#I feel like I’m grasping at straws
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I am still so incredibly confused by the lore adventure we went on today.
Code Flippa lead bbh, Max, and Aypierre back into the maze to the one blocked off hallway to find it transformed with black concrete that lead to a cucurucho puzzle, Dapper’s hat, and Bbh’s plane ticket.
Parts of it looked Federation built while others certainly were not. Could this have been created/sponsored by the dark cucurucho?
Ok ok. We discovered the maze when an unknown entity delivered the coords to Tubbo, Slime, and Roier via black concrete. The maze is some kind of abandoned federation facility. It seems that light cucurucho can’t go in meanwhile dark cucurucho is living down there somehow. Then the “space ship” appears and all the eggs start leaving messages with black concrete as if their dimension was leaving traces on this world through the contact. Then code Flippa leads the gang into the maze to find it also corrupted. The message they received about protocol AB was glitchy and the books they found were distinctly not the cururuchos we are familiar with. The cucurucho puzzle’s answer was a cheerleader pin up of cucurucho that lead to black, red, and white dice, Bad’s plane ticket and Dapper’s top hat.
Ok. Theory time, I’m gonna grasp at straws and try to piece things together XD
The structure that appeared is a conduit between the dimensions. It allows the other world to affect this one easier. Where ever this world is is the origins of the code entities. Dark cucurucho is connected to this other world somehow kr has some influence there. We know the codes original goal was to make everyone leave the island. What if this other dimension is a prison/garbage disposal of the federation’s failed experiments?
Luzu’s computer was a link in the beginning that allowed first contact to be made and the first code to cross over. Luzu’s computer was eventually destroyed (by the federation?) and the code lost its form/began to decay (i don’t remember the timeline here). The federation claimed to have some kind of power over the codes and promised they wouldn’t be a problem during the election cycle which makes sense if they are failed experiments. They might have partial control, just enough to neuter them temporarily, as it took a while before the codes attacked again - and when they did they took a new approach.
The codes took the form of the eggs and attacked the presidential candidates. If they want to make the islanders leave/resist the federation so they don’t wind up as more failed experiments then it makes sense the codes would try to kill the candidates. They would want to stop the election from happening because that means the islanders will be even more trapped/less likely to leave.
After the election they turned their focus entirely into Etoiles and getting the code sword and shield. Maybe there is something within this dimension that is incredibly powerful - an old experiment that the federation created this dimension to imprison - that is trying to get out. While in the dimension, nothing can die as this dimension is entirely in code. That’s why the eggs are safe there, why they haven’t needed any tasks done, why their life cycle has paused - because they aren’t corporeal, they’ve been reduced to code and are thus untouchable. The binary entities have been in this dimension for so long they no longer remember what they used to look like.
However, have u noticed that once the codes got one sword, they’ve been able to duplicate them infinitely? Maybe that’s why they wanted the shield back from Etoiles. Within this other world, the codes can create more of those items. Maybe they were using Etoiles to train themselves so that when this powerful experiment breaks free they’ll be able to destroy it? Maybe they were training Etoiles so he’d be able to destroy it? Maybe they are duplicating the op sword and shield so the islanders will be able to kill it? Idk
I got a little side tracked so let’s get back to the maze. The codes have a vested interest in the players Lear ing about this entity if it’s going to break free. Whoever is on the other side brought Tubbo and crew to the maze (was it dark cucurucho?) Within the maze they discovered the transmission confirming that the federation knows why the eggs ran away. Dark cucurucho showed them the wheel and the egg items but we still have no clue what that was. Perhaps this is dark cucurucho’s job, to keep the federation’s mistakes forgotten and it is preparing the players for when the fed’s mistake breaks free via its influence in this other dimension.
Then today we have code Flippa bring us to a part of the maze I think was built/hijacked directly by dark cucurucho. It was a distinctly federation structure that had been renovated with darker colors and black concrete and the books were a scary kind of playful. The cururucho maze makes sense because the dark cucurucho is mocking light cucurucho. Maybe this dark cucurucho is tired of cleaning up after the federation or despises the other cucuruchos because it’s forced to live in the sewers cleaning up their shit.
It knows bbh, what he’s capable of, so it brought him here via code assistance to show him a piece of his past he doesn’t remember. It wants to tear down the federation just like the islanders so it is spreading all the federations dirty laundry for the islanders to see. First confirmation that the federation knows why the eggs left and now bbh’s past visit to the island he doesn’t remember. Maybe dark cucurucho is even aiding in bringing the fed’s monster back so it can destroy the fed itself.
I have no clue I feel like I’m still as confused as when I started writing this XD tell me ur thoughts and theories cuz I’m at a loss lol
#qsmp#crimson speaks#I feel like I’m grasping at straws#but this other dimension being a prison the fed created for a failed experiment they can’t control would be dope#and dark cucurucho being a sort of janitor of the Fed’s mistakes could also make sense#I definately 100% think dark curucuho is responsible for the adventure today#it wanted bbh to learn about his past visit#and has some influence over the codes/code flippa#idk idk idk#brain is mush#I order pizza now
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How I’m gonna be numb but on the verge of breaking down crying at the same time? Like how the fuck does that work?
#I’m truly so fucking like empty?? idk but also my heart hurts? idk I’m not doing good RN lol#like the way at my big age….I’ve never known love or care or anything is truly pathetic#and how am I supposed to long for something or imagine something or manifest something THAT IVE NEVER FUCKING HAD OR FELT#I feel like I’m grasping at straws#like it makes me feel actually insane#like I’ve lost my marbles#because it just simply doesn’t feel attainable or possible or realistic at all#because I have ZERO POINT OF REFRENCE#anyway…..#maybe one day I’ll know but I really don’t think so 😭💀#okay I’m done
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Am I the only one that rolled my eyes and sighed in the theater during the Beetlejuice sequel when Lydia said the thing about the 600-year-old age gap between her and Beetlejuice? There were so many other things she could have brought up, like him being gross, or crazy, or… I dunno, dead? That’s the one she came up with? It felt so unnecessary.
#beetlejuice beetlejuice#beetlejuice#lydia deetz#beetlebabes#like I’m sorry girl what#Lydia you’re probably older than he was when he died what are you talking about#and I feel like there’s not really aging in the afterlife to begin with#like i kind of view Beetlejuice as less 600-years-old and more just an immortal ghost man#with goofy gorey cartoonish superpowers#stuck at the age he was at when he croaked kind of like Jeremy/Richard/all the other ghosts#…then again maybe this means she would totally be okay with a gross crazy dead guy and she had to grasp for straws lmao#there’s hope yet 😤
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still unwell thinking about the mumbo coal miner idea
cause like if we go on the assumption jimmys canary curse was broken in secret life and thus doesn’t exist in wild life (and so theres no canary to warn the miner)
long term acute exposure to certain gasses in the mines can cause irritability and unease, on top of this the gasses are usually highly flammable
and like geez, i wonder who’s been weirdly paranoid and died to an explosion this season 🤔
#mcyt#life series#trafficblr#mumbo jumbo#his mc skin is also weirdly fitting for this too tbh#gasses can cause pale skin and eye irritation#and like his skin is horribly pale with gaunt eyes#I don’t usually subscribe to the like 50 million and 1 different hcs and curses people attribute to the life series tbh#a lot of the time it feel like desperately grasping at straws (cause let’s face it this is all coincidental friend improv)#but I figure some people may get a kick out of me reading to much into this#tbf paranoia is p uncommon for most coal mine gasses#it’s usually more just general uneasiness/malaise confusion or delirium but it can happen#this is also ignoring all the other gas poisioning symptoms like the respiratory and cardiac issues#and the death (that’s a big one to ignore) but that doenst fit the narrative I’m trying to push so I’m ignoring it :) /j
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I’m having a lot of feelings about it tonight so I just have to say as a Mexican person, it means so goddamn much to me that a Mexican man was cast to play as Luffy in the live action One Piece
And not only that but Taz Skylar being Spanish and playing my favorite character Sanji feels like the biggest treat in the world to me and there’s so many videos of Taz and Iñaki speaking in Spanish to each other and it feels so natural and wonderful and damn do I just love being Hispanic
Los amos a todos!!
#I’m terrible awful at articulating my feelings but I just feel like I’ve been grasping at straws for Latino rep my whole life and now!!#look!! two beloved characters that mean so goddamn much to me are speaking in Spanish and being themselves and it feels amazing!!#and also! happy Hispanic heritage month!!#one piece live action#one piece#opla#monkey d. luffy#vinsmoke sanji#taz skylar#iñaki godoy#mine
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Not to be dramatic but since hiori is blasian in canon I need black x readers asap🗣️ like we are DEF not getting any cultural background on this kid (because they just slid it in there like we weren’t gonna recognize in the first place)not that we have any background on any of these children’s parents but I think he should explain how he feels being mixed in Japan because it’s just really funny having these two in the exact same anime, and they are both black 
This is ABSOLUTELY hilarious 😭
Edit: so I’ve noticed a pattern of EVERY character looking like their mother and barely sharing any resemblance to their fathers so ig he gets a pass for being pale BUT there’s even more melaninated characters so let’s give him some sun too!!🥺
Respectfully; come the fuck on
#blue lock#hiori yo#blue lock hiori#bllk hiori#hiori x reader#blue lock x reader#like I’m most likely gonna do some thing myself#but like the fact that I found out from Twitter#I am once again asking if it is a nod to like being white passing#like is he not supposed to look black because of that#he don’t look like his parents where did his dad come from? Did he immigrate to Japan? Is he Afro American ? Is he Nigerian?#like they’re doing so good on representation so far please.#IT HAS TO BE ON PURPOSE#BC LEO OR WHAYEVER HIS NAME IS IS THERE AND SHIDOU AND TYE OTHER BLACK GUY#I’m literally choosing to believe that it’s on purpose#I am reaching for Atoms I’m not grasping at straws!!#he says he feels like he doesn’t belong so does he mean displaced from two cultures or just one?#what about his extended family is he allowed to talk to them since they’re so suffocating?#I feel like this is a very real thing black kids relate to you can’t just give me him and not tell me shit about him.#if I catch up in the manga and I don’t get any more details I’m going to start chewing lava#Filling in the blanks on his backstory on God#does he just know English and Japanese?#He has a very specific dialect of speaking so is it from knowing a different type of language??#aave mixed in???#French is a very prevalent language in Africa. Does he know a little French?#CREOLE??#like please sad backstory aside who the fuck is he!!#does he get to interact with any of the other black characters??#HIM SHIDOU AND LOKI CAN HE BESTIES LIKE COME ON!!#im in so much pain I’m reading ahead of where I am
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once again thinking about my ideal 3rd drb match up and how it’d stack up with plot beats and so far all i got is
🔴💥⚪️: true hypnosis mic opponents, maybe jakurai ends up on a side for further development to save yotsutsuji and that’s against ichiro’s current goal
🔵💥🟠: haven’t quite figured out why, but rei vs samatoki is the angle i’m thinking about
🟡💥🟣: all plot stakes division vs no stakes division lol idk really but i’m leaning towards a bonds angle or if hypmic wants to be real freaky, the side effects angle 🤔
#this is vee speaking#i still think a new format could happen but idk lol there’s so many unknowns rn#like what’s next specifically lmao#i personally feel it would be a waste not to have jakurai working to finalise development for this potential other true hypnosis mic lol#like they teased him joining chuuoku but then didn’t commit?????? huh??????#what about his struggle with causing more harm vs saving that one?????? like come on now??#so here’s me trying to put him back on that track lol#why not sasara vs samatoki you might ask lol and my answer is that’s the poster fight but the real fight is between rei and samatoki lol#samatoki was weirdly interested in rei watching bb vs dh and there’s a panel in showdown battle where samatoki looks……#he’s very hard to read actually while listening to ichiro#samatoki and rei are paralleling in the block party as individuals moved by ichiro’s ideals#so while i’m not sure if ichiro would be the reason to fight (🎋hahahaha🎋) i think there’s potential for strife#*sighs at bat* why doesn’t kr want to do anything with y’all lmao#if they went the side effects angle it’d be cool to have ramuda the guy whose clones die using the true hypnosis mic#vs kuukou who might be suffering from side effects (and against the guy that caused them tho he’s forgiven ramuda lol)#jyushi’s hypnosis ability to ‘recover’ is genuinely interesting because what is he recovering???? and why haven’t we seen it yet?????#maybe they’re lying in wait lol (delusional)#bonds angle is me grasping at straws lol but here’s how i can get my ideal match ups—
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genealogy is suuuuuch a boring and confusing and stressful hobby until all of a sudden u find something that makes soooooo much sense and all the dumb weird pieces start fitting together and u feel like ur meeting urself for the very first time!
#apparently i have melungeon ancestry!#and my family is one of the few melungeon families to be mostly native-white#specifically cherokee and catawba!#and probably a few other tribes too#which comes both from a paper trail and dna not just oral tradition#so i’m not Regular White i’m Spicy White#but obviously like w most melungeon families we’ve been so watered down i am White im not claiming anything#anyways i found the melungeon background from one line but then as i was looking more into it sooo many branches of my family tree-#trace back to the melungeons#and it all makes soo much sense now#the histories i was reading abt my family are soooo interesting too#i’m so excited to learn more abt my heritage!#anyways i feel like i was really grasping at straws abt my family until now#it’s alllll coming together….#kit talks#melungeon#appalachia#geneology
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Something that makes me happy #34:
Movie theatre popcorn
#something that makes me happy#it hits different y’all and if you disagree yer lyin like a rug#feels like I’m grasping at straws today trying to find things that make me happy#but it’s probably because I’m having a really awful time with my mental health right now#and the whole reason I started doing this was to be mindful and to exercise seeing positives even when I’m overwhelmed with negatives#mental health#positive thoughts#positive habits#positive thinking#mine#productive thoughts#mindfulness#movie theater#movies#scary movies#date movie#movie night#movie theater popcorn#popcorn#snacks#munchies#cinema#cinemark#amc theaters
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I wonder, is Star Rail’s universe based on Neoplatonism and the reason Nous won’t turn his gaze on Ratio because he’s a Stoic? and yes, I know later Neoplatonism incorporates Stoicism, but Ratio seems to be a pure Stoic so there’s gonna be a disconnect
#I’m probably grasping at straws but — oh well#I feel like Aventurine would be an Epicurean#he can be a hedonist. as a treat#Ryn plays Star Rail#Dr Veritas Ratio#shh Kat no one wants to hear you ramble about philosophy and how it relates to media#mad at myself because I took a course on Greek philosophy and I got rid of the textbook#this was like 10 years ago but still
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My brain isn’t functioning properly rn so this probably makes *zero* sense but I just need to type this out I feel like im going insane
I’m aware this post is just me incoherently rambling about Baylan, Shin and Ragnar but it’s in my head and I need it out of there so that I can sleep, it is currently 1am
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Okay we all know Baylan and Shin are named after the wolves in Norse mythology that chase the sun and moon, Sköll and Hati, thats an established fact in the fandom. But let’s dive a little deeper into the legend
According to everything that I’ve read, Sköll and Hati chase the chariots of the sun and moon across the sky, and when they eventually catch the celestial bodies, that will trigger the Ragnarök, the end of times.
What’s getting me here is the name of the apocalypse that the wolves will start when they catch the sun and moon. The Ragnarök.
…Ragnar.
There’s a character named Ragnar in The Mandalorian. Ragnar Vizsla, Paz Vizsla’s adopted son, introduced in season three
I- as far as I can tell, everything Filoni does with characters means something. Every naming choice, line of dialogue, means something. But what does this mean- if anything
If I remember correctly too, Ahsoka takes place at the same time Mandalorian S3 is happening, so im sitting here thinking about the two characters named after the wolves that start the Ragnarök and the child with a name two letters away from being Ragnarök, all being introduced within the exact same time period
All three characters clearly have bigger roles to play in future seasons of their respective shows and the upcoming Mandoverse movie, but are those roles gonna be. Connected??
This is sending me down a spiral of incoherent Star Wars thoughts and I’m subjecting everyone else to it cause like- has anyone else thought of this, does this even make sense
I have so many more thoughts about this but I’m gonna shush and not say any more of them, not rn at least. Future post.
#I feel like im grasping at straws but like#This has gotta mean something???#I’m not going insane right????#I’ve headcanoned Force-sensitive Ragnar for a while but like damn is it actually…plausible#I need to go to bed#send help#Star wars#Baylan Skoll#Shin Hati#Ragnar Vizsla#the mandalorian#ahsoka series#Yardi rambles about Star Wars
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lmao
#saw someone saying people give JL the characteristics of LJY in order to ship zhuiling and#??????#that doesn’t make any sense to me because I’ve never read any zhuiling fics where either of them are OOC or switched characteristics#because you really don’t need to in order for zhuiling to work???#my dude#JL and LSZ are canonically close friends /because/ of how well their personalities get along with each other#like it’s literally canon that JL ends up being close to LSZ because of LSZ being so patient and supportive with him#idk what else to tell you#except sorry you hate a fictional ship so much that you gotta fabricate reasons to dislike it??#what I usually do if I don’t like a certain thing in a fandom#is ignore it and go on with my life bc it’s not that serious#but go off I guess lmfAO#anyway#delete later#also reminder that I’m not going to argue with you over this so don’t bother#apple babble 🍎#since the headcanon of them being related has been debunked over and over#i feel like people just grasp at straws to shit on zhuiling specifically and it’s so wild like#how do you never get tired of being so crusty 💀
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#Spotify#these lyrics just hit in a way I wish they wouldn’t ://#I feel like I’m grasping at straws now
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GHAAAAAAAAHHHHHH
#not to throw up in the tags of my own posts but miserable rn#new cat who is locked in our room until he gets along with the others clawed up my arm as i was falling asleep#like used it to jump on the bed#and i know he’s just a little guy and all but i was half asleep and it hurt and i screamed and it was like the last straw mentally#i’ve been grasping at straws recently and i hate how it all crumbles down like this so often#sobbing over nothing! on christmas eve too! literally just can’t stop all my stress has bubbled over#i also still have a lot of gifts to make and i’m really embarrassed about that.#idk how time fucked me up this bad this month but i feel like the worst excuse for a person now more than ever#need someone to coddle me and take care of me so bad#like without me asking for something. just out of the kindness of their heart and love for me#have not mentioned yet that i am sick and ill#fever style in my bed crying while trying to get this asshole cat off my nightstand#he says hm i’m gonna go on every surface and be annoying about it#maybe i’m just mad at him bc my favorite cat can’t be in my room and i miss laying and cuddling with him every day#d8 is not nearly enough for the headspace i’m in
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why are my friends so silly
#funny#meme#hahaha#hehe :3#humor#im hiding nothing but bodies fiend#lmao#*drops random screenshots and leaves*#Guys I’m trying to be funny but I don’t know how#At this point I feel like a robot desperately grasping at straws to seem as human as possible#Does anyone even check the tags?#oh who am i kidding#its tumbler ofcourse they do
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(part of the ‘Wife at First Sight Series’)
For the first time in a long time, Simon feels as if he’s walking on eggshells
He’s 6’4”, easily over 200 pounds of bulking muscle, strikes fear into the heart of each and every enemy he comes across (should they live to tell the tale that is), and yet he feels as though he’s tiptoeing, practically dancing around the issue he refuses to address
Yet you make him feel this way
It’s been months now, of this dance you still haven’t realized you’re apart of, shining on centre stage under the constant spotlight of Simon Riley’s attention, rather than one of the background performers as you seem to believe
He feels as though he’s done everything he can to get the point across to you, other than literally getting down on one knee and asking you those four special words he can’t seem to get himself to speak out loud
As easy as it is to pretend you two truly are husband and wife ‘til death do you part, he’s instead having to watch you leave base in exchange for your lonely flat each night, reminded of the fact that he’s not ballsy enough to just come out and say it to you
You make the Lieutenant nervous for fucks sake, something he hasn’t truly felt in so long he’s grasping for straws, searching for a life raft in these uncharted waters to help him stay afloat
That’s part of why he’s so confused when Gaz finally joins him and Soap in the gun range, landing a friendly smack across the taller man’s broad shoulders, saying something about how he’s ‘really happy for you LT, finally properly asked her, aye?’
“What are you goin’ on about?” Ghost practically grunts out, readjusting the weapon against his shoulder as he glances through the scope of his gun, only partly interested in what the Sergeants answer is, that is until he hears him mention your name
“Just saw her at her desk, talkin’ about how she has a wedding this weekend-” Gaz has barely finished his sentence before Ghost is whipping his skull clad head around, shoving his weapon into Soap’s arms, and beelining out of the armoury towards you, leaving a pair of chuckling Sergeants behind him
They’ve never seen their Lieutenant so whipped before. And the fact that you don’t even know you have this beast of a man wrapped around your dainty little finger makes it all the more entertaining for them
They totally haven’t taken bets on how long it takes for him to break and finally confess his feelings, and Price definitely didn’t put money down on it either
Ghost may as well float into the room on a cloud he’s feeling so overjoyed at the idea of finding you sat at your desk all pretty, chit chatting away with colleagues about the wedding you’ve finally realized he intends to give you, taking all the pressure off of him
Instead, he rounds the corner and overhears the last tidbits of your conversation, pretending as though his stomach doesn’t drop out of him and onto the floor when he realizes you’re telling your desk mate about your sisters wedding this weekend
He should’ve know better, it wouldn’t be that easy
“-not that I’m embarrassed to go without someone. That I don’t care so much about.” He hears you explain, failing to have noticed him behind you quite yet. “God knows it’s been ages since I’ve gone on an actual date anyways. But this is the first time I’m a bridesmaid, and my sister keeps saying I’m apparently the only bridesmaid without a date-”
“Well aren’t you going to bring your husband?” Your colleague asks, cutting you off. Just like everyone else on base, she knows thinks you are in fact Mrs Riley, for all intents and purposes. You open your mouth to correct her and tell her you don’t have a husband, when a deep voice comes up behind you and speaks first.
“‘Course she is.” Ghost replies for you, coming to stand behind you in your chair, sneaking a gloved hand onto your shoulder to offer a slight squeeze of acknowledgment. You lean your head back to glance up at him, offering a soft smile that melts his heart more and more each time he’s lucky enough to see it, to be the reason for it. Sensing she’s now the odd one out, your coworker quietly excuses herself and goes to find someone else to talk water cooler gossip with.
“Oh Ghost! Hi!” You say, reaching your own hand up to squeeze his in return, smile widening when you notice the crinkles next to his eyes that you hope mean he’s smiling as well under the mask. “Oh, you really don’t have to. I mean- I wouldn’t want you to waste a day off just to sit through a stranger’s wedding for who knows how many hours. I barely want to go.”
You try to joke about it, but this really has been causing you unnecessary stress. Your sister apparently doesn’t have enough wedding planning on her plate as it is, seeing as she has enough time to constantly pester you about whether you’ve secured a date yet or not, despite your answer always being no. She knows it’s been forever since you’ve dated anyone seriously, and that finding a date will be more of a chore than showing up without one and enduring your relative comments and questions.
Each time you told her no though, your mind wandered to the tall, dark, muscular man who liked to call himself your husband, imagining the looks on your family’s face if you were to show up with Ghost on your arm. But you never bothered to ask him, not wanting to force him into extending his kindness and charade of a happily married couple outside of work hours.
“I’d be with you for those ‘who knows how many hours?’” Ghost asks, quoting you, watching as you offer him a simple nod in return. “Then that’s the farthest thing from a waste o’ time in my books, love.”
As simple as that, the plan was set. Ghost would be your date to the wedding that weekend.
Now, Ghost was used to not having very much to look forward to in life. He could look forward to a hot shower occasionally, look forward to good pub food instead of mess hall dinners, look forward to a chance to sleep in a little later, simpler things of the sort.
But when you came into his life, he was suddenly looking forward to equally simple, but different things. He looked forward to reading your cute replies to his good morning and good night texts (he still never misses a single one, all these months later), looked forward to seeing your sweet smile greeting him when you arrived to work, looked forward to hearing your pleased hum when you took your first sip of whatever drink he prepared you that day. Essentially, he looked forward to seeing you.
Now though, he feels as if this weekend cannot come soon enough, finding himself practically giddy he’s looking forward to spending more time with you off base so much, feeling like a kid who’s itching to get their hands on their new Christmas gifts.
When he arrives at your flat almost a half hour too early (he just couldn’t wait anymore lovie, you can’t blame the poor man), and you open the door to greet him, he doesn’t think it’s fair to compare this to a gift under the Christmas tree.
No. It’s more like he’s won the goddamn lottery.
Standing before him, is the most beautiful, breathtaking vision he’s ever laid eyes upon in all his years. He half wonders if his knees are legitimately beginning to wobble where he stands, he feels so weak in the knees as he gazes upon you in your doorway. It’s still just you, the same woman he’s been seeing every day and dreaming of each night.
But you don’t look like you have every day these past months. Your hair is styled differently, your make up is a little more done up, and the thing that’s really got his mind reeling, is that instead of your regular work attire, you’re wearing a dress so stunning he half wonders whether or not you are the bride this evening. There’s no possible way someone so beautiful is expected to stand on the sidelines tonight, expected to be anyone apart from the star of the show, the centre of his the world.
You don’t take much notice of the way Ghost fails to greet you properly, standing outside your door and practically gawking at you, seeing as you’re preoccupied doing the same to him. His usual fatigues and black everything have been swapped out for black dress pants, a white button up shirt (your eyes definitely do not linger on the top three buttons being left undone, nope, not at all) and a black blazer, matching black surgical mask in exchange for the typical skeleton mask.
You two blushing, bumbling idiots in secret love manage to pull yourselves together enough to make the drive up to the venue, the car ride filled with laughter, stories, and too many stolen glances to count, each of you wishing you could pull the car over somewhere and jump each others bones instead.
At the venue, you go through the obligatory introductions with your family, simply so they couldn’t say you didn’t say hello at least once throughout the busy night, only partially intent on ignoring them later on. They’re left understandably stunned at the mention that the man beside you is your husband, and when your family members begin unloading question after question, the two of you manage to find a quick excuse each time to dash off, giggling and holding onto the other as you weave the growing crowd of guests, all too proud of your little inside joke.
You regretfully tell him that you’ll have to leave him to sit alone throughout the ceremony, though he insists you shouldn’t worry about it, lifting your spirits momentarily when he jokes that you should focus more on not tripping during your walk down the aisle, before the both of you are left bright red in the face at hearing him talking about you walking down an aisle, as if you don’t pretend to be married every day to begin with.
He truly doesn’t mind having to sit on the tiny foldable chairs that make up the seating for the ceremony, it’s only a small portion of the evening after all. And besides, his eyes certainly aren’t on the couple reciting their vows up at the altar. No, his gaze is on one person and one person only. From the moment the music kicked in and pairs of bridesmaids and groomsmen stepped out to walk the aisle in their matching attire and matching smiles, his eyes have been locked on you, just as yours have been locked on his.
His size certainly helped you pick him out of the crowd with more ease, finding him amongst the familiar and unfamiliar faces instantly, as though gravity was pulling your gaze in his direction alone. Later on, neither of you could even correctly point out amongst the groomsmen whose arm you were holding on to as you walked, attention only focused on each other.
Even as you stood up front, listening to your sister and new brother in law profess their love for the other, you tried your best to appear as though you were paying them your full attention, considering you were standing up at the front and all. But it was as though you could literally feel Ghost’s eyes on you the entire ceremony, unable to stop your eyes from straying towards him more times than was surely appropriate, feeling the heat of a blush creep over your cheeks every time you saw how devastatingly handsome he was today.
By the time the newlyweds are marching back down the aisle past their cheering loved ones, wedding party in tow, your eyes are no longer pretending to look anywhere other than at him. And Simon is looking back at you, but his mind is growing preoccupied, thinking of how he can finally ensure you’ll let him walk you down the aisle now.
Because in the glove compartment of the very car he drove you up here in, only inches away from your knees the entire drive, he’s tucked away a small little box, containing the exact ring you chose from the jeweller all those weeks ago. He carries it with him everywhere, eager for the moment, the opportunity to be lucky enough to truly call himself your husband and slip the band over your finger as his wife.
And he’s decided that tonight is the night he tells you.
The night he tells you this has never been a joke to him, never been anything apart from what he really wants to be true from the moment he saw you.
To call you his wife.
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