right? Did she just call me… cute??

“I MEANT GOOD!!” She exclaims, correcting herself. “I meant to say you’re a good person…” We stand there, turned away from each other, too embarrassed to fill the growing silence. The chorus of crickets is quickly drowned out by my heartbeat echoing in my ears. My entire body feels both uncomfortably warm and freezing cold at the same time. The sudden honk of a car horn makes us both jump.

“What are you two still doing? Let’s go!” I turn to see Hanni yell at us from the back seat of an SUV. It seems that Yujin got to the front seat first. Minji and I both trudge towards the car, too embarrassed to even look at each other. Hanni steps out of the car and reclines the seat forward to let us get into the back, where Winter is sitting alone with two empty seats on either side of her.

As we settle in the back seat, I immediately shut my eyes, hoping that falling asleep would make things better. One final thing stays in my mind as I slip into unconsciousness.

She thinks I’m cute.

______________________________________________________________

A gentle shake rouses me from my slumber.

“Yuno, we’re here,” I hear Winter say as my eyes slowly open, finding my bearings. Outside the window, I see the convenience store where Winter works at.

“Winter said you guys live around here, so I hope you don’t mind,” Danielle explains from the front seat. Minji and Hanni step out of the car, allowing for Winter and I to exit.

“See you guys around,” Hanni says, waving goodbye. My eyes meet Minji’s momentarily before we swiftly break away. Not even a second of eye contact and I can already feel my body temperature rising.

“Thanks for the ride! Byeeeeee!” Yujin exclaims as the car disappears down the street. The three of us say our goodbyes to each other before we go our separate ways.

A flurry of emotions fills my stomach as I look back on the oddly eventful day. What started as an excuse to get out of the house turned into my first time at the fair, with Minji no less. I couldn’t help but feel like I’m in some surreal dream and that I’ll wake up one day to find out that none of this ever happened. As odd as all of this feels, I have to admit that I did enjoy it. The ferris wheel especially was… fun.

As I enter my house, I see my dad sitting on the couch, watching some sitcom on the TV. Right. I completely forgot he’s “different” now.

“Hey, Yuno,” he greets, a bright smile on his face. It’s the first time in a while that I’ve seen his smile. “Did you eat? There’s leftover pizza in the fridge if you’re hungry. I tried to cook dinner, but it didn’t turn out right.” A hearty chuckle leaves his lips, a sound that I vaguely remember hearing years ago.

“I’m good. Thanks,” I say as I head towards the stairs. As my foot lands on the first step, a sudden impulse arises within me. “Uh, dad?”

“Hm?” His eyebrows perk up as he looks at me expectantly. I had no idea what I was planning on saying to him. Should I tell him about my day? Should I apologize? Should I tell him about my… “crush”? Is that what that is?

“Uh… Nevermind.” I hurry up the stairs, deciding against saying anything. My head was already filled to the brim with confusing emotions, I didn’t need to add more to the pile. I collapse onto my bed, staring up at the ceiling, the events of today playing in my mind like a broken record. I pull my phone out, fidgeting with the shiny piece of metal in my hand. Minji put her number in my phone. I can talk to her whenever I wanted to. And I do want to. My thumbs freeze right above the keyboard as I figure out what to say to her.

Maybe I should keep it simple with “Hey”. No, that’s too boring. How about “How are you feeling?” What am I, her doctor? Uhhh, maybe “I had fun today.” That’s stupid. Come on, think, Yuno, think. Fuck, I’m shit at this.

Is this what having a crush feels like? This sucks.

______________________________________________________________

Minji’s POV

“AGHHHHHHHHH!!!!” I scream into my pillow, hoping I don’t accidentally alert my parents to my “Teenage Angst”.

Minji!!! Why did you call him cute!? I mean, you’re not wrong, the way he got all embarrassed after missing the basketball hoop was kinda cut- WHAT!? WHAT ARE YOU EVEN THINKING RIGHT NOW!? ARGHHHHHH!!!

I hold onto my bear toy for comfort as I wrestle with the conflicting emotions in my head. Maybe this is just a result of all the stress from prom preparation clouding my judgement and sending me into a whirlwind of confusion. A day that was supposed to be full of leisure and enjoyment was instead full of jealousy and confusion. It wasn’t entirely bad though; riding the ferris wheel with Yuno was… nice. I feel my heart flutter in my chest as I recall that memory. Surely, Hanni’s teasing couldn’t be right… could it? Am I… in love with Yuno Lin?

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