#I don’t like having a label for my gender at all

[canideformed]

People need to realise that a trans person’s experiences with oppression are far more impacted by things that aren’t as black and white as what specific queer label they identify as.

Living in a community that respects your gender, having the ability to medically transition if you want, especially at a young/er age, being perisex, being white, being abled, being wealthy (inherently tied to how accessible transition is to you), having supportive parents, even the level of gender deviant you’re perceived to be by cis people.

When you’re trans and/or intersex, being straight and/or being a man aren’t privileges. We’re all viewed as gender deviant, and simply identifying as straight or as a man doesn’t change that. Sometimes, the ability to pass can change that.

I can personally attest that, the more I pass as my target gender on any given day, the better I am treated and the less transphobia I experience. If I have a beard and square shoulders when I’m trying to be perceived as a woman, people don’t like it. They also don’t like it when I wear clothes that emphasise my hips when I’m trying to be perceived as a man. This also applies to sexuality. When I was with my ex bf, I was treated better when I was perceived as a woman. This is regardless of my personal orientation (which is actually mostly gay man). Even as a transfemmasc intersex gay (wo)man, the times I was treated the best were the times I could pass for a non-gender/sex/sexuality-deviant woman and when I could pass for a non-gender/sex/sexuality-deviant man. When even one of those things changes, when I was seen as a gay man, or a lesbian, or a trans woman, or a trans man—people start throwing me looks on the street and sometimes even going out of their way to harass me.

And yes! Misogyny does exist. But all gender deviant people experience it (or homophobia, but imo those two are linked anyway, at least based on my experiences being perceived as a woman vs. a gay man).

Similarly, when one of my disabilities becomes visible (if I need my cane or have a shutdown or meltdown, etc.), it impacts the way people treat my trans identity. I deserve less autonomy, the demonisation/infantilisation/both intensifies vastly, etc.

The way these things interact is complicated. I have a complicated transition history due to being intersex and could technically be categorised as “transitioned young,” both on the axis of being transfem and on the axis of being transmasc (it’s complicated!), but it’s honestly not a privilege in that situation because it also came with medical abuse.

TL;DR, an individuals’ level of privilege and an individuals’ experiences with oppression are both complex dynamics that can’t be dumbed down to “men don’t experience misogyny” or “all men have male privilege” or “straight trans people are privileged over gay trans people” or any other black and white statement based purely on one’s personal identity that completely ignores the vast array of intersecting factors as well as simple luck and personal circumstance.

Also—trans people in places like North America or certain parts of Europe will always be privileged over trans people in places with cultural variations and slower acceptance of gender deviation, probably in ways we won’t be able to ever imagine. So listen to trans people who do have those experiences.

[tongues--and--teeth]

Happy Pride to these three specifically

[theflannelwizard]

IN THIS HOUSE WE STAND FOR THE FLAG!! 🇺🇸🏳️‍⚧️

[sadkachow]

“what’s your gender?”

well, you see. it’s.

hm.

it’s yes, but also no, and sometimes maybe!

if you're going to make me wear a coat, i suppose i don't mind the "man" coat, but it does not sum up ALL that i am, understand? it is simply a coat! it is a part of the outfit, something i can put on and wear and take off at will! it is not the whole outfit and it does not define anything more than the terms in which i don't mind being ascribed to myself. all i truly know about my gender is that i am not a woman! everything else is for me to only halfway know and you to not ask about!

[demigirlravenqueen]

share all of your sexuality and gender identity hcs for ever after high pleaseeeeee

Thanks for asking!

I will say that I don’t really have many sexuality headcanons other than “this whole school in so queer coded”, mostly because I can’t even be bothered to put a label on myself lol. That being said hears the few I do have.

Raven: demigirl (as stated in the user name), bi, aspec. I actually made this post a while back her gender and Maddie if you're interested.

Maddie: I like to think that in wonderland they don't really put much of a label on gender or sexuality it just kinda is what it is. I've always thought of them as nonbinary though. (any pronouns)

Darling is the ultimate sword lesbian, Apple I also think is a lesbian.

What else ummm... I also really like trans man Alister. Giles Grim has extreme gay uncle energy. I think Briar is bi, I think Faybel would call herself queer. Oh! aspec Dexter and Circe. I also kind of like the aromantic Sparrow head canon but I also like the idia of him and Duchess as gay man and lesbian friendship.

And that’s all I can think of for now.

[zebrafiz]

this tweet singlehandedly made me go on a gender spiral for 5 days straight that ended with me deciding that i want a binder

[bisexualseraphim]

Do queer people who gatekeep sexualities and gender identities have nothing better to do like genuinely what is your problem. The whole point of the community is that gender and sexuality are more fuckity wuckity than man or woman, gay or straight and in almost 2024 we STILL have mfs going “nah that’s not a thing :/ you don’t belong in the community” unless they’re causing harm to others I seriously urge you to shut the fuck up. It is the easiest thing in the world to just say “hmm I don’t really understand that. But it’s their life and none of my business” and just move on with your life and let people live theirs. I do not give one iota of a fuck if someone identifies as a wolfgender they/them/bun/bunself AMAB transmasc who is only attracted to butches with curly hair and brown eyes IT DOES NOT AFFECT ME. I’m happy that they’ve found a way to express their identity that feels true to them and then I think about it no further. Like it takes active mental energy and emotion to get pressed over how someone expresses themselves and I don’t understand why you’d put yourself through that stress and then decide to be bitchy and make people feel like shit for being themselves. I’m seriously getting so tired of people in the community acting like it’s a fucking competition or you can only join if you meet X Y and Z criteria as if it’s some college mean girls sorority club. People are actively trying to take our rights away all the time and while this is happening we’re helping them by tearing our teeth into our own. Great

[thlassicalamity]

ok pt 2 now with more headcanony versions!! these aren’t necessarily my headcanons but they are all ones I vibe w. are they qp to me? idk! do I think it’s cool and real when ppl write and interpret them as qp? yeah! yknow if anybody has any requests for flags to edit onto them lmk! these are quick & fun & i don’t bite. & either way feel free to use these for whatever!! credit would be swag but is not necessary if u do. have a happy & safe pride everyone!!!

[lightblueminecraftorchid]

Not nonbinary as in “third distinct gender” or “lack of gender”, nonbinary as in “pressure’s off; I don’t have to label whatever the fuck is going on in there”

[lovebloods]

.

[bookwyrminspiration]

i have got to get more queer

[scared-robot]

I wish my lungs were good enough to occasionally bind, but also it’s probably good because I feel like the Trans Realization I’ve kept partially stomped down will pop fully out and I don’t have the bandwidth, money, or anything else to deal with that realization.

[tempestclerics]

.

[staresatyoufromaccrosstheroom]

My gender is weird but not in like trans/gender non conforming way. (To preface this I am from the south and was raised Christian so coming out kinda isn’t an option.) But like my gender is like babysitting your neighbors 3 year old whose across the room from you. And everyone online is saying make sure you’re always watching the kid, they’re known to be handfuls,,,, but like not this one??? Like I look up from my book and he ain’t crying or screaming or drawing on the walls or nothing little man’s just sitting there so I go back to reading. I was born with tits and dresses are nice but makeup is a hassle and I like my long hair but I have shoulders bigger than half the guys in my grade and if my boobs were to fall off tomorrow I’d just kinda shrug and move on and live flat chested. At the moment I’m saying I’m allocishet but if someone were to genuinely ask me about my pronouns idk kid’s not screaming yet so she/her is fine but also if someone started calling me by different pronouns I’d just shrug and see if the new kid starts screaming and if not yeah sure those pronouns are cool too I guess.

[rustinged]

when your friends unknowingly reaffirm your gender presentation 🤾🏽

[ectoplasmer]

squinting really hard at that egogender label again