#I made them say the funny number im gonna cry

[kiwimillipede]

las criaturas

+ also i got noticed in the live oh god im gonna scream

[austinsastrology8991]

> Ascendant Aspects < How you Appear to be, and how your treated based off your appearances > why you look like a clown without makeup

Ascendant aspecting Sun - I like your smile. Did you put it on for me, or for yourself? yes your charismatic, yes we noticed why your so confident, yes your literally the greatest person do you really need us to shower you in affection all the fkn time? your extra but too many toppings ruin a good pizza. your the embodiment of the cheesy smile from that cat in alice in wonderland. main character energy for sure you get the attention and you know how to use it Ascendant Aspecting moon - 🌚 < dont they look like that.? idk but you guys look like someone you want to grab the cheeks of and treat like a baby, your like a sugar glider. but we know your emotional so we have to be careful with how we grab your cheeks 👀 please stop crying its just a joke > also; big ass eyes. you are so sweet that everyone just wants to take you home and feed you till you become so obese you cant leave Ascendant Aspecting Mercury - the most devilish and cheeky smile all at once. they look like a kid about to do something bad, or have just been caught doing something bad and are now trying to explain why they had to do that dumbassery. but no matter how much you explain yourself, we will still question you because its funny watching you come up with explanations. you give me the vibe of any character from cartoon network or nickledoen - timmy turner, southpark, phineas and ferb, ed edd and eddy, or fkn bart simpson, you act like a cartoon yes.

Ascendant Aspecting Venus - I dont normally do this but whats ur number? is what your used to hearing presumably. and its not necessarily because your attractive... okay you are, you can stop pouting now. but its because you know how to get attention and you clearly love getting it. but they act so superficial, and oblivious sometimes... like they purposrfully look away just so its easier for you to look at them, 💀 then they look back playfully and it gets you in the feels. remind me of doctor who's bitches (any of them) they all act the same idc what you say

Ascendant Aspecting Mars - so pissed off lol but its hot. they are fierce > if they want something they are going to get it, and even the mere consideration of negotiating what they want will just get them more mad. which makes them more attractive? idk people love their ferocity, and as much as people say they don't like aggressive types, they don't ever get in their way when they pissed off (ik because im hot head) your basically a hornet > and no one gonna fight a hornet without the proper precautions Ascendant aspecting Jupiter - Yall are excellent at impressions and being impressionable, idk how you do it so well. You just act normal but then pull off this funny shit and return back to normal like its nothing. you guys perfected just being, and this energy makes people want to be around you. Your like a firework, the explosion is awesome, but when it goes away your like damn that was awesome wish it stayed; but thats what makes it so good, because we never know when its coming, and when its gone we want it back lol Ascendant Aspecting Saturn - batman without the mask sucks. thats you. batman without the mask.... why so serious???? > "because life shouldnt be taking for granted and fuckery aint apart of my Repertoire" - is some whack ass shit yall would say. you have great dignity, but people get insecure around you because your on top of your shit. oh and you tell people to get on top of their shit all the fkn time lol. > your like a crow, you look like one and act like one. - Side note- one time i had a stand off with a crow: I was chilling at home and i was on top of these tile blocks, then this crow came along. I tried to scare him, by like staunching him just a bit. but he responded by gripping the tree branch he was perched on, by twisting his claw foot; and he did it with so much ferocity it made this bone cracking noise (from the strength of his grip gripping the tree) and suddenly i was intimated.... by a fkn crow. okay moving on

Ascendant Aspecting Uranus - how did you even become like that. no one really understands why you act the way you do, you do some really eccentric things which are eye grabbing but also disturbing the more you think about it. your like a sword fish. theres probably more effective ways to kill fish, but i mean a sword works, we are just wondering how you attached a sword to your face. also try to calm down, you doing so much and acting so bizarre that im actually more worried about you, even though im laughing my ass off. Ascendant Aspecting Neptune - your like a mirror of all that i ever could want in a person, and this mysterious allure you so easily pull off is truly enchanting. its like being around you makes it feel as if reality can so easily be readjusted into what i would like it to be. but this quality of urs is addicting, and no wonder people project onto you. but you cant even blame them, you literally shapeshift into whatever you want, and typically you like to show it off. your like a chameleon. or a axolotl Ascendant Aspecting Pluto - you scare people easily lol. your a spider. but spiders are sexy.... look at the BUNDA. okay but those teeth yeesh, have you ever seen a spider like lick its lips, bro its fkn scary. theres a reason arachnophobia is the most popular phobia and its because spiders are fucked. and yall are fucked. you move like a spider, and i swear to god you smile like one too lol. but people low key wanna be eaten by a spider..... so go ahead choose yo prey you fkn creepy crawler

[sheisntyouspam]

yeah so i was gonna post this on my laptop but oh well

I FINISHED THE BOOK IM CRYING IT WAS SO GOOD 5 STARS 5 STARS

chapter 47 to end (whywhywhy (spoilers??))

okay so i know i’ve been very on off about liz’s character but it’s just cause she’s so flipping complicated 😭

like we keep seeing glimpses of little liz and I LIVED FOR THOSE

but anywho all ended well so it was good

IM ACTUALLY SO DEAD WES’ CONFESSION WAS DOING THINGS TO ME

LIZ IS SO MUCH STRONGER THAN I AM CAUSE I WOULD HAVE FORGAVE HIM IN A HEART BEAT

also it was so so sad to see liz being so stubborn (or whatever call it what you want) when wes was so trying so so hard

i felt him bro i felt him

i’m gonna miss these characters so much

we got some baileycharlie

AFAMAOA CUTIESSS

ALSO I LOVE CLARK NOW??

HE IS NUMBER ONE LIZWES SHIPPER AND WES STAN

HES SO FUNNY AND CUTE AND ANSIWBSBSMW

LIKE GOD BLESS YOU CLARK

anyways

i think we should move onto the DEEP STUFF

(i’m so childish please murder me)

THE DEEP STUFF:

one of the reason why i liked this book so much - yes i’m going to say the exact same thing i said in all the other reviews - is cause it was SO REAL

some people are complaining that ‘oh wes with the scooters was so childish’ ‘oh wes saying song lyrics is so weird’ it’s not cause it was RAW AND REAL

it was silly and that made it so real

anyways

that wasn’t actually the deep stuff

please read on-

another thing that made it so real was the whole concept of it

there was this one line liz had that went smth like ‘you can everything at one point and nothing the next’

i felt that

the way that friendships and relationships can just flip out of the blue

the way that wes was trying so so hard but wasn’t getting the same effort from liz (no hate NO HATE i’m just saying)

the way liz wanted to forgive him again but she had a fear of the past repeating itself

the miscommunication

ofc everyone hates the miscommunication trope (if you dont okay ??) but the miscommunication also made this book so real and raw

they both thought the other person hated them

they both made assumptions

it was quite literally heart shattering

depressing as it is i cried so much cause i related (literally currently going through the end of a friendship haha (let’s pretend i didn’t say that x))

at least they got a happy ending though

okay bye thanks for coming to my tedtalk

[thomatri]

Y’all uh I had a submission but I accidentally deleted it I want to cry but uh enjoy they sent me a Haikyuu randomizer pintress pin so if that’s You pls comment,dm, or send me an anonymous message because thank you sm❤️

Synopsis- Haikyuu random life

Paring - Tsukishima,Ushijima,Ennoshita

———————————————————————

1st life

———

“God I’m so nervous for tomorrow” I say laying down on my bed FaceTime with Watari

“Why are you nervous your not even playing?” Watari asks laughing

“Oh hush I’m still nervous this is like the first practice match and I gotta do my manager duties to T or they’ll kick me off the team!” I say and he laughs again making me glare

“If you came to Aoba Johsai you wouldn’t have these problems” he says shrugging with a smirk

“Haha very funny” I say rolling my eyes

Watari been my friends since 5th grade ever since I saved him from some bullies and we’ve been attached ever since that was until for my first year or high school my friends got the bright idea to move.

————————————-

“You ready ?” Tsumu asks ruffling my hair

“Yeah…no” I say

“You’ll be Fine your an amazing manager does do what you usually do and you’ll do great” Samu says and I give him a big hug

I don’t have a favorite brother but if I did it’d be Osamu

“Hey! Where’s my hug?” Tsumu says smirking and I roll my eyes playfully giving him his hug as I depart from the subway

————————————

“Alright Karasuno on there way is everyone okay?” I ask and I see nods and hear agrees

“Nah I think I broke my arm” Lev says smirking

“Lev I’m gonna actually break your arm shut up” I say glaring, he knows how nervous I am

“Don’t worry your pretty head Y/n everything gonna go fine”Kuroo says smiling at me and I smile back

“Thanks Cap” I say and Karasuno walks in

My eyes dart to them and my heart feels like it’s beating 10x faster not because the practice match is about to start but because of a certain blonde haired boy

“Woah” I say and Kuroo laughs

“Oogling at the other team?” Kuroo asks and I walk away embarrassed

“No” I grumble

They say there thank you,s shake hands and start

“Hi im Kiyoko” a Beautiful Girl with raven colored hair says smiling at me

“I’m y/n!” I say smiling back

“What year are You?” Kiyoko asks

“First” I say and she nods

“I’m a third year”

“Woah”

She laughs and it’s beautiful what about her isn’t pretty

I hear celebrating from Karasuno

I think the blonde guy made a good block

“That’s Tsukishima “ she says and I’m shocked

“Are you a mind reader?!” I ask and she laughs again

“I wish nope I just noticed you glancing at him” she says smirking

“Nope!”

“Sure Sure”

————————————-

They have a like a million sets but I have to admit I’m seeing them go

Yamamoto and the bald guy from Karasuno say something about protecting pretty managers or something like that

I feel Kiyoko grab my hand and pull me towards Tsukishima away from everyone

Shit

“Tsukishima this is y/n Nekoma manager” Kiyoko says smiling and he nods

“Hey Y/n would you like to exchange numbers” he asks with a stoic expression and I nod

Holy crap!

I walk back over to my team to see Kuroo and Yaku smirking which makes my happiness melt away

“They grow up so fast” Kuroo says fake sniffing

“Oh shut up” I say rolling my eyes with a smile

“We’re proud of you Y/n” Yaku says giving me a hug gosh I love him he’s so amazing

“Thanks Yaku senpai” I say with a smile

“Is Alisa picking us up?” Lev asks and I nod

Me and Lev are classmates. One time I was talking to Lev after school and Alisa his pretty older sister spotted us and offered to drop me off. I declined of course but when I explained I rode the subway she wouldn’t take no as a answer explaining girls my age shouldn’t ride the subway alone and she had a point prior I had rode the subway with my older brothers

It definitely helped strengthen me and Lev friendship and he’s probably my best friend but I’d never tell him

———————————————————————-

2nd life (won’t let me add text after a image 🥲)

Classmate - Sasuka

Mentor - Oikawa

Lover - Ushijima

Best friend - Ennoshita

Childhood friend - Hinata

Rival - Aone

Siblings - the Yamamotos

School - Itachiyama

———

After ease dropping of Oikawa little argument with Ushijima I rush out from my hiding spot

“Ushijima!” I yell

He looks behind him eyes soften

“Your not Even gonna say hi” I say fake sniffling

He walks up to me and gives me a hug

“I apologize” he says with a soft smile and I return it

“Eww get a room” Oikawa says fake gagging

“Way to ruin the mood Oikawa senpai” I say rolling my eyes reluctantly letting go of Ushijima

I give him a kiss on my tip toes making him stunned of a second

“Don’t wanna keep up your team see ya Ushijima” I say waving

“Wakatoshi” he says and I giggle

“Sorry, Wakatoshi” I say and he has a ghost of a smile and walks away

“I can’t believe your dating the enemy” Oikawa says

“Correction your enemy” I say

“I’m positive it’s a one sided beef anyway” I say shrugging and he gasps dramatically

It hurt to see my Oikawa team loose but I can’t lie I was rooting for Karasuno I mean all my friends go there and I got to see Aone loose this has been a good week. I don’t hate Aone or anything we just have a little middle blocker rivalry. I play middle blocker for It Itachiyama and he plays middle blocker for Dateko. We accidentally met after I went against there girls team and we stayed and saw there match. I challenged him to be my rival which he nervously agreed to

I met Ushijima in my first year after Itachiyama beat them at nationals. I fell in love at first sight and after hanging out and a few dates we started dating.

————————————-

Monday

————————————-

“Oh my god and he was sooo hot you don’t understand Suckusa”I say smiling laying my head on my desk

“I really don’t” he says disgusted. I can tell even without his mask

“Your a hater” I say rolling my eyes and he shrugs

“I don’t even know what you see in him, he’s such a dead inside guy” he says

I give him a look

“That’s the most hypocritical shit I’ve ever heard” I say laughing and he glares

“Whatever”

“Oh and you need to retouch your roots your starting to look like Atsumu” he says

“You ass hole!”

I grumble

“Whatever I’ll ask Yamamoto to touch up my roots when I get home” I say rolling my eyes

————————————

In orchestra we had a sub no nobody ain’t playing shit

“Who you texting” Komori asks. He’s Sakuka cousin

“Wait let me guess Sakusa,Hinata, Yamamoto,Ennoshita, or Hinata” he lists with a smile

I deadpan

“Is that seriously all who I text” I say looking at my phone like it’s gonna comfort me

“I mean…” he says with a smile looking away

I glare playfully

———————————————————————

3rd life

Lover - Ennoshita

Mentor - Aone

Classmate- Fukatachi

Rival - Ukai

Sibling - Sugawara

Best friend- Iwazume and Oikawa

Childhood friend - Asahi

Team - Dateko

———

Ding

“Hey Mr.Ukai”

“Hey coach”

“Ugh why are you here” Ukai says groaning

“That’s not nice Mr.Ukai” I say fake pouting

“Suga is your player” I say hand on my hip with a smirk and Suga glares at me

“He’s obviously talking about your annoying ass” Suga says smirking at me and

“HAH?!”

I cough trying to gain composure and not cuss Suga tf out

“Anyways Mr.Ukai when is yall Next Match” I ask looking at the candy in his store

“Why dont You ask your brother who,I don’t know goes to Karasuno”Ukai says glaring at me

“Well your the coach shouldn’t you know these things” I say glaring back

“How about instead of bothering us at practice matches you just ask that boy out so you can get out of hair” Ukai says laughing

“SHUT UP I DONT LIKE HIM” I say and Suga laughs too

“Fuck you” I say glaring at Suga

“And for the record I don’t just come to matches for Ennoshita he doesn’t even play no offense to him I go because of my amazing baby brother” I say smirking at Suga who gives me a disgusted look

“We’re twins how the hell am I your baby brother?” He asks rolling his eyes grabbing him and I some candy

“Well I popped out first so I’m older” I say smirking

“Mom only told you that to make you feel better” Suga says laughing

“SHE DID NOT”

“STOP ARGUING IN MY STORE”

———————————-

“Look you got us kicked out…again” Suga says sighing

“I did not! It was your fault” I grumble

“n/n?!” I hear an annoying voice call

“Why are You stalking me Oikawa?” I ask smirking

Oikawa gasps

“Hey Sugawara, hey n/n” Iwaizume says with a smile

I walk up to him and give him a big hug

“Wowwww how come he gets a hug and I don’t” Oikawa says with a pout

“Sorry I dont hug stalkers” I say and he gasps again but even louder

“What are You two Doing out here?” Suga asks

“Well Iwa Chan and I wanted to sit back and relax and enjoy our evening when all of a sudden I hear this agitating,grating voice” Oikawa says and Suga bust out laughing

“Oh shut up Shittykawa” Iwaizume says and I laugh

——————————————————————-

The other two btw

[andy4yippee]

Between the notes

( Short Eddie Munson x Chrissy Cunningham FanFic)

(Chrissy AND Eddie are alive AU.)

A/N :

This is fluff. I love them so much i'm gonna cry everywhere : )

Chrissy Cunningham never imagined she would find herself outside the dingy old trailer that Eddie Munson called home. It wasn’t that she was scared—no, the events of the past months had shown her true terror. It was that she felt out of place, her friends, everyone, expected her to be normal again. And just a week or two later, they expected her to be normal. to be her again.

She knocked, swallowing back the nerves throughout her body.

The door creaked open, and Eddie stood there, surprise flickering in his dark eyes. “Chrissy?” he said, his voice softer than she’d ever heard it in the crowded hallways of Hawkins High. “What are you doing here?”

“I... I heard you play,”

“The guitar. Last night, at the Hideout. You were, uhm, amazing.”

Eddie blinked, a slow grin spreading across his face. “You came to see Corroded Coffin? Now that is a twist I didn't see coming.”

“I needed to get out, i guess." She laughed, "And- your music, it helped. It made me feel.." she paused.

"Less alone.”

Eddie opened the door wider, stepping aside. “Uhm, Wanna come in? I was just working on something new. Maybe you could help me out. You know, since you’re my new number one fan.” He said the last part sarcastically.

Chrissy hesitated for a moment before stepping inside, the smell of incense and old books surprisingly comforting. Chrissy found herself relaxing for the first time in months.

"Im glad you came to see us. You know, I vaguely remember saying you should- months ago. before all the shit."

Chrissy smiled softly, a glint of white in her eye.

"Yeah, I remember that too."

A comfortable silence washed over them.

"Uh, How've you been since that?" Eddie mumbled, his tone cautious.

Chrissy's smile dissipated, and she let out a sigh.

"I've been alright. I mean, you're kinda forced to..act normal after. people just expect you to be OK."

Eddie nodded. "Ya, I get what you mean. Luckily, I'm not around a crowd of shitheads who don't believe in depression."

Chrissy let out a audible giggle, making Eddie smile again.

"Im sooo funny, I know, I know." he leaned closer to her.

Using her sleeve to cover her mouth, they stared at each other, both wheezing after a few seconds. Chrissy catched her breath.

"I missed talking to you. that time in the forest, it was really nice. Uhm, you're really nice." She bit her bottom lip to keep her smile contained.

"You're nice too." Eddie choked out, scratching the back of his neck.

"Hey, uh, could you play a song?"

she hummed for a second- thinking.

"Its far from metal, but it's my favorite one."

"Sure. name it, if it's pop, i doubt I'll know it. but, I'll try."

"Dreams. Fleetwood Mac. It's, uhm, rock? I think.."

Eddies head shoots up.

"I thought you'd be a..ABBA kinda person." He says, surprised. "Or maybe Dolly."

"But, Yeah, I know that one."

They settle back onto the couch, the soft hum of Eddie’s guitar filling the air once more as he plays. Chrissy’s eyes drift closed, The beat always calmed her. The notes blend together,

In the quiet of the trailer,

between the notes.

[sungbeam]

here to flood your inbox with the questions✨

BUT HI DUCKIE MEIMEI 💗

3, 4, 9, 15, 18, 19, 21, 23, (IM SO SORRY FOR STEALING SO MANY NUMBERS BUT THESE QUESTIONS ARE SO GOOD), 28, 29, and 34

signing off with love

- ash

ash jie !!!! tysm for ur ask ^_^ and omg ty for the influx of numbers hehe <3

fanfic writer asks

3. What's been your most popular fic this year?

oh it was definitely my beomgyu drabble mine !! it was the fic that got me a ton of my followers and it's my first post to reach 1k and 2k+ notes which was super exciting :')

4. What piece of writing are you most proud of?

find my answer to #4 here!

9. What's a scene you wrote this year that you're particularly proud of?

hmm kind of a hard question cuz sometimes i think i'm a genius and other times i think a scene just doesn't work 😭😭 but ,,, i'll say i remember being super satisfied w lost at sea the pilot episode/chapter for my *cough* unfinished riptide!mark lee series ha,, haha

15. Are there are other writers or artists who have inspired you?

OH MY GOD SO MANY (´Д⊂ヽ i'm just gonna name drop :') @ethereal-engene ofc, @loveliestfelix @korijime @jaehunnyy @leejungchans @goldenhypen @/maijunejuly @petrichor-han @tranquilpetrichor @justalildumpling @polarisjisung @stayarmytinyzenmoa-l probs many more as well ksfbkenf but thank u all for being such amazing people who light up my dms and dashboard and make me want to keep writing and dreaming :')

18. Do you have a fic that you wish received more attention?

lmao a few tbh so i'll recommend a few 😁

— cruel summer (kim seungmin)

— the cage (yoon jeonghan)

— in all your endeavors, forever (kim hongjoong)

— 11:22am (jung sungchan)

19. What was your favorite comment, or piece of feedback this year?

definitely has to be ash jie's full review of in all your endeavors forever like having a whole post dedicated to a very through review of MY OWN fic just,,, omg it just made my day fr like woah mind-blown yk? so thank u sm jie :'( 💖

but in general, any feedback or comment just makes me so warm and fuzzy and excited !! once, someone told me they came back from the dead to remind people that i was one of the best writers here and tbh i could cry 😭😭😭 ??

21. Not a question, but a challenge! Say something nice about your writing!

*panics* UHM!! i,,, like that i've been improving in the description department? idk bro (´Д⊂ヽ like i'm trying to be more patient with my descriptions and i def have some work to do w solving my white room syndrome, but i think i'm getting better w touchy feely emotional things lol

23. What fic did you enjoy writing the most?

i actually really enjoyed writing the fics with crack/humor in them a lot! i write a lot of angst and i do enjoy writing that too, but i also love writing banter sm

will specifically mention this jungwon fic and this nct dream fic tho

28. What is your favorite story or chapter title you came up with this year?

OOH !!! uhhhhh i really like "cruel mercy" (wip), "bird hunt" (wip), and "dear chan, have you ever been in love before?"

29. What was the funniest comment or piece of feedback that you received?

AHAHHAHA when i posted the one beomgyu drabble for my october mini series, almost all the reblogs were talking abt how tf were those cheesy pickup lines attractive 💀🤡 tbh only beomgyu could make corny ass pick up lines attractive but yuh ✨ also whenever em rbs my stuff, she's so funny sjfnejfbj like i once posted a fic at 2am and she rb'd w smth like wait y aren't u asleep beam (ignoring the fact that she was also not asleep 💀)

34. What's the weirdest thing you researched for a fic?

LMAOO i don't think i remember half the things i google while in the moment tbh 🤣 but i vividly remember going down the rabbit hole of cheerleader positions and stunts for this one wip bc idk what any of that cheer stuff is called (´Д⊂ヽ and i think soon i'm gonna need to spiral down the dance rabbit hole too @_@ like figuring out waltzes and tangos and what that one dance intak did for isac :')

[another-dra-anew]

mekaru cuz she's neglected tbh 🥺?

im so fucking guilty of neglecting her. i neeed her to make friends so i can start spinning her in my mind with characters im already obsessed with so she can be More in my brain as her own character. mekaru pls pls just start being more authentic and love urself-

cw she has so much internalized homophobia. that’s all tho

-My identity hc for them

canon lesbian!! has a lot of comphet tho. like, a lot. like, only character to upload the “fact” they’re het to their report card. 

- Thoughts on their home life/family

ya know. i think she’s lying to herself about how much she likes kids. i don’t think she’s inclined to them but playing babysitter all the time has made her p child adverse. however admitting this means realizing she can’t gain “i am a normal respectable non-offending person who no one has any reason to have any issue with” points by raising 2.5 kids. so. yeah she just chooses to keep lying to herself

- How i feel about their canonical writing/handling

tbh i think i do a bad job portraying her comphet? buuut. to take a step back and think neutrally about things, i think that’s predominantly a result of, again, the role she plays in the story, and the fact we’re not in her head. we can judge how well i write her comphet when we get to pick her brain a bit more in ftes. id rather have a more subtle, more accurate depiction, then one that’s made inaccurate with how in your face “wow my bestie is so pretty if only girls who liked girls were real…” it is. (<- not that portrayals like that are bad/wrong, it’s abt enjoying yourself while not feeding into negative stereotypes! i just don’t really want to depict her comphet in that more lighthearted manner).

- The one thing i’d want to make canon about them

again. this is prolly just gonna be stuff which didn’t happen in canon but could’ve if things were different? w/mekaru i think if she studied psychology more and like. Dedicated herself to it she could easily rise to shsl psychiatrist level. this is canon but i think that she’s specifically interested in medicine when it comes to treatment of the human condition. she likes and grasps it all, but the history of assorted pills is where she Shines

- My number one favorite ship for them

okada my beloved <3. (obligatory: okada aimi is mekarus bestie! she’ssss. sapphic, i don’t have anything more specific/anything otherwise canon for her. she likes mekaru and thinks mekaru likes her back (she’s right), buuut. she hasn’t confessed because she thinks she’ll be rejected (she’s right, again.) she’s trying to gently tug mekaru into having a Revelation but it hasn’t been going v well for her.

- …Now everyone else i ship with them

i used to say that like. tomori was probably her gateway into her moment of Realization. i can still see that being true but i think it was less genuine desire to date and moreso.  mekaru projecting what she feels she needs to be onto tomori then seeing tomori being queer and going. hmmm. anyways tho. i kinda like her w/kurokawa but i think kurokawas just v shippable? poor okada tho i think she’d would be crying and throwing up if she found out mekaru dated a girl from hpa before dating her.

also tho i kinda think she’d be cute w/hatanami. sorry okada :(

- The thing i will NEVER ship

she is in fact still a lesbian, folks! uhh past that tho im rotating her with different girls and i don’t like the idea of her and inori like. at all for some reason

- a dynamic/relationship i wish was explored more (in canon, or in fandom)

i think it’d be neat if she. i don’t know got to have friends. id like to chat abt her interacting with tomori more!!

- thoughts on their design (appearance-wise)

im really happy with her redesign! her personality and demeanor changed from the first one she had here, but her fit didn’t change, and it really just didn’t work. also it’s kinda matchy with linujs actual beta design for rei iirc? so that’s funny

- A music-related thought- a song that reminds me of them, or what their music taste is, etc

lol. little miss perfect from write out loud/etc. uhh past the obvi one i had to list… first love/late spring - mitski comes to mind less in a. struggling with growing up and loving seriously as an adult and moreso. fear that comes with realizing ur in love with ur bestie (u are a teen with severe internalized homophobia). again apologizing for my inability to stick with what the song is actually about at least this one was semi accurate. please know i will go to war when it comes to respecting mitski as an artist and not dismissing her experiences and what she’s saying. 

[lawtistic]

tier lists uhh woohoo

“who uses emails anymore” me. because i had to email one of these to myself so i could get it on my computer. now here we are

i went a did a shit ton of death note tierlists and now that i have the urge to shit myself i will post them because i need an excuse to post something on my masterlist when i get around to making that

characters:

i know who that manga guy is but i forgot his name and he is funny and sexy despite being present for 2 pages and thats why hes up there

im a certified sidoh hater btw

there is a number of characters i ranked pretty high just because theyre hot (mello [partially], namikawa, gevanni, lidner, nameless manga guy, wedy)

characters (adaptations):

i didnt watch the 2006 live action because i havent gotten to it, couldnt finish the 2017 netflix version because of the gore, and havent watched the korean musical because i am superstitious and the circumstances of that are triggering so yayyy! so the characters that are on here from those are ones i have seen clips of and feedback and such

and some characters werent on there??? like mikami was in the jdrama and was an important enough character why would u not add him

characters kind of deviate from their og rankings but that is either because i have gotten 8 hours of sleep in the past 48 hours or something stirred in my brain and i was being smart but i no longer remember it

adaptations:

i probably shouldnt have even ranked the 2006 live action and 2017 netflix ver at all but i probably thought the list was looking pretty empty when  was doing this

theres also a lot missing but those are the main ones so i dont care that much

(i would have personally added the add-ons like L change the worLd, another note, and the video games but like i said those are specific additions. i would have also added the one shot, the c-kira story and a-kira story, as well as the relights, light up the NEW world, differentiated the different versions of the musical but but but its okay. i know im rambling but really i do get it [”make it yourself!” no i already made 1 tierlist for this post and also i havent consumed enough of that media for it to be worth it])

ships:

gonna be honest when it comes to L’s successors (excluding B and A) i feel weird shipping them with anyone else BUT each other

i would have ranked b x a higher if a wasnt a briefly mentioned character with little dynamics or personality talked about, and i havent seen enough collective fanon of them to rank them anywhere other than mid

the first 2 tiers are preeetty closely ranked i just put lawlight in the first one because i consume more of it, also i probably would have moved some of these around (like moving kiyomisa down to ohio) but this is pretty old so thats my excuse (i was also kind of hard on matsulight i am so sorry)

musical songs: 

i dont hate any of the songs enough to put it in hunchback 2

also i need jarrod spector to sing an english version of the way things are i would cry. i put that in (the cheap, joking version of) my will but i accidentally said the way it ends and since it was an image that has since been plastered on multiple places its too late for me to fix it despite my efforts to correct it so oh well

ones i just genuinely cant remember were put in ohio (alongside the actual ohio songs) so if you see one in there that should definitely be ranked higher or lower that is why

i know a lot of people liked borrowed time but to me its just the simp version of titanium so i dont care that much

if i could rank the individual parts of secrets and lies i would be so grateful because the first part is pretty ohio but the last section is so boobs tier worthy that i just ended up averaging it out

i listen to the way it ends on loop every single morning

character themes:

this is the tier list i made and since i am very bad at making tier lists there are like 2 useless and unused images and its irritating but tiermaker says i cannot delete them so rip

kira’s theme is my favorite and while i know the three L themes up there are essentially the same thing they are also the same thing and i just put them next to each other

i played mello’s theme c while riding go karts once it was great

[burgertaco6]

back at it again in baldurs gate making it to the goblin shithole once religous hangout spot, i get a bit of closure on wether or not mindflayers have beaks (they dont) and save that scholar twink (no i did not have my eye plucked out)

hehehehehe funny hat :)

i gaslight the spiders into helping me along the way

after some more blind stumbling and the free of some prisoner guy being tortured later, i find druid boss, who is not too happy to have been replaced by kagha AND caught lacking by some goblins

during the breakout one of the goblin leaders just kind of got stuck in one spot with some other goblin and didnt move until the very last moments, only to get shoved in the spider pit and eaten alive whilst being shot at by everyone

i get weirdly kinky with this torturer guy, and afterwards brutally slaughter their buff red leader, stealing his limited edition spongebob gangsterpants merch collection

had PLENTY of shinies for my wonderful heat seeking missile man to absorb for his crack- i mean, magic addiction

my sarcasm about having the flu goes right over toad ladies head, leading me safely into the land of dreams where i learn what the make a guardian section meant and i forgot how GODDAMN UGLY I MADE HIM 😭look bear with me PLEASE there werent any dragonborn options for the guardian, if there were i woulda picked it in a heartbeat (coolass shot of dream worlds badass skeletor cave)

solve the easiest puzzle ever and baddabing badaboom im in the underdark, next thing i know rapheal pulls up offering to take the worm in my brain away which i say no to, let lae'zel cook smh

ngl was kind of sad there wasnt any flirting to do with THE sassy devil man directly calling me up on my brain phone with a spamton business offer

blocking his number, i obtain SHINY EXPENSIVE OBJECT!!!!! (almost got eaten by a very large ground worm thing along the way)

got to the village where i gladly accept to hunt down the mf who poisoned one of my fellow forest friends (dark gnome lady), spoke to the village leader guy he's pretty cool :)

and i meet one of my new FAVORITE CHARACTERS LIKE HOLY MOLY!!!!! OMMGGGGG big mushroom man.,.,.,. he looks so full of dirt and nutrients, if i prone someone they are just gonna be dead because he punches them to death VERY quickly

LOOK AT HIM!!! my boy 🥺✨ my man my THING, dweller of the dark, needs revenge. i will cry if he dies along the way in my journey for his vengeance thats all i've done so far, i'll supply more yummy insight on my playthrough as it goes, having some issues with crashing but i'll make it through a few underdark missions before returning to the druid grove, im sure they'll be fine up there seeing how all the goblins are drunk and their leaders are rotting on the ground <3

[eligaxy]

Wind

☆ℜ𝔢𝔩𝔞𝔱𝔦𝔬𝔫𝔰𝔥𝔦𝔭 : Venti x gn!Reader

☆𝔚𝔞𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔰 : near death experience, you’re confused asf about everything, bad writing cause i suck, spoilers for the we will be reunited quest!! And also for venti’s backstory, venti is serious for once (yes it’s a legitimate warning🤚)

☆𝔊𝔢𝔫𝔯𝔢 : Some angst, some fluff? Idk bye🤨

☆𝔖𝔲𝔪𝔪𝔞𝔯𝔶 : "It's okay, it's over now" he kneeled to be at your level, his arms still wrapped around you, and you didn't have the energy to fight your urge of nuzzling into him. "I'll always be here for you, wherever there is wind, remember I'm here too. You only need to ask." (2.8k words)

♪𝔑𝔬𝔱𝔢𝔰 : i’m an idiot simp, i did this in one sitting and half asleep, english isnt my first language BLA BLA IM SORRY FOR MY POOR WRITING BUT HAVE THIS

basically you don’t know if you can trust venti or not, head says no, heart screams yes

Also, I was listening to stormterror’s lair ost while writing it, just because its fucking amazing, you might wanna listen to it too

I’m nervous to post this?/&:! This is the second fic i’ve ever finished in my whole life

i love venti and he’s hot in his god outfit i don’t make the rules

KAY ENJOY <3

✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧

"Please, anybody... Just help me."

Saying you were exhausted would have been an understatement. After reuniting with your sibling, you had been frantically searching for clues about khaenri'ah and ways to Inazuma. With no luck, you couldn't find any traces of Dainsleif or of your twin. The ruins had been sealed and you had no idea what happened to the inverted statue or the corpse you had found there. Desperately, you clung into every little information you had, you would have turned every rock on this archon damned continent if you had to, which is what led you into those ruins near Guilli plains.

Walking along the destroyed buildings your eyes caught sight of a dandelion and you froze. You missed them so much, why couldn't they go back home with you? All you ever wanted was to be by their side why, why were they running away from you?

You remembered your travels, the moments you shared together, their protectiveness over you, the fondness in their eyes when you smiled at them. You remember the times you got hurt and healed one another with your now missing powers. You remember sleeping by their side and being grateful to the universe to let you keep your ray of sunshine everywhere with you. How ironic.

What had they meant 'once you reach the end of your journey' ? What does that even mean? Stupid twin, if they knew you were here the whole time, why hadn't they come to you? Why were they always leaving just when they were within your grasp? Why? Did they know how much you missed them and how much your heart broke when you finally saw them? Did they?

You only realized you were crying when a small gust of wind had your wet cheek react to the cold, breaking your train of thought. Wind.

The wind is everywhere, you think, free as a bird, always accompanying every citizen of this world, never truly alone. With this in mind, you resumed your exploring, slower this time.

A sigh escaped your mouth. You didn't want to admit it, but the wind did comfort you a little. Almost as if he was here. God of freedom and of the breeze, he was more a singer than a protector and you couldn't bear to think about him. Was it true? What Dain said... Did he destroy this nation? Was he the cause of the scenery that still haunted your nightmares up until 500 years later? Your brain simply couldn't accept that Venti, your Venti, you catch yourself thinking, could have made such an act of wrath. He was the epitome of freedom, why would he take the very thing he based all of his existence on from mere mortals? Barbatos simply couldn't be afraid of being overpowered, he didn't even care about power. All he wanted was freedom and happiness for his people. Surley this couldn't be right?

But then again, who were you to deny the wipe out of an entire nation? The gods did it. They were afraid that Celestia would be overthrown by the pride of humankind, the destruction of khaenri'ah by divine beings was a fact. There was no misunderstanding about this. That was the one thing you were sure of. So why did you feel like crying even more now?

The mere thought of a gentle soul such as Venti committing innocent people to an eternity of suffering didn't sit right with you. Even when his dearest friend Dvalin had turned against him, he didn't try to stop him, didn't even ask the dragon to save him. He healed and helped him, gave him a choice.

'What is freedom if demanded of you by a god?' was the same person that asked this question the same one who committed mass murder? Genocide?

Did the little wine-lover bard you had grown fond of destroy all hopes and light your kin had?

You remember that night when he freed Stanley from his burden, freed his and his friends' spirits. You had marveled at his action, in that instant he was a god, and he definitely hadn't struck you as a murderer. You remember that look of silent pain and grief in his eyes when he sang the tales of the nameless bard he had taken the appearance of. You knew he trusted you enough to share his story, something so personal, you could almost feel the war that took down the tyrant of Mond. Oh how much you cherished that evening, treating him to some well deserved dandelion wine afterwards, his favorite, and asking him to sing you more about the time where was nothing but the spirit of a breeze.

Your heart broke a little, remembering his rosy cheeks and drunk smile, you wish you could talk to him, ask him what happened. What did he do, was he really as dangerous as you had been told? If so, then why did you feel so good around him? Why did you feel like you could give hi-

You stopped walking upon seeing a ruin guard up ahead in the distance. You're so stupid, you think. Feeling this way is not gonna get you anywhere, especially with how the bard had been missing for a few weeks now. Ever since you had last seen your sibling.

Where was he, where was he wandering off to? You walk towards the disabled ruin guard, not really paying any mind to it, still thinking about the god you longed to meet with. If you could see him, what would you even say? Would he even answer your questions? Why did your stomach feel so light and funny when you thought about seeing him, why aren't you angrier?

You're almost at the killing machine's level now, so lost in your thought you don't notice the five other similar robots hidden behind a wall next to it. You notice them only when it's too late and you've already turned them on while thinking about examining them and collecting their serial numbers. When you hear the familiar tick of the mechanism turning on, you internally panic and think about running away only to calm down moments later and think to yourself that you can simply beat it and take what you came here for. Even if you are emotionally and physically tired, you can manage, you think.

That was before hearing five other consecutive ticks right after it, and all around you.

Turning around, your gaze falls upon the small army of field tillers. Fuck.

Paimon wasn't with you today, you had asked for some time alone which she hesitantly accepted, so you couldn't ask her to go fetch help. You would have been worried if you had all your capacities but with the state you were in, you were wondering how you were going to survive this fight. You were alone, none of your companions with you, and deeply weakened by the busy day you had and the few hours of sleep you had managed to steal away from the night. Was it today you would meet your doom, with all your questions and uncertainties unanswered?

You tried your best to fight with the strength you had left, but quickly grew desperate after what felt like hours of efforts to swing your blade and being able to only take one monster down out of the six. It didn't help that you got injured along the way, their blows becoming harder and harder to dodge. After being thrown on the grown for the third time, you understood you had at least two broken ribs and that your shaking legs would soon fail you as well.

Fear crept upon you, you would die here today, alone. Alone. You couldn't talk to your sibling after all, couldn't understand. You didn't even get to talk to him one last time. Him... You would die without the knowledge of the truth about your bard. You would die alone. You didn't want that, you couldn't look death straight in the eye.

"Please, anybody... Just help me."

-

In Mondstadt, there was a musician, a weird singer everyone had heard about at least once. He lived off of his songs and was mostly known for having a great story-telling and being an alcoholic.

The number of people who knew the true nature of his identity were few and he was perfectly content with that. He didn't wish to be a god anymore, his gnosis had been taken away anyway and it's not like he had any power over the city of wind nowadays. Even if his people still worshipped him as Barbatos, it didn't sit right with him to be called a god anymore. It actually never did, he thinks to himself with a smile, he never really took any responsibilities that came with the divine title which is why he was so weak today. But it didn't matter to him, his smile turns into a soft giggle.

Sitting on a mill that was once born from his steps he looks fondly over the city he founded. Even if they were godless, the citizens were still thriving and free. He cared oh so very deeply about the place even if he rarely, if not never, showed the affection within his heart. He remembers the day he grew strong enough to dispel the storms over his actual Mondstadt, and made the weather gentle enough so that there was no need for fireplaces. Nowadays, he loves watching birds nest into the chimney tops and seeing them found their own home. It gave him a sense of belonging like no other, not above his people, but walking among them and watching them nest into this cocoon he created. He was proud of what happened to his land and would do it all over again if he had to.

Especially since it led to him meeting you. This thought doesn't catch him off guard, you often roamed around in his mind after all, and it's not like he didn't write at least three songs about you and your feat, your smile, your courage...

Ah there he goes again, rambling about you in a whisper. He turns around to the statue of him his people erected in his honor, chuckling at how they never made the connection with his signature braids. His, but not really his, since he had stolen this form from someone who was much more deserving of this power than him. Seeing his friend being honored with the statues of the seven around the land made him happy, he hoped that it was a good enough thank you gift in return for everything that the bard whom he couldn't even remember the name of anymore did for him.

Upon gazing at the statue, he remembered telling you of his long gone friend. It was the first time he had talked about him to someone else, he didn't even mention it to Venessa, she who made him believe in himself again. He could ask himself why, but he simply knew that you had something different, more than meets the eye. Perhaps it was because you weren't from Teyvat, or perhaps it was just you being as simple as your natural self but he was simply and utterly captivated by your being. You inspired him to no end, at first he thought it was because he had never met someone like you and he loved new things! But as time grew and he got to know you, he understood quickly the meaning and depth of his passions. He thought of it with a light chuckle, content with your presence alone. He really did need and want you around.

So why did he purposely avoid you like the plague?

The wind had brought to his ears that you had met with Dainsleif.

And your twin.

His first reaction was to search for you, talk to you, he wanted to be here to know what happened! You had searched so long, he couldn't contain himself, still listening to what the wind told him, he started running with excitement but... But wait, Dainsleif was... He told you what?

Oh.

So you heard about Khaenri'ah. He had stopped dead in his tracks and turned back, only sending a warm current of wind your way, hugging you from afar.

He wasn't ready to talk about this yet, not ready to face you and absolutely not ready to answer your questions. He was a coward, he thought, running away like that but what else could he do, really. It was only natural for him to be as uncatchable as air.

A sorry excuse to avoid the fact that even if his past had marvelous story like the one of the nameless bard, it also had its share of darkness, something he wasn't ready to dive back into. Especially not now when your arrival has been shaking this world up like it hasn't been since at least 500 years.

But oh, how he longed to see your face or to hear your voice. So he asked a breeze to report to him what you were up to, and where you were. Just in case! he tells himself, what if you needed help ehe? But he knows you're competent and you won't need the help of a weakling coward like him anytime soon. Or so he thought.

Because when the breeze only gives him a few words back, his blood runs cold.

"Please, anybody... Just help me."

-

As you murmured these words in your desperate state, not really for anyone but yourself as a last resort, a prayer of some sort, you tried to stand by leaning yourself on your sword and failing miserably. You didn't dare look up as you heard the loud footsteps of the metal giants coming your way. It was over, and you barely managed to accept it.

As you rested your forehead against the cold handle of your sword, you closed your eyes, tears starting to make their ways out of your closed eyelids. All you could feel was remorse.

A soft breeze moved your hair slightly and your chest felt like a black hole had taken place where your heart used to be, regretting to not have been able to meet him under the tree at Windrise one last time.

The breeze quickly grew stronger, until it felt unnatural and you looked up from the ground, only to close your eyes again immediately when you realized the wind was too powerful for you to keep them open. If you had struggled to see though, you would have been blinded by the white light that soon illuminated the whole ruins. You didn't have enough time to register the situation when you felt a hand being laid atop your shoulder, snaking around your collarbones and pulling you back into... nothing? Another arm circled your weak form and a voice you immediately recognized said

"I've dealt with things worse than you, now crumble."

You realized that if you couldn't feel a chest behind you while still being embraced by his arms, it was because he was floating above you, and not standing behind you. A look in his direction confirmed your suspicions but what stunned you wasn't the fact that he was flying, but the attire he wore. Barely covering his body, a white set made of materials that seemed like clouds and liquid gold contrasted perfectly with his regular green clothes. His hair was glowing green and his eyes that were focused on the ruin guards up ahead had a marvelous shine that you had never seen before. He had that same aura he did the night he freed Stanley, but there was also something different about the way his hands gripped you a little too tightly or the way his voice sounded.

"Venti.." You muttered his name, relief and affection flooding you all at once, in his presence you felt as if nothing bad could happen to you. How foolish could you be, just a few hours ago you were speculating wether or not he had wiped out an entire civilisation and now here you were, being saved by him and feeling safer than you had in months.

"Close your eyes, I don't want give you a headache" he said, slowly floating legs first towards the ground. His unusually serious voice surprised you (and him) but you did as he told you. Letting go of your sword and leaning back into him, you let him deal with the monsters ahead of you.

"It's okay, it's over now" he kneeled to be at your level, his arms still wrapped around you, and you didn't have the energy to fight your urge of nuzzling into him. "I'll always be here for you, wherever there is wind, remember I'm here too. You only need to ask."

Being protected by a god really didn't feel that bad. Especially when you were in love with said god.

✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧

Thank you so much for reading whatever this is until the end :’)

Don’t hesitate to comment or reblog, tysm <3

Ps: venti loves u and so do i do pls take care of urself mwah

[chasingfictions]

As a resident spuffy expert here on tumblr dot com. I absolutely NEED your Thoughts on what songs would fit on a playlist for them… asking for a friend..

BESTIE you have come to the right place . not to brag but i have an unhinged number of btvs playlists i have 3 for spuffy alone. dkjfdsf i am going to use a random number generator to pick spuffy songs from those hang on bestie hang on

vintage - blu detiger // Always holds the door but I found him in a mosh pit / Way too dressed to kill, how I feel

just a lover - hayley williams // Really hope we don't wreck this / When you coming over?

ivy - taylor swift // Oh, I can't stop you putting roots in my dreamland / My house of stone, your ivy grows, and now I'm covered in you

oh no - softee // What if I did it? / What if I kissed you right here? / And what if you felt it? / What if you felt the way I felt about you?

howl - florence + the machine // My blood is singing with your voice, I want to pour it out / The saints can't help me now, the ropes have been unbound / I hunt for you with bloody feet across the hallowed ground

killer + the sound - phoebe bridgers, abby gundersen, noah gundersen // Can the killer in me / Tame the fire in you? / I know there's something waiting for us / I am sick of the chase / But I'm stupid in love / And there's nothing I can do

super trouper - abba // So I'll be there when you arrive / the sight of you will prove to me I'm still alive / and when you take me in your arms, and hold me tight / I know it's gonna mean so much tonight

please stay - lucy dacus // I think you mean what you say / When you say you wanna die / I think you mean what you say / When you say you want to stay alive

sweetest devotion - adele // I find it funny that you're the only one I never looked for / There is something in your loving that tears down my walls / I wasn't ready then, I'm ready now, I'm heading straight for you

kerina - adrianne lenker // You don't want me, honey / Just 'cause I wanted you / Caught in the turning / Losing my mind / Lose what I'm learning / When I'm calling you all the time

be sweet - japanese breakfast // Be sweet to me, baby / I wanna believe in you / I wanna believe in something

leaning on you - haim // It takes all that I got / Not to fuck this up / So won't you let me know / If I'm not alone / Leaning on you

heat wave - linda ronstadt // Whenever I'm with him / Something inside / Starts to burning / And I'm filled with desire / Could it be the devil in me / Or is this the way love's supposed to be

good old fashioned lover boy - queen // I can dim the lights and sing you songs full of sad things / We can do the tango just for two

say it - maggie rogers // I knew it when you looked my way / That I'd be begging you to stay / I couldn't say it to myself

wicked game - chris isaak // What a wicked thing to do, to make me dream of you / And I don't wanna fall in love

fast as you can - fiona apple // I let the beast in too soon / I don't know how to live without my hand on his throat / I fight him always and still / O darling, it's so sweet

big god - florence + the machine // Shower your affection, let it rain on me / Don't leave me on this white cliff

from eden - hozier // Babe, there's something wretched about this / Something so precious about this / Where to begin?

lover - taylor swift // I take this magnetic force of a man to be my lover / My heart's been borrowed and yours has been blue / All's well that ends well to end up with you / Swear to be overdramatic and true to my lover / And you'll save all your dirtiest jokes for me / And at every table, I'll save you a seat, lover

also literally all of the buffering the vampire slayer songs that are just. about spuffy. something blue, fool for love, crush, intervention, smashed, as you were, entropy <3333 also the s7 ones that havent been released as full albums yet bc the podcast is still doing that season <333 but the one for sleeper already made me cry. also the one for never leave me is im pretty sure a spuffy song but it's not released yet. also touched is um. gonna kill me i know it. also highkey the songs for lovers walk and school hard are cute.

[lovemikage]

any of the party/teens as wedding guests >>>>like lets say its jopper for convenience’s sake right? the hotel everyone’s in (def some shitty 1 and a half star, “A HOBO IN OUR BATHTUB” type beat) is on full lockdown for the days leading up to the wedding bc if there is trouble to be found team hawkins is gonna find it. the morning of while everyone’s getting ready the girls are so chill. there’s a throwback playlist going while everyone’s doing hair and makeup, they loaded up the free hotel breakfast so they’re just having a nice calm morning before crazy wedding stuff needs to happen.

the BOYS however???? terrible. fucking terrible. mike didnt bring a fucking belt so his suit pants are falling down and steve bitches the entire car ride to like target or some shit to find him one bc “i TOLD YOU TO DOUBLE CHECK”. will is having a panic attack in the bathroom writing and rewriting his speech for the reception and oh whats that sound?? BOOM he just passed the fuck out there on the bathroom floor but no one hears bc eddie and argyle’s dumb asses decided to combine their one brain cell and bring edibles to the reception but theyre gonna be ~sneaky~ and keep them in their pockets. dustin sees one unsupervised and is “oh sick a rice krispies treat, hey eddie this tastes weird???” eddie and argyle scream so loud the front desk gets complaints. jonathan this entire time has been having a heart to heart w hopper outside the hotel, its really sweet, they hug and maybe cry shh, but then they come back in and mike and steve are missing, eddie and argyle are frantically looking through the phone book for the number to poison control while dustin stares up from the couch at the ceiling on fucking JUPITER bc eddie and argyle martha stewarted that shit and made it potent, will is limping out of the bathroom fully green. hopper has never been so close to a heart attack in his life.

why are you so good at making up situations that make me lose my mind this is so fucking funny. lucas sneaked out to see max and he comes back to literal hell im fucking SOBUFNDJCKSKVK

[ennoshawty]

HQ CAPTAINS AS THINGS

i was bored and felt like doing a crackfic thing but i didn’t have any solid themes or good ideas

SO I PRESENT TO YOU - THE CAPTAINS. AS THINGS. IDK HOW TO WORD THIS BUT YOU’LL SEE AS WE GO ALONG.

warnings: VERY LONG, slandering a crybaby oikawa (lovingly), mentions f!reader, shitposting, mentions of violence in kita's, (a bit) yandere!kita, cursing, unedited, me being an idiot

officer!daichi

we are: vigilante/troublemaker

loving the enemies-to-lovers trope so much

nah bro you ain’t full criminal (bc my preppy ass could never) you just do the small vandalism things y’know like drawing peepees on government buildings and knocking over bins

u literally confessed to him by spraypainting the entire billboard by his workplace “I LIKE YOU” like way to go girl

He didn’t appreciate the creative graffiti but he rlly likes u so all u had to do was clean it and then next thing u know yall are out on a cute cafe date

but let’s talk about before yall got together

he’d CHASE u thru alleyways when he’d catch you writing “police sux” on the fuckin wall

bro is NOT AT ALL afraid to jump onto the roofs it’s FRIGHTENING to see this huge ass police officer storm after u

HES SO FAST HOT DAMN WOMAN HOW DO U GET AWAY FROM HIM??? USAIN BOLT WHOMST???

you’d almost always get away by a hair - he’s SO SO close

and it frustrates him but excites u oooooo arrest me shawty

and this would continue for a while

but yall have such fun fun banter - you’d tease him and he’d say something back and you’d bolt and he’d chase

some days he’d catch you. but in those times u slip away somehow

he’s having so much fun and doesn’t even know it

and then at one point he doesn’t even care about bringing u to justice anymore. he knows it’s bad for business and it’s unprofessional but he’s so attracted to u

he doesn’t even know it. HES IN DENIAL!!! his mind: “oh i’m just asking about her so that i know her motives” bruh no u just asked about our fav pastry this aint about crime anymore

and when he finally gets it,,,DINGDINGDINGDING SOUND THE ALARMS !!! MAN IS WHIPPED!! he’s more shy around u awww,,,doesn’t even want to chase u anymore but he will still engage in banter w u.

yall get a little peace treaty in the lil crush stage - you both are kinda aware of ur feelings towards each other but don't really wanna mess it up and jeopardize whatever's going on like bros PLEASE JUST KISS ITS INFURIATING

it’s more of a competition to see who will break the other first (and you lost he’s too hot)

he lets u joyride his cop car in an empty parking lot <3 he is the one <3 this is true love

u gotta marry him right now bro no excuses

u are no longer on the crime side of the law,,,u support him and only him fuck the rest of the cops (i’m jk of course...or am i)

u are his badass sidekick <3 unofficially of course until he marries u

u help him with the small things like helping lost children find their parents and helping old ladies cross the street

but you want to do the FUN stuff - chasing thieves and arresting drunkards.

unfortunately, he loves u too much to put u in danger so he keeps u from doing the dangerous things

after some protesting later, he trusts u to take care of urself. and now yall have a competition just like old times - whoever catches the most baddies at the end of the month wins (he WILL scold u if ur too reckless though)

THE TWO OF U ARE JUST GOOD COP BAD COP UHAHAHAHAHAHA

but it’s much more complicated than that - it’s either ur the laidback one and he’s the strict one or ur the fiery one and he’s the person like “calm down”

PLEASE HE HATES BRINGING U TO INTERROGATIONS he’s trying to be serious but you keep making him laugh istg he has to kick u out each time

u still make him laugh when u pout-glare at him thru the glass

bro says he’s not the stereotypical cop but the moment u surprise him with donuts and coffee in the morning he will make out w u right then and there

even though yall dating he still won’t let u play with his equipment

but sometimes u grab his walkie talkie when he’s not looking and prank call the others

and his coworkers know by now they’re like “oh it’s daichis gf” and go along with it HAHAHAHA “this is alpha 1, daichi just contracted ligma, over.” “roger, but what’s ligma? over.” “*inhale* LIGMA-” *daichi takes the walkie talkie back*

his coworkers are chill lmaoooo they love u two as a couple THEY ARE VERY SUPPORTIVE they planned a surprise anniversary party of when u joined the force (unofficially)

the juniors tanaka and noya are jelly ooooo but they respect their captain <3

u loooooove hanging out w the starry-eyed new recruit hinata and he’s bouncing around asking u personal questions “how did you date the commander!!! what’s he like as a bf??” he also accidentally exposes how much daichi talks about u in the office before he drags him away and murders him off camera

he does get u a walkie talkie that’s just connected to his line, tho. for emergencies. it’s ur second phone basically that only has his number in it

daichi LOVES it when u massage him after he’s had a long day but his shoulders are stiff as a statue,,,he’s also super stronk and can carry u anywhere <333

IMAGINE HE HAS A POLICE DOG - he doesn’t, but he’ll get one of his buddies to bring u a k9 unit so u can pet it and when he sees how happy u are he considers getting one PLSSS IT WOULD FIT HIM HELPPP

bro is VERY strict on safety. bulletproof glass in yalls house. alarms + cameras everywhere. trackers on every device. underground bunker. (just kidding lol)

daichi teaches u self-defense and gets u a bejeweled taser for ur bday <333 MARRY THIS MAN RIGHT NOW OR I’LL-

in other words i love daichi and he is husband material WIFE ME UP BUDDY

househusband!oikawa

we are: girlboss sugar mommy

somehow you tamed this bish to becoming your obedient malewife

and by obedient i mean whiny but compliant

IS MORE ATTACHED TO YOUR BLACK CARD THAN TO YOU. I SAID IT. THE TRUTH.

sure, he’s pretty and gives affection sometimes but the only time he’s bein cute and snuggly w u is when a new fendi purse came out and he wants it

his specialty is cooking but he’s so lazy he’s all “just get the maid to do it”

please give ur workers a raise he’s so demanding

when you take him to ur business parties hes ALWAYS bragging about you and ur large house with this and that and his favorite: indoor hot tub. he always brings up the indoor hot tub.

only reason you bring him is cuz he’s pretty and he whines when you leave him alone for too long

yall cant even stay for too long - he’ll practically drag u out of the building and whining that it’s too hot and his suit is too stuffy and to call a limo

he’s not afraid to embarrass u if u dont give him what he wants and he will spit out food at a formal dinner if its not to his liking

probably in competition w househusbands! makki and mattsun about who gets the best house so he’s constantly begging u for an extension to the house “please babe!!! makki has-” “no.”

8/10 times throws tantrums in public and 1465/10 times throws tantrums in the house

he wants to cry for the sake of crying. one time he lost his shirt and he wouldn’t stop bawling for 15 min

please find him a hobby

crybaby . the moment u give him the glare of death it’s over. but he’s got a cute crying face which makes up for his annoying whimpering

like he made the mistake of throwing a temper tantrum in the mall only for you to glare at him with a look that said “we’re discussing this when we get home and you’re gonna get your ass beat” and walk away. immediately stopped what he was doing and he was running after u, sniffling and mumbling apologies

please humble him and have him sleep outside. the couch is too luxurious to banish him to. he made sure of it himself. it’s reclining and has charging ports. he will not learn his lesson that way

does NOT want you to get a pet or a kid or even another sugar baby/househusband - he wants to be the center of ur attention

speaking of which he HATES it when you work for too long or work overseas. when u come back he’ll pout at u and give u the petty silent treatment

don’t bother trying to comfort him he thrives off of it and he’ll keep going so u can keep paying attention to him. if u just ignore him back he’ll come crawling back to u. “WHY ARE YOU IGNORING ME IGNORING YOU?? DO YOU EVEN LOVE ME ANYMORE???”

one time yall got into a fight and he was all like “since ur being a rude mommy i’ll just find someone else !!!” inside u were like “oh god finally” but instead u said “okay”

ohmygod he panicked. he was rlly expecting for u to fight for him,,, but he doesn’t want to admit defeat first so he tries to go thru with it but you literally dont care. even when he has his chanel luggage packed and he’s standing by the door ur just like “ok bye bitch”

So he’s trying to stand by the door and wait for u to say that ur joking. ur not.

“fine! I’m leaving now!” “okay.” “...*sniffles*” “tooru, go.” “WAAAAH NO IM SORRY I DONT WANT TO-”

u knew this was going to happen sadly. u even hid the keys to all of the sports cars u own just in case he was actually going to go thru with it

tries to get in the gossip circle with the neighborhood trophy wives but they don’t think he’s cool enough. they like u though. they think ur hot asf and oikawa doesn’t like them no more bc theyre hitting on his ATM. but thanks to that u know all the gossip and shit even though u don’t ask for it

Every time u pass by a store where he thinks he wants something he’ll just cling to u and give the puppy dog eyes. like it could be out of nowhere and u see it and you’re like “where. which store.”

bro once he went luxury he never went back. he wouldn’t EVER step foot into a grocery store ever again congrats he’s been bimbo-ified

beat him with ur gucci belt pls it’s so funny

also please please PLEASE discipline him. tell him it’s NOT okay to just randomly purchase the entire swarovski store or to throw a party at ur house just bc he’s feeling petty about u being at work for too long. ofc he’ll bitch about it but you need to be firm

but don’t worry,,,he’ll get the idea when u take away black card privileges and slap him around (lovingly)

now he has to ask permission like a good boy. he’ll kneel and hug u and give a lil pout and whine

you got a bigass man child i’m sorry maam u should’ve picked tobio or ushi

ceo!kuroo

we are: secretary

bruh keeps it mostly professional during work hours

but that all gets shedded off like a snake when we on break

one minute he’s all “get these papers done by today or i swear on all that is holy i will destroy you” and then later he’s all “hey sweetheart wanna grab a cup of coffee”

flirty flirty FLIRTY FLIRTY AAAAA HES A MENACE

but you’re less than impressed bc y’know when the time clocks out and its time to go back to work he’s ruthless once more

HUMBLE HIM FOOL only when you’re on break though

will NOT stand for anyone else in the workplace bullyin u - NO WAY. only HIM

he’s got TONS and TONS of dirt on everyone in the office - NO ONE is safe so they wouldn’t even dare

RIP janet from accounting

that dumb bitch made the mistake of insulting u to ur face and in front of him. never heard from her again

it’s not even limited to the other employees - he’s not afraid to go off on a potential business partner if they dared disrespect you

bruh tries to call u on ur off days for the most randomest shit and to get ur attention

*picks up phone* “sir?” “ah! my favorite secretary ever! listen, i need you to grab my pens from my desk at the office and bring them to my place.” “...with all due respect, it’s 2 am, sir.”

but u have to comply with his ridiculous demands cuz he’s the bank

and he depends on u completely. as much as he hates to admit it - u have his schedules, itinerary, provide coffee, performance rates, stock info, you name it.

once u were out sick and he had the worst management - he’s not used to working without you

def tries to get some of ur workload off of u bc he’s worried that the stress of working for him made u sick + he doesn’t want to go thru scheduling again

prolly gets bored in meeting rooms and sends u little smirks and wiggles his eyebrows and weird looks while he’s sitting and ur standing in the corner like bruh pay attention

maybe sometimes he’s secretly makin fun of the presenter and doodling on his spare sticky note something funny to make u crack a smile

he’ll tease u for it of course “oh, secretary! you should be paying more attention! what would you do if this was important?” bruh i can multitask now keep airdropping me ur selfies i’m saving all of them (news flash: u dont save his dumbass selfies otherwise his ego will inflate too much)

sometimes likes to pull u aside from work to hug u - you say it’s highly unprofessional but he says it’s his stress reliever

you ALMOST got caught by one of the newbies and he was kabedon-ing you

he tries to play it off (since u were embarrassed too) but u know better,,,DO NOT LET HIM FORGET ABOUT IT he turns red and embarrassed every single time USE THIS TO UR ADVANTAGE !!

never goes into an elevator without you bruh is so attached to u n holds the doors open for you

but you have to open normal doors for him if he doesn’t know how it works (hint: manual doors. “why isn’t it opening on its own?” “sir, there’s a handle.” “but?? what does it do??”)

bruh acts like a dumbass sometimes so you can baby him :/// wtf man just because you’re rich doesn’t mean i’ll- ...wait...how much did you say…? that many zeros? HAND ME THAT FORK YES I’LL FEED YOU COME HERE- HERE COMES THE AIRPLANE BITCH

brings u to overseas trips and he spoils u too

no matter how much you insist that you’re ok he gives u a lot of luxurious items. “think of it as a bonus from me.” NOW YOU JUST HAVE A COLLECTION OF NICE SHOES/BAGS/JEWELRY AND HE LOVES IT WHEN YOU WEAR THEM TO WORK IT MAKES HIM SO HAPPY UGHHHHH

BRUH just a sugar daddy at this point “you have to look presentable for the next focus group so here’s a nice rolex watch” “sir, i don’t need-” “ah ah ah - it’s my treat.”

it’s pointless to refuse him but he still teases u for it like what???? “if i didn’t know any better, secretary, i’d say you’re just doing it for my money and not my fabulous looks and personality.” “exactly.” “hey!”

yall go for drinking parties a lot. whether with the whole branch or just the two of u

KARAOKE W KUROO AFTER A LONG DAY OF WORK <333 becomes a ritual between the two of u

he’s so silly when he’s drunk lmfaoooo goofy ass mf

but that’s only when it’s the two of u. he controls his alcohol around others and his uncool side is only for u <3

also ur the only one he trusts to take him back to his place and handle him

it’s the other way around too - when u drink a lot he looks after you <333

you have a higher tolerance than him and sometimes u have competitions between the two of u on who can drink more but then yall always end up shitfaced

HES the one who has a crush on you

you know the drill - gaslight gatekeep girlboss

he’ll do anything for u but wouldn’t ever admit it he simp

offers u the keys to his estate and offers for you to LIVE with him

bruh just marry me already ok WAIT WE’RE NOT EVEN DATING YOU NEED TO WORK ON THAT SIR-

he’s so awkward tryna confess to u,,,he may be this big hotshot ceo but he’s acting like a schoolgirl in love

probably prints u a confession when he asks u to go to the fax machine lmfao what a nerd

in other words ceo!kuroo is a nerd and you need to top him immediately get that bank

dog hybrid!bokuto

we are: owner

Husky-malamute breed!!! BEEG DOGGIE VERY HAPPY N DROOLY <333

OVERLY HYPER. JUMPS ON ANYONE AND U AT ANY GIVEN MOMENT

he’s well trained i swear but the moment he sees something of interest then i’m sorry you just lost him

please if a robber came in he wouldn’t even attack them he’d just tackle them w hugs

he loves loves loves snuggles <333 u busy? nope!!! hug time!!! cooking something?? oo lemme see!!! whoops look at all those tomatos on the ground. u got a deadline coming up and u really need to focus?? CUDDLE TIIIIIIME- w-wait - huh?? why are u shoving me off?? do you - do you not - huh?!?! WHY ARE YOU LOCKING ME OUT OF THE ROOM?? NO!!!! I LOVE YOU!!! IDK WHAT EXAMS ARE BUT I WANT CUDDLES!!! HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME????!!!

the WORST things u could ever do to him is leave him and call him a bad boy

HE CRIES ON THE SPOT </3 HOW COULD YOU </3

soso bummed when u go out of the house without him </333 waits by the door patiently waiting for u to come back </333 sob sob

the moment he hears the door unlock he LEAPS and his tail is wagging like CRAZY

he is SO STRONG. almost always knocks u over whenever he jumps on u

destroys EVERY toy u bring him. u leave him for 5 seconds and there’s stuffing all over the floor and whatever u brought him is nonexistent

tugs on the leash when u walk so much that it SNAPS

loves romping w the other dogs in the dog park but he needs to tone down on his friendliness he almost killed a lil orange chihuahua

gets distracted by EVERYTHING. ooh, squirrel! oo, butterfly! OOO HUMAN CHILD!! MUST EAT!!!

ok while he might be friendly, he still gets super super jealous. you both were outside and u were petting the neighborhood black cat and bruh almost swallowed his head

which u thought was weird bc the two are normally friends and are pretty nice around each other

so now he’s more feisty around him and any other cat that’d get ur attention

If it was a person, then that’s another thing. He’d be very friendly at first but then slowly realize that ur attention is more directed on them than him. then he’d go ballistic

but when u scold him for practically assaulting the poor dude and call him a bad boy,,,he’s lost it

u have to lock him in the other room and he’s crying and whimpering, scratching at the door. all he wanted to do was protect u from that bad bad man who took away his owner’s attention !!!

def snarls at the dude next time he comes into ur house/apartment...dude never came back

“GRRR” “AAAA GET UR FRIGGIN DOG B-” “he don bite” YES IT DO GET UR-”

doggie bokuto rlly tries to be slick...it doesn’t work. like he tries to do that thing when he’s a total demon towards the guy but then act like an angel around u but it doesnt work bc he’s not smooth

doggie intelligence: 2 IQ. one time u got him a puzzle box and hid a treat in it but bruh couldnt figure it out just straight up monched the entire puzzle simply bc he smelled his fav bbq treat in it

speaking of intelligence - he only knows how to say a few words like ur name and incomplete sentences. speaks in barks and whines and sometimes a word

SO BIG THAT HE GRABS FOOD FROM THE TABLE WHEN YOU’RE NOT LOOKING

u had some delicious beef steak? oh dear, where did it go? there’s ur puppy kou with steak sauce all over his lips

big fan of hiking trips, sports, literally anything that involves going out

he LOVES getting dirty outside playing. boi cant control himself from rolling around in the mud

hates baths at first but then he likes how u spray the water on him and giggles awww he likes bath time now

we all know he’s not the brightest pup of the pack but,,,he’s somehow psychic. he knows when ur taking him to the vet

HE THROWS A BIG FUSS ALL THE TIME - sometimes he tries to hide but his huge tail under the couch gives it away

and he knows when ur thinking of taking him on a walk. he also begs u to take him outside by settling his head in ur lap and pouting until u give him what he wants

he likes the big ol doggie sweaters/pjs u buy him...but he always ruins them. no matter how much u buy him, they’re all ruined. he complains how scratchy it is and it feels weird on him

knows LOTS of tricks but if u teach him more than what he already knows he will forget one of them he’s like a damn pokemon

he feels ur emotions :((( if ur mood is down his tail droops :(( and he gives u cuddles and tries to make u feel better

he even likes to make a fool out of himself and be silly if it makes u laugh :((( he’s so precious

in other words i love doggy bokuto

pirate!ushijima

we are: kidnapped

ah yes we’re are captives of the most fearsome pirates of the seas: shiratorizawa

just so you know, tendou was the instigator. he was all “let’s kidnap a noble’s kid and get the ransom money!” (whether you actually are a noble or not is up to you)

thing is, nobody’s willing to pay (if you aren’t a noble) or the pirates really pissed off the folks in charge and are now doing a manhunt

so yeah you aren’t going back anytime soon

but he’s a pretty good sport about it - very hospitable

he notices the little things u like and gets them for u <333 sighs <333

he saw you reading that book? wow look at that, there’s suddenly a stack of them and the same genre he saw you reading

but you definitely shouldn’t test him. he’s SUPER scary when it comes down to it

you saw how ruthless he was with the rogues that had dared to challenge him on sea

mf made them walk the plank

you help on the ship bc u wanna be useful and also shirabu keeps being mean

he asks u to teach the crew how to read cuz theyre dumb as shit and only know water and treasure

speaking of treasure - when he leaves u on the ship to explore a cave, he gets u really pretty jewelry <33 anything u ask for

“oh, welcome back captain. how was your mission?” “i brought back a few trinkets i thought you might like.” *reveals whole chest of priceless gems* “are they to your liking? if not, we can set sail for something else that might interest you.” “I-”

bruh got a pet eagle - u ask the crew and they dont even know how tf it happened

hell, even he doesn’t know how it happened wtf. “oh. one day it flew down to me and i fed it. that’s all.” wtf

equivalent to diluc’s bird - he didn’t even give it a name so he gives u the honors

U name him rigatoni (you got a great naming sense btw)

oh my god oh my god oh my god HE TRIES TO PROTECT U WHEN PPL WERE TRYNA INVADE THE SHIP

it was the first thing he did no cap - burst into ur room and scoops u up <33333

“what the-” “we need to get you to safety. we are under attack.” and holds u close to his chest AAAHSIDHFPSDHFN OH MY LORD YES

HAS THE TEAM GIVE U SELF DEFENSE LESSONS AFTER THAT

tendou tries to give u a sword but ushi says no “she could hurt herself.”

“but ushiwaka! we can teach her not to hurt herself” “...it’s my orders.” “c’mon, be more honest, ushiwaka! what’s the real reason?”

he goes quiet then looks at u “...i’ll always be there to help. she’ll have me.” AOISHSDHFSNDF

HELPPPPP SIOJFDSKFJP HES SO CHARMING AND HE DOESNT EVEN TRY

but the rest of the crew are like “then what’s the point”

but tendou sneaks u a dagger just to be safe

sorry ur apart of the crew now - but they’re like a family even if they did kidnap u

oh whatever your life before wasn’t as cool as this (no offense)

they are given orders to protect u at all costs

speaking of which - ushi isn’t all that great w guns

almost blew his own head off tryna figure out how it works before reon snatched it from him

he brings you with him to towns and cities and he likes taking u to the markets to get you stuff

ushijima tell me your love language is gift-giving without telling me your love language is gift-giving-

he finds out you’re pretty good at bargaining and brings you onshore a lot more

is mesmerized at how you absolutely BERATE the merchant who was tryna rip you off like sis where is this violence coming from??? he loves it??

he also likes to stop by some pretty islands and imagines just settling down in such a nice place w you <333 SIGHS <333 VERY <333 LOUDLY <333

no matter how much he likes you...he will NOT let you drive the boat under any circumstances </3 its his livelihood c’mon man

whenever you have to stay on the ship while he’s away he sends rigatoni to give messages and the two of u talk thru messages

speaking of which rigatoni is fierce and can definitely sink his talons and his sharp beak into any bastard that dares get near you while the captain is away

wakatoshi “swimming is for pussies” ushijima - he’s water resistant

bruh so powerful he walks on water

second coming of christ who

IM JUST KIDDING he does swim but we hardly ever see it

legends say (tendou says) he looks rlly awkward doing it and only knows how to doggie paddle

speaking of our homeboy tendou - he loooves spooking the team (and especially you) with scary stories . don’t worry tho - this is all a ploy to get the beeg pirate husband to comfort u at night ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) he is ur wingman u can count on him. but his suggestions are ridiculous

“Jump off the deck and see if he’ll catch you!” um excuse me- THOU SHALT NOT PUT BIG HUSBAND TO THE TEST

he’s got good intentions...i think…

but everyone literally knows he would dive after you

in other words pirate!ushijima is a softie at heart but goddamn he probably secretly has a pet shark so dont test him or u goin overboard

mafia leader!kita

we are: associate from different group/family

kita highly respects u and yall have been acquainted since u were young with the alliance of ur families

so in a way ur childhood friends but yall do have lil bit of friendly rivalry a bit

arranged marriage whuuuutttt...yeah thats what happened but u love him <3

nobody else knows about ur arranged marriage but you two

POLITE GENTLEMAN <333 !!! HNNNNNNNN his granny raised him right even tho he’s a mafia leader

RICH BOY RICH BOY RICH BOY- ALWAYS DRESSES DASHINGLY AND SMELLS GREAT MMMMMM

he owns the majority of the underground casinos

and has lots of connections with others. countless, might i add.

you on the other hand specialize as an arms dealer so he cherishes your services the most

prob has the traditional tattoos allllll over his back and shoulders w like a dragon or sm and def a fox or kitsune

when u two were little he asked ur favorite flower and GOT THAT TATTOOED ON HIS BACK <3 probably secretly has your initials hidden in there somewhere

u both have a silent understanding of each other and he talks to u more than he does anyone

before he used to smoke but once he figured out that you didn’t like the smell of cigarettes he quit just like that

his underlings, the miya twins are so confused on how kita switches from totally brutal and ruthless to so soft around u

they can’t tease him for it, though, cuz he’d pulverize them

but they want to know more about u,,,you mysterious enigma,,,but kita would kill them if they dared asked about you

so they go to inarizaki’s most secretive informant/cyber mercenary, suna rintarou

and suna knows all about you. he saw you one time and he was curious about who you were and is now rlly scared of you because he dug too deep and you’ve got LOTS of history

he doesn’t dare tell the twins what he found no matter how much they bug him

until they bribe him at just the right price

and when aran finds out and tells kita?? ohhh boy it’s lights out for all three of them

oh my god ,,, would kill for u he loves u so much

one time you were kidnapped and held hostage

bro saw red

MAFIA ANNIHILATION SPEEDRUN ANY % NO GLITCH

he got world record time

wiped out the entire conglomerate behind it - nothing and nobody left behind after that

and of course, made sure you were safe.

yandere? ofc not...i mean...just look at him...so innocent...he would never...sharpening that knife...with splattered blood all over him...

is now joined at the hip with u,,,no matter how much you tell him you’ll be fine now and that you have tons of reliable bodyguards he won’t let it go

“don’t you have to go back to your place?” “this is my duty as both a fellow associate and your future husband.” aww,,,ur so sweet...but BRUH PLEASE GO HOME ARAN IS DOING EVERYTHING OVER THERE

makes sure to build a headquarters DIRECTLY NEXT TO YOURS so that its faster

and it’s not long until he just signs a deal to merge ur factions together (since yall getting married anyways)

and oh my god...ur underground wedding is SO SO PRETTY

absolutely DOESN’T care if he’s smuggling jewels from different countries - he’s having your ring CUSTOM MADE and the way you want it. “the diamond is too small? sure thing, darling, i’ll have it 7 times that size.”

makes sure everything is perfect in ur wedding <333 its very extravagant and even though its not really his style he’ll do anything for you

he absolutely WOULD take your last name if you wanted. FIGHT ME ON THIS

takes you to his private island for ur honeymoon so that the two of you don’t have to worry about work

meanwhile aran is scrambling around the place trying to cover for the both of you

he’s a VERY romantic husband - NEVER takes off his ring even for security. he says its practically a part of him just like you are <3

the ring has a built in tracker connected to an app. possessive? noooo...

in other words this escalated pretty quickly but i aint complaining if it gets me married to kita

--

--EXTRA EXTRA!! other characters’ roles!!--

officer!daichi:

karasuno squadron consists of:

cops: daichi (duh), asahi (mostly patrol, he hates confrontation), tanaka & noya (mostly accompanied by ennoshita), hinata & kageyama

investigators/detectives: sugawara, ennoshita, yamaguchi, tsukishima, kiyoko, yachi

surveillance: narita, kinoshita, tsukishima too

househusband!oikawa:

makki and mattsun are also househusbands

iwaizumi is a malewife fhasodjkasdhf-

ceo!kuroo:

lev is the newbie that walked in on u two-

janet still a bitch

kenma is his fellow ceo buddy. he also owns a multimillion dollar company and kuroo’s and his have a sort-of contract so you see him a lot in meetings

yaku is like one of the top performing managers so whenever yall have branch meetings he’s there

dog hybrid!bokuto:

kuroo is the black neighborhood cat bokuto almost murdered cough cough i did that on purpose yes i did

kenma is also another neighborhood cat. you don’t see him around that often but now that bokuto got jealous he stays far away.

hinata is the orange chihuahua i briefly mentioned

i couldn’t decide whether akaashi would stay human and be his previous owner or also be a cat/dog/owl. so lets say he’s ur human friend that is your bestie and comes over a lot. bokuto likes him, though. still gets jealous a bit.

pirate!ushijima:

tendou is practically is right hand man

the rest of the team have something to give idk how to explain pirate team members okay-

BUT BUT BUT- they do have sea rivals which are the seijoh pirates. you ran into them one day and oikawa thought you were kidnapped (you were, but you liked it there) so he tried to do you justice and failed miserably. ushijima ragdolled him into the ocean when he flirted w you.

mafia!kita:

the twins are something akin to mercenaries basically. or just plain lackeys.

suna is an informant/cyber mercenary. he gathers information about ppl which is how he knew about you. and he’s a hacker lol.

aran is his second-in-command, omimi + ginjima are his bodyguards

a/n: im going to regret posting this

[alwaysahiccupandastrid]

How Bad is Sia’s “Music” really?

I watched it illegally (because there was no way I was paying for that bullshit) and found out. It’s not as bad as we thought... It’s worse.

TW for ableism, Sia, drugs, alcohol, just in general a terrible movie, meltdowns, blackface

Literally the first thing you hear while they’re showing the production companies is THOSE stereotypical noises. If you’ve seen the trailer, you’ll know what I mean.

And yes, she does this for the WHOLE fucking movie

What was the need to show her in her underwear? Maddie Ziegler was 14 when this was made, so what was the need??? And why did Sia prolong the scene by having her hitting herself?

Less than a minute in and my reaction was already “what the fuck is this shit?”

So the opening number not only had stereotypical exaggerated facial expression, it has Maddie in BLACKFACE?!? And with culturally appropriated hair?!?

The exaggerated facial expressions are literally constant and I took photos during the film to show it, more later, but I’ll keep mentioning it

ITS LITERALLY THE WHOLE FUCKING TIME SHE IS ON SCREEN

Even her way of walking is fucking offensive, Jesus Christ

The vocalisations just had me cringing so hard, I cannot describe how awful it made me feel

Why do all the neighbours need to be paid off and help her when she goes for a walk? I don’t-

Yes, by about the five minute mark I was already seriously debating all my life decisions. It was that bad.

Kate Hudson really didn’t give a fuck that her grandma died

I will keep saying it but WHY are the facial expressions/vocalisations CONSTANT?!! Literally they do not stop at all. I work with a child who is actually similar to this in that he’s nonverbal and he makes similar noises/faces, but the way they’re in this movie is so over-exaggerated?!? And even the kid I work with doesn’t do it 24/7?!?

Sia, calling your characters Zu and Music doesn’t make them interesting in the slightest. They’re still painfully terrible and one dimensional

Literally ONE minute after being left alone with her autistic sister, Zu calls the mental health service asking if they could “theoretically” “pick up” her sister?!? Like she wants to get rid of her already?!?

“A magical little girl” - autism isn’t a magical power?!? And Music is a young woman, not a little girl?!? Why are you infantilising her?!?

Okay I’m not being funny but this choreography is NOT hard. ANYONE can do it, so claiming that you needed to hire a dancer to be Music because of the numbers is literally bullshit (and even so, there are so many amazing autistic actors and dancers?!?)

20 minutes in and I wanted to give up

So she had her first meltdown because her hair didn’t get braided immediately and that’s... certainly interesting??

The fact that Leslie Odom’s character says “I’m going to crush you now”?!?

AND THEN HE FUCKING PICKS HER UP AND FULL-BODILY PINS HER DOWN ONTO THE FLOOR

“I’m crushing her with my love” - oh fuck you, just fuck you

So Sia lied, the restraint scenes were NOT removed and there was no warning. She’s a fucking POS liar

I have no idea why he’s called Ebo or why he has such a cliche African accent?!? I might have missed out on why because I was busy trying not to bang my head into the table while I watched this film but just... yikes

“He (his brother) liked to be held” - YEAH, HELD. NOT FUCKING CRUSHED

“He is dead now” - IM NOT FUCKING SURPRISED IF YOU CRUSHED HIM LIKE THAT

The constant babying and patronizing of the autistic character is so exhausting to watch. I’m so tired

“Planning on sending her to the people pound but I guess I’ll keep her a little longer” - SHE WAS JOKING BUT THAT WAS NOT EVEN REMOTELY A FUNNY JOKE. NOT EVEN IN AN AWKWARD WAY

STOP THE FACES IM-

^ YEAH, Sia, totally a fucking love letter to the autistic community here ^

So Zu finds this necklace she made as a kid that had a little dog on it, and she says to Music, “He had seizures too, just like you”... MELTDOWNS AND SEIZURES ARE NOT EVEN REMOTELY THE SAME FUCK THIS MOVIE-

It’s like Sia is trying to make the movie funny but it’s really not at all

Is Zu implying that Music is autistic because the mum was a junkie?!?

For real though, the dialogue in general is so fucking awful and cringey. Whoever wrote this should never be allowed to write again

Did she seriously leave her autistic sister alone to talk to who I’m presuming was her dealer or loan shark?!?

Also why is he - a white dude - wearing cornrows?!?

So who is the film really about? The autistic girl or the older sister saviour? I think we all know the answer to that one

WHY IS SHE WALKING AROUND WITH HER TEETH JUTTING OUT LIKE THAT ALL THE TIME

The musical numbers are literally so painful to watch. The overly bright colours, the flashing... my eyes were hurting and so was my brain

Autism representation aside for a second, the musical numbers/choreography are all fucking atrocious. Ditto for the costumes

LIKE WHAT THE FUCK WERE THE PINK OOMPA LOOMPA FRUIT THINGS?!? THEY LOOK LIKE THE PINK VERSIONS OF VIOLET BEAUREGARDE THE BLUEBERRY

I wanted to cry by this point, this movie is far more awful than I thought

“I’m not saying she doesn’t want to change, I’m saying she can’t” - FUCK YOU. Why is it okay for him to assume what she can or can’t do

Can I just say that autistic people aren’t constantly in a coked up wonderland state?!! We don’t see the world as a wonderland fantasy world 24/7?!!

“She can hear you from two rooms away” / *shows her listening through two brick walls to a conversation* — Also, we don’t have super fucking sonic hearing?? WE CANT HEAR THROUGH FUCKING BRICK WALLS?!?

“She can understand everything you’re saying to her” - she’s autistic not fucking deaf

Less than 45 minutes in, there’s another meltdown in the park

“I’m not climbing on top of a small screaming white girl in public” - yeah please fucking don’t

So Zu fucking pins her down with her weight 🤦‍♀️

“She doesn’t know who she’s hitting” - IM SORRY WHAT

EBO LITERALLY SAID “TREAT HER LIKE A BEAR” when talking her through the prone restraint, I fucking CANNOT

“Tell her she’s safe” - NOT IF YOU FUCKING RESTRAIN HER LIKE THAT SHE IS NOT

The fact that she gets up, smiling and happy after a meltdown and immediately is excited to get a snow cone... I can honestly say that after a meltdown, I am in no way happy or smiling. I am often not very verbal and I’m withdrawn/not myself for at least several hours, usually the rest of the day. Fuck this film

This film is literally just about Zu, and Music is there for a plot device to give her character development. That’s all she’s there for.

Love how Sia shoehorned Zu being suicidal in there. You know, just to try and make her more easy to sympathize with (it doesn’t work)

This film is literally just a 1 hour 47 minute Sia music video with ZERO plot

WHY WERE THEY WEARING PILLOW DIAPERS IN ONE NUMBER-

I really did not feel into the side plot with that guy who was fighting but it was still better than the actual movie so...

I am SO DONE with the NON STOP CONSTANT vocal shit. So tired.

LOJ’s only role in this film is to be the stereotypical wise black guy who assists a white woman’s story. There’s like hardly any other depth there

The Ebo/Zu romance is so fucking stupid and pointless and out of NOWHERE. I couldn’t even tell if they were into each other or not

I was already so bored of the musical numbers by this point. They added NOTHING to the plot but they pretended they did, and I was so over it. And it’s not because I’m not “creative enough” or anything to understand, I love musicals and I think it could have been cool if done right... but it wasn’t. They were a mess. It’s just bad.

Sia really tried to pretend her movie was deep but really it’s a shallow mess

So Zu is meeting rich drug clients and says to Music “try not to have one of your freak outs up there” and “if you could try to get it out now”... FUCKING YIKES. It’s not an on/off button, shut the fuck up

YEP THIS WAS THE SIA CAMEO FUCK THAT BITCH

The fact that she just calls “DRUG DEALER?!? DRUG DEALER IS THAT YOU”, fucking end this please-

I fucking hate this bitch I’m dead serious

“We’re gonna send them to Haiti cause there’s been an earthquake. All these buildings fell down, children’s bones were dislocated” - WHY WAS SHE SO CHEERFUL ABOUT IT

“Gonna buy a shit load of pain meds, gonna but them on my private plane” - FUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOU

“Pop stars without borders” - Sia thinks she’s so clever but I would give anything to punch her I swear-

ANOTHER MUSICAL NUMBER JUST STOP IM BEGGING YOU

There’s this awkward conversation/bit with Zu and her drug dealer/loanshark about his outfit that was clearly meant to be funny but was just flat and painful

Yep, Sia really showed Music eating chewing gum off the underside of a park bench. Of course.

Look, the kid I work with does similar stuff by putting literally anything and everything in his mouth but like... why would you put that in your movie?

And there’s no indication before this that Music puts everything and anything in her mouth, she just randomly decides to get on her knees, under the bench and eat chewing gum, like she calculates that it’s there and gets it???

She has a THIRD meltdown after an allergic reaction to a bee sting and her sister just yells at her before realizing... I’m not here for this movie, I feel like I drifted off and was not really there

So Zu got angry because she left the drugs at the park but she’s not that upset that her sister had an allergic reaction???

Zu gets absolutely drunk because a) she lost Sia’s drugs and b) she’s stressed out by her autistic sister... wow, great message, Sia!

She really fucked off and left her sister alone to go clubbing/on a bender

The less said about the musical number here the better

Sia’s movie also checks the box of having stereotypical Asian parents, specifically stereotypical Asian dad being harsh/angry and hitting his wife!

ALSO HE PUSHED AND KILLED HIS SON WTF IS HAPPENING

Less than 3 minutes after the last, there’s a musical number that I think was about this side character going to heaven... another shitty Sia-esque number

The patterns during the number made my brain hurt.

Also there are so many autistic actors who can also dance, and yet Sia chose the neurotypical one because ✨ N E P O T I S M ✨

I just want to know how it was deemed necessary to show the fact the autistic character peed/wet herself? I mean... ??? It’s just so undignified and not at all necessary to the plot. Nothing happens after that, it just moves onto the next scene and it didn’t do anything

“I have no one” - 1) YOUR FUCKING SISTER. 2) GEE I FUCKING WONDER WHY, couldn’t be that you’re a shitty human being?!?

There’s a scene where Music is walking and she does ALL the stereotypical behaviours at once... just YIKES

Zu somehow stopped another meltdown just by grabbing Music by the shoulders and sitting her down???

Aaand yep. Another shitty musical number

Zu really goes to put her sister in a fucking facility and claims it’ll be “better for her” - BULLSHIT. Better for Zu, maybe, not Music.

Ah yes - the girl who the characters have said has problems with routines being changed/change in general... you’re now going to fuck up her routine by dumping her in a facility. Perfect Plan.

The nonverbal autistic girl suddenly speaking to say “don’t go” - you can just predict it from the off, can’t you?

Love that as soon as Music starts talking, Zu is like “fuck it, I’ll keep her!”

Zu really went and crashed Ebo’s brothers wedding... in a fucking bralette... YIKES

“I almost gave Music away” - SHE IS NOT A DOG YOU DONT GIVE PEOPLE AWAY

“We should sing a song” - PLEASE DO FUCKING NOT

Also that kiss/romance montage between Zu and Ebo was the CRINGIEST fucking shit ever

This movie seems to be implying that Music has locked in syndrome or something, like she’s locked in her own head or whatever it’s called, and I just... *sigh*

Oh and now Music magically fucking sings in a room FULL of strangers... this is literally embarrassing, please let this end

I mean it, this movie was fucking painful to watch on ever level

She got a service dog puppy which... okay?

Oh look, it’s the only decent song on the soundtrack but with an absolutely shitty over-stimulatory music video with the credits!

I can only name 5 characters in this film. Maybe 7 at a push, but even then I would be guessing

AND YEP SHE THANKED AUTISM SPEAKS OVER THE CREDITS. FUCK YOU SIA 🖕🏻

Let me reiterate: this is a movie about a neurotypical former drug addict whose character development comes from the autistic character, from having an autistic sister she has to take care of. I’m so tired.

We are NOT plot devices or tools for character development. Not once does anyone in this film treat Music like a human being - she’s treated as a burden, a problem, and then like a pet that they decide to keep. Not once is the film focused on how she is feeling - it’s always about Zu or Ebo. The performance itself was so over exaggerated and it made me want to cry when I watched it because this is how the world sees us, and this movie will make it ten times worse. It’s stuff like this that made me think “I don’t want to be labelled as autistic because people will think I’m a certain way”, that made me wait so long before going to the GP to get a referral.

As I said, poor autistic representation aside, the movie is just so appallingly bad. It truly is one of the worst films I’ve watched. If you’re going to watch it, please don’t - or, if you want to because you want to see how bad it is/to raise awareness/critical posts, at least do it illegally. Do not give Sia your money.

[rhaaclaws]

HI rhaast ^_^ throws these numbers at you 9, 25, 30, AND 56 :]

9. Fave fight?

KC AND METALLICA MY BEST FRIENDDDDDD listen its gross but thats one of the things I love about it. like the bullshittery and the thought process from each fighter AND MY FRIEND KCCC WOOOOO its so good I rewatch it so fucking often [and then cry at ep28 to humble myself] Another one of my fav fights is Bites The Dusts and Made In Heaven because these two terrify me sooo much like THE HORRORS. BTD with how I was constantly worried shaking and crying over who was gonna die [and listen. you didn't hear it from me but when I thought rohan was gonna die I was CRYINGGGGG like tears down my face it was kind of gross] and MIH is just auauhghghghgh the HORRRORSSSSSSSS like what the fuck.... it did everything it had to do RIGHT but it hurt so fucking much and that damn ending. makes me want to explode anyways teehe "you daughter is your weakness" Dies

25. Stand ability you think wasn’t used well enough in the series?

Sorry for focusing so much on diu and va I'm just silly BUT. Love Deluxe, Purpy haze and Spice girl. first off ik this is more of just the character instead of stand but shhhhh Yukako could've bodied fucking everyone in that damn cast she'd get kira in one hit as she should! PURPY HAZEEE this is obvious but Please pelsepolease I need to see him again I'm so devastated WITH THAT COOL ASS THEME TOO..... BRUH... anwyays Spice Girl my best friend he could've also done it all but noooo. Whatevers.

30. Rank your order: Jojo main villains

ok im exceptionally bad at ranking things BUT I have two lists, villains I Like and how much they scare me. In terms of who I like

Diavolo [toxic slutch privileges]

Dio [sorry hes just such a bad bitch]

Kars [she's my best friend, not really a villain but deserves to be on here]

Pucci [Many thoughts but I trust my friends like Quintus to do him justice, pucci is funny though but please go to therapy instead of projecting]

The bitch who shall not be named

I JUSTS RELAIZESXD IO FORGOT KIRA. I PROMISE ITS NOT ON PURPOSE I WAS JUST LIKE HMMM WHO AM I MISSING FROM HERE BUT PKFSDFKJHGSDFLKGJSFGJKHSFG IM SORRY I DONT SEE HIM AS A CHARCATER HES LIKE. AN ENTITY BUT NOT IN A FUNNY KARS WAY HE ONLY SCARES ME I DONT CARE ABT HIS CHARACTER anyways these r the ones that scare me [With Kira]

Kira [i think hes the best jojo villain in terms of playing his role and bringing that awful unsettling feeling that shit is WRONG]

I'm gonna be honest everyone else is under here in near the same level because I'm only really scared by kira. pucci isn't scary for me bc i was raised around Catholics, whats he gonna do? preach to me? kars is my friend and everyone else id have no way of meeting bc I'm in Mexico yall stay safe though 🙏

56. Any headcanons?

LITERALLY SOOOOOO MANYYYYYYY im only gonna mention some that im obsessed with rn bc its so much dude I have a google docs just for the main p5 cast and its like. 4 pages long

anywaysssss

Akira and Yukako are siblings its true to me it happened and its real like they're SOOO SIBLINGS. they are going to the powerlines and throwing bricks at it and causing electrical damages I could talk about them for hours

I RLLY LIKE THE ONE where the reason Jolyne can turn her midriff into a Mobius strip for the strings is that Jotaro was so traumatized from seeing Kakyoin having a hole in his stomach he passed that trauma onto her and it was a form of protection so she'd never have to go through that again. there's this one post from a couple years ago that says this beautifully but i don't think i can find it

anyways. funny one next: Tiziano almost exclusively uses toxic paints because "theyre the best quality" best friend that's mercury you're snorting

Fugo cut those holes as a way to 'stay clean' from self harm and as a reminder that he's not touched. victim to victim communication

ALSO i rlly like that idea that stands will manifest if the user is experiencing strong emotions [ex Giorno gets super excited and starts growing flowers around]

another stand based one is that when you get your stand they change something physical abt you [like Yukako's hair got wayyy long and thicker bc of Love Deluxe, Diavolo's eyes turned into that shattered green bc of King Crimson, shit like that]

Abbacchio had one hell of a gender adventure. the 'well I'm fascinated by femininity but I'm not a girl' to 'well i like being called a girl but by strangers by presumption' to 'Wait.'

I was talking abt this to Raph earlier but Reimi likes to scare ppl in the alley like that scene in Beetlejuice with the fucked up faces

She tried it on Yukako and she was like. Holy shit can you do that again?

This is bc Yukako is a horror fan through and through. her gay awakening and first movie crush was the girl from the ring SOBS

Also I see Yukako as a lesbian because her arc literally reminds me so much of comphet and the fucking lengths I've gone to be like 'wellll i Have to like men'

This is stolen from a rlly good fic but Akira was struck by lightning as a kid

Fugo is a fucking HATER. this is just canon but whatevs

I think its be fun for Mista to experiment with the Genderisms through drag

Trish and her punk album can be something so personal

Ok tahts rlly long but im always willing to give hcs on fucking. Anything bc my brain is so fat and juicy with intelligence 24/7 its so hard ANYWAYS THIS WAS FUN

[showf4lls]

hi hi hi! This is my first ever matchup and I'm so sure it will raise the standards i have even more but i don't care. I would love a romantic matchup, c! or cc! doesn't matter, whatever fits. I dont have a preference but i dont have that much of a connection with like the dteam, im more of a l´manburg kinda girl

my name is dana (she/her) and im openly bisexual :D. When i did the 16 personalities test it said im an "infp-t" and it fits nearly 100%. When im with my friends im more of an extrovert tho. I am very loyal to my friends, especially those in my closest friend group and i would do anything for them. In school i was the funny one, the people in my grade voted me as one who provokes teachers with jokes and always has something to say and i took that number one place with pride. As you will see, i also fall in love very easily and i fall hard. Even if its someone i saw once

my hobbies are reading even tho i wish i would do it more (but i will be a librarian :D), cooking with my friends or watching tv series with them which is also my love language. I like inviting my best friend over for breakfast or cook for my friend group on special occasions.

My favorite movie is "howls moving castle" and im so in love with howl three fav songs: "sex sells" by lovejoy, "metamodernity" by vansire and "afterglow" by sunrise avenue (a Finnish band that got huge in Germany and i fell in love with the lead singer when he was on the voice of Germany lmao) im trying to go for a nature aesthetic with a lot of plants, earth tone clothing but i do love dark academia in movies and books a lot.

me in a nutshell is basically: i cry a lot, i fall in love easily and falling out of love or getting my heartbroken affects me for a long time, i love reading, listening to music 24/7, can be outgoing if its with my friends and we go to bars or clubs but i do love calm evenings spent together eating, chatting, drinking and playing some board games.

― vibe check! i match you with... nihachu !

cw + info! fluff, headcanons / no CWs

includes! cc!nihachu

note! okay look /lh. i was gonna match you with jack or tina, but i feel like you fit better with niki.  also, for anyone interested, feel free to check out the event here!

– fiercely loyal to you. would put her life on the line rather than cross you, especially since she knows you would do the same for her

– she really likes listening to you tell jokes and just generally be a goofball; she likes getting a good laugh out of your antics and watching how happy you get realizing that you made her laugh, though she does get on your case for provoking teachers and such

– you fall in love easily? good thing that she does, too. she might not be very obvious about it and take longer to trust those that she catches feelings for, but once you’re in, you’re in

– loves reading with you! the two of you will start an unofficial book club and both read the same book, then you’ll set aside time to sit together and talk about the book

– when it’s raining outside, you’ll turn on the fireplace and sit on the couch, both snuggled up under a blanket while you read together and just be cozy (also, tea or hot cocoa is a must for these situations)

– if one of you is really tired and having trouble winding down before you go to sleep, the other will read to them. niki’s extra soft with you in these moments: gets herself all comfy and half-laying down, pillows behind her back, before letting you rest your head in her lap or on her tummy. she’ll play with your hair, twirling it or combing her fingers through it, while she reads to you

– loves cooking and baking with you as well! she’s definitely better at baking though, so she leaves the cooking to you. really likes to sit on the counter and watch you for a while, talking to you or asking questions as you work. as she keeps watching and learning little tidbits here and there, she’ll eventually ask you to teach her your ways :>

– she especially likes when you bring a speaker into the kitchen and play your music while you’re cooking, just saying

– studio ghibli movie nights! both of you love the animation style so much and the plots are always so cute! you prefer to watch them together so that you’ll have each other when you cry 

– you guys schedule game nights together! you’ll sit down with some good drinks and a fun board game (you guys have collected enough to justify getting a game cabinet) and just spend hours playing games together! you only have one rule with the board games: no monopoly unless a guest suggests it, otherwise the both of you will be sitting there for eons trying to finish the game