#I think it's poetic and ironic and awesome

[farfromthebarrel]

Something something Nina being dressed as The Lost Bride and Kaz and Muzzen as Madman as their disguise for getting into Hellgate. Like, i know these are just silly made-up names and all, but Nina is literally a girl who's lost her man and is away from home with nowhere to go (a lost bride, one might say), Muzzen is someone who's accepted to take a slaver's place in the most horrible prison ever so he could bust out (a madman), and as for Kaz, well, it's self-explanatory.

[not-actually-a-goddess]

Fable SMP Finale - Analysis & Thoughts

Holy shit, I cannot even begin to describe how much of an emotional rollercoaster watching the finale of Fable SMP was. I was sobbing one second, screaming in joy the next, laughing and smiling not soon after, and feeling anger or sickness. The pure emotion that the cast of Fable SMP put into this masterpiece is undeniable. And yes, I know it's silly little block people playing silly little stories, but their our silly little block people and their stories are huge! There were cutscenes with commissioned art!

The joy and comfort that Fable SMP has brought me over the past many months is massive. Their streams were around for me to watch when I was having bad days or needed something in the background while studying. Fable SMP was a multimodal storytelling wonder. And whilst I'm sad it's over, I'm happy it was there to start with. I came into this fandom at the mid-point of S2, and from then on, have been hooked. I love the art and the cosplay and the nice fandom with friendly, cosy chat communities. But anyways, let's get into this analysis. (also RIP Rakai, thankyou for romantically distracting Ick and making them forget about hunting the child, a.k.a Athena) Spoilers!!!!!!!!!! For anyone who hasn't watched the finale!

To start with, watching the complicated emotion portrayed by Sherbertquake through Icarus was incredible acting. The whole cast, including Fable himself (aka Mr. HeyHay's husband), displayed awesome acting that I'm jealous of and one day hope to be able to express. I loved watching Sherb change their expression, even minutely, as everyone just unloaded their trauma and screamed at Fable. I loved watching as they realised that maybe their dad wasn't the best guy, even though they knew it in the back of their mind the whole time. Hearing the raw emotion that each member of the cast poured into their act was impressive, and reminded me that you don't just have to be an actor to be good at acting. As of now, I'm still yet to watch HeyHays POV, but trust me I will, I just need to emotionally heal over the next couple of days.

Now onto the storyline of the finale. Now of course, I've only watched from Sherberts' POV, but here's what I think as of now. I started watching the episode effectively knowing what would go down, but I still came out surprised. At the start, I could definitely see the hesitance for action in Icarus but also their want for relief and the freeing of burden, still mostly trusting in their father. Of course, Icarus would always trust Fable at the start, he is their dad. Their dad who they've been missing all their life, whenever they actually needed him, he couldn't be there. Fable was also the one that promised Icarus what they wanted; peace, freedom from Quixis, their mother back, a happy united family, no more resets. Why wouldn't Icarus believe everything their father said? It's like a preacher in a pulpit. But as we moved further through the episode, we started to see everything fall apart. We could see pain, pain as people had to fight others they didn't want to. And then things started to unravel more as everyone entered Purgatory for the final show down. Our beloved Violet of course swooped in to save the day in the final second, saving Athena from Reaver by Fable's hand. Fable was then chained, which is ironic, as this whole scene reminded us of Fable's new mortality. That without the Reaver, he was nothing. And then, we finally got to see Icarus redeem themselves. I thought the glitching trident through the chest was very poetic and very Icarus. The creation destroying their creator in more ways than one. Fable was both Icarus's dad but also the creator of who Icarus had become over the last couple of months. He poisoned Icarus and turned them against their friends, so it was nice to see Icarus make things right and put Fable out of his misery. And then everyone was together again. The brothers were reunited, and I cried when we finally got to see Icarus and Rae get that much needed hug. Athena didn't immediately forgive Icarus, but that's fair, and Icarus understood that and was willing to move towards restoring their relationship. I suppose that's what happens when you push Athenas boyfriend off a tree and hurt Momboo. I think Arisanna staying back in Purgatory and working to restore it was a good move, and I'm excited to watch everyone else's epilogues. When it was time to Icarus to pass on, I was also really sad, because this meant the actual end for the series, especially for Icarus. It was nice to see Violet/Centross and Ick get closure and emotionally heal? And for Ick and Rae get a final goodbye.

Okay, so the art cutscenes? Awesome! They added finesse to the final scenes and made the project really elaborate and put together. I love @fruitsalad864 art, and I could definitely see bits of Silco in Fable. *chefs kiss* I think putting the art in grey background and black ink with touches of colour for emphasis and embellishment was a good creative choice and didn't make anything too busy. I loved the flashes of peoples eyes as they casted the spell to trap Fable, it was a nice way to include everyone into the art. But what do I know? I had to quit high school art classes in Grade 10, which is sad.

Anyways, Sherberts filmed end scene. Let's look at that. Well, we finally got to see Quixis' face, in fact we got to see all of Quixis and the world port. Does anybody know if the creators made the world port prop or they went some where to film. Because if so, kudos for being brave enough to film in a large public setting. The emotion and ambience in the moment was great, and finding out why all the wack has been happening to Icky was a big relief to know. Thankyou Quixis for protecting the wet bird from carrying the burden when they were too young and giving them time to grow up. You're our favourite god/not god kinda' person! Finding out that when Icarus were to take the position, everyone would forget about them past the point of when they died in the first reset, saddened me. But also, seeing Icarus accept this and take up the mantle with no hesitation was a good character development, showing that they're now a selfless person who will do anything for their family. But it's sad that Ick won't see them for a while and they won't remember what happened. But I was also happy, happy to see Icarus move on and happy to see the relief on all their alternate selves faces as Icarus took the spot as Quixis. The filming as we spun through the reel of Icarus's AU's was beautiful and had a good use of angles. The cosplays were awesome, and I've just got to say, the use of that piece of music was perfect, it gave a sense of hope, peace, and new beginnings. It was fresh and I almost felt the wind on my face. Thankyou @sherbertquake56 and your film crew for doing these scenes for us, they added the closure we all needed.

For now, I think I'm calling this a finish for my analysis. But I'll be back! Don't worry! I'll be doing some short analysis's of everyone else's epilogues and also ticking off the predictions I made earlier this year.

Signing out,

The Lady

[bcbdrums]

what do you think of the English fan covers of papermoon and which version do you like the most if you do??

Yeah, I've listened to several.

I won't go into which ones I don't like and why, which...is most of them. Because I don't want to insult people's awesome efforts. But I'll say that generally the reasons I will end up disliking a cover are a collection of a few reasons: bad mixing; melody and/or rhythm departs too much from the original (I'll go into this more), translation that departs too much from the original.

That said, so far my favorite English cover is Caleb Hyles. And it's funny cuz I don't usually go for his stuff. But, it's a great mix, it sticks to the song overall, the translation does its best to use the actual translation where it can... Words such as "degraded" that you just wouldn't really see, for example. He kept in as much as made sense, I felt, and didn't poeticize it too much; he really tried to stay true.

And of course, his surprise switch to Japanese at the end was great.

Do YOU have a favorite cover??

And what I said about melody/rhythm departing too much... We have to remember, it's often the case that the songwriter wrote those specific notes/melody for a reason and so changing them can in fact change the entire feel of the song.

I'll give an example.... "Comet" from Steven Universe. Every single note and rhythm she wrote very precisely.

Some say I have no direction That I'm a light speed distraction But that's a knee-jerk reaction

On that last word, reaction, the melody drops an interval of a fourth and the drop there in combination with the lyrics is meant to show Greg's dejection. Also the initial word of the second and third lines there, the melody starts an octave below before rising. This adds to the anchoring feel of those lyrics, of negative things that have been spoken over him.

Still, this is the final frontier Everything is so clear To my destiny I steer

The initial melodic notes of the second and third line here stay in the same octave, making the melody sound more confident (ironically the same note though... makes you wonder if there's a subliminal doubting in Greg of his choices) but with that confidence added from the constancy of the initial melodic notes, each conclusion sounds more certain, more hopeful, even though the chordal structure is the same.

So, melody matters. Don't change it. (Like every single cover of Comet out there... I like none.)

I could go into the importance of the super-triplet rhythm of Comet but...this was supposed to be about Papermoon. 😅😅😅

Sorry sorry sorry, Comet is just like...one of the best songs ever written in terms of how the music represents a character... It's a modern Wagnerian approach and boy does it succeed.

[brucenorris007]

Okay, I think I covered everything else that’s on my mind about this movie. Which just leaves....

Well. Puss, the themes and Death are so closely tied together that I can’t really talk about any one of them without also getting into the others, so... 

*Breathe in*

SO.

Death. 

“I don’t mean metaphorically, poetically, spiritually or theoretically. Straight-up.”

It–and he–are a constant presence throughout the movie, and the film isn’t shy about it. Horner’s men are swatted down like flies without even the dignity of having individual names assigned to them. The first five minutes are dedicated to showing us who Puss in Boots, the legend, is and his characteristically cavalier swashbuckling attitude toward everything

even in those five minutes, it’s been brought to my attention that Death, the character, is lurking in the crowd, watching and waiting for Puss’ eighth life to end, which it does at the end of the film’s first action sequence. (gorgeous sequence, natch)

knowing Dreamworks, I’m sure they found even more ways than that to weave death into the visuals, but the really genius thing is something I realized just in the midst of typing up a previous post

Papa Bear keeps suggesting that their family head home to hibernate, which fits in with his obvious desire to nap, yes, but it also implies the movie is set in autumn

as in the season before winter, when things freeze and die

Puss in Boots is on his last life, literally the last of stretch of the AUTUMN of his mortal time on earth 

AASDFSDFGDSDF dreamworks you beautiful brilliant MMMM

the otherworldly whistling that precedes Death’s soundtrack and appearance on screen is eerie and haunting and piercing, suits the character of death so well because even as it sticks with you it’s still startling and chilling each time you hear it

And of course I’m sure many youtuber’s have already said it, Death is a great villain because he’s not particularly a villain, but the personified phenomenon we all must face at some point made real (again, “Straight up”) who’s doing his job. the primary trait that makes him a character instead of some mystery man metaphor is that he loathes Puss for his complacency towards life

ironically, Death actually treasures life more than anyone; if he didn’t, he wouldn’t have spent the film hunting Puss to prematurely end his last life, nor would he have let Puss go at the end

and that brings us to the transformation Puss goes through from Legend to Man. er, Cat.

everything that he learns throughout the film, all the growth he undergoes ties back to who he is when he first meets Death and when he meets Death at the end of the movie and it’s all about letting go. letting go of the delusion that he’ll be fine no matter what danger he throws himself into, of the legend he’s created for himself about himself

The task is the same both times; Puss has to confront Death. Nothing about that fact actually changes, he still has to do it alone at the end of the film, he still can’t definitively defeat Death

but Puss himself changes; he lets go of his image of being a fearless hero, accepts that he’s afraid of Death, he lets go of the hope that he can outrun death through using the fallen star’s wish, he lets go of prioritizing all the moments of winning glory over his past lives and learns to cherish those more mundane and innocuous moments he’s had in this life.

Puss sheds the Legend he once was to be the Cat behind the legend. and the awesome part is that he doesn’t lose out on anything in doing so; the cat he is at the end of the film isn’t weaker than the cat he was at the start, nor is his life less fulfilling. Life isn’t more colorful than it was before, and he doesn’t give up swashbuckling either; he just learns to cherish and fight for the life he’s got

In the end, neither he nor any of the cast really need the wish, and that’s the great moral of the film; the things you need in life, the things you really want, you don’t need magic for. So long as you have your priorities straight, they can be found

i think that’s all from me, then. good night

[psychewritesbs]

Chapter 209: Offering to the Unknown--Chapter’s title + Haikyu!! + This is a chick, right? + Sukuna is a distraction + Takaba + Megumi’s confidence

Holy shit guys! Happy JJK-Sunday! Except the chapter dropped on King’s Day (my last name “is” De los Reyes), January 6th, so I’m late but wtv. Hope you ate some Rosca de Reyes por que la rellenan con cajeta chingada madre, yo quiero mi rosca original y sin cajeta!!! and that you had a great holiday season with the fam if you celebrate. 

A few random thoughts beneath the cut...

The chapter’s title

The implications are so juicy. What is this unknown?

The Culling Game is a ritual itself, so there’s this sense that everything is leading up to awakening or invoking some powerful force. 

I’ve been wondering if and when “God” is going to come into the picture.

Haikyu!!’s Kōrai Hoshiumi

Makes you wonder if Gege likes Haikyu!! 

This is a chick, right?

She’s hot. 

I get the feeling we’re going to see more of her.

Sukuna is a distraction

Not Ura Ume looking totally creepy about feeling pleased to have found a bath that will satisfy daddy Lord Sukuna.

But like... this whole Ura Ume + Kenny alliance, not only is it obvs that Kenny is keeping Ura Ume in the dark about his plans... 

Let’s not forget what Sukuna is to Kenny: a distraction to set off at just the right time.

Unless setting it off was back during Shibuya? Or even just the fact that he awakened is the distraction? Idk... to whomever reads this... thoughts?

Takaba

Quick flashback for context...

Dude... like... I'd love to see a poetic-justice type of ending for JJK from Gege because he’s so damn good at “poetic justice”. But... if by the end of JJK Takaba is the one who ends up saving the day because of his Cursed Technique, I will seriously simp Gege more than I do now.

Takaba is just... ridiculous in the best way possible.

And the whole irony of his character is fantastic because his jokes are SO BAD within the JJK world, but I get the sense that his bad jokes are meant to be funny to the audience BECAUSE they are so damn bad. So there’s this interesting breaking of the 4th wall with Takaba.

What’s more, if Takaba can own that he makes bad jokes and that’s what’s funny about him... he could become one of the most powerful sorcerers if only because he has a solid sense of self identity.

in a story like JJK where the strongest sorcerers have a solid sense of identity... Takaba owning that he is 70% unfunny and only 30% funny could be the most powerful weapon ever in the most ironical way possible.

I fucking love him.

Even Megumi is like...

Which brings me to...

Megumi’s confidence

This panel screams “I am confident that I can kick their asses”.

But Megumi’s confidence and sense of self has always been hit or miss. And as of the arc following Shibuya, it feels like he’s grown into his skills to the point where he can feel overly confident that he can accomplish what he sets out to do.

But this makes me wonder what Gege is going to throw at Megumi because he appears to have reached a plateau where things come easy to him because of his current mastery of his Cursed Technique... this could be a problem because the sense of self is dynamic, not static.

I think that for a lot of the Megumi stans like myself who identify with him, one of the reasons we identify with him is his journey of growth.

There’s this awesome post I reblogged (but like good luck finding it even if I tagged it) where op writes about Megumi and “gifted child syndrome” that I felt hit spot on on why those of us who love Megumi because of his arc relate to him so much. 

When you’re a “gifted child” everything comes easy. School, work, everything. The problem is that when everything comes easy, you never learn the value of struggle. So when you’re presented with a struggle it’s easy to give up or feel overwhelmed. 

With Megumi, something about the way he’s written feels very personal. I could be wrong but I wonder if he represents Gege’s own reluctance to own his power. So in a sense, Gege “powers up” when Megumi “powers up” because in JJK powering up is about becoming secure in one’s sense of self.

Seriously, Megumi feels like an exercise in Active Imagination, a Psychological tool used in Jungian analysis to encourage thinking beyond one’s sense of self.

I swear Megumi has felt like a Masterclass in Jungian Psychology from the moment I started watching JJK, and the more I see him grow and develop and HOW he grows and develops, the more I am convinced that this is the case.

This brings me to the idea of #Dark Megumi because fandom is super split on this idea. Some love it (like me), and some absolutely hate the idea.

To each their own.

To me. The idea of Megumi loosing his sense of self to his darker instincts and selfishness is a catalyst for his growth and character development. We still don’t know if this is where Gege is taking his character arc, but when I see his behavior, it sure feels like it. Especially when the definition of power in JJK is “overwhelming sense of self” and Megumi has been working on defining his sense of self this whole time.

It’s not like I think he’s going to become a maniacal villain like Mexico’s most iconic villainess.

Except Megumi would scoff at you in Nihongo.

I don’t have words for it just yet and I’ve been trying to write about it for about a month or two. All I can say right now is that there’s something interesting that happens to sorcerers as they reach the pinnacle of their sense of self: They either become like Sukuna or they become like Gojo.

It’s not even about how crazy they are. 

It’s about how they see the world and the actions they take as a result. 

As ma 🍒 likes to remind me, “let’s wait and see what happens to make a judgement...” 

Happy JJK-Sunday if you’ve made it this far ♥️!

[queenlucythevaliant]

Your posts on faith & science reminded me of this other post on angels being anything that carries out a message or mission for God, and that these can include forces of nature. I have it reblogged on my own blog here: https://mademoiseli.tumblr.com/post/667665278990155776/copperbadge-headspace-hotel-lazarusemmaan. I wonder have you come across it, and what's your take on something like that?

Huh. Okay. For others' reference (and so that I can look at while I write), here's a screenshot of the post in question:

So I tend to think that contemporary popular culture takes way too many liberties with Biblical angels, ironically often in the name of adhering closely to what's "Biblically accurate." This is... not that, but it kind of feels like it's coming from the same place? "Wow, angels are neat; wouldn't it be cool if they...?"

Don't get me wrong, I definitely understand the poetic appeal of this idea. The concept of the Angel of Glycosidic Linkages or somesuch is thought-provoking and compelling. My biggest problem is that this just. Isn't in the Bible? And note that Midrash=\= Biblical canon in Christianity, since Rabbi Abramowitz mentions it.

I mean, for one thing I think that "anything that carries out a mission from God" is way too broad a description for what angels are/do. A quick search on Gospel Coalition defines angels as "spiritual beings who were created by God before the world was created for the purposes of worshipping him and accomplishing his will." I'd elaborate that they're created to declare and reflect God's glory, albeit in a different manner than humans are.

That's just fundamentally different than what natural forces were created to do: to act on the world in predictable ways as part of a system. Natural forces are awesome I think in large part because they are regular, measurable, and mundane. They're not miraculous in the extraordinary sense; they just are. God made rules for the universe and He follows His own rules. That's super cool! He sustains the universe in every moment, but equally he set in motion processes that can sustain themselves when you view the world as a closed system. Again, pretty awesome!

I'm not discounting the possibility that angels are involved natural phenomena in some capacity or another; the Bible doesn't tell us as much about angels as I think most of us would like to know. But given what God has revealed about angels, I don't see this idea anywhere in the text of Scripture. Thus, I think conflating angels with natural forces is more likely to cause theological error than it is to provide any real insight.

Plus like. As compelling an image as the Glycosidic Linkages Angel is, aren't glycosidic linkages cool enough on their own? Don't they already declare the glory of God without there needing to be an angel involved?

[weaselbeaselpants]

Trying to make this short, but simply put, the reason I and other marxists aren't comfortable with the "North Korea is awesome"-vibe some blogs are dissing out isn't because the sentiment is wrong.

Look into half the stories about defectors of NK and mainland China and there's lots of "I'd rather go back home than live in this capitalist nightmare"- and that's BEYOND valid. It is sick, and yes hypocritical, that westerners point and jeer and white savior the shit out North Koreans and Chinese like they're sheeple then just hop right back on their 'capitalism is good'-train like our government isn't a fascist authoritarian pos that we just shrug and go "it could always be worse :D :D "???? Rude. My point isn't that pointing that out is bad. It's that I frankly don't trust western communists/socialists to be doing the talking.

Good intentions or not, I think western commies are ALSO using the North Koreans to make a point, the same way western capitalists are. Maybe you can call it the lesser of two evils but lemme put it like this:

In the Elephant Man, there's an argument to be made that even though he's not beaten and shamed anymore, Joseph Merrick is still being treated like a sideshow freak in the hospital. Think of the regretful NK defectors as Merrick - abused and used for profit by outside capitalists who demand they "pull their weight" and all that other vile shit we say about communist citizens like they aren't even people and victim blame them for their own abuse - to act like you can't also be exploiting them+using them to further your own talking points+weaponizing their pain because your core interest is hating your own country and waxing poetic about how well someone else must have it...well...that's what's gets me mad.

Defectors will talk at length about how they want to go back home to NK but CAN'T because their government will kill them and our world governments won't let them, how their lives were generally better in North Korea but they left because they knew it was abusive and the government did not care about them (or the socialism they spouted) - I think it's its own brand of dehumanizing to hop on these people's lives, as westerners, and be all: "UUuuaaugh but you HAVE to go LeninistMarxist DON'T YOU KNOW our country is evil, actually? Lookit these ppl they had the good life!!!"

tl;dr: I don't trust communist rhetoric+sympathy from people who haven't lived in or under communist countries themselves.

People who hold up those ideals in spite of a country that tried to use that to suppress their rights are iron-willed. Ya'll are talking out your butt and out of (understandable) spite for your own garbage fascist countries. I get it- but please recognize that you're also using ppl's lives for your own gain, even if you mean well.

((inb4 "North Korea isn't communist technically-" yeah yeah I know but they call themselves communist and socialist tumblr puts them in the communist umbrella))

[doktor-peet]

So I've been thinking about the fact that after a person dies, there are several options for the body to be put to rest, like the usual. Cremation and Coffins right? There are more unusual ways to be buried, like people dispersing ashes into the winds or into the ocean. And then there are real unusual ways that take the body and give it some function after death, like being buried at the base of a tree that gets planted, so for one, nature takes care of the body and secondly the tree has then parts of the person that is layed to rest at its base, within it. The person becomes part of the tree. Which is pretty poetic and a nice way to help nature as well as have a "tombstone" that is unique.

Ones ashes could also be put and made into live ammunition to be then shot out of a gun, which after i heard about it, didn't surprise me that it originated from the US, but it's also pretty unusual.

All that got me thinking about what to do with my own mortal shell once i am gone, which hopefully won't happen for at least another 50+ years.

There is a service that will make one's ashes into a diamond. Its made by applying a ton (figurative, its way more than a ton) of pressure to the ashes along with more carbon and possibly other minerals iirc to form a diamond of a specific ordered size and coloration. So that got me thinking about the applications for a diamond and the use of the term "family jewels". Like in many older movies there will be a moment where their is a mention of "oh these are the families jewels, heirlooms from our ancestors and grandparents" Plot twist: these diamonds are the ancestors. The countless precious gemstones that line elaborate necklaces and bejeweled earrings each have been a single person in their former life.

While this alone might be macabre for some, what if we take a fantasy setting. The people's souls are trapped within these crystallized shapes of their former bodies, granting the person who wears the jewelry some form of power. Like say a lich for example. What if a lichs phylactery was his remains compressed into a diamond where his soul resides, put into a circlet that the liches new undead body is wearing.

Swords right? Everybody loves them, Everybody has a favorite one, having a sword up on your wall instantly enhances the flair of any room. There was a post going around here on Tumblr talking about the amount of blood that it would take to make a sword out of the iron from said blood. Turns out it would take the blood of 500 or so people.

Vampire lord, summoning a sword from blood after a killing spree in a city. Or that lich we've talked about, maybe he made a similar sword and put the gemstone with his soul not onto a crown but into the hilt of the sword.

Now this is where i propose the idea: a persons body turned into a diamond. A sword smithed not from the blood of 500 people but maybe with a vial of blood from the former living person. The sword can be of the design that late person chose in life, maybe with a really nice engraving like "in life and in death still, i will protect the ones i love" and in the handle, maybe in the crossguard, the person-diamond is put into.

Imo its way cooler to have a sword be the tombstone as well as have the body right beside it. Also it's more awesome than an urn that just collects dust on the mantle.

Think about it: "oh nice sword you got there"

"yeah it is my grandma"

"you mean your grandmas?"

"No, this sword is made from parts of my grandmother. If anything, she always wanted us to be safe"

So anyway thanks for coming to my ted talk about funerals and Swords.

[wewillbeseen-butnotbeheard]

wowwwwwwww

i have a lot of words to say. wtf

i was the person who sent the anonymous message but i never noticed that anybody answered until over 10 days later it seems.

wtf?

sorry i guess. it’s actually vile behaviour and i can recognise that, and i have very fluctuating views on your community, so again, sorry. maybe my “apology” won’t mean anything in like two days time because ill have switched once more. once again, at least right now, for what it is worth, from the bottom of my heart i’m sorry about that

im not asking for forgiveness because i dont need it. but please know i actually mean it when i’m making a shoddy attempt of an apology right now.

BUT ANYWAY. this isn’t exactly the awesome own everybody is acting like it is, not because i disagree, or because it’s not good writing (it is great writing actually) but because i was LITERALLY projecting MY own issues. i hate that i do this.

literally. i WANT to turn into things and become things that aren’t physically possible to become. I WANT etc etc etc. and it’s causing me to struggle. yet i have to suck it up like everybody else. reading the wording of my own message again makes it very painfully clear that i was thinking that.

GOD why do i do this?

i was fully conscious of that when i was doing it, and only now am i realising that maybe i wasn’t intending for anybody (you) to reply because it’s fucking me up. that message was first intended for myself. it’s a TERRIBLE way to get my own frustrations and problems out. and i will say again. what the fuck? i think you weren’t supposed to flip this whole thing on its head like this. the message was about me. i can’t alleviate my own issues with having to be a human so i wanted to inflict it onto others, or people that think of themselves as being something else.

(BECAUSE THEY’RE THE ONLY INDIVIDUALS WHO FEEL THE SAME AS I DO)

how the fuck do i react to this then? what the fuck does this mean for me then? i’m not exactly sure how to feel about this reply. everything feels so perfectly and poetically ironic and i don’t know what to make of it. this isn’t even the first time something like this has happened.

i’m sorry again i guess. i know that doesn’t really change the fact that i am a huge DICK, and it doesn’t rid anyone of any pain that i may have very purposefully caused, but the point stands that i am a RAGING HYPOCRITE and i was just talking about myself. i don’t really know where to go from there. i probably could say so much more than this.

wow. the joke is so much more on me than i think you could ever know.

wtf i guess

sorry to be a hater of sorts. but you are not an animal, or whatever else other than a human that you happen to identify as.

it is not about wanting. it is about BEING, and if you look in the mirror you’ll realise you’re just a human. it doesn’t make a difference if you struggle with it. get over it. a lot of people have to get over it. you cannot be indulged in a fantasyland 24/7. quite simply, grow up

Huh, I don't think I've gotten one of these asks since 2017...

First things first, starting off a rather hateful and concern-trolling message with "sorry" doesn't alleviate you of any potential harm done. You're trying to upset me. You're rude, you're mean, and you clearly realize it, since you're only willing to say these things anonymously. Don't try to soften your blows by apologizing preemptively. It's bitchy at best and belittling at worst.

I'm gonna take a guess and say this is a copy-pasted message, since you couldn't even be bothered to name my therio-/kintypes. How many other people have you tried to upset with these messages? And for what reason? What's your goal? Is the world not cruel enough already?

But I'll give you the benefit of the doubt, since these kinds of messages have become such a rarity, and since I haven't written anything for this blog in months. Consider it an invitation to reach out again some day, once you've mulled things over. I'll get vulnerable with you and lay myself bare, and in return I hope you'll consider seeing me as a person, instead of just a target for your anger.

You say reality, identity, and self-perception ('cause that's what this is; that's what otherkinity is) is about being, not wanting. I say that's an oversimplified worldview.

Who can we be if there's nothing we want? A person without desires is hardly a fully realized person. The identity of the person who wants something is as genuine as the identity of the person who has achieved something - even if they're perceived differently, and their material realities are different. The musician who dreams of going platinum, but who never gets out of dingy bars and self-published mixtapes, will still see a musician when she looks in the mirror - even if others just see a mediocre hobbyist. Even if others compare her to professionals, natural talents, and nepo-babies, whose achievements she can never hope to reach. Should the wanting musician let others define for her what it means to be a musician? Even if her music is bad and she'll never hit it big? She wants to be a musician. She plays because of her desires. She lives her life according to her wants. Does that not make her wants a part of who she is?

To some extent you are what you want. The line between wanting and being is blurry.

I do want to be nonhuman, on some level. I'd gladly give up this life to live as a gnoll. I suppose my desires are fantastical, but no less so than those of the poor musician who dreams of going platinum. Should she stop playing because she'll never achieve her dreams? Should I stop calling myself a gnoll just because I'll never have the body of one? I act out being a gnoll, through my digital persona, my fantasy scenarios, and my art. I do what I can to be a gnoll. I am as much an embodiment of my desires as the mediocre hobbyist musician is.

Have you ever gotten what you wished for?

I collect trading cards as a hobby. After years of searching, I got some of my dreamies and completed parts of my collection. I felt satisfied for a day, but the satisfaction quickly turned into boredom and listlessness. My instincts (be they human or gnoll) crave the hunt more than the kill. I get a greater thrill out of wanting than achieving. I wouldn't be happy without my unachievable desires.

I think, on some level, to want is to be.

And while my wants may be strange, at least they don't involve deliberately trying to hurt other people.

[lucky-at-the-end-of-the-world]

Entry 1: The End Times!

For as long as I can remember I've had the urge to run away. From home, from life — from myself. I spent my tween years with my eyes turned out of bus windows, unseeing as the little houses passed by, thinking about how it would feel to just get off at a random stop and go. Nowhere. Anywhere. 

I'd thought that maybe I'd have a better life by now and that I'd have outgrown this urge. But I don't and I haven't so at twenty-three I still do things like stare blankly at train cars when I’m taking the trash out at work and think about how easy it could be to hop them like some coming of age movie. I guess I'm a little old for coming of age, huh? 

Anyways I still get this feeling.

The need to leave everything behind and slip away into nothing. Not even a different life, just nowhere. To dissolve.

Of course I can't do that. I mean I definitely could but that plan involves a plane ticket, asking an old friend to take in my two cats and scrawling some waterproof apology to whatever poor park ranger would stumble across the body of a suicide victim with a collection of ironically optimistic tattoos. (There Is Still Time, and I Must Still Have Hope. Is there? Must I?)

Since I can't in good conscience do any of that, I do the next best thing. At nine or ten at night I pull on my boots and I walk to the gas station in the bad part of town. I buy a pack of Marlboro Reds even though I'm not a smoker, and I choke a couple down in the nearby park. They make me sick (again, not a smoker) and I walk home dizzy in the dark.

It's not much but it's something. When you're as anhedonic as I am, and when the line of ambivalence you walk is so thin that most days you have one foot on either side, you get pretty good at appreciating something. Even if that something makes you feel sick and is completely out of character.

The first time I did it felt like a relief.

I’m not a voyeur, I don’t think (autocorrect had to help me spell that word so I think that’s a point in my defense), but I’m a chronic wallflower and if I could afford therapy or diagnoses I’d probably be slapped with an anxiety disorder of some sort. Talking to people is hard and being seen by them is harder. In the cover of night I feel almost safe. Safe because I’m unseen and safe because I’m unnoticed. 

Safe because walking out in the open and smoking are both things that are completely out of character for me. It feels liberating in some small pathetic way. Like disappearing and killing myself slowly over the course of weeks one cancer stick at a time. Since I started this habit I can’t stop the idea that I’m just methodically hammering one more nail in my coffin until the day I’ve realized that it’s sealed and there’s no walking back home— Reader, do you know what I mean? Probably. It’s not all that profound. And hey, today’s news has made it even more meaningless. Awesome!

Ever since I was a little girl I’ve known I wanted to be a depressed cliché waxing poetic about common emotions like they’re made somehow more special because I’m the one feeling them. 

Back to today’s news, though. I think it’s pretty cool. The end of the world. Sorry T.S Eliot, it’s neither bang nor whimper but a slowly arriving and unstoppable asteroid. I always knew we were no better than dinosaurs and now the universe proves me right! The universe also is taking away my choice as I have so often asked her to do over burning incense and T.J.Maxx tarot decks. 

I guess if this is the first time you’re hearing about it (which would be weird, how did you even find my blog) we’ve been given about two years before the day of impact. Give or take. Hopefully take. Sorry if you’re someone who likes being alive and is enjoying your time here on earth, but the rest of us are collectively relaxing and handing the narrative over to whatever comes next.

For me that’s being out here at ten and smoking again. The park is always empty and tonight’s no different. I’ve even dragged the shitty little wooden picnic table out from under the metal awning so I can stargaze. Who’s gonna stop me? It’s the end times, people are doing much worse than moving picnic tables. Then again in this part of town they were doing that anyway.

Not that you’d be able to tell since this is a blog, but I just spent the last twenty minutes staring at the stars and almost forgot I was writing this. This tiny pass-through town is heavy with light pollution so the stars aren’t exactly glamorous, but they’re basically just as pretty as anywhere. Especially tonight.

Tonight they’re a shimmering curtain taking two whole years to open for a very very special end of the world show— just for Earth. 

Sorry again to anyone who’s bummed about the whole dying soon thing but I’m pretty…relieved. No more stress, no more worries. I’ve blinked away two years before without even noticing, this should be a cake walk. I’m still a little scattered on how to spend them. The only plans I’ve ever made in my life are how to end it, so I guess I’m thrown. I have a couple of ideas, though. I mean…I have always wanted to die in a National Park. 

I wonder if two years is enough to see them all. At least a few, right? Enough to pick out a favorite? 

If anyone actually does read this, good luck out there.

— Dan

[liopleurodean]

Season 10, Episode 6: Ask Jeeves

Huh. That's poetic

Oh boy

Rip

Honey, don't do it

Spooky

You shouldn't have tried to steal from her

Real pearls would have had knots between them, to prevent that exact situation

Oh dear

Baby!

That's not enough coffee

What's that incorrect quote with the friendship bracelet?

Dean.

Of course!

Wow

...what?

Next best thing

Had to Google that bc I thought it might be a Gilmore Girls reference, turns out she's an actress who was on Beverly Hills

Right

It's the Provenance auction all over again

Probably

Yikes

Unfortunately not

Sure

Um...

What does that mean?

Knives Out vibes

Good for him

Aw, Sam called him dad!

Uh...

Honestly? Same. They're both right

Ha! The hard way

I guess

DEANS FACE 😂

Probably

Their savior

Dean.

Good for him!

This is awesome

Of course

Not in there, Dean

Also kind of religious

There it is

That's weird

Ouch

Very Knives Out of them

That was not a girl's voice

Spooky

Poor girl

That's gonna get old

Ouch

Uh oh

They weren't there for the murder

This is fantastic

It does look suspicious

Something like that

He's so right for that reference

Wow

Dean.

Gee, I had no idea

Oh, Sam

Pulling the ditz card

Interesting

Whaaat

I want one of those so bad

You will soon

Awesome

THE LEAD PIPE

AND THE ROPE

There's a Clue box!!!!!

This is so cool

And spooky

The candlestick

Um

...what is he hiding?

Nope

Having fun, Sam?

Try saying that 5 times fast

Yeah...

Okay... what version of Dracula is Dean referencing? Cause it'd be awesome if it was the original

Uh oh

Not now

She's drunk

I'm sure

Really???

Ah, there it is

The wrench!

Smooth

Great question

Is that supposed to be the knife?

Sam.

Dean, that's not the butler

Right...

I hope that's an iron wrench

Uh oh

Oh great, a shifter

That's nasty

Yup

Is that even really her?

Good enough

She's clear

Because they can't use Tinder

Uh huh

Sam sandwich

I don't like this

He doesn't like it either 😂

Uh oh

Oh, THERES the candlestick

Yikes...

Right

Alright then

Poor Sam

Yup!

Poor girl

A shape shifter, if you really want to know

Oh, Dean 😂

Oop, there it is

Nope, don't do that

Yeah

...touche

There's the gun

Dean's a faster draw than you

Ouch!

Not real silver

If you can get out

Trigger safety

Obviously not, if you're so stupid with a pistol

Hey, Baby's a work of art!!!

...

She's the shifter

They're running out of time

Of course, she would give them the fake silver

What???

The attic

No, I think she's got it right. It's obvious that Bunny was a movie buff

Good for him

Pfft, please

It's not his fault

Honey, you have no clue

Wanna bet those are silver?

Yikes

Valid reaction

Uh oh

He tried to deal with the shifter problem

Was Lance a shifter? Or was it an affair?

Affair it is

Of course

But Bunny wouldn't let him

Tangle moment

Where's Dean?

Sam would know

Ah. Dean's getting bullets

But Dean does!

...Dean, you can stop now

Good for him

Nah, you weren't entirely wrong

Sam and Dean don't need it

Gas money

They don't want the publicity

Empty threats

They got the best parking spot

Come on, Sam, isn't it obvious?

ITS THE MARK OF CAIN. BE SMART

Dean.

He sounds like a teenager

His voice is off

Bob Seger!

Aw

[leafatlaw]

!!! This so awesome ! I’m so glad you responded to this post (basically the entire point of THSI post was to see what other people thought) !

Okay so tldr I wrote this post at about 12 at night and didn’t look over it again. So a lot for he funkiness can be explained by that. Similarly thsi post was done in a more “poetic” way than actual factual. I also wrote this before secret life , which similarly I feel like follows the trend limlife started .

Anywyas with excuses out of the way onto your points!

Limited life is such an outlier ! I feel like secret life is even more intense (albeit maybe because of forced tension w/ some of the tasks) and that’s so strange to me.

Double life is so ironic, turns out the best way to play was 1 v 2s with people who have shared heath. Scarlet Pearl <333

Yeah I agree “calmer” is a terrible word to use for it, I don’t know what I was thinking. I think I was looking for, like more known( they’ve been through this before). Or maybe more personal ? What I was trying to say was that 3rd life to me, felt very much like a war between two factions (red army vs everyone else) and last in comparison had more smaller teams. It’s very different vibes is what I meant to say, it does feel more bloody. Horror movie/ zombie movie esc.

Ok I too am a Scott pov viewer, and I think I was pulling too much from his tactics in other seasons for this title. In last life I was mostly just thinking of his idea of getting Cleo on his team, and not killing anyone as boogy that last time, in adoption to trying to team up with the reds until his Allie’s die. I think faction was again the wrong word still lol.

Also in response to your tags

Skynet is a good point for lack of walls (which honestly I don’t know how effective they were in the first place), and an interesting development as well. Next season they need to make some sort of underground tunnel system.

there’s something poetic in the different ways the life series different twists add to the stories they tell. 3rd life is desperate and brutal. 3 lives is all you get and then your out no if ands or buts. Each life is more precious than diamonds, and the taking of a life(desert duo) requires a similar payment in return. and the stakes are oh so high so it gets down to a two team battle and then it’s over.

In direct contrast, last life is almost calmer, in comparison. People have up to 5 lives, a seemingly insane sun in comparison to the previous three. The lives are traded and won and gifted. People share lives. They tick down to red slowly and with the entire server fighting against it. It’s a tactician that wins because it wasn’t about fighting this time it was about teams and betrayals and promises.

Double life is a return to form in a way. After last life it’s three lives again or more accurately one and a half. Everything’s shared and all your enemies are halved or doubled.

Finally limited life rolls around with its new idea: there’s no set number of lives. It’s all about time. Technically all the player start with approximately 24 lives but the clock itself is against you as well for this game. In short limited life is anything but limited. There’s more lives more freedom more time, ironically enough. And due to this being the fourth season there’s more partnership already and it’s easily to build on. They’ve got the hang of this now and they’re willing to try to mix things up. Limited life so so shockingly free from the constraints of its former series, there’s family drama, an episode where someone afks, there’s flowerhusbands, it’s full of callbacks and references, and in that way the finale ends diffenrly as well. The added twist of a betrayal unlike what we’ve seen before

[parksrway]

hello parker hope ur having a great day!!

anyway i was just thinking that. its very interesting how sheik and link’s dynamic parallels link and zelda’s pre calamity in the game. where its like kind of misunderstood resentment which eventually develops into genuine care and affection for each other once they spend more time together. its so thematically similar but also completely different in a way,, cause obvs they are completely different characters with very different back stories. (and link pre and post calamity are very different people as well) and we havent seen much (yet!! im so excited to see how u develop it) of zelda’s role in your au. anyway. idk if this makes any sense but hrhrhhh parallels!!! and connecting themes of being given a destiny you never wanted but finding people to stand with you through it all. gosh darn it its so poetic and you are so awesome for it. anyway i would love to hear your thoughts about this!! only if you want to though <33333

YES YES EXACTLY!!!

I want there to be clear parallels between them (because of the whole. you know. sheik being Zelda thing) while they're still their own individuals!!

I think one thing that gets me is and makes it a little sadly ironic is that Zelda ended up putting sheik through something similar to what she went through (not exactly the same but still very similar) which ends up making sheik resent her a little bit like how she was with her father (he eventually works past it though)

it's all just. a little sad because sheik technically isn't even that big of a role so he doesn't understand why he had to get dragged into everything. like. link holds the master sword, Zelda holds the triforce and sheik is, what? he's essentially there to die in order to make sure everything works out. and he's 18 so. that's not a good feeling when your "destiny" is literally to die before you even turn 20. (it really fucks up how he sees himself as you can imagine. he pretty much stops valuing his life because well. it's basically told to him that it really doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things)

which is also similar to Zelda. (not really the whole dying part obviously) but like. what she wants to do and be isn't important, and she's forced to be someone else for the greater good of Hyrule. her identity outside of just "the princess" is treated as pointless.

they're just. both sad and fucked up and were forced into a situation they weren't ready for.

[ddarker-dreams]

omg omg okay lock. i read ALL your yan!albedo ones for probably the 586th time, and i’m still not over any of them. i love love looove the characterisation and the creepiness you bring along with him, it’s thrilling, really! i love how you somehow incorporate his little habits like noting everything darling does or feels and that too so subtly. you have so much talent gaaaah it’s like a pleasure to read through your works. and i’m ngl, i was originally a diluc bitch but now you have successfully converted me to an albedoajaxscara bitch. my favs are flower of eden and live and learn *insert lip bite*. you have this way with writing albedo which makes him so- uncanny. and eerie. and hot. no like- idk how talented you are. coz you always manage to portray him as the calm and emotionless person that he is w darling, yet also manage to show his infatuation and obsession w them through little giveaways. his curiosity is also an element i think is very important to write about in this context and you manage to bring it out everytime. like he views his darling as a sort of experiment at the same time. no but fr, you’re so good :o. if i had a buck for everytime i squealed in excitement when you posted a hc or just how genshin boiz will react to certain things, i’d be able to buy a vacation home and yacht. no cap. so when u wrote you were thinking of writing that chaptered fic w albedo (i know you’re just thinking about it, so no pressure) i was on top of the world. like the thought of albedo being written by you again makes me hhhhhh oh so excited n heppi. you’re the best! anyways long story short: you’re awesome and you should keep going, i love ur works so much and smile like *insert teeth* everytime you post. keep well, okay? ly!

ANON I'M GONNA PRINT, LAMINATE, FRAME AND HANG UP THIS COMMENT ON MY WALL ,, i thought it was interesting that i received this around the time i was working on the yan albedo story posted earlier thjrkgmer

i feel like the best appeal to albedo is how he can be logical yet kinda poetic at the same time? my original interpretation of him was pretty clinical and detached, but i think he's more of a dreamer type than i gave him credit for. especially when it comes to his darling. he follows a set routine mostly to give himself some structure, or else he'd be drooling over his darling at every second. needs little things to occupy himself with so he still feels like a rational person.

AA i try to make him uncanny, especially in stories where it's from the reader's POV... where it's like he's not doing anything obviously strange, but you get that gut instinct that something's off. really, that's all his darling would have to go off of. he's too well planned to slip up and reveal anything damning. so darling doesn't have much to go off of.

i'm excited to start ironing out details for the albedo story!!! i know i do want to do it, i'm thinking once hell within reach finishes. it'd be fun timing if his series ended up getting posted around his rerun. i want to try writing yandere series since i've shied away from it in the past. gotta force yourself to try new things ... at least now i know i'm capable of sticking to a long story. i wasn't able to for the longest time 😭

(also, i think a lot of us start off as diluc simps, like an eevee. then we evolve into the various eeveelutions depending on our new interests).

reading through this put the biggest smile on my face, i cannot thank you enough precious anon <33333

[everlastingfable]

One of the first things we learn about Douxie, way back when in Trollhunters, was that he’s a punk rocker, of which a key characteristic is the rejection of conformity and embracing individuality. How ironic is it then, that one of Douxie’s major arcs in Wizards is learning to make his own choices without trying to please someone else. 

A lot of his strongest moments stem from him making his own decisions and not following Merlin’s expectations (using magic on Arthur to get him and Morgana to make up, freeing Nimue, etc). We see Douxie be an awesome Master Wizard in the secret Killahead battle, fighting Morgana with the power of rock, and choosing to save individuals over the greater good. 

I think it’s pretty poetic that Douxie comes full circle learning to embrace the characteristics of punk rock that was used for his introduction.

[penhive]

August 26th 2022

I am writing this for the love of writing. It’s a passion that proceeds from the welling of my heart. The heart is a flower of music. It’s an orchard of poetry. Feelings run like a river in my soul. I am feeling so contented and happy. What must I write, I know not! I imagine my body to be pen, a narcissistic blush. I am very much happy with my fictional self. It is a self of the women I have loved, the poems that I have written, and the cigarettes that I have smoked, the philosophers that I have loved. Yes I would like to transcend all what I have read and epitomize it into an art. Beauty is the soul of love. It is a forest of blossoms. It’s a soul of rhythm. A writer has to defy death. Words have to flow like an ocean. Desires become the tapestry of art. Yes, I have done poetry with her, poetry of songs and rhythms, and a soul of beauty. Beauty to me is a passionate flower. Sometimes my writing is Kafkaesque. Like Kafka I have had a dominating father. Why do I think that I have to accomplish great things as writer? I am not egoistic. I write for the love of writing. Writing is a song of the body. Yes, Nietzsche’s theory of art is so poignant to me. My pen has the harmony of Apollo and the rhythms and beats of Dionysus. My pen is an aesthetic phallus. Yes, the meaning in life is to become a perfect art. Writing is the tapestry to overcome the nihilism of death and suicide. Camus and Sartre were right, we have to authenticate our existence.  We have to become the muse of inspiration. Beauty, you are my lover and companion. Time flows with the rhythm of streams of consciousness. Joyce lived the life of streams of consciousness. Yes, I am closer to Joyce and Wolf. Yes, I am a Ms. Dalloway of consciousness. Yes, why am I writing, I wonder why? I keep asking the question again and again. Writing is muse-music of a work-out. Yes, I long to do poetry with her. Yes, I long to feel the bed of ecstasy. Another one of my favorite authors is Maurice Blanchot a French novelist and philosopher. Yes through writing one has to become a death of defying death. One has to reincarnate with a life of a muse. Writing has to defy the self. It’s grandiose to live the life of a fictional self. Writing is a therapy of existentialism. The Philosopher Sartre has said: ‘man is condemned to be free as he is responsible for the choices he makes’. Yes, responsibility is monster beast of hell. Responsibility is an awesome shmuck. Yes, I live life as a poetic soul. Beauty is congruous with harmony. Writing accomplishes the dream of the body. Writing is a futuristic opera. Yes, I love the beatniks and the ways in which they have lived their life, experiencing life with drugs, alcohol and permissiveness. Ginsberg’s howl is an allegory of cathartic Buddhism. How can we describe the minuteness of life?  I love reading Van Gogh’s letters written to his brother. It is ironic that in his life time he was able to sell only a few of his paintings. But today, he is acclaimed as a famous painter.  It’s wonder to me why he cut his ear for the sake of a prostitute? Yes, I love to watch Van Gogh’s Sower. Van Gog’s painting sower shows a man casting seeds on to a yellowish field.  The Sower can be taken as an allegory of the Messiah Jesus and the seeds his Words. I also like Van Gogh’s Sunflower. The Still Life is a vista of visual poetry. Yes, I also love Salvador Dali very much and his painting: the persistence of memory. The frozen embryo and the melting clocks reflect the inner time of living moments and it also show the mystery of space and time. It could also be a reflection of narcissism of an oedipal conflict. Yes, words are beautiful reflections of poetry. Yes, with words, I melt into a becoming of nothingness. Again I ask why I should write. Writing is an art of poetry and the prose of rhythm. To fall in love with oneself is an aesthetic scandal. Yes, I’m falling in love with the orgy of writing. Writing is actualizing dreams into reality. Writing is a narcissistic mania. Writing is the muse of the pen. I want to live the life of a bard. I want to make love to the paper with my pen.