#I’d take the queers any day

[king-anvl]

Fore the night is dark and full of terrors

That one Queensguard having to watch Alicent and Rhaenyra argue like a messy divorced couple in the middle of his night shift

[atyourmerci]

Vengeance (500 followers celebration!!)

The boat scene we deserved ;)

♡ ♡

Summary: Abby finds you drunk, hiding away on a boat. Will you leave your girlfriend and run off with your childhood love?

Warnings: smut, MDNI, dom!abby, sub!reader, hate sex, abby being possessive, cheating (tsk tsk don’t do this), fingering, slapping, slight overstimulation, dubcon since reader is drunk but consenting

A/N: so this is the overall winning poll for the celebration so I hope you all enjoy! I don’t think I’ve ever read boat scene for queer abby so I’m like lowkey scared if this is uncharted territory lmao. Also this like loosely?? Follows what happens in g2 but I just made it gay as fuck also unrealistic for the relationship dynamic but I! Don’t! Care! Okay bye!

♡ ♡

“Thought I’d find you here,” she looks disappointed, but knowingly. Of course she would find you here, where the fuck else would you have gone, home? There was no home.

“Ya’no he’ll kill you too for just coming to find me,” slurs out your mouth, you’d be drinking since dawn perhaps. Drinking every bit you have left, not like you’d have a rainy day in store for you come sunlight.

“I’ll take my chances…” she situates herself up on the bench with her forearms lazily cast over her thighs, “how much have you had to drink,” it’s not accusatory, more of a redundant question she knew the answer to before she’d ever taken off to find you.

You take another hefty swig straight from the dirty bottle, letting the lip knock against your teeth. “Fuck off,” you throw out at her, eyes cast on the doorway she had walked through, both dead men walking now.

“So you want to tell me what happened,” now she begins to pry, all the rumors she had heard, maybe they were true, but she thought she knew you better. Once she did, when she was yours, if you could even call it that. Perhaps unspoken puppy love, a trauma bond of sorts. Whatever it was, was over, not that you ever had the decency to tell her. You were with someone else now, whether it was right or not, it was your newfound reality.

“I’m not like you…” your gaze meets hers at last, the words trail off, she knew what she had heard was true. “I couldn’t fucking do it, she was pregnant, begged for me to spare her…the kid. You don’t understand what it’s like, my morals are fucked from those people. This isn’t us. This isn’t you.”

“You don’t think I’ve been put in fucked situations?”

“That’s my point abby, this is all fucked…” you throw your hands hazardously in the air that springs droplets of the honey liquor flying out. Your feet move on their own, bringing you into an upright position as you begin closing in on her, “we are all just chess pieces in their game, when will you understand that.”

She rises out of her seat to meet your stance, she was much stronger, much more intimidating than you could ever surmount to, but the honey liquid encouragement was working overtime. “So you’re just going to run off? you can’t escape this,” her words reek of venom now.

“Come with me,” it comes out as a plea, but confident in meaning. She lets out a scoff at your attempt, shaking her head at your scheme. “What you’re just going to leave her?” She didn’t need to give a name, a further explanation, you both knew the predicament well enough.

Would you leave her?

“Yes.”

“You’re a fucking ass you know that-“ she begins to walk past you but you take grip at her muscled bicep, you feel as it twitches under your grasp.

“Abby-“ you begin to plead. She gives you one last look of adoration before ripping you to pieces.

She begins backing you into the nearest wall, pushing her hands into your chest to get you to her desired location, “no- fuck you- you don’t get to do that anymore.” She continues to dig her palms into your chest, you try to pull them off of you to no avail, on any day you’d be no match for her strength, but today the liquor only worsened your case.

“You know you’re different,” you bite at her, deepening your gaze, letting your eyes speak louder than your words could. She takes a moment to stare at you, truly wondering if you’d even meant it, if she knew the truth. “Don’t fucking do that-“ her palm grips at your throat now with no real threat as her other palm continues to dig into the flesh of your chest.

“You know it’s true abby.”

“God I fucking hate you,” she says through gritted teeth. She can barely get out the sentence before clashing her mouth against yours. She ravenous, eating you alive, digging her fingers into your soft flesh. She wasn’t allowed to have you for so long, but now, for however long she could, she’d reclaim what was hers.

Shes sloppy, mouth messy against yours as you both fight for dominance, dueling for the right over one another. While her teeth begin to bite down at your lip she brings her wavering fingers to the button of your jeans, attempting to break you out of any confines that are in her way. She rips them down off of you with no generosity as she whips you around so that your chest and palms are pressed into the wall.

You can’t see her, she wanted it that way. This was wrong, but she couldn’t stop herself. In the end you were always hers anyways.

You’re left panting into the cold wood of the walls, awaiting her punishment. Her large hands grip into your bare hips, jutting them out so they meet her completely clothed pelvis.

“Always were so pliable huh?” She taunts into the shell of your ear, making you shutter under her breath.

“I hate that you made it happen like this,” her hand swings down and lays a stinging smack into the meat of your ass, you breathe out hoarsely. “I hate what you do to me,” another smack is laid into you, this time eliciting a whine to escape your throat. “I fucking hate what you make me feel,” this time the infliction came harder than the rest, the slick now beginning to run down your thighs, aching so badly to be touched.

“Abby- please.”

Her knee comes between your own, opening them up wider for her, your slick stringing a sticky web between your thighs. Her hand snakes around your waist, without warning leaving a gentle smack onto the mound. You let out an eager whimper at the decadent pain. She rubs the wound quickly after, feeling your built up arousal in her fingertips that elicits a smug groan in your ear.

She continues to rub down your slick slit with no true target in mind, coaxing as many pathetic moans she could get at her indirection for your pleasure.

“Does she touch you like this?”

You don’t respond, brain too fuzzy to play into her antics. Another smack is laid into the soft pink flesh, hitting your swollen clit perfectly.

“Do you let her?” She says with more aggression this time, rubbing harsh circles around your clit now. You can’t help the guttural moan that comes out, “y-YES.” You should lie, but you didn’t want to know what she would do if she found out you were lying.

Her pace doesn’t falter, continuously circling the swollen bud, “does she feel better.” You pause for a moment, knowing the answer but forced with the moral dilemma of speaking it- “no.”

“I know.” Her fingers come off your clit causing a pathetic whine out of you. Her hand comes to the back of you now, her fingertips prodding at your fluttering hole, teasing the impending doom of her cruelty.

“Deep breath,” she commands of you. You pace your rapid breathing to suck in deep- when she hears the air hit your lungs she plunges her pointer and middle finger deep inside. There’s no grace, no sympathy as she beats into you. Her fingers already coated in your slick haphazardly plunging into your sweet spot.

Your screams don’t stop now, so completely full from her fingers, lust coating your eyes over white. You bite into her forearm placed next to your head to stabilize herself, teeth cutting close to the bulging veins. Her own breath beginning to falter, you can hear the faint moans trailing out her own mouth, almost completely covered by your moans.

Your walls start closing in on her fingers, she rips her free hand out of the tight enclosure of your mouth, in seconds working tight circles on your enlarged clit. The sensation of both stimulants drawing you to the edge of your climax “abby- I’m going t-“

“Tell me you don’t love her.”

She wasn’t going to make this easy, of course she wasn’t. But you’d do anything for release now. “I don’t- I- don’t!”

Her fingertips on your clit stop circling as she pinches onto it, and thrusts even harder into your hole, “say her fucking name.”

You’re screaming out, breathless, mind numb, you’d kill to finish at this point.

“I don’t love Ellie! Please!”

“Good girl now cum on my fingers,” and like that she continued, fucking into you relentlessly, fingers barely stable coated in slick at your clit.

Your ears began to ring as your orgasm took full autonomy over you, sending waves of pleasure down your pathetic structure and out through your needy throat. All you could muster out was incoherent spells of curses and the name of your capture. She took everything she could from you, never letting up till you begin to shake from the overstimulation.

Her fingers trailed from your clit to your hip, she dug her nails into the flesh there. The fingers wedged in your hole remained, gently thrusting when she felt it pulse, eliciting strained whimpers from you.

“I hate that I love you,” as she pulled her fingers out of you, leaving you there limp.

What happened before this?

Taglist: @wishbones999 @bookpagecandlescent @littlegingerperson5 @lookforthelight1 @fict1onallyobsessed @shewantstoknow @a-little-bit-of-everybody

[lovelettersfromluna]

Here are a few Love Island!Ellie head canons because god…with how this season is going so far? I need it.

an: This is truly written from a place of fun! This isn’t to be taken seriously AT ALL! This is a funny little Drabble I whipped up in line twenty minutes because I thought it would be funny after my post I made a day or two ago. This isn’t for anyone and is 100% geared to a very specific audience 😭 also if any of you are watching this season of Love Island USA, can we please chat about it in the comments??? What are your thoughts???? Anyways, enjoy!! 🤍

• First of all…queer Love Island??

• I know there’s a queer Ultimatum but…the chaos of Love Island is just something I need to see with a house full of women instead

• Let’s start things off by talking about you

• Your intro is most definitely the one that catches everyone’s attention out of all the other girls. You have a personality that hasn’t exactly been seen in the seasons prior to yours and something about you just feels fresh you know?

• Your intro song is After Hours by Kehlani don’t fight me on this

• I really like how this season started with the girls arriving at night rather than in the middle of the day? Makes an easier transition I feel, so it’s the same for this too I’d say

• You aren’t the first to arrive, so you and the other girls (who you are losing your mind over they’re all so gorgeous and you’re already mentally taking note of who you want to pull for a chat later) when the last few singles arrive.

• They save the best for last of course

• Ellie’s intro 100% paints her out to be the bad girl of the season. Like come on, those tattoos? That fucking face?? The icing on the cake is that her intro song is Bandit by Don Toliver

• When she’s making her rounds of introducing herself to everyone, her eyes on yours immediately.

• Because she knew there would be hot girls in the villa, but Jesus fucking Christ???

• Now, contrary to what you might think, you and Ellie aren’t actually coupled up that night.

• Because you’re here to explore connections! And as much as Ellie literally takes your breath away with that fucking look in her eyes when she first spots you, there are other girls here that you like too.

• And you can also tell Ellie’s type from a mile away, and you’d rather steer clear of that before making any permanent reservations and making yourself look like an idiot for millions of people all over the world to see (we see what Leah is going through with Rob 🫠 let’s avoid that shall we?)

• Ellie though, is relentless.

• Because in her mind, she sees things completely differently.

• Why the hell would she waste her time talking to other random girls whenever you’re right here! Sleeping two or three beds across from her with some idiot instead of her.

• She’s shameless with it honestly.

• She’s always pulling you to chat with her, long fingers lingering on the supple skin of your thigh as you two are sat in the big swing or on the bean bags.

• “why didn’t you wanna couple up with me out first night?” She hums out softly, her head resting on one of the brightly colored pillows as she pulls your legs into her lap (while the girl you’re couple with and the girl she’s coupled with are literally across the villa)

• You giggle softly because she’s wasting no time in trying to get you comfy enough with her to choose her for the next re-coupling and it’s making your head spin.

• In all honesty? You didn’t choose her because you knew the moment you coupled up with Ellie, you’d be spoiled for everyone else.

• And shit hits the fan basically overnight here in the villa, so you’d rather not put all your eggs in one basket on the first fucking night (you refuse to have your family watch you be an idiot at home)

• She groans when you explain that to her, pressing her forehead to your shoulder as her teeth nip at your skin, which makes you nudge her playfully because she is getting way too close and the girl you’re coupled up with is shooting daggers with her eyes at the both of you.

• It also is not helping that Ellie is wearing the cutest black triangle bikini top with a pair of shorts and it’s just…god…her body is fucking insane.

• Later that night it’s the same, you’re upstairs doing your makeup with some of the others girls, having a bit of a recap of everything while spilling a bit of tea and gossip on what you’ve all gathered throughout the day.

• The topic of you and Ellie is top of the list on what the girls ask you about the moment you settle down in your chair to start getting ready for the night, and it makes you smile shyly as you try to find the words to say.

• Especially since the girl thats coupled up with Ellie could walk in at any moment….

• “Yeah uh…I dunno….I really like her but I feel like I need to also explore connections, you know?” You explain, your words a bit muffled as you apply your lip liner onto your lips.

• “With the way she looks at you? Exploring connections won’t be that easy” one of the girls hums out, causing the others and yourself to erupt in a fit of laughter.

• Ellie is quick to snatch you away once again when you and the other girls come downstairs to meet with their couples, barely giving the girl you’re actually coupled up with the time to give you a proper hug and kiss after you’ve all cheered to your second night there.

• I’d like to think that Ellie really values her privacy in the villa, and even though it’s damn near impossible to actually get away from all eyes and ears, she tries her best any way.

• Her hands are interlocked with yours, your heels clanking against the wood of the stairs as she pulls you up to Soul Ties (YUUUPPPP IYKYK)

• She’s staring deeply into your eyes as she brings her cup to her lips, taking a sip of her wine before she settles back against the mountain of pillows behind you, her hands toying with the frilly fabric of your dress.

• “You know I wouldn’t wanna be with anyone else in here but you…right?” She hums out softly, fingers dancing along the exposed skin of your thighs.

• And you can’t help but bite back a laugh, because this seems soooo illogical to you! Like it’s only been two days at this point?

• Ellie groans when you try to explain this to her. “Yeah but it’s different…I’m with you all the time…it isn’t like things on the outside” she pouts out, clearly annoyed with the fact that you’re still keeping walls up with her.

• It makes you sigh softly, because at this point you know you’re only holding yourself back from possibly having the strongest connection in the entire villa, but you want to play the game right! You want to explore the connections that have been placed before you without any regrets.

• But then Ellie’s eyes are going low, and you can see her leaning in closer, her legs interlocking with yours as her hand comes up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, and you already know what’s coming.

• Her lips are so soft, and she’s probably the best kisser you’ve ever had. It’s slow and sensual and the champagne in your system already has you buzzing a bit, a soft moan leaving your mouth as your hands go down to tug on her shirt slightly, her tongue working against yours.

• it’s easy in that moment to forget that you and her aren’t mic-ed up and there aren’t about a hundred different hidden cameras pointing at the both of you catching every angle of your face, because it just feels that good.

• But you’re quick to break the kiss once you remember that everything is being recorded, and you’re still in a fucking couple

• And even though you’re honest with the girl you’ve coupled up with about the kiss, and you explain to her that you’re still opened to getting to know her, in true Love Island fashion, your time with Ellie doesn’t stop.

• It goes on that way until the next re-coupling, and obviously your choice is saved for last because the anticipation of it all has been growing and your storyline seems to be the one that the viewers at home have been the most eager to watch.

• Of course, you choose Ellie.

• Not only because you feel the best when you’re with her, but also because leading people on just feels icky, and you don’t want anyone to perceive you as that sort of person.

• Ellie is over the moon of course, her hands wrapping around your waist and pulling you in close the second she’s sat next to you around the fire pit.

• And even though you’re sharing a room with like twelve other people, you get the best sleep you’d gotten in months when you’re sleeping next to Ellie.

• not before a kiss or two is shared before you sleep though 😌

• And that’s how things go for a while! You and Ellie are viewed as the most solid couple for quite some time, the camera always catching you and her lounged out by the pool talking about your families, or her bringing you breakfast in the morning when you’re getting ready with the others girls.

• “Yeah…my dad would love you. I bet you he knew I’d go for you the second he saw you” she hums out as you two are cuddled up on the swing, which makes you giggle softly. (Joel 100% struggles watching his daughter make out with someone else’s daughter every night but he does see how much Ellie likes you)

• Ellie frowns deeply as her eyes scan the fridge and the pantry of the out door kitchen as she’s outside with some of the other girls. “All they have are fuckin’ avocados and eggs?” She huffs out in annoyance before she settles on whipping you up some avocado toast and filling up your water bottle.

• She’s awkward when she brings it up, shy smile on her face as she peeks into the makeup room, eyes scanning the space for you. Her expression instantly brightens when she spots you pulling your hair up into a pony tail, making her way to you to press a kiss to your head before setting your breakfast down in front of you.

• “Didn’t know if you were hungry…so…yeah…” she mumbles out softly, which makes you giggle softly before thanking her and pressing a kiss to her cheek.

• The viewers at home and your fellow islanders quickly mark you and Ellie as the “married couple” of the villa.

• HOWEVER

• What’s Love Island without a couple of bombshells?

• You can’t stay too comfortable in a place like Love Island, especially when you hear that familiar ping coming from someone’s phone.

• It’s yours, and it happens when you’re out by the pool with a few other girls, trying your best to give advice with the relationship issues that they’re having.

• “I’ve been keeping an eye on you from the outside…but now it’s my turn. Meet me out by the beach for a surprise. And wear something pretty…..

Xoxo Abby”

• The girls you’re sitting with erupt in squeals and giggles, grabbing you and shaking you as you sit there in awe, your mouth hanging open as you stare down at the phone, reading the message over and over again.

• Ellie is on the other side of the villa looking as if she’s ready to kill someone, because who the fuck is Abby?

• You obviously have no choice but to go, and while you’re upstairs getting dressed with the other girls you feel a bit excited? Nervous? It was your first time outside of the villa in almost two weeks and it was for a date with a fucking bombshell??

• Once you’re finished getting dressed, you make your way downstairs to talk to Ellie, because you know you have to.

• Wrapping your arms around her waist and pulling her close makes you feel bad, because it’s easy to forget that the producers are obviously trying to test your relationship with Ellie and see which one of you will break first.

• But that doesn’t make it feel any better.

• “I’ll miss you…I’m sure it’ll be fine…she probably just wants to shake things up here” you assure Ellie with a soft kiss to her cheek.

• She frowns softly as she nods, pulling you close to her chest before she sighs, her feelings clearly in shambles as she stares into your eyes.

• “Yeah…have fun…” she mumbles out softly before she presses a soft kiss to your lips, letting it linger for a moment before letting you go.

• You desperately hope that this girl is a raging asshole who you’ll hate the moment you see her.

• But would she even be a bombshell if she wasn’t perfect?

• Abby looks like a fucking goddess sitting on the beach waiting for you. You aren’t sure you’ve ever seen muscles like hers before, and something in you wants her to show you if they’re just for show or not.

• WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, YOU ARE SPOKEN FOR

• Abby hits all the marks. She makes you feel comfortable, she makes you laugh, and she manages to make your cheeks and ears warm up every time she sends another flirty compliment your way.

• “So…I see you’ve been coupled up with Ellie…how’s that been?” She asks you gently, the gentle ocean breeze blowing through her pretty blond hair, making your head fucking spin.

• You’re honest with her. You tell her that you and Ellie have been very solid since the moment you’ve coupled up. You explain to her that you didn’t choose her in the beginning for the sole purpose of knowing just how attached you’d get to her when you were actually coupled up with her.

• “Yeah um…I think I’m falling for her actually” you mumble out shyly as you stare down into the bottom of your glass, watching as the bubbles of the champagne rise to the surface only to fizzle out shortly after.

• Abby hums softly as she nods at your words, taking a sip of her drink before she speaks. “She seems cool…but it’s early days, yeah? Still exploring a bit?” Abby asks hopefully.

•When you look up and lock eyes with her, you feel the air leave your lungs, because god she is so fucking pretty. Her pink lips are tugged between her teeth, and it makes you have to swallow back a whimper.

• And like an idiot that is charmed by the beauty of this actual goddess, you fucking nod.

• She chuckles softly before she nods with you. “That’s good to hear baby…” she hums softly before she leans in and kisses you.

• Would she be a bombshell if she didn’t kiss you on the first date???

• Back at the villa, Ellie is losing her shit.

• Because everyone is asking her if she thinks you’ll fold, and if she thinks this is a test to your relationship that you’ll pass, and it’s making her want to fucking throw up.

• And now she’s starting to feel the heat of this fucking show, because none of this would’ve been a problem if she had met you on the outside.

• She’s in the middle of pacing when you and Abby come back to the villa later that night, the sound of the group of friends you’d made squealing once they spot you and Abby coming in through the balcony.

• Hand in hand.

• That’s right, Abby brings you back into the villa, with her fingers interlocked with yours.

• Ellie wants to throw herself into the fucking ocean at that point.

• Her confessionals are filled with her groaning and bitching about how she could never compete with Abby, and how her muscles are probably fake anyways, anything to discredit the girls goddess fucking physique.

• you obviously pull Ellie for a chat once the others pull Abby to get to know her, because even though she chose you for the date, the others want to get to know her the moment they see her.

• But even as you talk to Ellie and try to console her feelings, it really all boils down to you and which one you feel the most connected to.

• So? Who would you choose?

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for being honest about what I would change about my boyfriend?

🥊🥊

I’m a cis guy (22m) and I have a boyfriend that’s transgender (20m). We’ve been together for 2 years.

My boyfriend is a very cute guy and he gets hit on a lot in queer spaces tbh. even by lesbians, and they fully see him as a guy. He’s just very sweet and approachable I guess. A lot of people tell him he’s super attractive and I agree, but there are just certain things about his body that don’t appeal to me.

We were at a friend’s birthday party. People got drunk, I was tipsy. We played this game that was like cards with questions about relationships/love/intimacy on them and the whole group would discuss.

One of the questions was something along the lines of "If you could change anything about your partner, what would it be?" Or whatever.

Now, I went first and said I’d probably make him less hairy and get rid of the dark spots in his crotch area and his acne scars. He has some discoloration around his private areas from a rash he got when he was like 13 and some faint scarring from pimples I guess. It’s not an issue, but definitely not my preference. Plus he can’t really shave clean down there because he has thick hair and it always makes him get those razor burn bumps or whatever. Fine by me, he’s hot as hell either way.

Plus, he has a lot of discoloration around his shoulders, back, chest and face from severe acne outbreaks from his puberty and then later again when he started taking testosterone. It’s calmed down a lot, but the scarring is still very prominent. It’s not an issue, just not very pretty to look at.

Please don’t get me wrong. He’s an incredibly attractive person, I just wish his skin was a little prettier. It’s a bit of a turnoff, that’s all. It never stopped me from being absolutely enamored with him.

But when I explained this, a little less explicitly than this of course, the group went dead silent. Everyone was staring at me, some of the girls even clasped their hands over their mouths etc.

When I looked at my boyfriend he was completely pale and was just blankly staring at me before getting up and saying he needs to pee. I just said okay and then gave the card to the person next to me. She very quietly said she’d take away her girlfriend’s anxiety because it hurts her to see the person she loves like that. That’s when it sort of dawned on me that I messed up and that I was way out of line for saying these things in front of our friends.

He apparently left soon after that, which I only found out through a friend. I was a little confused but figured he was just a little embarrassed. We don’t live together, so it isn’t unusual for one of us to leave before the other. But then I found out that his best friend left with him because he was sobbing and couldn’t stop.

I tried calling him and texting him for multiple hours and didn’t want to overstep any boundaries by just popping up at his home, so I gave up and eventually went home. That was two days ago and I still haven’t heard from him. He’s usually a very clingy and noisy person and always sends me small updates throughout the day, but I haven’t heard anything from him the entire time.

I’m so scared. I love this guy so much, he’s the sweetest and the single most interesting person I’ve ever met in my life. I know he has a lot of severe insecurity issues around his body, especially regarding his scarring. But it’s all gotten a lot better in recent months and he even began to love how hairy he is because it makes him feel euphoric.

Now I can’t help but feel like I took that away from him because of some stupid game. But at the same time, I don’t think it was fair for him to just up and leave without talking to me. We could’ve talked it out and I just wish he would communicate with me.

I already know I was a bit out of line for this, but I just tend to be uncomfortably honest. He knows this and loves me for it, so I’m confused why he’s THIS upset about this one. He’s never gone this long without talking to me.

Am I the asshole? I was just playing the game. I don’t think it’s fair to call me cruel for this just because other people are scared to be honest and say shit like they’d take away their partner’s mental illness. It’s so fake and that shit just pisses me off. Everyone has something they would change about their partner’s appearance.

[positivelyqueer]

hi to any teenagers who might be reading this. I’d like to give you one perspective on ‘it gets better’ as a very mentally ill queer trans twenty something.

I am no less mentally ill than I was as a high schooler. Differently sure but not less. I still struggle a lot. But I’m so much better at dealing with it. Life is no longer one long grey drudge. I’m not confined within it.

I continue to constantly grow and evolve. I learn new things about myself all the time. I lean into old hobbies. I dress how I want. I get piercings and tattoos. I understand what my autism is and treat myself kindly because of it. I trans my gender in new, fun and authentic ways.

And I have so much choice now. I can cover my bed in plush animals. I can buy floral bowls from second hand stores that remind me of my nan. I can eat dinosaur shaped pasta out of those bowls. I can make friends with so many people, not just the two or three dozen I was locked in with in my high school. I can try new hobbies. I can join clubs. I can decide one day I want to take the train to the beach. I can paint my light switch covers. I can volunteer. I can learn. This choice can be terrifying but it is also so so freeing.

I’m carving out the life I want to live, even if the only tool I have is my bloodied fingers. Please stay. It’s worth it. I promise.

[thepromptfoundry]

For June 2024, the Prompt Foundry is celebrating with Pride and Promptudice!

Different colors mean different things to different people, but for many the association between rainbows and queer community and pride is undeniable. Let's take some time to explore these colors, what they've meant historically, and what they mean to each of us now!

If you use this list, please tag me here @thepromptfoundry, I’d love to see your writing and art!

Feel free to combine different days' prompts with each other, or combine them with other seasonal events! Use your OCs, your favorite characters from media, your own experiences, whatever tickles your fancy.

Respond to as many prompts as you want or as interest you, don’t worry about missing or skipping any. Remember, this is supposed to be fun!

If you have any questions or musings, check our FAQ, and if you don't find your answer, shoot me an ask.

Plain text list below the cut:

1 Roses 2 Lipstick 3 Ruby Slippers 4 Oranges 5 Sunsets 6 Lemons 7 Wisdom 8 Green Carnations 9 The Forest 10 Turquoise Jewelry 11 Artemis 12 Bluejeans 13 Midnight 14 Lavender Marriage 15 Labrys 16 Sex 17 Life 18 Red Ribbons 19 Healing 20 Campfire 21 Sunlight 22 Gold Rings 23 Nature 24 Bow and Arrow 25 Magic 26 The Ocean 27 Serenity 28 The Lady of the Lake 29 Spirit 30 Royalty

[finxwrites]

strange & grimm, which btw sounds like an urban fantasy affectionately parodic hardboiled detective agency. probably queer.

It was a hot, muggy night in the Enchanted Forest. Everyone with a lick of sense was down in the fairy glens, hoping the Winter Court would put in an appearance and bring a breeze on with them. Lucky me, I’m the sucker who fingered the Snow Queen for the missing persons case last winter, so I’m persona non grata in the fairy glens these days.

Just as well. I couldn’t afford to leave the office, not when it’d been so long since my last case. Though on a night like this, I might as well not bother. It was too hot for crime. Even the leaves on the enchanted trees were drooping in the heat. 

I was just about to call it a night when a dame walked in my door. Tall, blonde, legs for days, with an air of tragedy that could put an unloved stepchild to shame. I looked her over suspiciously for any cheery woodland creatures hidden in her golden ringlets. If she was a princess, I’d turf her right back out of the office, case unheard. Princesses paid well, but they were more trouble than they were worth.

No mice poked their adorable little noses out of her pockets as the dame sank into a chair and fixed me with a hard look. “I hear you’re the best in the business,” she said without preamble. “And I need the best.”

I leaned back in my seat. “Baby, I’m the only one in the business. It’s not a good genre for private dicks.”

She rolled her eyes. “Oh, yes, far too child-friendly for any sort of dicks.” Before I could recover from that little gem, she went on, “It’s a child I’m here about. My sister. She’s…she’s gone missing.” She took a deep, shuddering breath. “Please, Detective, you’re my last hope. The royal courts won’t hear me out, they think she’s gone on the lam!”

I nodded grimly. “One of those Bo Peep situations, huh?” I get a depressing number of those. All it takes is one wolf in sheep’s clothing—you’d think the kids would learn.

The dame glared. There was enough cold iron in her gaze to put a fairy off her ambrosia. “On the lam, Detective. On the run. My sister has…something of a record.”

I raised my eyebrows. “Your sister the child? She some kind of crime prodigy?”

The dame fidgeted, looking away. “She’s…” She sighed explosively. “My sister is Goldilocks.”

I whistled, low and long. Crime prodigy indeed—Goldilocks was wanted in five kingdoms for the most impressive string of burglaries the Enchanted Forest had ever seen. No one could ever prove she’d done it, but the circumstantial evidence had piled up higher than mattresses on a pea. No wonder no royal court would take this case.

The dame’s shoulders hunched defensively, but she bulled on without trying to defend her wayward sister. “She’s gone missing, and I know it’s not another one of her sprees. Something is wrong this time.” She turned back to meet my eyes, her lovely features harsh with poorly-suppressed fear. “It’s her first crime come back to haunt her, I just know it is. They’ve always wanted revenge—especially the baby of the family, and he’s all grown up now. What they’d do if they got hold of her—“ She cut herself off with a watery gasp; her eyes were wet with tears. “Oh, it doesn’t bear thinking about!”

I handed her a handkerchief and gave her a minute to compose herself. It gave me a minute, too, to decide if I was really going to be this stupid. You don’t tangle with the big predators, not if you know what’s good for you, and especially not a whole family of them. Families are a dangerous thing in any genre.

But I was her last hope, and I’m a sucker for lost causes. And if I didn’t get paid soon, this business would become a lost cause itself. I said a silent farewell to my good sense as it packed its bags and left for kinder climes. “Alright,” I told the dame, “Give me the facts. We’ll see what kind of a story they tell.”

[nico-nico-suavecito]

And Still We Dance

in memory of everyone lost at Pulse on June 12, 2016 and in honor of the spaces in which queer joy flourishes

my first time clubbing was at a bar called tracks. because of its proximity to the train tracks, you could feel the rumble if not for the bass

i’d go with my childhood friend who danced like he was the only one in the room (which got us in trouble a few times) flailing his fists waving his arms like he had never danced before

it was there that he told me: you’ve been watching that girl all night. when are you going to talk to her?

it was there that i swallowed my fear crossed the swirling sea of bodies to ask her: do you want to dance and we danced that entire night like we were strobe lights unsure of how to be on and off each other at the same time

i never went with any intention to get off, so much as i went for a chance to leave my body on the dance floor. didn’t matter the music, even on those how many times can you play Titanium sort of nights.

and on those nights, i felt nothing like metal and more like the mist of hot breath refracting the night. trans and lucent enough to waltz with the spotlights.

i could dance sober then never had to take a hit to crackle electric light in the loafers without a single drink back when i could go to the gay bar without the thought of shots fired –

how many of us are mist these days?

and is this not our history the way we keep existing reviled in the way our bodies move with other bodies the way we move around the fist that tries to catch us

the other day, my friend and i pulled off a canyon road, the road we drive most nights when we feel our lives falling apart.

we seem to make this drive more often lately.

they showed me the spot where they told the truth for the first time to the moon and the mountains and the river below that they were as queer as the moon, the mountains and the river below.

we shouted into the echo our not so secrets knowing the wrong sort of people could hear us and do to us what lead does to flesh

but here we still are carving out space like wind carves a canyon

can you hear the train whistle can you hear the hum of a hundred phones looking for love on the other side

can you hear my pulse pounding like a bassline

----

my limited edition handmade poetry collection, the weeds grow anyway, is available for preorder. get your copy today.

[willthespy]

I’d love to see you draw Sam and Sebastian from Stardew Valley! It’s only a headcanon, but they’re adorable together

Pride Month Day 03 - Sebastian x Sam

“close enough! welcome back Solangelo!!” - me 2024

Oughh ty anon. I needed an excuse to draw sam cause I just started a new farm…I hope I did them justice

To anyone unaware (yes, here we go AGAIN), I take suggestions to draw a queer/trans/aro (lgbtq+) character or ship every day for pride month. Anyone can suggest any ship, character, etc. (headcanons or not.) No proshipping obviously. You can always request multiple times! Don’t hide your pride…

[tinytalkingtina]

Your Loss, My Gain

Rating M | WC 665 | Ao3 link

Tags: past Tommy/Eddie, first kisses, self-esteem, Gay Tommy/Eddie, Steve is some flavor of queer it's not important for this story what label he uses, established Steve/Eddie, possessive Steve, hurt/comfort, implied/referenced blow jobs and anal sex, use of the f slur

Written for the STWG Novembr 9th prompt "True hate's kiss" Thanks to steddiecamerarollgraphics for the divider

Steve shot straight up from the bed.

"Who?!?" Eddie shrugged. 

"Tommy H. The summer before my freshman year."

"What was that, 1980?” Steve asked, doing the math in his head quickly. “Shit, Tommy and I weren't even friends yet. Didn't know he ever talked to you before you started selling weed.”

Eddie blushed.

"When his family first moved here they were in the trailer park for a year before his dad came off of active duty. We spent a lot of time running around together. It's just…” He picked at a loose thread on the blanket. 

“One day he was upset we were going to different schools in the fall, kept saying I was gonna forget him. He looked so sad, I couldn't stand it anymore. Just kinda-" He gave the quickest peck to Steve’s lips. “And told him I couldn’t forget my first kiss.”

“Oh. What'd he do when you did it?"

Eddie curled up and put his head in Steve’s lap.

"Kissed me back for a second before he punched me in the face, called me a fag, and threatened that I'd better not touch him ever again or else he’d beat the shit out of me.”

Steve stroked Eddie’s hair. It had the desired effect when some of the tension left his boyfriend’s shoulders, and Eddie closed his eyes as he continued:

“Never gave him a reason to worry after that. By the time he got to high school too I’d already joined Hellfire and found new friends, and he was busy with basketball and swimming. So it’s not like we crossed paths much. Least ’til I started dealing.”

Steve remembered how insistent Tommy had been to go put up with “the Freak” alone at any party where Eddie showed up.

“When he bought weed off you, did he…” he asked carefully. Eddie barked out a hollow laugh.

“Yeah, yeah he’d have no problem with me touching him when he was drunk off his ass, and him and Carol had broken up for what, the fifth time that year? Had it down to a choreographed dance: We’d make out for a bit then he’d push me down to the ground, ‘cause it’s totally fine to get a blow job from another guy. It’s not gay if you’re not the one on your knees you know.”

Steve felt wetness on his leg.

“And the worst thing? I let him do it. Every single fucking time. Didn’t have enough respect to shove him away. Figured this ‘true hate’s kiss’ shit I got from Tommy was the best I was gonna get so might as well take the stupid scraps of affection he bothered throwing my way. Not like there was anyone else lined up to take his place.”

Steve waited until his boyfriend’s breathing evened out before speaking up.

“Hey.” He tilted Eddie’s face until he could see his red rimmed eyes. “Fuck Tommy.”

That startled a laugh out of him.

“Sweetheart, I love topping for you when the mood strikes us, but I really would prefer not to fuck another closeted guy for the rest of my life.”

Steve laughed and scooped Eddie up in his arms.

“Please, like I would want to share you with anyone else. Really, fuck him for trying to have it both ways, and fuck that town that convinced you to give up.”

Before Eddie, Steve had always tried to squash the little voice in his head that insisted he go all out and show how badly he wanted. But now, as he held Eddie tight, he didn’t mind letting the little voice out.

“You’re mine.” 

He was going to keep Eddie for the rest of his life. And the crazy thing was, he was pretty sure Eddie wanted the same thing, judging by the awestruck expression and blush on his face whenever Steve got possessive like this.

“Your loss Tommy,” Steve thought as he ducked down to kiss Eddie. He was going to keep his happy ending.

Author's notes -You can't convince me that sports-obsessed Steve isn't good at math -Read another story that made Tommy's family a military one and rather liked the idea, so I decided to add that in here too

On a personal level, this was an awful week where I spent a lot of time in hospitals/a funeral home. This had been mostly written before that all happened, and I wasn't sure if I should post it. Managed to find a moment to feel comfortable sitting down and finishing it, so I'm just gonna put it up as is for now.

[aziraphales-library]

Hello!

Do you have any bookbinder Aziraphale/ gardener Crowley human au's??

Thank you!

The only fic I know of and can find that is specifically book restorer Aziraphale and gardener Crowley is the very popular and well-known...

Petrichor & Parchment by MrsNoggin (E)

“Mr. Crowley, I presume?” Aziraphale asked in lieu of an introduction, which was not forthcoming. The guy hadn’t even removed his sunglasses. Oh God, he had a tattoo on his face. Aziraphale wasn’t one to judge, but… what kind of gardener had a snake tattoo on his face?

But here are some gardener Crowley fics in which Aziraphale works with books in one way or another...

The Easter Petting Zoo by MM2022 (G)

“Didn’t you hold a duckling?” “Er,” said Aziraphale, looking up from where he was kneeling on the ground, trying to entice to most energetic of the kids frolicking around to get into his lap (he watched it attempt to climb a resting sheep earlier, and then the hay feeder, certainly his knees wouldn’t be much of a stretch?), and promptly losing his gift of speech. Addressing him was one of the animal handlers, the gorgeous red-haired man Aziraphale noticed as soon as he walked up to the mobile pen. Whickber Street Shopkeepers and Traders Association brings in a petting zoo for Easter, and bookseller Aziraphale stops by. A human AU meet-cute.

Turn To Face The Sun by his_infinitevariety (G)

Five times Crowley watches Aziraphale picking flowers, and one time Aziraphale is given flowers by Crowley.

Please Stay by curiouswriterkr (E)

Did the angel just insinuate-? Crowley grinned at him. Might as well take the invitation. “Well, I’d love to hear it one day over a glass of wine, then,” the gamble worked because Aziraphale beamed and wiggled. His lips parted and his eyes focused on Crowley’s sunglasses. “That would be delightful, Crowley,” his name rolled off Aziraphale’s tongue like it was a delicious chocolate raspberry truffle. In short, Crowley moves in next door to Aziraphale and sparks fly. And then so much miscommunication begins to happen and assumptions are made and things get very rocky indeed. (Because sometimes these two share a brain cell.)

Almost Heaven by pilatesandpinot (E)

English literature professor Azra Fell finally decides to go on sabbatical for a semester. If he were smart, he’d probably spend his time in the Mediterranean, go hiking across Europe or America, or perhaps learn the power of prayer and meditation. Instead, he settles into a seaside town called Abel’s Point, also known as “Almost Heaven”, hoping some time away from London will help him rejuvenate and write his memoir. Little does he know that the town will prove more than he bargained for. Not to mention his next door neighbor, Anthony Crowley, who happens to be the most flirtatious yet neurotic man in town.

and now all of my garden is grown in lavender by ilikeblue (E)

Popular queer romance author, A.Z. Fell, has been lying about having a husband and a happy marriage for years. Longing to escape a string of failed relationships and looking for a fresh start, Aziraphale moves into the cottage left to him by his Great Aunt Agnes. When a TV adaptation of one of his books leads to sudden popularity and throws him into the limelight, his fans (and the press) are eager to catch a glimpse of Aziraphale's own mysterious leading man. Unfortunately, he still has to cast someone for that role. Enter the handsome gardener… Under Crowley's meticulous care the cottage's neglected garden slowly comes back to life, and Aziraphale finds himself writing the most important love story he'll ever write: his own

- Mod D

[lotties-ashwagandha]

SHOKO HEADCANONS! (sfw and nsfw). sugar mommy shoko vibes to an extent, it just happened :) fem!reader implied.

SFW

⬦ after a long day of work, shoko is exhausted. she’s given so much of her energy to patients, to paperwork, to caring for everyone but herself. when she comes home to you, all she wishes for is to be held by you. she loves quiet evenings with you, quiet dinners and chamomile tea with honey and reading together wrapped in one another’s arms.

⬦ on her days off, shoko loves peaceful, romantic dates with you. taking you out to bakeries and coffee shops, or out shopping for any clothes you want. there’s no window shopping with shoko, she has enough money that if you take so much as a second glance at something then you’re inevitably going home with it. she especially loves buying you jewelry, necklaces and bracelets that serve as subtle signs of her on you.

⬦ BOOK STORE OR LIBRARY DATES!!!!! you can’t tell me this woman isn’t the most nerdy book obsessed queer ever in her free time. i’d like to say she reads mystery/suspense or horror, but realistically i think she would try to live permanently in the non fiction section. in any case, the two of you leave with heavy as fuck bags of books every time you go to a book store. you make her read your favorites that you’ve gotten together, and she makes you read hers.

NSFW (under the cut)

⬦ dom!shoko, who is either so soft with you or so rough with you depending on how she’s feeling. after a hard day at work she needs to fuck you hard, bury her strap in you and slap you and put you in handcuffs. she’ll heal the marks on your wrists if they’re rubbed by the cuffs, but she’ll leave the hickeys on your neck and chest as they are.

⬦ the jewelry i mentioned that she buys you — she loves to fuck you in it. she wants to see your back arch and feel your body tense under her while the diamond necklace she bought you hangs around your neck. she wants to pull your hair and catch a flashing view of the new earrings you picked out and used her money to pay for, and wants to hear the jangling of your bracelets when you clutch at her at the edge of an orgasm.

⬦ shoko pulls you into her office at work, or into an empty alley, or into the backseat of her car when she wants you. she doesn’t care where the two of you are, just that she can use you wherever she wants to.

my first official jjk post 🥹 dedicated to @webism for getting me into jjk, i’m writing a fluffy fic for you later to show my gratitude not just headcanons SORRY

[canichangemyblogname]

I’d personally like to know what fandom they’re in because every third day since May of this year, I have been subjected to takes that include statements like:

Tommy will cheat on Buck because gay men cheat.

Tommy will give Buck an STI because gay men sleep around.

I hope Tommy dies of AIDS.

Tommy is homophobic for dating Buck instead of a “femme twink bottom.”

If I were Buck, I’d have killed Tommy for flirting with me.

If you like Buck x Tommy, you’re just a fetishizer. Even if you’re a queer man. I said what I said.

We should stone Tommy.

M/M romantic relationships have always centered women.

Temu is a predator for dating a grown man who’s younger then him.

Jakey only wants Buck for his body and youth because gay men are shallow and superficial.

Which crime makes you want to execute Tteokbokki the most? Cutting a date short or calling a man by his given name?

Gay men are never actually gay; they just think they are. They actually like women, but don’t realize it or are lying.

Men like T*mmy should be beheaded for flirting with men the way he has with Buck.

Tommy is such a typical gay man, forcing himself on Buck in his loft and turning him gay.

Gay men are all liars, so I don’t expect Buck to put up with Tommy long.

Stereotypes about gay men obvi come from somewhere, and that’s real life! I have good cause to think Tommy will be bad for Buck as a gay man!

Buck’s not actually into men; Tommy is your typical man and pressured/coerced Buck into a relationship.

Tommy and Buck dating makes light of women’s relationship trauma.

Someone needs to tell Buck that he’s actually in love with his best friend!

The gayest thing to ever happen to Buck isn’t kissing a man or the implication he’s had sex with that man, but the one time he told his best friend he’d beat him up.

Buck x Tommy is problematic because they’re both men.

Tommy is a pedo because queer people prey on children and a teen in the show called him “cool” off-screen.

Any number of takes calling fans of 911’s recent decision to expand queer representation by including a same-sex male couple “bummies” or “bummers” << UK queer people have told y’all to knock it off. It’s a slur.

Also any number of takes saying that Buck & Tommy’s relationship feels “off-putting,” “creepy,” “gross,” “weird,” “nauseating,” or “obscene”

If you flirt with men like Tommy, you’re a predator. Simple.

Tommy is a freak and a fetishizer.

Relationships are only meaningful and worthwhile if it’s a slow burn and you more friends for the better part of a decade first.

I think this queer guy is secretly in love with and pining for his (straight) best friend.

Queer guys and straight guys can’t be friends; the attraction gets in the way.

Buck is going to cheat on Tommy because Tommy’s old and has a low libido and Buck’s a bisexual slut.

Tommy is grooming Buck!

So, yeah, I’d like to know what fandom you’re in where people are being homophobic to real queer people for *not* liking Tommy, because all I’ve seen is people literally sending death threats and CSAM fics to queer people—often specifically targeting queer men—who support 911’s newest canon queer couple. It has been MONTHS of targeted harassment. Months. I’d like to know WHO these people are who are harassing queer people in the name of defending a “homophobic queer character,” and then I’d like to know how that character is homophobic.

Please—I beg—tell me how Tommy is a “homophobic” gay man. How is he anything like the self-proclaimed “homophobic gay men” of buddieblr? Do tell. Without relying on any tropes about gay men being predatory. Because the only reason y’all think he is and can and would “groom” or “prey upon” a grown man is based in very popular irl queerphobic stereotypes about queer men. Y’all have spent the last five months essentially saying: “I want to subject this fictional character to violence because of real life false conceptions about men like him.”

[a-dragons-journal]

i don’t think my words hold much value to people like you, and i don’t think you would be willing to listen or take it to heart, but it’s still worth trying. i would like you to realise that you are human in every way. you are not an animal, you are not a dragon. (you probably already know this. maybe you’re in denial. i don’t know) either way, none of you would actually be willing to give it even a second of thought because you’re insecure about yourself, and you’re insecure because you know you’re human. i assure you that you will not reach full personal contentment until you live out your life without pretending to be a mythical creature. wtv have a good day

Ooh, I haven’t gotten one of these asks in a few years.

So I ask this, and every other question I will follow up with, completely genuinely, and if you’re willing to really get into the weeds discussing it I’d love to do so (though I’ll probably reblog any follow-ups to my other blog): why do you think you know me and my experiences better than I do?

Why do you think you can armchair diagnose me with insecurity? What evidence do you actually have for that, besides the fact that I’m nonhuman? What evidence do you have that I’m not already content and fulfilled in my life?

Is it possible that identifying as nonhuman is unrelated to those things entirely, and you’re making a false assumption?

I get it. It looks crazy, when you’re completely new to the concept. It’s weird - it is! But pause and listen to us when we talk about our experiences for a moment.

For many of us, myself included, finding nonhumanity is a moment of suddenly understanding - of pieces falling into place, of my life experiences suddenly making sense. Awakening is something that made me more content and fulfilled, not less - there’s a sadness in it sometimes, yes, but so too is there the comfort of understanding yourself in a new way, of realizing, oh. I’m not just weird. There’s not something wrong with me. There are other people like me.

(If this sounds a lot like the experience of figuring out you’re queer, there’s a reason for that.)

To use myself as an example of the flaws in your hypothesis: there’s… honestly not much dissatisfaction with my life right now. I’ve got a stable job with decent income. I’d like to be able to cut back my hours a bit, but that will come in time. I’ve got enough free time as it is to do my art and play my tabletop games with friends in my off time. I’ve got family and friends around me. Sure, I miss my wings, but I’m hoping to pick up powered paragliding in the near future and hoping that’ll scratch that itch at least somewhat. I’m doing pretty well, honestly. This isn’t the case for all otherkin, but it’s not the case for all orthohumans (people who aren’t alterhuman in any way) either. What it does indicate, however, is that your hypothesis that being otherkin inherently means you’re insecure and unhappy with your life is false, or at minimum flawed - if it were true, I wouldn’t exist.

So, I ask again: why do you think you understand my own experiences better than I do? And moreover, why does it bother you so much that I am the way I am?

The name for the thing you’re doing here, intentionally or not, is concern trolling - trying to push me out of an identity by professing concern for problems that don’t exist. Why? Why are you going out of your way to tell other people they’re wrong about their own identity? Why is your reaction, when you see an identity you don’t understand, to decide it’s unhealthy, or just make-believe, or whatever, and then to make that the problem of the people who identify that way? What exactly makes you think this is inherently unhealthy?

Would it not be better to devote that energy to trying to understand us, instead of trying to change us?

You don’t have to answer these questions to me, obviously, but I do encourage you to answer them to yourself at least. Pick apart your worldview for a minute and see if it actually holds up under scrutiny - it’s good for you, and mental enrichment to boot! If you are willing to really get into the weeds of this discussion with me, again, I’d love to do that - I love having discussions like this, and it’s good for me to have my worldview challenged every so often too! Please, genuinely, pick at the flaws in my logic if you see them - if it can be pulled apart under scrutiny, it needs to be pulled apart and rebuilt. No one on the internet is obligated to let a stranger do that, obviously, but personally I enjoy it - it’s a meat pumpkin for me - so let’s talk, if you’re up for it. It’s been a hot minute since I’ve gotten a good interesting antikin to debate with.

[munsonkitten]

cw: sexual discussions, gender dysphoria (trans Eddie Munson pov), virgin Eddie, mentions of period typical transphobia and homophobia

It comes as a bit of a surprise, when Steve comes out to Eddie as gay. Even more of a surprise when Steve follows it up with and I’m attracted to you. Eddie has to remind him, with clenched teeth, bracing for the impact of rejection, that he doesn’t have the parts Steve wants. 

“You think I care what’s in your pants, man? You’re hot, either way. I’m just saying, like, I’d fuck you,” Steve says, blowing smoke into the air in front of him. He’s sitting against the side of Eddie’s bed, hogging the joint Eddie rolled for them both. “I’m also, like, really fucking high. So forget I said all that.”

Eddie reaches over the edge of his bed and snatches the joint back before Steve can bring it to his mouth again. 

He takes a hit, letting the smoke fill his lungs while he ruminates on, well, all of that. 

“You sure you’re gay?” Eddie asks, settling on that question first. He winces as he says it, his own internal hangups taking hold of him. He knows he’s a man, there’s no doubt about that. He’s been validated to hell and back by Wayne, a bunch of older queers Wayne is friends with, and the one doctor in the state of Indiana that has shown him any kind of compassion. 

He just knows how other people are. How, despite him knowing who he is, a lot of people just see him for his cunt and his tits. Well, not like he has much of his tits left, not after the demobats performed a botched mastectomy on him and left him with one and a half breasts. The doctors that put him back together wouldn’t remove the rest. He knows that Steve could just be getting some wires crossed — yes, he could be attracted to Eddie, but Eddie has to ask if it’s really because he’s into men and sees Eddie as a man, or if… If it’s the alternative. 

“Pretty sure, man,” Steve answers. He tilts his head back over the edge of the bed and looks at Eddie, where he’s lying against his pillows. “Like, I don’t think about,” he waves vaguely at Eddie’s body, and Eddie knows he’s being careful, like he can’t just talk about him without overthinking each word. “I think about, like, how you pinned me to a wall with a bottle to my throat and I think about how you hotwired that RV. I was definitely into you during both of those things, and I had no idea about, you know.”

And that’s true. Eddie’s been hiding it pretty good since he moved to town. Buzzed his head in his bathroom the day his dad got arrested. Had a pretty good feeling his pops wasn’t coming back from this one before he even left. Usually he took Eddie along with him, but that final time he left him with a pile of change and a phone number and told him to call Wayne if he wasn’t back by the next afternoon.

Wayne took one look at him when he showed up, asked him about the buzzcut, asked him what name he was going by these days, and then took him to meet some friends. Didn’t even have time to meet any other kids before he started getting tips from an older trans man that Wayne met years back. Since then, Eddie kept his head down, his chest bound, and never uttered a sound until he got on testosterone and his voice started to deepen and crack along with all the other boys. 

“Okay, well now you do know, so,” Eddie points out. He shrugs, takes another hit and then passes the joint back down to Steve. “You’d really fuck me? Pussy and all?”

“I mean, I’ve got experience with it,” Steve says. “I just don’t like women, is all. You’re not a woman.”

Eddie doesn’t really get it. How Steve can go from Hawkins’ biggest lady killer to lounging on Eddie the freak Munson’s dingy bedroom floor saying he doesn’t like ladies at all. Steve Harrington, who, and it’s no secret, called Jonathan Byers a queer a few years ago and laughed when his slimy friends called other boys fags. Yet here he is, saying that Eddie’s a man. So much of a man that Steve says he’s gay and wants to fuck him in the same breath.

It doesn’t make any fucking sense. 

“What about you?” Steve asks. “Would you?”

“Would I what?”

“Fuck me,” Steve clarifies. “Want to get fucked by me. I mean, hey if you’ve got a dick laying around, I’d let you put it in me, too. I don’t think I’m picky.”

Eddie sighs, dropping his head down to his pillow. This is where it gets tricky. Yeah, he’d have sex with Steve Harrington. Who wouldn’t? But as much experience as Steve has with pussy, Eddie’s a pussy with no experience. Other than a few drunken kisses in dark clubs eighty miles from home, he’s completely terrified of putting himself out there, and honestly for good reason too. 

Being gay in this town is hard enough, but if anyone finds out he’s trans, he’s fucking done for. It was scary enough realizing Steve knows, and he didn’t even have a choice in Steve finding out. Next time he tries to die, he’s gonna make sure he gets to a hospital instead of getting his clothes cut off on Steve’s parents’ bathroom floor. 

But yeah, Steve knows, and there’s no more risk of him finding out, and that’s pretty much the main reason Eddie hasn’t had sex with anyone, so. 

“Yeah, I guess,” he answers. 

“Cool,” Steve whispers. 

And that’s it. That’s all the conversation is. 

Steve crawls into Eddie’s bed and curls up beside him like they always do when he sleeps over, and he takes the joint from Eddie to take one last hit. He reaches over Eddie to put it in the ashtray and then lays back down.

“So, um,” Eddie says. Because he’s confused. He thought Steve was coming onto him. He thought this was a precursor for Steve coming in him. 

“What’s up?” Steve asks lazily, voice catching on a yawn. 

“Well, I’m glad we established all that, but, like… Are we not going to…?”

“What? Oh, no. I’m way too high,” Steve whispers, turning his face into Eddie’s shoulder. “Another time?”

Eddie laughs because he has no idea how his life became this. 

“Sure,” Eddie agrees. “Another time.”

Steve sits up, presses a loud, smacking kiss to Eddie’s temple, and then drops his head back down. He turns his face in toward Eddie’s neck, arm finding its place around Eddie’s waist. Eddie can’t see his face, but he thinks Steve’s pleased smile might just match his own. 

Read More on AO3

[piratefishmama]

Fake it till you Make it | Part 20

So now, he was sat in a car, with a rich older man.

To some little queer boys, this would be a dream come true, especially since the older man wasn’t half bad in terms of looks, that all American square jaw, strong nose, the works. Plus… rich.

But this wasn’t a rich older man whisking him away, no, this was Steve Harrington’s regularly absent father taking him grocery shopping.

It’d been a wild day.

“So…” Eddie didn’t do well with silence. Silence never sat right with him. Had to fill it somehow, be it with silly noises, random singing, or conversation with any person in his vicinity. “They uhm, they do that often?”

“It’s a family thing, I think we’re all as bad as each other.” At least he was self-aware, the eldest Harrington still watching the road as they drove through the small town, he knew where he was going though, each turn done as if he’d driven the route enough to do it blindfolded. “Lynda’s a lawyer so, that should explain that” loved being right, it was her job to be right, even if she was actually wrong, she had to make out like she was right and she did it well. “I’m a middle child” explained both everything and nothing at all, “and Steven… I think he got a little bit of both of us. I’d have thought you’d be used to that though, since you’re dating him.”

“Ah-haha, I mean… don’t get me wrong, I’ve always known about Steve’s uhm… how to phrase this… mean girl streak?” John snorted a little laugh, emboldened, Eddie continued, “he’s like everyone’s disappointed mother, always with the little—” Eddie shifted in his seat, just about managing to put his hands on his hips and cock them weirdly in place “pose that he does when he’s oh so very disappointed in you. I used to thrive on it back in high school, whenever he’d catch Tommy H or the other basketball goons bullying the kids, he’d just stand there like he’d caught his kids with their hands in the cookie jar, an they’d actually just… cower, like he could actually do anything to them. It was the funniest shit I’d ever seen.”

It'd actually been quite the surprise when that’d happened the first time, it didn’t happen often, Steve had been a douchebag, not the ‘shove your head in a toilet’ kind of douchebag, or the ‘shove Gareth in a locker’ kind of douchebag.

No, he was the mega bitch douchebag who could flash a smile and drop every set of panties in his immediate vicinity, he was the douchebag who KNEW he could do that. Who carried himself high with the knowledge, lording it over everyone without… ever actually lording it, it was a presence kind of thing. An attitude.

And maybe, occasionally, he’d have been the douchebag who didn’t really see anyone unless he wanted to see them, didnt really pay any attention to those not on his radar, those not in his friend group, which led to many an accidental shoulder check, which had in turn led to Eddie’s own personal little vendetta because he’d lost one of his prized mini figs to the underside of the Hawkins High trophy case when Steve had walked by a little too close and shoved him just hard enough to send Eddie’s shit flying.

Had just kept walking as if he hadn’t even seen him. Asshole.

It was only when he’d first been seen hanging around Wheeler that his personality had shifted toward something reasonably human. Thanks Wheeler, the sacrifice of your time and patience hath created a god among men.

“So he was never… bad then?”

“Nah” no sense bad mouthing the boyfriend, that wouldn’t get him anywhere. “Real Prince Charming in a perfectly pressed polo shirt. He’s amazing, sir… you have nothing to worry about with Steve, he’s… one in a million.” Now anyway.

“Good. Good.” And then he fell silent, the quiet stretch lasting nearly five minutes with only the faint music playing on low volume from the radio to fill that silence, until the eldest Harrington pulled the car into a quiet carpark, and parked. “Here we are!” Oh thank Christ.

“We can't keep doing this.” Steve was the first one to speak up during their mutual living room silent treatment, finally looking at this mother after nearly an hour of watching a gentle snowfall that’d started outside. He hoped it wouldn't get heavier before Eddie got back.

“I have no idea what you—”

“Mom.” Steve cut her off, his eyes sharp and tone firm. “We can’t keep doing this. This bickering, this who’s right who’s wrong shit, we’ve gotta stop, at least here.” If not for their own sanity, but for the image he was giving Eddie of his family life.

Of what he might possibly maybe be getting himself into if Steve could actually swing a real relationship by the end of the week. The chances of him saying yes were already pretty farfetched, but if Steve’s parents were their worst selves…

Why would Eddie want to subject himself to that long term?

She paused, expression unreadable, something she’d mastered years ago for the court room, then she sighed. “I know, Steven.” She sighed heavily “Sometimes I forget that you’re a grown up now, that you can argue right back and actually stand your ground.” It only felt like yesterday when he was tugging uncomfortably at the little bowtie they used to make him wear for special occasions, all dressed up looking up at them with those big hazel eyes of his. His childhood only felt like yesterday. “I miss when you were cute and just did as you were told” she sniffled. Back when his parents had been there regularly before their duties had pulled them away. Before distance had strained them and they missed everything. Steve rolled his eyes but said nothing as his mother continued “Anyway, i agree. I think I’d prefer it if Eddie didn’t go away from this trip thinking John to be the most mature of us.”

“God, could you imagine?” Steve shook his head to free himself of the truly harrowing thought, allowing the subject to change. “I really like him, Mom... I didn’t expect to at first, not enough to want something long term with him anyway...” He’d thought it’d be easy to just pretend with him at first, but Eddie just had this... thing about him, Steve didn’t really know how to explain it, he just felt like home. Maybe it should have been alarming as to how fast that’d happened but... Steve had always rushed into things, funnily enough he didn’t think Eddie minded. “So I’d really like it if he liked all of us by the end of this, an if he only likes Dad cause of our bullshit, I think I might just disown the both of you.” The last part said in jest but... god he’d never let it go.

He’d lockjaw it until the end of time, would take it out on special occasions and shake it in their faces like look what you did. Look at what you cost me.

“Honestly, sweetheart I think I’d disown myself.” Lynda laughed, the air finally lightening up a little between them. “Here, how about we go see if the maintenance men pilfered the wine cellar? I’m positive Mags was hiding a damn good red down there among the cabernet that I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t want to go to waste...”

“Well... we probably should check it... just in case, y’know? For security reasons.” Not that he actually doubted the integrity of the maintenance crew, they’d been employees for years, they’d known his grandparents, had worked for them in their later years when time had started to catch up to them, and a steady gig passing through generations wasn’t something to scoff at.

“Security, absolutely.” But then, the contents of the wine cellar alone was probably worth more than the actual house, so… better double check.

For security reasons.

Part 22