#I mean with Michael in charge it probably work

[skiplo-wave]

Swifites are something else

Be realistic if Michael was still around the fans would literally swallow Taylor’s fans

And now I had cursed idea if Taylor and Michael did a collab together…

[falafels]

FAMILIE GORDON of Birmingham, Alabama

For the purposes of the socmed, which has spawned lore in my horrible little rat mind

Obviously none of this is relevant or real, but this is just for reference when they come up in the socmed au. I also might change my mind on half this shit. never let em know your next move

oldest to youngest: Marcus, Jeremy, Tabitha, Ricky, Seth, Jessie, Michael, Jamie, Scotty

EC canon says 7 boys and Jeremy as second oldest who was basically in charge after Bryan Sr. left and Rebecca (mother) gave up when Seth was 8 and started going by Seth (Bryan Seth Gordon officially). Seth was 22 at the start of tfc i believe so the ages are going from there

Marcus (33) was born when Rebecca was still in high school so he’s a bit older than the others and had moved out, which is why Jeremy ended up raising the rest of them. Also because Marcus lowkey sucks. He means well and gets involved for big stuff but is generally just a bit unpleasant and directionless. He offers Seth his first joint at 11 years old and it doesn’t occur to him that maybe don’t do that

Jeremy (29) was the only one to leave Alabama. When Bryan Sr. left and Rebecca checked out, Jeremy ended up pretty much raising the rest of his siblings. Marcus didn’t, but the unofficial deal was that Marcus would deal with Rebecca- her stumbling in as the sun came up, her missed bills, her drunken vitriol about Bryan. This arrangement went on for years, and when Jeremy was confident they could take care of themselves, he packed his shit into the car and didn’t look back. He drove to Atlanta and stayed in Georgia, where he now lives with his fiancée May and his dog Pedro, and he’s training to be a pilot. He stays in contact with some of his siblings, mostly the older few, but those years took a huge toll on him in a way he never really processed. he feels guilty for how he handled it and how order just came from beating the shit out of each other, he feels angry for having been put in that position, angry for the childhood that ended so abruptly, angry at every adult who stood by. He doesn’t talk much to Marcus and he never speaks to their mother again, but he does come to Seth’s final college exy game and his graduation.

Tabitha (27) looks just like her mother and inherited her horrendous taste in men. She goes by Tabby if she’s in a good mood, which is rarely but you don’t find that out until she’s backhanded you for calling her Tabby. Having also taken on a decent amount of responsibility when their parents gave up, Tabitha never really got the time or energy to grapple with teenage self-loathing so it followed her and manifested in a string of men who treat her like shit, more than one of them violent. She stayed in Birmingham because she’s more attached to her family than she’d like to admit, and because she’d become a bit obsessive around Jessie. As the only two girls, their relationship with each other was a bit different to the others and for someone who comes off as cold as Tabitha can, it seemed suffocating to Jessie. Tabitha did genuinely mean well and was trying to stop Jessie from making the choices she did, but ended up alienating her by coming off controlling or cruel. Like Seth, Tabitha has a bit of a history with harder drugs, but she’s less willing to name it or the grip that addiction had on her and writes it off as phases with boyfriends.

Ricky (24) is Seth’s closest brother and greatest tormentor- all in good fun, but he has also locked Seth in the trunk and done doughnuts in his car before. Ricky wanted to be a race car driver and ended up working at an auto body shop and loves it. it’s not entirely above board but he gets to throw tyres around and sometimes drive the cars really fast down dirt roads so what the hell else does he want. He got Seth a job there in high school (didn’t last) and everyone there has been there forever so it’ll probably be his someday. he has an on-and-off girlfriend called Rita but she’s a bit too into oxys for it to work. he tries to cut it off with her for good after seth’s first overdose but ultimately it’s just endemic and so many people in his life are on drugs that it barely makes a difference and he stays with her

Seth (22) is closest to Ricky and Jessie just because of ages and he’s the only one to have gone to college so they all think he’s gay (idk if the american south has this as well but the meth division of my family all think im gay because i went to uni. thats not why) and half of them just call him college or treat him as wikipedia, which aaron finds out one day and has to physically school his reaction. Seth is teaching him how to make a bong out of an egg when Jamie calls and asks Seth what language they speak in Indonesia and when to know if you need to amputate your foot if it’s been stuck inbetween trees for six hours

Jessie (21) is probably chained to a tree somewhere in South America. Jessie was the one who taught Seth (and the others) Sylvia Plath, mostly through brute force, because she thought the bell jar was important reading. She wasn’t the smartest student, but she’d engage hard with the work that she did do, hence getting very into poetry, feminist theory, climate science, canadian history, and cajun cooking, and making it all everyone’s problem - if Jessie has an interest you are Going to hear about it and you are Going to care. or your ass is getting beat. climate science was the one that really stuck, and Jessie joined some environmental groups, initially largely for the freely shared weed but the cause is important to her, something about being able to save something or preserve it. She’s the one that found Seth after his first overdose and she threw out every drug in the house as well as Jamie’s vape, which earned her a broken wrist from being thrown at the wall by a teenage boy who doesn’t realise his strength but would probably have done it even if he knew that would happen. Jessie is the only one to speak plainly to Seth about his addiction, and she’s the one that convinces him to accept Wymack’s offer. Matt is terrified of her.

Michael (19) and Jamie are twins (non-identical so what’s the point of all that nonsense really) but Michael is the quieter of the two. this isn’t to say he isn’t still a primary actor in any gordon sibling shenanigans, it just means he’ll sit thoughtfully in the corner while the others debate whether a chainsaw or punching is the quickest way to take down the fence before he gets up and drives the big sit on lawnmower right at and through the fence. Michael is very bright in a way that’s overlooked by his teachers because he isn’t particularly enthusiastic, but he would like to study more if he got the chance. Seth used to make Michael and Jamie be defenders if he was practicing exy out the back of the house, but this just meant giving them motorbike helmets and diy body armour (bbq lid duct taped to chest) and running at them full force. Michael would just kind of let this happen because he knew Seth would beat him in a fight if he said no, but resisted enough that Seth realised a bribe would be necessary if he wanted Michael to actually participate, so brought him books (as recommended by the elderly local librarian Seth had been flirting relentlessly with)

Jamie (19) would be easy to write off as a moron, but it’s actually just that he genuinely enjoys a lot of stupid shit. makeshift exy was his favourite- he didn’t know or care what a backliner was but he got to chase Seth with a stick and slam him to the ground. he went through a bit of a skater boy twat phase (think like a young carl gallagher with a vaping problem and a skateboard) where he mostly just hung out with dickheads that only really ended when a girl in his class was so unbelievably vicious to him about it (justifiably) that he changed his ways and also decided he was in love with her. it will never work because his idea of a fun date would be tasering each other in a car park then shooting fireworks at each other and hers is. well not that

Scotty (16) also responds to ‘cuck boy’: having eight older siblings who have all heard the song “Scotty doesn’t know” is basically a death sentence RIP Scotty. Scotty is so much younger than the rest of them that he’s kind of living in a whole different genre- Seth is on his whole college sports underdog thing and wrestling with addiction, Jeremy coming to terms with parentification and quietly looking into CPTSD, Tabitha in her limbo of trauma, Jessie determined to save the world because she can’t save anything in front of her, Ricky in the fast and furious franchise driving fast enough that he never has to think too hard about why he needs the adrenaline, while Scotty likes science but wants to be a musician and is finding this to be the primary source of inner conflict in his life. He’s a sweet kid who barely knows Rebecca and drags Ricky to most of his parent-teacher conferences (his teachers, horrified, try to end it quickly, having survived him and come to consensus that Ricky Gordon was the worst student they’ve ever had. Scotty knew that and it’s why he chose Ricky), and hands out flyers and demo CDs for his band around the city centre.

I’ve also decided in the socmed au that Seth didn’t die but that overdose did still happen and he was hospitalised and in and out of a coma for the rest of the season, and given that his contract with PSU was five years on the team, he’s redoing his senior year.

[nemesis-writer]

Five Minutes (Chapter 4)

Masterlist Utter Silence TW: mentions of blood, mental illness

No one knew who was next. They all guarded the streets to check any odd behaviours. Tim was in charge of security systems, and everyone changed the streets they looked after every hour.

But what they didn't know is that all business was being held beneath the ground they walked so gladly upon.

At the base...

"We need to hurry up. Now" I commanded as I watched my men place the traps and riddles all over Gotham.

Me and Michael were sitting together on the couch of our library just enjoying the silence with each other until one of us broke the ice.

(Italics are Reader's)

"This will work darling. Don't worry"

"I know, I'm just scared of losing you"

"You could never lose me. Even when I go to hell, I'm gonna drag your pretty ass down there with me."

"Why?"

"Because I love you, and I'd do anything for you."

"Even if it means I have to kill my family?"

"I would make a monument of all their heads for you."

"Ti amo di piu mi amore"

"Ti amo bambola"

At the Wayne mansion...

The silence engulfed the very walls where fighting, or excitement was being heard. Even the smallest pin drop could be heard around the gothic walls.

No one knows when nor how the riddles shall come.

And no one knows who's next.

There are many crimes that are to be attended to, but the more criminals they kill, the higher the chances are of exploitation.

Blood flows, and breathing could only be heard. No one could talk, breathe, or blink without the fear of possible death.

Jason has died once before, and he assumed that death wouldn't scare him anymore, but with all the tricks and casualities that are bound to happen, he fears of watching other innocents suffer.

"Who do you think is next?" Duke asked.

"Probably Tim or something", Jason muttered

"It's your fault she's like this", Damian said.

"Our fault? Let me just remind you, who beat her and made her life a living hell." Jason retorted

"Settle dow-" Bruce said until he was cut off.

"I will not calm down because our sister, and might I add, your daughter has left us because of what we did" Jason yelled.

"Did you even noticed how much she tried to go to you, any of you? I died for a year, and I was sent to multiple missions, so I'm not the one at fault here." Jason added.

Jason fears what you'd become, he loves you and could never want to let go of the one person that was supposed to be the best of them. The balance. The truth in their pit of lies, and the light of their impenetrable darkness.

But yet, you've became worse than them.

No.

You've became better than they ever were. You are born brilliant, hot, bad, and really mad. You relish in others sufferings whilst Jason, tries to prevent them. You're the cause of everything they have tried to stop.

And that's what Jason truly feared in you. You had followed the five stages of grief:

denial

anger

bargaining

depression

acceptance

Well what's the harm of adding one more? Revenge...

A/N: Cruella warning lol, I'm a bit busy so I didn't really updated, but I hope you like this.

Taglist

@lunayaps, @not-aya, @iluvcatzz, @vanessa-boo, @ivyrose9194,@thesehandsarerated-e, @eyeless-kun, @errorunfound1, @gwyneveire, @alishii, @cxcillia

[ginawankenobi]

A Comprehensive Guide to All the Characters on Lost, Ranked (by me, obviously) - Part One: From Bad to Neutral

Do I need a disclaimer? Needless to say, these are my opinions and my opinions only. I am not the Supreme Authority on Which Characters are Best (though if you want to appoint me as such, I won't complain about it, lmao). If you feel differently than I do, polite and thoughtful commentary is always welcome, and I would encourage you to make your own list so we can compare! Anyway, I think that’s enough. Let’s get to ranking!

This doesn’t cover EVERY character, but it’s pretty dang close. Also, warning, this is LONG. There are a LOT of characters in this show…I kind of forgot that tiny detail until I started doing this, and by that point I was in too deep, so here we are. Don’t worry, I think I made it entertaining, if you feel inclined to indulge me and read it all.

All the way at the bottom of the list, we begin in

The 10th Circle of Hell (Because the 9th One Just Isn’t Deep Enough).

One of the main themes of the show is duality, which is why I have Jacob & the MIB up a level from here (more on that in a sec), but these people (again, in my opinion) are just irredeemable pieces of garbage. The Worst of the Worst. In no particular order:

Susan Lloyd. I don’t know what happened to make her such a miserable garbage person, but I don’t really care, either. Keeping Michael from Walt and the way she went about everything was fucking evil. Michael may not have been perfect, but he wanted to be in his kid’s life, and he deserved a million times better than what she gave him. Being Walt’s mom is the only good thing she ever did, but even that won’t come close to redeeming her in my eyes. At least karma came around for her in the end. Burn in hell.

Anthony Cooper. Do I even need to explain this? Zero redeeming qualities, zero remorse for anything he ever did, actual sociopath. Burn in hell.

Charles Widmore, you selfish, arrogant, stupid man-child. You can argue that he has duality if you want, oh he loves his daughter, he loves Eloise, blah blah blah. No he doesn’t and I don’t care. He doesn’t know what love means. Selfish little boy who learns nothing and only exists to make others miserable. Burn in hell.

Martin Keamy. Dickhead sociopathic probably former frat bro who gets off on hurting people and being in charge of hurting people. Burn in hell.

Woo-Jung Paik. Learns nothing, cares about no one. I truly despise that he probably wound up helping raise Ji Yeon, and then he probably got his fucking company back as well. I hate it and I hate him. Sun and Jin deserved to escape the island and raise their child themselves. Burn in hell.

Wayne Janssen is self explanatory; an abusive asshole who definitely would have also assaulted Kate given any opportunity. Disgusting individual. Am I upset Kate wasn’t a little smarter about what she did? Perhaps. Am I mad he’s dead? Nah. (So many dads on this show suck SO much, I think the writers had some mega unresolved daddy issues, tbh.) Burn in hell.

Sabrina Carlyle, you HEINOUS hag. Shannon was still a child when she lost her dad, she was a literal teenager trying to figure her shit out, and you basically told her to go fuck herself because you thought YOU deserved to keep ALL her dad’s money on top of the millions you already have, and Shannon deserved to be cut off with NOTHING because she was kind of wishy-washy and didn’t know what she wanted to do for the rest of her life at 18? Look, I understand wanting her to work for stuff and not just be handed everything, but FOR FUCK’S SAKE, how disgusting and cruel can you be? “Oh, your dad didn’t leave a will.” BULLSHIT. (I get kind of defensive over my faves, forgive me.) Burn, you guessed it, in hell.

Slightly above them in Satan’s Armpit, we have:

Yes, I am putting the MIB and Jacob on the same level, and it’s not the lowest one. They’re brothers, cut from the same cloth, blah blah etc. There are REASONS the island needed Hurley, things needed to be different. Like come on Jakey, did you really need to go through such a rigmarole to pick a freakin’ successor? I don’t think so. I mean, in the end it got us the Losties all together and stuff, but at what cost? It’s not like Jacob had any idea how any of that would turn out. Meanwhile, he let Ben do all his Ben shit, and let his smoke monster brother kill all kinds of people for no reason while he just went on being Mr. Mysterious “I-Never-Show-My-Face-Or-Actually-Explain-Stuff-To-People-Even-Though-I’m-Trying-To-Recruit-Them-To-Take-My-Job” …whatever, man. The MIB is here for obvious reasons. Selfish, doesn’t care who he hurts or kills to get what he wants, of course, he’s the obvious evil of this show. Still, there is duality there, and for that I am putting him in this tier. I can empathize with thinking Jacob’s an ass, lmao.

Roger Linus. I certainly empathize with him regarding the loss of his wife, that’s devastating, however, it is not an excuse to abuse your child. It was not Ben’s fault (for once, lol). I’m not saying Ben was right to kill him either, of course, but I certainly understand his reasons and how he was pushed to the decisions he made.

Phil. I loathe and detest this slimy doofus, and it all boils down to one thing: He Hit Juliet. I fully and completely understand James’s rage when he did that. The visceral reaction I have as an observer who knows these characters are fictional and loves Juliet is bad enough, so I can definitely believe the man who’s in love with her would LITERALLY want to kill him for doing that. There are other reasons, of course, he’s annoying and thinks he’s much smarter than he is and all that, but those reasons aren’t as important to me. (You’ll notice treatment of Juliet is quite a deciding factor throughout this list, lmfao.)

Stuart Radzinsky. Just an ass, to be honest. Unpleasant as fuck, doesn’t care who he hurts as long as he gets to do his little sciencey stuff. Oh yeah, and he rats out Suliet. So. BYE!

Brian Porter. Honestly being married to Susan is reason enough to put you here, but then you also went and threw Walt away like a used Kleenex. Fuck you, Brian.

Thomas (Claire’s baby daddy) is an asshat. Seriously. YOU insisted she keep the baby, made all these promises, and then got all pissy when it was time to talk and think about stuff for the baby? Fuck you. Grow up, Peter Pan.

Subcategory: They Who Hath Drinketh the Kool-aid (& Therefore I Cannot Respect Them)

Danny & Colleen Pickett. It’s clear they think they’re a power couple, but in reality they’re just weirdos with anger issues and a superiority complex.

Bea Klugh. Seriously, lady, you sacrificed your life for what? Citation not found.

Mikhail Bakunin. Again, you killed people and sacrificed yourself for…?

Ethan Rom. You know what you did.

Isabel. You’re useless. What even was the point of you, “Sheriff” who knows Chinese for some reason?

Goodwin Stanhope. You win a couple points for being nice to Juliet and trying to leave your wife for her (cause let’s be honest, who wouldn’t), but you still drank it, man.

Harper Stanhope. You’re just kind of a miserable person. Byeeee.

Adam. You beefed with Juliet and called her “Julie.” Ew.

Cindy Chandler. Pawn. “We’re here to watch.” Watch what? Watch Juliet get sentenced to death and executed. Go fuck yourself, Cindy. You’re lucky the execution didn’t actually happen, or you’d be in Hell Circle 10.

Zoe. Pawn.

Seamus. Pawn.

Omar. Pawn.

Ryan Pryce. Pawn.

Aldo. Pawn.

The rest of the Others we see glimpses of, like Burditt, Justin, Luke, Jason, etc.

Next, we have the You’re Not The Worst, But I Dislike You More than I Like You category:

Tom Friendly is in this category because despite myself, I kinda like the guy. He has a sense of humor and a flair for the dramatic, and he’s a far more interesting character than most of the other Others. He’s not higher in the ranks because well, Kool-aid drinker.

Cassidy Phillips. Look, I know James did her wrong, but she just sorta bothers me. I feel a kind of pick-me energy that I can’t fully explain, and I don’t enjoy it. I do think her relationship with Kate is the most interesting thing about her, and I definitely could see that ship sailing once Kate returned from the island.

Sarah Wagner (formerly Shephard) kind of gets a pass because Jack definitely had his issues, but did you NEED to cheat on him? I don’t think so. Also, being mad that he always wants to fix things after you literally married him BECAUSE he fixed a thing is a little nuts, I’m just saying.

Emily Locke did it with one of the worst people in history, but it produced John so at least there’s that, I guess. She’s got some severe mental illness(es), which Cooper undoubtedly exploited, so I can’t place a ton of blame on her. Still, she needs some serious help.

Nikki & Paulo. I’ll lump them together because that’s what the show did. In all honesty, they were just kind of unnecessary, but I don’t hate them.

Ed Mars is an obsessive man, one might say. Truthfully, he’s just trying to do his job. Kate legitimately is a premeditated murderer on the run, what’s he supposed to do? Does he get a little carried away? Yes. Is he wrong? Not really. Still don’t love the guy, but he’s not The Worst.

Kelvin Inman is here for his treatment of Desmond, trying to sneak off and leave him. Sorry, bro. He’s a relatively decent dude otherwise.

Liam Pace. Look, I fully respect that he went and got clean and got his shit together, I do, but selling Charlie’s piano was a DICK move.

Nathan…you just didn’t help yourself at ALL, man. If you gave even a smidgen of kindness to literally anyone, they wouldn’t have been so quick to believe you were an Other.

Mrs. Paik is here because she’s married to Satan’s spawn. She’s not lower on the list because she genuinely cares for Sun and Ji Yeon.

Right in the middle we have the “I Don’t Have Any Reason to Hate You, But I Don’t Really Have Any Reason to Like You Either” group. These are characters we don’t get to know very well, or that I just feel kind of neutral about.

I’ll group up the crash survivors here, so Joanna Miller, Gary Troup, Beth, Donald, the other tailies, and captain Seth Norris. We hardly knew ye. Literally.

Ilana, I’m sorry girl, I don’t really care that much about you. It feels a little like she was just thrown in to have an extra female character (cough, in the absence of Juliet, cough). She’s fine, she’s okay, I just don’t really have any personal attachment to her at all.

Matthew Abaddon and Eloise Hawking represent true neutral alignment to me. They don’t really get involved or invested, they just make sure the pieces are in the proper place.

Diane Janssen is here because she kind of evens out for me. She was stuck in an abusive relationship and couldn’t find the strength to leave, which I empathize with, but it caused her to make some shitty decisions that affected her daughter. I believe she was justified in her anger towards Kate, but wrong to try and blackmail her into seeing Aaron, though she wound up not following through with that and doing the right thing after all. It kind of all balances out, in my opinion, and I neither like nor dislike her, really.

Bonnie and Greta kind of drank the Kool-aid, but Bonnie used her final moments to defy Ben, and I can appreciate that.

Carole and Lindsay Littleton, we don’t get to know them much, but I appreciate how much Claire loves her mom and how Lindsay was protective of them when it came to Christian.

Danielle’s expedition party members. Rest in…well, pieces, if you’re Montand. Sorry.

Pierre and Lara Chang. Though Pierre is a bit of a grump, he’s not a bad dude overall, and Lara was fine as well.

Lennon and Dogen again sort of fall into the duality category where they even out. They drank that sweet Kool-aid, but there’s a little more to them than meets the eye. At the end of the day though, I just don’t have any strong feelings about them.

Richard Malkin did his best to steer Claire in the right direction, for whatever reason. But did it mean anything or not? The world may never know.

Carmen Reyes is a good mom, she made Hurley so she gets points for that, but she’s just middle of the road for me.

Dan Norton is a dude doing his job.

Tricia Tanaka, how did you not see that meteor coming, girl? Just kidding, she deserved better, but again, we don’t know her very well.

People we see mostly in passing: Regina, Nurse Lazenby, Rosie, Olivia, Chrissy, Jill

Part two will be on the way soon! (And it will probably be longer than this part 😅) Stay tuned!

[moonempire]

AOT The Office AU

So I've been rewatching the office for probably the 4th time (it's too good) and I just keep thinking of the AOT cast in a similar scenario. Of course since Jean is my obvious favourite he'd be the jim-esque character, Levi and Stanley have similar personalities (maybe Angela too). Hange and Meredith. Erwin is so Michael Scott coded and Floch maybe some Andy vibes. I mean it kind of wouldn't fit perfectly but I want to give my vison ago:

So here we go Sales associate Jean x receptionist reader + overall

Headcanons: .Okie so obviously he finds random reasons to come up to your desk .doesn't say a word when he gets there just stares at you until you give him attention .shares a desk clump with Marco and Floch .used to be with Connie and Sasha too but those two had to get separated. Floch used to work down at the warehouse but levelled up and now Sasha sit with Historia and Ymir who keep her in check good cop bad cop style. Respectively. And Connie sits all by himself like the bad kid in a classroom. .Levi personally set up a desk for him, but its only caused Connie to wonder about from time to time .another desk clump is Reiner, Berthold and Annie, most of the noise coming from there is Reiner. Unfortunately it's sometimes weeping because a deadline is coming up and he's still got loads to do .sometimes Berthold has panic attacks when documents go missing .Poor Annie is basically a caretaker for both of them, to the point Erwin official made her the middle manager of their little department and gave her a raise .Down at the warehouse is Zeke (who Eren denied relation too for a long time) Porco, Marcel, Yelena (who Erwin thought was a really lanky guy for the first two weeks of her employment)and Colt whose still fairly new. Miche is in charge and does not give a shit and cause him and Erwin go way back when, so, he gets away with it. . Miche and Zeke do not get along at all, onetime they were both sent home for having a fight on the parking lot. Bets were placed, popcorn was made and there were tears. .They constantly have to kick Hange out, whose always doing dodge stuff down there. Nobody really knows what but they always emerge from the nook they've made for themselves with mysterious stains Hange Levi and Erwin are all Heads of department. Accounting, HR, and Sales respectively. Erwin and Levi share an office for god knows what reason and Hange likes to switch up desks every now and then. .Levi and Erwin did NOT get along at the start, sometimes they still don't.

Little Jean Scenario: so like I said Jean has a fat crush on you (the still fairly new receptionist). So it's one of those days where he comes up to your desk and just stares at you but you're actually busy proof reading a bunch of documents for Levi cause he didn't have time to do them himself. You look up at Jean with an exasperated look and sigh "What do you want now?" in a rather unamused tone, which he's not used to at all and mutters "Nothing" with a little pout and goes back to his desk. Unfortunately for him, Eren was going to make some copies at the exact moment and Connie was having one of his wonders about so both of his "biggest fans" had seen the awkward encounter. The pair circle behind him to his desk with massive grins on their faces, which Floch can't help but miss so pulls his face out of his screen

"Trouble in paradise?" Connie teases first, to which Jean grimaces at putting his glasses on and looking at his screen at nothing in particular. He would have been able to handle your tone no problem; the three Cheshire cats stood and sat around him are making it it impossible. "Oh look at him he's sulking." Eren adds "Did you get kicked out the bedroom Jean" Floch snorts which earns him three glares that scream "no one invited you". "Aww Jean come on now don't ignore us" Connie says poking the back of Jeans head. All this teasing is unbeknownst to you since you're having a hard time on the documents and Levi keeps poking his head out of his office to see if your done yet. In fact you hadn't even clocked the slight harshness in your tone when addressing Jean. Around half an hour later you knock on Levi and Erwin's office to return the proof read paper. Levi takes them from your hands then looks up at you.

"Can you check on Kirschtein for me" he asked in a stoic tone then mutters "Before he has another tantrum" before rolling his eyes and returning to his office. Levi had noticed Jean's sulky mood for the last half hour but didn't have time to tell him to "pull his socks up" like he normally does. So he unknowingly sent you to go resolve the little spat (as Jean's mind has now blown it up to be) with the now very moody salesman. So you do as you your told and go check on him "I'm fine" he replies not hiding the huff that escaped his throat then adjusting his glasses. "I never noticed you wore glasses." you say to him with an intrigued smile bring your face to align with his for a better look. His narrowed eyes catch your curious wide ones and he can't help but match. "I ran out of contacts, need to reorder." he says in the same tone but this time minus the huff. "They suit you, you should wear them more often" you tell him with sincerity or so he hears. The truth is most of the time when you speak to him it's how co workers (that perhaps like each other) talk to each other. But Jean's ears can't help but pick up every letter, every work, sentence and amplify the slight emotion behind it. "Good to know." he answers with a very small smile God, how could he have been so upset, he thinks to himself. You probably had no idea that you'd used that tone with him, you clearly didn't mean it he realises with the gentle conversation occurring. All his moodiness washes away and he sits up straight. "I don't think I've worn glasses since high school." he tells you feeling alot better. "Oh my god really, I have to see a picture." you giggle at the stroy he begins to tell. You lean on his desk for once while he's the one sitting looking up at you. You stay there until Levi pops out his offcie with more documents to proof read.

Ahh i love the office sm!!!! Also i don't think this is exactlyh what i wrote last time but hopefully its better :))

[4evacrazy]

I was thinking, Danneel seriously must be so jealous of Jensen and his career compared to hers. I mean I know Jensen's not an A list celebrity, but I don't believe he wants to be. Supernatural is successful show that has a big fan base and lasted 15 seasons. Jensen was one of the leads on the show alongside Jared. Since supernatural ended, he might not have had steady work, but he's still working and has connections and friends to help him, I mean he's got lots of projects lined up and has the boys, so he's doing ok. He's also able to travel around the country and world going to conventions with lots of fans who love him. Now when I look at Danneel's situation, she clearly wanted to be famous and have successful career and there's nothing wrong with that. But clearly she hasn't got what it takes. That's not me being mean, it is what it is. Her career peaked when she was a supporting character on one tree hill. It wasn't even that good. But when people think of one tree hill they think of chad Michael Murray, Sofia bush and Hillerie. No one remembers a side character. Then after that ended she tried and failed, got a few minor roles, while Jensen continued as one of the leads on supernatural with a strong fan base. She then used Instagram to keep herself in the limelight. Using her kids and Jensen to get attention. God knows why any celeb would not protect their small children's identities. I honestly believe she got pregnant with the twins behind his back to stop him from leaving her. Then she got onto supernatural as a pointless forgettable character. They had no chemistry on-screen. After supernatural ended, the Winchesters was her way of trying to brand her and Jensen as a power couple with her in charge. That's why Jared was left out of it because she would have got no attention as it wasn't even her show. That failed, she tried some terrible modelling and the jewellery thing, again failed. So where's that left her. Rattling around in a big massive house on her own while her husbands continues to get work and travel and spend every opportunity to get away from her.

If I didn't dislike the woman so much I'd pity her. This is probably why she can't bring herself to make one nice comment about her husband and why she constantly puts him down, because she's bitter and jealous of him. I really hope she doesn't show up to more conventions as it's seems she can't do anything else. Its sad really that she doesn't see that you don't have to be famous and rich to be successful. Money can't buy you happiness.

[avaritia-apotheosis]

Danny ends his first month as Bruce Wayne's PA being held at gunpoint.

This is not the first time he's been in this position, and lord knows with his luck it probably won't be the last. But this is the first time he's ever been held at gunpoint by a regular gun. As in one that fires bullets and has gunpowder, as opposed to the ecto-charged weapons back in Amity. The novelty of the situation makes him hesitate for longer than he usually would. An ecto gun would hurt like a bitch, sure, but he knew he was strong enough to tank it. But a bullet between the eyes? He's not sure how that would affect him considering, well, him, and he's really not in any hurry to figure that out.

The guy in the Michael Myers mask holding him hostage— one of six, all wearing horror movie villain masks probably taken from some local Party City—yelled at Danny to put his hands behind his head. "I know you!" Michael Myers said. "You're Wayne's dog aren't'cha?"

Danny rolled his eyes. He shoots Tiffany, one of the front desk clerks, an exasperated look. God forbid people actually call Danny by his job title.

Tiffany shrugs as best as she could from the ground.

"I'm his PA, asshole," Danny snapped.

"Why you—"

"Oh just shut the fuck up!" Scream, well, screams. "He's just some punk kid. The cops will be here any minute, and we still don't know where the fuck Wayne is."

In the most innocent way Danny could manage (and by innocent, he means the most annoyingly straight face he could pull) Danny says, "Do you have an appointment?"

Tiffany face palms. Scream blue-screens. "What."

"Do you have an appointment?" Danny stalled, straining his senses for any sign of the Bat. Really, it shouldn't take Bruce this long to respond. They were literally in his building. "Anyone that wants to see Mr. Wayne needs an appointment."

Michael Myers fumes. "Yeah, I do. It's under do what we say, or I put a bullet in your teeth!"

Danny tilted his head just so. Was that footsteps he heard overhead?

"Interesting name." Danny made a show of pulling out the palm-sized planner he kept in his breast pocket and flipped to today's date. "Is it foreign?"

He made it a habit to keep a physical copy of his boss' agenda as a back-up in case something happened to his work phone. (See: Vlad messing up the work phone he bought Danny after Danny purposefully squeezed in a month's worth of work into one week). If Danny wasn't so sure that Michael "trigger happy" Myers wouldn't shoot Danny's fancy new work phone, he'd have pulled that out instead and called an ambulance for these poor bastards.

"I am going to enjoy hurting you."

The lights overhead flickered.

Danny hissed in mock-disappointment. "Oooh, would you look at that. It looks like Mr. Wayne is fully booked. Guess you can't see him today." He batted his eye lashes, mouth widening in a shit-eating grin. "But luckily for you, it looks like there's an opening with the Batman."

The room was swallowed up by darkness.

The sound of horror villains screaming was music to Danny's ears.

[actual-changeling]

We need to talk about the Archangel Michael.

No, seriously we NEED to talk about Michael because I think she's going to be way more important than we currently think.

(quick side note: I will be jumping between pronouns for everyone involved because I go by vibes and also bc I'm trans and I like doing it. Hopefully it won't be too confusing, but I'll try to make it clear who I am talking about.)

So! Welcome back to Alex's unhinged meta corner. In accordance with the usual essay rules, let's begin with my hypothesis before we go down a long, probably very unhinged spiral.

I completely underestimated how thorough I was going to be, so to not overwhelm everyone with a miles long post, I will be dividing this meta into parts and will post them as I finish them.

A lot of small details have been fluttering around my mind over the last few weeks, and I think I am finally starting to put all the pieces together—and there are a LOT.

Part 1: Season One and Michael's Rank

We know them as one of the three (four—but that's another post) Archangels next to Gabriel and Uriel. While Gabriel's title was that of the Supreme Archangel, Michael's is explicitly stated in episode one of season two as 'duty officer', which, broadly speaking, makes them the Watcher, the one in charge in the case of Gabriel's absence for whatever reason, taking command where he can't; usually that probably meant him simply being busy and not him being unemployed and naked.

Their position is further signified by their ring, which resembles the Ophanim, the many-eyed angel wheels.

They are the one to keep a literal eye on things—they find pictures of Aziraphale and Crowley in S1 in the Observation Files, they watch over the heavenly hosts, they oversee plans, everything.

Michael even takes it a step further and (presumably created) the grapevine with hell, having direct contact to higher ranking demons such as Ligur, most likely also Dagon, and Beelzebub.

This is where we get to my theory: Michael is actively working with demons against both heaven and hell. It doesn't mean that they care about preserving earth, though they might later on, but that whatever plans heaven currently has are to be stopped.

I'm going to take this one step further and say that Michael also knew about Gabriel and Beelzebub, and helped him escape.

Now to the fun part: the evidence!

In season one, they are interested in stopping Crowley and Aziraphale from preventing the apocalypse, but that does not mean that they agree with the plans heaven has for said event—only that they need it to happen so their own agenda can stay on track. She has information she technically shouldn't, like, well, literally all the details about how, when, and what is going to go down

This is due to heaven and hell's general cooperation, which is its own post, but all of that runs through them.

That 'apparently' is doing a lot of heavy lifting here, it's the basic and plausible deniability that's required for them to not be in trouble. She is also in charge of ORGANIZING the troops, fulfilling her role as a navigator.

On top of that, the way she talks to Ligur highly mirrors the way two covert operatives might talk to one another, using phrases like 'our man' and 'working for you'. The mere assumption Michael makes here, that Aziraphale could be a spy, implies that there ARE already spies and angels working for hell.

Consorting with the enemy is allowed as long as it is done within a very specific framework, so Michael and Ligur are free to do so, while Aziraphale and Crowley are working outside of it, which gives heaven & hell the basis to punish them for it.

I think the phrasing of this sentence is also quite interesting.

Not "time to come back to heaven" or anything along the lines that takes Aziraphale's ethereal status into account, no, she simply says he needs to 'choose sides'—and who is to say that he needs to choose heaven or that heaven and hell are the only sides one can choose? Additionally, Michael is the one to bring the holy water to hell while they send one of the Erics, and while the trial as a whole holds a certain tension, there does not seem to be any open animosity between him and the dukes of hell.

In short, Michael is working with hell behind the scenes, likely pursuing their own goals, and standing in opposition to heaven.

Moving on to season two, and here it gets REALLY fun.

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5

(hopefully it will just be five. it was supposed to be two. then three. but here we are)

[fuckingyrs]

The sound of a body throwing itself onto one of the infirmary cots echoed through the mostly empty room, followed closely behind with a dramatic, but melodic sigh. “Can I say something mean?” 

“Probably not in front of the baby.”

Will groaned, looking up from his pile of patient reports he had been sorting for the past… year. “I hardly think eleven still counts as being a baby.”

Lee, who had been refilling first aid kits for the past two hours, contemplated this for a moment. “Maybe, but that’s besides the point. I’m six years older than you. You’ll always be a baby.”

“I’m going to say something mean. Will, cover your ears.”

“I’m not covering my ears, Taylor. Unlike you, I’m working right now and I need my hands.”

“Oh,” Taylor dragged, a taunt evident in her voice, "someone's grumpy.”

“He’s mad I put him on infirmary duty during arts and crafts.”

“Will, you aren’t good at arts and crafts.” Lee slapped her arm. “And you like working in the infirmary, you are constantly taking my shifts. It’s why I love you.”

Lee slapped her arm again. “Taylor, what the heck.”

Taylor groaned, “Fuck. Just say fuck. I’m begging you.”

“That’s besides the point. I had it with Cecil. We were going to finish our board game.” Will turned to Lee, pointing an accusing finger at him, “You knew this.”

Lee let out a long-suffering sigh and Will almost felt bad for causing a fuss, but really, Lee brought this upon himself. “Taylor, stop pawning off your shifts to Will. Will, stop letting Taylor’s pawn off her shifts to you. Also: I’m sorry about arts and crafts. The last few days have been hectic and I needed your help. I’ll make sure to not schedule you over arts and crafts next week.”

“I’m going to be home next week! Mama is picking me up, remember?”

Lee had the decency to look ashamed when he said, “Heck. I forgot. I’m sorry, Will.”

Taylor got up from her self-designated cot and walked over to Will, ruffling his hair once she was close enough. “I’ll take over the rest of your shift, buddy. You go have fun.”

Will shook his head, “No, it’s okay. I’m already here. Arts and crafts is half-way done anyway. We wouldn’t be able to finish.”

“If you’re sure,” Taylor sighed as she pressed a kiss to his forehead and Will let out a cry of protest because he could feel the lipstick stain there. He tried rubbing it away with his fingers but by the look on Lee’s face and the snickers Taylor was making behind him, he only made it worse.

Lee graciously handed Will a wipe before glaring at their sister. “Taylor, what are you even doing here?”

“I think I made that pretty obvious when I threw myself onto a bed and stated I was gonna say something mean. I came to gossip.”

“You should be at archery right now.”

“Mike was being a piss-baby. He wouldn’t let Josh and I try to hit one another. What’s the point of being in advanced archery if you can’t shoot at your brother? Moving targets!”

“So you left?”

“Yep. I found Silena and she offered to do my nails before I came by.”

Lee pinched the bridge of his nose in a way that resembled an old man at the end of his rope. Will suppressed a giggle at his brother’s anguish as Lee said, “You can’t do that.”

“Do what? My nails?”

“Leave Michael like that.”

“Why? He’s not in charge of me.”

“But I am. And he’s my second in command, so yes he is.”

Taylor groaned, flopping back onto her cot. “One, he’s like three weeks older than me, unfair. And two, none of that is important right now. What is important is that our father was here and didn’t say hi to any of us. Who does that?”

“Our father, apparently.”

Taylor flipped Lee off, showing off her new manicure. It was baby pink, like her lipstick, with a little sun in the center. “He gives those kids a ride, none of them his, and has the audacity to leave before saying hi? Hell, Will over here has never met him. He has time to bring a group of kids to camp, but can’t spare a lousy minute to check in on us? And I can’t say this to Michael or he’ll claim I’m “on the other side”.” Taylor sighed, a faraway look in her eyes. Will had only seen this look on her face a few times before: every time Luke was mentioned. “I’m just tired of feeling abandoned and I’m sick of feeling like it’s bad to think that.”

Lee stepped towards her, a soft, “Tay–” passing through his lips, before she sat up and shook herself out of her stupor.

“Instead of saying hi, he just causes chaos and disappears! He brings Percy back, which is never a good sign. Thalia is driving the sun chariot, and crashes it! Oh, and he brought that new weird kid that keeps bombarding everyone with questions.”

Will saw through the change of topic, and Lee clearly had to as well, but he allowed it to happen. He slapped her on the arm for the third time, “He’s not weird. He’s, like, eight. The kid is just excited. You were excited about camp once upon a time.”

Taylor turned to Will, jerking her head at Lee, “I think he’s finally lost it. When have I ever been excited by anything ever?”

Will grinned, “Yesterday, you beat Madi at Josh’s song quiz and you danced around the cabin for ten minutes.”

Taylor gasped loud and dramatic, clutching at her chest as she fell back onto her cot, chestnut hair falling all over her face in her fall. “William! How dare you accuse me of such things!”

[abbysimsfun]

Sims In Bloom: Generation 2 Pt. 48 (He Had Him At Hello, Bromance Edition)

Leaving her friends in Old New Henford after dark, Heather, Ash, and Conrad returned to her childhood home with her parents.

They found River and Cassandra still in their work clothes, the two having spent most of the evening trying to get their infant son to sleep. "Doctor Scott says its a phase, it'll pass, but when he doesn't sleep well, we don't sleep well," lamented River. "These days we're thrilled if he sleeps for more than two hours at a time."

Conrad already felt at ease around her siblings, and Heather left them chatting upstairs while her parents showed her the new plants in their always impressive garden. When Michael woke up fussy, she soothed him back to sleep to give his tired parents a break.

Upstairs, River studied Conrad with keen interest. His sister's taste in men had always been a little...off, and he wanted to be sure this one deserved her. "Driving between San Myshuno and Brindleton Bay must not be easy."

"We make it work," said Conrad. "We're waiting for me to get a transfer, but all that driving can be pretty tiring."

"Sometimes I dance just to keep myself awake," said Cass, grooving a little to the music. "Since I left the art studio to help my mother-in-law with her floral business, it's been a bit easier working from home. I never realized the artistry involved in floral arranging, but I can be just as creative with a bouquet of flowers as I can with a palette of acrylics!"

Conrad couldn't relate, but he empathized with their lack of sleep. "I don't know much about raising kids, but Ash likes a story I tell him that my mom used to read to me when I was a kid. The Giving Tree."

"I love that story," Cassandra mused. "I think I saw a copy at the bookstore in the square."

River nodded. "I'll try anything. I'll pick up a copy tomorrow." Despite his fatigue, River's wall crumbled as he got to know Conrad. "What made you think our sister was worth risking your career?"

The question was sincere. Conrad had asked himself the same thing a thousand times. "At first I thought it was because her son needed her more than the Landgraabs needed a win, but then they dropped the charges and I couldn't stop thinking about her. I booked a vet appointment four hours out of the way just to run into her again."

"Why didn't you ask her out, then?"

"River, stop interrogating him," Hazel pushed, but Conrad smiled.

"I wanted to, but I knew she'd been through a lot and I wanted her to be sure she was ready. I sort of knew it would be it for me if I knew she was interested."

"It's a good thing Holly intervened," said Hazel, smiling. "You might still be waiting for her, otherwise."

River grinned. "He definitely would be."

Hazel left to meet Nicola and some friends at the Gnome's Arms, and River and Cassandra finally changed and sat down to dinner. Because they could know no peace, Ash talked their ear off about dinosaurs. "Conerd say t-rex no swim, we safe," he babbled. "T-rex roar!"

"You know there were less scary dinosaurs," River said. "Smaller ones who ate plants. Also big ones. Like brontosaurus."

Ash listened with intense curiosity. "Bront-so-us?"

"Yeah, they were even bigger than your dad's apartment."

Cassandra stifled a laugh. "River, hush."

They were interrupted when Michael woke again from his nap, wailing from the bedroom. With her plate still full of food, Cass left to tend to her son as Heather walked into the kitchen. "We should probably head out. It'll still be an hour on the Simmerloop at this time of night, and we should get Ash to bed before midnight."

Cassandra brought Michael outside for their goodbyes, but the fussy infant didn't last long in the cool autumn air.

River, meanwhile, had found a new best friend in Conrad. "When I found out my sister was dating a cop I wasn't sure what to think, but now I'm pretty confident you've never played bad cop in your life."

Conrad shrugged. "I mean, I don't see the point. It doesn't get me to the truth any faster. But I admire what you and your father do. Building green infrastructure for your community is just as important as what I do."

River laughed. "Please, don't flatter me. You deal with hardened criminals like my sister."

Daisy turned to Heather as they watched River bond with Conrad. "Riv grew up with a house full of sisters, but I think he always secretly wanted a brother."

When Conrad left to get the car, River turned to Heather. "I recognize the way he looks at you, and he's not going anywhere unless you tell him to. I know you like to think you're better off single, protecting your independence, but he's the guy who's perfect for you. You and Conrad finding each other is one in a million, like the day I met Cassandra. He's your Cassandra."

(Can confirm, Jane Simsten's Soulmates mod kicked in for these two way back on the night they ran into each other with Holly and Kris in San Myshuno, but Heather's unflirty and she's been burned in the past, so it's had to be this way. I'm sorry!)

River's beautiful wife gazed at him with love while he spoke. They were so sweet together, and their love used to make Heather feel like she was missing out. Now she had Conrad, who was as close to perfect as anyone she'd ever met, and she couldn't shake her insecurities.

"I know raising Ash with his father isn't easy and you're afraid to get hurt again," River said. "But that is a guy who's waiting for you to say 'I love you' so he can say it, too."

Neal frowned. "Huck, you don't know that. Don't test your sister's emotions-"

"I do know that, and I'd die on Old Mill Hill defending that take!"

"He makes me so happy," Heather admitted. "But what if he moves in and I find out he's a criminal mastermind masquerading as a detective?"

"Then you're even more perfect for each other than I thought."

Heather couldn’t deny her feelings for Conrad, as afraid as she was to put them into words and make them real.

Despite her fears, she was grateful for her family's approval, and she embraced her brother warmly when Conrad brought his car around. ->

<- Previous Chapter | Gen 2 Start | Gen 1 Summary | Gen 1 Start

NOTE: This got it's own post because Conrad and River literally said hello to each other and were basically best friends (they became official best friends later, when it mattered for Conrad's Friend of the World aspiration. tbh by then I thought they already were but either something glitched or broke with the Lovestruck patches or I never bothered and forgot). Their instant bromance felt so right - River looks up to his older sister and wants the best for her even though he can't help but tease her, and he and Conrad are both responsible guys focused on bettering their communities. It's a perfect match and I loved this development.

[aprill-99]

EACH BRIDGERTON COUPLE AS JOHN MULANEY QUOTES:

Daphne & Simon:

Daphne: “A friend of mine asked me if I’d ever been given the sex talk, and the answer is yes… I think.”

Simon: “My father was COOOLD BLOODED.” + “Does my best friend hate me or do I just need to go to sleep?”

Kate & Anthony:

Anthony: “I’ll keep all my emotions right here and then one day, I’ll die.”

Kate: “Get out of here with your facts. Just because you’re accurate does not make you interesting.” + “I’m new in town, and it gets worse.”

Benedict & Sophie:

Benedict: “This is a healthy twenty-eight year old man trying his best.”

Sophie: “I was a maid for a while. I was treated well in my day. I worked for a variety of sirs.”

Colin & Penelope:

Colin: “My wife is a bitch and I like her soooooo much.”

Penelope: “We spend most of our time proving to people that we are who we say we are. Think about that for 10 seconds and tell me you don’t want to walk into the ocean.” + “People say crazy things all the time. And those things mean nothing to them, but they mean everything to me.”

Phillip & Eloise:

Eloise: “Thirteen year olds will make fun of you, but in an accurate way.”

Philip: “It was like, you know one of those days where you just go ‘this might as well happen.’”

Michael & Francesca:

Francesca: “I try to stay optimistic, but I will admit, things are getting pretty sticky.”

Michael: “We don’t get better than this. It’s just going to be worse versions of me from here on out.” + “And if you think I seem unlikable or out of control in that story, then just remember, that’s one I was willing to tell you.”

Hyacinth & Gareth:

Hyacinth: “Well none of us ever really know our fathers…… Anyway-”

Gareth: “I am very small. And I have no money. So you can imagine the kind of stress I am under.”

Lucy & Gregory:

Gregory: “I do hear you, and I also don’t want to be doing what I’m doing.”

Lucy: “In terms of instant relief, canceling plans is like heroine.”

Lady Danbury & Lord Ledger:

Lady Danbury: “Shut up you’re all going to die! Street smarts!” + “It’s wrong to make fun of people, but it’s just so fun sometimes.”

Lord Ledger: “My vibe is like ‘hey you could pour soup in my lap and I’d probably apologize to you.’”

George & Charlotte:

King George: “it seems like everyone, everywhere, is super mad about everything, all the time.”

Queen Charlotte: “I simply do not give a shit what anybody thinks of me in any situation.”

Bonus:

Violet: “Putting a thirteen year old in charge of your younger kids is like getting a dog to babysit your horse. If something goes wrong, they can just maybe get help a little more quickly.”

[werehale]

I want to talk about the Teen Wolf siblings, particularly their age differences.

Brett is a freshman in season 4. We don’t know how old Lori is, but later she says Brett only accepted the scholarship at Devenford if they would accept her as well. This means either Devenford includes some middle school as well as high school, Lori was smart enough to skip a grade or two, Brett and Lori are 9 months apart, or they’re twins. It’s also possible she’s a couple years younger and was only recently accepted, but since he bargained for her from the beginning, I don’t think it’s as likely.

Based on the short audio clips from “Motel California” it sounds like Boyd and Alicia were close in age, both pretty young, but when we see her body she looks a little older. I would assume he’s older since he was in charge of watching her.

Malia and Kylie were close in age based on the framed photo in her room. In “Ghosted” Kylie has mysteriously aged from about 7 to about 12. Though this is likely due to forgetting information and not caring enough to fact check their own work.

The same could be said for Theo and Tara. They seem to be close in age, but the actresses playing Tara look like different ages. I would guess in season 5 flashbacks she was 11 or 12 when Theo was 9, but in season 6 she looks 17.

Isaac is 16 in season 2 and Camden would have been 24. There is a discrepency unless I’m missing something. Since season 2 is early in the year I’m willing to bet Camden would be 25 later in the year. If Isaac is 16 and Camden would be 24, that’s an 8 year gap. But if he graduated in 2006, he was born in 1988 and is approximately 6 years older. There’s no concrete evidence of when either of their birthdays are, so perhaps Isaac’s birthday is before Camden’s and there’s a short period of time the gap is 7 years. The calendar puts his birthday in February.

Kate said that growing up Chris always tried to make her look like the bad guy.  In 3B Chris says he was 18-years-old 24 years ago putting Chris’s birth year about 1969. Kate was born in 1983. That is a 14 year gap. Either she exaggerated or lied, which I would believe, or Chris was an incredibly shitty brother, which I would also believe. Could you imagine 17 year old Chris blaming 3 year old Kate for him coming home late one night or breaking their mom’s favorite vase?

We don’t know how old Gerard is. Alexander was 27 when he died. Alexander was 19/20 years older than Chris, so Gerard was probably in his early to mid twenties when Chris was born. A lot of actors’ ages coincide with their character’s approximate age. Michael Hogan was born in 1949, so if Gerard is around his age, he’s 20 years older than Chris and 34 years older than Kate. But then he would one year older than Alexander. Not impossible, but he is likely older.

Hayden is about 16 in season 5 because she can drive. The youngest a cop can be is 20, so at the very least Clark is 4 years older. It sounds like Clark had been her guardian for a while, so the gap is likely larger.

If we are going to believe the “In Memorium” video from MTV, Laura was born in 1982 and Peter was born in 1976. We never actually know how old Derek is. Jeff said his ID, putting his birthday in November 1988, was fake, but why? What is the significance of it being fake? It served no purpose and I think Jeff just wanted to fuck with us. Especially because it’s not canon in the show, he said it outside of the show. And if we believe the calendar that makes Derek a Christmas baby, why would he make himself only a month and a half older?

I’m going to assume Derek was “with” Kate leading up closely to the fire, meaning late 2004. If Derek was 16, or almost 16 if his birthday is Christmas, that would put his birthday in 1988. So in the pilot he’s 22. In the script he was meant to be 19 but then he was aged up because Jeff thought it was more important to traumatize him than find a way around it. In 3A Cora says she’s 17, which would put them at a 5 year gap. Laura is 6 years older than Derek and 11 years older than Cora. And if Cora was 11 by January of 2005, she was born in 1993.

I don’t know if this is canon or fanon that Talia raised Peter. Regardless, he is about 5 years older than Laura, 12 years older than Derek, and 17 years older than Cora. But Talia would have to be at the youngest 8 years older than Peter, and that’s if she had Laura at 13. In “Visionary” she appears to be about mid-forties. If this is within a year of the fire, then Peter is 26/27. The gap between Peter and Talia could range from 8 to 20 years.

I’m just so interested in these dynamics.

[officialgleamstar]

ive been taking some haphazard character notes on the wyrdwood PCs for my own reference (mainly was trying to figure willowfine out, lol), and i figured i would share my observations for any other fan writers who has been struggling with characterization :] these notes arent in any particular order, not even in chronological order of me adding them, just kind of random XD

obviously i am not Word Of God, these are just my interpretations of what we've seen!! ive been of the opinion that capturing somebody's way of speaking is more useful than their personality ultimately, but i'm bad at explaining my observations for that, so i guess ignore that i said that and just read my personality notes hfkhdkjhfgfkdg and also, spoilers warning for up to episode three

Cressida

Wizard: Quite smart, had to learn her magic

Learned magic from her family, mostly used to prevent robbers at their family bank

Lawful evil confirmed :]

Haughty and spoiled, judgmental

SNARKY. INSTIGATOR. (affectionate)

However, lied and said that Robin’s “wine” was alright

Self-confessed as nosy, and is quite observant

Likes wine, fresh fruit, roasted vegetables

Easily disgusted, was alarmed by the violence in episode one, startled by the weevils in episode two

Panics easily, seems unused to hardship, and is cowardly

Ellen had to really consider if Cressida had ever been in a working kitchen before

Tries to use charisma often. Does not tend to work despite her stats

Will accumulate magic debt to not sit on mud, but has glamped!

Happen

Ranger: In tune with nature, has sprites

Sharpshooter, has a good eye and a steady hand

Very trusting, probably sheltered

Places a lot of faith in his goddess, believes in fate

Praise Cadence!

The only thing that he has to begrudgingly be okay with is his sprites getting captured

A little freak. Actually a pretty big freak.

Obsessive, gets attached easily

Doesn’t get upset, really, even when people are rude to him

Doesn’t think much about consequences, or perhaps isn’t meant to care

Very soft voice, a bit scratchy

Just kind of says things, very little filter

Lug

Barbarian: Passive-aggressive <3

SO unlucky. So so so unlucky

Very in tune with nature

Isolationist and quiet, but not bad with people (when they’re not hunting him for being a firbolg)

Doesn’t know other firbolgs

Seems naturally protective

Comes to Cressida’s aid without question, jumps out of the wagon to protect Michael and his dad whose name I cannot spell (Yophie?)

Lives in “an extremely small hovel in the woods”

Very knowledgeable, generally the most aware of what’s happening

Comes with the pass-agg of it all but he’s very grumpy, a bit mean (affectionate)

Takes the jobs he’s given quite seriously

Morven

Sorcerer: Her talent is natural, might be used to things going her way

Likes coffee. Probably more for staying awake than taste, but asks for it over other options

Does not like letting Robin take control

Inquisitive; first one to say that they should stay in Oakburn and investigate

Very stubborn, may have a problem with moving on from things

Was executed for dark magic by zealots

Immediately takes charge when given the option

Does NOT care about debt, does not think about consequences

Self-confessedly impatient. Called cranky by the others

Absolutely BRUTAL but takes care of her party members

Robin

Commoner: Just some guy

Likes honey :)

"Cress" he's so cute <3

Defensive of ostracized people, dislikes zealots

Impulsive and follows his heart, hops into conflict without much thought

Just a good guy!

A little desperate to be helpful

Does not like letting Morven take control

Distressed at the thought of murder

Easily impressed

Curious about others, starts the wagon talk in Howls In The Night

Good with kids, generally sweet to most people he meets

Willowfine

Cleric: Follows a goddess

Is open about thinking her goddess is more useful than Cadence

Strong feelings about the well-being of magic

Sweet and caring

Looked pained at having to agree that Cressida insulted Oakburn’s food

Can be blunt despite this, doesn’t mince her words

Somewhat stilted and quiet, possibly sheltered or under-socialized

Intense with her care

If she’s asked to do something, she just does it

Quick thinker, resorts to lying/acting her way out of things

From a matriarchal society

[onceuponapuffin]

Fanatic Intervention Part 14!!!

Happy Birthday to regular reader and commenter @ritz-writes !! :D

Here's the sculpture mentioned in the fic: https://noma.org/collection/history-of-the-conquest/

You'll notice that the poll at the bottom isn't anything suuuuper important. There's just some plot things that I want to get running in the next section, so I'm gonna be writing it up and posting it tomorrow. But I promise you that it's still an important choice to make (also idk what to pick so that means you all get to pick lol ).

Okay! Here we go! Back to New Orleans with The Anti-Apocalypse Crew!

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*************************

Now that you all were in the city, it only took Anathema the next morning to hone in on her signal. To Aziraphale's delight, it led you all to the sculpture garden at the New Orleans Museum of Art. To your delight, it led more specifically to a sculpture of a person riding a snail (to victory no doubt).

"I think this might be my favourite statue ever," You say aloud (because this author is assuming you would agree with her opinion). There is a person you don’t know standing in front of the statue. He gives a dissatisfied huff.

"It's called 'History of the Conquest,'" he tells you, despite not being asked, "The ever-slow and over-confident march of the entitled towards a future where they're in charge. Everyone else suffers while they promise glory and prosperity."

Your jaw drops open. This person looks like a 'surfer dude,' but is talking like someone who's spent most of their life in a cubicle changing 1s to 0s for 8 straight hours a day.

"WOW! That is BLEAK," is what finally comes out of your mouth. "Proper ray of sunshine, you are."

Okay, that sounded really British. You briefly wonder about the effect of spending so much time around Crowley and Aziraphale before Surfer Dude starts to laugh.

"I've seen a few things, human. Been 'round longer than you've been alive, will be long after you die. You're no more than a moth in my eyes."

"Wow," You can't help but repeat yourself, "Again, bleak." Also rude, but priorities.

"It is what it is," Surfer Dude replies. You shake your head and turn to Aziraphale and Crowley.

"You're up," You concede. You have no idea who this is, but he called you "human," and compared you to a moth. Whoever this person is, they’re probably the one Anathema’s had you looking for. He doesn’t look like Jesus, but maybe he will know where Jesus is. Either way, Anathema doesn’t get things wrong. If her work brought you to this person, then he’s the person you need to talk to.

That being said, whoever this is, he's the Ineffable Husbands' department and not yours. Sometimes you just gotta tap out and let the celestials handle their own kind. Now, this doesn't mean that you're not going to sit back and watch. Oh no, you want to see how this plays out.

"Can I have some popcorn?" You stage-whisper to Crowley as you pass him.

"Piss off," Crowley stage-whispers back. Despite his complaint, you notice a tiny Michael-Sheen smile on Aziraphale's face, and you return to Anathema, who looks surprised and is holding two small cartons of popcorn. You gratefully take one and have a seat on a convenient bench that is located conveniently within earshot. This is gonna be good.

"Hello," Aziraphale begins as he approaches, "I'm Aziraphale."

"Right," Surfer Dude says with a roll of his eyes, "The Angel of the Eastern Gate. I'm so honoured."

"Here I thought manners were important to angels," Crowley replies, sidling up next to Aziraphale. Surfer-Dude-Who-Is-Apparently-An-Angel takes in Crowley and raises an eyebrow.

"And here I thought demons didn't make a habit of hanging off angels' arms," Surfer Dude scoffs in in return.

Crowley snarls.

"Yes, well, each of us seems to be an anomaly in our own right," Aziraphale says with an appeasing smile, "This is Crowley. Might we have the pleasure of knowing your name?"

"No."

"Ah, right. Well, that is to your own discretion I suppose."

"Rude is what it is," sneers Crowley.

"Regardless, we've come to this garden with the guidance of our friend here, hoping to find, well, Jesus as it happens."

Surfer-Dude-Angel-Person throws his head back and laughs outright.

"You're looking for who now? JESUS? HA! Bit of soul-searching for you, is it? Spiritual journey? Pilgrimage to the Holy Land? You're in the wrong place for that!" He keeps laughing.

I mean, you get the laughter. It definitely sounds weird to a third party. Crazy even. But if this guy is an angel, then shouldn't it sound perfectly reasonable?

"Oi," Crowley interrupts, clearly impatient, "We're trying to save the world here. And since angels don't normally take holiday time, I'd think helping us might be in your best interest."

"You think you can stop the Second Coming? Ha! There isn't another technicality that you can throw around this time. This one's it. Enjoy the giant snail statues while they last, because it won't be for much longer."

"You know an awful lot," You call from the bench, "And you like to talk. So just get to the part about Jesus so we can leave you to be miserable on your own." You popcorn is already almost finished, and you frown into your carton. If only you could do miracles. You'd refill it yourself.

Surfer-Dude-Angel-Person laughs again.

"Yeah, okay, I like this one," he says, nudging a thumb in your direction. He turns away from Crowley and Aziraphale and strides towards you. Suddenly your popcorn carton is full again, so you look up. Okay, maybe he's not so bad. He reaches out a hand to you.

"Call me Sardis, Little Moth."

After a moment of hesitation, you shake his hand. He turns back to Crowley and Aziraphale.

"I can see why you've adopted this one," he says, then turns his attention to Anathema, paying no mind to the garbled protests coming from Crowley. "And since we're doing introductions...?"

"Anathema Device," says Anathema with a nod. She would probably shake his hand, but between her equipment and her popcorn, her hands are full.

"Lovely to meet you, Miss Anathema," Sardis nods at her before finally looking back at Aziraphale and Crowley. "You won't find Jesus here. But meet me for drinks later and I'll tell you what you need to know to find him."

"You're unnecessarily cryptic, Sardis," You say with a raised eyebrow and a mouth full of popcorn. He laughs again.

"Well, Little Moth," his eyes have a sparkle in them now as he looks at you, "Gotta keep myself entertained somehow."

Sardis insists on giving you all a tour of the sculpture garden, but refuses to say anything more about Jesus, or how he knows about Armageddon, or why he isn't in Heaven, or anything else that you actually WANT to talk about. He insists that such talk isn't for a quiet garden full of art. It isn't until he lays a cryptic finger beside his nose and winks at you that something clicks in your memory.

Remember, back before JK Rowling turned out to be an awful person, back when everyone read Harry Potter? EVERYONE, RIGHT?? Perhaps, dear Reader, you remember the chapter in book 5 where Hermione calls a meeting at The Hog's Head because it’s less crowded. Hermione figures the sparse crowd means that there are fewer people to see them together. Perhaps you also remember when, later in the book, this action comes back to bite them, and they are told very sternly that they should have met at the Three Broomsticks precisely BECAUSE it was busier. A busy pub meant they would have been less likely to be overheard.

Suddenly you look around the garden and notice the sparse, but very much there, collection of people. Just the right number of people that could listen to your conversation if they wanted to without you being any the wiser. Oh.

Oh.

Maybe the cryptic is a little bit necessary after all. He’s still overdoing it in your opinion, but whatever floats his goat.

You part ways after his tour, agreeing to meet at a local bar at 9pm. There’s enough time to go back to the hotel, freshen up, and get something to eat before you make your way there.

“Well,” Aziraphale says back at the hotel, “This Sardis certainly is a character.”

“I know the name from somewhere,” You trail off in thought. Where have you heard it before? Sardis…Tardis…Sardine….You’re not sure, but it rings a bell.

Anathema is already flipping through notebooks. Aziraphale has picked up his copy of the Bible, and Crowley is on his phone. You figure everyone else has it covered, and sure enough, it’s Crowley who finds it first. Google, no doubt.

“Ha! Found the sod! He’s in Revelation.”

“Oh!” You practically jump as recognition finally hits. “He’s one of the seven angels! The ones we didn’t think were here!”

“You didn’t think any of them were here?” Anathema asks, “Did you even check, or did you just assume?”

“Well Muriel said…” You go quiet, before clearing your throat and trying again. “We didn’t look into it far at all, no.”

“So exactly what work did you do before you called me?”

“Umm…….” You say.

“Nnngggh” Crowley adds.

“A great deal less than we thought at the time, apparently,” Aziraphale finally admits with a sigh.

“You are all really bad at saving the world.” Anathema shakes her head.

❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ 🖤

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[darkfictionjude]

Etymology nonnie here!

Although I'm sure many of my questions may be answered in the patreon demo, I do have some things to ask about the Mafia IF (it's initials would be EC, right?).

1. One of the RO's is considered the heir of our family. Which means that Luce, for whatever reason, is not. Now, why is Luce not the heir?

Well, maybe this is customizable, but I see the following possibilities:

a) Luce is not part of the Mafia business. Either because their father does not want them to and Luce accepts this (that is, Luce would be allowed to be a part of it, but neither their parent nor them want them to be), or because Luce is allowed not to be a part of it. Maybe the plan is something similar to Michael Corleone, so Luce is meant to have legit career like Law, so eventually they can become a politician who helps the business that way. There are plenty of possibilities. I think this one is very likely because of the fiancé(e), but I don't know if they are a marriage out of convenience, love, or both.

b) Luce is a part of the Mafia business, but is less capable than the chosen heir. Or Luce is considered less trustworthy, for whatever reason.

c) Luce is not part of the Mafia business by not fault of their own. But they have an issue, like an illness or disability, that does not allow them to be a member. Something similar to WWC MC, if you will. I doubt this is the case, since normally such a thing is included in the original post. Although I do admit it would be interesting and angsty.

d) Luce is part of the Mafia business, but has been made to work from the bottom to the top. So, they are not considered the heir thanks to this. They have to still reach a higher position in the hierarchy.

There may be another explanations that are not dependant on Luce. Like the heir being a secret child of Luce's father (which I doubt because although this blog has debated about including incest in IFs, I would expect this to be announced in the introductory post). Or maybe the relationship between Luce and their family is very strained, or at least enough that no one expects to have Luce inherit everything.

But what really makes me curious is why the heir is younger than Luce. I think I would have less of a need to ask about the situation if the heir was older. Since in that circumstance I would just assume they came first into the position, and Luce's father later refused to remove his favor. But even then, the age gap is very small (just one year, if I recall correctly), so therefore the father would be aware of both at the same time for the most part.

I'm really curious about that dynamic.

In a similar vein, I'm also curious about the other RO's, but so far I don't know what to say or ask, since I know way too little about them to make any sort of idea in my head. It probably doesn't help that we don't have the appearance description of either of them (as far as I remember, I apologize if I'm wrong).

I understand if you cannot, or don't want to, say why Luce is not the heir if they belong to the family and their father is in charge (this is what I understood, maybe I'm wrong and all of this ask is nonsense). But I wanted to give my two cents. It'll be very funny if every theory of mine is wrong.

Also, while I wanted the Hollywood IF first, I prefer for you to write the one you want to first instead. And the Mafia is interesting too, so I wouldn't complain either way.

Yes it’s EC

So there is a reason why Luce was passed over and all I can say is that it’s not because Antonio (Luce’s dad) and Maria (Luce’s mom) hate their child. Actually, they really love Luce. Luce could’ve been heir, they were considered after a ~certain~ event happened but then they weren’t which proved to be a controversial choice as Lazlo isn’t Italian it went against a sacred rule.

Also consider if Luce is a girl or/and trans that’s also a strike against them as the Italian mafia is very patriarchal (Carmen was passed over for her younger brother), homophobic, transphobic and racist (there will never be slurs against minorities in the game because that’s not needed to show the prejudice and it makes me uncomfortable to write it). So yeah Luce as a cis boy had better chances but due to an incident they were also set aside,

I’ll make separate posts for the ROs descriptions. A quickie though: Dante has wavy black shaggy hair, light brown skin. Carmen has fair skin, black fabulously voluminous hair. Lazlo has red hair, freckles on pale skin. Charley has dark brown skin, keeps her hair in a braid she wraps into a bun.

Also I wrote for EC and the Hollywood IF at the same time, that one has a demo too ☺️

[cal-daisies-and-briars]

🔀🔀🔀🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🛑🛑🛑🛑⏲⏲⏲🏠🏠🏠🏠 🌕🌕🌕🌕 hope i hit everything !!

THANK YOU!

9 for 🔀:

---

They park the Jeep in the little gravel visitors’ parking area. Buck doesn’t say anything. He feels kind of frozen. He tries to summon memories of this place. He knows that’s stupid. He wasn’t the one who played with his siblings by the water. He wasn’t the one his father took photos of with a disposable camera. All Buck did was show up here one day as an imposter, get found, and walk easily into a life that didn’t belong to him.

“What do you want to do?”

---

21 for 🔼:

---

He’s coming to her with this. He never came to her with this the first time. He just trucked forward. Soldiered on. Pretended he was okay, until he couldn’t. 

“Did something happen?” She asks carefully. “I know the past few days have been chaotic.”

“No,” Eddie shakes his head. “I mean, yes.”

She frowns, confused. 

“Okay, nothing happened to me,” he clarifies. “Something happened to Athena’s son, it’s… Well, it was bad. But that’s not what I’m talking about.”

“Okay,” Shannon nods. “But you had a hard time anyway?”

“Yeah,” he exhales. “Yeah, I kept worrying on calls. Kept thinking, I can’t have something bad happen to me again. Not yet.”

---

12 for 🛑:

---

“That’s too bad. Because I might have rested up, if that were the case.”

It’s too dark to see the exact shade of Eddie’s cheeks, but Buck knows they’re red. 

“Buck…”

“What?” Buck asks. “Do you feel a little flustered right now?”

“You’re horrible,” Eddie accuses. 

“Oh, please,” Buck takes a step towards him. Gets real close. “No worse than you’ve been.”

“That’s not a fair comparison,” Eddie argues. 

---

9 for ⏲️:

---

The moment where, maybe - preferably - he died, and the rest of this has been a horrid representation of eternal punishment. Not quite Hell, but getting there. 

So that’s probably the best reason the alarm hasn’t gone off. Because if he was living through a normal shift, surely they’d actually have work to do. It’s Los Angeles. It’s the middle of the day. People have to be having emergencies, right? Why aren’t they having emergencies? Is it too much to ask for a little car crash or something?

---

12 for 🏠:

---

So he does. He tells them the whole story with Preston and Candi. The small annoyances, all the way up to the smoke detector and Athena not pressing immediate, Draconian charges. 

“I know you know that’s not how her job works,” May says. 

“Of course I know,” Bobby sighs. “It just makes me really angry.”

“That’s fair,” Michael says. “When you have a bad feeling, you should trust it.”

“Thank you, Michael,” Bobby nods. 

“Well,” David frowns. “There isn’t a reason to believe they’re horrible people. They just don’t have the same perspective.”

---

12 for 🌕:

---

A straight up lie. Athena isn’t working on Maisy’s case. Even if she were, no one else knows Hazel was a witness. 

“Well, possibly,” Paolo says. “Do you know who?” 

“Her first name is Hazel,” Buck says. “She was the server for our food testing and the bartender at the reception.”

“Oh, Hazel! Yes, sweet kid. Only server I’ve ever had to never break so much as a glass.” 

“That’s great,” Buck says. “Is there a way I can talk to her?”