#I’ll talk more when I post about it
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So I was planning on drawing this kumidark swap thing that I first made up months ago, where basically Dark Choco is the kumiho and Kumiho is the warrior (@sweet sure I told you about this before, didn’t I?). Anyways, I was thinking about it again and feel like drawing it, just haven’t yet, not sure if I’ll get much done here
Anyways, so one thing I was just thinking about is the size difference, like how Dark Choco is big while Kumiho is small. Do I keep their original sizes or do I swap that too? Because we could have short Dark Choco, or we could have tiny warrior Kumiho being a badass. Also she’d have a giant fox pillow
(Okay to be honest, I think I’m sticking with the original sizes. I just wanted to talk about it before I post art, since I don’t know when that’ll be. Also I do have other actual things I’m not sure of that I could probably ask about, but eh)
#also they have different names since they don’t entirely line up#Dark Choco is Dark Kumiho#and Kumiho is Marshmallow Fluff#since she’s a marshmallow fox#I’ll talk more when I post about it#cookie run#cookie run kingdom#cookie run ovenbreak#dark choco cookie#kumiho cookie#kumidark#cookie run au#kumidark swap au
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let trans men&mascs romanticize testosterone.
keep your “you’re not going to look like an anime boy or whatever, you’re just going to look like your dad” to yourself.
keep your “but what about the balding and the acne and the anger problems and the gross hair everywhere and the horrible painful bottom growth and and and” to yourself.
keep your “once you look like a man you will scare people and you can never stop thinking about that” to yourself.
keep your “testosterone is poison and don’t you dare even suggest that saying that might hurt you” to yourself.
we are not obligated to take on your fears and traumas around testosterone as our own, nor are we obligated to let them influence our relationship with it.
we are not obligated to sit here in a world that heavily restricts and constantly threatens our access to it and listen silently as you contribute to stigma around it.
we’re already tired of watching cis society as a whole try to rip it away from us; we don’t need fellow trans people and supposed allies giving credence to their cause.
for many of us testosterone is life-saving medicine, it’s liquid gold, it’s the nectar and ambrosia of the fucking gods.
is it so hard to just let us have that? to let us believe that and say it and celebrate it without being given a million reasons to question it? is that really too much to ask?
if you can find it in your heart to let other trans people romanticize their transitions, i promise you can let us do it to.
testosterone is a beautiful thing. it makes people hotter and even more importantly it makes them happier and anyone who wants it should be able to have it because it’s so life-changing and magical and wonderful and incredibly important to so many people who deserve the happiness it offers.
#got some screenshots from a post talking about the whole ‘testosterone is poison’ thing#and it just 100% confirmed to me that it’s so much more than the ‘just venting’ people try to play it off as#and im just thinking a lot about how all these things are tied together now#how so many people including people in our own community are committed to making us feel bad about wanting/needing t#i’ll probably post those screenshots at some point but for now here’s this#posts about t always seem to get people Passionate so uh. wish me luck#love when the stuff i need to live a happy life is also like. one of the most controversial and hated substances ever apparently#transandrophobia#transandromisia#transmisandry#virilmisia#virilphobia#anti transmasculinity#trans men#transmascs
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Hey. Sorry about the inactivity, but pretty sure no one cared that much anyways lol. Been a looooong time since I kept that distant from Tumblr…at least now I know I’m able to survive without checking posts every day/being chronically online! I’ve got an intense love-hate relationship with this lifestyle I’ve dug myself into. Think I’m getting a little bit better with the balance even if school isn’t really giving me an option. Got a load of work I need to keep catching up on if I don’t want to disappoint my professors. We’ll survive somehow. Here take a quick batch of Puzzle doodles k bye
#the hell am I so anxious about? maybe it’s just overstimulation stuff#hoping it’ll die down because I can’t keep enjoying myself when I’m like this#seriously is starting to mess with my flight responses over the tiniest things#like yea obviously I needed to stay logged out of Tumblr so I would focus more on schoolwork#but uhhhh gonna be transparent and say a huge part of it is the jolts of anxiety :(#like even the thought of logging back here has caused me to feel like sweating#my brain kept saying ‘no I don’t want to I can’t do that’ even when I felt bad for missing out on others posts#like I want to be here so I can support my mutuals dammit!!!#I’m a mess. I’m such a broken mess oh great lovely spectacular#maybe the culminating stress of final exam deadlines is worsening stuff as well#I can’t tell you why I’m like this I just am 🙃#anyways thinking I’ll start adapting to the distance. Sorry but being a shut-in is more appealing right now#I just need time to be with myself and not be so invested in the lives of others#anyways what’s something mildly positive I can wrap this up with so I don’t seem pathetic….#ah yes the final Puzzle sketch here was drawn today before a class period#one of my fellow classmates noticed and audibly asked me ‘is that Mr. Puzzles?’#IT TOOK EVERTHING IN MY WILLPOWER TO NOT LET OUT A GIDDY SHRIEK#Felt like my eyes bulged and I jolted in enthusiasm jskjsksp spontaneous happiness?? actally experiencing the feeling of fitting in??#anyways I responded with a very normal ‘WAIT YOU KNOW ABOUT HIM???’ while trying to suppress grinning or going ‘teehee’#anyways now it’s my personal mission to keep initiating conversations with her because AUUUUUGH SHE KNOWS WHO HE IS I’M LOSING IT#proceeded to talk about Murder Drones & TADC like holy SHIT I didn’t think I would ever find animation peeps in my psychology class auuu 😭💜#it’s a MIRACLE man this may be a sign that college won’t be isolating anymore yaaaaayyy#PUZZLE IS SINGLE HANDILY HELPING ME TALK TO PEOPLE BOTH ONLINE AND IRL THIS IS WILD#all hail the best comfort character seriously holy shit—like imagine she never noticed me drawing Puzzles!! I’D STILL BE LONELY AS HELL#okay sorry I’ll stop typing like a teenager and go back to pretending to be well-versed in speech & conducting myself ‘normally’ :3#doodles#sketches#not tagging with Puzzles because hahaaaaa don’t look at me
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Feeling disconnected again…
#im trying not to isolate myself but I been finding myself pulling away from folks again#maybe I’m just tired but idk#like I been feeling fine and drawing helps as an outlet#but when I go a day without drawing I end up feeling terrible#and I been noticing I haven’t been engaging a lot lately either which I’m mad about#like I’ll scroll a bit maybe post art and asks and then disappear#but also I been feeling like I’m gonna embarrass myself around people again#so if y’all have noticed me interacting less in servers or not as talkative in dms that’s why#vent#I guess???#I mean it’s more of just me noticing this lately and wanted to let y’all know that I just been feeling off lately#ventish#💬 chy chatter 💬
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I don’t think you all realize how many times I’ve had to hold myself back from going on a long rant about the age gap N and Hilbert allegedly have according to Bulbapedia (just so you all know, I stand on the freak side of things, I genuinely would still ship them if the Pokemon company swore they were 14 and 20). It’s just narratively this is nonsense and does not fit and Word Of God means nothing when compared to source material so 16 and 18 makes way more sense. But again…not worth rambling about. One thing I will say is while I can kind of buy N as 20 (21 would make more sense as the next age milestone after 18 he might have been coronated at, but I guess 20 is from when you’re an adult in Japan?) it’s honestly Hilbert as 14 that grinds my gears more. Like why does Bulbapedia say he’s 14 and then within the trivia section of that very page, mention that interviews say he and Hilda were designed as 16. Like at least list 14-16 as the age range??? Like bruh, why is it not a range????? 16 is clearly one of the correct interpretation of his age. Constantly perplexed by this.
The damage Bulbapedia has done cause fools won’t play the source material and come to their own conclusions….
Like I guess if one wishes to assume Hilbert is younger than the game implies and N is older than the game implies have at it. You do you. But it’s such a bizarre shift to see in how the ship is viewed.
#Grinds my gears#again would still ship it no matter what but I have Feelings about word of god trumping source material#dare I tag this….#N#touya#pokemon#IsshuShipping#I’ve said my piece I’ve seen multiple people make arguments but I’ll still stand with my canceled ship#send an ask about it to the side blog if you want to see me go off the rails tho#I’ve thought about reasoning behind their ages too much#Syd rambles#I feel this needs the added context that I was drunk when I wrote this#went into a tizzy as a result of twitter pissing me off with age discourse#also this post is slowly turning into me putting on my clown makeup since over on the side blog I’m pondering embracing the “canon” age gap#since all of this is still 1000% true to me but spite is fueling me so I’m like fine for every person who trash talks the ship#even if they’re pro Isshu when they’re closer in age I still get annoyed at the trash talking (it’s that that annoys me more tbh)#people that are pro the ship but only when you do it “the right way”#so sure maybe I will use the foolish age gap#bizarre implications of what that means for Cheren having a full time job at 16 and all (that’s the other piece what it does to BW2 ages)#so to anyone liking this post realize I do play both sides of liking the ship cause I Do Not Care about the maybe/maybe not wider age gap
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suddenly thought about how reno, similar to mina when she first enlisted - was thrown into a situation where they were known to be gifted/talented and had to put their lives at risk right off the bat.
except. mina clearly and obviously looks out for reno and places him in the division with a captain whom she KNOWS will nurture and look after him well. because mina herself understands what it’s like to be thrown into the battlefield with one big weapon for the first time…
and she doesn’t want reno to go through the same fear she did… it also helps that unlike mina who was alone, iharu was with him 🥲
mina you are SO SO SO KIND!!!!!!!!! giving reno the support that she never got…
#egg boils#mina my beloved#i wanted to pull more pages but i don’t have any reno ones saved LOL MY BAD#maybe i’ll update this post later but i just wanted to talk about how mina is such a good captain#she’ll change the jakdf from her division ..will make sure no teenager will have to go through the same struggles she did.. with no support#which is why when i see narumi and kikoru i get so :)#ugh . my two strongest captains… a title befitting of both of them#ashiro mina#mina#kaiju no.8
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MOB MAVERICK⁉️⁉️
YIPPEEE FINALLY FINISHED SMT!! Ok so I finally decided to draw Mob Maverick!!! My beloved!! I have a lot and I mean A LOT of thoughts with him and loreee… But I’ll probably spread it out through posts over time. I should probably give some basic info on him…
So Maverick Mic is a part of the Darling family! The day he joined was the lowest point in his life and you’ll find out eventually why! Just know Maverick was but a husk of a man he once were when he joined Wally.
I like to think that he was mostly sent on solo missions to take care of unwanted rivals or those who got in the way. Just to make life easier for the family! But since he’s pretty isolated while working alone (he mostly operated from an abandoned radio station) and doesn’t have anyone close in the family he’s just kinda… slowly going insane… Until he got assigned to bodyguard Rainy! (Who belongs to @koifsssh ! Muah!) And ever since then things got a bit more interesting!… Which honestly is an understatement. Koi made a post about their relationship, and I might make one as well!! To put into words Maverick’s perspective on things.
Honestly Mob Maverick is the complete opposite of original Maverick. He keeps a lot to himself, not as outgoing, a pretty grumpy and tired guy (he gets zero sleep 💀) and overall a lot more quieter. It’s just he’s been with himself for such a long while that talking kinda doesn’t seem appealing anymore. And not only that his mindset at first is very pessimistic. He does what he’s told and moves on with his life. The guy died a hundred times so making connections lost its point… Until Rainy appeared :DDD now getting to know someone better gained its appeal back…
I also have some doodles! OH ALSO MADDY’S IN THIS AU TOO!! Couldn’t forget my babyyyyy! Honestly she deserves her own post! But I’ll say at least smt about her, here’s a fun fact: she’s the only reason Wally even considered taking Maverick into the family. Bless
Also cannot get Rainy and Maddy shopping for goods out of my head istg
AH and the mob au belongs to @/clownsuu !
#GAAWHHHWVEVBFBNF SHE IS SO SILLY#YOU GUYS 😭😭😭😭😭😭#I know I barely talk on here but lemme tell you something I am OBSESSED#YOU HEAR ME???#OBSESSED WITH THEM#WITH RAINY WITH MAVERICK WITH MADDY#I AM NOT NORMAL#hopefully I’ll make more posts and won’t get cold feet whenever I want to talk about mh characters!#cause yeah that tends to happen…#i need to kill the oart of me that cringes when I try to do smt I like it’s starting to get annoying#maverick mic#maddy moon#rainy dewdrop#mob!maverick#mob!maddy#welcome home#welcome home mob au#welcome home au#welcome home puppet show#welcome home arg#welcome home oc#my art
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It always makes me so happy when an artist I recognize likes my art… like woah, I like your art and you also like mine??? No way
#sfw#not art#was gonna post on my regular blog instead but it feels more fitting here#also I’ve found new artists just by looking at who likes my stuff#cuz sometimes I like to just#sneak over to the blog of someone that liked or reblogged something of mine#or recently followed me#cuz I’m chismosa like that#and sometimes it’s an artist and I’m like wow…. same…#sorry this post is just me talking again instead of art but I get a lot of thoughts when I’m about to sleep and I need to share some#I hope to draw more traditional sketches again it’s so much fun#maybe more Kallamar too he was also fun to draw#or maybe I’ll finally work on my dogrinder ay bishop designs… so many ideas
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Sorry (not) but I find anyone who acts like Blue is making something out of nothing when she’s mad Adam’s first question is about the kissing to be like. Deeply suspicious. Of course she is mad that’s the first thing he asked her! They’ve been walking on eggshells around each other and not really communicating since the last aborted kiss attempt which is on both of them to some degree, but when he comes around to her it’s only for this and when she has so many fears and insecurities about not properly belonging in the gang because she’s a girl (which is founded based on the fact aside from Noah they’ve all been misogynistic towards her at some point even if it was passive) and not being respected, when she’s also an outsider at home because of a different thing she can’t control. And you can not say that her feeling Adam is treating her like a thing to have and not a person he connects with is unfounded he again literally “I got Blue without you!” screamed at Gansey, consistently going to her after they fight (he did it end of TRB after repugnant too) to validate himself or just generally when he’s falling apart looking for validation from her like in the apartment scene. It’s not a bad thing to seek validation from your partner and in TRB before I’d say the last quarter I think Blue and Adam were genuinely connecting and developing a friendship while also exploring their feelings/attractions to each other, which did always have elements of seeking escape or validation for both of them in different ways, but it’s dissolved into that so much now. And I do think Blue is to some degree mad at Adam because he’s here and available to be mad at when she’s also mad at Gansey for it (I don’t think they’re *in the wrong * for not inviting her but they are in the wrong for not even considering she could want to go or at least want to be in the loop, also even though it’s Gansey’s party if Adam is trying to be her *boyfriend* it was kind of his place to ask her) so she’s conveying anger at Adam when the anger is for both of them, and also more general factors she’s frustrated by, but also Adam has the exact same response of channeling emotions that aren’t solely about Blue through their fights (and to his credit he is self aware that he does this) so again crucifying Blue for it is whack imo. Also to check myself on shipper-brain for the Adam-Gansey aspect of it, well obviously I read that here as a factor because I’m me, but for arguments sake on the premise Adam has No feelings about Gansey that are anything other than platonic Blue would still have a right to be mad about him prioritizing his platonic male friends over her and treating them with more respect, obviously, because misogyny exists (also these are not two contradictory readings in that I think they’re both factors. Signed an Adam Stan).
#Also the fact we learn here he hasn’t ever been to her room when they’ve been sort of dating for a bit..#like yes Adam has much more going on at all times so you could say it’s only about practicality but. Practicality does Not stop Adam when i#comes to spending time with Gansey and even in a sense Ronan in the same way and she’s right to call that out#and she’s also right he wouldn’t talk to Ronan in this way. just wrong about the reason because he does also want to kiss Ronan#just they have a different dynamic. you could read social class and gender as factors I think for sure#(just in case I get annoying anons for saying that I’m not talking in terms of Adam’s sexuality in that obviously he’s bi and into men and#women. but he does relate to them differently and I think analysis of Bluedam that doesn’t acknowledge that is a bit unserious)#and I don’t think Gansey is better about respecting women than Adam to be clear he’s really not.#but much in the way that Ronan and Gansey both have classist moments but Ronan’s seems to be more .. tolerable is the wrong word. But it#doesn’t manifest in ways that hurt Adam in the same ways it does when it’s Gansey. I think Gansey’s treatment isn’t harmful to Blue the way#Adam’s is. For reasons that are more about Adam and Blue and what relationships and treatment work for them rather than objectively tallyin#who is better or worse in terms of isms#but I would need separate posts to talk about that#s speaks#s rereads the dream thieves#trc reread notes#trc#hmm how do I tag these. I think I’ll just go for char tags and leave everything else#blue sargent#adam parrish#my meta#social class / internalized classism is obviously a big factor for both Adam and Blue and how they see each other and the other boys but#that feels more obvious and less like something anyone would take issue with me saying so I focused on it less although it’s very much ther
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Yippee I finished a wrecker and Crosshair centered fic (that’s TOTALLY not whump and angst)… now I just need to beta read it :)
#tbb#tbb crosshair#tbb wrecker#Tech’s alive in it too#it’s set after canon#I sat as if I know what happens after canon#it talks a bit about Tech being clone x#but it’s not the main thing#its abt 8000 words too 😭#might be more or less after I’m done editing#I’ll make a post when I’m done with it
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*smashes in like the Kool-Aid man*
PENDRAGON SIBLINGS YOU SAY????
I have. So many Feels. About Themst™
The complexity?? The layers?? The angst?? Hello??????
Their relationship is just So Much, because you are right, it's all tangled up in miscommunication and missed opportunities, and so many problems that can be sourced back to Uther "War Crimes" Pendragon, who wouldn't know a healthy relationship if it bit him on the ass.
If Merlin and Arthur are two sides of the same coin, then Arthur and Morgana are edges of the same blade.
Because it's the lonely childhoods, the shared grief, the friendship, the vulnerability, the fondness, the teasing, the envy, the jealousy, the almost romance, the protectiveness, the betrayal, the loss, the hurt, the refusal to let go and the desperate hanging on, and the love, the love, the love.
Indifference is the true opposite of love.
Hate is love that's gone rotten.
��If Merlin and Arthur are two sides of the same coin, then Arthur and Morgana are edges of the same blade.” oh fuck….
OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH FUCK
WAIT HOLD ON WAIT LEMME PIGGYBACK ON THAT BESTIE @0hheytherebigbadwolf (tagging you bc it will be a couple days after you sent this ask)
(Also, for anyone wanting background context on what me and bestie are bouncing off on: voilà)
OK OK SO
we are all familiar with King Uther being the greatest (worst) dad of all time, correct? places such high expectations on his “only son and heir” whilst never officially acknowledging Morgana as his daughter until the very end?
F+ father of the year :)
he is not above sending his children into the dungeon if they disobey him as seen here:
(Jfc he even put Morgana in chains like wtf)
also, he is not above using emotional guilt towards them when he deems it necessary (aka one of the only times he actually acknowledges them as his children)
UTHER (1x02 Valiant) I trust you will make me proud.
UTHER (1x08 The Beginning of the End) I’ve treated you like a daughter. Is this how you repay me?
UTHER (1x12 To Kill the King) You are the daughter I never had.
UTHER (2x08 Sins of the Father) You would believe a sorcerer’s lies over the word of your father?
not to mention that when Arthur or Morgana try to reason with him or argue with him since they are the only ones with the status to do so, he pulls rank
UTHER (1x12 To Kill the King) May I remind you that you are speaking to your King [...] Take care, child, or I’ll have you restrained.
UTHER (2x08 Sins of the Father) I am your king and your father. You will show me some respect!
UTHER (2x06 Beauty and the Beast) We live in dangerous times, I cannot allow you to undermine my authority.
UTHER (3x10 Queen of Hearts) You have caused this to happen, Arthur. My decision is final.
ngl i could include more but i have already spent hours searching for shit (YOUTUBE WILL DIE BY MY HAND THAT STINGY BITC—) but y’all get what i mean: Uther is an abusive fucker and it has messed up the conditions of Arthur and Morgana
now, about the double edged blade…..
as previously established, Uther is a fucking dick and wants his children to obey him but also adore him. with this behavior, the Pendragon siblings react in two ways: with anger & contempt or submission and remorse
way #1
i’m gonna start with Morgana because anger is the easiest to pick out throughout the show. in the first episode of the first season, our introduction to Morgana’s character is her lecturing Uther about executing the man Merlin witnessed upon entering Camelot (such a warm welcome for Emrys, mh?)
MORGANA I just don't think chopping someone's head off is cause for a celebration. That poor mother. UTHER It was simple justice for what he'd done. MORGANA To whom? He practiced some magic, he didn't hurt anyone. UTHER You were not around twenty years ago, you have no idea what it was like. MORGANA How long are you going to keep punishing people for what happened then?
early on, it is easy to pick up on Morgana’s resentment and anger at Uther, who she believes is blinded by his fear of magic and his need for control (which she isn’t wrong about). also, we find that she isn’t one to back off when poking the bear (Uther). she does it constantly in seasons 1 & 2
MORGANA (1x03 Mark of Nimueh) Why would she kneel on a cold stone floor morning after morning when she could make these things happen with a snap of her fingers? Like an idle king!
MORGANA (1x08 The Beginning of the End) How can this child be your enemy? He's just a boy. UTHER He is a Druid. MORGANA Is that such a crime?…What have these people done to you? Why are you so full of hate?
UTHER (2x04 Lancelot and Guinevere) How many men would you have me sacrifice to save a servant? MORGANA As many as it takes!
to be honest, i wouldn’t be surprised if screaming, arguing and berating Uther about his morals and ethics is her way of proving that she is not weak or submissive to his actions. i mean, Morgana grew up in a household the complete opposite from her time in Camelot. Gorlois, the man whom Morgana considers to be her father and one and only family member, was said to be “just” and “kind” and someone that Uther even considered a good friend who openly kept him in check. Morgana, until the age of ten, understood parental love and empathy unlike Arthur, who spent his whole life without any good or healthy substance of it.
the culture of Camelot and Uther’s wrath is not something Morgana was ever able to fully acclimate to as Uther himself pointed out in 1x12. She “was at odds with [him] since the beginning” and could never picture herself as a Pendragon (point further proven in 4x05: she looked revolted when Queen Annis compared her to Uther) because she didn’t share in their idea of magic = evil and a king = absolute control.
ironic in terms of future plot events, isn’t it :’)
way #2
compare that to Arthur: man’s respressed af. keeps all his emotions under lock and key if they are anything but haughty and serious. y’all, Arthur even says it himself how he “[can't] disagree with Father [Uther] in public.” whenever Arthur finds himself at odds with Uther, he holds his tongue and waits until he can disobey secretly (2x05 when he leaves to rescue Gwen, 1x08 when he helps Morgana sneak out Mordred in the dark of the night, 2x08 when he sneaks out to meet Morgause for more info about his mom, etc). it is only the rare moments when Arthur feels impassioned enough to speak up without fearing any retribution does Arthur talk back at him (so satisfying 👌)
ARTHUR (1x03 Mark of Nimueh) [Morgana’s] right, Father. You hear the word magic, you no longer listen.
ARTHUR (2x08 Sins of the Father) This is what fuels your hatred for those who practice magic. Rather than blame yourself for what you did, you blame them….You hunted her kind like animals! How many hundreds have you condemned to death to ease your guilt?!….You speak of honour and nobility! You're nothing but a hypocrite and a liar!
ARTHUR (3x10 Queen of Hearts) You can't forbid my feelings any more than I can. I won't deny them any longer, I love her. I love Guinevere.
we can even compare how the two react to Uther’s violence towards them
(ahahahahahaaaaa what a wonderful dad)
on the left, you see Arthur’s face right when Uther crushes the morteus flower needed to heal Merlin (his manservant/friend/????) and on the right, is Morgana after Uther discovers she was harboring a Druid child in her chambers and she refuses to listen to his reason.
notice how both faces are remarkably similar 👀
however, Arthur’s look of shock and dismay come from his hope that Uther would do the right thing. that he would help save Merlin’s life from dying of poison. that he wouldn’t use this as a method to teach Arthur “what it means to disobey and cross the king.” he truly did hope, just like he always does with the people he holds close. Arthur cannot help but hope and trust that those close to him will not betray him and yet so many do. hence the remorse
looking at Morgana, her shock comes from the fact that this might be the first time Uther reacted to her words and actions in a physical manner. my suspicion is that most of the time, all Morgana previously got was Uther reprimanding her and yelling at her to stop questioning his methods (bc, let’s be real, she was the favorite child.) never has he lifted a finder on her like Arthur and i have proof (cue transcript!)
AND! and, Arthur is constantly warning Morgana about not angering Uther any further because of the consequences she might face (consequences this boy is very familiar with) when Uther deems it necessary to “teach” his children obedience.
UTHER (1x04 The Poisoned Chalice) You have to learn there's a right and a wrong way of doing things. I'll see you're let out in a week. Then you can find yourself another servant.
UTHER (3x10 Queen of Hearts) You have caused this to happen, Arthur. My decision is final [...] This is for your own good. - UTHER She will die. The enchantment will be broken. You'll see I was right.
UTHER (2x08 Sins of the Father) I am protecting you from your own foolishness!
so educational 🥰 but see, because Uther presents his punishments as lessons, Arthur himself views them as just a fucked up but meaningful way of his father’s concern because “yeah, I am the first born son and only heir to the throne. of course I need to learn not to do silly things like disobey, talk back to him, be my own person.” <- I’m paraphrasing here
Arthur does and has never seen a way out of the life thrust upon him by Uther (see 3x06). succeeding Uther as king, marrying a noblewoman of high standing for heirs and alliance strength was always expected of him. Arthur never saw a way out of this. even when he and Gwen were in their secret relationship phase, Arthur had to remind himself that this would never last. he loved her and knew she loved him, but there was always that reminder (that sounded a lot like Uther) in the back of his head telling him that it would never last so long as he was prince. he had a duty (constructed by Uther) to serve Camelot and going against his father would mean (in his eyes) that he is going against Camelot (as Uther always presented it to be).
so unlike Morgana, he did not kick and scream but stood firm because that was what he believed was stronger. if he stayed in his lane and did his part, then he would be a good king, maybe even a better one than his father, for Camelot. however, the show proves that differentiating himself from Uther actually made him the better king and more respected, but this is not the meta for that. I am getting side tracked.
OK: so we’ve established parental issues between the two siblings. now onto their very complex, complicated yet beloved dynamic
sO, as i mentioned in this post (because i am lazy and too tired to copy/paste the evidence from there), these siblings do care for one another. they just go about it in the most hilarious and repressed and in-denial way (hilarious to me 😤)
when we meet them, it’s established that these two have known each other for some time. enough for them to bicker and have banter, you know, as you do with a Pendragon. also, should add, neither character are ever aware they are blood-related until s3 (because of some weak-ass bitch named Uther), so you have that very, uh, interesting subplot in s1 that everybody forgets about until you rewatch it. (honestly, I have so many questions. number 1: why???? number 2: it’s only in s1—was it scrapped??? is it like it never existed???? what was its purpose to the plot??? bbc explain yourself—)
however, despite how much it is shown that they do care for one another, they’re relationship in s1 is still undefined and vague as if they also don’t know how to accurately define what the other means to them. it’s very similar to the whole “i really love this person so much but is what i’m feeling platonic, familial, or romantic?” because….you know, guy and girl besties who are close are typically expected to grow romantic feelings for each other, so tbh i would not be surprised if both mistook their love as romantically inclined in the beginning bc, reminder, neither of them were aware they were siblings until much later.
[and this is ALL i am saying on this subplot. i do not want to cause any negative discourse, so if anyone has a few choice words about it, either keep it to yourself or feel free to talk about it with people you know. personally? not a fan of the ship and never will be, but i am not here to post about that.]
anyway, have some featured receipts showing Arthur and Morgana slipping up and showing how much they care for each other.
SEE!!!! LOOK AT HOW THE CARE!!!! SEE HOW THEY WORRY FOR THE OTHER AND WISH TO PROTECT THEM FROM HARM!!! (and see how even when they’re on opposite sides there is still that same love. just more warped and corrupted T^T)
^worried/protective Morgana
^Arthur’s face after Merlin informs him that there’s an intruder heading to Morgana’s chambers
Morgana is very aware of Arthur’s trusting nature. Arthur is very aware of Morgana’s empathy and righteous nature. they understand each other so well which is why Morgana knew just how to harm Arthur in later seasons and why Morgana’s betrayal hit Arthur so hard. it’s also why he never stopped trying to reach out to her in s4 & s5. as @merlinemrys said in this lovely post, the show’s driving force is love. love of all kinds. whatever conflict it is, love is there at the center of it all and, in Arthur and Morgana’s case, it does not save them (just like how love does not save Merlin or Arthur from what lies ahead, as the op of the post pointed out).
that is what makes their relationship/love be like a double edged sword!! that is why they are edges of the same blade!!! they protect and fight for what they believe in and for the people they love, but the same blades cut deep and twist their wounds into a lasting scar.
it is because of Arthur’s love for Morgana that he cannot help but hope and mourn the woman he once knew. it is because of Morgana’s love for Arthur that her feelings of hatred are so strong and ugly.
like honestly,
look at them T^T compared to before
their relationship is so tragic T^T because we knew them before it all went wrong. we knew they cared and understood each other. we knew that for some time, they only had each other to rely on for a friend, a crutch, a breather for when the royal life was too much. both of them were fighters and strive to honor their values. both of them had once leaned on the other for support, had wanted nothing but happiness for each other.
fuck, they didn’t even get the chance to really be siblings because they found out too late, and by then Morgana was on a war path and Arthur only found out at the last minute.
like fuck, man
two sides of the same blade: forged with love, yet used for blood
screencaps brought to you by me, @sourdough-morbread, and farfarawaysite
#i will spare you the gorey details of me trying to fine decent screencaps & screenshots for this fucking post or else i’ll get pissed again#(i am considering whether it is worth it to go to war with youtube)#special thanks to my bestie mor for being there for me at the gorey times and helping me find more screenshots#fucking love you bestie 💕💕💕💕#also only including s1-2 bc i am tired and they are the ones where we get pendragon siblings not trying to kill each other#forgive me for always bringing up uther and the pendragon sibs’ upbringing with him it will happen again#also after hours of rereading transcripts and rewatching clips of bbc merlin: it is so obvious that uther cared and treated Morgana like hi#own child more than Arthur. like jfc he let’s her get away with so much stuff he is way for gentle with his words towards her#when he realizes that he was too cruel or rude like bro…..where tf was that for arthur#it just adds to the complicated sibling dynamic because there is the added jealousy and resentment of knowing a parent loved another more#literally most of Morgana’s time with Uther was her at odds with him and yet he views her as his child more#well no ducking dur that Arthur ‘i-would-do-anything-to-receive-my-father’s-love-attention-and-pride’ Pendragon resents Morgana for#always being the one Uther goes easier on and finds ways to turn a blind eye for like wtf#also during my research i was reminded of how done dirty Gwen’s story was by bbc#loses her father to a king fearful of magic barely gets to mourn him bc she now has to keep up the smithy and her maid job; reunites#with her brother who’s been AWOL for some years and still they don’t get a moment to talk about their dad and mourn TOGETHER#her storyline is pushed aside by s4 bc now she’s fulfilling the role of Arthur’s love interest and oh yeah they still need to incorporate#the lanceot/guinevere scandal and then banish her for some episodes without even letting her brother be mad about it like ?????#anyway#continued saga of fluffy rereading transcripts -> uther: ‘it’s been a long time since Ygraine…since anyone’ me: ducking liar >:(#[sir leon begins the slow clap] king you dropped this 👑IT IS 1AM HELP 😂#place your bets on where my laziness for evidence came in! (I honestly don’t know lol scavenging evidence is all a blur)#spent 2 days on this post lol#me: ok i think that’s enough evidence for this argument…………ok maybe ONE more won’t hur—#me after day 2: ….am i done???? am i free????#pendragon siblings coming behind me with a steel chair: nah mate!#me: FUCK THERE’S MORE#bbc merlin#merlin meta#pendragon sibs
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obsessed with the Sanderson x Cupid ship to the point I think their anti’s would also get along. but instead of a late night tv show, Anti-Cupid runs an interview show like Eric Andre where he and anti-Sanderson just fuck with the guests and cause general chaos
#fop anti cupid#anti cupid#fop sanderson#my art#I rarely see people talk about the anti pixies which is a shame because the concept is hilarious to me#this was also an excuse to rewatch Eric Andre clips BUT it fit in with my headcanon#not that it matters but in my head anti Cupid sounds like Alex brightman. where he’s between beetlejuice and fizzarolli#it just seems funny to contrast Tom Kenny being Cupid#and anti Cupid loves his pixie boyfriend he’s just too embarrassed to admit it#maybe this will do better here than it did on twt. my popular ship art gets more attention than the goofy stuff#this is ‘older’ art I’ll post newer stuff when I draw more stuff#I love anti-Cupid he is my everything#triangular shutter shades just feel more fitting for anti pixies of course I love the regular shades but shutter shades are fun#fairly oddparents#fop fanart
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me live posting ep 10 of tmagp
MR BONZO!!!!!!
MR 6!!!!!!
BURIED!!!!!!!!
CREEPY MUSIC!!!!!
NO ONE REMEMERS WHO NAMED BONZO!!!!!!
THE MIRROR RAN A SHOW ON A CHEF!!!!!
RIMBO!!!
CLOWNS!!!!!
HE ATTACKED HIM WITH A FRYING PAN
IT WAS ALL BONZO!!!!
THE CREEPY MUSIC IS CLOWN LIKE
THERE WERE 11 BODIES
GWEN!!!! THATS GWEN!! OR WAIT IS IT LENA???? DOES SHE DO WORK TO?? NO THATS CELIA!!!! AND COLIN!!!! HE SOUNDS BETTER!!!!!!
CELIA WAS VERY UNIMPRESSED BY THE STATEMENT!!!
THREE THERAPISTS!!!! WOW DUDE. HE ISNT BETTER. AHHH CELIA AND COLIN SECRET!!! WAIT FREDDY DID SOMETHING? NO IM CRAZY! OH COLINS HERE WITHOUT LENA KNOWING!!!!
SAM AND ALICE!!!! MY TWO FAVORITE GIRL FAILS!!!!
RATS!!!!!
‘ILL KNOW IT WHEN I SEE IT’!!!
AHHHH ALICE IS HERE BECAUSE SHE LOVES SAM!!!!!
celia is there on a saturday??
is this the same day?
WHAT IS THAT!!!!!
SAM DID KNOW IT WHEN HE SAW IT!
Mulch
SAM IS NOT FINE
:(
CARVED FLOOR IN THE BIG ATRIUM
no clue how to spell that
THERES SOMETHING ELSE!
A KEY!
BONZO!!!!!!!! GWEN!!!!!!!! actually i don’t know if it’s bonzo. NIGEL!!! ITS NOT FOR HIM!!?! FOR BONZO???? CREEPY MUSIC!!!
OH MY GOD WTF
DONT STARE
GWEN GIVE IT TO HIM
BONZO!!!!!!!!
GWEN DW YOU CANT DIE THIS EARLY
YOUR WELCOME AGAIN??? HIS HOUSE????
GWEN YOU GOOD???
ALICE AND SAM!!!!!!
HE BROKE THROUGH A FUCKIN DOOR?
WHOS OFFICE???? JONS???? ARCHIE???? ARCHIE-VIST
SHE SAID IT SHE SAID IT!!!!!!!!! ARCHIVE ARCHIVE!!!!!
WORM TRACKS!!!! OTHERWORLDLY POWER!!!!!
CAREFUL!!!!
SAM ARE YOU OK?????
alice is sexy
WE STILL HAVE TIME LEFT IN THE EP
MEMORIES WITHOUT CONTEXT
WHY DID THEY NOT CHOOSE HIM
AWWWW ALICE CARES
NOT A LOT THO
IF I ACTUALLY SHIPPED THEM I WOULD BE EATING GOOD WITH THIS!!!!
WHO LEFT THEIR PHONE???
SAM???
THERES SCURRYING
AND SHIT HAPPENING
IM SCARED!!!!
DOOR!!? WHOS THERE??? JON??? FEARS??? SOMETHING ELSE????
#tmagp#the magnus protocol#gwen bouchard#gwendolyn bouchard#samama khalid#sam khalid#alice dyer#celia ripley#colin becher#mr bonzo#BETH EYRE AS ERROR?????#IVE LEARNED THAT IT WAS A TAPE RECORDER??????#NOT SAMS PHONE???????#OH MY GOD!!!!#WTF??#WAIT WAIT AHHHHHHHH THIS IS AHHHHHH#SO MUCH SHIT#I WAS LOOKING AT THE CREDITS FOR EVERYONES NAMES SINCE I CANT REMEMBER THEM ALL#SO THATS WHEN I SAW BETH EYRE#THEN WANTED TO SEE IF BETH HAD BEEN ACCOCIATED WITH TMA OR TMAGP BEFORE#THEN FOUND A REDDIT POST THAT TALKED ABOUT THE TAPE RECORDER#9/10 episode#just wish it had more gwen and preferably some gwen and alice but i’ll take what i can get#i’m use to being a bottom feeder
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I'm not sure if it's an intentional thing or not but
I've noticed that your Stanley doesn't have another eye? It's cool tbh but is there some kinda lore or whatnot that connects it?
I’ve gotten an ask about this before but I’ll answer this one too :3
Yeah it’s intentional, I (almost) always draw him with just one eye, but there isn’t really a lore reason for it.
In 2022 when I first started drawing tsp I characterized Stanley’s lack of identity and speech by only drawing him with one eye —To make him more of a blank slate nobody yk?— But as I started drawing him more and more I decided to give him his mouth back so he could express emotions more. (Basically because it was easier to draw)
But maybe in the context of the post-parable au it could have meaning. He, and anyone else, sees his second eye, while the viewer is an outlier. It could be a visual indicator to show that Stanley, despite his average looks, is not fully human. Because he wasn’t fully human in the parable, why would he suddenly be now?
More subtly, The Narrator also has inhuman traits hidden in him that also serve as a indicator that he is not of this world. Those might be revealed later though
#.exe#.txt#I am known to ramble given the chance#tbh if I get more asks about his eye I’m just gonna start gaslighting ppl /nm /j#‘huh? wuh? what missing eye? he has both eyes what are you talking about?’#might be funny#to me at least#anyway thank you for the ask I love it when people ask me about my designs#I’d love to go on about my Narrator au design one day but I’ll keep my mouth shut just for now#the stanley parable#post parable au
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it’s 3am and i’ve spent the past few hours drawing a bunch of doodles of me and anton hanging out together like we’re the bestest of friends because it’s my art and i can draw whatever i want forever
#i’ll post the drawings this weekend probably#anton oc#wyrms says stuff#wyrms lore#it’s 3am and i am not tired but i also have to get up early so#hey at least i don’t have any classes on fridays so that’s good#wow anton is so cool#wow#wow i love him so much more than anything really#platonically obviously we’re both very aroace#and i know if he was real we’d be best friends we’d do everything together#we’d go see that absolutely horrendous looking minecraft movie on opening night together#he’d talk to me about rats and science and snakes and i’d talk about undertale and tma and gravity falls#we’d have so much fun i’d teach him how to play video games and he would love it so much#and he’d show me all of his weird and wacky science experiments and he’d be so silly about it#and we’d go on walks in his forest and he’d show me all the animals#and we’d comfort eachother when we’re sad and it would be so cozy and safe#we would have eachother and understand eachother that’s all we will ever need#wow he’s just so real to me guys#like he feels so real#and i’m so genuinely sad that he’s not#he deserves to exist he deserves to be happy#the fact he doesn’t exist feels like i lost someone extremely close to me and will never get them back#it’s like i’m grieving the loss of someone who never existed and it hurts#he deserves to exist :(#ouughhh#this is devastating#it hurts#i should go to sleep#:(
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find a blorbo (nhl tag game)
RULES: Go through the roster of each NHL team and find at least one player that you can root for.
tagged by @bondedpairs!! when i say too many teams to count and here for the narrative um. i may not have lied. this is not an extensive list of my blorbos but in order to make it not ten thousand years long i made up the rule that i had to do it straight from memory :)
anaheim ducks: as evidenced by recent events i DO like mason mctavish and trevor zegras but i have to honor laura and mention troy terry and beloved goalie gibbie*
boston bruins: oh for sure brad marchand… can i say patrice? one of the charlies got traded but i think mcavoy is still there because gryz is gone, brandon carlo is there still i think
buffalo sabres: cozens & thompson, owen power, rasmus dahlin, ukko pekka luukkonen
calgary flames: is chris tanev still here? is markstrom still here?? noah hanifin?? as a last resort i’ll say blasty
carolina hurricanes: aho & jarvy & teuvo teravainen & brent burns is still playing maybe? i know sepe got traded
chicago hockey: the bedsy narrative is compelling but ANDREAS ATHANASIOU MY BELOVED reunited with tyler bertuzzi… that’s the real story. also i like foligno
colorado avalanche: gabe landeskog, whatever ross colton & miles wood have going on, natemac + jo, mikko
columbus blue jackets: have long been on the merzlikins train, have been swayed to the darkside of umich boys (brindley, kent johnson, fantilli, blankenburg who is now on nsh)
dallas stars: seggy! mush! roope + miro and otter and robo and wyjo (rip ty dellandrea) and harls! etc.
detroit red wings: MOST players. dilly larks, moritz seider, jv, raymond, rasmussen, kitty, lyon, etc except for k*ne
edmonton oilers: mcdrai, ofc. nugent-hopkins, nursey, rip vinny & skinny
florida panthers: tkachuk, reinhardt, sasha barkov, verhaeghe (is there still?)
los angeles kings: adrian kempe… kevin fiala… danault… quinton byfield & alex turcotte
minnesota wild: kirill, marat, fleury, brodes, fabes, boldy, moose, middsy, spurge… god’s perfect idiots
montreal canadiens: going out on a limb here to say martin st. louis but also xhekaj (both), slafkovský, suzuki, my austrian reinbacher, yes fine cole caufield
nashville predators: MOST BEAUTIFUL D PAIR IN THE WORLD GRADY SKJEI AND ROMAN JOSI!! juuse, evangelista, isn’t stamkos there and also someone else who absolutely should not be
new jersey devils: nico… tuna (tatar), dawson mercer, siegenthaler, dougie hamilton, yes the hugheses whatever
new york islanders: barzy, zeeker & marty, anders lee, noah dobson lol
new york rangers: mika & chris, lafrenière & k’andre, shesterkin
philadelphia flyers: frosty & beezer and tk and sanny and the new baby michkov and coots and scooty loots and foerster etc etc. you know the Guys
pittsburgh penguins: the two headed monster but also compelled by rutger mcgroarty, and kevin hayes was there!!!
ottawa senators: timmy stü & brady! josh norris! the evolution of shane pinto! ullmark now and brännström and claude giroux and chabot
san jose sharks: ekky, thrun, mario, borde, logan couture, shakir, that other vaguely blond rookie
seattle kraken: brandon tanev, andre burakovsky! grubauer & d’accord also
st. louis blues: jordan kyrou, nathan walker (is still there?), rob thomas? is parayako still there?
tampa bay lightning: hedman, point, they dumped so many guys after the cup run… is kucherov still there or is he in nashville?? anthony cirelli (notable for being made out with by pat maroon)
toronto maple leafs: mitch, jt, willy, alex nylander, kniesy, dewar, et
utah hockey: crouse, keller, tuba
vancouver canucks: quinn, brock, petey, jt, garly, höggy, i want to say dakota johnson, elias lindholm?
vegas golden knights: brandon montour is here now… alex pietrangelo, so sorry to one i can’t remember who loves the lions it will come back to me
washington capitals: full of love and stupidity. oshie, nicke/ovi, pierre-luc dubois, dowd, vrána, milano
winnipeg jets: adam lowry!! josh morissey and kc and morgan barron, also vladdy my beloved
tagging @stillfertile + @colap1nto + @songsandswords + @moregraceful if they haven’t done it yet, i know they follow at least a couple teams. if anybody else wants to play i love adopting blorbos!!
#it is literally my DREAM to get challenged by someone about how many hockey guys i can name because i am a freak like that#and i make up arguments in my head for fun. please Try Meeeee#me when i wear all of my different crewnecks out & make up an imaginary argument where i have to list five guys from every team… ok why not#in doing this i hope i expose so many of you to narratives and also don’t show my ass because we’re at the point in the season where i go#‘he got traded WHERE???’ & i forget where everyone got moved around 🫡 everyone who watches a game has to deal with me regularly going WAIT#tag games#liv in the replies#this is secretly just a love letter to everyone i follow who got me invested in these narratives. i WILL adopt ur interests &speech pattern#and like. it very much does NOT even come close to reflecting the narratives i have and will be invested in#hated my own rule as soon as i made it but it prevented me from creating an even MORE elaborate set of rules which was like. would you#actually root for this guy playing hockey vs are these all narrative characters so you need to them be able to back it up with a fic#which. given that it’s BLORBO i was like none of them are about to named on the basis of their hockey and also i am a giant hater#if you’re playing the red wings i want you to lose if the red wings are out i cannot guarantee who i will root for. it is up to The Spirit#this took me too long… worth it#like I don’t know as if i’ll ever make a proper pinned post but this is high in contention simply for the fact that i just Talk about Guys#you guys missed the part where i tried to do it in alphabetical order but completely forgot all teams that started with a p and colorado#among other teams and then i had to google ‘32 nhl teams’ because i could not for the life of me figure out who i was missing. rip ottawa#which is so funny because i love so many guys on their team. like. this list is such evidence of my BLANKING on the spot under pressure.#*everyone who saw this say stolarz no you didn’t. listen i knew ONE of them had gotten traded 😭 and literally during the pre-season det/tor#game today i heard ‘stolarz’ and went OH FUCK NO OH NO and wheezed my way here to fix it.
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