#I mean this with every fibre of my being
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As of tonight, I have officially beaten Sonic Adventure 2 Battle to 100%, all emblems collected with every A Rank. Do not do this.
Ok but being real here, while this is an absolutely monumental task, it has given me a new appreciation for many aspects of the game. It really does force you to learn the ins and outs of each character's mechanics and levels. It is very fun to learn the intricacies of each level's gimmicks and how to use them to save time or rack up higher point combos. In most cases, this gave me at least a little more appreciation for each level. Most cases. In light of this I went and ranked every stage in the game based on how much I enjoyed them as a whole including their missions.
#I mean this with every fibre of my being#Fuck Crazy Gadget#especially Mission 5#Unironically one of the worst experiences I've had playing a game#Looking at this now it's pretty disappointing how poor Rouge's stages are#She has the best Treasure Hunting stage in Security Hall but the rest are pretty bad#It does not make up for Mad Space at all#Whoever designed that level really hated their players#Shout out to SA2's ost though#Not only keeping me sane in the process of playing these levels with all the bangers it has#On top of all the story telling put into the lyrical themes#especially Shadow's#great touches
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looking real fly today princess
#when yves washes his face does he stop at the forehead or keep going?#i mean at this point why not#anyway i got cas out of the way so we're back in business#legit the hardest part. i hate cas with every fibre of my being#i went thru the trouble of slapping a random noise texture on this as if this is a Post. theres no substance here. just my gay bald son
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learning abt friendship decay and "not reaching out to your friends for months at a time unprompted is not neurotypical behaviour" has me feeling a certain way
#experiencing some BIG FEELINGS OVER THIS REVELATION#listen i have never ever been bothered abt not seeing someone in a while or making time to talk to them bc in my mind its like not thst muc#time has passed. i mean it with every fibre of my being that when im like 'oh its ok even though we havent talked in a while and have our#own things going on it doesnt mean we're not friends anymore since we left things on a good note 8 months ago' i sincerely believe that#and for the longest time i just thought everybody makes peace with it at some point and not automatically assuming the other person doesnt#wanna talk to me anymore or smth. my longest lasting friendships are with ppl who work the same way i just thouhght that was normal#whatever organ everybody has that makes them reach out to their friends and plan hang outs i probably dont have it#i was already hesitant to ask out Alex bc i spend almost every waking hour doing smth that isnt talking to ppl unless they happen to be in#the vicinity. and at first it was bc i planned on making sure i had everything set up so i dont get stressed out and do it one at a time#but then i find out theres a friendship decay mechanic? and after dating and marrying someone you lose -10 friendship points for every#day u dont talk to them?? actually ive probably been losing friendship points this whole time without knowing bc of this?????#and i notice a lot of my own habits are also reflected in how i play bc ive been avoiding getting close to pierre and marnie since its more#of a professional relationship. like i know theyre npcs but im approaching it the way i would in real life its fucking nuts#i think its a little relieving im playing /as/ a character than myself bc as im playing im just making up little interactions in my head#than approaching things the way i would myself so it takes a bit of the stress off trying to put myself in there as a spectator. but well#being in a relationship demands a certain amount of energy even more so when theyre things that already take up energy on its own#like making time to talk to your partner and make sure they know theyre loved. i dont always have energy to put all my mental focus into it#and this is true for real life so im not really bothered by not dating anyone. but when its a game and i want my character to be with someo#and i know its fully optional and i know i could just apply the same logic to this i dont /want/ to. sometimes i want to experience#the same things other people do at least to a certain degree without the same emotional andmental stakes#no offense krobus#yapping#stardew#stardew valley#puppy plays sdv#sdv#this game has me by the ankles man
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I need yall to understand I’ve cried minimum 5 times so far over dnp as the ineffable husbands. this is so special to me specifically
#I have a gomens tattoo#like#I love this show and book so desperately with every fibre of my being#for my#birthday#my fiance got me an illustrated copy of the book#like I cannot overstate how much it means to me#and now dnp#dressed as the ineffable husbands#TAGGING INEFFABLE HUSBANDS#I’m being so very parasocial rn icl#phan#dan and phil#amazingphil#daniel howell#phil lester#dnp#dip n pip#danisnotonfire#dan howell#dapg
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what if i script draco into my hogwarts dr just to deck him in the face?
#no hate to people shifting for him i just...#hate him with every fibre of my being#and would like to teach him what it means when you talk shit about muggleborns#nicely of course#shiftblr#shifting realities#reality shift#reality shifting#shifting community#shifting#marauders shifting#desired reality#shifting motivation#shifters#hp shifting#shifting to harry potter#harry potter dr#hogwarts dr#hogwarts desired reality#shifting to marauders era#shifting to hogwarts#shifting to desired reality#shifting to my dr#shifting antis dni#shifting consciousness#shiftinconsciousness#reality shifter#shifttok#shifting blog#shiftythrifting
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LIFE UPDATE FOR U MY LOVES
my partner handed in their 2 week notice to their fuckhead father
they got a permanent contract offer at a new job WITHOUT taking a pay decrease!
the job is 8 hours away lmao so we will be moving again
however!! we're moving in with my sister temporarily so we'll get to see our nephew and her teenagers more often!
#their job is like#10 minutes away from the uni there so if i do wanna go back it'll make things a bit easier#um but yeah idk if ill be able to be doing much in the next month or so bc we'll be packing pretty much any time we're free#but it means we get to cut off the RAT FUCKKKKKKKKKKK LETS GOOOOO#i hate that man with every fibre of my being and i can't wait for him to be miserable not having his child or knowing anything about them#suck on my asshole u narcissistic fuck#anyway LMAO#「mercury speaks」
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The fact that we haven’t even heard any of the band members talk to each other in a non-show setting this whole time 😭 the pancake video is the closest to an off stage interaction that i can think of like obviously no interviews but not even instagram stories or anything where anyone says anything to each other. If they ever drop any kind of documentary footage and we see them interacting and talking in any way i’ll disintegrate on the spot like i think no press for the return tour was definitely the right call but PLEASEEEE
#watching old full gang interviews trying to imagine a reality where they still did that#it wouldn’t work the same way but doesn’t mean i don’t yearn for it with every fibre of my being
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btw if any mutuals/ followers want to reach out, my dms are always open!! I'm very lonely and I'd love to make some new friends<33 I'm an excellent listener too so if you need to vent I'm always here for u guys :-)
#i mean this with every fibre of my being btw. im close to 1k and id love to have more of a community here on tumblr#asks and dms are always welcome :-)
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if you told me all those years ago that the people who made the song that got me through the worst time of my life would go on to do some of the craziest things in their career and you said they're gonna go perform at all these places and do all these things 😭 idk what baby me would've done but current me is literally so overwhelmed with emotions ... 😞🫶‼️💗 like that's just too crazy to me to really put into words but watching the skz journey feels so heart warming and exciting and im so incredibly fucking proud of them... 🥺🤍 my skz you are so amazing 😭🫶💗🌙🫂
#idk what i'm trying to say#but 17 year old me found you when my life was in ruin#and then 🤍🫂 you picked me up and put me on my feet... 😞💗‼️ and i... i am lucky to have you in my life ...#i wouldn't be the same without you...#no i mean.. i wouldn't even be here without you#😞 i know that for sure ... like without a doubt#that part of my life was ... bad 👍#sitting on that train after being assaulted the first time and feeling like it was over like i was going to kill myself and then#all i heard was chans voice saying 'blessings wait for you'#and 😞 it felt like the first hug id had in ages... like someone had held me and told me it would be ok 😞💗#idk ... kinda presumptive to say i owe them my life but... 🫂 i wouldn't be here without them#that much is for damn sure ...#so to see them come this far ... do so much#🥺 the pride in my heart is beyond overwhelming#being here since they were nugu losers 😭💗🫶 GOD I LOVE UUUU MY SKZ!!!!!#i don't know how much more i can say it........ i so incredibly love you 😞🤍💗#god i'm so proud#i hope chan knows 😭🫶💗🥺 with every fucking fibre in my being that i'm always ALWAYS cheering him on 😞 that he deserved this so infinitely#god i fucking love him 😭‼️ my darling boy.........#:( my skz fr...#li.txt
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There's so many people I've met on the internet through the years that are always so used to people being cruel or rude to them and when I'm nice they always say they love being around me but it just makes me so...... sad. Like everyone deserves someone who is genuinely kind to them and yeah joking around and being mean to your pals is fine when you respect boundaries but when it's a constant thing it just weirds me out. I love being nice to people. I love spreading kindness. What do you get from being a huge jackass to everyone, including people who you claim to be very close to? I dunno.
Everyone deserves to be loved by their friends!! It's one of my favorite things to make my friends smile and make them feel good about themselves. It feels like everyone is always so ready to put their friends down for a joke. I love lifting mine up!!! Maybe it's just me. But I am a lover at heart.
#talking#might delete soon its just random thoughts#i have had so many people in my life even just randoms gush to me about how its jarring how i dont make fun of them for their interests#like it takes every fibre of my being to not immediately say drop whoever is making fun of you this much#that me being nice to you is such a monumental event#i am begging people to stop giving horrible and mean people the time of day and realize you will find something much better in due time#even if you are lonely for a while#because i would much rather be lonely than constantly crying and feeling like less of a person due to some asshole who doesnt know when#to quit#i've had people in my life who would tell me im just too sensitive#maybe i am!!!! but why is that a bad thing to be sensitive and to be emotional. why are we so obsessed with being horrible and rude#okay yapfest over see yall next year
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I know I've been particularly incoherent for the past few days (again), and it's so dramatic and ridiculous but it seriously feels like something is punishing me. I just want to like things a normal amount. I just want to like people and characters a normal amount.
I don't want to become so fully obsessed that literally nothing else exists and thinking about anything else feels like my brain is being stabbed with a thousand tiny knives. I don't want to need to find every piece of information I possibly can on whoever it is this time. I don't want to feel like I'm (literally) losing my mind when I see them. I don't want any of this!
I can not believe that I exist as a human being on this stupid planet just to get obsessed with people over and over and over again forever.
#like it's not. fun. it's not 'oh haha I just like this guy a lot :3' no it feels like. dying.#like I said I know it's fucking dramatic I know. but it feels SO BAD#and sometimes SO GOOD because nothing else gives my brain that feeling but god damn it most of the time it's just painful#maybe I should try drugs#probably.#maybe I should start drinking again#that made it bearable#but no that's. stupid#but my god how am I supposed to go through this again and again and again so many times in a row#I don't know how to explain how fucking devastating it is to attach yourself to. some stupid idiot (I'm sorry I don't mean that.). only to#not really care anymore after a couple months#what do you MEAN. I literally love this person with every stupid fibre of my stupid being and now he's just. some guy again??#I don't know. how. not to do this. it's not a choice! it's not something I DO. it HAPPENS to me.#and it only doesn't happen when I'm so depressed that I want to actively die.#anyway yeah it's about John Larroquette and Dan Fielding and Jenkins and yeah I'm the fucking stupidest fucking dumbass on earth#someone hit me in the head to fix my brain please#and seriously this is not normal. it can not be normal. this is not how normal people feel about stuff. it can't be#I think this is why I don't get fandom culture. and shipping specifically. like. no I'm not. I'm not enjoying these characters. I'm not#watching this show and thinking aww these two should kiss :)#I'm. not there anymore. I don't fucking exist. all I do. is think about this person. I can't stop it.#I am not a person when I don't feel like this. I'm not even real. I'm just whoever I'm obsessed with. I say that so much but that's how it#feels! I'm not real.#so anyway when I say 'haha I'm fine' what I mean is no I'm not someone make my brain work right please#I just. see him and start crying. because it's so overwhelming.#maybe I should find a therapist and hope they speak English and show them this post :)#haha no that's ridiculous I could never mention this to a normal person#guess I'll just keep driving myself to insanity with this crap.#personal
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back in 2 weeks
#exambs ☹️#yes this means i will miss the succession finale. yes it will take every fibre of my being not to kill myself on the spot
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debating on if i should play more da2 tonight. and if i do should i play my Fucked Up Evil Save(Pro-Templar Red Hawke Anders Rivalmance where i fucking bully everyone) or my Good Fun Wizard Save(Pro-Mage Blue/Purple Fenris Friendmance)
#the fucked up evil save is a nightmare im so fucking mean too everyone#it goes against every fibre of my being to keep sending mages to the circle#but i have to commit to making Matthew the worst possible man i can make him#Garwyn is just having fun being a gay wizard
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for the ask game (i plan to send your entire f/o list HEEHEHEHE)
this'll probably be so obvious but oh well 🫶
looks: somewhat attractive | eh | not really my type | pretty | handsome | beautiful | stud | gorgeous | SWEET LORD MERCY
can you relate to this character on a personal level?: no | not really | somewhat | yes | they are me
would you date/be friends with this character in real life if they were real?: total bros | friends | best friends | date | become their steady boyfriend/ girlfriend | neither | i don’t kno (depends on his opinion of me.. either he'd like me or despise me lmao)
#➳ the fool's mail box#➳ sender; azura#if i had to pick an f/o uhh I'd pick him. i mean what :3#but ohmyohod i adore him with every fibre of my being#i hope he'd like me irl.. maybe we'd bond over video games or our hatred of society... im nowhere near as hardcore as him but still!#I'm thinking about this too much but i just love him sooo much <3
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I just want to let you know I love your fic Haeresis Dea
You don't know how much i adore the way you write this story and how it hurts my feelings, it's so raw i cant stop re-reading it. It's almost 2 am and i just finished all 6 chapters again. My fav one is 6 chapter and every time i read readers pov i feel her pain
IT'S SO DELICIOUS! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS FIC LOVE
ANONNNNNNN
I’m so sorry it’s taken me this long to get back to you, but please know i reread this message all the time whenever i’m down and out about the fic. this silly side project has elicited the kindest responses from people and i know EVERYONE says this but: it really means the world to me. truly.
i hope you’re still out there in the tumblr ether! a new chapter’s just heen posted!
and more to cum come when you and secondo finally reunite hehehe,,,,
#simperator answers#the ghost fandom is the sweetest and i mean that with every fibre of my being#haeresis dea fic
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Hey do you have permission from the owner to be posting their artwork to your blog?
I wish I had the answer to that question.
#the owner was for over 6 years my closest loved one#we fell out of contact a few years ago and now they have made themself unreachable by me#i mean I have tried#and there are yet still things i can do but out of respect for them i choose to allow them to reach out for me if they want to#they know how to contact me in many many ways if they want to#other than that I give them the respect of distance that they want#I don't tag them in anything bc they don't want that#it's hard when you shared like every fibre of your being with someone and then they have just deleted themself out of your existence#the reason why i reposted those separately is so that if I want to reblog it then I don't bother them with a notification#i want to respect their distance to the maximum extent
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