#I don’t know if tomorrows plans are still on but I’m gonna be in panic mode if she’s still in this monster mood

[starbuck]

this is so funny… i wake up panicking and decide to watch some movies to calm down, watch panic-inducing movies and go “why am i still panicking??”

[yaminerua]

if my mum can be counted on for anything it’s her ability to absolutely ruin my day

[holidayinhell]

CWs: captivity Whump, failed escape Whump.

“I know you have it.”

Whumper outstretched his palm. “Hand it over.”

Whumpee hesitated for a fraction of a second, eyes flickering with defiance and defeat.

As soon as Whumpee dropped the box cutter into his hand, Whumper’s fingers snapped closed around it. His cold gaze fell over the flimsy weapon with a smirk playing at the corners of his lips, just before tucking the cheap plastic knife into his back pocket. 

He shook his head in quiet disbelief.

“Oh, Whumpee…” he sighed.

Whumpee’s cheeks burned with shame. He never intended to use the box cutter maliciously. Or, at least, he knew he would never be capable of killing Whumper. He didn’t have a plan, he never did, he just needed to feel secure before he trying to find a way out of this fucking place.

After all, he was scheduled to die tomorrow. Surely Whumper didn’t expect him to accept his fate willingly. He had to fight back in order to stay alive.

“Sorry.” Whumpee whispered. 

He had so much to say, yet that was all that came out.

“Yeah.” Whumper murmured, “Me too.”

“I’m sorry…” Whumpee’s voice cracked. “Really, I wasn’t gonna hurt you, I, I don’t even think I could…”

“Sure, Whumps. I get it.” Whumper said in a soft, reassuring voice. He shifted awkwardly on his feet, exhaling. “You’ve been through a lot, I know.”

Whumpee’s shoulders sagged and he looked up at Whumper, searching his eyes for an ounce of compassion.

“But you fucked up big time.”

Whumpee’s breath hitched as he heard Whumper’s tone harden, the last trace of sympathy evaporating.

“Get up, Whumpee. I need you to turn around for me.”

His tone made it clear that any illusion of mercy was gone.

“Please. I’m sorry.”  Whumpee’s heartbeat thundered in his ears, panic bubbling in his chest. “I’ll do anything you want from here out, I’ll be good, I’ll listen--” 

Whumper laughed, a low, bitter sound. “Doesn’t make much of a difference now.”

“Turn around.”

“Please, just, give me a break. Just tonight. It’s my last night, I, I won’t try anything, please I swear to you!” Whumpee’s composure shattered as he choked out the words. “J-just, please, let me have tonight...”

“No.”

His gaze settled on Whumpee’s tear-streaked face.

“Sorry, Whumpee. You fucked up."

Whumper locked a pair of zip ties together behind Whumpee’s back. He instructed Whumpee to climb onto his cot, and made quick work of locking his ankles together too.

Tears gushed down Whumpee’s cheeks as the plastic ties snapped snugly into place.

“A box cutter. Really Whumpee?” Whumper’s grin grew, savoring the irony. “You risked it all, and that was your weapon of choice?”

Whumpee’s throat tightened, dread coiling in his stomach. His shoulders ached from the forced position, but he barely noticed, his mind was consumed with absolute terror. He could barely bring himself to look up as Whumper loomed over him.

“I’d laugh if it wasn’t so goddamn pitiful.” The tall man’s voice dripped with contempt. “The worst part is, well, I was gonna go easy on ya tomorrow. I picked up some good painkillers and booze to make it more comfortable for you.”

"You did?" Whumpee’s voice quivered, the hope fading from his eyes. “...really?”

“Heh, yeah. I wasn’t even going to tie you up.” 

Whumper leaned in, his tone dropping to a menacing whisper. “But now, comfort is off the table.”

Tears streamed down Whumpee’s cheeks. “I didn’t mean t--”

“But you did,” Whumper cut him off. “You did, and you went and fucked it all up didn’t ya?”

“I thought you liked me...” Whumpee mumbled, his words nearly swallowed by his own shame. “...don’t do this.”

Whumper shook his head as he rose to his feet. “It’s okay. You can still sleep on your side.”

“Whumper! PLEASE!”

“I can’t help you.” 

Whumper’s figure cast a long dark shadow across the wall next to the cot. 

Whumpee watched as the tall silhouette crossed into the light, swinging the heavy door closed with a thud, submerging Whumpee in total blackness.

((more Whump oneshots))

[mimasroom2]

Bunny baby ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ♡

Ellie x reader w ptsd

𓂋

ʚ♡ɞ

I was inspired by @elliezlils11utt fic of Ellie x hypersexual reader and it reminded me I’ve always wanted to write some Ellie hcs that can help my ptsd :)

This is specifically with Jackson!ellie bc she’s my favorite :3

C/w: ptsd obviously. A bit of smut. Mostly fluff tho :3. Flashbacks. Intrusive memories. Triggers. MDNI 😒

W/c: ≈ 800

~

- It depends on how you guys met + how your relationship started,, but you’d definitely be super shy ab your trauma & ptsd and would avoid telling her as long as you can.

- When you finally tell her she’d be soooo sweet☹️. She’d sit you guys down on the couch and sit across from you criss cross applesauce style

- You wipe your tears away and laugh a little at how cute she is. Like why’d she have to go and sit like that ?!!

- You don’t feel nervous with her per se,,, but you feel kinda weird uncanny and naked (in a gross way) talking ab this, so most of the time when ur ranting you’ll focus on her eyebrow scar.

- You talk for as long as you want to and Ellie listens and nods and holds ur hand if u start crying ☹️☹️

- Surprisingly she doesn’t say anything like “whoever did this to you is gonna fuckin’ pay ‘mkay??” Because yknow….. she’s Ellie. She doesn’t want to rile you or herself up and make you uncomfortable >•<

- When you’re done explaining she’s gonna hug you and ask to kiss you. She’ll reassure you and say “Thank you for telling me baby. Now that I know I can try to help you in any way I can,, and I’ll stick by your side no matter what.” She giggles as she pulls you in closer :))))

- She’ll try to understand your triggers but sometimes it’s really hard for her to. “Fuck I’m so sorry princess.. was it what I said or like.. the way I said it?”

- The truth is she LOVESSS cuddling and if you’re ever upset she knows it’ll for sure calm you down.

- Even if ur trauma isn’t related to sex she’d still be careful and sweet with you. Like,,, you’d have to BEG her to degrade you.

- “Els please… I know what im asking for I literally think it’s so hot when you do it🙁”

- “Angel idk if it’s really a good idea bc you had all those intrusive memories today..”

- “Ellie if you don’t degrade me I literally don’t think I will cum.”

- And then she perks up and yelps “ON IT!” 😭😭😭

- During the middle of it she’d literally stop and ruin it😭 “Yeah? You fuckin’ like these fingers huh babe? God such a fuckin’ slut for me..” she whispers in your ear”… heyyy is this like… still okay or? I dunno just seemed weird.” As you were like MOANING AND WHIMPERING

- You playfully smack her face “YES ELLIE please just- you don’t have to hold back!”

- Aftercare would be hugeeee for the both of you. Just in general Ellie really needs it but especially for you.

- “Jus’ don’t wanna hurt my princess after I’m done fucking your cute pussy” she looks down at you and you squeal for her to stop and cover your face with your hands.

- She laughs and rubs your back and starts talking casually about what her plans are for tomorrow.

- Sometimes you feel guilty that you’re taking up most of the attention in the relationship bc of your ptsd but she immediately interrupts your rambling and reassures you ♡

- If you have nightmares she’d wake you up and cuddle + distract you until you were tired enough to fall asleep again.

- Maybe if you were in the mood she’d distract you by eating you out 🤭

- If you ever felt uncomfortable or had a panic attack or flashback in public she’d take you home immediately even if it was inconvenient.

- “No babe.. what the fuck no.. it was not your fault okay. Getting scared is never your fault.” She tilts your chin up (,,•o•,,) “Let’s just try to calm down, yeah? That’s my girl.”

- Ellie hears ab service animals for ptsd and since Jackson really only has horses she managed to find you a BUNNY

- “Ellie how the fuck WHERE THE FUCK DID YOU FIND THIS BUNNY?!!,??.!.”

- “Don’t be scared babbbbbeeee I just got it somewhere okay?” She smiles all mischievous and lifts the brown bunny up. Its nose twitches.

- “Who’d you have to trade? WHAT did you trade actually??” Your eyes grow wide.

- “Jus’ got it from Tommy baby,,, no big deal.” She sits down on her knees to put it in the cage she got. “Found this cage jus’ lyin’ there. Asked around and nobody needed it.”

- After a few hours of playing with your new bunny you kiss her cheek in bed and whisper “Really, Els. Where’d the damn bunny come from.”

- “Really I already told you! Got it from Tommy… I was uh.. askin’ about like what he thought would be good for ptsd and he told me about a time where people would have dogs and other animals trained to help people. I dunno I thought it was cool.” She smiles sheepishly.

- You think that is the sweetest thing EVER because you thought she just finally wanted a pet for the two of you (❀❛ ֊ ❛„)♡

~

I’m actually gonna melt why do ppl never write sweet Ellie 😞💘

[crybabycinna]

I saw this TikTok using this audio being like oh I’m in jail I need your help and the person on the other end being like wait your in jail so this means this is your only phone call and the person in jail is like yeah and then the other person hangs up the phone someone was like this is Jason and tim and I was like nah Jason not calling Tim 🤣 I was like Jason’s calling Roy not Tim but he still don’t answer and someone was like yeah but then he’s still calling Tim after and I’m like he can’t if that’s his one phone call 🤣 SO BECAUSE OF THAT TIKTOK HERES A LIST MY BF AND I MADE OF WHO JASON IS CALLING WAY BEFORE TIM!

1. Roy because besties but like I said Roy don’t answer because he got a baby to deal with

2. Rose but she not coming to get him she like damn that’s crazy I’m doing stuff with my dad

3. Starfire and she’s probably coming to get him because that’s her brother in law and her bestie

4. Artemis (his lil boo thang) she not coming she cussing him out like no tomorrow asking him how stupid he could be probably going up there to actually laugh at him and still call him stupid (she might break him out later cause she miss her little spoon in the bed)

5. Bizaro he answered but Artemis told him he can’t go so he had to tell Jason she said no

6. Damian but see he know Damian is gonna tell Grayson and Grayson is gonna panic and go get his brother while Damian laughing BUT BUT! He might not tell Grayson and just got get Jason just way later but he gonna get him

7. Talia mama coming to get her son but see he know if he call she dragging him back to the league

8. Harley but she already in jail so they just probably figure out an escape plan

9. Grayson but he’s probably busy with Kory and also idc I feel like that man never answer the phone he just be showing up at the manor excepting whatever sibling that called to just be there

Jason is not calling Bruce that’s not a fucking option fuck Bruce 🤣

[swee7dream]

slowly but surely zhong chenle x f!reader

genres agere content, angst, fluff warnings internalized anti-agere, mention of a panic attack but not in depth. lmk if i missed any ! wc 2.3k dni if you sexualize age regression

summary it's the end of the year but you are finding it very difficult to be in celebratory mood.

dni: if you sexualize age regression and/or have an 18+ blog.

You’re going to quit your job.

You are, you’re making a promise to yourself about it and you have already decided to honor the promises you make to yourself this coming year. You are going to quit your job and nothing is going to stand in your way this time.

Only your boss would talk about an end-of-year party as a ‘compulsory team meeting’. You were supposed to have a nice simple evening with Chenle at home, making dinner together and then watching the fireworks until one of you falls asleep. A nice simple evening that did not have you hyperventilating in the bathroom out of fear you would be let go.

The plan was to stop by the store as soon as you finished your shift to ensure you got the freshest ingredients for the pesto pasta recipe you found on Pinterest and get more than the advised portions because you know for a fact half of it will end up on your kitchen floor when the play-fighting gets out of hand.

It was meant to be a night of relaxing and reflecting and not any of what you are feeling right now: stressed, angry, and murderous.

You take a sniff of your clothes as you walk from the bus stop back home, wondering if you can still wear this jacket out tomorrow or if you’ll smell like you bathed in alcohol fully dressed. Moisture seeps through your boot and into your sock from a puddle you didn’t notice on the sidewalk a couple of minutes back and you feel your entire body rejecting the sensation.

You mumble to yourself while doing quick work of inputting the PIN code to your front door lock, squeezing your eyes tight in an attempt to bring moisture back to your dried-out eyes.

‘Bath, color, cuddle, sleep. Bath, color, cuddle, sleep. Bath, color, cuddle, sleep!’

The plan for the night repeats like a broken record in your mind, mentally pushing yourself to go on just a little longer. You let out a sigh of relief when the lock finally sings its tune of entrance after three failed attempts.

“There’s my girl. I thought someone was trying to break in or something.”

The mental image of you talking with your dolls and stuffed animals shatters like a priceless vase, the shards amounting to the grains of sand in the sea.

“Hi.” You drop your bag on the floor the second you have a foot inside. You were so excited about tonight, how could you forget so quickly? Your boyfriend is so excited to see you and all you can think about is how you want everyone to die, that’s rich.

“Hey.” Chenle’s smile drops at your lack of enthusiasm. “You okay?”

“Okay… Just tired. ‘m gonna take a bath, ‘kay?” Your lips barely part as you speak and your feet don’t lift an inch from the floor, shuffling down the hallway instead. Tongue trapped between your teeth, you stop yourself from saying something you’ll regret on the way to the bathroom.

—

Your own gasp wakes you and you find that you’ve fallen asleep in the tub. How long have you been asleep? The water’s not exactly warm anymore and you see your fingertips have pruned up like raisins. You poke at them while leaning over the edge before sighing. Chenle’s out there waiting for you, you remind yourself, you can’t just stay pruned up like this forever.

Only for a little bit longer. You hug your knees to your chest and rest your cheek on one of them as you watch all the water from your bath swirl down the drain like a whirlpool. You can’t help but blow your lips together, mimicking the sounds you think pirates caught in a whirlpool would make.

A knock at the door.

“Everything alright in there?”

“Uh, yeah. Sorry. I’m getting dressed now. I’ll be right there.” The sound of your voice surprises you, feeling it’s much deeper than it should be for some reason.

The heat coming up from the vents is still too cold for you and although you know you should keep moving to feel warm, you find it much more comfortable to just stand in place on the rug.

Water drips off you and onto the rug and the towel wrapped tight around you where you shiver. Your hair is wet and heavy and if looks could kill, the shirt you planned to change into would be on fire at the moment. The feeling of heavy, damp hair wetting your new shirt makes you roll your eyes a bit, but the knowledge of your boyfriend on the other side of the door pushes you to endure it.

You’re in your own home but you sure don’t act like it, shuffling shyly out of the bathroom with uncertain steps.

“Le?”

“Oh.” He looks up from the shelf he was carefully inspecting before. “Hey baby. Good bath?”

“…yeah. What are you holding?”

“This?” He lifts his hand. “It’s one of your crayons. I found it lying on the floor and was just looking where to put it back.”

“It’s not mine,” You state firmly with a swift snatch. “It’s my nephew’s. He came over recently.”

“…your nephew colors with glitter crayons?” Chenle tries not to eye the grip you have that crayon in.

“Yeah. He does. Is that a problem?” You tuck the crayon into the pocket of your pajama pants quickly and make your way over to the kitchen.

“It’s not a problem, I just didn’t know he moved on so fast from his ‘arts and crafts is boring’ stage.”

“He’s coming around to it.” You move around the kitchen quickly, filling and turning on the kettle.

“Good for him.” Chenle stands slowly, when did his back start hurting like this? Is he getting old? Well, he is already balding. But that’s because of the hair dye, right? It’ll grow back. Probably.

“Yeah.” You toss a tea bag into a mug. “That’s just how kids are. Thank you for finding it.”

“Mhm.”

He takes notice of how you haven’t made eye contact with him since you snatched the crayon from him, how you still don’t. You try cracking your knuckles and wrists again and again, ignoring the fact that you already did before and nothing will pop for the next while or so.

You’re lying.

Why are you lying?

“Well, now I’m jealous.” Chenle leans on the counter with his forearms, teasing smile gently nudging you to at least look his way. “How come that little kid gets to color with my girlfriend when even I haven’t done that before?”

You don’t reply but his eyes follow how you swallow an invisible lump in your throat.

“It’s not like we have the ingredients to cook dinner tonight anyway, why don’t we just spend our home date tonight just coloring? You have more crayons, right?”

“No,” You reply immediately, turning away to get the kettle when it dings. “He just left this one. Why would I have any crayons? Do you think I’m a five-year-old?”

“I never said that.” He stands up, a frown of confusion painting his face.

“Right. Well, I don’t have any of those. And I don’t want to do a coloring date. I’m dating an adult, I would like to feel like I am.”

“Adults can color.”

“No they can’t.”

“Why not?”

“Because they can’t.”

The kitchen is quiet, the single noise of the spoon mixing the tea and honey in your mug. With each second of silence, the control you have on your breathing weakens.

You do want to color. You want to doodle and draw and give Chenle all your stickman drawings. You want him to show you his pictures and you want to hear him praise the color you chose for the sun’s sunglasses. You want him to color with you and play with you until you’re all tired out. When you’re asleep you want him to cradle you and cuddle you, kiss you on the forehead, and hum you lullabies in an undertone.

But it’s also so unreasonable to demand that.

He has a life just as stressful if not more than yours, to throw all your burdens on him to bear, even if just for a few hours, is wrong. You would feel too guilty. Chenle’s dating an adult, not babysitting a child. Dating you should be an option, not a burden.

“They can’t?”

“They can’t.” You shake your head, voice breaking.

Chenle takes you into arms before you fully break, leaving all your tears to stain his t-shirt. His fingers dig into your hair and your whole body shivers when you feel his nails gently scratch against your scalp.

“I’m going to be honest with you, Princess, I don’t really know what happened today. Or if it’s something you’ve been dealing with for a long time… Either way, I’m sorry. If I’m the reason you’re crying right now, I’m sorry. And I’m also sorry for not knowing what I’ve done wrong. I’m kind of slow on the uptake at times. If I’m not the reason you’re crying, I’m sorry you went through that, or, are going through that. I don’t really know…

“You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. You looked like you were about to drop dead as soon as you walked in tonight so I wouldn’t blame you. I probably should have left earlier but I couldn’t help it. It’s the last day of the year and I really wanted to spend it with you. I’m kind of clingy like that, I guess. I was on my way here and… I was thinking how I would be ending this year and starting this next year with you and- and I wanted this to be how every year will be. Forever. Or, until you don’t it want to. Because I don’t feel like I will ever not want to be with you. I’m like… obsessed with you. But not to a point where I won’t leave if you tell me to leave. I definitely will leave if you ask me to leave. Do you want me to go? I can go. You look tired and I’m keeping you up-”

“No.” You interrupt, speaking into his chest. “Stay.”

“Okay. Yeah, I’ll stay.”

“But… I think I am gonna nap.”

“Yeah… Yeah, you should. I’ll just stay out here.”

“You’re an idiot.” You blurt. “A big dumb idiot. You’re dumb.”

“…yeah.”

“Want you to nap with me. Cuddle. Carry me.”

“Carry you…?” Chenle looks down at you, feeling whiplash at how quickly your moods change. He doesn’t question it though, melting at the sight of your big watery eyes. “Yeah, okay. Your wish is my command.”

You smile as you feel his arms wrap around you, his cologne entering your nose and giving you an incomparable high. His steps are slow and uncertain, careful to not hit your head on any doorframes. He begins lowering you onto the bed but your arms don’t loosen around his neck.

“Sorry too.” You whisper.

“For what?”

“Callin’ you dumb. You’re not dumb.”

“Thank you.” Chenle smiles, his eyes disappearing into thin little moons. “But, I am actually a little dumb.”

“No.” You frown as if the person offended was you. “Not dumb.”

“No?”

“No.” You insist. “’m the dummy.”

“What? No, Princess.” He sits on the side of the bed when his neck begins to hurt from the angle. “How could you think that?”

“’Cause,” Your eyes drop to his shirt, suddenly extremely interested in the wrinkles of his shirt. “Dunno. Thought you wouldn’t like me.”

“Wouldn’t like you? Baby, why would I not like you?”

“’Cause ‘m a dummy!” You whisper-yell at him as if he wasn’t listening. “Was bein’ mean earlier and takin’ stuff and… just wasn’t bein’ nice. And then I thought that you wouldn’t like me if I… I dunno.”

“If what?”

“If there was like… a side o’ me you didn’t really like. ‘n’ I scared you away… Don’t wanna be a bother, y’know?”

“You’re not a bother, Baby.” Chenle presses a kiss to your temple. “You’re my responsibility. I choose to do all these things. You’re never a bother. Never ever. Even if you get sick or get kicked out of your house or… I don’t know. No matter what, I choose to stay with you.”

“What if you choose to stop staying with me?”

“Did you kill someone?”

“No?”

“Then I think we can work through it.”

You giggle and lean back into him. He says such silly things with such confidence that he almost makes you believe it. Maybe one day you will.

“Oh shoot, your tea. I’ll be right back.”

The bed creaks under you as he gets up, the fireworks of overly-zealous celebrators with seemingly broken clocks lighting up his side profile pinks and purples through the window.

You stare at him and feel a warmth grow deep in your heart, an uncontrollable smile painted on your face. Chenle looks back at you with a confused smile, but you can see the same love in your heart in his eyes.

Yeah.

You also think that this is right. You don’t know if it’s for forever yet, but you sure hope it will be. That this year and the next and all the years until you’re both stars in the sky you two will be together. The fireworks will light up your faces when you’re both wrinkly and gray, wearing the same dorky grins you wear tonight.

You’re afraid, but you can feel that soon you’ll introduce a new side of yourself to Chenle. As he gets in the bed with you, looking out the window of your bedroom with his arm around your waist, the anxiety is the tiniest bit smaller than it was this morning. Slowly but surely, you know in your heart the day when you can show your heart bare to him will come and you’re not afraid

Maybe you’re afraid now but you know it’s only a matter of time before you free fall into his arms without a second thought. It's inevitable, you smile to yourself.

a/n: STRESSING to post this before the new year lolz. also, i hope y'all know that reader was toned down SO much over the drafts. when i get overstimulated i start wanting ppl to die and it's never that serious...... i rly had to get rid of that quality when writing for reader LOLOLOL OK ENJOY REBLOG GIVE KUDOS ALL THAT STUFF THAT TUMBLR LIKES LOVE U ALL HOPE U HAVE THE BESTEST 2024

[secretswiftymarvelfan]

Boston Bears: Off-Limits - Rugby Player!Chris x Reader (Part 9)

Summary: It the championship final and this weekend turns out to be more explosive than anyone imagined

Word Count: 7.1k

Warnings: Fluff! Angst! Talk of Panic Attacks! Serious Injury! Language! SMUT! 18+ ONLY! MINORS DNI!

Rugby Explained

Dividers by Me!

Series Masterlist / Masterlist

Chapter 9

The past week had been the most intense week that you’ve had in a while. The Bears had not only secured their home semifinal but they had won it too. The only downside was that the LA Lions had won their semifinal which meant they would be facing one another once again. On the bright side, the Bears finished 2nd in the league, while the Lions finished 4th meaning the final would be played here in Boston.

The play-off period was always intense, with every member of the team on and off the pitch working overtime to ensure the players were in the best position to play and hopefully win. The medical team had been working hard to make sure every player was fit and the team had been putting in extra training hours, studied the lions closely to find any weaknesses. Following the last meeting with the Lions, the Bears were out for blood, Chris more so than anyone. It was almost a derby-level rivalry now.

When Friday evening rolled around everyone was looking forward to a chilled night ahead of the final tomorrow. You more so than anyone, when you finally got back to your apartment you were looking forward to a nice alcoholic beverage and just chilling either in the bath or on the couch.

You had just changed out of your work gear and into some comfies when you heard your phone ringing. You grabbed your phone, a warm smile forming on your face when you saw it was Chris.

“I swear to god if you’re calling me to say you’ve injured yourself Evans” you said as you picked up.

Chris’ deep laughter filtered through the phone “No I’m good, Langley might get injured tomorrow though” 

You let out a small sigh, Bryce’s ban following his red card was over now meaning he was back playing just in time for the final. You knew he’d too be out for blood and just hoped he didn’t get his way. 

“As long as it doesn’t get you sent off” you warned him.

“Don’t worry about that, I know how to keep it clean and legal” he said, a smirk clear in his voice “I was wondering what you planned to do tonight?”

“Oh uh nothing really, the medical team stayed pretty late to make sure everything was ready for tomorrow so I’m just looking forward to just relaxing since tomorrow will be pretty intense,” you told him as you walked out of your bedroom and into your living room.

“Ah good because I know exactly what you should do to relax”

You arched a brow “Oh really what’s that?” You asked, but before Chris got the chance to answer you heard your buzzer go “Oh hold on there’s someone at the door” You pressed your phone to your shoulder as you walked over and answered the intercom “Hello?”

“You gonna let me up or not?” You heard Chris say.

You furrowed your brows in confusion not sure for a moment whether his voice was coming from your phone or your intercom. 

“Chris?” 

“Yeah buzz me in already” he chuckled.

You blinked a couple of times before doing what he said and buzzed him in. You stepped to the side and opened the door, still not quite believing Chris was actually here. That was until you saw him appear with a grin and a bag full of something. 

“Hey,” he grinned as he walked over and greeted you with a kiss.

“Hi” you said breathlessly “what- what are you doing here?” You asked as you shut the door behind him.

“You said it yourself, tomorrow is gonna be intense so we should relax tonight, and I have just what we need” he smiled holding up the bag he held.

“What you got in there?” You asked as you tried to get a peak.

“It’s a surprise, one that I’ll need a little bit of time to set up” he explained.

“How long?”

“Long enough for you to have a relaxing bath” he grinned, You couldn’t help the small moan that escaped your lips at the idea which made his grin widen “So why don’t you go relax while I set this up?”

“I like the idea of that, got anything alcoholic in there?” You asked.

“Of course, I’ll bring you something,” Chris said as he gently pushed you in the direction of your bathroom.

A short while later you were relaxing in a nice warm bath, surrounded by bubbles. Chris then poked his head in holding a glass of wine for you.

“Perfect thank you,” you said with a grateful smile “Are you drinking tonight?”

Chris shook his head “No, gotta keep the head clear for tomorrow but don’t feel like you can’t”

“I won’t” you smirked as you took a healthy sip making Chris chuckle.

His gaze then dipped from your lips to below the waterline, his tongue poking out to quickly wet his lips.

“When do I need to get out?” You asked, but Chris didn’t seem to notice you had been talking until you cleared your throat loudly.

“Hm? Sorry what?” He hummed shaking his head his eyes finally returning to yours.

You chuckled at him “I asked when I needed to get out for?” 

“Oh,” Chris said as he quickly checked his watch “Um everything should be ready in 30 minutes” 

“Okay perfect, I look forward to my surprise” You grinned. 

30 minutes later you were out of the bath and back into some comfies, the smell of something delicious wafting through the air in the apartment. You followed the smell grinning when you saw Chris standing in your kitchen wearing your apron which you rarely used yourself. It looked absolutely tiny on Chris.

“Smells delicious,” you said as you walked in and wrapped your arm around his waist.

“The best thing about pre-match days is I can eat a shit ton of carbs and it is part of the diet plan” Chris grinned as he wrapped his arm around you “So I thought since we both had a pretty intense day today and tomorrow will be the same, I thought I’d cook us some spaghetti bolognese”

You hummed in appreciation “The perfect comfort meal, have you got garlic bread?” You asked with an arched brow.

Chris looked down at you offended “Of course I have garlic bread, I’m not a heathen!” 

You laughed patting his chest “was only checking, shall I set the table?” You asked nodding to the bare table.

“No it’s okay I’ve got it sorted already” he said making you furrow your brows in confusion.

“Are you sure you didn’t hit your head? Because the table is not set” you said pointing to the table.

Chris chuckled “I know that, just trust me,” he said as he started plating up “Follow me, sweetheart”

You did as you were told and followed Chris out of your kitchen and into your living room. Your lips parted in surprise and your heart melted when you saw what Chris had done. He’d set up a picnic under the stars right there in your living room. A blanket was spread out, candles lit on the coffee table and strings of lights hanging over your window. It looked incredible, you even considered asking Chris if you could keep the string lights.

“Chris…” you muttered in disbelief. 

“You like it?” He asked with a look on his face that almost looked bashful.

“I-I love it, but why?” You asked as you both sat down on the floor in front of your coffee table.

Chris shrugged as he gave you a boyish “why not? Do I need a reason to spoil you?”

You tried to think of a reason but drew a blank, you chuckled and shook your head “I guess not, thank you either way”

“You're welcome, to hopefully a Bears win tomorrow” Chris smiled holding up his glass of water.

“To a Bears win tomorrow” you smiled tapping your wine glass against his.

“Now let’s tuck in before it gets cold,” Chris said nodding to the food.

“Don’t need to tell me twice” you chuckled before tucking in. 

As you ate you couldn’t help but glance over at Chris periodically. Something had definitely changed between you two and you weren’t sure when. You could say it was the weekend in LA, or when he picked you back up after your night out with the ticket office mean girls, but neither of those answers seemed right. It had just been a gradual shift since the moment you started this agreement.

You started to wonder what kind of relationship this was now because it certainly wasn’t casual anymore. Casual wasn’t unloading all your trauma on your partner, casual wasn’t starting a fight with the other's ex, casual wasn’t setting up starlight picnics just for the hell of it. But you couldn’t call it a relationship either.

You didn’t get to think more about it and frankly, you didn’t want to either, it seemed like a slippery slope to you getting confused and hurt. Now wasn’t the time, Chris didn’t need to be distracted by your relationship questions and you needed to be focused too. It could wait til later.

To your relief when Chris sat back down from taking the empty plates into the kitchen he wrapped his arm around you and pulled you closer to him. You smiled softly as you looked over at him, he smiled back in return before hooking his finger under your chin tilted your head back and kissed you. You melted into the kiss, all intrusive thoughts leaving your mind at his touch.

The hunger and desire you had for him won out as you cupped his cheeks and shifted so you were stranding his hips. Chris groaned his hands moving to rest on your back as he held you close. This kiss deepened as his hands slipped under your top, his hands heating up your skin.

The heat from his hands spread through your body and down south. Your hips rolled against his causing the both of you to moan, Chris’ grip on you tightened.

“I need you” you murmured in between kisses. The three words felt deeper than they ever had before like they meant more than just needing his body.

“I need you too” Chris muttered as he lifted his hips, his hand reached into his pocket and pulled out a condom.

You smirked as you took it from him and stood up long enough to remove your shorts and top. As you did so Chris did the same with his top and sweatpants, his erection standing proud. You ripped the wrapper open and kneeled back down and rolled it on, Chris moaning as you did so.

You gave him a lopsided grin as you leaned in and kissed him as you moved back to straddle his hips. Chris gripped your ass as he guided you down onto him, you moaning into the kiss as you did so. 

Once you were fully seated you tilted your head back, something Chris took full advantage of by pressing kisses down you next and to your chest. You moaned and rolled your hips when his mouth found your sensitive peaks, giving each equal attention. 

One of his hands rested on your back, holding you close, while the other was on your hip guiding your movements. It wasn’t long until you were chanting his name like a prayer, hips rolling feverishly as you searched for your peak. 

Chris leaned in to whisper in your ear “I want to feel you finish” he nibbled on your ear and that was all you needed to fall off the edge into oblivion. 

When your movements stuttered as your orgasm rocked your body, Chris took over as he chased his own end. One that he found shortly after yours with a loud moan of your name.

With your chest still heaving, Chris cupped your cheek and pulled you in for a deep kiss “I wish I could do this every day” he murmured only barely audible.

You searched his eyes for a moment, your hand running through his hair as you did so. You tried to understand the meaning behind his words, whether he meant them in a casual way or more seriously. You weren’t sure what answer you wanted. You didn’t know what you wanted. Your mind and thoughts were jumbled, two different answers pulled at you, one from the chest and one from your head.

You already knew it wasn’t a question you could ask tonight. You had time to try and work out what it was you even wanted. You couldn’t ask Chris what he wanted if you didn’t know what answer you wanted. So you’d wait, wait until you had your answer, wait until after the championship was won or lost.

You barely slept last night. Not because Chris had kept you up. No, he’d left last night so he’d get a good night’s sleep ahead of the game because ‘you’re far too tempting to just sleep next to’. 

You’d had another one of your panic attacks. Now that you knew what they were it was less scary. You didn’t feel the need to rush to the bathroom. You’d just take a few deep breaths like Chris had told you and wait to fall back asleep.

But last night you just couldn’t fall back asleep. You’re mind just kept whirring trying to work out what you wanted. One moment you thought you knew only for the next moment to tell you something different. Every time you looked over at your alarm clock an hour had passed and you were still wide awake.

Needless to say, you were pretty exhausted and running on coffee to get you through the day. By the time you got to the stadium, you felt more awake but still pretty distracted. Too distracted for a game as important as this.

So you found somewhere quiet and private to call Tommi. If you couldn’t talk to Chris about all this, maybe talking it through with Tommi would help.

“Hey I didn’t expect to hear from you today, it’s the final this afternoon isn’t it?” Tommi said as she picked up.

“Yeah, in a couple hours I just got to the stadium, are you gonna be watching?” You asked, already knowing the answer would be no even if her last encounter with Ari might suggest otherwise.

“No you know rugby isn’t my thing,” she said making you chuckle, “but I might keep up to date with the score”

“Well I guess I can settle for that” you smirked.

“So what’s up? Has something happened with you and Chris?” She asked making you let out a long sigh “What did he do?”

“Nothing” you instantly defended him “Nothing bad anyway”

“Right,” Tommi said slowly.

“It’s just something has changed between us, it doesn’t feel casual anymore” you explained as you leant up against the wall.

“And is that a good thing or bad thing?” 

“I don’t know, whenever I think about either option it doesn’t feel right and I want the other option” you sighed.

“Right well logically you’re either gonna end it with him or it becomes more serious” Tommi said “So how would you feel if you ended it?”

“Shit” you responded instantly, you didn’t need to think about it at all.

“Okay and how would you feel if it was more serious?”

You took more time with this question. Trying to search your brain for an answer but falling short “I-i don’t know” you muttered looking down.

“I see” Tommi hummed.

“I just-“ you started, feeling the need to justify your answer “part of me does and part of me doesn’t and I don’t know which part is larger”

“Have you spoken to Chris about all this?” Tommi asked.

“No, I only started questioning all this last night when he came over and didn’t want to distract him before today” you sighed.

“What happened last night?” 

“He surprised me by coming around and cooking me dinner and making a starlight picnic using string lights” you told her unable to stop the smile that crept onto your face when you recalled it.

“That’s very sweet” Tommi commented.

“Yeah, it was” you sighed softly.

“Can I tell you what I think?” Tommi said gently.

“Sure,” you said, maybe she could make sense of it all.

“I think you love him” 

You went to protest but couldn’t bring yourself to outright deny it “We’ve only known each other a couple of months” you managed to say.

“Time doesn’t matter when it comes to love, I knew I loved Dan pretty quick” Tommi said softly.

“But you knew, I don’t, I don’t know if I love him or not“ you argued “Even if I did I don’t think he loves me”

“Look I don’t know for certain but I saw the way you looked at each other in LA” Tommi told you.

“I thought you were too busy arguing with Levinson” you smirked.

Tommi let out a funny-sounding and awkward scoff-like laugh “No I wasn’t” she retorted “but anyway I saw what I think is a lot of love between you two”

You let out a long sigh “Do you really think so” you asked quietly.

“I couldn’t tell you for certain but I think so, but you should talk to Chris about all this after the match” Tommi told you softly.

“But I don’t even know what I want or if I even love him or not” you sighed shaking your head. 

“That’s okay but a relationship is between two people, you need to talk about all this with Chris, tell him how you feel and find out what he feels and work out what you both want to do together” 

“Okay,” you whispered.

“It’s scary, I know but I also know you’ll work it out because you are the strongest person I know” Tommi reassured you.

“Thank you Tommi,” you said “I really wish you were here”

“I wish you were here, but I don’t think you’ll be coming back here will you?” 

“No, so unless you want to relocate to the east coast,” you said hopefully.

“Sorry but no, Cali is where I need to be” she sighed.

“It was worth a shot, maybe you can visit in the summer” you suggested.

“I’d love that, once you know what’s going on with you and Chris you let me know when will be a good time for me to visit” Tommi smiled.

“Sounds good, I better get going, we’ve got a lot of prep to do still and my dad’s probably looking for me,” you told her.

“Okay, good luck,” Tommi said “I know very little about rugby but I hope Chris absolutely murders Bryce” 

You laughed “Me too, I’ll talk to you later, hopefully with some good news”

“Talk to you tomorrow when you recover from your celebratory hangover” Tommi said making you chuckle.

“Tomorrow it is” you agreed before hanging up.

You took a moment to take a few deep breaths before making your way out towards the medical room. Chatting with Tommi had made the noise in your head quieten, even if you did now wonder whether what you felt for Chris was love or not.

The next couple hours were a blur, a good distracting blur, and before you knew it you were in the changing room helping the players get ready to play the match of their lives. 

You were giving Johnny some quick physio when he glanced around the room before gesturing for you to move closer so he could say something to you “Don’t you worry about today I’m gonna make sure Bryce sees the business end of my boots during rucks today” he whispered.

You pulled back suddenly, eyes darting over to Chris scared that he might have told someone what you’d told him.

Johnny must have seen the panic on your face because he was quick to clarify “Oh shit no, I don’t know what Langley did, Chris hasn’t said a word and you don’t have to either, I just put two and two together and realised he must have done something and I just wanted to know we’ve got your back, all of us”

Your shoulders dropped in relief “Thanks Storm, you’re a really good friend” you said “You’re a really caring and soft guy behind that player look”

Johnny gave you a bashful smile before switching it up to his trademark lopsided smirk “Don’t blow my cover”

You tapped your nose “Secret is safe with me” you grinned before grabbing your bag.

You glanced around the changing room looking to see if anyone else needed help. Chris caught your attention as he lifted his hand and pointed to his wrist. You nodded and moved your way through the room to him. Dumping your bag on the floor by his feet before grabbing the tape.

“How you feeling?” You asked as you began strapping up his wrist.

“Confident” Chris grinned “The atmosphere is electric already”

“The crowd here are on another level” you agreed.

“How about you?” He asked, your gaze met his and realised he wasn’t talking about the match, he meant how did you feel about Bryce being here.

You took a deep breath as you took stock of how you felt. While your mind didn’t feel completely at rest while you pondered what relationship you wanted and how you felt, you weren’t thinking about Bryce. You almost felt at peace with the whole situation.

“I’m good” you admitted as you finished strapping up his wrist.

Chris gave you a soft smile “Good” he said as he took the tape from you, putting it away in your kitbag. 

“Glad to see you kept your medal” he grinned as he passed you back your bag, referencing the player of the match medal he snuck into your kit bag after the match in LA.

You chuckled and shrugged your shoulders “Thought it might be a good luck charm” you admitted as you stepped away.

A short while later you were pitch side waiting for kick-off. The atmosphere was insane, almost indescribable. You glanced over to the large championship trophy and instantly pictured Chris lifting it above his head following their victory. It was an image so clear that you couldn’t think anything else could happen.

Your gaze then shifted to the players who were walking onto the pitch. The Lions came out first as the visiting team. Most looked out at the pitch but Bryce, of course, looked over at you. You didn’t look away though, you didn’t look weak or broken, you looked back with a look of indifference. Something that seemed to bug him. 

The Bears came out next, led by Chris. You looked at him proudly as he did so, smiling when he jogged past and winked at you.

Soon enough the whistle blew and the game kicked off. Both sides came out of the blocks with fire in their veins. You could tell just by the first minute it was going to be a similar match to the last time the two teams played each other. The medical team were gonna be busy.

Within the first 5 minutes, Chris had caught an interception and blazed past the Lions towards the try line. The entire stadium was screaming as he ran at full speed, Lion defenders desperately trying to close the gap but ultimately failing as he dove under the posts.

The entire stadium erupted, the rest of the team running over to congratulate Chris on the try. Chris grinned proudly as he took the praise, one of your team had jogged onto the pitch with the kicking tee and water for him. Chris took the kick quickly, it was an easy one in front of the posts. As the ball sailed over Chris saluted the Lions, more specifically Bryce, before turning back around to jog back to his half to restart.

Chris definitely seemed to have riled the Lions up because they hit back harder. For a while, it became a kicking game with Chris and Bryce kicking the ball for territory back and forth. The game shifted though when the Lion’s fullback caught the ball before kicking it down the pitch towards Chris.

You watched as Chris leapt up into the air. The next few seconds went by like an eternity. Quicker than anyone could react, Bryce was charging down the pitch. You watched in horror as he tackled Chris while he was still in the air. A move that was so illegal the entire crowd erupted in response. You watched as Chris twisted in the air, moving past the horizontal thanks to Bryce tipping his legs upwards, so he landed on his shoulder, his head hitting the ground next with a horrid thunk.

The entire stadium fell silent for a moment as Chris lay motionless on the floor. Chaos then erupted as the crowds shouted for a red card, the rest of the Bears rushing over. Ari grabbed Bryce and ripped him off Chris and moved him away, throwing him down onto the ground which sparked a brawl between the two teams.

The entire time this was happening you were frozen in place, your heart had stopped and all you could hear was ringing in your ears as you stared at Chris motionless on the floor. It took one of your fellow medics shouting at you to finally spark you into action.

You followed the other medics onto the field, your legs feeling like jelly as you ran. Your hands shook as you finally got there and crouched down. Your ears were still ringing so it took you a moment to hear your coworkers telling you to support his neck as they moved him onto his back.

You did as you were told, hands placed on each side of his head. When you got him onto his back you could see his shoulder was either dislocated or his collarbone was broken. He was still unconscious either from being knocked out or blacking out from the pain. 

Your heart broke as you looked down at him. You’d seen him injured before but not as bad as this. Your lip started to wobble and tears collected in the corner of your eyes as you held his head, desperately wanting his eyes to open. 

You gently stroked the side of his head, keeping it still, as you tried to coax him to come around. The other medics worked on his shoulder, checked the rest of his body out for injuries and radioed for a stretcher. 

As they moved his arm to stabilise it, he jerked beneath you. His eyes shot open before contorting in pain, a scream of agony leaving his lips. His body reacted on instinct and tried to move forcing you and the rest of the medics to fight to keep him still so he didn’t make it worse.

“Sh, sh, sh,” you told him unable to stop your tears now, your entire soul hurting as you watched him in pain “Get him painkillers!” You shouted to the other medics before turning your attention back to Chris “You need to stay still sweetheart, you’re gonna be okay, take some deep breaths”

“Babe it hurts” Chris groaned, his chest heaving.

“I know, I know it does sweetheart, we’re gonna give you some painkillers now and get you to the hospital” you promised him.

“Stay” he managed to say his eyes finding yours.

“I will I promise” you swore.

Thankfully the painkillers kicked in pretty quickly allowing you and the rest of the medical team to carry him off the pitch on the stretcher. The entire stadium applauded in respect, Jensen and Ari jogging over to check on Chris as you carried him off. Ari had a split lip from the fight that needed attention but that could wait, Chris needed you now.

As you walked into the tunnel ready to take Chris to the ambulance you were surprised to find Andy waiting.

“Your mic is on” he warned nodding to your radio pack.

You looked down in horror to realise he was right, the mic on your radio to the coaching team had been on for god knows how long. Your dad would have heard everything. You calling Chris sweetheart. Him calling you babe.

You quickly switched it off “Thanks” you muttered “I’ll accompany him to hospital” you said.

“No, I’m going and you’re staying here, your dad wants you on water duty,” Andy told you.

“But-“ you started to argue.

“You don’t want to fight him on this” Andy warned, giving you a look that told you just how pissed off your dad was “Help load him onto the ambulance and then take a few moments to collect yourself” he said, his voice softer as he put a comforting hand on your shoulder.

You nodded, a couple of paramedics had joined to help carry the stretcher allowing 2 of the other medics to return to the game. You carried Chris out of the stadium to the waiting ambulance with the rest of the medics.

“Can I talk to him before you go?” You asked the paramedic.

He nodded his head and stepped aside to let you into the ambulance. You stepped up and moved to Chris, taking his hand gently.

“Hey,” Chris murmured.

“Hey” you said softly “I need to stay here to make sure no one else gets injured, but as soon as I can I’ll come straight to the hospital” you promised him.

You could see the disappointment in his eyes but he nodded “Win the match for me” he muttered.

You let out a watery chuckle “Okay, I’ll see you soon” you said leaning down to kiss his forehead.

You didn’t want to delay his medical treatment anymore so said goodbye before stepping out of the ambulance, letting Andy take your place before watching as it drove away towards Mass Gen. You took a shaky breath trying and failing to get your emotions in check. 

Wrapping your arms around yourself you made your way into the changing room. Without thinking you walked over to Chris’ cubby and sat down, resting your head against the side. You couldn’t stop the tears from falling as you began to sob.

You could hear the crowd cheering in the stands around you. You knew you needed to get back out there and do your job, but couldn’t think about that. All you could think about was that you knew you loved Chris. You loved Chris and you couldn’t be with him when he needed you. You loved Chris and your dad was going to kill you.

The rest of the match felt like an eternity. You hadn’t managed to bring yourself back onto pitch side before halftime so when the team filtered into the changing room you got up from Chris’ cubby and moved to stand in the far corner.

Johnny had been the first player to walk over and make sure you were okay. You gave him a weak smile and nodded your head hugging yourself tightly. Ari then walked over to inform you that he made sure Bryce’s face was the same shade of blue as the Bears jersey. You let out a weak chuckle at that. Jensen was the next player to walk over asking if Chris was gonna be okay.

You nodded and cleared your throat “Yeah, it’s a suspected dislocation or broken collarbone and given how he came round” you said having to take a moment to compose yourself as you recalled it “it looked like he blacked out from the pain rather than being knocked out, no suspected head or neck injury”

You hadn’t realised the team had fallen silent to listen to you until Curtis broke the silence “We’re gonna make them pay” he growled.

Your dad then walked in ready to give the halftime talk. You wished that Johnny, Ari and Jensen hadn’t moved to sit back down in their cubbies. Your wall of protection suddenly gone. Your gaze met your father’s who looked back at you with disappointment before returning his attention to the team.

To your surprise, not only had Bryce been sent off with a red card, but Brad had too for throwing the first punch after Ari threw Bryce to the floor. The Bears had a two-man advantage and had already started to make the Lions hurt. You knew it was about to get more painful now they heard how bad Chris was.

Soon enough half time was over and you followed the medical team back onto the sidelines. Not that you’d be doing much treatment having been relegated to water duty. You watched from the sidelines as the Bears continued to fight, scoring more and more tries. Their tackles landed harder than ever before.

When the clock ticked over the 80th minute and Johnny kicked the ball off the pitch to end the match the entire stadium erupted in cheers. The Boston Bears had won the Championship but you didn’t care. You just wanted to go see Chris.

As soon as you could you left pitch side. You needed to grab your phone and keys from the medical office before making your way to the hospital. Hopefully, before your dad could intercept you. 

You thought you were in the clear but just as you stepped out of the medical office you heard someone clear their throat loudly behind you. You turned around to see your dad standing there with his arms crossed.

“Not going to celebrate the win with the team?” He asked.

“No I need to go, I have something I need to do,” you told him shouldering your bag.

“Not yet, we need to talk first in my office” he said leaving no room for arguments so you nodded your head and followed him to his office.

Once inside your dad moved to lean against his desk, arms still crossed as he looked down at the floor. You stood a couple of feet away.

“What happened out there? I’ve seen you deal with a snapped leg which was facing the wrong way better than that” he asked.

You sighed and shrugged your shoulders “Chris means a lot to me, I was just shocked at how bad it looked when he got tackled, he was screaming in pain, you would have heard it over the radio” you said honestly.

“I did, and it’s not just that he means a lot to you is it? You’re dating him.” Your dad hummed.

“Yes, I am” you admitted, knowing there was no point in denying it now.

Your dad sighed and shook his head “How could you be so stupid? After everything that happened to you in LA, how could date another rugby player after that? Especially after I made it clear to them all that you were off limits?” He demanded.

“We got together before you told the players that” you admitted quietly.

Your dad scoffed quietly and shook his head “Regardless you should know better”

“Maybe, but Chris is different! He’s been there for me!” You argued, your dad shook his head in disbelief “he did! That fight he started in LA was because of me! He heard Bryce talking shit and goaded him into a fight”

Your dad blinked a couple of times in surprise “he knows?”

You nodded “he didn’t at the time but I have told him, told him everything, even the things I couldn’t tell you and he didn’t run away or confirm my fears, he held me tight and made sure I was okay while I had a panic attack” you stated.

“I didn’t know you’ve been having panic attacks” he said his brows furrowed in concern.

“I didn’t know they were panic attacks until that night” you admitted “but the point is Chris isn’t like Bryce, he’s different in every way and… I couldn’t help falling in love with him”

Silence fell in the room at your admission. Your dad looked down as he nodded his head. 

“Okay” he started “now I say this not because I want to hurt you, but because I want to protect you and you need to end this before he hurts you, because he will”

You felt like you had been punched in the gut “dad…”

“I’m sorry Y/N but it’s true” he said with a sad sigh.

“No, it can’t be,” you said shaking your head, your voice breaking, “Tommi said she saw what looked like love between us”

“When did Tommi see you two together?” He asked.

“In LA me, her, Chris and Ari had lunch together in the hotel bar” you answered.

“Right” he nodded “I can understand why you’d want to believe her but she doesn’t know Chris like I do, I’ve coached him for the past 9 years, since he was 19” your dad sighed “he’s not a player like Storm but he’s not someone I would trust with you”

You stumbled back hearing that “You don’t think he loves me back?” You whispered.

“I- no I don’t and I’m sorry, I just want to protect you” he sighed.

You nodded “You think I should end it?” You muttered sadly.

“We both know I can’t make you, but yes I think you should” he admitted.

You sniffled and wiped away the stray tears “Okay” you muttered.

“I’m sorry” your dad sighed as he walked over to wrap his arms around you “I know it doesn’t feel like it right now but this is the right decision”

“Can I still go see him in hospital? I promised him that I would and I don’t want to break that promise” you asked.

Your dad sighed before nodding “Yes but I’ll drive because you’re in no state”

“Thank you” you muttered.

A short while later you were walking through the corridors of Mass Gen, a nurse directing you and your dad to Chris’ room. Updating both of you as she did so.

“It was both a dislocation and a broken collarbone so it’s no surprise he blacked out, thankfully it wasn’t a compound break and didn’t require surgery. He’s not concussed either which is good so we’ve been able to give him painkillers that will make him drowsy” the nurse told you.

“Do you think he’ll be able to play again?” Your dad asked.

“We’re hopeful, with good physio he should be on top form again” The nurse nodded.

“Good,” you said knowing Chris would be devastated if it was a career-ending injury.

“He’s gonna be a little out of it because of the pain meds but he’s not in pain and should be fine as long as he doesn’t jostle his shoulder” the nurse said as you reached his room.

“Thank you,” you said before quietly opening the door to his room. 

Chris was fast asleep, his arm in a sling. His mom sat by his bed, she smiled when she saw the both of you walk in.

“Coach you didn’t need to come” she said quietly, getting up to shake his hand.

“I couldn’t not check in with my star captain,” your dad said with a small smile.

“And you must be Y/N,” she said turning to you “Chris has said so much about you”

Your eyebrows rose in surprise “he has?” You asked in surprise.

“Yes! He’s been asking for you since he got here, didn’t care about the game” Lisa chuckled in disbelief.

“Wow,” you muttered in disbelief, glancing over at your dad. What you needed to do was going to be much harder now.

At that exact moment, Chris began to stir, his mom stepped out of the way gesturing for you to go to him. You walked to his side, resting a hand carefully on his chest.

“Chris,” you said softly.

He blinked a couple of times, clearly still a bit loopy as he couldn’t keep his eyes open or his head still.

“Hey sweetheart, how you feeling?” You asked as you brushed some hair out of his face.

Chris frowned and pushed your hand away “Sorry” he slurred “I’m sure you’re lovely but I’m taken” 

“What?” You asked confused.

“Her name is Y/N and she’s amazing and so strong as amazing and I love her so I’m sorry but not gonna happen” he slurred shaking his head.

You couldn’t help but chuckle, he didn’t recognise you in his drugged-out haze. You heard Lisa chuckle behind you, muttering how cute it was.

“Chris, sweetheart it’s me, it’s Y/N,” you told him softly.

Chris squinted at you, a look of deep concentration on his face before his face lit up and he gasped “Babe! You’re here! Why did you take you so long!” He complained.

“I’m sorry I came as fast as I could” you apologised smiling down at him “and I love you”

Chris gave you a lopsided grin as he reached out to take your hand and kiss your knuckles “I love you too” he said making you chuckle, clearly, he didn’t realise he had already admitted that to you “Did you win the match for me?”

You nodded “Absolutely destroyed the Lions, Ari made sure Bryce’s face was black and blue before he got his red card for the tackle,” you told him. 

“Good he deserves it, deserves to never play again” Chris said “shame I couldn’t lift the trophy but you’re more important to me”

“I’m glad to hear it, and you’ll have your chance to lift it” you promised him.

“What about your dad? He’s not gonna kill me is he?” Chris asked his eyes going droopy again.

“I won’t let him, now get some rest,” you said softly.

Chris didn’t protest, he nodded his head and rested it back against his pillow. It didn’t take long for him to fall back asleep, softly snoring.

Once you were sure he was fast asleep you turned back around to face your dad. He had an unreadable look on his face, you were about to say something but he turned and left the room.

You quickly followed after him catching up with him in the hallway “Dad!” You called out making him stop and turn around to face you “You can’t seriously expect me to call it off after that”

Your dad sighed and shook his head “No I can’t”

“Then what’s wrong? Are you angry with me?” You demanded.

Your dad sighed and opened his mouth before shutting it again “I- I just, I need some time” he said holding up his hand.

“Dad” you sighed.

“Stop, I’ll come to you when-“ he didn’t finish his sentence. He just turned and walked away, fists clenched down by his sides.

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[linos-luna]

𝐇𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐨!

𝐼 𝑗𝑢𝑠𝑡 𝑤𝑎𝑛𝑡𝑒𝑑 𝑡𝑜 𝑎𝑠𝑘, 𝑖𝑓 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑐𝑎𝑛 𝑤𝑟𝑖𝑡𝑒 𝑎 𝑓𝑎𝑛𝑓𝑖𝑐 𝑜𝑓 𝑺𝒐𝒐𝒃𝒊𝒏 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝒐𝒃𝒔𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒊𝒐𝒏 𝒊𝒔𝒔𝒖𝒆𝒔, 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑠𝑜 𝑜𝑛. 𝐼 𝑐𝑎𝑛'𝑡 𝑓𝑖𝑛𝑑 𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑦 𝑐𝑎𝑡𝑐ℎ𝑒𝑠 𝑚𝑦 𝑎𝑡𝑡𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛, 𝑠𝑜 𝑠𝑖𝑛𝑐𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢'𝑟𝑒 𝑚𝑦 𝑓𝑎𝑣𝑜𝑢𝑟𝑖𝑡𝑒 𝑓𝑎𝑛𝑓𝑖𝑐 𝑤𝑟𝑖𝑡𝑒𝑟, 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑚𝑎𝑘𝑒 𝑜𝑛𝑒? 𝑃𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑒 𝐼 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑦 𝑙𝑜𝑣𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑘 𝑖𝑡'𝑠 𝑎𝑚𝑎𝑧𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑠𝑜 𝑐𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑣𝑒.

𝐼 ℎ𝑜𝑝𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑚𝑎𝑘𝑒 𝑖𝑡.

𝐾𝑖𝑠𝑠𝑒𝑠 𝑎𝑛𝑑 ℎ𝑢𝑔𝑠 𝑓𝑟𝑜𝑚 𝑃𝑜𝑟𝑡𝑢𝑔𝑎𝑙. 💚💛❤

(I can't believe that I'm writing this like an e-mail Haha)

Lol. It’s cute actually ☺️

————————————————————————

Your Bunny 🔪

Yandere!Soobin x Fem!Reader

Warnings: obsession, Yandere. Stalking

————————————————————————

You kept the window open at night. A small breeze would come in, a great feeling for summer nights. You lay peacefully on your back, the covers not even over you as you slept. Actually, there was still some eyeliner and mascara on you as well. You unexpectedly fell asleep while reading.

As you slept, you dreamed of meeting up with your boyfriend tomorrow. You loved him, really, but he could be a bit much at times. You’ve been debating whether or not to break up with him for a while now and that conflict made it to your dreams.

What you didn’t know was that he was here. Soobin took advantage of the open window and climbed in with ease. He sat next to you and stroked your hair. Soobin loved watching you sleep.

“We’re done……. No soobin…” you muttered in your sleep while shaking your head.

Your boyfriend raised a brow as he heard you.

“Stop… it’s… over…”

Soobin couldn’t help himself. Were you planning to break up with him?! Is that what the meeting was about for tomorrow??

“You’re breaking up with me?!!” He yelled suddenly, shaking you awake. You shrieked when seeing him. You quickly sat up while in a panic. Soobin was holding onto you by your shoulders.

“Soobin, what are you doing here?!” You yelled.

“You wanna break up with me?!” He completely ignored your question and kept shaking you. “How could you?! You can’t break up with me!! You can’t!”

“Baby—”

“I can’t live without you, noona!” He interrupted.

“Soobin… how long have you been watching me sleep?” You were asking about this night specifically but his answer scared you even more.

“Every night, noona.” He responded, “you’re just so pretty when you sleep.”

“Soobin!”

“I can’t help it!” He pouted. “I need to see you!”

“You see me almost every day!” You sighed while getting up. “Please leave… we’ll talk tomorrow…”

“No!” He got up and ran to you. “You’re gonna break up with me!”

“Baby—”

“You can’t do that!” He interrupted while grabbing your arm.

“Soobin… you—”

“Please noona! Don’t leave me!” He said with some tears rolling down his cheeks. “I’m your bunny! I can’t live without you!”

You couldn’t help feeling bad for him. Yeah he was obsessive but he was also very loving. He treated you like a queen. You love him. But how much more could you handle?

“Ok… I’m not leaving you…” you sighed. “But can you please not watch me at night? It’s creepy.”

“Yeah ok! Anything you want!” He replied quickly while grabbing your hand.

“Alright. Go home baby… I’ll see you tomorrow okay?”

“Can I sleep here?” He asks with a pout.

“No, baby… I need some space to think right now.”

“What kind of space?!” He blurted out. “Why would you need space from me??”

You didn’t know what to say at this point and you laid down, patting the spot next to you on the bed.

Soobin gleefully laid next to you and kissed your cheek. He put his arms around you and held you tight.

“Soobin… it’s hot…”

“I thought I was your bunny!” He yelled.

“Yes… bunny! But it’s hot!”

“Nice try, noona. You’re not getting away that fast.” He giggled while hugging you tighter.

He must’ve been really tired because he fell asleep fairly quick. Although he still held on tight. It was hot but he was too strong for you to struggle. There was nothing you could really do…

[obxsummer]

I Fall Apart // Ghost of You

navigation -- series masterlist

--

summary: jj gets to mack on his girl, sarah's got topper whipped, john b and his dad are MIA, and y/n's reminded just how reckless her boyfriend can be

warnings: s3 spoilers, accidents, panic attacks, shitty parenting as per usual

--

The first thing you did was shove JJ into the shower. The next was handling getting the electricity back on since clearly your father wasn’t concerned with doing that. You were fine with not tagging along with their treasure hunting, but you were worried about your brother. He loved your dad, adored him for so much of his life, and it concerned you that he wouldn’t see what a pawn he was in your dad’s plans. 

You had told JJ as much as you sat in the bathroom on the floor while he showered. You told him about Singh’s place, about Rafe, and how your dad sent you guys on a goose chase for a rock. JJ couldn’t say he was surprised, about any of it, but he was just glad to be back with you. 

Soon enough, Sarah and Kie were on your doorstep, the four of you crowding out by the dock to get the last of the warm sun on you before turning in for the night. 

“I went back to grab clothes and a phone, and you’re not gonna believe this,” Sarah started as she sat down next to you. “Rafe is back. I saw him at the house. I don’t think he saw me, but I think the cross is coming back to Wilmington tomorrow night.”

You sat up from where you were leaning against JJ’s chest to face her. “What?”

“Does Pope know?” Kie asked.

Sarah shook her head. “No, I was gonna tell him when I found you guys.”

“He can’t, he’s on lockdown.” You expected everyone to take some time away, and connect with their families before coming back to figure out the next steps. 

Sarah sighed, “Okay, well. Kie and I can hit up Pope and you guys tell John B when you see him?”

“Yeah, yeah. Of course.” You gave them both a small smile as they said their goodbyes and walked back up the dock. 

You and JJ sat silently, taking in the warmth on your skin before the sun disappeared for the night. You really wished your brother would come home or at least check in to make sure he was okay. Sarah had found a spare iPhone charger to give you for the phone you guys had taken from Barbados. You made sure any tracking services were off so Singh couldn’t try and chase you down. 

“Well if the cross is coming back, it’s still on the field. We’re still in this, we can come in and swoop. We gotta get everybody together and come up with a plan,” JJ rattled off as his fingers tapped excitedly against your thighs. 

You took a deep breath and grabbed JJ’s hands to hold in your own. You were thankful for the last chance opportunity to get the cross back, but you didn’t want to risk running into Rafe or getting your friends into the line of trouble again. 

“Talk to me,” JJ held out the word, swinging your hands back and forth before wrapping around your waist tightly to hold you. “C’mon.”

A small smile formed on your face, so grateful for a boy who could read you so easily, who could love you so easily. You laughed as he left wet kisses against your shoulders into the curve of your neck to get you to talk. “Okay, okay.” He pressed one more to your temple for good measure. “I’m just worried about John B. That’s all.”

“He’s with your dad, Y/N. I’m sure he’s perfectly fine.”

You kept your grip on JJ’s hand and brought it up to your lips to kiss the back of it. “That’s exactly why I’m worried about him. My dad is way too deep in this treasure hunt to realize he’s putting his own kids at risk, and John B will just let him because he doesn’t want to disappoint him.”

“He didn’t seem too upset when you said you didn’t wanna go,” JJ tried to reason.

You shook your head. “That’s because he doesn’t have any disappointment left when it comes to me. I know he doesn’t care if I’m there or not. That’s how it’s always been. Him and John B against the world. I was just the backup piece.” You took a deep, shaky breath. “Your dad takes the prize for Shittiest Dad but I think mine might be a close second.”

JJ laughed at the idea. “Well, Ward Cameron might take second but I get what you mean. And it may be hard, but I don’t want you to think what your dad says represents the truth about you. You’re my number one, no matter what.”

You mumbled a small thank you, adjusting further into his grip as if there was any room to. God knows what you’d do without JJ.

"We have the whole house to ourselves?"

"Jesus Christ, JJ!"

--

Your group met back up the next afternoon to figure out what the plan was to get the cross back. You still hadn’t heard anything from John B, Sarah claiming the same. The six of you crowded around a small table with the sun beating down on you. The ferry ride to Wilmington wouldn’t take too long so you could bear the heat for the time being.

“Honestly, the hardest part is gonna be security, alright?” JJ was running everyone through the steps of what would need to go down. “So most of the guys are gonna be at the rail yard.”

“Right, so we’re going to need to find someplace and guard it, maybe a little further down the line, like a whistle-stop or something,” Pope theorized.

“You guys are getting ahead of yourselves per usual,” Cleo interrupted, “We don’t have a way to transport the cross. What did you think? On JJ’s motorcycle?”

Your boyfriend grunted behind you and pulled his hat off. “That’s not my fault.”

“Okay, so other options-”

“Oh, my God.” You all stopped conversing at Sarah’s sudden outburst, watching as she sat up stiffly next to you. You moved instantly, Kie and Pope doing the same to see where her gaze had been to come up with Topper Thornton.

“Why…is he everywhere?” Kiara asked as she turned back around. 

Pope, however, was on a different thought process. “Perfect. Hey, Jayj. I bet you Topper has a way to transport the cross.”

Your boyfriend shrugged at the suspicion. “Actually, Pope’s right. He does have a rig.”

“No.” Sarah instantly declined. 

“Yes,” JJ clapped right back.

“No. Absolutely not.”

“Oh, come on,” JJ pestered, “Sarah, you already got him whipped anyway, alright? So, why don’t you just take one for the team?”

The blonde was not happy with the suggestion. “What would John B say?”

You tilted your head in consideration. “Eh, I think John B would completely understand. It is about the treasure.” You caught her defeated look and leaned over to place your hand on hers. “If you really don’t want to, it’s okay. You don’t have to. But, I think if you just talk to him, he may be willing.”

Sarah let out a deep breath before mumbling an agreement and getting to her feet. The five of you watched carefully, moving out of view so Topper couldn’t see you directly. You hated the idea of Sarah feeling uncomfortable with this but you knew she could handle it. After a few moments of back and forth, she suddenly gave Topper a big hug which signaled an agreement in your eyes. Your friends silently cheered around you, giving her a thumbs up when she made eye contact. 

Maybe y’all had a chance at this after all.

--

It was dark out by the time you guys hit the train yard, managing to situate yourself on top of one of the cars so you could survey everything around you.

“Well, there’s like a thousand trains here.”

“We know it’s car 750X on the track to Raleigh, so now we just gotta find it.”

You scanned the area in front of you. “Well, news flash, guys. We’re not getting out of here unnoticed with a giant cross.”

“We don’t have to,” Pope said, “We can nab it somewhere further in the country. Just gotta figure out how to stop the train.”

“Leave that to me,” JJ interrupted everyone’s thought process. You stared at him, waiting for further explanation. “I got an uncle up in New Bern, right? When he got tipsy, he’d just throw an old chain across the tracks for shits and giggles. And that old little chain would stop all the train traffic in Coastal Carolina.”

Kie looked at him incredulously. “A chain?”

“He’s actually right,” Pope confirmed, “There’s a low voltage current that runs across all rail tracks. You throw a chain on it, you close that circuit. It would read as another train. Crossing lights come down. Science is actually pretty sound.”

JJ clapped his hands together and gave you a small nudge. “Science, babe. I knew my science.”

“Well, babe, we don’t have a chain,” You reminded him. 

“No, but I bet Topper’s dad has jumper cables in the truck,” Sarah pointed out, “Would that work?”

Pope nodded as Topper started yelling from behind your group, remaining on the ground. “What’s going on? Are we doing this or not?”

“Alright, you all wait here. Me and Pope will go look for it and send a signal once we find it,” Cleo said.

Sarah glanced between the six of you with a smile on her face. “Do we actually have a plan right now?”

“Think we do.”

“For once in our lives.”

“Let’s not jinx it, come on.”

Pope and Cleo began to climb down off the train car to search further for the specific area you’d need. You, Kie, JJ, and Sarah remained in place and decided to sit until something came up. After a moment, you laid back against the cool material of the container you were on, grateful for the temperature. 

“Has anyone heard from John B?” Kiara asked after a moment of waiting. 

You groaned and rubbed your hands over your face before letting them flop by your sides. “Nope. Hasta la vista, JB.”

“He left a note at the Chateau that he was going with Big John, but hasn’t come back since,” JJ explained further as he leaned back against his hands. “I’m sure they’re fine wherever they’re at.”

Silence took over, all of you waiting eagerly for a sign from Cleo and Pope. Eventually, a flashlight hit your vision, all of you popping up to see Pope on the ladder, calling you over. 

“That’s it!” JJ reached out a hand to pull you up just as a train horn blared.

“What’s happening?” Kiara asked as if you guys weren’t surrounded by trains that could take off at any moment.

You watched as Pope got shifted around before you realized it was the train you needed taking off. “Shit, it’s moving. We gotta go.”

The four of you clambered down the ladder as fast as possible and over to Topper’s truck. He looked extremely unamused by being dragged into this. 

“Oh, hey Sarah.”

“Do you have jumper cables in there?” Sarah ignored his sarcasm and got straight to the point. 

“Here I am involved in illegal activities-”

“Not that illegal.

“I’m not even close to being okay with this.”

Sarah cut him off by slamming the door shut. She had a set of cables in her hand and quickly handed them off to you. “Topper, if you don’t wanna go, it’s fine. We’ll take the truck.”

“Hey, I just wanna make sure everyone here is okay with ending up in federal prison,” Topper directed towards all of you. 

JJ bit back a laugh and swung his leg over the seat of his bike, reaching his hand out to help you do the same. “Uh, if it gets to that, yeah. I’ll do it for Pope.” You gave him a soft smile and wrapped your arms around his torso, making sure the jumper cables weren’t at risk of falling.

You guys didn’t waste a second after that, JJ taking the lead while Kie, Sarah, and Topper followed in the truck. Usually, you weren’t a huge fan of JJ and the bike, but you’d grown used to it in the time you’d been together. Granted, he drove way safer with you on the back than when he was by himself, but still.

You winced as he took a corner a little too sharp, your grip tightening out of fear of falling. You didn’t go much further before JJ pulled off into a grassy patch next to the road that intersected with the tracks.

“This should be far enough.” You made it a whopping three steps before JJ tripped over nothing into the dirt below. He groaned and got back to his feet, sparing the glance to see you laughing at him. “I meant for that.”

You hummed, “Sure you did, babe. Let’s go.”

The plan was simple - use the jumper cables to reverse the charge so the train would have to stop, hopefully leaving enough time for you guys to unload the cross and get out of here. JJ connected one of the cables to the crossing lights before placing the other two on the tracks. 

“Okay, now all you have to do is change the current,” He scrambled around to get everything in the right order. He was moving quickly, his brain processing faster than he thought it ever could

You looked behind you, the horn of the train getting louder by the second which didn’t help your nerves. “Please don’t get electrocuted.”

“Yeah, no promises with that.” He placed the red cable on first before clamping the black one next. The two of you looked up at the signal, anticipating the lights to change to red, but they continued to flicker green. 

“Why isn’t it changing?”

“That’s literally what he would do. He would do it, and-and then it would change to red. Oh my god.” JJ started pacing in frustration as the train continued to near. “Think think think. Okay, what if I blockaded the track?”

“Jayj, no.” You crouched down by the cables, giving him a look. “How about moving the cable because the train touches both sides of the track, hmm?” You switched the red cable over to the other side before standing up. JJ’s fingers curled around your wrist in anticipation as you stared up at the crossing lights. They blinked green for another few seconds before switching to a solid red. 

The two of you cheered at the color change, JJ reaching for a high five before pulling you into him for a hug. “You’re a genius.”

“Nope, it’s all you.” You kissed his cheek quickly before grabbing his hand and tugging for the two of you to duck by some nearby trees. “We gotta hide.”

It didn’t take long for the train’s brakes to kick in and start slowing down. JJ let out a small ‘yay’ once it finally stopped in front of you, hopefully giving Cleo and Pope a chance to climb off. The excitement was short-lived, however, when a service truck pulled up next to you on the main road.

“Shit, back up, back up.” JJ tugged the back of your shirt, moving the two of you further into the tree line so you weren’t in view. “This was not part of the plan!”

Two workers climbed out of the truck and started surveying the area for the possible cause. “What is this bullshit?” It didn’t take long for them to find the jumper cables attached to the tracks, both you and JJ mumbling curses when they did. They were quick to remove the cables so the crossing lights turned green.

“You’re all set over here. Some asshole put jumper cables on the tracks.”

You turned to JJ as the workers climbed back in the truck, fearful that they wouldn’t have made it. “You think that gave them enough time?” The answer to your question came in the form of the train honking that it would start moving again. “We gotta go get them.”

“There goes the plan, come on!” JJ offered his hand to get you off the ground, the two of you sprinting back to his bike. The engine kicked to life beneath you just as a familiar pickup truck came flying around the corner with a large crate in the back. “That’s Top. And that’s the cross. Get on!”

You didn’t hesitate to climb behind him, arms looped around his waist tightly before he took off behind your friends. The sound of police sirens followed not too long after, the blue lights eventually finding you before you would’ve liked.

“J!” You placed your forehead between his shoulder blades, suddenly terrified about what would come next. He was moving a little too fast for your liking, but you could tell he was trying to keep up with Topper.

“I know, I know!”

The bike moved faster beneath you, JJ guiding it to ride alongside Topper’s truck. You glanced over to see Cleo and Pope in the bed of the truck, staring right back at you. “What the hell are you doing?” Pope yelled at your boyfriend.

“Get ready to jump,” JJ yelled back at you, his eyes not leaving the road. “Top, keep going straight!”

“What?” You gaped at him, not that he could see you. Pope let out an expression of equal shock, the two of you in disbelief that JJ would actually suggest this. “Are you insane?”

“Probably,” Your boyfriend replied back, fully serious about what he was telling you to do. “Get ready to jump!”

Pope reached out towards you, Cleo right behind him as they leaned by the side of the truck bed. “Come on, come on. I’ve got you!”

You took a deep breath, slowly letting go of JJ’s waist to grab Pope’s outstretched hand. You did your best to keep JJ balanced while stepping off, your hand lingering on his shoulder until you rolled on top of the wooden crate the cross was in. 

“JJ!” You screamed the second you got adjusted and watched him slow down to place himself between the truck and the oncoming cop car.

Cleo’s hand guided you into the gap between the crate and the back of Topper’s truck, all of them asking if you were okay. You barely answered, eyes trained on JJ’s form as he slammed on the brakes, using his momentum to pop a wheelie and change directions. 

“What’s he gonna do?” Cleo looked at you as if you had the answer.

“I don’t know,” You choked out, “I don’t think he knows either.”

JJ moved forward slightly to pick something off the ground before gunning it full speed towards the cruiser. 

“Topper!” You yelled as you watched JJ slam the rock into the cop’s windshield. The police didn’t hesitate to yank the car around to follow him instead. “We have to go back!”

“Stop the truck!” Pope and Cleo copied your idea, yelling into the small window that accessed the main cabin. You watched until you lost sight of JJ to the darkness of the night. Topper slowed down a second later. The pit in your stomach grew as he turned the truck around, racing back in the direction JJ was going in. 

“Turn left!” Pope called out as a service road came up.

You could vaguely hear Sarah and Topper arguing before he listened to the change of direction. Your eyes caught sight of JJ on the road running parallel, the cops directly behind him. Your chest was aching as you watched, unable to look away no matter how much you wanted to. 

Pope called out more directions for Topper, the noises turning blurry around you. Cleo’s hands latched on your shoulders, pulling you into her so you had someone to lean onto. You struggled to get air in your lungs with every inch of your body in panic mode. 

You watched carefully as JJ pulled onto the overpass you were about to go under. There was a bright flash of light and the sound of a car horn before a loud screeching noise took over your senses. You could feel the truck slide beneath you, suddenly horizontal on the road.

You moved before your brain even had a chance to process what happened. “Pope, go!” Legs aching as you jumped from the tailgate, the first thing you noticed was JJ’s bike in a tangled mess just inches away from where Topper’s truck had stopped. 

“JJ!” Your throat burned from the force of your scream as you tried to find any sign of him. There was busted concrete under your feet, but nothing that indicated he was even down here. “JJ, answer me! Where is he?”

Your friends descended into panic behind you, yelling out for your boyfriend. Sarah’s arms caught you the second you wavered, both of you hitting the ground harshly. You fought to get air into your lungs as you continued to look for JJ. 

“Maybe he’s up on the bridge?”

“No, no, no,” You gasped for air, Sarah’s hands forcing you to put your head between your legs in an attempt to avoid you passing out. Tears burned in your eyes as you realized that was very much a crash he wouldn’t survive. “Fuck.”

The world blurred for a moment, your body numb as you tried to breathe through the panic attack. It was always so much worse when it involved JJ and any harm coming to him. You shifted, legs digging into the concrete below you as Sarah rubbed your back and tried to talk you through it.

“I wish I could say I did that on purpose, but that was the gnarliest powerslide I’ve ever done.”

The second you registered the voice behind you, air flooded your lungs as you coughed aggressively. Your head snapped up, Sarah moving to get on her feet as you turned, not trusting yourself to stand yet. God damn this boy for being so reckless.

Pope reacted first and slammed into JJ forcefully, “You’re alive!”

“Shit, that was gnarly!” Topper himself was even surprised at the sight he witnessed.

“That was trucking, dude,” JJ attempted to compliment the Kook back before he was getting attacked by Sarah Cameron’s hands against his chest. “Oh, Jesus. Oh, God.” She didn’t hesitate to bring him into a bone-crushing hug, chastising him for being so dangerous. 

You stared up at your boyfriend, unable to move as you watched your friends rejoice at his presence. Moments like this were Earth-shattering to you and took a while to get through. You couldn’t brush off near-death experiences like you used to. 

“As nice as these pleasantries are, we really need to move.”

Sarah reached over to you, hands pulling you off the ground to a shaky stance. JJ was there in a second, his hands replacing your best friend’s as he grasped your elbows to keep you steady. You stared right into his eyes, knowing your own were teary. You could’ve slapped him. “Don’t… don’t you ever do that again. You hear me?”

JJ pulled his lips in tightly and gave you a nod, knowing he had no room to argue. You collided with his chest a second later, a heavy sob finally making its way out as you clung to him. JJ let out a sigh, the adrenaline slowly seeping from his body as he held you against him. 

“Hey! Hey, you kids, don’t move!”

JJ was grabbing your hand the split second a flashlight ran across the two of you, practically sprinting to the truck. He lifted you into the back seat next to Kiara before climbing into the bed of the truck with Pope, telling Topper to go. 

You tucked your legs up onto the seat to curl into a ball, knowing the pressure was the only way to get your racing heart to calm down. Usually, this is where JJ would happily hug you senselessly, but you didn’t have time to resort to that. 

“Hey, hey. You okay?” Kiara’s hand was cold on your leg, grounding. 

You let a deep breath out between your lips, head leaning against the headrest as you forced a nod. “Yeah. Just gotta…gotta breathe through it.”

Sometimes it felt so silly to deal with your anxiety like this, like you were looking for constant attention and reassurance. Not that you could help it, but you wish it didn’t have to be this way. You wish losing your friends wasn’t such a big fear of yours, wasn’t a possible reality. 

You filtered out the yelling that started between your friends and Topper. There was no doubt the cops were set to catch up to you. You didn’t really care how fast Topper was driving the truck, but evidently, everyone surrounding you did. 

Suddenly, the vehicle hit a large bump in the road causing the wooden crate to fly from the back of the truck. Topper screeched to a stop just before everyone flew out of their various positions to check on it. 

You opened your own door to meet them on the road as Pope tossed the top off to check on the cross. To your luck, it was filled with multiple tires full of concrete. 

“What the hell?”

“It’s fake.”

Pope leaned down to inspect it. “It’s all freaking fake.”

“Pope, I’m so sorry,” Sarah apologized solemnly. 

You sighed, knowing all of your efforts were in vain for the Heyward’s heirloom. The sound of police sirens started getting louder, which mean you needed to get back on the move. 

“Y’all hear that? Okay, I can’t be here. My grandfather’s a judge.”

“Dog, would you relax?” JJ tried to get Topper to chill out. “They’re not gonna think some dude in flip-flops is part of a robbery.”

You took one last look, reassuring Pope that it would be okay before climbing back into Topper’s truck to get the hell out of there and go home.

--

You were exhausted by the time you guys got off the ferry. The group had practically pulled an all-nighter with the nonstop running and you were fully prepared to sleep the day away. Topper was kind enough to drop you all off at the Chateau, an awkward conversation forming between him and Sarah before you caught sight of the Twinkie in the yard. 

“John B!” You took off running as your brother walked out of the screen door with a beer in hand. He very clearly didn’t expect you to come at him full speed and the drink almost slipped from his hands when you ran into him. “You’re okay.”

He stayed silent but returned the hug, making you look up at him. It was obvious to anyone that he looked exhausted. He shook his head and let you go. “You were right.”

You didn’t dare ask him to explain at the moment, not that it would’ve been possible since your father stepped out of the Chateau a second later. Your friends lost their shit, Pope and Kiara letting out bursts of excitement to see him. JJ even embraced him a second time, jumping on his back just like he would do when you guys were kids. 

Everyone gave a quick recap of your time in Wilmington before John B explained the treasure hunt he went on with your dad to Charleston. “Yeah, yeah. So, we um, we went to the archives in Charleston, and, uh, it was a dead end. A dry hole. So.”

The tone of his voice was enough to tell you he was lying. You were sure your friends could pick up on it too, all of you knowing each other well enough to tell easily. Pope counted on his fingers. “So that’s the gold, the cross, and now El Dorado. We’re three for three, guys.”

You watched your dad give a subtle nod to your brother, Sarah catching it too as she glanced at him before her eyes moved to you. Why John B was lying to all of you, you had no idea. There was no doubt in your mind that it was your dad’s bidding, though.

Pope threw his beer can wildly, letting out a sarcastic cheer. “The streak continues. That’s great.”

Kie and Cleo were quick to follow him away from the house, calling out goodbyes as they passed. JJ was the next to get on his feet. “I’m going fishing. Thanks for the beer.”

You moved with him to stop him short of leaving. It would be a lie if you said you were comfortable with him walking away from you, especially with how the last few hours had been in terms of safety. “J, you sure you’re okay?”

You could tell he was forcing the smile on his face as he nodded. “I’m good, babe. Promise. Just wanna go clear my head for a few.”

“I’ll be here, okay? Come get me,” You didn’t specify for what, leaving the reason in the air. If he needed you, you’d be there, no matter what. JJ nodded and gave you a soft kiss before turning on his heels and walking away from you. “I love you!”

He paused in his exit to look back at you. “I love you more.” 

JJ was one of those people who just needed space to process. You totally understood, giving it to him when he asked, but it always made you iffy that he was lying to himself. He shouldered a lot of your burden because you were comfortable sharing that with him. He wasn’t like that and dealt with it on his own. You always reminded him you would be happy to listen to anything he said, so the offer was always there.

Turning around, you could tell Sarah had the same hints about something being off based on the way she was speaking to John B. You let out a sigh and made your way inside to hopefully escape all the tension lingering. The screen door slammed a moment after you were inside. You turned to see your brother following you, his jaw clenched, whole body tense.

“Hey,” You whispered in case he didn’t want to talk about it. John B met you in the kitchen, leaning against the counter opposite you. “I’d ask if you’re okay, but I think I know the answer.”

“Um, we’re leaving, again.” You weren’t surprised by his words and merely nodded in return. What you didn’t expect was for your brother to step closer with shiny eyes full of tears. “What you heard out there, it was all a lie. We found the other piece to the idol. And-and Dad gave Limbrey some fake shroud so she could walk again, and I cannot keep lying to them, Y/N!” His voice cracked on your name. There was no point in saying that you saw this coming from a million miles away.

“It’s okay, JB.” You moved forward to pull him into a hug as he let out a few deep breaths. “Don’t worry about us. We’ll figure everything out. Just, be careful, okay?”

John B was quick to agree, recomposing himself before giving you a goodbye and leaving to get in the Twinkie. You were left with the mess on your hands, stuck in the middle of your brother and your friends, just hoping things could hold on a little longer until you could find a way to fix everything.

--

You kept to yourself the rest of the day, taking the time to catch up on some much-needed rest and attempting to clean up the house to the best of your ability. You knew at some point shit would hit the fan again so you didn’t mind the downtime on your hands. This felt normal to you - to be home by yourself with everyone out on their own adventures. This was how everything was before your dad went missing, before you were thrown headfirst into taking care of yourself and your brother. 

Eventually, the silence got to be too much and you found yourself on the path to JJ’s house in hopes to find him there. Evidently, your brother had the same idea. The Twinkie was already in sight as you walked through the grass to where you caught a view of your brother and JJ. Your boyfriend was sitting on the rotting wooden steps that led up to the patio, John B standing near the driver’s door of the van.

They both looked at you once you were close enough that they could hear your footsteps. JJ let out a sigh and ran his fingers through his hair. He looked back at John B. “Does she know?”

You seemed to take everything in at that moment. Your dad was nowhere to be found and if you had a say, John B looked a little worse for wear. JJ patted the spot next to him so your brother would sit and hesitantly, John B did as he asked. You stood a few feet away from them as your boyfriend rubbed his face stressfully. 

“I don’t know what to do, JJ.” John B’s voice was almost inaudible. “How the hell do we get to South America?”

“No clue…but, we’re gonna figure it out. We always do.” You watched the two of them lean on each other, JJ’s arm wrapping around your brother’s shoulder. This was the John B and JJ you’d grown up with; two dumbasses where nothing mattered at the end of the day so long as they had each other. Their friendship had been poked, prodded, and pulled at over these past few months but here they were, proving all your doubts wrong. 

“So. Is someone gonna tell me what the hell is going on or am I just gonna have to figure it out for myself?”

--

navigation -- series masterlist

tags: @strawberryfolks @jinxfirebolt18902 @lnnlove@itsmytimetoodream @dazzlingnights @ifilwtmfc @itsmytimetoodream @multiifandomhoe @tenaciousperfectionunknown

[gaystayzennie]

I Did Everything I Was Supposed To Do (pt.1)

Haechan x male reader

Summary: Finals week turns out to be the final breaking point for y/n, but luckily Haechan is around right when you need him

Warnings: fluff, some angst: homophobia, allusions to panic disorder, stress

“Fuck. I can’t believe I forgot about the final on Monday. Fuck fuck fuck” Y/n cursed under his breath as he walked as fast as he could toward the entrance to his boyfriend’s place. Y/n had a million things to do the next few days already, and now he had a final to cram for on top of it all. “One thing at a time” he told himself knowing it’s what Hyuck would tell him if they were together right now. He didn’t really listen to this advice of course… especially coming from his own mouth instead of his cute adorable boyfriend.Oh God. I wish he was here so bad. But Haechan was still at the dance studio and would be for the next several hours. That’s why y/n was even entering Haechan’s apartment right now in the first place; Daegal needed to be taken out while Haechan was gone.

He HAD to have his stupid extra long dance rehearsal today of course. On the day where he already had to finish a ton of assignments and now cram for a test. Y/n quickly threw his backpack on the ground and sprinted over to daegal scooping her up before she even knew what was happening. While he waited for Daegal to do her business and walk around a little, y/n got back to planning his study schedule in his head. If I start by studying for the exam… I can trade every 45 minutes from cramming to working on the lab report for my other class. Fuck! That depends on whether the others ever filled in their data. Ok so I’ll save that for the end and work on the PowerPoint instead even though it’s due the longest from now. As long as I cut myself off at around 1:00 am, that should be enough sleep to take the exam at 9:30 the next day. It was going to be a rough night, but y/n decided he’d just have to work away and hope for the best.

Y/N went back inside and scooped his backpack up again to go work in Hyuck’s bedroom. He found the smell of his boyfriend clinging to the room to be extremely comforting and he hoped it would help him stay calm and focused on his work. He opened up his laptop to the lecture notes for the exam and began skimming them for any confusing topics that jumped out at him. What the? I only know like 2 of these concepts?? I’m screwed. Y/N new from plenty of old tests that it would only make things worse if he worried about it now, and feeling himself start to panic, he decided to work on the PowerPoint instead. He figured he should just finish all his other assignments so that he could then spend the entire rest of the night studying.

An hour into working on the PowerPoint y/n’s phone buzzed. He opened it to find a message from one of his lab partners that read “hey y/n I’m really sorry but I’m actually boarding a plane right now so I’m not gonna be able to finish my part of the lab. Maybe you can ask [partner name 2] for her data? I think she got mine down too.”

Y/n: “I’ll ask her.”

Partner 1: “KK.”

“Gotta go, sorry again!”

Partner 2: “Shit. I don’t have her values either y/n. I’m pretty sure that part of the lab was online though, so one of us can just do the lab at home right now.”

“Oh wait actually, I have to take both of my finals on Monday. It’s due Tuesday right? So I won’t have time to do her part. Y/n any chance you can do it?”

Y/n: “ I only have one midterm tomorrow… I guess I can do it if no one else can.”

Partner 2: “Ur the best bro! Tysm <3”

Y/n: …

.

.

Fuck me. How am I supposed to do [p/n 1]’s work for them on top of everything else? Y/n barely had enough time to do all his work as it was. And he had done all of HIS work on the lab already too. He thought he’d just quickly analyze his partner’s data and then turn it in… but no. This is totally unfair. I have more work than either of them, and I’m doing their work for them too on top of it all. Y/n’s eyes grew misty for a second threatening to turn into tears, but y/n shook his head hard and the urge to cry went away for now. He had to get back to— wait no. He needed to cook dinner. With no Hyuck home to cook dinner like usual, he was going to starve if he didn’t make something for himself. Standing up quickly y/n smacked his arm on Hyuck’s dresser skinning it in the process. Great. Now he was bleeding. And it had gotten on his white shirt too. Except it wasn’t his shirt, it was his boyfriend’s shirt that he had borrowed. Y/n was this close to screaming in frustration, but stripped off the shirt quickly and made his way to the bathroom to clean the spot before it stained. And of course, he needed to throw it in the washer if he really didn’t want it to stain, and that meant he should really just do all of Haechan’s laundry now. So heart now racing in a slight panic, y/n gathered the laundry and started the cycle as quickly as possible so that he could start on dinner.

Opting for the most time efficient option, y/n grabbed some pasta and left it to boil while he got back to work for a few minutes. There sure was a lot on his mind now between the pasta he was cooking, Daegal (who he suddenly remembered needed to be fed as well), the lab report, the final exam in a day, Haechan’s laundry that still needed to be dried, folded, and put away, and the millions of other things he needed to get done before going home to his family at the end of the week. And the trip home would be another ordeal that required a lot of planning and prep work. Y/n had a lot of problems at home due to his conservative family and their recent discovery that he was dating Haechan. But that’s silly. I shouldn’t worry about that right now. And it’s not like it’s anything new knowing they all disapprove of my “lifestyle choice”. That’s old news, and I need to focus on this. Y/n went back to his multitasking and eventually got Daegal fed, the laundry in the dryer, and got a good portion of the lab done.

At 10:30 y/n finally felt satisfied with the PowerPoint and had finished collecting most of the data his partner was supposed to do. So he went to wash all the dishes he had left out at dinner and put away the leftovers as a quick study break. He smiled at the pasta he’d saved for Haechan knowing it would make his boyfriend’s day to find food ready for him after a long night of dance practice. When he walked back into Hyuck’s bedroom to finish the lab, he noticed several notifications on his phone again.

Mom: Hey you’re coming home on Wednesday right? You’ll be done with finals week by then?

Dad: Hey y/n you better have a gift ready for your mother when you come home on Tuesday. She’s still pretty upset about Haechan, so you should really try to make her feel better.

Bro: Dude mom and dad are pissed cuz dad thought you were coming home Tuesday after your final, and then mom told him you said Wednesday. So he flipped and said you were probably staying longer to fuck Haechan or something

Y/N: I told them both Wednesday. I AM spending Tuesday night at Hyuck’s place. But I just wanted a night to relax before immediately coming home

Don’t tell them that… just say I’m busy or something

Bro: sorry bro, that’s not gonna work. You better come home Tuesday or they’re gonna make the trip absolute hell for you

Y/N: fuck ok fine, I’ll make it work

Y/n was getting more and more stressed by the second. And now he wouldn’t even get any sort of buffer between finals week and seeing his family. And fuck he had that feeling in his head- that feeling of anxiety setting in- making him slightly dizzy and his chest tight. Fuck. Fuck. I’m gonna have a panic attack. I know it’s coming. Should I call Hyuck? He should be on his way home by now anyway right? Ok fuck. Yeah he should call his boyfriend. Maybe he could talk him through it. He prayed he was right and Hyuck would actually answer his phone, and to his relief, Hyuck answered right away.

“y/n! I’m on my way home and practice went pretty well! I think the show is going to be really good this quarter. Have you made dinner yet? And how’s the studying going?” He was so excited to hear his y/n ie’s voice on the phone. “Hyuck.” Y/n felt the lump in his throat form and wasn’t able to get out the rest of your words as he broke into tears. “Y/n? What’s wrong love? Are you ok?” No words came out of y/n as he began to hyperventilate. Haechan could hear y/n’s shallow breathing and put together that he must be having a panic attack. He assured y/n he’d be there in the next ten minutes and stayed on the phone with him until he rushed through the door exactly ten minutes later, Immediately making his way over to y/n huddled in the corner of his bed crying and hyperventilating. From past experience he knew y:n liked him to stay close until he was able to calm down and talk.

Haechan slowly climbed into the bed, sliding his body between your back and the bed frame, wrapping his arms around you in a comforting bear hug. “I’ve got you y/n. I’ve got you, and I’m not going anywhere.” Y/n began shaking in Haechan’s arms unable to fully process what was happening with his mind completely taken over by panic at this point. Haechan rested his chin on y/n’s soft hair and hummed a song. Y/n did his best to focus on the light vibrations on his head from Haechan’s tune. “I’ll just talk about my day a little too ok y/n? Squeeze my hand if you’d like that.” Y/n’s eyes remained squeezed tight, and his body was still trembling, but he gives Haechan’s hand a light squeeze back. “Ok love. Let’s see… I saw Jungwoo today! I know he’s your favorite dance major right? He was really cool to watch, you were right! He might even be more charismatic than me” he teased. Y/n didn’t laugh out loud or acknowledge him, but he appreciated Hyuck trying to lighten the mood. “I spent most of the night working on my duet with Mark though. They have us doing this really acrobatic hiphop song and it’s a lot of work. I’ve memorized all the footwork though. It was kind of funny watching Mark struggle with it more than me for once honestly. Next time you should tag along and watch. When it’s not finals week of course!” He adds, giving a small pec to your forehead.

“Is that why you’re stressed by the way? Finals?” He doesn’t really expect y/n to give any responses yet. But much to his surprise you shake your head in response. “No. More.” Y/n says quietly, starting to breath a little more evenly. “What else baby? What’s stressing you out.”

“Everything!” Y/n exclaims. “So much. TOO much” y/n squeaks out bursting into more tears. Haechan gently shushes you and squeezes his arms tighter around your body and begins planting little kisses all over your head to comfort you. “It’s ok y/n. It’s ok.” Hyuck can feel y/n’s body body relax a tiny bit despite his sobs. Y/n spins around melting into Haechan and burying his face in his chest

To be continued…

[winchesterwild78]

Chance Meeting pt 20

Chance Meeting Master list

18+ Minors DO NOT interact

Please be kind and all mistakes are my own. All work is mine. Please don’t take or copy it.

Warnings: Fluff, Anxiety, pregnancy, SMUT, tension

A/N: lots of things happening in this chapter. Our lovebirds are moving forward with their lives and Ashley is hanging over their heads still. I edited this quickly, so please overlook any errors.

———————————————————————

About a month later you and Jensen were waiting to hear back from the police and his attorney about Ashley and the baby. Since the incident that landed you in the hospital you haven’t heard from her and she’s not been around. You were cautiously optimistic you wouldn’t hear from her.

Jensen insisted you two moved forward with the wedding plans. “Y/N I want nothing more than to marry you. I don’t want her to cast a shadow over our relationship and our marriage. Let’s set a date and start planning.” He said taking your hand. You smiled and shook your head yes. He cupped your face and kissed you softly.

“You know the area better than I do, where would you want to have the wedding” you asked him. “Honestly if you’re okay with it I was thinking the brewery. It has plenty of space and the area is beautiful. We can have the ceremony outside and the reception inside.” He said with a little hesitation. “It’s your choice though. I don’t care where we get married as long as I get to marry you.” He said with a smile. “Honey, it’s not just my choice. This is OUR wedding and I want us both to make the important decisions” you said kissing his lips. “So, has the brewery ever hosted a wedding before” you asked. “No, but it’s something we’ve always wanted to do.” Jensen said looking at you. “Well, let’s do it then. Our wedding being there will be a perfect opportunity to show how beautiful a wedding there could be. I’m sure people will try to book it for their wedding before we can even say I do.” You said laughing.

“I swear you’re an angel, Y/N. Even though this is our wedding you’re still thinking about other people’s happiness and livelihood. I love you so much.” Jensen said kissing your lips. “I love you too baby” you said.

So what time of year were you thinking” you asked. “How about tomorrow” he said with a smirk. You rolled your eyes and smiled. “Well since it’s going to be outside I say we have it closer to Fall so it will be a bit cooler.” You said. “How about the day we met in October? What about October 12th” he said. “That’s perfect and we will never forget the date” you said winking at him. It was mid February so you felt like you had plenty of time to plan. You also were hoping the baby situation would be resolved before then. “So now all that’s left for us to do is tell our families we’ve set a date and start planning. I hope Gen can help as much as possible” you said. “Babe, is this gonna be a suit and tie kinda wedding or nice shirt and slacks” Jensen asked. “I think more casual and laid back. I have a dress idea in mind so that would fit perfectly with the theme. You can wear a simple shirt and slacks. No need to wear a suit and be uncomfortable.” You said laying your head on his shoulder. “I love that idea sweetheart. Keeping it laid back and comfortable is going to be so great.” He said.

You started texting family and friends letting them know you’ve set a date. Gen offered to help with anything you needed. As you’re texting Jensen’s phone rang. He answered it and you could tell from his end of the conversation it was his attorney. “Yes, oh that’s great. Yeah I can be there soon. Okay, yeah. See you then” he said before he hung up. You looked at him and he looked a little nervous. “So they have Ashley in custody and they have the DNA from the baby. They need me down at the hospital to give a DNA sample to see if I’m the father.” He said looked at you. Your heart was beating fast and panic started rising through your body. You spoke softly “okay. Go to the hospital so we can find out if the baby is yours or not. We need to know no matter the outcome.” You looked at him and tears pricked your eyes. You knew he didn’t betray you, but this situation still hurt. Jensen walked over to you and pulled you into his strong arms. Rubbing your back he kissed your head. “I love you so much, and whatever the outcome that’s not going to change it. Come with me please.” He said as he kissed you. You nodded yes and started to get ready to leave.

You sent Gen a text to let her know what was going on. She told you she’d meet you at the hospital if you needed her and you said you were fine, but thank you. The ride to the hospital was quiet. Tension crackling in the air. Jensen was nervous. His leg kept bouncing as he drove. You just stared out the window trying not to cry. Jensen pulled into the hospital and parked. He took your hand and held you as the two of you walked in the hospital. His attorney met you two at the entrance and took you to the lab. Once in the lab they swabbed the inside of his cheek gathering as much DNA as they could. The lab technician told Jensen there was a rush put on the test and the results should be back in a few hours. Jensen thanked them and walked out.

You stood and he took your hand. “They said it should be a few hours before we know.” He said walking out with you. “Okay, hopefully we hear something soon.” You said nervously. “Is she still here at the hospital” you asked his attorney. “Yeah, she has to stay for observation after the procedure for at least a night. She’s guarded so she’s not going anywhere.” The attorney said. “Jensen, I want to go talk to her.” You said looking at him. “Are you sure” he asked you. You nodded yes. He asked his attorney if it was okay and he said he didn’t see why not. The three of you returned to the hospital and you rode the elevator to the floor she was on.

Stepping off the elevator your stomach was doing flips. You were nervous but you needed to speak to her. Jensen held your hand as you approached the door. The police officer and Jensen’s attorney talked for a second and then they motioned you towards them. “You ready sweetheart” Jensen asked walking towards the door. You shook your head yes. Jensen pushed open the door and you heard the fetal monitor and heard the rapid heartbeat of the baby. A lump formed in your throat.

Ashley looked up and saw Jensen first. “Oh my god. You came back to me. I knew you loved me and you would do the right thing” she said smiling at him. Then you stepped out from behind him. Her eyes narrowed and she hissed “what the hell is she doing here”. “I’m here to talk to you. Jensen and I have talked and if this baby is his then he will step up and be there for him. Any decisions about him will be left up to the both of you. However, you will have to respect me as his wife and our family. I will respect you as the baby’s mother, but you will not try to put a wedge between Jensen and I. It’s not going to work. If you can’t respect that then we will have no choice but to set up a visitation arrangement where someone else brings the child to Jensen.” You told her standing between her and Jensen. You weren’t going to let her intimidate you.

She huffed at you and said fine. Ashley looked at Jensen and said “hey Jens do you want to feel him kick” You cringed when she called him Jens. He looked at her and then at you. “Honey if you want to you can. It’s fine” you said offering him a soft smile. “Ashley, I think it’s better if I don’t. I want to know if the child is mine before I start getting involved” Jensen said looking at her. You thought to yourself “oh thank god”. You felt horrible for thinking it, but the thought of him touching her made you sick to your stomach. She pouted but didn’t push him.

“Honey, we need to leave. We’ve got plans tonight” you said wrapping your arm around his. He leaned in and kissed your head. “We will talk to you later Ashley. Once we get the results we’ll be in touch” you said looking at her. “Have a good night and get some rest” Jensen said. “Bye Jens. We love you” She said rubbing her belly. You gripped his arm tightly and walked towards the door.

Once outside the room you let out the breath you had been holding. Jensen pulled you into his arms and held you tight. You sobbed. So overwhelmed with seeing her, hearing the heartbeat and scared the baby is his. The possibility seemed to be better than you thought. You were scared. Even though he said it wouldn’t change anything you knew it would. You would have to put up with the woman who assaulted you for the sake of the child. You wanted her out of your lives. Now it seemed like she was there for the rest of your lives.

Once you calmed down you and Jensen left the hospital and headed home. The drive home was quiet. Jensen nervously bit his lip and you sat staring out the window. When you got home you both walked the house and kicked off your shoes. You both collapsed on the couch. Jensen took you in his arms and you laid your head on his chest. “We’re going to get through this together baby. I promise. I love you and I intend on spending the rest of my life showing you how much I do.” He kissed your lips. First it was soft and gentle. Then he kissed you deeply and the kiss became more passionate.

His hands tugged at the hem of your shirt and then under it. You gasped at his touch. His hands roamed up and over your breasts. He pulled your bra down and rolled your nipple between his fingers. Your head flew backwards and you let out a loud moan.

You helped him remove your shirt and he unhooked your bra exposing your breasts to the chilly air. He removed his shirt and you straddled him. You moved your hips down onto him. Jensen’s hands ran down your back and pulled you into a kiss. As he pulled away he bit your bottom lip. You moaned. You stood and removed your pants and soaking wet panties. Jensen removed his pants and boxers exposing his hard cock. You bit your bottom lip as you looked at him. You straddled him again and used a hand to help guide him through your folds. You slowly slid down his shaft as you felt yourself stretching around him. Jensen and you moaned as you pushed down all the way. You put your hands on the back of his neck and he dug his fingers into your hips. You began bouncing up and down taking him in as deep as you could. The sounds of moaning and flesh hitting flesh filled the air. Jensen quickly turned and laid you on the couch and began thrusting deeper into you. You reached your hand between you and Jensen and started rubbing your clit. You felt the coil tightening and your walls clenching around Jensen. His thrusts got deep and fast helping you chase your release. “Jens I’m close” you panted out. “I know darlin, I am too. Cum for me” he said as he quickened his pace. Your walls clenched as you came hard. Jensen followed you and came deep inside. Grunts and moans echoed through the house. As you both came down from your high Jensen got up and grabbed a washcloth to clean you both up. He laid beside you on the couch and kissed you softly.

“I love you Y/N” Jensen whispered. “I love you too, Jensen” you said as you snuggled into his arms. Being in his arms you felt safe and truly loved. Jensen grabbed the blanket off the back of the couch and covered the both of you. He started rubbing your back as you buried your face in the crook of his neck. You breathed in taking in his intoxicating smell. You both sighed softly and you giggled a little. Jensen smiled.

Jensen pulled you as close as he could and the two of you laid in the comfortable silence that fell in the house. You closed your eyes starting to drift off to sleep when the silence was broken by the ringing of the phone. Jensen growled and pulled you close. You giggled “babe you need to answer your phone. It could be important”. He sighed and sat up grabbing his phone. He looked at the caller ID and shot you a look. The look sent a flood of panic through you. You sat up pulling the blanket over your body. Jensen answered the phone. “Yes this is he. Okay. Yes I understand. Okay, so it’s accurate. Right, will you let the attorneys involved know.” His end of the conversation instantly told you the results were in. His face was stone. No emotion and no indication of what the results were. Your heart beat so fast you heard it thumping in your ears. You felt nauseous and a lump formed in your throat watching him. Jensen thanked the person on the phone and hung up. Your y/c/e eyes met his and he bit his lip. “Um, that was the lab. The DNA results are back.” He said looking at you. You tried to study his expression but he was unreadable. You took his hand and said “Jens, remember we are in this together. Whatever the results we will deal with this together.” You said on the verge of tears. Jensen took a deep breath “the results are….

To be continued………

Forever tags: @nescaveckdaily @nescaveckwriter @kr804573 @jensengirl83 @k-slla @jackles010378 @jawritter @xx-spooky-little-vampire-xx @roseblue373

[cressthebest]

Crimson Rivers thoughts pt. 11

chapter 20:

1. god, i’m glad to know this bridge plan is stressing sirius out too

2. i love sirius’ pure ANGER at how reg and james’ love story is broadcasted to everyone when sirius knows that they deserve privacy.

3. 😟😧 is peter going to be a

FUCKING RAT

IN THIS FIC???? FUCK HIM FUCK YOU FUCK ALL OF YOU!! I LOVED HIM!! WHY DID HE HAVE TO DO THIS??? NOOOOOO

4. 😡😡 PETER AND DEATHEATERS, WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU, ISTG

5. 😧 vanity noooo

6. 😟 hodge would have turned 15 tomorrow. and james just pushed him in the river. fuck, well, that’s something james is gonna think about forever

7. i am NOT gonna get over vanity’s death

8. reg’s knife throwing skills came into use and yikes. i wish it didn’t have to

9. (bad timing, but nonbinary mathias has my heart)

10. oh god. irene asked regulus to give her mercy and kill her. this. wow. this hurts in ways i can’t describe.

11. everyone is fucking dying, and james just got hurt, and reg is trapped on the other side of the river. jfc this chapter is wild

12. reg, you’re having a panic attack. i understand those. listen to me and jsut follow my voice and breathe with me, okay? in and out. 1…. 2…. 3…. 4…. good. breathe please. i wanna help so bad. please i wish i could help reg breathe.

13. god, it’s hurts that in sirius’ pov, he knows that this is the biggest breakdown reg has EVER had

14. sirius, don’t do something stupid

chapter 21:

1. 😧 THIS is how the plan is formed? sirius talking to slughorn about two victors making it out as long as they’re from the same district? wow. i was almost looking forward to the death pact, while also knowing it would be out of reg’s character (and james’) so it would be unsatisfying. i like this a lot, actually

2. dorcas leaving her home in the most ratty-ass pajamas to run four miles 😭😭 she’s still a queen to me

3. marlene’s reaction is heartbreaking, honestly

4. i love how there’s the line about dorcas caring for vanity and hodge. she cares. marlene asked her to, chapters and chapters ago. and dorcas cared. this hurts

5. 😟 regulus is so angry that he plans on avenging james with what i assume is the most torturous murder to others

6. !!!!! is reg about to take that hint from slughorn? does he realize james is alive?

7. HE REALIZES!!! THANK FUCKING GOD!!! THEYRE GONNA REUNITE AND HOPEFULLY HAVE NO TRAUMA FROM THIS HORRENDOUS DAY!

8. remus comparing sirius’ excitement about slughorn’s decision to a dog >>>>>>

9. “They watch with hope.” AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

10. sirius expects people to not listen to him, so he tells remus to just tune him out, but remus loves to hear sirius talk. <33333 they’re made for each other

11. sirius having worn a dress before and enjoying it >>>>>>>

12. “”Really, your body is a galaxy, and your scars are your stars."” (remus making sirius feel better about his scars) OH MY GOD!! this is gonna be my equivalent of atyd’s “you were beautiful”

13. remus’ shirt is off and sirius wants to cry over how gorgeous he is. (when i first had sex, i cried over how pretty my partner was. i do not judge sirius for this reaction)

14. the way remus gets his moony nickname in this fic, with his scars being compared to moon craters >>>>>>>>>

15. despite sirius wanting to have sex with remus, i love his decision to wait so he’s mentally in the right place for it. and i love remus’ treatment of sirius’ relationship to sex. that’s exactly what i, as an aroace spec person, needed to hear

16. i’m so fucking PISSED that the hallow took away sirius’ acceptance of pleasure. remus and i are gonna fucking take down the hallow for that

17. authors notes say that sirius is demisexual, and i am all on board. another demisexual!! me and sirius are twinning! i love this!!

[multifandomfanficss]

More Than I’m Willing To Lose Part 1

Adrian Chase/Vigilante x Reader

Featuring platonic!11th Street Kids

Adrian Chase Masterlist

Part 2, Part 3, Part 4

Prompt: After Project Butterfly, ARGUS decided to make some new additions to the team. You and Adrian have been secretly, hopelessly in love with each other for a year now, but are unaware of the other person’s feelings. Tired of waiting for Adrian, you decide to go on a date with someone else that doesn’t end very well. This is Adrian x GN!Reader.

Warnings: Reader injury, mentions of vomit, gun violence, panic, hospitals, cannon typical Peacemaker violence and language

A/N: So funny story…I’ve actually had the first two chapters of this in my drafts since last August because I was afraid if I posted them I would never finish the fic. A year later I actually wrote two more chapters, even though this was originally only supposed to be three parts. The chapters are done, but are still going through some proofreading and light changes. I’m gonna post a chapter once a week. The original concept for this story was to write what I called at the time “the ultimate hurt/comfort”. The concept I started with was based on an episode of Criminal Minds, but it expanded overtime. I hope you guys enjoy!! ❤️🧜‍♂️❤️

You were happily kicking your feet back and fourth at the table waiting to be let go from the debriefing. After everything went down with the butterflies, ARGUS decided it would be best to expand their small Evergreen team. You were the first addition. They had planned on adding more, but after a year you were still waiting on a big enough mission to present itself for you to be assigned more muscle. Truth be told Harcourt, Adebayo, Vigilante, and Peacemaker could handle themselves. You were great help in the van when Economos needed it. An extra hand was always needed on computers and medical needs. You weren’t a fighter, but you still found your place on the team.

“What are you so happy about?” Adebayo asked in a chipper tone.

“I have a date tonight.” You say blushing. You hadn’t been on a date in a long time. Truth be told, you were holding out for a certain team member of yours, but you feared Adrian would never get the hint and ask you out, let alone even have feelings for you, so you were doing your best to move on. He sat up a little straighter in his chair and stayed uncharacteristically quite, but you didn’t really notice. You were preoccupied by thoughts about your date and questions from your teammates.

“You got a date? Who would wanna date you?” Chris laughs. You roll your eyes.

“A really hot guy! Who’s much cooler and better look than you!” You laugh back at him. You know he’s just teasing, but you can’t help, but feel just a little hurt. You push down the feeling.

“Where did you two meet?” Leota asks.

“At a bar. He walked up to me and we started talking. It was mostly about work, but I didn’t mind listening to him. His job sounded super interesting.” You tell them.

“What do you mean you talked about work? Your job is a secret.” Adrian finally spoke up.

“Well he actually did most of the talking. He doesn’t actually know anything about computers so I just rambled on about coding. He thinks I work as a computer specialist at Best Buy.” You laugh. Adrian’s face stays deadpan.

“What does he do for work?” He asks.

“He’s a lawyer, I think. I don’t know. I can’t really remember what kind of law he specializes in.” You say, hoping to end the conversation. His eyes bore into you.

“Well that’s very exciting and I hope you have fun, but not too much fun. We have to all have to be here at 9am tomorrow.” Harcourt reminds the team. Everybody groans. The meeting ends and you start walking to your car, but Adrian stops you.

“I don’t think you should go on that date.” Adrian starts.

“And why not?” You ask.

“I just have a bad feeling. I don’t think this guy is who he says he is. You barely know anything about him! What if he’s some sort of criminal?!” Adrian begs you to not go on the date. You can’t help, but begin to bubble with anger. This is the first date you’ve gone on in over a year thanks to Adrian and he doesn’t want you to go on this one and the only reason he can pull out of his ass is his stupid intuition? No. You’re going on that fucking date.

“I’m not who I say either. Does that make me dangerous? I appreciate your concern, but I’m going on the date, Adrian.” You say, before leaving him in the parking lot.

Maybe you should have listened to him. The date was nice, but if you were being honest you did feel like he was hiding something. You pushed down the feeling though because you knew you were hiding something too.

Your date Jack was nice enough. He paid for the date and walked you home. It wasn’t until you got home that you felt not just uneasy, but scared. You were walking up the stairs to your door when you heard a clicking noise. You worked around guns enough to know exactly what that sound was. You slowly turned around to confirm your suspicions.

“What are you doing?” You ask.

“Shut up. I’m the one asking the questions.” Jack says. You nod, feeling your breath catch in your throat. It isn’t often you’ve found yourself in trouble like this, but on the rare occasion this did happen your team was always there to keep you safe. Adrian was always there to keep you safe. A tear slipped down your cheek at the thought of Adrian. He told you not to go on this date and you didn’t listen to him. Now you were never going to see him again. “Where is the Task Force X headquarters?” He asks.

“What?” You ask.

“Come on, dumbass! I know you’re on their team. You’re going to tell me everything you know, including who Vigilante is and what you’re currently working on and you’re going to tell me quickly or else you’ll never see your team again.” He rambled, stepping closer, gun pointed at you.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about!” You cry and play dumb.

“You should really get better security on your home computers. Your computers at work are fine, but the second you got home and pulled out your little laptop, you were mine.” That’s when you stop dead in your tracks. You always do your work from headquarters. Always. Except for the day you worked from home sick.

“I don’t really need you. I could just take your laptop. I just thought this would be more fun. After all, the thrill came entirely from stringing you along. Burglary isn’t really my style and I didn’t really feel like taking the time to hack into your laptop. You were so eager to go out with me too. I barley had to ask.” He laughs before pulling the trigger. You feel a sharp pain in your shoulder and you fall to the ground with a scream, at least you think you screamed. You can’t hear anything over the ringing in your ears. You can’t move. All you can do is cry. You feel hands all over you, searching your pockets. Your keys are taken from you as you watch Jack break into your house. As quickly as he’s in, he’s out, laptop in hand. He’s got what he needs and now he’s going to leave you to die. The ringing starts to go down and you start to feel hands on your body again. You try to move, but cry out in pain. You clench your eyes shut in both fear and pain.

“Please don’t touch me. Please. Please get away from me. Please don’t hurt me anymore” You beg. You don’t know who is above you, but you just hope it isn’t Jack or whoever he may be working with.

“Shhh it’s gonna be okay. I’m here. It’s me. It’s Adrian.” You hear his calming voice and you open your tear stained eyes to see him above you in his Vigilante suit. Your steady stream of tears turns into sobs. You hear footsteps approaching quickly and you start to hyperventilate.

“Peacemaker!” Adrian calls over his shoulder. When you realize it’s just Chris you calm down a little. “We need to get them help.” Adrian says, voice quivering.

“What happened?” Chris asks in shock.

“You were right.” You cry out, taking a deep breath. “I shouldn’t have gone on the date. You were both right. Who would want to go on a date with me? I should have known.” You hiccup through your cries. Chris stiffens.

“Hey, don’t talk like that! We need to go get them help.” Adrian says. You let go of any tears you were previously holding back.

“Please don’t leave me!” You cry. Adrian weaves one hand through your hair and the other holds your cheek as he lightly brushes his thumb across your skin.

“I promise I’ll never leave you. Peacemaker’s gonna go get my car.” Adrian promises.

“I am?” Chris asks.

“Yes, you are dude.” Adrian says, tossing him his keys. Chris runs a couple blocks to the car.

“I’m sorry.” You whine after your sobs subside a little.

“Why are you sorry?” Adrian asks.

“I didn’t listen to you. I should have listened to-“

“No, it’s okay. It’s not your fault.” Adrian cuts you off. Your eyes start to feel heavy.

“Hey, stay with me. Stay awake.” He shakes you lightly.

“I’m so tired. Adrian, I’m so scared. Am I going to die?” You ask him. You think you might faintly hear the car pulling up.

“No, I’m not going to let that happen. Peacemaker’s here. We’re going to take you to the hospital. This is going to hurt, okay?” Adrian asks. You nod and brace yourself, but when he picks you up you don’t think you could have prepared yourself for that kind of pain. You scream and grip his arms, chest, neck- anything you can hold onto.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” Adrian rambles out a spew of apologies. Chris hits the gas pedal as soon as you are in the back seat with Adrian.

“I feel like I’m gonna be sick.” You whine.

“It’s okay. You can get sick if you need to. I won’t be upset with you.” Adrian secretly cringes at the thought of you throwing up in his car, but he knows you can’t help it.

“Actually can you try to hold it in because if you get sick, I’ll get sick and I can’t drive and throw up.” Chris requests. Adrian gives him a death glare from the rear view mirror. The two speed to the only hospital they know they can go to, the hospital they all went to after the final fight with the butterflies. The staff is less than happy to see Vigilante and Peacemaker walk back in, but they already know what the two men look like under the mask and the helmet, so it was the safest place to go. When you arrive you’re immediately placed on a bed and rolled away.

“No, I need him! Please!” You scream as you’re hauled away from Adrian. You don’t know wether to call him Adrian or Vigilante because your consciousness is slipping and you can’t remember what he’s dressed as, you just know you need him by your side. The nurses hold you down.

“Don’t move. You’re going to make things worse. He’ll be in the waiting room until you’re out of surgery.” The nurse promised. It broke Adrian’s heart to hear you cry for him and not be able to run to you, but he knew if he interfered that it would only take them longer to help you. The truth was he was scared too. He had never been this scared before. He had never felt like this in his life. He realized he was now also on the verge of throwing up.

“They’re gonna be fine.” Chris promised, placing a had on Adrian’s shoulder. He wasn’t 100% confident, but Adrian didn’t need to know that.

By the time you woke up, the whole team was there and Adrian was in his street clothes again. You saw everyone standing outside the waiting room talking while Adrian slept in a chair with his head against your mattress. You couldn’t really understand what they were saying so you just tuned them out. Instead you focused on Adrian’s breathing and his soft messy curls. You traced each curl with your eyes to calm yourself.

Outside your room the team was talking about you and, little did you know, Adrian.

“I’ve never seen him like this before. I’ve never seen him care so much about someone.” Chris starts.

“I thought he didn’t have emotions.” Economos questions.

“Everyone has emotions, even Adrian.” Adebayo added.

“It’s true. I’ve seen him cry before.” Harcourt added her two cents. They all give her a look.

“But can we at least agree he’s being MORE emotional than usual?” Economos asks. They all nod.

Back in the room you decide to start playing with Adrian’s hair. He jolts awake, only to realize it’s just you and he relaxes into your fingers. He then fully realizes it’s you again and practically jumps out of his seat.

“You’re awake! I’m so thankful that Peacemaker and I were patrolling that area and heard the gun shot. Never do anything like that to me ever again!” Adrian exclaims.

“I’m sorry.” You apologize.

“Don’t be sorry. Just don’t do it again.” Adrian sighs, taking your hand in his. The rest of the team must have heard your conversation because they start to shuffle in.

“Hey, kid.” Chris says softly. You always hated that nickname when you started to work with the team, but you had grown to love it. It was given to you because you were the youngest on the team. You were a few years younger than Adrian making you over 10 years younger than Chris.

“How are you feeling?” Adebayo asks.

“Not so hot.” You make an effort at a laugh. You grip Adrian’s hand a little tighter unintentionally and he gives your hand back a squeeze to remind you he’s there. It’s hard to feel all of the spotlight on you. You can’t help, but feel like you’ve fucked up badly. John shifts uncomfortably where he stands.

“I’m gonna head back the van. I’ll be on coms when you get what you need.” Economos starts to head out.

“What do you need?” You ask.

“Could you give us some privacy?” Harcourt asks for the room. Chris and Adebayo leave to stand outside the door. Adrian reluctantly stands up, but you don’t let go of his hand. It’s embarrassing how you hear your heart monitor increase at the thought of him leaving you again. Harcourt must sense or literally hear your panic, despite trying to keep it down.

“Chase can stay if you want.” She says. You nod and he sits back down. Your heartbeat falls into a steady pace when he starts to rub his thumb against your hand.

“I need to ask you a few questions. They might be kind of hard to answer, but it‘s very important you answer them to keep yourself and the rest of us safe. You can take a break at any time.” She tells you and you nod. The first questions she asked were about Jack’s appearance. It was easy to describe hair color, but when you had to go more into detail it almost felt like you were back there with him. Your heart monitor increased again. You felt a tear slip down your cheek. You avoided looking at Adrian. You should have listened to him when he told you not to go on the date. You then went into detail on what he was looking for and what he asked you. By the end you were crying so hard you could barely get out the words.

“I think they should take a break.” Adrian told Harcourt.

“No, I have to keep going.” You told him.

“No, you don’t (Y/N). You can take a break.” She tells you.

“I have to keep going. It was my fault. First I didn’t check to make sure my connection was secure on my laptop and then I went on a date with him even though you said I shouldn’t. I should have believed you and Chris. Why would a guy like me? It’s my fault. He said I made it easy.” You cry.

“It’s not your fault. Chris was just being an asshole. You are worthy of attention from guys. It’s not your fault you try to see the best in people. Hell, I wonder what you see in me and why you’re my friend everyday.” Adrian says. Truth be told you see much more in Adrian than you’ve ever told him. You think you might love him, but you know you can’t say that. You can’t handle the rejection right now.

“I’m going to go out to the van. I think John’s got something.” She informs you. You forgot they were wearing coms and you weren’t. It was odd to not have their voices in your ear.

After everyone is gone you look back to Adrian.

“Hey Adrian, can I ask you a favor?” You ask.

“I’ll do literally anything for you.” You smile at him.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to…” You trail off, embarrassed by your request.

“What is it? Whatever it is, I’ll do it.” Adrian says, very adamant on helping you.

“Can you lay in bed with me and hold me?” You ask quietly. He smiles.

“Move over.” He instructs you as he helps you settle into the other side of the bed. He takes off his shoes and slowly climbs in, sliding his arms around you. You place your head on his chest so you can hear his heartbeat. You start to drift off to sleep to the sound of his heartbeat and the feeling of his chest rising and falling with his breath.

“I promise I’m never going to let anything like this happen again. I’m going to keep you safe. I’ll make this right. I love you.” He says as you fade away. He must have thought you were already sleeping. You would respond if you didn’t feel so heavy. You’re not even sure if you heard him right. You could just be high on pain meds. You probably just imagined it.

[domripley]

First Time

pairing: lottie matthews x laura lee

warnings: top lottie, bottom laura, characters are 18+, college au, fingering, oral sex, lube, shy laura, fluff, begging.

summary: laura confides in lottie.

kinktober 23/24’: first time

word count: 2.2k

part three of ?

edited by my lovely girlfriend @specialinterestshows 🥰

Laura took a deep breath, watching as Lottie focused on writing her paper. Normally when they would have study sessions with the group, Laura would be focused. But after overhearing her best friend talk about how Nat and her fucked (Your Name), that was all Laura could think about. She wasn’t jealous - far from it really - she was just curious. It was no secret in the friend group that she was a virgin and although they didn’t care, Laura wanted to at least do it once. She just wasn’t sure on how to go about asking, or even who she would pick.

There was Nat, but she had noticed how rough she was right off the bat. Taissa and Van were monogamous and although she could pick Jackie or Shauna, she was drawn to Lottie. Lottie was soft spoken and comforting, and Laura had always had a crush on her.

“Hey…” Laura took a deep breath, whispering to get Lottie’s attention.

“Hey yourself,” Lottie smiled, looking up from her laptop. “What’s up?”

Laura looked around, not wanting anyone to overhear what she was about to say. “I… I’ve been thinking…”

“About?” Lottie pushed.

Laura took a deep breath, there was no backing out now. “I want you to take my virginity.”

Laura could barely look at Lottie, but she needed to try and read her facial expression as she sat there in silence. She was panicking now - did she just fuck her friendship up, having thought it would be okay to ask? She prayed for Lottie to say something, anything, before she had a panic attack.

Finally, after a minute of silence, Lottie spoke up. “Are you sure?” she asked, licking her lips before looking back down at her laptop,

Laura nodded, “I’m sure.”

Lottie wiped the sweat from her forehead, “Okay.”

Laura furrowed her eyebrows, “Okay?”

“When are you free?” Lottie asked, taking a drink from her water bottle. “And are you sure you want to do this? It’s okay if you don’t want to.”

“Lottie,” Laura said, her face red with embarrassment. “I want to do this, especially with you.”

Lottie smirked, “So when are you free, Lau?”

“Tonight or- or tomorrow night. Whatever works best for you,” Laura said, refusing to look at Lottie any longer. She wasn’t sure why she was so shy, when she and Lottie had been friends for years.

“Tonight works, I just have to text Nat,” Lottie says, grabbing her phone out of her pocket.

“Wait,” Laura said.

Lottie paused mid-movement, waiting for Laura to continue.

“Don’t cancel your plans for me,” Laura said, shaking her head. “Tomorrow night can work just as much as tonight.”

“Oh,” Lottie laughed. “I’m not canceling plans; I’m just letting her know that I won’t be available for tonight in case she gets bored. That’s all, I promise. I wouldn’t cancel plans or anything, I would just make our plans for a different day!”

Laura nodded. “Okay.”

Lottie gathered all her stuff up, putting it all in her backpack before getting up. “I’m gonna head out, but I’ll be at yours around seven-thirty or eight.”

Laura watched Lottie walk away, her face still red. She took a deep breath, trying to figure out how she was able to ask that right then and there when she had been building the courage up for weeks.

Laura rushed back to her dorm room, taking two showers to make sure that she was completely clean. She cleaned some of her room, wanting to make sure that her best friend was comfortable while she was there. When it was seven-twenty-nine, she set out snacks that she knew Lottie would like. She was so busy with cleaning and making things perfect, she almost screamed when there was a knock on the door.

Laura rushed to the door, opening it with a smile when she saw Lottie standing there with a different backpack - one she had never seen before. She moved out of the way, allowing the brunette to step inside before she closed the door and locked it.

“Hey,” Laura said.

“Hey,” Lottie smiled, “How are you feeling?”

Laura thought about it for a few seconds, “A little nervous but other than that, good.”

Lottie smiled, “Thank you for being honest with me… I’m assuming you don’t want to do this out here. Show me your room?”

Laura nodded, leading Lottie to her bedroom and once they were both inside, she shut the door. “You… You can sit on the bed if you’d like,” Laura said. She sat down on it first and Lottie was quick to follow her.

“So,” Lottie spoke up, turning to look at Laura. “What are you not comfortable with?”

Laura jumped a little as Lottie placed her hand gently on her thigh as she waited for her to answer.

“Well… no anal or even touching there… um… nothing with knives or things that could hurt me?” Laura said.

Lottie smiled, “We aren’t doing anything that rough today. Don’t think about things like that.”

Laura nodded. “Okay. I’m not sure what I like or don’t like except for kissing. I’m a bit too shy to uh…”

“To make out? Cute,” Lottie said, licking her lips. “Don’t worry, if you don’t want to do that today, that’s completely okay with me.”

Laura nodded, “Thank you.”

“Of course,” Lottie leaned in, kissing Laura’s neck gently. “Is this okay?”

Laura moved so her neck was on display for Lottie, “Y- Yes, it’s more than okay, Lot.”

Lottie hummed, sucking on her neck - she wanted everyone to know that Laura was hers after this. “Oh-“ she gasped just as Lottie pulled away.

“Why don’t you take this pretty shirt off for me?” Lottie suggested, tugging at Laura’s shirt sleeve.

Laura stood up, keeping her eyes on Lottie’s thighs as she pulled her shirt off. Throwing it on the ground, she covered her chest in embarrassment.

“Don’t hide from me,” Lottie demanded, moving so she was sitting fully in the bed with her back to the headboard. “C’mere.”

Laura looked at Lottie’s lap as she was patting it - making her way onto the bed so she sat down down on her. Laura bit her lip as she saw the way Lottie was looking at her.

“You like when I mark you?” Lottie asked, bringing her hand up to Laura’s mouth. She tapped two of her fingers on the blonde’s lips and as soon as she opened her mouth, Lottie pushed them in. “I asked you a question, baby.”

Laura nodded, trying her best to suck on Lottie’s fingers. Lottie hummed, “Good girl.”

Laura let out a soft moan at Lottie’s praise as she took in her fingers further into her mouth. “You wanna try sucking on something else, baby?” she asked, pulling her fingers out of Laura’s mouth.

“Like… like what?” she asked.

Lottie gently moved her off her lap so she could get off the bed. Lottie pulled her own shirt off, followed by unbuckling her pants so she could pull them down and off. Without saying a word, Lottie grabbed her backpack and took out a strapon - the smallest one she owned. When Laura turned to look at what the brunette was doing, her eyes widened.

Lottie grabbed a bottle of lube out of her backpack as well, she turned to set the stuff on the bed. “Take your pants and underwear off. I want you to lay on the bed and wait for me,” Lottie instructed.

Laura did as she was told quickly, putting her clothes with her others before climbing onto the bed. She waited patiently, watching as Lottie put the toy on and climbed onto the bed to join her.

“Wait- Lot-“ Laura panicked, but Lottie shook her head.

“Oh you thought we were going straight for it?” Lottie asked, trying to contain her laughter. “No baby, I have to get this pretty pussy all nice and ready for my cock.”

Lottie laid down on her stomach so her face was level with Laura’s pussy. Turning her head so she could kiss the skin on her left thigh, before doing the same on her right thigh. When Lottie’s gaze went down to Laura’s pussy, she licked her lips at how wet she was already.

“You smell so good,” Lottie hummed, kissing Laura’s bush, causing the blonde to blush even harder.

“I- I’m sorry I didn’t shave…” Laura trailed off, closing her eyes as Lottie continued to kiss her everywhere she could reach.

”Don’t Lottie said, leaning in to rub her nose through it. “I prefer it.”

Lottie moved down so she was more comfortable before bringing her mouth to Laura’s pussy. She placed a gentle kiss to her clit, pulling away as she licked her lips. ”Fuck,” Lottie moaned, looking up to see that Laura was surprisingly looking down at her.

“You keep your eyes on me, understood?” Lottie instructed. Although she wasn’t domming Laura, she couldn’t help but want her to listen.

Laura nodded but that wasn't good enough for Lottie. “I need you to say it, baby, or you’re not getting my mouth,” Lottie smirked, bringing her hand to the blonde’s pussy. Lottie took a single finger, running it gently through Laura’s folds. Smirking as Laura whined, fighting the urge to close her eyes and doing as Lottie instructed. “Come on, baby, tell me what you’re going to do.”

Laura whined as Lottie sped up her finger, “I- I need to keep my eyes on you!”

Without saying another word, Lottie leaned in, replacing her finger with her tongue. She hummed, running the tip of her tongue through her folds before wrapping her lips around her clit. Laura cried out as Lottie began to suck gently - she gripped the sheets as she tried to grind against her mouth. Lottie brought her arms to Laura’s thighs to hold her in place.

Lottie moved one hand and brought it between her legs. Pulling her mouth away just as she lined a single finger to Laura’s entrance. She slid her finger in slowly, licking her bottom lip as Laura was struggling to keep eye contact with her.

“Good fuckin’ girl,” Lottie praised as she slid the full length of her finger inside. Lottie spit on Laura’s pussy, bringing her thumb to rub it in against her clit. “Can’t wait to have you on my cock.”

“L- Lot-“ Laura whimpered as the brunette slipped a second finger into her. “Please.”

Lottie tilted her head, “Please what?”

She fucked her fingers in and out of Laura, finally adding a third one as she wait for the blonde to respond. Lottie slapped Laura’s thigh lightly, getting her to focus on what she had been asking “Please, what?” Lottie asked once more.

“I- I don’t know… just feels so good and I don’t want you to stop,” Laura pleaded, looking at Lottie with wide eyes. Lottie almost stopped anyway, wanting to hear her beg even more, but told herself that would be for later as she curled her fingers.

“You’re squeezing around my fingers,” Lottie pointed out. When Laura nodded, Lottie continued. “I want you to come for me. Go on.”

Laura did as she was told, coming with a small cry as Lottie fucked her through her orgasm. As soon as she came down from her orgasm, Lottie pulled her fingers out and brought them to her lips. She sucked on her fingers, maintaining eye contact with the blonde as she finally looked away. Normally Lottie would spank her for that, but this wasn’t the time for that.

Lottie sat up on her knees in between Laura’s legs, grabbing the bottle of lube before squirting some onto her fingers. She slowly pushed her now-lubed fingers back into Laura’s pussy, studying her face to make sure she was okay.

“F- Fuck, Lot,” Laura whined. She was sensitive and her nerves from earlier were now completely gone. “Please.”

Lottie removed her fingers, squirting some lube on the dildo. Laura watched as she sat the bottle on the nightstand before grabbing the base of it. She lined the tip up with Laura’s entrance, pushing in slowly. Once it was in, she waited for Laura to let her know she could continue. After a minute of waiting, she nodded, and Lottie pushed the rest of the strapon inside of her as slowly as she could.

“How do you feel, baby?” Lottie asked, leaning down to take one of Laura’s nipples into her mouth.

“So… full,” Laura whimpered as Lottie brought one of her hands down to play with her clit. “Please move, I need you.”

Lottie removed her mouth from her nipple before she began to move at a slow pace, just to get the blonde used to the feeling of being stretched. After a few minutes of this pace, Lottie sped up.

“More, please, just-“ Laura cut herself off with a moan as Lottie listened to what she was starting to beg for.

“That’s what you want? Me to fuck you harder?” Lottie teased.

All Laura could do was nod, focusing on how good it felt as Lottie fucked her at a bruising pace. The room was silent, only filled with their heavy breathing and when Laura’s orgasm hit, she held her breath as Lottie fucked her through it.

Finally, Laura let out a breath, causing her to tear up. “Fuck,” she whimpered as Lottie pulled out of her.

Lottie wiped her tears away, giving her a soft smile. “You did so good, baby,” she praised, kissing Laura’s cheek. “I know you’re comfortable, but you need to get up and pee.”

Laura whined, “Do I have to?”

Lottie sighed playfully, “Yes, then we can eat those snacks you put out for us. I’m hungry.”

Laura smiled, “And cuddle, right?”

Lottie nodded. “Fuck yes.”

[thetargaryenbride]

Nail To The Coffin - Chapter 5

Warnings: curse words, abusive father 

Pairing: Steve Harrington x f!Byers!Reader

Word Count: 8K

A.N: We’ve reached the point in the story where we meet Lonnie and see what kind of influence he had on reader. In the show it’s not specified what he had done in order for him to divorce Joyce but I looked it up and it turns out he was quite an abusive piece of shit. I’ve made that part of him stand out a bit more, hence why I’ve put the warning. Of course, feel free to give constructive criticism if you feel like something can be improved in the story or if I’ve made the characters OOC. It’s very important for me to try keep the characters in character so please correct me if you see me stray from that path haha. Hope you like the chapter~  ❤️

Masterlist || Chapter 4 || Chapter 6

After the discovery at the morgue, Hopper had brought you back home before driving off towards the lab, leaving you worried beyond belief. But that worry had gotten pushed aside momentarily when your eyes landed on an unfamiliar car parked in front of your house.

You quietly opened the front door and poked your head inside, not wanting to alert anyone as you strained your ears to hear if someone was in there.

“I don’t know what to do,” you heard your mother’s voice, and your body relaxed. For a moment there you had been filled with panic, thinking that this unfamiliar car had something to do with the people from outside the restaurant. You thought Hopper was right when he said he didn’t know how far they could go and that maybe they had come here to take you and your family.

“This whole time… I… I could… I could feel him,” she rasped out. “He was… He was so close. He was right there. I knew he was alive. Our hands… our hands were almost touching. Now it’s like I… God, it’s like I can’t feel him anymore… Don’t look at me like that.”

Before you even had the time to feel confused about what she was talking about and who she was talking to, you heard a familiar voice that you had hoped to never hear again.

“Like what?”

“Like how everybody is looking at me. Like I’m out of my damn mind!”

“Hey… You’re not gonna like this but I think you need to seriously consider the possibility that all this… It’s in your head.”

“I can’t believe you had the audacity to show up,” you snarled as you strolled further into the house, causing your parents to snap their heads to look at you.

“Y/N,” your mom stood up immediately and rushed to your side, pulling you in a tight hug. “Where have you been all day, sweetie? I got worried,” she sniffed as she looked at you, cupping your cheek and running a finger over the band-aid there.

“I’ve been with Hopper. We, uh…” you hesitated, your eyes darting between her and your father, as your hand went to grasp hers. “I’ll tell you all about it later, ok?”

“Hey, kid,” your moment was interrupted by the man approaching you and your soft expression morphed into an angry glare.

“Ma… I thought you threw away the trash,” you grumbled and your father let out a huff.

“Don’t speak to me like that, kiddo.”

“Or what? What are you gonna do? Hit me?” you challenged and your mother shut her eyes in despair, lips tightening. “And don’t call me ‘kiddo’. You don’t have that right,” you rushed past him as you went to your room and opened one of the drawers, pulling out a flashlight before heading out and towards the front door again.

“W-where are you going?” asked Joyce incredulously and you spun to face her.

“I dropped my bag in the forest, not far away from Hopper’s place. I’m going to go take it. If he’s still here by the time I come back, I’m gonna go sleep at a friend,” you explained as you quickly jogged out of the house, not giving your mom a chance to catch up with you and stop you. The plan was to go look for your bag tomorrow at sunrise and then go back home to wait for Hopper’s return before the funeral.

 At least you hoped and prayed that he would return.

But with your father in the picture, you didn’t want to stay at the house at all.

It took you a while.

You had to go all the way to the bottom of the quarry and trace your steps but eventually, you had reached the place where you had collapsed and gotten high to the point of passing out. You frowned as you bent to pick up your bag, rummaging through it to check if all your belongings were in there, just in case.

Everything was intact.

Good. At least one thing was ok in your life. It was small and insignificant but it was something.

“Fuck,” you muttered as you looked at your watch, noticing it was around midnight. You had been out here for a couple of hours.

Suddenly, the atmosphere turned much eerier than you gave it credit for. You got chills all over your body and the horrible, gnawing sensation you had gotten the night Will had disappeared returned full force. You froze as you heard growling not too far away from you and rushed to turn off the flashlight, pressing your back against the tree. There was some shuffling and shortly after a deer came out of the bushes. You let out a sigh, body relaxing slightly.

But then something whizzed past your hiding place and jumped on the animal, tackling it on the ground. You gasped, hands flying to cover your mouth in an instant in order to stifle the noise. You were able to make out the shape of the creature. It looked nothing like an animal even if the way it tore off the deer’s flesh resembled a carnivore. If anything, it looked more like a disfigured human with no face. You tried to breathe as quietly as possible so as to not alert the creature. It didn’t have a face. It didn’t have eyes. But that didn’t mean it couldn’t hear you.

‘Probably the lack of some senses is compensated by the strength of others, like its ears.’ You thought to yourself as you breathed shakily into your palms.

Just like it came, it was gone, dragging the deer with it. To where you had no idea and you weren’t going to stick around to find out. You grabbed your bag and ran for it, not stopping for a second. You kept looking over your shoulder, thinking the monster would suddenly jump out from behind a bush or a tree and tackle you. You felt like it was watching you. Like it was just playing with you. Maybe it was just your imagination. Maybe it was just all in your head. But maybe it was real and this was just the creepiest “tag, you’re it” game you’ve ever played.

You ran and ran and ran until you reached your house, halting in front of it and giving the perimeter a scout with your eyes, hoping that you wouldn’t see the monster. When you didn’t see or hear anything, you let out the breath you were holding which sent you into a coughing fit. Only now did you feel the burning in your lungs.

After taking a couple of deep breaths and a moment to rest and calm down, the burning sensation was chased away and you could finally breathe normally. You silently entered home and cursed under your breath when you saw your father sprawled on the couch. You really wanted to leave and keep true to your threat of sleeping at a friend but you were so absolutely scared of going outside in the dark, not to mention exhausted, that you just wanted to curl under the covers and sleep it all off. But first, you needed a nice, long shower.

The shower helped your body relax. The tension was gone and replaced by calmness washing over you as you let the body wash and the hot water do their wonders. The pleasant sweet scent of [favorite scent] was welcomed after you had spent the past half an hour being able to smell only one thing – fear.

And it was definitely one of the most suffocating things you had the misfortune of exploring.

After drying your hair and throwing on some loose cotton pants and a t-shirt, you were ready to pass out. But your room seemed too big, dark, and empty. You did not have the courage to sleep here all alone. It was silly and you knew it. You were supposed to be braver. But sometimes you couldn’t stop fear from overtaking you and turning you into its prey. In such moments, all you needed was your family. So you didn’t hesitate to rush to your brother’s room, quietly opening the door and slithering in. You tiptoed to his bed and gently slid under the covers. He shifted a bit and turned around to face you.

“Did I wake you up?” you whispered guiltily and he shook his head.

“I wasn’t exactly asleep.”

The two of you lay in silence for a while until you decided to break it.

“I um… have something to tell you,” he propped himself up on one elbow in order to show he was all ears and you bit your lip as you tried recounting everything that happened. “Remember how me and mom saw that… thing in here a while back? And then she saw it again yesterday and judging by the hole in the wall, maybe she saw it today too?” you asked and he nodded. “Well… I was out in the forest until now and I saw it again,” you revealed and even in the dark you could see his eyes widening and filling with panic.

“Oh my God… Are you all right? I-it didn’t do anything to you, right?” he asked frantically and you sat up to grasp his shoulders and calm him down.

“I’m fine! It didn’t notice me. Then I ran when it went away.”

“W-what was it doing there?”

“Hunting? It took down a deer, tore it apart. I couldn’t very well see how because it had its back turned on me for the majority of the time. But the sounds of it all… Gosh, it was scary as hell,” you uttered and he engulfed your form in his arms. “I didn’t dare make a sound or move because I was too afraid it was going to hear me and come for me. I didn’t stop running after it left. I thought I would either c-choke to death or be torn to p-pieces. It was so scary,” you whined and his hold on you tightened.

“This thing is never going to hurt you, ok? Not while I’m around. I promise,” he muttered firmly in your hair and you nodded, burying yourself in his chest as you tried to calm down. “C’mon… try and get some sleep,” he whispered as he laid you back down and pulled the covers over you.

“I’ll be right here.”

“So, you and Nancy saw the same creature on the picture of Barb you had taken? And Nancy saw it near Steve’s house when she went to investigate?” you asked Jonathan as you were rummaging through your wardrobe for some black clothes and he nodded.

It was very early in the morning and nobody had woken up yet except you and Jonathan. You two were barely able to sleep for a couple of hours before waking up with the sunrise. Even if they were a couple of hours, it helped make you feel a bit better, considering you barely slept ever since Will’s disappearance. If you hadn’t passed out and slept for a whole night thanks to the drugs, you didn’t know how you could’ve properly operated now.

“I was thinking of going to investigate today. I’ll tell Nancy after the, uh… the funeral. I feel like she’d want to join me,” explained the boy and you bit your lip.

“Well, I’ll come with you. I suggest we get some weapons and practice shooting before going. We can’t go out there unprotected,” you offered.

“And you and Hopper went to the morgue to check the body? It really was a fake?” he asked quietly, hoping to hear your confirmation yet again.

You had told him about the fake body because you needed him on your side. You needed to team up in order to go against all this. And if Hopper didn’t return… then you really would need all the help you could get. So you told Jonathan and you had faith that he would keep it together and be able to help you.

Your mother on the other hand was a totally different story. You wanted to tell her so she could calm down but you were sure this would send her into another frenzy. Not to mention if she learned what you and your brother were planning on doing, she’d completely freak out and try to stop you. You were torn.

“Yes… it was a fake…”

Shortly after, you put on some black jeans, a black turtleneck and tied your hair in a ponytail before heading into the kitchen with Jonathan following you. He noticed the quick sneer you threw your father’s way and frowned. He didn’t want Lonnie here either. He hated him as much as you did. But Jonathan has always been more on the meek side. He wasn’t as expressive as you were about things. His hatred could be seen simmering within his eyes and in the twitching of his hands while in your case it was shown through glares, sneers, and sometimes curse words or sass.

He couldn’t blame you for not being able to hold back when it came to show your hatred for the man. You’ve experienced his abuse firsthand.

Not only would he get drunk and cheat on your mother but sometimes, when their arguments became too much, he would raise a hand to her. Rarely, but he’d still do it.

You have always done your best when it came to protecting Jonathan and Will, ushering them to hide in your room, the three of you staying there under the covers pretending it was a tent and you were outside camping and talking to each other, listening to loud music, trying to drown out the shouting. Many times you had tried being brave. When Lonnie would begin shouting at the boys for literally no reason, you would usher them into a room and begin arguing with Lonnie, going chest to chest. You always shifted his attention from the boys to you. You would insult him and belittle him, turning yourself into the main target so he could focus his anger and abuse on you instead. It was your duty as the oldest sibling. Most of the time, this would happen when your mother was at work. When she was present, what Lonnie did was neglect and ignore you. When he was alone with you, his disgusting side would show. On a couple of occasions, he’d even hit you. You had to beg Jonathan and Will not to tell anything to your mother because you didn’t want to worry her. You used to cover your bruised cheeks with foundation and your split lip with dark red lipstick.

Then one day, almost two years ago, things got way out of control. He and Joyce had gotten into a super bad argument. You and the boys had rushed into Will’s room, deciding to play music to drown out the shouting. But this had not given you peace of mind. You had been so tired of dealing with your father’s abuse you had wanted to put an end to everything. You had wanted your mother to finally divorce him.

The boys had been sitting on the bed, talking about funny things while listening to Will’s favorite song. You had your back glued to the door, arms crossed and one leg propped against it as you tried to listen to the shouting match through the music. Jonathan had given you a few signs to sit with them on the bed and join in on the storytelling in order to better distract Will. But something inside you had snapped that day. You couldn’t stand any of this any longer.

You had decided to go intervene in your parents’ argument. You had screamed out everything you thought and felt about the man and demanded they got a divorce. You had even pushed him away from your mother because he had been standing way too close for comfort. He had gotten so furious he backhanded you. The hit had been so hard it rattled your entire skull and sent you to the ground where you had hit your head one more time, knocking you out cold. Joyce had been absolutely outraged. Jonathan and Will who had been watching from behind a half-open door had immediately rushed to your side. Joyce had begun hitting Lonnie’s chest and screaming at him, joined by Jonathan shortly after, the two of them successfully managing to kick the man out of the house. In the meantime, Will had been crying and shaking as he tried to wake you up.

You had woken up sometime later with the most shattering headache ever, a burning cheek, and a split lip. Your bruises had taken a whole week to heal and your concussion had taken almost sixteen days to get rid of. You had had to struggle with dizziness, nausea, headaches, blurry vision, exhaustion, and sensitivity to light for some time and your family had to take care of you as if you were a baby and not the oldest sibling. You had never felt more vulnerable and useless.

Needless to say, your mother had contacted Hopper about it and he had acted out a restricting order. Lonnie couldn’t come close to any of you even after he tried apologizing many times after the incident. Your mother had filed for divorce. This incident had been the last straw. She easily had been able to take custody of all the children which eventually caused Lonnie to move out of town for good.

“What are you doing?” asked Jonathan quietly as he watched you open the fridge and take out different products.

“I’ll just make some sandwiches for the kids.”

“The kids? Are you thinking of going to the Wheelers?”

“Yepp.”

“Why?”

“I just have something to discuss with them,” you replied reservedly as you expertly cut tomatoes and ham. Your brother decided not to press you any further and silently came to help you make a couple of sandwiches.

“You’ll come to the funeral, right?” he asked hesitantly and you paused in your movements before nodding and resuming. “Ok… ok,” sighed the boy. “I know that this is a fake body that we’re burying but… we have to keep appearances as you said, right?”

“Right… Do me a favor and… don’t tell mom about the fake body yet. She’s probably going to freak out and refuse to have the funeral and that will draw attention on us. Bad attention,” you whispered as you wrapped each sandwich in a napkin before shoving them in a bag. “We have to keep playing their game, don’t we?” you gave him a tight smile before pecking his cheek and going to grab your black leather jacket, hurriedly leaving the house.

“Y/N?” Mike’s surprised voice greeted you as he opened the door. “W-what are you doing here? The funeral is in two hours!”

“I just want to talk to you, kids. You need to know some stuff that I learned,” you informed him and he let you in, leading you down to the basement where Eleven was sitting on the couch.

“Y/N,” she smiled when her eyes landed on you and you grinned, sitting next to her and giving her a side hug with your free arm which she shyly returned.

“I bring food alongside the news,” you lifted the fabric bag before placing it on the coffee table in front of you and digging out sandwiches for each of you.

“Oh, I love your sandwiches! I swear everyone always go to the diner you work at just so they can get your sandwiches and burgers!” exclaimed Mike as he quickly bit into the food and you smiled.

“I’m glad so many people ended up liking them. You gotta thank Amy for letting me integrate some of my recipes. The secret is all about the sauces,” you winked as you happily watched the children eat, smile growing when Eleven muttered ‘Delicious’ as she ate. “But I’m not here to talk about my recipes. I’m here to talk about Will. Are Dustin and Lucas coming? I don’t really wish to repeat the story.”

“Yeah, they should come any time now.”

Shortly after Mike had spoken out the words, the doorbell had rung and the two boys had joined you in the basement.

You told them all about your discovery yesterday. About the interrogation you and Hopper did, about his suspicions that higher-ups were involved in this, about Will’s fake body, and most importantly about the monster you had encountered in the forest last night. They had been quite terrified about the turn of events but showed bravery nonetheless. They, in turn, told you about all conclusions and suspicions they had formed about the whole situation and about sneaking Eleven into the school and having her use the ham radio to channel Will. And now they had gotten the idea of speaking to Mr. Clarke and ask for information about the Upside Down.

An hour and a half had passed as quickly as someone snapping their fingers and Mike had to go get ready for the funeral, leaving you four at the basement. Dustin and Lucas decided to occupy themselves with some game, leaving you and Eleven sitting in silence.

“You know, if you ever get tired of the boys you can always come to me. We can spend some time together, go pick pretty clothes, do each other’s hair; that kinda stuff. Just have fun, us girls,” you smiled at her and she returned it as she reached to grasp a strand of your hair, then moved her hand to your face and softly traced the lines of your features before quickly withdrawing her hand.

“Pretty,” she muttered and you gave her a big smile as you did the same, finger tracing the side of her face and bopping her on the nose before you withdrew it.

“Pretty,” you said and she smiled before closing in on herself again. You pitied the poor girl. It was obvious that she didn’t have a normal childhood and was traumatized beyond belief. She couldn’t even speak properly. You couldn’t even fathom what kind of disgusting people would keep a child and abuse it and prevent it from learning. You wanted to do anything in your power to protect her and shower her with the love and care she needed and deserved.

Bad people.

You wondered if these bad people were the same who fucked up with the monster and got Will into this mess. Who else could it have been?

“Say… are the bad people you were talking about the same who created this whole mess?” you asked after a while and she hesitated for quite some time before nodding. “Who are they? The NSA? The Department of Energy?” she shook her head. “Was it the scientists? From Hawkins Lab?” you whispered and her eyes snapped to look at you, filling with fear.

Your face fell.

“Don’t tell,” she whispered as her eyes shifted to look at Dustin and Lucas who were busy laughing about something and you nodded in understanding.

If the boys knew that the lab was for real responsible for this whole mess, they would definitely go straight there in a reckless attempt to investigate. You really didn’t need anyone else to follow in Hopper’s footsteps. Especially children. It was probably better if they stuck with the “suspicions that higher-ups were involved” narrative for now. Eleven probably thought the same which is why she hasn’t told the boys about her entanglement with the lab yet.  

“It’s time to go!” came Karen’s voice, interrupting your train of thought.

You gave Eleven a tight hug, rubbing her back soothingly.

“We are going to fix this… I promise.”

You went to the funeral.

Even though there were a couple of moments when you had hesitated.

You didn’t approach the crowd of people standing in front of the open grave and the casket. You stood far away from them all, not caring what any of them would think. To be fair they would probably think you were too upset and in denial or something. All you could focus on now was the Hawkins Lab, Eleven, the monster, and Hopper.

Gosh, Hopper. You had forgotten about him for some time there. He didn’t call. He didn’t show up at the funeral either. Heavy worry was nestling itself in the pit of your stomach. You already wished for this farce of a funeral to end so you could get in your car and go hunt that monster and find your brother. A familiar figure entered your vision, interrupting your thoughts.

“Hey,” greeted Steve awkwardly and you gave him a small smile.

“Hi.”

He came to stand in front of you and looked at his feet, seemingly gathering some courage in order to properly face you.

“I, uh… I’m really sorry… about the camera incident,” he finally uttered as he lifted his gaze and locked it with yours. “I acted way out of line. You were right that the issue could’ve been handled in a peaceful way instead of with humiliation and breaking things,” he admitted and you gave him a tired, close-eyed smile.

“It’s all right, Steve. I know you were just being overprotective and jumping to action before thinking with your brain, as you always do. You just have to work on that-”

“I know! I will… I will,” he looked bashfully at the ground.

“I’m not the only one who you should be apologizing to, though,” you sighed as you nodded your head in the direction of your brother.

“Yeah… I plan on doing that.”

The two of you sat in silence for a while as you observed the people standing up to leave and throw roses into the gaping hole in the earth.

“I’m sorry about your brother,” murmured Steve and you shook your head.

“There’s nothing to be sorry for… That’s life for you,” you whispered as you looked down at your foot that was drawing patterns into the dirt.

Suddenly, you felt strong arms engulf your body, startling you.

“Don’t bullshit me… you loved that boy more than anything. Just… admit that you miss him and that you wish he was here. Cry, scream, anything. Don’t lock yourself off like that,” he muttered in your hair and you sighed as you rested your chin on his shoulder, arms going to grasp at his sweatshirt.

“I do miss him,” you whispered and he hummed.

You stayed like this for some time.

You could feel he was about to say something when your eyes landed on Mike, Dustin and Lucas, following Mr. Clarke.

“Excuse me, Steve, I gotta go,” you apologized as you broke the hug and hurried to leave his side and follow the boys, leaving him to stand there in utter confusion.

“We have questions… A lot of questions,” you heard Mike say to Mr. Clarke after you entered the building and noticed them standing not far away from you. You briskly walked towards them as they headed for a nearby table to sit at.

“Y/N,” greeted Mr. Clarke as he stood up to face you. “My condolences,” he offered his hand and you politely shook it.

“Thank you very much. I hope you don’t mind me joining you? I gotta look after them,” you smiled and he nodded, pointing at a free seat next to Lucas.

“So, you know how in Cosmos, Carl Sagan talks about other dimensions?” Mike didn’t beat around the bush and asked as soon as all of you gathered around the table. “Like, beyond our world?”  

“Yeah, sure. Theoretically.”

“Right, theoretically!”

“So, theoretically… How do we travel there?” inquired Lucas.

“You guys have been thinking about Hugh Everett’s Many-Worlds interpretation, haven’t you? Y/N, was it you who got them into it? I remember you being into that kind of material at one point,” lifted a brow the teacher and you chuckled.

“Well, you know me. I’m very much into Iron Man, have been since I was a kid, so there were a couple of times when I dived into engineering and physics. Then I jumped into the different subdivisions like nuclear physics, relativity, quantum mechanics,” you shrugged and the boys gaped at you in what you assumed was awestruck admiration. “But you know, I feel like history, archeology, anthropology, languages, and that kinda jazz is more my thing,” you cleared your throat and shifted in your seat, crossing your legs. “So what was Everett’s Many-Worlds interpretation about? It was something about parallel worlds? Parallel dimensions?” you tilted your head as you crossed your arms, rocking lightly in the chair as you picked your brain so you could remember what you had read about this.

“Yeah, exactly! It’s about parallel universes. He theorizes that there are parallels that exist, just like our world, but different infinite variations of it,” he explained. “Which means there’s a world out there where none of this tragic stuff ever happened.”

“Yeah, that’s not what we’re talking about.”

“We were thinking of more of an evil dimension, like the Vale of Shadows,” intervened Dustin. “You know the Vale of Shadows?”

“An echo of the Material Plane where necrotic and shadow magic-“

“Yeah, exactly! If that did exist, a place like the Vale of Shadows, how would we travel there?” blurted out Mike and the teacher sank into a moment of deep thought before fishing out a paper plate and plucking a pen out of his pocket.

“Well… Picture an acrobat standing on a tightrope,” he described. “Now, the tightrope is our dimension. And our dimension has rules. You can move forwards or backward… But what if right next to our acrobat, there is a flea? Now, the flea can also travel back and forth, just like the acrobat. But here’s when things get really interesting. The flea can also travel this way-” he showcased. “-along the side of the rope. He can even go underneath the rope.”

“Upside down,” all of you muttered simultaneously and the man nodded with a smile.

“Exactly!”

“Ok, so we have these parallel worlds and one of them is obviously more flexible than the other. They are the flea, we are the acrobat. We can’t go to the… Upside Down… The question is, how is a connection made between the worlds that allow mingling to occur? That allows the flea to reach the acrobat? Is it like some sort of a tunnel? A wormhole? A… a gate?” you tried putting your thoughts into words and Mr. Clarke hummed.

“Well, you are correct. It would be impossible for us to travel to this place. Now, I don’t know why you’d suggest that the flea could be able to travel to here because that’s also impossible-“

“Let’s say it’s just a theory,” you intercepted.

“But let’s say that there is a way to form such a connection between the worlds that will allow the flea to travel to the acrobat and the other way round. You’d have to create a massive amount of energy. More than what humans are currently capable of creating, mind you, to open up some kind of tear in time and space. And then,” he folded the paper plate and pierced it with his pen. “You create the doorway.”

“A gate,” voiced Dustin and Mr. Clarke nodded.

“Yeah… but as you said, this is only…”

“Theoretical!”

“I have another thing to ask,” you pondered. “Let’s say that, as I already theorized, a connection – a gate – already exists. How do we… recognize it? How do we find it?”

“Well, I think if such a gate existed, we’d already know. It would disrupt gravity, the magnetic field, our environment. Heck, it might even swallow us up whole,” the last sentence sent you into a stupor.

This whole time, Will has been stuck in a whole other dimension. Another dimension right next to yours that you didn’t know how to access. Obviously, there was a gate. But that gate could be anywhere. It could have opened in the corner of some abandoned building for all you knew. It would take you days to search every nook and cranny in Hawkins, not to mention the outskirts and the forests. Days that could very well be Will’s last days alive because he was all alone in there, being hunted by a monster.

“Y/N!” someone snapped their fingers in front of your face, jerking you out of your zoned-out state.

“Are you all right?” asked Lucas and you gulped, nodding.

“Yeah… yeah, I’m… fine… I need to… go find my brother,” you smiled tightly as you stood up and excused yourself. “Thanks for coming, Mr. Clarke. And thanks for the explanation.”

The more you thought about where the gate could be located as you hurried to reach your car, the more you began realizing some things. For example, the monster took Barbara from Steve’s backyard. The following day, Nancy saw it nearby Steve’s house. Last night it appeared in the forest area near your house which wasn’t that far away from the Harrington’s residence. It had appeared in your house three times now too. And Will… it must have snatched Will right from the shed back home. There was a certain perimeter that the monster roamed through which meant the gate was somewhere in that forest area.

If this theory turned out to be true, that would save you a couple of days worth of searching. You were sure that Jonathan and Nancy would have cracked this by now and you were right. You bumped into them on your way to your car and Jonathan had explained to you exactly what you had been thinking about.

“It’s a good thing that we all share the same brain cell,” you joked and the two smiled. “So, you found a weapon?”

“Yeah,” he showed you the gun and you nodded in approval.

“Alright, I’ll go back home and grab the one we have. We’re gonna need more than one. Then I’ll come find you, ok? Take this,” you instructed your brother as you pulled a walkie-talkie out of your bag and shoved it into his hands. “The kids actually have some brilliant ideas, you know? They easily communicate with those even if they are far away from one another. I’ll be able to find you quickly.”

Earlier this morning you had fished Will’s walkie-talkie from underneath his bed because you had the feeling that you would need a little help with communication. And now your intuition proved to have been correct. You gave Jonathan Will’s walkie-talkie while you kept your own in your bag.

You had gotten one back when the kids got obsessed with them because Will had insisted you have one as well. You had to admit it was actually quite ingenious because you were able to communicate even if you were far away from each other. It was better than a phone because it was just as effective and not as expensive. And gods, mobile phones were extremely expensive – something only rich people could afford.

“See you out there, sis.”

“See you.”

A month ago

“Kid? What are you doing here?” asked Hopper with a tone and expression that were a mixture of curiosity and a tinge of worry.

“I need a… I need a favor,” you fidgeted as you looked at your feet. “Do you think you can… teach me how to shoot a gun?”

“Where is this coming from?” he asked gently as he came to stand in front of you. “Hey?” he put a hand on your shoulder and squeezed in order to grab your attention, lowering himself a bit so he can get a better look at your face once you finally lifted it to meet his. “I know it’s a dumb question but… is everything alright?” 

“It’s just that… The defense techniques and the combat you taught me are useful… when I’m against one or two people… not four,” you muttered and he shut his eyes in anguish, letting out a long sigh. “I need to be able to protect myself better; and my family if need be.”

“You’re under eighteen. You don’t have the right to own a weapon yet,” he drawled tiredly.

“That didn’t stop my fa… Lonnie, from buying one for me,” you crossed your arms as your foot kicked an invisible pebble.

“Yeah, ‘cause he is a psychopath,” groaned the man and you let out a small smile.

“It’s not like I’m gonna carry a weapon with me whenever I go. I know it’s illegal. I just… I just want to learn. I want to have the knowledge…just in case. Besides…I’ll be eighteen soon anyways.”

 “Alright… fine…” he relented. “But just. a little. practice…ok? You’re not gonna be using any weapons outside of that. We’re gonna set some rules and you’re gonna follow them if you want to learn,” he waved a finger and you nodded at his ultimatums.

“Thanks; old man.”

BANG!

“Whoa… didn’t know you could shoot,” praised Jonathan and you smirked. You couldn’t wait to rub it in Hopper’s face. He hadn’t been hard to convince to teach you per se, but he had been so strict during the couple of practices you had and he’d made sure to always remind you of the rules and lecture you. You weren’t an idiot. You understood very well what you could and couldn’t do. You had self-control and were able to respect the set boundaries and law, yet he treated you like a child.

You wanted to kill the damn monster, throw it at his feet and say ‘See? I told you those skills would come in handy.’ But you weren’t sure if you’d be able to do that. You weren’t sure because he might not even be alive. You weren’t sure because you might end up dead on this little monster-hunting trip you were preparing to set out on.

BANG!

Another shot was fired, pulling you out of your rotten with worry thoughts.

“You’re getting better and better, Nancy. You’re definitely a natural,” you complimented and she smiled bashfully.

Only your poor brother seemed to struggle with shooting. But that was all right. As long as you had two people on the team who could be the offense, it was good if there was someone who was the defense and the lookout.

“I think it’s time we get going. Let’s not waste daylight.”

But you had ended up wasting the daylight. You had spent hours looking throughout the forest, hoping to find the gate, but you had come out empty-handed. You had to listen to Jonathan and Nancy’s talking for most of the time, cringing when your brother had begun talking about the picture and describing what he had seen in Nancy who had in turn gotten defensive and the two of them deflated, leaving an awkward feeling to creep in the atmosphere of your group.

“Can you stop?” asked your brother as he pulled the cigarette out of your mouth, making you frown.

“What’s the big deal? You know that I smoke.”

“But never this much. You’re practically leaving a trail of cigarette butts.”

“Well, if we get lost or snatched by the monster into its world, at least people will be able to track us down thanks to my trail of crumbs,” you sassed. “So, don’t be a sourpuss, Hansel! Trust the process!” you lightly elbowed his side in an attempt to diffuse the tension and worry that had engulfed your group after the falling of the night. Not that you hadn’t been tense and worried when you had set on this journey but the darkness made it all the eerier and the fear that had suffocated you last night began creeping back in bit by bit.  

“It’s not funny,” he berated you grumpily and you just ruffled his hair before walking ahead of him, the three of you moving in silence for a couple of minutes before you heard Nancy and Jonathan stop. “What, are you tired?” asked the boy and you turned to look at them in confusion.

“Shut up,” hushed him Nancy as she looked around.

“What?”

“I heard something.”

You strained your ears and you really did catch a distant sound that was similar to wailing. The three of you followed it and shortly after you stumbled upon a wounded deer.

“Oh, God,” whispered the girl as she and Jonathan got closer to the body, illuminating it with their flashlights. But this scenario was too familiar to you. Your body shuddered and you immediately pulled out your gun, head turning left and right sharply, scouting the perimeter for threats.

“It’s been hit by a car… We can’t just leave it,” Nancy’s voice made you snap your head in their direction, eyes widening when you saw they had kneeled right next to the deer, touching it.

“You idiots!” you hissed as you rushed to their side, grabbing Jonathan by the collar of his jacket and Nancy by her arm, pulling them up and dragging them away. “Do you have a death wish!?”

“W-what are you talking about?”

“Just stay quiet and move away!” you whisper shouted as you dragged them further away from the body, the three of you gluing yourselves to the trees and waiting in silence. You could see Nancy wanted to say something but before she had the chance to open her mouth, the deer squealed as something snatched her away, making you all jump in fright and look at one another.

“As I said… hunting!” you whispered snippily and the others gulped nervously.

The three cautiously began following the trail of blood and bones, hoping to find the body and possibly the monster but it was nowhere to be found.

“Where did it go?”

“I don’t know… Do you see any more blood?”

“No…”

Jonathan went to look in one direction, Nancy went to check another, and you were left standing in the middle, not knowing who to follow. You weren’t supposed to separate. You had to stick together. You cursed under your breath as you decided to follow Nancy. A minute or so later you found her kneeling at the base of a tree and you approached her with a confused frown.

“What are you doing?” you asked as you joined her on the ground and your eyes widened when they landed on the opening in the tree, covered in what seemed to be vines and slime. The sound of distant growling sent shivers down your spine. “You found it,” you whispered. “You found the gate! Still think I’m crazy?” you asked with raised eyebrows and she gave you an apologetic smile.

While you three had roamed the forest earlier, you had caught up Nancy and Jonathan on what you believed about parallel worlds and how you thought that the monster came from one and that it had most possibly dragged Will and Barb in there. They had been skeptical about it and you couldn’t really blame them but it always felt good when people got the proof they wanted and you got to tell them ‘I told you so’.

Before you could say anything, Nancy crawled closer to the gate and thrust her arm past the barrier.

“What are you doing?” you snapped in panic.

“I’m going in-“

“You think I’m gonna let you go in an unknown place alone?” you tsk-ed as you grabbed her arm and pulled her away. “I’m not letting you take such a risk… If you want to go in, do it. But I’m going in first and making sure it’s safe… Or as safe as it could be considering there’s probably a monster in there,” you sighed as you took her place, not giving her a chance to protest, and pushed through the slimy membrane seemingly without hesitation and with full on bravery on the outside but with rapidly beating heart and panic on the inside.

To say it was disgusting as your whole body passed through unknown substances was the understatement of the century.

You were glad when it was finally over and you crawled out of the constrictive tunnel. You were quick to stand up and look around. For a second you thought you were tripping because this place was the absolutely same as the one you came from. It was the same forest with the only difference being that it was darker, eerier, with more blue tones and lots of what seemed to be slimy vines and cobwebs covering the whole area. There were also some kind of particles floating around, falling like snow, which unnerved you.

You were about to give Nancy a signal that she could join you but when you turned around you saw her already crawling out of the hole and standing up, looking around with the same confusion as you. She was about to say something but you raised a finger to your mouth, signaling her to be quiet, and the two began moving and exploring the place.     

Your trek didn’t last long as a sharp sound made you whirl and point your flashlights at the source. You gaped in shock as you saw the back of the monster too busy munching on its prey to notice you… yet. Memories from last night invaded your brain and you had to clench your hand into a fist in order to stop the shaking. Your flashlights began flickering which only added to the scary situation you were stuck in. Nancy took a couple of steps back and you were about to follow her example when you heard her step on something, the sound of squelching echoing all around. The monster reeled its head in your direction and roared.

Your body ran cold.

You hadn’t been able to properly see how it had torn the deer last night. You had wondered how it was able to do it when you hadn’t seen a mouth. But now you got the explanation you needed. Its whole head was just a gigantic mouth that resembled a flower as it opened. It was one of the most disturbing things you have seen.

“Jonathan!” screeched Nancy as she dropped the flashlight and began running. You cursed as your eyes snapped between the gate and her retreating form and you quickly followed after her, cursing again as you began losing sight of her, her silhouette disappearing between the multiple trees.

She kept screaming Jonathan’s name which to an extent helped you locate her but you also wanted to scold her for all the screaming because if you could locate her thanks to it, then the monster surely could as well. She was drawing all the attention onto herself and she was going to end up dead because of it.

You breathed heavily as you ran, eyes squinting in the dark as you tried to find her. When you finally did, you let out a sharp relieved exhale and you forced your legs to run faster. She shrieked when you grabbed her arm and you clasped a hand over her mouth before shoving her body against a tree, keeping her and yourself very still as you heard the monster come closer and stop near you on the other side of the tree. You heard it stroll slowly as it tried to figure out where you had hidden. You steadied your ragged breathing and pinned Nancy with a look, warning her to be quiet as you waited for the monster to go away.

When it did, you let go of her and nodded with your head in the direction of the gate. It wasn’t very far and you could hear your brother calling your names on the other side. You sprinted towards the tree and threw yourselves on the ground. You didn’t hesitate to push Nancy forward, practically shoving her into the tunnel and pushing her into Jonathan’s waiting arms on the other side. Your head snapped to look behind you as you heard the growling and screeching of the monster sounding too close for comfort. When you saw that Nancy had fully passed, you quickly followed after her. You have never crawled that fast in your life and you have never been this relieved to be back in the familiar forest.

“Oh, God,” muttered Jonathan shakily as you crawled out and he quickly pulled you far away from the gate and into his arms, hugging you tightly. “Don’t you ever do that!” he snapped wobbly and you nodded against his shoulder as you let out shuddering breaths and tried to calm down, the three of you hugging each other tightly as if afraid someone was going to disappear.  

Now you knew what the animals felt like when hunters like your father mercilessly chased them for the thrill of the kill.  

[schrijverr]

Tomorrow Will Be Different 26

Chapter 26 out of 26

Instead of managing to meet up later, Oliver has to keep running with Akio. The only way to keep them safe is to go public with Oliver being alive, leaving him back home in charge of Akio, while Tatsu and Maseo are still in the wind

In this chapter, the Yamashiros leave and Oliver decides what the next part of his life will look like.

On AO3.

Ships: Tatsu x Maseo, minor Tommy x Laurel

Warnings: mentions of panic attacks and ptsd

~~~

Chapter 26: Dealing with Them Being Gone

On the tarmac, it isn’t any less strange than it had been two days earlier in the court house that he isn’t going to be in close quarters with Akio or Tatsu and Maseo anymore.

But he keeps that strangeness to himself. They finally have each other again, they’re going home. They don’t need him being weird about it. Besides, it’s not like he’s going to lose them forever, there will just be a little more distance between them.

He hugs Akio tightly and says: “God, you’re gonna do great, Akio. I just know it. Give it some time and call me whenever you need, okay?”

“Okay,” Akio agrees, hugging him back. “You can also call me whenever you need.”

The gesture makes Oliver smile and he tightens his grip for a second. “Thank you, buddy. I’ll remember that.”

They let go and Akio seriously says: “Don’t get sad and grumpy without me. Your face looks weird when you frown.”

“Thank you,” Oliver chuckles. “I’ll try not to. Be good for your parents.”

“Yes, sir,” Akio salutes, something Diggle taught him.

Oliver shakes his head with a grin, ruffling Akio’s hair, before turning to Tatsu and Maseo. He hesitates for a moment, but Maseo moves first, puling him into a hug. “Thank you again for all you have done for us. If there ever is anything we can do, please, allow us to help.”

“It wasn’t a hardship,” Oliver replies. “Thank you for looking out for me the past year.”

They let go, both looking each other in eye, before giving one another a sharp nod, then they step back and Oliver moves to hug Tatsu. He doesn’t expect much, a brief hug at most, but she surprises him by pulling him close.

“Thank you so much for watching out for my Akio,” she whispers. “You’ll always have a home and a family with us.”

Now Oliver is getting choked up, while he told himself not to cry. He pushes it all down, though can’t help but hug Tatsu tighter as he replies: “Thank you for letting me into your home. I’m a better man for it. Akio is lucky to have you as parents.”

Behind them, Akio is saying goodbye to Diggle, while Tatsu moves to thank Moira and Thea, who have come as well, with her husband once Oliver lets go.

When they’re done with that, they board the plane. The Queens have loaned out their jet to them for this trip, wanting to ensure they had a comfortable flight without curious fellow passengers or paparazzi following them all the way to the gate.

Oliver stands next to his mom and sister, Diggle half a step behind him. There is more space between him and Thea than him and Diggle, but he’s getting there.

Neither of his mom nor his sister know of his panic attack at the courthouse and he’s planning on keeping it that way. He doesn’t want them to worry and he doesn’t want them to ask questions. He just wants to go back to always being fine, like he used to be before he left. He wants to get the good pieces from then back.

Diggle clearly disagrees, as did Tatsu and Maseo when he told them not to mention it, but Oliver doesn’t care. With Akio and his parents back to Japan, he craves a normal and his normal has never involved his mom and sister worrying about him like that.

So, Oliver puts all that undercover work to use and plasters on his best brave face as they wave the plane goodbye.

Akio is pressed up against the glass of his seat the best he can, grinning and waving. Oliver imprints it the best he can. He knows it’s not the last time he’ll see Akio, but it somehow feels like it, like an ending.

As the plane disappears from view, it hits Oliver that it is definitively over. He completed his mission.

The thought creates an empty pit in his chest. Ever since Tatsu and Maseo returned, it has been growing, that feeling of unease, but he’s been able to push it down with the thought that he was still responsible for them here. That is now gone.

Oliver is without a mission. It is over. He is home completely. Nothing standing between him and life as he knew it.

It’s terrifying.

His nightmares have already been bad ever since he got home, however, the panic attack didn’t happen until the courthouse, until his mission was almost done. Not having a mission only makes him more anxious and the only way to make it better is to think of his plans as a vigilante.

These plans to become a vigilante are not ones he can talk about. Diggle might be a good asset later on, but he can’t have him stop him before it’s off the ground. It’s something he needs.

Not just to keep the anxiety away or to let out the darker parts inside of him, but to do good as well, to make his father proud.

He still hasn’t forgotten the video his father left him that he found when breaking into QC for A.R.G.U.S., nor what he said in the boat, nor the sacrifice he made so that Oliver could live. These past three years have made it difficult to do right by him, but now that he is no longer responsible for Akio, he can. There is no one dependent on him, should it go wrong.

The latter part is another reason he probably shouldn’t tell anyone about his plans. He knows people will care if he gets caught or hurt, but it’s not the same as someone relying solely on him to look out for them.

He has to reconsider the importance of others in his life when they get back home. Tommy is sitting in the living room, grinning when the come in. “What are you doing here?” Oliver asks.

“Well, as I predicted you got empty nest syndrome the second Akio left and have been pouting ever since,” Thea says. “As your kindhearted and generous sister, I organized board game night to cheer you up.”

His two siblings – because let’s be honest, Tommy is family – have organized this for him. They’ve gone out of their way to make him feel better, to do something with the three of them. They care so deeply about him and he’s planning on getting caught into something dangerous just to make himself feel better.

It’s selfish in a way and he starts to doubt if he should go through with it. Akio might not rely on him anymore, but these people still care. They rely on him in different ways and will be upset if something happens to him.

All of it makes it so that Oliver chokes up slightly, but he luckily doesn’t have to do anything with those emotions, because Tommy says: “I suggested making a custom castaway card for the Game of Life, but Speedy vetoed it.”

“I suggested teen adoption instead,” Thea smirks.

“Both of you suck,” Oliver informs them happily, plopping down on the couch as he declares: “I want to play Ludo.”

“Ugh, you are so boring,” Thea groans as she gets out the Ludo to set up.

“I call playing green,” Tommy says.

“Hey, I wanted green,” Oliver pouts.

“No, you always play blue. I play green.”

“Maybe I want to play green now. I feel like I have the right to first pick today.”

“Oh, I see how it’s going to be, huh, pulling out that card?”

Thea interrupts their familiar bickering: “If both of you are going to be twelve years old about it, then I’m playing green.”

“You no longer want to play red?” Oliver asks.

“I do, but not if you’re going to be a baby about it,” Thea grins.

Oliver narrows his eyes at her, then turns to Tommy and says: “I play green,” snatching the pieces out of the box.

Tommy rolls his eyes, but he’s grinning. “Alright, I’ll play yellow. But I call dibs on green next game. Deal?”

“Deal.”

They play three rounds of Ludo, which Oliver wins none of. He always sucked at Ludo and he had half thought that with the strategy he’d learned, he would finally find the secret, but no such luck. So, he forces them into playing Risk after, gleefully wiping the floor with them.

It’s after they’ve gone two rounds of Risk and are setting up for the next round, while Thea goes to get them snacks, that the happy atmosphere breaks.

Tommy glances around and says: “How are you doing, man?”

“Good,” Oliver replies, cautious at the tone. “I miss Akio, but this is nice. Thank you for coming and doing this.”

“Of course,” Tommy smiles, before his face turns serious again. “Laurel mentioned your freak out at the courthouse, but when I asked your mom how you were doing, she didn’t seem to know a thing about it.”

“You told her?” Oliver panics slightly at that. He wants to hide that from them, Laurel – and now Tommy knowing – is already too many people.

“No, no, just implied, but I got not reaction,” Tommy says. “Dude, are you hiding this?”

“What? No. …Maybe,” Oliver clears his throat. “You can’t tell them, Tommy. I don’t want to worry them. It was just a one off thing. Nothing big. I don’t want it to be something big.”

“It sounded like something big, dude. I mean, Laurel said you were completely out of it, struggling against your bodyguard and needing two people to calm you down. That is something big. You can’t just brush it off.”

“Yes, I can. I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Come on, Ollie. You can talk to me,” Tommy implores.

And in that moment, Oliver realizes he can’t. He can never open up about any part of it, ever. Even if fictionalized slightly to fit with his story. He can’t break the view they have of him, he can’t ruin the memories they have of Ollie.

He carries a darkness, created from the things he’s had to do in order to survive. It has become a part of him. Oliver doesn’t know who he is without it. But it’s not a nice thing, not a savory thing about him.

If anyone here knew the things he has done, they’d be horrified, rightfully so, maybe even scared of him too, and he wouldn’t be able to blame them. No matter how hard he tries, he isn’t made to fit in with polite company.

Tonight has been a taste of the good times, of the simpler years he lived. However, it is never the same as it used to be.

Thea has been way too agreeable, trying to cheer him up and Tommy is now inquiring about how he is, genuinely concerned something is deeply wrong with him. Even in this lighthearted moment, those years and how they changed him hang over him.

He is trying to wave away his episode at the courthouse, saying it was a one off, but he doesn’t know that. If he doesn’t do what he has planned for himself, that might become his life and the thought is terrifying.

The only person he has here now that might understand is Diggle and even he doesn’t fully know or understand what Oliver went through. He’s proven himself ready to support Oliver, help him through this, but Oliver isn’t ready to face that.

He doesn’t want to have more of those attacks, doesn’t want to find an outlet for all that is caught up inside of him. What if he lashes out because he hasn’t found anything yet and someone gets hurt? He already nearly killed Diggle earlier, what if it had been someone more breakable like Thea? He can’t risk that.

No, Oliver needs the outlet, needs the mission to keep him sane. He needs to do right by his city and his father. This is the way to do all of this in one. Keeping the bad men away has been the only skill he has gained these three years that is actually good, he should do that.

All these realizations wash over him in the split second after Tommy tells him he can talk to him about what’s happening.

He blinks himself back into the present and tries to be as reassuring as possible with his expression as he replies: “Tommy, I appreciate it, really. But there’s nothing to talk about. I’m fine. Truly. It wasn’t anything big. Laurel arrived later than the main thing, the rumors got out of hand.”

Tommy doesn’t look like he believes him, so Oliver pleads: “Please, I’ve already put mom and Thea through so much. I don’t want to worry them when it was nothing. I have it handled.”

Thea comes back with snacks before Tommy can reply. She looks between the two of them and asks: “Did something happen? You both look so serious.”

Oliver looks at Tommy, holding his breath as he waits to see what he’ll say. After a beat, Tommy answers: “I just realized how long Ollie has gone without sex. That’s something horrible to mourn, Thea.”

“Ugh, you’re both gross,” Thea wrinkles her nose. “I don’t wanna talk about Ollie’s sex life – or lack there off – let’s play more Risk.”

“Ready for me to kick your ass again?” Oliver gloats, happy for the deflection. Tommy has always been the one better at coming up with excuses.

“As if. Those two times were just luck,” Thea says.

The rest of the board game night passes in a good mood, but Oliver is aware of what his future will hold and he’s sure both Tommy and Thea feel the sudden barrier that has been erected between them.

But Oliver doesn’t acknowledge it. He was a fool to think that barrier wouldn’t be there, that he could just fit back in to his old life.

He’ll still try, of course. He’ll play at who he used to be, because that person can never be who he is now or who he is planning on becoming. He’ll need a cover and his old life is perfect. But those closest to him will feel that it’s not the same. It’ll hurt both them and him, but it’s the way it has to be.

The next day, he goes out to the Glades, using covert tactics to get the supplies he needs as he starts to set up a base of operations.

Within days, he’s in business. His father’s notebook is on the table, open on the relevant page. Tonight he’ll start with the first name he plans to cross off: Adam Hunt.

~~

A/N:

It’ll likely play out a little different than the first season of the show itself, but I will leave that up to your imagination, because this is the part of the story I wanted to tell. Thank you so much for sticking with me for it’s entirety and congrats on reading 100-ish pages xp