#I have adopted zero cats

[songbirdstew]

This is just a cat complaint blog

Glitch is a hunter. She eats everything she kills. Because we don't want her killing birds, we keep her inside now. Because she eats actual vermin, we give her a preventive worming pill. (She's called Glitch because she's full of bugs.) She used to be THE BEST GIRL at taking her pill. I wrapped it in a pill pocket and she would gulp it down and ask for more pill pockets. That worked the first three times. Now she refuses to have anything to do with the pill and nothing I try is working. Fuck yo pill pocket. Fuck yo fish paste. Fuck yo wet food. We do have a pill plunger, but I was hoping to avoid it, thinking it might make things harder in the long run, but at this point, I think it's our only option.

(And if you're wondering, Does she really need the pill if she's an indoor cat now? Reader, every time I think the same thing, she comes trotting down the hall, tail waving like a flag, with a fucking rodent screaming in terror in her mouth. I'm glad she disposes of them so that I don't have to [make Curtis do it], but it does have its own set of complications. And yes she gets flea meds, too.)

A few weeks ago she came down with a bout of cystitis. So we've had to spend a couple weeks giving her pain meds, switch to a different litter, switch to wet food. Thankfully she likes the fancy litter and she took to it immediately & stopped peeing on the couch. Both girls are picky about the wet food they get (bitch, you eat mummified shrews, the fuck you on about. Eat your goddamn pate.) She's doing much better now. But between the lack of infection and her ever-present bald patch, the vet said it's clear she's suffering ongoing anxiety. She recommended trying other things before resorting to Prozac, but also was realistic about it maybe being impossible to actually figure out what all the problems are and how to address all of them.

She's adjusted well to being indoors, as long as she can look out the front screen door. As soon as it got too cold to leave the front door open, she started panicking. We made space for her to look out the picture window, but she like. Has no self esteem. And she thinks she can't jump that high. Reader, she can. It took her a while to learn how to jump, and she seems scared of heights, but she recently figured out how to get up on the bathroom counter, and the shelf by the window is the exact same height. She got as close as putting her front paws on the middle shelf and crying once. Curtis brought in a speaker cabinet that's exactly half the height of the top shelf, so now she has a booster step. It took a few days, but I finally saw her hop on the booster and then onto the shelf to look out the window. ... It was night.

She's up there right now, but she's sitting the wrong way.

Turn around, ya dingus:

We know a huge source of her stress is Charlie. We think Glitch would love to be friends with Charlie, but Charlie Hates Everyone, especially Glitch. We do have pheromone diffusers, and they do really help. Vet said in her personal experience, the collars do not help that much, especially if your cats already hate wearing a collar. We got them some Composure treats, and those also seem to help. Unfortunately, they made Charlie bold enough to come into the kitchen specifically to steal Glitch's food. 🫠 Which is not helpful when Glitch is snubbing her food bc there's tapeworm medicine in it. 🫠🫠🫠

During her cystitis, we let her outside supervised a few times. It seemed comforting for her to go potty outside in the dirt again, and to eat a bunch of grass. I have a couple starters of oat grass and catnip seeds going now, so they can both have fresh greens indoors. The wheat just sprouted. I might have to start over with the catnip.

If anyone else needs a suggestion on giving their anxious cat a busy toy, I scattered some of Glitch's favorite treats into the bottom half of an egg carton. The cups are just deep and narrow enough that she doesn't want to eat right out of it, so she has to figure out other ways to get the treats out. It's lightweight enough that she can bat it around and pick it up and fling it over and over. If the treats go flying, she gets to hunt them down. I can tell she thinks I'm EXTREMELY RUDE to do this to her, but it keeps her occupied for a good 20 minutes, and she gets treats.

TL;DR cats are terrible don't get one

Or. Only get one. Don't get two.

[blue-banditt]

I'm gonna kayemess fr this time

[duskythesomething]

if i'm not allowed to say "eww" at other people's "normal" animals then they shouldn't be allowed to say it about my hermit crabs or snake. it's equally rude :/

[villain-in-love]

Writing headcanons about Liang and Zero in situations where they are not in Nanba feels so weird… Like, there’s also a lot of stuff that can happen, and there’s a lot of things they can’t do while stuck in prison under strict surveillance, but the whole point of Nanbaka is that it’s a manga about prison, and that’s why it constantly feels like something is missing.

[thetangibleghost]

All the stuffies I have

[parkersbliss]

the 141 and the really weird or random quirks I’ve decided they had

pairing: task force 141 (ghost, gaz, price, soap) x female reader 

warnings: suggestive content, like sexual content but not smut

a/n: I have zero reason for doing this expect I wanted too?? and got carried away with suggestive aspects of it which is funny cause I don't write smut lmfaooo. so mostly fluff and based off real quirks people I know have.

Masterlist | Taglist | Prompt List

requests open for tf141!

—

Price:

no matter how many times he cleans the bathroom, his beard hair is everywhere. obviously he keeps that shit well groomed but it’s always somehow stuck on your face after you wash it, or on your shower loofah or towel. and you've tried and he’s tried to clean it and it never works. 

loves gnomes. you have ones in the garden, the front yard, in your house for EVERY occasion. I’m talking christmas, easter, halloween, thanksgiving. he has a set for every season and it honestly scares you a little. one year he bought a giant one for your christmas tree as the topper and it made him so happy so you just accepted it.

doesn’t like to celebrate his birthday. He’s so much of a giver he downplays it every year. If you guys have kids, he’ll buy something for them ON HIS DAY just to take the attention off. so he kind of hates gifts, but he’s not going to not accept that. Would prefer you don’t, even though he bought you a $20K pearl necklace for your birthday. (You’re still afraid to wear it)

leaves you on heard. all. the. time. you ask him something, like as he’s sitting next to you and just … silence. sometimes he even nods, looks at you and then turns away. you’re not sure if it’s something to do with his hearing or he’s just so relaxed at home he just doesn’t comprehend sometimes. “hey, baby, what do you want for dinner?” “mm.” 

average dad experience of sharing a hotel room and brother is snoring. you know what I’m talking about? the cold A.C turning on and off and mf just be out and it’s so loud you have to wear ear plugs. you wonder if he has sleep apnea at some point bc he can’t be real. 

but don’t worry, he’s just as loud in bed bed ;) and he makes it known when you’re going at it 

Ghost:

too stealthy for his own good and always scares the shit out of you. and he’ll try to be loud too, knocking on doors AND still isn’t loud enough. He always feel so bad but it’s also so funny to him bc he really does try to not be so quiet. 

owns the same black t-shirt, like at least 5, but claims one of them is just softer and better than the others. you’ve tried them all on and there is no difference to which he mumbled something about you not having the special sense??

cat whisperer. you’ll adopt a cat while he’s gone bc you’re lonely and you spend all the time with the cat but no. cat loves ghost more. He’ll sleep on top of ghost, but never you. he’ll follow ghost around the house, but not you. it’s very infuriating. and ghost has no idea why bc he’s around 1/2 the time you are. 

has a whole cabinet for his bourbon collection. and a special glass cup AND special spherical ice for it. he doesn’t even drink that often, but it was absolutely necessary (to him). 

he’s a clean freak. very routine in how and when he does laundry. Bed sheets on this day, dark on this day, etc. he won’t let you do any of it. If he loses a sock, he throws out the other pair. as soon as there’s a hole in something, he throws it out. 

nov. 1st is christmas to him. the tree is already up, no questions asks. there are no thanksgiving decoration in this house. he also has multiple trees, one by the entrance, one in the living room, one in your bedroom. 

has definitely fucked you under the christmas lights by the fire. begs you to wear bow lingerie so he can quite literally “unwrap his best gift” 

Gaz: 

loves the lego car sets. his home office is decorated with all his medals AND the lego cars. has definitely left pieces out that you stepped on and then proceeded to scream his ear off.

begs you to play fortnite with him. you think he’s batshit crazy “that’s literally your actual job” “no but the raging kids makes it fun and we can match skins” (he means the banana skins btw) and he’s a troll. he doesn’t take the game seriously, he just wants to torture little kids and make fun of you when you can’t figure out where the shooting is coming from. or when you throw down a med kit instead of splash. 

cannot get through a movie without fucking you and it’s always during the good parts so he’s got you in doggy and you’re still trying to watch the movie??

Instigator fr. he’s not toxic but like he’s gonna argue. Has literally once said to you “I’m not arguing I’m just explaining why I’m right” to which you stared at him and asked if he was stupid 

always ask for hot sauce or sriracha at restaurants or if he can get something spicer. he eats buldok noodles with the whole sauce packet and then proceeds to sit in the bathroom for an hour while you scold him. 

reckless driver to the max. you fear for your life when you’re in a car with him. He speeds (within reason he claims), he makes quick merges and switches lanes fast. he does use a turn signal so you let it slide bc he’s risky but not THAT risky. 

obviously, he has horrible road rage. you’ll be calling him while he’s driving and it’s all normal and then “OI YOU FUCKING SHITE DO YOU HAVE A LICENSE?” you just sigh and then he answers you like normal, “yeah I think I’m out of toothpaste too.” 

saves every selfie of you from snap and his rotating ones as his wallpaper. even the ugly ones you beg him to take out. like any guy, he’ll claim it’s his favorite and then it’s a 0.5 of you eating ice cream and it’s dripping everywhere and your eyes are half closed. 

Soap: 

leaves sticky notes everywhere to remind himself of things. anything. “need olive oil” “missing one blue sock” “(Y/N) wants thai takeout” “call ghost” “laundry” 

and sometimes they’re not even correlated to where it should be. like the note that just says “laundry” will be in the kitchen. and he stacks on top of those sticky notes with more. “did laundry” “bought more socks” it drives you insane

he's obsessed with blankets. He has a designated like basket/bin or blankets in the living room and your bedroom. He sleeps with like three. and he’s got heated ones, sherpa ones, weighted ones, etc. absolutely collects the different printed ones for each holiday. 

loves to go decor shopping with you, but only because he wants to pick out the ugliest things and see your reaction as you swat at him and tell him to put it back. only for him to sneak it back into the cart and you death glare him. 

If you need to rant, he resumes the whole “omg girl, period.” personality. he loves gossip and he loves doing facemasks with you as you talk shit and drama about your coworkers. 

he's so “wait I have to tell my gf this” bro will literally be on a mission and gets a cut? “I have to tell (Y/N).” the room exploded? would take a selfie and send it to you, if possible. sees a weird shaped potato at the grocery store? Sends a picture. Falls down the stairs? you're getting a picture of his broken foot. hard? here's a dick pic just for you babe

uses the same hydroflask water bottle that’s dented, has sticker residue and chipping on all side. “It’s reusable, that’s the point” he claims. you're not sure if he’s ever washed it and you certainly aren’t going to open it and find out for him. 

[lassieposting]

anyway jaskier is like. basically the human equivalent of those wild animals someone feeds who've lost all fear of people and now just break into houses to eat out of the trash and chill in the pool

he's been travelling with a witcher since he was 18. he has zero fear of any of them. he associates witchers with Having Things Done For Him and Being Provided For and Give Love. he has no reservations whatsoever about going up to any random witcher he happens to pass when geralt isn't around and asking them to help him with something or do something for him or just. trailing after them for a while because he knows if he whines perfectly on pitch they'll hunt his dinner and store his shit in their horse's saddlebags and keep him safe on the road, even if they're grumpy about it. at kaer morhen he is like the stray cat geralt fed one time and now everyone is just like "well he lives here now i guess". it just Does Not Occur to him that he might ever be in danger with a witcher around. this is a man who finds things lying around in the kaer morhen lab and just fucking. eats them

anyway. those "please do not feed the animals it teaches them to approach people" signs but. for jaskier and the oxenfurt students who start trying to imitate him and adopt a witcher

[ilythena]

Request: Jack and Luke go to an animal shelter to adopt a pet (cat or dog, which ever is your favorite) and Jack falls for the adoption counselor that helps them pick out the perfect pet

𝐀𝐍𝐈𝐌𝐀𝐋 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑 | 𝐉𝐀𝐂𝐊 𝐇𝐔𝐆𝐇𝐄𝐒

★SUM after Luke begs Jack to get a dog, he ends up lucky in more ways then one.

Fem!reader, straight fluff, no warnings! Kinda short tho, tbh I got too interested in Luke begging Jack for a dog 😭 req are open so don’t be shy to send in some, almost done w a lot of them just gotta find time to post em <3

♪ DIAMOND BOY - SZA

“Can you just hear me out-��� “no.” “Please! Just one!”

Sitting on the bed in Jacks room of their shared apartment, Jack throws his head back with an irritated groan. “Luke, I’m not going to keep arguing with you about this shit. We can’t have a dog. Who’s going to watch it? And clean up after it? We’re both professional hockey players and have zero time for an animal.”

With a pout, Luke hesitates before speaking again. “I’ll clean up after them! And I’ll spend all the time with them!” “Luke no. We have a game tomorrow. Go to bed.”

“Why am I even asking! I’m a grown man. I’ll just get one and bring it home.” “I wish you fucking would.”

Luke storms out of Jacks room and heads to his own. Immediately getting on his phone and ranting to Quinn about his problems, Jack turns his body and sighs.

“…what’s going on with the Hughes’?” “Apparently Jack said no to a dog. Luke’s not taking the rejection well.”

The two brothers glare at each other from across the locker room, Luke tightening his laces and Jack grabbing his stick. He mouths an ‘I’m not changing my mind. No dog.’ And Luke huffs before walking out.

“…..well, he’ll get over it soon.” Nico says, patting Jack on the back and he just frowns. “Why is he so insistent on a pet all of a sudden? I mean, you understand why I’m saying no right?”

“Yes, I understand. But I can also see his side. You two will come to a compromise eventually. Let’s not worry about this stuff and just focus on trying to win the game tonight, okay?” Nico says and with a nod, both boys walk out of the room and onto the ice.

Everything was going well at first, Jack had even scored a goal! But it’s like this week just wasn’t on his side. The opposing team began crushing them after the first quarter, swiftly taking out their team with a score of 3-1.

On top of the crushing loss, it was pouring rain outside. And his umbrella broke, which meant he had to walk in the rain, with his brother who’s mad at him, after he loses a game. Great.

Both boys get to the car cold and covered in water—not a word spoken between the two. Luke closes his door shortly after Jack does and it’s pure silence between the two. Jack starts the car and turns the heat up to the max before driving off and making his way home.

“Hey luke?” “…yeah?” “I’m sorry. I’ve been really stressed out and honestly I don’t think it’s good for us to be arguing over something so stupid. Maybe we should get something to eat-” bark! Jack’s eyes snap over to Luke and suddenly it feels like the car is at 100 degrees.

“What was that.” “What was what…?” Bark! Comes from Luke’s side of the car once again, this time Jack can faintly see something moving inside of his jacket.

“Luke.” “….listen! Do you see how hard and cold it it outside? Poor thing would have freezed to death out there!” “I told you no dogs!” “Look at her!”

Luke pulls the small puppy out from his jacket and you can see her shaking. Wet, cold, and obviously very lost.

“…what do we do now?” Jack whispers and Luke doesn’t answer, pulling the animal closer to his chest. After a moment of discussing what to do, the boys decide to just go home and sleep for the night.

“Hi, welcome in… how can I help you?” “We wanna adopt this dog-“ “no we don’t.”

Jack pushes Luke behind him and gently snatches the puppy from his hands, a sharp gasp cutting through the air when Luke feels the shove.

“Oh! Where did you find them?” “On the street, my brother couldn’t help but pick them up.” You gently take the animal out of Jack’s hands and inspect them for a second before looking him in the eyes. “I’ll have to do a cleaning and a check up for them, since they’re very dirty and I want to make sure the dog is healthy before I give them to you.”

Jack glances at you and when you two make eye contact all the anger he had directed towards Luke died down immediately in his throat. He quietly nodded and in less than a second, you were gone and in the back.

Another one of your coworkers came and got their information, and Jack had sat next to Luke in the small waiting area.

“…can we please keep the dog-“ “maybe.”

After what seemed like hours, you walk out with the dog put in a small kennel, handing it to your coworker. “Good news, puppy is very healthy! Bad news, you can’t keep her because she’s microchipped, which means she does have an owner.” Luke groans in disappointment, but his eyes flicker over to another dog playing through the window in a designated play area.

Jack notices this, and after standing there for a while, he speaks. “….are any of the dogs over there up for adoption?” “Yes sir! All the animals on the right side of the building are up for adoption. Are you interested in adopting today?”

“Um, yes.” Luke’s head snaps over into Jack’s direction. “That’s great! I’ll let you two look at the animals, and let me know if you decide to adopt.”

As you walk away, Jack looks at Luke and glares. “Don’t get too happy. I’m picking the dog.”

“Hello Mr. Hughes, how may I help you today?” “Hey. I know this is really sudden, but I think he’s sick! He’s been throwing up a lot.”

Jack drags in a golden retriever, who his brother named ‘Jett’ and he doesn’t look to well. Slouching and obviously very tired.

“Oh no! Here, follow me. I’ll get him onto the inspection table and I’ll check what’s wrong with him.” He follows you down the hallway with the puppy in his arms and sets him down gently onto the cold metal table.

Watching you take a stethoscope and check up his heartbeat and trying to listen into his stomach, his heart briefly stops when you call in your coworker to do an x-ray on the animal.

After getting sent to the waiting room and waiting an hour, his worried face shifts to confusion when Jett quickly runs out the door and in between Jack’s legs.

“So, I thought he had an infection in his stomach from some sort of food, but as soon as I officially set up the x-ray and tried to put him under it, he refused and went from looking sick to looking completely fine. My diagnosis is that he was trying to get your attention by being dramatic.”

Jack scoffs in disbelief and looks down at the golden ball of fur in between his feet, shaking his head and rolling his eyes.

“Wow. So I brought him here for nothing?” “Pretty much.” You try to hold back a laugh but fail miserably, smiling at the animal and preparing the register for his bill.

“Well, at least he’s okay! That’s all that matters.” You say and Jack lets out a brief chuckle before looking down at the machine.

“150 dollars?!” “Unfortunately, He did waste the supplies used to prep the x-ray machine…”

“Back again, Mr. Hughes?” “He was eating grass, I’m concerned he’s sick.” “You said that the last time you came in.”

It’s been about 4 months since Jack officially adopted Jett, and coincidentally his owners been coming into your clinic non stop for those past 4 months.

“I’m just looking out for him, what kind of owner would I be if I just let everything slide under the rug?” He grins and you scoff with a smile before leading him and his dog into a private room so you can “investigate” the problem with Jett.

The happy dog jumps up onto the table and rolls over, making a happy sort of huffing noise when you rub his stomach. After doing regular check up procedures, you can determine that there’s absolutely nothing wrong with Jett.

“As usual, there’s nothing wrong with your dog. Why do you keep coming in here when you know he’s fine?” Jett jumps on you and you can’t hold back a laugh when he jumps down onto the floor and stands in a playing position. You open the door to the dog play area and let him out to go socialize with the other dogs that stay in the clinic.

“Maybe I just wanna see the cute girl who works here.” “Well maybe there’s an easier way for you to do that instead of dragging him along with you and wasting your money.” Jack bites his lip into a smile and slowly walks closer to you with his hands into his pocket.

“Does that mean that maybe I can take you out on a date this weekend?” “Maybe it does.” You lean against the counter that holds all the paperwork and files in the clinic and take out a small slip of paper, writing something down on it before shoving it into his hands and walking back into a ‘staff only’ facility.

“ xxx-xxx-xxxx. I’ll see you this weekend, Hughes. ;)”

————————————————————————

I would have added my pink banner BUT I ran out of picture space….. sorry this ended so suddenly, I was struggling w how to end it!

© copyright of ilythena. Do not repost or translate onto any other websites.

[luxthestrange]

MASHLE Incorrect quotes#45 Siblings

When you found out...Ryoh had gf way into the past in your and Ryoh's student days-

In the Principals office you are being lectured once again on your potential but not wanting to participate in becoming a visionary like your older brother

Grantz!Y/n: You're wasting your time, Great value Dumbledore, I'm not a Divine Visionary material

Cut to a full shot of the room, Ryoh and Beautiful girl stand near the entrance

Ryoh: Understatement of the year~ Y/n, Gf/n. Gf/n, Y/n

She raises her hand to wave, Her and Ryoh’s hands are interlocked.

Grantz!Y/n: What in the fuck knuckles is this?

Ryoh: She's my girlfriend, you intolerant shit-

Grantz!Y/n: Whoa! Pump the hate brakes, Fox & Friends~ I'm just surprised anyone would date you, Especially Applejack from My Little Pony~

You wink at her, She smiles

GF: I like them~

Ryoh: Give them a chance, It's great seeing you like this~

-Current time tho-

Renatus: I don’t think we should be focusing on Y/n, That Mage brain is a bag full of cats, You can smell crazy on them

Ryoh: Have a care how you speak, Y/n is beyond reason, but they're a gifted graduate under Wahlberg tutelage And my little sibling

Orter: They killed 80 agents of innocent zero in two days

Ryoh: They're adopted...

Part 3 of:

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for taking pictures of my sister's house and not deleting them?

I (25f) and my adopted sister L (also 25) have grown up together since we were babies and are extremely close. I truly love her and want the best for her.

She has been married for 5 years to D (25m). They dated since they were 18 and got married at 20. I never had an issue with him except at times I thought he was immature. They have a kid together who is adorable and about to turn 3.

However, as they have been married i have an issue with him. I don't hate anyone, but he is highest on my shit list. Not an exhaustive list but he has (and I want to make this clear THESE ARE THINGS I HAVE WITNESSED I AM NOT LISTING THINGS SHE ONLY HAS TOLD ME ABOUT):

Whenever they argue yells at her. Even in front of guests (ahem me). She'll yell back and then he gets upset she is "raising her voice" at him, when he started it.

He won't let her get a job. He has canceled her applications for jobs before. She has sold some stuff online until he sold the materials she used to make things. Her only "income" is if he decides to give her an allowance and transfer money from his account to hers (please note they have BOTH their names on the accounts but one is considered hers one his). If she takes money from his account he gets mad. Bills, groceries, etc. Come from "her" account

Was always sweet but now uses her as jokes to his friends. Demeans her in front of them.

They move a state over after they got married, almost 5 hours away. Doable in one day, but many don't like to do it. Since being married, she has effectively not seen any of her friends except when they come into town to visit. I have went to visit her and one of her friends did, that friend confided they did not feel comfortable or welcome. That doesn't bother me cause personally I don't give a shit what D thinks and am there for my sister and nephew. But I have overheard D talk bad about all her friends, even me, snd encourage her not to talk to them.

The two friends she has made in the area D has told her to drop because they are "bad influences". The worst thing one has done was medical Marijuana that was prescribed to them. Not sure how they are bad except they've encouraged her to get a job and be more independent

D decided to get a cat, which my sister has a known allergy to. She didn't want the cat, but D brought it home. It has absolutely zero training and has destroyed their home. It pees everywhere, including my nephew's bed. It hates absolutely everyone except D, even attacking my sister for sitting on the couch next to D. D refuses to get rid of the thing even though it has scratched my sister and nephew multiple times and my nephew is afraid of it

Of course, there's more, but those are all things I have witnessed. The last part is what prompted me to take pictures of the bed that was peed on, the scratches on the kid and my sister. My sister showed me texts of her begging D to get rid of the cat and to me it seemed he threatened her, so I took a picture of that.

I personally believe D is an abusive prick. Definitely financially and emotionally, but not physically unless you consider neglect or him keeping the cat. He has never once hit my nephew or my sister that I have seen, and she has never stated he has. My sister has talked about leaving but then goes back to him, and I know on the outside it seems clear to me what to do but I know there is a cycle of abuse. When she is ready to leave him, she knows she can come to me and our parents.

However, D found out I took the photos. He called me drunk and extremely irate, but he didn't explicitly threaten me. It was implied. He called me an asshole, which is what made me think of this. He told me to delete the photos and that upon me doing so, he will get couples therapy.

On one hand I know they need therapy. On the other, what's to prove he will do this after I do that? My sister is begging me to delete the photos because she believes if they have therapy things will improve.

To be specific: D wants to be there when I delete them and make sure they are gone and to me that just proves how bad of a person he is because he doesn't want any evidence of any wrongdoing. My sister has sent me multiple texts and I know she has been trying to make a way for things in case it does go south, but she is afraid the inlaws will attempt for custody because apparently the inlaws have a bit of money and know the judge in our area. I dont want these photos to be used against her either...

AITA for not deleting them?

What are these acronyms?

[bonefall]

For context with Floatshimmer she is an 11 moon old, with kits.

goddddddd I just looked at the allegiances, trying DESPERATELY not to get sidetracked so I finish Star before the winds of my mental disorder pick me up and plop me down on a totally different task than the one I'm trying to do,

BUT

Lord it's bad. It's BEE-AY-D BAD. They didn't just make Moonpaw's parentage terrible, almost every choice (besides the expected Night/Sun and Blaze/Light litters) is weird in some way

We've got some new Orphan Warriors in the form of Fluffpaw and Silkypaw in WindClan, and Sprucepaw and Redpaw in ShadowClan.

Floatshimmer was just born 2 books ago, and is a mother as soon as Changing Skies opens up.

Breezepelt's daughter, Appleshine, now has Rustlekit and Stretchkit, making him a grandfather (not the weirdest thing I guess, considering how many descendants Lionblaze has... but still feels odd.)

Rootspring's sister, Needleclaw, now unceremoniously has Starlingkit and Robinkit in spite of having zero insight to who her potential mate is. EDIT: It's Kitescratch. Her first cousin once removed, a character I can't remember her hanging out with. Wasn't Kite one of Root's bullies

BOTH Myrtlebloom and Bayshine, siblings, are having kittens at the exact same time, and the Erins are really bad at remembering first cousins. I'm having That's So Raven visions into the future of shiptease between Moonpaw and Oak/Sun/Hazel and I'm practically setting up the plot hijinks of the sitcom episode hurling myself into action to try and prevent it

SOME CURSORY THOUGHTS TO HOW I'M GONNA FIX IT;

Orphan Warriors are easy for me to fix, I'll just link them up to some existing families. I guess now's a good time to casually drop that BB!ASC is going to end with the canonical "exodus" of several RiverClan cats, so I'm probably going to have both Silky/Fluff and Spruce/Red be fathered by RiverClan migrants.

Floatshimmer is waaaay too young to be having kits, even by canon's standards, but in BB cats start to have kits around 3-ish. I'm not sure if teenage pregnancy is a thing I feel personally comfortable tackling at this point in time, so I might shuffle her, OR take her kits and "hold on" to them so they get born later. Unsure.

I think Peepaw Breezepelt might just feel odd to me because of BB stuff, since he has his first litter with Harestar and Heathertail after BB!OotS. I'll probably end up shuffling Rustle/Stretch to Heathertail's half-brother, Galerunner, but include a little line or something about Breezy-P and The Polycule starting to feel old.

Needlekits......... hm. I could be tempted for the vibe that Needle had kids on accident and Rootspring is stepping in as an uncle parental figure... but ALSO I like the idea a LOT of Rootspring adopting kids one day. I might make them become Root's adopted kids. EDIT: Kitescratch being FCOR is putting the canon pairing in range of Onestar's Exception, so Needleclaw's litter is now even MORE likely to change.

Light's litter with Blaze is expected, that can stay unchanged, though I am starting to consider how to fix the way her character arc was more of a character stumble.

What I'm planning with Sunbeam's litter I can't tell you yet. Not because I don't know what I'm doing with it, but because I love it a lot and I'm grinning just thinking about revealing it. But you can't have it yet. I gotta finish Star. You don't get to know until I finish Star :))))

[burningcheese-merchant]

I WILL NOW BE PRESENTING MY BURNINGCHEESE EVIDENCE TO THE COURT

It is Sunday. I have free time. There are people out there who still do not ship BurningCheese/GoldenSpice. This offends me. You all must now endure Maximum Annoyance in retaliation.

Exhibit A: The description of Burning Spice's throne decor ends with this line: "Now, after tasting the sweet joy of destruction and chaos, Burning Spice Cookie sits and meditates... waiting for the perfect moment to hunt down his prey."

This is most likely referring to Golden Cheese herself. She is constantly, directly called "prey" (and also "bird") by the Wild Spices throughout the story. Burning Spice himself calls his seeking of her "the bird hunt".

Smoked Cheese also remarks at one point that Burning Spice could probably go after them whenever he wishes; he's just toying with them, watching them go. Playing cat-and-mouse.

Two things can be drawn from all of this:

Burning Spice talks about Golden Cheese so often, and calls her "bird" and "prey" so often, that his forces have adopted these nicknames he's given her and now think of her as them themselves

Burning Spice has been sitting on his throne and watching/keeping track of her for literal hours, if not even longer than that. And he does that instead of just getting up and going after her immediately because he likes watching and chasing her. (ADDITIONAL NOTE: He yells "ALL THE WAITING I'VE ENDURED... FOR THIS?!" at her later on, further proving that he's spent for-fucking-ever just thinking about her and their meeting/fight. I will address this line again later.)

Exhibit B: As soon as Golden Cheese appears within his line of sight, he stops caring about anything else. Nutmeg Tiger speaks directly to him and he completely ignores her. He does not acknowledge Smoked Cheese in any way. He does not acknowledge the Spice Swarm in any way. The entire episode, the Wild Spices are combing every inch of their territory in search of her, claiming over and over again that if they bring her to Burning Spice, he will shower them with praise and glory. But when this finally happens, when they succeed in holding her in place and stalling for time for Burning Spice to arrive, no such thing happens. Burning Spice acknowledges nothing and no one except for her. It's as if time has stopped. Like the earth has ceased to rotate on its axis. All that exists in the universe is himself and Golden Cheese.

Exhibit C: First thing he says to her is "Finally... we meet." An expression of joy and relief that he finally gets to be face-to-face with her. Second thing is calling her the thief who stole the other half of his Soul Jam. THIRD THING IS A GODDAMN COMPLIMENT.

Of all the words of tongue and pen he could have chosen to give her. The cruel insults. The petty jabs. The cocky assertion of his impending victory over her. Even a single nod and commendation of his soldiers' hard work, even in passing. Nope. No, sir. All that time he spent waiting to meet her, all the time he had to think of something to say to her, and he chooses to say "hey, you did a sweet job of beating the shit out of my general, I fucking loved it" (and he honestly said it super weird. Go back and listen to the line. Listen closely to his tone. He sounds borderline flirtatious/seductive, I swear to God)

Exhibit D: Mr. Creepshot over here starts his gacha animation doing the yin-yang pose with Golden Cheese, and the way he opens his eyes and looks at her almost makes it look like he's either trying to peek up her collar at her chest, or trying to peek up her skirt:

Look at that twinkle in his eye. The predatory grin on his face. He is ZEROED IN on her. He looks like he wants to eat her for every meal of the day (and I don't just mean literally). Jail. Immediately.

Exhibit E: He does not stop smiling ONCE during their entire interaction, from the second he shows up to the end of their fight (and then he goes back to smiling like a maniac at her soon after anyway). He is grinning at her like he's the Joker and she's his Batman (and we all know how... attached to Batman Joker is lol). He looks like this - like she - is the only fun he's had in a long, long time. He is HAPPY to see her, even in this evil, deranged way.

Exhibit F: He looks at her like this:

No man that looks at a woman like this has holy intentions, I'm telling you. Wrath's not the only sin on his mind right now. Line directly below may or may not be related :)

Exhibit G: Some of his overworld dialogue seems to allude to Golden Cheese specifically.

"I do enjoy my prey to have a little fight in them!" - he says this exact line directly to her face in the story

"Why, I, too, once had things I held dear." - He's talking to you, the player. This is something he says when you tap on him in his little lobby. But it can be argued that he's talking to Golden Cheese, as well. He might be thinking of her, referencing her specifically when he says this, because... that's her. SHE had things she held dear. Things she loved, things she lost. Things she grieves still. He knows this. He reminds her of it. He might almost be trying to acknowledge a connection with/to her, beyond them sharing the Light of Change. He was like her once. He had people he loved and lost. (Watch his interaction w/ Nutmeg Tiger in your kingdom, it'll all but tell you this.) They have a lot more in common than just a power source. Maybe he knows this. Maybe he's trying to express that, to you and to her.

"Abundance? Hah! More stuff to break..." - 555-COME-ON-NOW

"Sorry to break it to you... but nothing is eternal!" - Again, he's talking to you/us, but he could just as easily be talking to/thinking of her when he says this. Golden Cheese always championed her kingdom and her wealth as eternal. She essentially doubles down on this notion through her keeping them all alive inside a digital fantasy world. Episode 18 is literally titled "Goddess of Eternal Gold". He could be making a jab at her here.

"Cookies clinging to their little possessions... Pathetic!" and "In the end, everything becomes dust." - Double whammy. Him talking/thinking about her here can be further supported by what he says to her before he rips her wings off: "Ruler of a fallen kingdom. The Tide of Change will swallow you whole. You will crumble and become dust, like all those trinkets you treasured so." Again, he already knows her whole life story. He knows what happened to her. To her people. To everything and everyone she ever loved. He knows she loves trinkets. He knows she revels in opulence. He already knows her well enough to know what to say to her and how, to drive the knife in deepest. He calls her dust. He reminds her of all of her precious trinkets that she loved so damn much. She clings to her little possessions. She will become dust. Like her kingdom already did. Like everything one day will.

Exhibit H: When he wins their fight and he's holding her over the cliff, he yells "ALL THE WAITING I'VE ENDURED... FOR THIS?!" (we're back to this line, just like I said!) Before you bring up him wanting the Soul Jam back (which he does, I do not deny this), consider this: he makes no move whatsoever to take it back, even when he's got her in his grasp and the Soul Jam is inches from his face. He's got her beat, pinned, but he leaves it at that. He doesn't even mention the Soul Jam at all, not even once. All he does is yell and throw a huge tantrum about how their battle didn't go the way he wanted it to. He just go on and on about how it can't end like this. His bird hunt can't end like this. Where's the thrill? He honestly seems to care less about the Soul Jam and more about her. It's not the "the Soul Jam hunt", it's "the BIRD hunt". He wants his power back, of course. But that's not all he wants. He wants her. He's after her.

Additional point, that may or may not be enough to count as Exhibit I: In the beginning, Saffron Buffalo tells Golden Cheese that Burning Spice chose her. After she and Smoked Cheese kick his ass, he says now he understands WHY Burning Spice chose her, and he was wrong to doubt her and her strength.

It can be inferred from this, from Burning Spice's reaction to her, from his reaction to their fight, from his reaction to her swift loss, that Burning Spice thinks highly of her and her capabilities, at least in his own evil, violent way. Enough for it to be noticeable even to his subordinates. Enough that he would not bend the knee if and when questioned. Enough that he's beyond disappointed when their fight ends the way it does. He wanted more from her. He expected more from her. He had high hopes for her, right from the jump. And she let him down. Broke his dark heart.

Burning Spice has had Golden Cheese on his mind for God and the Witches know how long. He thought well enough of her to choose her. To proudly state that she meets his standards. He waited for her, again for who really knows how long. He sat and meditated on her, on his hunt for her, on their fated meeting and battle. He was beyond pleased when she once again proved her might to him by taking out his general (even better, he might have gotten to see it happen as he was approaching the scene). He all but purrs his words of contentment at her prowess at her (go back and listen to him when he says that line. Pay close attention to the tone and cadence of his voice. He sounds... a certain way when he's talking to her. He really does, I mean it). He's entirely too pleased to see her. He comes to life when they battle. He looks like this is the best day of his whole damn life so far. He's angry and bitter when she throws it all away to save an insignificant child. He's angry and bitter she's taken everything he's done, all the time and effort he's spent, for granted. He's bitter enough to take pot shots at her. To sprinkle some salt in her wounds, where he knows it'll hurt most. He KNOWS her. He WAITED for her. He expected so much of her. Of course he wants the Soul Jam back. But he's shown that he wants Golden Cheese herself just as much.

In conclusion:

[harveybwabbit92]

Speedy ultra facts (Revised, with a few more facts):

4 out of the original 6 ultra brothers are actually related to each other.

Taro and Ace are brothers, Seven is their cousin.

Jack is married to one of Mother of Ultra's sisters making him Seven, Taro and Ace's uncle.

Seven has a sister and brother.

Seven was raised by his sister after his mother died.

Seven, Jack and Taro have children.

Seven is Zero's father.

Taro is Taiga's father

And Jack has an unnamed son.

(And I guess Ace counts too? since he's Ultraman Z's godfather.)

Taro and Ace are the sons of Father and Mother of Ultra.

Ace is adopted.

Mother and Father's real names are Ken and Marie.

Ultraman is a university professor.

Leo and Astra are twins and princes.

Zoffy is apparently the grandson of ultraman King.

Zoffy smokes (in the manga he does anyways)

An Ultra-baby appears in it's capsule for a few seconds at the end of Mega Monster Battle: Ultra Galaxy Legends in the crowd of ultras who have been unfrozen.

The baby parents are a red(or silver) father and a blue mother.

Jack is one of the few original ultra brother's who stays in regular contact with his human host.

Ultraman Mebius's favorite food is curry.

Zero has a childhood friend named Voice who is a musician.

Ultra's mouths can open and close considering they also need to eat and drink.

Father of Ultra is terrified of angering his wife.

Taro and Ace used to have a pet dog.

Apparently there are cats and dogs in the Land of Light, though they look very different from their Earth counterparts. (Cos Aliens)[though in the comics the pup looks like a normal dog, but in the show it looks like white puffball wit' spider legs.]

Mother of Ultra has at least two sisters, one of whom married jack and the other is Seven's mother.

80 is adopted (at least in the manga adaption he is.)

80's adoptive father's name is Ultraman Red and he's Father's best friend.

Color timers were surgically grafted onto an ultra's chest in early childhood. (Taro has his as a young child in Ultraman Story and Ultraman boy has one...but then there's Geed whose timer really was grafted onto him after birth...Ah, I'm not going down this rabbit hole.)

{(Okay, I went and reviewed the wiki and some other sources on this the Color timer thing has been sort of retconned, They changed the age for Color timers to teen or adult Ultras who have the choice if they want to have a color timer or not (there are lot civvy ultras who don't have a color timer), and that it's mainly for Ultras whose jobs require them to travel off planet or for Ultras who are active warriors in the IGDF. but for the earlier installments (like the original 60s lore) it was at birth.)}

The reason Ultraseven doesn't have a color timer is cos he wasn't meant to be a fighter. His original mission was to scout out and draw a map of the milky way galaxy.

The creator of Pokemon was inspired by Ultraseven, in fact the reason it's called Pokemon is because the name Capsule monsters was already copyrighted by Tsuburaya.

Most Ultras are born through gestation capsules.(However according some of the novels *they might be outdated and thus not considered canon anymore* There are a few that still make babies and give birth the ol'fashion way.)

Fuma, Gai and Jugglus are from the same planet O-50.

The inhabitants on O-50 Aren't born ultras their original forms, As much as it sucks are human-like in appearance, but they do have super abilities to sort of make up for it. The only true way to become an Ultra on O-50 is by being chosen by the Light ring or The voice of light to become one.

The Light Ring/Voice of light is this big blue halo that floats over the planet O-50 that sometimes gives people super powers... ([there's not a lot info on O-50 other then the few snippets from the R/B novel, Orb saga and Fuma's voice drama, so work with me here])

O-50's trial to become an Ultra requires one or more people who must climb to the very top of the planets highest and deadliest mountain: Crusader's peak. Now, they can do this completely on their own or be summoned personally by the Light ring. (According to Fuma a lot of people fail the trial because they either kill each other or die on the climb up.) Anyway when they reach the peak the Ring will pass judgement if they're worthy or not, if they're found worthy then it grants them the power they need to turn into an ultra....If not then, it'll electro yeet them off the mountain like it did with Jugglus.

Though not inhabitants of O-50 themselves, the original R/B/G siblings crashed landed there and got the power to transform into their ultra and Kaiju forms, from the Light ring while to fighting off a monster they'd accidentally woke up while fighting off a gang that had chased them off their home planet.

According to Fuma, Grigio is considered an idol on O-50.

Now on to U-40 Where the inhabitants are called Ultra-people who are all born human in appearance, they're just ultras but human size.

the ancient inhabitants of U-40 through unknown means created the Ultra mind. (It's a core of light that works similarly to the plasma spark.) which helped them achieve a higher state of spiritual evolution that transformed them into ultras.

Unlike their M-78 counter parts the U-40 ultras can't naturally grow into giants; except for this small group of eight warriors who have achieved the ability to grow giant, though much like the creation of the Ultra mind this isn't fully explained on how or why this can happened. (though in Titas's backstory it hints at that it might be connected to resolve and finding balance within one's self.).

Despite that the few inhabitants of U-40 that can turn giant prefer to stay small or in their human forms rather then their giant forms.

Unlike the land of light U-40 still has it's sun and thus has day and night cycles, though one of it's two moons was destroyed by the Heller Army (the bad guys of The⭐Ultraman anime.).

[.....Though, I think I heard somewhere that the Land o light Ultras use technology that's similar to switchable film windows or something to mimic a night-cycle (Well, indoors they do anyways.) but I could be misremembering.]

Titas is a dark giant.

Titas was born in the dark nebula to two soldiers in the Heller Army but his parents didn't want him to follow in their footsteps, so they sent him as an infant to U-40 where he could grow up safely and choose his own path.

Ultraman X possibly dated an alien space cat monster Mu who looks like a cross between a Beholder from DnD and a cat, she also had memory erasing farts.

X doesn't remember dating Mu...

Ultraman thought humans were too primitive to have develop the ability to fly, He was proven wrong moments later by getting hit in the face by a jet being flown by his host Shin Hayata.

Ultras aren't completely made of energy, they actually have skeletons and organs that are sort similar to a human's but also having a few extras that are very alien.

Ultras stop aging at around 10000 years and 1 ultra year is equivalent to 300 human years.

[fuzzballsheltiepants]

A (very) incomplete list of things I loved in TSC: (obviously, spoilers)

Jean having no sense of time at the beginning. he has literally zero idea how much time has passed and has no frame of reference. it feels like weeks; we only know because we read the original series

the shift once again, this time from Jean's POV, from Nathaniel to Neil! it being a mark of respect

seeing how Neil really relayed the deal with Ichirou to Kevin and Jean (that Neil totally glossed over in TKM)

all of Jean's internal and spoken insults for everyone around him but especially all the Foxes

Jean's complete and utter disdain for short people and how many there are, just, everywhere. why are short people allowed? they should be illegal

Andrew's single word in the entire book being, "Leaving." just classic

the whole scene where Jean watches the final game? where he is so invested in how the Foxes are doing that when they win he shoves the tv?

Jean mentally adding Andrew into the Perfect Court because they need a goalkeeper, deciding that if Kevin and Riko die it would be ok because Jean, Andrew, and Neil were enough to rebuild around

Jeremy standing at baggage claim playing with a yo-yo until he gets it tangled in his headphones

Cat teaching Jean to cook

Jean being adorably horny and constantly swayed by beautiful people

Cat thinking Renee is hot

Jean just...not understanding how people function if their every move is not controlled at first? and then starting to come around?

Jean buying clothes! picking out things for himself!

Jeremy buying people in need gift cards because he can

Barkbark von Barkenstein being the silent unwitting center of a tiny war between Jean and Jeremy

Rhemann starting to realize what Jean/the Ravens have been going through at the hands of their coaches and needing to take a minute or fifty to get over it

Jean finding himself adopted into a queer family and just rolling with it

Jeremy and his complete and utter avoidance of every possible personal problem. nothing to see here, folks

Jean's glee when the Trojans first curse, being absolutely certain that this is revealing some deep well of depravity

the Trojans' techniques for staying sportsmanlike on the court (while really aggravating the fuck out of their opponents)

the fact that Neil and Jean together are basically a buddy comedy (which I NEED MORE OF)

Neil from an outside perspective as a weird little man who can negotiate without flinching with dangerous people, navigate an unfamiliar city after briefly studying printed off Mapquest instructions, coolly order a hit in the middle of a restaurant, and develop a convincing lie at the drop of a hat

Neil's tactless but relentless kindness?

"A cool evening breeze. Rainbows. Open roads. Friends."

[goodolddumbbanana]

[GOODGUY NEXUS AU]

In the world when everything is just slightly opposite. Sun and Moon are assholes. Nexus is just New Moon turned good after the tragic accident (Ruin happens) making Solar has to go to get milk.

It's just a normal day at daycare. You know, kids to babysit, enemies to torment. Sun sat on the couch, calculating how much detergent he would need to clean up the dirt and oil that bastard Eclipse left behind.

Nexus shows up with the angel costume maybe they make for the Halloween with little wings and sparkling.

Sun: Nexus , What are you wearing?

New Moon: Sun, I decide to become OME now.

Sun: Ome?

Nexus: It's the opposite of emo and cringe. I have adopted a life of joy and positivity.

Sun takes a deep breath. He throws his cat out of the window and looks at Nexus very seriously. He stutters.

Sun: What?! Just why? Nexus. There is always something happening with you, isn't it?

Nexus: I have elevated my consciousness and hope to be a source of life in this world.

Sun: Where did I go wrong? Did I not give you enough attention? Have back then, I compared you with Old Moon too much?

Nexus: No Sun. You never did that. In fact, You have and always been a wonderful brother. I hold on zero resentment towards you. I love you.

Sun looks as much hurt as he surprised: Hold no resentment?! Stop this young man! I didn't raise you like that!!

Nexus looks innocent as ever, his red eyes sparkling with stars: I know it might be different to difficult to understand but I feel a deep sense of purpose to make the world a better place.

Sun pressed his forehead, he tried to be gentle as ever.

Look brother, I remember when I was your age, I used to dress in a pretty princess dress and go around asking people to change to be a better person. You are just going through a little phase right now.

Nexus is just not freaking listen: I'm enlightened and I'm here to spread the message of love and positivity to the whole world.

Sun (*trying to fix the damage he has no idea how it happened in the first place*): I will ask Puppet to yeet your butt out of space. You need a couple of negative influences in your life to get a taste of the real world. So you can be back and be a dick like the rest of us.

Nexus: This is a misstep for which I already forgive you.

Sun: Now march upstairs and put something normal!!

...

Ah great. My brother just ascended to a higher state of consciousness and became God in order to save these humanity. Where the hell did I go wrong?

[mamaclownhunter]

You have to understand this fic series added YEARS to my life @jezebel_rising (it is spicy M)

I been consuming drunk fics recently and I think I reached my personal new joy and headcanon that SQQ is an angry punchy but overly affectionate to his people drunk. Tsundere to the max.

There are like 2 fics that blessed me with punchy violent drunk SQQ and two that gave me him being a goober with SQH.

Give me both with zero filters. I want violent SQQ and his “bro we shouldn’t/bro bro we GOTTA” SQH toggles on enabler and responsible drunk for me.

But also learned and adopted that SQH is the type of drunk that will rebuild a car blasted. He makes the wildest contraptions and goes through strange tinker builder plans black out drunk. He is competent and efficient and wakes up hungry over wondering when the fuck he learned quantum physics. Like he is a “I got this”

I want them to be the others enablers. I want SQH to be ride or die if cucumber bro starts a bar fight he is there at his side sighing drunk and lazy but kicking ass. (Thank you Jezebel)

I want SQH to stare at a wall and go “I wanna invent a Xianxia version of a plane” and SQQ to go “that is fucking dumb let’s do it” (thaaank you Jezebel)

I want them to be each other’s friend. I want them to kinda sit there hung over… and kinda just weirdly happy they have a friend that gets them in this life. That they have a friend who is the bane of their existence but can have fun drunk shenanigans neither really got to have in their first life.

Mobei and Binghe not knowing what to do with them. They both are clingy drunks but one is spitting curses and aggressively snuggling like a cat high on catnip- and the other is singing praises and compliments while trying to bury himself in his husband’s robes.

But THIS FIC SERIES really had me rolling bc like- 2 twenty first century guys who are use to shorts and tee shirts forgetting after the third drink that- it is not 100% proper. They are aware enough to be these future boys behind closed doors- but to them hitting each other with paint in shorts is just guys being guys. To their royal husbands and everyone else in this ancient world????

Also SQQ in gym shorts and a tee shirt is my new favorite thing. This is the cutest I have drawn SQH- I had fun