#I just can’t bring myself to finish
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Inktober, Prompt 8: Tarot cards, WIP
#roadstoink23#danny phantom#56thingsart#I don’t have any energy rn#I did this awhile ago#I just can’t bring myself to finish#if I ever do ill post it#probably#anyways#inktober#my wips
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Kind of stupid
#I want to do the whole song but I can’t even bring myself to clean up this one clip#I have more that’s already got key frames. I just lost steam faster than anticipated#someone should force me to finish this at some point. please and thank you#how do you animate fabric? he’s not even fabric#you can tell who I favour just by how I sketch them#prohibitedwish
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my unfinished symphony 🥲
#ever arts#homare arisugawa#i had such high hopes for this piece#i was very excited about it in the beginning and then i just burnt myself out#looking at it still brings joy but working on it on the other hand…#i did take long breaks and yeah just can’t find it in myself to finish it anymore#working on this taught me a lot of things tho 🫡 like patience and working smarter haha#maybe i’ll revisit this one day#but until then we have this unfinished beauty that i dont really mind#just think of this as an unfinished painting found in the attic or somethin#gosh and this was supposed to be a tasuhoma pic too HAHAHA
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when they cancel plans to help you finish some games you’ve been stuck on for months 😭
#im excited honestly#I need to make room for zombies so I have a tonne of games to get through by october#i finished still wakes the deep last night and it was fucking great#a new face#I’m actually gonna buy it on ps5 I think#it’s literally outlast but make it lovecraftian#and easier cuz it was mad easy 😂#but I finished that#so gears and halo are next to finish#we’re doing halo first cuz I can’t bring myself to watch dom die yet#like seriously if halo reach fucked me up I can’t imagine how I’m getting react when don’s time comes#I’ve already seen it in lore videos#but playing it is so so different#and then I fucked myselfnon infinite and saved over my solo campaign with my co op campaign so that’s really annoying#I literally can’t play with now without co op#UNLESS#I have an idea but I don’t know if it’ll work#I’m gonna try and make a second save file of it so I can have my file back 😂#and THEN if i have time i only have like 3x races left in forza and im golden#but I also really wanted to unlock all the cars#realistically I should delete all my resi games since I have them on other consoles#but I’m stubborn 😁#but also genshin coming to xbox in november#im so fucking stoked#I need to just delete something off my ps5 so I can update it#I watched gamescom onl so now a fire is lit under my bum to finish everything for when new games come out#I swear i don’t have a problem
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i would beg my brain chemistry to magically realign itself on a sensed wavelength before I end up begging for meds i don’t think it’s too much to ask is it /s
#personal for ts#ngl i get why therapist would rather not but god i just cried for twenty minutes#because i couldn’t find the thing you use to put water in the iron#and i looked at the living room desk which is a complete mess and burst out in tears#i’m late answering EVERYTHING I can’t bring myself to get out of bed at the right time in the morning#I need to finish commissions and I can’t do three sentences#and ofc 90% of the relatives think that i either need to calm down and NO NEED TO STRESS or think i have no reason to be stressed anyway#i’m so fucking tired#and like i know that i’m shit at getting over things quick and i just got worse with age#idek what i’m getting at#and i feel ridiculous bc ik what kicked me into the spiral#and i need to get the fuck over it because there is no way i’m getting any closure on that front#i KNOW that#but my brain doesn’t i guess#we’re back at i am this picture and i don’t like ir while staring at stannis baratheon aren’t we#sigh#anyway sorry for the debbiedownering s2g im answering everyone soon
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okay I severely misjudged spaghetti guy he’s actually just really cool
#okay so I came to this flat and he wasn’t here. greeted by a very dirty flat with shit all over the kitchen counters over cling film#I meet first my other flatmate who told me he stays in his room constantly bc of previous bad flatmates#has literally just a saucepan and some salt in the kitchen. so I’m like okay spaghetti guy potentially not great but could just be#how this guy is yknow#on Tuesday I get an email back saying he’s coming back from Norway tonight looking forward to seeing you feel free to use the kitchen sauces#rlly friendly message that I wasn’t expecting. I also didn’t know he’d been on a trip i just knew he wasn’t there bc his door was open#(to a REALLY nice room. multiple rlly nice plants (which he has little care labels for!!!) and it’s tidy and pretty#and he’s got a sheep teddy on the bed)#meanwhile I am in my own head bc I don’t wanna cook in the kitchen until I can clean it and I can’t clean it without moving his shit and#I haven’t seen him yet to talk abt it and I can’t bring myself to talk to him immediately bc I’m dying#and embarrassed as hell by how I’ve been cooking in my room with a microwave and air fryer (loud) and sneaking my shit out of the kitchen#but then yesterday I DO talk to him!! and he’s super friendly!! actually interested in having a conversation and Good at it.#and then he’s cooking and like. spaghetti burns but I’m not there for long and seems to be a mistake (he made the same thing for lunch today#and did Not burn the spaghetti) and is otherwise clearly competent bc the food smells Good and despite leaving a few things out it’s like#washed up stuff isn’t dirty and the sides are better despite still under cling film. more a case that he’s spread out than he’s messy#and now today we talked and i offered to hold onto some shit over summer bc complicated situation that boils down to he’s flying back home#and he cant take all his stuff and had to choose between chucking stuff/having literally nothing this weekend. like sleeping on the sofa etc#and then cleans the whole flat?? which I’m assuming a good chunk is his mess? but he did not need to do that. could’ve easily left#bc there are two people still living here who would’ve had to deal with it and he doesn’t know either at all#and THEN tonight we talk abt food which is fun bc we both ordered stuff. and he offers me some honeydew melon bc he’s been gorging himself#these past two days to finish it before it goes bad/he leaves which is also really sweet#and JUST NOW. I take my headphones out after finishing dinner and hear the sweetest fucking guitar#he plays the gentlest like dreamy sounding acoustic guitar I’ve heard in my life in his room (door closed by the time I leave)#this is actually just a really cool dude#now that the kitchens clear I’m gonna cook tomorrow and will probably offer him some bc otherwise he’s gonna be eating out all weekend#he has extra takeout for tomorrow night but might want smth Sunday#regardless I am just. huh??? left a bit stunned bc of the u turn my opinion of this guy has taken. bc my opinion of him was a reflection#of my discomfort moving to this weird dirty basement flat with two people I didn’t know#well. idk where to go from here. I think I’ll start by talking to him more this weekend. bc holy fucking shit.#luke.txt
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lately all that brings me pleasure is food, games and short videos
help
i'm turning into what i'm afraid of
#sounds kinda dramatic but i failed with uni#and now can’t bring myself to get off my ass from the screen and start working on anything#think my intellect is leaving me#bought a new book but it’s too difficult for me to force myself to finish reading the four i started earlier#made long-term plans but can’t even clean up#and#tw ed#when i feel my stomach full i want to have a drinking day tomorrow or twirl a hula hoop for an hour#just a couple of phrases from my grandmother about how i have her and my dad’s genes and that’s why i’ll get fat easily and boom#i want to be light as a feather and not eat for hours again#feel like a failure#too far from that highly intellectual genderless asexual creative and transcendental light image that i made the ideal in my head#cw vent#babbling nonsense in hashtags#will delete later probably
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i’m so uninterested in giffing rn i hate it
#p#like i have several unfinished sets in my drafts and i just can’t even bring myself to finish them
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Turns out I can’t write anything when I’m feeling like me putting energy toward creating pieces is absolutely pointless, so that’s fun!
#like I’m trying to finish up the episode script but I can’t bring myself to do so#it just feels very worthless and pointless to expend energy on something when I’m not feeling it right now
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i keep thinking about new bg3 oc ideas knowing full well i’ll never play them
#txt#like god i can’t even bring myself to finish my first playthrough ahsjdifjsh#knowing me i’ll just end of watching each companions romance scenes on youtube or something rip#because I’ve kinda lost motivation to finish the game (at least for now)
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i am HURRYIN g through these last two shadow and bone books bc i want to get to six of crows so bad lmao
#i know that you can read six of crows without finishing shadow and bone but i can’t bring myself to break the order#and i like the trilogy well enough and i have a soft spot for alina but it’s kind of dull compared to what happens in soc#just passed the 300 pg mark of siege and storm and nikolai and carrying this book lol
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Consider this my official future apology to the Simon Snow fandom for reading your fics without finishing the series
#I’ve broken and finally added all the intriguing looking fics to my tbr#only a matter of time before I actually read some of them#in m my defense I did finish carry on#…5 years ago#I just can’t bring myself to read the sequels#and now I’m just gonna add it to the shamefully long list of fandoms I read fic for despite having never finished their canons#simon snow#moonie posting
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hate when i’m so tired but can’t bring myself to go to sleep bc then that means tmr is gonna come even faster and i don’t want tmr to come bc then the routine starts all over again and i hate the routine
#uni is sucking me dry and not in a good way#and my job is not helping#but i don’t have the strength to look for a new one#and i have to finish uni anyways#so i’m stuck with this routine i hate but idk how to change it bc i can’t bring myself to change it#and the only time i actually get a break from it is when i experience small changes#like eating out or hanging out with friends but i’m trying to save money and my friends are busy with schoolwork so i can’t even seem to#get a small break and ugh im just so sick and exhausted from it#whatever#bee's pollinations
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#extricating the joy of writing from the joy of it being seen and appreciated via comments/kudos is hard#ITS HARD#I want to finish these bmf fics cause I had big plans and honestly I don’t think it would take too much work but#there’s a part of my brain that is shouting that the effort isn’t worth it and people won’t want to read it#but that’s !!! not!!!! the point#I also feel like I just keep falling into BLs as ways to cope and when the issue/stressor passes I can’t bring myself to stick around#like there’s just a void where the excitement used to be and it makes me really sad#I want to figure out how to break that I don’t want watching media and making art to be a crutch for everything else sucking#I want to love it and engage with it on its own terms—on my own terms—purely for the joy of it and what it brings to me#arghhhh
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#random#personal#vent#will prob delete this later#drawing this out because i don't know how else to deal with it#uh#went to a lot of events this month#and i brought some of my crocheting things#because if i'm not volunteering i might as well have something to do while listening to speeches#usually i bring books but my fam prefers i don't do that#but anyways we were getting ready to leave one a few days back and#a bunch of random people came up to me and started asking what i was making and how long it took and stuff#and they were going all wow mashallah you ave such talent shaturah and all that#which i thought was a bit odd but i assumed they were just curious#but when we left my fam told me they had been looking at me funny throughout the whole event#and uh#yeah#i'm pretty good at parsing out social meanings and things i think but#sometimes it feels like people are saying something over my head#and i can figure out when they are#but i can't figure out what it means#this typically happens at school cuz some of my peers don't like me very much but#i don't know if this is accurate or if i'm just paranoid?#i don't know it's a bit of a mess#doesn't help that my fam preaches about hasad all the time#it's probably no big deal#but i did end up finishing the goose and it turned out pretty good if i do say so myself#anyhow#we’re posting this cuz I can’t access my computer and it’s saved in my drafts so uh
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