#I need to get my shit together and make an official post cause there's a slight difference in my second version

[gixxie]

Gixxie I wanna see 👀 do you have a bigger version of your PFP 👁️

🖤🐈‍⬛

hihi kitten hope you're doing gooood!!💚💚💚💚 YES I DO!! 🥺🥺It's fine I'm not internally screeching or anything. Or dying. Or undeniably in love 🥹🥹💚💚💚 @/L1p3k4 is so fucking talented!! thank you for asking sweet kitten 🥺

[puckinghischier]

I can just imagine doing a “soft launch” with Nico and him not understanding the concept of it and posting just a picture that’s very much you and the teams gc blowing up giving him shit

when you opened the burst of notifications suddenly flooding your phone, you’re confused. sure, you had just posted a soft launch of nico on your account, but you didn’t expect this kind of reaction to it, most of your close friends and family already knowing about him.

when you open the instagram app, though, you see none other than a post from your oh so sweet boyfriend, your smiling face next to his looking right back at you. his comments are full of fans talking back and forth about who you are and where you came from. you noticed the sudden influx of followers to your account, quickly switching your profile to private before any more make their way through.

the two of you had discussed doing a soft launch last night, agreeing that now is the time to do it, seeing as you’re getting pretty serious. you thought nico understood the concept, but bless his heart, he didn’t.

he had posted one of the most recent pictures the two of you had taken together. you were standing nestled close to him in front of the large tree at rockefeller center just across the bridge, big, loving smiles on both of your faces. the icing on the cake, though? he tagged you in the picture.

you noticed a few of his teammates in the comments, cheering the new relationship on and congratulating him for making it social media official.

ones such as timo, jack, and jesper, however, were poking fun at him. the three of them were the first of nico’s teammates you ever met, so you feel a bit closer to them than some of the others. you had actually crashed their lunch yesterday, joining the four hockey players for a quick cafe meal in-between practices.

they were included in your conversation, asking them their opinion and if it was too soon. when they all gave you their approval you continued the conversation with nico later that night, setting the plan into motion.

jack’s comment read “wow cap, this launch was about as soft as a rock,” while timo’s was along the lines of “soft on the ice, but not on the launches.”

jesper’s was a bit more to the point, simply stating “you’re not supposed to tag her, dumbass.”

before you could read any further comments, your screen was taken over by an incoming call from none other than your new instagram official boyfriend.

“sweetheart, i fucked up. i’m so sorry. i should have asked what you meant last night, but i thought we were just posting about each other. i had no clue it was supposed to be secretive and clever. you should have just told me what to post, now-“

“nico, neeks, calm down. take a breath, it’s fine,” you laugh at his rambles, interrupting his spiral that started the second you answered the phone, not even getting to say hello.

“you’re…not mad?” he stops mid-sentence, confused at your lack of fury at his mistake.

“no, i’m not mad. even if it did cause my phone to nearly crash because of how many notifications were coming through, it was cute,” you smile through your sentence, even though he can’t see you.

“oh…well….i guess i didn’t need to leave practice early then, huh?” he tells you, right as you hear the door open to your apartment, nico standing there with the key you gave him in hand.

you hang up your phone, standing from your couch and walking over towards him.

“why in the world would you leave practice early for something as silly as this?” you stand with your hands on your hips, looking at him disapprovingly.

he doesn’t meet your eye, seeming bashful all of a sudden. “well…if you were going to yell at me i would rather have had you do it in person, that way i could kiss you and tell you i loved you in person instead of over the phone,” he tells you honestly, looking like a little boy getting scolded by his parents.

rolling your eyes at him, you walk over and run your hands through his hair, letting your hands stop at the nape of his neck, arms resting on his shoulders as he looks down at you.

“well i’m not mad, but you can still kiss me and tell me you love me, since the entire state of new jersey—well, the united states and most of switzerland, probably—knows now,” you poke fun at him, scratching the bottom of his scalp while his arms come to circle around your waist.

smirking down at you, he meets your lips in a sweet kiss, barely able to savor it before his phone starts buzzing like crazy in his pocket, distracting both of you.

“now listen, i know i don’t have that many followers to freak out about my new hockey star boyfriend, so who’s blowing your phone up?” you pull back from the kiss, looking down at where his phone rests in the pocket of his sweats.

he pulls the device out, bringing it over so both of you can look at it. you see the messages continue to come through, the same name being seen on all of them: “the handsome devils”.

“that’s your groupchat name? the handsome devils? how original” you laugh at the team’s lack of creativity.

“it was jack’s idea,” nico shrugs, the explanation making perfect sense.

you can hardly read the messages because they’re coming in so fast, but you catch a few.

“nico, do we need to host an instagram class in lieu of practice one day?” dougie offers his admin skills to his captain.

“cap, even i know that soft launch means partial, not a full face shot,” followed by “i didn’t mean that the way that sounded, jack, don’t laugh,” from curtis, and then a “HAHAHA” from jack.

“does this mean i have to start calling her mom?” from luke was the last one you saw before looking up at nico, his furrowed brow showing his annoyance with his teammates.

you reach up to smooth the wrinkle between his full brows, leading him to look up at you instead of his phone.

“nico, they’re just poking fun. they all mean well,” you assure him, taking the still buzzing phone from his hands.

he pouts at you anyways, huffing out a sigh. “i just…felt really bad about all of this and they were all laughing at me when i was rushing out of the locker room, worried you were about to break up with me.”

you can’t help but let out your own laugh, finding it comical he actually thinks you would break up with him. his pout deepens at your laugh, crossing his arms and tucking into himself, yet again looking like a child.

“nico, i’m sorry, i’m not laughing at you, it’s just funny you think i’d break up with you over being too excited to tell people we’re dating and posting one of my favorite pictures of us on your very public instagram,” you assure him, untucking his arms from themselves and placing them back around your waist.

he lets himself relax a bit, getting comfortable in his hold on you again. “it is a really good picture of us, isn’t it?” he asks, looking down at you.

you nod your head yes, humming out a “mhmmm” before standing on your tip toes and pressing a kiss to his nose.

“now, why don’t we go make ourselves comfortable on the couch, order food, and think of snarky comebacks to send to your teammates for making fun of you?” you suggest, causing his face to light up.

“i knew i loved you for a reason,” he says enthusiastically, taking your arm and dragging you over towards the couch.

[thydungeongal]

I can't imagine what life must be like for you. You wake up every day shitting and pissing yourself with rage because somewhere in the world there are people playing D&D and even worse, playing it WRONG. You don't have to play it with them or even hear about them doing it but the fact that they exist and there's no way for you to stop them will cause you endless torment for the rest of their life. "

Stop homebrewing!!!!" you scream through tears, "Don't you understand that there are other games?" But they do not respond because they do understand, but they know you are mentally incapable of understanding that people who heavily homebrew their games do so because the act of homebrewing a game is the fun they are after. You are doing the equivalent of yelling at someone who plays modded Skyrim because don't they know that Pathologic exists? But they do know Pathologic exists. They do not want to play Pathologic. They want to play modded Skyrim. Because modding the game IS the fun they are having. For them, the modding is the game. And going to play a different game instead would not be the experience they are looking for.

You do not and will never understand that for the majority of the D&D playing population, it is primarily a social activity. A way for them to kick back and hang out and have fun with their friends. The idea that they would factor in the opinions of some random loser on the internet is absurd. You are going up to a group of guys who get together and shoot hoops every friday after work and screaming "NO!!! YOU'RE NOT FOLLOWING THE OFFICIAL NBA RULEBOOK! YOU'RE NOT EVEN KEEPING SCORE!!! TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY!!! AND WHY DON'T YOU PLAY HOCKEY INSTEAD!!!" But they do not care. This is a recreational activity to bond with people that they care about, and you are such an unlikable little creep that you will never know what that's like.

"I'm just trying to get them to engage with the art form!" you lie, "Only playing one game is like only reading one book or only watching one movie!" Except that the average number of ttrpgs that the average person has played is still 0, and even when you count all people who have ever played D&D, the vast majority are people who played a couple of games and then never got back to it. You're acting like this is some massive moral social disease that needs to be cured to solve the anti-intellectualism problem in society as opposed to being the niche hobby of a small portion of the population.

"I just want to show people how great other games are," you lie, because if you actually did want that you would spend your time talking about your favorite games and what makes them great instead of spending all your free time insulting D&D players for the fact that they don't already play these games. I love so many TTRPGS and there are so many others that I would love to get to play, but I can't talk to people about them because so many D&D players first exposure to other game is people like you screaming at them that "EVERYONE WHO PLAYS D&D INSTEAD OF MY GAME IS A FUCKING MORON IDIOT FASCIST WHO SHOULD BE SHOT" and it immediately turns them off from wanting to try those games.

Like maybe if more of you spend your time talking about how cool your last game was, posting session diaries online, discussing your favorite mechanical interactions, posting actual play podcasts or youtube videos, that would entice people to want to try, but in order to do that you would have to understand what having fun playing a game feels like, and you fundamentally don't.

You are the worst thing to happen to the hobby you're actively sabotaging people from wanting to try new games. Honestly Hasbro should be paying you for doing their work for them, making it look like if people leave D&D to try other systems they'll be surrounded by people who scream at and insult them nonstop.

At this point D&D is popular because it is popular. If I want to play D&D, I know I can find a group. If I dig harder, I know I can find one of the other big names (call of cthulhu, vampire the masquerade, pathfinder, MAYBE shadowrun) but finding a full table of people who are all interested in playing a more obscure game (and not even super obscure, even stuff like monster of the week or blades in the dark), and specifically who all want to play the SAME more obscure game? That's really challenging and you strike out a lot, and the fact is hat people get into this hobby because they actually want to fucking play game, not sit around imagining what it would be like to play and then argue with people on the internet.

And the funniest part of all this bullshit is that it literally does not effect you in the slightest. Those five friends hanging out after a hard week of work roleplaying about kissing elves in their basement half a world away are not going to break into your house and make you play D&D and play it their way. It shouldn't upset you but it does, because you are an unhappy person and rather than acknowledge that and deal with it you would rather put the blame for how you feel on some random people you have never met and will never meet, so you spend all your time on the internet frothing at the mouth with rage, trying as hard as you can to make everyone else as miserable as you are.

But it doesn't work, because those people aren't reading your posts. They are having fun kissing elves in the dungeon, blissfully unaware of what some miserable, unpleasant assholes on the internet think about it. They are having fun with their favorite hobby and you are not, and a hobby will never be defined by the 1% of people who spend all their time complaining that the other 99% are doing it wrong, it's defined by what the 99% of people involved are actually doing, and that's what makes you mad and that's what makes you such a fucking worthless loser.

Your mistake is assuming that when I write about RPGs, even critically, that I'm having a bad time, but I actually enjoy the intellectual exercise of thinking about the things I enjoy critically. You should try it too! :)

Also I'm very glad that you've really nailed down on my ideology of "everyone who plays D&D instead of my game is an idiot fascist who must be shot," a thing I am always saying and am in fact famous for saying.

[misfit0789]

Holidays from Hell

Alyssa Naeher x Reader

Summary: Alyssa and R's Christmas is crashed by R's family. It doesn't end well.

Word count: 4.7k

Warnings: Nose bleed, emotionally/mentally abusive family, hurt/comfort, homophobic comments

This has been done for a couple of months, and I wasn't planning on posting it just yet, but since Uncle is officially retired from the national team, I thought there was no better time to post it! Hope you enjoy!

I slowly open my eyes to adjust to the morning light peaking in through the blinds. I stretch as best as I can

with one arm under my partner of 4 years. I feel her start to stir as I cuddle back into her from behind.

"Merry Christmas baby," I whisper into her ear as I press a kiss just behind it. She turns in my arms to look me in my eyes, before she presses a kiss to my lips. I relax into the kiss savoring it knowing we will face chaos shortly.

"Merry Christmas my love, are you ready to see your mom?" She asks her left hand coming up to cup my cheek. I sigh and lean into her touch.

"I don't think I will ever be ready to face her. It was a lot easier to ignore her when I moved out and could put the blame on practice and other stuff. But when she shows up on my door step 2 days before Christmas demanding to spend the holidays with us I'm not sure I can ignore her then. I'm pissed that she ruined our plans though. I was so excited to spend the holidays with your family. I was looking forward to seeing them all." I take a deep breath to try and get my emotions under control. She gives me a soft smile before she leans in and places another kiss on my lips.

"We will power through this together. Besides my sister will be here this afternoon to help prepare dinner before my parents arrive at 5. We only have a couple hours of your mom alone today. We can do it." She says, I give her a small nod and one more kiss before moving the blanket to the side. Knowing my mother she will find some way to fuck this up just as she has everything else in my life.

I stand and stretch before making my way to our ensuite bathroom to do my morning routine. Alyssa not far behind. As we make eye contact through the mirror I pull a funny face with my toothbrush hanging out of my mouth causing her to laugh. I smile at the sound as we both finish our routines before returning to our bedroom to get dressed.

"Remind me why I let you talk me into matching sweaters?" Alyssa sighs. I give her a smile before pressing a kiss to her cheek.

"Because you love me, and because you are stuck with me for the rest of your life and you know better than to argue." I give her a cheeky smile before pressing one last kiss to her cheek as she rolls her eyes. I stand in front of our closed bedroom door and take a deep breath as I reach for the door knob. Just before I can open the door though it flies open smacking me right in the nose.

"Shit!"

"Oh my god! Y/n! Are you okay?" Alyssa runs over to check my nose. I tilt my head back to help control the bleeding. I peak one eye open and see my mom standing there.

"Oh please, you are fine. Allyson there is no need to worry over her. She will live. Now what is for breakfast? I am starved. You'd think it's our first Christmas together in years and-"

"Mom! First off her name is Alyssa, second you invited yourself here. There is no reason for you to barge into our bedroom demanding food. It will be ready when it is ready. Go sit in the living room. We are doing gifts before food anyway." I say before taking another deep breath, moving to the bathroom to get a tissue to plug up the bleeding. I can feel Alyssa following behind me.

"Are you okay love?" I sigh and give her a nod before starting to clean up the blood from my face.

"I've had to experience her like this before. It's nothing new unfortunately. I'm just happy we were dressed. She once did that and acted that way to an me and an ex. Let's just say that ex and I were over by that night. I'm just happy you stuck around after your first go around with her." She gives me a soft smile and presses a kiss to my cheek. Taking the towel from my hands to help me clean up. She steps in front of me and leans her back on the bathroom counter. My hands move to rest on her waist.

"That's why I said 'I do' when you put this on my finger." She holds up her left hand showcasing her wedding ring. I look at her with what I know is a love filled look.

"And I would ask you all over again in every lifetime." She gives me a smile and continues to clean up my face. "Besides at least she didn't ruin my sweater," I give her a cheeky smile before she leans up pressing a kiss to my lips. "I love you,"

"I love you too, now lets go get this over with before she comes back in here and does worse than bruise your nose." I laugh and nod taking a step back from her so she can throw the towel in the laundry.

We walk out of our room and make our way to the steps, though I stop when I hear more than my moms voice in my living room. A voice that haunted every memory from my childhood since the day she could talk.

"She did not," I whisper. Alyssa looks at me confused. "Looks like you are about to meet the favorite child that you've been lucky enough to avoid. Her and mom together are never good." She widens her eyes in surprise.

"Don't tell me your sister is here," I sigh and give her a nod. "Why is she in our house? We did not invite her!" She whisper shouts.

"We may not have but mom certainly did. I didn't even think she lived near Chicago!" I whisper back. "Text your sister and parents to warn them. Nothing good ever comes from those two being in the same place." The day has barely started and I can already feel the headache and its not the one from a door being smashed into my face either.

"Okay, Amanda and my parents have been warned. Amanda is coming by earlier. So are my parents they said they'll be here around 4 instead of 5. They've heard the stories of your mom and sister and don't want anything bad to happen." Alyssa whispers pocketing her phone. I nod before taking a deep breath.

"Let's get this over with." She presses a kiss to my lips before giving me a nod. I give her a smile and make my way down the stairs.

"Finally, we are starving. What took you and Allyson so long? And why is your face so red?" My sister asks once Alyssa and I make it around the corner.

"I already told mom. Food is after gifts and it's Alyssa not Allyson. Her and I have been together for four years you both know this. Mom opened our bedroom door smacking me in the face. Thanks for the concern." I end sarcastically. I feel Alyssa's hand on my back. I relax at her touch before reluctantly stepping away to start making Alyssa's coffee. I move towards the hooks on the wall we keep our mugs on stopping when my mom speaks.

"There's no need to do gifts." My mom says. I slowly turn towards her a confused look on my face.

"And why is that? It is Christmas is it not?" I ask giving my mother a sarcastic look.

"Well yeah but your sister and I have already exchanged gifts. There isn't anything else to give out." I look at her dumbfounded.

"What about Alyssa and I? You didn't get us anything?" I'm honestly not surprised, mom and Heather have already exchanged gifts. They did this all the time growing up. Heather would throw a fit so mom would give her all my gifts to placate her. I enjoyed the Christmas' I've been able to spend with Alyssa and her family as I finally got to feel the love of a family.

"Uhh, nope." Mom says turning to look at what Heather was showing her on her phone. I make eye contact with Heather over mom's head to see her smirking at me. I roll my eyes and flip her off with my own sarcastic smile before quickly looking to Alyssa.

"If your sister doesn’t hurry up she will have to drive you to the jailhouse to bail me out for killing them." I whisper. She chuckles and nods before giving my shoulder a squeeze in reassurance.

When it's just Alyssa and I we are very touchy and loving to each other. We even show some PDA with her family as we are comfortable with them. My 'family' and anyone else, even her teammates, we are less touchy. Both our love languages include physical touch so we are more lowkey with them. Instead of hugs, kissing and handholding, we usually interlock our pinkies.

"I already texted her. She's on her way my love." She whispers back. I give her a nod before reaching for her hand and giving it a squeeze.

"I need a bit more than linking pinkies right now," I breath out. She nods leaning up to press a quick kiss to my temple. I release her hand and quickly move about the kitchen to finish up making her coffee while she works on my hot cocoa as I was never a coffee drinker.

As we work I can feel her hands brushing against me from time to time as she moves around the kitchen from the kettle on the stove for the hot water and the fridge for the whipped cream. I relax knowing she has no other motives than to keep me calm and from hurting my mother and sister.

~~~~~

"I'm here and I brought donuts." I let out a breath of relief before standing from my seat next to Alyssa at the kitchen island and turning in my spot to greet Amanda.

"I can't thank you enough for coming over sooner. It's been a nightmare already." Amanda waves me off moving to set the donuts on the counter in front of Alyssa who opens the box and grabs one, before Amanda is turning to give me a hug. I relax into it knowing Alyssa and I won't have to fend the demons off alone. She pulls back and cups my face in her hands slowly moving my head around as she looks at my red nose.

"Don't sweat it. Lyss explained it all. I had to get here before you killed them. Although they did a number on your nose. Have you iced it yet? You don't want it to swell." Just before I can respond my mom and sister walk in.

"Oh hello, who are you? You look like Allyson but she's sitting at the counter with - ooh donuts!" My mom is cut off by Heather pushing Alyssa to the side to grab the box from in front of her. I reach out and catch Alyssa before she can hit the floor.

"Hey! Watch it Heather! This is Amanda, Alyssa's twin sister. She's here to help cook dinner. Alyssa and Amanda's parents will be here at 4 for Christmas dinner. If you two aren't going to help please leave the kitchen." I let Alyssa sit in the seat I was previously in before moving towards the fridge to start grabbing ingredients for dinner.

"But-" My mom is cut off as Alyssa shoves the box of donuts, more so what's left that Heather hasn't eaten, into mom's hands. Mom and Heather share a look before leaving the kitchen.

"I'm sorry about the donuts but I will make you whatever you want for breakfast. I just needed to get them out of here before Y/n killed them. Her and her twin are nothing like us. They have competed all their lives, they will kill each other." Alyssa explains. Amanda nods in understanding.

"Don't worry about it Lys. I can tell from that interaction just how bad things can be for Y/n. I mean you two have been together for 4 years and they still don't even know your name." I roll my eyes setting the armful of veggies down before leaning on the counter.

"I still don't understand why they showed up here. I haven't spoken to mom or Heather for over a year. Hell they don't even know Alyssa and I got married!" I whisper to Alyssa and Amanda, knowing my mom and Heather are listening. They could never mind their own business growing up. "I know that day was ten times better because of them not being there. There is no way for Heather to ruin the day if she doesn’t know it even happened," Alyssa and Amanda laugh at my words.

"I know, and it was the best day of my life," Alyssa whispers moving over to me and pressing a kiss to my lips, her arms moving around my neck as my hands move to grip her waist. I smile into the kiss relaxing for the first time today since I woke up with my wife in my arms.

"Okay I get it you two are in love. Can we please start on dinner?" Amanda asks, the disgust clear in her voice. I reluctantly pull away from my wife leaving one hand on her hip, and turn to my sister-in-law.

"Fine," I fully pull away from Alyssa and move towards the knife block on the counter, grabbing a knife to cut the veggies.

Alyssa, Amanda and I work together in the kitchen to get dinner sorted and ready to be put in the oven for when their parents arrive. Thankfully mom and Heather seem to steer clear of the kitchen.

~~~

Just as I set the last tray in the oven for dinner the doorbell goes off. I turn to look at Amanda and Alyssa who are working together on cleaning up the dishes we used when cooking.

"I'll be back," I say before walking towards the front door, but Heather had beat me to it.

"Who are you?" She asks with a bitchy tone. I roll my eyes placing a hand on her shoulder pushing her to the side.

"These are Alyssa and Amanda's parents. They're here for dinner," I say looking at Heather, before turning to my in-laws with a smile. "Hi Donna and John. Merry Christmas!" I move toward Donna to give her a hug, as we pull back I press a kiss to her cheek and turn to John holding my hand out for him to shake. He shakes his head chuckling.

"Your family now Y/n come here," He reaches out pulling me into a hug. I laugh and return the hug, patting his back before pulling away.

"Oh honey what happened to your face? Your nose is all bruised." Donna says.

"Had a disagreement with a door this morning," I supply, "Mom barged into Alyssa and I's room this morning demanding food. She hit me in the face with the door when she came in,"

"Oh sweetheart! You need to ice that!" She exclaims.

"Your daughters have been helping me cook dinner all morning, they've been helping while I ice on and off for 20 minutes at a time. Is Abigail not coming?" I question noticing the absence of my wife's youngest sister. John shakes his head.

"Her and the kids are with Abby's husbands family this year they did send us with the gift for you and Alyssa though!" John says gesturing to the boxes he's holding in his hands. I chuckle and help him with the boxes before turning and leading them into the house.

"May I?" I ask gesturing to their coats once I had set the gifts by the tree next to the front windows. Donna nods and turns allowing me to help her remove her coat before hanging it on the coat rack by the door. I take John's from his hand and hang it next to his wife's.

"Thank you Y/n. I knew Alyssa did right by choosing you," Donna chuckles. Her husband nodding in agreement. I laugh along with them before leading them to the kitchen, but of course we're stopped before we make it there. This time by mom.

"Oh hello! And who might you be?" She asks. I can tell by her tone of voice she doesn't actually care who they are, she's just nosey.

"Mom, these are Alyssa's parents Donna and John. Donna, John this is my mom Y/m/n." I introduce them.

"Nice to meet you!" Donna says holding her hand out. My mom hums looking at Donna's hand in disgust before turning and walking towards the couch where Heather is sitting, some Christmas movie on the TV. I roll my eyes leading Donna and John to the kitchen where their daughters are.

"Remember at the wedding you had asked why my family wasn't there?" I whisper to the two. I glance back seeing them nod. "That's why. None of them care for me, they would have made the day hell. I'm glad they weren't there." I say once we were in the kitchen. Amanda and Alyssa look up from where they are drying dishes, eyes lighting up when they see their parents. They set down the dishes and rags before moving to greet their parents. I stand off to the side letting the family talk, getting lost in my thoughts. 

Why can't my family be like that?

"Babe?" I jump feeling Alyssa's hand on my arm.

"Sorry, what?" I ask, she gives me a soft smile bringing her hand from my arm to rest on my cheek. I sigh and lean into her hand relishing in the comfort she provides.

"You zoned out on us. Are you okay?" She asks brushing her thumb along my cheekbone. I bring my hand up resting it over hers, rubbing my thumb along the back of her hand.

"Yeah, just wish we didn't have the holiday crashers here. I was looking forward to a holiday with just us and your family." I press a kiss to her forehead pulling back to rest our foreheads together.

"Our family," She whispers into the air between us, "They became yours too the day we said 'I do'. Those crashers will not ruin our first Christmas married, Amanda and my parents won't let them," She says pressing a kiss to my lips, "I won't let them," I give her a smile and nod, pressing another kiss to her lips before turning to see her parents and Amanda talking but glancing at us every so often. I turn back to Alyssa looking into her eyes.

"I love you," I say. She smiles pressing another kiss to my lips sensing I need the comfort.

"I love you too. Now lets go enjoy our first Christmas as a married couple," I nod taking her hand from my cheek and intertwining our fingers, before letting her lead us to the island where her-our family is sitting.

"Oh Y/n! Alyssa was telling us that your getting ready to publish your new book. It's the next one in the Awaken series right?" John asks. I smile and nod.

"Yea, the detectives story isn't over yet. Alyssa has been a big help with the details and helping me work through the story line. I think I have at least two more books worth of ideas." I say happy to finally be able to talk about my writing with people other than Alyssa and her team. Those girls are obsessed with the series and keep asking for spoilers.

"Oh that's so exciting! What is the publish date? I want to be sure to get a copy before they sell out!" Donna asks. I move from my spot next to Alyssa to grab the 3 of bags from the counter.

"For you guys? Now," I say handing them each a bag before moving back to Alyssa, wrapping an arm around her waist.

"Wait? Really?" Amanda asks in shock, pulling out her copy of the book. Donna and John doing the same giving me a questioning look.

"Yeah, I had asked the published for a few copies before they hit the shelves in the new year. I wanted my family to have the first copies." I shrug as if it were no big deal.

"Aww thank you! I look forward to reading it!" Donna says setting the book on the counter before moving around it to pull me into a hug. I remove my arm from Alyssa to be able to return the gesture. Donna pulls away and cups my face in her hands looking into my eyes. "I'm proud of you. You've accomplished so much since Alyssa first introduced you to us 4 years ago." I try and blink away the tears ultimately failing. "Oh honey," Donna whispers pulling me into another hug. I feel three more sets of arms around us, without having to look I can tell it's Alyssa, Amanda and John. We stand there for a few minutes before breaking apart at the sound of the doorbell. I turn to Alyssa confused.

"Did you invite anyone else?" I ask, she shakes her head in response.

"No, everyone we invited is here," she says returning the confused look. I excuse myself from them before making my way to the front door. But of course mom is already there. I look at her confused when she turns around with a pizza box in her hands, after shutting the door.

"What's with the pizza? Dinner is almost done," I question. She shrugs handing me something before moving towards the couch, setting the box on the coffee table and sitting next to Heather. I take a deep breath seeing my wallet. I open it and see the cash I had in there gone. "Why do you have my wallet? This was upstairs in my room." I continue to question.

"Your sister wanted pizza, and neither one of us had any cash. I know you always have cash on you so I didn't think you'd mind." She says as if that's enough of an explanation as to why she'd steal my wallet and why they'd order pizza on Christmas.

You've got to be kidding me.

"We've been cooking Christmas dinner all day! Why would you order pizza? Why did you go into my room and take my wallet and money?" I try and keep calm knowing I've been on the verge of lashing out all day.

"What's going on in here?" Alyssa asks walking out of the kitchen. The rest of her family following behind, all looking confused.

"Y/m/n and Heather ordered pizza for dinner meanwhile we've spent all day cooking Christmas dinner." I say, closer and closer to finally losing my cool. Alyssa, sensing this, moves quickly to stand by my side resting her hand on the small of my back rubbing small circles knowing that clams me down. I let out a sigh and slightly relax into her touch.

"It's okay baby, relax." Alyssa whispers into my ear. I relax further at her words but my eyes snap open at the comment from my sister.

"Gross, haven't you gotten over that gay thing yet? I thought that was just a phase in high school." she scoffs. I glare at my 'sister' looking to my mom who is standing by nodding in agreement with Heather. "You could do so much better than her any way. I mean look at her-" she gestures to Alyssa who's touch halts on my back.

At that point all I see is red.

"Seriously?!?" I exclaim cutting her off from continuing. I slowly push away from Alyssa finally at my breaking point. "You can say anything you want to about me. I'm used to your bullshit having been exposed to it all my life, but when you start talking bad about my wife. That! Is where I draw the line." I say moving towards the guest bedroom my mom was staying in.

"Wife?" I hear behind me but I ignore it continuing on my way. I stuff all of her belongings into her bag before moving to the front door. I open it and throw her bag onto the front porch. I turn to her and Heather who look at me like I'm crazy.

"I've had enough of you two ruining my life. You need to leave. Now. Or I will not hesitate to call the police and have you forcefully removed from the premises." I stand and point to the open door waiting for them to move.

"But sweetheart, it's Christmas you can't throw your family out onto the streets," Y/m/n says trying to guilt me like she used to. I walk towards her stopping behind the couch.

"No, you haven't been my family for a long time. My family is those people over there who actually care about me unlike you who has always put Heather over me. For once in my life, I will not back down. Now leave or I will call the cops." The two share a look before moving to the front door. I grab the pizza box off the coffee table before following behind them to the front door.

"Don't forget your Christmas dinner," I call as they get to the steps on the porch. They turn to me, Y/m/n reaching out to take it, I smile sweetly opening the box before throwing it at her causing her to scream and shock. "Oops…I tripped." I shrug before closing the door. I lean my back against it letting out a breath I didn't know I was holding.

"Baby, are you okay?" I feel Alyssa's hand on my cheek, muck like earlier, softly brushing her thumb over my cheekbone. I bring my arms up to wrap around her waist before taking a deep breath, opening my eyes looking into hers. I lean forward pressing a kiss to her lips letting it linger for a moment before pulling back resting my forehead on hers.

"I've never been better. Now I get to peacefully enjoy our first Christmas together as a married couple with your- sorry our family," I whisper, she smiles pressing another kiss to my lips. I pull her closer to me, resting my head on her shoulder as her arms move to wrap around my neck holding me in a hug. I glance up over her shoulder to see Amanda, Donna and John back in the kitchen sitting around the island laughing together.

"Yea, definitely our family," I sigh pressing a final kiss to her lips before moving so one arm is around her waist as I lead us into the kitchen to enjoy Christmas together.

~~~

I watch from my place on the bed as Alyssa gets ready to sleep, moving around the room doing her night routine. The others in the guest rooms having decided to head to bed after we all watched a Christmas movie with hot cocoa. The TV remote in my hand ready to press play on The Santa Clause, one of Alyssa and I's favorites.

"Are you sure you're okay? Today was a lot," Alyssa asks as she climbs under the covers, snuggling into my side. Her head resting on my shoulder but tilted up to be able to look me in the eyes looking for signs I'm lying. I wrap my arm around her shoulder, pressing a kiss to her forehead.

"Of course, I mean my nose will be bruised for a few days but other than that I am fine. This has been a long time coming. I'm sorry it happened on Christmas but I don't regret that it happened. I hope they take the hint and never contact me again." I explain, she smiles leaning up to press a soft kiss to my bruised nose. "I love you Alyssa," I whisper as she pulls back.

"I love you too Y/n, forever." I send her a smile before leaning back in bed pressing play on the remote before setting it down to wrap both arms around my wife.

Best Christmas Ever.

[kekeke32]

TOUCHSTARVED trailer theme theory??

Hi guys, hi everyone. Hope we’re doing well!

SO the full version of the trailer theme is finally out on YouTube and holy shit??? It goes so HARD!!! Give it a listen here.

After rewatching it over and over again, I noticed something so I’ll map out which lyrics appear with which character for y’all to see:

Wish I could’ve added more ss but I’m on the mobile app 🥲 Anyways, I really don’t think the dev team added the characters photos randomly ‘cause check this out:

In Ais’s part, the lyrics are about a certain weakness (ik the lyrics “my weakness” refer to a person but I chose to ignore that jskdksk) and survival. This may be a reach BUT doesn’t this reminds you of Ais’s official character description? Specifically of this part: “Ais seems capable of curing you...but a sick sense of dread surrounds him. He's beginning to suspect that he may not be as in control of his powers as he thought. Can you save each other, or will he drag you down to the abyss with him?" This so-called “weakness” could be his very own powers and he’ll need the player to help him, to “survive”.

Now, about Vere’s part, I don’t have much to say tbh other than the fact that the lyrics “Cause everytime we touch” appear for the first time in his part and I guess you could say it’s related to his frequenting at the brothel? (iykwim 😏) Oh! And you could also see him being touched by a lot of different hands in the trailer. Besides that, his part ends with the lyrics “need you by my side” sung softly by the singer hmm…

Kuras’s part on the other hand, starts strongly (I suck balls at describing music so pls listen 4 urselves, you’ll know what I mean😭) and at 1:59 mins the lyrics are “Cause everytime we touch” then his face darkens a little and it stars an instrumental interlude. I don’t know what that really means but he’s sus

Mhin’s part is sung very softly as well and the lyrics “We’ve been through them all. You make me rise when I fall” are so sweet more so because I think in their route they’ll open up more to the player after going together through incomprehensible horrors and we’ll learn how to support each other <33

Finally, Leander’s part!! Now, LISTEN. His part is the reason why I even made this post in the first place lmao This mf is way too sus but first of all, the building synth progression at 2:58???? oh my god I got CHILLS. literal chills. *ahem* Moving on, his part, starts strongly the same as Kuras’s part did. Their parts are the only ones sung like that… Weird, huh? Anyway, after the lyrics “I can’t let you go. Want you in my life” at 3:49, the song gets SUPER intense and starts sounding very desperate ig?? (kudos to Dan! love his voice frfr) and Leander’s part ends with “Need you by my side”. Okayy y'all… Y'ALL. THIS IS CRAZY. In his part we have both the lyrics "I can't let you go. Want you in my life" AND "I want this to last. Need you by my side". AHHHH Leander you obsessed little bitch (affectionate)

In conclusion, there’s no fucking way the red spring team didn’t assign the certain parts of the lyrics very and I mean VERY purposefully to each LI. The parts suit them specifically well so I highly doubt it’s random but it could also just be me reading too much into this

Whatever!!! Good morning/Good night to this fandom only ^_^

[hauntedbydreams]

First official post here we go… I literally can’t stop thinking abt Vi in wintertime and I just got back from ski break so I need some vi shaped winter coded brain rot 🙂‍↕️🫠

Vi Winter Headcanons

Please this ended up being a whole thing abt her snowboarding, oops

Pure fluff! Myb a lil suggestive at the end? But not rly

Always runs hot. Like no kidding this girl is a walking radiator and has insane body warmth/circulation everywhere. Your hands and feet on the other hand, are always criminally cold though.

So when you crawl into bed and shuffle under the covers to put your freezing feet between her legs while she’s snoozing she jumps “Jesus, cupcake! Give a girl a warning!” But she lets you warm your feet there anyways.

And when it’s cold out and you forget your gloves she always takes your hands and puts them in HER OWN jacket pockets while holding them.

Or she takes them together and blows on them, but it always ends up with her giving you a million kisses and peppering your face after kissing your hands.

Usually followed by a “Vi! Stahp that tickles” and her response is just to kiss you on the lips so firm and press your hips to hers so tight that you swear you go dizzy and see stars. “How’s that? Still ticklish?” She says with a smirk.

Definitely snowboards. Has a really baggy snow suit and a really cute board with Jinx’s graffiti paint that she carved your name into ages ago.

Her snowboard is pink like her hair and it’s all scratched and covered in stickers.

Shreds the slopes boarding and winks at you with that shit eating grin every time she passes you or overtakes you in the snow. But always waits for you at the bottom of the slope before getting on the same ski lift with you.

Begs you to go to the snow park to watch her do tricks on her snowboard even though you ski and can barely land the basic snow jumps. But she won’t stop “Babe please! Pretty please… I promise I won’t be long, just come watch me pleaseeeee” and she’s giving you puppy eyes and blinking at you a million times a second and grinning and you just can’t say no.

So there you are sitting on the edge of a snow park rail, your skis in the snow next to you cause you gave up after the second round and Vi’s just flipping and boarding all over the place enjoying herself so much. It makes you happy to see her so carefree like this.

She’s looking over at you and showing off and of course just as you’re looking at her on the big snow jump she eats it and completely crashes into the snow, landing flat on her face, barely catching herself on her hands in time. She looks over with a sheepish grin, hoping you didn’t see but it’s too late. You’re bent over laughing hysterically and trying to make your way over to her.

You approach her still giggling and she tries to fake being really hurt so you’ll take care of her “ow… uh fuck… ouch. Ughhh I think I broke my nose… ow” and she’s looking up to see you start panicking and your face goes serious immediately.

You’re at her side in a second, taking your gloves off in a hurry, cupping her face, turning her by the jaw to check for injury, worried out of your mind “where?!? Vi, are you ok honey?!? Let me see! Stop moving!”

And then you see her eyes twinkle mischievously, and a slow grin on her face. “Vi! Are you serious right now!?!” U give her a soft punch in the shoulder and shove her. “I thought something really happened! You always-“

She cuts you off with a kiss “I just needed you to kiss it better” you just look at her dazed. She gives you her signature smirk “see, all better now” and she’s giving you another peck on the cheek before she’s off down the slope on her snowboard again.

You sit in the snow stunned thinking of ways to get back at her.

You decide to have some fun of your own and calmly go back to your skis, sitting back on the rail. You start making snowballs and stashing them next to you on the rail.

When Vi shows up in front of you on the snow park jumps again you’d start shooting at her.

Your aim is worse than you’d like, but out of all 15 snowballs you made and attempted to hit her with, you’ve hit her at least 6 times.

When the first snowball hits her she doesn’t quite register it, too busy focusing on the latest snowboard trick she’s trying to ace, but then there’s the next and the next and soon she’s realizing what’s happening mid snow jump.

She’s flipping in the air doing a trick and you land a snowball right at her head.

She brushes it all off in the moment but you can see her eyes change and you’re just giggling to yourself having the time of her life.

She deserves a little harmless snowballing after showing off and eating it just to make fun of you for worrying earlier.

Vi doesn’t think so though. As soon as she’s back up the slope she’s winding down the snow straight towards you.

You smile a shy smile as she breaks right in front of you pausing to quickly unbuckle her feet from the snowboard. Your smile is gone in an instant and the air pushed out of your lungs as Vi tackles you into the snow.

She’s on top of you holding your gloved hands in the snow giving you THE face with the raised eyebrow and you can’t help but notice how hot you suddenly feel even though you’re lying in freezing snow. “Really angel? You thought a snowball fight was your best option?” She quirks a brow at you, smirking, a hint of teasing in her voice.

“Well it got your attention didn’t it?” You counter.

Vi rolls her eyes and kisses you before lifting you out of the snow and standing up in one fell sweep.

She’s carrying you through the snow toward the hut you’re renting on the edge of the ski resort. “Vi! Wait!! What about all the gear?!? My skis, your snowboard!!!”

“I’ll just have to text Ekko or Jinx to pick them up on their way back from the slope, I have other business to attend to.” She’s looking down at you still half covered in snow in her arms as she carries you bridal style.

“Oh yeah? Like wha-“ you don’t even get to finish and she’s tossing you into the deep untouched snow right by your hut.

[chukys-mouthguard]

what are the odds? | part 6

matt rempe x female reader; featuring numerous side characters

social media au!

part 5

mattrempe

liked by your.name.here, kandre.miller, addison.clark and 401,201 others

mattrempe nothing says I’m sorry like some wine and a good board game 🎲

alleyrempe thank god you’re not entirely hopeless

-> mattrempe the boys got me together 🤞🏼

liked by kandre.miller and chris.kreider

-> alleyrempe don’t make the girls have to come after you next time

liked by francesca.kreider and addison.clark

user30284 he apologized!! 😭 thank god

-> user50347 i was ready to give up hope if they couldn’t fix things 🥹

addison.clark who knew he was a cook?!

-> mattrempe stepping my game up because she deserves it

liked by addison.clark

-> addison.clark that she does!

your.name.here no more get out of jail free cards for you sir 😜

-> mattrempe don’t plan on needing one 😉

liked by your.name.here

user35038 so they fixed things?!

-> user20490 i feel like it was probably something dumb

-> user80584 dumb or not it clearly was enough to cause issues…

kandre.miller you’re welcome

-> mattrempe i owe you and kreids big time

-> chris.kreider there’s a new Rolex I’ve been eyeing 👀

-> mattrempe dude I’m a fourth liner…how about i get you a nice Fitbit? 😂

your.name.here

liked by alleyrempe, mattrempe, addison.clark and 354,201 others

your.name.here i guess I’ll keep him 🙄

alleyrempe no take backs this time!

-> your.name.here something tells me i won’t be giving him back

liked by alleyrempe and mattrempe

user20484 shut up this is so cute 🥹

-> user63924 thank god he fixed whatever happened!

-> user10384 i love we assume it was his fault…

-> user63924 literally everyone has confirmed it was him that messed up…😂

addison.clark omg it’s my otp 🫶🏼

-> francesca.kreider i ship them so hard

-> your.name.here i hate you both 😂

liked by francesca.kreider and addison.clark

user20559 I’m waiting on an official post hard launching them…

-> user24943 don’t hold your breath 🙄 lol

mattrempe shit your bf is kinda hot 🥵

this comment was deleted by mattrempe

mattrempe who is that handsome devil?? 👀

-> your.name.here he’s a handsome ranger, get it right 😉

liked by mattrempe

user32055 where is tybauer_ to out them when we need him ? 😂

-> tybauer_ soon enough they’ll out themselves lol

-> user32055 👀

-> user52559 soooo are we getting a hard launch?

-> your.name.here you’re the reason we can’t have nice things tybauer_ 🙄😂

-> tybauer_ 🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼

[rainysofsunshineao3]

It's officially 2 Weeks until Jurassic World Chaos Theory drops so I'm making an overcomplicated really long analysis of:

*THIS* scene because I love them the normal amount :)

SOOOO... Lets start off with this vvv

First off, GOD THE ANIMATION. Screaming, crying, sobbing right now. That hesitant pause, the eyes movement as right before + as she says "Fallen". Our girl is so scared, I'm sure her heart is beating like, 1000 times ber minute. Her eyebrows scrunching together as she finally gets the words out, then raising like a weight is lifted off her shoulders? Goddamn, these animators got me sobbing at a fictional character.

The worry in her expression as she waits to hear what Sammy has to say and as soon as she figures out that it's a positive response, she just gets this look of absolute ADORATION. Look at that full-on open-mouthed smile she gives. She just looks so happy. You can also notice she's taking full, deep breaths again. It isn't really shown in the previous GIF, but girlie was definitely holding her breath. Convince me otherwise.

And then we have this MASTERPIECE vvv

There's so many things in this. She still has that like, half-dazed happy puppy smile and then Sammy kinda just launches herself towards her and you can visibly see the confused "oh shit, wat" widening of the eyes.

And I mean, to be fair, this girl is not the best at romantic cues. Like look at these...

Like, even in the beginning seasons, the way this woman looks at you and you can't tell? And she puts up with your dramatic ass? This is not normal heterosexual behaviour people. I know maybe 1 pair of friends who are straight as a ruler but are a little too comfortable with each other, but that's a minority.

Going back on track...

Yeah, Yaz isn't the best with romantic cues, and also, Damn, Sammy, I can't really blame her. You freaking yeeted yourself at her mouth, of course she wasn't going to kiss you back immediately. Like, y'all, especially for a first kiss, please ask your partner? This actually was my one problem with this scene, and I don't know why it doesn't get talked about more...

Anyway, Yaz closes her eyes the second Sammy touches her (like, fr, girlie was expecting atomic impact) then slowly opens her eyes.

But you can see the good second and a half that Yaz' brain just can't catch up to what's happening and it's the best fucking thing ever. I'd post like, every single time we have a "Yaz Brain Buffer" but tumblr only allows 10 images per post :(

Then finally - actually this time - we have the continuation of the previous GIF (not including the sapphic yearning slides )

Yaz finally just, understands and kisses Sammy back (thank god) but the real focus of this gif is that when they pull away, YAZ IS STILL LOOKING AT SAMMY'S LIPS LIKE GIRL.

Another blink showing "Oh, ok. That just happened" and then we get the sweetest sapphic-yearning-fulfilled soft smile from both of them.

I'd scream with Brooklyn in the background but I CANT cause she's dead *sobs*

God I love these two so much. I need this representation when I was 10. They make me so happy I actually can't describe it. LORD, what a blessing and journey this was.

Hope these two had the same effect on you as they did me :)

TOODLES!!!

[crazyk-imagine]

Breaking Hearts and Making Names

Pairing: Nathan Scott x Fem!reader

Characters: Chris Keller, Fem!reader, Nathan Scott, Brooke Davis, Peyton Sawyer, Lucas Scott, Marvin "Mouth" McFadden, Antwon "Skills" Taylor, Haley James (Scott)

Warnings: Fluff, one tree hill funsies, chris keller being a punk, reader taking no shit, brooke and reader being bestie's, the girls needing to rope reader in, reader is kinda like a fem wade wilson, this was kind of random but also not, I love making reader besties with Brooke, this has been in my drafts for a bit, happy to have posted it, lowkey a stupid fic but a fun one

Word Count: 676

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You turn the corner when you hear him flirting with another girl and roll your eyes. You walk towards the stairs to Nathan’s apartment and raise a brow.

"How old are you again?" You cross your arms, staring at him.

Chris turns around and furrows his brows, confused as to what you’re getting at. "What?"

"How old are you? You're not in high school and yet you're preying on young girls, under the age of eighteen might I add which I believe would make you a pervert." You turn to the girl he’s been talking to and lean in, “you can go now.”

She nods and scoots around him so she can leave.

He scoffs, rubbing his face in annoyance. “Chris Keller is offended and not a pervert."

You lean in closer to him, "would you really prefer it if I called you a pedo?"

His eyes widened. "Man, you're cold."

Your shoulders deflate as your eyes soften, "aw, Brooke taught me well." You spin around and catch her gaze as she walks closer to you, throwing her arm around your shoulders.

"I did and I'm so proud."

You both throw your heads back and chuckle.

He shakes his head, watching the two of you take the lead and walk up the stairs to hangout in your boyfriend's apartment but not before adding, "I know you're checking someone out, you pervert. I would say kiss my ass, but you can't so, suck a d-"

Peyton and Haley have never pulled you away from the railing as fast as they have in all their lives while Brooke throws her head back and laughs, clapping her hands to where it sounds like she’s smacking her hands together.

-

The guys get out of the car and walk towards the defeated musician. Nathan glances up when he hears your laughter.

He can’t help but chuckle, knowing you had something to do with Chris’ defeated look. "What happened?"

The musician lifts his head, staring at the youngest Scott boy with a defiant attitude.

Before Nathan decided to officially ask you out and not hide his feelings from you, he made sure to put the infamous Chris Keller in his place.

"The one in your hoodie is mean."

The Scott brother's glance at one another and nod.

"Makes sense," Lucas says.

He and Haley always liked your style and the way you carry yourself, which explains why you’ve been friends with them for as long as you have.

It helps him when the other guys on the team want to try and pick on him or if a certain guy who refers to himself in the third person needs to be put in his place. But the downer for those who come across your mean streak is-

"She and Brooke have been hanging out a lot.”

“We've never known someone to have the same amount of brazen personality as Brooke until they met and, as Brooke likes to say, they “clicked”. I’m surprised you made it as far as you have," Nathan adds.

"She hurt Chris Keller's feelings."

"Something tells me, she doesn't care," Nathan tells him before heading up the stairs.

“Tell your brother to control his girl.”

Lucas shakes his head, “I’d rather not. She can get pretty mean if I try to tell her to do something.”

Mouth and Skills chuckle to themselves as they pass him.

“I wouldn’t take what she means to a heart man,” the latter tells him.

The blond pouts. “How would you take it if she called you a perv?”

“I’m not, so I don’t have to worry about it.”

Mouth nudges his friend in the side, causing him to whine. “What he means is, you should watch what you say, or you get the look.”

“The look?”

Mouth nods, “the look.”

The two walk away from him, leaving him to follow behind and see the infamous look that your friend was talking about.

He chuckles and thanks whatever karma was in his side to prevent him from getting a stare down from you. 

[whowantslovergirl]

Good Graces

track three of the short n sweet series

Nate Jacobs x reader (reader is female with she/her pronouns)

warnings: cursing, nate, y/n being a bad bitch fr

Summary: If Nate wants to stay with you he has to stay in your good graces

posted: Nov. 20, 2024

I won't give a fuck about you

You were after Maddy and Cassie and you were nothing like Nate ever experienced. It’s not like Maddy didn’t have self respect but she still went back to him. But you, you are different. All the shit that slide with Maddy you would never let that slide.

One time you told him straight up if he mess up again you won’t give a fuck about him anymore.

But something about your confidence he was so intrigued with.

When I love you, I'm sweet like an angel

Drawin' hearts 'round our names and dreamin' of

Writing vows, rocking cradles

You and Nate have been dating for five months and you’re already in love. In every class you’ve been drawing hearts around your names.

After school you’re dreaming about vows that you would say to him and he would say to you.

Even babies crossed your mind.

______

Then when you were going to meet him before you guys walk to class together and you see him making this other girl laugh. He sees you and walk up to you with a smile on his face.

“Nate who was that girl?”

“Just a girl in my class.”

“I’m really trying to spare you so don’t mistake my nice for naive okay?” He nodded and wrapped his arm around your shoulder and walk you to class.

I don't waste a second, I know lots of guys

You do something suspect, as cute as "bye-bye"

Yesterday Nate said bye bye and later that night the same girl who he was making laugh posted a video of her in his truck.

He really thinks you’re an idiot.

______

The next day you blocked him and are now talking to another guy and he’s making you laugh.

You don’t really waste a second when it comes to moving on. You know lots of guys who are just waiting for you to text them.

______

Like, ooh, baby, you say you really like it being mine

So let me give you some advice

Nate was in your house begging you to forgive him.

“I really like it being yours and I didn’t know she was going to do that. I’m so sorry please forgive me. And nothing happened she tried but I really was just talking her home.”

You ended up forgiving him. What can you say?

He has a good tongue.

Boy, it's not that complicated

You should stay in my good graces

Or I'll switch it up like that, so fast

'Cause no one's more amazing at turning loving into hatred

After he was done you pulled him up by his hair. “This does not mean I forgive you. If you want to be mine or whatever you have to stay in my good graces.”

He doesn’t know how fast you can turn loving into hatred.

(I won't give a fuck about you)

I'll tell the world you finish your chores prematurely

“Yea he only lasts like ten seconds.” Nate fucked up again so you’re telling everyone he finishes early.

You told him not to fuck up so that’s his fault. Not yours.

Break my heart, and I swear I'm movin' on

Nate heard about the stuff you were saying and went to confront you but you were making out with another guy by his locker.

He has no idea how you moved on that fast.

Want you every second, don't need other guys

You do something sus', kiss my cute ass bye-ye-ye

You got back with Nate because other guys were boring.

______

You were getting ready for a date when Nate texted you.

Nate <3

something came up sorry

Y/n

kiss my ass

Boy, it's not that complicated

You should stay in my good graces

Or I'll switch it up like that, so fast

'Cause no one's more amazing at turning loving into hatred

When you told Nate to kiss your ass you were going to apologize but that was before you saw him with another girl that night.

So now you officially don’t give a fuck about this or him.

No, I won't, I won't give a fuck about you

He kept trying to make big gestures so you can forgive him but like you told him before you won’t give a fuck about him.

He didn’t actually believe that.

He never dealt with someone like you before.

No, I won't, I won't give a fuck about you

An: im on my grind yall

[brianwashere]

hello!! saw your writing today in my tags and got interested, read some more and you seem really cool :D i got one fic stuck in my head though, the one you posted earlier today with the 7 foot spider reader! it was really cool but i kind of thought about a follow up (and I made sure to check your rules before this)

i was thinking, m/n is really big, intimidating and generally a badass- however. in bed (nsfw) he’s inexperienced, shy af, and ends up just being really submissive (you actually didn’t specify if you prefer dom or sub reader, i assumed you mind neither, but if u don’t feel comfortable with this then just ignore)

thank you, and keep up your great works so far :D

Anon, you’re officially my favorite fucking person ever. Oh my god. This req. warmed my heart. Idek what. It just did. Thank you for reading my other fics too. Wow. I’m reeling rn.

Also you didn’t specify who with so I just did HCs for Noir and Miguel

Pls req again soon! You’re so sweet

**I do not own any characters or part of the franchise from marvel or sony **

Summary: look at req

Tw: explicit activities ehehehehe, language

-Miguel-

The first time you two try anything he’s expecting you to be all dominant and get his ass blasted

Y’all two are making out and he’s ready to take it to the next level

And you’re nervous cause you know he’s expecting you to be this super experienced “knows how to make you scream immediately” kinda guy

The truth is you haven’t had much experience because while people may be into the whole “huge man” thing they’re too scared to actually come up to you and even have a conversation

And you’re also scared of hurting your partner

Just a mix of things that led you to little experience

It doesn’t take long for Miguel to figure it out

As soon as you glanced at his face nervously he knew something was up

At first Miguel is surprised bcc he would’ve expected men and women to practically be hanging from you

Once he recovers from the initial shock he’s down with topping and showing you the ropes

It’s a bit of a boost to his ego, not to mention a massive turn on for him

He never lets you shy away from him/cover your face. He loves seeing you. He knows he’s not stronger than you but he’ll still pull your hands away/pull you closer

But sometimes he does wanna be on bottom

Queue very erotic teaching sessions

When you do something he likes he’ll definitely over exaggerate so you’ll know

He also loves marking you up in more…intense ways because he knows it won’t really hurt you

Clawing your back. He’ll claw the SHIT out of your back.

Biting you too. Sometimes he just can’t help it

He finds out you have god tier stamina and impecable recovery time and will definitely use that to his advantage

*cough cough* Overstimulation and denial *cough cough*

He’s down to do whatever you’re comfortable with but sometimes he really needs some stress relief i.e. getting a blowjob or just fucking you senseless

He won’t admit it but he likes when he’s the little spoon after you two are done

~Noir~

You got nervous and told him the first make out session that you had practically no experience

He was a little taken aback, again, you’re so big and so hot how could people not be lining up for a piece of you

It makes him feel even more lucky to be with you though

“Oh…that’s ok, dear. We’ll take it slow, then.”

Then he finds out your submissive too and he’s pretty sure he has a heart attack

Now he was pretty vanilla at first but then he found the internet and stumbled upon some kinks and did some…research

Behind. He loves seeing your back muscles move and twist under him

He likes tying your wrists together with some of his webbing

It’s strong enough that it could actually hold you if you tried resisting, maybe not for very long, but it wouldn’t snap like thread at the slightest pressure

He loves praising you. Praise. All the time. Always praise. You could breathe and he’d be on his knees for you

Every time he does something new he asks if you’re ok with it

He’ll be gentle if that’s what you want but he figures out that’s usually not the case

Usually you want everything he’s got, as much as he’ll provide you

He does love soft romantic nights with you though

Where he gets to enjoy your large beautiful frame and your contrasting shyness

When he gets to slow down and drink in ALL of you

The noises you make, the small movements, your incoherent mumbling

He loves ALL of it

He’s so down bad for you not even a joke

A little guilty pleasure for him is kissing you senseless

He loves being the big spoon for you, even if it just feels like a backpack is attached to you

[child0feden]

THE RIVER OF TIME

modern! eagle flies x reader

♡ general dating headcanons for modern eagle flies!

୨୧ for some reason i wanted to do a modern version of eagle flies! i will eventually be doing the game version of him too though… sorry for any major spelling errors, i feel kind of sick today <3

♡ related hc available here | view my video game masterlist here

reading music recommendations: the river of time flows through me by blackbraid - moss covered bones on the alter of the moon by blackbraid

♡ i believe with my whole entire heart that modern eagle flies would be a huge metalhead!

୨୧ he’s especially a fan of black metal <3

♡ blackbraid is one of his all time favourite bands, their music gets played HOURLY in your shared apartment…

୨୧ he just resosnates with blackbraid more than any other black metal band he’s found so he wants to appreciate the hell out of it

♡ eagle flies probably has a guitar that his father bought for him for his birthday when he was a teenager!

୨୧ he may have a semi complicated relationship with his father but he’s never replaced that guitar, it means too much to him and he loves it too much! it reminds him of easier times…

♡ he likes to play the guitar for you, he doesn’t play stuff like black metal though, he plays more relaxed and laid back stuff

୨୧ more often than not, his playing lulls you to sleep… he likes that, he likes knowing you feel at ease with him, comfortable around him

♡ to be honest, i can see his relationship with his family being kind of complicated… he has a lot of great memories from his childhood but when his mother passed and he got older, he began drifting away from his father and older brother

୨୧ but he still calls them every now and again and does try to answer their calls, just to know they’re okay and he does still love them, he just needs time

♡ he’s a huge fan of cassettes and CDs!

୨୧ he never had a phone as a teenager and got his music through cassettes and CDs in thrift stores but he still has all of them! when you guys first got together, his collection of them was something you noticed in his apartment and asked him about, causing him to go into a deep ramble about his favourites, he’s incredibly passionate about music <3

♡ he doesn’t really use social media for similar reasons; he didn’t have it as a teen so he never really feels the need to have it now!

୨୧ he has a facebook profile though, just so that he can keep up with the bands he likes and upcoming events whilst sometimes posting videos of him playing his guitar… and when you guys started officially started dating he changed his relationship status, causing his older brother to find out he was now dating you and comment some really cute older sibling type shit

♡ eagle flies absolutely loves when you play with or braid his hair! you’ll play with it softly before transitioning into crafting a small braid whilst he’s supposedly focused on a horror movie that’s playing on the tv

୨୧ but he’s really not that focused on the movie anymore… the second you started playing with his hair, his attention shifted to you, enjoying the feeling of your hands running through his glossy locks

“ feels good… you’re good at braiding, you know that? ” ( you always blush so hard when he compliments you on things like that, they just hit you right in the heart! but you simply hum a response as he chuckles )

♡ a lot of the time when you finish the braid, you don’t actually have a hair tie on you so you just let it sit and slowly unravel itself which makes him kind of sad :( he really wanted to keep it in his hair because you did it

୨୧ he has a kind of tattered black denim jacket with a bunch of pins and band logo patches sewn into it! bands like blackbraid, darkthrone, mayhem, carach angren, morbid angel, venom and many more

♡ sometimes you’ll be in a music store without him and see some patches / pins you know he definitely doesn’t have and grab them for him, excitedly showing them off to him when you get home

୨୧ he thinks this is literally the most thoughtful thing anyone has ever done for him, he loves that you think about him and his interests when out and about without him! he always gives you a big hug and a soft kiss on the your head before taking them from you and wandering off to add them to his jacket

“ no, i don’t have these ones! thank you, beautiful… love you ” ( his deep voice is so close to your ear as he says it, still wrapped in a tight hug, you almost jump his bones but hold off for the time being )

♡ i can see him being a night owl! he’s not a huge fan of the hustle and bustle of daytime, he doesn’t like the near constant passing cars and loud noise… so you guys go on a lot of late night walks together <3

୨୧ with the roads being completely empty, he can actually hear himself think and have a conversation with you whilst walking, connected hands softly swinging between your bodies

♡ often times you’ll walk to a nearby wooded area and just sit on a bench, taking in the sounds of the trees blowing in the wind and twigs snapping under the feet of forest animals…

୨୧ you two probably sit there for a while, switching between sitting in a comfortable silence and quietly chatting about life! you’re always leaned into him, one of his arms thrown over your shoulder and if you get cold he’ll gladly offer up his denim jacket

♡ speaking of which, you adore wearing his jacket! it smells exactly like his natural musk and the cologne he uses

୨୧ when you pull the jacket on, you immediately get a whiff of things like pine, leather, oak and… bourbon… ? yeah, whenever you guys to see a local metal band perform at a bar, he always has a bourbon in hand, he’s very classy when it comes to drinking

♡ a lot of your guys dates revolve around similar trips out! dates are rarely planned between you, you’ll just kind of be sitting on the couch or laying in bed and he’ll raise his head to look at you before asking if you wanna go on a date today

“ do you want to go on a date today? the weather looks nice, no rain on the forecast, what do you think? ” ( hell, he’d still ask you out on a date if it was pouring down with rain, he thinks you look beautiful in any weather )

୨୧ you almost always do! they’re usually small picnics in extremely desolate areas of forest / plains

♡ he’s always laid back on the blanket, his combat boots hanging just off the blanket due to his height, whilst you lay back into him and eat some blackberries you’d found on the walk there, leaning up to offer him one as smiles and takes the berry into his mouth, pressing a gentle kiss to your cheek after swallowing it

୨୧ i can see him being kind of a jealous person but not a loud jealous person, he won’t try to fight someone just for looking at you, he’s a quiet jealous person! responding to his jealousy by having a hand on you or an arm wrapped around you

♡ he can just get kind of super afraid of losing you :( you’re one of the best things to ever happen to him and he really doesn’t know how he’d function without you

୨୧ eagle flies really likes when you wash his hair for him, it took him a while for him to actually let you do it because it’s just a very sacred thing to him

♡ the only person he’s ever let wash his hair for him was his mother when he was younger, it was a ritual of immense love and not something done just because she was the parent and he was the child, it was a show of love

୨୧ when he feels ready to let you do it, he’s kind of shy about it! which is crazy to you because he’s not shy about anything but you can feel that this is something special to him and don’t mention it…

♡ as you’re in the shower together he pauses and takes your hands in his, guiding them up towards his hair as you realise what’s happening and try to hold in your excitement

୨୧ that’s the first time you ever wash his hair for him, gently massaging the shampoo into his head as he closes his eyes and leans into you, bending his back a little so you don’t have to reach up so high! you make comfortable small talk with him as you do it, asking him about music or movies and he’ll mumble a response back, almost falling asleep due to how good your fingers feel massaging his hair

♡ you wash his hair for him almost all the time after that night, a ritual once between mother and son now shared between lovers…

[buckyarchives]

MODERN OBI-WAN KENOBI BOYF HC

I haven’t ever done a head cannon post but with how busy / lazy I’ve been I might post more of these, they’re a lot of fun. probably one for Bucky and Luke skywalker. If you want any other characters just lmk! Make sure to check my request post!

warning: nsfw content (labeled so if you want to skip you totally can)

tea guy, like, it’s crazy. has so many drawers full of boxes and bags. always making you tea to fit whatever mood you’re in

landscaper or teacher, or both. I imagine him teaching younger kids but probably wishes to be a professor of some sort, maybe teaching environmental science.

just really likes plants and flowers but sometimes gets tired of having to craft and trim everything to be perfect so he thoroughly enjoys natural nature and the “overgrown’ aesthetic

Adding onto that, loves to hike, always takes you with and nerds out about the scenery and views.

definitely fosters dogs from the local shelter and takes them on hikes to help leash train them.

unintentionally a pretentious little prick

circle lens glasses and turtle neck combo 24/7

And of course you steal his sweaters ALL THE TIME

Smells like citrus, grass and rain. the warm sun rays and vanilla

Always watching some documentary, or the history channel.

All your friends lowkey want him because he’s. That Guy.

Whenever he blushes it goes straight to his nose, ears and neck.

Frequent at most coffee shops in town so when he started to bring you around it was a big deal for the workers lol, so much gossip. And mild disappointment from the staff knowing obi wan was official taken

Probably hates small talk, finds it tedious and shallow

The most supportive boyfriend in the world, he’s always the first person there to cheer you on

When you started dating him, his cousin/best friend, Anakin, came as a packaged deal. The younger one frequently trailing behind obi wan and now, as you’ve got too closer, you as he’s become a younger brother figure to you.

Not jealous at all, he’s very secure in your relationship and his trust in you is crazy strong. finds it quite amusing when men hit on you in front of him and kinda just lets you play it out.

That is unless you become uncomfortable, he mostly lets you stand up for yourself but if it becomes overbearing he definitely won’t hesitate to cause a small scene.

A big runner and boxer, you’re used to having to help his knuckles heal up from long sessions. As well as joining him on early morning runs if he can get you up and out of bed for it.

He loves art and mostly drew and painted landscapes but after meeting you this sketch book began to fill of pictures of you from every angle possible.

So naturally put together all the time it makes you insecure sometimes

Obviously, obi wan is the best at easing those insecurities. He always notices when you’re feeling off, sometimes even before yourself, so quick to embrace you and whisper exactly what you need to hear.

Another thing, so good with his words??? He always tell you what you need to hear, there’s rarely ever any miscommunication between the two of you because of this and even when they’re are, arguments are not common.

Crazy sarcastic, will say the funniest shit ever with the most monotone face and it just makes it 100% times funnier.

Really likes Taylor swift and David Bowie

Always getting you bouquets of flowers, even arranges them himself sometimes.

“This reminded me of you.”

Such a safe and non-judgemental aura, you’d struggle with asking for help or learning new / seemingly ‘common sense’ things with past relationships in fear of seeming dumb but you feel so safe around obi-wan that those thoughts never cross your mind, always learning new things from him and enjoying how helpful and supportive he is.

Definitely an impala driver, either 40s Chevy impala or the very sleek and fancy 2020 impala premier, probably black and rarely dirty

Not the biggest cuddler in the world but really enjoys naps together, will drape an arm over you but he tends to move around in his sleep so he’s just content with sleeping besides you rather than wrapping limbs

But when he is in the mood to cuddle, it’s mostly on the couch when you decides to binge shitty reality television. He’s usually on his back and you’re laying ontop of his stomach with your ear to his chest

You two constantly binge dating reality shows, always criticizing the other couple and mostly men LOL.

“He did not just say that! Maker, you would have broke up with me then and there.” “Damn right I would.”

You trace all the moles and freckles along his body, obi wan definitely had a skin care routine and moisturizes so I imagine his skin is always so soft

NSFW!

really likes nudes, like the grainy MacBook camera pictures with a matching cute set type nudes (iykyk). Hot and slightly artistic, his favorite.

Doesn’t like porn though, never enjoyed it and it never really got him off, doesn’t like the morals of it either

Also sexting, not his thing. He’s usually more on the serious end when it comes to intimacy but he cannot take sexting seriously LMAOO

lowkey the type to come home from a long day of work and look you in the eye with That Look and you just know what he needs

Thigh guy, the type to take breaks from eating you out by just resting his head fully on your inner thigh and just gaze up at you

Sir / master kink

Will jokingly come up behind you when you’re in the kitchen or something and press his groin to your behind

Just a little tease overall, always doing shit like that and acting all innocent about it

VERY VERY vocal during sex (cough, cough, shallow graves ending scene, COUGH)

[elizamgarts]

⚠️Rant incoming ⚠️

I know this isn't my usual posts but recently I believe it has to be said.

This mostly applies to tik Tok but still it needs to be said in the fandom as a whole.

I understand She ra is a female driven show, it's meant for the girls. I fully understand that and makes sense why most of the girls get the spotlight. But that doesn't excuse blatant dismissal to other characters.

Even in the show there's a very clear favoritism and it's heavily in your face it's honestly crazy.

If you haven't guessed I'm talking about Catra. The fandom and show babies and favors her over even the title character, in a way fine but the fans treat her like she is a baby who needs protection but at the same time is a badass lesbian bitch who can overtake anyone.

So which is it? A baby kitten? Or badass lesbian? You can't have both.

Catra stans really make me wanna pull my hair out from how delusional and annoying they can be. Especially when they despise one character for understandable reasons.

Like yes I get it, Hordak done a lot of terrible shit, he's my favorite character but I do not excuse his behavior for what he did to Etheria.

I'm fully onboard with him serving his time to make up what he did and rebuild what he destroyed.

But Catra? Where's her punishment? Where's her due justice for her crimes?

The show never mentions it. The fans gloss over it cause she's Adora "girlfriend" now she serves no punishment she's a sad kitten.

No.

Absolutely not, I'm sorry but the favoritism is absolutely insane, Catra has hurt far more people personally than Hordak, Catra should equally be held accountable for her actions.

But she isn't. She never is, and the bullshit redemption she had is so ass it's insane the show got away with it.

She never changed, she only says she's working on her anger but she never does. The show refuses to let her be accountable for her actions.

What's to enjoy with her character?

She abused everyone, she gets praised cans called a badass by being abelist to Hordak in the one scene she "takes over the horde"

Let's not forget her sending Entrapta to her death pretty much when she shipped her to beast Island fully knowing nobody comes back from that place.

She killed Glimmer's mother by being the one responsible for pulling the lever.

Let's not forget her years and years of abuse on Adora yet the show forced them together because 'hot lesbians"

All of this, all of the people Catra hurt and she never gets held accountable, what does she get? She gets to join the best friend squad and did absolutely nothing to earn it while Entrapta who's worked her ass off to change and be better never once is officially part?.

The favoritism is crazy.

Why is Catra Trauma taken absolutely seriously and demands to be respected yet everyone else's Truama doesn't't exist?

How is that fair?

And I only post this because recently I guess I hold deep rooted disdain for Characters character because she reminds me far too much of my mother.

My mother was physically and mentally and emotionally abusive, she use to hit me if I made a mistake yell and blame me for something I have no control over, gets upset if I don't do things her way. Or if she doesn't get her way she gets upset and makes me feel like shit for not wanting to do something or for how I feel.

Then manipulates me by showing love and affection only to act the absolute same, nothing changes, I have to work to make her happy when it shouldn't be that way.

All of this is very similar to Catra, she manipulates others into getting what she wants, she abused others physically and emotionally.

She acts victim when things don't go her way.

Her character hits far to close to home for me and it makes me resent and hate her character because I sympathize far more to those she hurt over her. Because she shouldn't be getting away with this. She should work to actually change not say she changed.

I love her design, she has a great design and I still love to draw her but her character?

Her "redemption"

It's so horrible and so terrible I cannot find any liking to the character.

I know this rant is all over the place but it's something I needed to address. And it's something the fans need to understand, I don't hate Catdora because I'm homophobic, I don't want Catra to die or any shit like that. I just want a fleshed out character that gets a better redemption and other characters to get equal attention as her. But all I can settle for is fics.

I do hope Catra stans understand this. But this is why I absolutely hate Catra.

Keep in mind I don't wanna do these rants a lot on my page, I'm a artist page not a rant page but I needed to get this off my chest.

[nightmaretour]

I hate to do this, and it's a long shot I know, but things are getting desperate and it seems like I'm going to be waiting WAY longer than I should be for something that's fairly urgent.

I'm a disabled trans man living in the UK. Recently I was found to have severe anemia, and came up with my FIT test (gastrointestinal cancer screening) a few months ago, and was referred for a colonoscopy to find out the cause, since it looks like I'm having a slow but constant bleed through my GI tract. However, my referral has been awaiting review for over three months now. I'm not even on the waiting list, I'm waiting for someone to decide if I need to be on the waiting list. Since then I've started having GI symptoms such as pain, intermittent loss of appetite, etc. as well as my anemia worsening significantly.

This is of course pretty urgent, but it looks like I'll be waiting months longer once I finally get on the waiting list too. I really have no choice but to get it done through a private hospital, because of the time sensitive nature of, you know, potentially having cancer. I managed to put some money away out of the backpay I got from PIP, but it's not enough.

[ID: A screenshot of an email that's says:

Dear Mr (name blocked out in red),

Thank you for your website inquiry. For your information, the cost of an initial consultation with one of our consultant gastroenterologists is £280."

It then lists the names of 3 doctors as links, all blocked out in red. The email continues,

"The guide price for a colonoscopy is £2,339. For further information, including appointment availability, please don't hesitate to contact the medical secretaries (followed by three names redacted in red) directly on (phone number redacted in red) or call the private patient team on (phone number redacted in red). End ID]

Currently I have around £1,400 stashed away from PIP backpay I got after they royally fucked things up (however I may need to dip into this at points if I find myself struggling). Together the consultation plus the colonoscopy will cost £2,619, which leaves me about £1220 behind. I know I'm most likely not going to get that much from this, but I honestly have no choice but to try my luck here. I really don't know what else I can do.

I really don't like asking for money from people for nothing, but I have a Ko-fi store where I sell handmade screen printed patches, and I'll be adding more designs to it over the coming weeks when I have the time and energy to make new screens. I'm also offering commissions for custom band patches! (Due to Kofi's TOS I can't officially offer patches for bands without their permission.). Below are a few examples of my work:

[ID: 5 images of patches printed in white on black fabric, all sewn onto a worn looking black denim jacket. All are sewn on roughly in red floss, aside from the last one. The first says "only dates I want are tour dates". The words "dates" and "tour dates" are larger than the other text. All of the letter As are replaced with spade symbols. The second is the logo of the band Cop/Out, which is the band name with rough, jagged edges. The third is the logo for The Prodigy, which is the band name in sharp. Zig-zagging letters. The fourth is the logo for the band Subhumans, a stylised skull shouting into a microphone. The fourth is the horizontal silhouette of a crutch. With the words "Talk shit" above it and "get hit" below it. Unlike the rest it is sewn on in black, and the edge of an embroidered back patch is visible just above it. End ID]

I know a lot of people aren't doing well financially right now, and that there are people in far, far more dire situations who probably need your help far more than I do, but I would appreciate any purchases of patches or help you can offer so, so much. Even just sharing the post would be enormously appreciated.

Current progress:

£115/£1220

And of course as pet tax, here's Cynder :)

[ID: A photo of a female wild type leopard gecko laying spread out on a smooth rounded rock in a glass fronted tank. Her head is sideways and raised, looking at the camera with one eye. She looks relaxed and curious. Behind her a large piece of thick tree bark and a plastic cave can be seen. End ID]

[skepticdoe]

Felt the absolute NEED after seeing you post about epic, BUT HERES MY PROPOSAL TO YOU

Which South Park characters would you cast as each epic character (and why if you’re feeling ambitious)

HII!! sorry for the late response, life has absolutely been putting me through the wringer 😓

IVE ALREADY POSTED MY SOUTH PARK EPIC CASTING BUT IVE INTERACTED WITH A FEW OTHER EPIC FANS AND MY CASTING HAS CHANGED A BIT! :)

okay so apologies if this is messy and disorganised lmfao

Odysseus: Stan Marsh for obvious reasons

Penelope: Wendy Testaburger again for obvious reasons

Telemachus: Their child!! -> this would be an original character I guess :p

Athena: Kyle Broflovski -> angsty platonic style 😈 *rubs hands together menacingly*

Hermes: Kenny McCormick -> I dare you to come up with a better casting can you imagine Kenny singing dangerous?? We all know he’s got that Holy Moly ;)

Eurylochus: Tolkein Black -> I feel like Stan and Tolkein have this rocky relationship in general. Tolkein would be loyal to his captain but also has morals of his own.

Polites: Butters Stotch -> he’s that one comfort character that dies at the very start (does this make OdyPoli Stutters (Stan x butters) 🤔)

Posideon: Craig Tucker (Polyphemus and the sheep are like his Guinea pigs lmao 😭) -> I REALLY REALLY wanted Creek to be in this au but I cannot for the life of me fit them in anywhere. One of my very lovely mutuals and fellow spxepic fans recommended Craig as Posideon and the sheep as Guinea pigs (which is genius and I love btw) but then tweek as Polyphemus would be odd considering he’s Craig’s child. Polyphemus and his siblings are just giant Guinea pigs in this for now 😭

Calypso: Leslie Myers -> who better than her to be the manipulator and emotional torturer?

Tiresias (the prophet): Micheal (I just found out he doesn’t have a last name what) -> Tweek actually had this role first but Micheal honestly gives off emo dead prophet vibes.

Circe: Red McArthur OR Henrietta Biggle -> they both give off witchy girlboss vibes but im not sure which one of them would resort to lust for persuasion

Aeolus: Heidi Turner (?) OR Nichole Daniels -> I’m purely unsure of this because I also want to cast Heidi as Hera and Nichole would be a stand in (don’t get me wrong I love Nichole)

Zeus: Eric Cartman -> um. egotistical, sadistic maniac? Who does that sound like? I also like to make this epic au also a stick of truth au so Cartman is currently so powerful only because he currently possesses the stick.

Aphrodite: Bebe Stevens -> she was originally Circe and I still think she’d fit her pretty well too but I needed an Aphrodite and Ares stand in ship and Clybe was the only one that would fit

Ares: Clyde Donovan, for the shits and giggles 😭 -> I literally giggle every time I think of this casting because Clyde the crybaby as Ares is hilarious. He literally only got this role cause of Bebe. But they are both arrogant so in works in that way I guess??

Hephaestus: Christophe the Mole -> passionate weapon master who is all about loyalty and war? Christophe.

Apollo: Jimmy Valmer -> we HAVE to give the role of music god to our local favourite bard

Hera: I was going to cast Heidi here too because Zeus as Cartman and Heidi as Hera and her part in God Games would fit PERFECTLY

Antinous: either Damien or Trent Boyett 😕 -> I needed angry characters that want power and these two are what I’ve got

so yes!!! This is my official unofficial South Park epic casting 😋

I also have an alternative k2 au with Kyle as Odysseus instead but I guess this one is like my MAIN headcanon/casting

I would LOVE to hear your opinions and casting (along with anyone else who’s interested :>)

Thank you so much for this ask and feel free to spam my inbox whenever!! 👍🙌

(this is so goddamn long omfg)