#I want things to get better again. but they'll get worse after that anyway. I'm so tired of these cycles

[neverendingford]

.

[fischlcatgirl]

okay here are my thoughts about genshin at the moment. i have been not making this post for a little bit because it. pisses me off.

I don't know what the fuck they think they're doing with these characters. HONESTLY. yes the state of them was getting worse gradually. it doesn't take a genius to figure out that when part of a character's draw is how strong they are, in order to get people to buy more and more characters, they have to get stronger and stronger.

but what felt before like a gradual incline turned into a fucking cliffside when natlan dropped and mualani was released at a similar power level to neuvillette (who had just just just powercrept every other hydro dps) WITHOUT the same investment or supports he needed.

The problem I think really is not the character kits themselves. It's not that they're out of ideas. It's just that the multipliers are fucking crazy. and to be frank!! I don't think i've seen one person who is happy with the direction things seem to be going.

i can't deny that there are a lot of good older characters and i wouldn't try to. I am. and perhaps will forever be. a fischl main. (all things considered a very lucky main pick. i considered xinyan) But i am annoyed by ccs who will try to tell you that international is still perfectly abyss viable. like girl. go play international then. go play kokomi taser. go play morgana.

content that should be designed to be challenging mechanically is NOT because it's way easier and more profitable to create a situation where the game looks you dead in the face and goes. drop 2000$ for c2 mauvika and citlali and just kill the enemies before they 1-shot you. otherwise enjoy the next half hour of restarting the chamber.

the fact that they changed the rules for the chronicled wish to put shenhe on rather than let go of hu tao, especially when they have arlecchino right there to give as many regular reruns as they want, is particularly scummy. especially after over a year of shenhe not having a rerun. incredibly nasty. just a flagrant display of how little they care about the feelings of their players as compared to their bottom line.

They're a business. Whatever. That doesn't make it cool or right.

I love genshin's story. I'm concerned for its direction. I'm concerned for the writing of its characters. Maybe I'm missing something, but Mualani's hydro vision doesn't represent jack shit in terms of a duality of character. Citlali could have been absolutely fascinating but has instead been reduced to a tusundre love interest for the traveller to a degree they didn't even inflict on Ayaka. We're supposed to see playable Skirk soon-ish, which I would love to be excited about but tbh with how they handled citlali (another woman who is hundreds of years old and incredibly powerful) I am preparing myself for disappointment.

WHICH SUCKS! I love genshin! I love it! I think that it started out a good game, and that it could be a good game again. Who knows? Maybe natlan will be the character-release equivalent of inazuma's story quest: kind of bad, but with much better things after it. Maybe they'll finally start running three characters at once. Maybe Childe will come back and I will forget my troubles again. I will quit genshin once it becomes virtually unplayable, or once they start releasing doubles of the same character, whichever comes first.

tldr; natlan powercreep needs to end and i really hope they don't fumble any more characters like they did citlali, but ultimately i still really like genshin and want to know where it is going.

anyway, if you got to the end of this long ass post i would love to know what you think and I would LOVE to talk about genshin i will do it until the sun comes up in the west. please talk to me about genshin

[spacelesbiandisasterii]

New story idea that I don't know when I'll write!!!

What if Ahsoka had known the Martez sisters when she was still a Jedi? Maybe right after Ziro's scape?

I'm thinking something along the lines of: after Ziro scape from prison (and killed the Martez parents in the process) protest start to happen all along Coruscant. Some of these protesters want the end of the war, o even just that the Jedi were removed from the war effort (perhaps bc of Senhora Martez/Trace and Rafa mother death specifically? I kinda imagine her being a community leader, someone that helps underworld people get away from crime and poverty to live a honest live on Curuscant. And then she dies and her people blame the Jedi for it. Senhora Martez was doing what the Jedi should but never bother do and now she's gone bc a Jedi throw a freaking ship at her house) but some of the protesters are actually separatist and want to remove the republic from Curuscant bc they feel the republic never done any good for them anyway.

Because of this last one the Jedi were actually force into go down into the lowest level for the first time in a very long period, not only that, but they are bringing the clones this time around! Trying to pacify Curuscant, but also interfering with the lives of common folk in the area.

Note about that part: I grown up on Rio de Janeiro (the state not the city) in a favela. You gringo must had heard stories about how dangerous favelas bc of the drug cartels are and shit like that, this is the general public discuss here as well. In MY person experience, it wasn't that bad most of the time. At least on the one I lived, but that's my experience live in one favela from the dozens that exist on Rio, thing can be different for other people or other places, please don't generalize my beautiful country with what I'm saying right now. The crime organization had some level of order, there's unspoken rules about them not messing with people that lived on the neighborhood unless we messed with them first and things like this. BUT things quickly become bad when the police show up with the excuse of "saving" us. The police didn't care about messing with "civilians" (for the lack of better word) and we're always very violent. I have seen more people die to police brutality than from the actual cartels and the cartels are really bad, just not as bad as policeman. I'm talking about this bc it's kinda how I imagine the lower levels of Coruscant being. Living on Hutt or Pike territory sucks, but the police manages to be way worst and the Jedi and Clones ARE the police in this scenario. A lot of what they'll do would be based about my experience. Which again IT'S NOT UNIVERSAL!!!!

Skyguy and Snips are one of these cops Jedi that go down there, and that's how Ahsoka meets Trace and Rafa and gets to know how the lack of action of the Jedi affect their lives, and how now that the Jedi are finally were things manage to be worse.

Ahsoka would had to deal with the fact that the Jedi she admire so much (Anakin, Luminara even Barriss) committed acts that were very "Jedi like", she would get disenchanted with the order and find other Jedis that were also feeling like these (Barriss) while dealing with knew and old feelings she tried to repressed.

It's a love triangle turn into something else!

Anyway, what are y'all thought on this one?

[terrence-silver]

How would terry silver react if he was just passing by somewhere and overheard his beloved one on the phone talking to someone and saying something like "I don't care about that old man anyway i'm only with him for his money"

Is this Cheyenne Hamidi speaking?

Because, I mean, Terry would be devastated and he immediately thinks back to every business arrangement type of situationship he's ever had that was purely monetary in nature and how it didn't matter then, because there was no pretense of love there, perhaps, only the vague illusion purely for formality's sake, to keep the charade going. But, now? Now, for once, there's actually love involved and he cares so very deeply, only to be hit with this whole 'It's all for the money' bullcrap all over again, effectively being betrayed, with his vulnerabilities and trust dangerously trampled on and what's worse?

Behind his back? He's being talked of, made fun of, behind his back?

It would be pretty hard to describe the sheer level of mental breakdown Terry would have and how much rage, despair, grief and complete and utter helplessness seeps in through his lack of control, rendering him mortally dangerous.

Beloved wants to be a whore for hire? They want this to be transactional? They want him to pull out the 'Nothing's for free' philosophy? Fair enough. Anything for beloved. After an outpouring of violence, it is highly unlikely beloved ever leaves his mansion or his midst again. They'll be kept in a golden cage, on an enviable postal code, in a rich neighborhood, surrounded by all the lavish, material things money can buy, but they will never be rid of him. This is his spite. His punishment. His vendetta. How he copes with the pain and the rage. His heart being absolutely shattered. This will become their prison and they'll become his hole. A hole in a pretty, branded dress he gets to rip off, a hole on a luxurious bed they get to be fucked on, a hole fed the most expensive foods and a hole served the most exuberant drinks and they should be grateful for that too and that he didn't just end them for what they said. They wanted to be treated like a whore. They said so themselves, out of their own mouth, when they thought nobody's likely to hear. So? He'll treat them like a whore in his vindictiveness and toss them a piece of jewelry or diamonds when he's done because it's all for the money anyway, correct? Irony is, none of this would matter to him all that much if he simply didn't care tremendously about the person; but when he does? He could rip them to bloody shreds and put them through unimaginable suffering simply because he hoped --- he invested emotions into his beloved and now they took a big crap all over it, and that deserves revenge. That one phone call overheard costs beloved more than they've ever bargained for and if at all possible, they're never seen again, because Terry effectively keeps them hostage to his whims, his anger, his lust and his pain, and as I always say, it is simply better if they were just some passing sugar baby in a line up of many. They would be spared a lifetime of tears and agony.

But, considering he loves them?

He sees this as a declaration of total war and beloved as his prisoner.

[notmaplemable]

9 Days Of Lancaster Day 8: Meeting The Family

RJ: *Standing outside the Arc household*

Jaune: Nervous?

Ruby: A little bit.

Jaune: Don't be, they'll love you. And I mean, you meeting my family can't go any worse than me meeting yours.

Ruby: What do you mean? Dad loved meeting you, and Uncle Qrow likes you more than he likes most people.

Jaune: I meant throwing up on Yang.

Ruby: Oh... Yeah, hopefully I can do better than... that.

Jaune: You will. You did great when you met Saph and Terra.

Ruby: But we weren't dating then, and two people are easier to deal with than ten!

Jaune: Well... you aren't wrong.

Ruby: You're supposed to encourage me!

Jaune: I have been.

Ruby: Well I don't feel encouraged!

Jaune: *Sighs* Let's just go meet everyone.

------

Ruby: H-Hello, my name is Rubin Rose!... I mean Robin Rose!... I mean Ronald Rose!... I mean-!

Jaune: This is Ruby.

Ruby: RUBY ROSE!

Mama Arc: *Chuckles* Well aren't you adorable.

Papa Arc: There's no need to be so nervous, Ruby. We've heard a lot about you.

Mama Arc: And if you're anything like your mom, you'll get along with the girls just wonderfully.

Papa Arc: Hopefully.

Jaune: Where is everyone else anyways?

Mama Arc: In the den, we wanted to give Ruby a little bit of breathing room before we throw her to the wolves. *Chuckles*

Ruby: *Mortified*

Jaune: Thanks mom, really helping her anxiety there.

Mama Arc: Oh I'm just teasing.

Jaune: Tease less, please.

Mama Arc: Oh sure, sure. Let's go introduce her to the girls! *Grabs Ruby's hand and drags her away*

Ruby: Eeep!

Jaune: Oh, boy.

Papa Arc: This is going to be a... fun day.

------

Mama Arc: This is Ruby Rose, Summer's youngest daughter, and Jaune's fiancée! Isn't she just adorable?

Arc girls: *Various forms of yes*

Ruby: H-h-h-hi?

Mama Arc: Now, you already know Saphron and Terra.

Terra: Hello again, Ruby.

Saphron: It's been too long. I like what you're doing with your hair now, though.

Ruby: T-thank you. It's good to see you two again.

Mama Arc: This is Garnet, our oldest.

Garnet: I see you like red a lot.

Ruby: Yeah, it's my favorite color.

Garnet: Well, we have that in common. And from what I've been told about you, I look forward to having you as a little sister.

Ruby: Oh, umm. Thanks?

Mama Arc: This is Jaune's twin sister, Joan.

Joan: It's nice to meet you.

Ruby: It's nice to meet you too, you look a lot like Jaune.

Joan: Except a good bit shorter and a lot less muscular now. *Chuckles* He's changed a lot since he left.

Ruby: Yeah.

Joan: Mostly for the better it seems, and I believe I have you and the rest of his friends to thank for that.

Mama Arc: This is Kelly.

Kelly: So, I hear you like weapons.

Ruby: They're my second most favorite thing in the world.

Kelly: Can you show me some cool weapons sometime?

Ruby: Sure! I mean, if you want me to.

Kelly: I do! This is going to be so awesome!

Mama Arc: This is Livie.

Livie: Sup?

Ruby: Umm, not much?

Livie: Hmm.

Mama Arc: She doesn't talk much, now onto the second set of twins. Milly and Amethyst.

Milly: You seem really cool!

Amethyst: You stole my big brother you harlett!

Ruby: Umm, I don't know what that means.

Milly: She just called you a w-

Mama Arc: And that's enough of that conversation! Let's eat!

------

Several hours later.

Jaune: See, I told you it wouldn't be that bad.

Ruby: Your little sister called me a "harlett".

Jaune: She's just getting used to me dating. It'll all be better after a good night's sleep.

Ruby: Where am I supposed to sleep?

Jaune: We have a ton of guest room you can stay in.

Mama Arc: Actually, I donated all of the beds in the guest room to charity.

Jaune: What? Why?

Mama Arc: It doesnt matter why! *Starts pushing Jaune and Ruby towards Jaune's room* You two can just sleep together in Jaune's room while you're staying here!

Jaune: Mom!

Ruby: *Blushing*

Mama Arc: *Pushes them into the room* Have a good night you two~! *Leaves*

Jaune and Ruby look around at Jaune's room, which is currently lit by several candles with some soft romantic music playing in the background.

Jaune: ...

Ruby: ...

[lemotmo]

She hasn't been answering much of anything these past few weeks but she did answer this today and I have the same Athena concern 😬

Q. Happy new year, Ali! I hope your break has been rejuvenating for you. I'm curious what you think about the lack of anything from the show during the hiatus. Shouldn't they be selling us something? They should be teasing something. It's way too quiet and it's a bad look. We need teasers for the second half of the season.

A. Happy New Year to you as well anon, thank you. The break has been needed and it has been helpful, although I've been sick the last few days so that part sucks, lol. I'm not sure how many hiatuses you have been through but this is actually pretty typical. They aren't doing anything the other ABC shows also on hiatus aren't doing so I'm not sure what you think they need to be doing. The mid season finale didn't end on a 'dun dun dun' type cliffhanger so there's not much to tease. They already filmed episode 9 and probably had episode 10 and maybe 11 written before the break but beyond that I don't even know how much information ABC has to tease beyond the broad strokes of where the storylines will be going. But they've been very spoiler free anyway so I don't see that changing over the break. They definitely don't have any scenes they can tease past episode 9 so there's not much for them to be doing. All I'm asking from this hiatus is for someone from ABC to have gotten ahold of Tim and told him no more side quests. I cannot deal with anymore planned storylines getting redone or pushed out because Tim got sidetracked by a new toy. He needs to be told to stick to his outlines because even his actors were unsure of what to tease or even if they would be in an episode by the end of 8a and they can't keep letting Tim do that. Especially if they're really going the Buddie route. ABC is going to need to know when things are going to happen for promotional purposes. And my fear is him getting distracted by the kidnapping/ bad cop or whatever plot he has planned for episode 9/10. I don't want him dragging that out simply because I cannot deal with more rogue cop Athena. I desperately need an Athena break. And I don't want the Eddie/Christopher stuff to happen off screen just so he can have more cop Athena scenes. Given Tim's interviews I'm also not sure when exactly things are happening. Maddie can't be in too much danger if Buck's focus is on Eddie leaving so I'm guessing that will only last one episode and Maddie gets taken at the end of episode 9? But then that doesn't fit with Jennifer's interview that made it sound like they already filmed her scenes for the kidnapping or whatever it is. So the timeline is wonky right now. We also had Tim saying that Buck's abandonment issues will be worse following episode 10, so I'm guessing Eddie does go to El Paso and maybe Maddie goes missing after? But then we also had the time jump one of the interviews teased, which is bizarre in and of itself. None of that makes sense so the information is all over the place and I'm not even sure how much of it is accurate. We just have to wait and see, anon, but they are not doing anything out of the ordinary for this hiatus. I'm thankful for the quiet right now 😉.

Thank you Nonny! Much appreciated! What a nice New Year's surprise in my askbox. 😋🤗

I have to admit that I've been enjoying this hiatus immensely and it isn't all that much different from other hiatuses we've had in the past. In fact, this one is infinitely better than the last one we had, because at least now we know for sure that T is gone. So I definitely agree with Ali here.

As for what to expect for 8b? I haven't a clue and I'm not in the mood to speculate right now. I want to wait until they start filming again and when they'll start teasing again with interviews.

But just like Ali I really do hope that Tim will stick to the story he has written and we'll get some nicely balanced episodes where everyone gets featured in equal amounts.

I have nothing more to add here, just that everyone should start enjoying this break more. Who knows what is coming for us in 8b? I have a feeling we'll be put through the wringer when it comes to characters being in danger and NDEs. Who knows what Tim has planned for Buddie? So yeah, enjoy the calmness of this hiatus as long as you can. 😊

Heads up! For anyone who is giving me the shifty eyes for reposting Ali's updates instead of reblogging. Read this.

Remember, no hate in comments, reblogs or inboxes. Let's keep it civil and respectful. Thank you.

If you are interested in more of Ali’s posts, you can find all of her posts so far under the tag: anonymous blog I love.

[leighlew3]

Hey I'm interested in how the industry works and how it's slowing down atm, could you give some insights?

Welp. Buckle up...

Between tech bros and tech bro appeasers taking over the industry, the streaming model (an initially positive thing that's been twisted into something obviously not always so great), the pandemic, and the strike, plus the ever present political and global upheaval which has investors/banks biting nails -- Hollywood is not in a good place, and it's being run further and further into the ground by people afraid to take any risks or spend any money -- worse than ever.

That means less specs being bought, less movies being made, less shows being greenlit, and so on. Productions in LA have fallen to historic lows (because what IS being made is increasingly being taken elsewhere for tax credits and lower cost). Output and employment is just not great. And of course fans have become more selective and most studios and executives are simply not remotely on the same page with audiences and viewers anymore and relying too much on algorithms and skewed data (and allowing hateful anti-“woke” mobs to review bomb and doom anything fresh) and then wondering why even their big blockbusters are flopping now as well.

This was supposed to be the year the industry started to bounce back after the pandemic and strike, and while it's gotten better than it was when it was completely at a standstill, and yes movies and tv are still being made, it's just not good. It's not remotely where it should be, let alone anywhere near the level it was pre-pandemic. And even pre-pandemic, we were already seeing a lot of these problems starting to rear their heads...

I mean in the 90s and early 2000s a straight white guy could give a one line pitch to a studio and be handed a million bucks to write it. Or write the most basic ass spec and make a cool couple million for the sale. But now, even the straight white guys have to have a project locked and loaded already with attachments (talent, director, producers) already on board. No one want to develop anything. Everyone wants everyone else to do all the work (aka spend all the time and money) first and then maybe they'll buy the package and make the movie, or distribute a finished product. Imagine what that means for mid to lower level projects entirely. And imagine what that especially means for women/POC/LGBTQ creatives.

Anyway, agencies and reps all thought things would start to really get back on track this year, but it hasn't, really. The town-wide motto being said to writers, actors, directors, etc by Spring/Summer was "survive 'til 25". Now, the new motto is "survive through 25". Now everyone is hoping, somehow 2025 will be a solid recovery year and 2026 might be a genuinely good year again. But it just keeps getting pushed back and looking more and more bleak. A lot of writers, showrunners, etc -- successful ones and newbies alike, are just flat out leaving or preparing to leave the industry entirely, if they haven't already.

And people who are considering making writing, acting, or crew work a career are being flat out told "now is not the time, don't come to Hollywood, don't try to make this a career because there's just not enough work right now, and the career might not exist at all soon". And that's... pretty yikes.

Look, Hollywood has ALWAYS endured. It survived the Great Depression, global wars, technological revolutions -- and I actually believe it will survive this era as well.

I'm just not sure what comes out the other side of it...

And that's not even taking into account the role AI will play.

[never-not-ever]

So follow up to that recent post.. and trigger warning in advance. It's a little scary knowing how much more thought I've given it. I still believe that I will take myself to the ER before acting on anything but tonight was a realization that nothing has changed, if anything things have just gotten worse.

I mumbled the words "I could actually kill myself" out loud as I got off the highway near my cousins house. I was crying as I realized this because it was just so sad and this was after thinking of my cats and my ex. I was thinking of writing two notes, one to my Nana and one to my ex which is just mainly for my cats.

****Just another reminder*** .. As much as I think about and type about and vent about, I made a promise to my doctor and I don't know what it is with my lovely fucked up attachment shit with her but I'm not going to break that promise. If the thoughts get too loud I'll go to the ER. I'm always so paranoid that someone is going to do a repeat of the past like when the cops showed up at my house... I just need to vent... but if you're not in a good place right now then you might not want to keep reading..

It wasn't until last night that I started thinking more of the bridge. Then on the way home tonight I took the bridge again. I could have taken the tunnel. I actually did take the tunnel. But that was in the end. I took the bridge, driving on the lower deck, the part that I must have driven over 50 times this past summer, memorizing details, making up a plan that I later talked about to my old therapist who told said to me "that's a very public plan".

This bridge is in the next town over from where I live and last night I started thinking what if I walked there in the middle of the night and walked up the "on ramp"... So last night I got off the bridge and immediately went and got back on taking me back into town, taking me on the upper deck, a part of the bridge I'm not that familiar with. The lower deck, I knew where the pull off parts where. My therapist used to live in nearby towns. It was almost like she was trying to persuade me against this plan when she said how there was always a state trooper on the pull off parts and I without hesitation told her that in the month and a half since I've been out I've only seen a trooper once and I think I was driving over that bridge at least once a day. This was back in September.

Last night I realized not only is the ramp going on to the bridge very long but it is also very well lit and the chances of someone noticing a pedestrian walking and calling 911 is very likely. I noticed last night and I double checked again tonight and on the upper deck there is a pull off spot but it's a bit harder to navigate. As much as I fantasize about this bridge I doubt I would ever have the guts to actually do it. The fear of failure.

I've always told my team that I wouldn't kill myself because I couldn't hurt my Nana like that but then my mind just started wandering off thinking of how old she is and how she's probably going to end up passing away soon anyways. How my in and out of the hospital is just more added stress to her. How much of a disappointment and a burden my life has become.

My boys used to bring me so much happiness and joy but lately not so much. They deserve a better home. Someone, or a couple who will always be there for them and won't disappear for weeks or months, wondering if they'll ever see their owners again.

I keep thinking of this one line, imaging others saying this about me and it's true. "She made one mistake at work and it messed her up for the rest of her life".

I know it's so black and white but right now it's my truth. I will never recover from this. I will never forgive myself for this. I had an amazing job and I made a difference and I had a reason for living, my life meant something. I was a part of an amazing, loving, caring family and I lost that.

Now I have no one. Sure there's some. A few family or friends who will quickly get over it.

Ugh I feel like I'm just going down a rabbit hole. Is that even the term? You can't convince a chronically suicidal person their life is worth living and they need to stay. You just keep they safe. So how much longer can I remain in the outside world before I'm no longer safe?

[satureja13]

Next morning. Jack sneaked out. Ji Ho and Vlad are still sound asleep. The main work of doing their Bond Magic is still on them and it drains them. Despite the devices. Vlad will hate it. He wanted to spare Ji Ho from all this...

Jack went over to the garage to work on their rooms. They need more place to sleep. He is still amazed how easy and fast these machines build furniture and stuff! Out of trash and junk!

Meanwhile Jeb, Saiwa and Kiyoshi went to the kitchen. Jeb insists that Saiwa is cooking today with Kiyoshi - to help him come back... Sai can't get over how Jeb put Kiyoshi over him. Saiwa had always been jealous of Kiyoshi and Jeb. Jeb didn't even hesitate agreeing to their fake relationship! How far will this go?

Jeb dwells on his own thoughs. He knows that Saiwa always had a crush on Kiyoshi. Everyone has. That's just how Kiyoshi is. But he is his best friend and he trusts him unconditionally. And he would do anything to bring him back. Even though Kiyoshi could never tell him much about his duties for the Council, the Resistance and the Temple.

But watching them together makes Jeb think if it was the right decision. What will he do when this fated-mates-thing is true? Did Kiyoshi love Saiwa all the time and just never told them because Kiyoshi knew how much he loved Saiwa? Did he give up on Saiwa so they could be together? Gods - the way Kiyoshi looks at him... Will Jeb be able to give up on Saiwa so Kiyoshi and Saiwa can be together? ö.Ö'

Ji Ho and Vlad eventually got up and they gathered for breakfast. They are so happy to be all together again <3 Ji Ho couldn't avoid to bring up the fact that they'll have to pay back Francine, Rubyn, Dtui and Leander (Vlad growled when he heard Ji Ho mentioning him ^^') for their help. But all of them agreed that they'd happily earn money the best they can to pay back. This place - their home - is more than they could ever hope for! Of course they would work to keep and earn it!

They discussed their possibilities. Jack could sell his amazing nectar, Vlad his paintings... And they'd have to find a way to send their produce to the Muggle World. The Otherworld is populated too sparsely. Jeb: "Vanië, you could start programming again and even develop computer games!" Saiwa: "Uh - I'm good with computers - but there's a lot more to a game than just programming the code. I would have to compose the music and sounds, make up and write the story and dialogues and then all the design stuff and concept art. I can't do any of these things."

If only Saiwa would know some creatures who are capable of all these things... ;) (Vlad is writer, Ji Ho composer and Jack draws ^^')

After breakfast Jack took Ji Ho upstairs. He decorated a room for him.

Ji Ho: "Gods, Jack - this is too much. It even looks better than your room!" Jack: "What? Nothing looks better than my Space House Boat!"

There is even a bathtub at the balcony with view on the river! And Jack even made a corner with all of Ji Ho's music stuff!

Ji Ho: "Thank you, Jack. It's so beautiful!"

Jack: "You have the best view of all of our rooms. Right on the river." Ji Ho: "It's stunning. Wow."

Then they talked a bit about their 'learn how to love lessons' and pondered about how Ji Ho could be able to learn how to love Vlad... Jack: "Let's go to the temple and visit Arturo later. I have to see him anyway, my pain gets worse again. He'll have advice for us." Ji Ho: "I hope so. I hate to see Vlad suffer because of me."

When will you ever learn when there's nowhere left to turn Don't let your spirit burn I'll wait 'till you return

All the dreams that we were building We never lived them We could lose it, we should use it Lessons in love - Level 42

From the Beginning  ~  Underwater Love ~  Latest 🛺 'Home happy Home' from the beginning ▶️ here 📚 Previous Chapters: 🛺 'Home crappy Home' from the beginning ▶️ here 🌴 'The Expedition' from the beginning ▶️ here 🎤 'Putting the Boys Back together' from the beginning ▶️ here 🥀 'Disbandment of the Group' from the beginning ▶️ here

[fierceawakening]

So, actual question about actual gaslighting:

Mom tells me that my birthday gift is a table from IKEA that she and dad are buying me. I'm happy about this, as I very much do need a table. The one I have is one they were getting rid of when they moved into an apartment more suited to them aging in place, and is a lovely table but is way the fuck too big for my small apartment so I'm happy about this.

We go to IKEA. Somehow they forget that this is an hour each way and everyone is frustrated and annoyed at the trip taking so long so we're all kind of snippy while we're there. Which is maybe not great but I'm just kinda, eh, shit happens, I'm finding a table. Whatever.

TO MY PERCEPTION, my mom has a thing about people getting snippy. She starts to get really nervous and uncomfortable and make a big deal out of it, where I personally would prefer we just all laugh it off. "Oh fuck, we're all tired and cranky and forgot how fucking HUGE an IKEA is. Ow, argh, welcome to the universe, we all want to commit murder now but are too tired, woe is us, ha ha ha." But, again, as I perceive it, this is Not Okay with my mom, who really wants everyone to act happy and grateful all the time. It's TO ME like she can't see grateful if you're not beaming, and it baffles me.

BUT I am not her, and I could be downplaying that I'm curt to the point of mean, so let's presume that I'm terrible and grouchy and should really be less of both given that this is a present for me. Okay. I suck. Let's go.

Well, things get worse. We go to have dinner after, and I say we should wait until we get back to town and know the restaurants, and that while I know she practices intermittent fasting religiously "it's never actually the end of the world to mess up your diet once due to extenuating circumstances, we can push dinnertime to 6:30."

Well she LOSES IT because I called her fasting a diet and we have an argument which culminates in us eating at a terrible Mexican place we all absolutely hate so it won't be 6:30 at which point she absolutely cannot eat.

We're all tired and grumpy and annoyed because that was exhausting They take the table home with them and tell me they'll come back tomorrow (today) to assemble it, and then, since this is about my birthday, we'll go out to lunch for my bday. (I could SWEAR I asked if it was OK that that would take attention away from Mother's Day and she said it's fine, but maybe I don't remember?)

Anyway, we're all still exhausted and kind of annoyed, and now we're assembling furniture. I'm tired and hungry and looking forward to lunch, and from MY PERSPECTIVE I'm still in a bit of a snippy mood but I don't THINK I'm doing anything terrible.

But she gets super upset. Why am I not happy? Why am I not excited? Why did I not immediately mention Mother's Day? And I'm just like oh man can I just focus on putting a table together? And she's like why am I talking in the way I'm talking? MY answer to which is that we're all tired and run down and it's normal, but she doesn't like this.

Finally she tells me that she's not going to go with me to lunch if "I can't behave decently."

I'm hurt about this, but I don't want to promise that I can "behave decently" because I know from experience that trying to mask in front of her makes things worse, not better.

So I say, "You need to make up your own mind. I am not sure I can mask my snippiness until I have eaten and calmed down. If this is a dealbreaker for you, please just drop us off and we'll catch back up with you. If it's not, I'll probably be fine once I've rested and have some food in me."

I feel like this makes sense, and actually even like maybe it would help! I can't vow to never be visibly tired or annoyed, but I can be aware she dislikes it and tell her I'll catch her later when it won't put her on edge.

But her reaction to that is basically that I want license to behave badly, and that I don't care about her enough to "be decent." She goes with us, but the whole time talks about how unfair it is that I be allowed to "not be decent."

I eat the food and enjoy the restaurant, and as I predicted, this helps me to feel calmer and present as less obviously irritated. I am hurt deeply by the "not decent" remark but able to hide those feelings as I'm calmer. Everything is fine. Ish.

...

AITA or is she? I mean, I think she is, but... if I am abusive or cruel and giving myself a pass, I feel like I should know that.

I just... Idk. I don't feel like anyone else does this. Like, friends and loved ones have seen me annoyed. And they don't necessarily like it, but there isn't the same sense that I'm incapable of being decent.

Dafuq do I do about this? I love my mom but I'm so tired of feeling like I can't just... be pissed off, lest it hurt her in some way, when it seems like me being pissed off in front of other people is treated like it's, maybe not perfect, but normal.

[lnights]

“…I thought you forgot about me.” “I’m sorry. Today has been… a lot and I– I wish I could have called you sooner.” With Joel/johnny please?

Thanks for the ask Ty🖤

The day had gone to absolute hell.

It was a day off, but there hadn't been a single day off on this godforsaken tour that had actually been relaxing.

There were too many arguments; he couldn't sleep in because of the constant yelling, couldn't make a call because he was being constantly pulled in to meditate or break up fights before they could escalate too much.

It was no better on gig days, but it had been getting worse and worse as the tour went on and it was only a matter of time before it would boil over and become physical.

And Archie was in rare form that day, he had picked fights with everyone he had came in contact, leaving Johnny to apologize in his wake to try to save face with the other bands.

“Please,” Johnny had begged after the fifth argument, “if nothing else, think about the reputation we'll get here. They'll say we're difficult, aggressive, we won't get asked on another tour here-”

“I don't want to tour with these posers anyway,” Archie sneered, “I'm just standing up for myself like a man should.”

It was like that all day, Johnny did his best to put out the fires his singer was constantly starting, he started to wonder if it would be worth it to just hire someone to trail Archie every day and keep him out of trouble.

It wasn't until people started talking about dinner that Johnny realized he had fucked up.

He was supposed to call Joel at noon.

His phone had been abandoned in the hotel room they had for the day (he thanked everything holy that he was sharing with Middy) and he had been so busy all day he hadn't had a chance to go back for it.

He ran back to the hotel from the small bar Archie had insisted on stopping at and straight up the stairs to the second floor, not pausing to take a breath until he saw his cell on the bed he had claimed.

Biting his lip he looked at all the missed messages and calls, Joel was clearly upset but had stopped messaging him an hour before. Which wasn't a good sign, Johnny knew how easily he spirals when left on his own.

He sat heavily on the bed and clicked Joel's number, hoping he would answer, Finland was eight hours ahead of this part of the US and it was possible Joel had already gone to bed, even if that would be early for him.

Still, he wasn't that surprised at the lack of sleep in Joel's face when he popped up.

He didn't say anything though, just stared.

“Hi,” Johnny sighed when he didn't speak, “I don't suppose I can beg for forgiveness?”

Joel seemed to fidget, looking down before finally whispering “…I thought you forgot about me.”

“I’m sorry. Today has been… a lot and I– I wish I could have called you sooner.” Johnny raked a hand through his hair, “baby I'm so sorry, I swear I didn't mean to miss our date, it's the only thing that's been keeping me sane.”

Joel gave him a small smile at that, “me too, but keeping me sane is a tall order.”

Johnny laughed and laid back on the bed, “going a little crazy with the album all done?”

“It comes out in a month!” Joel said, getting more animated as they talked, “and we don't have any gigs for another week. I'm going nuts.”

Johnny felt his stress melting away as he listened to him, being so far away from his boyfriend was hard on both of them and he couldn't wait for this godforsaken tour to be over.

“How about you?” Joel asked, “has things gotten any better?”

“No,” Johnny sighed, “I think this is the end for us, Mid and Taz feel the same.”

“I'm so sorry,” Joel told him. They had talked about Archie's behavior at length so it wasn't a surprise, but it was painful to watch all the same.

“It's what it is,” Johnny sighed, “at least it means I'll get some more time with you.” he smiled, “I can't wait to see you again love.”

Joel smiled back, “I can't wait to see you too.”

“Just a few more weeks,” Johnny said softly.

He could survive this tour, he had Joel to go home to.

[fabdante]

*spins* I guess this counts as drabble more than an ask, but anyway, tell me what you think?

Reboot Dante frantically running from survivor's guilt that started in St. Lamia's Orphanage and just grew from there, trying to bury it all behind a facade of hedonism, selfishness, and apathy. (Remembering his family and what happened to them added to this, tho being able to remember a time when he was safe and loved and had a normal family and home life helped more than it hurt. Most days, anyway.)

But even then, sometimes he'd still care about people, even through all his defenses. Sometimes someone would be kind to him, and he couldn't help it. Sometimes he'd get close to someone, form some kind of connection... and then the cycle would repeat- the demons would do what they always do, and ruin everything. In oh so very many, many different ways. In whatever way hurt the most. There was no escape.

[I'm sure you can add ways that things with Vergil and the Order fucked him up, too, but I'm skipping ahead a bit, for now.]

Vergil coming back as the King of Hell and having a whole host of information on all the people Dante was involved with that the demons hurt, and throwing that/those failures (at least that's how Vergil would phrase it) in Dante's face as a reason why Dante needs him (Vergil) to handle ruling the demons and the humans. As proof that Vergil's way is right, no matter how twisted Vergil's methods have gotten thanks to the power of being King of Hell going to Vergil's head. "All that matters is absolute power", and all that.

And it works! At least, that last part does. Just not in the way Vergil had hoped it would. Because that's the thing that finally pushes Dante over the edge into, "Okay, fuck it" territory, and his goal for this fight goes from "Talk my dumbass little brother out of this" to "Kill him. Kill him, or die trying".

("I hope I die. I hope this kills us both." Because he knows that after this, he's not going to have anything left to go back to, really. Or at least, he knows Kat isn't going to want to see or talk to or hear from him ever again. Which is worse than just dying here, honestly. Or getting trapped in Hell or where ever else.)

Because all that matters is power, right? So then, that's how they'll settle this.

I keep picturing this as after Vergil's stabbed Dante in the chest and taken Dante's amulet, after Dante and Kat have tried over and over to get through to Vergil, and it just. Doesn't work. And now its just Vergil and Dante, and the blood. Dante's kneeling there, impaled on his own sword, but that's fine, because it's the Rebellion.

"Feels good, doesn't it, Vergil? Better than the pain. The fear. The loneliness. All that power... Anyone tries to hurt you, and you can just slip back into that and not care. At least, for a little while. But it all catches up with you, eventually. Bet you know that, too, don't you? That's why it- all this- still hurts."

One last little attempt at talking sense into his little brother, before Dante lets the power the Rebellion is waking up inside him fully consume him. It doesn't work, of course, tho it does kinda unnerve Vergil a bit- which he of course tries to ignore and cover with bravado. And then...

there's no more talking. At least, not from Dante. The most Dante can manage right now is a sort of guttural, snarling roar. Or screaming.

The fight goes from "epic swordsmanship + gunplay battle" to two brothers beating the ever-loving SHIT out of one another- yes, with swords, and guns, and gauntlets, and demonic/angelic energy, but also just with their bare hands. And teeth. No finesse. No fancy moves. Just lots of snarling And blood and raw, brutal violence. And it ain't clean or pretty.

I'd HOPE Dante would snap out of this before he actually killed Vergil, tbh, or that Vergil had the sense to run away before Dante killed him... but then again, he might not.

Don't really have a set "end" for this, so I'll just leave it here.

oh this is fun!!

i do think the like issues with the reboot twins are a lot more um...Violent then the preboot twins, I suppose. idk how to word it. it's just a lot more personal and volatile like idk if i can see the preboot twins ever being pushed to the point of ever wanting to kill each other on purpose. the reboot twins on the other hand...totally different story.

[swiftsuburbanlegends]

OKAY OKAY Lucas and Nik get injured and end up with Danny for safety purposes, Vin gets upset because he's her safe space and feels betrayed by him for letting Lucas in but Dallas tells her everything he did to get here for her and how his brother died (mayhaps it's never permanent we decide later) so after some stewing Vin has a normal conversation with him

Look I can see Lucas struggling to like stuff his duffle, because he knows this is hurting Vin, and he'd rather risk infection on the streets than be the reason she is in pain again.

She comes into the room and sees him putting in the last of his stuff.

"What do you think you're doing?" He sighs, knowing he can't make up an excuse. "What does it look like? I'm getting out of your way." "I never said I wanted you to go." "Maybe not to my face, princess, but we both know you would like it better if I found other accommodations." "I told you to stop calling me that." Only she's not sure if she actually had. Lucas was the only one who had ever called her 'princess'. The moniker was technically hers, but she had never felt like it fit. She had never even seen the inside walls of the Queen castle. She had believed herself a commoner a lot longer than she had known the truth. He met her gaze then nodded. "As you wish. But still I should go." "Don't be stupid, you can barely more your arm," she gestured to him as he tried to move his duffle from the bed. "You could make that worse if you leave." "And if I stay, I'm gonna hurt you worse. And I can't be the reason you're in anymore pain," he shook his head and she can see the tears he's fighting back. "So I'll find something else, somewhere else." "You think leaving is going to cause me less pain?" "Vin--" She moved to him, taking the bag and tossing it to the side. "No. If you leave, and something bad happens to you, what do you think that's gonna do to Dallas, to me?" "I thought you wanted me gone?" "I never said that." "You sure as hell have acted like it." He winced, and she didn't know if it was out of pain or the reality of his words. So Vin did the one thing she could think to do get him to stay. She reached across the space, a couple of inches that felt like lightyears, and took his hand. "I wanted you to be able to go back. I wanted you not to be working for Merlyn, to stop yourself from turning in Thea. I wanted you to be able to erase the things that drove us apart." "If I could--" "Let me finish, please," Vin took her other hand so she could turn his face to hers. "I know we can't go back. I know the things you did, they'll always be there. And I wish I could tell you that they won't keep me at arms length, but I can't. What I do know is, even if I didn't want to admit it, when you were shot I was terrified that I would never see you again." "I'm right here," he said, squeezing her fingers. "You weren't though," she shook her head. "For an hour I thought, I thought you weren't going to make it. I thought, this is it? This is one of my only tethers to home, just cut. No valiant roar, no fighting tooth and nail to stay, just you, gone. And it felt like losing my parents all over again, but so much worse." "You and Dallas are my only connections to home," she continued with a sad smile. "And if you die, I don't think I could handle that for real." "Princess..." "So stay," she pressed. "Maybe it's selfish, but stay anyway. Because if you leave, I'm going to imagine the worst. You promised me once that you would never leave my side, and you'd always protect me. And if you leave--"

[detailtilted]

Next Enhanced Video In Process - CHICON 2008

WARNING: Heavy camera flashes below.

I thought I'd post an update in case anyone's curious. After finishing Comic-Con 2008, I moved on to CHICON 2008. The videos for the main panels are decent and they're upscaling nicely, but you'll all hate the quality of the Breakfast video. I'm doing that one first.

I made some improvements to the originals which are explained and shown below, but I couldn't upscale them. Jared came out ok, probably because he was closer to the camera, but even the most light-handed approach distorted Jensen's features too much.

However, one thing I improved were the flashes. The original videos are nuts. Flashes have been bad on other videos too, but I think the lighting in the room made them stand out worse here. I was afraid they'd give someone a seizure or something so I found a way to reduce them. I probably won't do this again on other videos because I used a free trial that expired and I've already put way too much money into software for this pet project. I don't think it'd work as reliably on the less dramatically flashy videos anyway, but I may reconsider the purchase if I encounter more videos like this down the road.

I also tried to do some color corrections, but it's erratic. Suppressing the flashes doesn't change the real life effect they had on the lighting in the room. Maybe that's why the color correction settings I applied didn't have consistent results throughout the video. I separated out some longer segments of drastically different colors and fixed them independently, but there was just too much fluctuation. Individually analyzing and correcting all 37,440 frames is way beyond the scope of this project (and my patience) and would probably require more lifetimes than I have.

Anyway, I wanted to post a short comparison video so people can see the difference. I think when people just see the enhanced video by itself they'll be like, "this sucks!" I was hoping people might not hate it as much if they've seen how it originally looked. I think the "enhanced" version, once I publish it, will be the best version that's been posted to date, even if it's still crappy.

This video has three 30-second samples:

Original version of Breakfast video.

My modified version.

Sample of upscaled main J2 panel to prove it will get better again after the Breakfast video. (No flashes removed. You can see them, but I think they're less painful.)

I've also made other adjustments that aren't seen in that sample:

The best-quality video has interruptions because the video taker also took pictures. This caused the frame to freeze and the sound to cut out. When possible, I edited in an alternate lower-quality video at those moments. I also edited in the alternate video to cover brief segments missing in the main videos.

The only other video that has the 1st two minutes is one where the video taker was scared to be too obvious about what they were doing and so recorded their legs and random non-J2 objects instead. 😂 But it was still helpful, because I substituted that video's audio in for the sections that cut out on the primary video due to the picture taking. We'll still have a few freeze frames in the first two minutes, but at least we can hear what was going on.

Speaking of hearing, there were some truly ear-shattering screams when Jared and Jensen first came out. I lowered the volume a little in those moments to save your ears some trauma.

This breakfast video will be the next one I release, but my video releases will be increasingly slow. I have something going on in real life that's eating up most of my spare time and will probably continue to do so off and on for most of this year. Nothing bad, just very time-consuming. This is a shorter video though, and I'm already well into the work on it, so hopefully it won't take too long.

[flowerprincesscherryblossom]

Fair warning: I am writing this only because I want to get this off my chest. I don't care if you agree with me, disagree with me, or want to yell random words at me (if you want to do any of those, my asks, messages, and replies to this post are open to anyone). Got that? Good.

BTS HAS TO LET THE GRAMMYS GO!!! I'm being serious. LET IT GO! BTS has been in this song and dance with the Grammys since 2019 with BWL and has, at this point, become nothing more than a weird obsession that makes everyone involved incredibly desperate and with insane levels of cope in their bloodstream.

So BTS didn't get nominated for an award show that nobody gives a shit about anyway - big deal, you'll live.

The Grammys don't like boy bands, they never have and that's what BTS is to them - a boy band.

Backstreet Boys and NSYNC were barely recognized by them back in the day. One Direction and Queen (who isn't a boy band in case anyone needed remembering) never got a Grammy.

Why would you think that a non-English boy band, whose songs are all predominantly in non-English and with very little radio play partly because of that, who are better known because of their fanbase/the noise around them, would stand a chance? BTS is popular mostly due to word of mouth, they have the hype but that doesn't equal commercial success - also pop music isn't something that is awarded based on merit or quality, make of that what you will.

I'd love to know who in the goddamn company is this obsessed with the Grammys.

Like seriously, review this a little bit (good chance I didn't get everything): 2022 - Namjoon said that he didn't care/was done with them after Butter lost 2023 - Yet to Come and My Universe get nominations but no wins (BTS also don't attend the show and the reason given was the military enlistment) 2024 - according to Billboard Magazine 2024 Grammy Issue Indigo was submitted to the nominations, no nominations of any kind were present 2025 - Jungkook, Jimin, Namjoon, and Taehyung all submit their works, get zero nominations

For a band who said they don't care anymore, they sure do love to submit their work to the thing they don't care about, don't they 🙄?

Again, I'd love to know who is this obsessed with the glorified toy that you can probably buy on Amazon for cheap.

Namjoon needs to let the fucking Grammys go. Yoongi needs to let the fucking Grammys go. It has reached the point where, instead of coming across as a goal for their hard work, it comes across more as a way to fight whatever insecurity they have and that's why they are so desperate for it (like a child who wants to be told they are a good kid who did a good work if you will).

HYBE needs to let the fucking Grammys go. At this point they'll destroy the group for a shitty Grammy, while at the same time slapping the BTS name onto everything so they can keep selling it to the masses because they sure do love milking their cash cows, don't they?

ARMY needs to let the fucking Grammys go. ARMY has this collective obsession with making BTS win every asinine award thrown their way and it's nothing short of embarrassing and pathetic. Like, it's really good if the boys do amazing and get rewarded for it, no problem from me on that. But seriously, we need to calm down with the amount of obsession we have with meaningless/pointless awards.

And God forbid if BTS doesn't win or doesn't get nominated, then the fandom can get so tiresome and petty.

How many times have we seen someone say some of the following whenever one of the two happens: "they're biased against k-pop/BTS" "who cares, those awards are meaningless anyway" "look at all the other awards BTS won" "BTS doesn't need XYZ but XYZ needs BTS"

It's even worse when another group is the one who wins, like, holy shit, some of the things that ARMY will say. "they won because BTS wasn't there" "it's an attendance award" "BTS is so kind they give them charity awards"

Like, Jesus Christ, do we need to discredit and bring down other groups/fandoms on their hard work and struggles, while trying to boost up our group/fandom with our hard work and struggles? Way to be a hypocrite (then again, several ARMY have no problem being hypocrites when it comes to payola 🤔)

This is what I mean by cope - also, no ARMY, the Grammys don't need you or BTS for viewership numbers. Even if all of us watched the show from beginning to end, we'd only be making a tiny dent in those low numbers.

And before someone comments: Yes, not all of ARMY does this. Yes, ARMY isn't the only fandom that does this. I know that I'm not an idiot.

That's not the point here.

The point is that BTS, HYBE, and ARMY need to calm the fuck down when it comes to awards, they literally mean neither jack nor shit when it comes to the amount of work an artist puts into their craft.

So what if BTS doesn't win/gets nominated for a Grammy? Who cares? Is that all that matters? Maybe they'll win one in the future when the time comes. Stuff like this happens all the time, it's nothing new.

What doesn't help the situation is the level of desperation and cope from the three parties involved which ends up doing more harm than good.

HYBE needs to calm down when it comes to pushing for every goddamn BTS release to be on the Grammys. Stop it, it's not gonna happen no matter how hard you try okay? Stop it.

BTS needs to calm down when it comes to pushing for every release of theirs to be on the Grammys and then being mad when it doesn't work in their favor.

And they to stop doing this stupid thing of: submits work to grammys -> gets nominated -> doesn't win -> gets upset about it -> submits work to grammys next year or submits work to grammys -> doesn't get nominated -> gets upset about it -> submits work to grammys next year

At this point, they act more like children throwing a temper tantrum because they didn't get the stupid toy they wanted, than grown-ass adults taking a loss in stride. They can be pretty petty on this shit too.

ARMY needs to calm down when it comes to giving them every goddamn award win that exists under the sun, it doesn't help the way you think it does, and getting mad when you don't get what you think BTS deserve just makes you look like a bunch of children with bad tempers.

Does anyone remember the phrase: "the road to hell is paved with good intentions"?

That's all I have to say on this matter, now I'll go back to writing.

[jazlynriddle]

Welcome to your life - Pt 2:

Acting On Your Best Behaviour Ch 17:

Summary:

They'd seen it in their fellow orphans often enough to recognise the pattern and were now forced to admit, despite their hopes to the contrary, that Isidora had likely suffered similar side effects.

No… they'd always known she had. The Keeper had just wanted the power that Ranrok had, enough to convince themselves that they would be able to handle it better than that naive woman.

With the start of the Keeper’s sixth-year in Hogwarts, comes a whole slew of headache-inducing challenges from the most unexpected of places. Between insignificant pests throwing wrenches into their plans and tedious teenage drama, that the Keeper is entirely unprepared for, they wonder if they'll make it to their NEWTs without losing their sanity.

Or worse, Ominis or Sebastian.

Warnings: Sebastian x MC x Ominis! Drug Addiction! Spoilers! Slow-burn corruption! Dark content! Fucked up 1800s orphanages! MC has no love for Anne or Solomon! Dubious happy ending (it's happy for MC, Seb and Ominis at least).

You can also read on AO3! (chapter specific warnings below)

Notes:

Warnings: Torture, again not exactly torture but kiiiinda torture, there's a lot of pain involved but it's a side-effect, sort of?

We'll get to the proper torture when it's victims our kids are emotionally invested in xD

And that smut with Ominis will be coming up next chapter! ;) I'm gonna need to add a new tag to the fic haha x3

FYI: For those not too familiar with the name, an 'athame' is a ceremonial blade often used in magical rituals, it's usually a black handled and double-edged dagger.

"Thank you for the breakfast, Tibsy, it was delicious." The Keeper nodded as the small elf cleared the dishes from the table.

Tibsy beamed brightly at the compliment, giving the three a little bow before popping away, likely to feed their guest back at Dìon.

"Will both of you be working on the wards today as well?" Ominis asked, taking a relaxed sip of tea, his expression content after their meal. "The two of you seemed rather tired when you got home yesterday evening."

"I think we can continue tomorrow and relax a little together today, maybe get some homework done too." The Keeper smiled wryly, their guest needed time to recover too.

They'd spent a fair amount of time and effort healing the woman after their tests. Neither they nor Sebastian were particularly skilled healers however, so it had taken a while just to perform basic treatment with Tynx's help, and they’d left the rest to her own natural recovery.

"We had some ideas for the underground area's security, but I’ll need to double check our math first, our tests with the Guardian prototypes failed pretty abysmally too." The Keeper grimaced lightly, absently cleaning a spot of sauce on the table with their napkin.

"We weren't very hopeful for those without the Leyline link anyway, it's fine to rework them later." Sebastian gave them a gentle pat on the hand and the Keeper returned his efforts with a fond smile.

"Fair enough." The Keeper nodded. "According to Tynx, the greenhouses are almost complete as well. We can probably start moving the plants in soon."

"I suppose I shall continue my search for Anne tomorrow then, I got a promising lead in Cragcroft yesterday." Ominis hummed thoughtfully.

"That reminds me, yesterday we took a quick dip in the lake since we were in the area, and while there, Sebastian and I found something for you, Ominis." The Keeper smiled softly as they stood to retrieve their satchel.

"So that's why Sebastian was missing a sock." Ominis chuckled.

"I swear some critter must have made off with the blasted thing." Sebastian grumbled. "How'd you tell anyway?"

"Your steps sounded uneven." Ominis drawled dryly.

"Yeah, right." Sebastian snorted sceptically.

The Keeper retook their seat, satchel in hand as they spoke. "Here we go, hopefully you'll like what we found. Though, I will say, Ominis, that you don't have to accept this if you don't want to."

"Oh?" Ominis tilted his head to the side curiously, feeling slightly wary as well, from their words. A moment later, he jumped in surprise when the sound of the jar opening was followed by two soft and shrill voices.

"It's open, it's open! Left, let's go this way-"

"No, right, let's go right-"

"Ow! No, I want to go left!"

"Ouch! Stop it, I want to go right!"

"Left!"

Ominis blinked in confusion for a moment, before abruptly realising that the words had a familiar lisp to them. "...snakes?"

The Keeper chuckled. "Yes, I was considering giving them to you closer to your next birthday, but we've run into a small problem."

"I think you mean two small problems." Sebastian snorted. "The fact that it's not two snakes, it's one."

Ominis frowned in even more confusion, feeling more wary and uncomfortable, had they forgotten that he didn't like being a Parselmouth? Why would his lovers offer him such a thing? For a birthday gift no less.

"Sebastian's right, this little one has two heads." The Keeper shook their head in amusement as the two headed snake wiggled about drunkenly. "I'm not entirely certain why, but they can't seem to move right. I spotted them trying and failing to swim away from a dragonfly nymph in the lake."

"And what's the problem you've run into?" Ominis asked brusquely, impatient to understand why he was being gifted a two-headed snake.

"Feeding." The Keeper replied, plucking another jar from their bag, and withdrawing two worms with a mild grimace, lowering the wiggling creatures into the snakes’ jar.

Immediately, the two heads began to whip back and forth aggressively, hissing at each other angrily.

"Food food! Mine!"

"No, mine! Out of the way, I'm hungry!"

"I saw it first! You move!"

"Ow! Stop pulling! Hey!"

"They're fighting…" Ominis' eyes widened in understanding.

"Yes, even though there's more than enough worms to go around, we can’t feed them if they keep thrashing about." The Keeper rolled their eyes in exasperation. "Likely because only one of the heads can look 'in front' at a time. Perhaps you can do something about that?"

Ominis hesitated for a moment, listening to the little hisses of distress, and feeling his sympathy for them mount with every cry. He too knew what it was like to feel so at odds with oneself, the pain of being torn in two directions. If he could help ease someone's struggle and conflict, shouldn't he?

Finally, he sighed and focused on the small voices, tapping into his birthright with a fluidity that he resented. "Stop fighting little ones, there is enough food for both of you."

The hisses of the snakes immediately stopped, the two heads staring at him in shock for several seconds.

"It speaks, how?"

"How?"

"Yes… I am a speaker of your tongue, you needn't fear, you can share, there is plenty of food here." Ominis couldn't suppress a smile at the curious little voices.

"Lots of food?"

"Really?"

"Yes, so just open your mouths and wait for the food to come to you." Ominis nodded firmly.

"...okay… food? Now?"

"Yes, food food, I'm hungry!"

Ominis chuckled, finding their young, innocent voices and immediate trust rather adorable, quite unlike the sinister snakes his family kept around the manor. Deadly sentries that kept his parents abreast of everything their children did. "You can feed them now."

"Finally." The Keeper sighed and lowered the wiggling worms into the small snakes' open mouths, the twin snake's patterned tail flicked excitedly as they chomped down on the fat and juicy worms.

The twins quickly swallowed the worms and opened their mouths again, hissing insistently. The Keeper shook their head at the demanding creatures, they didn't need to be a Parselmouth to understand that gesture.

As they fed the snakes another two worms, the Keeper added. "I rescued this one because I've never seen a two headed snake before. It's up to you if you want to keep them but I doubt they'll survive on their own."

Ominis nodded in agreement, it sounded like the snakes couldn't even move properly, they would be incredibly vulnerable to predators and unable to hunt when they were fighting over both food and direction. He'd never been proud of his ability to speak parseltongue, but if he could use it to help…

"Ah, full… sleepy."

"I wanna sleep somewhere warm…"

"Yes, warm warm, it's cold."

"Come here then." Ominis sighed, opening his palms. "They'd like somewhere warm to sleep."

The Keeper gave an approving nod, pouring the snakes out of the jar and into his hands. The two heads immediately began to hiss happily and flick their tongues against his skin.

"Warm! Speaker warm!"

"Speaker smells nice… sleepy…"

Ominis blinked in surprise at how small they were, small enough to fit into one hand. The feeling of their cool scales against his skin was surprisingly soft and he cradled them to his chest, running a finger along their body.

"Hehe tickles!"

"Mmm feels nice, again Speaker again!"

Ominis chuckled, stroking a finger under the chin of the snake that liked it and feeling the twins coil up in his palm to sleep after a few moments. Perhaps it wasn’t so bad being a Parselmouth…

The Keeper's eyes softened at the affectionate expression on Ominis' face. "It's not so bad, isn't it?"

Ominis startled slightly when the Keeper spoke his thoughts, a knowing smile on their face as they continued with. "If you were not the one with this ability, they would have died."

Ominis narrowed his eyes suspiciously. "You seem very intent on convincing me of that. It is not I, that these little ones owe their lives to, it was you who rescued them."

"Be that as it may, from how you've described your family, I doubt any of them would have helped a crippled snake who can't even move right." The Keeper shook their head. "Neither would these snakes have let us non-Parselmouths properly help them without a fight and that could have ended poorly."

"They aren't kidding, you should have seen how aggressive those snakes were, crazy considering that they're practically babies." Sebastian shook his head before glaring at the Keeper accusingly. "Can't believe you didn't tell me there was a tiny pair of snakes biting the palm of your hand the whole time."

"Barely felt it with you snogging me that hard." The Keeper waved their hand dismissively, causing Sebastian’s cheeks to flush with a mixture of surprise and pride, as they returned their attention to Ominis. "Point is, with you, they will be both heard and loved."

Ominis remained silent for several minutes, before he finally sighed and nodded reluctantly, giving the sleeping twin snakes a gentle smile. "I suppose you're right… they will be loved."

The Keeper smiled, pleased that he had come around to their perspective. Parseltongue was a rare and unique ability, it was pointless for Ominis to begrudge himself something valuable that he couldn’t change anyway. Eventually he'd come to accept and maybe even appreciate his gift, if they had anything to say about it.

"What type of snake are they?" Ominis asked curiously after a few moments of petting the snakes.

"Common Watersnake, non-venomous and harmless to humans. Apparently, they're killed often because they resemble the venomous cottonmouth." Sebastian grimaced. "Can't believe some idiots can mistake these cute little things for deadly snakes and kill them for it, feels rather unfair to them."

Ominis went silent again, before murmuring a quiet. "People often hurt those mistaken as dangerous just because of who they were born to or how they look."

"That's why those people are idiots and neither of us will stand for it." Sebastian repeated emphatically and a small shy smile teased the corners of Ominis lips, his cheeks flushing slightly.

"Let's spend some time today setting up a proper living space for the snakes too." The Keeper chuckled. "They're small but we shouldn't keep them in a jar."

Ominis flashed a wry smile. "That's true, fortunately, I am familiar with what a snake nest should have."

"Great, because all I've got are books and they're not particularly helpful when it comes to details." Sebastian grinned.

"Helps that we can simply ask the twins what they like or don't." The Keeper nodded, before glancing at the small coil of snake sleeping in Ominis' hand.

"Since you seem quite unable to move." With a wry smile, the Keeper stood from their chair, kneeled by Ominis' feet, and took his free hand in theirs, grazing the back of it with their lips. "Tell us what we should gather, we are at your service."

Ominis shivered at the sensation, his ears turning red this time while Sebastian snickered behind his hand and Ominis cleared his throat pointedly.

"Well, we'll need some branches and wood shavings for bedding, cypress or aspen would be suitable." Ominis hummed. "We'll also need to pick a good spot that's well-ventilated and will let them sunbathe whenever they like."

"They live by the water, so they probably like it humid." Sebastian added. "We can make the bedding a little wet so they can stay hydrated by burrowing in it."

Ominis nodded, looking more enthusiastic about providing the snakes a comfortable home.

The Keeper smiled affectionately as they sat on the floor, taking out a journal to jot down the supplies they'd need, while the two boys discussed their options. They really did like this side of Ominis, he was such a sweetheart despite everything he'd experienced, as well as his own cunning nature.

"Alright then, while we're gathering these materials, you have a more important job." The Keeper nodded, putting away their journal and smiling as Ominis tilted his head in confusion. "You get to pick names for them."

The Keeper hummed as they scratched several notes in their journal, this second round of tests had gone well. They'd successfully stretched the amount of time it took, for the woman to make it from her cell to ground floor, to a solid hour.

It had been rather entertaining watching her slide down the stairs repeatedly, after said stairs transformed into slippery slopes when the cell wards detected the breach. Though, as fun as that had been, it had been more surprising when she'd used a rather creative combination of Bombarda and a door to successfully propel herself up the slides.

Speaking of doors…

A muffled scream came from the woman bound to the cell's cot as Sebastian carefully slid a small and sharp athame under the skin of her right palm, like one might skin an apple. Her eyes were filled with tears and her body struggled to contort with every shift of his blade.

The ropes binding her jerking limbs to the cot's sturdy metal frame, wrung against her wrists, and burned the skin under them with every spasm. Her cries gurgled and choked around the saliva gathering under the cloth they'd gagged her with, preventing her from biting her own tongue. Rolling his eyes at the sound, Sebastian continued to shear until finally the entire strip of her palm peeled right off.

"And, there we go." Sebastian grinned, looking proud of his work as he raised the bloody layer of skin, or more so the doorknob attached to it, with a pair of prongs, discarding it into the blood-filled bowl under her hand without much care for the splash that followed.

The woman continued to cry and whimper despite the announcement that her suffering had reached its end, perhaps she couldn't understand words at this point.

"Quit complaining, nothing a bit of wiggenweld won't cure." The Keeper huffed as they finished jotting down their notes. "Be glad we're even helping you remove the damn thing."

"Could've left you with a knob permanently attached because you tried a door that you had no reason to open." Sebastian agreed, flipping the bloody blade in the air, seemingly unbothered by the flecks of red that splattered across the floor as he caught it again with ease.

The Keeper rolled their eyes at his showing off but couldn't conceal the fondness in their smile. In truth, they were deeply impressed by Sebastian's steady hand and keen wit.

His idea of furnishing the underground floors with sliding doors adorned with charmed fake doorknobs was quite brilliant. Forcing the escapee to either sever their hand or at least injure themselves, costing them the use of a hand even if they choose to simply detach the doorknob from the door and leave the knob stuck to their hand. Thus, costing the escapee precious time.

And they'd thought they couldn't possibly become more enamoured with this boy.

This idea alone had severely impacted the woman's dungeon clear time, as she had been further stymied when trying to escape the castle grounds, now that the gates were locked behind passwords. Of course, they had always intended to make the gates securely locked but getting a proper gauge of the time difference a password system made, versus one that could be unlocked with Alohomora, was important to their statistical evaluation of its effectiveness.

Assumptions, in their experience, were the most foolish yet easy mistake to make in any given scenario, the last thing they needed would be to overestimate or underestimate the effects of any individual decision at a critical moment.

The woman had then tried to scale the walls with one hand and that had cost her another two hours, several conjured ropes, and a debilitating amount of physical energy. The woman didn't even make it to the red zone before she passed out from exhaustion, and her injuries, this time.

"Well, at least that answers the question of how far the permanent sticking charm goes." The Keeper nonchalantly cast a scourgify at their partner's bloody hands with a dry chuckle. "Skin deep."

Sebastian snorted, drawing his wand with his now clean hands, and casting a scourgify on the athame in turn, before tucking it back into its holster around his waist. "Well, with that settled, I'll go see if Tynx has finished making a new door and reapply the charm if he's done."

"Sure, I'll finish up here." The Keeper nodded, tucking away their journal as Sebastian picked up the bowl and made his way towards the cell door, taking a moment to give them a kiss on the cheek on his way out.

As the cell door closed behind him, the Keeper cast a scourgify on the woman's hand, ignoring her renewed screams as the spell scraped the raw and exposed flesh clean. They waited a few moments, before ungagging her, grabbing her by the hair and lifting her head so they could pour a vial of wiggenweld into her mouth.

As soon as she swallowed the potion, they released her and cast a scourgify on their own hand to clean the oils off. The woman coughed a few times, wincing as the skin on her palm began to burn and itch as it healed.

As the Keeper began releasing the woman's hands and feet from the ropes binding them to the cot's frame, her raspy voice wheezed through her throat. "...why…"

The Keeper straightened as they finished unbinding her. "Why what."

"...why me?" The woman sobbed, curling up into a ball the moment she was released. "I never did anything bad, my dad never did anything bad. We never did anything wrong, why us? Why me? It's not fair."

The woman shrieked, her bloodshot eyes stabbing her captor accusatorily. "What did I do to deserve this?"

The Keeper stared at her blandly, their expression flat and disinterested. "You demanded a hundred galleons for mere information that wasn't worth such a valuation."

The woman stared at them uncomprehendingly and the Keeper turned to leave the cell. "I can't say anything about what you suffered before, but if you think you're the only one dealt a bad hand by fate, you're sorely mistaken."

The Keeper chuckled sardonically as they stopped by the door. "The only thing we get to choose is what type of person we become. Don't expect reality to be fair. Whatever you do will have its own consequences regardless of how extenuating your circumstances may be. You will be judged by the actions you take."

"The moment you took advantage of a stranger who did you no wrong, you lost any moral high ground to bemoan your unjust fate." The Keeper pushed the door open and closed it behind them.

"Then why are you doing this!?" The woman protested, pushing herself up weakly. "Doesn't that apply to you as well?"

"Of course it does. I simply care not for moral grounds, nor do I expect any sort of fairness for myself. That is the person I chose to be, and I am well aware that if I fail, I will taste a hell far worse than the one I grew up in." The Keeper flashed her a sharp grin as they locked the cell door. "All I have to ensure… is that I play every card in my deck and never lose."

As long as you know yourself, no one can tell you who you are. Strength is being able to smile even when it's hard to.

Smile… her father's last words resonated through her mind, she wondered how long it'd been since she'd smiled. She gazed at her own reflection in the cold metal of her cot's frame, the worn and tired face staring back at her bore nothing but worry lines.

She could barely remember his voice, but she could still remember her father's face clearly. Like hers, it had been worn and tired from the hard life of caring for his daughter alone in the middle of the woods while on the run from the Ministry. Even then, she could also remember his smile, the way the skin around his eyes crinkled in little crow feet.

He'd been a hard worker, tilling their garden without a single complaint, tending their crops with a gentle hand. Every day of his suffering that she bore witness to, made anger burn inside her ever hotter and she’d held on to that anger for her entire life. How could anyone believe that such a kind and strong man would murder his own wife with dark magic?

When he passed away, that anger compelled her to remain in their small hut. He'd once told her that he hoped she would return to the town after he passed, to see what had become of it and if his friends were still well, but she couldn't understand why he would say such a thing.

What did she care for the people who betrayed and abandoned them? Why would she return to the town, beg for their help or acceptance? No, she would stay in the place her father had built. It was theirs and it was all that mattered.

When people had occasionally come by her home seeking help, her anger compelled her to spit in their face and turn them away. What did she owe them? No one had helped her when her father was sick, no one had helped him when he begged his friends to care for his daughter when he was being accused.

Not that she really wanted them to, if someone had been willing to take her in, he would have allowed the Aurors to arrest him, and she didn't believe that he would have been found innocent. Nobody cared about them, so why should she care about anyone else?

Her angry, bitter, and hateful face stared back at her in silver. When had she become like this? When had her face become so heinous? A pang of grief gripped her heart and her eyes welled with tears again. What would her father say if he were to see her now?

As long as you know yourself…

Did she? Did she know who she had become? As she ripped her eyes away from her reflection and wrapped her arms around herself, the answer burned in her heart.

She'd become just like the people who'd turned their backs on her father.

Notes:

https://www.susquehannockwildlife.org/2021/11/19/two-headed-water-snake-finds-a-home-at-the-wildlife-center/

Aren't they cuuuuuuute? I took one look at this two-headed Watersnake and immediately fell in love, so I just had to add them to this story! ♡w♡

And, if you guys don't know how dragonfly nymphs eat, you should look it up, it's honestly quite an unsettling sight, one you might expect to see in an Alien movie rather than real life xP (Still kinda cute too tho)

Also, I wonder if anyone realised that the lake on the map is actually the Hogwarts Legacy logo x3