#I don’t hate them. but I sure as hell am judging them.

[randum-famdoms]

I can’t hate old people because I literally agree with them on shit. Like, I don’t need a fucking robot in my house listening to me? Why would I want an Alexa or Google home or whatever other shit like that exists. I literally have a fucking phone and fingers. It’s in my pocket or within reach constantly. I don’t need a smart home, I can get my ass up and turn my lights off and on. Seriously, we’re advanced enough as is.

I understand their uses in homes where individuals are more impaired, be it not being able to easily get up or having poor dexterity in their fingers (such as from dyspraxia, being a wheelchair user, etc). But I’m not. And most of the people I know with an Alexa/smart home/whatever also aren’t.

I don’t hate people who use things like that. I just don’t see the point and sometimes people look at me weird when I say I don’t see the point in it, and suddenly I get the urge to scream at them to get off my lawn despite being in a college classroom.

So yeah. Old people and I may not agree on everything, but in one thing we are united: judging the youths for their silly tech gadgets

[chatonfils]

Starting off by saying I hate “mom Danny” bc it tends to be p transphobic and misgendering, so if anyone adds it to my post I’m blocking them.

Tim making his Kon clone baby, but the cloning chamber isn’t stable enough for the fetus. He’s desperately trying anything that he think might work, when he comes across Phantom. Phantom who has experience with stabilizing clones.

Danny had heard whispers through the grapevine (Ellie who’d joined the Teen Titans as Phantasm) that there was someone attempting to make clones. He’d only meant to snoop and see if it was a Vlad situation. If any clones had been made and needed liberating. What he found was a newly minted Red Robin crying over a red blinking message on a cloning chamber. He warbled a quiet “please, Kon, I don’t want to live without you.”

Danny quickly realizing this wasn’t an attempt to replace and destroy, but actually someone grieving, in probably an unhealthy way, but who was Danny to judge, he’d once replaced Sam and Tucker with robots for less. So he decided to help Red Robin out. Sure, he hadn’t dealt with kryptonian dna before, but he was at least 89% sure halfa dna was way more complicated. And Red Robin had already figured out ways around the dna shenanigans, it was just the stability that wasn’t going well. Honestly, he didn’t think it would be as easy as an ecto dejecto like it had been for Ellie. But his parents had a lot of inventions that they’d started making to help out ghosts, once they’d realized Danny was Phantom. Maybe telling Red Robin about ghost IVF wasn’t his most thought through plan.

“I think what might help is an incubator.” Phantom had suggested.

Tim could only gesture at the cloning chambers that had failed him thus far. They were essentially huge incubators.

Phantom awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck. “I meant, like, a living incubator. Like a surrogate.”

“Where am I going to find someone that I not only trust to carry the baby, but also would volunteer?” Tim raised an eyebrow at him. Hell, had Tim had the equipment to do so, he would have carried the baby, everything else be damned. He just didn’t want to be alone anymore.

Phantom blushed green and looked away. “It might take a little tinkering with the embryos to work with the physiology, but…. I could carry the baby for you. I mean, I’m trans, and even if I wasn’t, ghosts are kind of malleable in a reproductive sense. And there are options for IVF in ghost science. And like, my own clone is like my little sister. I’m also a protection spirit, so I would protect the baby with my entire afterlife. And I’m kind of rambling so you should say something before I embarrass myself.”

“You would be willing to carry a baby for me?” Tim was shell shocked by the offer.

“I mean, yeah. You’re a good guy. You’re not cloning him for a malicious reason. You’re just trying to bring back a piece of your friend because you love and miss him. Dedication that strong for someone who has left the living plain, is admirable. You realized early on that you wouldn’t be able to increase the speed in which the clone grew. You’ve been trying despite knowing that this clone will be a baby that’s going to be your child, and not just the friend you lost. And I wouldn’t mind giving up my body for a little bit so you can make your family.”

Tim certainly hadn’t meant to surge forward and kiss Phantom. “Thank you.” Tim pulled Phantom into a fierce hug. “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”

It took about a month for them to work out the kinks of making the baby safe for Danny’s body. In this time, Danny showing Red Robin his human form, and Tim revealing his own identity. It felt kind of wrong to keep his name from someone he intended to get pregnant with his child. Tim and Danny got close as they worked together on the baby. And there may have been a few more kisses shared between them. In the end, the baby ended up spliced with mostly Kon’s dna, some of Tim’s (to stabilize the kryptonian dna), and some of Danny’s (to keep the baby safe in the womb).

Once Danny was well and truly pregnant, he encouraged Tim to find Bruce. “I’ll keep the baby safe. You find your dad. If you need me for anything, I’m only a call away.” Tim hadn’t forgotten about Bruce, he’d just never thought it would take so long to set up cloning Kon. So much of his hurt and loneliness had fallen away in Danny’s presence, and Danny had let him hyper focus on making their baby.

“Probably terrible timing, but I’ve got to ask,” Tim swallowed nervously. “Be my boyfriend?”

Danny’s lopsided smile, thawed Tim’s nerves. “I think I could work with that. I hope you don’t mind kids though, I’m kind of pregnant.”

Tim huffed a laugh. “I’ll keep in touch while I’m away. Please keep me updated on the baby.”

Danny pulled him into a proper kiss, “I will.”

I’m mostly imagining Tim getting bump update photos and falling in love with his increasingly pregnant boyfriend, while he finds Bruce.

I’m also imagining after Bruce is back, Tim being like, “anyways gtg, my boyfriend is in his third trimester and I don’t want to miss the birth of our baby.” And peacing out before any bats could react, let alone stop him.

And also maybe when Kon comes back, there’s maybe a poly relationship started.

Also thinking about Tim getting Danny pregnant without the science.

Danny gets Dad, Tim gets Papa, and if Kon joins, he gets Poppy.

[nanamissuit]

I am back again.

*rubbing my hands while sending you a sweet sweet ask*

Fem reader that takes Ghost to meet her Family even when they're Hella toxic, always berating her, judging her, making her feel as if she's not good enough.

When they see the behemoth of a man who has her back and won't hesitate to break theirs, they all scatter away with their tails tucked beneath them.

Major satisfaction for both Ghost and his sweet woman.

Please make it angst and have badass boyfriend Ghosty save the day.🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Family Issues - Simon 'Ghost' Riley

Pairing: Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Hurt/Comfort,Angst,Fluff

It was no secret you hated your family. Your sister always tried to hit on every boyfriend you introduced, Your mom was emotionally abusive, and your father? Rarely around.

So when Ghost asked to meet your family you froze up and didn’t know what to say, of course he noticed. He asked why you looked upset and you sat him down on your couch.

“Well listen…My family isn’t uhm, functional and I just don’t think it’ll go the way you're expecting. I have no problem introducing you but you’re not gonna like it.” “Sweetie, trust me I won’t judge you for your family I know how you feel about ‘em.”

You smiled and rubbed your thumb over his hand. “Okay, I’ll call to see what day we can go over.” 

You called around an hour later and sat outside on your porch smoking a cigarette. Your mother picked up, “What.” “Hello to you too, listen I have a boyfriend of a couple of years and he wants to meet you guys.” “Whatever, Saturday 5:00 I’ll make dinner.” “Great, love you.” But she hung up on you before she could even hear you say “Love you.” You put out your cigarette and just sighed.

You told Ghost and he marked it on the calendar and the day came before you even knew it. You sighed as you got ready to go over. And he decided to wear his mask but he did dress decently to go over. He waited for you by the front door as he saw you putting on some shoes. He smiled and gave you loads of compliments.

The drive was around 15 minutes and when you knocked on the front door your sister opened it and practically shoved you inside just to get closer to Ghost.

“Hey I’m Samantha, you can call me Sam-” “Ghost. I think I’ll just call you Samantha.” She rolled her eyes and he just walked in and made sure you were okay. He never introduced himself as Ghost unless he wanted to intimidate or he didn’t like the person, you assumed he didn’t like your sister.

You lead him over to the dining room table and sat down next to him

You both waited for your mother to come sit with you guys before you ate and she came in around 2 minutes later with your father and your sister.

“Hm, You must be the unfortunate one. I’m her Mother just call me Teressa though and this is her Father, Michael.” He shook both of their hands. Now mind you they didn’t get a good look at how tall he was or how buff he was. Hell they haven’t seen his face.

“So what unfortunate events lead you to meet my shithole of a daughter?” Your mom asked nonchalantly and you took a deep breath and began to get some food.

“Not unfortunate at all, In fact she’s a catch. Met her at a bookstore.” Your sister scoffed and looked at Ghost and tried to rub up on him and he glared at her.

“A catch? She’s a lazy pile of shit. Nothing special about this one.” Your father spoke up and then you just stood up to excuse yourself to the porch outside. And your sister was still trying to hit on Ghost but he was just not having it.

“You’re all fucking pieces of shit, Samantha has been trying to seduce me since I got here and she’s fucking hideous! You’re a mother, act like it, or don’t even bother trying to reach out at all. And you..How could you talk about your own DAUGHTER like that? You’re a horrible excuse for a father.”

Samantha ran off to her room teary eyed and it seemed like your father stood up to intimidate Ghost but he was 5'9 and Ghost is 6'4 and he stood up after your father. He immediately sat down and just kicked him out as your own mother started to cry as well.

Ghost walked out and found you giggling because you heard him sticking up for you and he took you to the car and drove you both to an ice cream place to calm down after the events that took place.

You were so grateful for him, and he couldn’t live without you. So it’s a win-win situation. You love him and he loves you…Just not your family.

I LOVED MAKING THIS AHHH!! Your requests never fail to impress me:)!

[crusty-chronicles]

Yu Yu Hakusho Men Reacting to Receiving Flowers

Synopsis: How the men of Yu Yu Hakusho react to receiving flowers and if they'd get you some in return 🌺

Yusuke💥

He pretends to be offended, but honestly it makes his heart melt

The fact that you went out of your way to actually buy him something makes him feel special.

Doing it just because without expecting anything grand in return.

If you give him flowers in private, he puts up less of a fuss.

“I'm not sick or anything, you know. Besides, you could've just plucked some weeds instead of spending so much money.” He says after (not so) begrudgingly taking the small bouquet from you.

Already knowing they won't last more than a week in his care. But still trying to hide the heat rising to his cheeks.

But if you give him flowers in front of his friends, namely Kuwabara, he makes a big show of it.

“What am I? A girl? Or did you just wanna take on gardening, because there's no way in hell you actually got me flowers.”

You end up calling him a jerk before leaving.

And he feels really bad after.

Despite his tough guy act, he genuinely does care about you and hates to see you upset. Especially when it's because of him and his big mouth.

So he shows up later to your house with an even bigger bouquet of roses.

“I'm sorry for being an ass. I didn't mean it I just…didn't want- Well, Kuwabara would never let me live it down.” He tries to explain.

But you weren't buying it, judging by how you still hadn't opened your door all the way. So he tries to apologize again the only way he knows how.

“I'll take you out wherever you want for a week if you let me in?” He says hopefully.

“That's not enough. You really hurt my feelings today.”

“Two weeks. And I'll buy you flowers every day. Your favorites~ sunflowers.”

He keeps true to his word and makes sure to always accept whatever you gift him with a huge smile from now on.

No matter if it makes him look like a softie or not.

---------------------

Kurama🦊

He's thrilled

Will point out and explain what every flower means.

What each part of the bouquet symbolizes

Please buy this man red roses

As cliche as they are, they symbolize love. Your love.

And he can't help but be smitten by the fact.

He's not the slightest embarrassed whether you give them to him in public or private.

Even if the others tease him for it, he'll just come up with a witty remark to shut them down.

“Maybe they think you're a girl after all,” Yusuke said, followed by another taunt from Kuwabara.

“His delicate features got to them.”

“What a funny way of saying the two of you have never thought of getting your partners flowers before? You do know Valentine's Day is coming up right?” Kurama shut down.

And the both of them start racing to the nearest boutique. Pushing and shoving each other out of the way.

When you gift Kurama flowers, they don't wither away within a few weeks.

Instead he'll use his demon energy to keep them alive for years.

Might even plant some of them to make a new bouquet for you in the future.

All in all, it's one of the few gestures that makes his heart beat just a little bit faster. And he cherishes each and every bud.

------------------------------

Hiei ⚔️

He could care less tbh

He isn't all that familiar with human gestures, so he doesn't know what to make of it when you present him with a bouquet

“Are you taunting me?” He asks.

And you have to explain to him that sometimes humans like to gift flowers to their lovers as a way to show affection.

He personally thinks it's a waste of time and energy. A few weeds that shrivel up and die within a week are supposed to symbolize your feelings? Why waste your human currency when he can just show you affection through his actions. i.e. watching over you.

He tells you as much too, but the second he sees you deflate, he quickly snatches them up.

Grumbling out a ‘Don’t start sulking like a child. I didn't say I rejected your little gift.’ And a ‘Next time don't bother. Come to me directly.’

Hiei will only receive your flowers in private.

You will not be able to catch him in public to give them to him.

In fact, he rarely goes out during the day. Preferring to wait for you at home.

He will also not mention it to the others and trusts you'll do the same.

Your relationship is private, and he prefers to keep it that way.

While Hiei personally doesn't see the appeal of giving flowers, he knows you do.

Which is why you wake up one morning to see a single white orchid on your pillow

And he'll deny it was ever him that left it there.

--------------------

Bonus Jin🌪️

The purest of bois

He's absolutely ecstatic when you give him flowers

Like Hiei, he doesn't understand many human gestures. But it's the fact you're giving him something that makes him so happy.

You could probably give him a rock and he'd have the same reaction

He eventually asks you why you brought him flowers.

And when you say it's because you love him, he's practically jumping with joy. Picking you up in a strong hug and swinging you around a few times before placing a smooch on your cheek.

“You've got me ears wigglin’ and everything!” And sure enough, the tips of his ears are jittering about in excitement.

He'd like to return the favor and get you flowers just as beautiful however-

“We've got a few pretty plants in demon world, but they'd probably bite your head clean off. Woosh! Just like that.” He explains.

He settles for bringing you little wildflowers whenever he has a chance to visit instead.

He's a little fascinated to find out there's meaning behind each flower.

He just figured they were pretty and that's it.

When you tell him a baby’s breath (which he thinks is an incredibly weird name for a flower) means long lasting love, he swears he can feel his face warm.

So he tries to find you flowers that hold meaning too.

The color red always seems to mean love, so most of the flowers he gifts to you in return are that color.

He's just an absolute sweetheart all around 🥺

------------------

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY 💘

[lowkeychenle]

the 1 [NJM] (M)

Description: Six years ago, you decided to move away to a different country to go to school. The catch? You had to leave Jaemin behind, and you refused to drag him along. Now you're back and, for some reason, he doesn't quite seem to hate you in the way you thought he would.

(this is inspired by the Taylor Swift song by the same name, listen to it here)

Genre: Fluff/Smut/Angst TRIPLE THREAT (?? am i okay)

Content Warnings: Explicit sex, break ups, the angst isn't too bad I don't think. Just break up stuff l o l (also don't judge any typos or repetitions I didn't edit this because I wrote this whole thing today someone save me from myself) (also also I am totally working on all requests still, I just get random inspo sometimes and when it hits, it hits)

Word Count: 10,012 (yoo for why did I make this so long help)

Pairing: Na Jaemin x Reader (this is a non-canon AU, Jaemin is a lil businessman and the rest of Dream make appearances here. PS, Best Friend!Donghyuck y'all)

Juliet's Masterlist

Honestly, you never thought you’d make your way back to Seoul. Not when you didn’t have much to come back to. Leaving for college was the scariest decision you’d ever made, but you’re so much better off for it. The experience of living in another country—even if it just for school—is the best thing you’ve ever done.

But Seoul is home. Home is where the heart is, and yours has always resided here, even long after you left. You wonder about the friends you left behind, knowing you haven’t been the best at keeping up with them.

You especially think of Jaemin. The two of you were both twenty-two when you left and, at the time, you would’ve said you were in love with him. You’d been dating for a year before you made your decision.

You don’t think of him in a way that you still have feelings for him, but rather, you want the best for him. If anything, you want to know he’s been as successful as you after you walked away from him.

“America?” Jaemin raises his eyebrows, recoiling at the thought. “I mean, that’s a great opportunity, but wouldn’t it be hard?”

“Of course, it’ll be hard. I think I need to do this before it’s too late for me.” You look down at your hands to avoid eye contact with him. The last thing you want to do is break his heart. Hell, you’ll be breaking your own, too. But being in love with Jaemin doesn’t mean you have to stop everything going on in your life to make sure you keep him.

“How long?” he asks.

“The standard degree path is four years over there, but it could take longer.”

He pauses, gulping. “Wow. You’ll be gone for four years?”

“Yeah.” You pick at your nails and clear your throat. “This is…This is a once in a lifetime opportunity, Jaem. I can’t miss it.”

“I know. I wouldn’t want you to. Um, I guess I’m just nervous as to what that means for us.”

“I love you.” You reach for his hand, intertwining your fingers. “I love you so much, but I can’t ask you to wait for me for four years. Or longer.”

“It’s not like we won’t talk. We have calls, FaceTime, we have everything. However long you need, we’ll work it out.” He tilts his head. At your hesitation, worry spreads across his face.

“I…I don’t know if I’ll come back at all, is what I mean.” You finally meet his gaze and watch the shock course through him.

“Okay, then I’ll move there, too,” he replies, as if it were simple. His forehead wrinkles as he frowns. “If that’s what you want, I can do that. We’ve only been together a year, (Y/N), that’s not long enough for me. I need forever. I promised you forever and I meant it.”

“I won’t ask you to do that.” You shake your head, feeling your eyes well with tears. “Your family’s here. Your friends. We both know you wouldn’t want to move away from your mom forever.”

Jaemin lets out a short breath, tugging his hand away from yours and running it through his hair. “So that’s it? There’s no way I can convince you?”

“You deserve someone who wants the same things you do. The same life. If I can’t give that to you, someone else will. I love you, but sometimes, love isn’t always enough if we’re being pulled in different directions.”

“I won’t just forget about you. You’re just going to disappear?” He wipes away a tear, rolling his eyes.

“You don’t have to forget about me. I’m not forgetting about you. I just need to do something for myself, and I can’t force you along with me.”

The barista jolts you from your trance, asking you if there’s something she can help you with. You clear your throat, hoping you’ll be able to talk past the lump in your throat. After ordering your favorite coffee, you stand off to the side to wait for it.

The door dings behind you, but you think nothing of it. You continue about your business, checking your phone for the time and waiting for your drink. A message comes through from your friend Donghyuck asking if you’d gotten everything settled already.

You and Jaemin had the same friend group. That’s how you met, actually. Donghyuck brought you over to one of their group hang outs, and you and Jaemin clung to each other like glue. It was inevitable that you two would end up dating, and when you did, literally not one of them were surprised.

You send him a quick message back saying everything’s good, and then the barista calls your name. Smiling at her, you walk up to grab the steaming hot cup. Nearly groaning to yourself about how good it smells, you turn around to walk toward the door.

That’s when you see him.

Jaemin.

You haven’t seen him in years. Sure, you still had each other on social media, but you never went out of your way to look at him. Five years has done him well and, at first, you’re unsure if you should say anything. He’s staring right at you, but it doesn’t feel like an invitation. It feels weird.

He’s clearly not the same Jaemin he was, but he’s Jaemin.

And right when you think he’s going to storm off in the other direction and want nothing to do with you, he smiles widely and approaches you. His smile is as gorgeous as it was before, maybe even more so. Normally, this would do little to bother you. You two ended on somewhat good terms, so there’s no reason for either of you to be holding a grudge all this time later.

He wears black pants with a pale pink button-down tucked into them. There isn’t another word to describe him other than divine. He looks good. 

With his hands buried in his pockets, he makes his way over. “I thought that was you.”

“Yeah, it’s me.” You laugh shortly, surprised that you don’t feel too awkward now that he’s in front of you. “Wow, how long has it been?”

As if you don’t know.

“Five years?” he says it like a question. “It hasn’t been that long since we’ve talked though. I guess things are just hard with time zones, aren’t they?”

You give an exaggerated nod. “Totally get that. Well, how have you been?”

“Busy.” He snorts, widening his eyes. “Busy like you wouldn’t believe. Did you end up getting your degree over there? Have you been to see Donghyuck yet?”

“I got the very expensive piece of paper, yes. And I haven’t seen him yet, no. I got back two days ago and have been trying to get things settled before I take a break.” You sip your coffee, almost sighing at the taste of vanilla on your tongue.

“I’m proud of you.” He purses his lips. “Not sure if that means much, but I am. I’m glad it worked out the way you wanted.”

“Thank you. It means a lot, especially from you. What did you decide to do here?” you ask him, tilting your head a bit.

“I’m surprised you didn’t hear,” Jaemin says. “Renjun, Chenle, Jeno, and I opened a business a couple years back. We’ve been doing pretty well, but it doesn’t really leave us with much time for anything else.”

“Holy shit, Jaem, that’s awesome.” You can’t help but grin at him. “I always knew you guys were destined for great things.”

You think back to when you’d hang out with all of them—Jaemin, Mark, Renjun, Jeno, Donghyuck, Chenle, and Jisung. Every Saturday night, you’d all get together for drinks at someone’s house, a constant rotation of happiness, friendship, and pure adoration. You love all of them, albeit in different ways, you feel a strong connection to them all. Being without them for so long has certainly made you nostalgic, but you’re sure you’ll at least see some of them now that you’re back.

You’re not sure if Jaemin will ever be comfortable hanging out with you. Neither of you were particularly bitter in your breakup, but it wasn’t mutual. You didn’t even want it, and he certainly didn’t either. But Jaemin has always been understanding—almost to a fault. He would never ask you to do something if it was against what you wanted to do.

“You know.” He pauses, running his tongue over his teeth. “Are you busy? I’m on my lunch, so if you want to catch up a little, I have the time.”

You hesitate, unsure if it’s a good idea. Before you and Jaemin dated, he was an excellent friend, too. Your only worry at this point is if things will be awkward between the two of you, but it doesn’t seem to be that way yet.

“Yeah, actually.” You take another sip of your coffee, cradling your jacket over your arm to your chest.

He gives you another dazzling smile and gestures over to a small table by the window. “After you.”

You sit down, shrugging your purse from your shoulder and hanging it from the back of the chair. He follows your lead, black hair falling like a curtain over his forehead as he leans forward to bring the seat closer. An odd urge to brush it away overtakes you, but you grab your coffee instead.

Your past with Jaemin is long gone. He’s definitely moved on to bigger, better things, and so have you. Your time in America wasn’t wasted, and you knew from Donghyuck the moment Jaemin moved on from you. It didn’t hurt the way you thought it would. You wanted him happy and cared for, and if you couldn’t do it, you hoped and prayed someone else would.

That was three years ago, but Donghyuck never talked about Jaemin to you again, unless it was something small that happened in a group setting. At that point, you’d also moved on, so as long as he was alive and thriving, you didn’t need to hear about it. Everything was okay.

You’ll always hold an unmatched adoration for the man sitting in front of you. He was your first real love, but everyone knows not everything in your early twenties lasts. It’s true what they say—that you never truly forget your first love. That, and how once you love someone, you’ll always hold some sort of affection for them in your heart.

You tell Jaemin of all the things you got to do in America, and he listens intently. In turn, he tells you about his business and how they grew it from the ground up. It’s one of the largest companies in South Korea, and your heart warms with pride.

Everything you did makes sense. You did it for a good reason. If he had dropped everything and come with you to America, he wouldn’t be doing what he loves. Eventually, you were sure he would’ve grown to resent you if he had gone.

Before you know it, the two of you have been talking for well over an hour. Your coffee is gone, the small bit left at the bottom chilled. On a whim, he checks his watch and recoils in shock.

“Oh shit,” he murmurs. “I’m sorry, I didn’t even realize how long we’d been here.”

“It’s no big deal,” you reply, waving him off. “I’ll get going though.”

“Actually…So the guys and I still do Saturday nights. If you want to come this Saturday, it’s at my place. If you want, I can text you the address.” He taps his fingers on the table.

“Yeah, that sounds like a lot of fun. It’ll be nice to see everyone. I did get a new number though, so let me give it to you.” You reach into your purse for your phone so you can find it. Since you had to switch plans when you moved back, you don’t really know it yet either.

You read it off to him, and he purses his lips while he sends his address to you in a text message. Afterwards, he stands up and brushes off his pants.

“It’ll be just like old times. Jisung is finally old enough to drink, too.” Jaemin chuckles to himself before running his fingers through his hair to push it back. ���I’ll see you Saturday? We start at six.”

“Absolutely. I’ll be there.” You watch as he retreats away from you, head held high as he walks out of the coffee shop. He was confident back when you dated, but he’s even more so, and for good reason. No matter what, it’s like he gets increasingly attractive as he ages.

As soon as he’s out of sight, you tap your cheeks to get the slight blush off of them. You didn’t expect to run into him like that, not so soon, but you’re glad you did. Everything happens for a reason, and you’re glad he’s okay with everyone hanging out. You’d hate to lose out on your friends because they have to pick sides.

The encounter stays heavy on your mind even until the next day when you’re supposed to meet Donghyuck for lunch. Your apartment is on the smaller side, since most of your savings was spent to get over here.

The living room is a little under furnished, but it’s nothing you won’t accumulate as time goes on. You have a soft loveseat, a TV mounted to the wall, and a small hallway off to the side that contains your kitchen and all the appliances. Your bedroom is on the left side, big enough only for your bed and a dresser.

You stand in front of the bathroom mirror, trying your best to look at least presentable. You’ve been exhausted lately. Moving countries, across the world, takes a toll on you. At least today is Thursday. You have a job interview tomorrow, and then you’ll get to see your friends on Saturday. Your heart aches for them. They were the best friends you ever had, a complete, close knit group of people who just function so well together. There wasn’t anything else in the world like it.

You go to the small sandwich shop, finding Donghyuck already sitting there waiting for you. His face lights up like a Christmas tree at the sight of you, and his chair scrapes across the floor as he hurries to get up and hug you. He squeezes you so tightly, you almost can’t breathe. You laugh anyway, returning the gesture the best you can.

“My God, I feel like I haven’t seen you in years!” he says, smiling widely. “Shit, you’re not allowed to move out of the country again.”

You roll your eyes, nudging him. “You came to visit six months ago.”

“Six months is still half a year, (Y/N). Never again.”

“Luckily for you, I do plan on staying.” You wait for him to release you before the two of you head over to the line to order.

“Every time I see you, it’s like you’ve grown up more.” Donghyuck fakes a pout, shaking his head. “Look at you, being an adult in the world.”

“Shut your mouth,” you say. “You’re only a year older than me.”

“A year is plenty of time for extra wisdom.” He crosses his arms over his chest, raising his eyebrows like his point is valid.

He orders for both of you, insisting on paying even though you’re about ready to wrestle his wallet out of his hands. It doesn’t matter if you had a billion dollars, he would still insist. That’s always what he’s been for you, your best friend. He takes care of you even when you don’t need it.

“So, when’s your interview?” he asks, accepting the cups from the person at the counter. Handing it to you, he leads you over to the fountain, filling his with Coke Zero.

“I’m glad to see some things never change.” You grin, picking your favorite drink as well. “It’s tomorrow. I’m hoping it works out, because job searching is so tiring.”

“Tell me about it. I’m sure it’ll go great. You’re multilingual and stuff. Employers love that shit.”

Before you respond, the order is ready. You two walk back to your table, conversing back and forth about random things. The conversation takes a turn, and you’re surprised when he actually brings it up.

“Jaemin said he invited you for Saturday.” Donghyuck sips his drink. “Are you going?”

You frown. “Well, yeah. I wouldn’t miss something like that. It’s been too long since I’ve seen everyone.”

“I know that. It’s not weird with you and him, though?”

“Not at all.” You chew the inside of your cheek as you contemplate. “I was worried it would be, but we caught up a little. He seems to be doing really well. If it’s not awkward for him, it won’t be for me. I’d love to be reinstated in the friend group.”

“Reinstated?” He scrunches his nose. “That implies that you were ever un-instated.”

“Is…is that a word?” You chuckle.

“I don’t know. Sounds right to me.” He shrugs, taking a large bite of his sandwich. “I did tell them you were coming back, but also that I didn’t know if you’d be comfortable with that. They all miss you. I swear, Jisung has been talking my ear off asking when we’ll all get together. He’ll be so happy you’re coming.”

Jisung has always been the baby of the group. Even as a full grown adult, you all treat him like a child. He doesn’t complain about it, and he feeds into it probably a bit more than he should. You learn Mark and Donghyuck live together, Jaemin, Chenle, and Jeno live in their own places, and Jisung and Renjun live together. You’re a bit shocked by the last pairing, but you don’t say anything about it.

“Just promise me that if it does get weird, you’ll tell me?”

“I’ll tell you. Promise.” You nod. “I don’t think it will. It was years ago, Hyuck. He moved on, I moved on, and we’re completely different people now. Neither of us are mad.”

“Good. It’ll be nice to have the family back together again.”

After lunch, Donghyuck drives you home. You thank him for the ride, and you head up to your apartment. Regardless of what you say out loud, your brain truly is whirling like crazy after your time with Jaemin.

You didn’t expect seeing him to send you for a loop like this, but you can’t help but think back to how happy you were with him. You two were…something. Maybe not perfect, but it was fun. Magnetic. Passionate. Everything you’ve tried to replicate, even though it’s impossible. No other man could ever be Jaemin.

Your mind drifts off, and you lose yourself in memories.

Saturday nights were a novelty. You sit on Chenle’s couch with Jaemin practically hung over you, the rest of the guys talking simultaneously and incredibly loudly. You didn’t mind it. In fact, you loved it. It reminded you how many people you had by your side, and how many of them were truly like you.

Jaemin kisses your temple, pausing there for a moment. It’s late, and you know he’s getting tired. Even though these are your best friends, you understand his need to wind down after a long night. You bring your wine glass up to your lips, finishing it off.

“Ready?” he asks softly.

You glance over at him and nod, smiling. “Yeah, let me go put this away.”

When you stand up, hardly anyone notices. Chenle and Jisung are basically yelling at each other about something you can’t discern. You laugh when Chenle argues with dramatic hand motions. That’s how you know it’s serious.

You’re pretty sure Renjun has Jeno in a headlock, but you go into the kitchen before you get a good look. It’s a bit quieter in here, and you take a deep breath. You place the glass gently into the sink, closing your eyes and craning your neck back in an attempt to relax. Saturday nights drain you in the best ways, and exhaustion is starting to creep in.

Before you know it, a pair of arms snake around your waist, tugging you back gently. You find yourself against Jaemin’s chest, and you instinctively lean your head on his shoulder.

“And I thought I was tired,” he mumbles, kissing your hairline. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, I’m okay. Can I stay with you tonight?” You turn to face him, lost in the way the lights glitter in his deep brown eyes. He truly is the most beautiful man you’ve ever seen, and you don’t have to restrain yourself from reaching up to cup his cheek. His skin is so smooth beneath your touch, you want to touch it forever.

“You don’t even have to ask.” He nods. “You’re always allowed to stay with me.”

Jaemin tells the boys you’re leaving. Chenle and Jisung halt their argument to give you a hug, and even Renjun allows Jeno some breathing time so he can say goodbye, too. Jaemin’s place isn’t far from Chenle’s, so you sit in silence for the ride, sleep threatening to take over on the way.

His fingers intertwine with yours over the center console, and his thumb rubs gently on your skin. You hum in content.

“Don’t fall asleep yet,” he whispers, careful not to startle you. “We’re almost there, my love.”

You try your best to listen to him. When you finally pull into his building’s parking lot, you’re barely able to keep your eyes open.

This week had been extra long, and you weren’t sure if you’d be able to go to Chenle’s tonight in the first place. You’re glad you did, but you’d much rather be curled up with Jaemin. He unbuckles his seatbelt and gets out, striding over to your side of the car.

Opening your door, he reaches across you to take your seatbelt off. “You okay? Do you want me to carry you?”

“Carry me? Jaem, you live on the fourth floor. I’ll be fine, just help me up.” You hold your hand out to him, but he clicks his tongue and slides his hands beneath your back and knees.

“You underestimate me,” he teases you, pulling you into his chest. “I’ll get you upstairs.”

Instead of arguing, you let your head fall onto his chest and you listen to his steady heartbeat. You’ve been together for six months now, and everything has been perfect. At this point, you’re pretty sure you want to marry Jaemin. You don’t know if he feels the same way, but you know you’d be damn lucky if that’s how things go.

He’s caring. Loving. All the things you could ever ask for. Hell, he’s carrying you into his apartment building so you don’t have to walk. He’ll make breakfast in the morning like he always does when you stay the night, and he’ll brush your hair and braid it if you want.

When you finally make it up to the fourth floor (via elevator, thankfully for Jaemin), his heart is still steady in his chest, and he brings you inside his apartment easily. He immediately brings you into his bedroom, setting you on his bed.

“Want a shirt, love?” he asks, heading over to his dresser.

“Please.” Your eyes are closed as you rest on his pillow, sinking into the soft mattress as if you’re on top of a cloud.

Jaemin grabs one for you, helping you sit up so he can help you take your blouse off. He pulls it over your head, the cotton fabric settling on your skin. It smells of his laundry detergent, so you take a deep breath to appreciate it.

“Okay,” he mutters. “Lay down now.”

He guides you back down, and he finds the button on your jeans. You aide him in taking them off of you, and then he kneels on the floor next to you, eye level with you.

“I love you,” he says, brushing your hair behind your ear. “Forever. I promise.”

“Me too,” you reply, voice quiet. “Love you forever.”

With a soft smile, he leans forward to kiss your forehead. “Get some sleep, my love. I’ll be back to cuddle in a few minutes.”

You watch him walk into his bathroom, but you’re fast asleep before he comes back out.

Forever. You scoff at your ceiling. What a concept. A novelty, really. You’re not even sure if it exists at this point. If a man like Jaemin wasn’t your forever, who the hell would be? Nobody interested you enough. You don’t think you want Jaemin anymore, but you don’t want anyone else either.

A cat. That’s what you need.

You try to distract yourself with the thought of that, but it doesn’t take long for another memory to completely consume you.

“Is this okay?” he asks, chest heaving while he hovers above you as his hand rubs up and down your side. “Tell me if you’re not comfortable.”

“I love you,” you tell him easily, as if the words are second-nature when they come to him. “I’m ready. I want you.”

Seven months in, and you and Jaemin were just now preparing to have sex for the first time. You’d touched each other, explored each other, but he always insisted he wanted it to be perfect. This, you decide, is perfect. He’s perfect. Nothing about him makes you nervous, and you’re more than ready to take the next step with him.

Neither of you are virgins, but it’d obviously been a while for you both. He lines himself up with your entrance and groans.

“You’re so wet,” he murmurs, as if he’s mesmerized. “I love you.”

To quell his nerves, you pull him down into a soft kiss, letting your mouths work together in perfect harmony while he slowly, carefully pushes inside you. His lips part, still pressed to yours, once he’s fully in.

Your eyes desperately want to flutter shut, but you don’t dare look away from him right now. He stays there for a moment, relishing in the feeling of the two of you finally being connected like this. Jaemin is deeply sentimental, so you know how much it means for him to take this step with you.

“You’re so beautiful,” he groans, taking your bottom lip between his teeth and tugging gently. “God, you feel so good.”

A small whimper leaves you at the sensation, and you rock your hips in response. “Move,” you tell him.

He drops his head to your neck, kissing, sucking, and nipping as he sets his pace. Oh so careful not to break you, he moans into your skin, the vibrations making your whole body tremble. The slide of him against your walls is intoxicating, and all you can do is take it, legs locked firmly around him as he takes you to a new world.

“Jaem.” You sigh, running your fingers through his hair for encouragement.

He continues to thrust, his breathing starting to increase when he gets closer to the edge. Without missing a beat, he reaches between the two of you to rub circles on your clit. You moan a bit louder than you should, but you don’t care.

Suddenly, you’re floating, brain going fuzzy when you reach heights you never thought you could. Your back arches into his body, nails digging into his shoulders as the world tilts off its axis.

“Shit,” he gasps, hips bucking. “You’re squeezing me so tight.”

You let out a shuddering breath, body slumping when you land from your free fall. Weaving your fingers through his hair, you pull him up to kiss you, swallowing his breathy whine as he cums.

Both of you sit there for a few moments, the only sounds are from the panting. He rests more of his weight on top of you, enveloping you in all the heat pouring out of his body. With a sweet kiss, he hums into your mouth.

“We’re gonna have to do that again.” He chuckles, his nose nuzzling your cheek. “You’re so fucking perfect.”

“Says you,” you retort.

“I’m so serious.” Jaemin frowns at you. “I’m going to make love to you forever. We’ll get old and gray and I’ll still find you sexy.”

You laugh, smacking his chest. “You’re ridiculous. But you better mean that.”

“I’ve never meant anything more.”

When Saturday rolls around, you head into your closet to pick out an outfit. You don’t want to wear anything too fancy, but not too casual either. Settling on a flowy, pale pink top and a pair of jeans, staring at yourself in the mirror for much too long.

No part of today has to be weird. You’ll show up, have a great night, go home, and repeat it again the next week. Even knowing that, you’re more nervous for tonight than you were for your interview yesterday.

You think you got the job, but you’d hear back for sure on Monday. Logically, you have nothing to worry about on either end.

You put Jaemin’s address into the map on your phone, and you see it’s not too far from your apartment. Donghyuck offered to pick you up, but you decided it’d be best if you got there on your own. That way, you don’t have to make Hyuck leave early if things aren’t going well for you.

You slide on your boots, checking your pockets to make sure you have everything before you walk out into the street. Locking the door behind you, you make your way over. It’s a little before six, but everyone knows you’re chronically early. Even when you and Jaemin were dating, you were at least fifteen minutes early for every occasion.

You’re excited to see Jaemin again, but you know you shouldn’t be. In fact, you distract yourself with the idea of all the other boys. You saw Hyuck already, but seeing all the others for the first time in years is going to be a great experience.

When you arrive at the building, you blink in surprise. With him being a successful businessman, you knew he probably didn’t live in the same place, but this one shocked you. It’s huge. There are probably dozens of floors, and you have to look at his text message again to see which one he’s on.

Twenty-four? Holy shit.

You step into the lobby, and the man at the front desk also serves as an elevator guard. When you approach, he raises his eyebrows at you.

“Where are you needing to go, ma’am?” he asks.

“Twenty-fourth floor, it doesn’t say a number on the text, though—”

“Let me call up there to confirm. What’s your name?”

“(Y/N),” you reply, shifting on your feet.

“One moment, please.” He grabs the phone off the hook and dials quickly. “Mr. Na, I have a woman here to see you. Her name is (Y/N).”

It only takes a second for the man to nod and hang up the phone. He bows his head to you and gestures behind him. “He said he’s expecting you.”

The doors part for you and you step inside, and somehow, the button for the twenty-fourth floor is already pressed. You wait patiently inside as you ascend, the nerves beginning to sink in. Jaemin might be expecting you, sure, but you’re probably going to be the first one there. You always are.

When the elevator dings and opens, you expect a hallway. Instead, you’re walking straight into Jaemin’s living room. The wall across from you is all glass, the buzzing city view below making your heart drop. Hardwood flooring covers the expanse of the room, a faux fireplace on with a large sectional in front of it, a coffee table, and several other seating arrangements.

A few bottles of rosé are in a bin of ice on the coffee table, with ten glasses set out. You frown, letting your mind wander on who they could be for.

“Oh, you’re here!” It’s not Jaemin’s voice you hear.

When you turn toward it, you’re surprised to see a woman. She’s beautiful, with long black hair and shining brown eyes, and it takes you less than a split second to realize who she is. What did you expect? Jaemin moved on, and you shouldn’t be surprised. Your ribcage shouldn’t be constricting as hard as it is right now, but you laugh as she gives you a hug.

“Sorry, I’m a hugger.” She chuckles as she pulls away from you. “I’ve heard so much about you. The boys get so crazy when good things happen. It’ll be nice to have another girl around here, Jiyoon and I are pretty close to insane. I’m Yeeun.”

She holds her hand out to you and you take it, overwhelmed by the information she’s given you. Jaemin walks out from the kitchen, his white button-down shirt sleeves rolled up to the elbows and the bottom hem tucked into a pair of blue jeans.

“Don’t scare her away.” Jaemin grins, shaking his head at her. “She’s kind of shy.”

“I’m not shy,” you retort.

“And that’s why you’re only one step inside, right?” Jaemin quirks an eyebrow, leaning his shoulder against the wall. “Make yourself at home. Lord knows everyone else does.”

“Where should I put my stuff?” I ask.

“The couch is fine. Everyone should be here soon.” Jaemin gestures over, but before you say anything else, he heads back into the kitchen.

“He’s so serious.” Yeeun cringes, walking with you to the couch. “Sometimes I think he’s got a stick in some places.”

“I can hear you,” Jaemin says.

You have to hold back another laugh.

“That’s the point,” she shouts back.

You take a seat and cross your legs, taking in the grandeur of Jaemin’s apartment. Various paintings hang on the walls and, in the midst of your concentration, something jumps in your lap. You gasp, throwing your hand over your mouth.

Thankfully, it’s just a kitten.

“Oh, that’s Luna.” Yeeun reaches over to give her a quick pet. “Jaemin’s got three cats. Luna, Lucy, and Luke. They kinda look similar, but you’ll learn them eventually.”

You stare at the animal in shock, wondering what convinced Jaemin to get three at once. Shrugging it off, you pick her up and hold her to your chest, running your hand over her soft fur.

“Chenle should be here any minute,” Yeeun says under her breath, glancing down at her phone. “Let me c—”

The elevator dings again, and Chenle walks in without a second thought. He tosses his jacket on the table and rolls his shoulders as if he’s done a bunch of work. Yeeun launches from the couch, and you can’t say you’re not relieved when you see her plant a kiss firmly on his lips. She’s not Jaemin’s girlfriend, she’s Chenle’s.

“You miss me after not seeing me for an hour?” he teases her, his arm wrapped around her waist.

“You’re so mean.” She scrunches her face, grabbing his hand and leading him over to the couch.

Chenle grins widely when he sees you and gives you a quick hug. “You finally decide to come back after five years?”

“Don’t be a brat.” You snort. “You’re elated I’ve returned.”

“We all are,” he says easily. “If I have to hear Hyuck cry one more time about you being thousands of miles away I might end him.”

“You and me both.”

“Oh, I had Yeeun come a little early. I knew you’d be atrociously early because you’re you, and I thought it might be weird with you and Jaemin alone, so…” Chenle lowers his voice.

“I appreciate you.” You smile, taking your spot back on the couch. “I’m okay, though. Really.”

Especially now that you know Jaemin’s not dating Yeeun.

“Chenle, I swear to God, if you eat all of this fucking board before everyone else gets here, I’m going to kill you.” Jaemin reenters, placing a charcuterie board down by the wine. “This took hours, dude.”

“I’ll leave it alone.” Chenle holds his hands up in mock surrender, sitting next to Yeeun and throwing his arm over her shoulders.

The next one to show up is Hyuck, who brings Mark in tow. They both hug you, and by now, conversation is flowing with everyone. Jeno is next, then Renjun and Jisung. You’re not sure what you were expecting from him, but he’s definitely turned into a grown up since the last time you’ve seen him.

“Holy shit,” you say, practically in awe. “Did you have seven growth spurts?”

“Actually, I think it was only one.” He laughs, patting your back. “I didn’t believe Hyuck when he said you were coming. Told him I’d have to see it with my own eyes first.”

When everyone is finally sitting down around the couch, you notice Chenle already eating some of the cheese. Jaemin glares at him, but he eventually gives up. You sit between Yeeun and Donghyuck, fading into the conversation in the way you used to. It warms your heart, and you have to fight the overwhelming feeling of having missed so much time.

Leaving was worth it. The experience you had was unlike any other, but you regretted not staying in contact with all of them—even Jaemin. Mark opens the wine first, pouring it into nine of the glasses.

“Where’s Jiyoon?” He frowns, directing his gaze to Jisung.

He shrugs. “She’ll be here soon. Her grandparents are in town, so she’s staying with her mom until they leave. But she shouldn’t be any later than seven-thirty.”

Your mind whirls at how they’re reacting to Jisung having a girlfriend like it’s normal. He’ll always be your baby brother in your eyes, regardless of blood relation.

“How’d your interview go?” Donghyuck asks you, roping you into the conversation.

“Oh, I think it went well. I find out for sure on Monday, so I’ll let you know.” You grin. “I’m ready to start making more money.”

“Why don’t you just come work for us?” Chenle offers. “I’m surprised Hyuck didn’t tell us you were looking for a job still.”

Donghyuck drops his head into his palm. “No shit, sherlock. Think about why I wouldn’t.”

“It doesn’t need to be like that,” Jaemin interjects, sighing. “(Y/N) and I are good. There’s no eggshells to walk on. Just let it go. Pretend it never happened.”

Pretend it never happened?

Your heart ping pongs around your chest, and you choke on your sip of wine. Everyone turns toward you and you chuckle nervously.

“Sorry. I wasn’t expecting this topic.” You set the glass down on the table, suddenly much less interested in it.

“If that’s what she wants, she can absolutely do that,” Jaemin continues. “If we’re ever going to be normal, we can’t be the only ones over it.”

You stare down at your lap, fidgeting with your hands as you try to ignore all the attention on you.

“Um.” You clear your throat. “I’m gonna go grab some water.”

You shoot up from your spot, darting into the kitchen before anyone can say anything else. Once you reach the island, you brace your palms on it to keep you afloat. You close your eyes and let out a deep breath.

“Hey,” Jaemin murmurs, stopping next to you. “Are you okay? I’m sorry if that was too much.”

“I’m fine.”

“Did I say something?” He furrows his eyebrows and shifts closer so you have to look at him.

“No, Jaemin, I promise. Everything’s good. I just need a minute.” You run your fingers through your hair and glance around the room. “Do you have water bottles?”

“In the fridge,” he replies.

Crossing his arms over his chest, he rests his back on the edge of the island, watching you as you grab one. You twist off the cap and take a sip.

“I don’t want you to be uncomfortable. That was never my intention.” Jaemin sighs.

“Regardless of your intention, I’m not uncomfortable. Everyone’s just so…different. But the same. And I missed you guys, you know? I missed Saturday nights and being around my favorite people, but it’s…Forget it. Please.”

“Okay.” He nods. “Come back out whenever you’re ready, then.”

Jaemin walks away from you, looking back once over his shoulder before he disappears around the corner. You bury your head in your hands, but you refuse to let anyone think you’re upset. About anything. Jaemin especially.

You take another drink of water before you follow him out to the living room. When you make it back to your spot between Hyuck and Yeeun, he leans over to whisper, “I got up to follow you and he looked like he would rip my head off if I moved another muscle.”

You snort. “Yeah, sure.”

Shortly after that incident, Jiyoon finally shows up. She’s a bit taller than Yeeun, with dyed blonde hair and brown eyes. Jisung introduces the two of you, and she greets you kindly. Mark fills her glass and hands it to her.

 You hear funny stories from Jeno, listen to Renjun scolding Jisung about something, and rest your head on Hyuck’s shoulder. He doesn’t seem to mind, so you don’t plan on moving. He’s having a heated discussion about something to do with stocks with Jaemin and Mark. You happily tune them out, because you have no idea what they’re talking about.

You finish your glass of wine and pour yourself another one. Chenle’s taken care of most of the charcuterie board by now, and Yeeun is showing him videos on her phone. You take a moment to appreciate everyone around you, something you never did before, and realize change may not be a bad thing.

Yes, everyone is different, but so are you. It’s magical when people grow up in the same direction, even past time, distance, and space. They’re all the same at their core, but older. Wiser. Happier. More mature.

You’re on your third glass by the time the night deepens. It must be past ten o’clock at this point, but you don’t feel tired at all. You’re surprised when Chenle and Yeeun leave first. They both hug you on their way out.

Apparently, they broke the seal, because Jisung and Jiyoon are next, followed closely by Renjun. Jeno doesn’t leave until eleven, and Mark and Donghyuck are packing up to leave as well.

“Do you need a ride home?” Hyuck asks.

“I’m okay.” You shake your head. “I’ll leave in a few minutes, don’t worry.”

He hesitates, but eventually listens to you. You’re left alone with Jaemin, much to your surprise, and he’s not kicking you out at the first opportunity he gets.

“Did you want help cleaning up?” you question.

“There’s not much to clean,” Jaemin replies, standing from his seat. “I won’t say no to help though.”

“Of course.” You chuckle and get up, brushing off your jeans. 

Grabbing a few of the glasses, you carry them into the kitchen and put them by the sink. Between the two of you, you’ve got everything in the kitchen within a few minutes.

“I’m glad you came,” Jaemin says, running the water to rinse out the dishes.

“Me too.” It’s not a lie. You love being in this group, but you wonder if there was a better way to ease back in.

“I…Can I say something?” he asks. “If it’s too weird, you can tell me no.”

“By all means.”

“You know I’m not mad at you, right? I’m not bitter and I don’t hate you. I missed you a lot, actually. But I don’t want you to think you can’t come around because of me.” He pauses, taking his bottom lip between his teeth. “I’m really proud of you. Of all the things you’ve accomplished, and I know we couldn’t have done the same things if we had stayed together.”

You don’t mean to let out a relieved breath, but his words take a weight off your shoulders. “Thank you, Jaem. I’m proud of you too.”

“Have one more drink with me? For old times’ sake?” 

“I’d love that.”

So that’s how you end up next to Jaemin on his couch, his feet kicked up on his coffee table. You make jokes, talk about everyday things, but the more you drink, the more you crave to know about the past, about what happened after you left.

“Is the past off-limits?” You turn to look at him, almost blushing when you realize how close his face is to yours.

“I don’t think so.” He shakes his head. “But for every question you ask me, I get to ask you one.”

“That sounds like a good deal.” You smile. “But you go first.”

He gives you a half-smile before pursing his lips as he thinks. “Was it easy for you? Over there, I mean.”

“I wouldn’t say it was easy. It’s hard to pinpoint the exact experience because things are so different here…but I don’t think I’d go back. It was a good experience, and I loved it, but this is where I belong.” You stop, contemplating your own question. “How were you?”

“Is complete honesty okay?” He quirks an eyebrow.

“It’s preferred, actually.” You take another sip.

“It took me a long time to recover. And I don’t want to make you feel bad, because what’s done is done, and we both needed the room to grow. You know, if you never hurt, you’ll never learn. Life is full of learning experiences. But yeah, I was a mess for a while. I loved you long after you left.” He smiles, as if loving you is a fond memory. “Do you miss me?”

Present tense. Miss. Not did you miss me, but do you miss me.

You chuckle, pursing your lips. “Yeah, I do.”

When you meet his gaze again, you see the soft look he gave you whenever he saw you before. He gulps, wetting his lips. Your heart twists in your chest as you realize what this means for you. No matter how much time passes, you’ll never stop loving Jaemin. It doesn’t matter how far apart you’ve been or for how long, because all of you yearns for all of him.

Your voice shakes when you ask your next question. “Where would we be if I hadn’t left? If I changed that, would everything be different?”

“Um.” He’s only inches away from you, studying your face with fervor. “In my mind, I definitely thought we’d be married by now. In love and happy, making babies that hopefully look more like you.”

You try not to let the tears form, but they sting your eyes anyway.

“Is that what you wanted?” he whispers.

“Well, I kinda wanted them to look more like you, but yeah.” You laugh as a tear falls, and you move to wipe it away, but Jaemin beats you to it. His thumb swipes across your cheek.

You’re not sure what’s happening between the two of you, but every part of you craves this.

“We were pretty great, huh?”

“Is that your question?” He smiles. “Because yeah, we were.”

“If that was mine, that one counted as yours too.” You lean into his touch, letting the warmth seep through your skin. “God, I wish it had been you. I wish you were the one.”

His lips part, but it sounds as if his words catch in his throat. He blinks rapidly for a second, gulping. “Who said I can’t be?”

He leans closer.

“I’m gonna kiss you now.”

Your heart drops, but you give him a tiny nod, aching for him. “Jaemin.”

He stops right before your mouths connect, and he lets out a sigh.

“Jaemin,” you repeat. “I have to say something first.”

“Okay.”

“I thought I got over you, but it’s only because I didn’t see you for years. Being with you right now…I might still love you, and if you’re not kissing me for the same reasons, we should stop before we both get hurt again.” You clench your eyes shut, refusing to look at him while you make a fool of yourself.

“I was hoping you’d say that.” He doesn’t give you the chance to respond, kissing you hard. You melt into him, much like the ways you used to.

He shifts to cup both of your cheeks, his mouth working against yours in that perfect harmony you’d only ever found with him. You grasp onto his sleeves. When he pulls away, he rests his forehead on yours.

“I…” he trails off, wetting his lips. “I want you.”

His voice is raspy as he says it, and it sends heat between your legs. You clench your thighs together.

“Me too,” you reply. “I want you, too.”

“Are you sure?” he asks.

“Of course.” You lean forward to kiss him, and as your lips meet his, he pulls you onto his lap. Straddling him, you weave your fingers in his hair and hold him close to you.

His hands dip down to your ass, squeezing it and pushing you a bit forward. You groan when you feel his tongue slide across your bottom lip, and you give him access. Without a fight, you let him dominate your mouth. When you grind down, you gasp when you feel him hardening beneath you.

“You’re so perfect,” he whispers, only breaking the kiss for a split second.

He lets out a small whine when you pull away from him, but he’s quickly silenced when you tug your blouse over your head. While he stares at your black lace bra, you work on unbuttoning his shirt.

 “Not here,” he interrupts you, grabbing your hands. “There’s only one place I want to have you right now.”

He stands, holding onto you tightly while you wrap your legs around his waist. For a brief second, you think about what Hyuck would say to you right now—if he would be okay with it or if he would call it a mistake—but you chase the thought away as fast as it comes.

Jaemin carries you to his bedroom, kicking the door shut behind him. He sets you delicately onto his bed, the familiar softness making you sigh. After he finishes taking his shirt off, he climbs on top of you, kissing your cheek, your jawline, down the pulse thundering in your neck, your collarbone, the swells of your breasts. He leaves marks on them before continuing his descent.

And then he’s at the hem of your jeans. He looks up at you, eyebrows raised. “Can I?”

“Please.”

Jaemin is a unique lover. He memorizes all the things you love, what makes you tick, and what he can do to elevate your pleasure. You’ve never had to fake it with him.

“It’s been a while for me,” he mutters. “It might not be…the best.” He clears his throat awkwardly, but pops the button and unzips the zipper.

“I’ll be happy with whatever you can give me,” you say.

His confidence returns after that, and he moves to tug your pants down your legs. You try your best to help him get them off of you, and he finally makes it back between your legs. He rubs his thumb over the obvious wet spot in your panties, humming to himself.

“Time doesn’t change how wet you get for me, huh?” He tsks, pressing a kiss to your clit through the fabric.

When he tugs them down, he admires you before leaning forward. You don’t expect the electric shock you feel when his mouth comes in contact with your core, but it has your back arching when he’s hardly done anything. Your hand immediately finds his hair, gripping it.

His tongue slides along your entrance, barely dipping inside before flicking your clit. He teases you like this a few times, but then his lips wrap around your sensitive bud and he sucks. His fingers trail up your thigh, and he extracts a moan from you when he pushes them inside you.

You inadvertently clench your thighs around his head. He moans against you, the vibrations sending pleasure shooting up your spine. You don’t mean to push him closer to you, but you can’t help it. Everything inside you feels like it’s crumbling and coming together at the same time under his ministrations.

You writhe much more than you should, and if it were anyone other than Jaemin, you’d be embarrassed.

“You taste so good,” he groans against you, thrusting his fingers faster. “So beautiful when you drip for me like this.”

He curls his fingers, and you slap a hand over your mouth to muffle your pleasure. One last flick of his tongue on your clit has your back arching, the bubble bursting inside you as you grind into his face.

After he’s helped you ride through your high, you sit up, sending him back a bit. You quickly reach for his pants, squeezing the prominent bulge before undoing the button and zipper. He steps out of them , pulling you toward the edge of the bed.

“We don’t have to,” he says, breathless. “We can wait if you’re not sure.”

“Jaem,” you reply, cupping his cheeks. “I’ve never wanted you more than I do right now.” You tug him down, kissing him with all your might. You taste yourself on him, but it does little to bother you. All you want is him.

His tongue explores your mouth while he finds the clasp of your bra. He pulls it away from you, guiding you back down onto the bed. His kiss trails down once more, stopping at your breast so he can take your nipple into his mouth. He swirls it, teeth gently scraping.

Finally, he’s shoving his underwear down and grabbing a condom from his nightstand. He rolls it on before joining you on the bed once more, and you feel his tip prodding at your entrance.

“You’re absolutely sure?” He pauses, giving as serious of a look as he can muster. “If we do this, you’re mine again, you know that, right?”

“I’ve always been yours, Jaemin,” you remind him, lifting your hips. “That never changed.”

You barely have time to finish your sentence before he’s pushing inside you, face contorting with pleasure as he bottoms out. Heart pounding, you grip onto his shoulders and wrap your legs around his waist.

“You okay?” he whispers, leaning down to kiss your neck. His eyelashes flutter across your skin, your body already slightly sticky from a thin sheen of sweat from your first indescribable high.

“Please move,” you whimper.

Jaemin moves slowly at first, allowing you both to get used to the feeling of being connected again. It’d be a long while since you’d done anything, too. He pants, nipping and sucking at the sensitive part of your throat.

His hips rock steadily, making sure to press as deep as he can every time. You're already a moaning mess below him, holding onto him for dear life.

“I’m sorry,” he says softly. “I’m not gonna last long.”

In response, you tighten your legs around him and flip him over, leaving him on his back and you on top. His eyes trail all over your body. You roll your hips. He sits up, grabbing your waist and pressing your chest against his, his dark, hardened gaze meeting yours as if this is a challenge.

“Lay back,” you tell him, running your hand down the hard planes of his chest as you gently push him back down. “Just watch.”

He gulps, but does as you say. His hands relax on you and he allows you to set your own pace. You lift up, shuddering at how he feels rubbing on your walls. His fingers twitch as if he wants to pull you back down.

“Baby,” he groans.

You set a steady pace, a bit faster than what his was. He traces down your body, leaving goosebumps in his wake as he moves downward until his thumb is pressed to your clit. You bite your lip to stop your moan, leaning back and bracing yourself on his thighs. He’s a mess beneath you, pleasure written across his face. It makes you want to do more, to work harder to bring him to his edge.

You’re so wet, slick sounds of him entering you fill the silence between sounds of euphoria. His thumb glides back and forth so easily, you have to pick up the speed. Everything around you begins to go fuzzy, and you know you’re approaching your second orgasm of the night much faster than you’d like.

Mid-way through your lift-up, your high hits, forcing you back down on his cock to finish with him buried deep inside, stretching you out. He sits back up, guiding you up and down as you slump onto his chest. He meets you halfway, thrusting up as he pulls you down.

He lets out a deep groan and holds you close to him, gently rocking his hips. He gasps for breath, pressing gentle kisses to your shoulder.

“I love you,” Jaemin whispers. “Don’t go again.”

“I’m not going anywhere.” You shake your head. “I love you, too.”

He opens his mouth to say something, but you both frown when you hear the elevator ding.

“Who is that?” you ask, climbing off of him on shaky legs to try and find your clothes.

“Not a clue.” Jaemin frowns, quickly disposing of the condom and putting his underwear and pants back on. He comes back to kiss your cheek. “Stay here. I’ll be right back.”

He walks out into his living room, but you get dressed quickly so you can follow him out. You hear him conversing with someone, but you’re not sure who it is. You’re finally back in your jeans and shirt, so you head out to check out what’s going on.

You know your hairs a mess, your makeup is definitely smeared, and your face is red, and on top of all of that, you’re coming out of Jaemin’s room. Anyone with a brain would see what’s going on.

Chenle moves over to the couch and grabs a purse, which is presumably Yeeun’s, and claps Jaemin on the shoulder before he notices you.

“(Y/N)?” He blinks in surprise, glancing between you and Jaemin. “This is a new development.”

“It’s not really that new,” Jaemin says. “Um, we were kind of…busy, though. If you could…”

“Right.” Chenle shakes his head. “Right. You two have fun. Not too much fun, and make sure no one gets hurt this time, please?”

“Are you going to tell Donghyuck?” You scrunch up your nose.

“I’ll give you a twenty-four hour head start.” He grins, saluting you both. “Take care of each other, dipshits.”

You massage your forehead with a sigh, and Jaemin approaches you.

“You got dressed.” He pouts.

“Well, yeah. Somebody was here.” You chuckle.

“Were you wanting to leave?” he asks, eyebrows furrowing. “It’s okay if you do, I just…thought we’d spend the night together.”

“I don’t want to leave,” you tell him. “I told you I’m not leaving you again, Jaem. I meant it.”

“Then let’s get back to bed.” Jaemin massages your shoulders gently as he guides you back to his room.

He gets you a T-shirt to wear to bed, and once you’ve changed into it, you crawl onto his mattress and wait for him to join you. Instead, he stares at you, a smile on his face.

“I never thought I’d get you like this again.”

“You were always the one for me, Jaemin. It just wasn’t the right time.” You rest your head on one of his pillows, patting the spot next to you. “Now come over here.”

He finally listens, climbing under the comforter and pulling you to him until you’re pressed into his chest.

Kissing the top of your head, he hums. “We’ll have everything we ever wanted.”

[modelbus]

Hi! I absolutely loved the touch starved reader tommy fic and was hoping to request Tommy x reader(fem or gn, whatever ur comfortable with!)who’s an American streamer/yter and they’re doing long distance and haven’t seen each other in a while, so they decide to surprise him and visit him in the uk? Love your fics, have a great day! 🩷

Guess who’s been talking to someone recently :))

Pairing: Cc!Tommyinnit x Gn!Reader

Secret Surprises

“Right guys, now I just have to find my way through this maze of an airport.” You say to your camera, panning it around to show the crowds filling the London airport.

Visiting Tommy, your boyfriend, was always difficult, even if you loved him enough for it to be worth it. The long flight from America to England tended to be turbulence-filled, and the London airport was hell on Earth. Yet you’d still do it every single time.

Someone bumps into you, nearly knocking the camera out of your hands. You curse, fumbling with it before managing to pull it close to your chest. The stranger gives the camera a weird look, but you know by now to ignore the odd looks you get.

“And get an Uber.” You add, already pulling up the app because that seems like the most pressing thing. And you sure as hell weren’t going to try and figure out which side of the road to drive on: you fucked it up once and Tommy never let you live it down.

Luckily, a driver connects with you immediately, leaving you to follow the flow of people to the exit. You get pushed out into a busy road, wind ruffling your hair around.

The good thing about Ubers is that they’re familiar. Worldwide. And that drivers keep their mouths shut when you climb in with a vlog camera and a crazed look in your eye.

Your driver eyes you, then gives a short nod, as if to say, “Airports, am I right?”

You nod back, silently agreeing. Fuck airports, and fuck your love for Tommy that’s making you go through them.

”I’d give you guys a car montage, but doxxing him isn’t on the to-do list, so let’s pretend I’m doing a super cool transition.” You tell the camera, laughing and pausing your recording.

You double check your phone, making sure Tubbo has him stuck at the agreed upon location. It’s just a little arcade near his flat, somewhere he took you last time that you both loved. The perfect place for a little surprise.

Although it’s Tommy, although you know he’ll be happy to see you, your knee bounces against your will. You had planned this perfectly, but what if he changed his schedule and you didn’t know? Not that you’d mind watching him record, but you had bought tickets to a movie the two of you were planning to watch together over discord, among other things.

“This where you need to be?” The driver asks some time later, squinting at the little arcade. Your suitcases are still with you, so he’s probably judging you like crazy, but he’s definitely seen crazier things than you.

“Yup, thank you so much!” You exclaim, ungracefully clambering out of the car after sending a text to Tubbo. In return, the driver grunts at you and drives off. Ah, Uber driver hospitality.

Nothing else like it.

You flip on your camera, zooming in on the arcade doors. “Will we see an elusive Tommyinnit in the wild? Yes, because I orchestrated it, but oooh, mystery.” You whisper, lugging your suitcase behind you. It’s a fairly empty arcade so you don’t have to worry about more weird looks.

After a moments debate, you tuck the thing behind a dance machine—fucking hate those things—and set off for the prize counter where Tubbo promised they’d be.

Over the atrocious lime green carpet, past the bright and loud games. You can’t help eying one of those key games to scope out the prizes although you’ll never play it. You’re stupid, but not that stupid.

A light flickers above you (clearly a good sign), and you step around a racing simulator to see the prize counter. Ropes creating a line up to a glass counter that holds small prizes and shelves that hold larger prizes, you can’t help but grin.

And then your sights land on two familiar figures, and suddenly you’re beaming. You’re here, they’re here, Tommy’s really right there. For a second you just observe, zooming in with your camera and propping it on the racing game for a decent angle.

Even if the footage sucks, you wouldn’t mind. Not with him right there.

“But it’s a jet, Tubbo! Look at it!” Tommy is saying, holding a toy jet up to Tubbo’s camera. So that’s how Tubbo lured him here: a vlog. Ironic.

“But there’s better prizes, Tom. We could pool our tickets for that huge panda!” Tubbo insists, pointing at a large stuffed panda on the shelf. The worker behind the counter gives them a bored look, popping her gum.

“But a jet!”

You quickly make your way up behind Tommy, trying to stay silent.

“You aren’t— listen! We can— we can pool our tickets, and get a cool prize—“ Tubbo is frantically explaining, catching your eye past Tommy’s shoulder.

“I vote for the panda.” You say casually, pointing at the thing.

In front of you, Tommy freezes before whipping around with a stunned expression. “Wha—?”

“Panda.” You repeat patiently, grinning at him.

Tommy throws his game card at Tubbo, practically tackling you in a hug. You laugh as he suffocates you, stumbling backwards into the rope with him.

He’s real under your hands, something tangible that you adore more than anything else. Something solid and true and real and yours. You squeeze him back, arms around his middle.

“How the fuck are you here?” Tommy asks you, tugging you impossibly closer for a chaste kiss. “How the fuck did you keep this secret with your big mouth?”

You slap his arm lightly, laughing loudly. “My mouth isn’t that big, dumbass. Tubbo and I planned this entire thing, didn’t we?”

“Yeah! You had no idea!” Tubbo chimes in. He’s got his camera out, pointed at you and Tommy, for which you send him a thankful smile.

“When did you get here? You’re staying with me, right?” Tommy asks you, a stupid grin that you love on his face. You’re sure there’s a matching one on your face.

“If you’ll let me.” You confirm, letting him wrap his hand around yours. “I also bought tickets to that one movie for tomorrow. I think. The website was really weird about my American card.”

Tommy laughs, and you live in the sound that isn’t diluted by thousands of miles and technology.

“And we have to grab my suitcase.” You add on, because if you forgot it you might die. Along with your camera.

“Your suitcase?” He echoes.

“…It might be behind one of those stupid fucking dance games.”

Even though you’re prepared for his laughter this time, it still sweeps you away. Better than any British or American winds, better than the breeze outside. It sweeps you away like love.

[tashacee]

It’s implied that Time and Aspect!Wild talked to each other about their moon related trauma, what was Time’s reaction to Wild describing the horrors of the blood moon? What was Wild’s reaction to Time talking about his adventure in Termina? How many of The Chain know about Termina?

I’m so curious and desperate to know how that conversation went. Could it maybe even be a short story please?

Look I know this is VERY overdue but i REALLY liked this idea and wanted to do it justice so

Aspects of the Moon

“So.” Time said, shuffling his feet. “The moon, huh?”

“Oh hell no, spooky-boy, you’re talking first, you were accusing me of being a moon-demon ten minutes ago. I deserve to know why.” Wild chuffed as he signed and flicked his tail to show that he wasn’t actually mad. But still. Sure, he’d spill his own moon trauma, but he absolutely deserved to hear Time’s first.

The old man sighed, raking a hand through his hair.

“Uh…” he said. “I… guess that’s fair.” he sighed and shook his head. “It… it’s really weird. You probably won’t believe me.”

“I came back from the dead. Multiple times.” Wild deadpanned.

Time chuckled. “I mean when you put it like that.” he laughed. “Fine. You win. So… when I was a kid. A real kid. Well. Sort of. I was ten, but it was after my first adventure, which took around two years all things considered, so I was also kind of twelve? But yeah, I was ten.”

“Time, what the fuck?” Wild held up his hands, blinking. “Were you ten or twelve, this isn’t that hard?”

Time snorted. “I’m the Hero of Time, Wild. It really is that hard. Now stop interrupting, this is my trauma I’m talking about here.”

Wild rolled his eyes jokingly, but waved for him to continue.

“Okay so. I fell into a tree and woke up in another world, called Termina. And everyone in Termina was freaking out ‘cause the moon was about to crash into the ground and kill them all. Actually that’s not true. A lot of them weren’t freaking out, they had other issues, which seemed a little short-sighted of them, but who am I to judge? Anyway, the moon kept getting closer - it had a face, by the way. The moon did. Big angry face. Very freaky -and after three days it crashed into the earth and killed everyone. So I rewound time to see if I could stop it. Um. It took a lot of times. Couple of years worth of three day cycles, but like, I kept resetting myself too so I was still ten. And then eventually I fought the moon and escaped. But yeah. That’s. That’s my issue with the moon.”

Wild stared at him.

“Time, what the fuck?”

“I did tell you the biggest thing I ever fought was the moon.���

“Yeah but I thought you were joking!”

“Clearly.”

“Fuck!”

“Yep.”

Wild nodded slowly, staring into the darkness of the woods around him. That was… wow. That was a lot. No wonder Time has issues. If even half of that was true - and Wild had no reason to doubt his brother’s word - then it was frankly astounding that he was functional at all.

“Okay. so.” Time leaned back against a tree. “What’s your story? Why do you hate the moon.”

Oh yeah. That had been the deal, hadn’t it. Time had told his sstory, so now Wild would tell his.

Ugh.

He shrugged.

“Not as dramatic as yours.” he admitted. “In my journeys - both of them, actually - every full moon rose red and Ganon’s power waxed in the air. His evil became visible rising from the ground and at the stroke of midnight, every monster that had been slain returned to life at once. You could hear them howl through the night all at once. It sucked serious ass.”

Time stared at him.

“All of the monsters?”

“Yep.”

“Even - even the big ones?”

“Sure did. Full moons… I don’t trust em.”

“No shit! No wonder you hate them!”

“Word.”

“Fuck.”

They sat in silence for a moment, both thinking about each others’ respective moon traumas. Then Wild pulled out his slate, flicked through a few sections, and pulled out his strongest bottle of whiskey, offering it to Time.

“Fuck the moon, amirite?”

Time grinned, accepting it. “Yeah. Fuck the moon!”

[writtenonreceipts]

Even More Random Prompts

Some may be similar to each other, I tried to play off of the prompts to create more of the same vein.  Shrugs maybe not the best list, but I think it’s fun. Please do not repost. Reblogs welcome.

find other prompts here

I can explain.  This isn’t as bad as it looks.

Sometimes bad decisions are the only ones we’ve got.

Rise and shine, it’s time for the worst day of your life.

I’ll bring the vodka, you bring the bad decisions.

Well, no one told me that.

No, we are not keeping the cat.

It’s too early for this.

Is that coffee?

It’s five in the morning, did you expect a warm welcome?

Sorry, all I can provide is sarcasm.

Look at that dog.  We need  it.

You’re trying to kill me, aren’t you?

You’ve got to be kidding me.

I promise, that was an accident.

Is that a flip phone?

I’m being crafty, shut-up.

There is no such thing as too much glitter.

I have a glue gun and I’m not afraid to use it.

Give me all the dogs, I don’t care.

I need a blowtorch, a roll of duct tape, and marshmallows.

Let’s go on an adventure.

Please tell me you know how to change a tire.

Is that band-aid pink? // With unicorns. // That’ll do.

Wake up asshat, we’ve got crimes to do.

How do you manage to trip over everything?

Here, let me help.

Don’t worry, it’s going to be alright.

Didn’t you meet them on the internet?

Your cat is a judgmental bitch.

I can’t even keep a goldfish alive, how can I handle this?

Let’s make some mistakes.

How about a drink? // Of alcohol or rat poison?

Under no circumstances are you to talk about politics, religion, or your favorite ice cream flavor.

We are in the trenches of a family reunion--survival is the only thing that matters.

Whoever said ignorance is bliss never had anxiety.

What do you mean you don’t know how to ride a bike?

For the record, I totally would have helped with that.

Why would anyone live here?

Have a sticker for your troubles.

Don’t call me that.

You’ve got something on your face.

Can you zip this for me?

What are you wearing?

I don’t know what I was expecting, but this wasn’t it.

Fine then, I won’t say anything.

That was a wonderful accident.

It’s Monday.  Again.

Time is funny like that, it really likes screwing me over.

They’re an artist without a canvas

That’s a lot of caffeine.

Well, that’s a little disturbing.

How much have you had to drink?

I only have one love, and that is mozzarella sticks.

So, where were you planning on getting the tattoo?

I thought you hate needles. // Yes, but I like spiting my family more, I’m getting the damn tattoo

You need me more than you hate me.

A lot of people want to kill me.  I am very proud of that.

This is the worst day of my life.

C’mon, it’s just family dinner, how bad could it be?

Please don’t kill me, I have a good reason for this.

Care to explain the glitter lotion?

I supported the entire self tanning industry when I was a teen.

I don’t trust myself with this information.

Why do you always choose violence?

My car, my rules. We’re listening to Nickleback whether you like it or not.

Yeah, the vase of dead roses really says a lot.

That’s not a cat that’s a skunk.

I brought your favorite ice cream.

Well you're about as delightful as a kidney stone.

Who the hell are you?

What do you want from me?

Hold on, I’ve got handcuffs in my purse.

Ugh, why are you covered in cheap cologne?

I’m not wearing the right shoes for this.

I’m not the one who paid three hundred dollars for a shirt.

I wanted to buy you flowers.

When a child hands you a rock, you have to accept it.

I’m sorry and I’ll never stop apologizing.

I miss you.

Wait for me, I’ll be home soon.

Are you sure about this?

Please? I brought pizza.

I’m sorry, I never meant to hurt you.

Wait.  Please, don’t go?

I just hope you can forgive me.

And they say dropping out of college is a bad thing

Can your fancy degree do this?

I was only arrested one time…The second I got off on a technicality

I cry at any hint of affection

Don’t judge them, they’re just really, really hungry

Is that a clown?

Why is there a llama in the yard?

I know how this looks, but it was not my fault.

Therapy’s too expensive, eat some chocolate.

Would I really lie to you? // Yes.

The last time I trusted you you killed my succulent plant.

How much caffeine have I had?--I’d rather not answer that.

Stabbing people is not a proper expression of emotion.

That was not what I was expecting to happen.

Sorry, I just need seventy years to recover from the embarrassment.

[fiber-optic-alligator]

I would love to see some TFA swindle soft vore with a Gn!human <3

Thanks for the request, anon! Here it is! TFA Swindle is so silly, I love how funky he looks. Just a fun salesman who definitely has never broken any laws :D

Deal Or No Deal

Pairing: TFA Swindle x Gn!human Reader

WARNING: This story contains soft vore. If this makes you uncomfortable, please do not read this story.

Word Count: 3230

Summary: After accepting a job as an errand runner for a local arms dealer, you are tasked with sneaking into a warehouse located in an old Detroit harbor freight yard and stealing a piece of Decepticon weaponry. Things go wrong when a certain money-hungry mech catches you red-handed and decides he is in charge of you’re fate.

You hate your job.

  “It’ll be quick and easy.” You quietly hype yourself up as you walk past various decrepit buildings, your steps bouncing off of their walls and echoing around you, creating an ominous phenomenon in which it sounds like someone is following in your wake. Too many times you’ve glanced back just to make sure your imagination was simply running wild and you were truly alone.

  “Just get in, find the piece, and get out.” You reach into your pants pocket and pull out the crumpled map of the freight yard. This part of the harbor is an unsavory neighborhood, too dated to be put to use, yet too expensive to gut and start anew. Thus, it’s trapped in a standstill, with local black market meetings happening frequently and without a hitch. Illegal materials are typically stored here too, due to the perfect real estate; not even the police are aware of how important this place really is.

  Tonight, you will be finding one of those exact materials…and you will be stealing it.

  “No problem. It’s no problem.” You study the map one last time, then tuck it away. “Find the prize. Get it to the boss. Easy. It’ll be fine.”

  You aren’t a thief. Well, you weren’t a thief until now. But you're low on cash, and the threat of going broke is just too high. You don’t want to be out on the streets, so you went down a rough road: you’ve become an errand runner for hire. A local arms dealer wants you to smuggle an extremely powerful weapon out of the freight yard and into his hands. “It’s nothing I’ve ever seen before,” he had told you. “A cannon left behind by those Cybertronian-whatevers. It’s alien. And I want it.”

  The amount of money he offered to pay you was too much for you to resist. So here you are, against your better judgment, robbing one horrible person for the benefit of another.

  Well, you don’t know if this other person you're stealing from is horrible. The only information given to you about them was where they keep their goods. But judging from the fact that they’re directly contributing to Detroit’s crime rate, you have to assume they’re pretty terrible.

  And so am I. You wince when you think about it. I’m no better. I’m a coward who can’t even land a real job.

  No time to pity yourself. You chose this profession. There’s no chance for you to go back on it. At least after you complete this job, maybe you can return to some semblance of a normal life…if you aren’t arrested and sent to prison, that is.

  The warehouse you are looking for sits right on the edge of the harbor. It’s massive, with shoddy wooden walls riddled with graffiti and sheets of cheap metal nailed to cover up holes. Standing before it now, you feel a shiver go down your spine. Definitely the creepiest place in Detroit, this building is.

  Drawing in a deep breath, you head for the large sliding doors. One of them is just barely open. It’s enough space for you to slip through.

  Inside, it’s dark. There are lights above, but there is no sign of a switch, and even if there was, you doubt they’d turn on. The warehouse is filled with giant boxes: crate after crate stacked upon each other, some of them reaching so high, you have to wonder just who the hell is in charge of this operation. It’s quiet. You remain still, holding your breath to listen for any signs of activity, like guards or people bringing in recent shipments.

  Nothing.

  Somehow, that causes you to be on edge even more.

  You really, really hate your job.

  According to your employer, the Cybertronian weapon is stored in a special crate marked with a Decepticon insignia. It’s one of a kind, so it should be relatively easy to find. You just have to hope it can be reached. As you tread lightly through the warehouse and peer up at the towers of storage, you're suddenly afraid you might have your first experience with using a forklift tonight.

  Thankfully, luck seems to be on your side. You come across the crate quickly; it’s set up in the corner of the building, nestled between other boxes so it can be obscured. You only spot it because you know what you're looking for. The Decepticon symbol peeks out at you revealingly, like it wants to be found.

  Jackpot, you think. Pushing the other boxes away, you grab your crowbar from your belt and wedge it between the crate’s cover.

  For a moment, you pause. A nervous idea of this possibly being a trap crosses your mind, but then you dismiss it. There’s no way anyone could have known you were coming. You and your boss were alone that night when you discussed this plan. Grunting, you force the crate open. Wood cracks as the cover springs up. Excitement fills you when you eagerly peek inside.

  Your heart drops.

  There’s nothing there. It’s empty.

  “Nononono.” You frantically sift your hands through the packing peanuts, but to no avail. The crate is devoid of anything but styrofoam.

  You stumble back dazedly and press your hand to your head. This is a trap. Someone did know you were coming. But how? And who?

  Low, steady thumping answers you.

  It sounds like footsteps. No, they are footsteps. Heavy, boot-like pounding against the floor is accompanied by a large shadow casting over you. Suddenly, the warehouse lights blaze on. You have to shield your eyes to avoid earning a headache.

  “Well, well, well,” a voice says. “What do we have here?”

  You blink and lower your hands. Standing in front of you, towering above the stacks of crates, is a giant robot with dull golden armor and purple eyes. He gives you an easygoing smile and speaks with the same smooth voice you heard before. “And why might you be here, little mouse?”

  You gape at him with no words you can say. The robot chuckles and crosses his arms over his chest. “Didn’t find what you were looking for?” He inclines his head to the crate. “Don’t beat yourself up about it, it’s not your fault. I knew your boss was going to make a move for the cannon way before he decided to send you for it.”

  “I-I-uh-” you stammer.

  “Yes?” he asks.

  “G-Giant…r-robot.”

  His smile widens and he raises a brow. “That’s what I am. The proper term would be Cybertronian, though.”

  “Y-You're one of them.” Your eyes flicker to the scowling symbol on his chest. “You're a Decepticon.”

  “Technically, yes. However, I consider myself a Decepticon in name only. I wear this badge as a sign of partnership with my best customers.”

  “Customers?” you echo.

  “Right. Guess I should introduce myself.” The mech extends his arms in an open greeting. “The name’s Swindle. I run a tight business of weapons selling, weapons building, weapons trading…basically, if you want something that’ll make your enemies go boom, I’m the guy you want to call. And you, little mouse, are currently stealing from me.”

  You look around you. “Wait. So this…all of this…is yours?”

  “Yup. It’s quite the haul, isn’t it? This loot is going to be spread all across Detroit to different buyers, Cybertronian or not. I don’t discriminate, you see. If you have the means to pay for it, I can get it for you. Earth is a violent place, little mouse. And where there’s violence, there’s money to be made.”

  A compartment slides open from his chest. He reaches into it and pulls out a large gray cannon with the Decepticon coat of arms on its side. “This is what you came here for, right?” Swindle says. “Your boss wants it so he can blast a bunch of banks open.”

  You swallow hard and nod.

  “Let me ask you this.” He drops the cannon back in. The compartment closes, and he crouches down to get more on your level. “Do you think I like it when people steal from me?”

  “I-I didn’t steal from you!” you answer.

  “You were going to.”

  “But I didn’t!”

  “You had the intention, and that counts.” He shrugs. “I’m what you humans call a cool cat, kid. I do business and I go on with my life. But when I find little mice snooping around my warehouse, trying to take things that don’t belong to them…” His gaze darkens and he bares his teeth. “I decide it’s time to show my claws.”

  You take a nervous step back. “I-I’m sorry! I really am! But I had no choice! I-I need this job! I need the money!”

  For a moment, he simply studies you. Then he leans back into the calm attitude from before, and grins. “Hm. What if I were to offer you a deal?”

  It takes you a moment to register what he just said. “A deal?” you say. “Why would you want to make a deal with me? I just tried stealing from you!”

  “I know. Trust me, I’m not letting you off the hook. But I find myself feeling bad for you, little mouse. You're just someone who’s down on your luck and trying to get back on your feet. I appreciate that. And…I see potential in you.”

  “…Potential?”

  His eyes sparkle with dangerous intent. “Yes. Potential. You're small. Quick. You can sniff things out and have a great sense of direction while doing it. I could use someone like you. A stealthy little robber who can sneak in and get things that a giant lumbering robot can’t. Do you see where I’m going with this?” He pokes you gently in the ribs. You yelp and jump back. “I’m offering you a job.”

  You rub your side and glare at him. “I already have a job.”

  “Correction. You had a job.” Swindle tilts his head. “If you go back to your boss empty-handed, you’ll suffer for it. I know how he works, and trust me, what he does to those who fail isn’t pretty. But me? I’m fair. I’m lenient. Your work hours won’t kill you, and I’m not going to dump your dead body into the lake if something goes sour. This is an opportunity for you. What do you say?” He holds his hand out. “Do we have a deal?”

  You eye his hand apprehensively, then take another step back. “No. I’m done with this. I never wanted to be a thief. I’m not working for a giant robot who can kill me at any chance.”

  He throws his hands up, exasperated. “Did you not hear a word I just said?”

  “I don’t care what you said!” You turn on your heel and march away. “What my boss does to me doesn’t matter anymore! I’m not going through with this sort of life!”

  Swindle sighs, and his tone hardens. “Ah, geez, you're going to make me be the bad guy, huh. Alright, fine, I can be the bad guy.”

  You let out a strangled shriek when you are unexpectedly yanked into the air. Swindle unceremoniously lifts you up by the back of your shirt, bringing you close to his face. “Listen, mouse,” he growls. “You have two options to choose tonight: either you agree to work for me, or I can sell you to other people who are worse than your boss. You want to end up collared and turned into a Decepticon’s pet?”

  You stop your desperate struggle to stare at him in horror. “Y-You wouldn’t do that!”

  “Wouldn’t I? I’m a daytrader, little one. I may specialize in weapons, but that doesn’t mean I don’t take up animal handling once in a while.” He shakes you a little, earning a cry from you. “So, what’s it going to be? This is a limited time offer, so you better make up your mind while it lasts.”

  You stare at him, and you know he’s being completely serious. You have no option here except to agree to his terms. A pit forms in your stomach with roots of anxiety spreading through you, thriving on your fear. He notices how you’ve begun to shake, and grins with the knowledge that he has you.

He holds his hand out to you once more. “I’ll ask again. Do we have a deal?”

  You hesitate…then reluctantly extend your own hand to him. He takes your palm between his index finger and thumb and shakes it gently. “There.” Swindle looks satisfied. “Was that so hard? You’ve made the right choice, little mouse. Now, for your punishment.”

  “Wait, what?” You yank your hand back. “Punishment? What punishment!?”

  “The punishment.” He says this like it’s common knowledge. “You tried to steal from me. I just can’t let that go. What kind of message would I be spreading to the competition if they were to know I’m too soft with thieves?”

  “But I accepted your terms! I work for you now! What more could you want from me?”

  He tsks and shakes his head. “This has nothing to do with the deal, little mouse. This has everything to do with the fact that your old boss thinks I’m someone he can send his cronies to steal from.” He lifts you higher, and his gaze softens, only for a moment. “Don’t worry. I’m not going to hurt you. You're still a greenie in the trade, so there’s no reason to draw this out. Just relax and everything will be fine.”

  You squirm and clutch at the fingers holding you, confused. “What are you-?”

  He opens his mouth. You find yourself staring down into the abyss of his throat, pulsing with a gentle purple light. Then your eyes widen and your heart crashes when he begins lowering you towards it.

  WHAT ARE YOU DOING?” you yell while you squirm, kick, flail, do anything you can to fight back against what you realize is happening. “PUTMEDOWNPUTMEDOWNPUTMEDOWNPUTMEDOWN!”

  You couldn’t tear your eyes away from the gaping jaws below you. Swindle’s tongue shifts with excitement and anticipation. The sight makes you scream until you think your own throat might bleed.

  The more you fight, the faster Swindle lowers you. You curse and threaten, so terrified that you aren’t even aware of what you are saying at this point, fresh tears pouring down your face.

“SWINDLE, PLEASE, DON’T-!”

  You break into a scream when he drops you.

  The impact is softer than what you brace for, and you fall onto his tongue with an “Oof.” For a moment, you lay there, little cries coming out with your rapid-tempo breaths, heart beating so hard you think you may have a heart attack.

  And then you come to your senses, and realize where you are.

  You are in Swindle’s mouth.

  You scramble forward, moving to throw yourself out of the sticky deathtrap, but it is too late; the robot’s teeth click closed, cutting you off from the outside world. “Nonono!” You bang your fists frantically on them. “Please, let me out! I don’t want to die! P-Please don’t do this!”

  Hot air wafts over your body when Swindle chuckles. The muscle beneath you moves and begins to slowly push you backwards. Thick globs of saliva suck at your legs as you are forced back towards his throat.

  “No, stop!” You claw at his tongue, trying everything in your power to prevent yourself from going down. The giant tilts his head back.

  With a loud squelching gulp, Swindle swallows, and you are sucked into his esophagus, the powerful muscles pulling you down.

  So many things happen at once. Your body is massaged from all sides by the throat, leaving you all but completely immobile. The sound of Swindle’s internal workings is thunder in your ears, so loud that you can’t even hear yourself think.

  The most terrifying noise, however, is the growling and gurgling coming from below. An ominous reminder of where you are ultimately going to end up.

  You are squeezed into the stomach and fall into the squishy chamber that, as soon as it is aware of your presence, closes in. From all sides you are massaged and kneaded by thick, muscular walls of synthetic organ that rubs saliva and fluid all over you. You push at the walls with a terrified air of desperation, your lungs constricting like you can’t breathe. “Let me out!” you beg your captor. “Please, I don’t want this!”

  Swindle rumbles out another chuckle that sounds so much deeper now that you are in here. The walls quiver, laughing right along with him. “I don’t care what you want, little mouse. I’m your boss now, and I want you to sit in there and think about what you’ve done.”

  “I’m sorry! I’m sorry for trying to steal from you! Just please, spit me up! I-I don’t want to die!” Your voice breaks. The situation is truly hopeless now.

  Swindle groans. “Geez, how many times do I have to tell you, kid? You're not going to die. Do you feel any acid in there? Is your skin melting off of your bones?”

  You pause and look at your arms. The glow of the mech’s biolights gives you a dim image of your limbs: sticky and slimy…but not in any pain, and certainly no terrible wounds visible.

  “…No,” you mumble in disbelief.

  Swindle speaks to you like a parent does with their child. “See? You're in no pain. Nothing bad is going to happen to you. You're safe. Now relax and settle down.”

  “If I’m safe, then why did you decide to eat me?!”

“I already said this. You need to learn a lesson. A few hours in there will teach you not to steal from others…well, at least, not to steal from me. You’ll be doing plenty of theft in the future. But I’ll pay you for it, and you’ll never have to worry about going hungry or living on the streets ever again.”

  Your fear begins to diminish, and it’s replaced with indignation. “Of all the ways to teach me a lesson, it had to be like this?”

  The stomach shakes boisterously when Swindle laughs. “Sorry, kid. I had to scare the crap out of you somehow so you’d learn. You need to know your place in this profession.” He presses his hands right over where you are tucked inside and gives you a little squeeeze. “Now sit tight and relax for me, okay? I’ll let you out in a few hours. You're safe.”

  You grumble and give the stomach walls a disgruntled shove. The organ flexes to hug you, forcing you to sink into the warmth. Now that you’ve calmed down, you find that it’s actually…kind of nice in here. The constant massaging feels good on your exhausted body. The soft violet glow is soothing to your eyes. And though you hate to allow yourself, because you're still rather pissed off with him…you finally relax.

  “There you go,” he murmurs. “That’s right. Nice and warm.” The walls ripple when he gives his abdomen a pat. “You know, I think this is going to be the start of a beautiful friendship.”

  You give in and release a soft breath. You’ve gotten yourself into quite the pickle here. But with how warm it is, and relaxed you are…maybe working for this robot won’t be so bad.

[thewayuarent]

About choices

And about Sand’s choices mostly

(there are spoilers to the next episode in here if you try to avoid them)

I found myself using the word pathetic to describe literally any character in this show by that point and while I do it ironically I think it doesn’t fit for me anymore. I’m also way far to be the only one using it especially when discussion is about Sand.

And the thing is - I don’t think he’s pathetic about Ray. I also think after this episode that I’m actually really proud of him. And while I have that very uneasy feeling every time I watch Sand yielding to Ray - I work hard to find my peace with it and be fine with that.

Because he’s making his choice and it’s not my place to judge him for that. Because I don’t want to do with Sand the same exact thing Top and Cheum do with Mew - questioning his life choices and blame them on Ray. Because Sand is an adult and he has a right to make his own decisions.

This episode is actually the first time I see Sand being honest about his feelings with Ray. This scene right here - is about Sand admitting his feelings.

Maybe he doesn’t say it as it is, he still uses sarcasm cause of course he would - but he also clearly hurt and he doesn’t hide it away as usual. This is also the moment I believe Ray realizes for the first time that he means something for Sand.

And after that conversation, after him not responding to messages and staying his ground, the next thing is he’s being smitten with Ray again.

And it’s so fucking understandable. He’s not pathetic. He’s just in love. And he allows himself that moment of weakness just because he wants to spend this time or more time with Ray. Simple as that.

And after that absolutely gross terrible shit Ray has an audacity to tell in his face - Sand is still here.

And it’s not only about him helping Ray with cops. Cause this one understandable as hell at least for me. Police brutality is not a fun thing to experience at all (I experienced it ones after anti-war protest and I live in Russia so I know that shit). And no matter how angry I am at someone I won’t let them get through it alone, I will help them in situation like this absolutely. And I would definitely not let an addict with severe mental illness get to a fucking jail, are you kidding me? Even Top was like nope and he hates Ray.

Even if we all know that this is way more dangerous for Sand, cause Ray has money while Sand doesn't. Even if I think the right choice for Sand would be thinking about himself not Ray here just for a reason of being save - I would do the same thing. I spend one night in jail as a queer person and I still have a PTSD 1,5 year later. I know it was an impulse from Sand I know it's fucking dangerous and he's risking everything. I know it's stupid thing to do - and still I do not judge him for that.

But this is also about the next week preview. This is about Sand forgiving Ray once more. Giving him another chance. And the answer to the question “How will they end up like this after that disaster of a party?” - well, it’s because that what Sand wants. (And Ray also wants it obviously but we’re not asking him here, he’s sitting in a corner thinking about his behavior)

And the important thing here is - Ray is not the only one Sand gives this chance to. He gives it to himself also. And this is about him as much as about Ray. Because Sand was hurt before. And he closed up after that. And he only now allows himself to be honest with Ray for the first time. It not even as much in this conversation

- cause he’s probably doesn’t have the best control of his emotions so it can be unintentionally.

It’s this one we haven’t seen yet.

He lets himself be honest. And that means he gets himself an opportunity to feel and maybe to be happy but also to be hurt again. And this is a good thing, actually.

Because this is how life works. You can either choose to guard yourself or risk it without knowing for sure where it brings you.

And maybe it won’t last long. Maybe it’s only for a brief moment when they physically move themselves away from the reality - but it does count. And those moments? They matter as much as bad ones.

I personally do believe they are eventually doomed by narrative - and not because of love triangle or Ray's addiction, but because of the clear power imbalance this relationship build on. But while it's my personal belief, it's clearly not Sand's, at least in the moment. And it's his right to allow himself this chance - himself, not Ray.

Sand does deserve better. Yes, absolutely. He deserves to be loved and respected (you hear me Ray? I said respected) and not played around. People say it all over again and I’m definitely one of them. But the reality is, love is not only about what we deserve. And it’s not even only about what we feel. It’s about what we choose. And why it’s not for everyone to understand why Sand chooses Ray, it’s not our place to judge. It’s his choice. So if that what he wants I will support him.

The only boundary Sand semi-successfully holds is not being the second choice. He doesn’t let Ray do that to him - and it seems like he won’t in a future. And this is important cause it shows that Sand doesn’t completely betray who he is for Ray.

For all the other things - Ray saying (every time while being wasted as hell) things that probably for many people unforgivable - and I do respect that - well, Sand forgives him. And it doesn’t make him weak or stupid. It makes him who he is.

I was there before more than I would like to. My father is an alcoholic and sometimes when he’s drunk he says terrible things. It’s complicated cause he never allows himself this when he’s sober. And I know that alcohol doesn’t makes him different person, it’s still him. But I also know that condition brings worst in him. Things he actively fights all the time but that are still there. And when he’s sober - sometimes he apologizes. Sometimes he doesn’t remember. I choose to forgive him every time - not only for him but for myself. Does it makes me weak? I don’t think so.

Ray’s addiction is not his whole personality, but it’s a big part of who he is and it explains - not excuses - a lot about how he behaves. And being with addicted person is hard and exhausting and it’s not for everyone. It’s a personal choice - there’s no right or wrong here. Sand makes his.

Love is always about choice. And it’s not only about Sand, actually. It’s about all of them.

Mew doesn’t deserve being cheated on but it’s his choice to forgive Top or not, not ours. And my bet he will.

Top and Boston don’t deserve their sex being recorded and released but it’s up to them if they forgive anyones involved. And my bet they will. Top already running after Mew and Boston continues to add himself in this friend group, so they are already partially there.

Ray doesn’t deserve being dragged around by Mew to be his revenge supply, but it’s his choice to play along. And yes, he’s not that stupid, he clearly knows Mew’s reasoning.

Nick doesn’t deserve being betrayed by Sand, but he made a choice to forgive him and stay friends with him and trust him again anyway.

And this list is endless, this is just some examples. They all do messed up stuff to each other, hurt each other and then move on. They could honestly stop any relationship any character has with others but they all are still here. They won't be forever, probably, but for now, yes, and it's their rigth. This is how we’re growing up.

Sand knows exactly how Ray is. He’s not deceived about it. He sees Ray for what Ray is - all good and bad and charming and struggling parts of his personality. He actually always knew and he falls for Ray being himself not some pretty image of him. He knows Ray is far from perfect. He knows Ray doesn't respect him - he was there being called a whore and again with this stupid possesive rant. He was hurt by Ray way more than once.

And he perfectly rigth saying they have nothing in common - they are from different worlds and they always will.

But he's wrong about it at the same time. Cause it’s music, and also parental issues, and the ability to have fun with each other. It’s also Ray saying he’s in his happiest with Sand

which is absolutely mutual in their good moments. It’s about freedom they find in each other - Ray from his pain and Sand from his exhausting daily routine. It’s also about their shared need to be needed. It's not enough for stable relationship cause their differences are way bigger, but that's enough for him to be willing to give it a try.

Their bond is not healthy or romantic but it still deserves a chance to be. And I love how this show never tries to romanticize any of it. It’s always a complex mix of feelings because they are in wrongs so many times and every time you feel like it’s enough but this moment is still not here. And one minute they are broken but the next they are happy and then broken again and this is how life works.

They are so, so young and it’s not only about age (cause I’m not that much older than them but honestly I remember myself in 22 and I was a whole different person) but also about the amount of experience they have in their lives. About the dynamics they have and patterns they are stuck in. And this is always about getting this new experience and it’s not pleasant all the time but there are still moments when it is.

As for Sand - he’ll be alright. He is alright honestly. He’s not fooling himself into believing that his love will “fix” Ray. He’s just there both for Ray and for himself. And about what Sand deserves? He deserves exactly that, because that is what he wants. He deserves it for the sake of learning and feeling and growing up thanks to that experience.

He doesn’t need to be saved from Ray simply because he made his choice. Because it's not about Sand patheticly falling for Ray's needs.

It's about Sand meeting his own.

And while it not necessary to agree with him, or understand him, it's at least worth an acceptence.

[bloomed-night-flower]

DO YOU REMEMBER THE TIME, WHEN WE FELL IN LOVE?

DO YOU REMEMBER THE TIME ,THAT WE FIRST MET?

Twst :A. Ashengrotto

Tr: S. Sano

Reader: G/n!

Note:

Personal Note: Guess who’s back 😝😝😝My once in a year resurrection has come. I was originally gonna do mitsuya to but I knew in the end I wouldn’t + its 2 am when I’m finishing this up

For twst Y/n is not Mc in the game 👍 Also they might be reckless as hell💀🫡 I did not have my info notes on Azul’s personality so uhhh out of character probably but every fictional character is out of character most of the timing so hey🤷‍♀️

For TR you’re Keisuke’s sibling for shin’s part 😝

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

Character: Azul Ashengrotto

When we first met

Such a nice normal day, the sun is slowly setting, people picking up their stuff to take back home from the beach. Some people are cleaning up trash. Kids running around, and a kid trying to eat a fistful of sand with some shells in them. Yep, the typical shit here.

You’re the kid who’s eating sand here. You tried putting the sand into your mouth before someone stopped you. It was one of the adults here with you. She was a supervisor for your class who was on a trip to the beach just looking at the sea animals and playing. I mean she it's your Kindergarten’s graduation to the Grade School… Your sibling has told you about it before and you weren’t going to enjoy it for sure.

The supervisor walks away from you to take care of some kids and focuses on the ocean. Suddenly you see about a few human bodies in the water. One of the bodies seemed to be more of a purplish tint than the others which seemed to have more natural colors. The natural colored ones kept pushing the purplish tinted one towards the shore. You observe them quietly till you pick up a rock and go into the water a bit to get a better aim. You aim the rock towards one of the kids bullying the other. You managed to hit one of the kids in the side which made the kid flinch in response.

The other kids quickly disappeared into the water leaving the kid they were bullying alone and frightened. You motion the purple tinted kid to come over to you but he seems too scared. You sigh and take off the jacket you had worn over your swimming outfit and try paddling your little feet over to him while keeping your jacket above you knowing your mother would be mad if it came back wet.

The boy seemed not to move, still probably shaken up but once you reached him you could kind of notice something about him. His lower half seemed to be fading into black and once you reached closer to him you could feel something slimy and squishy around your legs.He seemed a bit chubby, but you kinda found that nice though. If you’re chubby then there’s more of you to love. It seemed the boy snapped out of his shocked state because he suddenly yelped from your guy's sudden contact.

“AH! Don’t hurt me please!”

“Huh? Why would I hurt you, I don’t get it?”

“D-Don’t humans hate merfolks?”

The water around you seemed to darken a bit into a fainter black color now

“Huh? Why would we, I mean I know some people do but I don’t really mind. OH! If you’re a sea folk, what kind are you?”

“W-What do you mean”

The kid seemed to fumble with his chubby fingers a bit

“I mean what type are you? Are you those normal cool ones that have cool sea animal features?!”

The boy seemed a bit startled from your enthusiasm but answered none the less.

“I guess I’m the ones with sea animal features?”

“Oooo, what animal?”

“O-Oh an octopus”

The boy started to worry thinking you’d judge him but oh to his surprise your face lit up even more with excitement.

“WOAH! That’s so cool! So do you have tentacles? Can I see them? Oh wait! Show me what you can do please!”

The boy felt surprised from the amount of questions you asked and just simply nodded and showed you one of his tentacles.

“Can I touch it?”

He nods and to use one hand to poke at it.

“It feels so squishy, is that normal?”

“Yes, if it's out of water it gets dry and I can’t really move it around till it's back in water.”

The boy seemed to be getting comfortable with you, he even told you his name, Azul. You two continued to talk until yellings was heard.

“HEY! Y/N its time to go home with the other kids!”

You start to swim a bit away until the boy grabs you arm

“Wait, can we meet again, please. You’re the only person I can consider a friend.”

“Hmm? Sure, I’ll try to visit next week.”

“You promise?”

“I promise”

When we fell in love

Tenth grade is your literal personal hell. Well you hate school in general. But hey the upside is that it’s near the last day of school. And well hell wouldn’t you have guessed you’re going on a field trip again to the beach. You walk with your group that the teachers have assigned you but you’re a bit further away from them since well you don’t know them personally and don’t want to interrupt their little group talk.

Then the supervisor of your guys group taps your shoulder.

“Y/n, do you mind trying to at least talk with the group a bit?”

You shrug slightly and all the supervisor could do was sigh.

“Just stay close to them, okay?”

“Yeah”

You follow the group slightly but then slightly distracted when you spot something in the sand. You squat down and dig the sand off it. You had found what seemed to be a coin. It wasn’t a coin you’ve seen around before so there was no telling its worth.

‘Maybe I should give this to Azul. Oh wait, can’t I visit him right now? Wait but the supervisor said not to split away from the group.’

You pondered for a bit and finally thought it’d be fine for you to go. You look around and see that the group you were assigned with was busy getting some souvenirs so you took this time to get up and go to your usual meet up spot with him, which was surprisingly the same beach you’re at right now.

You go into a somewhat secluded cave though going deeper into the cave there’s a medium sized hole filled with the ocean’s water with a faint blue light shining underneath. Moss is slightly covered around the hole. You’ve been learning a bit of animal language so you’ve been putting thay to use for your and Azul’s communication. You called out for a fish to notify Azul to meet up with you.

As you waited a couple of minutes suddenly a lump of little purple hair was seeable.

“Azul!”

“Y/n, why’d you ask for me to come to our spot?

“Look what I found.”

You show him the coin that was slightly dirty. The coin had a beautiful design with vines circling a beautiful flower that had four petals on it. It looked as if the flower was planted in the sand and the flowers flowed up looking as if it was supposed to be underwater.

“It’s for your collection!”

Azul’s eyes widen in joy, but tries to hide it by grunting a bit, as he takes the coin from your hand, holds it underwater and starts trying to rub off the dirt on the coin. Not all of the dirt rubbed off but you can see the flower more clearly now.

“You like it?”

“Yes, I like it Y/n”

Azul slightly smirks as he fiddles with the coin a bit. Azul’s mind starts to drift off a bit with how you had thought about him and what he would like. His mind starts to think about ever since you both had first secretly met you’ve been one of those few people who genuinely care or find interest in. He starts to feel his heartbeat slightly faster when he keeps thinking about you, the way you keep yourself composed to the way you express yourself. He feels his cheeks slightly heat it up.

“Hey Azul~? You okay, you spaced out”

“Oh! Uhh, yes I’m just thinking about some contracts I made.”

“Really? Can you-“

“Y/n! Where are you!”

The supervisor’s voice was recognizable as ever as they called out for you. Their voice filled with worry.

“Oh, looks like it's my cue to go, see you soon Azul!”

You waved by quickly as you stood up hastily as you left the cave. Azul slowly sinks back into the water as you leave and holds the coin close to his chest as his heart beats faster. He stares at it in awe as a soft smile spreads. He lets out a giddy giggle as his tentacles wave around happily.

He swam back into the deeper parts of the water (Probably to tell his mother) as the sunshine slowly left as the sunset died down and the sky was covered in a blanket of stars and a crescent moon.

Character: Shinchiro Sano

When we first met

The sun shone brightly through your blinds as you still lay in your bed sleeping your ass off. Your door slams open, it’s your younger brother Keisuke. He runs over to you and belly flops on you. You’re quickly awoken from the sudden weight put on you.

“MOM! Keisuke belly-flopping me again!”

“Mom isn’t home, she went to work already (P/T) [Preferred title, Ex:Sib], so you have to take me to Sano's Dojo. Mom said so!”

You let out a groan of exhaustion as you hug your brother and roll him to the other side of the bed as you get out of it.

“Okay, let me get ready.”

You hear your little brother breath out a huff as you went to do your morning routine. You had grabbed a change of clothes before you had left and changed in the bathroom. You grab your phone and wallet and place them in your pockets.

“Keisuke, come on, let's go.”

You hear your brother's feet coming towards the door in his uniform as he puts on his shoes with you in front of the door. You grab the keys placed in a bowl as you left the apartment with him holding your hand because he’s just a ball of trouble.

“Keisuke, you want something from the convenience store before I drop you off?”

Your brother seemed to perk up at the gesture and nods his head, so you two made a pit stop at the local convenience store. Keisuke grabs a basket as he runs off to the snack section. You sigh and grab your own basket as you grab some items that you’ve noticed you’ve been running out inside the apartment. Soon Keisuke comes up to you and hands his basket towards you, inside the basket was filled to the brim with snacks, dorayaki, tayaki, rice crackers, and some daifuku.

“Really Keisuke? Eat all of this and you’ll get chubby.”

“Hey! These aren’t all for me, I'm sharing some with Mikey.”

You grab Keisuke’s basket as you went over to the cashier to pay, you hand the cashier money as you hand Keisuke’s bag of snacks to him. Keisuke happily takes the bag as he takes out a rice cracker and starts munching on it. Now you two silently walk towards the Dojo.

As you two arrive at the dojo someone suddenly bumps into your shoulder that had the groceries in your hand in it and the groceries fell out of your hand and onto the road where a car that was backing up crushed all the groceries inside the bag. The person who had bumped into you started to apologize profusely as he helped you stand up.

“I’m sorry, I had-”

“My groceries…”

“I’m sorry, what?”

“My groceries got ran over…”

You point towards the bag that was now crushed from the car that had already left. The man’s eyes slightly widened as he bowed in apology.

“I’m so sorry! I- uhh I can help you get your groceries again, I’ll pay of course.”

You nod as your mind still dwelled on the fact your money was just wasted away.

“Uhh, I’m gonna go inside now (P/T)”

The man suddenly turned his head towards Keisuke,

“Wait Keisuke? This is your sibling?”

The man then looked stunned again as he pointed at you, and Keisuke nodded.

“Shinchiro-kun I think you should comfort my (p/t) before you two leave.”

Shinchiro nods as he pats your back to try to comfort you, you want to get a better look at him so you slowly face your head at him to gather his appearance in your mind. His hair seemed to be gelled into a pompadour, there seemed to be a coat on his back, it was all black with some Japanese kanji symbols on the coat that were outlined in gold. He wore a white shirt underneath with baggy pants.

“Do you feel better?”

You nod solemnly

“Uhh, I’ll pay for all your groceries that got crushed if that can help you feel better?”

You quickly turn your head towards him hearing that you'd be able to get free groceries.

“Ya for real?”

“Yeah?”

You quickly take his hand and drag him to the closest grocery store, you grab everything you had bought earlier while also getting some personal snacks for later. Shinchiro could only chuckle a bit at your sudden eruption of energy. He follows you towards the cashier as he pays for you and you leave happily content.

When we fell in love

“No way! Like I’d ever go out on a date with a gang leader!”

The female quickly slapped his cheek and turned around angrily. Shinchiro felt heartbroken, he’s been rejected but I wasn’t brutal enough to be slapped.

20th rejection ....It didn’t make him feel any better that he's been declined 20 different times by 20 different genders.

A sad sigh was all that he could muster out as he sat on the old wooden bench in the calm park. The yelling of a few kids could be heard, and a few highschool students passed by him (probably in his school). Shinchiro knew that his friends would tease him relentlessly for this.

Shinchiro was so drowned in his own damn pile of depression he didn’t hear footsteps approaching him. You pull out a deliciously wrapped popsicle and place it against his cheek. Shinchiro was startled as he let out a yelp of surprise, a small chuckle was audible from your mouth.

“Calm down there, get rejected again?”

He only nods, you gently wave the popsicle in front of his face.

“You gonna take it or what?”

He takes the popsicle from you and starts eating away with it, biting off pieces with his mouth and letting the flavor sink into his tongue.

“Man, I don’t get why I keep being rejected. It's not like I have a bad personality, and personally I think I look decent”

“…You’re kidding, right Shinchiro?”

You could only stare at him in disbelief

“I’m sorry but the whole gangster vibe is not it, with the pompadour and shit I don’t think it’ll work out”

Shinchiro’s face only holds disbelief as you criticize him, his demeanor only lowers down. He gives out a sigh as he bites the popsicle.

“Maybe you’re right Y/n, maybe I might be unlovable…”

You can only give out a sigh as you start feeling guilty

“Shit, I’m not trying to bring you down. Look, think of it as this, maybe you keep being rejected because you haven’t found the right person yet. There is a right timing to finding the right person for you. You can’t just confess to every person you see and expect it to work out well. I’m sure you’ll find your other half one day”

You give him a small pat on the back as you nudge his side. Shinchiro’s mind takens in your tiny speech, maybe you are right. He just needs time to find the right person for him. He can feel himself smile a bit, you really know how to be meaningful when needed to.

“Cmon cheer up, I’ll help you fix that hair of yours if it makes you feel better”

Shinchiro can only chuckle as his heart beats faster a bit.

“I’ll take up on that offer, thanks Y/N”

You give him a small smile as you push his head down

“Man you’re such a dork”

Shinchiro chuckles, his cheeks heat up a bit. He looks at your smile, you pretty smile. When did he find it pretty, 1 minute ago. Though he knows he’ll be dedicated to liking you, but then loving you in the future. If you even would accept his flawed self.

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

Word Count:2753

[poppitron360]

tbh i find you annoying but thats just my opinion. you're allowed to do whatever the fuck you want. good for you. my own opinion - based on petty standards and prejudice and a bit of jealousy - is not a reflection of reality and should not affect you. keep having fun.

also please don't block me because you're posting about something i like and it's not very well known and i just needed to get this out because id explode

… Okay?

This ask is fascinating to me and I have SO MANY QUESTIONS. Imma disect your comment like a lil bug real quick, if that’s okay with you?

If it doesn’t affect me why did you tell me? Like what was the purpose of telling me that you find me annoying? What validation does that give you?

Like you took all that time and effort to 1) seek out my blog 2) read enough of my posts to come up with a REALLY REALLY GOOD BURN LIKE WOW THAT IS SO CLEVER 3) Click on the ask button 4) write this comment 5) CHANGE THE FREAKING FONT- Like you went through the whole process of highlighting that line of text, clicking the “minimise” AND the “strikethrough” buttons and THEN 6) pressing send and you didn’t stop to think ONCE “hey… why the hell am I doing this?”

It always baffles me when people tell me these things like they think I’m not already painfully aware of it. Like I know that I’m annoying to some people THAT’S WHY I’M HERE!!! I have found the one community of people that find what I’m saying interesting!

I’m not posting for YOU I’m posting for THEM. You think I give a shit what you think about me? Are you THAT self-centred? Maybe my posts aren’t tailored to you, and that’s fine! Not everyone is making content specifically for your consumption, and might just be marketing to a different audience. If you’re not pickin’ up what I’m puttin’ down, that’s okay. Maybe I’m just not putting it down for your specific needs.

You know, before I joined Tumblr, a comment like this would have sent me SPIRALLING. But now I’ve realised that there is actually a place and a people to whom I am entertaining. I just gotta find the right audience.

One of my favourite inspirational quotes ever is by Einstein and it’s that “everyone is a genius, but if you judge a fish by it’s ability to climb a tree, it would think itself an idiot” or words to that effect. Yeah- my talent for spinning Leo Valdez round my brain like a candy-floss machine until it eventually turns into content isn’t necessarily “fun at parties” or useful for getting a job or good for… y’know… anything applicable to the Real World™️ but here I’ve found where I CAN put it to good use! And a year ago I didn’t have that.

Before Tumblr, my lil fishy body was struggling ‘er way up that tree. Here, I’ve found my ocean!

Not sure where this metaphor is going in relation to the topic of you finding me annoying… I guess fish me doesn’t feel like such an “idiot” now that I’ve found where I belong? Like I know that my talents are niche but SOMEONE likes ‘em. Actually quite a lot of people like ‘em, judging by my follower count. And I didn’t get this far by just having a cute cat pic as my pfp, but by actually building my skill and working hard! And I’m proud of what I’ve accomplished. SO FUCK YOU!!! HUZZAH!!!

I’m aware of how much of an asshole I sound like, but honestly? I am proud of myself. And my girl deserves her moment.

I feel a little bad responding guns-ablaze bc your hate comment was legitimately kinda nice and considerate?

But Also- how weird is this as a hate comment? Like you’re being insulting but you’re also saying you like my stuff? Geez, it says a lot about you that you can’t even send anon hate correctly.

If you wanna keep reading my stuff, go ahead! You just either gotta power through whatever weird complex you have about me, or just don’t read it. I don’t really see what good sending me this ask will do. Whatever gripe you have, put it aside. Like how I put aside your lack of capital letters in that comment, knowing that my stupid obsessive thing with Grammar shouldn’t affect how I treat other people, and that that is my OWN problem to deal with.

I’m being silly here. I’ve just never had the confidence to roast my haters before. I’ve never had haters to roast (online, anyway) so forgive my overzealousness. If you couldn’t tell- I was a theatre kid and still am…

In all seriousness, I like how self-aware you are that you’re being prejudiced and jealous. And I’m kinda curious as to what specifically you’re jealous of? But that’s just to boost my own ego.

I’m aware that I can be a little intimidating sometimes, particularly in a written form of socialisation. I like grammar, okay? I like rules and guidelines and careful, creative choices to show emotion and how you can break the rules in certain ways to give depth and nuance to the character and find the pattern of letters and characters to communicate what you’re feeling over a written format and-

If you couldn’t tell by all the fanfics I write- I also have a passion for writing.

Also, what specific prejudices? I’m genuinely intrigued. Is it specifically based off of one of the protective characteristics (under the 2011 Equality Act)? Or is it more just the way I behave? Or is it something I said? Like don’t be shy I don’t want vague I want DETAILS!!

And I realise that me writing a whole freaking dissertation on your comment just PROVES your point that I’m annoying but I. Don’t. Care. I’m having fun. I can’t help that I have a lot of Thoughts And Feelings about things. It’s just how my brain works. Also, it is currently 1:23am where I live, so brain go brrr. If you made it this far, anon, I salute you! Thank you for taking the time to hear me out even though you think I’m annoying. That’s honestly a good quality to have. Here, have a sweet 🍬

And I know that that was… intense, to say the least. Oh BOY do I know that I can be intense. But genuinely- GENUINELY- I’d love to sit down and have a discussion with you on this because it truly fascinates me how other people perceive me. And, if you’re comfortable coming out of anon (if not, that’s fine) I’d like to learn more about why you think these things. Not necessarily so that I can change- but it’d be a great opportunity to see what I can learn about myself through what you think at me. I know it seems like I’m mad- I’m really not! I’m just captivated by the world and how others look at me.

Anyway, thanks for hearing me out, and I hope to have good conversations with legitimate constructive criticism in many posts to come! Never stop being passionate. Just maybe direct your passion to something more positive. Thank you so much for the ask, this was a really good thought experiment for me.

[weaselfactoryex]

Okay but the most important SAH question…

Who do you ship? I stand by waiting to judge.

Ohh boy a wacky question

Starting with the basic ones many seem to point at…

Aekku/Mulmangcho? Helll yess I’m all for this ship. Massive kudos to whoever’s cooking those Ao3 fanfics involving them. They’re peaking my interest big time and I can’t wait for more 👀

Geumsaegi/Juldarami is another big one I enjoy! I ship the both of them with others, but in terms of a healthy, long lasting relationship this one is it. It’s clear the pair care deeply about eachother, and you root for their safety constantly. If they weren’t constantly dealing with the enemy they’d cuddle up no doubt—

On a similar note, I am also for shipping all of Team Pangulggot. I’m not afraid of poly ships and MAN they are all close with each other. I see this as more platonic, but I don’t mind if someone sees them all as romantic! I just want all of them to be happy tbh.

Now to the more niche…

I ship Commander Jogjebi/Geumsaegi. Is it healthy and reciprocated? HELL NO—

This is honestly a joke ship for me. Throughout the series Com. Jogjebi drops everything for his ‘Special aid’, throws him well done parties…bro even buys him an expensive car. This ship would be EXTREMELY one sided, with Geum absolutely hating him as usual…

A more normal ship for me would be Com. Jogjebi/Huinjogjebi. Like CeilingKarasu pointed out, I’d be a long distance one, but they seem to care about each other regardless. Even after death, Huinjogjebi stays loyal to Jogjebi’s ideals for the weasel army.

One ship I’ve heard of and has caught my interest is the idea of Geomeunjogjebi/Oegwipali, but I’m not quite sure if I vibe with it yet. It seems like an interesting one for sure though…

I feel like Assistant Jogjebi is Aroace. I don’t ship him with anyone. No particular reason why; it’s just me gripping this enemy character and shaking him affectionately.

I’m sure i’ll have some more when I rewatch, but for now these are my standout ones—

[gojoest]

I HATE GOJOHIME SO MUCH OMFG

The annoying ass shippers on twitter have multiplied since the q&a and they’re continuously bitching and forcing gojohime down everyone’s throats 😭

There is no romance between them!! But they will NEVER understand this. They keep using the “gojo likes older women” thing when he doesn’t?? His preferences were never mentioned. Geges troll answer has caused so much fucking drama and debate

Also gojo doesn’t like her, he just teases everyone cuz he’s like that. She also hates him it’s literally canon. They keep saying enemies to lovers is their trope and its canon. It’s not??

SORRY FOR THE VENT 😓❤️

hiiii !! let me give you a hug first to calm you down 🫂

you know i don’t ship them either, in fact i see absolutely no potential between them in canon but we’re all here to have fun and things don’t always make sense with fanon ships or they do but it’s very subjective. like i am sure some ppl side eye me for shipping sukugo and yeah it makes absolutely zero sense tbh 💀 but EYE like it, it makes sense to me and i find it hot and i go crazy when i insert myself in that ship too

simply avoid things that trigger and agitate you like that, it’s literally not worth it dwelling on what gojohime shippers say to make their ship look more canon compared to other ships — it’s literally NOT and won’t be by the looks of it bc the honored one is long gone (man it hurts to say this 💀 i won’t do it again, i promise i just wanna make a point) and i don’t think gege will waste time on a flashback to show us possible but failed or unfulfilled romance between them bc : 1) that just makes no sense in the light of the manga’s progress and the themes it generally revolves around, and romance is not one of them let me tell you that. it’s close to 0, we’ve only seen bits and pieces with toji + mamaguro & miwa + mechamaru, ANYWAY

2) we’ve already seen the past arc and judging by their interactions there was no romantic attraction between them

i’ve already said what i think about gege’s troll answer about sugar baby gojo so i won’t repeat myself BUT the funniest thing is how ppl, children i suppose, consider utahime an older woman. gojo & utahime are 2 years apart. she is in her early 30s how is that old 💀 like if older women were gojo’s preference — which was never confirmed — she’d be instantly OUT, no chance

anyway, i think i got a bit irritated too im sorry kdkekj

one last thing tho, i don’t think utahime really hates gojo. i mean it’s obvious she cannot stand him which is why he keeps fueling her irritation but that doesn’t equal hatred. i think deep down she holds no grudge or ill feelings towards him and i don’t need it spelled out to me yk, i can read and draw my own conclusions — which is why i don’t think that “hate” in the relationship chart was in the sense of actual animosity. there are a lot of ppl that annoy the hell out of me but i don’t hate them, it’s just i don’t click and vibe with them and that’s the essence of their dynamic too, it’s one-sided irritation with gojo being very much chill about getting on her nerves

i’ll shut up now 🫡

[bengiyo]

Dead Friend Forever Ep 5 Stray Thoughts

Last time, Fluke pulled the gun on the rest of them, possibly shot Top, and told their help that they no longer needed it before disabling the radio. Por bled out after Top removed the tree branch from his stomach. They believe Top may have been the masked murderer based on him having the motorbike. Jin dislocated his arm and may be trapped somewhere with Phee.

Looks like we’ve begun the flashback section. This is a good choice, because I was very burnt out on the cabin section. Three hours with those boys is enough.

Well, at least we get to see Us act again.

Finally, Barcode appears. I missed baby boy.

I appreciate that we know this whole project won’t end well. I don’t have to hope these terrible boys won’t be terrible to Non.

Curious what changes to make them start calling him by his name if they’re so insistent on calling him “Greasy.”

Oof, looks like things are not going great at home for Non’s family. Seems they can’t afford to take care of themselves and an older kid.

Why did Non get upset at the mention of New? Seems like the dad and Non aren’t in a bad place.

Did he just wipe his hand on Top after touching Non? I do not feel bad for your impending death, Por.

Non is also smart.

“Make sure Barcode smiles when he’s applying the sunblock. Even if he’s character is dour as all hell, we gotta get our ad in.”

Have we figured out what medicines Non is taking?

Interesting. Tee is getting pushed around by his loan shark uncle because he needs money for his dad’s medicine.

Did the judges react to Por’s family name or something?

Are these boys really salty that the guy who wrote their goddamn pitch is here to see the result? This is worrisomely representative of how some projects get made. This is partly why so many movies suck now.

Oh ho! Por’s dad is a politician as well. His death is going to be very bad for them if any of them survive.

They’ve had the camera for less than four hours and Top already broke it.

Looking forward to these guys somehow blaming this fuck up on Non…

Well, that didn’t take long. Is Tee going to spin this around to later convince Non to unlock that bank account for him?

Who brings a $5,500 camera to school in the first damn place? If Non is the killer, these fuckers will have earned it.

Baby boy, hang in there!

I want you all to know that I despise every iQIYI app and interface. This episode has crashed on me repeatedly and now the sub timing has desynced by at least seven seconds.

There it is. Tee, I hate you.

Goddamn! I am over these boys. I gotta watch them torment this boy for multiple episodes before he vanishes or dies?

[theproverbialpen]

Musings from a Hazbin Fan and Hotel Employee

Yeah, that's right—I'm posting to this blog for the first time in years because I got into Hazbin Hotel of all things. Not only did I get into this cursed fandom, I'm writing fan fiction for it. Fan fiction. I think the last time I wrote fanfiction was...2012? 2013? And I only ever told 3 people about that one. Now here I am posting on main. The brainrot truly is unquantifiable.

If you're one of the few people that survived the purge of those I know IRL, congratulations. Please don't judge me lol. Anyways, actual musings are below the cut!

So I’m writing a fun little fanfic on AO3 and after someone left a comment (if you’re reading this, still genuinely one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me about my craft), it occured to me—as a Hazbin Hotel enjoyer, I have a pretty unique perspective on the series as an IRL hospitality professional. So! Thought it would be some cute bonus content to talk a little bit more about my life at an actual hotel and how it’s impacted my experience with Vivziepop’s hit series. 

Please note: this is written purely for shits and giggles. I don’t actually have any issues with the setting of Vivzie’s narrative or how it plays into the stories she and her team want to tell. I fucking love this show, to a potentially unhealthy degree, and I haven’t had this much fun with a series since like…okay well my hyperfixations change like every few months, but still. Point is, this isn’t actually critique, or satire, or anything with negative or critical intentions. TLDR; this post is for funsies, get off my dick.

So Who TF Am I, Anyways?

A little background on myself, for context. I’ve been employed at my hotel for almost a year now, and it’s my first hospitality job. I work in the Sales and Events department and I’ve come to learn that Group Business is actually integral for keeping a hotel up and running. When your average person (read: me before this job) thinks about hotels and traveling, you’d think it’s all about the families, bloggers, and individual travelers when it comes to guests and revenue. But in actuality, most of a hotel’s revenue—at least in the market I work in—will come from contracted room blocks and events. 

That’s where folks in my department come in. We work with clients to negotiate contracts and secure occupants for our hotel year round. Simply put, if we don’t do our jobs well, then no one else gets hours. So as much as the anti-capitalist in me will sometimes hate being a cog in the machine, it is really fulfilling to be able to help clients meet their needs while also making sure my coworkers are able to put food on the table. 

Speaking of being a cog in the machine, because of my role in Sales, this means that whenever I travel or think about hotels, I’m always thinking about the revenue side of things. I also work more with the Events team, so operations are also on the forefront of my mind. Which leads me to my principal quandary for this little blog post:

How in the Hell does the Hazbin Operate?

I have a laundry list of questions. A laundry list that’s almost as big as the actual pile of dirty laundry that is currently plaguing my bedroom floor. I will summarize (which is a generous word given how fucking verbose I can be) below:

Issue #1: Revenue Generation

Okay listen, I know Charlie is the Princess of Hell. I know she probably has unlimited capital, whatever that looks like in the HelluVerse. And I know the Hazbin is literally there to help rehabilitate people so charging them to stay would be counterproductive.

But my dude…do you understand how much money would be needed to run an operation of this scale?

At the end of Season 1, the new Hazbin is huge. Like it easily looks as big, if not bigger, than the hotel I work at which has nearly 500 rooms. Do you know how much revenue our team has to generate to keep this place running? Do you know how many millions our target goal is set at for each quarter? How many hundreds of thousands my coworkers’ individual quotas are set to? And sunshine in a bottle over here doesn’t charge her residents anything????? 

How does she get all those decorations? How does she order food or inventory? We know Hell has an economy, like Angel literally says he needs to save money for drugs in his first appearance. Is she…does she even pay her staff???

It is utterly appalling that Charlie is able to operate a hotel of this scale, both because of how it doesn’t make sense from a business perspective and because there are IRL billionaires that could probably do the same thing and solve homelessness overnight. 

Speaking of scale:

Issue #2: The Hazbin’s Systems, Or Lack Thereof

Okay so, yes, there’s only like…one official resident of the hotel, maybe two if Cherri moves in and doesn’t become a staff member (RIP Pentious, you would have loved living with Cherri Bomb). With the staff the way it is, that’s a solid 5:1 ratio, which is beyond ideal. But—and I touch on this in the fic—I feel I must reiterate: the new Hazbin is fucking massive. And you know what that means? It’s going to be able to hold a lot of guests. Guests that will need staff to take care of them. Let’s review:

Charlie is the owner and mostly teaches classes. Vaggie is the co-owner and kind of acts as the Executive Assistant to Charlie’s General Manager. I guess Alastor is the Hotel Manager? I’m gonna be honest, I have no idea what he does, but generally speaking he’s supposed to be the jack of all trades and manage the rest of the staff. Niffty handles Housekeeping and I guess would be the director of that. Husk is the bartender but like canonically only really eats pub food so he definitely can’t be the Food & Beverage head. 

Let’s say we scrap the Sales and Revenue Departments because clearly they don’t need income, but we keep a Marketing position so that Charlie can get the word out about the hotel. That leaves us with the need for Engineering, Front Desk, Rooms, and F&B staff. And like, not just one person—that would fucking suck—but proper staff. And given their track record of organization and managing the hotel…let’s just say, I would not be applying to the Hazbin Hotel anytime soon. Honestly, it sounds like that job would qualify to be the new tenth circle of Hell. 

What Does the Hazbin Get Right About IRL Hospitality?

So yes, clearly the world of the Hazbin Hotel leans towards the more fanciful—it is a story about Hell after all. However, there have been some moments that have made me chuckle as a hotel employee, things that are relatable for us in the hospitality world. Allow me to highlight them for you below:

Everyone is Bat Shit Crazy

Hospitality professionals are weird. So weird. Before I started my job, I was terrified of the level of professionality I would need to have. When I first got hired, I was given a whole packet on dress code and appropriate conduct. As you can probably tell from my writing style, this was concerning: I can be professional when I need to be, but I cannot maintain that guise for extended periods of time. Call it my toxic trait.

I also already had this impression of poised and put-together hotel staff from my previous experiences with travel. All the Front Desk agents would be in these clean and wrinkle-free clothes with kind yet business-forward attitudes, office workers would be walking around in full suits, and occasionally you’d see the hotel management on the floor if you were looking. Let me tell you now—it is a facade. An act. An incredible stage production unfolding in real time where all the staff do their absolute damndest to make you feel like you are in an organized and professional institution. Not unlike a certain hit animated musical.

My direct supervisor, the literal Director of Catering and Events, once told me that being a liiiiiittle crazy was a prerequisite for working in our department during the hiring process for a new Sales Manager. She was wrong—the prerequisite is not “a little” crazy. The prerequisite is being bat shit insane. And it’s not just our department, oh noooOoooOo, it is every department. Downstairs in our little basement dungeon, we make out of pocket comments, scream at random intervals, and swear way more than we should (that one might be my fault…according to my partner I swear more at work than at home and apparently it’s rubbing off on my colleagues), but that behavior is in no way restricted to just the Sales Team. 

I process the checks that are sent to our property and our Director of Rooms makes me say “can I get a WITNESSSS” before she signs off on the drop log (Charlie-core). If I don’t say it high pitched enough or with enough vigor, she makes me do it again. I once watched a guy in Engineering climb a tall step ladder balanced with two legs on a platform and a third leg balanced on a wooden plank his coworker was holding steady. The fourth leg was over the open air. Let me reiterate: the open. Fucking. Air. Tell me you can’t see Angel Dust and Cherri doing that shit.

Speaking of Engineering, you wanna know what dumbass thing happened just this morning? The Regional Director of the department—regional meaning he manages teams all across our area, like top level type shit—told us about this cursed ass Instagram trend he found where allegedly, putting ketchup on a Kit Kat tasted like fudge. So right there and then, him, myself, and two other coworkers decided ‘why the fuck not?’:

I would never seek it out willingly again, but I honestly didn’t hate it. 

The point of all of this is to say—the antics the Hazbin crew get up to? Totally realistic. I could see my coworker Robert throwing me into an active battlefield against my will. We have deadass done the role playing thing Angel and Pentious did during our trainings, and it was just as unhinged. Every day some shit happens at this hotel and I’m just like, “Yup. That could happen in Hazbin.”

“Call Now! Or Don’t! I Don’t Care! We Still Don’t Have a Working Phone!”

I would like to preface this section by saying: if you happen to be a Front Desk associate, I’m sorry. This is not directed at you, this is directed at your managers and their communication skills that may or may not exist. If you are somehow a manager reading this, uh—first of all, cringe. Second of all, I hope these next few paragraphs don’t apply to you. If they do and you’re offended: that’s a certified you-problem, babes. 

There are three certainties in this life: death, taxes, and miscommunication from your fucking managers. Tell me why in this past week alone I have been in 5 different email threads regarding fuck-ups and complaints from guests about things that we had clearly communicated. Tell me why in these email threads, people were attempting to throw me under the bus or shift the blame to my team. Tell me why I have gone to every single individual office in my department complaining about this. Tell me why this isn’t the first time this has happened.

Another hotel tidbit: across the board, Q1 (Jan-Mar) is supposed to be slow, for all of hospitality. It’s the time to get the metaphorical phone lines working, ya know? Our Q1 was stupidly busy, so I get it, people were slammed and short staffed. But like… we had time. Time to iron out our communication, time to create systems and processes that would ensure we’d be all set when things got busier. Yet here I am at the start of Q2 with an entire fist shoved up my ass being puppeted around to fix other people’s mistakes. 

It’s times like these when I go back to rewatch Hazbin for the like 26th time and I watch Charlie and Alastor run the hotel and I’m just like “whyyYyYyYyYyYy”. Like I KNOW Vaggie has had days where she’s like, “what…what am I supposed to be doing right now? Like what is my job, what… What?” 

It’s not just Front Desk either. It’s every department, even my own bosses. Like the call is coming from inside the house, sweetie, why did you tell this Sales Manager that I was taking care of all her commissions but you didn’t tell me this. Why am I blocking a room for an Orientation the following Monday at fucking 5:45 PM on a Friday. Why am I JUST finding out about a VIP guest when I have been asking you if you had any notes for me for the whole week.

I touch on it in my fic as well but like…pretty sure Charlie just, decides to host her classes day of. And that drives me insane. Like I…there are processes. Things that need to be done so that everyone is on the same page. You don’t just wing this shit, that’s how you end up with Susan calling your Director to tell her that you’re a useless waste of space not even deserving of the air in your lungs because you didn’t give her her fucking breakfast voucher. 

As a character, I love Alastor. If I were ever in the same room as him, I’d probably hate him. But if there’s anything relatable about that Geneva Convention Violation on Legs it’s his absolutely done attitude in Episode 1’s opening commercial.

Charlie Loves Helping People, and So Do We!

Alright, I’ve complained for enough paragraphs, let’s be positive for a second. The thing that is by far the most true to life in Hazbin Hotel is how much joy Charlie gets from taking care of her guests. Like…that’s our bread and butter in the hospitality world. Well, maybe just the butter; we need that bread in the form of cold hard cash (or direct deposits, whatever works best). But as much as I will bitch and moan about the difficulties of working in a hotel, there’s nothing quite as fulfilling as a guest telling you that you made their entire trip better. The butterflies I get reading reviews where my coworkers are mentioned by name and a guest writes about how we completely turned around their bad day are an absolute delight. It just means the world knowing that you can have that kind of impact on someone, even if it’s just in the little things.

In Episode 2, when Charlie and the crew are welcoming Sir Pentious and she just starts vibrating with excitement is exactly how I feel when I get to meet a client that we’ve been working with for months and finally welcome them to our property. When they sing “It Starts With Sorry” and just get to have a moment of empathy and compassion together, it reminds me of the clients and the phone calls I take where I get to ask them about their goals and help them feel like they’re supported and heard. In the grand scheme of things, is a nice phone call or interaction with some hotel employee going to change your life? Probably not. But for those few moments when their burdens seem lighter is why I love my job.

This goes for guests, and for my fellow coworkers. I’ve been very blessed to start my hospitality career in an unusually supportive work culture. Yeah, we can be some right petty bitches sometimes, but overall everyone is so encouraging and so quick to help lighten each other’s loads. Like in Episode 5 (best episode btw, for obvious reasons) when all the Hazbin Crew are working together to prepare the hotel for Lucifer’s arrival, that shit made me so giddy cause like- that’s us! Look at us go! We workin together so hard, we’re so cute! Like when Niffty and Pentious are baking and she looks up at him all excited n’ shit—that’s literally been me working with our Director of Restaurants on new food menus or promotional material. 

There’s something about being in an occupation where your whole purpose is to take care of people that really brings out the selflessness in you, and I think that’s what makes the hotel such a great setting for Charlie’s mission of redemption. I didn’t realize that until writing this paragraph tbh, but yeah, it just kinda…works. When your job is to make sure other people have a good time and feel supported and you’re surrounded by people that make you feel the same way, it’s a lot easier to want to choose to do good, to do right by the people around you. So as much as I have some silly little nitpicks…yeah, I can admit—I love that this show is about the Hazbin Hotel specifically.

Anyways, if you made it this far, thanks for reading! Next update for Life is In Redemption will be out in the days to come, just thought this would be a fun addition while I work on some of the content with my friends. This upcoming chapter is going to have a co-author, so get hyyyyyped :)