#I still drink and I still eat sugar and I still eat in general but I have a system and I’m not ashamed of caring about looks

[bonne-chanson]

If you'd be interested, could you write a story about the reader having to take care of Ranpo when he's sick?

a/n: this is perfect timing actually bc i’m down with a cold rn HAJDBKDN eurgh :(( anw, i hope you enjoy this (reverse?) sick fic! not sure if i captured ranpo’s personality enough, but i tried :’> there’s an established relationship here, so if this isn’t your cup of tea and you just wanted reader taking care of ranpo in general, feel free to tell me so i can whip smth up quickly for you! :>

under the weather and your care

✑ character/s: ranpo edogawa x reader

✑ short desc: his immune system is struggling way too much after he playing in the rain and eating lots of candy.

✑ content includes: fluff ; sfw ; established relationship ; sick fic ; nothing to warn anyone about, reader just has to take care of ranpo

✑ word count: 1.6k words

"I told you to drink more water."

Ranpo could only huff at your berating words, crossing his arms childishly while he turns his head away to avoid your stern gaze. As much as he was the world’s greatest detective, his boyish behavior still makes him refuse to acknowledge the fact that you were right to say that too many sweets without drinking enough fluids and having a fever was, indeed, a terrible decision.

A few days earlier, the both of you were assigned to a mission that somehow ended in having to travel to Shibuya for the final piece of evidence. Ranpo, as always, lived up to his title by piecing everything together within half a minute, and the next train to Yokohama wasn’t going to stop by the station any time soon, so he asked himself (and you)—

What harm is there in exploring the city for a little while?

It turned into a spontaneous date of sorts, enjoying all kinds of tourist spots from dressing up and playing around with many colorful fashion pieces in Harajuku to riding go-karts around the emptier streets (which ended in chaos). His favorite, however, and not much to your surprise, was visiting Totti Candy Factory with you in tow, immediately heading over to the buy a big serving of rainbow-colored cotton candy to munch on before grabbing at least two baskets to put the rest of his chosen sweets in (and unfortunately, you ended up going home with five).

Of course, being the ever-loving darling you are to your sugar addict of a boyfriend, you paid for everything. How could you not when he pouted at (coerced) you into bulk-buying them for him?

Everything was fine, even with the amount of candy bags you both had to carry, up until it started to rain.

Shibuya crossing was surprisingly emptier than usual given that it was still mid-noon on a weekday, and the freedom to prance around in the rainwater gave him enough thrill to begin jumping on the bigger puddles of the street, yellow rainboots creating the biggest splashes. Pedestrians and passersby eyed him strangely before avoiding him as they walked along, and you, charmed by his adorable character, thought it was funny—

…Until his boyish antics made him roll around in the puddles simply because it was fun.

It didn’t take much longer before you were dragging him away from the street and bowing your head apologetically at the surrounding people crossing as he whined helplessly. Soon after, you found yourselves sitting on a train back to Yokohama, the cushions wet with rainwater as you sat across each other. The poor detective complained about wanting to cuddle closer to you for some warmth, but you rejected his advances, trying not to get the seats any more wet than they already were.

Of course, you avoided eye contact with him on the way home, guilt gnawing at your insides, and when you gathered enough courage to catch a glimpse of him in front of you all shivering and grouchy, the tug on your heartstrings made itself known. Though, it wasn’t really enough to justify getting your clothes wet in the process, so you forced yourself to look away instead.

(You’d regret that later.)

Yosano could only sigh at the condition your boyfriend was in when the two of you first entered her office, but after prescribing some medicine and her usual advice for common colds and fevers, his body temperature slowly began to go back to normal.

Or so you thought.

The problem is that at some point, when his fever began to simmer down, he remembered the five bags of candy you two had bought the other day and began indulging himself in his sweets instead of sipping the miso soup you’d made for him.

So, his fever is back.

And here you two are, about three days later, with Ranpo currently suffering from a clogged nose and a terrible headache all because he was drenched and cold for too long and you both didn’t have anything to dry him off on the way back to the agency that day.

And now he has a very itchy sore throat to boot.

You sigh, handing him a cup of lukewarm water as he sniffles and scrunches his nose, looking away.

“Ranpo,” you chide, raising a brow. “Come on… your fever won’t die down if you don’t drink enough fluids. You keep refusing tea and soup because they’re too bitter for your taste, so water is your best option. Yosano-sensei said so, remember?”

He sticks his bottom lip out, pouting at you, and for a moment, you almost give in just because you pitied the red-and-stuffy-nosed detective sitting up on his bed.

“But I don’t like the aftertaste of the candy when I drink water!” he barks back. “And I already drank my medicine for today!”

You roll your eyes, but the gesture is followed by a small chuckle. It’s hard to stay impatient with him.

“Yes, but you need a lot of fluids and sleep so the medicine can work. Otherwise, you’ll be out of business for another week,” you explain, bringing the glass closer to his lips. “The agency wouldn’t be anything without their best detective, after all.”

“Their best detective?”

“…The world’s greatest detective.”

It takes him a few moments, but his pouty face is eventually replaced with a big grin and a laugh interrupted by a few coughs. As you rub his back comfortingly, the gesture soothing his coughing storm, he takes the glass from your hand and hums.

“Okay, fine… But only because the agency still needs me!”

A sigh of relief escapes your lips and you smile again, watching him chug the glass down before wiping his lips with his pajama sleeve. Much to his own comfort, the water did, in fact, help with his sore throat, its cooling nature soothing the itchiness irritated earlier by all the sweets he consumed in one sitting.

“See? That wasn’t so bad.”

Refusing to acknowledge that you were, yet again, right, he places the glass back down on the bedside table before grabbing at your wrist to try and pull you closer to him, shoving the blanket out of the way momentarily.

“Ranpo—?”

“Cuddle me,” he says, still trying to drag you onto the mattress. “You didn’t cuddle me on the train back home the other day, so I was all cold and ended up with a fever. The least you could do is to cuddle me now because I’m still all chilly.”

The sheets of his bed begin to rustle when he traps you in his arms, keeping you next to him like a cat with its favorite toy. Your struggle for some space doesn’t go unnoticed—he grins when he spots this, only engulfing you with the tightest embrace he can give and all the affection he has to offer. He doesn’t hesitate when he nuzzles your neck and curls up closer to you, your body heat helping him relax a little from the headache that came with his stuffy nose and high temperature, allowing him to feel a little more at peace with his current condition.

So, with a final grunt, you take the edge of the blanket and use it to cover yourselves as you turn to your side to let him bury his face in the crook of your neck a little more, your fingers threading through his hair. A nap for now would be good for him, you figure, and if your presence helps calm him down enough to lull him to sleep, then you’d gladly stay for hours on end on his bed with him like this.

But he doesn’t fully close his eyes — not yet. He grabs a tissue or two to blow his nose every now and then, dropping the crumpled trash onto the floor next to the bed (you make a mental note to clean up later), but he can’t seem to drift off to dreamland.

“Something on your mind?” you murmur into his hair, petting it fondly.

He lets out a deep sigh in response.

You’re the only person who can ever come close to reading his thoughts as he had allowed himself to open up enough to be vulnerable around you. Despite being able to catch up to him most of the time, there are still moments that are foggy enough to make you ponder about the thoughts whirring about in his head. So, you make it a point to communicate to him as much as possible and ask him whenever the situation needs to be addressed.

And he’s grateful for that. He may very well consider himself a better mind-reader than you, but to have someone care for him in such a way that they also want to know what’s going on in his head when the world often tends to alienate him for being him is a blessing in itself that, although he never mentions it aloud, he’ll cherish forever.

Ranpo opens his mouth.

“…You didn’t give me a good night kiss.”

You blink.

“What?”

“You always give me good night kisses before we go to bed,” he points out. “It’s part of our routine. You didn’t give me one yet, so I can’t sleep.”

It’s almost impossible to hold back the giggle creeping up your throat.

“Ranpo,” you call, stifling the little laughs between words, “I can’t do that right now. I might get sick if I kiss you. You’ll be passing your fever onto me.”

“But if I can’t go to sleep, then I won’t get any better, and I need you to give me a good night kiss to help me go to sleep.”

Damn him and his (childish) logic.

“…Okay.” Deciding to get this done and over with, you cup his cheek. “But only on the forehead, alright? I’m not risking getting your germs right now,” you jest.

Yet the moment you lean in closer, your lips ghosting the skin of his forehead, he tilts his head upward to allow his lips to meet with yours. Your eyes widen and you scrunch your nose a little when he releases a rather obnoxious mwah! after, and as soon as you pull away, you are faced with the cheekiest expression he can muster.

“Ranpo!”

He yawns as you scold his name, snuggling back into your arms again. “Good night, [Y/N]…”

That initial annoyance of yours quickly fades away and you can’t help but shake your head and smile as you cuddle him closer to keep him warm.

You can never stay mad at him no matter how many times fate (rather, the rain and all of his candy in this case) has to put him under your care. You love your detective too much, after all.

a/n: feel free to let me know how i did! this was also my first time writing for ranpo, so i hope i captured him well enough :’>

[navree]

"corporate america is deliberately trying to kill you by making super sugary drinks at coffee shops in order to line the pockets of big pharma!" you guys know you have agency here, right? like, you can choose whether or not to order the ice spice dunkin drink or not. no one is forcing you to only drink an iced coffee with two ice cream scoops of whipped cream on top. if you're drinking that you're choosing to drink that.

[fromfaewithlove]

“You don’t need to workout so much, you don’t need to fast so much…you already look great!!”

Yes I look great not by happenstance but because I have a disciplined practice??? What is not clicking????

[myfandomrealitea]

I know there's a lot of advice for handling things like depression and its so fucking easy for people to say "just do this and you'll feel better!" and I hate that, I fucking despise it, but I'm also gonna throw in my two cents about what is personally helping me get out of bed some days and genuinely, not kill myself.

Its taking care of nature.

Seriously. It sounds stupid and some days it feels stupid, but I put up bird feeders because I live in a semi-rural area where human activity is decimating the local bird population and options for safe feeding. So I put up bird feeders. And now I have like 83 different birds flocking to my garden on the daily and screaming at my window if the feeders are empty. And I've seen generations of baby birds brought to my garden by their parents because this is where the food is.

And I researched what plants and flowers were native to my area and I spent like $5 on a few different seed packets and sprinkled them around the grass and the sad empty flowerbeds and the lawn because the bees have nothing to eat and that's awful and it turns out wildflowers will fucking GROW the moment you look away, but now every spring and summer my lawn is a pretty little multi-colored bug haven.

And I've even gotten the chance to save a few little bug lives because of it. I've taken in cold-shocked bees and given them a warm little tupperware to recover in. I've fed bugs sugar water to get their energy back to take their food home. I've given dying bugs a sheltered, safe place to spend their last moments.

I planted a veggie garden. And I know I'm very lucky in that I have the space to do that, but also, you can grow a lot of things indoors. My friend has literally the smallest apartment you can imagine but she grows chives in her bathroom and grows five radishes at a time in a pot in the kitchen. Literally five. But it makes her so happy every single time she pulls them up or trots off to the bathroom to snip some chives.

I pick trash up every two weeks. The pick stick was like $4 online and I just put the bag out with my bi-weekly trash pick-up and its disgusting but but nobody else is gonna do it and I've only got finite time on this earth. If nobody else is going to pick up that can, I will. Because some innocent wild animal doesn't deserve to get hurt by human ignorance, and I deserve to walk home and see pretty flourishing nature instead of depressing discarded trash like I feel like most days.

I've left water out for the wildlife and watched hedgehogs, local dogs on their walks, squirrels and all sorts stop by to take a drink, because humans are fucking selfish and we're making something as basic as water so hard to access for anyone but ourselves, but I can fix a little bit of that just by putting out a bowl. Sometimes I don't even have to remember to fill it because the rain will fill it for me, and its kind of like nature's way of saying "you're helping me so I'm going to help you out too." Which is neat.

Like most days I do not want to be living on this earth but my god earth did not get a choice about us living here, and we're ruining it, and it actually feels so good to help stop and un-do a little bit of that destruction.

And you don't even have to try everything I do. If the only thing you've got the spoons to do is buy one bird feeder and you only remember to fill it once a month, its still something. That once a month could mean the difference between starvation and a full belly to a bird.

Again, none of this is obligatory and I'm not saying at all this is some magical cure for depression, but personally these things are things which are helping me slowly find things to keep getting out of bed for and things to feel a sense of self worth and satisfaction over. I feel better both in and about myself when I feed the birds, when I see the bugs in the garden, when I pick up the trash.

If its something you haven't considered yet, it might be worth a try.

[peony-always]

Dial Drunk

wolverine/logan howlett x afab!reader

words - 4k

tags: dp&w!Logan, damsel(ish)!reader, angst angst angst (he has so much potential as a sad wet tomcat), feelings (Logan isn't good at them), use of alcohol, canon-typical violence, !attempted assault!, implied assault

quick an: this is my first full fic!! the ghost of Logan's past hovered over my shoulder as I wrote this, loosely based on Dial Drunk by Noah Kahan but it's more of just an inspiration border creds to @/bunnysrph

Logan was pissed. Furious. He was so overwhelmingly angry with himself that his claws had extended and for a while, he couldn’t retract them. He finally got them to slide back under his skin when the cop standing outside his holding cell door threatened to put him in with the general population if he didn’t put his ‘weapons’ away.

That was the last thing he needed right now. He was already on edge, and being surrounded by people who hated him just for who he was would probably be his last straw. He sighed, slumping back against the dirty concrete wall behind him. He rubbed his temples, taking a few deep breaths to calm his once again rising anger.

He understood why he was in that stupid cell. Bar fights were enough to get a normal person arrested for being drunk and disorderly, but cops were always especially ready to arrest a mutant. He hated that he had let his animalistic side get him here, proving them right about how dangerous he was, but he could only take so much of that stupid guy in the booth behind him spewing ant-mutant hatred right in his face.

“Damn liquor,” Logan thought to himself as his head continued to throb. That in and of itself was enough to make him upset, as he was typically so well acquainted with alcohol that it never got to him. Tonight, however, he had drunk way more than usual, throwing back shots in the dingy bar a few blocks from his apartment as quickly as the bartender could pour them up.

The idiotic man he had beaten at the bar wasn’t the true cause of his anger though. That honor fell to his stupid, stupid brain. It was after the cops had wrangled him and shoved him into their stuffy, too-small cruiser that Logan had made his infuriating error.

The driving officer, a short and stocky man with a pudgy face, had looked back at him from the rearview mirror and said,” The guy you were fightin’, George, he ain’t gonna press charges on ya. He’s in and outta the lockup every other week, and he ain’t gonna be lookin’ for any more trouble than he’s already in. Plus, I think you’re more of a danger to yourself than to anybody else, goin’ around that drunk. You ain’t caused any trouble before, but we still gotta bring you in. Procedure, ya know. Got anybody you want us to call to pick ya up?”

Logan hadn’t even thought about it before your name came spilling from his lips. He hadn’t even realized what he said until they arrived at the jail and the pudgy cop pulled him from the back seat. “Her? Really?” the cop said, suspicion heavy in his voice. “She babysits my kids on the weekends, didn’t know she associated with drunk fighters like you.”

Logan snarled on instinct as he heard the inherent prejudice in the cop's voice before he realized who the cop was talking about. ‘No,’, he thought. ‘God, no.’ He hadn’t seen you in months, and he hadn’t been planning on seeing you ever again. He didn’t know why he didn’t tell the cop he wanted to change his call. He could have gotten him to phone Wade or Laura, they would have picked him up in a heartbeat. 

Maybe he didn’t say anything because he wanted to see you, to make sure you were okay after the long months you had spent apart. Or maybe he was just still drunk, forgetting the past and wanting you to take him home with you, to let him have his seat on the couch while he sobered up, drinking your fruity teas and eating the sickeningly sweet cookies you always bought from the local bakery. “Too much sugar and you’ll rot your teeth out,” he’d tell you with a lopsided smile, knowing how you’d respond. Every time he said it you’d prance up to him and poke a finger into his chest, grinning,” You’re already so sweet that my teeth ache, so what does more sugar hurt?” And then you’d lean up, pecking him on the lips as you move to go back to your tasks. 

His heart ached as that memory resurfaced and his head fell to join his back against the unforgiving chill of the cell wall. He tried to fight it (no he didn’t), but his drink-addled brain was unable to stop the memories of you from flooding back into his system.

Your first meeting, a year ago that felt more like ten since you had left. Logan had been stalking his way down the street, huffing and puffing, pissed at Wade for inviting people over and blaring music when he had known that day was Logan’s only day off for two weeks. He had grabbed his jacket and stormed out into the chilly New York evening, turning left outside their apartment as he made his way toward the nearest bar. He craved a stiff drink, damn Wade and Laura had hidden all of the alcohol in the house from him. They told him he needed to dry out, and he did. He knew it as well as everyone else, but it was hard. After years of drowning his guilt and grief in drink, it made him nervous to let go, to face his days head-on instead of looking at them from the syrupy brown lens of his old friend whiskey.

It was on his way to the bar that he heard it. A muffled cry, the sound of flesh hitting concrete, a grunt of pain. He took off in the direction of the sound, his hyper-sensitive nose smelling the fear lacing the air the closer he got to a dingy alley two streets over. As he rounded the corner, he saw you. Your hands were bound behind your back and there was a gag stuffed in your mouth. Your eyes pled with Logan to save you as your attacker dragged you across the ground, mumbling and lurching back and forth as he pulled you along,” Stupid fuckin’ whore. Women. Always gettin’ in the way of what I deserve. Maybe I’ll put you in the dumpster when I’m done with you, let you rot with the flies.” 

Logan’s nostrils flared as he surged forward, yanking your leg from the man’s grip and pushing you further away as your attacker spun to face him. “What the-” was all the scumbag got out before Logan clocked him, knocking him out with one punch. He really wanted to keep beating on the guy, but his enhanced hearing had him turning toward you as you shuddered, whimpers escaping the gag as tears rolled down your face.

He held his hands up, approaching slowly and kneeling on the dirty ground in front of you and gently pulling the gag from your mouth as you squeezed your eyes shut. You let out shuddering sobs as he reached around you to loosen your bindings, careful not to touch you more than he had to. He had experienced more than his fair share of trauma, and he knew how hard it could be to have someone be so close to you when you were going through it, so he made sure to lean back as soon as he had freed you.

However, you immediately proved his assumption wrong. You slumped down against him, your hands fisting his t-shirt as you sniffled and coughed. “Thank-thank you.” you stuttered as you tried to calm yourself. “Thank you so, so much.” Logan tentatively reached around you to pat your back,” You’re welcome, bub. Just doin’ what needed to be done.” As his hand tapped out a soothing beat against your back, you felt yourself begin to come down from the adrenaline rush of almost being kidnapped. You thought back to the man’s ugly words, sniffling again as you whispered, “He was going to kill me.”

Logan bristled immediately, his hand coming to a halt on your back. “Never would have let that happen, ya hear me. I’d have heard ya from a mile away,” he grunted and gently stood to his feet, pulling you up with him. 

“You live close?” he asked.

“Yes,” you replied. “Just down the street.”

He finally got a good look at you, and by God were you pretty. Even with bits of gravel leaving red divots in your cheeks and your eyes watery with tears, you were among the most beautiful women he’d ever seen. He shook himself out of his daze as you took a deep breath and started walking shakily down the street. He tried to stay close but not too close as you walked, following behind you and scenting the air for any more threats. He sure as hell didn’t want to put you through anything else tonight.

The two of you walked in silence until you finally stopped, turning to face Logan as you stood outside the lobby door of your apartment complex. You managed a slight smile as you looked up at him, “I’m sorry that I’m not inviting you in,” you said. “It’s just that this evening has been hellish and I’d like to be alone.”

Logan shook his head, stepping back, “No, no, I understand, I’ll be-”. You cut him off,” Come tomorrow around noon. I’ll treat you to coffee for saving me.” You said this forcefully, almost demanding him to do as you said. It shocked Logan, and a small smile made it’s way onto his lips. “Yes, ma’am.” You thanked him one more time and headed into your building, leaving Logan standing outside, staring at the doors, more curious about you than he had been about anyone in a good long while. 

He did show up the next day, letting you take him to a quaint cafe and buy him a coffee, plain black, which you teased him for. You spent what felt like hours asking him questions and telling him about yourself, and it felt so right, so natural for both of you. Just being there with you was enough to take Logan’s mind off of the things that haunted him, solely focused on your beautiful face and animated expression.

When you realized you had been yapping at this near-stranger for almost 3 hours, you figured it was time to go, gathering your trash and standing up, blush heating up your cheeks. “Thank you again,” you said. “For saving me last night and for letting me talk your ear off today.” Logan flashed you a small smile, tilting his head slightly, “How about the same time tomorrow then? My treat.”

He watched your face light up and thought to himself that he’d go broke buying you coffee if you’d just keep looking at him that way. You quickly agreed, telling him that you’d definitely be there if he wouldn’t mind you being a little late, as work was a little further than your apartment. 

And so it began, the two of you had gotten closer and closer, until a random Tuesday when you blurted out that you wanted to be his girlfriend, if he’d have you. After teasing you about your blush, he of course agreed, claiming that you had been his girlfriend for weeks and you had just noticed. 

You brought him around to your place, where you cooked with him, watched all your favorite movies, and made love. He brought you around to his place, too. You met Wade and Al, which prompted the discussion about his mutation and history. You took everything in stride, reassuring Logan that his past changed nothing, that you were still his if he was still yours. He found a job at a local community college, taking training classes and becoming one of the campus security officers. He quit drinking so much, instead relying on your perfectly brewed cups of coffee to get him through the day, only having a drink or two after work if you were feeling like it.

Logan had never been happier. It was like you were made for him. He took care of you and in turn, you soothed his battered soul. No one had ever touched him with the tenderness that you did, no one ever made him feel as good as you. His existence had become pure bliss and he felt he finally had a purpose again. 

Your lives went on this way for a year and three months, until, just like with every other good thing he had ever had, he ruined it. 

Logan had come to your place before you got off work, aiming to surprise you with dinner after you had complained of a particularly hard week. He had just stepped through the door when he stopped cold, smelling that someone was here, or had been here recently. It wasn’t a scent he recognized, and he prowled through the apartment, checking every room thoroughly for an intruder. When he found no one, he made his way back to the kitchen, still uneasy.

It was there that he saw the papers on the counter, one neat little stack that would change his life. He moved the blank paper on top and a chill shot up his spine. It was a photo of you, taken when he was sure you thought no one was watching. It showed you through the window of your apartment, a soft smile on your face as you put on a coat over your work uniform. He could even make out the locket around your neck that he had given you for your anniversary. 

He moved on to the next pages, letters detailing your entire life, down to how much your water bill had been that month. 

It was the second to last page that sealed his fate, his name next to a summons, a set of coordinates he was to come to or they would kill you. He quickly thought to himself that he could protect you from anyone who tried to hurt you, then immediately realized that that wasn’t the kind of life he had wanted to give you, always on the run and afraid for your life. No, he would have to end things with you and go take care of this mess himself. It broke him to think of hurting you in the way that he would be required to. You were so resilient, so passionate, and stubborn when it came to him. He would have to destroy all of that to get you to leave him alone.

And so, he sat down in the living room and waited, tucking the papers into his jacket so you wouldn’t see them. Dread filled his bones, dragging him down into the couch and he thought he might not make it out of your apartment alive.

It wasn’t much later when he heard the front door open, your lively humming filling his ears and making him feel so much worse. He stayed seated as you made your way through the apartment, shedding your bag and coat as you went.

“Oh, Lo! You scared me!” you said as you saw him, your hand going to your chest in mock shock. “What are you doing here before me?”

Logan swallowed and spoke, trying not to let his voice shake,”We need to talk.”

Your smile dropped instantly and you moved toward him, balking when he held a hand up to stop you. “Lo, you’re scaring me. What’s wrong?”

The look on your face was killing him, so he looked away as he spoke,”I want to break up.”

You sank down to your knees, squinting as you tried to get him to meet your eyes,” What? Lo, what happened? I promise we can figure it out together. You’ve just got to tell me what’s wro-”

“I cheated,” he said, cutting you off. “I don’t want to be with you anymore. I want to be with her.” As soon as he said it, he knew if he could just convince you that he had really broken your trust that way, you’d be done with him.

You laughed slightly, awkwardly,” Logan, that’s not funny. You shouldn’t say things like that. Did I do something wrong or make you mad? I’m sorry for whatever I did, but you really shouldn’t lie.”

The look on your face was almost enough to break his resolve, but the need to protect you won out over his impending grief, “I’m not joking. I’m done with this relationship and I’m done with you. I've found something better.” He felt so wrong saying those words, knowing you feared that you weren’t good enough for him.

“Lo-Logan, please, we can work this out. I can do better, I can be better if you’ll just tell me what you need that I’m not giving you. Please.”

You reached out and grabbed his sleeve, your expression pleading. Logan felt his heart that you had mended shatter back into a million pieces, standing up and ripping his sleeve from your grasp.

“Are you stupid?” he asked, injecting as much venom into his voice as he could. “I said I don’t want you anymore. I don’t want you stupid food, or your stupid gifts, or your pathetic love. I’m done. Do you hear me? Get it through your thick skull and stay away from me. I never want to see you again.” He turned away from you as he walked toward the door, stomping over his heart on the way.

He shook you off again as you grabbed his pant leg, still on your knees on the floor. Your voice warbled as you begged.  “Logan, baby, please,” you cried. “I can change I swear. I can be whatever you need. Just please don’t leave me. You’re my whole life. You make me so happy. I can’t-I can’t do it without you. Please.”

He risked one glance back at you, telling himself he needed to see your face one more time to remind himself why he was leaving. The sight of you on the floor, tears pouring down your cheeks, was killing him. He should have known that he couldn’t have you, that something would force him to leave, but he had foolishly hoped that he could spite whatever higher power kept hurting him by keeping you.

“Don’t come around,” he spat with as much vitriol as he could muster. “I won’t contact you, and you don’t contact me. Let’s make this as easy for you as possible. Just forget I ever existed.”

He didn’t look back again, didn’t watch you weep as you began to mourn what you thought would be forever, knowing you could never stop loving him, even now that he hated you.

Logan groaned, leaning forward against his knees as he came back to himself, his heart aching as painfully as it had when he had lived it the first time. After he had left you, he had gone to the coordinates on the papers he had taken from the apartment. They led to a rural town in Quebec, a place he couldn’t remember but felt like he had been before. There, he met up with a gang of mutant hunters who believed that somehow the universe’s Logan had come back from the dead. They tried to kill him again and threatened him with more violence toward you if he didn’t die willingly. Fat chance. Logan was a newly hollow man and had no qualms about tracking and slaughtering every one of the mutant hunters so that his kind could live in a semblance of peace. 

He stayed up north for a while, squatting in an abandoned cabin and letting his instincts rule him. That was better than having his every waking thought be filled with how he had left you broken on your living room floor, believing that he had betrayed you.

Eventually, he went back to Vancouver. Somehow, his job let him come back, and Wade didn’t pester him with questions (probably because Logan had almost bitten his head off after he asked the second one).

He had considered going to your apartment now that the threat against you was handled, but he knew that as soon as he found happiness with you he’d have to leave again. It was for your own good, really. He wanted you to be happy, and you couldn’t be happy if Logan was constantly walking out on you.

So he went to work and started drinking heavily again, which had led him to the inside of a holding cell, coming to terms with the fact that he would be there all night.

As soon has he had laid down on the hard metal bench he had been sat on for hours, he heard footsteps approaching. He turned his head and watched the cop approach, fully expecting him to say that you had hung up as soon as you heard what they were asking of you. Maybe you hadn’t even answered and Logan would get another call. 

What he didn’t expect, however, was for the cop to swing the cell door open and grunt at him, motioning for him to get up. Logan quirked up a brow as he stood, “Is it chow or somethin’?” he asked. The cop chuckled, “You sure you’d rather eat the slop they serve here than leave with the pretty little lady that came to get you? She signed your papers, so you’re good to go. And please, don’t come back.”

Logan almost stumbled as he processed what the cop had said, his mind racing as he sniffed the air. 

You.

You were here, close. Your scent was so strong. Logan’s heart clenched. He truly believed he would never smell you again, the sweet musk of your skin paired with your perfume. He slowly turned, and there you were.

You were soaking wet, your hair drenched and your mascara slightly smudged, a jean jacket falling from your shoulders. Something was wrong, though. You were hunched over yourself, almost cowering in his presence. Your hands shook as you pulled your jacket further up your arms. Logan would have thought nothing of it and assumed you were just cold if you scent hadn’t changed. He could smell fear on you, a fear he hadn’t come into contact with since the night you met.

You turned and started walking toward the jailhouse door, glancing over your shoulder to make sure Logan was following you. He caught up to you in a couple strides, staying slightly behind you to give you your space. All he wanted was to reach out and touch you, to hold you in his arms again, but he resisted. On one hand, he was immensely grateful that you had come to get him. On the other hand, he felt so guilty that you had come to save someone who had broken your heart.

The two of you walked out into the rain, Logan still following you. You led him to a small car, one that you hadn’t had when he left you. He didn’t move as you rounded the car to get in, assuming he’d walk back to Wade’s from there.

“Get in, Logan,” you said quietly. 

He took a deep breath as he opened the passenger seat and got in, leaning forward so as to get as little water on your seats as possible. “Thank you,” he said. “Really, you didn’t have to come get me. I don’t even know why I gave them your name. I’ve just had too much to drink and-”

It was only then that you turned to face him, your face illuminated softly in the hazy light from the lamps lining the street. He scanned your face, his blood running cold as he saw your black eye and split lip, your eyes bright red with shed tears. “Logan,” you said, cutting him off. You took a deep, shaky breath, “We need to talk.”

[damiansgoodgirll]

HIIIIIII I saw you're Damian and Rhea x reader that you just posted AND I HAVE A IDEA (No rush I'm just sending it so I don't forget)

OKAY SO in the same universe as the previous fic what if backstage on Monday night raw finn starts trying to convince the reader to join the new judgment day (bc he obviously still cares for the kid) like trying to get jd or Dom to guilt trip them or even getting liv Morgan to be buddy buddy since reader had trouble making friends.

But the reader STAYS LOYAL to the terror twins 🖤

running to write this because i love it, here’s part one

the judgment day x reader (platonic) , mention of drew mcintyre

‼️finn being a good manipulator lol, family issues, fear of abandonment, angst, reader feeling insecure, brief mention of suicidal thoughts (sorry it’s a little angst)

don’t break my heart - part 2

you lied if you said that you slept the night right after summerslam. no, you were in your hotel room watching the ceiling over and over, thinking of what was going to happen now. damian and rhea made sure to stay with you a few hours after the show, helping you calm down and making sure that you would eat something.

but they were tired and angry, so you perfectly understood when they waved goodbye and went to their rooms. they needed time to think and to cool off.

5 am and you were up to board on your next flight that didn’t leave until noon. you were living off on caffeine and sugar drinks but you didn’t care. you had no idea what was going to happen on monday night raw because you weren’t supposed to have any matches that night, you knew you would go with rhea and damian but you didn’t know what your future was going to be.

once you landed and you checked in into your new hotel room, you received a text from finn, saying to let him know once you arrived at the arena because he wanted to talk to you.

you drove along with rhea and damian and they both sensed your fear as you kept quiet, “you okay there?” damian asked you.

“uh?” you woke up from your trance.

“dam asked if you were okay, is everything okay y/n?” rhea added turning to face you.

“oh yes, i’m okay, just a lil nervous…” you hated lie to them, you hated lie in general but you couldn’t tell them that you were about to meet with finn. they would probably get mad at you and the last thing you wanted was to have your best friends hating on you too, so you kept it for yourself.

damian kept driving, knowing that eventually you would open up to them when you were ready.

once at the arena you waved them goodbye and went straight to your changing room. rhea told you to get ready in case something happened and if she needed your help so you did as she told you.

you texted finn and told him he could come over if he needed to talk to you so bad and not even 10 minutes later you heard a knock on the door.

“come in…” you screamed and he let himself in.

“hey…”

“hi” you couldn’t deny that the situation was awkward. you stood there for a couple of minutes before he could talk.

“listen…y/n i’m so sorry for everything that happened at summerslam” he apologized to you but you knew he wasn’t sorry at all.

“you lied to me finn…”

“and you lied to damian and rhea because i’m pretty sure they don’t know i’m here” he smirked at you and that look made you sick in the stomach.

“are you here to threaten me? are you to destroy the little family i have left? what do you want finn…i have no time for more bullshit, please” your voice sounded broken and finn hated himself for the way he treated you.

“i know…i’m so sorry for everything and you have to believe me…i’m not sorry for damian or for rhea because i got tired of being their little puppy, dominik too…but i have nothing against you, never have, never wil…i care about you y/n…don’t you remember all the things we shared? all the things we’ve went through?”

and you couldn’t lie to him. you will always remember how kind and patient and caring he has always been with you.

he was the first person you told about your past, even before telling damian and rhea. he was the one who held you while you cried when you told him about your thought of ending your life. he was the one who comforted you and made sure you never felt left out. and he was true when he said you’ve been through a lot because he was always there for you.

but so were damian and rhea so you couldn’t understand why was finn telling you all of that.

“why are you here finn?” you simply asked him, his way of bringing back memories made you feel guilty. seeing how much you depended upon someone made you realize that you probably were better alone than with someone.

“i want you to join us…”

“join who?”

“me…y/n, me, dom, jd and liv…listen, i know you and i know damian and rhea and they will leave you at some point…they are both chasing vengeance and power, they want their titles back, they won’t be with you forever and, i’m sorry to say it but they won’t take care about you forever…you saw the way rhea treated dom or the way damian treated jd…” his words were starting to impress in your head “jd kinda likes you” he chuckled “no, i’m pretty sure he has a crush on you…and listen, liv is really a friendly person, i know you don’t like her right now but i promise you, if you get to know her you will like her more…just give us a chance”

maybe he was right.

maybe you would ended up being alone one day and he was right about that damian and rhea had their own lives apart from you. hell, rhea just got married, maybe she would like to start a family one day…maybe finn was right.

finn always cared about you, he proved it many times so why were you afraid of trusting him?

“i-i…i don’t know finn…” your mind started to overthink. you were feeling overwhelmed and despite you still loved finn, despite you still caring for him, you couldn’t betray damian and rhea.

“listen i-…”

“no finn, you listen to me. how can you expect me to choose between you or them? how-how can you tear this family apart like this? because maybe for you it was nothing but for me…for me it was everything…” tears slowly falling down your face.

finn knew that it was wrong putting you in all of this mess. he knew that no matter what he still would have a space for you in his heart but the idea of choosing them instead of him made him feel useless, like somehow he failed you.

“i can’t choose between you or them because you are the ones who broke this group apart…” more tears falling from your eyes “i-i can’t finn…i can’t” and before he could say anything else, you turned to face the door and quickly left your changing room.

drew noticed you walking down the arena corridors with teary eyes and no matter how many time he called you, your mind couldn’t register any sound or noise. it felt like you couldn’t hear anything except your heart beating in your chest.

i just saw y/n crying and going towards the emergency exit of the arena. finn balor just came out of her changing room. don’t know what happened but she seems overwhelmed, she needs you.

drew texted rhea. he was pretty worried when he saw in what state you were in. he knew that even if he chased you, you probably would have just pushed him away. he knew something about your past and he knew how the other females in the roster would give you “the looks” and honestly he felt for you, he just wanted you to feel welcomed because for him, the wwe was just a big huge family. he knew that you needed time, that’s why he warned rhea.

when she read the text, she felt her heart missing a few beats.

“what?” damian asked a little concerned when he saw the look on her face.

she was still a little shocked “drew texted me…he saw finn leaving y/n’s changing room and he said that when she left she was crying…she’s probably going’s back to the hotel, he said she’s going outside”

that was all damian needed to hear before leaving rhea’s changing room and sprinting over the emergency exit. rhea following behind, making a note to thank drew later.

they both saw you sitting on the emergency stairs and slowly they both approached you.

damian sat in front of you while rhea sat next to you “hey angel…” rhea slowly turned your face towards hers “why are you crying beautiful?”

in that moment you saw it in their eyes.

they cared.

they cared like a family.

rhea was about to cry because she couldn’t stand the idea of seeing you upset.

“finn wanted to talk to me…he, well, he basically offered me a spot to join him alongside with dom, jd and liv…” you said. you feared that they would get mad but rhea’s eyes told you the opposite.

“and what did you say?” damian asked you, gently smiling at you.

“that i can’t…i can’t leave you, i can’t even look him in the eyes, it just hurts too much and i can’t have you hate on me too” you softly spoke.

damian looked at you and saw nothing but pure intentions “y/n…we could never hate you. we know how close you and finn are, and i know it hurts right now so we won’t forbid you to see him again if you want to…”

“but i can’t damian! it doesn’t feel right, it’s not right! i’m not turning my back on you, i would never do that…you guys mean so much for me and i can’t stand the idea of losing you or hate you but…but finn said some things that made me think…”

“what did he say sweetheart?” rhea gently asked.

“well, for instance, rhea you just got married…and i can’t hold you back for the rest of my life just because my head is a fucking mess, you have your life and i don’t want you to feel the need to look after me forever…same goes for you damian, i can’t depend on you for the rest of my life…”

“that’s absolute nonsense y/n” damian said and rhea agreed with him. she was mad with finn for playing those mind tricks with you, knowing exactly that your mind wasn’t in the right place and that you would get negative thoughts very easily.

“listen” damian spoke “we are a family okay? we stay together, now, tomorrow and in ten years okay? just because we have a life outside this company doesn’t mean that you’re not a part of our life outside of it okay? we stay together instead and outside…i love you like you are my own sister, fuck you could be my daughter y/n…” damian joked making you laugh.

“damian’s right” rhea held your hands “we stay together because we care about you, now and in a million years…”

“thank you for everything guys…” you smiled at both at them.

“you don’t have to thank us love…” rhea wiped some of your tears away “now, why don’t you help me getting ready uh? tonight’s gonna be a big night and i want to look perfect” she laughed making you laugh too.

“yup” you smiled and with their help you got up from the uncomfortable stairs.

rhea mentally noted to thank drew and to kick finn’s ass because he made you doubt yourself, and most importantly, he made you cry.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

okay so what about part 3 with reader and drew getting to know each other and developing feelings for each other and damian and rhea acting like big parents to reader?

PART 3

[bunnyinvanilla]

bar owner price getting hit on by some woman who’s not reader pleaaaaase 🙏 (fluffy or smutty idk)(both perchance)

thank you for requesting this flower blossom!! I hope to live up to the expectations, its longer than I planned it to be, but enjoy your freshly baked pie!🍰

warnings: sugar daddy price, sugar baby fem!reader, slight sliiiight public play, jealousy, laaarge age gap! price is in his 40s and reader is 21, ringed hand! oopsie!

you were sweet and kind, yes, but oh weren’t you the jealous type.

dammed be that time you’d asked price if you could still ‘help around the bar’ when it got too busy, when you could’ve simply been sitting on his lap, read a book and be his little sugar baby in peace. you rubbed a tablecloth against the already crystal shining bottle of whatever rich liquor bottle were holding, mind and eyes completely elsewhere — the night had started pretty good, John had been busy discussing with his teammates about the next upcoming mission, and you had been dusting off the countertop, all ribboned and dolled up.

but, just as little bunnies could catch the tiniest shift in the environment and put their senses in alert, ears twitching upward, stilling in their tracks, as the night went on, you could feel something, no, someone that didn’t please your inner senses.

you carefully placed the half filled glass on the tray, eyes shifting to where John was sitting. His ringed, left hand held up his usual poison, scotch with no ice, but Simon wasn’t sitting in front of him, nor was Gaz, or Johnny.

no, an older, clearly attractive woman was — everything about her poured an uneasy feeling down your spine, the way she was practically eye-eating john up, not even trying to hide her obvious smirk, shamelessly undressing him with her eyes.

you blinked, dumbfounded, towards her. She was everything you were not, generously gifted curves wise, confident, and conventionally attractive. If you were a bunny, she was a whole panther.

she leaned herself closer, practically squeezing her chest up to him, her lips mouthing something you couldn’t quite catch from here, but John wasn’t looking at her, his eyes were focused down on his glass, the tip of his finger distractingly tracing the circular edge of the glass.

he literally owned the bar, he could simply make her leave and do you a huge favor, right?

you let out a shaky breath, feeling the familiar sensation of warm, burning roots of jealousy creep up your chest and paint your cheeks red. Your throat stung, welcoming in the feeling that almost made you want to stomp your foot on the ground like bunnies did when they were upset and offended.

you angrily picked up the tray, walking down towards the costumer who’d been waiting for his order. He was sitting a few seats away from them, and despite your crippling frustration, you smiled at him softly, placing his drink down.

“could show you a great time, big bear”

you stilled at that luring, seductive voice, your smile faltering when you heard her words. You hated the way it sounded, the way she dared to use a nickname on him. Only you could.

she winked at him, and stood up, her clothes revealing enough to leave little to the imagination. Great, you’d have to ask Johnny to get you some ice cream so could eat it while crying over yourself. You heard her heels clink distantly, towards the back of the bar, down to the bathrooms, and you straightened your back, a flustered, annoyed expression on your usual soft, smiling face.

taking the empty tray back with you, you walked past John, ready to hide yourself behind the counter and brood all night long about what had just happened — your own heels sounded louder than usual, each step trying to ease up some pent up sparks of anger,

“doll” the gruff, deep voice called from behind you, low and heavy. You stopped, still not facing him, halfway past him. You frowned, waiting a few seconds before turning towards him and start walking again,

one, two, three, four steps until you were in front of him. He was looking up at you, eyes always so impossibly intense, you could never tell what he was thinking, always so impassible, self assured and keeping his composure.

that’s when your juvenile immaturity came out. You crossed your arms together, shifting your position imperceptibly, yet little enough that he could see the light tilt of your hip. Now it was his time to stare, his eyes warm like the golden liquid he’d been drinking, taking greedily in every inch of your feminine, short uniform.

“what, sir? do you need an ashtray?” you questioned, your sweet voice tinted with an uncharacteristic sarcasm as you blinked down at him.

oh, he loved seeing you like this. A part of him got off at seeing you all pent up and flustered. His brow perked, the side of his mustache twitching up amusedly — your eyes fell onto his lap when he shifted, parting his legs and shifting his hips upwards, spreading his thighs wide. He brought his free hand down and patted his lap twice, gesturing for you to sit down.

the sight made you flush, your cheeks grew red and your belly twisted with a warm knot, you could feel your panties already growing wet, but you remained resilient for an instant. “I can’t, I’m working”

“you can if I say so” he didn’t leave any room up for questioning, muttering the words out like an order, knowing well enough you always did whatever he told you to — you were his good girl, after all.

you bit the inside of your cheek, and sighed. You were annoyed, jealous, you didn’t care how immature it seemed. You turned around, sitting yourself down into his lap.

his arms quickly crossed around your waist, pushing you closer against him. He drank quietly from his glass, eyes studying your crossed arms, your red cheeks, and pout.

that’s what made bunnies all worked up then…

“easy, pet” John chuckled, warning you so gently with a tone that made you shiver on his lap, his warm breath fanning over your neck, “eyes on you, love,” he murmured, his hand sliding from your waist all the way down your short, tight skirt, resting uninvitedly between your thighs “always.”

he was wolfishly trying to soothe you, trying to mold your mind into reassurance.

”but she doesn’t know it,” you replied, and John almost grinned at how adorably you looked and sounded, always so polite, quiet and sweet, he’d never seen you quite this annoyed.

that woman chose that exact moment to come back from the bathroom, and price could feel your body tense up against his, tense and nervous. She slowed her tracks upon seeing you all curled up on his lap, a glint of realization crossing past her and a frown decorating her face.

“shh, sweetheart,” John murmured gravelly against your ear, but you were a bundle of nerves. He sipped from his glass — eyes narrowing at the woman across the room. He slid his hand further down, slipping right underneath the hem of your skirt, brushing up and down your thigh without going up too high in the public setting.

you held your breath, your cheeks burning a bright red, and turned your head to look down at him. He set his drink down, and with an unexpected movement, he gripped your thigh and pulled you harshly closer to him. “wait, sir-“

“look at me, doll”

you did.

“who gets to have me every day, anytime she wants?” he rasped quietly, his gravel voice making you clench your thighs against his hand. His tone had been clear, he wanted you to answer him. “answer me, sweetheart.”

“i-i do” you blubbered out, arms no longer crossed, but on both sides of his legs.

“who do i take home with me, to my bed, to the back of this bar, every night?” his hand travelled higher, brushing against the hem of your panties, the cold metal of his rings against your clothed clit. You could feel a hardness underneath your lower back, and you blushed at the feeling of his erection pressed against you, almost fighting the urge to grind against it.

“me, sir…” you breathed out, your pent up frustration and jealously slowly being replaced with other feelings.

“who gets daddy like this?” he accentuated his words with a subtle buck of his hips against you, making you swallow back a whine at the feeling of his hardened, clothed length underneath the fabrics of his trousers.

“m-me, sir…”

“good girl, she wants what she cannot have,” he twisted two fingers, pressing the hard material of his rings against your panties, making you trap and bite down on your bottom lip. The thin hem of your skirt covered that act to the outsiders, hiding it from peering eyes. “can stare all she wants, daddy’s all yours, bunny”

with a swift motion, he put his hand underneath your chin, and tilted your head up towards his. “behave f’me, love, ‘aight? no need to be jealous”

you’re still pouting, a shy, annoyed bunny that was just clingy and needy, could you blame her? You nodded and he leaned back on the sofa chair, veiny, hairy hand distractingly caressing your thigh, not venturing too far.

you hadn’t even realized that the woman had left the bar, mind too focused on John’s hands and words, but before you could say something, he tapped your thigh twice. “now, get up and go to my office, need to help daddy fix what you’ve caused”

[on-a-lucky-tide]

Simon wakes with a hangover after a night out and decides he's gonna fuck Price about it. #GhostPriceWeek

Day Three: Blushing/Tea

cw: anal sex, kissing, blowjob, handjob, fingering. Britlish. ( @gomzdrawfr )

Simon slumped on the sofa and flicked the telly on. BBC One, Sunday Morning Live. He'd turn it over to something a bit less bright and breezy but he'd already dropped the clicker and it was a whole five inches from his hand.

The pint of water he'd sunk before collapsing into bed the night before deserved a VC for the futile battle it had fought against the sheer volume of alcohol in his bloodstream. A clean engagement, but in the end the enemy had been too strong. Not even a quick shower had lessened the thrum in his temples and the ache of bad sleep around his eyes.

There was nothing for it. He'd have to order Powerade from Ubereats. Unfortunately, his phone was currently M.I.A.

As Sean Fletcher introduced criminologist and fraud expert Dr Elisabeth Carter to discuss how gullible religious cranks were getting scammed out of their money, Simon heard life shuffle around in the ensuite attached to their bedroom. The bone-deep groan of pain, the sound of furious teeth brushing and running water, followed by the gargling and spit of Listerine against porcelain. Moments later, Price emerged into the living room with his head in his hand.

“Mornin’,” Simon rumbled, head lolling against the backseat of the sofa.

“Unfortunately…” Price replied, squinting in the light streaming through the balcony doors. “Sitrep.”

“‘Angin’ out my fockin’ arse.”

“Rog,” Price mumbled, shuffling over to the kitchenette. He hadn't bothered throwing a shirt on, his flannel pajamas sitting low on his hips, slippers trodden down at the back. “Where did MacTavish learn t’ drink like that…”

“S’national sport up there. Reckon they start ‘em young.” Simon watched Price fill the kettle and pull two mugs from the cupboard: one red, one blue. “I'll text ‘im later an’ tell him we went out for a 10k at 5am.” He slouched over the sofa to grab the remote and turned down the volume on the telly as the fake laughs of the presenters grated right through him.

Price wandered to the fridge after dishing out the tea bags and a generous amount of sugar, and lingered with the door open, milk in hand. “Was the filfy kebab really necessary? Yer fuckin’ insides must be rotten…”

“Don't recall you complainin’ when you were scoffin’ half of it in that bus shelter.”

Simon had offered to purchase two kebabs in the full knowledge that his would be raided the moment he unwrapped it, but Price had declined, because chips and doner meat tasted a hundred times better when it was pilfered from your boyfriend’s pita bread, while he struggled to perch on the tiny fuckin’ bus shelter bench and eat at the same time.

“Tha’ explains why I were breathin’ fire when I woke up.”

Simon heard the clang of the bin as his respectfully wrapped leftover kebab was relegated to landfill. “Brutal.”

“We’ll go out for a fry up down the road when my ‘ead stops spinnin’.” The kettle clicked and Simon heard the slosh of water as Price poured their brews.

“Could order in.”

“Don't be fuckin’ lazy. Fresh air’ll help.” Price carried the two mugs over to the sofa and Simon reached up to take the blue one as it was passed down.

“Yer bloody ‘eartless,” Simon said.

“Fink you'll find ‘m all ‘eart.” Price slumped onto the sofa and leaned into Simon's side, his eyes lidded. Simon took a few cursory sips of tea, his mouth like teflon after years of scoffing overcooked rat packs and over-boiled filter coffee, before placing the mug down on the coaster.

It was difficult to ignore the draw of Price's body when it was pressed so close, even through the haze of a hangover. Simon tilted his head into Price's ruffled hair and breathed him in. Despite spending a night on the lash, he still smelled fuckin’ delicious; faded cologne and deodorant, a sleep-warm musk beneath it all. Simon’s cock twitched with interest, enticed by the smell and heat of his partner, relaxed and half naked against him.

Simon slid his arm around Price's chest, fingers playing in the soft curls of his body hair before he cupped the swell of a tit and squeezed. The give of firm muscle beneath his palm made a lick of arousal curl through his gut, and Simon nuzzled Price’s head over a little to nibble at the shell of his ear.

“Gerroff,” Price huffed, putting up token resistance by nudging his elbow against Simon's ribs, but he didn't pull away. If anything, he reclined a little further over Simon's chest, sipping his tea once more before resting it on the sofa cushion, fingers hooked loosely in the handle.

They'd been too hammered to fuck last night. Sure, there had been some heavy grinding when they'd stumbled through the door, some sloppy, heated snogging, but the moment they had stripped off and fallen into bed, they had passed out in a heap of tangled limbs. A lazy Sunday 'morning after' was the perfect time to make up for it.

Simon stroked Price's happy trail and slipped his hand into the loose waistband of his pajamas without preamble, inviting himself to Price's prick as his eyes wandered back to the telly. His touch was gentle, lazy, caressing the soft length with his fingertips until it began to chub up. He stroked back and forth over the ridge of Price's crown through his foreskin as it slowly drew back, enjoying the muted sighs of enjoyment as much as the velvet softness and warmth against his palm.

“Yer plannin’ t’ do anythin' with that or yer jus’ gonna give me blue balls?”

“Depends, ya gonna drag me into public with a hangover or ya gonna let me order in?”

“You cruel little shit,” Price murmured without heat, lifting his hips to rub his cock against the heel of Simon's palm.

“What’ll it be? Deal or no deal?”

“Noel Edmonds is a fuckin’ turn off…”

“Stephen Mulhern now.”

“That cockney twat ain't much better–fuck, Simon, c’mon, la… do it proper, like.”

“Still waitin’ for the decision.”

“Fine, fine… MaccyD’s kitchen round the corner ain't bad–haa, ah, mmm.”

Simon stroked firmly from base to tip, squeezing on the upwards tug around the glans. Price bucked into his palm, precum wetting the fleece of his pajamas as Simon worked him over. Simon felt his body warm through the cotton of his shirt, and pressed a kiss into his hair as his own cock pushed his shorts into a tent.

“You make me so fuckin ‘ard,” Simon growled into Price's hair. “Jus’ the bloody smell of ya drives me mental.”

“Yeah? Show me, Simon. Show me what ya want…”

Simon trailed his hand down until Price's balls sat in the cradle of his palm and two fingers were teasing the rim of his hole. Price didn't push him away, but spread his legs with a low, wanton moan, his hips rolling up to grind the wet head of his cock against Simon's wrist.

A slow Sunday morning fuck now well and truly on the cards, Simon needed to prep. He pulled his hand away reluctantly and leaned over to grope through the clutter in the drawer of the lamp table. They had fucked on this sofa so often that Price had dumped a tube of durex water-based amongst the allen keys and miscellaneous house debris.

When Simon slumped back with his prize in hand, Price had rolled onto his front and was shoving at Simon's shorts with an impatient growl. Simon lifted his arse magnanimously, his hard cock flopping free against his thighs as Price pushed his waistband past his knees, pressing his nose against Simon's shaft. “Heard receivin’ a blowie after the giver’s drunk tea feels good,” Price said, licking a thick vein bulging from ruddy, hard flesh.

“Fancy testin’ that?”

Price smirked and leaned to the side just enough to knock back the rest of his brew before he returned to Simon's cock. He gripped the base, drawing the tip of his tongue through Simon's slit to savour the first beads of precum, before swallowing him down with a deep, longing moan.

“Oh, fuck…” Simon lifted his hips into the tingling heat of Price's mouth, his head falling back with the rush of pleasure through his hips and up his spine. Yeah, there was mileage in the tea thing. His hand pushed into that soft, ruffled hair only for an anchor as Price hollowed his cheeks and swirled his tongue, head bobbing slowly as he drooled and moaned around Simon's cock, his mouth stretched almost beyond capacity.

If someone had said a few years ago that Captain John Price was a champion cocksucker, Simon would have knocked them the fuck out for the slur. Now he knew it would have been an accurate evaluation of his skillset. The fuckin’ mouth on him. And with the added flush of the tea, Simon's bare toes curled against the floor in pure ecstasy.

When the initial shock eased into a more constant swell of pleasure and Simon's stomach unbunched, Simon could concentrate enough to slick his fingers and slip them between Price's arse cheeks. He circled his rim in firm, smooth passes, teasing him into relaxing. He felt the sweet vibration of Price's moan as he slid his first finger in, Price’s legs spreading until one knee dropped off the edge of the sofa, back curved to give Simon better access once he'd wriggled out of his flannel trousers.

Simon tilted his head back and closed his eyes, luxuriating in the filthy, wet sounds of saliva and lube, the suction of Price's clever mouth punctuated by the rumbles of guttural moans as he was fingered open, the weathered hand that cupped and tugged Simon's sac was warm and firm, enjoying the promising heft that would soon empty deep inside him.

There was another reason other than convenience that Simon enjoyed fucking Price here. It was the living room mirror on the opposite wall. Tall and narrow, intended for a last minute check of teeth and hair before they stepped out the door. Maybe Simon had purposefully hung it at the perfect angle to reflect their athletics on the sofa, but if he had, that was between him and god.

Either way, since it's arrival he'd got to watch Price's back flex, sheened with sweat, as he ground himself down on Simon's cock, and watched his face as he was fucked from behind over the coffee table, even admired himself working on top as he'd pushed Price’s head down and pounded into him until he'd come screaming and begging, muffled by the sofa cushions. There was something about the sight of them together, of Price taking his cock and loving every second, that set Simon on fire.

“C’mon, up ‘ere.” Simon tugged at Price’s chin until he pulled off his cock with a soft pop. “Reverse, lean back.”

“Givin’ orders now…”

Simon smirked, holding Price’s hips to help him balance as he straddled Simon's lap, dropping one hand to smear a little lube on his cock and grip it at the base to hold it steady. He got to watch as Price’s body swallowed him, slick hole stretching wide to take every fuckin’ inch until Price was seated almost to the hilt. Simon's hands slid over his hips and pulled him down into his first thrust, forcing a choked noise from Price’s throat. Simon pressed a kiss in the middle of Price's freckled back and murmured into his skin. “Oh, fuck yeah, you're so fuckin’ ready for me, you wan’ed this so bad, didn'tcha?”

“Yeah, Simon… oh, oh, mm, yeah, your fuckin cock…”

“C’mere.” Simon pulled Price’s back against his chest and tilted his chin for a deep, wet kiss, their tongues working over each other as Simon slid his hands beneath Price’s thighs to lift them up and apart, forcing Price to relax back and let himself be fucked. Simon dragged his cock in and out slowly, savouring the long, drawn out pleasure of each thrust, always leaving the tip inside and sinking in almost to the base.

Price moaned and gasped, trying to hold the kiss at first, but soon having to flop his head back as Simon began to thrust faster. At this angle, with the wicked curve in Simon's cock, he was dragging over Price's prostate with every roll of his hips.

“Haa, ah, Simon, yeah, yeah, fuck, yeah, so fuckin’ good.”

Simon could just about see over Price’s shoulder in this position, those few inches of height in the torso coming up trumps in providing the perfect view of the most beautiful fuckin’ sight in the world; John Price being split open on his fat dick. His muscular thighs spread wide, secured by Simon's hands into yielding, his hole sucking greedily at Simon's cock, his face, neck and chest blushing and his cock flopping and drooling against his belly.

“Look at ya, look--ahh, look at yaself in the mirror, John… mm, fuck, look ya takin me.”

Price did look and Simon got to watch those blue eyes widen as he saw his own pretty little hole swallowing Simon's thick cock, watch it bully him open with each thrust and leave him empty every time it drew back. Price moaned, low and broken, one arm curled behind Simon's head while the other sloped down his body so he could jerk his own prick in rough, messy tugs.

“Gonna come--fuck, nn--so deep in ya, John… want me leakin’ out of ya for days.”

”Simon!”

“Feelin’ me inside ya, ahh, as you bark orders.”

“Haa, ah, fuck, fuck!’

Even with the distant echo of his hangover, the pleasure of fucking into the snug heat of Price’s body and listening to him fall apart was overwhelming. Simon sunk a little lower to brace his elbows for a harder fuck, and felt the throb of Price’s climax in the clench and flutter of his arse. Price arched, his legs pushing out against Simon's hands, testing his strength, as he continued his relentless pace even as Price painted his own belly with milky white.

The wrecked sounds each thrust forced from Price's overstimulated body were enough for Simon to follow him over the edge. Two big hands slanted over his hips to pull him down and Simon thrust up, coming as deep as he could. Price moaned, leaning forward a little so his thighs could spread side over Simon's lap. “Oh, fuck, Simon, tha’s fuckin ‘ot… ya filthy git.”

Simon knew Price loved being fucked full; the spread of warmth as Simon's balls emptied inside him, the way he'd feel it leak out of his stretched hole when Simon pulled out, evidence he'd been thoroughly bred.

Simon ground up, biting his lower lip as his thumbs pushed into the muscle of Price’s arse. He didn't want to pull out. He wanted to stay in what was his forever, but as the euphoria abated and his cock softened, he decided he'd rather spoon his fucked out partner and order a fuckin' Big Mac. Gently, he eased Price off, snagging some Kleenex from the coffee table to clean up before he half draped himself over Price's back.

They cuddled in the afterglow, too big to spoon on the sofa really, Price's leg hanging off and Simon's knuckles dragging on the floor, but both were too interested in exchanging lazy kisses to care. At some point, Simon found his phone and punched in their order and Price began to doze.

Once they'd eaten, Simon would decide just how many times he was going to make Price come before they had to turn in for work on Monday. Double figures seemed a reasonable goal.

[phasecornnuts]

Hiiiiiiii! If you’re still open for requests maybe you might wanna write something where the reader casually mentioned that they/she had a partner on earth before they died and Alastor takes it a bit too drastically and has just been very salty and asking too many questions 😭 if you like that

Please & thanks ❤️

Hey guys I've returned! Sorry for taking a little while, I was busy with finals/I wanted to relax on my spring break so I didn't have a lot of time. I lowkey kind of cooked with this one too so enjoy :3

Also, I sorta made the reader be from around the same time period as Alastor (sorta late 1910s early 1930s) for extra spice

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It had become a daily routine for you and Alastor to have afternoon tea together in cannibal town. Always, between the hours and four and six o’ clock after Alastor had finished his broadcast and you, your hotel duties, the both of you would walk down to Rosie’s Emporium to nibble on finger sandwiches, candied eyeballs, and other treats. 

The sun was still high in the sky, sending fingers of light through the windows of the cafe; the building was alive with the chatter of demons and hell-born alike. You and Alastor had just sat down, a short cannibal girl with a heart-shaped face and glowing brown ringlets placing your usuals on the table. Oh how beautiful they were! Too pretty to eat, garnished with tiny sprigs of mint (or, at least, it may have been mint) and resting on plates of delicate porcelain. With polished silver beside them, and matching teacups and saucers too, it all looked like a party for a girl’s favorite doll.

That is, if it weren’t human meat. 

Looking up from your plate, you saw Alastor turn his head to follow the cannibal girl making you frown. His gaze returned to you before he caught you staring, a chipper grin on his face as always.

“She could be a dead ringer for Mary Pickford, don’t you think?”

Your eyebrows perked. You hadn’t looked long at the girl admittedly, though you stared long enough to know that she was no Pickford. You pursed your lips,

“I don’t see it, Lillian Gish maybe.”

He looked at you like a mad-woman, “You don’t!?”

“No! Her eyes are much too large!”

Alastor chuffed, proceeding to rest his chin on his dark hand, “In the eye of the beholder I suppose.” 

You rolled your eyes, “You only say that because of her curls,” you stated while picking up the teapot and pouring yourself and Alastor your cups, “Now, drink before it gets cold.”

For much of your lunch neither of you spoke, merely enjoying each other’s presence while pecking on some food here and there. Throughout the meal the waitress brought more plates, pancreas tarts, minced tongues coated with cinnamon sugar, and sweet pies filled with rotted venison and cooked kidneys, all Rosie’s treat. Alastor had been taken by the small pies in their mulled deliciousness, the meat so tender you saw his eyes water. He pleaded you to try one, though you couldn’t, your stomach filled to the brim from the other treats and delicacies. 

Alastor picked up the small pair of silver tongs from beside him and placed two sugar cubes in his tea, “I do say, it’s nice to have a meal companion again.” He took a sip from his teacup and grinned. 

You nodded in agreement, lifting the milk jug from the table and pouring a generous amount into your cup. “Likewise. Good dinner conversation is a horrid thing to lose.”

“Truly.” He took another drink. “Before you, I hadn’t had a proper luncheon since my mother.”

“From what you tell she sounded like a fine woman.” His grin lost its eeriness, becoming fond instead. 

“She truly was, and such a fine cook too.” Alastor gazed at the fine pattern painted on the rim of his saucer, “her jambalaya was the best, our side of the Mississippi” he chuckled. He began to remember then, “And her gumbo and her crawfish etouffee and her pecan pralines”

It was odd to hear his voice so full of affection, but nice too. So strange, to think a man who broadcasted his murders of other overlords and feasted on their flesh was once a little boy who clung to his mothers skirt and happily ate her cooking. 

“Maybe one day you’ll cook for me then?” you teased

“Oh why wouldn’t I for my favoritest of sinners?” He took your hand.

You leaned in towards him, a silent flirtation. “Or perhaps I could prepare something for you?”

He looked at you from his dark, hooded eyes, a certain intrigue radiating from them. “Would you now?” he said, leaning in closer. 

“Oh I would, anything you’d like.” the tip of your oxford lingering at his ankle. “My food was good enough for my darling back on earth, why would an overlord of hell have any complaints? Other than not enough seasoning I suppose.” 

That was when the laughter in his eyes died. Alastor bit the inside of his cheek before finding the words to speak, “Your darling?”

 “Pardon?”

“You had someone,” He straightened up, pulling himself away from you, “back on earth?”

“I hardly see how it matters now.” 

Alastor’s tone grew curt, had such a simple word bruised his ego? 

He crossed his arms, “What were they like?” each word as sharp as his teeth.

You pulled your hands close to you, confused at his curtness, “They were….they were nice. Cordial, spirited, vivacious, however you would put it. If you’re-” Alastor cut you off. 

“How did you meet them?”

“On the trolley.” That only served to make him scoff.

“Tch, how common. The trolley.”

You chewed your bottom lip, trying to deny the anger towards him that began to knot in your belly. “It was a different lifetime.” You asserted, a hard finality to it. Pushing yourself from the small table you smoothed your skirt and adjusted the ribbon that was tied so nicely in your hair. 

Without looking at him you said, “Tell Rosie I’m grateful for her hospitality and I will try to find a way to repay her. Also that I’m sorry that I had to retire without saying hello but I feel rather…faint.” Before leaving completely you said, “See you back at the hotel.”

The rest of the day you hid in your room, sulking and pacing. Charlie had tried to coax you out, seeing how angry you’d been when you came back, but you denied every effort she had. 

“It’s not good to stay cooped up in there,” the Princess pleaded.

“I like my alone time.”

 “But- but I had games planned! Husk was going to show us how to play Blackjack and Dominoes!”

“I prefer bridge, and he’ll just cheat us anyways.”

She gave a disappointed sigh, and outside the door you could hear Vaggie talking to her, telling Charlie to give you your space. 

For three nights straight you avoided Alastor, finishing up your hotel duties quickly before hiding in your room. You grew bored after the first day admittedly, a person could only sleep and bathe and read so much. The fourth night is when he knocked on your door while you lied draped on your couch, your nose in a book you’d already finished before. Thinking it was Charlie, you ignored it, sure she’d get the message. It insisted however, rapping harder the second time. You sighed, annoyed. “Who is it?”

“Alastor, may I come in?”

A sour taste came in your mouth, “No.”

“You cannot lock yourself away from me forever.” 

You lifted yourself off the couch, full of bitterness, “I can and I will!”

An electric hum filled your ears, the sound of Alastor weighing his words, “Could you at least entertain my attempt?”

Walking to the door and opening it slightly you saw his face, those deep, hooded eyes dark as blood, cracked lips, and hollow cheekbones. All of those beautiful, haunting features draped in remorse. You sighed, cursing the affection you had for him. 

“Fine, but I’m still cross with you.” That made him smile, if only a tad. 

Opening the door fully, you saw he’d brought one of the dining carts from the unused kitchen clad in a clean white sheet. Alastor pushed it to the center of the room before spiritedly ripping the cover from the cart, presenting polished silver dishes of raw meat and organs. From the bottom shelf of it, he had pulled a fine bottle of wine and two shining glasses.

“I helped myself to a bottle of Husk’s finest, the patrons here don’t have as refined tastes as you and I.” He gave a small grin. So this is what he brought with him, a peace offering. Your stomach was empty from only eating a small meal earlier in the day, so perhaps it was not in vain, though you weren’t sure if you were ready to forgive him. 

“I’ll help you set the table,” you offered, feeling guilty he put so much effort into pleasing you. 

Alastor held his hands up, “No need darling.” He put his hand on his throat, “What I said the other day was very…” he coughed into his hand, “ungentlemanly of me, and I wanted to make it up to you.” 

You folded your hands and held them to your chest, looking at the embarrassment he tried to hide. Closing your eyes, you took a deep breath, and raised your gaze to his. “Thank you, Alastor.” His grin widened as he sat down beside you. 

He uncorked the bottle of wine, beginning to pour it into the glasses, “Of course.” He handed you the glass which you took gladly. The vintage was so dark it looked black, reflecting the lights that glowed from the ceiling. Swishing it, you could see the hidden shades of red that the wine hid.

“Demon’s blood, Husk calls it.” Alastor told you before he took a long sip. 

“Fitting. Do you know how long he’s aged it?” Alastor shrugged, taking another swallow. 

“I didn’t care to ask, but it tastes so good going down. Come, drink, I didn’t bring this up so I could get drunk by myself.” That made you giggle, how much he valued the both of you eating and drinking together. 

Taking his lead, you titled your head back, savoring the warm burn of the wine going down. Its hot fingers lingered in your chest before fading, like drinking cold medicine. In three large gulps you finished your glass, noticing the way Alastor’s eyes watched your throat as you drank. After finishing your second glass you began to dig into the food he’d brought, pancreas tarts, cooked kidneys and…oh good god! On the largest plate was a raw heart, fresh and bloody. 

“Where did you get this? You shouldn’t have!” Your eyes went wide and your mouth began to salivate. A raw heart! Oh and it was human too! Such a fine delicacy must have taken so much begging from Alastor!

“Rosie owed me a favor. And I owe it to you, for making such a jackass of myself.” 

You took another sip of your wine, feeling your face begin to flush. You helped yourself to a tart while Alastor poured himself another glass. As you ate you felt his eyes on you again, focusing on the way your teeth bit into the pastry, your swan’s neck showing your swallow, and how your tongue dragged across your lips. Feeling bold, you placed your feet in his lap and wiped the corner of your mouth with your finger, licking the tip of it with your tongue. He swallowed, hard, his eyes growing wide. 

“Are you looking at something?” Your voice a heavy seduction.

“Possibly.” He drank again. Leaning back on the arm of the couch, he placed his glass on the floor. The tips of his fingers grazed your legs, “Though I do have another question for you, if I may.”

A sultry smirk grew on your face, “That depends on what it is, Al.” God, you could see the glint in his eyes then.

Alastor looked up at you from his hooded eyes, “I’ve been wondering…about your “darling.” You arched an eyebrow; your interest piqued. “Did they ever have…you?” His breath shuddered. 

“Have me, how?” You teased.

“Oh humor me my dear,” He purred

You smirked and shifted your legs in his lap. “Hmm, maybe once or twice…” You sit up from your recline and crawl onto his lap.

“What sorts of things did they do to you?” 

Running your fingers down his chest you savored the way he squirmed and shifted, “All sorts of unholy things” 

Alastor choked on his breath, his eyes transfixed on your face. Slowly, he caught it, regaining a certain boldness afterwards. His hand found the top of your stocking, fingering the nylon taut to your thighs. “Getting rather comfortable aren’t we my dear?”

The smirk you had deepened and you pulled in closer, feeling the heat of his breath tickle your cheeks. You looked into his eyes, “I could get much more comfortable if you like, Al.” For what seemed like ages you lingered, until you felt you had tortured the man enough. Slowly, you leaned in, seemingly ready to kiss his shiny red lips. Grinning, you pulled a piece of dry skin from his bottom lip between your teeth, peeling it to show the bleeding flesh beneath. 

You sat back on his lap and spat out the skin. Looking at him, you saw that hunger in his eyes again. That fine line of decorum the two of you had with one another, ignoring the lingering gazes and longing touches, all thrown away with one bite. Underneath, you could feel his arousal beginning to grow hard. You rolled your hips slightly into him, earning a throaty groan from Alastor. From the silver dining cart you pulled the piece de resistance, that raw bleeding heart, and sunk your teeth into it, tasting the sweet flavor of iron. Trails of blood dripped from your mouth onto your decolletage, slowly turning brown and flaky.

Alastor’s breath heaved, growing even harder from that sultry cannibalistic display. He pulled you towards him and pressed your mouth to his, saccharine saliva mixing with sanguine. His tongue slid and twisted about yours, savoring every inch of its taste. You pulled away from him to catch your breath, making him whine. Leaning in again, he dragged his tongue along your neck, cleaning up the drying strings of blood. 

Both of you straightened up then, him holding you proper now. One hand ran its fingers through his shiny red hair and the other cupped his aching sex, so taut against his trousers. 

“Is that what you were so upset about Al? If they fucked me or not?” You purred into his ear.

The tips of your fingers fluttered over his hip, tracing its edge before returning to his cock. “I bet you wondered if I did this to them, didn’t you?” A small nip was placed on his neck, leaving a red half-moon. Your breath grew hot against his cheek as you whispered into his ear again, 

“Maybe I did, and maybe I did so many more dirty things to them.” 

Alastor enraptured your mouth in another needy kiss. His words heavy with radio static, “What sort of things my dear? Or are you all talk?” Your grin widened seeing the shock in his eyes when you began to unbutton his overcoat.

“Let me show you.”

Four little words was all it took to send him over the edge. Picking you up, his hands traced over all the parts of your succulent body. When he flopped you on the bed, hair as tousled as a pin-up, you reached out a stockinged leg to him, that devious look on your face growing. Oh how badly he wanted to have you, hastily unzipping your dress as you stripped him down to his undershirt and trousers. Deft fingers hooked around the tops of your stockings, pulling them down as fast as they could. You dropped his trousers and took off his shirt, admiring all of that soft, gray skin.

You pressed your mouth to the flesh of his stomach, blessing it with small love-bites that made him shudder. All along his torso you left red patches and traced your cool fingertips along the hard edges where his ribs poked out. You tilted your head up and moved his hands to the straps of your brasserie, exposing all of your hot, yearning flesh. He cupped a breast and lied on top of you. Grinding his sex to yours he moaned into your mouth. It had been so…so long since you’d been wanted, since someone pressed their body to yours and you felt all of their heat as they slid into you, over and over again. 

“Al,” You breathed

“What is it?”

“Get on your back.” 

And so he did. 

Alastor’s back against the mattress and your palms against his chest, you let him enter you. He let out a string of curses when you did, and even more when you started moving in those easy rolling motions. Those large hands of his held the curve of your waist as you rode him, his eyes half-lidded as he watched your breasts bounce. 

“The first time I saw you…” You began, going a little faster, “I wanted you,” You heard a small thud as he dropped his head against the pillows.

“I thought about you kissing me and touching me all over” That’s when the pulses of pleasure started to build up, prickling you in sweet needles that went all the way up your spine.

“And about you sticking your fingers in me and..and your tongue too” You felt your face heat up and your sex grow slicker, admitting those indecent thoughts you only entertained during late nights when your fingers wandered. Alastor gripped your waist tighter, making your rhythm harsher. You looked down on him, his eyes glazed over with euphoria, and felt your mouth pool with saliva.

Digging your nails into the skin of his chest you kept on. “For a whole week I couldn’t keep from slipping my hands between my legs.” Your voice, thick and hoarse. “I wanted to know what you tasted like, if-if your mouth tasted like blood,” that was when he quickened the pace even more. Your sex was so hot and wet, all the way at the base of your spine you could feel your orgasm coming to you, a full-body shiver that made your eyes well with tears. 

The last part was what sent him over the edge though. 

“Sometimes, I’d bite myself so I could taste the blood when I’d touch-” was all it took to make him come. 

Fuck it felt good too. A weak falsetto escaped your mouth when he released, so warm and filling. That’s what made you reach your end too. You clawed your nails in his skin so deep there were two broken half-moons on his chest. Your thighs clenched against his torso, quivering, as you could feel your body become as light and floaty as chiffon. 

Alastor let the both of you ride it out, that sweet joyous bliss. When your mind returned from the heaven it was sent to, you leaned over, resting on top of him. He moved you gently, pressing you closely to his chest. For a while, neither of you spoke, the air lingering with the smell of sweat and blood and sex. You ran your fingers through his hair again; He kissed the back of your hand before speaking. 

“If I’d known all that would come out of making you angry at me, I would’ve earned your ire a long while ago.” You rolled your eyes, flicking his chest playfully. 

“Perhaps we could do this again, without the arguing?” You propose, “You’re quite good at it.” 

A smile stretched across his face as he played with a lock of hair that rested near your face, “Expect nothing less from an overlord of hell cher.” One of his hands slid to your lower back, tracing small circles on that creamy flesh. 

“How about we try one more time without the arguing, for good measure?”

You smirked and kissed him again. All for good measure.

[satorusugurugurl]

Hi, congrats on 2k followers! Can you do the margaritas prompt with Nanami for your event?

Spicy Margarita!

Summary: Marie’s Summer Fest prompt: margaritas

Pairing: Nanami Kento x AFAB!Reader

Warnings: alcohol consumption, buzzed sex, both parties are consenting, unprotected, sex, couch, sex, rough sex

Word Count: 1,776

A/N: thank you Nonnie!! A few of my mutuals know that I have a weakness for spicy margaritas or margaritas in general! I have been known to order commissions from time to time after consuming many margaritas on Friday nights! So this one came naturally to me!

One of the many things you loved about your husband was the fact that he was a foodie. Both of you enjoyed going out and having dinner, trying new restaurants, foods, and drinks. Especially when you were together on the weekends. While eating at a new Mexican restaurant one weekend, you found your favorite alcoholic beverage—a spicy mango margarita with Chamoy and tajin sugar-salt rim.

The drink was the perfect combination of salty, spicy, and sweet. If you could dive into the sweet, fruity frozen cocktail and swim in it, you would. It was your all-time favorite in the entire world.

It was until the restaurant shut down because the owner moved back to Mexico. That was truly a sad day when you and Nana saw the building was empty on a Saturday night. You cried over losing your favorite fruity cocktail but tried to find the next best one you could. Your journey was very disappointing because every restaurant you ate at didn't come close to making a tasty margarita. The drinks you had tasted were either too expensive or were just mediocre. Eventually, your poor heart couldn’t take the mourning any longer of trying to find the next best margarita out there. So you found yourself opting for the next best thing: Korean plum wine.

Soon, the memory of that tasty margarita would become nothing more than a memory. A fond one that was full of laughter and smiles. Until you came home from work on a hot summer day, only to be greeted by the sound of a blender entering the kitchen instead of your husband's soothing voice. Following the sound, you sauntered into the kitchen, freezing in your tracks as you stared at the blender's bright orange, frozen concoction. Your husband was rimming a glass and sticky red mix before rubbing it on a plate full of sugar.

“Ken?” upon hearing your voice, your husband turned to smile, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose.

“Welcome home, Love.” you watched as Nanami poured the contents of the blender into one of the rimmed glasses. “Here you go. Thank you for your hard work this week.”

Your mouth began to water as you brought the glass up to your mouth. After taking a long sip, the second spicy liquid hit your tongue. Your eyes snapped wide open. Your Margarita! Your sweet husband somehow managed to make your favorite drink. The sound of your happy moans leaving your mouth was music to your husband‘s ears.

“Kento! This is delicious!” you took another sip, eyes rolling back into your skull at the sweetness that envelops your taste buds. “How did you even manage to make it this perfect?”

“Trial and error.” emotions to a few other glasses on the counter. “I made these on the rocks to taste test until I perfected it. I blended it all once I knew I had the right measurements of everything.”

Along the counter were six glasses half full of orange liquid. You placed your frozen margarita down before trying one of the other drinks. The ice clinked in the glass as you brought your mouth tasting it. It was just as good as the frozen one he had handed you! You could tell there was something different about it; though this one had less spicy tequila, but it was still mouth-watering good!

“Mmm, it's so good, Ken!” Nanami took one of the five remaining cups and downed its liquids, humming at the delicious taste with less mango puree.

“Yes, you’re right, it is good.”

Not wanting to waste a single drop of the tasty drinks, you and your husband downed his six experiments before taking on the pitcher next. It was safe to say both of you were pretty buzzed when the last drops of the margarita were gone. And as the liquid seemed to warm your blood, you had an undying need to have your husband inside of you.

The thing about tequila was that it never left you feeling hungover, but it made you insanely horny.

So it was no surprise to your husband when you pulled your clothes off. The tequila left a certain glowly hue around your husband, fueling your hungry desire. Nanami was feeling the same. A warm, tingly sensation ran down his back as he leaned back against the couch, watching your eyes play with lust as you began hugging his sweats down. His hand gently reached around the back of your head, stroking your hair softly as you straddled his hips.

“I want you.”

“You do?”

“Mhmm~!”

Your tequila-laced breath moved in with his own, the smell of alcohol flooding your senses as Nanami gently gripped your hips with both his hands.

“Good, I need you too.” Nanami’s lips pressed against yours as he began bucking his hips up against you, needing to do nothing more than bury himself inside of you.

Which was how you found yourself in your current position, pressed into the couch cushions as you are back into you from behind. You cried out whimpers, leaving your mouth as the pillows muffled some of your sounds while you rocked shamelessly back against your husband’s cock. Nanami grunted, tilting his head back as he lost himself in the way that your pussy squeezed him.

His hand slapped firmly against your ass, massaging it roughly. “Fuck you're so damn tight!” he gripped the fat of your ass, forcing you to fuck yourself back against him harder.

“K-Ke—Kento!” you breathlessly whimpered, looking back over your shoulder at the crazed look in his eyes as he focused on the site of his dick disappearing inside of you. With your ass against him, his cock began to shimmer with your wet sticky arousal. “Nngh!”

He slammed the head of his cock firmly against your cervix, making your eyes roll back as your head fell forward, face buried in the cushions. Your sweet moans were muffled until Nanami wrapped his hand around your hair as if you were his tie and lifted your head out of the cushions. Those sweet little cries that left your mouth filled the living room, bouncing off the walls from how loud you were.

“Don’t you even think about holding back those sounds. I want to hear you.” He tugged your hair tighter, lifting your head higher. From the grip he had on your head, your back arched deeper, sticking your ass up higher, forcing his cock deeper inside of you. “Nngh fuck—mmph— yes, that’s my good girl taking my cock like a good little slut.”

“Haaah! Ah~ ah~ fuck! Fuuuck Kento!”

The couch creaked under your weight as Nanani began thrusting harder into you, slamming his hips so hard against your own that your ass rippled under the force. You were filled to the ultimate brim, his tip kissing your cervix, pressing deeper into you. You could feel him in your womb, leaving you crying, tears streaming down your cheeks from the oversensitivity as pure white hot pleasure rushing through your veins.

“Mmm~ that’s right, that’s my good little slut, crying over how good she feels.” Nanami kissed your shoulder blades before forcing your head back into a throw pillow. “Now be a good little cum slut, and squirt all over my cock.”

The slow lazy thrusts were completely halted as Nanami pulled all the way out, his tip catching on the ring of your tight entrance before he set a brutal fucking pace. He slammed into you and made you cry into the pillow, tears staining it, proof of how good and sensitive you felt things, thanks to the alcohol in your system.

But it wasn’t just the tequila that made you feel like this. It was the unfiltered love that you had for the man who was making you feel so good. He went above and beyond, making your favorite drink. Something that you had pretty much given up on our tasting again. But your husband had done the impossible. He had spent time, effort, and resources concocting that perfect drink to make you happy.

So, of course, you were crying tears of joy as Nanami fucked you so good. Consistently proving that he was the man you wanted to spend your entire life with. It only took three of that deep hard thrust, where his head rubbed and brushed against your g-spot perfectly before ramming into your cervix with a force that left you reeling as you came hard, squirting all over his cock all over the sofa, making a mess.

Your husband didn’t take long to follow you over the edge, hands gripping your hips and his large hands holding steady as he filled your cunt with his seed. The sensation of the spurts of hot white sticky cum filling you made you moan in pure pleasure as you let out muffled cries of your husband’s name into the pillow beneath you. Once Nanami’s cock stopped throbbing. He gently pulled it out of you, helping you sit back against him as his cum began leaking out of your pussy.

His lips gently pressed against your cheek as he ran his hand back over your head, pushing your hair out of your face. You turned slightly towards him, pressing your lips against his, and just as he began to smile at you, you started rocking your hips slowly against him, his face twisting up with pleasure and fear as you moved so fast he barely saw you. One second he was sitting up, holding you in his arms, and the next, he was forced down on the couch while you straddled his hips, hovering over his cock, while your combined cum drilled all over his crotch.

At that moment when he swears he could see a hearts in your pupils. He suddenly remembers the second reason behind your undying love of those spicy margaritas. Not only did it make you horny, but it fueled your already high sex drive. Swallowing hard Nanami watched as you lined his cock up with your pussy. He was in for a very long night. Not that he was complaining about it.

Forever Tag List:

@darkstarlight82 @pandoness @nealeart @simp-plague @sugurubabe @chilichopsticks @reap3erslov3

Summer Fest Tag List:

@typicalife-101

[tooth-butter]

if you could give any f@sting tips that would be nice 🥹 or maybe tips on restricting

Firstly, I’d recommend that you don’t fast at all if you just end up binging afterwards, as that entirely defeats the purpose. Then some harm reduction while fasting that I always recommend; ㅤ♡ drink lots of water, especially sparkling water. Sparkling water fills you up with the carbonation and you won’t feel hungry at all ㅤ♡ if you’re not doing a water fast, diet soda, black coffee and tea are all great drinks for variety while still maintaining your fast, and they’ll fill you up so you’re not tempted to eat something ㅤ♡ paracetamol for your fast headaches are a must. Fast headaches are no joke and you will regret not taking some ㅤ♡ sugar free mints or gum are a lifesaver. Once you’re in ketosis, your breath will STINK. Having mints or gum will mean that nobody will notice ㅤ♡ vitamins are ESSENTIAL. You will end up with some nasty deficiencies if you don’t take them, and you can end up with your hair falling out and all of the stereotypical 4n4 traits like thin hair ㅤ♡ keep yourself busy, you won’t even be able to think of eating if you’re busy enough. I’d recommend doing schoolwork, cleaning your room, painting your nails, picking up a hobby, or even just scrolling and looking at some sp0 to keep yourself motivated ㅤ♡ if you ever get hungry, watch videos of anything that grosses you out. You’ll lose any appetite that you might’ve had, and it’s far easier to stay motivated ㅤ♡ sleep!! It’s essential that you get at least 6-7 hours of sleep a night, if not more. That way not only do you get to spend longer not eating, but your metabolism slows down if you don’t sleep enough, so not sleeping can really hinder your progress ㅤ now just general restriction; ㅤ♡ don’t have an insanely low calorie limit if you just end up binging afterwards. Even a high restriction like 1000 a day is still 500-1000 under maintenance for the vast majority of people, and if you’re consistent with a high restriction, you’ll be much more successful than someone who has a 200 cal limit but binges every three days ㅤ♡ chug water after every bite of food, eat tiny bites, and chew your food for as long as humanly possible before swallowing. You’ll trick your brain into thinking that you ate more and then you’ll end up fuller ㅤ♡ just like with fasts, sleep and take your vitamins, it’s always useful ㅤㅤ♡ if you surpass your restriction, don’t give up! Just ensure that you exercise and burn off those calories. Better to end up with the same net despite eating more than with a binge and the feeling of regret ㅤ♡ Exercise a lot! This is good even when not restricting, but I find that if you get used to exercising on an empty stomach, you’ll not want to eat before exercising, cutting down the window in which you can eat I hope that these helped!!

[drowning-rat37]

☆ Mia/pvr9ing harm reduction and after care ☆

☆ps.- this is not tips on “how to do it better”, this is tips on how to not hurt your body too much while doing it. I am in no way suggesting anyone starts doing it, i am just saying if you are already doing it, try to stay safe❤️❤️❤️

☆anti-acids: if you’re planning to pvr9e, take a couple before you eat, it’ll reduce the acidity of your stomach acid, which in turn reduces the level of enamel loss and tooth decay as well as reducing the trauma on your oesophagus from the acid

☆short nails: if you use your fingers, keep your nails short to prevent scratching/cvtting your throat. Having short nails is also more hygienic as (even if you keep your nails clean) the underside of your nails can carry a lot of bacteria, (this is mainly found in children but has been known in adults) can carry types of worms under the nails. If you have long nails or false nails i recommend going on the utensil route

☆hand sanitizers or antibacterial soap: if you’re adamant that you don’t want to cut your nails short, clean under your nails thoroughly with hand sanitizer and wash ALL OF YOUR HANDS with antibacterial soap to avoid getting ill. Another thing to address about getting ill: you may think “if i get ill/sick then I won’t eat as much” or “i’ll be throwing up so no need for pvr9ing” in theory, great. In reality, it feels awful. I used to think that sort of way and then ever time i got ill i would feel like actual death, just stay clean and hygienic please🙏🙏🙏

☆water: after pvr9ing your body gets extremely dehydrated, make sure to drink enough water, also I recommend alkali water to reduce acid reflux. Take small sips every couple of minutes as to not make yourself feel more nauseous than you probably already are!!!

☆electrolytes: if possible, get yourself a drink with electrolytes or you can also get sachets that are sugar free and put that in water. In another post (i think i tagged it as an update post to a different post i have put a picture of some electrolyte water i bought, i really like that brand)

☆warnings: bl00d, feeling like you’re about to pass out, legs shaking, hands shaking. If you see any of those signs, take a break or stop all together, I’ll get into each signs in detail in a second.

☆utensils: if you’re not using your fingers, keep your utensils clean, weather its a toothbrush or cutlery or something different. Also please use something you know you can easily hold onto to prevent choking on it or letting go of it. If you’re using cutlery, find plastic cutlery, im not talking about the cheap flimsy ones, im talking about the thick type you can get from ikea or other places, make sure it’s rounded in the side you are putting in your mouth, again to not cause trauma to your throat. I can not stress this enough: use👏 something 👏 you👏 can👏 easily 👏 hold👏 on👏 to

☆tools: this is a follow up from the utensil. Please try not to use medication or other methods to induce vomiting, it is extremely dangerous. I have seen a lot of people (specifically on a certain clock app) talking about putting large amounts of salt in water and drinking it to induce vomiting, i can not stress this enough DO NOT DO THAT, it is so incredibly dangerous and by far the most unpleasant way to pvr9e. This is coming from someone who has tried almost ever way, including the salt method. It can cause long term health issues to consume that much salt even if you vomit it back up, there will still be a large amount left in your system which can lead to high blood pressure (which if you are pvr9ing often may already have) and generally if you are going to that extent to pvr9e, take a break from doing it, even if it is hard!!!!

☆food/chewing: make sure that what you’re eating before you pvr9e you chew really well, if you swallow large chunks, it will be hard to get up and you have a chance of choking and it will not be good and is very scary. Bread is especially hard to get up. Some foods should definitely be avoided, such as hard crunchy foods like tortilla chips/crisps, they are sharp once broken and in the time it takes for you to eat, then pvr9e, your body will not have broken it down enough and it WILL hurt coming back up. Try to stick to soft or quickly digest-able foods to avoid pain and trauma to the throat.

☆follow on to the warning signs ☆

☆Bl00d: if you pvr9e bl00d, genuinely stop, i know you might not want to but to avoid damage, stop. If it is anything above a few drops, I greatly suggest seeking medical attention asap. Give yourself a week or two to recover from that, it will be hard but it’s whats best for harm reduction!!!!(this is a very scary thing to experience, the first time it happened i was terrified however as you can see, i am alive, i didnt die although that still doesn’t mean you should just ignore it)

☆feeling like you’re about to pass out/ hands and legs shaking: believe me, you do not want to be found on the floor after pvr9ing. If you’re shaking, take a break, weather its 10 minutes or a couple days, take a break. If you feel shaky, that is a sign you are going to pass out, again, take a break. Sit down in a place you know you won’t hurt yourself if you do pass out, have a drink and rest for a moment!!! I know you don’t want to hear the “listen to your body bull shit” but in cases like this it is vital if you are genuinely trying to avoid permanent damage or injuries of any kind!

☆Thank you for reading, stay safe. My dm’s are open if you need help or advice. If you need to reach out to your local helpline don’t hesitate, you’re weak for reaching out for help!!! ☆

@mamabearwonders

[paloma-ascends-into-hellfire]

eating disorder harm reduction

no one ever compiled this so that it what we are doing today. for people with eds and people whose loved ones do. please note: i’m not a doctor. this is a compilation of things from books and ed resource sites.

for people whose loved ones have an eating disorder:

try to make sure they know these things.

try not to force them to eat, they might feel uncomfortable eating in front of people. also, risk of refeeding syndrome.

if their life is in danger and you are seeking help for them, consult the person beforehand to make sure they will be safe and give them a heads-up so that they aren’t startled (especially if they’re neurodivergent! giving them notice will aid control!)

offer them ways of controlling things aside from food - practice consent, include them in conversations, don’t talk about them behind their back, compliment their makeup or hair.

be patient. the person may be irritable from lack of sleep, feelings of depression, worthlessness, etc., or malnutrition.

keep in mind that you can’t tell if someone has an eating disorder by looking at them. people of all weights do - only 17% of anorexics are underweight - and also, men and non binary people can also have eds.

general:

drink lots of water, especially if you’re drinking lots of caffeine.

drink some electrolytes at least once a week - gatorade, electrolyte tablets, coconut water, doesn’t matter, just get it into your system.

if you are getting dizzy or flushed and can feel your heart beating, quick carbs will raise your blood sugar - sweets, bread, fruit, juice, non diet soda, whatever. keep snacks around pls.

your brain uses 400-500 calories daily. eat more than this.

take your supplements!

you still need protein, have an egg or something.

don’t take adderal or insulin unless you are actually diabetic or neurodivergent, because you are raising the price by buying them and denying access to those who need it.

throw a towel over the mirror. it’s not worth it if it’ll cause you anxiety.

try to limit disordered behaviours like body checking, purging, and weigh ins.

practice good dental hygiene.

put your scale somewhere where you have to actively look for it to weigh yourself.

avoid social media and for your sake don’t go on pro ed tiktok or tumblr or twitter or insta.

get a buddy who also struggles with the same thing if possible to support each other.

get regular medical check ups (if you can afford it)

practice things within your control - makeup, hair, clothing, etc.

push your rules - eat 5 minutes before your time, or 50 calories over your limit.

for people with restrictive disorders (e.g. anorexia):

do weight and resistance training at least twice a week to prevent musculoskeletal conditions such as osteoporosis.

don’t drink on an empty stomach.

try to put gaps between fasting periods.

don’t fast for more than 72 hours.

wear lots of layers to keep warm.

eat an extra 100-200 calories on your period if you menstruate.

have a metabolism day.

take care of your hair.

as horrifying as this is to many people, please go to the hospital if you’re experiencing heart problems or if you’re passing out for more than 30 seconds.

for people with purging disorders (e.g. bulimia):

if you would like to purge, wait 15 minutes first.

after purging: drink lots of water - the emptiness you feel is dehydration. don’t brush your teeth but rinse your mouth out, preferably with an alkaline mouthwash or baking soda mixed into water. do something you want to do, like reading a book or watching a show. don’t smoke. don’t have anything acidic. eat a banana or some chocolate or a rice cake to keep your blood sugar levels in check.

if you vomit blood or your vomit looks like coffee grounds, this is a sign of internal bleeding. you could be drowning in your own blood from a hole in your esophagus, essentially. go to the hospital or call 911/999/the emergency number in your area.

stay safe everyone. i hope this helps. also, i do not use these tags - i have them blocked - but i am using them so that people on these tags will find this because they need it most.

[blissfullyecho]

My Skinny Tips for the Holidays

If you’re in the US, Thanksgiving is this week and next month begins all the holiday parties and events for Christmas, Hanakkuh, Kawanzaa, and all other winter holidays that will include a ton of processed and sugary foods, seasonal coffee’s and fun drinks, and alcohol.

A note for the dieting police out there: Don’t even try it with me.

How I Manage the Holidays + My Body

So generally during November and December, I eat very clean (except for the holidays). I allow myself a Thanksgiving plate with everything (literally everything), dessert, sugary fun drinks/alcohol, and leftovers. This is the same thing I do with Christmas dinner as well. I don’t limit what I eat on the actual holidays, but the other days I do.

How I Eat on Non-Holiday Days

So like I said, I eat very clean in Nov and Dec because I know it’s going to get crazy on Thanksgiving and Christmas Day. So I stick to eating mostly vegetables, soup, and lean protein. I actually stop drinking smoothies this time because I’d rather eat my protein than drink it so I’m not feeling hungry so soon. I get hungry faster when I drink a smoothie than I do with actually eating, so I eat more (just sticking with veggies, soup, and lots of lean protein). I do cut back heavily on bread, rice, and pasta; but my main source of carbs comes from fruit, sweet potatoes, and corn (corn is carb-heavy). I also cut OUT added sugars. I read the label on everything. 0g of added sugar is what I get. Like I said, I still indulge on whatever I want during the actual holiday meal which are things loaded in sugar, so I cut back for the month. And for everyone saying “it’s restricting” … babe, respectfully, shut up. Cutting out added sugar that does nothing for you except make you crash, bloated, ruin your gut lining, decrease collagen production, can increase your A1C (diabetes risk), and turns straight to fat is not restricting. You’re gonna have that stuff on the holidays— you can cut it out for 3 weeks, I promise.

Managing Holiday Office Parties & Community Events

I still enjoy the office potlucks and other mini events because I usually reach for the protein options instead or the veggie options. I’ll have the turkey, the ham, the deviled eggs (deviled eggs hate to see me coming), the cranberry chicken salad, etc. I still enjoy myself, I’ll just not have the pumpkin pie, the Mac and cheese, the stuffing, etc. because I’m saving that for my actual Thanksgiving/Christmas meal. Also… I do not trust other people cooking for me unless I’m there watching things happen. I don’t know what goes on at your house lol.

… But what if Paula from HR brought in her world famous (insert sugary, fatty, super processed, but super yummy food here)?

I’m most definitely going to have something if it’s something I can’t get anywhere else. If there is something that I know looks good (or is actually good) and I’m not gonna have it at my Thanksgiving or Christmas dinner, then I’ll have some. I don’t say no because it’s not part of my “diet”. There’s this girl I used to work with and she would bring in these cheesy, turkey, apple, and cranberry sliders. They were SO GOOD. I would have 1 slider and then load up on the celery and other veggies or fruit.

Alcohol

I’m not drinking alcohol unless it’s Thanksgiving, Christmas, or NYE. That’s just a no go for me. When I drink, I like to drink socially. But there’s 3 days for the rest of the year where I’m going to be drinking all night, so I don’t have any alcohol unless it’s the day of the holiday.

Bring in a healthy side option

For my office potluck, I’m making a fruit bowl, a veggie plate, and a large charcuterie board. My work bestie and I will prob be the only ones picking off of the veggie plate, but at least we do have options to load up on in case Paula from HR brings in that delicious yummy option and we want a full plate of food like everyone else.

If I’m going to have it on Thanksgiving or Christmas, I’m not going to have it anywhere else (unless it’s protein)

I will skip the sweet potato casserole and the macaroni and cheese because I’m going to have it on my Thanksgiving and Christmas. Again, I don’t care for home cooking unless I was there watching you cook for me (or if you’re a cute old lady or a grandma, I trust them so much). But the point is, I’m not going to have 8 Thanksgiving dinners this month. I’ll have one with my family and that’s it. I’m not even doing a Friendsgiving this year (but that’s only because we’re all traveling or working). But the main reason we gain weight during the holidays isn’t because we have a treat or two, it’s because we are having a Thanksgiving or Christmas meal every 2 seconds.

What’s on my Thanksgiving/Christmas plate?

I eat whatever I want, but I’ll only have a plate and a slice of dessert. I don’t get seconds or thirds. I’m a one plate girly and that’s it but I load my plate with everything and I give myself solid amounts. I don’t put tiny scoops of anything on my plate. I’d rather have food on my plate that I can’t finish rather than me cleaning my plate because I didn’t put enough of anything on there and still feeling hungry and restricted. I want to enjoy myself with my family. Thanksgiving and Christmas isn’t the time to feel restricted. For dessert, I’ll have a slice of a dessert. This year I’m being told we’re having pumpkin pie and Dutch apple pie, which are both my favorites. So I’m going to have HALF a slice of pumpkin pie and HALF a slice of the apple pie and it’ll equal to one full slice. With alcohol, I’m always drinking water. I actually drink water with my meal and drink alcohol around the meal. I personally like to stick to red wine.

How do I handle leftovers?

My family likes to give the kids (which would be me, my sibling, and our cousins) the leftovers so we can take it home. I try to take most of the protein, green bean casserole (my all-time fav omg), and deviled eggs (my grandmother makes the best, it’s impossible to beat her tbh) whereas my sibling and our cousins like to take the macaroni, garlic mash, stuffing, sweet potato casserole, and the other foods.

Exercise

I’m exercising everyday. Even on Thanksgiving and Christmas I’m exercising. I have my own routine but on Thanksgiving and Christmas, I’ll also be doing a hot (plump) girl walk after my meals to help my food digest. But even on my rest days, I’m doing active recovery.

The whole month isn’t a holiday.

I think you just have to manage the holidays by reminding yourself that’s it’s not Christmas or Thanksgiving everyday. You don’t need a full Christmas or Thanksgiving plate each day. Still enjoy the fun Starbucks drinks or Kelly from the marketing department’s apple pie, but order the tall Starbucks and not the grande or venti. Have a slice of the pie and not 1/3 of the pie. Don’t eat the candy on the table that you don’t really care for but it’s within reach so you eat it anyway. Save that for something you actually do like.

…And for anyone who is going to rage type a weird message saying I’m promoting anything unhealthy, please save yourself the time.

Happy Holidays! 🤍

✨ My new book “The Luxe Girl’s Playbook” is available now (this is the link). It’s about going into 2025 a brand new, leveled up version of yourself mentally and how you can make everyone that doubted you absolutely sickkkkk. It’s the mental diet we all need. It’ll be unavailable mid-December 2024 🫶🏼

[alexanderwales]

Notes on 3000 miles

Last year my doctor told me that I had high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and a high resting heartrate. So I started biking on an exercise bike, and by my best estimations, I'm either close to hitting 3000 miles or have already gone past that.

I should clarify that this wasn't all at once. I took many breaks.

So here are some notes.

When I started, I was on an exercise bike that my wife had gotten from her work. It wasn't the best, but it was free, and I made a deal with myself that if I biked every day for a month, then I could justify getting something better. I really really did not want to buy a piece of exercise equipment that would just sit in the house gathering dust, because that would feel awful ... but I do kind of wish that I had gotten the better bike sooner, because it removed some of the "friction" of exercise, where it felt like there were too many reasons not to get on the bike. The new exercise bike (a refurbished Peleton off Facebook marketplace that my wife got me for Christmas) really does just feel and move better. I think the general principle of not doing costly monetary commitments until you've shown costly personal commitment is a good one, however.

Blood pressure is in normal range. Cholesterol is in normal range. Resting heartrate is in normal range. This was all the case three months in, and this level of cardio is more than enough to maintain it.

Right now, I bike for thirty minutes a day, going 8-10 miles according to the bike. That range is enormous, because it represents vastly different amounts of work. Going 10 miles in 30 minutes is 20 miles an hour, and I keep the resistance relatively high, so by the end of it I'm always panting. By contrast, going 8 miles makes me feel like I didn't put in enough work.

My goal every day is sweat-based and completely qualitative. I want to soak through a shirt. This means that doing more laundry than I'd prefer to, which is an unanticipated consequence of the biking. It's also, compared to all the metrics the bike gives me, a very clear sign that I am actually exercising my body "properly" in a way that's achieving something.

I did some of the Peleton classes, and found a lot of the metrics to be motivating, but ... eh. Exercise is mostly about being healthy and maintaining my body, so my current strategy, for the last six months, has been to either shut the brain down or keep it fully engaged in something that passes the exercise time. Usually this means a TV show, especially a foreign one with subtitles, which need slightly more brainpower.

The final two minutes is always the worst. I'm just ready to be done with it. Sometimes there's gas left in the tank, but I still feel sweaty, thirsty, and overheated. I have a water bottle, and I drink from it while I bike, and I have a fan pointed at me that I turn on once I'm warmed up, but I always have a sense, in those last two minutes, of "finally I'm done". I tried the thinking man's solution, only biking for 28 minutes, and this did not help. In my entire year of biking a half hour a day, I didn't ever elect to go into overtime.

I initially lost ten pounds, then slowly gained it back. I am, in fact, overweight, but I'm holding more or less steady now, and there have definitely been some body composition changes, with muscle replacing fat. I went down about four inches at the waist. I've changed very little about how I eat (which is 90% meals that I cook myself, and a daily coffee drink of some kind, usually made myself with sugar/cream/chocolate). Biking amounts to 300-400 calories a day or something like that, so I'm presumably eating more to compensate and just not realizing it.

Mental health has been rocky, but that's just sort of how it is for me. I definitely feel less mentally well on days that I don't bike, and feel better afterward, but I have no idea how tight the correlation is, and if I had been keeping track on a mood tracker, I'm not sure I would be able to sus out from self-reported mood alone whether or not I was biking.

During the summer I replaced a lot of indoor exercise bike stuff with outdoor biking. My son has only recently learned to bike, so he's been with me many of these times. Usually that means that we're either biking a lot less distance, or we're biking for a lot longer time at much lower intensity, sometimes both. There's a bike path that's downhill from our house which goes for maybe six miles, with some good, clear turn back points, but that means a fairly arduous uphill to get back home. If I lived in a place where the weather wasn't frigid for almost half the year, I would probably be doing outdoor biking more.

I think the most important thing, if you're doing exercise every day, is making sure that you're doing it in such a way that it's sustainable and virtually incapable of injuring you. This mostly means proper form. Early on, I had a habit of pressing down the right pedal with the outside edge of my foot, and after fifteen minutes of doing that, the muscles in the foot would be aching and uncomfortable. I'm not sure why I was doing that, but it was difficult to get myself to bike in a way that wouldn't be putting strain on me.

I think it's okay to skip a day ... if it's for the right reason. Of the days that I've skipped, I always try to make sure the reason isn't "fuck it, I don't want to". I should either be feeling sick, feeling like I need to rest, or replacing biking with some other form of exercise like a hike in the woods or some weightlifting or something. If I start skipping days because I just don't feel like it, that's where the whole scheme falls apart.

I am currently sort of wondering how long this is going to go on for, and I think the answer is "for the rest of my life", or at least until I'm unable to keep it up for whatever reason. I don't think there's any particular reason to prefer an exercise bike (or regular bike) over running or rowing or some other form of cardio, but I think I have proven to myself that this is cardio I can do daily and stick with it to the level that is probably necessary for me to stay healthy. I'm not committed to doing it for the rest of my life, since in theory some other form of cardio might come along and sweep me off my feet.

I do wish that I had started earlier in my life, even if daily exercise has not been the panacea for mental health that I had been kind of hoping it would be. I hope that I have the willpower and wisdom to keep up with it indefinitely.

[cerezzzita]

Hi, i saw you have your request open so here i go, requesting some hcs for Dante, Vergil and Trish having a short sweet-toothed s/o who also loves to bake.

notes: heeey there, anon! In advance sorry for the waiting, it took long enough but at least here we are! I hope you like it, because I surely did loved writing these headcanons, and with Trish being included? Better than ever!

Enjoy the reading and thanks for requesting! <3

⠀🍓 ˖ . ᵎᵎ Dante, Vergil & Trish with a short sweet-toothed S/O

♡ tags: gender-neutral reader, no use of pronouns (you/yours only), no description of reader's appearance, short!reader, use of petnames, three devils being soft af, Vergil and Trish might have been sorta ooc pardon in advance.

ⓘ gif's not mine!!

Dante

Perfect match, to be honest.

Calls you "shortcake" or "shortie" most of the time and if you're annoyed by that… he'll keep doing it, sorry. He loves you enough to annoy you as well. 

Being as sweet-toothed as he is, no wonder he'll ask you constantly to make some desserts with strawberries or red fruits in general such as raspberries or cherries. 

And please don't let Dante get one inch near the kitchen, this man will eat as many of the berries plus he's catastrophic at cooking.

At least let him add some of the ingredients and mix them together here and there, he'll be satisfied and happy enough. 

He'll eat the batter when you're not looking, by the way. 

Still on the ingredients topic, doesn't this bitch (affectionately) loves when you ask him for help to reach something you can't? He's all smugly smirks, towering you with that huge figure of his and in the best of the cases, lifting you so you can reach it by yourself. 

Dante's personal favorite dessert made by you became The Devil's Cake, but instead of being fulfilled of chocolate only, there's lots and lots of strawberry jam and fresh strawberries on top of it. 

Late night munchies are a must! You two can and will be watching whatever series or movies while cuddling and devouring almost all of a whole damn bakery because Dante has a black hole instead of a regular stomach. 

Saw a recipe for dessert pizza once, got obsessed with it, asked you to make it, you made it, he's even more in love with you. 

"Babe, you're a sweetheartie. A candy angel, I love you so much," said Dante, mouth full of sweet pizza and eyes full of tears of joy and passion. 

ⓘ gif's not mine!!

Vergil

Vergil strikes me as a cinnamon roll enjoyer. That's it, that's the post. 

But really, I don't think he has a sweet-tooth or enjoys sugary foods that much. He likes it, sure, but at moderate bits. 

Unlike Dante, he does not make fun of your height… Yet he finds it quite endearing. 

Calls you "little bird". Let me have him be affectionate and lovely for a sec, okay? 

Vergil also gets worried by the amount of sugar you consume. 

"You'll get plenty of cavities if you keep eating desserts at that level." 

He helps you with your recipes too. I'm kinda sure that Vergil knows a thing or two in the cooking field, correct me if I'm wrong (I am wrong). 

As previously said, he likes more, hm, refined flavors, such as cinnamon and vanilla and if you're baking cinnamon rolls, count him on it! 

Don't ask Vergil to chop the ingredients unless you want him to put on a show about it. 

If you like drinking tea, you better prepare a bunch of sweet treats because you're having regular, calm silent tea evenings ft. Vergil and his poetry book. 

ⓘ gif's not mine!!

Trish

Oh my, what can I say about Trish?

She's not a sugary-sweet person. Instead, she's mostly on sour candies and neutral fruits field. 

With that being said, I hope you're ready to constantly bake lemon pies and banana cakes. 

Trish does not know how to cook for her dear life, she prefers watching you instead and maybe teasing you along with it.

"Trish, I could use a little hand." "Pardon me if I can't help but think you're all cute on your own, sugar."

Speaking of teasing, this devil surely knows how to make you fluster with her little comments about your height, but of course, always keeping it comfortable enough to not get you mad or sad. 

"Need some help there, honeypie?" "My, if you ever get trouble reaching that shelf, you need to wear some of my heels."

And although Trish is not your sous chef, she is certainly your personal tasting critic, which is an advantage mostly to her. 

"So, what do you think?" "Hm, I liked the caramel on top of the fruit, and it's sour just in the way I love. It's a ten out of ten, honey." 

Brought you some silly clothes like sweaters and shirts with some candy motif and oh, sure, fruity flavored lip gloss. 

Anything for her honeybun~

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