#I want to win not babysit
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I'm scared about the future and I want to talk to you (Lyon roster thoughts)
Look at me branching out from using Taylor Swift lyrics. Everyone is capable of growth.
Or are they? Not if we look at Lyon's roster as of today, and it's something I want to talk about.
I've said it before and I'll say it again - I positively hate the argument "we need to give the academy kids a chance so we can see what they can do." No, we don't. It's not up to Lyon to give academy players a chance, not if they want to be a competitive UWCL team. The two cannot go together. You cannot be both a development club and a UWCL contender. I can drop the bar even more - you cannot be both a development club and a title contender.
Titles are won by experience. They are won because players have been there before and they know how to win, they know how to deal with pressure and expectations and everything that comes along with playing in a high-stakes game. Those very same high-stake games are won by players who already know what it takes to win. They know because they have been there before.
Academy kids have not.
It's just such a weak - and borderline offensive - argument to say, well they've showed what they can do in training, they should be able to get some game minutes because of that. Why? If an academy player "shows interesting things" in training, what is to say they should play in a competitive game and be a difference maker? We've already had this conversation, we already know what happens when academy kids are put in a high stakes game with actual consequences, and the answer is Lyon loses the game.
In order to be the best you have to be able to compete, and academy kids just aren't on the level yet. Now, could they be in the future, maybe. Sure. But it's not up to Lyon to find out if an academy kid can or cannot make it, not if they want to win titles. As I said, you cannot be both a development club and a title contender. If you accuse me of being too harsh - go on, find me a team who has won the UWCL with a focus academy players. Find me a team who wins their league by putting an emphasis on academy players.
The lack of competitive recruitment is genuinely concerning to me. It's borderline a professional foul to have let a player like Leuchter gone to PSG. Losing Cascarino to the San Diego Wave is understandable because of Cascarino being on the record of always wanting to play overseas, losing Mbock to PSG and pretending that Sylla, arguably the most injury prone player bar Christen Press, is a suitable replacement is not.
Lyon is one injury crisis away of being forced to play in a back three because of Carpenter having no genuine competition/rotation at RB, Renard and Gilles' covers being Sylla and Sombath, and Bacha being mentally on a different team and/or Svava being, well, Svava. How that doesn't give more people sleep paralysis is beyond me. If we thought September - December 2022 was bad, that makeshift back line of 2022 will seem elite compared to a worse case scenario with the current team.
The midfield is also a genuine cause for concern. Marozsan is still with the team for reasons no one quite understands. Van de Donk for all intent and purposes is most likely gone in 2025. That brief hour when there were rumors of Majri going to Inter Milan was the best hour of my life, the rumor being shut down was the worst emotional crash I've had in a long time. Mendy is an academy kid. Horan is coming off arguably her worse season. Dabritz, when fit, is an incredible player, the issue is she is injury prone. Damaris has yet to play an entire season without being injured.
And I don't care what the Twitter fan girls say, Benyahia is not Lyon's savior. Did she have a good season with Le Havre? Yes, she did. But again I cannot for the life of me understand why people are so eager to pretend that Le Havre was not in a relegation battle for probably 80 percent of the season. Saving a team from relegation does not automatically transform you into the Savior of Lyon's Midfield.
"Oh but we need to give her a chance to see what she can do!" Do we though? I understand the state of Lyon's midfield is dire - I think any real Lyon fan can and should admit that - but that does not automatically mean she should saunter into a starting lineup. Lyon is not (yet?) Le Havre. The standards and expectations are not the same. One good season in a relegation battle team does not, or at least should not, translate into an automatic starter position.
The attack isn't much better. We don't know when we will get Hegerberg back. Chawinga has to learn an entirely new system. Diani's head space is a work in progress. My stance on Vicki Becho is well documented by now. Le Sommer has talent but not speed. We need younger talent in front line, we needed a player like Leuchter and instead let her go to a direct rival. Liana Joseph might have talent but we are back to where we started: Lyon cannot afford to be both a development team and a UWCL contender.
if Michele Kang wants Lyon to succeed, she needs to put an actual emphasis on recruiting top players. But in order to do so, she also needs to remember Lyon exists.
Right now Lyon is in a crisis with a mediocre coach who seems content on coasting with players he doesn't know what to do with. Not that it really matters, anyway - Lyon doesn't even have a home stadium yet, so maybe fans won't even be forced to witness a catastrophic self-implosion anyway.
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theres nothing i want more than for an older millennial couple to adopt me and my boyfriend i want to be friends with two millennials so badly
#imagine theres a couple who are in their early 30s#the man is a techbro but not in the annoying cryptofascist way just in the i work in the tech industry way#and the lady is a quirked up autistic housewife who obsesses over video game franchises and has 100 ocs#and they have that cringeworthy yet oddly charming millennial humor to them where theyre always using reddit catchphrases#fucked around and found out!#play stupid games win stupid prizes!#ERMAGERD!#that kinda stuff#and we'd have dinners at each others houses#but mostly the millennial couple's house cuz they actually own their own house and we're just renters#they could tell us about idk their animal crossing island and what episode of friends they're rewatching#and we could tell them about the intricacies of the plot of one piece and what new skins we got in fortnite#and we'd all be slightly confused about the other's interests but we'd still respect our love for nerdy shit#and whenever we take selfies they post the pictures to their facebook because to them facebook is still a viable form of social media#and the captions are like 'babysitting these dweebs!!' to poke fun at the slight age difference#and me and bf would make comments like 'i'm gonna put you in a nursing home soon' in retaliation#and we'd have a cool discord server where we play minecraft together. because that is the one thing all generations can agree on#which is that discord and minecraft are just kinda epic#that's all i want. is that so wrong
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I'm so damn happy about the sims infants! 😭 They're even better than I thought they'd be! Now I can play all kinds of new stories with them & the dlc.
#I love babies so much lol#I always always played with them on the previous sims games#but the kids on sims 4 are so boring honestly I never enjoyed them#this is diff tho#theyre soo cute and I love how they develop 😭#maybe now Ill actually enjoy family gameplay#I dont want kids irl thats too much responsibility for me tho idm babysitting#so getting to have all the fun w none of the responsibility via games is like#ultimate win :D#sunny speaks#tw children#tw babies#cw babies#cw children
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We Neva Play!
Synopsis. Turns out, the “r” in rivals stands for “really good séx” when a mission becomes a little too hot to handle.
Pairing. Gojo Satoru x Reader
Content. MDNI, fem! reader, rivals-to-lovers, séx pollen, innappropríate use of jujutsu (like a LOT), pússydrunk Gojo, limitless, both are teachers, creampíes, oraI (fem), síxty-nine, banter, breaking the bed, FÉRAL Gojo, pússy-slappíng, BRÉEDING, spítting, reader’s CT mentioned, Yaga’s had enough, pet names, swearing.
Word count. 6.3k (cries)
A/N. Lacked Gojo in the manga so I present to you more Gojo <3
“Gojo, I will kill you before that curse can-”
“Aw, man!‘ Yuji whines over Nobara’s cackles, reluctantly slapping a few thousand yen onto her outstretched palm. He thuds his head frustratedly against the cool vending machine they were crouched behind, “That was rigged!”
The girl scoffs, counting her hard-earned winnings victoriously, “I told you they wouldn’t even make it until the school gates before fighting. It’s not rigged, it’s common sense - not that you’d know anything about it.” Satisfied, she sneaks a look over the side of the machine at the shrinking backs of you and a too-happy Gojo Satoru. “Besides, we’ll get a rematch soon enough. My money’s on her, double or nothin’.”
“You really think they’ll kill each other before the mission is over?” Yuji muses, eyes locked on Gojo’s infamous smirk - only widening the closer he drives you dangerously towards an aneurysm. “I bet-”
“No.” Megumi’s deadpan interruption startles them both. And as much as he’d like to pretend he wasn’t cramped with the two idiots stalking their squabbling teachers, he unfortunately, very much, was. “I bet ten thousand yen they kill each other before the mission is over. Or worse - end up dating.”
---
“A love hotel.”
“A love hotel~” Gojo echoes, with a hand clutching faintly at his chest. Swooning over you with each word, “Now, usually you’d have to take me out to dinner first, but for you I will make an except- mmpf-”
Now, Gojo knew he could’ve easily blocked your attack - hell, he didn’t even have to bat an eye to activate limitless. But where was the fun in that? Giving into your elbow digging sharply into his side, he’s only cackling at your venomous words, “I could take down both you and those special grades, y’know?”
“Oh yeah?” he hooks a long finger underneath his blindfold, showing off that infuriating wiggle of his snowy brows. “If you’re so great, then why did Yaga have you assigned with me, pretty girl?”
You sigh, rubbing your throbbing temples, “Only because someone-” And oh, if he had the most renowned eyes in all of jujutsu, then you had the most withering glare. “-completely skipped out on his last mission to stuff his face with sweets, n’ now I’m wasting my time babysitting. So this time, I’m in charge.”
Ah, a woman after his heart - in more ways than one, for sure.
“Yes, ma’am~”
Dramatically, he mimics the zipping of his lips shut, readily following you towards the flashy building standing out amongst the bustling Tokyo street. Walls painted such a suggestive pink, neon lights flickering special discounts at passersby - it would have almost been scandalous to be caught outside such an obvious love hotel such as this - if it hadn’t been for the mission, that is.
“Didn’t think our first date would be at a love hotel.” he chuckles as soon as you reach the gaudy, perfumed reception. And that flickering, wide-eyed stare of the woman behind the counter is enough for Gojo to prattle on, “Now, tell me what room you want, honey-” Throwing an arm around your shoulder, you’re pressed helplessly against his toned front. “-they’ve got candy-themed, anime-themed- oh, they’ve even got a train station-”
“Best to keep our train station fantasies to ourselves-” You simper, subtly stepping on his foot with your own, but that only topples you against him. Instantly, another strong arm snakes around your waist to support your weight, as if second nature, “-isn’t that right, dear?”
And you swear, you could spot a tiny dimple when the ends of his mouth curl even wider into a saccharine sweet grin. “If my memory serves me right, you were the one that dragged me here. Isn’t that right, dear?”
Shivers run down your spine - ones he runs the soft, rounded pads of his fingers up and down along. You’re sure you looked like a disgustingly loving couple to the poor lady working at the counter. And to put her out of her misery, if anything, you recite, “A-anyways- apologies. Room 143, please.” Managing to plaster on a weak smile, it only falls flat when the receptionist hands you your key - and two complimentary condoms along with it. “I- uh- thank you?”
And it’s all you can do to not just shove off the 6’3 thorn at your side when he steers the two of you to the elevator with a disbelieving, “Only two?”
Though, you’re sure it wouldn’t do much against him, anyway. It never has - because ever since you’d stepped foot through Jujutsu High’s towering gates as its newest teacher, Gojo Satoru seemed to make it his mission in life to get on each and every single one of your nerves. The only mission he’d willingly do, mind you. Insisting on interrupting your classes, hiding you little sweets in your office, pushing your buttons in front of-
“Well, that went as inconspicuous as ever.” Gojo hums, reeling you out of your little reverie. “Of course, it did, thanks to me.”
“‘Inconspicuous’ my ass.” you groan, hastily punching in the ground number for your room. Yaga had said that the veil was already completed around the entirety of the curse-infested floor by now, good - the faster you could get away from Gojo, the more intact your sanity would be. “If it wasn’t for me smoothing things over, she’d be filing a complaint against the sleazy man in a bad Kakashi cosplay at this very moment.”
“Hey! I didn’t see you putting on any Oscar-worthy performances. And my Kakashi cosplay is gre-”
DING!
The elevator doors open to a seemingly normal, barren hallway - not a hair or person out of place - though, you knew better. And as much of a fool as Gojo acted, he did, too.
His steady arm drops from your side when you stretch out your limbs in preparation - shit, you forgot it was still there. “Watch and learn, Gojo.” you hum.
“Hell yeah, I’m watching.”
A beat of silence. Two.
With his thick blindfold, Gojo’s expression was almost indescribable - but your skin prickles with the slow, sultry sweep of his eyes down your figure. But before you can snap back at his loaded tone, it happens- “Don’t fall behind, sweetheart.”
Curses burst out of the fourteen heavy, wooden doors along the narrow corridor - some small, some big, all crushed easily under the power of your cursed technique. And neither of you had to utter a word to know you’d both be trying to best the other.
You’ve got one slobbering mess of a curse trapped underneath your heel, locked in combat when Gojo calls out from somewhere across the hallway. “Still stuck on that grade one?” Your jaw ticks, pressing the curses face deeper into the carpeted floor of the bedroom, “I’ve already located one of two special grades- better keep up.”
Fuck, curse him and his six eyes.
Not wasting any more time, you easily exorcize the remaining curse, feet carrying you door after door. Most of the infestation had been cleared out by now by the both of you, splatters of red and limbs lining along the hallway - you only felt bad for Ichiji having to organize a clean-up after this.
The next time you saw Gojo’s flash of cerulean eyes was from outside another bedroom. Goading, “Heh, need a little help, Gojo?”
“Oh fuck-” he wraps two arms around the special grade’s flowered horns. Powerful legs bowed, cloudy hair mussed, blindfold dangling somewhere around his neck - he was beautiful. And it was fleeting moments like this that you held an ounce of begrudging respect for him. Ripping those offending appendages, “-off. Roughed up the other special grade for ya since you were so slow, sweetheart - consider it a lil’ gift for this date.”
“Oh, fuck you-”
In the midst of it all, Gojo still manages to flutter his long lashes your way, “Well, we are in a love hotel, after all. Just say so if you wanna get those pretty hands on me.”
“I wouldn’t fuck you if you were the last person on Earth, Gojo Satoru.”
His loud bout of laughter follows you to the final hotel room - 143, coincidentally. It was decadent, almost-spotless - had it not been for the towering curse hunched over in the middle. You could tell that Gojo had been here, because its pink, scale-like skin was already bruised.
You slam the door shut behind you, better to keep the property damage to a minimum. Hastily getting into action - it wasn’t anything new, after years of exorcizing curses you’d grown used to predicting their pattern of attack. But it was only after a pressurized, finalizing punch of yours lands right on the curse’s thumping neck that you find yourself growing weary. Cautious of the tiny, red flower that’d sprouted out of thin air on its skin. Immediately, you think back to Hanami, because it was blossoming - unnaturally fast - petals unraveling to explode in sparkly pollen-
Shit. Your head whirled, eyes watery at the heady scent, “Wh-what the fuck-”
It takes only that split-second of distraction before more blooms pop! pop! pop! all down the curse’s figure. It just heaves with fatigue when they all burst out the same powdery substance from before.
“Fuck- what is this-” your thighs clench together, teeth clenched so hard it hurt. You stagger back towards your opponent, and it seems this last-ditch Hail Mary caused more damage than good. Because the curse was lethargic, barely even flinching when you’re back to pummelling it with your cursed technique. Again. And again and again- “-if only you’d taken to making perfumes- instead-”
It falls to the ground with a last ringing screech, the flowers withering away instantly.
But the damage was done.
And you’d never felt so drained - even after your most difficult of missions. Never sinking down onto your knees this way, skin heated, mouth salivating. The air in the room was just thick with something so delicious - syrupy, with hints of pine and cherry - traitorously, you find yourself inhaling deep, addictive lungfuls of the scent.
“Smells so-” your brows furrow, digging a hand into the plush bed beside you to clamor back onto your feet. “Smells like-”
Gojo.
Your entire body jolts with something so dark - visceral, gasping when you feel your underwear just drench. Mind such a melty mess filled with only Gojo Gojo Gojo - and before you know it, you’re stumbling towards the door-
Bang!
The aroma only grows heavier near the door, blood thunders in your ear at the deafening crash from outside. Shit, had you locked the door-
Bang! Bang! BANG-
Fuck, neither of you were making it out alive.
It’s the first clear thought headlining through your mind for the first time in what feels like ages - only several, syrupy-slow seconds later does it follow up with the realization that you’re now standing face-to-face with Gojo.
Gojo pain-in-your-ass Satoru.
Who looked absolutely crazed right now - teetering unsteadily on his feet, his head was bowed, fingers trembling. The mahogany hotel door in mere splinters under his hands.
“F-forgot you could teleport?” It comes out a yelp - pained, almost - and the very first note of your strained voice is enough to have his entire, powerful body wracking with a gasp. Goosebumps pricking along his milky skin, he finally - finally raises his eyes.
Shit, he’s finally lost it.
Because Gojo’s gaze was burning, lids hooded, dark pupils blown so wide that his eyes looked almost black. He didn’t look at you with that usual teasing glint, no, he looked like he was going to rip you apart. Twitchy, drinking in a shaky, drawn-out gasp of the scented air. You almost had half the mind to wonder whether this was some special grade masked as your coworker.
But it’s real - it’s so, so real and you can’t deny it when he’s baring you with such a vicious grin. Plump lips pulled back to show off those glinting canines, “You.”
“Satoru.”
His lips are on yours - pressing and pressing so hard you were sure it bruised. But fuck- you’re kissing back - because how could you not? The candied seam of his mouth was addictive, breathing you in like his last breath of fresh air.
“Kiss me-” he spits into your slack mouth, as if he wasn’t already. Two hands surging forwards to cup your cheeks even deeper, “Kiss me kiss me kiss- fuck-” That last little swear almost comes out as a whimper, and you can only keen when Gojo wraps his pretty lips around your tongue, sucking lewdly. “Y’smell so sweet- taste so sweet-”
“Sa-t-toru-” you’re managing out. It just then hits you how weak your knees have gotten, sinking down to straddle his muscular, jutted-out thigh. It makes him throw his head back when you’re just dragging your hips in a long, languid stripe. “Look what you’ve- what you’ve gotten us into.”
Pulling away to lick lazily up, up, up your neck, his teeth bite just at your thundering pulse. “Me?” he hisses out, voice a few octaves higher than usual. “You think I’m the one fuckin’ responsible for this?” It almost hurt - but it hurt so good. “I’m responsible for this-” And his startling eyes sink down to the darkening wet patch on the middle of his leg, your flimsy panties sticking to his uniform. “-am, I?”
“Yes.” your defiant fingers are trailing down the hem of his shirt, ripping apart those buttons in hasty, urgent tugs until it was off completely. “If only you hadn’t half-assed it with this special grade then-”
Gojo huffs out in humorless laughter into your lips - the same one he’d give a persistent little curse, and it makes your hairs stand on end. Wondering how high the kill count would really be. In the hundreds? Thousands? “I thought you were supposed to be the babysitter, huh?”
Millions.
“And aren’t you the strongest?” A trembly hand of yours ventures its way down his flexing body - down, past those plush pecs, past his flinching abs, dipping teasingly just above where you could feel the hiking tent in his tight pants. “How did you end up this hah- bad?”
You’re holding back a groan at the long, solid inches straining to break free of his thick fabric, you could feel the rapid thump! thump! thump! of his throbbing length under your palm. Fuck, water was wet - Gojo Satoru, unfortunately, had a big di-
“You.”
It’s low, ragged - so quiet that for a second you think you almost imagine it.
“You.”
His lips are sagging open once more, greedy gaze widening - and you knew it was glowing now. Tiny flickers of blue lightning flickering at the ends of his eyes with every mindless gyration of your palm down his bulging, clothed shaft.
“It’s all because of you.”
Yeah, you would be lucky number one on his kill count when he breaks - or maybe he would be on yours
Your back is hitting the mattress, and the buttons of your poor uniform are hitting the velvety floor - absolutely nothing against the strongest, who was now tearing through your clothes the same way he was ripping apart those curses from before.
Shit- did he teleport you two?
“Don’t know-” Gojo pants out feverishly, and at that moment you weren’t sure if you’d simply babbled your thinking out loud or whether he could read your mind. “Don’t- don’t know- fuuck.” Low, feral groans crack at the back of his throat with each inch of your exposed skin, and before you know it, he’s surging forwards into the naked valley of your breasts. Breathing you in so filthily, “Just know that I need you- fuck m’gonna fuckin’ kill someone if I don’t-”
Each spat out little word is punctuated with an intoxicated push and pull of Gojo’s hips. Angrily rutting in-between your thighs until it was just a clingy, syrupy mess of slick and precum between you two.
“Oh-” your lips drop into a soft gasp, reaching out your fingers to smear a sinful sheen down them. It glosses all the way to your wrist with each newly beaded wave of his precum.
It feels so dirty the way you’re pushing the very tips of your fingers into your mouth. Gojo can only look - can barely even breathe when you slur, “You taste so good, too, Toru.”
Oh, that was it.
Gojo Satoru had finally thought he was getting control of his sanity - he finally thought the effects of that cursed technique were wearing off. But now - at that little nickname - he feels something snap. The lamp on your right bedside table shatters.
And usually, Gojo’s taunting was tinted with a little laugh, an inkling of fondness in them - but right now they sounded pained. Wrenching out of his broad chest, “Fuck you. Need you- do you know what you’ve done.”
Your useless skirt - along with your soaked, see-through panties - are ripped off of your squirming body. And for once in his life, he’s speechless - eyes almost bulging out of his skull, nails digging into the plush of your thighs.
Your clothes end up in a pile of sad tatters on the floor, and you felt a strange inkling that maybe you’d end up much the same.
Smack!
Two, large fingers slap down harshly right on your drooling cunt, slobbering down a glistening coat of your pretty juices down his wrist. “Pay attention.” He’s pressing a hot, open-mouthed kiss to your neglected nipples, your stomach, down, down, down in a flurry until the very tip of Gojo’s nose was nudging at your pulsing clit. “Because if m’losing control I need you to stop me.”
The dim hotel lights flicker when Gojo meets your cunt in a sultry, self-indulgent kiss. And through it all, one thing burns into your dizzy mind - his eyes. Maddened, gleaming with slight blue cursed energy in-between your legs.
“Oh.” you’re gasping at the sheer burning stretch of your thighs being pushed to their limits. Gojo didn’t need that much space - he just loved the way you whined. “You’re s-so much better when you shut- hah!”
His tongue shuts you up by flicking harshly over your puffed-up clit, letting your syrupy juices slide their slow way down his eager tongue. “There we go- good girl, good fuckin’ girl. Hah- all it took was some shitty curse to get you hah- honest like this f’me, huh?”
“Don’t act like- ngh!” you’re barely able to drawl the words out, which makes him grin a dangerously content grin. Sharp teeth clenching teasingly around your angry clit, throbbing and slicked glisteningly with his spit, “Don’t act like I’m the only one- this way- hah-”
It was true - every hollowed-out suck on your needy clit had him grinding onto the mussed-up mattress. Those silken sheets hiking up with every drag of Gojo’s weepy erection down onto the bed - imagining you underneath him. It wasn’t enough - it never will be.
That realization was enough for him to break out into a drunken grin, hot tongue smearing open your folds over and over- “Yeah? What about it? Does it scare you that I want to fuckin’ break you, sweetheart?”
He was crazed.
Dangerous. Depraved.
“N-no-” you give such a harsh pull on his soft strands, he’s leering up at you with a dragged-out groan. Looking for the life of him so used - you just knew there’d be thousands that would kill to see the strongest so fucked-out, ear blearily blinking open, flushed your favorite shade of pink up to his cheekbones, mouth chasing those thin spit strands to your glossy pussy. “Jus’ think s’unfair how I’m the ah- only one havin’ fun right now.”
You’re shutting up his pussydrunk protests about how he is having fun and to “please, please, please don’t stop” by crashing your soft lips against Gojo’s. Wrenching him upwards, he lets himself be so used.
“Need you-” you’re gasping, biting into his pouty lower lip. Nosing slowly up his bobbing Adam’s apple, you gasp in that heady combination of pine and candied cherry. “Wanna see if you hngh- taste as good as you smell right now.”
“No fuck- fuck you.” he hisses, wrangling you to straddle his angrily fidgeting hips.
Running a hand down to fumble with his metallic belt - already loosened. But you don’t have the patience - or the sanity - for that right now, because you’re tugging, shredding. The tell-tale buzz of jujutsu fizzing at your fingertips when you tug down the entirety of Gojo’s pants. Kneading the soft peaks of your palm over that sensitive divot on his head, “Who’s fucking who?”
“Me.” And there’s another smack! to the heated place of your cunt, Gojo’s own fingertips having you see stars with his power.
He takes the distraction to just drag you upwards like some ragdoll, easily maneuvering you around. “Turn- turn around f’me- thaaat’s right, fuck-” You’re jostled until your shaky thighs straddle either side of his head, puffed-out pants condensing hotly against your cunt. Your own coming face-to-face with the fat head peeking out from the hem of Gojo’s boxers. Head swimming with how angrily pink he looked, already winking with a drenched sheen of precum up at you. “Arch that cute back a lil’ more- lemme see.”
You’re whirling your head over your shoulders to catch the fucked-out grin on his lips, dragging his tongue out to lap up every bead of your sweet sweet juices, he tilts his pliant head back against the pillows to let it slide down his bobbing throat. “Y-you’re really that pussydr- hngh!”
Another branding smack! leaves you gushing even more down his tongue. “Yeah, s’what I fuckin’ thought.” he spits out a thick wad of spit into your messy cunt. Gliding his wet fingers over the dripping mess that puddles onto the his chest below. “-can’t even run your mouth- so desperate f’me. Taste so good-” Using his inhuman strength to haul you down onto his pretty face.
Before he knows it, he’s slotting the thin tip of his tongue past your quivering hole. Taking him so greedily, the elastic ring of muscle stretches all around his form, clamping down as if to milk something delicious.
And Gojo knows - he thinks with whatever’s left of his rationality that maybe he should slow down, take a second to fuckin’ breathe. But, no, he’s making out with your ravaged pussy like he’s angry he hasn’t done this before - way back when he first met you.
A slender fingers pushes past your swollen folds to curl deftly into your gummy cunt, molding up into that easy divots at your walls. He’s feeling around so depravedly for your g-spot, aching to make you feel just a drop of the sheer need he does.
“Fuck!” Your velvety walls come crashing down around his fingers, knuckle-deep inside your ravenously swallowing cunt. Only getting faster - dipping perfectly to press up against your spongy sweet spots. Shit, he really was good at everything, huh? “You’re so…”
“What was that?” Gojo’s tittering, “Can’t hear you over your cute cunt, sweetheart.”
You don’t answer - you don’t need to, because all the breath in his lungs exhale out in a low cascade. Hiccuping around your candied clit when you take Gojo’s thick, weepy tip just past your lips. Wrapping just around the sensitive slit, it makes him gasp, it makes him keen, it makes him spit out some sloppy swears into your cunt.
“What was that? Can’t hear you over my cunt, Toru–” you bat your lashes, humming around his velvety head. Fuck- if you were in any better state of mind you’d have taken longer admiring him.
Because he was so massive, so pretty with prominent veins thumping at the roof of your mouth. Girthy, rotund end a throbbing red, gradiating into a creamy pink that meshed in delicately with those neat tufts of white at Gojo’s toned pelvis. So delicious. Big enough that you were already wondering just how you were going to walk out of this bedroom - if either of you are in a walking state - or even alive - that is.
“Fuck- fuck you little-” his mouth refuses to part with your puffy pussy lips, even if it was to talk back to you. “Don’t you dare fuckin’ think this is-”
The new angle has his sharp jaw grinding up into you, jostling your body up and down all over his face. He’s whining - heaving - at this point with every sultry swirl of your soft tongue around his twitchy head. Coating down every inch of your silky soft mouth with a hot sheen of precum, he tastes so good on your tastebuds - slightly salty, with a tinge of something so sweetly Gojo.
Powers acting before him, he doesn’t even realize it before he cheats - just a little. Eyes burning with power when Gojo uses his six eyes to plunge scarily accurately into the plushy bullseye of your g-spot. Greedy fingers hitting it again and again and-
“Satoru!” your scolding tone has his globular tip twitch ferally into the back of your throat. “That’s not- I can feel your jujutsu, y’know. S-so-”
“What? Good? Heavenly?” Gojo rattles off. You’re fucking your drooling pussy back into him - you can’t stop the mindless, shallow little grinds in an attempt to meet his mean pace. “Never said anythin’ about a jujutsu ban, pretty- you’re sounding like a sore loser to me.” As if on cue, your cunt is gushing out in more silken sweet juices all down the lower half of his face, squelching so obscenely. His droopy eyes admire your glistening cunt, riding his face to his insanity. “Well- not this cunt, of course, in fact- I think she’s gonna cum.”
He didn’t have to tell you - you already knew, with the trembling in your thighs, and the white-hot pleasure stemming from his incessant making out. Without answering, you only swallow up a few more solid, rock-hard inches of his painfully hard cock, lips stretched obscenely.
“Y-yeah- fuck, now I definitely know you’re close, pretty girl-” he’s lolling out his tongue to let you drag your pussy across harshly. “Don’t be stubborn- cum f’me,” Rough patches of his tastebuds massaging you just right, fingers still pumping recklessly. “Cum f’me- please. Wan’ it on my tongue- want you- want you to use me- please.”
It doesn’t take long before you’re finally cumming, fucking your high over and over Gojo Satoru’s pretty face. He’s wrapping a free hand around the small of your back, just crashing you back into his drunk mouth over and over and–
“F-fuck, Toru–” you whine, toes curling with each crashing wave of pleasure. It was so violent - so dragged-out, like no orgasm you’ve had before. And you didn’t know whether it was because of the technique or the lazy drag of Gojo’s mouth all over every beading inch of your pussy. Your fist tightens around the thick, heated base of his cock, “Need- need you to-”
“No. Fuck-”
In the fleeting millisecond it takes you to blink, your front is being pushed back onto the now-damp sheets again, a grinning Gojo hovering over you. He looked so ruined - smile gleaming with your trickling, dripping precum, eyes crazed. Suddenly, you almost understand why every breathing thing fears him - almost. His eyes were blazing, flushed angrily. “I’m burning- think m’gonna die if I don’t fuck this cunt right now. Fuck-”
“Havin’ to use your powers for everything?” you’re quirking a brow over your shoulder. “Don’t tell me the only reason you brag about being so hah- good in bed is because of that?”
He’s narrowing his glowing eyes, tiny sparks of lightning flying furiously, “Ohhh s’that a challenge, sweetheart?” Gojo’s sharp canines tug on your bottom lip, and you moan into the messy clash of a kiss - all spit and teeth and the taste of you two. “Tell me.”
“So what if it is?” you’re managing to push back against his slender waist. “Without those stupid powers, m’the better…”
Whatever insult was on the tip of our tongue dies down at the glint of the foil in his hand - the condom from before. That tiny square looking so pitiful held between two fingers, “The receptionist gave me an XL, funny, right?” Gojo murmurs, so dark. “Such a shame it won’t fit.”
One daring glance downwards proves him right - because Gojo was sitting so heftily sandwiched between your swollen folds. Painfully beading needy pearls of translucent precum all over your front - fuck, your cockdrunk self from before didn’t recall him being so large. Big enough that you were sure any rubber would be on the verge of shattering into little pieces.
So then go in raw- you think. But before the words can tumble out of your mind, he’s giving a slow, slippery slide on your cunt, “S’alright- with these ah- ‘stupid powers’ m’still gonna get a taste of this pretty cunt.”
And then you can’t breathe - fuck, you can’t even think straight.
You feel like you’re being split-apart, because Gojo’s just barely pushing in the fat, round girth of his head. Managing to pop in his long shaft past that sensitive slit, before his body starts moving in hurried, impatient little grinds. Frantically trying to squeeze himself in deeper- “Fuck- fuck fuck fuck, even with limitless you feel so good, sweetheart.”
Limitless - fuck, that’s what it was. You could feel the slight pinch of the pressure around your body, the way he was reaching in so deep inside your velvety cunt despite not even being halfway inside yet.
“Satoru-”
“No-” his flickering eyes bore deep into yours. “Not that- call out f’me properly now, I know that smart mouth of yours can do it.”
Your words are barely a whisper, “Toru–”
The remaining lamp at your left goes out - cracking into tiny shards. And that’s all it takes for him to push and push in, distantly, Gojo knows he should slow down, maybe give you a second to relax - to think. But he could feel his sanity dancing away with every fucking inch fed into your sopping wet pussy, your elastic walls contorting to massage every ridge and vein of his so heavenly. Fuck- he’d fight a thousand more of those special grades just for another taste of this feeling.
“Oh-” Gojo’s jaw hangs slack when he finally bullies past that feeble resistance of yours. The very top curve of his head nudging deeply in a glissading glide down your spongy cervix, heavy balls kissing against your ass.
He lets himself be pulled, used like some filthy toy when your hot tongue cranes to lap up the trail of drool down the corner of his drunken mouth.
“Wanna feel you-” you’re gasping through each thorough, steady ram into your snug channel. “Wanna feel all of you.”
Another memorable slap! resounds through the heady air, sending sparks exploding behind your lids. “Heh- s’this your way of hah- having me stop using my powers?” he chuckles. “I’m onto your dirty, dirty tricks, y’know.”
Truly, he wasn’t. Gojo didn’t think he had enough of his brain unfried to even contemplate that right about now. But it was just so much fun to watch you mewl in protest, your cunt dripping even further down his twitchy balls with each taunt.
“Please- fuck m’burning up-” you spit. “Scared s’gonna have you c-cumming early?”
As a punishment - or maybe a little reminder about who really was the strongest, Gojo infuses his next sharp smack on your clit with an ounce of his jujutsu. The curve of his thumb gliding over in tiny circles to soothe over the buzz, “Talk to me when you can say “cumming” without hngh- stutterin’-”
“Talk to me when you-” Growling into the crook of your neck, it’s all he can do right now to bow his hulking body even deeper into yours, kneeing apart your stutteringly closing thighs. There’s a sloppy, milky ring forming where your folds kept smacking repeatedly against the sharp lines of his pelvis, “-can fuck me without your limitless going haywire.”
Fuck- fuck, how he wanted to prove you wrong. To have you crying out for mercy.
But Gojo’s throat drags out in what almost sounds like a cry when his limitless flickers on and off - just for a second. The mere touch of your slippery soft walls around his hot cock making him just slam down an arm on the headrest. It breaks - shattering into tiny wooden pieces, though, neither of you notice right now.
He’s maneuvering the two of you so easily to push you onto your back. Stuffing your gaping entrance back full again, this time throwing your limp legs onto his broad shoulders to pummel you in such a mean mating press. Just the sight of your fucked-out, pretty face has his ragged breath hitching, “S-sweetheart…”
Whatever answer you give is tangled up in Gojo’s drunken tongue, lapping at your words. His cock feels so heavy, so hot shoving between your legs. And the stretch - fuck, the stretch was something you’d always remember. Stretching out that tight hole into the very girth of his shaft - all the way down from his leaky, flinching head to the thick circumference of his hilt. “I don’t think I can- fuck, can I feel- please, m’dying to know what this cunt feels like-”
Your nails rake down the pale display of his back, those red, red jagged lines making him rut even deeper into you. “Do it then-”
“Yes, ma’am.”
Oh.
Fuck.
It’s like something shatters - maybe limitless, maybe his restraint. Because Gojo’s eyes just fall shut in pure ecstasy, aching cock growing even larger inside you - as if that was even possible. Expanding tautly at your walls, he’s forming you so sinfully around his shape.
“Oh-oh– fuck you feel- how the fuck do you feel so good?” His free hand dips down to roll a depraved thumb over the nub of your neglected clit, catching on your bulgingly-stretched folds. “Holy shit- think m’gonna pass out- think m’gonna die.”
“Hah-” your back arches up sluttily into his around the fifth consecutive time his rough cockhead was grazing so perfectly against your g-spot, fingers buzzing with electricity at your clit. “You’re s-so weak-”
But it didn’t matter, did it? Because all you could do was hiss out a few wet gurgles into Gojo’s mouth, blinking in the sinful sight of him with his eyes so hooded, cheeks burning with a scorching blush, mouth dangling so addictively open while he sucked your tongue. Like he didn’t even realize what he was doing - how each pressurized thrust into your gummy pussy had the lights overhead flickering, sparks of blue lightning bolting from the corners of his mouth at the same sloppy staccato as his hips. How it made you cum.
“Sh-shit, Toru-” you’re gasping at the feeling of your toe-curling high, shots of pure pleasure running through your body. Convulsing up over and over into his weighty body, “Feels so good- m’cumming m’cumming ah-”
Crack!
And then it’s dark.
Hell, Gojo barely even realized when he does, too, shooting out creamy white ribbon after ribbon of seed with a soft, shuddering gasp of your name. And it’s the only thing on his usually-sharp tongue - voice cracking pathetically, when he whines it like a little mantra over and over and-
“Oh-” his five, long fingers splay out across your lower stomach - right where he could feel his own cock twitching wildly at the very bottom of your gooey pussy. Pressing down, hard. “Oh shit- just look at how you’re painted white from the inside-”
The lights were gone out - in all the wards of Tokyo, actually - and yet in the light of the slight flickers of electricity surrounding you two, you could spy the slow, syrupy glob of his cum down your thighs. Coating his hilt in a milky gloss, it sticks to the two of you like a sloppy second skin. “And you expect me to- hah- not go insane.”
You manage out a wet chuckle, too tired to notice how the bed was missing a headboard now. How all the furniture in the hotel room was trashed - as if it’d been slammed down from several feet above. “Hah- b-blame it on the sex pollen.”
The technique has him cumming more than usual, every new wave sloshing at your insides is followed by another - and another until Gojo’s cock felt so raw. Twitching sensitively in a way that brought big fat tears pricking at his eyes, and yet, he still fucks you so harshly into the mattress. Sucking out every remaining dredge of seed in those fat, cum-filled balls thwacking! at your skin. Sloppy. Depraved. Oh, he looked so ruined - like a man that crawled back from death, only to drag you down with him.
“Oh, sweetheart.” Gojo drags his swollen lips down your earlobe. Voice shot, “I don’t think the sex pollen is done yet.”
---
“Trashed all across the floor, trashed furniture - especially in room 143 - Hokkaido still doesn’t even have power.” Yaga’s bellowing voice has you sinking ashamedly further and further into his office seat.
Gojo, however, only beams, throwing an arm around the edge of your chair, “Damn- we should really try to send out the power in all of Asia next time, huh, my pretty girl?”
“Out!”
Across the hallway, three first-years eagerly (well, two of them and a reluctant Megumi) peer into the tense meeting. Wondering what exactly happened in your last mission that caused a record-level amount of property damage and the power to still flicker on and off throughout the day.
Yuji is the first one to speak up, “Well, no one’s dead but- why does the air seem so-” he gestures towards the almost non-existent space between you and Gojo - not anything out of the usual, sure, but the one thing different was the lack of threats. “-weird.” he finishes.
“Tell me about it. That Gojo almost seems…” Nobara shudders in disgust. “...happy.”
And of course, at that very moment, the man of the hour himself turns to look straight at the first-years doing a poor job of hiding themselves behind the door. Sighing overly-loudly, “If you say so, Yaga~” Intertwining his fingers with yours to pull you up with him, “We had a date anyway.”
“A date?”
“A date?!”
“I win.” All eyes - including yours and Gojo’s turn towards the usually-quiet Megumi, his lips turned into the beginnings of a smile. Almost. “You both owe me ten thousand yen.”
A/N. Hope you babygirls have a good weekkkk!!!
Plagiarism not authorized.
#gojo x reader#gojo smut#gojo x you#jjk x reader#jjk smut#jjk x you#gojo satoru x reader#gojo satoru smut#gojo satoru x you#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujutsu kaisen x you#jjk#jjk fic#jujutsu kaisen#gojo satoru#tonywrites
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...
#can't win can i.#spend 15 years being told that all humans are monsters and finally get out just to be told that#OTHER humans are good. but you? you're still a monster.#you and all your friends and family.#...this shouldn't hurt anymore it's not as if i ahven't dealt with it before. not as if it hasn't been near-constant since we left#whatever. i've known there was something wrong with me since i figured out the only reason anyone ever wanted me was for#arcdamn free babysitting.#real people get to have things like parents and therapy and sunlight and desires. i just get to keep things alive#connie post#ic vent#self deprecation tw#pkmn irl#therapy arc
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Needle Little Love - Charles Leclerc x Ferrari! Reader
Summary: When you’re announced as Ferrari’s newest driver, fans love the budding friendship between you and Charles, especially when he adopts your penchant for crochet puns. Netflix expose that there’s more to the story.
Warnings: Slightly suggestive content. Swearing. Fluff
2023-2024 timeline. Pinterest pics.
Requested: Yes by @rebelwrites. Find the full request here
A/N: There's a blurb halfway down
F1 Masterlist
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its_ynln just posted
liked by charles_leclerc, olliebearman and others
its_ynln chronicles of yarnia 🧶
1,609 comments
francisca.cgomes okay but i’m gonna need that top in all colours please
→ its_ynln let me get your measurements at zandvoort
user1 what is charles doing here
→ its_ynln i’m plagued by his brother and we both like to go zoom?
→ arthur_leclerc just for that, i’m not coming to your celebration party in zandvoort. i’ll go party with charles
→ its_ynln don’t want you there anyway
→ oscarpiastri @/charles_leclerc the girls are fighting again
→ user2 i love how they’re just assuming she’ll win
lilymhe i love my pillow! thank you thank you thank you 🌼
→ alex_albon she literally carries it everywhere and i’m not allowed to touch it
user3 we love how racing is just her side hobby
jackdoohan day 116 of asking you to make me my own dinosaur
→ its_ynln i can make a voodoo doll of you if you don’t stop pestering me
→ jackdoohan i’ll be glad when you’re gone
→ user4 gone where!
→ user5 well she is currently leading the f2 championship, and they won't let her back
user6 drop the patterns please, babe
user7 i love how half the people here are because of her crochet, not because she drives
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f1 just posted
liked by ferraridriveracademy, oscarpiastri and others
f1 welcome to the team @/its_ynln we look forward to seeing you on the grid in the new year
5,533 comments
its_ynln what can i say, it’s knot just another hobby
→ user8 babe, stick to crochet. stand up comedy is not for you
ferraridriveracademy take good care of our girl
→ scuderiaferrari thanks for letting us have her
charles_leclerc welcome to the team 😄
→ user9 why is this the blandest welcome ever
→ user10 someone feels threatened
→ arthur_leclerc *trying to contain his excitement
francisca.cgomes this is the best news ever. will you teach me to crochet?
→ pierregasly because stealing my girlfriend over summer break wasn’t bad enough?
→ its_ynln are you still salty that she let me touch her boobs
→ user11 i know it was to measure her chest for clothes but still..
scuderiaferrari are we going to have to pr train you? @/its_ynln
→ liamlawson30 yes
→ alex_albon yes
→ jackdoohan yes
→ its_ynln why am i being attacked by twice the amount of people now?
arthur_leclerc thank god she’s not my problem anymore
→ its_ynln i’ll always be your problem, little leclerc
→ oscarpiastri oh fuck, she’s my problem now
charles_leclerc just posted
liked by maxverstappen1, pierregasly and others
charles_leclerc winter break spent somewhere sunny
2,316 comments
scuderiaferrari come back, we miss you
user1 um, whose hand is he reaching for in that first pic
→ user2 idk but we should be saying thank you for dressing him in that shirt
its_ynln is your skin ferrari red yet
→ charles_leclerc no, i keep getting slathered in sun cream :(
→ arthur_leclerc factor 50?
→ user3 i love that she’s bullying him before she’s even been his teammate on track
user4 this shirt looks similar to one yn posted a few weeks ago??
→ user5 and the hat!!
→ user6 omg how cute would it be if charles was asking her to crochet him some clothes
→ user7 we love a supportive teammate
landonorris rocking the bucket hat, mate. think i can get one in papaya?
→ charles_leclerc i’ll hook you up
oscarpiastri i miss you, dad
→ its_ynln i’m not babysitting next year. just putting that out there ahead of time
→ charles_leclerc not even if i ask nicely?
→ its_ynln maybe if you let me win
→ charles_leclerc 🤔🤨
user8 why are we skipping past the sneaky soft launch?
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2024
“You know, we both have driver’s rooms for this sort of thing,” you breathed, giggling when Charles’ facial hair tickled your neck.
His mouth sucked gently on the pulse point thrumming beneath his tongue, tracing kisses from your ear down to your collarbone. The stack of worn tyres cushioned your back as he pressed your harder against them when you reached around to pinch his backside.
“Oi, I’m talking to you.”
“I’m sorry, mon ange, but you looked so good when you were giving that interview. And you kept laughing-”
“Oh, so it’s not that I’m so irresistible that you couldn't wait until we were safely in the garage. It’s that you were jealous.” You raised an eyebrow at him, unable to fight the smile at his rougish grin.
“You are irresistible,” he murmured, hands snaking around your waist to pull you flush against him. “Why else would I be making out with you in an alley behind the motorhome?”
“Because you’re a horndog.”
You and Charles had been dating for the past year, having met after he caught you winding up his younger brother one race weekend. Ferrari had been eyeing you up all year, asking the Monagesque what he thought of you, prompting him to pay closer attention. Prior to you signing your contract, you’d had to disclose your relationship to Fred Vasseur. Whilst the senior members of the team were aware of your more-than-teammates status, the majority of the paddock were in the dark. Both of you wished to keep the relationship under wraps until your rookie year in F1 had passed, reducing speculation that Charles was the only reason you got your seat. Sneaking around the motorhome was a lot safer than making out behind tyre stacks, but Charles didn’t care at this moment in time.
“You going to be nice and let me win today?” He teased, nibbling at your lower lip.
“I think you mean, am I going to let you massage my feet after I win? I won here last year.”
“Yes, yes, bow down to you.”
“Well, I do like you on your knees.”
Grinning, Charles captured your lips with his once more. Tongue swiping against your bottom lip, he groaned against you when your tongue met his. Hands snaking into his hair, you tugged gently on the soft strands, enjoying the whimper you pulled from his lips. He tilted his hips, pressing himself against you.
“The things you do to me.”
A loud cough - more of a throat clearing - tore the two of you apart. Wide eyed and panting, you both turned in horror to look at the misfortune person who stumbled across you. Fred Vasseur stood at the end of the alleyway, shaking his head at his two drivers. It was bad enough watching them make heart eyes at each other during data reviews but this. Behind him stood a cameraman and a mic guy, mouths agape at their luck. Drive to Survive would be flooded with viewers once they teased this. Breaking News: Ferrari drivers caught locking lips in secret tryst.
“I’ve got Netflix following me around today.” Fred said bluntly, staring you both down.
“Oh crap.”
“Yeah.”
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next day
charles_leclerc just posted
liked by its_ynln, arthur_leclerc and others
charles_leclerc you could say we’re a close knit bunch
4,416 comments
its_ynln i fell for you hook, yarn and stitcher
user8 not charles adopting her crochet puns
jackdoohan so he gets a toothless keychain and i still don’t get my dinosaur?
→ liamlawson30 that’s because he’s sleeping with her
→ jackdoohan if that’s the price...
scuderiaferrari finally. we were getting sick and tired of archiving all the pics we took of you both being cute. now we can post!
→ arthur_leclerc please don’t. it’s bad enough seeing it in person for the past two years. i don’t want it on my timeline
→ user9 two years! they’ve been together two years!
alex_albon can’t believe you posted a photo of her in a nice dress and didn't even give her photo creds
→ its_ynln he’s intimidated by my raw talent
→ oscarpiastri i watched you flip over the handles of your bike the other day
→ its_ynln raw talent
→ charlesleclerc @/its_ynln when was this? why didn’t you tell me? are you okay?
georgrussell63 did she beat you?
→ charles_leclerc i let her win
→ landonorris yeah, you’ve been saying that all season, mate
→ its_ynln you got a nice consolation price out of it tho
→ arthur_leclerc ew!
user10 i love that charles has posted this and yn hasn’t mentioned anything about him lol
→ user11 her entire insta is the two sides of her personality; car and yarn. can't have a man ruining the aesthetic
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A huge thank you to @rebelwrites for the request. I hope this lives up to expectations
Requests for F1 smau's are open. You can see who I write for on my Masterlist :)
#formula 1#f1#formula 1 smau#f1 smau#formula 1 social media au#f1 social media au#social media au imagine#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 headcanon#formula 1 drabble#formula 1 one shot#formula 1 fluff#formula 1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 headcanon#f1 drabble#f1 one shot#f1 fluff#f1 x reader#charles leclerc#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc headcanon#charles leclerc drabble#charles leclerc one shot#charles leclerc fluff#charles leclerc smau#charles leclerc x reader
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I saw a bunch of humans are space orcs, and humans are feared by aliens, etc. and want to add to it.
Kid centre for all alien children/younglings run by humans.
-"Human Kim! Are you all right? Do you seek medical aid??"
"I'm okay! ...why do you ask?"
"You just got bit by Zyz! I'm so sorry, I've told him to not do that with others but-!"
"Hey, it's okay. Look, these things happen and I know that's just your species' way of showing affection. Just tell him to ask next time and to not bite too hard."
"... 'these things happen' .... 'tell him to ask next- human Kim has this happened to you before?!"
"Oh lots of times! I used to work at a daycare on earth before this. Now, you wanna talk about bites let me tell you about Penny, she was a biter. So was my nephew but that was him stimming. I just asked that he get my attention first so as to not startle me."
"Is this the same Penee who gave you 3 stitches?"
"Yep."
-"Human Kim, thank you for helping Pollix become comrades with the other younglings! May I ask how you did it so I may use it in the future?"
"Of course! It wasn't anything special really, we just wrestled which caught the attention of the other kids and soon enough they were cheering for Pollix to win. Then after that Xw and a few others asked Pollix to teach her how to wrestle as well." they finished with a smile.
"YOU WHAT!"
"I-I thought play wrestling and fighting was encouraged among young tighalax. I am so sorry if I did something wrong-!"
"Human Kim, you could have DIED."
"...huh?"
"Tighalaxes have what you call drugs in the points of our tails and one cut should drive you insane. Not only that but we, as younglings, should be nearly twice your body weight. And at this age have yet to control our strength!"
"Ooh so that's why I felt high! Phew! I thought I accidentally ate my weed muffin instead of the regular one, and we can't have that."
"You felt 'high'?"
"Yeah but only for 10 minutes, luckily I usually just get tired and relaxed when high. And for the weight strength part, I grew up babysitting all of my younger siblings and cousins. My child carrying records are 5 4-6 year olds, 4 7-12 year olds, 3 teenagers, and 2 childish giants who are somehow 21 this year."
"...any chance I can bribe you to quit and come work for me and my pack?"
#aliens#humans are space oddities#humans are space orcs#the adventures of kim and max running a space child centre
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undercover verstappen | charles leclerc social media au
pairing: charles leclerc x fem verstappen!reader
get you a girlfriend who will threaten mutiny to get you a seat at a competent team
based on this request: HI BABES I HOPE YOU ARE WELL! I LOVE YOUR WRITING SM! So basically I have an idea for a (possible?) Smau series, so basically it's Charles leclerc × verstappen!reader, she is a reserve driver for redbull but is also maxs race engineer (idk if you call it that? The person that talks to them that one) so she's very involved with the team and f1 in general. The public doesn't know that her and Charles are dating, and they don't even think it as Charles and max "hate" eachother (they are both doing this to protect readers and Charles relationship, they are actually besties) and basically, reader has enough if ferraris tractor, so she's like 'I will get you too redbull' and then checo retires at the end of the 2023 season, and instead of taking the job when she was offered it, she asks if Charles could have it (obviously not publicised) and Christian is like "Yes very good idea" so he asks Charles who is uncertain at first but is then OK with the idea (he is worried about becoming a second driver to max but there is lots of reassuring that he won't be nd so he accepts) and then he goes on to win 2024 wdc (and wcc but irrelevant) and he's sad that he couldn't do it with ferrari omg that's long sorry babes - @lillians-world-is-f1
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liked by maxverstappen, yourusername and 1,390,887 others
tagged: schecoperez
redbullracing: checo has informed the team that he will be retiring from the sport at the end of the 2023 season. we thank checo for his service and all the good times, he will forever be a legend of this sport. VAMOS CHECO 👏
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user1: EXCUSE ME?
user2: they really thought they could drop this on a monday and we'd all be chill
maxverstappen1: i've heard tequila tastes even better when you're retired, congrats mate - we'll miss you
user3: wait does this mean it'll be double verstappen on the grid now?
user4: there's more than one of them?
user5: max's sister is the girl you'll hear on his radio and she's technically the reserve driver as well. so she might step up to the second seat now checo has retired
user6: idk about you but that spells trouble to me
yourusername: congrats checo! will miss you, carola and all the little ones x
schecoperez: you won't be able to get rid of them that easily, i'll be cashing in on some well earned babysitting hours
yourusername: can't wait !!!
user7: what i'm hearing is that there's a chance for a daniel return to red bull?
user8: double verstappen or maxiel i don't want to choose they're both my children
user9: i'm making an outside shout for a charles leclerc red bull era
user10: i am seeing the lestappen vision
user11: my personal headcanon is that both verstappens and charles are all besties and have always been besties
christianhorner: thank you for your service checo, first drink on me 👍
user12: i know christian is sweating having to make a choice between child no 2 y/n and child no 3 daniel
user13: idk i think daniel might have the edge
user14: if geri or max have anything to do with it we might have a team so dutch that the car will be orange next season
user15: christian punching the walls cause lando extended his mclaren contract literally last week 😭
EXCERPT OF RECORDING OF THE RED BULL GARAGE, ABU DHABI
yourusername
liked by charles_leclerc, landonorris and 892,309 others
tagged: maxverstappen1
yourusername: verstappens take the city
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user18: i just know they are simultaneously the best people to party with but also the people you probably don’t want at a house party
yourusername: i’ll have you know i once plunged a toilet at a house party and disposed of a “sick sandwich” i am a DELIGHT
user19: and max?
yourusername: no comment
maxverstappen1: as if ! i don’t care if we’re blood im suing you for slander
yourusername: i watched you volley a vase at AD21
maxverstappen1: i paid for it !!! and you said it was a sick shot anyway FAKE
yourusername: you can say that cause personally i was not at fault of any of my actions that night x
user20: PLEASE MA'AM AT LEAST ONE SEASON OF DOUBLE TROUBLE PLEASE
user21: idk if i could deal with seeing jos verstappen every weekend tho...
user22: obsessed with how neither verstappen follow charles but here he be in her notifications again
user23: someone add it to the interaction spreadsheet i am CONVINCED it will one day lead to more
landonorris: lando norris erasure once again
user24: DID YOU WRITE THAT NOTE???
landonorris: hell no i'd rather peel my skin off than call the three raccoons disguised as a woman pretty
yourusername: good gosh we would've got the point without all of that
maxverstappen1: yeah lando only i'm allowed to call y/n the raccoons in a trench coat. know your place.
user25: so you do wanna tell us who wrote the note then?
yourusername: nope ;p
user26: only y/n and max have been spotted out so maybe it's just brotherly love
user27: LOL? MAX? BROTHERLY LOVE?
danielricciardo: invite seemed to get lost in the mail again
yourusername: either get a room or get out of my comment section
maxverstappen1: ???
user28: no maxiel red bull again. i don't think y/n's blood pressure can take it
f1
liked by maxverstappen1, yourusername and 2,544,924 others
tagged: charles_leclerc & maxverstappen1
f1: ready to see them as teammates? charles leclerc has signed a deal with red bull to keep him at the team until 2028.
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user29: excuse me *clears throat* WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK
redbullracing: welcome charles!!! no inchidents please
charles_leclerc: will we ever hear the end of that joke?
redbullracing: we know what the girlies want charles
maxverstappen1: you get used to it after a while. no ice bath thirst traps here though
charles_leclerc: phew 😥
user30: this little hoe pretending he didn't love it
user31: wait ??? does this mean what i think it could mean? GIRLFRIEND?
user32: i can't take leaving ferrari and a girlfriend in one day sorry
yourusername: welcome to the team charles :)
user33: don't think we forgot about the recording babe... IS THIS WHO YOU RECOMMENED?
danielricciardo: it better not be because if you recommended your lil boyfriend over sexy ol' me i'm gonna be real mad 😭
this comment was deleted
user34: WE SAW THAT WHAT THE FUCK
maxverstappen1: daniel you are so fucking dumb
yourusername: MAX? IGNORE IT?
maxverstappen1: bro it's all over twitter you might as well take the moment to curse out daniel before christian confiscates our phones
yourusername: DANIEL JOSEPH RICCIARDO YOU RAT BASTARD I'M GONNA RIP WHATEVER REMAINING HAIR YOU HAVE LEFT AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR SURPRISINGLY PERKY ASS. IF I HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH IT YOU AND YOUR CHILD BEARING HIPS WILL NEVER GET CLOSE TO A RED BULL EVER AGAIN FOR EXPOSING A SECRET US THREE HAVE KEPT FOR SEVEN FUCKING YEARS
charles_leclerc: what she said
maxverstappen1: oop.
user35: well. can we keep going this is quite fun.
christianhorner: they're all in time out sorry
user36: okay well now that happened... when can we get "who knows me better my boyfriend or my brother" lestappen version 🤨
charles_leclerc: i would wipe the floor with him
maxverstappen1: of course you would you BIG FAT NERD
charles_leclerc: i thought christian took your phone?
maxverstappen1: as if he doesn't fall for the verstappen puppy dog eyes every time
charles_leclerc: you'll use them for me right babe, RIGHT BABE?
yourusername: idk charlie, this is family business
christianhorner: i've taken their phones again
yourusername
liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 1,304,555 others
tagged: charles_leclerc & maxverstappen1
yourusername: my favourite men in the world doing what they do best
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user37: take me out back and shoot me already
christianhorner: interesting i don't see myself here and considering i pay your wages...
yourusername: dads go in different categories?
christianhorner: don't use my paternal instincts against me y/n
yourusername: say goodbye to your father's day card
christianhorner: NO I'M SORRY
user38: the way this proves that second red bull really was y/n's ...
user39: for real imagine loving a MAN so much you give it to HIM 🤮
user40: she also said in that recording at jos made it so bad for the two of them when they did compete that she no longer wanted to give the fans and the media the chance to do it either
charles_leclerc: oh wow that's crazy, you're my favourite woman ever
yourusername: don't be so rude to mama pascale
charles_leclerc: well other than mama obvioysly
yourusername: so i'm not your favourite, i see how it is
charles_leclerc: I AM SO CONFUSED SO I'M JUST GONNA SAY I LOVE YOU
yourusername: awww charlie i love you too
user41: okay i've known about them approximately two weeks and i love them your honour
maxverstappen1: i'm so much better than him y/n be real
yourusername: don't be such a sore loser maxy
maxverstappen1: don't get it twisted, i still won on track
charles_leclerc: not for long
yourusername: okay girlies leave the trash talk for the weekends this is being normal for the sake of y/n's mental health time
user42: good lord this trio is so dear to me
maxverstappen1
liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc and 1,043,788 others
tagged: yourusername & charles_leclerc
maxverstappen1: best thing about winning is choosing the restaurant after - closely followed about the worst thing: third wheeling them.
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user43: max coming through with the y/n and charles content as he should
user44: i need him to open the vault cause i have not forgotten that y/n said this relationship is seven years old
yourusername: i think i had a wet dream about this sushi spread last night
maxverstappen1: as long as that's it, good.
yourusername: i don't need to have wet dreams anymore, the real thing is so much better
maxverstappen1: BLOCKED.
user45: i know y/n is elated to be able to publicly terrorise max with her relationship
user46: so does this mean that this is a system they've had for a while?
yourusername: room service is our middle names
charles_leclerc: maximilian can you please send the last pic to the shared album
maxverstappen1: on it 🫡
user47: SHARED ALBUM? I MIGHT DIE
yourusername: you two are such cutie patooties
maxverstappen1: but for real no being so cute on my jet again or just wait for me to go for my nap
charles_leclerc: heard and understood
yourusername: or maybe just get a life and stop being so lonely
danielricciardo: can i join for sushi or am i still banned?
maxverstappen1: eh, you could take y/n in a scrap
danielricciardo: she read my ass for filth on main i'm scared of her
charles_leclerc: she had you gagged
danielricciardo: and this litlle guard puppy agrees with whatever she says :(
yourusername: as he should !
maxverstappen1: don't try and fight it daniel, i've been in this losing battle for seven years
charles_leclerc
liked by georgerussell63, yourusername and 1,834,903 others
tagged: yourusername
charles_leclerc: life in blue could never be blue with you. i love you baby, thank you for giving me this opportunity, every trophy is for you x
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user48: GOD PLEASE SAVE ME PLEASE GOD SAVE ME FROM THIS SINGLE LIFE.
yourusername: i love you too charlie, i'd do everything and more for you. i'm happy you're happy x
charles_leclerc: you can't get rid of me at this point
yourusername: seven years strong, i'm stuck to you like glue
charles_leclerc: you'll have my last name (or i can take yours) next
maxverstappen1: you can give her a ring but you'll NEVER TAKE THE VERSTAPPEN NAME AWAY
yourusername: you good?
maxverstappen1: yeah but we must always be double trouble. not even THAT man will come between that
user49: this is the trio of my dreams i need a whole drive to survive ep or even spin off just following these losers around
danielricciardo: see how could you be angry that i would want to talk about all this cuteness ?
yourusername: we are cute, correct.
charles_leclerc: i'd use the words incredibly sexy but okay
danielricciardo: are you guys still angry? I'M TRYING TO COMPLIMENT YOU
yourusername: we forgive you daniel.
charles_leclerc: i was also kissing her on my first podium REGARDLESS
yourusername: you're so romantic 🥰
maxverstappen1: GAG.
user50: convinced that max will still be the biggest big brother asshole until he is in the retirement home
alexalbon: flexing the alex albon and lily mun he photography i see
yourusername: thank you for your service
lilymunhe: we can also keep a secret 🤫
danielricciardo: I SAID I WAS SORRY
charles_leclerc: we're gonna hold it over you forever buddy
danielricciardo: was taking the red bull seat not enough?
charles_leclerc: until i win a championship? yes.
fin.
note: I'M BACK!! hope this was what you were looking for xx also, if you guys ever want to support me in any way i have a tip jar on kofi and also my small business @badlydrawnf1cats that has a sticker sheet available right now - love you all xx
#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 instagram au#f1 x you#f1#f1 social media au#charles leclerc x female reader#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc x you#charles leclerc fanfic#charles leclerc social media au
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GYMNASTICS LESSONS ★ LN4
PAIRING ✦ lando norris x fem!gymnastics teacher!reader
SUMMARY ✦ you're a gymnastics teacher, and you manage to catch the eye of an f1 driver one friday night, though you both recall the way in which you met in different ways. [ SMAU ]
WARNINGS ✦ cursing
REQUESTED ✦ here!
NOTES ✦ i altered the request slightly and made it so that lando was picking up his niece from the gymnasium instead. reader lives in bristol in the uk & has a sibling. for the sake of this fic, let's pretend that all the drivers are friends off of the grid!! the fc i've used is pamela hughes, but feel free to picture whoever you want! my requests are closed at the moment.
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liked by yourbsf, friend1, and 431 others
yourusername easter holidays well spent ✔️ back to teaching now!!
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yourbsf MY GIRL FOREVERRR 😍😍😍
yourusername MY BABY 🫶🫶
yourbsf im so obsessed with you its not healthy at all
yourusername literally me with you ❤️
friend1 UM MISS Y/N WHERE DID YOU GO ON VACATION.
yourusername tenerife 🌞🌞
friend2 ur glowing girllll
yourusername all you omg!!
imessages ( y/n)
imessages ( lando )
liked by yourbsf, landonorris, and 426 others
tagged yourbsf
yourusername me and pepper have been chilling ✌️
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yourbsf PEPPERRR AWW 🥺🥺
yourusername she misses you ❤️
yourbsf MY GIRL 💋💋
yourusername foreverrr 💘
friend1 y/n are you serious why is there a f1 driver in ur likes.
friend2 RIGHTTT
yourusername wait huh
landonorris um hey? 👋👋
yourusername OH MY GOD NOT YOU AGAIN.
landonorris i don't know whether to be offended or not
imessages ( y/n)
imessages ( lando )
liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc, and 788 others
tagged yoursibling
yourusername adventures in babysitting (the cinema was fun too) 💐
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user1 good golly she's stunning 😍😍
yourusername thank you sm baby ❤️❤️
yourbestfriend oh my days is that leila 🥺
yourusername yess!! i took her to the gym with me 😭❤️
yoursibling cutiessss❤️❤️
yourusername she's in safe hands trust
danielricciardo i once saw lando norris save five cats from a tree at the same time, he's just that guy 🤷♂️
alex_albon lando norris literally saved my entire family from a burning building once 🔥🔥
maxverstappen1 lando lets me go in front of him to win races because he's just that kind 🙏
georgerussell63 lando norris can lift a whole racecar over his head and do squats with it (trust)
yourbsf THESE ARE GETTING INVENTIVE??
oscarpiastri @/landonorris mate are you sure she's not out of your league
landonorris SHUT UP 😖
friend1 so ur like famous now y/n???
yourusername MATE I JUST WOKE UP TO THIS.
user2 i can see why lando likes her - she is GORGEOUSSS
liked by landonorris
imessages ( lando )
imessages ( y/n )
liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, and 13,190 others
yourusername black n white 🖤
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user7 THE PRETTIEST GIRL EVERRR!!
user8 someone tell me what she does as a job pls?
user9 she's a gymnastics teacher!! my sister used to do baby gym lessons with her, she's the sweetest 🫶🫶
user10 okay but can little lando norris actually handle all that? 😍
user11 no but i absolutely can🤞🤞
user12 waiting patiently for lando to come hype her up
user13 her (unwanted) personal hype man 🔥
yourbsf yummyyyy 🤤🤤
yourusername all mine ❤️🔥❤️🔥
landonorris damnn 😍
yourusername very smooth norris!
landonorris so...it's finally working then??
yourusername idk it's not coming into effect yet tbh
landonorris might have to come pick up mila a third time then
yourusername
( caption one: wined and dined 🍷 | caption two: ❤️. )
imessages ( y/n)
liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, and 28,891 others
tagged landonorris
yourusername it's too late to get a refund, so i guess im stuck with him now. ❤️
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user14 IT'S OFFICIALLY CONFIRMED?? SCREAMINGGG
user15 if he doesnt treat you right im always here bbg 🫶
user16 ONGG
user17 new power couple alert ⚠️⚠️
user18 i cannot waittt to see pics of them together i swear
user19 HOW ARE YOU SO PERFECT
user20 TWO MONTHS AFTER THE FIRST RUMOURS STARTED AND ITS FINALLY ANNOUNCED 🎉🎉🎉
yourbsf still cant believe you replaced me with a m*n 😖😖
yourusername YOU'RE FOREVER NO.1 IN MY HEART I SWEARRR HE MEANS NOTHING TO ME ❤️🔥❤️🔥
yourbsf how has he done this (taken my wife). what a little rat. he better count his days.
landonorris i can read?
yourbsf oh can you now? 😊
yourusername guys pls be civil 😭
landonorris YUM
yourusername me or the pasta??
landonorris both 🍝🤤
oscarpiastri still don't know exactly how he's done this.
charles_leclerc right?
alex_albon we haven't ruled out witchcraft yet so
landonorris GUYS WHY DO YOU HAVE NO FAITH IN ME STILL ☹️☹️
georgerussell63 it's just a tad bit unbelievable mate
yourusername i get it, im wayyy out of his league tbh. still contemplating on whether i should stoop this low
landonorris yeah yeah, love you too y/n ❤️
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#f1#f1 x reader#f1 smau#formula one x reader#f1 imagine#formula 1#f1 imagines#f1 x you#requests#lando norris#lando norris x y/n#lando norris imagine#lando norris x reader#lando norris x female reader#f1 x female reader#f1 x y/n#lando norris fanfic#lando norris x you#formula one#mclqren
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we can’t be friends (wait for your love) | max verstappen x best friend! reader
yourusername
liked by maxverstappen, kellypiquet, and others
yourusername maxxie won in brazil! so so so proud of my best friend 💗
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user372 okay but compare y/n’s post to kelly’s and you can tell who actually is proud of him
↳ user33 one of them only posts when he wins and the other posts congratulating him no matter the results
maxverstappen ecstatic to have you in the paddock this past weekend! thanks for coming y/n/n
↳ yourusername i’m there whenever you want me to be maxxie!
kellypiquet so so proud of my boy!
↳ yourusername so proud of him too! 💗
user81 kelly staking her claim on max like y/n and max aren’t just friends 😭
↳ user44 you don’t know the lore??? go check user711’s pinned on twitter… rip y/nmax ☹️💔
francisca.cgomez great to see you around this weekend! missed you tons bbygirl 💗
↳ yourusername missed you tons kiks, so so grateful to have seen you this weekend 😘
user4 missed the ynmax content </3
↳ user71 when we went YEARS without ynmax content because kelly told y/n she didn’t like her relationship with max :(
twitter user771 pinned tweet!
kellypiquet
liked by maxverstappen, yourusername, and others
kellypiquet still riding the high ☄️
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yourusername so so proud of him! can’t believe it!
↳ kellypiquet p’s asking when auntie y/n can come over
↳ yourusername give me a date and a time and i’ll babysit for you!
user832 only posting when he wins is crazy 😭
user18 diabolical move telling y/n (the ultimate mom friend) that her daughter wants to see her auntie y/n
↳ user33 plotting how to get rid of y/n using P
maxverstappen ❤️
messages between Kelly and y/n
kellypiquet and maxverstappen
liked by landonorris, carlossainz, and others
kellypiquet and maxverstappen baby verstappen coming may 2025!
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user33 no y/n in the likes ???
↳ user72 ynmax drought again????
↳ user21 definitely something to do with max and kelly having a baby together ☹️💔
carlossainz congratulations to the two of you!
↳ maxverstappen thank you carlos!
landonorris that was.. unexpected. godfather lando 2025!
↳ maxverstappen and who said anything about you being godfather?
user91 the way y/n would’ve been the mother of max’s kid if they both stopped being delusional 💔
↳ user61 leave them alone my god, do you y/n fans ever stop being weird
↳ user91 nah this has gotta be kelly’s burner or something 😭
lewishamilton congrats man! happy for you!
↳ maxverstappen thank you! means a lot coming from you
yourusername
liked by charles_leclerc, lewishamilton and others
yourusername while i am not officially a musician, i have dabbled in music before… here’s my first ever single, we can’t be friends, out friday! i hope you love it just as much as i do.. and a special thank you to charles_leclerc and lewishamilton for helping produce and cowrite this song!
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lewishamilton thank you for letting me help produce this song! so so proud of you and how far you’ve come from the little girl in the paddock chasing around her papa and his drivers to now being an official marketing and pr agent
↳ yourusername thanks lew! i appreciate you so so much! truly such a blessing for you to help me out with this!
user832 okay but album when?
↳ user1 CHILL she just released a single
user44 and when we get an album about what truly went down 2016-2020 then what
↳ user33 hey so actually let’s not because i’ll go insane
charles_leclerc thank you for letting me compose some of the piano parts! it was a blessing to be able to work with you
↳ yourusername no, thank you for helping me get the ideas out of my head! so honored to work with you on this piece
messages between max and y/n
this was definitely not what was supposed to come out first, but i figured posting this which was sitting in my drafts was better than trying to write and add photos to a new smau! so hurt my feelings, which is max x ex! reader, will be out sometime by the end of the week (or beginning of next week at the latest)! this is very short, but i do really like this one and wanted to post it to garner feedback on what everyone seems to like seeing from me! likes and reblogs are appreciated.. (also i am working on a taglist and masterlist, so comment down below if you’re interested in being added to a taglist!)
#f1 smau#formula one#f1 social media au#f1 imagines#formula one imagine#f1 x reader#max verstappen smau#formula one social media au#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen#max verstappen social media au#max verstappen fanfic#max verstappen fluff#max verstappen angst#max verstappen series#max x reader#f1 x y/n#formula one x you#formula one x y/n#formula one angst#f1 imagine#f1 fic#f1#formula one x reader#formula one smau#we can’t be friends universe
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Evan tells Tommy that he's babysitting Jee, but he still really wants to spend time with Tommy, if Tommy doesn't mind - and Tommy accepts. Jee's part of Evan's family, and Howie's family, and how bad can hanging out with a three-year-old - almost four, he is told by her in the car - be anyway? What he's expecting is a night on the couch watching Frozen. (Kids still like that, right?) Maybe tea parties. What he does not expect is that Evan already has an outing planned to Chuck-E-Cheese. Surprise - Chuck-E-Cheese still exists. He would've sworn they went bankrupt back in 2020.
He's not sure what Jee is going to think of him, but she remembers him from the hospital as "Uncle Buck's dirty friend" and accepts his presence easily enough. She keeps her hand in Evan's as they walk into Chuck-E-Cheese. It's one of the cutest things Tommy's ever seen. There's a thousand kids around, laughing and crying and shouting. He only has to focus on one, he tells himself, and lets Jee lead him and Evan through the maze of games. She stops at a claw machine and demands that her Uncle Buck win her a rabbit toy. After ten minutes, fifteen dollars, and Tommy tagging in, they finally succeed. The next two hours are filled with more exploitative games, the greasiest fucking pizza Tommy's ever had, and Jee spending five minutes deliberating between two similarly-colored bouncy balls to exchange for her tickets. Throughout it all, Evan's patience never wavers, even when they lose Jee for five minutes in the crowd and have to search for her. She's hiding under the air hockey table.
Tommy's doing his best to keep up. He's led all over the place, recruited to help with games, and tries to make sense of Jee's non-sequiturs. While they're standing in line for the bouncy ball, Evan nudges him. There's a big smile on his face. "I know this isn't an ideal date. Thanks for being here." "Of course," Tommy says, and he nudges Evan back. "I like getting to know your family, Evan." It's not what he expected, but seeing first-hand how full of love Evan's family is, how much love he has for them - he wouldn't trade it. Not even for the bluest bouncy ball. Evan's smile grows even wider. They're almost out the door when Jee spots a photo booth and hones in. "I wanna photo," she says, tugging at Evan's hand, and Tommy dutifully follows along. He'll - wait out here, he guesses, while Evan and Jee take their photo. They wouldn't all fit, anyway. It's a little awkward, hanging around the photo booth, but it's fine. They disappear behind the curtain for a moment and Tommy can hear Jee's high, insistent voice and Evan chuckling and responding, though he can't make out the words. Jee and Evan poke their heads out a second later. "You too!" Jee says, and Evan echoes her with a grin. "Yeah, you too. Get in here." They quickly learn there is no way the photo booth is going to fit them all. Tommy fits maybe a third of his body in. Evan frowns, then lights up again. "Hey, Jee, why don't we get out for a second? Then Tommy can sit down and I can sit on his lap and you can sit on my lap. Okay?" "Okay," she says, so Tommy squeezes in, and a second later Evan plops all two hundred pounds of himself and thirty pounds of Jee onto his lap.
"Evan," he hisses, and Evan grins at him, unrepentant. "Smile for the camera, Tommy," he says, and Tommy finds that his smile comes easily, especially when Evan turns to kiss his cheek on the last photo. After they scrabble out of the photo booth, Evan looks down at the strip of photos and their wide, grinning faces. "Oh, yeah. That's going on the fridge for sure." "For sure," Jee repeats for emphasis, and looks up at Tommy expectantly. "For sure," he says, and he's met with twin smiles.
[this fic has matching art by @aringofsalt! it's adorable and you should definitely go take a look]
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baby finn series, babysitting and date nights
series masterlist
lando norris x mom!wife!reader
summary - uncle carlos comes over to babysit finn as you and your husband enjoy a night out.
masterlist
-
when lando had finally turned the latch of the lock to your shared home, he let out an exhausted sigh. he had been in the sim all day with a long road ahead of him in order to secure a win. he was drained. he had been there the entire day, missing dinner and almost missing bedtime. all he wanted was to hug his young son, kiss his beautiful wife, and take a long hot shower. the universe, however, had other plans.
opening the door, lando was met with baby finn running circles around you in nothing but his diaper. you locked eyes with your husband and he could feel the exhaustion that you were exhibiting, too. finn wasn’t being bad, he was just being a kid. he had loads of energy that you and lando could usually keep up with in high spirits, but, work had been kicking both of your asses. you were both burning out.
“finn, honey, please it’s time for your bath,” you let out a sigh, bringing your hand up to brush the hair out of your face. lando walks over to assess the situation fully, bringing your tired body into his arms for a hug. you slump against him as he kisses your forehead and locks eyes with his son.
“finn. bath. now,” your husband puts his foot down and your son happily runs towards the bathroom, not grasping the exhaustion or irritation of his parents - thankfully. one thing neither of you ever did was push your problems onto your son, and you never wanted to.
“thank you, i’ll head in there in a min-” you begin but your husband cuts you off with a kiss.
“no, we agreed you’d take the morning, i’ll take bedtime. i’ve got this,” lando replies with a swipe to your bum.
“but you look tired, love-”
“so do you. it’s alright, who knows? maybe finn’s innocent energy will rub off on me, eh?” you chuckle at his question and wordlessly nod before he continues, “go get ready for bed, i’ll call you right in,” one more smack to your bum and lando is heading into the bathroom to start his son’s nightly routine as you follow his polite orders to take care of yourself.
around a half hour later, lando is calling you into finn’s room for a cuddle and a tuck into bed. as you arrive, you can see finn slowly losing his energy cuddled into your husband’s arms, letting out a yawn.
“is my sweet boy tired?” you question towards your son, seeing lando nod his head yes as finn lets go of a quiet ‘so much mommy’.
“i think he had a case of the late night zoomies,” lando lets out a laugh as he gently sets his son into bed, proceeding to get him comfortable under the blankets. you both then lean down, kissing his forehead, wishing him a good night's sleep, and reminding him you’d see him in the morning. after the lights are off and the door cracked a bit open, lando leads you down the hall towards your bedroom with a firm hand on your lower back.
you collapse onto the bed in a huff once you enter, leading your husband to quietly laugh at you - still cautious of the sleepy boy down the hall.
“i’m heading to shower, love. care to join?” lando offers with eyes wide and smile even larger. you grant him a feverish nod and begin to follow behind him eagerly as he giggles.
once you were both stripped and into the steamy shower, lando’s body slumped against yours, his back being attacked by the hot water and his head resting on your shoulder. you run your hand gently through his wet curls as he lets out a deep sigh.
“wanna talk about it?” you whisper into his hair. lando shakes his head and mumbles into your shoulder, “could you repeat that, love?” you giggle, shaking your shoulder a bit to move lando’s face out of your neck and into your view. his hands grip your waist as yours are guided to rest on either side of his face.
“i just want to relax, we haven’t had a day just us to relax, i miss my wife,”
“i miss you too but that’s the life of parents, lan. maybe if you had pulled out three year-”
“alright, alright,” he exclaims, “you don’t need to harp on my pullout game for me to get the picture” he laughs while reaching behind you to grab some body wash.
“i do agree we need a small break, though,” you sigh, “work has been draining me, i don’t want it to affect finn,”
“ya know who’s in town next week, love?” lando’s eyes sparkle as he asks, prompting you to laugh and let out a shake of your head, urging him to continue, “carlos,”
-
“okay, bud. uncle los will be here very soon, do you remember what we talked about?” lando is on one knee, bent at your son’s level and looking oh so fine. his black button up with most of the top buttons loose, the dark pants to go with it and the chains dangling from his neck already had you worked up, but the adorable nature of his fatherhood? now that’s hot.
“yes, daddy,” your son replies, you can tell he’s attempting to hold in his excitement as much as he can as he is almost vibrating due to his little bursts of energy.
“can you tell me again, bubs?” lando holds onto his son’s hands, searching his eyes at an attempt to really have finn understand the importance.
“um, say pwease and tank you!”
“very good, what else?”
“be nice,”
“good, bubs, anything else?”
“do what uncle los say?” finn adds his last answer with an unsure smile as he eyes his dad with a tilted head. lando chuckles at his son’s cuteness and kisses his head, nodding in confirmation for your son to listen to his babysitter for the night.
“and help him out, baby. if he needs anything, okay?” you add on, making your entrance in the room known. lando looks over to you and it seems as if his heart stopped, but it hadn’t. if anything it was beating so fast it could've flown out of his chest. standing up from his position on the ground, he makes his way over to you, mouth agape, eyes raking your figure, and head slowly shaking left to right.
“you look…” your husband drinks in your appearance again, eyes scanning you from head to toe, “absolutely breathtaking,” he finishes off, his right hand coming over to hold his heart.
“thank you, my love,” you giggle a bit, stepping to him in order to plant a kiss to his cheek, “you clean up pretty nice, too,” you shoot him a wink, walking past him and towards your son.
“thanks for walking away, dear. this view is much better,” lando lets out a chuckle, eyes not daring to drift from your ass, until your head swivels - and he catches your smile.
“anytime, baby,” you laugh at his antics, leading him on as you bend over to grab your son, slower than usual. you hear a deep groan come from lando but before anymore comments were made, the doorbell rang throughout the home. finn drops from your arms, beginning his race to the door.
“finn! wait until i open the door!” lando shouts, jogging over to where your toddler was attempting to reach the handle.
“i big like you dada! i do it!” finn jumps again, trying with all his little might to reach the handle. lando comes behind him, scooping him up from behind and holding him near the handle and lock.
“alright, go ahead big boy,” lando urges his son to open the door, and when he does, his excited shrieks are all that fill the house.
“UNCLE LOS!” finn has wiggled out of his fathers’ grasp and already launched himself into carlos’ arms.
“hola, pequeño,” the ferrari driver lets out with a chuckle.
“i so excited you here!” finn is squirming up and down in carlos’ arms as the adults all just laugh at the adorable kid. lando pulls him out of carlos’ arms for one more brief chat about his behavior as you hand carlos the important babysitting list.
“basically, it's all the numbers you don’t already have, like fewtrell and i think my mom, and then his schedule is here,” you continue briefing carlos as lando begins to stand and make his way back to you, “you don’t have to be too strict about this, just have fun,” you assure carlos at the end of the run through.
“i’ve got it, you guys have fun. finn and i sure will,” carlos begins to usher you two out the door, a hyper-active three year old seemingly glued to his leg.
“call if you need anything, and i mean anything,” lando emphasizes to his friend.
“lando. it will be fine, you muppet. go enjoy your night with your wife, i’m going to catch up with mi amigo, finn, here,” at this point he is pushing you and your husband out the door and you both laugh at the door shutting in your faces. lando extends his arm for you to hold with a ‘m’lady’, and you both make your way to the restaurant.
-
at the restaurant, the maître d' guides you to your table and lando proceeds to pull out the chair for you to take your seat. both now seated, he begin to ask what drinks to begin with, lando responding with his and you responding with ‘just a water, please’. walking away to fulfill your orders, lando spares you an odd glance.
“it’s our night off, love. you didn’t want to get a drink?”
“no, just a water will do it for me,” you respond quick, your husband still eyeing you with oddity, “im glad we’re doing this,” you continue, reaching across the table to hold his hand in yours.
“me too, a night just to ourselves was very needed,” he lets out with a smile.
“i just hope our boy isn’t causing too much chaos at home,” you sigh, the waiter coming over to take your orders and drop off your drinks. lando just mumbles a ‘they’ll be fine’ almost to assure himself before placing his order.
-
“vroom! vroom!” finn squeaks out on the floor, rolling his red ferrari cars around the living room. carlos joins in with a laugh, proceeding to hold his own decorated sainz55 car - finn’s most prized possession - and run it around their make-shift track. he quickly pulls out his phone to capture the moment and ease the parents minds.
“finn, look here! it’s for mommy and daddy, smile!” carlos instructs the little boy. finn looks up, letting out a huge smile and giggle, before crawling into the ferrari drivers lap. one more picture - a selfie this time - of finn clinging onto carlos’ neck, and carlos hits a quick send to his friends.
-
“here, honey,” lando pulls his phone out and sends it your way in order for you to also see the adorable array of photos your babysitter had sent.
“well aren’t they having fun?” you place a hand over your heart as you speak, too in awe of the little chubby cheeked smile staring back at you.
“this was a grand idea,” your husband reiterates, putting his phone away into his pocket after typing a response back. you both share a look and a smile, before continuing your previous conversation and finishing your food.
-
making it home a little past finn’s bedtime, you both didn’t know what you would walk into. bedtime was finn’s only struggle, therefore him being awake when you arrived home wouldn’t be out of the ordinary for what both you and your husband expect.
except, when you walk in, your house is clean, quiet, and calm. carlos stands from the couch in order to greet the both of you, while you’re both scrambling to pick your jaws off the floor.
“i’m assuming it went well?” you ask with a laugh while carlos brings you into a light hug.
“si, finn was a gentlemen. he passed out on the couch by seven and i just carried him into his room after that,” you and lando share a look of disbelief before carlos continues, “we played with some cars, ate some dinner, watched a movie, and he went down really easily,”
“can you move in?” lando pops the question into the conversation as carlos laughs off the request, “i’m serious, sainz,” your husband pushes again.
“did you two enjoy your night?” the ferrari driver ignores his friends jokes, directing his attention to you.
“we did, thank you so much for this, carlos,” you respond with a smile, “we really appreciate it,”
carlos gives you another hug goodbye and you begin to make your way towards finn’s room to check on him as lando walks carlos out, continuing his pestering of ‘how did you do it, mate?’ and ‘you don’t understand he hates bedtime’.
you stand in the doorway of your son’s room for some time, admiring the sleepy boy all cozy under his racecar blankets. feeling a hand on your waist, you turn and catch your husband in a kiss.
“let’s go to bed, love,” he offers once you break apart. you give him a silent nod, and you both make your way into your bedroom - lando stealing one last glance at your son.
walking into your bedroom, you discard your heels and begin to unzip your dress.
“ah, ah,” lando stops your movements, replacing your hands on the zipper with his own, “allow me,” you giggle a bit as he continues to unzip your dress, letting it pool onto the floor. he pulls your back into him and begins to pepper your skin with sweet and sensual kisses as you blush in his hold, “we still need to make baby number two,” he mumbles into your skin while continuing his kisses. your body stiffens, lando feeling and understanding the tension releases your body and turns you to face him.
“what is it, y/n? do you not want another baby anymore?” he asks quietly, as if he’s scared of your answer.
“no, no. it’s not that,” you reply, head hanging down to stare at your feet.
“then what is it?” lando cups your chin in his hands with his question, forcing you to meet his eyes.
“it’s just that,” you sigh, searching lando’s eyes, “we don’t need to keep trying, if there’s already a baby on the way,”
#babyfinnseries#baby finn#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#carlos sainz jr x reader#ln4#lando norris x reader#carlos sainz jr fanfic#lando norris imagine#lando norris#charles leclerc imagine#lando norris fanfic#mclaren#formula 1#mclaren f1#lando norris x you#lando norris x y/n#lando norris icons#lando norris x oc#lando norris x wife!reader#dad!lando norris x reader#dad!lando norris#lando x reader#max fewtrell#lando imagine#landonorris#ln4 smut#ln4 x reader#ln4 imagine
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A Mutual Hatred
Dark!Gojo Satoru x reader
finally kicking out the fic that’s been a draft for three years:) ahaha...aha...ha if its obvious this was written for another character...no it wasn’t
(Warnings: implied non-con, implied drugging, college!AU, dark content)
Gojo Satoru did not like you.
He didn’t make it obvious. But, you could see the way he slowly inched away from you. And the fake fake smile he stretched on his lips anytime he was forced to talk to you.
It was a little offensive. You never obsessed about people liking you, but the fact that someone super popular would rather not exist when you were around...well, it stung.
It could’ve been worse. At least he didn’t openly admit his hatred of you. It was just the tiny, little things he did that made you know there were boundaries.
But you weren’t Gojo’s friend, you were Geto’s friend. Which meant, as much as you’d rather not to go the party celebrating their latest win, you were still dragged anyway.
A loud cheer erupted across from the room. Still nursing your drink, you gave Geto a look.
“The baseball team,” He sighed, “Shit, sorry. I didn’t know they were gonna be here. I know they’re fucking crazy but they won’t bother you. I promise.”
You have to laugh at his genuinely apologetic look. You wave him away.
“It’s fine,” You say, “I don’t mind, Besides, they look....fun.”
Your words come a bit too late as you spot the team captain trying to do a handstand on top of an extremely fragile vase. That would end well.
“I’m glad they’re supportive of you, at the very least,”
Geto is sighing, ready to apologize again. He promised you this would be low-key, just the basketball team and a few mutual friends.
Now it’s just the basketball team, along with a hundred other people.
If anything you’re impressed at how quickly the numbers formed. The music was loud, booming, nearly blowing out your ears. People were dancing, at the very least, moving together in disjointed clumps because you are pretty sure alcohol doesn’t help you with dancing.
Voices tear you away from the scene, and your gaze settles on Geto’s volleyball squad. They eagerly start to wave him over. He shakes his head. You frown.
“Don’t babysit me,” You tell him, “Go. Have fun.”
He gives you a look. You roll your eyes.
“I promise I’ll be fine. The only reason I’m here is for the free beer.”
You’re planning on throwing your cup of cheap booze away the second you can, but you don’t want him to think he has to guard you for the night. That’s who Geto is, a self-proclaimed protector. You don’t even know him all that well but he’s still more than happy to forfeit hanging out with his friends to sit here with you. He’s a good person.
You still can’t understand why a guy like him would ever be friends with Gojo.
They had been childhood friends. Best friends. Stayed together until college. Maybe it was just proximity that kept them so close, because you couldn’t imagine it were their personalities.
Geto sighs, reluctantly slipping away.
“If you need anything, lemme know.” You nod, keeping your smile on as he gives you one last look before joining his friends.
Finally alone, you drop the cup in the trash as soon as you can.
At least, you thought you were alone.
“Too strong?”
You jump at his voice. Gojo tilts his head, gazing at you with pretty blue eyes. His glasses are off tonight.
“I-” you stumble, not really sure what to say. He was going out of his way to talk to you? “I was just-”
“Don’t worry, I get it,” he laughs, light and airy and you’re starting to get why he has a fanclub, “Nazumaki has shitty tastes. Wanna try what I’m having?”
He hands you an opened can. Still a bit confused, you accept. It’s slightly better. With a fruity aftertaste. When you go to hand it back, he waves you off.
“Take it, I gotta’ drive home.” He reasons.
Not wanting to look a gift horse in the mouth, you accept. This was...weird. Really really weird. Gojo Satoru didn’t like you. Not even the slightest. Then, why was he being so...nice?
Or maybe you had it all wrong? You were overreacting?
“Congrats on winning your game.” You tell him, when the silence stretches on for far too long.
“Yeah,” he responds, “you went?”
You shake your hade.
“Too busy,” you responded sheepishly, “but I watched the highlights. You guys were awesome.”
“A huge improvement from fall semester.” he agrees. “Fuck, you should’ve seen us those first couple of weeks. Like a bunch of....coked up squirrels or something. Horrible passes, jumping all over the place, just-”
He’s cut off by your laugh. “I’m sorry...coked up squirrels?”
“You didn’t see our freshmen,” he argues, “It’s a great analogy.”
“I’ll take your word for it.” You smile.
It’s definitely the alcohol. On his part too. But conversation flows like you are two old friends. It’s so easy to talk to him. Laugh with him. For a moment, you almost forgotten how much disdain Gojo Satoru used to show you.
Almost.
“You know....for a while, I thought you hated me.” You confessed, because you had to bring it up eventually. The suspense was killing you, eating you alive.
“What?”
“I mean.” The floor looks weird. You don’t like the carpet. “On campus, you were always so stand-offish. Like you were mad at me.”
He shoots you an amused look. “I didn’t hate you. I guess I was kinda’ just pissed.”
You scrunch your forehead, “Oh, you were? Why?”
“’Cuz you had a nice ass and I wasn’t allowed to touch it.”
You blink. And then the world tilts sideways.
What?
Hands grip your shoulders, holding you upright.
“Woah, baby. I think you had a bit too much. Let’s go lay down.” Gojo purrs into your ear, as he starts leading you away.
You weren’t drunk. You knew that. You barely had anything. You make a meager struggle against his unwavering body as your dazed mind starts to piece what’s happening.
You nearly stumble into another group of people. Gojo takes the reigns immediately, apologizing on behalf of his ‘drunk friend who doesn’t know limits’. It’s so deranged that at one point you’re convinced you’re having an out-of-body experience. That this isn’t real. A dream. A nightmare.
But this is real. He shows you the moment he shoves you into a closet, shutting the door behind him.
“Wh-what are you doing-” your pleas are interrupted by soft lips. You’ve never once thought about kissing Gojo but his lips are like pillows. It’s his strength that suffocates you. Biting and licking up your blood.
“Would’ve done this sooner, but your bodyguard would never leave you alone for long. The bastard. Keeping you all to himself.”
Bodyguard? He’s kissing you again, groping you through your clothes and you can’t stand to even think. Geto, it eventually clicks. His helpful protectiveness. You-you thought he was like that with everyone.
Something, a second wind maybe, kicks up at you. You struggle against his large hands. Gojo grunts, as though your desperation was a minor inconvenience for him.
“Stop it, fucking stop.” He hisses, pulling at your hair. You yelp. “Stop fighting this when we both know you-”
The door opens, swinging in blaring light and the sounds of the party with it. Satoru stills, blinking up at the newcomer. You look up too, heart crackling with relief.
Geto stands there, chest heaving, and it takes a minute for you to realize he must have ran here. You open your mouth, nothing but a warbled plea comes out.
You expect him to do something. To grab Gojo by the hair and pull. To save you.
But he doesn’t. He just stands there.
When you search his eyes. You don’t find anger. You just see hunger.
Gojo’s pretty laugh rings through the air. Undisturbed. Expectant.
“What took you so long?”
#dark content#dark#dark Gojo satoru#Dark Gojo Satoru x reader#yandere#yandere jjk#drugging#tw:drugging#yandere gojo satoru x reader#Yandere Gojo Satoru
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hilson episode masterlist
s1e5 damned if you do - house and wilson spend christmas together
s1e10 histories - wilson asks house to treat a patient
s1e18 babies & bathwater - vogler tries to get house removed from the hospital staff
s2e5 daddy's boy - $5000 is exchanged, wilson and house get dinner with house's parents
s2e7 all in - poker night benefit at ppth
s2e16 safe - prank war!
s2e19 house vs god - wilson tries to attend house's poker nights
s3e7 son of a coma guy - road trip and wilson interrogates house about stealing his pad, "maybe i don't want to push this until it breaks"
s3e22 resignation - wilson and house dose each other with ssris/speed
s4e1 alone - wilson kidnaps house's guitar
s4e3 97 seconds - "i love you", house helps wilson out of a funk
s4e12 don't ever change - house tries to break up amber and wilson
s4e16 wilson's heart - angst with a capital "A"
s5e4 birthmarks - wilson drags house to his father's funeral
s5e11 joy to the world - wilson bets house he can't receive a present from a patient
s5e15 the social contract - "does it bother you that we don't have a social contract?", wilson visits his brother
s5e23 "under my skin" - wilson tries to help house figure out his hallucinations
s6e3 epic fail - house tries out some new hobbies, wilson's along for the ride
s6e7 known unknowns - wilson is set to give a speech at an oncology conference
s6e10 wilson - "if you die, i'm alone"
s6e11 the down low - gay chicken
s6e13 moving the chain - house and wilson fight over their bathtub, leading to a prank war
s6e15 private lives - "be not afraid"
s6e16 black hole - house challenges wilson to furnish their apartment himself
s6e21 baggage - house moves out
s8e20 post mortem - wilson forces house out on a road trip
s7e5 unplanned parenthood - wilson and house struggle with babysitting
s7e19 last temptation - chicken bet
s8e2 transplant - house tries to win back wilson's affections
s8e14 love is blind - wilson, house, and house's mom shenanigans
s8e19 the c word - house takes care of wilson
s8e21 holding on - house is desperate for wilson to stay
s8e22 everybody dies - finale
#i finished season 8 so here's the masterlist as promised#big thank you to everyone who engaged with the last post and gave me suggestions <3 love u guys#i miss the show already so much i want to . die......#hilson#house md#james wilson#gregory house#text#mine
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babysitting duties 𖦹 LN4
PAIRINGS: lando norris x female!reader
SUMMARY: who knew that babysitting your four-year-old niece would make you feel things and imagine a life with lando, with a kid and family of your own.
AUTHOR’S NOTE: all these lando interactions with kids in my fyp got me, so here you go. hope you enjoy this one! :)
REMINDERS: this is purely fiction, the way how the character is portrayed in my story does not reflect the person that is portraying my character in real life. always separate fiction from reality, and do not repost or copy my work in any way.
WORD COUNT: 1.2k
WARNINGS: typos, photos grabbed from pinterest, inaccuracies of the photos, and baby fever
It was a busy race week, but it didn’t stop you and Lando from taking on a new role as temporary guardians. Your brother and his wife are currently away for a business trip, and flew their four-year-old daughter, Chloé, to Monaco to be in your care for three weeks, so that’s basically a whole month with her. Chloé had quickly become attached to both of you, especially Lando, who had easily embraced the added responsibility very proudly. Now, she’s living with you both in your shared apartment in Monaco, and despite the busyness of the race week, she was certainly coming along for the ride.
You entered the paddock hand in hand with Lando, while he was carrying Chloé in his arms, balancing her weight effortlessly as if he’d done it a hundred times before, with her tiny arms wrapped around his neck. Chloé, with her bright eyes and boundless curiosity, had become an instant star amongst the paddock. She was also dressed to coordinate with you and Lando, with miniature personalized ear defenders completing the whole ensemble. You couldn’t help but laugh at how effortlessly she charmed everyone around her.
“She looks so much like you two!” Someone exclaimed as you passed by. Lando quickly gave you a playful nudge.
“Well, we do make a good-looking family, don’t we?” He said cheekily, sending you a wink. You couldn’t help but laugh at the idea of rolling with the misconception that Chloé was your daughter suddenly became amusing for you.
“You two look like a proper happy family, eh?” Carlos teased as he approached, grinning mischievously, and giving Chloé a high five.
Lando chuckled, glancing over at you with a playful smirk. “Maybe we should let them think that, huh?”
You playfully rolled your eyes and chuckled, “you really have a knack for stirring the media, don’t you?”
“Anything to keep them in their toes.” You all laughed. “Let them have their field day. They want headlines, then let them eat this up.” He added.
Chloé, oblivious to the whole conversation that is going on, tapped Lando’s shoulder gently. “Can we see the cars now, Uncle Lan?”
He ruffled her hair and pressed a soft kiss on her temple. “In a bit, Koko. First, we have to make sure that Uncle Lan wins this weekend.” She giggled, her innocent laughter melting the hearts of the people around.
As the three of you continued through the paddock, other drivers couldn’t help but stop and coo at her and with Lando joking that Chloé should call Fernando ‘grandpa nando’, in which the older didn’t mind, and find Chloé a very wonderful kid. She even got Oscar to play with her, pretending to race alongside her as she ran towards him, he got Chloé to behave like a car, and squealed so hard with laughter, clearly enjoying every second of her playful interaction with Oscar.
Then Max came over, pretending to be serious but a soft smile was threatening to break through. “I didn’t know you two had a secret kid. When did this happen?”
You laughed, shaking your head. “She’s my niece. But for the thrill of it, let’s start some rumors.”
“Could’ve fooled me! You three looked like a picture-perfect family.” Max smirked, “she’s too cute not to be yours, mate.”
“See?” Lando chimed in, nudging you lightly with his elbow. “Told you, we’re a great team. Maybe we should borrow her every race weekend, love. Just to keep everyone guessing.”
“Yeah and I’ll get an earful from my brother in return for making her miss Kumon just to attend a race weekend with us.” You laughed, shaking your head.
Chloé had asked to be brought down from Lando’s arms, wanting to walk, and now, she’s swinging between the two of you, and you couldn’t help but smile at the way Lando looked at her. Lando had always been really great with kids, but seeing him in this light, with Chloé, felt like something deeper. There was an unspoken ease in the way he handled it, as if it wasn’t a huge leap from where you both already were.
Just then, Charles strolled over, taking a good look at the three of you. “A mini Norris already?! This weekend just got more interesting, huh?”
Before you could reply, Chloé pointed at Charles’s shirt. “I like your red shirt!” She announced, earning a laugh from everyone around.
Charles knelt down to her height, his eyes lighting up with genuine affection. “Thank you! I like your ear defenders. Maybe one day you’ll be in the car too?”
She beamed, nodding with all the confidence in the world. “I will! And I’ll beat Uncle Lan!”
You all burst into laughter, and Lando playfully feigned shock. “Whoa, hold on! You’re supposed to be on my side!”
“Koko is really adorable.” Charles smiled as he put out a hand for Chloé to high five, “can Uncle Charles get a hug?” She giggled and ran up to Charles, her tiny arms wrapping around his neck.
You smiled, watching the scene unfold, heart full from how she effortlessly fit into this world. It was sweet, chaotic, and somehow, everything just felt right. But honestly, all of this is making you feel a little bit of a baby fever.
The day continued on and more drivers stopped by to say hello, each of them being enamored. Even some of the team staff were swooning over how adorable she runs towards Lando and climbing to sit on his lap during brief moments in the garage. Lando even gently placed her inside his car, much to her delight. Chloé’s eyes sparkled as she explored the cockpit and touched the steering wheel, her giggles echoing through the garage. The whole team watched it all with fond smiles, exchanging knowing looks.
Chloé continued to win everyone’s heart, even joining Lando in signing autographs, and each time a fan got their merch signed, she’d beam proudly and say, “I helped!”
At one point, Toto passed by, taking one look at the three of you and shaking his head with an amused grin. “You two should just get married already and have one of your own. This one suits you.”
You blushed, the thought of you and Lando getting married and having a child of your own. Stammering out a response as Lando laughed beside you. “Oh no, we’re…we’re just babysitting.”
“Sure,” Toto said with a knowing wink before walking away.
By the time the day came to an end, Chloé had fallen asleep in Lando’s arms, her tiny body curled up against him. You glanced over and saw how tenderly Lando held her, stroking her hair softly. Witnessing this scene had made your heart flutter and melt.
“You know,” Lando said quietly, not wanting to wake her, “if this is what having a family looks like…I wouldn’t mind having one someday with you.”
You smiled, feeling your chest tighten with a mix of emotions. “Someday,” you agreed, leaning in to kiss him on the lips and him meeting you halfway.
For now, this was enough—an amazing race weekend, Chloé, and the unexpected joy of playing family for a little while. It was sweet, it was funny, and it was everything you didn’t know that you needed.
yourusername
liked by landonorris, yourbrother, yoursisterinlaw, oscarpiastri, lilyzneimer and 67,938 others
tagged: landonorris
yourusername when koko is in monaco ✨ on babysitting duties while the parents are away! yourbrother & yoursisterinlaw 💗
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username1 GIRL DAD LANDO!!!!
username2 not her decking lando’s car with stickers 😭😭😭😭
yourbrother so the little monster went karting, huh ♥︎ liked by the author
yourusername yep, she has been BEGGING landonorris 😭😭😭 you might have a future racer in your hands soon 😆
yourbrother should we start saving now? 🙂↕️
landonorris oh you should, mate. koko’s got some talent
yourbrother 🙂↕️🙂↕️🙂↕️
yourusername oh come on u drama queen, not like you can’t afford it 🤥 also lan asked if koko can join us every race weekend 😂
yourbrother ?????? make your own ?????? she can’t miss her kumon
landonorris what do you say, love? 🤩
yourusername marry me first??? 🤨
landonorris won’t be a problem 🤪
yourbrother already asking her to marry you, when you haven’t gotten our blessing yet? 🤨
landonorris working on it!
yourusername 😭😭😭😭
landonorris she’s (and our future kids) the only one allowed that can deck my car in stickers ♥︎ liked by the author
yourusername already thinking about the future, huh 🤨🤨🤨🤨
landonorris ofc??? you’re the only one that i want to spend my life with, woman
yourusername aw, lan 🥺 i love you 🫶🏻
landonorris i love you more 🤪❤️
username3 not this post and all the comments calling me single 😔
username4 HER KART NUMBER IS LANDO’S NUMBER TOO 🥹🥹🥹
lilyzneimer it was a pleasure meeting koko! she’s such a pure sweetheart! 🥺💗 ♥︎ liked by the author
yourusername she’s happy to meet you too, lils! when we got home, she asked me when can she meet you again 😆
lilyzneimer omggg what a sweet baby! i’ll visit you guys in monaco before she heads back home to france! ❤️
yourusername ofc! just beep me anytime 🫶🏻
username5 SHES DEFINITELY THE STAR OF THE PADDOCK!!!!
yoursisterinlaw thank you so much for babysitting koko, you’re the best! 🥺❤️ ♥︎ liked by the author
yourusername anytime!!! she’s such an angel ❤️
yoursisterinlaw you and lando are both life savers! i hope she’s not giving you a hard time
yourusername oh nooo, she’s such a good kid!
yoursisterinlaw thank you! we’ll see you by the end of the month ❤️ ♥︎ liked by the author
username6 oh i can already imagine the moment y/n and lando have their own kids 🥹
username7 lando is born to be a girl dad!!!!
username8 he’s gonna be the BEST dad
username9 NOT OSCAR MAKING KOKO ACT LIKE A CAR LMFAO THE EXACT SAME THING HE DID BACK WHEN HE WAS A KID 😭😭😭
username10 y/n and lando being the fun and cool aunt and uncle 🥺🫶🏻
username11 HER PUTTING STICKERS ON LANDO’S CAR IS SO CUTE WTF 😭
username12 lando with kids is definitely top tier, chef’s kiss
#f1#formula 1#formula one#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#formula 1 fanfic#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 x reader#lando norris#lando norris 4#ln4#lando norris x female!reader#lando norris smau#lando norris x you#lando norris x reader#lando norris x y/n#lando norris fic#lando norris fanfic#lando norris imagine#ln4 x y/n#ln4 one shot#ln4 imagine#ln4 fic#ln4 x reader#ln4 fluff#ln4 x you
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Dear, writter
May i've a request for Thomas hewitt, Bubba Sawyer,bo Sinclair, Lester Sinclair, and Vince Sinclair, With a hot wife fem reader, I want to see their life being a father to a hot fem reader. Because that is my dream. 💫Fluff💫
Please.... Your writing is so gorgeous 💋💋 master 🌹🌹🌹
Thank you so much
From your followers:
@kawaistrawberry21
awww i'm glad you like my writing!! hopefully you enjoy this :D
SLASHERS with a F! S/O who is their hot wife
THOMAS HEWITT
Everyone in town was shocked when you and Thomas got married
Thomas included but he never said anything about it
His family thought you were way out of his league, Hoyt was never afraid to comment on this to your face
But you love Thomas, he was a good man
So when he'd finally, finally, proposed to you, of course you'd said yes
When he found out you were having his child? He was over the moon
Luda May was almost as overjoyed, already making arrangements for the baby's room, making clothes, etc
She couldn't wait to be a grandmother and Thomas couldn't wait to be a father
When the baby's due date was getting closer, you could tell Thomas was nervous about if the baby would come out looking like him
But you reassured him that, no matter what your baby looked like, you would love it the same way you loved him
He was good with the baby, so gentle and patient, always happy to help when it cried
If Hoyt ever tried to give either of you a hard time, Thomas actually violently defended you, sometimes tossing Hoyt across the room with one arm
He'd never let anything hurt you or your baby
BUBBA SAWYER
Like Thomas, everyone was surprised when you and Bubba got married
Though his family were far more excited about it! After all, their brother was quite the catch
You got along well with his family even before you moved in, with Chop Top and Nubbins always commenting to Bubba how lucky he was to have such a hot wife
It always made your husband get all flustered, babbling soft nonsense. He was cute
When you got pregnant, Bubba and the Sawyer family were over the moon
Family was extremely important to them and they were happy for you and Bubba
When Nubbins made a very ugly little hat for the baby, you accepted it but told him gently it'd be too big for their head but that you'd grow into it. He was excited about that prospect
Chop Top and Drayton helped Bubba set up the nursery so you could just relax
And when the baby was born, Bubba was so scared of holding something so fragile and precious
But you helped him, guiding his arms to hold the baby, and he was in shock and awe
He'd never thought he'd get married, much less to someone as gorgeous as you, and have a child together
Bubba was a nervous father, usually letting your kid get away with anything so you had to be the rule-setter when it came to the kid
His brothers were menaces when it came to babysitting their niece or nephew
But both you and Bubba were happy. He'd protect you both, no matter what
BO SINCLAIR
Honestly? This was a major win in Bo's mind
If you think he doesn't show off for you, you're wrong. That man takes every opportunity to
He also definitely flexed to his brothers about scoring the hottest wife ever
Of course, his brothers were very nice and respectful with you, though Bo wouldn't let them be too friendly
He's got a jealousy streak
Whenever visitors arrive to Ambrose, he's always got his arm around you or bragging about you when you're not around
He's whipped, you've got him wrapped around your finger
But when you tell him your pregnant, you're shocked at how scared he becomes
Of course, he doesn't show it visibly, but you know your husband and you can tell when he's nervous about something
Eventually, when he starts trying to pull away from you, you corner him and make him talk
Some yelling and fighting ensues but he caves, confessing he's scared he wouldn't be a good father. I mean, he didn't exactly have the best role model and he didn't want you or your babies to suffer for it
But you reminded him you were in this together and he'd relax a little
You had twins, because of course you did, but this only seemed to make Bo all the more anxious
He didn't exactly... know what to do with a baby? He'd never really been around infants so he's looking to you for help on this one
When they're a bit older though, he'll let them hang out in the auto shop with him when he works
One day you come home to find him asleep on the couch with the twins curled up on his chest and you just melt
He's a good dad and a good husband
VINCENT SINCLAIR
Vincent was shocked you'd said yes when he proposed
He didn't consider himself attractive in the slightest but you said yes?!
I mean, you were stunning, he'd stared at you constantly even when you were dating and it certainly didn't stop when you were married
Bo and Lester were definitely jealous, teasing him to see him get flustered over how lucky he was
Unlike Bo, when he found out you were pregnant, he was excited
Nervous, absolutely, but everyone is nervous when they're having their first kid
He's so wary for you though, nearly had you on bedrest the entire pregnancy because he feared the worst
One time he caught you standing on a chair to reach something and he nearly had a conniption
But the twins came - because of course they were twins - and were healthy and beautiful
Vincent is so gentle with them, like they're the most precious things in the world to them
He makes little wax sculptures for their room to decorate it
Definitely encourages and supports creative hobbies for the kids! He gets them finger paints and crayons and the like
You've woken up in the night because of the babies crying but Vincent is already up, ready to help
Vincent's mastered carrying them both with an arm each and its very cute
Sometimes you catch him holding one of the twins and humming softly to them as they sleep in his arms, just swaying together in the kitchen
You feel so lucky but he feels even luckier to have you and your kids
LESTER SINCLAIR
Lester is by far the most... stable? So you'd been instantly drawn to that about him
He'd always get so flustered, bringing you flowers and blushing like a madman while you were dating
It took him the longest to propose to you though, he always felt like you were waaaay out of his league
Visitors came and would gawk at you and he'd feel a twinge of jealousy at the reminder that yeah, you could have anyone
But he did propose to you and you said yes because you wanted him, not anyone else
Neither of you had any shame in PDA, often holding hands or kissing in front of visitors
You lived with Lester and Jonesy in a little house on the outskirts of the town, surrounded by trees and very peaceful compared to the horrors of Ambrose
It had actually been Lester who suggested having a kid or two running around. After all, he had two older brothers so he was used to that business in a house with lots of people living in it
Over time, the two of you would have two kids, but they weren't twins
Lester was a good dad too! He was attentive and loving but he didn't let them get away with too much
He'd teach them how to shoot when they were a bit older because it was a fond memory he had with his own dad
Of course, Lester didn't have the best dad to draw comparison to
But at least he knew what not to do. Surely that counted for something?
You'd come home from working a short shift to find Lester and the kids playing in the backyard, running about with Jonesy as they played soccer
Both you and Lester would do anything for your kids and you knew he'd do anything for you
#🔪 creeps writes#slasher x reader#slasher fanfiction#slasher x s/o#house of wax#bo sinclair x reader#vincent sinclair x reader#lester sinclair x reader#bo sinclair#vincent sinclair#lester sinclair#the texas chainsaw massacre#bubba sawyer#bubba sawyer x reader#thomas hewitt#thomas hewitt x reader#leatherface x you
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