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thehauntedetheral · 5 months ago

Note

That, “After all I am just a girl 🎀”, sent me! LOL! It’s such a fat fucking mood I have 24/7

So follow up request, how about a Hyper/Extreme Masculine Man x Hyper/Extreme Feminine Woman Reader

Give me someone who is wholesomely sexist that is so damn fine that the red flags start to look green

Hello! Thank you for your love. Glad that you liked my work. I hope you like my writing. This is my first time writing something like this so please be kind. I hope you love this. Enjoy!

Yandere Sexist X Reader

Requests are open!

• You and yan dated throughout the college and after graduation he proposed you. You were madly, irrevocably and passionately in love with him.

• Yan Husband who is a toxic sexist who is a excellent manipulator. He tells you after marriage how his parents were a traditional gender role household meaning husband being the bread winner and leader of house while wife being a good pretty house wife. He wants to try it. You were reluctant at first but after enough manipulation and sugar coating you agreed. After all this man is an excellent manipulator.

"Baby please just try it for me. If you don't feel good after doing this for a month we will stop it. You had been working so hard throughout the college. You can relax a bit by this and can also take a break and get the time to do all those hobbies and stuff you were interested in doing but couldn't due to college work. We have just got married why so eager for a job? Settle down have some rest. I have a very good paying job to provide for both baby. Please try this for me love?" He would say while holding your face delicately in his hand and looking at you with his gorgeous hazel eyes.

• You slowly started to delve into it. Baking, cooking meals, taking care of him and house and decorating, doing household chores, gardening vegetables, beautiful flowers and loving it.

• He was slowly brainwashing you into his little pretty house wife without you knowing.

"Baby you don't have to think about anything I will take care of everything. Hmm? You know I love you and will take care of you."

• You were a definition of hyper feminine now. Long forgotten your old ambitious about your career self in college.

• Pretty Ribbons in your long hairs, delicate cute dresses, High heels, make up on, hosting parties for his colleagues, shopping, baking, reading, trying new recipes, doing house chores while waiting for your husband to come home were now part of your daily routine.

• Yan and you you would go out for dinners and if somebody looked at you a little long he would break their bones. After all you were his wife and wouldn't allow a weird creep to stare at you.

• He was the provider and you were his pink pretty princess housewife whom he loves to dead.

• Will shower you with gifts like vacations, jewellery, dresses.

• Yan Husband who is dominant in your married life and in bed.

• Yan Husband who is a toxic manipulator sexist who will make you totally dependent on you to make sure you don't run away from him ever.

"You need me baby as much as I need you. I am your husband I know what is best for us."

"You contribute to the household by taking care of me so good which helps me to do my job properly and soon you will be the mother of our beautiful children, darling."

• Looking at his handsome face with beautiful eyes oozing masculine energy always made you forget everything.

• You know your husband is always right and will take care of you.

Requests are open!

For more yandere reading:

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smth-intheway · 3 months ago

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I haven't seen anyone talk about it, or maybe someone noticed but didn't said anything...

Neil and Charlie are connected, not only by the bonds of friendship but also by their shared symbolism of “death”, which is shown at the very end of the movie/book when their seats were empty. They are both key characters and as those who, despite their differences, are very similar.

Let's start with Neil. We all know that Neil is the one who started the dead poets society in 1959, he is the speaker and the leader of the group, as if leading the boys. He is the first to find the album with Keating's photo in it, the first to learn what the society is (yeah boys were near him), the first to read the official opening speech and assign roles to everyone. Who will read and who won’t. He acts as a confident person, his actions are based on a new feeling and finding freedom from the grip of his father. Everyone noticed how he looked at Keating when he gave his famous speech that every person in this fandom knows?

Yes, you can't help but notice how his eyes shine with hope, that he like a prisoner, will free himself from the shackles and escape from the clutches of his father. By the way, about his dad.

This man plays a very important role in Neil's life, as he does in his, albeit in the most disgusting way. His father sees himself in him only in his youth, he wants to achieve what he could not in the past. He uses Neil to turn back the time and become an ideal version of himself without caring what Neil thinks. Most likely, Mr. Perry was an unsuccessful person and perhaps he did not succeed in many things, proving this with the following phrases: "I sacrificed so much for you to be here" and "you have opportunities that I don’t had” He kind of puts pressure on Neil shoulders to give him false motivation to do things as he said, setting himself as an example, like... if you don’t do as I say, then the worst will happen to you, because I know better than you and I have lived longer than you. His father makes his son a submissive and obedient boy who is obliged to do and act as he is told, simply because he has no choice, because he is inexperienced and "impressionable" in the opinion of his father and he must definitely listen to the one who knows better in order to avoid the worst outcome. Just lower your head and show obedience like everyone else.

By the way, it is interesting that in the book the first description of Neil, and the first words about his appearance sound like this: "The breast pocket of his Welton blazer was covered with a huge cluster of achievement pins." (page 5, ch.1) Ironic, right? Now try to close your eyes and imagine the same student, without imagining Neil. What impression will you have of him? Right.. smart, successful with a brilliant future. This is what people who don’t know Neil see. He has become someone who is held up as an example. A diligent student and an example of behavior. Even the fact that in the book he wears a pillar with the inscription "excellence" as if hanging a label of idealism and perfection on himself. That is why they gave him this sign, so that he would carry it, introducing himself as the personification of that very perfection that teachers want to have in their students. But is that what he needs? Neil did not know what he wanted, he did not allow himself to go beyond what was permitted, always silently and following the rules. Afraid of getting burned like a moth over a fire. He was suppressed by his father, all the time his desires and dreams were rejected and not accepted, because there is a coordinate system and you cannot move against it. I can even assume that his father pressured him if his academic results did not satisfy him, from which Neil tried to prove that he could do better, because he wants his father to be proud of him and love him for being a good son, perhaps Mr. Perry could punish Neil for disobedience, from which the boy began to fear his father like a nightmare. Remember the scene when his father entered the room at the very beginning of the movie after the ceremony? Neil's behavior changed from before to after. With his friends he was happy, self-confident and the life of the party, but when his father showed up on the doorstep all of these traits were washed away and Neil showed his fear and insecurity.

So he hid himself, his dreams, ambitions and desires including emotions in front of his father. Several times in the book, (the movie didn’t showed it) Neil had the outbursts and slightly hysterical release of his emotions he was holding when his father was around. “Neil held the achievement pin in his hand as he spoke. “The bastard!” he shouted suddenly, jabbing his thumb with the metal point of the pin and drawing blood. Todd winced, but Neil just stared at the blood intently. He pulled the pin out and hurled it against the wall.” (Page 19, Chap3)

“Mr. Perry turned and stalked out. Neil stood still for a long time, then, walking to his desk, he started pounding on it, harder and harder until his fists went numb and tears began rolling down his cheeks.” (Page 119, chap11) Neil isn’t an emotionally stable person because his emotions only show when his father is not around. He is mentally weak because he is afraid to speak his mind around someone who will not listen to him. This is important and worth remembering because Neil has no voice around his father, so he did not tell him what he wanted, so he kept silent because he understood and built a mental reflex that his father's stubborn nature would still make him do what Neil does not want. He already knows what his father will say. Rejection. This is his weak point. He is afraid of rejection and does not want to hear it again, because he has heard it so many times ... over and over again. This Neil is very different from the confident guy he shows himself to be in society.

he did not share his feelings/thoughts with anyone, because he most likely not had close friends except Charlie. Because His entire life was planned and controlled by his authoritarian father, from A to Z. His dad would’ve probably not be happy about his son being friends with the “who the hell knows”.

That's why when he heard Keating's words about enjoying the moment, living here and now while this moment is here because one day it won't be. Carpe diem my friend. You need to look at things in the different way and not be afraid of what others think because what matters is what you think. These words entered Neil's thoughts as a basis for changing his situation, to free himself from the shackles and become who he always wanted. Because if not, this moment will never come. He began to think differently and began to go towards his dream that he wanted to acquire so much. Neil was slowly drowning in his ideal world, living freely and hopelessly, but he misunderstood Keating's words, because he had to change his idea of the world and not himself. Neil did not understand that you cannot change the situation you are in, you can only change your idea and vision of it. He wanted to take control, but he forgot that sucking out the bone marrow, you need to do it so as not to choke on the bone. It is interesting that he was the first to come and recreate the Dead poets society and the first to leave, thus killing this society.

His death has a huge influence on the plot as well as on the symbolism itself, because if you look closely, in the book he dies with his crown of flowers as if killing his personality "Puck" through which he embodied the archetype of the deceiver (his father’s deceiver), challenging the established standards of behaviour. The second one is a reference to Jesus that many talk about. So, if you think about it, the crown of branches that he wore is very similar to the one that Jesus had. At first, he looks up, supposedly into the sky, in search of the meaning of life and pondering his decision. He puts on the crown, proclaiming himself his own liberator, just as Jesus was in Christian culture.

He didn't want to depend on his father or the rotten system anymore, Neil thought he would make his own decision outside of his father's wishes. After all, if there is no freedom in life itself, then why should he live?

Then, he lowers his head as if accepting his fate and knowing that he has chosen the right path for himself.

Neil showed obedience to himself and not to someone else which made him one step freer before he got freedom completely. He, like Jesus, accepted himself as a sacrifice in the face of freedom intending to be free even if not for others then for himself. Therefore, it was his own "crucifixion".

It is interesting that he lowers his head just like the boy from that very wall painting.

Okay, but then how does he relate to Charlie? It's simple, Charlie isn't always himself either, and unlike Neil's hidden symbolism, he directly proclaims himself to be another person, namely "Nuwanda". He abandons his boring, past self by forgetting who he was through self-destruction. "I have an announcement. In keeping with the spirit of passionate experimentation of the Dead Poets, I'm giving up the name Charles Dalton. From now on, call me 'Nuwanda.'" (page 89, chap9) In the same way, he added more nuances to his personality, such as his famous phrase "getting red" and when he painted the Indian symbol of virility on his torso supposedly giving himself confidence through the symbol's underlying meaning, which is anchored in the Indian goddess Shiva-Lingam which signifies masculinity, virility and association with fertility due to its sexual significance.

The same goes for the symbols he drew on his cheek, what's interesting is that in the movie he drew it with lipstick using red again, which usually symbolizes power, passion and life, this colour is used to attract attention. But in the book... he literally scrapes dirt off the wall to draw this symbol on his cheek. (What a cheerful boy fr)

Charlie is a time bomb. He constantly has ideas in his head, at first it may seem empty but there really is a lot of things, plus this “dish” is also seasoned with the guy's self-confidence and huge ego. This is proven by the fact that Charlie literally claimed the cave when he entered it and then used it to bring girls, without worrying about the opinions of others. He kind of stands as an example of the opposite of the Welton school value system, and encourages boys not to be afraid to be more confident. In the film, he was the first to support Neil in the idea of creating a club, standing on his side, and also defending him after Cameron's betrayal at the very end, knowing that he is risking his education in Welton, but he is not afraid to take on such responsibility ... well, because why should he be afraid? He already has a future full of money, knowing that his father will force him to work with his business. By the way, about his father.

Unlike Neil, his relationship with his father is controversial and he can fight back with the confidence that he will be forgiven. In the film, his parents are shown in the background.

And in the book we only know his mother. I can assume that Charlie is a child from a rich family who lives as an accessory in the hands of his parents. He, like Neil, is the "pride" of his parents and should be an example, only Charlie does not want to follow the coordinate system and enter it instead he moves against it. Like Neil at the end of his path.

We know that Rebellion is already embedded in any ideology at the time of its creation, and rebels only personify rebellion and do not bring it to the established system of values. After all, there will always be those who are against the established system, moving in the opposite direction and trying to find other conclusions, other ideas that will definitely suit a certain type.

Charlie could become a rebel for two reasons, the first: the search for attention. Unlike the hyper-care of Neil's father over his son, his father could be so bogged down in work that he forgot about his own son, perhaps not even his beloved, because then the marriage would be of convenience. His parents did not give him enough attention, pushing him away, rejecting him. He wanted to be noticed by them so that they would give him love, so he tried to achieve it in every possible way and it became a habit. Or the second option: He was tired of living a pretense. Straightforwardness is always a way out when it’s difficult to explain. Just be simple and do not bother to be complex, so the fear of making a mistake disappears. So Charlie did, because as far back as he could remember, he hated being told how he should behave, how he should talk to guests, how he should smile, how he should take utensils for food, and so on. Charlie was tired of seeing people from high society smiling at each other with such hypocrisy, as if a second ago they had not been in deep judgmental discussion. The world of big business disgusted Charlie, because those people were too worried about how they looked in front of others and they ran after status. Charlie was a prisoner of this every day and he didn't want to be like the others, he wanted to create something of his own in his personality, something that the others didn't have and something that would distinguish them from him, or him from them. So he chose the easy way - rebellion. So Keating's words meant something to him in the sense that he would enjoy the moment of rebelling against the school's rules and building his own system. Charlie could relate to his own approaching "death" if life at Welton was not symbolic but real. That is, his expulsion is an actual death. It could be similar to the phrase that Carpe diem oppose - Memento Mori. Carpe diem, in simple terms, says that death is inevitable, but it is unknown when it will come, and therefore it should not be feared, but instead enjoy the moment, which is what Keating taught his students, but there is also memento mori, which says that death is inevitable, but the moment of its onset can be delayed by behaving, so to speak, you should live “correctly” and act rationally for the benefit of your own life. In other words, memento mori means that everything is in your hands and when you die is determined by how you live. And Carpe diem is about the opposite, that nothing depends on you. And therefore you can and should take everything from life here and now. These two terms are closely related to the understanding of Keating's lessons, so each DPS boy had his own end. Tragic or partly happy. Knox and Todd understood that you can't change this system, but you can change your attitude towards it by finding beauty in things and avoiding death, but Neil and Charlie didn't understand him, wanting to change system and putting their lives on the line, so both of their seats are empty at the end.

If you think about it... Charlie is Neil's desire for suicide. After all, he too is moving towards self-destruction by excluding himself from the system directly through death, while Charlie does it indirectly by going through exclusion.

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beatrice-otter · 2 years ago

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Why AO3 needs to be accountable for reducing fandom racism in its internal culture and the archive

You've probably seen end-otw-racism in the last few days, trying to get people to support their efforts to get the AO3 to actually DO something about the racism problem that AO3 has admitted that it has. Here's their call to action post, with a brief summary of the problems and what they want people to do about it. Basically, there have been problems with racism at AO3 since the beginning, and they did acknowledge the problems in 2020 and promise to fix them, and haven't actually ... done most of the things they said they would. They have started to implement blocking and muting, which is good, because those are vital tools for fans of color to protect themselves from racist harassment, but they haven't updated their TOS or changed their Abuse policies or hired the diversity consultant they said they were going to. And that's a big problem. Among other things the original head of the Abuse team--the one who set it up and developed the policies and procedures still in use today!--was a noted racist who has since been banned from at least one convention and at least one fanwork exchange for making a lot of fans of color uncomfortable. This is not the only problem with a white supremacist culture in the organization, but it is emblematic of the larger issues with the organization's culture that have not been addressed. (That link is from 2020, but nothing substantial has changed since then, alas.) If you think that the AO3 is fine, and people are overstating things, I really encourage you to go read that post and the links in it. And then go read these tweet threads about what the state of things at AO3 is now. Maybe also go read Stitch's excellent essays on racism in fandom (and remember that people have tried to destroy her life--get her fired and get her on terrorist watch lists--for writing them). What sorts of things does end-otw-racism want? Basic stuff that AO3 should already be doing. For example, people should not be allowed to harass people through AO3 using trolling fanworks, harassing tags, and comments. Yet when people use these parts of AO3 infrastructure to harass people of color and create a hostile environment for them, AO3 Abuse says there's nothing they can do and it doesn't count as harassment under the site's TOS. end-otw-racism is not calling for censorship. They are calling for the OTW to realize that AO3 currently has a Nazi Bar Problem. You cannot have a safe that is safe for both nazis and people of color. If you try, the nazis will harass and drive out the people of color. Tolerance is not a moral principle, it is a peace treaty; if one side does not abide by it, asking the other side to abide by it is asking them to lay down and accept their abuse. And free speech is incredibly important, but it has limits; and those limits are where you are using speech to harass people and incite violence, which some people are using AO3 to do! I hope that you will all support end-otw-racism in calling for the AO3 to fulfill its promises and address the issues in question, and I hope the AO3 will listen. comments Comment? https://ift.tt/4BR98XN

#dreamwidth #original post

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scatteredpiecesofme · 6 days ago

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Favourite background character - or, justice for Alexander!

Since I was a bit disappointed by how Alexander's character was treated in S3, I decided to celebrate him as my favourite background character for the YRFavesFest2024. He deserves some love!!

"... anyone here who has been bullied, hit, beaten up?"

I'll start with this scene from 03.02, which I think is filmed and edited very cleverly.

At first the focus is on Vincent who's giving his little speech, while Alex is in the background and a bit blurred, but we can still detect him making big side eyes at Vincent. And how could he not? He, of all people, knows very well that bullying is a real thing at Hillerska.

At this point, before Vincent even finishes his sentence, the camera cuts on Alex - who now is on focus and at the centre of the frame - right on the words 'hit, beaten up':

I'm not reading this as a suggestion that Alex has ever been physically beaten up, but his posture and his eyes towards the floor perfectly convey the image of someone who feels beaten, if only emotionally.

And then Henry chimes in:

Henry is naively incredulous, but his comment must sound dismissive to Alex, who raises his eloquent eyes up again: sure as hell, he does not think that the story is overblown at all. No matter if the tradition of the porn/homophobic initiations was stopped and present day students don't go through it anymore, Alex understands that it's something totally believable.

It's just a quick sequence and Alex is clearly not meant to be the main focus of this scene as a whole, but his presence in the background and Xiao excellent ability to speak without words add further layers to the scene itself and make it even more meaningful.

Yay, some happiness!

Thank god, even though the creators didn't give Alex any line in S3, they at least let him have some happy moments. It's a joy to see him so cheerful and carefree during the camping trip! Look at him!

The trio

My last point, which is also my favourite among the glimpses we get of Alex in S3, is about the trio Alex-Henry-Walter. Throughout the season, in fact, Alexander, is often spotted in close proximity to either Henry or Walter or both:

In particular, I absolutely adore this shot:

The lighting and the colours are gorgeous, but most of all I love the glance Henry and Alex exchange while they're trying hard not to burst into laughters (it's the moment when August is gulping down a big glass of wine). I like that despite being on duty, once again at the service of the third years, Alex Henry and Walter seem to have fun, relaxed and giggly.

The icing on the cake, for me, is of course the white party! Alexander looks fabulous with that sparkly purple eyeshadow (or whatever it is) and the trio is all ready to enjoy the craziest night.

Alas, the show doesn't let us know anything about the nature of their relationship. Or maybe it's a good thing, as it allows the audience the most freedom of interpretation. Is it camaraderie among fellow students? Is it authentic and sincere friendship? Something more?? What do we think? As in the fandom there's already an established little group of passionate Walty shippers (looking at you, friend, hehe), I wonder if anyone ships them as a throuple? Queerplatonic, maybe? Come on rarepair enjoyers, don't be shy!

Personally, I read them as just friends (both Walty and Walty+Alex), and I like to imagine the three of them cherishing this friendship formed during their school years, cultivating it into their adult life and living many future adventures as a trio, but any headcanon is valid and welcome. No matter what configuration, shape or form it might take, I just hope for Alexander to find someone who makes him feel respected and loved. We all deserve that, in fiction and in real life.

I'm closing this post with this beautiful, intense and emotional close-up from episode six:

Big thanks to @youngroyals-events for planning and hosting this event!

#such a shame that Alex was reduced to a background character with no lines in S3 #I hope I did at least a little bit of justice for him #young royals #alexander bragé #xiao long zhao #yrfavesfest2024

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leodette · 5 months ago

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Hello! Would it be possible to do 50 for Carlos Sainz?

hello! I'm honored to write this for you, sorry for the delay, real life happened (sadly). hope you like it!

no. 50 - putting a hand over the other’s mouth to shut them up

Not Unhinged or Unhappy | CS55

fandom: Formula 1

pairing: Carlos Sainz x OC (not named)

names/faceclaims: -

summary: don't work too much, darling...

warning: none

requested: yes / no

**********

Summer break was probably the best part of the whole season. At least for her. She and Carlos didn't have a public relationship - private, not secret - and she had to work during most of his racing weekends. That was the tax for having her own business and being stubborn enough to not allow her boyfriend to help her financially.

And so far Carlos didn't mind. He loved that she worked, that she did the same thing as him - her passion as her fulltime job. Yes, it was sometimes a bit sad for her not being able to be there in the garage and watchung him doing rounds, but they managed! And she promised to come to some races at the second half of the year, once she'd be comfortable enough to leave her business in her assistant's hands for a weekend.

Right now, they were "practicing" for that moment. She took 10 days off... and Carlos immediately whisked her away to Mallorca on his yacht, enjoying time together, lounging around, eating delicious seafood and Mediterranean cuisine, drinking crisp white wines and just relaxing. But still she wasn't able to NOT work at least an hour or two every day.

"Princesa, they will manage a day without you," Carlos hugged his girlfriend from behind, putting his chin on her shoulder while she sat by the table after they've finished breakfast, her laptop opened and the order system of her small independent fashion brand filling in. She scoffed a bit and sipped her iced tea before opening the Excel tab.

"Give me an hour mi amor, this needs to be done otherwise the shipment will be late," she gently smiled at him and pressed a sweet peck at his cheek before smoothering the wrinkle on his forehead.

"It's only an hour, Carlos. And don't frown, you'll have wrinkles," she chuckled before turning her attention back to the laptop.

Pinon came to them, carrying his favorite sweet corn stuffy and laying under her feet, looking at Carlos in a way that very clearly said 'do something, I wanna play'. And Carlos would love to, but his workoholic girlfriend wouldn't be disturbed.

"Hi Dida, any problem in the storage?" she picked up her phone, answering the call. Carlos rolled his eyes. Call with Dida would take another at least twenty minutes, and even after that it wouldn't be sure if his girl would allow herself to actually close the laptop and leave the thoughts of any disaster that could happen in the storage to people that actually were there.

His thoughts were interrupted when his lady left out a big breath and rubbed her eyes before shaking her head and opening another tab.

"Yeah I will take a look at it right now, could have it in like two hours ready? Would that be-" she wasn't able to finish because the phone disappeared from her hand and her laptop was closed with a loud clap.

"Hello Dida, Carlos here. Your boss will log out now. She leaves all control in your competent hands. She-" he clapped his hand over her mouth, shutting out her protests with efficiency, "- is on holiday. And holiday is for relaxing. Which as you for sure know she desperately needs. So from now, you will only call her when the storage is on fire, or if the Spanish Queen herself orders from you, okay? It was ncie to hear you, Dida. Thanks for your cooperating, ¡Qué tenga un buen día!"

And with that he pressed the button, ending the call immediately and putting it away from her grasping hands. His girlfriend was looking at him with a pure shock in her eyes, not being able to say anything.

"Mi amor," he took her face in his hands, cradling like the most precious porcelain vase, "you're exhausted. You need to stop thinking about this. I know how important it is for you, but taking time off is important as well."

She huffed and crossed her arms, reminding Carlos of a small child throwing a tantrum when their Mama wouldn't buy them a lolipop in a grocery store. He chuckled weakly.

"Okay, let's do it with force now."

And ignoring her scream when he scooped her up in his arms, he walked to the railing and jumped in the crystal blue waters of Mediterranean Sea, earning an excited bark from their dog. Carlos didn't let her out of his arms, instead hugging her close to him when they both got at the surface, spitting water and wiping their eyes off of salty water.

"Te amo mi Princesa," he murmured when smoothing her wet her from her face and pressing kiss to her lips. She said nothing, merely squeezed her arms around his neck, hugging him tighter.

"I'm sorry for being a workaholic, Charli," she murmured the nickname only she was able to use, earning a chuckle from him.

"Don't aplogize, just promise me - no more work for the reamining time we're here, okay?"

She just nodded and hid her face in his neck, Carlos pressing a kiss to the side of her head.

#carlos sainz #cs55 #cs55 x reader #carlos sainz jr #carlos sainz fic #scuderia ferrari #formula 1 #f1

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cosyvelvetorchid · 2 months ago

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I finally finished it!

15k+ word, Buck 2.0, Tommy 1.5, smutty with a bit of fluff fic.

To be completely honest, I’m not entirely happy with it—I’ve certainly written better fics. But if I didn’t get it finished and up it would never be posted.

Anyway, I hope you enjoy it and soothes your little bucktommy broken hearts 🩶

**********

Word count: 15,537

Rated: E

Excerpt:

Buck wasn’t exactly sure of his sexuality. For most of his life he was straight—women were what he wanted. And he wanted them. A lot of them. There was a time where he actually considered that he might be a sex addict.

Really, he was just searching for something. He didn’t know what, or where he would find it, just knew that there was a hole somewhere inside of him that something was supposed to fit within.

And then he met up with some old buddies he’d met in Peru, went to a bar, had way too many drinks, and before he knew it he was in a dark corner with a guys tongue down his throat. It was sloppy and wet and didn’t lead to anything more but suddenly, that thing that Buck had been searching for his whole life; the illusive unknown and unidentifiable something that was missing, was clear as day.

That was three months ago. He hadn’t said a word about it to anybody—not his sister, defiantly not his parents and not the 118 either. He wasn’t ashamed of what had happened, but he needed time to for some introspection—to figure out what it really meant for him; what he wanted. Plus, at the time it happened he was a month shy of finishing his probationary year at the 118 and though he’d come along way from stealing engines to hook up, he still wanted to prove that he was worthy of becoming a fully fledged member of the LAFD and that was his primary focus and what he wanted everyone else to see and not his sexuality.

Thankfully he passed his probation and welcomed into the 118 permanently.

*****

Buck couldn't deny that he found Tommy gorgeous. That is, he couldn't deny it now. Tommy had piqued an interest within him when he'd first joined the 118 fourteen months ago, only he was oblivious as to what it was. For a while he'd thought it was jealousy—Tommy was built a little bigger than himself, and just seemed so effortlessly cool.

It was after his drunken kiss with the guy from the bar that he noticed Tommy. His beautiful big blue eyes, those huge biceps, and yeah that ass that you could sink your teeth into. He wasn't exactly crushing on the guy, but he could admire the beauty.

But his personality was an entirely different matter. Everyone gravitated towards Tommy; wanting his approval, inviting him to games or hang outs. Which buck for the life of him couldn’t figure out why. For as excellent as he was at his job, he was also an asshole. At least to Buck. No matter what Buck did it was never right—Tommy always found some way to criticise him. Hen had told him to give Tommy time to warm up to him; that deep down he was a good guy. Must have be really fucking deep because at Buck could not seem to find that good side no matter how hard he tried to find it.

Buck had assumed once he'd passed his probation the attitude would let up. It did not. He was professional when it came to work matters, but beyond that he either sniped at Buck or ignored him entirely. Buck wasn't sure which he'd prefer.

Tommy walked into work in a particularly bad mood. He was short with Buck as usual, but he was also equally hot-tempered with everyone. Sal, his partner, had left a few days prior to take up the Captains spot at the 122, and Tommy was clearly not handling it very well.

He'd snapped at Hen for offering to help him clean the engine, he'd sworn at Chimney for dropping a knife near his foot—which didn't even touch him—in the kitchen. And then Buck made the egregious mistake of turning a corner without looking and bumping into Tommy which send his mug of coffee all down Tommy's shirt.

"What the fuck is wrong with you Buckley?! Are those eyes on your face there for just fucking decoration?!" He shoulder barged Buck as he walked past, aggressively stomping towards the bathroom. Buck followed him into the room, despite that voice in the back of his mind telling him it was a bad idea. Tommy was leaning over the sink, running a wet paper towel over the wet stain on his shirt.

"I-I'm really sorry, Tommy. I wasn’t-"

"You weren't what?!" Tommy interrupted curtly. "You weren't paying attention? Surprise surprise the 118 puppy can't pay attention." He snarled.

Buck had been called a few names during his probie year, but none bothered him like "puppy" did. It was just so fucking infantilising.

"Im not a puppy." Buck told him through gritted teeth. He had been slowly growing tired of Tommy's behaviour towards him. He'd put up with it while he was on probation because he understood that you have to earn the trust of firefighters; prove you're not just capable of the job, but that they can safely put their lives in your hands. That trust takes time, and Buck put in a tremendous amount of effort to prove himself.

Everyone else had accepted him. Everyone else had welcomed him into the family. But not Tommy. Tommy had continued to keep him at arms length and it had began pissing Buck off.

Tommy rolled his eyes and scoffed, something he'd done a thousand times, but this time Buck bit back.

"What the hell is your problem with me, Kinard?" He stepped forward; his pulse beginning to rise.

"Do you want a list?" He replied, continuing to rub at his shirt pointlessly as the stain was not going anywhere. He didn't bother looking at Buck.

Actually, a list would be helpful.

"Seriously, what the hell have I done to you?! A little hazing while I was a probie I get but I passed my probation period two fucking months ago! So why are you still acting like a colossal douchebag?!"

Tommy turned his head quickly and his eyes finally met Bucks. His jaw was tense and lips tightly curled. For a moment Buck thought Tommy was about to hit him.

Without warning he stepped forward, grabbed Buck by the scruff of his shirt and pushed forward, slamming Buck into the wall behind. Between the shock of being pushed and the minor winding of being slammed into the wall, Buck lost his ability to speak.

Tommys face was inches from his. His big blue eyes staring hard into Bucks and his hot and rapid breaths fanning his face. Buck immediately felt his pants tightening. It was so fucking ridiculous that this was what turned him on and yet there was his dick pushing against his zipper.

He knew needed to push him off and get out of the bathroom before Tommy noticed how hard he was and used it as more ammunition to treat him like shit. But before the thought had even finished in his mind, Tommy's hand was on Buck belt unbuckling it. His other hand still had hold of Bucks shirt while he pulled down the zipper.

His eyes didn't leave Bucks as his hand reached into his boxers and oh god!

**********

#911 abc #911 #911onabc #tommy kinard #bucktommy #911 buck #evan buckley #buck x tommy #evan buck buckely #bucktommy fic #tevan #tevan fic #bucktommy au #bucktommy alternate meet

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vindicated-truth · 2 months ago

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I've been in online fandom spaces ever since I was 11 or 12—which is really not an age anyone should be left alone in the internet with. In our generation's defense though—as well as our parents' defense—we were the first generation to have online experiences in all its forms, including fandom, and no one really knew how to navigate the new virtual space, least of all our own technologically-challenged parents.

I'm now 35 years old, so it's been about two and a half decades of being a fangirl in varying degrees of fandom participation, but throughout the different fandoms I've been in, a lot of it has been spent both reading and writing fanfiction.

And what I've come to realize now, as I'm in the relatively older range of fandom, is that even the mindset changes.

I can tell now if a story, for example, is written by someone younger. And it's not even about the technical things like grammar or spelling, because a lot of writers have excellent technical writing regardless of age.

But it's in the inherent themes in the stories being written, the underlying philosophies and values that stand out the most to me. Even the perception of life, reality, dreams, and fears, it's all so fascinatingly—different now, when you're older.

And it's fascinating reading these stories written by younger fans, because it's also a stark reminder of how you were, too.

I'd think—oh, I used to be like that, too. I don't, anymore, but it's fascinating that I remember I once was.

It's not even a judgment of whether it's a good thing or not—it's just a statement of fact that even your own perceptions change as you grow older. For better or for worse.

I used to be a lot more idealistic, for one. And it makes me smile sometimes reading stories or statements by younger fans, because sometimes I think—I hope you never lose that. That spark and enthusiasm for life—hold on to that, and cherish that, because it can so easily be snuffed out despite your best efforts to protect it.

At the same time, I'm a lot kinder now. Sometimes I'd read stories and statements and see how angry and unforgiving and bitter some fans are and that would also make me think—someday, you'll understand. Someday, you'll realize that people are inherently flawed and more broken than they deserve to be, and it matters that you extend kindness to them, too.

Because you'll realize that you are just as flawed and broken as them, and you need them to be kind to you, too.

They aren't perfect, but then again—neither are you.

Sometimes I think of fandom history, and how it all started with older women in their 40s, 50s, and 60s back in the days of Star Trek: The Original Series, and how it's these older women who paved the way for younger girls all over the world and all subsequent generations to discover a community and passion that will keep that fire of life in you burning.

And I wonder how these older women think of all succeeding younger women, how the perspectives and values change over time.

I wonder how I'll be, too—ten, twenty, thirty years from now.

And it's why I sometimes find it amusing when younger fans say that older women are "too old" to still be in fandom space, when it's older women who created this space in the first place.

I wonder if these younger fans who are now in fandom realize that you never really grow out of fandom. You just grow in it.

And that's something noteworthy too. Because if anything, fandom is a written history of you, too. How you grow, how you change.

And most importantly, how you learn.

All this to say: do not shame anyone for being in fandom, regardless of age.

This is your story, too.

#personal #writing #musings #fanfiction #fandom

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queenlua · 4 months ago

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what would you recommend as a first Fire Emblem game to play? do i just pick up the latest one, or does an older one capture the True Fire Emblem Experience(tm) better? sorta like Super Metroid still being my absolute favorite of that series…

iiiiiinteresting question, huh! it probably depends somewhat on what you think you'll like / care about the most in a Fire Emblem game?

my personal first FE game was Sacred Stones & i think that's still a really good place to start. the spritework is *gorgeous*; i personally think it's the visual peak of the series. it's got the core "old-school" FE gameplay but with lots of nice quality-of-life improvements (as compared to e.g. something like FE4 or FE7), and the story is my second-favorite in the series after the Tellius games—just a good core emotional core with really well-drawn characters and support conversations.

the drawback is that it's on GBA, so if you don't have one of those lying around (or some other handheld to play it on), you're stuck playing it on an emulator on a computer, which i think hampers the enjoyment somewhat—like, i played a lot of that game in "in-between" moments, while on the bus, etc, and it was really excellent for that. also: it's on the easier side! which i didn't mind; i find the FE game loop enjoyable both when i'm just cruising through baddies AND when i'm having to tightly & rigorously strategize every move. but i know a couple people who stopped playing because they found it too easy & got bored

i do think the Gamecube/Wii FEs (Path of Radiance and Radiant Dawn, aka the Tellius games) hold up really well. obviously i am a little insane about them *stares at fanfiction output* and thus clearly biased, but the character writing is shockingly good & rich (sometimes despite itself, lol), and the gameplay's real fun! reasonably challenging while not making you want to throw your controller across the room (unless you opt into lunatic you mad lad!). i do think they're a little ugly though lol. rip. also, if you like PoR enough to play RD, you'll find RD... uneven. it's uneven in ways that mostly delight me, but like, yeah it's suffering a little from "we're telling like four different storylines with a HUGE cast & jerking you around between them a bit" so it interrupts the usual "smooth progression of your carefully-curated army" gameflow for something more like "wow, hope you're looking forward to saying BYE FELICIA to all your old dudes & putting down a random rebellion in Crimea for exactly five chapters & then doing something else entirely."

those games are my personal faves though and. i will always tell people to start with them. in principle. but you should decide if you trust me lol

a WHOLE lot lot of people got started with Awakening, and the core gameplay in that one is VERY fun. about halfway through, if you're sufficiently clever at assigning abilities, the game becomes a little too easy to "break," but it's an enjoyable ride the whole time. it also introduced a LOT of the quality-of-life improvements people now take for granted in modern FEs (you can choose to disable permadeath; UX is much nicer; etc). so if dealing with some old-school cruft is unpalatable to you, you'll definitely want Awakening or newer.

unfortunately the writing in Awakening is, uh, not great, lol. there's two generations of characters you're playing as, and the first generation is just... not very interesting! very one-note and tropey! storyline is nonsense! the second-generation characters are a little more fun but overall i found the main plot's incoherence + the plethora of dull characters meant that i found the story very forgettable.

i think the writing in Conquest/Birthright is similarly weak but i do have to say, if you want to powergame and optimize stats and get REALLY SWEATY GAMEPLAY NERD about it, Conquest can't be beat. best map design in the series, extremely challenging, etc

and then there's the massive fandom juggernaut known as Three Houses lol. of the "modern" FEs, this game contains the most Stuff I Like About Fire Emblem. the storyline's a lil jankier than e.g. the Tellius storyline, but still has plenty of fun stuff to chew on, and even if you don't some of the 3-4 storylines offered, there's a pretty strong chance you'll resonate with at least one of them. and the gameplay is *fun*, lots of QoL improvements, reasonably snappy...

...but it does have a somewhat bloated, "AAA-gamification" feel. visiting the monastery between EVERY SINGLE FUCKING CHAPTER to do "home base"-y stuff gets old fast. and also, the gameplay starts to drag some as you go along... a campaign takes like 40-50hrs iirc, and near the end, i usually find myself going like "jfc i don't WANT to do these three skirmish battles before i go onto the next one... but i need to because it's the Objectively Optimal Thing To Do... why is this game making playing it so annoying," lol. also, the writing, while reasonably solid... could've been reduced by like 50% and probably been *stronger*? most "old-school" FE games only had 3-5 support conversations per unit, and that was generally enough to give a good sense of the character without Overwhelming With Pointless Chatter. but so many characters in Three Houses have *so much more* text than that and it just starts feeling like.. a chore... to go through... especially when in practice i won't even like all those conversations... so yeah idk

tl;dr if you have slightly old-school sensibilities, get Sacred Stones; if you want a "modern" feel, get Awakening or Three Houses; if you want to make Lua Internetperson happy, personally, you should grab Path of Radiance :P

#sorry for the wall of text lol #not enough time to write a shorter one etc

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a-risk-to-take · 11 months ago

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….you posted your tattoo (sick) and linked to house of dirk and i read it all and its unfinished. if you hadn’t posted i may have lived my life without getting fanfic blue balled for the first time since 2015. if you have any sympathy for my loss you would give me fanfic recs >:[ /lh

I feel your pain believe me 😭😭 I’m sorry I didn’t warn you at least. I’m low-key hoping the tattoo image gets to imarriedacherub and inspires them to continue the story - obviously not likely but it’s nice to dream!

I got recs for you though! I’ve got hundreds of bookmarks on my ao3 but here’s the HS stuff I love the most:

The epics:

Dayvhe’s Broken Diamond Club and everything by @unda-dsk: DBDC is my personal fave of theirs, and the best treatment of troll culture in any fic ever. If you know HS fic you are probably aware of MC Escher That’s My Favorite MC, and that one is absolutely excellent and completely deserves its status as one of the very best. And then there’s Alternate Universe, which is a perfect and beautiful magic school story. All of these are absolutely top-tier - I cannot stress this enough. They are epic and very long but some of the best stuff I’ve ever read—fanfic or otherwise—and they changed me when I read them. Despite the length, DBDC is very episodic so you can read each chapter as its own story and easily take breaks in between them without losing the flow, so you might want to start there. I promise it’s worth it!!

so we don’t kill the ones we love by @callmearcturus: I’ve never read anyone who can create an atmosphere like Arc can - this one is kind of a John Wick AU but in a really refreshing and elevated way. The characterization is so on point. Lots more I could rave about but I’ll just add that Arc’s Karkats are the hottest and most based out there. Again all his stuff is really good - this one is my favorite, but don’t miss this really cool magic artisan AU also.

The meteorstucks:

Aahhh there’s no way this is gonna be complete because I’ve read like hundreds and I get them confused but these are some that stand out. In case you haven’t notice already this list is gonna be very davekat centric!

Keep It Down by sburbanite - chef’s kiss concept and execution just read it

A Xenological Exploration of Music and Language by superbloom - super fun and well written with neat headcanon - and turned me on to some great music

I’m actually gonna just declare this section unfinished for now - I need to revisit these and remind myself what’s what - stay tuned!

Illustrated

Since you liked HoD you might be looking for more comic-y stuff with art. Definitely check out @chthonicarcher’s amazing davekats! Such as That’s All We Are

Dream a Little Dream of Me by koroke - this is just a little dream bubble comic but it’s simply the loveliest and I’m massively envious of the art style

Gonna Need Some Windex by the End of the Year by magniloquentChanteuse - more artistic storytelling just neat!

It’s About Time by @laurasauras - this is a sweet cute lovely little time travel davekat that I actually sent to a friend to read who knew nothing about HS and successfully led them into the fandom. (Followed by AU by Unda). Laurasauras is prolific and there are so many great fics written by them I can’t list them all here but they are one of my absolute favorite authors. Their understanding of the strider psyche is absolutely impeccable

The Worst Goddamn Movies Ever Fucking Made by writerbot - this fic brought me so much hilarity and joy I can’t even tell you. The Karkat voice is perfect and delightful and the social media interludes are so fucking funny and impressive. One of the first fics to show me how creative and funny this fandom can be.

I’m surely going to add to this - there are so many more meteorstucks and other authors I know I’ll think of after I post this - but I don’t want to spend too much longer on this now when you could be reading some of this great stuff! ENJOY!!

#homestuck fanfics #homestuck #davekat #fanfic recs #fan fiction

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doublel27 · 11 days ago

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I love all your takes on fandom, ships, queer media, so I want to ask, what do you think about writing fanfic of real people ie. Thai BL couple? I'm coming back to fandom (K-pop to Thai BL specifically) after years and I'm having this urge to write fanfic of this branded pair that I like, like an AU version of them some sort. I have always wanted to write my own romance novels so I figure this could be a way to practice writing, but when I was still in K-pop fandom on Twitter, I was constantly told that writing fanfic shipping real people is weird. Honestly the thought of writing about a ship in this K-pop group I like still weird me out (although I do ship them) and is not exciting. But I have no problem putting the Thai BL pair into the stories I have in my head. I have spent hours consuming fanfics of them on Thai novel site using Google Translate. Also, Thai fandom has this thing where instead of the actor's name, it usually would be character's name with their face attached to it, like they are acting and the fanfic is a script, which make reading them more fun, open up more possibilities and dynamics. Would love to hear your thoughts. Thank you and sorry for the bad English. 🙏🏻

Hi Nonnie,

Thanks for the complement and coming here with this ask. I appreciate the kind words very much.

As far as real-person fanfic (RPF)I think it gets a lot of hate from a lot of people, but also it’s super common in the world in general and not just in unpaid fanfic circles. While I don’t write RPF myself, I’ve always had friends who did and do, and I see no real problem with it. As long as you’re not tagging the real people in it, I have no problem with its existence.

A huge problem and conflation with RPF being a huge toxic problem is that it assumes that everyone writing RPF is a toxic fan (tin-hat, sasaeng, etc) who is out there demanding that those real people get together and that by writing about the possibility of them potentially being together you are removing their agency and are being creepy and forceful. The reality is that most people who read and write RPF are normal fans with normal boundaries who know it’s all fiction and all in good fun, and it’s just a few bad apples that ruin the fun because they cannot separate the person from the object that has been created and is being packaged as a commodity (which is what the personas of famous people are).

I think in Thai BL fandom there’s an added layer of ease because they’ve already adopted an RPF model of promotion to sell their pairs and shows. Now whether any of those men are actually together in real life, there is a performance of a level of intimacy they perform in front of crowds and social media. Because the imagined couple or branded couple or CP already exists as a fantasy for fans to enjoy, there’s a level of implicit buy-in from the artists that doesn’t necessarily exist in other fandom spaces. This may be why it’s easier for you to enjoy it in Thai BL fandom than in another.

But real people write and profit off of RPF all the time. Every biopic in Hollywood tells an imagined story about a real-life figure and their real life events. People win whole Oscars for their depictions of RPF!! Hamilton is an excellent example of a viral musical that is an RPF story come to life, especially the Hamilton/Angelica storyline as she was already married long before they met. Evita is another classic RPF musical that is beloved by the people. The myth of Anastasia and the beloved 1998 animated classic is a hopeful bit of RPF that has existed in some form or another since the fall of the Russian royalty (though the grand duchess receiving girls who pretended to be Anastasia is a real event so…RPF). The Crown on Netflix is RPF. I think time and distance helps people not feel it’s less weird, like if the person isn’t going to see it then maybe it’s fine.

I think RPF also gets a bad name because it’s largely what tabloids and gossip blogs have long traded on. Especially as tabloids and gossip columns trade in stories that are aggressive and accusatory and demeaning, and are meant for the personalities in question to see and are reported to be true. A lot of people conflate the two things.

My best practices for RPF run about the same as general fanfiction: keep it to fan sites like the one you’re currently reading it on (or tumblr, or AO3, or any of the many options out there), if you’re going to share it on Twitter or Instagram (which I’m old and wouldn’t because I belligerent in a healthy level of separation - the way I can’t with people just casually adding omega verse comments and retweets to pictures on public forums) don’t @ them and even be careful using hashtags because if actors want to read that they should go looking for it like the rest of us, and generally just be respectful of the artists and their life and their personal boundaries. General rule of thumb for interactions with everyone: if it’s not something they can change in 5 minutes or something wildly not okay, don’t comment on a persons actions or decisions.

And that’s about it. I hope you write what you want to write. What you’re talking about, using them almost as a dream cast for your original fiction is also barely in the RPF category. I hope you have fun. Your English was fantastic (said as a lifelong English speaker who has taught the language and am unsure how proficient any of us are with this creole of a language).

Oh and if you’re messing around in Thai BL RPF just know that Joong Archen may find whatever you write and read it. We have a deal, Joong, I know you’re out here somewhere but I would like to keep my old lady sensibilities and pretend that my fandom life is still kept relatively separate from the artists.

#real person fiction #rpf #my stance on this hasn’t changed in 20 years #won’t be changing any time soon #thai bl #Thai bl fandom #and this is really using them as a dream cast #but also if you want to write RPF do it #just be normal about it #but plenty of the people who aren’t normal about the actors/artists aren’t writing RPF #and that’s been true in every fandom I’ve been in for 20+ years #joong archen haunts me the same way ronen did season three when he tweeted about trending on tumblr #I don’t need to know you’re here #but I’m glad you’re enjoying it #doublel27 answers #anon ask #anonymous

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acourtofthought · 7 months ago

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Is Lucien's feelings for Elain more of a strong feeling of admiration or deep affection? From the small snippets of Lucien's POV and instances of longing, I don't know how deep his feelings for his mate are. I've been reading a boatload of meta about Lucien and the majority of them state that his feelings for Elain are a combination of guilt from Jesminda and a desire to be with Elain. How deep is this desire? (while Isolating it from the feelings brought about by the bond.)

I believe Lucien's feelings for Elain are something that would be difficult for us to put a label on.

I do think that he initially struggled with his guilt over Jesminda, he'd spent centuries believing she was his mate then the first time he officially met Elain he thought her the most beautiful female he'd ever seen. That would mess with anyone's head especially when he knew Elain was in love with someone else at that point. Jesminda had been loyal to him, had lost her life for him yet here he is drawn to someone who wants someone else.

But it's been nearly two years and I do think he's started to come to terms with it. I imagine Sarah will touch upon it in his book just as she had Cassian reflect on his past feelings for Mor in both his bonus and the start of SF but I don't think it's a major factor in his situation with Elain right now, especially after they all nearly died in the war.

As far as what he is feeling for Elain at this point? I'm going to use a few lines from the series I'm currently reading because I've never before seen an author who so eloquently describes a bond snapping into place for two strangers. This author does an excellent job of explaining the bond versus love and how the two characters eventually grow to have both with one another.

This is what is said of the bond snapping between them and I imagine what Lucien and Elain experienced in the Hybern scene:

"Your soul calls out. Mine answers, beloved."

At last she remembered why the Fey words seemed so familiar. She'd read them before in a slim volume of translated Fey poetry. It was the greeting a Fey man spoke to a woman when recognizing and claiming her as his true mate.

And then, in what is probably similar for Lucien when he first saw Elain in the HOW:

Sariel had joined her life with his, even knowing their souls would never follow where their hearts had led. Then she had died, and he had survived her death. Ah, gods, how he had railed against that. If Sariel had been his truemate, the mate of his soul rather than simply the mate of his heart, nothing could have chained him to life after her death.

Somehow, for some reason beyond his understanding, the gods had granted this slender Celierian girl - scarcely more than a child - the power to save the tairen and the Fey. Somehow, though he did not want it, they had granted her the power to save him.

Though the MMC uses the phrase "your soul calls out, mine answers" his thoughts make it clear he never expected to find a truemate and didn't want anyone after Sariel's death. He feels guilt in exactly the same way Lucien did with Jesminda and says he doesn't want the responsibility of the FMCs safety and happiness. Yet despite all that, despite openly admitting he doesn't want the bond he understands what the bond is and what it means and why his path forward will always be the bond.

But the FMC still has to accept the bond regardless of it instantly snapping. There are multiple threads that need to be forged between them before she fully does. At points she's disappointed because she knows how much he loved his lost lover and feels that what he feels for her cannot compare as he only just met her but his response is:

"We are talking at cross-purposes. You speak of love, while I speak of something far greater. You are my she'tani, the other half of my soul. It is a bonding so deep I could never hope to deny it, even if that was my desire. Feelings of the heart are nothing compared to that."

And this is where I think we in the fandom tend to get tripped up when talking about Lucien's feelings for Elain. Some try to box it in to what we know of love but that's the point of fated mates stories, love is not the ultimate. A mating bond is something we can't understand, that most characters can't understand until it happens to them.

In our lives we meet someone, we get to know them, we start to fall for them and then we fall in actual love. Sometimes it's long lasting and wonderful, sometimes we find that after a few years the person feels like a stranger once again but in each case they are still completely separate from us, an individual with their own goals and desires and we can only hope that the things we want from life remain the same. We only know what they are thinking when they tell us, we don't know if one day they'll decide our love is boring and they want to find someone new.

What Lucien had with Jesminda he could have with someone else. Claiming otherwise would be telling every widow that they can't find love again after their partners death.

What Elain had with Graysen she could have with someone else. She thought she had it all because she had love but she was shown the harsh reality of love in the real world, that sometimes love isn't enough and it's not lasting. That is a lesson many of us have learned.

Mating bonds though? They don't exist in the real world so when you have a character claiming "your soul calls out to mine and mine answers", it's clearly greater than love because it's not something you can find with multiple people. In fated mates stories you're lucky to find it with even one. Lucien and Elain have a link to one another that is special regardless of love, regardless of whether she accepts their bond and Lucien clearly respects that, he's treating it like the gift it is by declaring he's a mated male and has no interest in female companionship, when he did everything to ensure Elain's health and happiness. Lucien isn't focused on love when it comes to Elain, he's focused on their souls being intertwined and making sure that she has what she needs even if it doesn't include him. That is the greatest, most selfless act of all. Love is a bit surface level when you think of it because love can be fleeting whereas a soul bond is not. When you fall out of love you often stop putting the other person first. Lucien and Elain aren't in love yet but he's already putting her first, can you imagine what he'd do for her if love were to follow?

And that's where the final quote comes in, a quote that occurs in book two after the characters had been married, "My heart has followed where my soul has led." Ke vo san, I love you."

The bond came first for the MMC and FMC and with it denial and guilt because as the characters mention multiple times "no great gift comes without a price." A well written mating bond is not meant to be a freebie, something you get that you don't still have to work for. You still need to acknowledge the gift of the bond, still treat it with respect, still work towards having earned the persons time and attention. Lucien doesn't deserve Elain's attention because they share a bond, he will have earned her attention because of the respect he continually shows her. And that is how love will follow close behind. At the moment Lucien may not be in love with Elain in the way we define romantic love but he is feeling something he could never feel for another and that fact makes what he is feeling something precious.

#elucien #pro elucien #elain archeron #lucien vanserra #pro lucien vanserra #pro elain archeron #elucien mating bond

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etoilesombre · 3 months ago

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I send you a message asking for fics about 2 weeks ago... i have since read them all and the blacksails brainrot has consumed me. Its not getting better. You were right... 'a month' is not long enough - it will be a decade of me thinking about black sails fulltime at the least.

I have read SO many good fics, honestly this fandom is blessed with great minds and great writers!! Your recommendations were excellent!! (Your fics too)

While going through the flintsilver tag I found a silverflinthamilton fic ('we can lose and call it living') and oh boy did that scratch an itch i didn't know i had!!

So now (after reading silverflint fics for like 2 weeks in all my spare time) I was wondering if you (or you followers!) know any flinthamilton fics. I don't know if that's your jam personally but I would love to read some fics about james and thomas (and possibly miranda) and how their relationship grew!! We see sooo little of it on screen!!

So if you have any recommendations once more, i would appreciate it!!

Hi! really sorry it took me so long to get to this, it has been a hectic week, I hope you see it!! Glad you enjoyed the recs, and I have rounded up some more.

I do read a lot less Flinthamilton(s), but a couple stick out in my mind, and I also crowdsourced some recommendations. I'm going to stick some other miscellaneous pairings on the end as well, in case you feel like further expanding your horizons.

Flintham recs: (most of them are postcanon rather than London era. I too would love more recs for London era.)

The Peaceable Kingdom by kvikindi (~45k words total) A Thomas-at-the-plantation novella length series that is truly beautifully written and engages with some hard, interesting ideas in meaningful ways.

The Sundering Sea by x_art (~140k words) I have not read this one but it comes highly recommended. One thing to note is that it is set post season two and was written in 2015, so BEFORE the ending had aired.

Rip Out All The Epilogues by Thatswherethelightgetsin (~60k words) An AU where both Hamiltons come to Nassau with Flint. This one has a side of Vane/Miranda which is interesting.

A Story Is True/A Story Is Untrue by FletcherHonorama (~210k words) This one is famous and well respected, it's a story told in parallel based on different possible endings, which is a really interesting concept.

Eye of the Beholder by Palebluedot (~2.6k words) Whew, some simple porn to balance out the many thoughtful novels people write for this pairing. They fuck in front of a mirror. It's hot.

5 Times Thomas and James Touched Foreheads Together by daylighthour (~12.5k words) Ok this is my favorite James/Thomas fic of all time, I think about it regularly - and it's rated g, imagine that. It's lovely, and supports my deeply held Autistic Flint headcanon.

NON-Flintham recs:

Ner Tamid by notfelix (~2.7k words) Ok this is technically Silver/Muldoon but it isn't really about that, it's a Jewish John Silver character study complete with cannibalism, oh my. It's great. For ACTUAL Silver/Muldoon I also encourage you to check out the same author's kinkmeme story Taking Care.

Marriage Is For Happy Men by QueerCrusader (~7.5k words) Flintgates, precanon. Flint has to perform a wedding, and has feelings about it. He and his quartermaster spend some quality time together after. This one is SO in character, really makes it work for me.

trust/caution by squidnapped (~5.4k) Also Flintgates. Disaster bottom Flint!! Love of my life!! Just. Just go read it. Trust me. This is one of my favorite fics of all time, also think about it regularly.

theives by ajaxthegreat (~3.7k words) Flintvane after Charles Town. This one is unfinished, but I really love how they talk to each other in it.

like real people do by thegreatblondebalrogslayer (~2k words) Vane is the one who shaves Flint's hair. No porn. You know it's good if I read it and there's no porn.

(If I may be so bold, I wrote Flintvane one time as well, here, try it you might like it)

your legs are the north star by Jaynovz (~3.6k) I can't usually do het at all but it works here. Flintmadi, taking comfort in each other when they're grieving Silver. Love the fealty dynamic, I'm weak for that.

#black sails #PLEASE help me out here y'all #with the flintham and also maybe some ranger crew stuff #it's truly not that i dislike the idea #i just have a very hard time looking away from the thing I'm fixated on #black sails fanfic #fic recs #asks #anon asks #answered

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reallylilyreally · 5 months ago

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Can we do a series? Answer for the whole thing? I'm giving it a go.

I think about "In the Desert Again' all the time, especially Lewis.

So i already answered this for pt1 (here) so this one focuses on Cannot win this war.

My favorite scene

The moment that I realised I have a Latent OT3 Problem:

Four days after the retrieval, Easy’s moved out of their temporary camp, heading back down to Basrah. It’s a long drive. Nix manages three hours of sitting on the bench before lying on his stomach on the floor of the truck.

“I had a lot of concerns while being tortured,” he says conversationally to Liebgott, who is closest to his head. “But I didn't ever consider how undignified travel might be in the aftermath.”

Liebgott does an excellent impression of a man who is unsympathetic. “More concerned about your modelling career, sir?”

“Always, Joe.”

By the time they stop to speak to a small army outpost, most of the men are sitting on the floor with him. Dick puts his head round the back of the truck and just about manages not to grin at the sight of them. Nix is asleep, presumably, with Tab and Liebgott by his head and the rest of them sprawled around him.

“Want to switch places, sir?” Tab asks, voice low.

Dick shakes his head, even though he'd much rather be here in the back of the truck with Nix than in a seat in the cab, and Tab knows it. “Better not,” he says. “I'm on the hook with Sink half the time and dealing with paperwork the other half. Let me know if he needs anything when he wakes.”

Tab nods, and Dick turns to leave, then pauses. “Put something under his head,” he says, refuses to sound embarrassed by the request, and leaves.

Tab takes his jacket off, folds it neatly and then very, very gently lifts Nix's head and slides the fabric under his cheek. Nix shifts a little and Tab rests his hand in the dark mess of hair, gentle and soothing, until he's sure Nix is properly back to sleep. Liebgott makes a derisive noise in the back of his throat, but he's thankfully quiet about it.

“Not you too,” he says, and rolls his eyes.

Tab gives him a sharp look. “He saved my life,” he whispers. “Twice. He saw the RPG and he yelled bail and I bailed, and then after being blown to fuck with all of about thirty seconds to come up with something, he managed to make it so I didn't die in the sand or spend days being tortured. He was so fucking quick you would not believe, Joe. And he went through hell, you saw the state of him. Forgive me for thinking he might deserve a little softness right now.”

Joe's quiet. “You're forgiven.”

With a strong second place to "Dick Winters hooked up with random men to practice in case he ever got to fuck the love of his life" because that's the most outrageous thing i've ever written.

My favorite chapter (if it's a multichapter)

ch5. It's got everything! Female characters, proposals, people being angry at authority, PTSD nightmares, ambiguous bedroom situations ft Don Malarkey, and ensemble shenanigans.

Hardest scene to write

The ending. I just suck at them!

Favorite character to write in the fic

KITTY WELSH, she who must be adored, always.

Favorite dynamic to write in the fic

This one I think my favourite dynamic is Easy as a whole. I fucking LOVE an ensemble piece, the whole reason i'm in this fandom is for The Squad. I love those moments in the show when the boys are sniping at each other and it feels so Real and authentic and I really hope i captured that a little.

Why I chose that title

Again, Brendan James' Hero's Song. Just... such a powerful and emotive piece of music.

A fun fact about the fic

I had no plot planned! and it shows! Also i was one strong drink away from making it an OT3. that shows too.

#ask games #fanfic #band of brothers #bunny belongs in that bed

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animereviewsbykyranskye · 1 year ago

Text

My current top 15 Anime and why

Because why the fuck not. I'm doing top 15 so that I have some variety behind it. Otherwise I would just be gushing non stop XD

Apparently numbers go big now - AND THEY GO SMALLER IF YOU TRY TO TYPE IN THE SAME LINE AS THEM???

comparison:

15 -

DA HECK????

(Edit: I was going to colour all the numbers because I wanted a rainbow. WHY THE FUCK FOR THEY CHANGE TO SMALL WHEN YOU COLOUR THEM??????)

Guess the titles of the anime get a small heading. Anyways. Onto the actual list!

Technoroid OVERMIND

Ayo. Starting out with a really random one. So if anyone were to look at my Anilist then they might be a bit confused. I decided I'd keep movies out of here as well as anything I haven't specifically finished. Also takt op. Destiny needs a re evaluation.

Anyways. This premise is so sick and I feel like they managed it really well. The characters were all really fun and the music was fantastic which is honestly the most important thing about Idol shows. I really like idol shows but often struggle with the stupid drama in them that just leads to seasons upon seasons that didn't need to happen or wouldn't actually happen.

In this they're just androids. The fantasy twist works so well for the genre and I honestly don't know why it isn't done more often. This way they can bullshit the drama and it actually makes sense.

Honestly my favourite character was Kite. He was great and his voice always gave me shivers. Especially his piece in the closing. Damn.

I don't want to go into full reviews with this, rather just gushing about things I like and stuff. I really don't think this got the recognition it deserves - probably because of it's deviation from the norm - but it would be cool to get some sort of sequel.

(Edit: There's a manga releasing apparently. Imma check that out.)

UniteUp!

Continuing on with the trend of idol animes apparently. UniteUp! was so good. As I mentioned in my Reviews while I watch of the show, it felt so grounded and real that other idol shows just don't seem to capture. These were all real people with real problems dealing with real life.

I also like how we had such a large cast of characters but it never really felt overwhelming as they focused on group dynamics and specific individuals rather than trying to cram every single person into their own arcs.

Once again the music was fantastic and by god was this show pretty gay. Honestly I don't know what the sentiments of others are, but the Anela duo definitely weren't straight and neither were Akira and Daiki. That bath scene says it all.

Anyways. If you want a fun time with a really solid idol anime, please check it out. I saw earlier that we're getting a season two soon. I am so looking forward to it.

Trigun Stampede

Damn! I don't even know what to really say about this one. The visuals are absolutely stunning - there is no doubt about that. The score and the characters are excellent. And how dare they leave us on that cliff hanger.

I have absolutely no history with this story and still need to watch and read the originally but I am really looking forward to seeing how the story adapts between the three.

You can ask my partner. I've already said we're watching everything trigun related as soon as we are done with our current show.

I'm really looking forward to season two. And especially seeing how this all pans out. Apparently there will be tears according to the fandom. Concern.

Re-main

Damn this show came out of nowhere for me. I watched it quite awhile ago and have been meaning to rewatch it again.

The premise is definitely a sports anime but honestly so different. All because of one thing. The fact that he is an amnesiac is such a fascinating concept to work with - especially with how he was before (trying not to spoil - can't remember when this comes up in the anime)

And then the ending?? Damn. They seriously set up that cliff hanger and I really hope this show gets a sequel.

I really can't say too much about it without giving away some spoilers but damn does it change up the formula and do it so fucking well.

Given

Given is great. Such a pure but heartbreaking portrayal of love on one side with such conflicting but also nurturing views on the other. Having the different realtionships throughout this is really well done how they all bounce off of each other. Especially when they entertwine it with the music.

As it is said. That is how they communicate - through the music.

I'm busy catching up with the manga and really hope the anime continues with it.

Also the fucking is just fucking gorgeous. It has no write to hit you that hard.

Also - something else that shouldn't be allowed to hit you that hard. Damn Mafuyu has had a difficult past. We love how he learns to heal and grow with Uenoyama at his side.

Anyways, moving on.

Bakuten!!

Okay. Who said a sports anime could be this pretty.

I love the art style and the music throughout all of this. I love the portayal and the evolution of these character - seriously all their arcs are great. The interactions of the team is so tangible and real.

I watch a lot of sports anime and I often struggle with some of the drama used within the sports - it feels like the only thing that ever fuels the story is the matches. Whereas in Bakuten - the character seriously fuel the story. You can understand their motivations much more than just - I want to play this sport and be the best!

I also feel like they really captured everything really well in the movie. The whole concept of wanting to sore is great and really well executed.

I also love the interactions they have with the other team. It's not just a once off competition or practice match that they face each other. We actually get tangible characters for the whole team and see how much they two teams are similar to one another. It's a very healthy rivalry that isn't normally this expanded on in sports anime.

Sasaki and Miyano

Yesssssss. These two are just absolutely amazing. Their whole story arc and relationship is just tooth rottingly sweet. They bounce off of each other so well.

And I love the fact of how slow the actual story is. They meet at the start of Miyanos first year (from what I know - I still need to read the novels) and sasaki's second and they only end up confessing just before graduation happens. It really plays out well and is so healthy.

There is no problematic elements like in so many BL stories which is such a breath of fresh air. And the fact that sasaki is very specific about making sure to maintain boundaries to ensure that miyano is comfortable is also excellent.

On a slightly different note - I still need to see the Hirano and Kagiura movie. Been dying to watch it. I've been keeping up to date with both manga and both of these stories are amazing. I love the dichotomy of the two stories and how they are coming to their own realisations of their feelings in honestly very different ways.

I also recently watched the dub of the anime due to some videos on tiktok. Fucking hell it is absolutely hilarious. Kellen Goff as Sasaki has no reason for being that good. Seriously. Damn.

Link Click

On a completely different note. Damn this one makes you questions your own morals and reality as you know it.

I really don't want to get into this one much as I do believe watching it blind is the best way to go.

The art style is fantastic and that opening hits like a truck it is so good. The characters just click (pun not intended) and you just understand their motivations and don't know which side to side with most of the time. It brings about such high moral dilemmas that will seriously mess with your brain sometimes and there is one episode that will likely make you cry.

Anyways. Season 2 has just started airing and I am so ready for it.

Buddy Daddies

Why did a show about two queer platonic dudes who adopt a child while beings assassins hit so damn hard.

The show jumps between episodes with backstory and episodes with them just being good dads and it is balanced so well. This anime won't end up getting a sequel most likely with how it ended but damn I wouldn't say no to one.

Rei is my favourite character and I relate to him far too much. His interactions with the world are so fascinating and his whole arc with Miri is honestly some of the best media I've seen.

I absolutely loved watching this show weekly and it always brightened up my day when I realised a new episode would be up.

If you would like further thoughts on this one then check the Reviews while I watch on it for more chaos.

No Game No Life

So. This was the first ever anime that I ever watched. It was a random recomendation from a friend. Look at where we are today.

This show is honestly just so fun. The characters are silly and the whole plot is just absolute chaos. I really enjoy the games aspect and how it was all incorporated into the world.

I can't even really say much about it. It is just a guilty pleasure of mine and will always hold a special place in my heart.

Also. Please can it just get a second season already.

Assassination Classroom

So. Unlike everything else on the list - this one I only finished really recently. My partner and I were watching it together. And to put it out there straight away. I cried. That ending was far too emotional.

I really enjoyed the humour throughout the whole thing as well as the constant underlying dread of the whole situation.

They also really played out Koro-senseis backstory really well. The teasing to it was excellent. I must say though that one of the twists seriously came out of left field. Like damn.

I've just recently bought the boxset and am reading through the manga. Once again. It's absolutely amazing.

Also the openings of them all jumping are absolutely fucking hilarious and you can't tell me otherwise.

If you want to know what officially sold me on the show was just in the first episode. (Note we watched in dub)

Don't ask me why but I found this to be the most hilarious thing ever. The absurdity and the line delivery was magnificent. I annoy my partner by quoting it atleast once a day.

Life Lessons with Uramichi Oniisan

Speaking of comedies. This show has no right to be this good. The absudist dead pan comedy in the middle of whats meant to be a TV show is such a random premise but just works so well.

Due to the nature of the show, the characters are extremely relateable. I especially love Kumatani and Kikaku.

If your on the same side of anime tiktok that I am then you have definitely seen/heard snippets of the dub.

I think this was the first anime that I originally watched in sub and then tried it in dub and actually enjoyed it. (I often find that whatever I originally watched it in is the only one I can watch it in - it's very difficult for me to change it)

The voice acting on both sides just works perfectly for the show. And that final episode and how they did it was the best thing ever.

Please just give it a try.

Angel Beats

Okay. Time for a hard hitter. This comedy like assassintaion classroom is fucking excellent but will make you cry, like damn.

In complete and utter contrast to No game no life, this was the second anime I had ever watched. I had found a video that gave some suggestions and thought I would give this one a try. When I say it destoryed me, I mean it literally. I constantly think about the end of this and I absolutely love revisiting it.

The twist and turns along the way are fascinating and I love how each one alters the characters and the narrative. Each of the characters feel unique - even the lesser developed side characters - with fascinating and complex backstories.

The whole thing just makes you question your own place in life.

Moriarty the Patriot

Another one I just randomly tried because I saw a video on tiktok. The first episode immediately pulled me in. I thought it was just going to be some simple detective story (At the time I didn't know much about Sherlock Holmes and who Moriaty was so I didn't have any of that to guide me into this story.) But nope.

I keep saying this but in this one I really mean it. The characters are built so well. The dichotomy between William and Sherlock - as the fandom would probably agree - is just amazing. How they bounce off of each other - i don't even know how to really descirbe it.

Honestly just go watch it.

And if you enjoyed the anime - please go check out the manga too. If the anime was done well - then the manga is done to lamost perfection.

This show was what got me into reading and then eventually buying manga. I now have every single one that is out.

Yuri!!! on ICE

Did I make the title gay? Yes.

Okayyyyy. This is just going to be me going on about how much I love this show. Bare with me.

So I was in an anime watching slump just before I picked up this show. I had been seeing some videos popping up talking about it and decided to give it a try (this was in 2020)

I immediately fell in love with this show. Literally everything about it. I ended up rewatching it three times over the course of a week. It got to a point where I was so upset that there wasn't more content for it that I just cried for half a day. (Ask my partner - it was chaos)

This show is the reason I now read fanfiction - all because I found a way to technically have more content for it.

This show holds such an important place in my heart that I sincerely cannot express it properly.

If you've never watched it - go give it a try. It would mean a lot - and hopefully one day we might get a season two.

----

Thanks for reading, if you managed to get to this point. I find it interesting how my explanations managed to slowly get shorter throughout the list as I just started becoming more emotional than factual.

I hope you enjoyed it and maybe grabbed a recommendation or two. If you'd like to know more or hear me ramble on more about anything in particular then please let me know.

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stepmarchen · 7 months ago

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first off my apologies for this as i feel it's an overrated thing for the ASM fandom, but i would love your take on the historical fashion shown in the manhwa, the references to real life and the anachronistic choices to boot. i hope you're not too bothered by this! also love your thoughts on asm lol

no worries at all! i'm not the greatest history buff so i'm going to have to say sorry in advance too

anyway, i just looooove the historical world building/fashion in ASM! I think it's one of the best period-inspired comics in the "historical" genre despite it being inspired by multiple different historical time periods. get ready because... i have a lot to say.

now i wouldn't call myself a huge stickler for historical accuracy but personally, i like to feel totally transported to another time when i'm reading a period piece. And a lot of "princess" manhwa often take loose inspiration from history given that they're also in the fantasy YA genre.

here's what i mean.

the isekai genre inherently caters towards young women and selling "the fantasy" that is "we want to make you feel like a princess". While historical accuracy is super cool, there's a certain amount of modernization needed to appeal to the modern audience.

Changes might include: modern hollywood curls over a powdered wig with ringlet curls, the hourglass silhoutte over the historically accurate higher waister silhouette, or stylish stilettos over buckled mules (you get it)

a huge percentage of isekai/fantasy manga/manhwa do this (even to the extreme) and most of the time, it works (some examples below).

The problem is when it isn't intentional. ie: Artists going for the "historically accurate" route and fail to use props that suit the intended setting (not going to show examples, sorry)

ASM does a wonderful job at keeping to the historically accurate theme with the 19th century inspired fashion. And the only real anachronistic choice is the "anime hair" (which I think we can all stand by).

In particular, this panel of Theo trying on his new outfit for the gala really surprised me. It's the first time I've seen a male character wearing century accurate justacorps, breeches, and heels.

Something else I love is the style preferences between different characters, in relation to their age, status, and personality. It's even mentioned vocally by the characters! ie: Rachel wishing she could wear a bustle like Shuri, Shuri opting for "younger styles" now that she has been reborn, and Nora/Jeremy dressing freely (because boys will be boys).

The Empress (and Heidi) wear larger, more extravagant silhouettes, politically symbolic jewelry, and updos fitting of their high status. You can really feel the weight and layers that they're wearing, making them clear figures of power. It's an excellent design choice while staying true to the time period.

Meanwhile, Shuri often wears lighter dresses with less volume and simple accents as opposed to the flair of the royals or the youthful embellishments (like ribbbons or bows) of younger unmarried girls like Ohara.

HOWEVER! I have a growing theory that ORKA likes to use dresses as a narrative device. I think that ORKA styles Shuri in ribbons and "younger" styles instead of her common looks during romantic scenes to remind us readers that she really is just a girl inside, not anyone's mother.

I'm super eager to see how the fashion evolves as we move through Season 3! In the latest chapters, Shuri is starting to wear narrower silhouettes, suggestive of the coming turn of the century.

Also, with the characters growing up, we will probably get different male outfits (as opposed to Jeremy's typical knights training uniform and Nora's basic look).

Thanks for listening to my rant!

#a stepmother's marchen #the fantasie of a stepmother #stepyapping #askstepmarchen #young johannes also had some great looks

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