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drchucktingle · 2 years ago

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my masks

hey there buckaroos. due to all of the attention the TEXAS LIBRARY ASSOCIATION situation has gotten i am going to take a minute to talk about my personal way as an autistic buckaroo. im going to tell you about my masks.

im doing this for a few reasons, some are good FUN reasons full of love and some are not so great.

lets start with the GOOD STUFF. first of all, i am talking about this because speaking on my way can help other buckaroo feel more comfortable speaking on there own way, ESPECIALLY if they are good at ‘passing’ for neurotypical like chuck is.

unfortunately the NOT SO GREAT reasons im talking about all this dang stuff are two fold. reason one: i have been put into a position of having to explain and justify my needs and boundaries by the TXLA. this is not something that i WANT to be taking up all of my time, but when large organizations do not make space for those who they have pledged to support, it puts us smaller buckaroos into position where were have to defend our existence. it is not plesent but it is necessary.

the second NOT SO GREAT reason is that ‘passing’ bisexual and autistic people like myself are ALWAYS just seconds from being gatekept from folks both outside and inside these communities. there will probably be a day on chucks deathbed where i take off my mask and say hello to this timeline (mostly so you can all see how handsome i am under here but I DIGRESS). i KNOW with absolute certainty (the same way other bi and autistic buckaroos are probably nodding along right now) that when that day comes i will STILL be accused of ‘not being real’ and ‘faking’ because i ‘dont look autistic’ and i have a beautiful ladybuck partner in sweet barbara.

ALL THAT IS TO SAY, i am taking a moment today to talk FOR THE RECORD about my neurodigence and my particular needs. hopefully i will not have to keep diving this deep every time an organization takes a discrimantory action against me, but i will also say this: at least it is a good fight on an important battlefield

anyway buds, here is the story of my way on the spectrum

when i was a young buckaroo i knew that my thought process was different. i could socialize easily, which is unique in contrast to many autistic buds (it is a spectrum after all), but my social ease was for an interesting reason. I ALWAYS KNEW WHAT OTHERS WERE ABOUT TO SAY. it was like a strange ‘human game’ where someone would say one thing and i would think ‘well you actually mean something else’ in a sort of logical way (this is why i later related to DATA from star trek so dang much). at first i remember thinking ‘well i am just NOT going to play along with this human game’. i quickly learned neurotypical buckaroos do not like this, that there is a BOB AND WEAVE to social interactions that must be learned.

later i realized ‘actually if i WANT to make friends and prove love is real then i can do this like an expert because i can SEE the game where most cant’. this got chuck many buds and took me on many adventures. please understand, i am not saying these connections are not important to me, they are just different. they are full of love, but i express this in my own unique way.

HOWEVER, while growing up i felt disconnected from this timeline in other ways, like an alien or a reverse twin trotting along in a world that is not quite my own. i did not feel emotions the same way my buds did. they would get upset over the ‘human game’ interactions and i would not be moved at all, HOWEVER i could see the way sunlight hit a window and start crying my dang eyes out over the beauty. so my emotion was still there and VERY STRONG, i just felt it in more existential ways (like hearing the call of the lonesome train). these days that feeling has progressed to where i am pretty much in a constant blissed out state of cosmic emotional connection (make of that last sentence what you will, but it is the truth). when i make existential posts online i am not just FIRING OFF SOME CONTENT, i really mean every word. this is really my trot.

anyway as a young buckaroo these feelings made me worry sometimes. i thought about various mental health dianosises and marked the parts and pieces that matched with myself. am i this? am i that? sometimes, instead of just being’ different’ i worried i might actually be ‘wrong’.

when i saw david byrne on letterman in my younger days i immediately recognized something connected to myself. i thought ‘wow this is the mystery being solved before my very eyes.’ i could hear it in the music of talking heads too. i started doing research and realized that i might be on autism spectrum, something that was later confirmed by a therapist (back then the diagnosis was called asperger's). it was a glorious and fulfilling moment. i was SO EXCITED TO BE AUTISTIC LIKE MY HERO. i felt very cool because of it, and i still feel very cool because of it.

one of the big reasons i talk so much about being autistic these days is because i want to make sure OTHER buckaroos can have that same moment that i did. they can see chuck and think ‘wow i really like this autistic artist, maybe being autistic is cool’

so what does an average day WITHOUT wearing the pink bag look like for me?

my thought process is exactly like ROSE from CAMP DAMASCUS, which is part of why i wrote the book. we have the same stim (complex order of finger taps), we prepare for social interactions the same way, we analyze things in the same logical trot that neurotypical people might think feels ‘detached’ but for me feels natural (certain reviews of camp damascus are very funny to me in this way. you can tell when a reader is just very confused by existing in an autistic brain for 250 pages.)

from the outside you would not be able to tell that i am on the spectrum. in fact you would probably find me very socially adept.

the problem is, all of that masking can take its toll. i spent years trotting in and out the emergency room, talking to confused doctors who could not figure out the chronic phantom tension and pain that radiated through my body. i eventually accepted the fact that i would either live a life constantly on heavy painkillers or just stop living altogether.

eventually, however, i started noticing a correlation between the way that i felt, and the space that i allowed for chuck and the pink mask. i was exercising that tension, allowing my mental mask of neurotypical existence to take a rest. i started practicing physical therapy and this time THE RESULTS STUCK because i was approaching from two sides, MIND AND BODY. after a while, i got my pain down to about 5 percent of what it once was. i still have flare ups in times of stress, but the healing has been very real and life changing.

lets get VERY specific now. if i attended the TXLA confrence without a mask and gave my talk i can tell you this: i would do a dang good job. i can work the heck out of a crowd and (not to reveal too much about my secret way) I HAVE BEEN KNOWN TO DO THIS ON OCCASION VERY WELL. however, going home from this event i would very likely be in pain. i would likely need to do physical therapy. i would likely need to stim for a while. i would NOT be emotionally fullfilled in the same way. in other words, without my pink mask i can charm the heck out of buckaroos, but THE SPACE OF CHUCK TINGLE IS NOT THE SPACE FOR THAT. the pink bag is a place for me to not have to put up with that tension. it is a place for me to unmask mentally by masking physically.

this pink bag space SAVED MY LIFE and i am not going to risk blurring these lines. if and when that ever happens it will be MY decision, not someone elses. that is my boundary. the part of me that neurotypically masks could handle a library conference in a purely technical sense, but the part of me that chuck represents absolutely cannot and should not be asked to do that without the pink bag. unfortunately, the complexity of this point makes it even MORE difficult for me to think about and takes up even more of my time, because it forces me to START QUESTIONING MYSELF and my own needs. to be honest, that is the most insidious part of other people questioning your identify and refusing to accept your accommodation needs without ‘proof’.

the thing is, while all of this discussion of disability and accessibility is important, i have a much larger point to make by writing these words.

a conference should not uninvite someone with an unusual physical presentation or a strange way of speaking REGARDLESS of it being classified as a disability. it does not matter WHY i look the way that i look and wear what i wear. i should not have to spend all day writing this post instead of writing my next book, just because my sensibilities are unique and my presentation is unusual.

fortunately the solution is very simple: let other people be themselves. its not hurting you to simply accept and nod at the buckaroos you think look strange. let us exist

#actually autistic #chuck tingle #tingleverse #buckaroo lifestyle

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bimbosandbubbles · 1 year ago

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All Consuming

Starring Yandere Siren Gojo and Geto

Synopsis- Two months ago you became a sole survivor to a supposed animal attack on a lake trip and because of that you’ve become alienated from everyone else in your much too rural community. However,you’re finally not so alone when two mysterious men are way too interested in you…But something’s a little off about them..

Fic for my Summertime Slashers event!

Warnings-mates,Geto and Gojo kinda have a feeding kink in this(they like seeing you eat bcs they only eat human flesh and obviously you don’t 😭), stalking,cum marking(you’ll find out), voyeurism,mirror kink,mutual masturbation,biting,oviposition,icky flirting(they’re very confused on the fact that humans don’t just mate like sirens do), dubcon,borderline noncon,multiple sex scenes,leg worshipping?,manipulation(you’re very vulnerable in this and they take advantage of that),abuse of super natural power(not clearly stated but implied),panty sniffing,lots of breeding kink,and ofc and always CHUBBY READER!

An explanation on sirens and how I tweaked them from traditional folklore! Just so you can have more understanding on why things happen in this fic! So Sirens typically are beings that lure men in with their beautiful voice and then capture them with their magical touch! This is kinda like that but not really! Geto and Gojo are male sirens so they usually target the opposite sex! Their siren voice isn’t necessarily singing it’s just something they can activate in this fic! Also they can go on and off land if they’re well fed! In this fic I imply heavily that sirens take mates like many other sea life!

WC-6.9K/6,925

"Can you give a description of him?"

"Them." Is all you can answer. Seething hot acid pulls at the back of your throat,begging to come out on the steel table. Your quaking hands grip the very edge of the table for some kind of support—a sense of grounding in this situation.

"Right,them. My apologies. The descriptions though,(Reader)?" You gulp,"Well one was taller than the other had these piercing blue eyes,almost like light itself. The other had these soulless black ones...emotionless and empty kinda."

In front of you there's this quiet man presumingly sketching away the description. "Anything else?" You bite your lip and glance down at your scarred fingers but you quickly look away because the memory of just why those injuries remain are there is much too fresh. "I don't know...everything was a blur. I can't remember a thing other than seeing them..."You swallow a thick wad of spit before you utter another word,"tear into my friends."

The officer in front of you stares into your glassy eyes that you bet are red and bulging to the point it looks like you've been choked instead of crying. He sighs,"Look,(Reader) you seem to be a nice enough girl but these details are just not enough to drive this case. This is the third time we've invited you down to the station and you've said nothing to make us believe two men did this to your friends."

"Please! I saw them! I really,really did! I swear! I wouldn't lie about seeing those—those monsters!" The officer sighs and ounces the bridge of his nose,"Let's be real,when the attacked happened you were intoxicated,right? You were out having fun with your girlfriends and probably doing other substances. Or maybe the shock of seeing your friends mauled by an animal got to you. Whatever the case may be I know it's not two human men who ate your friends in front of you."

You clench your fists in pure disgust at the audacity this person has in front of you. He's not the one who had to see it,he's not the one who had to watch your friends cry and beg for help and couldn't do anything about it, and he's certainly not the one who had to live through their constant cries of pain. You finally raise your voice an octave,"I know what I saw and I won't suffer through some accusations pushed onto me because this story isn't believable enough for you!"

The officer doesn't take lightly to your shouting and doesn't remain so calm with his doubt. "I'm tired of listening to your bullshit anyways! There is no man eating monster with glowing blue eyes! And there definitely isn't another soulless black eyed creep!" He takes a deep breath and stands from the metal chair. You sit there in silence fighting back tears and you have no clue why the liquid is fleeing your eye ducts.

It's probably anger or sadness,or both whatever the reason might be you curl up into yourself and sob in front of the two cops. "(Reader), I apologize...but I can't take this case serious. I know you're hurting,losing your friends in an animal caused massacre but you're wasting resources and precious time for cases that actually need to be solved. So just go home and get some therapy,yeah?"

Through teary eyes you gaze at the officer in his harsh eyes and you're left wondering why does no one believe you? It's been two months since the attack and you're doing all the right things;therapy,self groups,going back to normal life,yet you're treated like some crazy person. You've never been the type to lie. Never been the type to abuse someone's trust,so why?

Why are you so unbelievable? Are your tears not mournful enough? Is your slowly deteriorating appearance not evidence enough? Is the scars on your body just too artificial looking for people not to believe the truth?

With your head hung low you whisper,"Sorry officer,I'll go home."

▂▂▂▂

"Oh my god is that her?" The whisper flows through the dining hall. Another answers,"I think she's totally crazy." Then another,"Oh be nice,her friends got mauled by some kind of wolf in front of her." "I heard it was a bear actually."

You chew on your mediocre sandwich trying to ignore the constant voices mumbling about you. It's the first week you've been back at uni since the attack and it's not going so well for you. People only pity you or look down at you for not just dying with your friends. Some people think that you're even responsible for their deaths. But it won't be much longer until you're free of the university gossip due to the fact that summer break is nearly two weeks away. And even with that time frame people are already leaving the dorms entirely.

And what makes it so unfortunate is that no one's in your corner anymore. Your parents have turned their backs on you because it's like a sin to have a child struggling with their mental health in this godforsaken small town. And your friends well...gone because of that very event. And you can't even dream about making any new ones because now you're looked at like some disease instead of a victim of a horrifying crime.

But it's okay,that's what you tell yourself. And that's the mantra that keeps flowing through your brain as you take bite after bite into your too cold food. You people watch from the wooden eating area—turning green with envy as you glance from after people enjoying each other's company.

That was once you, eating and laughing among your beloved closest companions. You don't wish to be bitter for others happiness but it's hard not to when you're actively being shunned by your whole town basically.

You glance down at your depressing looking tray of food and decide it doesn't even look edible to you anymore. You debate whether or not you should throw it away or just eat it. Simply because you haven't been eating much since the incident. You nimble on your lip and decide you shouldn't force yourself to eat food you don't even like.

You arise from your seat and wish you didn't because now all eyes are on you as if they weren't before. You sigh and walk all the way to trash trying to power through all the chatter and seething stares. They all look at you like some parasite slowly infecting them with your presence alone.

Sure,you've been stared at before being that you're a bigger girl in a hick town but this is something different. Something crueler...and more hurtful. It's so hurtful that you're just probably going to skip all your lectures and run away into the comfort of your home.

However your mind sets that aside once you see two strangers sitting at your once empty table. Your brows raises as you walk confusedly back to the table to retrieve your book bag.

Once you come closer you're shocked to be met with eyes black as the night...eyes that are so eerily familiar. "Oh I'm sorry we didn't know anyone was sitting here!" His voice is calm and gentle,gentle to the point that you'd melt into the his arms right now because the longing for comfort roughly tugs at you. Pathetic,anyone would agree to that,however you're just so entirely vulnerable for any type of interaction and touch at the moment. Then you take a look at his face and you're shocked to see how handsome he is.

His long raven locks go past his broad shoulders that is covered with a loose breathable crew neck. Not only are his eyes pretty in color but the shape as well;his kind monolids gazing at you right now practically has you flustered. "It's alright..I was leaving anyhow." You mumble with a nervous smile.

"Nooo! Stay! This table has so much room!" A chipper,more energetic voice adds in. Your attention is turned to the voice and this time you're even more shocked at how good looking this man is too. He has snow white hair that frames his pretty face along with eyes so blue they're almost hypnotizing. But again something in your belly finds those eyes too familiar almost like you've met the men before.

"Oh no you wouldn't wanna sit with me...people will start talking about you too." The black haired man smiles,"Let them talk," he extends his long arm on the back of the seat next to Gojo,"sit." Gojo moves from that seat to make sure you're the one in the middle of the two men. You shyly nod,"Thank you."

You sit down and feel a sudden presence of something....something intense between the three of you despite just making their acquaintance. "My name is Suguru Geto,"he points to the other man beside you,"This is Satoru Gojo." He smiles and waves,"What's your name cutie?" The white haired man peers at you as he awaits the answer to his question. "(Reader Full Name),nice to meet you guys."

The both say it's nice to meet you also and you guys chatter about each others day,major etc. "Have you eaten yet?" Suguru asks. "Umm kinda,the food I got wasn't very good so I just threw it away." Gojo say,"Oh no,eat with us! Me and Guru always eat good food so you'll like it for sure."

"No no it's okay! I wouldn't wanna have you guys pay for anything from the food bar." You used the word pay because all the good food you have to pay for instead of meal swipes. And because you're suddenly shunned from this town you're naturally unable to keep a job anymore,therefore making you broker than a joke. "I'll pay." Gojo says.

"It's o—" Gojo interrupts,his big hand managing to fully wrap around your plump upper arm,"I'll pay." He affirms. You just nod silently and watch as he walks up to the food bar to buy the items. Geto looks at you and smile,"So what's a pretty girl like you sitting all by herself for?"

You look down and feel your tummy doing backflips for two reasons;the compliment and the question. You're nervous to explain just why you're being ignored and you're nervous you'll mess up the chance of making new friends. However,you go for being honest and not lying,just to see if they'll actually be someone you'll want to have as companions.

"Well two months ago an incident happened at the lake with my friends. They were attacked by two monsters and I was the only one to make it out alive. But the weird thing is...I wasn't attacked at all...they just ignored me and only went for my friends. But after they were done they looked at me in this way—this way that was so,"you pause,trying to find your bearings,"haunting. Not like they wanted to eat me but something else entirely..." Your rub your pudgy fingers as you explain and Geto does something surprising.

He grips your hands to stop the constant movement. His smooth fingers rub soothing circles on your now healed skin. And it feels so good to be touched with affection, so good that you almost forgot to finish your story. "I went to the police as soon as it happened and I was told it was probably an animal attack but I know what I saw...I know wholeheartedly. And that's why I was sitting alone,everyone thinks I'm some crazy person making stuff up." Your bottom lip begins to tremble as you feel tears begin to pool in your eyes.

"And you probably think I'm crazy now too..." Your voice breaks and your brain is working overtime. How humiliating that you're breaking down to a total stranger in public too! God,why are you so pathetic? So vulnerable to the point you easily melt into the arms of an unknown person. Has your sense of self truly scrambled that far away from you?

Geto extends his arm to wrap around your supple body,he's warm and smells like ocean breeze mixed with sandalwood. "I don't, I believe you." It's a whisper yet the impact is like a loud shout. "You do?" He gets closer,his soft pink lips muttering so close to the shell of your ear,"I do." You shiver involuntarily,your body unable to contain the way his coo affected you physically.

"Thank you." It's a mumble but still Geto acknowledges it with a soft squeeze on your body.

"I brought the food!" A happy voice interjects. Gojo sets down loads of plates of delectable looking food. And suddenly your tummy rumbles just looking at the many options of food.

Gojo hears it,"You hungry now?" You nod shyly and can't help but look down at the very good options. After weeks of eating too cold food and mess hall trash seeing the hot bar meals would make anyone hungry. White hair bobs as the tall man takes his seat next to you.

"Go on,eat." He smiles a toothy grin. His hand extends to your lips with a forkful of pasta that smells so good you literally inhale it. You instinctively open your mouth only to quickly close it. Because oh my God were you about to let this stranger feed you? Has hardly any human interaction made you so compliant?

Gojo pouts,"What's wrong?" You quickly try to reassure him,"It's nothing...but I can feed myself,y'know.." You almost forgot Geto is still holding you,the only cause for remembering is strictly based on the firm squeeze he gives your upper body. "Eat." He asks,more like demands.

Despite how demanding he sounded it was still gentle? Almost like a calming song in an odd way. You open your mouth and Gojo happily stuffs the fork in your mouth. You chew and melt into the flavors of the yummy dish but you can't fully enough it because the men you're sitting next to are quietly observing you.

Another bite is feed to you and another,then another until the pasta is all gone. Every single time you took a bite Geto and Gojo all watched in admiration. Geto,who still has you in a half embrace would caress the supple skin of your bare arms that are free from sleeves in your cotton cami. The texture of the pads of his fingers would rub you as you ate.

And Gojo would clean up your chubby face if he missed your mouth just a little bit. He'd use his thumb to wipe away the evidence of the mess with his oddly sharp and long tongue. His other hand also stayed close and near to the pudge that hangs low on your abdomen,practically cupping the fat that adorns the area.

And all while eating you didn't realize how intimate this interaction really is. Two men watching you as your spoon fed by one and both touching you so...personally;this is not a normal interaction between strangers. You know that,yet it feels too good to tell them to stop. You haven't been touched with affection in so long so why fight it when two handsome men are practically draped all over you?

"Would you like some dessert?" Geto asks. Gojo chimes in,"You should absolutely have some dessert. I got these cute cakes for you to try." You look down in embarrassment,"I don't know if I should...I just ate the pasta." Gojo quirks his brow up in confusion,"So? You can't have dessert too?"

You smile,"I guess I can." Gojo grins brightly,"Atta girl,open wide." Already with spoon in hand and a sweet treat in it, he moves it to your mouth. Of course you accept and chew happily on the sweet treat until a thought interrupts this indulgent interaction. Why haven't they eaten? You've been here,being fed and talked to by these for at least an hour or more,but they haven't eaten? Why come to the lunch hall then?

You quickly swallow the treat,"Aren't you guys hungry?" Geto answers,"Oh me and Gojo were earlier but watching you eat has satisfied our appetite." His response is followed with an enthusiastic nod by his blue eyed friend,"Mhm! You eat so cute it's hard not to get full."

You make a face full of doubt,"Umm,I dunno if you guys are trying to be overly nice to me but I don't believe that for one second." You push away Geto's hold on you and Gojo's slight grip on you to scoot away from the pair. Suddenly,you've fully realized that this whole thing is really weird even though you truly are enjoying the attention from the very good looking men.

But that enjoyment isn't enough to just ignore how fast and dangerous this all could possibly be. You don't know how you just dazed off and forgotten all about that. You stand up and urgently say,"Look,you guys have been really nice to me and I totally appreciate it but this is just all really weird for me so I'm just gonna—"

Geto stands up with such a quickness it's almost supernatural,"Shhh...you don't mean that sweet girl. Just come and sit with me and Saturo,yeah? We'll make all that confusion will go away,okay?" His words are so sweet,so soft and gentle;inviting to the point you almost relax back to the seat but you don't.

"No—can't. This is so personal and you guys don't even know me...plus everyone can see you behaving this way with me." You go to grab your bag but Gojo stops your exit this time. "C'mon cutie,it's okay. It's just me and Sugu,we wouldn't wanna do anything to hurt our lil pretty new friend. If it's the people watching...we can take you up to our dorm and continue this there."

Geto adds,"That's a good idea, all these people shouldn't be watching you anyways." You look at them in confusion and seriously debate if going back to their dorm is actually a good idea at all. "Don't treat your new friends like this;we're not gonna hurt you." Friends? Are they really calling themselves friends?

You bite your lip and glare down at your beat up sneakers,"I don't know.." Gojo pulls you close to him by gripping your soft hand,"It's okay,cutie. It's just me and Geto,we won't do anything."

You bite your lip,stumped with providing them with an answer,it's useless though because an arm links with yours and already starts ushering you along to exit the mess hall. "W-Wait!" You try to pull yourself away from the limb but it's like forged iron. Geto utters,"It's okay. Just come with us. It's just us."

You were panicked,worried,anxious to the point of feeling like throwing up. The feeling washes away as Geto soothes you with his words;odd considering the fact that he's not explicitly saying anything too calming. He's just talking,yet his syllables feel like warm chamomile tea that just eases your mind and heart.

It feels magical...too artificial of a feeling it's almost like being on a high. The feeling only increases when Gojo joins his friend in talking to you;literally and metaphorically syncing with him as he also links his arm with yours.

The longer they talk the more woozy you begin to feel. Your walls of distrust and logic melt away like rapid candle wax,so much so that you begin teeter into their touch.

Your mind is confused and vulnerable to the point you don't realize you're in front of their dorm room until Gojo pulls you into the room. They both free you of their hold and suddenly you feel more conscious.

"Why'd you take me here? I didn't even get a say.." Geto rubs the apparent flesh on the back of your arms,"It's alright...you'll enjoy being with us." Your brows scrunch and you want to spew something aggressive but his touch and his voice are just too...distracting.

"G-Geto.." you whimper. You don't know why you say his name,it's just the only thing your mouth will allow you to say. "Yes, tell me what do you want?" You snuggle closer into his touch,breathless and confused,"I don't know..." Gojo then walks closer to you,taking up the front portion of your body. His hands cling to your wide waist;digits dig into the dough like flesh.

"Would you like for us to give you an option?" The long haired man whispers in your ear,his lips practically pecking the shell of the cartilage. You're weak and feel all too needy. Needy for what is the real question though.

"Please,yes.." you lowly whimper. With that the two men place you onto a soft bouncy mattress,leaving you without the their touch for a few minutes but that doesn't last for long. Gojo already has his hands on your tummy,practically massaging the flesh with his hands. He leans forwards and starts suckling on the skin of your nape.

He starts thumbing the beginning of your loose fitting shorts,"I think these should come off." You gulp and grip onto him,"I-I haven't shaved just so you know." Gojo starts pulling down the waistband to the point he could see your bellybutton,"I didn't ask if you shaved,I said these should come off." You gasp as you feel a new pair of hands on your thighs—pulling down the bottom half of the outfit.

Geto looks up at you from the position of him being on his knees;slotted perfectly in between your big thighs. "I agree with Saturo,everything should just come off you." Gojo starts pulling off the hem of your panties and once they're low enough Geto grabs the material and carefully slides them off your legs. He does something unusual,by bringing the damp material to his face and taking a deep inhale. He groans into the panties,eyes closed in bliss and a deep harbored groan flees his lips.

Gojo looks down in jealousy and whines for his other half to hand him the undies. You watch as Geto begrudgingly passes him the undergarment. Gojo brings them to his face and his bright blues eyes almost glow with light as he huffs in the smell of your pussy. "Mate smells so good. Fuck..." You brows furrow in confusion,what did he mean by mate? It's such a primitive and almost animal like to refer to you as that. You don't have much time to think of it though as demand takes all your attention.

"Spread,so we can see that pretty pussy..." The ravenette orders you. You're about to do it but insecurity nags at you,the condition of your unshaven and wild looking pussy drains away at your confidence. What's the point of spreading anyway? The fat of your lips and hair will block the view of anything worth looking at.

"Spread." Gojo repeats. You shake your head no;embarrassment and now common sense are starting to grow back into your brain. Both of the men huff,annoyed with the fact they can't just view the pussy they can smell from miles away,even in water.

For two months since they last fed,they've been so stuck on finding this woman with an unearth like aroma. The being smelt of brown sugar and sweet honey. They've been so determined to find the owner of the scent they've enrolled in this stupid college and kept tabs on you for so long.

Now they have you,almost bare,snagged in their hypnotic touch,yet you won't even let them see what rightfully belongs to them? No. That just won't do.

"Gojo,bring the mirror over here." Immediately the man sitting next to you stands up and retrieves a long floor length mirror to right in front of the bed. You observe yourself in the mirror,tired eyes that look bothered, your flustered face and your slightly messy hair,all the way to your bare lower body.

Why bring the mirror though? Your question is answered when Geto suddenly arises from the floor,taking the space the former was sitting on the bed. His strong hand grips the fatty flesh of your thigh,placing it on his lap. Gojo,now sitting on the opposite side does the same action. You fluster,"What're you doing?" Gojo hums with a happy expression,"Spreading."

They both extend your legs further til your pussy is completely exposed to them in the view of the mirror. "Perfect." Geto says lowly into the cusp of your neck and shoulder. "So pretty,I just wanna lick it." You tensed at the admiration for such a private area,a private area that four pair of eyes are constantly eyeing hungrily.

"So many things we could make you do..." The white haired man suggests. "Mhm,but right now I wanna see her play with it." Geto answers. "P-Play with it?" You try to close your legs back but their grips are too strong on your legs. You couldn't do that—not in front of them. It's embarrassing;being open and exposing yourself raw like that.

Gojo whines,"You're so mean. Trying to close what's rightfully ours. Just play with it...you wanna make yourself feel good,right?" His words and his touch feel like the law,like you have to obey. He didn't say anything overly convincing,yet your body can't help but comply.

Your pudgy digits reach down in between the plump lips—traveling way down to the pulsing hole. The fingers circle the entrance,barely touching the wet flesh. You huff at the light touch,already feeling needy. "It's alright,you can put one in." Geto urges.

You gaze into the mirror,observing the sight of your finger so easily sliding into the welcoming hole. A gasp flees your lips as the appendage starts moving in and out of you. "There you go...keep going."

You obey,moving the lone finger faster and harder than the first few movements. "Fuckkkk,that looks so good. Mate looks so good playing with her pussy." Gojo howls out. Playing with your pussy is not the only view you're able to see in mirror. Gojo and Geto's are in the displaying glass as well;their hard cocks out in the open as they go up and down at the same pace as you.

You bite your lip,immensely turned on by the view of the two men bringing themselves sweet undeniable pleasure. Their hands wander up and down your legs,holding tight the excess flesh you have on the limbs. Geto groans,"Your legs are so pretty,just like the rest of you. So plump and soft. Perfect for giving you so many pups." You moan at his words,adding another digit for the adding bliss.

Blue eyes close in joy,"Oh? You like that? Wanna get pregnant with me and Sugu's babies? Wanna be full of pups?" His hips stutter up into his o shaped hand,"F-Fuck,say yes! Tell us how badly you want that." A whine falls from your babbling mouth,"Want! Need it so bad." Geto groans as he reaches over you to bite into the soft skin of your neck;sinking his teeth in so deep you can feel the light liquid of blood dribble down. Your back arches at the strange sensation that hurts,yet feels oddly so good.

Gojo also goes for a bite,lower though,he finds the spot of your plump shoulder to be perfect. "Mm,you're gonna take it so well when me and Gojo fuck you." The ravenette mumbles into your flesh. His hand travels down to the pouch of your fat that rest slightly above your uterus,he gives it a harsh grasp;fingers digging into the moldable skin. "Perfect,so perfect for giving babies."

Your digits curl into the wet cavern and your body almost folds itself just trying to reach that special spot that resides so deeply in you. You whimper in frustration,your average sized fingers not being just enough to reach that oh so very special spot.

Gojo laughs,"Can't reach? It's okay cutie,me and Sugu will be touching you there all the damn time. Just continue making yourself feel good,yeah? Want you to cum all over your little fingers so I can lick it off." With that bit of encouragement,you thrust deeper;curling the digits so far they're like hooks going into your sloppy cunt.

"Mmmm,look at your cute face. Making such adorable faces in the mirror for us.." Geto hums in your neck,lapping up with rouge from his bite with his slender tongue. Gojo grips your chubby face in his palm,"Right,look at those pudgy cheeks,just wanna bite em." He releases his hold and goes for a gentle nibble on the fat,almost suckling on it like a baby.

With a loud moan,your hand darts out to get a hold on Geto's hair;an action he revels in,loving the harsh pull on the silky strands. "Feels so good." You stammer. "Yeah? That feels good?" Geto purrs. You nod furiously,too caught up in your own pleasure to chatter anymore.

Geto and Gojo experience the same feeling—their eyes are shut in pure anticipation,their pretty swollen tips throbbing to let out the milky substance. You moan louder at the reflection in the mirror;the glass showing you the two men who are so close to falling off the brink of pleasure. The men who just look so desperate to spill all over your spread form.

Faster,harder,deeper is all the thought your mind allows you to even think. Your fingers are working overtime,trying to get over that brink of sweet ecstasy. With one hard thrust,your essence splays all over the mirror,distorting the clear reflection of the glass.

Geto cums soon after,then Gojo. As they do,they make it obvious the cum is all over your body. It mostly splatters on your thighs and your tummy.

You breathe heavily and look at them in astonishment,"Oh my God..."

You couldn't believe it,couldn't believe cumming in front of people you just met,couldn't believe letting them cum all over you,couldn't believe hearing them call you mate and say things like mate—isn't that really weird? You sit up away from the duo and look at them suspiciously. And again you feel more conscious without their touch on you. More like you can clearly think and think logically.

"Why'd you wanna do this with me?" It's accusing,the question,it practically spews suspicion if it wasn't obvious enough. Geto reaches to touch your thigh,but you move away. "Don't touch me. I dunno what's going on with you two...but it's weird."

Gojo chuckles,"Aww,cutie are you feeling nervous? It's okay—" You cut him off with a desperate shout,"Answer my question! Please! Why?"

They look at each other for a few long seconds,thinking about what to say. You know they’re probably thinking about some elaborate lie that won’t even begin to fool you. How could you be so stupid? So easily wooed to do something so very intimate with these strangers? God,could you be anymore stupid?

They don’t give you any answers—no,the much bigger men tackle you onto the bed. Their hands grab all and any appendage that could fight back.

There it is again…that strange drossy feeling. It returns with a revenge time,it no longer feels like a light enjoyable feeling. Now it’s overtaking all your senses,stealing away your conscious mind.

“Sleep. You want to sleep. Sleep. You want to sleep.” Both of the voices chant to you,repeating the phrase over and over again. No! You don’t want to sleep,yet the more the repeat,the more they tell you what you want,the more your eyes begin to sag and you no longer see anything more.

Black.

▂▂▂▂▂

“No,Su’ you’re not covering her enough!” The annoyed voice of blue eyed man shouts. Geto huffs,”That’s all we have left in us. We could rub it in to scent her further. Calm down.”

Lips pout out in a childlike manner,”I’m just sayin so we can be careful. So many will probably want out mate,she’s so perfect for pups after all.” A chuckle follows,”You’re so possessive sometimes. No one will want her since we’ve marked her.”

“Oh,I’m possessive? You’re the one who said we should eat everyone just because that little guy friend of her touched her while making an escape. I—“Gojo points to his chest proudly,”just wanted to eat two or three but you got all murdery after he touched her.”

Geto rolls his black irises so far they disappear into the white of his socket,”Whatever. You would’ve ate them all anyways because you’re so damn jealous of others having her attention.” Gojo gasps,offending greatly,”Am not! I don’t get jealous like you!”

Geto laughs amused,knowing exactly how his life long friend works,”Alright,you win.” The white haired man hums triumphantly. Physically saying,”I know that’s right!”

“But are you sure we shouldn’t cum a little more on her?” Gojo cranes his head to look next to him,”No,we have to save some when we cum in her so we fertilize the eggs.” He nods,accepting the answer.

▂▂▂▂▂

When you wake up you’re greeted with the sight of loitering heads hanging above you.

You attempt to yelp only to have a hand roughly clap against your mouth. “Shhh,the yell will only echo in the cave.” A high voice says. Cave? Last time you checked you weren’t in a cave;the last location being a college dorm rooms.

The now known voice of Gojo exclaims,”I’m so happy you’re up though! Me and Geto were getting worried that we’d have to give you pups while you were asleep. Which is no fun cause we can’t hear your pretty little moans like that.” You cringe at his explanation—the thought of being used unconsciously giving you the creeps.

You get more creeped out though,the view of your surroundings not seeming so promising. There’s visible peeled human flesh in the cave,scattered around the stone. And the smell of old iron and rotten flesh takes over your nostrils. Oh God…you fingerfucked yourself in front of a bunch of monsters. And they probably want to eat you next too,just like your friends! Once they’re tired of you, you’re definitely on the menu.

Tears start streaming down your chubby face and your body begins to shake. “Just eat me already! Please don’t play with me and just eat me!” Your pathetic cries are met with laughter. This pauses your sobbing because why are they laughing at you?

“Oh my God! You’re so cute! Eat you? Noo!” Gojo folds over clutching his bare abdomen. Geto joins the laughter,”You’re so silly,we don’t want to eat you! You’re our mate! Imagine that,Gojo? Eating all our future pups like that!” Mate? Pups? These words sound familiar,like the ones they were saying the last time…intimacy happened.

Now that you look them in their true form you see why they chose the verbiage. They have scales matching their hair colors coating all four of their limbs,paired with gills on the neck’s and sides. As they laugh they also show their three rows of flesh piercing teeth. They were definitely some kind of animal like creature. But what?

“So you’re not gonna eat me?” You ask tentatively. Geto nods,”No,we want to make you our mate. That’s why we went through all that trouble of getting you.” Gojo urges in agreement,”Mhm! We just wanna fill you with pups and live with ya forever. And actually,”he lowers his hand down to his bare crotch gripping his already hard cock,”We’ve been meaning to do it soon as we brought you here. But you’re such a sleepyhead we had to wait til you woke up.”

You watch as he gives it a good stroke,looking you up and down as does so. And that’s when you realize you’re completely bare too;with some white milky substance coating your whole body. Another voice joins in,”Mhm,we’ve been dying to get inside you. And I don’t intend on waiting any longer.”

“W-Wait!” You try to protest but it’s no avail,Gojo is already on top of your naked body. Grips and gropes are felt all over from the monster,your chest,your plentiful body,your wide supple hips that sting as his hold won’t get any looser. He licks and bites every fiber in skin in front of him,everything being marked by his rough movements.

Geto comes in front of your laying position,stroking up and down as he watches his companion go feral with his urges. “Warm her up,Satoru. Make her feel good first.” He doesn’t respond verbally,his actions speaking loud enough for him;his mouth moves to suckle on the hard bud on top your breast aching for some type of stimulation.

You moan at the sensation only to be silenced by a passionate kiss from the long haired man. His tongue intertwines with yours creating a languid dance with the pink muscles. Gojo pops off your breast,sounding breathless and needy.

“I don’t wanna wait no more..Wanna be inside.” He whines,already lining up his cock with your soaked entrance. Geto sighs,”Maybe I should fuck her first…I’m more patient.” It’s a loud protest,”NO! Me! Please I want to first.”

You interrupt,swollen mouth readily to spew exactly what you want at this moment,”Just do it. Fuck me.” You don’t know what came over you to say that. Maybe it was their hypnotizing touch? They’re intimidatingly now known power over you? Or perhaps after months of being so harshly ignored you just needed this. Needed to be molded and groomed just to be something again…Whatever it is leads to the man on top of you finally giving into his desires.

With a shaky groan he impales you with his cock. He doesn’t halt nor wait for you to adjust—his urges of breeding being too strong. As he bucks into you he reshapes your legs to his satisfaction,bending them all the way against the fat of your stomach;indulging in the way the soft flesh jiggles with each rough piston of his hips.

“Good! Feel so good!” He howls into the echoing cave. “Look at you,taking it like such a good mate.” Geto purrs,rubbing his now scale textured palm on your soft face. “You see all the faces she makes when you’re fucking her,Saturo?”

“Y-Yeah! So cute!” He thrusts harder into your welcoming cunt,contorting himself to almost nuzzle your face every time he goes in and out of you. You whine and grip onto him,feeling an orgasm coming soon. You face twists into one of awaiting pleasure;the orgasm just teetering away from you.

“She’s about to cum! Go faster!” Geto encourages. Gojo,obliges,each of his harsh thrust definitely leaving bruising marks on the back of thighs and asscheeks.

Every movement is like a symphony—coordinating your final path to pleasure. The instruments? The clapping noises of Gojo prodding your hole roughly and passionately. The applause? The sweet noises you’d let fly past your tongue. And finally with one last shove into you,the orchestrater of your orgasm allowed you to sing his high praises.

You see white,yet Gojo doesn’t stop his hips—No he goes faster until he oozes into you hot white sticky semen. He stiffens for a second then reels back into the cavern,to the point his tip kisses your cervix. He stays in you until an odd sensation travels through your walls.

Orbs or something resembling a sphere fight against the strict wall of your womb. It starts with one,then the second,the the third,and the fourth is when you start to feel the invasion of whatever is being deposited in you.

“W-What’s going on?” Geto leans down and kisses your plump cheek,”Gojo’s giving you his pups. Don’t worry it’ll only hurt when they try to get into your womb,but you’re such a good mate you’ll take all of them.”

“A-All of them?” The reparation doesn’t help with understanding the idea. “All of them! And then you’re gonna take Sugu’s too! Isn’t that great?” Gojo joyfully informs you.

Your brain and body hurts so you simply just nod,pretending like you know what they mean. You’re tired. So tired that you lean into Geto’s gentle cupping of your face,closing your eyes;letting the two beings do whatever they want at this point.

Allowing yourself to be totally and wholly consumed by them.

REBLOGS AND COMMENTS ARE GREATLY APPRECIATED 🫶🏽🫶🏽 tysm for reading

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z0mbbiegvrl · 2 months ago

Text

｡𖦹°‧CRAIGS GANG DATING HEADCANNONS

↳ an: hope you enjoy this!! this was requested!!! sorry for the long wait for my next post, once school's out, i'll be ten times for consistent.

↳ cw: small hints of suggestive material but honestly this is just fluffy!!!

↳ mlist

↪ ★ CRAIG TUCKER

Craig holds himself up with a ‘I don’t give a fuck’ attitude as we all know and have seen but when you two start hanging out before dating, you realize that he’s just a sweet guy with many walls. But lucky for you, you know how to break those down.

Craig is a big astronomy person. His room is decorated with space-themed, NASA posters, small astronaut figures, and his ceiling is covered in glow-in-the-dark stars. Hell, even his guinea pigs’ cage has a small alien space ship-shaped hut. Most nights you two spend together, you guys often lie on his floor at stare at the green glowing stars while Craig tells you facts about space.

He isn’t the biggest fan of PDA, but he will hold your hand, arm around your neck, or hand on your waist. But that’s it. Also not big on pet names, but he will call you ‘Babe’ or ‘Honey’ in any situation.

Craig is such an admirer of you. He can spend hours of your hangout time just staring at your features. Every time he sees you, he finds something new to focus on. New makeup, new hairstyle, new thinking expression, he’s locked in on it. Probably has RBF, but you can catch the way his eyes soften a bit. (Don’t call him out because he will play it off.)

Tricia is your best friend. When you plan to hang out with Craig, your plans often get put on hold so you can go hang out with Tricia. You engage in her school gossip, makeovers, and prank calling people from her school and your high school. Tricia often asks to hang out with you guys, but Craig most of the time says no.

His mom, Laura, really likes you. Will not hesitate to pull out the photo album and tell you stories about Craig when he was little. His father, Thomas, also likes you. Thinks you’re a good match for his son. Probably a little shocked his son even has a partner, knowing his son’s personality. Both of them are pretty relaxed with you spending the night, though the door is not allowed to be locked.

Loves binge watching movies/shows with you. Silence, a movie/show he can rewatch anytime, and his partner? Count him in, he is SAT. This is what most of your date nights consist of.

Despite his very ‘meh’ attitude and tone of voice, you assume he wouldn’t be the best with your feelings. Not in a rude way, but he just doesn’t seem like the most involved person. But the first time you came to him upset, he was there for you. Sure, it took him a second not to try and ease you right away, but instead he listened and let you get out how you felt and why before he came in and tried to help. That is how you two fix small fights. Craig is a good communicator.

Most weekend nights, you and Craig’s gang all hang out at Tolkien’s house. Mostly because he’s rich and has a pool.

You two definitely dress up his guinea pig in cute little outfits while you’re hanging out. Both of you have an album on your phones of just Stripe in his modeling era. pirate hats, witch hats, etc.

Craig just gives me the vibes of being the one who kissed you first. Both hands holding your face, thumbs rubbing your cheeks. The most romantic thing he does for you.

Loves writing letters for you. Finds it easier to say how much he cares and loves you while writing it on paper. writes burn after you read at the bottom, but you never do. You have a small shoebox filled with all his letters, neatly placed and preserved.

In every photo you two have of each other, Craig is flipping the camera off. At first, it was a little annoying, but now you’re used to it, and both of you do it together.

↪ ★ JIMMY VALMER

Jimmy is a man of many jokes, but at times his poetry skills sneak out in ways to wow you. He’ll say the most amazing thing, then play it off as one of his jokes with a “wow, what a great audience” before changing the subject like he didn’t just make you blush hardcore.

Jimmy loves to take you out for date night if you’re both up for it, have money, and a car. Why not? Date nights consist of going to arcades, comedy clubs, or places that do karaoke. These nights are never dull. Jimmy will go on stage just to see you laugh. Both of you get competitive at the arcades before combining your tickets to win those super expensive prizes.

LOVES LOVES LOVES complimenting you. Anything he can find about you, he can make into a compliment; he’s doing it. Sometimes he’ll just compliment weird things, like your nose is looking extra nice that day, or your breathing is taking his breath away.

Jimmy is a GENTLEMAN. holding doors for you? Check. Buying dinner for you? Check. Making sure you’re happy? CHECK CHECK CHECK. Jimmy just loves to treat you like you hung the stars.

Enjoys cuddling with you, head resting on your shoulder while you both watch something on your phone or mindlessly scroll through TikTok. Though sometimes, he’ll get bored and feel lonely (as if he’s not holding you like you’re a lifeline) and begin to pepper kisses on his face and neck.

He loves buying you little trinkets. If he sees something that reminds him of you when he’s out, he’ll get it and bring it to you. Lots of funny keychains. Found one that said ‘Intercourse' state, and it is now hanging on your key chain.

He’s good with your family, and never showed an ounce of nervousness the first time he was going to have dinner with your family. By the time dinner was served, your family already liked him. Between his jokes and personality, it’s not that hard to think he’s cool, but seeing how he treats you, yeah, Jimmy already had them wrapped around his finger.

Jimmy’s hair is super soft and fluffy. Whenever you two are cuddling and you absentmindly start to play with his hair, he’s knocked the fuck out after you run your fingers through it once.

He lets you decorate his crutches with stickers. He’ll proudly walk around with the most girly stickers or weird ones. He’ll make you two match stickers, getting duo packs so he can have one on his crutch and you can have one on your phone. The newest matching stickers you two have are “I come in peace” and “I’m peace”.

Jimmy is a pretty confident guy when it comes to you, so he kissed you first. After the nerves of the first kiss go away, the dude loves kissing you. Lips, face, hands, anything. Sometimes his braces catch your lips, and he’ll apologize over and over.

His parents like you. His mother and father will invite you over for dinner, and they are just happy their son found someone to spend his time with. His dad probably embarrasses him by walking into his room and giving you a small lecture on being safe if he sees the door closed.

↪ ★ TOLKIEN BLACK

Tolkien is a very sweet and supportive boyfriend.

Always interested in what you’re currently obsessed with. Will let you go on and on about it and never get bored. And he LISTENS, he’ll ask you things about whatever you’re talking about, and never makes you feel like a chatterbox.

He takes you out on dates a lot. Always on time, opens the car door for you, and of course, takes you to a nice dinner. I headcannon him as a guy who would enjoy date nights at places that have outdoor seating, he likes the small candlelit table with the moonlight and heaters glowing on you perfectly.

Spoils you. No extra comments needed.

He’s on the football team, so expect after every game, a very tired and sweaty Tolkien to run up to you and give you a crushing hug. You’re his personal cheerleader so he’ll look for you at every game and smile at you once he spots you. Has better game days when you’re there cheering him on.

On a night when you two want to relax, you’ll watch movies together while lying on his living room couch. You two cuddle yourself to sleep, waking up with sore necks and dry mouths as the credits roll. Tolkien checks his phone and sees a text from his mom in the family group chat, which is a photo of you two sleeping peacefully.

Speaking of his parents, Steve and Linda Black both treat you as if you’ve been their son’s partner for his whole life. The first dinner with them was intimidating because of just how rich they were, and you assumed they were one of those ‘we’ll make sure our son marries into money’ type of parents, but nope. Right away, you fit in like a perfect puzzle piece, and that night, Linda made sure Tolkien added you to their group chat.

Invites you to movie nights with his parents. You all watch The Lord of the Rings, and about halfway through, you and Tolkien give each other that look and decide to sneak off to the kitchen to raid the freezer and pantry for snacks. His parents are very surprised when they realize you two are gone and you two are making out in the kitchen with ice cream tubs next to you.

I know I was just gassing him up, but as much as he won’t admit it to you, Tolkien is pretty stuck up. It was the way he was raised, and no, he won’t change. Maybe he’ll tone it down depending on what you’re doing and how you feel about it, but the next day he’ll go right back to it.

Tolkien is also a confident person when it comes to you, so he was the one to make the first move. And it happened on your first date. He had wanted to do it since you had known each other your whole childhood, so he wasn’t scared to kiss you so soon into your beginning relationship. Once he took you home, walked you to your front door, and kissed you passionately on your lips, before he said a quick goodbye and left, leaving you speechless.

He helps you study for tests and school. Honestly acts like a mom when it comes to school; he wants to help you succeed. Even if he doesn’t know what to do, he’ll learn right next to you. Won’t get annoyed if you don’t catch on right away, he’ll take it at the pace you need until you’re confident in the material.

↪ ★ TWEEK TWEAK

Oh, this poor boy is so nervous. He’s already a nervous wreck when it comes to his day-to-day life, but the second you two start dating, it increases by ten thousand.

Whenever you two hang out, you’ll help him around the coffee shop. You’re like an unofficial employee. Tweek treats it like a date, but on the clock. Honestly, it helps with his nerves and focus if you’re there, taking some of the load off of his shoulders, though sometimes he’ll micromanage things if he sees you doing something a different way than he does, but most of the time he’ll let you do your thing. Though this only happens on days Tweek is working alone or his dad is off running errands, since they’d rather keep the shop family only.

Tweek isn’t that comfortable with PDA, which is okay; you never want to upset him. He’ll hold your hand out in public, maybe a little too tight, but he’ll feel relaxed the moment your thumb rubs against his hand.

Being around your boyfriend, you learn what makes him tick and overthink too much. So, you help him calm down. Teaching him breathing exercises, meditating, and even the 3-3-3 grounding technique. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t, but Tweek softens up whenever you immediately try to help, and once he’s calmed down, he’ll give you the biggest hug and thank you for being there.

Tweek’s parents are probably a little indifferent to you. They aren’t wowed by you or thinking you’re going to harm their son. They’ll invite you to have dinner with them, ask about who you are as a person, and then that’s it. But you know they appreciate you taking care of their son, as his father, Richard, asks you to try out new coffee flavors for the shop. And his mother is inviting you over for coffee and a little chat before you and Tweek go off to hang out.

Dates with Tweek are very personal. Going to places that are meaningful to both of you and have a nice, romantic environment. Biking around town, sitting in the coffee shop after hours, or if you’re both feeling adventurous, he’ll take you to his favorite amusement park. Which, for sure, surprised you that he even wanted to go.

Physical touch and words of affirmation are his love languages. He’ll spend hours in your company just enjoying being the little spoon, your hand tracing his arm softly, telling him sweet little nothings about how you feel about him. He finds security in these moments between you two. Makes him feel like you two are in your little world, and nothing else matters. Honestly, this is the only way you can get the poor boy to sleep well.

He loves baking for you, he’ll spend his whole time before you go to his house baking your favorite sweet treat. When you get there, he’ll be covered in flour but holding out a plate with your treats on it. He blushes when he realizes just how happy you get when you see what he did for you. You two will watch TV while enjoying the treats.

This is no surprise, but you made the first move, and it didn’t happen super early in the relationship. Maybe about six months, mostly because you were waiting to see if he would do it, and just figured he was overthinking it before you noticed he was checking out your lips, and you just went for it. Now, he will make the first move, but he’ll blush hard afterwards.

↪ ★ CLYDE DONOVAN

Okay, Clyde’s ego is through the ROOF, so when he asked you out, he was “hey, [Y/N], wanna go on a date?” and you said yeah before going off to class. Clyde let that get to his head for the whole date until he realized that you were actually someone he could see himself with and immediately dropped his ego personality to let you get to know him, and then BOOM, randomly, you two started dating.

When he gets comfortable around you, he’s still an emotional person like he was as a boy. But he can handle it a lot better now. Being with you kinda helped him learn that it was okay to feel sad, and it didn’t make him less than a man, like his friends used to think when they bullied him.

I believe he’s still chubby even as he’s gotten older, not anywhere near the level of Eric. But it helps with football since he’s more sturdy than most of the guys there.

Despite what you might think, he treats you so good. He can be such a romantic when he’s in a relationship, with his whole player/hotshit mindset, he is the kinda guy to bring you a flower when you go out on a date, make playlists for you, sit through movies you like that he doesn’t care for, etc.

He for sure remembers the shoe thing. It’s a memory that lives in the back of his mind whenever he’s trying to sleep. But he trusts you enough that you’re not going out with him for shoes (he noticed your shoes and how beat up they were, and those fears went out the window)

He’ll treat you like royalty, since his dad has mall connections, he’ll take you out for a shopping spree. He’ll even carry all your bags if you ask nicely.

He’s super big on PDA, holding hands everywhere, arm around your neck, waist, kissing you before leaving you to go to class, pretty much anything, he’ll do it. Mostly because he wants to show you off in any way he can.

Speaking of showing you off, he brags about how he has the hottest girl to his friends, random people. He’ll show you off at his football games by winking at you during halftime. He’ll brag to you about his dad and stepmother. Anyone who will listen, you’re the first thing he talks about.

He for sure uses a lot of pet names, honey, baby, babe, even some funny ones like sexy, hot stuff, snookums.

Meeting his dad and stepmom went pretty well. His dad thought you were the perfect girl since you put up with his son’s ego, and Janice thought you were such a sweet girl, she invited you to bake with her and to go shopping with her. Janice has grown on Clyde, so he thinks it’s cute that his girlfriend and his stepmother get along.

Clyde made the first move, but he was pretty nervous about it. He may seem like he knows what he’s doing, but he was so scared of being a bad kisser that you’d dump him, so he waited until he could just do it as a spur-of-the-moment thing, and it didn’t have any build-up. Your guy’s first kiss was not sloppy or messy; he was so gentle with it that you were shocked. Now he doesn’t overthink it, he’ll just smooch you and go on with his day.

↪ ★ BUTTERS STOTCH

He is still the sweetest boy ever. He at first didn’t think he had a chance with you at all. His friends constantly ruined his confidence, so when he realized he liked you, he tried to avoid you, thinking you wouldn’t give him a second glance, but when he finally got the nerve to ask you on a date, and you said yes, he practically jumped in the air.

As seen in the relationships he’s been in, Butters gives his WHOLE heart to you. If it’s within his abilities, he’s doing it for you without any questions.

Butters is very clingy, he’ll call you multiple times a day, and text you every day. The only exception to this is when he’s grounded, BUT Butters will find a way. (Dougie will randomly drop by your house and bring you little notes from Butters.) Or if he’s feeling risky, he’ll use the burner phone he bought to call you, though sometimes you can barely hear him because he has to whisper.

He talks about you to his friends so much that you swear they can’t name something about you that they don’t already know. Whether that’s a blessing or a curse is up to you.

Dates with Butters involve going to Willy’s Chilly Ice Cream Parlor using his employee discount. He’ll scoop ice cream for you if you decide to have a date while he’s working, pretending he doesn’t know you and you're his customer, will flirt with you and play up the joke until he takes a break, and you two share a sundae.

Butters is a FEIN for PDA, always holding your hand, locking pinkies together, resting his chin on your shoulder or neck. Butters is all over that stuff. He doesn’t care where you guys are unless it’s at his house, then he’s less all over you, probably only locking pinkies.

He calls you every nickname under the sun. “Sweetie pie”, “Honeybunches”, and “Cutie Patootie”. Will expect you to call him those nicknames back, doesn’t care how cheesy it is, but he loves it.

He keeps a long list of everything you like and or mention so he can surprise you with it or something similar to it. It warms your heart, shows you just how much he cares, and listens to you even when you think he’s not paying attention.

Loves taking photos of you during your dates, he’ll stare at them when you’re apart so he can remember how he felt during that moment, and it makes him feel good and can completely change his mood if he wasn’t in a good one.

Meeting Butters’ parents went a lot better than one would assume. Linda, his mother, gives me the vibes that she would deep clean the entire house if she knew you were coming over, wanting to keep up that family dynamic style. Honestly, just as long as you have good manners and they see how you’re not trying to ruin their son in any way, his parents don’t side-eye you as much. Stephen acts like you’re not a big deal; he doesn’t go out of his way to know you outside of if you’re a good person. When you keep coming over, they still act a little weird to you, but once Stephen starts grounding you with Butters, you realize that they have finally accepted you into their family.

Shockingly, Butters made the first move. It was after a work date with him, sharing ice cream when he finally kissed you. You could taste the strawberry ice cream he had been eating. After the kiss broke, he blushed hard and asked if that was okay before he did it again. Now later on in the relationship, Butters is a fein for any type of kissing. That first kiss released a whole different Butters

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bunji-enthusiast · 3 months ago

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Okay, Bunji, I saw you do the guardians and some Marvel rivals content for Invincible, so I just had to ask. Can you do a Mantis(in Marvel rivals) reader x Mark? Like their bonding over being alien in a way? Reader going from sweet sunshine and rainbows to angry and full of rage so suddenly and then so suddenly switching back after their anger was released? Also, they still have their sleep spores like in-game and are so precise and accurate with them. It's okay if not loll.

𝐇𝐢𝐠𝐡 𝐄𝐧𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 (𝐓𝐨 𝐅𝐚𝐥𝐥)

Mark Grayson x Mantis!reader

Note // definitely! Love me a good bonding moment over mutual things :33

Sorta wrote this in a platonic way, but you’re free to view it as romantic too!

"I don't belong here... do you?"

Mark admits it one night after a brutal mission. You’re both lying on the rooftop of some quiet Earth city, watching the stars. You tell him you never really felt like you belonged anywhere until you found your team. He laughs — dry and tired — and says it’s the same for him, but even now, sometimes it’s like the world’s trying to spit him out. You touch his shoulder, and your empathy ability kicks in automatically. You feel his pain like it’s your own — the guilt, the isolation, the pressure. And you tell him gently, “You’re not alone, Mark. I feel it too.”

Sometimes you don’t even need words. You can feel when Mark’s about to break, when the weight of trying to be Earth’s hero is caving in on him. You don't intrude, but when he comes to you — you’re there with a calm aura, soft energy, and maybe even a little healing flower if he needs it. Mark doesn’t get how it works, but just being around you makes it feel like the world isn’t crushing him for a while. That’s enough.

"You hide how strong you are."

He notices this about you — how you hold back, how you try not to scare people. Mark recognizes that. You both laugh one day about how you’ve absolutely ended enemies with a single blast or a well-timed Spore Slumber combo, but still feel like you have to shrink yourself afterward.

“You and I could wipe out a battlefield in under a minute,” he says, staring ahead. “But we’re still scared of what people would think.” You nod. Because power isn’t the problem — being seen as a monster is.

"what's it like?"

Mark’s always asking about your planet, about how your people see emotions, how they fight, how they love. You tell him about the way your people use spores to communicate joy, or how your instincts sometimes push you to protect before you think. He listens like it’s sacred.

And you? You’re fascinated by Earth culture — the chaos, the complexity, the food. You once asked Mark why humans cry when they’re happy. He didn’t have an answer, but he cried when you used your ult to save his entire team from a sure death. So maybe that’s why.

----------------------

You’re the anchor to his fire. He dives in head-first, and you’re always behind him — healing, buffing, stunning the enemy he missed in his rage. Your synergy is unreal. He trusts your timing more than his own sometimes.

And when he gets knocked down? Soul Resurgence goes off and suddenly nobody’s dying today. Mark calls you his guardian angel without a trace of irony.

Mark picks you up, a lot.

Not because you need him to — you're more than capable. But he likes it. The little smile he gets when he bridal-carries you out of an exploding building or mid-fight? That’s for him. And you let him, because his heartbeat steadies when he holds you close. (You’ve also done the same for him — flying him out while channeling your aura so his wounds can start healing before you even land.)

There are days Mark shuts down. The kind where even breathing feels heavy. You don’t push him to talk — you just sit next to him, radiating calm energy. Maybe you hand him a flower — just a little Healing Flower to settle the ache.

He always says thank you, even if it’s barely a whisper. And you feel it in your chest — he’s starting to believe he deserves peace.

Mark insists on training with you more often — “Your timing’s insane,” he says. “I need to learn how you fight.” You show him how to bait enemies into your Spore Slumber traps, how to use his own speed with your support in mind.

It usually ends with him slipping on one of your spores and you pinning him with a vine-thorn blast, laughing as he yelps in surprise.

He always insists he let you win. You never correct him.

One time you accidentally hit him with a Spore Slumber at the tail end of a battle when he darted into your line of fire. He fell asleep mid-air and you had to catch him in your arms.

Now it’s a running joke. “You gonna knock me out again, or are we good?” (Secretly, he loved how peaceful he felt in that half-second of dreamspace you accidentally gave him.)

You’re empathetic to your core, and Mark struggles with when mercy becomes dangerous. You talk about it — debate it late into the night. He tells you sometimes he wants to kill certain enemies. You admit you’ve never once felt that urge, but you’ve come close when someone hurt someone you love.

You don’t always agree. But the fact that you listen to each other — without judgment — keeps the bond strong.

There are times Mark tries to shut down completely. After brutal battles, after failures. But you can’t not feel the grief radiating from him like a scream with no voice. And the worst part? He resents you for it sometimes. “I just wanted five minutes without someone reading my goddamn mind,” he snaps. It stings more than any blade. You nod. Quiet. Hurt. But you understand. And you give him that space — even if it tears your heart open to do it.

He was burning himself out. Fighting, fighting, fighting — not for victory, but to drown the guilt. You tried to soothe it with gentle words, subtle aura pulses.

But you can’t heal what he won’t let surface.

One night, he finally collapses — not from wounds, but sheer emotional exhaustion. You carry him back yourself, crying quietly because you knew this would happen. And you couldn’t stop it.

There was a mission. He was overwhelmed. You were right there — so close to popping your ult. But you hesitated. One second. And he almost died. You saved him, barely, but the damage was done. You couldn’t stop replaying it — the way his eyes looked at you, shocked, betrayed. He forgives you. Says it wasn’t your fault. But your powers are built on being in sync. And for a while, that connection? It’s cracked.

You’ve never felt so connected to anyone — not even the Guardians. Not like this. Not like him.

And it terrifies you. Because Mark has already lost so much. And you are so easy to break. You’ve seen it — the way he loses himself when people he loves are threatened.

You’ve seen what happens when he chooses rage.

So you keep your distance sometimes. Not because you don’t want him — but because you don’t want to become another reason he shatters.

Mark blames himself for everything. The people he couldn’t save. The ones he had to kill. His father’s legacy. You tell him none of it was his fault. But your voice can’t compete with the echo of his father’s fists. One night, you catch him staring at his reflection like he doesn’t recognize himself. “I’m starting to look like him.” And you don’t know what to say. So you just sit beside him, silently radiating love and sorrow.

During a chaotic fight, a villain detonates a suppression field that nullifies healing for ten seconds — enough time for a shard to tear through your chest. You hit the ground.

Mark snaps.

He goes feral. Bloodied. Gone.

By the time your passive regen kicks in and your eyes flutter open, the battlefield is silent — and Mark is crouched beside you, shaking.

His hands are stained. His eyes wild.

“I thought I lost you,” he whispers. “I would’ve burned the whole planet for you.”

You don’t tell him how close he came.

After everything — after Omni-Man, after Conquest, after the Viltrumite war — Mark’s hope is threadbare. You still smile. You still protect. You still say things like “Evil is a rejection of life.” He envies you. And it breaks him. “Don’t you ever get tired of trying to see the good in people?” he asks one night. You look at him, wounded. And say, “Yes. But I love them anyway. I love you anyway.” He can’t look at you after that.

You’ve been holding it all in — his pain, the weight of being the emotional anchor, the guilt of not saving everyone, the fear of losing him.

And one day, something small breaks the dam. Maybe he brushes you off too casually. Maybe he says he doesn’t need you.

And you explode.

“Then why do I feel it, Mark?! Why do I feel you drowning every time I’m near you?!”

The silence after is suffocating. You don’t cry. Not then.

But he does.

It’s a quiet horror in the back of your mind. Mark will live for thousands of years. You won’t. Not unless something changes. You’ve never said it out loud. But every time he looks at you like you’re his forever, something inside you aches. Because one day, his heart will still beat while yours is gone. And you hope, desperately, that you’ll leave behind something good in him. Something gentle.

There’s a moment — the worst one yet. A mission gone wrong. An enemy threatens you directly.

And Mark snaps so completely, you don’t recognize him. His eyes are blood-red. His punches don’t stop.

You’re the only one who can reach him.

You step into his path, even as he trembles.

“I’m here,” you say. “I’m still here.”

And when he finally breaks, sobbing into your arms — all you can do is hold him.

And hope your love is strong enough to bring him back

After one of Mark’s darker days, when you find him curled up and quiet, you don’t try to talk him out of it. You just lay beside him. Slowly wrap your arms around him. Let your aura spill into the space — not overwhelming, just warmth. You say nothing. Just: “I’m not going anywhere.” He holds you tighter than he ever has.

#mark grayson x y/n #mark grayson x you #mark grayson x reader #invincible mark grayson #mark grayson #invincible x reader #invincible x y/n #invincible x you

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revelboo · 7 months ago

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I love Everything Is Alright sm and GOD i feel so bad for Megatron in such a specific way. Imagine you're in charge of a group of astronauts and they keep running off to go fuck the alien fauna, like bestie I'd be losing my shit too.

That’s pretty much what’s going on. 🤣 Poor guy is having a breakdown over all of his followers being deviants. I feel almost bad about how much fun I’m having in traumatizing Megatron- I swear I really do like him. I just also love making it worse. 18+ content

Everything Is Alright Pt 92

IDW Starscream x Reader, Soundwave x Reader, Megatron x Reader

• Choosing to ignore the furious Seeker, Megatron turns his attention to Soundwave and curls a lip. “For Primus’s sake, cover yourself,” he growls. Hand lifting to run over his face, he gestures at Starscream. Hears the Seeker actually hiss at him, wings flared and he ignores that, too. “That isn’t a pet.” Or maybe you are. A pet they frag. It’s not like this mess can get any worse. “Are both of you bonded to it?”

• It?! Spike still buried inside you, he’s aware of your little hands clinging to him. Of your fear and the way the bond amplifies it. “Keep away from my sparkmate,” he snarls. Stiffening as Megatron turns his stare on him, those cruel optics narrowing in calculation. Trying to figure out how to use you against him. To hurt him. Spark aching when you hide your face against his neck. Painfully aware of how fragile you are and that his frame is all that’s shielding you from Megatron’s anger. So it’s a surprise when Soundwave stands and moves between him and Megatron.

• “My sparkmate,” Soundwave says, hating the lie even as he makes the claim. Knows it’s necessary, though. Because if you only belong to Starscream, you’re as expendable as he is. Aware of Megatron’s dislike for the Seeker and that it isn’t wholly unwarranted. Starscream’s deliberately invoked his wrath so many times with so many plots and schemes. So Soundwave lies to keep you safe. And because he wants that, wants to keep you, hold you in his arms. If keeping the self destructive SIC on a leash is the cost, he’s willing to pay it for you.

• Why does it have to be like this? Holding onto Starscream as Soundwave lies to their leader, you just wish suddenly there was somewhere you could run away to with them both. Just the three of you. But you know how incredibly selfish the thought is as soon as you have it. To ask them to leave everything they know just for you? Star’s spark is still connected to you, tendrils of energy snaring you like he’s trying to hold onto you despite the threat looming over him. The feel of him wrapped around you helping calm the terror, because in his arms you want to believe it’ll be okay as foolish as it is. That feeling of safety singing through you despite the danger.

• “Of course, it is,” Megatron mutters. Two of his commanding officers both sparkbonded to an organic alien. The same alien. Why not? It’s not an epidemic of xenophilia, it’s an epidemic of insanity. “I understand having impulses, but this?” Sees Soundwave stiffen slightly as he gestures at Starscream and the human. His communications officer at least having the decency to look slightly embarrassed about it, the Seeker still glaring and defiant. “You understand that just because you’re fragging it, doesn’t mean it changes anything. You’ll bring me the… pet before reporting to your duties.” And he can try to figure out what you’ve done to both of them. Some sort of pheromones? The interfacing can’t just be that good. So, it must be something you’re doing- some strange human mind control making his Decepticons all crazy. And Shockwave can figure it out since Hook is also compromised now.

• “You think I’m going to hand over my mate?” Starscream snarls, ignoring the warning look Soundwave shoots him. So furious he’s shaking as Megatron stares him down. Not again. Please. He can’t just give you to that sadist. Before Megatron had only thought you were a pet, but now that he knows you matter? Knows what you are to him? Tries to lift up, intending to fight and you cling to him. Hook a leg over his hip. Hears your frightened, little ‘don’t, please’ and his spark hurts with it. Because he’s still connected to you, can feel that fear isn’t for yourself it’s for him. And it tears through him, the unfairness of all of it. That he can’t just have this one thing, the only thing that really matters. “You’re not invincible,” he growls at Megatron, not caring if the warlord hears the threat there. Because to protect his mate? He’ll burn the world down around him.

#transformers x reader #starscream x reader #idw starscream #megatron x reader #soundwave x reader #idw soundwave #idw megatron

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tiredfoxtf · 7 months ago

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I hope some people remember this au, because there's a time for some madman explanation.

Besides the great Equilibrium, that is the player realm, there are two other realms that are inaccessible to normal players. The Infinite Sea of Stars and Bottomless Depths of Abyss are antipodes in every way. If The Infinite Sea of Stars is a hot full of movement and bright light, then The Bottomless Depths of Abyss is cold, stagnant and pitch black dark. The average player can only look into illusions of them in the Equilibrium, like layered glass the sky protects players from full brightness of the Infinite Sea of Stars and madness of the Bottomless Depths of Abyss whenever they look into the night sky or the void.

But Abyss seers and Stargazers are special. Stargazers often described as "ones who stretches their gaze into the sea of stars where destinies intertwine", their ability to take a look into the realm of Stars and read fates that were written there is unique to them and them only. People think of them as prophets, but they are really just historians, because no destiny is written beforehand in it's entirety. A star can die, a new star will be born, a new constellation will take shape and the other will fall apart. This is why players are the strongest beings, because they were granted an Active Choice, a way to re-write a destiny. Abyss seers however, don't get this nice of a treatment, their ability to take a look at the mysteries of this world, to see and communicate with creatures of the Abyss in a way that won't drive them mad is taken more often as a curse. Some people believe that Abyss Seers don't have the ability to see the world around them, because it's the only true payment for the Abyssal knowledge. But it isn't true, they can see, and they do see the Sun and the Moon above them, but not even the illusion of the Sea of Stars. The night sky on the new moon isn't that different from darkest places of the abyss.

Despite representing two polar opposites both stargazers and abyss seers share unique loneliness in this Universe. Despite being players, some part of their code is tightly connected to realm they are also alien to, they know they can't belong in any world they are in, so they find usually a strange comfort in other's existence.

Which is totally different from what angels (a shadow of the star) and demon (reflection of the abyss) have going on, but that will need it's own post, this one is already ridiculously long.

#> tired fanart #wacky creatures au #jimmy solidarity #grian #how do we feel about jimmy redesign because oh my universe he finally looks like himself to me #also yes that definitely means that the only stars jimmy ever saw is the one that are create grian #u are welcome to that fact

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i-dont-know-how-this-site-works · 1 month ago

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All Star Wars references in "The Enigma of the High Visionary" explained:

Since some people asked for it/were posting that they didn't get the references, here it is explained by a SW fan: 1. "Your child, his vision count is off the charts. I've never sensed a power like it." So, in the SW universe, there is this mysthical entity called The Force, that allows you to do some cool ass shit and some people cannot commune with The Force at all, some are Force Sensitive and possess the ability to tune into it and use it and some individuals are very Force Sensitive and very strong in the Force. In Episode I, The Phantom Menace, two Jedi knights discover a slave boy on the remote planet of Tatooine and they test his abilites/blood for this thing called a "midichlorian count" (which existance was highly devisive in the fandom), which is basically like a benchmark score for how sensitive you are to the Force. This boy, called Anakin Skywalker, had an insane midichlorian count and was basically the strongest known Force user in the galaxy. Also, there is this line of dialogue in TPM:

2. "How many vision-chlorians did you measure?" A pun on the midichlorian-measuring thing.

3. "It was higher than the Grand Visionary's." In the movies the two Jedis from the gif above comment on how this child's midichlorian count is higher that the count of Yoda, who was one of the most powerful Force Users at the time and the spiritual leader of the Jedi Order.

4. "He must join us. He will join us." So, in Episode V, Empire Strikes Back, we learn that Darth Vader is the biological father of Luke Skywalker (sorry for the 45 year old spoilers!) and he tries to convince his son to join the Dark Side (i.e., the bad guys) and be Evil Together. He goes to great lenghts to convince his son to join him, as Darth Vader's boss would most likely kill Luke if he didn't prove himself as useful to him/Vader.

5. "I am a high-functioning dad" Not really a SW reference, but Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader was an absolutely shitty father. 5. "- At the council? - The Council have been blinded for too long. They don't recognise me. The granted me the... the rank of Vision Knight, but they don't let me sit upon the Council!" In Episode III, Revenge of the Sith, Anakin Skywalker gets a seat on the Jedi Council (the highest governing body of the Jedi Order), but is denied a promotion to the rank of Jedi Master. This makes him blow up and leads to this scene that has been so memed to death I can quote that shit in my sleep:

youtube

6. "Not just the men, but the women, and the children too." A direct quote copied from Episode II, Attack of the Clones, when Anakin murdered a bunch of people and told his crush about it.

7. "I thought we could watch your favourite film, The Phantom Menace." A lot of people thought this movie was absolute garbage (Sam included).

8. "I would love to watch The Phantom Menace, the best Star Wars movie." Sam hates it. 9. "happy-J" AJ loves it. 10. "I like how that alien sounds offensively Japanese.", "That looks a bit anti-semitic.", "Sure, that will age well." Some of the aliens in the prequels seem like thinly veiled stereotypes of some racial/ethnic groups, sometimes bordering on offensive. 11. Sam screaming "whooo waaaa bumballa" or something is him humming this song (which is a banger, just listen to this shit)

youtube

12. If you have watched the above clip to the very end, you will notice one of the Jedis got killed. This is what Sam references when he says "Liam Neeson just died."' 13. When Sam does the motorbike hands and engine noises, it's a reference to pod racing, which is basically the equivalent of motorbike racing.

youtube

14. "Meesa called Jar Jar Binks. Meesa Gungan." "That seems racist." In Episodes I and II there is this character called Jar Jar Binks, who is widely accepted to be the worst character in the history of cinema. He is also somewhat a Jamaican stereotype. 15. "I feel a presence." Force users can sense other Force users when they appear in a non-defined radius away from the user. The more familiar/stronger the Force user, the easier it is to pick up on their presence. 16. When Thomas Senior shows Thomas Junior to the High Visionary, it looks like the scene from Episode VII, The Return of the Jedi, when Darth Vader presents his son, Luke Skywalker, to his boss, Emperor Palpatine. Luke refuses to work with the Emperor, to the Emperor tries to kill him. Darth Vader then has a change of heart and saves his son by killing the Emperor. If I missed any, do let me know! (at the request of @shootfromthehipobsessed)

#shoot from the hip #sfth #star wars #the enigma of the high visionary #Youtube

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black-lake · 1 year ago

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astro observations 12

heyy here are some of the things i found out lately while i was wasting time

——

🎠 An aries moon and capricorn sun man, I always find this mix intriguing. Can give off the vibes of a character straight out of a webtoon, or a fuck boy that’s just visibly toxic. Either way I find them so incredibly magnetic. They possess strong fiery auras and usually have a rebellious streak to them. If they act out of their shadows they can be arrogant, insensitive, disloyal and only chase after the physical.

🎠 Initially I wondered why eminem doesn’t give me libra sun vibes at all, then I looked a bit deeper into his chart and realized that he’s just textbook uranian, he even looks like an alien and acts like one at times. He got sun conjunct uranus, aquarius moon, mars conjunct uranus, and uranus square nn. He was born to be a rebel.

🎠 He’s one of greatest rappers to exist and it’s worthy to mention some of the aspects that indicate his unique talent for rapping. First of all mars conj uranus is known to give unique talents, so that’s that. In this case sun and mars conj uranus granting him a natural rhythm, quick thinking, and unique expression. But the supersonic speed doesn’t come just from that. What’s interesting is that his ability to be a fast rapper and master lyricist is amplified by pluto also being in libra, conjunct his mars and pallas, fueling him with anger, intensifying his capabilities with determination, and heightened mental control and intelligence. Saturn is also in an air sign (gemini), indicating speed and intelligence. This gives rise to a grand air trine, linking his powerful stellium of sun, mars, uranus, pluto, and pallas in libra, his moon in aquarius, and saturn in gemini. The stars really aligned there making him the rap god huh.

🎠 If you know eminem's story you'd know that he had a tough upbringing. From a difficult mother and absent father to being an outcast bouncing between schools and sketchy neighbourhoods, the only white kid in a black community, being bullied by gangs, and even beaten up till he drifted out of consciousness, then dropped out of school. Makes me think it's why he keeps his bodyguards with him all the time! He was left with nothing and a daughter to provide for, encountered racial prejudice in rap contests for being white, despite these obstacles, he rose to become the best-selling hip-hop artist and earned recognition from rappers as one of the greatest of all time. Leads me to the next obs.

🎠 Heavy uranus/aquarius or 11°, 23° can easily become misfits without trying to. They’re constantly put in new environments, places where they’re the only ones of their kind, like a white kid in a black community, a foreign in a mostly local area, the new kid in school. There’s always ‘something different about them’ that people pick up on even if it was as early as elementary school. Which may get them outcasted or bullied. Their experiences at times lead them to hate school and drop out.

🎠 People with these placements have something special to offer the world. It may seem like obstacles are constantly put in their way without them doing anything, but it’s their path unfolding. So they can wake up from their conditioned states and break from the status quo. The more that happens the more they realize who they are.

🎠 Here’s why I think those that got capricorn north node can be the best fathers or the child’s favorite parent. It’s part of their destiny to be a caregiver and a good example for their children and they have the biggest hearts when it comes to caring for them and protecting them. They desire to give their child what they themselves may have lacked in their youth and shield them from the pain they experienced. Their child is their inspiration and reason to keep going in a way.

🎠 The biggest two examples I can give, Eminem singing mockingbird (one of my favs) for his daughter Hailie. He often mentions her in award shows, and did a whole diss track (killshot), in 13 minutes btw lmao, just because MGK made a tweet about his daughter. The other example is Travis Scott singing goosebumps for his daughter Stormi on stage and bringing her to his concerts. She has always said that her fav parent is her dad. Anyway, don’t mess with these ppl’s kids they’ll go after you to the end of the world.

🎠 Men with mercury conjunct saturn have deeper voices, speak slowly and eloquently like they’re a 50 year old even if they’re 25. They are very grounded, have a methodical way of thinking and are wise beyond their years. Also masters at dodging questions.

🎠 I’ve seen it a lot and experienced it myself having an aries stellium. Women with a lot of aries or mars placements can often feel like they’re more cute, youthful and sexy in a cool way rather than the typical feminine way. They often have toned bodies, smaller chests and a lot of masculine qualities that trying to appear too feminine can feel fake to them.

🎠 People with north node in capricorn can feel like they've been robbed of the success they deserve. It's giving the vibe of a musician that has worked so damn hard on their album and received public success but no official awards, then released another album and did it again and again and still haven’t gotten a grammy. I mean grammys are scams but ykwim. Along the lessons of success and accomplishment, there's also a profound lesson in patience and self-validation, a focus on recognizing one's worth from within rather than seeking external validation.

🎠 I noticed that aries, gemini, aquarius and capricorn placements or heavy mars, mercury, uranus and saturn can prefer skirts over dresses or just wear pants all the time.

🎠 Those with uranus-neptune in pisces really brought back the love for anime, manga, webtoons, cosplay, colourful cute aesthetics, dreamcore, surrealist aesthetics and art. They just got a dreamland vibe to them and it’s quite fascinating to see.

🎠 I have north node in leo and I'm starting to look like my 5 year old self, no joke, connecting to your inner child can do that. Looking at my childhood photos stirs up emotions within me. I often find myself reminiscing and yearning for that carefree time when I was simply myself, devoid of societal pressures. Plus, I can't help but notice after fixing my fucked up teeth I got my child smile back. I feel like I'm in a journey of rediscovery as I start to recognize that childlike spirit within me once again.

🎠 Those with sagittarius, libra, taurus, gemini, leo and aries placements have the most beautiful smiles omg, like it does something to your heart. Please keep smiling it really brightens up this world. I mean I can fit all the signs here I just love when others smile. 🥺

🎠 Mercury opposite pluto, these native can say exactly what would get them mocked or bullied. They keep starting the wrong fights for the wrong reasons. They could get triggered of people who communicate better than them. Their lesson lies in improving their communication skills, cultivating tactfulness and diplomacy, and learning to reclaim their power in a psychological manner rather than resorting to mindless verbal confrontations.

🎠 Mars conj/opp pluto can at times experience violence early on, in school or their neighborhood. They experience a lot of obstacles constantly, inner and outer pressures that they may feel like giving up. These challenges ultimately instill within them greater resilience and determination to pursue their goals. Many martial artists and athletes have this aspect, seeking an outlet to channel the intense anger they experience.

🎠 People with aries north node really go from one battle to another without a break. Leaving behind their need to compromise and avoid confrontations can be challenging but is the very thing that brings those battles. Eventually they will find themselves needing to defend themselves alone with no support, fighting back relentlessly no matter what and stop compromising to keep the peace. They will gain this sense of self assurance and bravery to face anything in life.

🎠 I know someone with a lot of saturn oppositions, aquarius sun and stellium opposite saturn, capricorn moon and aries nn. This person has always been underestimated by their parents and always felt like an outsider. They had controlling parents that imposed so many restrictions on them. They also were targeted in school for having a funny and likable personality. Being their aquarius mc and aries mercury bestie I saw their potential and encouraged them to fight back even if it meant making a scene. They eventually built up the courage to stand up for themselves no matter how alone they are. But they also have this wisdom to know when to pick their battles and when to ignore things and let them go, which I look up to.

🎠 People with a lot of chiron conjunctions or oppositions have a heart of gold. Real angels on earth that have been through it. They have so much compassion and understanding for others because they’ve been hurt in many ways. They know what it feels like to be wounded by life and have tremendous amounts of empathy for that. They have sensitive souls and their presence alone can make others feel seen and heard. I appreciate these people a lot, like thank u for existing.

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absolute1999 · 1 month ago

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90s goth musician intro ★ POST - MORTEM

☥ find me , in the dark. ☥

You perk your ears, straining to hear past the immutable chatter that seems to engulf your entire being. Beyond each alcohol ridden voice is a sound. This sound is different, unique, one you’ve never heard before, and it’s music. Music so enchanting…above this dingy bar?

Are you willing to take a closer listen..?

POST - MORTEM, formed in a small town, Mortem was initially a black metal project dedicated to venting emotions that came with everyday life. While black metal (dsbm) remain a core principle to the foundation of Mortem, as we matured our music matured along with us. The core / founding members of Mortem are VINCENT CRAVEN, JESSE VASQUEZ, and DEX ORTIZ.

What is Mortem? As it stands, Mortem is described as a “dark-wave band merging ethereal low vocals, mystifying lyrics, and occult metal sensibilities.” It is not uncommon to find riffs more likely to be heard on a MORTUARY DRAPE album across our discography. Still, our music is commonly played in goth nights around the world! More aptly, by me when I’m DJ-ing. buy our fucking album.

INSPIRATIONS? “We listen to a shit ton of music. Me and Jess first listened to RIDE THE LIGHTNING together in high school before delving into blacker metal. That’s where Mortem was formed. Old lo-fi bm cassettes were handed out to friends and people at shows. Initially we didn’t have a drummer — those shitty demos led us straight to Dex. From there, we spent too much time loitering our local record store. . Today, I’d say Mortem is most inspired by bands like THE CURE, SAD LOVERS & GIANTS, THRILL KILL KULT, SISTERS OF MERCY, ALIEN SEX FIEND. . All of the cool shit coming out right now. THE LOVED ONE by STRANGE BOUTIQUE was released not that long ago too. Good album, really good album. Heavily influential on us.”

SUCCESS? “We’re pretty entrenched in our local scene back home. Working on getting new stuff out, and while the stuff that is out sells alright, I wouldn’t call our music widely successful, and that’s fine. It would be interesting—but I don’t think we want that life, we like the community that comes with playing locally. I do want to play with some of the bands that are bigger than us though. Hopefully we get that chance.”

♰ the founders ♰

★ Vincent, Vince, Vin, Vinnie, Vincenzo, Vicente, the list goes on. Lead singer & guitarist. I am me, who are YOU?

★ Jesse Vasquez. Bassist & backing vocals. Cool guy, incredible bassist. We’ve been best friends since childhood — guy I made shitty black metal demos with. We work @ MOD ROCk together. He enjoys accosting innocent customers with outlandish death metal albums, an admittedly fun past time for both of us. Outgoing in every sense of the word, also loud. Very, very fucking loud..

★ Dex Ortiz. Drummer & backing vocals. Similarly as outgoing as Jess, great at drums & making pieces of clothing out of anything. We grew up in the same neighborhood and went to the same schools. Never started talking until high school though (reference black metal demo incident). I do not know how she puts up with me and Jess, and I truly don’t think she knows either. Also works @ MOD ROCk ! Often found starring longingly at any subculture-adjacent girl who enters the store.

♡ T. Not a member of Mortem but my boyfriend and our manager! Originally a frequenter of our lives, he was dragged to one of our shows on a whim. Despite not being interested in the music before; he came back again, then again, then again. . He never intended to manage us, but after seeing how we were handling Mortem it just happened—and we allowed it to.

est. 1991 , “ i’m not an effigy. ”

#yayyyyyyyy my yapfest #masterlist next i think #☆ intro #neverland — 90sgoth #band dr #shiftblr #reality shifting #shifting blog #shifting motivation #shifting community

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theresattrpgforthat · 1 year ago

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Hello!! Do you know any TTRPGs surrounding translation or languages? 😊 (thanks for all your work btw!!!)

THEME: Language / Translation Games

Hello friend! As someone who studied linguistics in university, I absolutely love talking about all of the funky things languages do! I hope these recommendations tickle your fancy!

Dialect, by Thorny Games.

Dialect is a game about an isolated community, their language, and what it means for that language to be lost. In this game, you’ll tell the story of the Isolation by building their language. New words will come from the fundamental aspects of the community: who they are, what they believe in, and how they respond to a changing world.

Dialect uses a deck of cards to help minimize the amount of choices you have to make in character creation, by dealing three cards to each player and having the players choose one from just those three. You track the change of your language over a series of turns, using prompts to help you navigate the conversations that arise in your community as the world around them changes.

Dialect has been very highly regarded as a game that really delivers on the experience that it promises. The grief that accompanies language death really shines through this game, so if you want to combine the wonder of creation with the pain of losing something so integral to your sense of being, this is the game for you.

Tiny Frog Wizards, by @prokopetz

You have mastered the secret arts of sorcery

The very primordial energies of creation and destruction are yours to wield as you will.

You are two inches tall.

Tiny Frog Wizards is a game about tiny frogs, wielding magic using the power of words. When you want to do something magical, you will roll somewhere between 1-3 dice, and use the values of your rolled dice to determine how the range, magnitude, and control of your magic.

What’s important in terms of this game recommendation is the Control aspect, because how well you are able to wield your magic depends on how many words you are able to use to make things happen! It’s a lot easier to use a spell with precision if you have enough words to detail where you want a magical pen to write, or what you want to throw a tiny magic missile at. Not enough words? Then the GM has license to cause some humorous side effects, or, if you roll poorly enough, cause your spells to really go off the rails.

If you like games where you need to choose your words carefully, Tiny Frog Wizards is worth checking out - especially since it’s in free playtest!

Xenolanguage, by Thorny Games.

Xenolanguage is a tabletop role-playing game about first contact with alien life, messy human relationships and what happens when they mix together. At its core, you explore your pivotal relationships with others on the mission as you uncover meaning in an alien language. The game gives a nod to soulful sci-fi media like Arrival, Story of Your Life and Contact, but tells its own story. It’s a game for 2-4 players in 3-4 hours.

In Xenolangauge, you play as a group of people bound together through a shared past with unsettled questions. Your task is to understand why the aliens have come and what they are trying to tell us. You will soon discover the key to understanding lies in your memories together.

This is definitely an in-person game, as it is meant to come with a modular channeling board that will provide you with alien symbols that you will use to help you interpret messages. This is more than a game about language, it’s about relationship, shared memories, and connection.

Xenolanguage was kickstarted at the beginning of this year, but you can check out the above link to pre-order the game if this sounds interesting to you!

Star-Spawned, by Penguin King Games.

One unearthly night, a ray of colourless light descended from the stars, and under its warping radiance, creatures unlike any the world has ever seen were born. They do not know the world, and they do not know themselves. Unfortunately for the world, they're quick learners!

Star-Spawned is a GMless, oneshot-oriented tabletop RPG in which you don't know what your own traits do when play begins. The names of each group's stats are randomly generated using morpheme chaining, and characters are created while having absolutely no idea what they mean; figuring that out forms the greater part of play.

Star-Spawned is more about self discovery than it is about language, but the use of morpheme-chaining in character creation is intriguing to me. You will randomly roll three pieces of a word, and then chain them together to create a unique Facet, available to the players as stats. These Facets don’t have a meaning when the game begins - you need to play to find out what they mean. If you like playing around with semantics - the meaning of words - this might be a game for you.

Degenerate Semantics, by Mikael Andersson.

Degenerate Semantics is a role-playing game for 1-5 players and one Game Master (GM). The players will each portray a character who live in Emmaloopen's poverty-stricken lower city. They are young, wild, ambitious, and independent. This way of life is threatened by other factions, and the players will need to have their characters work together to survive and thrive.

In the process of playing the game, the players and GM will define and flesh out a language called Bandethal. A collection of street terms and slang, Bandethal is used both as a way to talk openly about illicit activities without alerting authorities and to establish street cred. The terms are liberally mixed in with plain English, or when the language is mature enough, can be used entirely on its own. The characters' success is in large part based on how proficiently the players wield the language.

A friend of mine ran this game for me three or four years ago, and it’s been sitting in the back of my head ever since. Degenerate Semantics was created for a Game Chef competition in 2014, and has remained in the same state since then. I don’t think there’s any more work being done on it, but the game is there for anyone who wants to give it a go - and while there’s a setting that comes with the game, that setting is highly flexible, depending on what your group is interested in. Our group decided to use a lot of gardening metaphors, and undertook a plant-based heist as our act of rebellion! If you want a game about the power that language can give a tightly-knit group, this is the game for you.

I've Also Recommended...

DROWWORD, by Ursidice.

#tabletop games #indie ttrpgs #game recommendations #dnd #asks #languages

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jesncin · 9 months ago

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A Queer and Asian review of Xanthe Zhou + Spirit World

I haven't exactly been thorough about how I specifically feel about Xanthe Zhou as "representation" for people like me and a part of me didn't want to be too harsh since they're a fan favorite and I'm sure the writer did their best and what not- but there is this sense of "I'm not even whelmed I'm underwhelmed" by Xanthe as a character. I don't dislike them, but I can't say I'm a fan if I don't find them particularly interesting.

I'm sure for a lot of people the idea of a Chinese non-binary anime sword wielding, bomber jacket wearing, shaved cut having, envoy between the living and spirit world character is a novel concept. But when you've lived the reality this character attempts to represent (ghosts and spirits are a tuesday where I'm from) and have sought out that representation from within your own communities, Xanthe pales in comparison like a really corporate product. So I want to talk about intersectional storytelling and what a holistic queer Asian superhero could look like.

Again I'm aware Spirit World was written by a queer Chinese author (+ an all Chinese team) and as a fellow author who has to navigate mainstream publishing and deal with attempts at sandpapering authenticity for capitalism I want to stress that I Get The Struggle. But I'm allowed to be critical of how the final product turned out. Some of this is subjective musing even.

Here's the premise of Xanthe Zhou's character: When Xanthe was a very tiny kid, they were run over by a car when they were walking alone at night in the rain. They're resurrected by a powerful spirit called Po Po to be the half-dead, half-living Envoy of the Spirit World.

Everything about Xanthe is exhaustively corporate for me. Like industry planted representation designed to be as safe as possible and attempts at being intersectional are limited. Spirit World features Cassandra Cain Batgirl and John Constantine Hellblazer because that's how we get Asian and queer DC fans to hop onto out new queer Asian character! Xanthe doesn't get to stand out in their own world, or have an established cast system the way Kong Kenan gets to. Spirit World suffers from being a follow up to an Event comic, with all these characters crossing over- but it didn't rise to the challenge of including Batgirl and Johnstantine in meaningful ways. The story would've been better if they were replaced by characters unique to Xanthe's cast system.

I've become pretty cynical about scenes like this one. It's a scene where Xanthe is forcefully invited to have dinner with their family they haven't seen in years. The transphobic dinner pages made rounds on social media because "ooh look at John Constantine gendering a non-binary person correctly even when Xanthe's family keeps misgendering them", and "whoa even the magic system respects a trans person's name". It's free marketing, you can see comments on these posts asking what comic this is from to read more. People will start discourse over "Constantine going woke" and the defenders will pull up receipts that "John has always been a lefitst" and so on and so forth. I saw the promos for Spirit World, but these panels were what piqued my interest early on.

My twin and I were taking turns reading Spirit World- Jes asked Cin (who finished reading first) "so what about that transphobic dinner scene? Was it there? Are there other scenes that talk about it?" and Cin said "nope that's it. The rest is magic fight scenes and spirit world stuff." And honestly that feels calculated. It's like that Jenny Nicholson Star Wars Hotel thing: "whoa if they have this droid and this animatronic alien performer, imagine what else they have!" but nope. That's it. Just enough to fit in a tik tok promo. Just enough to fit in a tweet and make rounds. It's not like Alan Scott's Green Lantern solo, where his queer identity isn't limited to one scene designed to go viral. The whole narrative holistically discussed what it was like to be a gay man in that era. Spirit World on the other hand felt like it had a representation quota to fulfill before moving on to the generic Superhero Stuff- an entirely separate plot.

Then there's Xanthe and John. As a Hellblazer purist I already knew this was going to be a hard read for me since I'm not a fan of DC!Constantine but I've talked before about how Spirit World still has that appeal for me because sometimes og Hellblazer is a pain to read as a person of color. Maybe I can enjoy the fantasy of Constantine being an ally to an Asian person instead of fetishizing them like he did in those old Vertigo comics (people love to leave that out when they're defending Constantine as an ally but whatever). And people kept talking about how this is an elder and younger queer friendship dynamic and I love those.

So where was that? Sure, John genders Xanthe correctly over transphobic dinner and comforts them afterwards. But nothing he says or does is specific to a queer elder. Any ally or character can say these things or do these gestures. He doesn't speak from personal experience about how "it gets better" or "I know what it's like" it's just. "yeah throwing up in Gotham is great I do it all the time". Excuse me if I don't think that's substantial.

Ooh but the ghost of Johnstantine's ex boyfriend Oliver showed up! And then there was a bi joke about how John hooks up with a clone of himself a "dozen times" because he's such a slut amirite, gays. Diversity win. I expected bi jokes from DC!Constantine but marketing this as a queer narrative or generational friendship is a stretch.

Spirit World would've been a more holistic queer narrative if Wan Yujing, the villainous corrupted spirit that wanted to be remembered properly (or reincarnated, depends on the writer's mood)-was revealed to be a queer person. This would've been a fantastic opportunity to recontextualize Xanthe's personal transphobic encounter with their family into a larger systemic theme of queer historical erasure. The original meaning of a "dead name" is the idea that when a trans person dies, their family will put the wrong name on their grave. It's literally their "dead" name, erasing their legacy in writing. So why not include that in your conflict?

Wan Yujing is revealed to be a famous poet, slowly forgotten because "time erodes everything" (vague and bad writing btw). Why not pitch something more motivated and specific? Make it so that she wrote queer literature that was destroyed. Make it so that her lover was rewritten in history books as her "friend". Then when Xanthe makes the promise to remember Wan Yujing as she truly was, it'd be a holistic act of queer recognition and solidarity. But instead the resolution is just Xanthe Zhou promising "hey I'll remember you" and Wan Yujing just takes their word for it.

Can we talk about the huge missed opportunity of what this dialogue implies? Xanthe proclaims that they are both living and dead, granted the living's power to remember and the dead's immortality. Why was this not thematically paired with their experience as a non-binary person struggling in a cis-heteronormative world. Heck, why not pair this with how they're a queer Asian American, a perpetual foreigner wherever they go? Not Asian enough for traditional spaces, but not white enough for a majority of queer American spaces. Are we worried we'll scare off the white audience if this got too intersectional?

Xanthe gets more fleshed out under a different writer (Jeremy Holt) for one of the DC Pride stories (2023). Here, Xanthe talks about how being in the land of the living feels like going about a routinic obligation; "Reminding me that home isn't necessarily where the heart is". This is so much like the disassociated way trans people go about life before figuring themselves out. It's also like how a perpetual foreigner doesn't fit in anywhere. But it's not paralleled to that experience. The fantasy aspects of Xanthe Zhou the Envoy, are completely separate from the very few personal civilian parts of them. Like they're a Superhero first and a person second. The later half of this story gets overtaken by a team up with Batwoman, because once you have a new character set in Gotham you are at the whims of being absorbed into the greater Batfam conglomerate.

There's interesting concepts at the center of Xanthe's character. But it's hard to give credit to writing that doesn't follow any of that through. Xanthe's a hero motivated by making sure the dead are remembered and respected. That's a decent motivation in general, and a pretty resonant one for a queer hero-but everything surrounding the execution of that idea feels so half-assed to me. Xanthe's origin story has so many plot holes, it feels like it was thought up in 5 minutes.

Why was their death just some random car accident and not something more motivated? Why did the all powerful Po Po decide to resurrect them specifically? Where's the tension in any of the many excessive fight scenes in Spirit World, if Xanthe's apparently immortal? Also they age? What are the stakes for a character like this? This isn't even covering the shoddy writing for their transphobic family drama (Why did they just stalk their family after being resurrected? Why did their mom recognize them even though they've been gone and have aged for 15 years? so many questions ugh).

(why was this toddler walking around alone in the rain with their own umbrella. In Gotham. What is this-)

I casually propose that instead have Xanthe's origin be that they died as a runaway trans teen who went missing and was murdered. Maybe because the way police and society in general don't look into the disappearances of trans poc, Xanthe's death went completely unnoticed. Maybe as Xanthe's dying, Po Po sees their determination to fight for the forgotten and chooses to resurrect this kid specifically. Then we'd have a really motivated origin story that ties their identity to their heroism. Instead we get these over the top fantasy concepts + transphobic dinner with my talisman wielding mom.

Spirit World is a fun enough action fantasy with troubled pacing and generic MCU-quippy dialogue. It's so overwhelmed by it's own spectacle that we don't get a chance to get to know our new hero. What is Xanthe's character development? What flaw do they grow out of or overcome? If I'm honest outside of the attempt at quippy banter, what even is their personality? The ending is rushed; not only is the conflict resolved with Xanthe just promising to remember a dead poet, but they also make a deal to work with the Spirit World authorities. Because it's always so fun to watch queer people assimilate to the powers that oppress.

In one of these action sequences, I guess the writer decided there needed to be a semblance of themes to make it feel like the readers' time isn't being wasted. So while Cassandra Cain Batgirl from Detective Comics and John Constantine from Vertigo Hellblazer are holding the giant anime sword, Xanthe goes on an internal monologue about how change is natural and people's fears make them resistant towards it. Xanthe says that to embrace magic, "you need to look at everything you think you know about the way the world should be...and imagine something new."

It's a nice sentiment that isn't reinforced by anything else in the story, but it does make me think. What is "new" about Xanthe Zhou to someone like me who seeks out representation like this? I've seen queer characters with the shaved hairstyle, I've seen queer coded Asian girlies with the bomber jacket, heck I've even seen the giant anime sword. I kinda cringe at seeing "giant spiritual sword" at this point even. But you know what I don't see as often? In real life I've seen the bravest Asian queer people reclaim cultural hairstyles, clothing, practices and beliefs (that originally excluded them). I've seen them join communities and create entire subcultures and lingo in a way that would be unrecognizable to the typical queer readers who enjoy Hellblazer-but I certainly don't see it reflected in fiction a lot.

(Is it really new if I've seen it in a Disney movie)

The premise of a Chinese American non-binary half-dead-half-living Envoy for the dead is something so metaphysical in its intersectionality, world building, stakes and themes that it would require Sandman-levels of out-the-box creativity to pull off. Which is why getting a generic action adventure (+ one scene about transphobic dinner with the family) feels so disappointing. I wish Spirit World took its own words to heart; I wish it took everything we're used to, everything we've known about how the world is and dare to imagine something actually new.

#ramblings #jesncin dc meta #xanthe zhou #I'm not at all a hater btw- there's good and “eh” things about xanthe and I hope more writers can do them justice #i just need more heart. more specificity. something that resonates beyond the surface level.#this was originally supposed to be a short post but I kept going lol

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