#I love digital art but every now and then I just need to physically feel the scratch of a pencil on paper to draw something decent

[sunnibits]

art block may be kicking my ass into the heavens lately but at least I know I can still doodle a good izzy profile at work

[validfemale]

` a girly guide to journaling .𖥔 ݁ ˖

keeping a diary is honestly the ultimate girl power move—it’s not just fun, it’s like therapy but cuter and all yours. keeping those pages full is how i keep my mental game strong and my girliness on point.

i’ve been doing this consistently for years now, so trust me, i know all the hacks. here’s the tea on all my fave diary tools, inspo, and tips to keep your diary flourishing like it deserves.

✦ — WHY KEEPING A DIARY IS EVERYTHING?

having a diary is like creating your own little world where all your thoughts, dreams, and random brain dumps live. every time you flip back, it’s like chatting with an old friend (who just happens to be you).

nothing beats that feeling of re-reading your own wild thoughts, laughing at old jokes, or realizing how much you’ve leveled up since then. plus, a diary is a no-judgment zone. it’s therapy with glitter pens—just you, your thoughts, and all the space you need to rant, rave, or reflect without anyone intruding. think of it as your self-love sanctuary.

✦ — MUST-HAVE GOODIES FOR YOUR PHYSICAL DIARY!

♡ color-pop pens: pastels, metallics, and scented inks make writing more fun. pick pens that scream you.

♡ cute stickers & washi tape: because every page deserves a mini makeover. get stickers that match your vibe—flowers, stars, or maybe a lil’ sparkle.

♡ scrap-worthy bits: magazine clippings, instant photos, pressed flowers—whatever you want to glue down to capture a moment. treat your diary like an art journal, too.

✦ — STUFF TO STICK IN FOR EXTRA PERSONALITY!

♡ decorative inserts: think vintage paper, glitter accents, and ribbons to add layers. let your pages be as fancy or minimal as you like.

♡ pretty diaries: invest in a diary that feels good to hold. go for soft covers, plushy textures, or fun patterns that make you want to pick it up and write.

✦ — DIGITAL DIARY ESSENTIALS!

♡ digital notebooks (like Notion): for an organized, clean look. play with templates to match your aesthetic.

♡ header graphics + mood photos: make each section extra with dreamy visuals. pinterest is the ultimate treasure trove for this.

digital diaries are perfect for on-the-go thoughts. you can switch things up, add GIFs, or create cute collages with zero mess.

✦ — WHEN IT COMES TO WRITING!

diaries are a vibe, so make your entries match your mood. some days, you’ll have full-on storytime entries; other days, it’s all about the little things. start with “hey love” if you’re feeling sweet, or just dive right in. treat it like your cozy space for everything you wish someone would ask about.

i like to write twice a week to keep it consistent (but no pressure). some entries are just life recaps; others are random lists or things that make me smile.

[londonfoginacup]

Personal stream of consciousness around Liam and grief and moving forward

Every day I wake up and Liam is still dead. It continues to sort of feel like at some point I will wake up and that won’t be true, that he’ll be back, like he’s just on a trip right now. And I think that’s… a normal part of the grieving process, but it’s hard because it feels disrespectful, almost.

I only did 8 days of inktober this year. I had another ten sketched out already in my notebook, and now I wonder what to do with those. Some of them were good! (Some weren’t). I was older than Liam by a month or so, but for some reason I want to be able to go to him now, and show him those sketches, and say, I do art too! Aren’t you proud of me?

Death is a horrible and unnatural thing. It was never supposed to happen to us. We grieve because we were not made to lose people. We were made to love them forever. Grief is our body trying desperately to reconcile with a reality it was never made for. That is why it feels this way. We were not made for a life like this. We were made to hold one another in our arms. We were made to love each other. We were made for more.

I want to tell him that. That he was made for more than he got. I hope someday I can.

When tumblr started having polls, I always voted the Liam option, and in part that was because I love Liam and I would’ve chosen him regardless. But in part it was with the thought that, if he were to ever snoop on our community here, I wanted Liam to see that he had people in his corner. I don’t regret that. I’m sad it’s all I could do.

I was thinking about it earlier. About One Direction. I tried to slice it so many ways and I came to the conclusion that Liam and Louis are the ones that I think were the heart. I think 1D could’ve come back together to tour, make music, and so on, as long as it had at least those two. 1D could never exist without Liam. It just couldn’t. He loved them too much.

Obviously, I haven’t turned my queue back on. I haven’t felt right reblogging current day stuff about the boys. It feels like turning that back on will indicate being ready to move on, to some extent. And okay, I’ll never be ready so there’s that. But. The idea of turning it back on doesn’t feel right. Not yet.

That being said, I started last month preparing for Christmas. For the 25 days of fic rec I do, and the advent fic. And of course cards. I had decided just a week before Everything Happened that I couldn’t afford to do physical cards this year. And I feel ten times more guilty about that decision now, because it feels like surely people NEED that! But I am also trying to be realistic with myself; so many wonderful people have offered to help financially, and any other time I think I would’ve taken them up on that, but right now the emotional and mental weight of doing physical cards might also be too heavy.

Which, again, makes me feel like I’m letting people down when they need me. If I could, I would send all of you personalized letters every day. It is so hard to reckon with the knowledge that I am only human and must take care of myself.

But I will do the fic recs. that’s easy; I’ve already finished the post graphics.

And I will do the advent fic (I might change my plot— the original one didn’t have a lot of Liam, but i think I need him there more).

And I will make some sort of digital cards for sure. It occurred to me this year that I never put my paper dolls online anywhere and I sort of wonder why not. At least maybe this will be a treat for anyone too wary of sending a stranger online their address— all of you can print th paper dolls for yourselves. I’ll make plenty of outfits.

So. That’s my plan, I suppose. I’ve cried writing this more than I’ve cried all week, I think because it’s easy to think that I am past the worst of the grieving right up until I have to look head on at the facts again.

I miss him. I miss him. How could this happen.

[simp-ly-writes]

Suits, Ties, and Thus Spies (pt.3)

Pairing: Spy!Task Force 141 x Handler!Reader

Summary: Its the task force's first mission as Agents at Taylor Tailor's. How will it go- will other agents accept them and most of all- will you be able to handle working with so many agents on the same mission?

Warnings:2500 words, light swearing and teasing, depictions of blood and violence. A/N: sorry for the delay... decided to change the look of these stories too (hope you like the change!). Masterlist | Taglist | edited.

6:00 PM | Autumn | National Museum of Art and History

Agent Whitby grips the back of another man's suit into a fist, slamming his face repeatedly into the brick wall of the storage room. Blood pours out from their nose, a harsh gash forming against their left cheek and forehead- the skin purple and blue as one of their eyes swells shut. “You really are wasting my time here- you’re a waste of time really for anyone so why not just tell me what the code is, make it easy on your looks and my patience- hm?” he challenges, flicking his head back as the man tries to elbow him in the face. 

Letting out a tisk, Whitby drops the man, holding him in place with a dress shoe to the chest as he feels the man begin to cough up blood as he cringes, eyeing at the lower fabric of his suit becoming damaged by the liquid. Letting out a sigh, while shaking his head, glass slipping down his face as he reaches into his waistband leveling the barrel of the gun in between their eyes. 

“Let us try this again, where-” Whitby pauses at the sound of your voice coming through his earpiece, tilting his head to the side as he continues to stare down at the man, waiting for him to speak the answers he evers-so needs. 

“Whitby, do you have a moment?” you ask coated in sweety-coated sarcasm as you watch him through a hidden camera put on his glasses- observing the man on the floor with mocking pity on your features as you turned to Laswell and point to the room Whitby closed himself into as various enemies flooded the floors below him, making their way upstairs and into the ancient egyptian part of the museum. 

“All my time is yours, love. Only to ask,” Whitby says lovingly while stepping into the man's chest harder, hearing as he wheezes out from the pressure. “Warming my heart here darling,” you start to say, hands moving across the keyboard as you add the scanned models of your newest agents into the digital model. “Whitby, I am sending my newest agents in to help you as a gage for the training that needs to be done. You are in charge, congrats- you are a new father of four!” 

“You’re joking-” Whity begins to say before Handler Jacobs patches themselves into the call, a still image of them setting on your computer screen as soundwaves spike and drop in rhythm to his speech. “Agent, this is Handler Jacobs, you are green to finish him off- passcode is.” You wince as the gunshot rings in your ears- stilling the blood in your body as switch yours and Laswell’s calls over to the boys comms as they arrive at the scene. Their once greyed out figures now bursting with colour and moving in sync to their current actions. 

“Alright Agents, give me a sign that you hear me,” you test, watching the surveillance coverage with a nervous smile as you begin to pick at your nail polish, blood pumping and making it way upwards to your head- settling its thundering beat in your ears. Laswell scoots her office chair closer, placing a hand on your shoulder for reassurance as you let out a large breath. “Loud and clear” rings through your comms as you shake Laswells hand off of you, moving to stand and lean over the diagram. “A physical sign please-” you stress as silence is all you receive on the line, watching as they start to whisper to one another and look around, feeling around their suits. 

“I don’t think I copy, Dee…” Gaz says, rubbing the back of his head. “I watch your every move boys while on a mission. And that is Handler D, please. Turn left and go through the staff entrance, inside the envelope is a swipe to get through the door. Charlotte has already put your biometrics into the security. You will have to climb up the disabled  elevator shaft. Agent Whitby is on the third floor in the Egyptian exhibit awaiting your arrival as we speak.”

“Oh,” Soap responded, waving his hands widely in the hair as you shake your head- looking at Laswell who is struggling to contain her laughter as you grip at the table, knuckles turning white. You watch as the task force makes their way, peering down each corner and into the elevator shaft as they begin to climb the ropes. You watch their technique, writing a few notes on a nearby paper-pad from your desk upon their technique. “We are on the third floor,” John states. 

“Walk as I talk please, turn left, left again, open the yellow door to your right there is a card swipe behind the suit of armour. In 10 steps you find a closet door, open it,” you order, falling back into your chair as their digital models work through the space, guns raised as you click your pen on and off, listening as your clicks sound in tune to the digital clock on your screen. You continue your notes as a ping vibrates through your phone. Mouthing a thank you to Laswell, the report you asked for finally in your inbox. 

“Well hello there,” Whitby states, picking up the dead man's handkerchief as he cleans his hands before shaking each of the task force’s in a strong grip and tight smile. “Agent Whitby, do follow me,” he commands, dropping the piece of cloth to the floor before ushering the group outside the closet as he starts to jog down the hall and places the code into the staff hallway before continuing to navigate the maze of white tiled floors and beige walls without a blink of worry. Handler Jacobs rattles off directions in his earpiece as the task force remains impressed by his supposed memorization of the building. 

“Alright boys, there is one hostile coming up on your west in 5, 4, 3 2, and…” you watch as Johnny tackles the forager into a nearby cart, various vitals of chemicals spill across the floor as they hiss and fizzle amongst one another, eating away at the leather of his shoes. Loosening his tie, Whitby restrains the woman, humming to himself while scanning the rest of the hallway. “Good work, agent,” Whitby compliments, clapping a hand down on their shoulder before continuing to move down the hall and sporadically turning on 90 degrees to slam the door back on another forger, they curse out in pain, dropping to their knees before quickly standing and rushing out into the hall, starting to swing at Whitby.

Dipping down and extending his leg outwards, the man falls over, face slamming into the tile floors below just before they grip his ankle, tackling the agent down with him. Various punches are shared before Whitby has their purple-head in between his thighs- they whimper for air, slamming their fists repeatedly against his thighs while. Whitby signals over for another tie as John wraps the fabric tightly around their wrists. Straightening his jacket one more, Whitby’s chest rapidly rises and falls- needing air he unbuttons a series from his dress shirt before punching in a code back into the door as it creaks in welcome. 

Flicking the lights on, Whitby now walks with a limp to his step- observing the various artifacts in the room sat beside the fakes that were to be sold. Pinching the edge of his glasses, he takes a series of photos- uploading them into the system. “Ghost and Soap, right? If you could demolish these fakes.”

“You have 12 combatants coming from the roof, 20 minutes until they reach you all,” you comment, eyes flicking from the model to the surveillance photo as you chew your lip anxiously. “I have already informed Kyle and Price in the hall but the police are on their way- 30 minutes tops you all. Destroy and set the forgers in place. We cannot be seen,” you state, setting a timer to each of their watches. 

“Then let the fun begin,” Whitby announces to the room before they all get to work smashing through the various fake vases and statues that were to be sold for profit through these criminals. Porcelain shards fly and rattle against one another, crunching beneath their shoes. Glass cabinets are flung open, mixing with the debris on the floor as Soap sets fire to a fake wooden ship carving. Flicking your vision back to the hall, John and Kyle made their way back into the room, tying the criminals to desk chairs and placing a bat at their feet with a smirk. Just as they shut the door behind themselves, you clicked a button on your console as the ties fell from their hands and the forgers scrambled and scratched against the door for an escape to only find none besides the prison cell that awaits them. 

“You are to take your cars back, Whitby is driving to get your gear cleaned before you step back into the facility- safety protocol. Good work today, boys- a few training notes I have for later but other than that, a successful mission is all that matters- management is pleased,” you note watching as they descended from the window, grappling with their belt and buckle before skirting off into the city streets.

A rock station began to bang through the car's audio system just before you shut off communications and watched them drive to the specialty cleaners. Taking a stand and clapping your hands, Laswell rubbed her eyes before announcing her departure. Taking a long hug together you showed her back to the store front before running across the street to pick up a bottle of liquor. Smiling at the black label brand you pay and dash back to the lobby - pouring out a series of cups with ice and phone for Charlotte, Jason, Jacobs, and Samantha to join you all for a debrief. 

–

You smile, watching as the boys do their best to flatten out their freshly primed suits and straighten their ties before walking up to you lounging in one of the many chairs in the large living space of the lobby. The leather creaks under each of their weight, each man smiling as you hand over a glass of Tennessee whisky just as Whitby sends you a knowing wink while eyeing up the bottle. 

“Interesting choice, sweetheart.” He teases as you roll your eyes, shoving his shoulder with your own playfully before he starts to lean closer to you, lips drifting featherlight words into your ear as your cheeks turn back. Charlotte smiles at the bottom of her glass, emitting an echoing chuckle before locking her ankles with Jacobs sat across from her. 

“Are you all dating? Or is this an agent-handler culture thing we don’t understand?” Johnny asks. Eyeing the way Whitby's hands drift across your clothing, finding hidden bits of your warm skin with a small frown as you furiously shake your head. “No, no, no, definitely not. But in this line of work specifically… you only want to get with people who really know you- for you. Not the management-mandated mask externally…” you drift off just as Whitby places a hand on your knee, smiling reassuringly before standing and distributing the rest of the bottle as you each cheer for a successful first mission. 

Returning back home, flicking on the bedroom lamp and getting ready for the night and the subsequent morning after. You could only close that night, snuggling into your cold empty sheets of your house- praying that your remaining “favour-missions” go just as smoothly as the last.

But as the cold night air wept its way through the curtains and into your harrowing dreams as you tossed and turned through the night, gripping and digging into your sheets as the streets became lively in the morning light. Your alarm sounded as you felt around to slam it down shut, another day, another mission done and with your bags packed in preparation. It would be a quick training session and the team's first international mission as a kidnapped royal needed your help. 

You groaned at the panic voice mail, the personal bodyguard shaking like a leaf before pleading through your home's digital system speakers. You start a voicemail while pouring a cup of coffee, the toaster pops up as you navigate through the kitchen and settle down at the island. 

“I have an agent close by to their last known location- they will be forwarded until I can get me and my team into a local base of operations. We will bring them home for the country,” you finish the note with, chugging down the rest of your drink before washing your plates in the sink. Feeling underneath the counter, your fingers dip into crevices- a light flashes red and the floor just beside your slides open. 

A fireproof box hisses open to your fingerprint, various foreign currencies and passports from your past missions flood your memories, fingers drifting over each material and number before settling them on the countertop. 

Stepping into your pantry you push back on a wall, the surface rumbles for a moment before turning itself and revealing a series of steps down towards your basement. The lights flicker on to your presence, humming slightly above your head as you make your way down the firing range and towards your collection. Gently picking up and cleaning each gun, you place them in their travel safe and locked containers before slamming the door behind you. 

Packing your belongings into a bulletproof suitcase- made from the same material as your suit. “X?” you request to your house, “Yes, Handler Daniels?” the AI responds in a pleasant accent back- awaiting your every order. “Please make a suit reservation in one hour, request for beige to be brought out- we are going tropical,” you state. “Very well,” X responds back before going silent once more. 

Suiting yourself up, tying up your dress shoes and slinging a shoulder bag on, you look between the car options you have before deciding on an SUV- needing the seating space for their airport trip that awaited you. Checking your appearance one last time in the rearview mirror you rolled out the driveway and down the country roads. Your house is locked automatically with the lack of your detected presence.

Clicking on the radio, Skyfall began to play through the radio as you tapped your fingers against the steering wheel while awaiting a light change. Rolling your eyes as a driver in front of you almost clipped a pedestrian on the sidewalk wishing to cross on their signal. You pulled into the underground garage underneath the building before driving into a specific parking spot off in a dim corner. It scans the bottom of your car, clicking with approval once finding your matching icon before lowering you deeping into the ground. You smile seeing the various sports cars and SUVs already parked in a line- workers busy or some that even worked through the night as you smile at Samanatha as she waves you in from the front desk, settling yourself in the office once more you read through Lasswell's report before sending out the email. Back your bags boys, we are going international.

↳ Taglist: @thriving-n-jiving @cringeycookies @lilliumrorum @brokenpieces-72 @infpt-zylith @kaoyamamegami @ashy-kit @notsaelty @hindi-si-ikay @sleepyycatt

[gender-trash]

you know the tumblr aesthetic houses/aesthetic interiors blogs? the ones that post exclusively unsourced images usually ganked from instagram or pinterest?

ai image generation has taken over that entire corner of tumblr like a parasite, and because i content tag for ai generated images i need to zoom in and squint every fucking time -- but i follow a lot of blogs who talk a big game about being anti-"AI art" and seem to, like. not realize? when they are in fact reblogging ai generated images (i suspect because they look more like photos than like digital paintings or w/e).

anyway here's my set of tips for recognizing ai generated aesthetic house photos on tumblr. we're gonna use this post as an example:

check the source: on posts by this species of aesthetic photo aggregation blog, there may be some kind of text that purports to be "a source" (in days of yore, sometimes if you googled this you would find some kind of instagram page that itself aggregated stolen image content; occasionally it was even the actual photographer). in our example post the text is "Thierrynuchanant", which might be a street name or a photographer's mononym or an instagram or all manner of other things, but the entire first page of google results was exclusively this tumblr post or reblogs of it, so i feel pretty confident in assuming it's completely made-up.

(this by itself is a weak signal that the image is also completely made-up, but, like... if it ISN'T, it's still a blatantly stolen unsourced photo. but if you're active in this corner of Aesthetic Tumblr i guess you've already made your peace with that.)

inspect the architecture: this particular house makes it tricky because it's purposefully artsy and asymmetric, and how the hell do i know the architect didn't make all the window frames different on purpose? so instead of asymmetry, keep an eye out for misalignments, things that don't make physical sense, or things that are mismatched but look similar from a distance (typically if you are doing something purposefully mismatched, you want to draw attention to the contrast -- so, an all-black outfit with one black sock and one bright green sock is purposeful, but an all-black outfit with one black sock and one dark gray sock looks like you made some sort of laundry error).

what the fuck is this pointy archway thing that's only on one half of the window? where does it attach?

these lit-up yellow windows look like really fancy and decorative leaded glass (i mean, i *think*; the image is blurry enough that it's hard to tell), so it's weird that they look similar in color but the left one has a diamond-ish pattern and the right one has vaguely gothic arching tracery that is replicated NOWHERE else in the house

the windowsill looks lumpy and, uh, irradiated, and the planterboxes are at two different heights. also come to mention it how are the planterboxes even attached to the thick stone sill?

why are there two slightly different styles of lamp thing at two different heights

windowpanes crooked??? also if you squint the stonework on the window frame doesn't actually make sense or depict anything

this mostly-hidden rectangular architectural mass seems to switch from modern with rectangular windowpanes on the left to elaborate tracery on the right, and the angles don't quite match up either. (i also spent a while squinting at that inverted nipple thing to the right of the round window but like, i don't know a hell of a lot about french art nouveau vernacular architecture, maybe it's... a disused utility hookup???)

plants that aren't in pots: this is the dead giveaway. ai generated images LOVE to have non-climbing plants just vibing on the side of a building.

this is not a fucking epiphyte it needs DIRT SOMEWHERE

okay now i gotta hunt down another example image so i can provide examples of mangled text and maybe mismatched architectural details in other styles. brb

[curio-queries]

FACE, LETTER, & CLOSER THAN THIS

Disclaimer: The following post is full of my own opinions and interpretations. I do not share this with the intent to convince anyone else that this meaning upholds for all. My interpretations are also limited to English and that is an important distinction to make when accessing art from another language and culture. There are absolutely intentions and meanings that won't translate. Art is beautifully subjective, and I hope you all find your own reasons to love Jimin's music.

This is quite a lengthy post. Thank you to anyone who reads. I'd love to hear your thoughts as well, so don't feel shy to share! 💜

So FACE has been out for nearly a year, why am I making this post now? Honestly, it's all because of Closer Than This and the few nuggets we can glean from the music video. The very first clip of the mv is of Jimin's team discussing the lyrics and then Jimin's recording session. Honestly, I was quite surprised CTT was written at the same time as all of the FACE songs.

So the question then rises: Why wasn't CTT included in FACE? The answer I've arrived at is because CTT is not part of the journey Jimin was describing with FACE. More on CTT below but first, we need to revisit FACE:

TIMELINE

(US dates - I have to do too much timezone manipulation in my job, I'm not spending the time here):

30 DEC 2018 : Promise Release on SoundCloud

21 FEB 2023 : FACE announcement

16 MAR 2023 : Set Me Free pt.2 Release

23 MAR 2023 : FACE Release

22 DEC 2023 : Closer Than This Release

And here's the FACE schedule:

MOTTO-THEME-GUIDE

These phrases are ALL OVER the FACE project! They're in the digital media that was released, on pretty much every side of the physical albums, on the back of the photocards and postcards... They're pretty much on everything official connected to FACE. They're not just fluff included to fill up space; these words have MEANING in this project. I've been using these phrases as guide posts to help me interpret some of the meanings behind FACE recently, and I would encourage anyone interested in Jimin's deeper message to do the same. I've highlighted my references below.

Circles of Resonance Reflection of vulnerable minds and unexposed wounds. An echo, tremor and small movement to reach you. Face of facing the deepest part of inner-self. Face, the reflection of myself in an unfamiliar appearance. Waves originated from the deepest invisible inner world, pass through the face on the surface and reach others to resonate while transmitting the inner voice. Waves spread beautifully, finding its own flow despite wounds and distortions from a smallest scratch. The face of unwavering effort despite repeated falls and pain.

When asked what the album was about, Jimin freely shares that it relates to the events during the pandemic...and then the conversation usually moves on without any deeper discussion. This interview is probably the most verbose Jimin was any time he described the meaning behind FACE. If you haven't watched it recently, I highly recommend it.

We know that Jimin rarely shares the problems he's having whilst he's going through them (with us at least). He always waits until after he's moved on so that he can tell us not to worry, that it's in the past. (This concept comes up again in this post so keep it in mind.)

The distinction that I think is important to make is that, yes, FACE is about the pandemic, but it's not a straightforward diary of events. It's about how those events affected him. How the waves caused by the pandemic RESONATE, ECHO, and TREMOR through him - effecting the UNEXPOSED WOUNDS. Jimin found something in himself through this experience and had no choice but to FACE it. There were no distractions anymore, no pushing it to the side to deal with later. And he was able to share that journey with us in such a tragically beautiful way.

THE TRACKS

I made the below gifs for each track but I think they look best as a set without the tags so you can get the full effect of the differing ripples. Check out this post to see what I mean. ☺️

FACE-OFF

I know everyone likes to meme about Face-Off and trying to find who hurt Jimin to make them pay...but I really don't associate Face-Off with an external person. You can betray yourself in much worse ways than anyone else can because you know exactly all of your own weaknesses. You know exactly what pretty lies to tell yourself. And honestly, the source of the event doesn't really matter in the context of FACE. I view Face-Off as the initial incident. The SMALLEST SCRATCH that pushes the waves to spread.

There's also a lovely bit of foreshadowing with the lyric "Like crazy, everyone shout out, yeah yeah". CIRCLES OF RESONANCE. Not singular, multiple; we are in for a bumpy ride.

INTERLUDE : DIVE

I admit, I only listen to this track when I'm doing a full album listen. I love instrumental tracks but this isn't instrumental to me, it's sound effects. And I just personally have a sensory issue that comes out to play here BUT it's important to include in our discussion so don't skip it when you're trying to delve into the meanings!

The message I glean here is just how pervasive the issue is becoming. Jimin can be going about his life, trying to disregard it but the UNEXPOSED WOUNDS are there lurking underneath it all.

The pretty music overlaying the track may sound like glitz and glam, but this is just the beginning of the WAVES SPREADING BEAUTIFULLY, FINDING ITS OWN FLOW DESPITE WOUNDS AND DISTORTIONS...

LIKE CRAZY

I've been promising a post on Like Crazy for ages and this may be the closest I get to it. Let me know if any of you are interested in a more in-depth discussion on how the movie and the song work together. My short summary for both is this: there are moments when you willfully take actions that you KNOW are against your best interest. Not in a fleeting eats-too-many-cookies way. In a I-know-putting-my-hand-on-the-stove-and-turning-it-on-will-burn-me way.

I hope none of you experience this to such a damning extent. I have. Despite being the kind of person who I thought would never venture down such a path. It's not something I wish upon anyone. This is the WAVES ORIGINATED FROM THE DEEPEST INVISIBLE INNER WORLD, PASS THROUGH THE FACE ON THE SURFACE...

ALONE

Have you ever repeated a word enough that it starts to sound bizzare? What if you got the point where you thought the weird sound was reality? And then you were confronted with the truth. This song is that point. Where you are left with the sober understanding of yourself. FACE, THE REFLECTION OF MYSELF IN AN UNFAMILIAR APPEARANCE.

SET ME FREE pt.2

The rise! Jimin was able to find a way to push himself beyond the betrayal of himself. It absolutely wasn't easy and there were setbacks, but this is a clear call to any who find themselves in similar circumstances: you CAN overcome. THE FACE OF UNWAVERING EFFORT DESPITE REPEATED FALLS AND PAIN.

Remember when I said earlier that Jimin only tells us about his struggle once it's over? I honestly believe that's why SMF was the pre-release track. He needed us to know that there was a happy ending before he would tell us about the pain he went through.

LIKE CRAZY (English Version)

As I mentioned my sensory issue above, I cannot talk about Like Crazy without mentioning the whispered English at the beginning/end. I HATE it sooooo much! It just twigs my brain in all the wrong ways. It's a huge part of why it took me a long time to appreciate LC. As much as I hate it though, it's absolutely necessary for the interpretation of LC. It firmly gives us a landmark into where and how the song relates to the movie. It also creates a bookend structure that gives the original and the English versions their own rightful places to exist.

LETTER

My very first post on this blog was a simple comparison of the lyrics in Like Crazy from the translation on the original music video to the english version. There is absolutely a difference here and I think it's a very important distinction that there are two versions of Like Crazy in the album. One is AN ECHO, TREMOR AND SMALL MOVEMENT TO REACH YOU. This phrase is for us, the audience. None of the other phrases use "you". Even though Jimin has set himself free, there are still CIRCLES RESONATING.

If you have seen any of my posts prior to this, you likely know how obsessed with Letter I am. I have the hardest time naming anything as a favorite (even favorite colour, there's just sooo many good uses of different colors) so I hope you understand how revolutionary it is for me to unequivocally state that Letter is my favorite song. Like ever. For all of my (cough*decades*cough) of music-listening, opinion-having life. Letter is THE ONE. Letter is it. I probably have stronger feelings about Letter than any relationship I've been in (but I'm aspec so take that with a grain of salt...)

I listen to Letter A LOT (sometimes on literal repeat - there's a video on YouTube that loops it for over an hour and I've definitely contributed several of those listens) and while working on this post, I would still get emotional hearing it at the end of FACE. This song is the absolute definition of the beauty that can only truly be understood after utter tragedy.

To me, Letter is about how this experience has effected Jimin to the point where there's a noticeable difference in the way he interacts with and appreciates those he loves, in all interpretations of the word love. WAVES...REACH OTHERS TO RESONATE WHILE TRANSMITTING THE INNER VOICE.

I am not using this post to debate the merits of exactly who Letter is for: a significant other, ARMY, or Jimin himself. Frankly, I don't think it matters to the meaning of the song. Use whatever flavour most appeals to you. That's the real genius and gift of Jimin's music imo. He creates it in such a way that we can fold it around our own personal stories and needs.

WHAT WAS THIS POST ABOUT AGAIN?

Right, so rewind to the release of Closer Than This. I'd had very little sleep as I traveled for the holidays and was absolutely feeling the timezone difference. But I stayed up to hear Jimin's new song. I listened to it first in Spotify and thought it sounded like a beautiful, happy, well-produced gift of a song - perfect for the end of the year and to comfort us with his departure for military service. Then I watched the mv to read the subtitles... Y'all, I absolutely was NOT expecting to see clips from the time covered in Jimin's Production Diary! I wouldn't have been surprised if it was the same team that Jimin worked with before but at a later time - he trusts them artisically after all. BUT these clips were the same angles and same conversations we saw from the development of FACE.

So I started my due diligence. Is it possible CTT was supposed to be part of FACE but they held it specifically to release when it did? I listened to FACE multiple times trying to insert CTT into the narrative. And it just doesn't fit this journey...at all. Like not in the slightest. I thought maybe immediately after Letter or even replacing Letter but no. I even tried inserting Promise as a bridge and it just doesn't work in the context of FACE.

CTT has a pretty literal storytelling narrative. It describes the journey WE have been on with Jimin. It lists his promises to US going forward. The music video being an album of memories, supports the nostalgic and loving viewpoint of the song. It has absolutely nothing to do with how Jimin was affected by the events of the pandemic or anything he found inside himself because of it.

Both songs have been described by Jimin as a 'fan song' and as I described in this post, there are many reasons that support both of them falling into this categorization. To me, Letter is more about Jimin having a deep intimate conversation with us because he trusts us. While CTT is literally about the relationship between ARMY and Jimin.

Anyway, I think that's all I've got to say about it for now. What are your thoughts? Should Closer Than This have been included in FACE? Was it just a marketing ploy to keep generating our interest after Jimin left?

(BTW I'm really happy with those FACE gifs and how the ripples look when they're together. They took some time to figure out. I just wish I had some better software to turn them into gifs so the colours display better, but alas, beggars can't be choosers. They look really great in the ppt that I made them in but I guess that's just for me to enjoy!)

[qumiiiquinnquin]

im scared to tell my psychiatrist i tried to end myself twice within a month (sep-oct). i dont know why i am. i have to call the office myself since im an adult now, but im really scared making phonecalls. i have to do it because its been since april that ive seen my psychiatrist but i have to do it. i dont know when ill do it, im too scared. that fear frustrates my family a lot. i feel like im already a failure of an adult and will continue to be like that forever.

today was mostly good, just uneventful until this evening. but now im feeling depressed and i want to cry until i cant anymore, but i cant cry, so i just feel bad. i dont feel tired so i dont want to sleep, but its almost midnight so i should soon. im feeling stressed out about needing to call the psychiatrist's office, so i dont feel like i can relax at all.

ive just been feeling bad a lot lately but thats not new, i say think that to myself every other week or so. whats making me sad the most right now is hating my art. i dont have any confidence in my art but i want to get better, but i dont think i ever will. i will always have mediocre talent, no matter how hard i try. i keep thinking about burning my physical art and either deleting my digital art or just even destroying my laptop, though the latter is very excessive, but i still think about it every now and then out of frustration. i want to give up but i really dont know what else id do, ive always drawn since i was very little, its always made me happy. i really want to not care how upset stopping would make people, including myself, but if i dont stop out of just purely giving up, i probably will stop because i k!lled myself.

every day is feeling the same, it even felt that way when classes were still going. i got so used to the schedule that i got used to the systematic cycle. i partially dont want classes to start again because of that, its boring and the amount of work is stressful, im just going to go back to breaking down and nearly attempting from stress and lack of confidence that i can really do this, that i can really power through and get the degree i want. i keep getting told im smart and always work hard, but that really doesnt mean anything now. being and doing those things doesnt suddenly mean that because of those things, ill survive the stress. it only actually makes it worse, like im ridiculous for feeling the pressure and have the mental health collapses that i do because of college, that im not trying hard enough and am lazy.

for some reason the desire for love has been on my mind and i dont know why, youve seen the pathetic longing things i say about romance. right now i feel like i am missing out and am a failure by societal standards for not even have dated in my life, and i still dont have a partner at 18 years old. i feel extremely lonely to the point that seeing other couples makes me depressed, which is probably selfish of me. i feel like and believe now that i will always be alone. i know i am not beautiful to anyone, i know i am not funny, i am not interesting, im a pain in the ass, im too much to deal with and am just unlovable in general. i hate feeling this way, i never cared about romance or relationships and have always been repulsed at the idea of me ever being loved romantically or being in a relationship. i feel stupid. i feel like a jerk. i feel like i deserve to be alone forever, and i really do. or maybe, just end myself, if im so unlovable in every way, then why not just weed myself out? whoever takes my place will be much more worth it than i ever could be. its so stupid thinking about myself d*ing from a broken heart. "just grow up, sad excuse of a grown adult." (in quotes because its a direct thought to myself towards myself, nobody else)

i really doubt everything will get better, ive felt this same exact way for 3 years now. sad, burntout, stressed, like im nothing but a problem for my family, a burden and waste of time to be around or talk to or care about. i did attempt once in 2021 but failed, obviously im still alive. i really want to try again. im really scared of pain, so im trying to find the quickest way or the least painful option. if i just call, i can get different meds or a different dosage and i wont feel this terrible. im so childish for an adult to be unable to make a fucking phonecall. i feel like next year might be it, im not sure why i get that feeling, but i dont have any reason to keep going. im not looking forward to anything. nothing is really that fun or exciting, i just try to distract myself. i know im not wanted, and im too difficult for my family.

its now a half hour after midnight because im incapable of shutting the fuck up. i might just lay down and watch youtube or cry myself to sleep, whichever happens first

[animehouse-moe]

Shikimori's Not Just A Cutie Volume 12: Plenty of Fun To Be Had

I'm just late to everything, aren't I? Oh well, I still really really loved this volume of Shikimori's Not Just A Cutie. One of the upsides to the slower release schedule of physical volumes is that it feels so much more fresh than digital, and I can certainly say that's the case with this volume. It flies by in the blink of an eye and leaves you with a warm and comfortable smile on your face from the main relationship down to the little side comments by the various characters.

I'm 12 volumes in, and I still can't get over Maki's absolutely stunning character designs. Knowing that this series is coming to a close I can't help but excitedly think about what they'll draw up next. They're so damn good you don't even think about the environment they're in or anything like that. There's just something about how they approach the shading and transparency of some of the layers in the design that just gives it such a light and bubbly feeling. You can help but feel warm when taking in Maki's art style, and the approach to stuff like the rosy cheeks or the sparkling eyes is just so helplessly cute. It's impossible to dislike.

And once more, Maki just gets fashion, they get what the fans want. And it's delivered upon in spades. I didn't even know I needed Izumi in an apron, but he's his mother's child that's for damn sure, it looks amazing on him with that black turtleneck. Maki's just a style master and apparently knows exactly what outfits to use to bring out the most in each character, while remaining situational and true to the characters. Like this outfit with Shikimori, as she's wearing her brother's jacket because she thought it was cool.

Maybe it's because I'm paying a bit more attention in these later volumes, or maybe it's just because Maki's making it happen, but I really love how many closeups and important scenes have been focusing on Izumi in the last few volumes. Shikimori has a habit of, well, being known for Shikimori, but once you're in the manga there's really a lot more to it.

And this volume drives it home. It opens the gates and drives characters forward even more, as Shikimori becomes more comfortable in "sharing" Izumi, and Izumi finds his own ways to be strong and helpful and independent. It's a really great piece that breathes an air of maturity and trust into their seasoned relationship now. There's nothing that could get between them, period. And it's really lovely, you feel that confidence that Shikimori and Izumi have in each other, and they find ways to complement and support each other wonderfully. They really are like a married couple.

So sure, they're not all over each other loving it up, Shikimori isn't fawning over Izumi every other second and agonizing over a way to begin to date him, like most other RomComs work with. Instead, it's drawing itself towards the natural conclusion of an intimate relationship. They don't need those public displays of affection or anything like that to prove how deep their love for each other is. Instead, we're continually shown it through the contextualization of their interactions with others. How much Shikimori loves how caring and kind and passionate Izumi is, and how Izumi loves how strong and cool and confident Shikimori is. And within that, it's really unrivaled. It almost makes you think of a more adult approach to romance which is really nice to see. It doesn't require those steamy or heated moments to expose the love between the two, and Maki certainly deserves credit for their continued effort on that front.

[honest-moth-of-silver-grove]

Hiii just found your blog and all your mothman reblogs are so REALLL i love him sm 😭😭😭 anyw I'd like to request a match up if you don't mind (it says in your pinned post that your ask box will be closed in the coming days so idk if that means it's closed now or not and if so dw abt it!) It's my first time asking for a match up so bare w me 😭

I'm a cis female with short shoulder length black hair that's either usually dyed or cut in some odd way (think layers/wolfcut/sometimes bangs sometimes not basically I like experimenting with hair) whose VERY short. (Think under 160cm). Physical traits wise I'm very skinny (not in a model way and more of a no matter how much I eat I burn it off TOO quickly it can get dangerous for my health) which means I'm also not physically very female iykwim. (As in I'm not blessed in the chest or ass category in life 😭)

I also have several scars on my thighs and hands due to a dog attack BUT I'm still so in love with animals and particularly have a VERY soft spot for the animals thought to be basic/unimportant. (Rodents and a lot of birds). I'm also very artistic and dabble in almost every form of art including performative, visual, written, and digital!

My biggest flaw would probably be my stubborness which gets in the way of a lot of things at times. I'm also slightly insecure about my looks and my height especially and that may cause jealousy/slight mistrusts unless dealth w a lot of communicatio. I can put people above me at times even when it isn't right because I'm loyal to them to a fault. But I'm very petty as well esp aft my trust is broken repeatedly.

Despite that I still think I'm pretty outgoing/adventurous when it comes to meeting new people altho I do get a lot of anxiety over it hahahahsdhhdjs.

The love language I love to give is physical touch, words of affirmations, and gifts. Whilst the ones I love to receive are words of affirmations and quality time. My mbti is Intp and I'm a Taurus! Also, I wouldn't mind any matchups from any media you write for except Castlevania cause I haven't gotten around to watching it just yet! (Altho I do have a preference for bg3 cause that's the media I know most well!)

I'm not sure if I said too much/too little but yeah! Again if your asks are closed dw abt it. I hope you have an amazing day/night. ✨️✨️✨️🤩🤩🤩

A/N: I hail Mothman, you hail Mothman, We ALL hail the Mothman!!! I just think he’s neat. Anyway, getting back on task because you didn't specify a gender preference, I picked one of each for you. For you, my Skinny Taurus Anon, I’m thinking your best Baldur’s Gate 3 matchups would be… Halsin (Male) and Karlach (Female)! 

Halsin would be a great match for you! He’s very kind and soft-spoken and shares your love of animals and nature. He’s especially touched that you’ve managed to maintain such love for animals after being attacked in your childhood. He finds your reverence for less cherished animals very honorable indeed. 

Halsin admires the ways that you express yourself by experimenting with your hair. In his case, he’s had the same look for a few hundred years or so, but that’s not to say he wouldn’t enjoy maybe changing up the way he styles his hair if you were willing to help him do it. Halsin loves all bodies and all body types, so there’s no need to feel insecure about being thin, or not having curves. Halsin does get concerned, however, when he feels you don’t eat enough nutritious food throughout the day. Silvanus knows he has a sweet tooth, but man nor elf cannot exist on honey and fruit alone. He wants to ensure you're getting a good amount of protein and greens in your diet, and he’s very capable of hunting dinner for you if you’d like. 

Halsin enjoys making art himself, preferring to whittle, seated next to you as you write or create your amazing digital creations. (A technology he does not understand but is very supportive of all the same.)

Being an open-hearted polyamorous druid, you’d have to have strong communication skills for a serious long-term relationship with Halsin. The two of you will need to work out a language or routine of your own to check in with one another and make sure that no serious insecurities or jealousies take hold. Speaking respectfully from the heart will be paramount here. 

Halsin’s first love language is most definitely physical touch, with acts of service coming second. He loves the feel of you- from something as simple as your hand in his to the more sensual, romantic skin-to-skin moments you share- he always wants to have a part of you against him. He loves how you show your affection through touch, and he is always eager to receive it. He’s a very generous lover, so if you ask that he give you frequent words of affirmation, he will eagerly rise to the challenge. Although, if we’re being honest, Halsin’s already quite the verbal lover, never wasting an opportunity to call you ‘my heart’. 

As an INTP, your more logical side balances out his more emotional ENFJ one. 

The two of you bring wholeness and balance to each other’s lives. 

Karlach would also be a great fit for you! She’s fun-loving, energetic, and full of zest for life, and all of that extends to her relationship with you!

She thinks the height difference between you two is absolutely adorable, and she WILL give you all the forehead kisses because of it. Karlach also loves how you experiment with your hair color. She herself has red streaks in her hair. (Not sure if that’s natural for her or if she’s dyed it, but either way, fun hair colors are something she likes.) 

She doesn’t mind that you’re skinny either, it just gives her all the more incentive to protect you. She does worry sometimes, that your thinness makes you more prone to injury or illness, but she does her best to keep those concerns to herself. She wouldn’t want to trouble you with them, besides, so long as she’s there, no one can touch you- not with your big tiefling barbarian girlfriend there to protect you. And don’t worry about the no boobs or butt thing. Karlach’s own chest is more scar tissue than anything at this point, so she doesn’t look at bodies that way. She thinks your form is fucking gorgeous because your soul is fuckoing gorgeous to her. 

And it’s a good thing you like animals, because Karlach loves them as well. She thinks the owlbear cub is just the cutest little guy she’s ever seen, and she’s glad despite your past experience, you’re not afraid of him or any animal other people might be too afraid or freaked out by to love. Also I know this is totally random, but I could totally see Karlach being a great bird mom to a macaw or a parrot. And yes, she would teach them swear words. 

Kalarch is loyal to a fault. In the past her loyalty cost her a great deal, but she still believes in having trust in the ones you love. It may take her a little bit longer to get there, but once she trusts you, she’s very much ride or die, and she expects you to be the same. 

Karlach is obsessed with anything and everything you create. She loves it all so much. She’s constantly going round showing your art to everyone in camp, bragging about how cool and creative her partner is. She’s not super artistic, and she can’t sing to save her life, but god, she loves people who are good at the arts so much. She’s amazed at their talent and you are no exception. 

As an INTP, you’ll want to be a little more sensitive around Karlach’s ESFP, especially when it comes to her expressing her emotions. She’s a strong girl, that’s for sure, she’s survived ten years in the hells! But life has not been kind to her. The people she once trusted, betrayed her, and she needs to feel secure in her romantic relationship as a result- she can’t get the sense that you’re being insincere or just biding your time as she shares how she feels. 

I hope you enjoyed it!

Please Like, but most importantly REBLOG!

Reblogs share my work with other blogs, creating a wider audience. 

A/N 2.0: Apologies for the delay. Posting will probably happen 1x/week with how things are going.

[pepijopa]

Please don't quit!! Maybe taking a break from making or uploading your art would help you feel better but I think your art is beautiful, please don't quit for good. Making art can be really hard sometimes, and loving the art that you make can be even harder. But we love your art. Your art deserves to be loved. You deserve your art to be loved. You deserve to love your art.

I can't really do that, though in the last two years it's a miracle if I get any work I still need to keep trying because it's my only source of income currently. And that alone brings me so much stress, but I am just generally frustrated because I can never seem to be happy when I draw for myself. When I do commissions or gifts for my friends, art for other people, it's all so easy and I don't struggle as much and am very happy with the results and proud of it, but when I try to get the ideas in my head for myself onto the canvas I can never seem to get it right or finish it even. Even if I get technical things right I feel like I'm not creative at all and that every single person is better even with their simple drawings ;; I just feel like I was so much more creative and better when I was younger, even if in the technical things I was worse at. But it also feels like it because I used to get multiple commissions monthly, now when I'm "better" I get maybe three, four a year if I'm lucky. It's honestly really hard to not be impacted with that and doubt myself. My pain as well has been getting worse and I'm slower and slower with drawing and it's more physically difficult- and the anxiety surrounding digital art now because of all the AI bullshit is stressing me out. I try to do traditional, but I don't have money for more canvases and paints, but it's also a lot more difficult physically for me I haven't even finished the painting I started months ago ;;

Thank you for your words though and your support I do appreciate it and it made me happy,,, I'm sorry to be negative 😭💕

[kkami-writes]

I am aliveeeee

and holy crap im so glad your back

honestly as an artist I really relate to your writing experience right now, every time I sit down with my art tablet like “WE HAVE A VISUALLY INTERESTING AND COOL IDEA, WE ARE GOING TO DO IT BY THE END OF THE NIGHT” I just sit there staring at my screen or just blatantly hating the drawing that jm making to the point that I just quit

sometimes you need to change up your medium, try writing on paper by hand!

for me, I've REALLY gotten back into traditional art, and colouring, while I love digital art I've grown burnt out from it (I started at the beginning of 2020😭 and have been non-stop for 4 years now)

I also lost like 150+ drawings when my tablet software crashed and I had to reset everything, that wasn't very good for motivation 💀 I was in mourning for like 3 weeks cause whole years' worth of drawings was gone just like that

I guess my brain likes traditional art more right now since it can't be lost as easy

your experience may differ completely so my advice may not work at all, but changing perspective really does help

when you're an artist of any kind and you start viewing your projects and art as “work” and “mandatory” It creates a big unwillingness to do the things that once made you happy

expression of self turns to guilt of not doing enough faster, guilt to resentment for when you do have (aka force yourself ) to do it etc

at the end of the day remember this isn't a job, you are blessing us with your writing FOR FREE, just because you feel inspired to do so

dont pressure yourself you're doing great

you are human, you are not a machine. 💕

I agree!! fun fact about me is that i'm a stationery whore and I collect journals/stickers/washi tape and stuff so I actually have a notebook filled with plots and ideas and it's actually how I prefer to plot or keep ideas down. of course I have a shit ton of google docs and notes on my phone but I tend to end up writing them down physically bc it's h how I retain shit half the time. and idk there's something nice about kinda just writing physically just streams of consciousness. it's why I also like to journal and stuff (i say as it's been a month since i've journaled) but anyway yeah!! also that sucks and i'm sorry you lost a lot of your shit TT that would be so devastating. I think it's always good to have backup hobbies or like you said switching from traditional to digital and vice versa when burnout occurs. I wish you luck!! <3

[spookyshoosh]

so early december i was really burnt out with doing my own digital art. in the previous months i had tried to reinvigorate my passion for visual art by getting into physical mediums again like pencil/ink drawings and watercolors. while it felt good for a little bit, i felt sadness in seeing how much my skills had regressed over time due to just not practicing/taking long hiatuses from art in general.

so,, i started learning how to crochet and like its just so good. i made a scarf for my dad for christmas and like the whole time i was making it i would get these little bursts of warm fuzziness. out of string, i’m making fabrics which i then sew together to make clothing. then when i gave the scarf to my father, he wore it and enjoyed the colors and how soft and warm it was. the feeling was absolutely invigorating!

i got a set for ergonomic hooks and a yarn bag for christmas by my boyfriend bc he saw how much i liked making the scarf. i indulged myself with the christmas money i got and bought myself some legit merino/angora wool yarn. it was like so fuckingg soft and warm. with it, i made a hat and scarf for myself. its new years now and my bf loves the hat i made for myself so he makes the trip AGAIN with me up to this boutique yarn store an hour and a half away from home so i can get more of the same yarn i made my hat out of but in a different color. i whip out this hat for him within days. he loves it. i make several more projects, two of which being; a cover for my hot water bottle and a little neck/ear warmer for my dog. all of that, however, has mostly just been practicing basic stitches, making and joining rectangles or doing simple single crochet rounds.

today, i pushed through some anxiety about trying something a little more advanced and bought yarn to make a sweater. the past couple days finishing up my last projects, i was looking at the emptiness of my yarn bag. not many scraps to work with as i’d already made little potholders and cozies already, so i began looking for new projects to consider. sweaters seemed like the next step for clothing, so i found a couple patterns. off to joanns i went in the midst of a fucking snow storm to get my sweater yarn. at this point, im confident and excited.

now, this is my first time formally using a actual crochet pattern, so i spent some time today reading the pattern and looking up an index on what all the abbreviations mean, how to size things, and a bunch of other questions that needed clarification. as i read, im actually understanding and learning and when things don’t make sense, i end up realizing what was wrong and fixing my mistake pretty easily and its not a terrible hassle.

idk man its just like,,, what if all these years this is what i was meant to do. i’ve been keeping up with it nearly every day for about a month now and i see no signs in myself of getting tired of it or wanting to quit. i want to keep learning and continue doing more stuff.

tldr; i ditched digital art for crocheting and my brain hasn’t brrrrrr’d this hard in a long time. learning new things that you’re good at is an incredible feeling.

[em0-snail]

help

Okay so!! As of right now the site is down so I can't provide screenshots and I'm going off of memory so please bear with me. Also I don't know what you need help with specifically so I'm just gonna go over the basics and if you have any other questions feel free to ask :))

Just to make sure everyone is on the same page, art fight is a yearly event where you upload your own characters and are assigned a team. You attack people to gain points for your team, and attacking people is basically just drawing their oc.

And just a heads up, while I'm not too sure this will happen this year, almost every year so many new people join art fight and try to upload their attacks on the 1st of July the sites server's get overwhelmed and site goes down alot. It happens. I recommend saving a few refs before the games begin and draw them after July 1st (you aren't allowed to draw anyone's characters before the 1st, keeps things fair). Like I said, it happens. Sometimes the site is only down off and on during the first few days and is fine the rest of the month, sometimes it's down so long they add an extra week to the games. It really just depends lol. Like I said save refs now so you can actually start on the 1st.

You can have up to 100 active characters and as far as I know there isn't a limit to how many characters you can attack. Your artistic media doesn't matter, you can be a traditional artist and still participate, you can be a digital artist and still participate, hell you can be exclusively building physical sculptures of folk's characters and you're still allowed to participate.

You can find other users to attack a variety of ways, ranging from searching through tags or through spamming the random character button until you find one you like, you can also just ask around here on Tumblr and see if anyone is participating this year:))

Not everyone has a little card like this but here's mine! It has my username and my favorite/featured characters on it. Again you do not need to have one of these but if you want to find people on artfight you might wanna be on the lookout for cards like these.

As for uploading your characters, I'm gonna use my boy Smudge as an example.

You can only upload 7 pictures per character. Usually folks don't need many more than 3. I recommend having a full body ref

As nice as this drawing is, if anyone wants to draw him they need to see more.

Something like this is alot better, it shows what he looks like without his costume and again gives the potential attacker a better idea of who they're drawing.

You have the option to upload a description of your oc, alot of folks tend to leave it blank and honestly I don't recommend doing that. You don't need to put your OC's full 129 page google doc backstory in there but you should at least give a basic description of their personality and any important information (it might also be a good idea to put their pronouns, I have on multiple occasions accidentally misgendered a few characters because their pronouns weren't in their description)

Permissions are different than a description. Permissions basically means what you are and aren't okay with. For Smudge here I prefer if he keeps his costume. You generally don't have to specify to not draw gore of a character as I've only gotten gore of a character once since like 2017 (and I put that I would love to see some gore in their character permissions).

Uploading attacks is pretty simple. Like I said before you can attack others regardless of how you make your art. Traditional art tends to get less points than digital art. You get more points depending on what you do (ex. A digital headshot sketch would get less points than a fully lined fully colored and shaded traditional drawing, a colored simple animation gets more points than digital line art, ECT). Obviously don't lie about what you're making to get more points. From what I've seen other folks don't tend to lie so don't be a dick lol. And even if some does lie about what they did, I believe you can flag art and report it. Plus a week after art fight is over a bunch of mods go through the art and make sure everything has been properly marked (if you think you marked something wrong though don't worry!! You aren't gonna get in trouble or anything, worse case scenario you'll just lose a few points for your team).

I know this is a lot and I know I definitely forgot something but again feel free to ask if you have anymore questions :3

[bigjimbopickens]

Hi! I wanna say I love your art first of all! I just read the message under your last post about Kevin’s art video and you said you’re mostly self taught - I’m curious about how you get into that? I’d love to learn to draw but have no idea where to start!

Sorry for getting back to this so late I am not as active on Tumblr. And yes, I am mostly self-taught because of my circumstances growing up. To those who don't know, I am SnowfallWarning/Big Jimbo and I am currently an animation student. I do 2D animation, concept art and character design and I graduate this year (hopefully). I am disabled both physically and mentally which is why I mostly do digital art. I have a coordination disorder (dyspraxia) and am blind in one eye but that doesn't stop me. For my entire childhood I was discouraged from drawing as I apparently wouldn't go anywhere with it or that I was terrible. Where I lived most of my life had no opportunities for someone like me so I had to leave to continue pursuing art. Because of the poor access, the only things I had was notebooks, school supplies and an old iPad mini to draw with growing up. I learned everything I currently know now from using those. I don't know what got me into drawing still, may have been Warrior Cats and dinosaurs. Like what Jose said in Kevin's video, art comes from the soul. It is human expression and we've always been doing it. Anyone can be an artist and we all start somewhere, trust me. Here's some stuff I usually tell people because I do get asked this often (I'm also not the best teacher): 1: Experiment. Find what works for you. Be messy with it, not every piece needs to be perfect. If you are a digital artist then also trying different programs can be helpful too. Maybe you're better at drawing landscapes, characters or abominations that defy God. 2: Use references if necessary. Not sure why for a while it was considered "cheating" to use references. Everyone in the industry uses references, I would know. If you also want, you can try tutorials but I found I learn more from references. 3: Take inspiration. I'm always adding things I see in other people's art to my own style if I like it. Though try not to copy them. 4: Tracing. I believe tracing is okay for learning purposes. It's how I learned to draw humans after doing exclusively furry art for years tbh. I tend to stick to real-life references for this, this is a great site for practice: https://line-of-action.com (if you're not okay with nudity then do remember to turn that off). "But where do I even start?" Grab a piece of paper and pencil (or open a blank canvas on a digital art program if you prefer that) and just start doodling whatever. If you have an idea then go for that as well. Every class I've had in college so far has started with drawing and rendering a bunch of shapes to see where everyone was at and to get a feel of our styles. So maybe try that too. Draw random shapes with different materials/brushes, colour them in and add details like shadows and highlights. I know it seems ridiculous but I do it every once in a while to experiment and try different methods. You probably won't improve overnight. Hell, it took me 7 years to get to where I currently am. A lot of people quit because they think they're not good enough when pretty much every artist is only proud of about 10% of their work. Definitely the case for me. Not every piece is going to be a masterpiece and the imperfections can be what makes it special, so please don't be so hard on yourself. Don't be discouraged because other artists may be better than you either, they've probably been doing it for longer. So please, if you are dedicated enough, keep trying. I'm sure you will get somewhere :) So basically, - Use whatever material you got and draw what comes to mind, even if it's terrible it is a great start. - Experiment with your style and/or materials. - Reference, take inspiration and trace for memory. - Don't give up but do take breaks to avoid burnout. - Try not to be intimidated by other artists, we also don't really know what we're doing tbh (and just as afraid of you as you are of us).

I hope that all made sense and was somewhat helpful :)

[little-mouse-gardens]

🌸Rottmnt oc head-cannons🌸

Part 1 : Marcy

So I’m gonna be doing hcs for sunny, Marcy, Skye and Angie but I won’t be going in order. This will just be random hcs I have for them as well as their relationships with the turtles.

Right now Im gonna start off with Marcy!

- marcy likes to go thrift shopping for old clothes she can re-vamp, somehow comes home with like a box full of clothes and fabrics. Uses as inspiration for designing new clothes and items in her sketchbook.

- has a space in her room for Donatello to come hang out and relax if he needs a little bit of peace and quiet away from his brothers. Makes sure none of the gadgets he makes over in her room are messed with or damaged.

- her and Donatellos first date took place at an 80s themed pizza restaurant. They gave each other a gift, he made her a upgraded version of a switch and she made him a purple satin jacket with his genius tech trademark and his name on the back.

- one of her favorite snacks is strawberry pop-tarts and mini waffles

- her and Donnie like to learn from one another. They listen to each other info-dump about each others interests and hyper-fixations. The both of them do enjoy and love working together, she may or may not have her own workbench in his lab and a spot in the turtle tank.

- Marcy cannot stand the feeling of cotton balls against her skin. She claims it makes her want to curl up on herself, so she goes out of her way not to to come into too much contact with them.

- marcy and Donnie like to make care packages or get gifts for each other. She personally goes out of her way and buys him a new weighted blanket after he makes her an automatic paint brush cleaner since she told him her hands are cramping.

- Marcy’s theme song would be curses by the crane wives

- Marcy has a pair of glasses Donnie made for her when he confessed to her (he accidentally broke her og ones-he thought the new ones she got were much more durable)

- always has some form of paint splatter or art related mark on her skin even if it seems small

- organizes her art supplies and sewing supplies by color and type.

- has two closets in her room to hold the clothes and items she makes and revamps

- Can’t stand when her pillow is warm. Like it physically makes her angry

- mostly has random art travel supplies and every day items in her messenger bag that she Carrie’s around. (Also an extra pair of glasses just in case they get broken)

- Seasonal allergies are her worst enemy

- good at Digital and traditional art. Loves making stuff into charms, buttons ect. Made matching genius built charms for Donnie and herself

- Enjoys the sights and sounds of thunderstorms until the wind picks up (loud wind? Not the biggest fan)

- takes incredible care of her guppies and goldfish. The koi fish she got has a separate tank from the guppies. Likes to ad natural occurring plants into the tanks and tries to make a self sustaining healthy environment for her fishes.

- Marcy wasn’t diagnosed with autism until she was in elementary school when the girls mother Adrianna, a nurse, was finally able to get a doctor to listen. Is super grateful that her moms understanding and fierce nature, plus she was the first person to teach her how to draw.

- farming and fantasy rpgs are her favorite games

Some hcs for Donnie and Marcy

- Donatello enjoys holding hands with Marcy. Giving them a gentle squeeze. Enjoying the feeling of her hand laced in his. The warmth and softness of them. A silent but affectionate gesture they share with each other.

- Donnie thought she’d be bored by all the rambling about his tech and how it works, but was surprised to see she was actively listening. She remembered a few parts he needed and actually brought them by the next time she and her sisters came over to the lair.

- his favorite thing about Marcy, other than her personality, is the way she smiles. Something about the way the corners of her eyes crinkle and the lopsided sweet smile she can have makes his emotionally unavailable bad boy heart flutter

- always fixing each others goggles and glasses. Both absentmindedly and intentionally. Donnie always keeps a spare on him for just in case hers breaks and she always makes sure to clean his goggles off for him.

- team up against the purple dragons all.the.time, their second date literally was going great and the purple dragons almost ruined it and had to be dealt with

- after several trusting moments, Donnie does allow Marcy to examine his soft shell. She is super careful and constantly asks him if he’s okay or not. Compliments his shell and his mutation, which may or may not have caused him to happy churr and have tail waggles at the same time

- physical contact gets built up over time, but there is no doubt that the both of them are cuddle bugs with each other after they take it slowly. Especially during winter and fall.

- both of them Defiantly pick up on each other when one or the other are having a sensory overload or uncomfortable in a situation. Marcy won’t hesitate to gently pull Donnie to the side somewhere quiet and lend him her noise canceling headphones. Gives him a comfort snack or drink and just tries to be there for him if he needs her.

- the same with Donnie. Keeps a literal notes of what she likes, dislikes ect. What textures, tastes, sights and sounds she is uncomfortable and makes sure to help her avoid them as much as possible.

- hating slimy textures or residue solidarity 🤝

- donnie keeps a bunch of notes and information about Marcy’s likes and dislikes alphabetically

- Marcy is honestly Not afraid to call donnie out for being in the wrong. Even if it’s small. For example in the mystic library, she pointed out the fact that he should have just written the location down. Stating that despite his genius mind, he’s got a bad habit of being a bit too overconfident

- Definitely dance with one another to 80s music. They Work on getting better at dancing all the time.

[hanaflowersofficial]

For the anon ask, how did Tillo and Jhett meet? And who is Jhett? Also I really love your art style!!

thanks so much for this ask!!! i'm excited that i finally have time to answer it :3

i'll put this under a read-more because i'm sure i'll get wordy, plus there's a couple lil drawings, and there's gonna be brief mention of oviposition and i know that's not everyone's cup of tea hahah (sweats)

all right, so to give some background here, Tillo was a royal guard, specifically he was the queen's closest guard. Tillo was in love with her for yearrrrrs and years, never once made a move because that's how loyal and by-the-books he used to be.

but the queen liked to play games with him, and one time King Vegeta caught them when she was too close for comfort. King Vegeta was gonna have Tillo executed, but the queen felt guilty and talked him down to exile, so Tillo was shipped off-planet. a year later, planet Vegeta is destroyed by Freeza.

all of that sets Tillo on a downward spiral. he's severed from his people, his queen, everything that made him proud to be Him. so he slowly begins to self destruct and ruin himself now that he believes his life serves no purpose.

he drinks, gets into dangerous situations, gets himself hurt, beat up, worse. he takes increasingly hazardous jobs for increasingly seedy individuals. he steals, he betrays, maims, he kills. if the money's good he really doesn't care what the job is.

enter Jhet.

Jhet's species is called a Quall. Qualls are very lawful and generally peaceful, they have rules and regulations and red tape and forms for every little thing. Jhet's 140 years old but he's still considered "young" by his people (about mid-30s in our years), and even though he's a younger Quall he runs a very successful import/export business and is super wealthy. i can't decide if he has a fiance in the story...if he does, it makes a lot of things a lot messier (and thus harder to plot haha)

so Tillo gets hired to kill him. by who? haven't decided yet. he gets into Jhet's mansion at night, intent on taking him out in his sleep (Qualls are peaceful, but they're generally bigger and stronger). he ends up interrupting Jhet in the middle of some tryst.

see, Qualls are egg-layers, and generally they need another (warmer) species to lay their eggs in. of course there are specific species that are legally acceptable, and both parties have to undergo rigorous health screenings and there's tons of shit to sign, it's a whole process.

so Tillo interrupts Jhet and this dude right before the deed would've been done, and the dude just bolts. now Jhet's in a bind because the physical process of laying the eggs is like...ready to happen. and there's no time for any of the legal stuff.

and so Jhet, in his desperation, pleads for his life by offering Tillo like ten times what he was paid for the hit, plus of course food and lodging while the eggs are growing. he can't have Tillo speed off into space with his precious eggs.

Tillo accepts, and i'll spare everyone the details, but he basically spends the next month or so living it up in luxury in Jhet's mansion. and it turns out that eating, bathing, and sleeping regularly have profound impacts on one's mental health, and Tillo starts to feel...good. and it doesn't hurt that Jhet dotes on him constantly and treats him kindly.

(THIS ISN'T THEIR REAL SIZE DIFFERENCE THIS IS A JOKE LMAO)

my thought is that they end up in this arrangement year after year after year, Tillo living his typical life for 11 months and then spending one with Jhet. of course over time they both realize they love each other. :') or, well, Jhet figures out his own feelings pretty early on. Tillo takes a lot longer, poor damaged thing.

okay my god.... i'm so sorry for that novel but i just love these guys so much. if anyone has read all of this, i'm giving you one digital candy of your choice and my eternal thanks.