#I just want us to feel ok
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
i have started asking myself āhow can i make this more fun?ā in regards to the things i have to do and it is such a small difference but it brings me so much delight
#š#sagittarius posting#but really like i just let myself stim however i want and i let myself do my weird silly harmless stuff#i used to be sooooo self conscious even when all alone! so this has been making me feel braver in a weird and unexpected way#i love joy i will never stop seeking it out!!!#ok to rb#š¦
10K notes
Ā·
View notes
Text
been thinking about the sinnohtrio lately......plus misc other stuff
also, casual ko-fi drop!! get something in this sketchy style starting at $10 woop woop
#finally decided to do a commission test run u_u#pokemon#trainer lyra#trainer kris#trainer dawn#trainer lucas#rival barry#rival silver#ayalumi#hisuian zorua#luxio#timeskip tag#rkgk#anyway it's sinnoh time !!!#still figuring out their designs and lore but this works for now#god's specialest little guys & their very normal bestfriend who they would kill/die for. up to interpretation who is killing/dying#dawn is the platinum protag who meets giratina and becomes champion#distortion world affected her way more than compared to cynthia and cyrus since she's still a developing kid. but hey cool ghost hair!#4-5 yrs later lucas gets blasted to hisui..lost his memory for the three years he's there and when arceus sends him back he's just like Man#the entire time barry is CHILLING PLAYING HAVING FUN#and forever worried abt his friends ): dawn & lucas are soo nonchalant about what happened to them it's a bit concerning to everyone else#design comments umm the only thing that matters is that they still have their og scarves š#and i guesss these are spring/summer outfits. winter dawn gets leggings and big coat ok. she already has too much yin energy#btw i use the cleanse tag as the direct opposition to the spell tag even tho that's probably not a real thing LOL)#oh yea barry wears the tower master ribbon 24/7. tower tycoon in training and won't shut up about it (i love him)#character dynamics i will talk abt that in another post if i feel like it... these days i just want to go replay pla aughh
1K notes
Ā·
View notes
Text
I love you messy artstyle i love you visible brush strokes I love you textures and rough edges I love you imperfections I love you roughness and colour blobs I love you scratchy sketches and bold stylisation and dirt and imperfections I love you ugly and raw emotion!!!!! ā¤ļø
#i talk sometimes#art talk#i made a tweet like this on twatter ages ago but i've been feeling this a lot lately#also this is the start of me writing more on this blog and not only using it as art because who cares!! i don't!!#I wanna translate raw emotion into colors and shapes. I wanna know where to ignore all details and where to go ham you feel me?#i used to dream about developing a style like for MtG where it looked like a masterful oil painting that oozes realism and details#and i've realised the last two years or so that I would actually hate that for me. I know I wouldn't enjoy doing it. For myself.#it's that pipeline from wanting to be the perfect realistic wotc artist to accepting that I will never be that#instead i wanna learn how to stylise better and get a good brush economy going yknow. I wanna be bolder.#i doubt i'll ever be as incredible as all these MtG artists no matter what anyone says. but it's ok!! i don't have to be!!!#i just luv art man!!
3K notes
Ā·
View notes
Text
Learn from who? Learn from you?
Chen Bowen as CHEN YI & Chiang Tien as AI DI KISEKI: DEAR TO ME (2023)
#kiseki: dear to me#kisekiedit#kdtm#kiseki dear to me#ai di x chen yi#chen yi x ai di#nat chen#chen bowen#louis chiang#chiang tien#jiang dian#userspring#uservid#pdribs#userspicy#userjjessi#*cajedit#*gif#uh huh. mmhm. parallels and shit#OK LIKE. in nice words ai di essentially tells chen yi to go for it BUT bc hes a Lil Shit he says it like 'use force to PROVE how you feel.#followed by '.....OH WAIT YOU CANT BEAT HIM'. the way he rubs that in chen yi's face too like it isnt even 'youre weaker than him.'#it's you're LOWER than him. & thats why ai di calls him a coward bc therell always be a divide between chen yi & cdy that chen yi wont cros#and the point of this is - okay i know chen yi is literally picking ai di up and throwing him around here but also you have to remember#ai di LETS HIM. ai di doesnt fight back as hard as he could and that puts them on EVEN. EQUAL. GROUND. every time.#& yeah theres some comedy to it but you cant Ever forget that ai di wants chen yi to want him. needs it. he's faking sleep in the 1st scene#and once chen yi realizes what he wants he puts everything he has into keeping it - inadvertently taking ai di's advice by doing so -#& expresses it in every kind of way too. whatever it takes. bc between the two of them its not just 'bring him back' it's 'bring him HOME'#in a way thats based on the constantly being witness to the worst of each other & choosing it AND. years and layers of trust & love.#..ok only I would take a gifset of chen yi picking ai di up & make it abt how their relationship is perfectly balanced. but im right so idc#the last one ties it all together in my onion. chen yi got him home. and ai di's deliberately allowing himself to be loved. they won
515 notes
Ā·
View notes
Text
I haven't seen anybody post the full Riddle Chain yet (including Silas Birchtree) so here you go :)
I didn't find any of these codes myself by the way! I'm not sure who to credit for the rest of them, but I did get the Silas Birchtree code from @dismissivedestroyer (sorry for tagging you ^_^" if you don't want to be tagged let me know and i can edit the post). You can also get the answer using the code "STOD EHT TCENNOC"
(SPOILERS BELOW)
RIDDLE (would you like to play a game) > YES (what's Mcgucket's favorite soda?) > MOUNTAIN DONT (what's a medieval homonym?) > LYRE LIAR (the 20th ingredient of Anti-Cipherzing Tonic?) > HAROLDS RAMBLINGS (how is clown repellant made?) > UNION MADE (Bill's govt file number?) > 29121239168518 (who comes from Zimtrez 5?) > GREBLEY HEMBERDRECK (what's on Bill's flag?) > 3466554 (what leaves a thin line in the snow?) > TINSEL SNAKE (the 6th option on Bill's editing software?) > TORTURE MENTALLY (name an unpronouncable wizard) > XGQRTHX (where do Tri Angels come from?) > 333SUNDAPPLELANECOZYCREEKIL6071494611 (Bill Cipher's Lawyer?) > CAESARATBASHVIGNERE [or] MULTI LEVEL MARK (who defeated Silas Birchtree--?) > EMMALINE BUTTERNUBBINS (you've earned a treat! enter 'DISPENSE MY TREAT' to download) > DISPENSE MY TREAT
The 'treat' you get is under the cut
"BILL FILES DO NOT OPEN"
babydonthurtme.png
billcithescienceguy.png
chernobogwithablog.png
cheshire.png
epacsdnim.png
hiya.png
irrational treasure 2 - the trembley supremacy.png
octobillfest.jpg
remember the bermuda triangle.png
scrapdoodle.png
seeyouinmydreams.png
seeyounextsummer.png
snakeyes.png
trustme.png
xwhyz.png
#im not really sure what to tag this haha#does this mean we have all the codes now?#probably not right??#apparently theres this super rare thing you get from using āalexā or āalex hirschā a bunch of times but i havent gotten it yet#i tried but i accidentally closed the tab and had to start over#also it was just getting really laggy#someone pleeeeaase post the pictures in high quality if you get it#ill be forever in your debt#gravity falls#book of bill#the book of bill#tbob#tbob spoilers#the book of bill spoilers#gravity falls spoilers#thisisnotawebsitedotcom#thisisnotawebsitedotcom.com#bill cipher#i feel bad tagging so much but i want people to see this#silas birchtree#billcipher#bill cypher#no offense but how do you misspell his name its literally everywhere#ok have fun :))#turtle talks#long post#just added the silas birchtree riddle picture to catch attention better dont mind me
485 notes
Ā·
View notes
Text
(guy who has never played cotl) haha au time
#this started as a design exercise bc i couldnt get sphinx/devon rex narinder out of my head#but the whole time i was thinking man imagine if the lamb brings him in as a follower but nobody knows he was actually. you know#and the followers are like haha wow our leader channels the power and wisdom of the one who waits almost as if they were them#would that be cool or what. anyway heres narinder reassuming his pre-bishop form and everything his flesh remembers before godhood#ok now im gonna ramble abt design notes#the singe marks were inspired by fallen angels like how some ppl say they burned while falling from heaven. i wanted smth like that when#the lamb is resurrected by nari.. their outfit is inspired by papal cloaks while narinders is based on crusader armor#the lambs name 'bellwether' is also a term used for sheep that wear a bell and lead the flock and i thought that was cool#idk what the thuribles do yet but i do have smth in mind where theyre linked together. and ofc the lamb has a shepherds staff#very proud of nari's little devil tail!! and it was hard to see bc its so dark but he has wrinkles around his forehead to conceal his#third eye. even he isnt aware of it (for now)#idk where im going with this au i just have a bunch of ideas?? basically the lamb is keeping nari's identity a secret from him so he doesnt#go down that path of powerhungry destruction. smth like trying to lead him down a better path but feels guilty lying to do that#also theyre in love with each other and theyre stupid pining idiots abt it. mwah#cult of the lamb#cotl#cotl lamb#cotl narinder#the one who waits#cotl the one who waits#narilamb#art#au#myart#my art#character design#cotl au#false prophet! au
954 notes
Ā·
View notes
Text
calling it right now that season 3 starts like this
#so confused about people saying the season finale feels like the end because to me it didn't at all#there's like 5-10 issues immediately set up for another season#they're in a happy place at this point because they've both realized their love is bigger than anything else#and makes it worth working on their problems together#the problems are still very much there#both of them have deep self esteem/self loathing issues that haven't been resolved in the week since ed woke up#ed doesn't know about stede's trauma#they haven't talked through anything#and they'll be shit at starting/running an inn lmao it's not gonna go well#and those are just some of the internal issues#then there's prince ricky and all the authorities that would very much like to get their hands on both blackbeard and stede bonnet#because stede just full-on kept using his government name after faking his death. nice one#the crew are not āgoneā they're more like off to college for a bit but will probably run into trouble immediately#again because while they escaped to the ship they didn't eliminate the threat (the british empire)#it's not a forever goodbye#ok this got super long already anyway i have a whole fic marinading in my brain until i've finished these 4 wips i'm in the middle of āļø#hope we get a renewal soon because i want to see the rest of their story!!#ofmd s2 spoilers#ofmd s2#ofmd#our flag means death
2K notes
Ā·
View notes
Text
I genuinely love not having a crush like Iām not over here feeling physically sick over some mid guy being dry to me Iām literally chilling
#Spring semester of last year was so bad bc I was unironically into 3 guys at once and they were all#Being dry and cryptic to me#And then before that in 2022 I had my horrid situationship#I had a mini obsession arc in dec 2023 over someone but now there hasnāt been anyone since#And my palette is so cleansed#When a girl is like I miss having a crush Iām like youāre literally a masochist#There was very briefly a girl I thought I had a crush on when I realized Iām bicurious but#I havenāt put effort into talking to her bc the idea of pursuing anyone makes me wanna claw my eyes out#Iām pretty sure I ghosted her by like just not responding to her last messsge actually#Not on purpose but more so bc I realized I was feeling the same anxiety I felt whenever I had a crush so I was like#Yeah Iām dropping this for now#Iām also always the most present for my friends when I donāt have a crush so idk#Like I donāt wanna be consumed by anyone I just wanna chill#The solution to not having normal attraction to people is just to not be attracted to anyone at all#I fr cracked it#I always just crave the butterflies out of it and never an actual relationship anyway#But theyāre so not worth it#Which is why I always get bored of guys whoāre forthright like oh ok you actually WANT somethingā¦. U donāt wanna just have fun#Not for me#I think the guys Iām into and I typically diverge in the sense that neither of us wants a relationship but they just wanna fuck me#And I more so just want the butterflies experience / to playact couple for like a couple months but nothing too serious#Which is why it never works#Like itās not that it doesnāt work bc either of us wants a relationship itās more that what we want out of the situationship is different#So lame#Ok this was a lot but I literally came to this epiphany while writing these tags
603 notes
Ā·
View notes
Text
Baldurs gate 3 is very funny in that it brings together a group of people who under most circumstances would consider themselves a found family but just so happens to have populated the group with soley people who would be vehemently against calling it that
#baldurs gate 3#bg3#the tadfools#karlach#wyll ravengard#astarion acunin#gale dekarios#Shadowheart#lae'zel#like ok karlach MAYBE MAYBE depending on how she feels about her dead parents#Astarion probably has that feeling but would never name it because constucting a family is very much wants cazador did#so hed feel really uncomfortable with it in concept#wyll lost cause unlessnyou can get him to recognise that ulder and florrick suck so lost cause#gale has like actual functional family#shart would have that be such a weird long process of synthaisis between the person take from her and the person she is#it would be very weird and messy and she probably wont bother#and Githyanki dont really have family as a concept so Lae'zel wouldn't use that as a frame of reference#i like to think they still kinda are#its the same emotion who just like with a desperate desire to never put that label on it#which fair
201 notes
Ā·
View notes
Text
There's no turning back.
... Is there anyone who'll be able to survive what lies ahead?
#millions knives#trimax#trigun spoilers#knives sure as fuck didn't lmao#ending my sick drawing saga with this one <3 i feel better now thx#yeah i'll give knives the piano piece. fuck you#i do love drawing knives beautiful. i loved doing the detailing on this one tbh it was a ton of fun#now i am less confident in the background but. what can you do :3 what i get for trying not to use red ig#it's so interesting that quote is from elendira too. she really just wanted to watch the world burn. get it girl <3#manga#illustration#artists on tumblr#drawing#my art#comic#fanart#trigun#i've been drawing too much knives for someone who likes other characters way better lmao. listen. im still processing the uhh#my own sibling trauma ok#drawing diablo vash is therapeutic in a similar way tbh lmfao
497 notes
Ā·
View notes
Text
I love it when women hate men. I love it when women are allowed to vent to each other about how horrible and creepy men are. I love it when women form friendships with and prioritize each other over relationships with men(whether they're attracted to them or not). I love it when women put men dni in their bios and on their nude photos and on posts on their blogs. I love it when women refuse to mollycoddle and accommodate entitled male feelings with "but this doesn't mean I hate all men, I know a few men who are great, I love my father/sons/brothers/uncles/male cousins/guy friends" I love it when women complain about men WITHOUT "not all men" being a disclaimer. I love it when women avoid socializing with/refuse to be around/befriend/get close to men because they know men can't be trusted. I love it when women make "kill all men" jokes. I love it when women offer absolutely no concern or care for men's feelings and if their misandry offends men whatsoever because why should we, men are the oppressor class who have raped and killed and abused us and kept us as subjugated as second-class citizens for millennia, they regularly mistreat us and the women in their own marginalized communities still every single day and make this world so much harder and more awful for us to be in, and if we choose to hate them and not spare them any sympathy then so be it, and I don't just mean "men as a class" either, you can be a woman who doesn't want to have anything to do with any man on an individual basis and completely cuts off men from her personal life too and ykw I will love and fucking support you in that because men deserve absolutely NOTHING from us. If they're so tough and strong then they can handle it just like they can handle being lonely. If you are a woman who hates men, ESPECIALLY IF YOU ARE A LESBIAN AND/OR A TRANS WOMAN, then just know that I love you. I love you, I support you, and you are safe here.
#was going to make a post about how much i hate that women aren't allowed to hate their oppressors but i decided to spin it into something#positive instead#this is supposed to be the feminist site that makes reddit mgtow piss their baby diapers so let's go back to despising men and not coddling#their feelings and let's dye our hair blue while we're at it#i am so tired of this new wave of guilt-tripping and gaslighting women who hate men and don't trust or want to be around them#i hate how we're made into villainesses or the problematic ones for not valuing them in our lives or for wanting to guard ourselves or be#safe from our oppressors#and i'm tired of people who don't know the first thing about feminism being like 'BUT THAT'S TERF RHETORIC WHAT ABOUT X MINORITY MEN'#guess what women can also be x minority that you're trying to protect the men of and we get to hate men too#trans women are included when i say women btw and trans men are included when i say men#if anyone has the right to hate men more than anybody else it's trans women esp trans lesbians because they put up with so much shit#from men that even cis women do not and they especially know how vile men are behind closed doors#so#terfs fuck off#radfems fuck off#and if anybody tries to make this post more appeasing to men or 'not all men's this post you are getting blocked and hit with a hammer#feminism#misogyny#sexism#patriarchy#tw men#tw rape#tw abuse#misandry#terfs dni#radfems dni#feminists need to go back to being scary and unpalatable for men none of this 'but some of them are good!' bullshit#men are entitled to nothing from us#and if you try to prove me wrong then you are just proving my point if you have nothing good to say then simply keep scrolling#ok? ok.
482 notes
Ā·
View notes
Text
yāall we r not beating exorsexism and misogyny by calling every transmasc that pisses u off a ātheyfab.ā Idc if they are annoying or have dumbass opinions, literally using someoneās agab as an insult is wrong and treating transmascs as annoying little afabs is deeply misogynistic and transphobic. What happened to just calling people fucking idiots
#trans ppl sound off in the replies I want to hear ur opinions on this respectfully bc like idk it makes me feel crazy#it just makes me rlly deeply uncomfortable to see ppl who generally have fine takes do this shit like cmon yāall we can be better#all saying it tells me is that ur just treating all the transmascs u DO like as exceptions to the rule#idc if ur arguing w the most annoying deeply stupid transmasc in the world itās not their identity that makes them annoying or stupid lol#using someoneās agab derogatorily is so fucking stupid itās ltrlly just one step away from calling them pussy boys or annoying women idfk#.txt#whatās crazy is the most egregious example I saw was some1 literally complaining about exorsexism. by blaming it on afabs. then posting lik#āwhen theyfabs walk in the roomā to some āeeew it stinks in hereā audio on TikTok. saying they had stinky pussies. they were literally afab#hello??? the internalized misogyny is fucking CRAZYYYYY literally yall just regurgitate shit Iāve already heard from cishet men but act lik#itās ok cause itās directed at ātheyfabsā instead of women. Ok
287 notes
Ā·
View notes
Text
it's a pet peeve of mine when ppl frame Andrew as hating Aaron and being needlessly cruel to him... bc while yes, their relationship is fractured and strained, Andrew genuinely cares about his brother and wants the best for him, he just doesn't know how to show that in a normal way.
like he might not know how to express it in a healthy manner but Andrew LOVES Aaron, like he truly just wants Aaron to be healthy and safe. It's like, his whole Thing. Aaron is one of the most important people in his life. Andrew wants him around. He'd do anything to protect him.
I guarantee Andrew wants to be emotionally close to Aaron too, he just doesn't have the tools to do that and the thought of letting someone in terrifies him. He also has no concept of what a healthy sibling relationship looks like, so he has no frame of reference to work from.
#i love bickering twinyards as much as the next guy but sometimes ppl write andrew has if he thinks aaron is a waste of space#and that just isn't true#andrew values his brother#he wouldn't insist on keeping aaron close if he didn't#when ppl do this is just so obvious to me that they're using andrew as a mouthpiece for their own dislike of aaron#and like ok yeah you're entitled to not like a character i guess#but it's just so wildly out of character to me for andrew to treat aaron like shit for no reason beyond Being Cruel#like yeah andrew can be mean when he's feeling defensive or trying to make a point#and yeah he can treat people like shit if he's got a reason to justify it like Keeping People Safe#but he's not needlessly cruel to the people closest to him without cause#like neil says#everything andrew does#he does For A Reason#even neil isn't needlessly mean to aaron tbh#like he doesn't like aaron much at certain points but if he picks a fight with aaron it's never without cause#and he's genuinely happy for aaron when things work out with katelyn in the end#and he wants aaron to have a relationship with andrew as well! like it's important to neil that the twins have a healthy bond!!#anyway im getting off my soapbox now this is just something i was thinking about today a Lot#aftg#all for the game#the foxhole court
513 notes
Ā·
View notes
Text
kacchan really is so funny for being like BUT WHAT ABOUT BAKUDEKU CANON when he finds out izuku is quirkless
#bakudeku#bkdk#mha spoilers#bnha spoilers#mha leaks#he really is like WHAT ABOUT US#WHAT ABOUT EVERYTHING WE BEEN THROUGH#izuku is such a Gabriella too he DO be running away from his feelings every chance he gets#what about US IZUKU WHAT ABOUT OUR MARRIAGE#WHAT IS THE POINT OF THIS MANGA IF WE ARENT MARRIED#and Izuku is like oh no my baby is on too many painkillers hahaha heās not proposing to me right now thatās silly#if he was proposing that would mean he loved me and I canāt accept that reality Iām too much of a burden#I canāt think of myself long enough to realize I am valued#two months ago Izuku was like :) Iām so blessed kacchan talks to me almost normally#how is he supposed to process he was just proposed to by that same boy#like heās also just gone through almost losing him heās probably like Iām lucky heās alive and breathing near me#and kacchanās like I LOVE YOU I WANT YOU FOREVER#Izuku is overwhelmed ok give him some slack
366 notes
Ā·
View notes
Text
Sukunaās Loneliness Part 4 (Sukunaās Negative Rizz)
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3
Some warnings before we start.
1) This analysis deals with sexual topics.
2) I will be mainly using the TCB scans because of their accessibility.Ā Raws are from mangareader(.)to.
3) This was written as of JJK 262 266. (I'm just going to keep updating this until I stop finding things I should've noticed earlier.)
4) The raws broke me in ways you cannot possibly imagine.
(Click images for captions/citations.)
Fighting as Communication
Baki the Grappler. This is a manga where men destroy each otherās bodies as a test of strength. Itās poorly written but the art is terrifying and I love it so dearly. Between fights of extreme violence and body horror the characters eat. And thatās it. Thatās the manga.
I bring Baki up because Gege is a huge fan of Fujimoto Tatsuki, the creator of Chainsawman. Fujimoto is a fan of Gege too, but more importantly, he is a huge fan of Itagaki Keisuke, the creator of Baki. (His daughter made Beastars btw.) In a way, this means Jujutsu Kaisen has been influenced by Baki. But thatās not a surprise, a lot of manga is.
Itagakiās work is so massively influetial on Japanese media that itās kind of hard to grasp since itās not as popular overseas. When listening to interviews from various Japanese creators, Baki will often be cited as a major influence. And the thing is, you can tell when a creative has read Baki. Thereās nothing quite like it. If youāve read Baki and consume Chainsawman, you will see its bones everywhere. I feel the same about Jujutsu Kaisen.
The main antagonist in Baki is Yujiro Hanma. He is the strongest creature alive. So much so that he has no one to call a rival. Heās bored. He causes trouble. He kills his wife to motivate his son, Baki into becoming stronger. His son, Baki, who he grooms into becoming a fighter that might beat him in combat one day. Kind of sounds like Sukuna, right?
But thatās not my point here. My focus is how Baki doubles as a discussion about strength and manhood. Itās aggressively bisexual. Men love each other with their fists. Straight up the main character says having sex with women is the same thing as fighting men.
And it just doesnāt stop there. The homoerotic nature of the fights is never shyed away from. Hereās an example of my favorite.
He grabs his balls and compliments their size. Thatās pretty gay, right? Well thereās this reanimated prehistoric caveman called Pickle that fights Bakiās brother Jack. And how do they fight? They kiss.
I didnāt call it a kiss. Itagaki did. I didnāt say they melded together. Itagaki did. This mangaka overtly calls attention to the homoerotic nature of men fighting men, and how men communicate their love for each other through violence. And yes, itās sexual. Itagaki wants you to read it that way.
But sometimes he doesnāt want you to read it that way. Sometimes the fights are a dialogue, an emotional conversation. Like one between father and son.
Itagaki is a master of narrative framing. When he wants you to feel a certain way, you will feel it. He also tells his readers that thereās more to the fights than just fighting.
Those are the ideas that help me see the bones of Baki in other works. Men loving men with violence. Men communicating with men through violence. I see these ideas in Jujutsu Kaisen too.
Jujutsu Communication
Iāve gone over how Yuji commucates with other people on their own terms. And a lot of it is through fighting. A conversation without words, learning how someone works. Yuji is good at using fights as tool of communication.
But heās not the one who tells you that thereās more to the fights than just fighting. Maki does in her spar with the sumo guy.
Just like Baki. Fighting is a means of communication. Gege has told you that there can be more to the fights than fighting. It's a tool used to understand the self and others.
With that in mind, I want to reexamine a particular fight under the lens of Baki rather than Umineko.
Sukuna vs Gojo
Baki tells you that homoerotic readings of its fights are intentional. If you ask me, this probably stems from historical stances on masculinity and homosexuality in ancient Japan. Men loved men and women differently, but both were ok. Thatās how Baki can have a girlfriend and his gay fights. Peak bisexual optimization.
What does Jujutsu Kaisen have to do with this? Well it has been extremely queer friendly. We have a multidue of canonical trans characters, non-binary characters, and other flavors of queer characters not disparaged for their identities, Gojo Satoru included. It may not be stated outright, but Gojo and Geto do love each other in a gay way. The subtext is so persisent itās basically text.
In other words, Gege has already told us, yes please have queer readings of this text. Itās the same way Baki tells you, yes this is straight up convoluded gay sex. So thatās what Iām going to do. Iām going to reread the Sukuna and Gojo fight as some ridiculous mating display between two men who are fighting over can miscommunicate their intent the hardest.
Framed as Courtship
Letās start with the framing. The pre-fight set up. How does text tell you queer readings are allowed?
Kenjaku does. Itās romantic. Itās a date. This reading has been made valid explicitly. And if thereās room for doubt because of the sarcasm? Thereās still additional support for it.
We already know how badly in love Gojo is with Geto. The fight is on the 24th of December, the most romantic day in Japan. And in a fun little Geto parallel, who declared the start of war on this day, violence underlines this new romantic venture.
That doesnāt include Sukuna who recalls Yorozuās words about teaching love in the context of marriage.
Gojo never heard that conversation which is why the next point is absolutely insane.
The outfit Gojo initially is in resembles that of a groom at a Shinto wedding.
Shinto weddings were implemented after the Heian era. Part of the ceremony includes a priest and a shrine maiden who respectively stand to the right and left of the altar. A purification ritual will occur, lead by the priest, to cleanse the shrine before vows are exchanged. Gakuganji is the priest and Utahime is the shrine maiden. To the right and left of Gojo respectively.
The bride at a Shinto wedding wears mainly white. After the 200% Hollow Purple cleanses the area, the dark shawl is removed and Sukuna remains in mostly white.
How interesting that this battle has been framed as one between groom and bride.
The thing is, marriage in the Heian era was far more lax. There were no major ceremonies. If a man was interested in marrying a woman, he would visit her for 3 nights after receiving approval from her father. Upon the passing of their 3rd night together, the family would have an informal celebration of their union in private. Even after marriage, multiple partners were allowed and sometimes encouraged.
Yorozuās big celebration proposal to Sukuna and banning of concubines was quite improper by Heian standards. Though it is in line with modern marriages. If Sukuna did not consume any Shinto wedding literature, he probably didnāt recognize that Gojo was dressed as a groom.
But did Gojo dress this way for Sukuna intentionally? The Toji fit served an entirely different purpose. Itās the robes and pre-fight ceremony that catch my attention. So I propose the following:
1) Gojo dressed up as a groom to die and be wed with his one and only Geto in death.
2) Gojo dressed up as a groom in part as an offering to Sukuna. And because Sukuna is from the Heian era it went over his head entirely.
3) Gojo intended for both of these things at the same time and left who he would end up with to fate.
Regardless of what Gojo was going for here, itās a visual cue combined with the knowledge of it being Dec 24th that encourages the reader to perhaps consider the fight as something other than just a fight. A date perhaps? Kenjaku made the connection and neither Gojo or Sukuna really denied it. Gojo gave the weak excuse of a death anniversary confusion. But much weirder, given how hostile he was to Yorozu, Sukuna did not object to the romantic framing in any capacity.
Am I reaching? Is this reading intentional?
When I start getting this confused by how a translated work wants me to read it, I try to refer to the original language text and anyone who knows it for missing context. Sometimes localizations add things that werenāt there or push readers towards one interpretation. So for the rest of this analysis, Iām going to be focusing on the raws.
Iām going to be honest. My Japanese fudging sucks. I can barely read kanji and canāt reliably translate anything. Feel free to correct me if I got something wrong. That being said, with what little I do know, I have discovered something interesting.
In this post I talked about how weird Sukunaās manner of speech is. I focused on his you pronoun usage of ćå (Omae) for everyone else and č²“ę§ (Kisama) for Gojo since this is a strong indicator of how a character views their relationship to someone.
Here's a summary of the two points I made in that post:
1) Omae is informal and either a casual thing amongst peers or indicates the speaker's higher status. Since Sukuna is arrogant, we can reasonably assume he's talking down to people.
2) Kisama historically was a formal show of respect, but in modern times it is a hostile insult, much more rude than Omae. Since Sukuna is 1,000 years old and hates Yuji (who he uses Omae with), we can reasonably assume Sukuna was being friendly to Gojo when he used Kisama.
With that pronoun usage in mind, while examining the raws for the infamous āYou Cleared My Skiesā speech I found this:
Kisama. Sukuna is very happy and lavishing Gojo with praise. The assumption it was formal from the start seems to be correct. It's hard to read this any other way.
Though Japanese can easily be dubious in its interpretation, there are instances where context can cut off all other readings. I truly believe this one of those cases.
Now, to confirm Sukuna is still only treating Gojo this way I started looking at his you pronouns as he got excited post-Gojo death. Maki is the person he seems to admire the most.
Heās still just using Omae. What does that mean? Gojo is in his own fudging category for Sukuna and he has been there since the start of the manga. (For more on why this is significant, refer to this post.)
Wow ok. Thatās pretty intense! Weāve got Gojo dressed up as a groom on December 24th and Sukuna treating Gojo different from anyone else. I read their fight again under the lens of explicit courtship and focused in on these specific panels.
Satisfaction. Now thatās a word that can easily carry a sexual connotation. Love as well. The parallel syntax fascinated me in English. So I decided to look at the raws and see how close they are.
Pretty much the same except for "the one who will teach you love" and "the one satisfying him now". Since the one being satisfied is Gojo by Sukuna, it really seems we can assume the one being taught love is Gojo by Sukuna.
Time to learn some Japanese again!
Kanji has multiple readings. Most have at least two. The Onyomi (Chinese) reading typically used for nouns and the Kunyomi (Japanese) reading typically used for verbs. (This is not always the case but itās the basics.)
Thatās probably why ęŗ is read as ć¾ć (man) when Gojo and Geto are talking about āsatisfactionā using the On version and ćæ (mi), the Kun version, when the narrator is talking about who āsatisfiesā who.
However ęŗ on its own does not mean satisfaction. It means full. To be filled. Or fullness. č¶³ (zoku) is added as a modifier after ęŗ to be read as satisfaction ęŗč¶³ (manzoku). č¶³ usually means feet, but it can also mean to be sufficient. Manzoku therefore has a direct translation of being sufficiently full. Itās not a surprise a lot of food places in Japan use Manzoku in their names or advertising.
But whatās this? Why is this sentence written as ęŗććć¦ or Mi(tashite) instead of ęŗč¶³ćć¦ or Manzoku(shite)? The addition of Zoku is what transforms Man into "satisfying". Without the Zoku, itās just "fill". The means this sentence can be read as āThe one filling him up now isāā
Weāve already established that the blank is Sukuna. The new problem is that heās filling Gojo up. And boy, does that sound homoerotic to put it lightly. But perhaps I am reaching.
So I did what any sane person would do in this situation. I read hentai.
Surely if the phrase ęŗććć¦ (mitashite) can carry a sexual connotation I will find it in hentai.
...
I immediately found a yaoi doujin called Fill me with your Big Love aka ćć£ććŖęć§ęŗććć¦ (Okkina Ai de Mitashite). Honestly, I found too many doujins about creampies specifically. (You have internet access verify this yourself.) When you search Manzokushite the results are much more in line with life satisfaction than sexual satisfaction. ...So Gege decided to use the more frisky phrasing.
Manzoku is also the name of an active sex toy manufacturer (Iām not linking them use a search engine.) and a discontinued adult entertainment news company. So the satisfaction Gojo and Geto talk about, along with Geto using 妬 (ya), the jealous kanji often used between lovers, is definitely probably carrying a sexual connotation too.
So, Iām not reaching. What the fudge did Gege mean by this?
Now that we've established that I am NOT reaching. What do we do with this information?
Well, we ruminate on the fight with the knowledge that Sukuna, of his own volition, decided to get Gojo off, probably.
I have forgiven Nanami for calling Gojo a pervert. If I watched someone bust a nut after being cut in half by his sworn enemy instead of saving the country, I too would be like what the fudge.
Anyways, the typical phrase used for an orgasm in Japanese is č”ć(iku). It translates as to go. And yes it can mean to die, as in going to the other side. To die and go to heaven if you will. Which is what Gojo did with a big old smile on his face.
Thereās also the term åæ天 (tokoroten). It refers to a dish were a semi-opaque white substance is pushed through holes to create noodles. Literal translation using the kanji for heart åæ (kokoro) and the kanji for heaven 天 (ten). (Donāt ask me why them being smack together turns the Koroko into Tokoro. I donāt know.) Which in slang refers to prostate orgasms. This has nothing to do with this analysis I wanted to drop this fun fact in here. ā¦And this image of Sukuna clutching his heart while looking at someone he sent to heaven.
(This is a reach but the idea of this being an elaborate gay pun amuses me greatly.)
I have another fun slang term: č³¢č
ćæć¤ć (kenjataimu) which directly translates to sage č³¢č
(kenja) time ćæć¤ć (taimu). This refers to post-nut clarity sending someone into a meditative-like state.
Oh thatās a bit familiar. Sukuna was giving sagely advice to Kashimo and reflecting on satisfaction and love.
And whatās this? Mitashite has made a reappearance! Sukuna is saying āIāve never thought about needing another person to fill me up.ā Which 1. further supports the 'The one satisfying/filling him (Gojo) now isāSukuna.' reading and 2. suggests Sukuna is a top suggests Sukuna really doesnāt have sexual interest in people. (Since the context of this convo is relationships and love.)
By the way. Acts of eating in Japanese can be modified to carry sexual meanings. Itās a bit more suggestive than English, but it carries over pretty well I think? čé£ē³» (nikusokukei) refers to someone who aggresively pursues romantic or sexual relationships. Composed of the kanji č (niku) for meat, é£ (ta) for eating, and ē³» (kei) class. If you noticed, é£ isnāt usually read as Soku. It becomes Soku when paired with Niku for some reason. (I donāt know why someone please help me.) Side by side the kanji čé£ (nikusoku) means meat-eater.
é£ is still interesting on itās own. The é£ć¹ć (taberu) reading is normal eating. The é£ć(kuu) reading is an innuendo. It can mean to devour someone, like a cannibal, or devour someone sexually.
Sukuna has made it very clear that his eating of people is literal. Thereās no innuendo. In fact, if you read into it, heāll kill you (rip Yorozu and Kashimo).
Gojo, however, appears to be his sole exception to this rule. When Sukuna tells Kashimo not to spoil his pleasure he uses the kanji č (kyou). This of course can be directly translated as pleasure, but the Chinese reading of it can also indicate intense excitement or sexual arousal.
Sukuna is pretty good at double-entendre wordplay if his earlier stunts with the kanji for Enchain doubling as Megumi Activities if read a different way is anything to go by. He's a fan of Chinese literature. It's not a stretch to assume there's more going on here.
And if notoriously homophobic Reddit dudebros are posting things like this. Maybe there's a lot more merit to this reading than I can currently grasp.
Iām still pretty convinced Sukuna is aroace. That of course doesnāt bar him from pursuing romantic or sexual relationships. Sometimes thereās the one exception. Sometimes the desire to be with and please an allo partner allows for engagement of activities they arenāt into. Sometimes the actions are pursued without the emotional attachment because they physically feel good. Thereās also the gray-scale and demi labels to consider.
With that in mind, I want to emphasize this all points to how important Gojo is to Sukuna regardless of sexuality. He tried to engage with and understand Gojo on terms he wonāt for anyone else. And heās been pursuing this connection relentlessly since the start of manga.
Sukunaās Negative Rizz
Ok I established that reading the Sukuna vs Gojo fight as unhinged courtship is supported by the text. That doesnāt really say anything about Sukuna sucking at it.
But, my dear reader, that in of itself is proof of his negative rizz. I had to sit down. Learn about Heian era and Shinto wedding rituals, learn more Japanese, splice seemingly unrelated manga panels together, read hentai, and know that Gege is into yaoi to come to this conclusion. I had to rip every little shred of characterization and context apart and rearrange it into something comprehensible.
You know who canāt do that? Gojo.
As far as Gojo is concerned, Sukuna hates him. Kisama is an extremely hostile you pronoun in modern times. And if Gojo canāt tell Shoko (his closest friend after Geto) is stressed over him being used like a meat puppet by her visibly falling back on her addiction, heās going to default to the assumption Sukuna hates him just as much as everyone else.
And Gojo does just that. He assumes he failed to reach Sukuna. Despite how often they did hand to hand combat and weaponized their knowledge of each other, Gojo believes they never had proper conversation through fighting. He dies not understanding Sukuna, convinced the other was not trying to communicate with him at all.
And if you recall, all of this fight occurred while Sukuna was wearing Megumiās face. That boy is pretty much Gojoās adopted child. From my experience, most single parents do not go looking for clones of their kids as partners.
If someone wore the skin of my family member I would assume they were trying to torment me. And torment Gojo Sukuna does. He draws attention to Megumiās soul being used as collateral and attacks him with the 10 Shadows. We as the audience know this is all for the sake of getting past Infinity using his Shrine. Gojo doesnāt know that. Heās fighting an evil dude who is puppeting the body of his son for god knows what reason.
Seriously, Sukuna sucks at communicating intent.
In Part 3 of my examination of Sukunaās loneliness, I said Dismantle is a tool Sukuna uses to understand. And that him upgrading it by making Gojo the center of his world was indicative of his desire to reach him. I also said his refusal to use it on Yorozu was him expressing how little interest he had in her.
Yorozu is pissed by this. She sees it as Sukuna rejecting her and I donāt think sheās wrong. Sukuna saved his special Cursed Technique (CT) for Gojo while turning Yorozu down. If weāre considering all the wedding imagery and references that started with Yorozu, Iām certainly allowed to read that as him saving himself for Gojo. (Think of how he lied to Gojo about being the first one he killed.)
Thereās also the fact that Yorozu saw their battle as an expression love and lustāthat the usage of CT is a type of foreplay under certain circumstances since it is an extension of the self. Combine that with the established premise that fighting is a type of a communication thanks to Maki vs Sumo Guy and you can start to see the courtship logic behind Sukunaās treatment of Gojo.
If we are to read āThe one who will teach you love isā¦Sukunaā thereās another adorable caveat. Yorozu uses the you pronoun ććŖć (Anata) for Sukuna.
Itās an informal you pronoun used by people learning Japanese. Native speakers try to avoid using it as it can come across as rude. But in the context of love? This is colloquially called the wife pronoun as its often used by a wife to her husband.
If you wanted to localize its usage in the way Yorozu means it, Anata might become āyou, dearā. So here we have Sukuna dressed in white, like a bride to Gojoās groom, thinking of him as Anata.
The problem is, Gojo doesnāt know that. Sukuna never bothered to open his mouth and say this was an act of love. Sure he told Kashimo in the most roundabout way possible, but Gojo was the one who needed to hear that. If a courtship is going to be this diabolically complicated, there has to be clear hints for the other party. JJK is not Umineko where thereās a witch that can revive the dead over and over until the idiot finally understands this was all for them.
Gojo also doesnāt have access to the kanji Sukuna uses to describe certain techinques or words. He hears the phonetics and runs with whatever best fits the context. This means thereās no way for him to catch the double-meaning unless heās a certain type of lingust, which he is not. His manner of speech and personal interests donāt line up with the flowery language of the Heian Era. The types of written works Gojo is into are historical war politics from the Sengoku period (known for violence more than the fine arts), Shonen manga, and physics/math.
And what's this? According to CFYOW (the canon light novels): JJK Thorny Road at Dawn, Chapter 3 Asakusabashi Elegy, Gojo doesn't even like ancient poetry. You know, the thing Sukuna enjoys and tries to communicate with.
The Kokin Wakashu Gojo off-handedly disparages is a compilation of Hiean Era poetry known as Waka. This was the primary means of communication amongst the noble class and spiritual leaders at the time. And the thing is, this poetry is supposed to be read into. Down to the quality of stroke and paper, not just the kanji written. Especially for courtship.
Itās not that Gojo is stupid. He just doesnāt specialize in the studies that would give him a more critical ear to Sukuna's words. And Sukuna doesnāt seem to understand that no one in the modern era communicates like this anymore.
If you didnāt know, this is why Japanese characters introduce themselves they often describe what kanji their name is spelled with. Take for example: Satoru. He uses the kanji ę meaning enlightenment. This kanji can be read as Go instead of Satoru. Additionally, the name Satoru can be written in kanji as č” for smart, ęŗ for wisdom, ē„ for knowledge, äŗ for understanding, å² for philosophy, č for virtuous, or ę for daybreak. Thatās 8 different kanji possible if you hear the name Satoru.
This is why Sukunaās wordplay for everything else can be easily missed by other characters. They hear the words and cannot read the kanji like us. Context decides what Sukuna means for them. And since Sukunaās context for most is violence and insults, itās very hard for them to think about his words in any other way.
And boy howdy does Gojo miss it. Sukuna straight up calls him his husband and it took me several rereads to catch it. While mocking Gojo for being unable to open his domain, Sukuna calls him "painfully ordinary". This is localized from the word å”夫 (bonpu) which can also be translated as unenlightened. (A layered insult! Sukuna is pretty much saying Gojo's sorcery is so boring he shouldn't even call himself the Honored One.)
The thing is...Bonpu is comprised of the 2 kanji å” for mediocre, and 夫 for husband. (Please note that there are many other ways to call Gojo a ditz without using the kanji for husband.) And an update from the Replies: Turns out there's layers to the gayness too.
It's come full fudging circle. Gojo came dressed as a groom for a wedding and Sukuna thinks they're already married. The miscommunication is off the rails.
But wait! There's more...
Earlier I mentioned that the kanji for Enchain doubles as Megumi Activities. Let's break that down more. (Unfortunately the Twitter account of the person I referenced may or may not be nuked so here's this screenshot I've doctored.)
So we have the translation of Enchain from å„é (Keikatsu), which might be better localized as Separation.
This term comes from a Chinese poem about lovers who are husband and wife in The Book of Odes, Section I (Lessons from the States), Chapter 3 (The Odes of Bei), Poem 31 (Banging the Drum). (Here's a link to the full poem and context of it.)
In summary, itās about a soldier who is on the brink of death, having lost nearly everything after being abandoned by those in power, lamenting the happiest days of his life with his love are ones he can never get back. (Hey that sounds just like what Sukuna did to Yuji!)
Keikatsu specifically comes from this passage:
āOur vow is beyond death and lifeā, I and you are together I always remembered. I will hold your hand, And together we grow old.
Too pitiful we are faraway apart, The distance separates us to meet again! Too miserable this takes forever, And it does not let us fulfill our vow!
Keikatsu is used to exemplify how the physical distance between the husband and wife prevents them from fulfilling their wedding vows. And that's just what Keikatsu/Enchain does to Yuji and Megumi, it causes painful separation neither of them wanted.
Keikatsu also tells Yuji exactly how Sukuna plans to do it. å„(kei)é(katsu) can be written as ęµ(kei)ę“»(katsu). The kanji ęµ can be read as Kei or...Megumi. (It's the literal kanji used for his name.) The kanji ę“» (katsu) can mean "activities", which is how we get Enchain=Megumi Activities.
A two for one special! Sukuna mocks Yuji for being so close with Megumi while telling him exactly how he's going to destroy their relationship.
It seems this has nothing to do with Gojo until you consider the 3rd possible reading from wordplay with å„é (Keikatsu). The kanji å„ when read as Kei refers to a promise, pledge or vow. When å„ read as Chigi? It can refer to sexual intercourse, especially between husband and wife.
So we have å„é(keikatsu, separation), ęµ(kei Megumi)ę“»(katsu, activities), and å„(kei chigi, spousal sex)ę“»(katsu, activities). It's no wonder he erased Yuji's memory of it.
Keep in mind, that when Sukuna uses Keikatsu, the only vow that he has made at this point is his promise to kill Gojo. He eventually does that using Megumi's body during a fight framed between groom and bride. And for reasons beyond their control, Sukuna and Gojo have been unable to fulfill that vow through lengthy separation.
Notes from poem "Banging the Drum" Sukuna references include the following:
"And during the operation, he lost his horse, which was a desperate situation (horses in ancient time carried soldier supply and weapons, are life companion for soldiers in advance or retreat), he lost his horse, his supply, maybe his armor and weapons, and the road he was facing that we may lose his life so he may never go back. In all these mess, he started searching, and somehow at this hopeless moment he started to revisit his happiest moment, when he together vowed in marriage ceremony with his wife, and he was even afraid that he might never see his love again."
"And His last statement for his true value is his home, his love, his fulfillment of his vow is his true duty. Hero's duty is to pursue love."
In Buddhism, which JJK is heavily influenced by, horses are a pretty big deal. Horses can represent the path to enlightenment, especially since The Buddha's horse is what takes him on this journey away from his wife and children. They separate in the end though, the horse dying of a broken heart.
Remember how Sukuna called Gojo unenlightened? He sort of guided Gojo to enlightenment using Mahoraga, whose Eight-Handed title is a reference to the Eightfold Path to be followed for enlightenment. Buddhist enlightenment is centered around liberation from suffering. (Just check the wiki entry to verify this.) Infinity was the source of Gojo's suffering and Sukuna cut right through it.
Sukuna has been running around with a broken heart for a good chunk of the post-Gojo fight. And if you take that into consideration with this poem and all the other symbolism, he's somehow a Buddha, a Bodhisattva, the dying husband, the widowed wife, and the heartbroken horse all at the same time. Not unlike his wordplay taking on every possible meaning at once.
But my point here is that Sukuna mightāve seen his fight with Gojo as consummation of their marriage. (There's probably a joke in here about the husband reaching climax while leaving his wife unsatisfied.) Remember in the wise words of Itagaki Keisuke, "Fighting and sex are exactly the same!"
In Conclusion?
This is possibly one of the most bizarre and elaborate expressions of love I have lost my mind over. Sukuna gave everything Gojo ever wanted from Jujutsu violently. He did it in such an unpleasant and cruel way that the target of his affection thought there was nothing between them. Sukuna also hid his intent under social norms that no longer exist. Unless Gojo happened to be into ancient literature, there was never a scenario where he would catch onto this. Sukuna's failure is critical on multiple levels.
Itās impressive. It really is. No one knows how Sukunaās strange little brain works so heās stuck being loner without anyone that fully understands him. (Iām still thinking about how Uraume didnāt know Sukuna was a twin for over 1,000 years.) Heād have to let people in and tell him outright, but heās just like Gojo so I guess thatās never happening.
#cactus yaps#I need to have my weeaboo license revoked.#How on earth did I miss this?#GEGE WHAT DID YOU MEAN BY THIS.#Hi yes I will dress as a traditional groom on Dec 24th the most romantic day in Japan after someone else called the arrangement a date.#Is this even subtext at this point?#Why canāt these men use their got danged words instead of Umineko levels of psychological warfare.#Sukuna: ''Gojo is clearly driven by lust. How do I have s*x with him without actually having s*x?#Fighting and death are basically the same thing as s*x so Iāll do that and hopefully he sees that I love him.''#Gojo to Geto: ''Sukuna gave me the best *rgasm I've had in years. I think he hates me.''#Geto: ''Huh.''#Absolutely fascinated by girlfailures Sukuna and Geto horribly fumbling Gojo in completely different ways.#I want them to fight over him in the most passive aggressive way possible.#Gojo was meant to be a romcom harem protagonist.#Though Sukuna should be way more ok with poly given Heian rules on relationships.#But you know Geto was also ok that someone else was able to make Gojo feel good.#I like that prioritization of his pleasure. Even if it came a little too late.#Much to think about.#Consider this my Sukugo manifesto part 2.#Update 8/14/24: One of these days I'm just going to have to make a new post.#Update Cont: Sukuna calling Gojo his mid unenlightened husband wife spouse all at once using two kanji is truly insane.#Update 8/19/2024: All according to Keikatsu.#sukugo#ryomen sukuna#gojo satoru#jjk spoilers#jujutsu kaisen#lemons
238 notes
Ā·
View notes
Text
hey come here
reblog your own work. reblog it as much as you want. the dashboard is chronological (mostly) so you gotta put it back out there!! ok bye
#ooc#i'm serious though!!!!!#Make a tag if you're concerned about 'spamming'#i use āSRBā and I know a lot of people do! short for self reblog#use your queue and schedule post features#(Queue is just 1 button press and it goes into a queue of other posts that will auto post x amount of posts between a time period)#(If you got into your 'queue' on your dashboard you can change these settings. A queue can hold 1000 posts)#(Schedule posting means you pick the exact date/time it will be posted#then it will be filtered into your queue for that time)#if you don't want to on a whim reblog your work I highly recommend scheduling your post to reblog a few hours/days/weeks/months from now#or if you already have a big queue just toss her in there when you post and be pleasantly surprised when it gets spat out again#but don't feel shame or embarassed !!!#you worked hard on the things you share and the deserve to be seen#sometimes that means a little more work (pushing buttons)#and thats ok!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#ok now for real bye love you
154 notes
Ā·
View notes