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servndipityz · 4 days ago

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Namgyu but him being the normal middle schooler way hurts you? Or something like that idk you’re the only one I’ve seen write him so accurately

nam-gyu getting the silent treatment from the reader? his little brain would actually start to short circuit he’d get so grumpy lmao

a/n ── hey! i decided to mix these two anons since i thought they'd make a really good fic together, hope u don't mind :) thank you so much for your requests and your patience, ik this one took a while. i hope u both like it!

SNAP

warnings ── blood, death, general squid game themes

word count ── 2.4k

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silence.

silence was all that filled the air as you descended the stairs, walking in line back to the dorm room. you were surrounded by more than a hundred players, but nobody spoke. nobody dared.

the last game had been a bloodbath, to say the least. you didn’t think you’d ever be able to forget the lifeless eyes of innocent players lying on the ground—especially knowing it could have just as easily been you.

and it had been damn close.

you turned your head slightly, just enough to catch a glimpse of him a few steps behind you. nam-gyu.

you’d thought you could tolerate him. the way he talked over you, the way he always had to have the last word, the way he threw whatever was at hand just to get on your nerves. annoying as fuck, but bearable.

this time, he'd pushed too far.

from the moment mingle had begun, your heart had already been racing. hell, you could still feel it hammering in your chest at an abnormally high rate. but that wasn’t enough for him, was it? no, nam-gyu, who had taken whatever shit drug thanos had given him, had stood by your side.

that was normal, you'd come to realize. you didn't understand why, but somehow, after swearing he hated you, he'd always end up next to you.

so, while the damn carousel was spinning, he'd leaned in, voice just low enough for only you to hear. maybe he'd taken pity on you. maybe he'd seen how scared you looked. you cursed yourself for ever even thinking that.

"you sure you got this? you look kinda nervous…" he said, a small smile forming on his lips as you turned to him. "what if you freeze up? or what if nobody picks you? that’d be bad."

"shut up," you muttered, looking away, narrowing your eyes—ignoring the cold, sweaty goosebump crawling over your skin. it had sounded more like a plea than a demand.

"and what if you end up alone?" he went on, completely ignoring you, inching closer—if that was even possible. "you’d just be standing there while everyone rushes away—tick, tock, tick, tock…"

that was when the nausea hit. real nausea. he was just messing with you… like he always did. but what if?

when the first number was called and the game started, you managed to get through a couple of rounds, your eyes filling with tears from pure nerves.

then, one of the last rounds. the voice called out 3. you looked at nam-gyu and thanos in front of you, thinking—just thinking—that you were saved.

you rushed to them, just as nam-gyu took a step back.

"actually, i think i see a better option over there," he said, pointing at a random player.

your soul hit the floor. he was actually going to leave you behind. you were going to die.

panic took over, tears slipping down your face as you frantically looked around for someone, anyone, to save you.

"tick, tock, tick, tock..." nam-gyu’s voice echoed in your head.

then—someone yanked you by the arm, shoving you into the nearest room.

you gasped for breath, your chest heaving. you were alive. you hadn't died.

nam-gyu snickered in front of you. thanos, also in the room, stood by the little window, uninterested in whatever had just happened between you two.

"what—" was all you managed, quiet sobs escaping your lips as you struggled to process it. you were alive. somehow, you were alive.

"you actually thought i was gonna leave you?" nam-gyu giggled. giggled. he had his hand over his mouth like it was the funniest thing in the world. "that’s crazy."

you shook your head as a tear threatened to spill, breathing in through your nose to steady yourself. the memory of what had happened less than an hour ago burned in your mind.

ha wasn't just mean and annoying. nam-gyu was cruel. nam-gyu was evil.

you'd judged him wrong. he wasn’t just a boy hiding his fear behind teasing. he wasn’t someone you could ever grow to love under different circumstances. he wasn’t misunderstood. all those thoughts you’d had before? wrong. they had to be. he was heartless. and you hated him.

as you stepped into the main room, your heart eased—just a little—when you spotted se-mi. without thinking, you quickened your pace toward her.

she did the same, meeting you halfway and grabbing you by the arms. “thank god you’re okay,” she said, eyes scanning your disheveled state.

you inhaled sharply, nodding, even as the words caught in your throat. she tilted her head, concern deepening in her expression.

“is everything—?” she started, but before she could finish, another voice cut in.

“wassup, team?” thanos said, strolling over and throwing up gang signs he probably didn’t even know the meaning of.

but of course, he wasn’t alone.

you felt it immediately—nam-gyu’s presence behind you. close. so close that if you moved even an inch, you’d collide into him. but still, never touching.

“we almost thought we were gonna die back there, huh?” nam-gyu said, still amused, his gaze lingering on you.

you turned to him. fuming.

so many thoughts ran through your head. so many things to say. so many bones to break. you opened your mouth—

and then shut it. no. you didn’t want to see him again. didn’t want to acknowledge his existence. but since you were stuck in these fucking games together, you couldn’t exactly avoid him.

so you’d do the next best thing.

act like he didn’t exist. because to you, he didn't.

you could see it in his face, his grin starting to form, waiting for you to say something, to take the bait like you always did. but not this time. you just shot him a grimace, turning and walking awat toward the bathroom.

and so, time went on.

but not for him.

nam-gyu wasn’t used to silence. not from you. not like this.

at first, he barely noticed. he was still riding the high of his own amusement, watching you seethe in barely restrained anger. but the longer the minutes stretched, the longer you refused to bite back, the more something began to gnaw at him.

it started with the little things. the way you didn’t even look his way when he made some stupid remark at dinner, or how you barely reacted when thanos made a joke about his survival skills. before, you would’ve rolled your eyes, shot some sarcastic comment back, but now—nothing. not even a twitch of annoyance.

the way you turned your back to him, like he wasn’t even in the room, like he wasn’t even worth acknowledging—it set something off in him. something uncomfortable. something he didn’t want to name.

he tried again later, when almost a day had passed. sitting on the stairs of the beds, staring at nothing, your hands gripping your knees like if you let go, you’d shatter. he sat down beside you, close enough to invade your space, to test you.

"so, what, you mad at me or something?" he asked, voice deliberately light, teasing, waiting for you to react.

nothing.

his fingers drummed against the metal. "c’mon. you can’t seriously be mad. it was a joke. i knew someone would pick you up." he turned his head toward you, watching for a flinch, a flicker—anything. "you really think i’d let you die?"

still, nothing.

you just stood up, walking away like he hadn’t even spoken. like he was air.

his jaw clenched. fine. two could play this game.

except—you didn’t break. not that night. not the next day. not the next game. not even when he upped his antics, when he threw crumpled-up paper at the back of your head or made offhanded comments just loud enough for you to hear.

it was driving him insane.

he never realized how much he thrived off your back-and-forth until it was gone. until you treated him like a ghost.

until he realized—he didn’t like being invisible to you.

the next night, the dorm was eerily quiet, the kind of silence that only came when exhaustion weighed too heavy on everyone’s bones. nam-gyu lay on his bed, eyes open, staring at the ceiling, restless.

fuck it.

before he could second-guess himself, he was already moving, slipping off his mattress with the kind of ease that came from knowing how to sneak around. his feet barely made a sound against the cold floor as he crept across the room, stopping just short of your bed. he hesitated for a second—just a second—before sitting down at your feet.

you shot up immediately, eyes wide, breath hitching. "what the—" the words died in your throat as you jerked back against the pillow, your hands bracing against the sheets. for a split second, you were ready to shove him off, to kick him away—

but then his hand was over your mouth, and his face was inches from yours.

"shh." his eyes flickered to the other beds, scanning for movement. none. he exhaled, slow and careful, before pulling his hand back. "relax, okay? i just—"

he trailed off, unsure how to finish that sentence. he just what? wanted to bother you? wanted to win? no, that wasn’t it. the truth was a little more pathetic than that. he just missed hearing your voice, even if it was yelling at him.

he shifted, sitting cross-legged now, knee brushing against yours. you had pulled yourself up too, back pressed against the headboard, muscles tense. you were still watching him like he might pull something, but there was something else there too. wariness, sure. but curiosity too.

"you just what?" you repeated, voice still laced with annoyance, but softer now. almost… wary.

he swallowed, suddenly very aware of how close you two were, your eyes on him in a way that made his heart pound annoyingly fast. "i dunno," he muttered. "wanted to see if you were still alive."

"seriously?" you scoffed. "get out."

but you didn’t push him away. and he didn’t move.

"nam-gyu, i swear to god—"

"you really hate me that much, huh?" he interrupted, his voice quieter now. the teasing was still there, but barely. something more vulnerable lurked beneath it, something he wasn’t sure he wanted to confront. "like, actually?"

silence. you looked at him then, and for the first time in days, he saw something other than anger in your eyes. something conflicted. something dangerous.

"you tell me," you whispered, your breath fanning against his cheek. your fingers twitched, like you were resisting the urge to shove him away—or pull him closer.

his throat went dry. he wanted to say something. something cocky, something that would shift the power back into his hands. but all he could think about was how your lips were barely inches from his, how your warmth seeped into him like a slow burn, and how he wasn’t nearly as immune to you as he thought.

you were waiting for an answer, your gaze piercing into his, but he had none. not one that wouldn’t make him look stupid, anyway. he wanted to scoff, to roll his eyes and tell you to lighten up, but he couldn’t—not when his own heartbeat was betraying him.

you pulled back first, sitting up straighter, arms crossing over your chest. "forget it," you muttered, shaking your head. "i don’t even care."

hut he couldn’t be invisible to you. he wouldn’t.

because you did care. he knew you did. he could see it in the way your hands clenched, the way your knee bounced slightly, the way you were holding back from looking at him. you cared enough to be mad, enough to hate him, enough to freeze him out.

"yeah?" he said, leaning in slightly—but this time, there was no smirk, no game. "then why do you look like you’re about to cry?"

that was it. that was the final fucking straw.

something in you cracked wide open, all the frustration and hurt bubbling to the surface before you could shove it down again.

“you always do this,” you hissed, your voice low. “you push and push and push, and when i finally break, it’s just a joke. when i get mad, I’m overreacting. when i tell you to stop, you just push harder.”

his stomach twisted. you weren’t just lashing out. you were breaking apart.

“you’ve been messing with me since the second we met,” you went on, voice rising, not caring if anyone heard. “every fucking day, it’s something new. tripping me, throwing things at me, talking over me, getting in my face. it’s exhausting. and i let it go because i thought—” you cut yourself off, jaw clenching, forcing yourself to breathe. “i thought maybe you didn’t mean it.”

nam-gyu stayed quiet. just staring. no teasing grin, no cocky remark. just… watching.

“but you do mean it,” you whispered. "because you think it’s funny. because you like seeing me mad. because it doesn’t matter if i’m actually hurt, as long as you get a reaction." you shook your head, voice unsteady. "and i’m done."

nam-gyu’s chest tightened. his hands clenched in his lap. he wanted to argue. he wanted to tell you that you were wrong. but he couldn’t—not when you were looking at him like that. not when he knew, deep down, that you weren’t wrong at all.

"I’m sorry."

the words came out so quiet, so unnatural in his own voice, that for a second, he wasn’t sure he’d actually spoken them.

you froze.

his lips pressed together like he immediately regretted saying it, but there was no taking it back now. his hand twitched in his lap, like he wanted to reach for something but didn’t know what.

"you—what?"

nam-gyu exhaled sharply, running a hand through his hair, looking anywhere but you. "don’t make me say it again," he muttered.

a beat of silence.

then—a laugh. small, quiet, barely there. but real.

it startled both of you.

nam-gyu’s head snapped up, watching as you bit your lip, shaking your head like you couldn’t believe it. "you suck at apologizing," you said, still exhausted, tired.

his lips twitched. "yeah, well. not much practice."

"clearly."

another pause. this time, the silence was lighter. not quite peace, but not war either.

nam-gyu let out a dramatic sigh, sitting back onto the mattress. "so," he drawled, hands fidgeting with a loose strang of your bedsheet. "am i still dead to you, or…?""

you rolled your eyes, relaxing but keeping your distance. "we’ll see."

"uh-huh. that’s progress."

"shut up."

"make me."

he knew he wasn't just sorry, no, he knew it was much deeper than that. but that was all he would allow himself to say. for now.

and just like that, maybe he wasn't that evil.

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#nam gyu #namgyu x reader #nam gyu squid game

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moonyor · 3 months ago

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SPOILERS FOR CHAPTER 107 SXF MANGA ₊⊹

RIGHT i know i’m delusional but hear me out 😭😭

so, chapter 107 ends off with us finding out that lunaluna selena is actually melinda,

which i kinda thought it would be her so woohoo

ALSO on an unrelated note, a lot of people are saying stuff which makes melinda look really sus and although it doesn’t make much sense, i feel like she probably had to do some last minute work or something— she did organise the whole event (with her group), but something probably didn’t work out so maybe she had to fill in for someone??? i’m not sure, she did mention her being sleep deprived too, so maybe it was her being tired from organising the event and having to fill in? idk though 💯

okay back to what i was saying!!! so, skipping a few things, what if melinda does end up reading both yor and anyas palms? i imagine her saying something along the lines of “oh i’ll read your palms since that’s what you came here for!” and then explaining how her readings arent very accurate, but saying that she’d try to make it as accurate as possible since, well, it’s yor and anya

anya would DEFINITELY say “ME FIRST ME FIRST” and both melinda and yor would just go along with it 😭 (we love anya guys)

OKAY now hear me out, what if, for anya, melinda describes damian as her partner or whatever??? and loid as yors??? i’ll explain further 🗣️🗣️

both our girls go to see how compatible they are with their “soulmate” right?? and possibly to see who their significant other is too, so melinda tries to be accurate and gives descriptions of damian for anya and loid for yor ⁉️⁉️

i imagine the description for damian to be hilarious, saying how he can be pretty honest wellllll….. foul-mouthed? you get my drift. anya would be like “yikes why the hell is my man like that i don’t want that pls 😭💔” and then melinda saying how he’s truly soft deep down and how he’s really just a sweetheart #tsunderedamian

ALSO: anya could possibly read melinda’s mind and find out she’s referring to damian, but i don’t see this happening as in my eyes, melinda herself would not be aware of who the person she’s describing is, but she would know how they may look and certain personality traits of theirs!!!! i’m not sure though 😅

as for loid and yor, yor would be COMPLETELY oblivious while melinda is stating the obvious, kinda like the panel of yuri describing loid, it was in chapter 12 i believe?? anyway, yuri says something like “sure, maybe he’s tall, good looking, blonde” etc etc, i see melinda basically stating how he looks and how he overworks himself 😭😭😭 loid is an absolute workaholic but yor is too dumb (i’m sorry yor not in a bad way i love you) to realize that melinda is actually basically just stating everything about loid 😿😿

yor, loid and anya then meet up again after they leave the place and loid asks what happened blah blah blah, yor THEN literally says everything melinda told her and how that’s her partner and how they’re perfect for each other

they’re so cute together i’m actually crazy about them

ANYWAYS loid either is just as clueless as yor, and somewhat jealous that there’s someone else out there that’s PERFECT for yor (although he doesn’t recognise his jealousy and quickly dismisses it) OR he’s like “hey.. that kinda sounds like me??”

obviously he doesn’t say this out loud and he just thinks this in his head, but he does go on to explain how he’s happy there’s someone out there like that for yor (and he thinks that someone is him)!!!! i feel like his ego would get slightly boosted by the fact that yors other half is him, and obviously, he doesn’t say this directly and recognise it properly but he still does act somewhat giddy 😭😭😭🩷🩷🩷

THATS IT FROM ME!!! this is my first post so i don’t think it’ll reach many people— i’m not really sure on how tumblr works lmao but i just needed to get my delusional thoughts out!!!!!

this would be cute but i’m expecting something a lot bigger than this and i don’t think there’s gonna be much romance at all, in fact i feel as if there’s gonna be a lot of action in the next few chapters and oh boy am i excited!!!!! 🔥🔥🔥

if this did happen it probably wouldn’t be like how i’ve explained it, and it’d probably be like the calm before the storm 💔😭

oh well i guess we’ll find out in a month

#loid forger #sxf anya #sxf spoilers #spy x family manga spoilers #loid x yor #loidyor #agent twilight #yor briar #i’m tweaking helo #guys but guys please what if #wait rhis is my first post HELP #damian desmond #damianya #anya forger #spy x family anya #chapter 107 #spy x family #spy x family manga #i’m so delusional please send help

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kurishiri · 5 months ago

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william v.s. darius . . . william rex epilogue 🌹

— this translation may not be 100% accurate or contain creative liberties due to characterization or narrative flow purposes. if you enjoy, please consider reblogging, but don’t repost these or claim these as your own!

— cw: very suggestive scenes that are awkwardly translated. also i translated this at 1am; you've been warned lmao

Kate: So we’re going shopping!

William: That we are. It’s become less crowded now, which would make it the ideal time for window shopping, right?

W: Let’s choose something together. One that would suit you.

Unlike the lively buzz of the street fair, where many people had gathered,

here, we didn’t have to worry about our surroundings, so we could walk at our own pace.

(Will knew that, so he invited me here.)

(…And the fact I could spend time together with him like that was a delightful reward as well.)

William: That outfit looks charming. It seems like it would fit your air.

Kate: Wah, this looks wonderful! It goes well with the skirt next to it too.

I was happy at how we walked side by side as well, in a good mood, and——

Kate: …Could we hold hands?

William: What a coincidence. I was just thinking the same.

When his beautiful fingers touched mine, our fingers intertwined together.

Kate: Hehe, thank you.

I squeezed his hand back, when…

Kate: Ah.

As if being led away, my eyes stopped on something,

with that something being a crimson red ribbon that went with a dress that left quite an impression.

When William followed my gaze, he narrowed those red eyes.

William: Indeed, I can easily imagine you in that.

W: Then, this dress is for you.

—— Time skip; William’s room ——

Kate: …How does it look?

I tried on the dress that I had gotten as a present as soon as we returned.

In response, Will, who was sitting on the sofa, narrowed his eyes, making their way from the top of my head to my toes.

William: Would you mind spinning around for me?

Kate: Like this?

When I did as I was told, the crimson ribbon fluttered.

William: It does suit you.

Kate: Thank you. Then I’ll be wearing this on our next date.

I looked down at myself, biting down on the feeling that sprung from within me,

when I realized the way he was looking at me.

His gaze on me seemed to hold a bewitching smile,

and I felt a familiar twinge that had been locked within me resurface.

Kate: …Will.

I found myself drawn to him, until I stood right across.

Kate: I want you to kiss me.

William: ——Then come here, my robin.

With that invitation, I sat atop his legs, and when our faces drew together, close enough where I could feel his breath…

His hands caressed my cheeks.

Those eyes, the color of blood, held a hint of amusement.

Kate: …Don’t keep me in suspense like that.

William: Hehe, my apologies.

W: I simply wanted to see more of you being honest with your desires.

Becoming more excited with how his fingers teased my lips, I took his finger into my mouth. [1]

William: ……… [surprised]

W: Pfft, haha. It makes me happy that you’d like to have a taste of my fingers as well.

W: But then you won’t be able to kiss me like that, right?

Kate: Ah…

Withdrawing his thumb, half-open lips met with one impatient for a kiss.

Kate: Mn…

His tongue slipped in, giving me a numbing sensation as they playfully intertwined together——

And when he let go, he gave a small smile.

William: …You are free to decide what it is your heart seeks and what you would like to do.

Kate: …I know.

William: And perhaps your heart may change. Our feelings can’t be restricted, nor should they ever be.

W: Of course, not by others, and not even by ourselves.

Kate: …So that is to say,

K: I am free to do as my heart wants. And even in this very moment [2], I love you, Will.

William: Yes, I figured as much.

Kate: Huh?

William: Your heart is close to mine, and we are not separated in the slightest.

W: That is how my heart feels——at any moment in time.

Kate: Will…

My lover before my eyes seemed to always, no matter in which moment in time, take pleasure in unraveling what was in my heart.

Feeling this, I…

Kate: If we stack even these smallest moments… they can become an eternity.

William: …Indeed.

Our lips met once more, being fondled affectionately in my mouth.

William: And I would like to have a taste of you, to my heart’s content.

W: If it is as you say, and these small moments can become an eternity… I would like to embody it.

Kate: …Will…

When I kissed him, he sought me deeper.

William: Should we take it to the bed? Or…

Kate: …Haa… I want more… like this…

William: …I imagine it would be quite frustrating to move, after all.

With the ribbon of the dress undone, my chest relaxed [3].

As if the wrapping of the present was removed, my skin was now exposed,

and my nipples gave way to my desire.

William: …Kate.

With his lips calling my name, his tone filled with emotion, pleasure rushed through me.

William: Could I engrave my feelings in you?

He sucked on my breasts, leaving a mark as red as his eyes.

The throbbing in my core excited me and trickled within me,

and I welcomed his palm as it slid in——

While indulging in the sweet excitement he gave me, I tasted the pleasure of this small moment in time.

Fin.

will vs darius jude vs nica alfons vs ring

← prev fin

NOTES:

[1] I wasn’t sure how to phrase this; part of it may be like midnight or 1am translating, but I also wasn’t completely sure how to translate this part of the line [その指先をはむりと含んだ] (sono yubisaki wo hamuri to fukunda) as well. So I’m mostly kind of guessing based on the context of the lines that come after.

[2] Kate uses the word [刹那] (setsuna) here, which means a moment or instant, though this particular word, unlike another similar meaning word, [瞬間] (shunkan), [刹那] is derived from the Sanskrit word kshana, which in Buddhism refers to the “shortest possible interval of time.”

[3] They say here [胸元が緩む] (munamoto ga yurumu), where [胸元] refers to like the chest or breast area (but can also mean the solar plexus), while [緩む] means like to loosen, slacken, relax, that kind of thing, both for tangible things like parts of the body and intangible things like rules. I’m not really sure exactly how to translate this, but it’s probably referring to how a woman’s breasts are bare, without the support of anything like a bra.

END NOTES: the difference between will and darius' end was interesting, like how they both treated the boy. they're probably trying to hit home the differences between them... which darius seemed to pick up on. i wouldn't say i'm very good at translating william, per se, but i did enjoy his story as well, and just the way he spent time with kate and darius! i feel they highlighted a lot of characteristics of his here that i feel many would like, appreciate, or be drawn to.

full masterlist 🌹🪽

#again apologies for any awkwardly tled lines!#but still i hope you enjoyy #i meant to get this done yester #but .. stuff happened ;v;#ikemen villains #ikevil #イケメンヴィラン #ikevil william #ikevil william rex #william rex #ikemen villains william #cybird ikemen series #cybird ikemen #cybird otome #ikemen series #otome game #otome #ikevil translation #ikevil translations

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lizandbo · 2 years ago

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okie doks, so i would like a hc where bokuto, kuroo, and maybe tsukishima react to seeing their volleyball player! girlfriend play for the first time

i love your blog btw :) it makes me happy <3

Volleyball player!reader x kuroo, bokuto and tsukishima

I’m so so glad that my writing makes you happy, plus this ask is like 100 years cuz time management is not a thing for me

Masterlist

Tsukishima

Before I say anything else HE WILL LAUGH WHEN YOU MESS UP

When you tell him that you play volleyball he might not believe you until he sees it with his very own eyes

He would believe you but ✨trust issues✨

If you ever invite him to one of your matches he just either gives a glare and says a monotone “ok” or grunt in response

But most times he goes to your games without you knowing

Tsukishima wants to see when do your best without the pressure of people yk watching you

Cuz honestly I feel that wholeheartedly

But man when he does see you?

Bros gonna explode from being flustered

He thinks that you honestly look really hot, but he never ever gonna say that

Not even when he’s being held by gunpoint, which honestly who would ask that question if you were being held by gunpoint?

Anygays

He just appreciates your work ethic in volleyball

Not being too annoying and obnoxious about volleyball or not giving a fuck with his standards

Nice balance

and at some point you motivate him to push on his own hobbies (more so volleyball)

When you catch sight of him you whip your head around to get a double take almost getting whiplash in the process

He just covers his mouth and snickers by the confusion of your face just now realizing that he did attend your match after all

You shuffled up to him half bashful half excited to see tsuki

You wrapped your arms around his middle and he stared back to, giving you a little headpat

“Sooo how did I do? Since you’ve been stalking me like a dimwit”

“You did better than last time ig, moron”

“You were here last time too??”

“Now see your the dimwit here since you didn’t even realize I’m coming to your stupid games”

“Awww tsuki I thought would’ve never be here:(“

“Your an official dimwit” tsukishima says with a blush darkening

Bokuto

He knew you played volleyball cuz he always has asked you how was your day? Every single fucking day

Even before you were dating

It might get a lil annoying sometimes but baby boy genuinely wants to hear about your day

Prolly at some point interrupts you by accident but once he realized he apologizes so damn much

But a simple “it’s ok bo” is enough for him lmao

ANYWAYS

IS SO PROUD OF YOU WHEN YOU PLAY

ALWAYS YELLS LETS GO Y/N OR HEY HEY HEYYYY THATS MY S/O

Vvvv proud baby

Whatever position you play he’s so so so supportive

“Y/n! That’s such a great set im so proud of you”

“I KNEW YOU COULD DO SO WELL BABY”

“HEY HEY HEY! That spike was so accurate, you should have a kiss as an award! Come her baby”

“BLOCK THEM BASTARDS! YEAHHH”

When the match/ practice is over he’ll quite literally jump and attack you with a bear hug smothering you to absolute death

You guys go to your car him carrying you bride style and finding a withered mess of half dead rose petals in the passenger seat cuz bo was so focused on seeing you than bringing the damn bouquet of flowers he was gonna give you

“Well… maybe I’m just distracted by incredibly sexy and hot partn-“

“OKAY BOKUTO, LETS JUST GET IN THE DAMN CAR”

“Your also very cute when you stammer like that”

“Booooo”

Kuroo

Also a vvv proud baby

Found out by having the volleyball match delayed and you coming home late

Quite literally did the mom “and where were you?” Thing on you

But he was concerned for his baby cuz you could’ve gotten kidnapped

You told him that you were at a game of yours and he was appalled

“And you never thought that I would like to go?” Pouts like a little girl in a playful way

“Well I just never thought you wanted to go since your always so busy”

“Bullshit, I’d do anything for you” he practically manhandled you onto the bed and cuddled there

“Oh really? Anything??” Your eyes sparkled as he met your eyes with a small smile

“Yes baby, anything. Your my one and only”

“Ok so would you do the dishes for me? Oh oh and cook dinner too that would be absolutely fantastic”

Rooster wasn’t too happy with that response smh

SKJDJDJD I GET SO DISTRACTED ANYWAYS

rooster baby would go to any games when he has free time

Analyzes your movements a lot

But he’s never deeply judging you in a negative way, he’s just observing

Becomes your personal trainer but would never push you too hard

Always after matches no matter if you win or not he’ll always have some version of “you did well baby, now drink some water I’m not letting you be dehydrated”

Always gives you a meaningful hug too

Kisses are also a definite must

One on your forehead, nose and three on the lips

It’s like a secrete combination just between the two of you

Even tho it’s not even like a lock or some shit

It always amazing him how you do certain things when your focused into your game

Sometimes laughs at how cute you are

Just being a proud parent boyfriend is all you need

#lizandbo #Kuroo x reader #kuroo fluff #kuroo hcs #kuroo headcanons #kuroo x volleyball player reader #Bokuto fluff #bokuto hcs #bokuto headcanons #bokuto x reader #bokuto imagines #kuroo imagines #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu masterlist #tsukishima fluff #tsukishima hcs #tsukishima x reader #tsukishima imagines

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milky-rozen · 1 month ago

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Hello 🤗, I’ve kind been following your project for months now and I have to say I’m glad people are still acknowledging Egyptian Mythology. I know it doesn’t really have all the drama and pizzaz I suppose Greek or Roman mythos does which is why people like it more, however I find your work refreshing because it seems like you actually care about Egyptian Mythos. I’ve been obsessed with it for years and I’ve even done my own research over the years myself and could never fully understood why people didn’t care for it as much. Even after watching Hollywood Blockbuster films like “Gods of Egypt” the movie frustrated me in so many ways but the biggest one being that it felt like a knockoff of Clash of the Titans. So I’m done with my little rant but I was curious on what sparked your interest in making this project? How often are you taking creative liberties with your story? Also how do you come up with such creative designs for your characters will also keeping the historical consistency of Ancient Egypt?

P.S. Hope this all made sense 😀

Heya!

So, first of all, thank you so much for your kind words, they really made my day!

Second of all, let me reply to all of your questions in order so I don't forget anything lol

Ok so, as for what sparked my interest in making this project, It all started with me playing a mythology-themed video game called Dislyte. I've always been into Egyptian Mythology since I can remember, but when I was a kid, things were a bit different from now and I didn't have access to the Internet as I have now as my father would set up a limited screen time for me and my sister on the computer, and also at that time, I just didn't know how to research things properly lol. So, nostalgia led me to explore new and old media about Egyptian mythology and do some proper academic research to get to know the main and minor myths better. During this "research phase" I discovered the Korean manhwa Ennead, which inspired me and my character designs a lot. Afterwards, as I realized how little material exists about this mythology in particular, I decided to create something myself that could help fill that gap, something that could bring people together and spark their interest so that I could have someone to talk to about Egyptian Mythology lmaooo. But also, I always wanted to work on an original comic series and so I thought that this could have been the best time to start! And so, House of the Sun was born!

Now, talking about artistic liberty, it really depends on the comic we're talking about. In Thoth's Library, I try to be as accurate as possible to the actual myths, only taking some artistic liberty when I need to link some facts that would otherwise sound a bit random and incohesive to the narration, adding some motivations and sub-plots to link all the stories together while trying to stay true to the original sources. Although, this might change in some future arcs. In Young Horus, although some connections are accurate, I decided to fill all the gaps I could with an original coming-of-age story for Horus the Younger to create something new and have fun with it, so the majority of the things happening in the comic are purely fictional. Of course, I always make sure to put a disclaimer for that in every episode just in case ahahah

As for the inspiration behind the character designs, I wanted to create something very personal and somewhat accurate in terms of clothing and overall presentation without including those classic elements we all know, like the animal heads or masks we often see in other media. I was especially inspired by something I noticed in Ancient Egyptian art, like the fact that some gods like Ra have both a human and animal form, and so I was like, you know what? I'm leaving the animal iconography to other contexts, I'm going full human this time lmao. Well, kind of, since I still wanted to include some animal traits that are very iconic to Egyptian art, like the tails (often used in classic Egyptian iconography to depict power and royalty), the ears and sometimes the paws too because, why not? 😂

Man, this was a very long reply lol I tried to be as brief as possible but I'm not good at it honestly ahah soooo, thanks for sticking with me so far! 😂 and, oh! Before I forget , Happy New Year!

#milky answers #house of the sun

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saddled-on-stars · 3 months ago

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hello S-O-S! Rea here. I was wondering if I could ask for a request...

Would you be open to a BJ x Reader where the reader struggles with self-destructive behaviors like picking skin, pulling hair and even sometimes more straightforward self-injury? If you don't that's fine of course i know it's a sensitive subject but I need some comfort from Beej for my bald-spot and picked-to-oblivion skin on my fingers 😅

your mutual and friend,

Rea ♥

Okay, firstly, I am here to talk if you ever need it, I see you as a friend and I care about you, so my dm's are always open :) I'm sorry that this took me so long, it's been a really long day, sigh I HOPE THAT YOU ARE OKAY THO, BECAUSE IF YOU'RE NOT, I'M FINDING YOUR HOUSE AND BRINGING YOU FEEL-BETTER-TACOS. Second of all, I'm going to assume that you want a Musical-Juice x reader? If not, I am 100% willing to rewrite to a different version. I'm also going to assume that this is like me, (aside from the direct self injury, that will be another feeling), and this will be done out of nervousness or fear? I've never been diagnosed with anxiety, and I'm sort of too afraid to ask a doctor lmao, so I just have always said that I don't have it, but one of my friends says that I've been showing signs lately. (They have anxiety, so I understand what the symptoms are, so I can interpret that into writing hopefully!) (They also have ADHD, and they said that I show signs of either that or ADD.) But the main reason of this is to just see it for a perspective for you that's as accurate as possible, I hope that's alright. SORRY I GOT OFF TRACK, LMAO, ANYWAYS, HERE YA GO LOVELY REA! <3

*(sorry that this took me so long!!)

Happy reading! - Star ★

-★-★-★-★-★-★-★- Trigger Warnings: Self Harm, Cutting/Blood, Skin Picking, Hair Pulling, Explicit Language -★-★-★-★-★-★-★- Key: ★ (Y/N) = Your Name ★ (L/N) = Last Name -★-★-★-★-★-★-★-

- ★ - Haunted Healing - ★ -

God, you wish you hadn't done it, the whole situation, you mean.

It had started as such a small thing—you were out at the mall with one of your good friends from work. But then it started to pile, picking up all the other bits of stress you’d been pushing down for who knows how long.

It had been a long day as it is, and you were over-the-top stressed. To put it simply, you were so burnt out that you felt like a candle, with only the black wick. You told yourself you’d keep it together this time, but the emotions just kept building, clawing their way to the surface.

And then, there it was. That careless comment from them, your friend, who meant well, but who didn’t really understand. “You’re so sensitive about shit. You need to lighten up!”, they told you in the middle of the food court.

Internally, your world just ended. 'Oh fuck, they don't like the way I am. I really AM insensitive, aren't I? I just wanted them to fucking like me. I want them to-.. to...'

The next thing you know, you're back in your bedroom, curled up into a tight ball on your bed.

Fuck, you don't know what to do, so you just zone out, and go into auto-pilot mode.

You're twirling your hair in your fingers absentmindedly, twisting the strands in little coils.

Pluck- that's one.

Well, everyone knows that nothing stops at one. You make it to 14 strands, still zoned out, your fingers moving from your hair to your fingers.

Ugh, the skin is so dry around the fingernails. It's like it's being BEGGED to be picked. Pick, pick, pick...

Pluck, pluck, pluck...

Your mind is still elsewhere, wondering what you could have done different, and you're not in the moment, unable to realize what you're doing, but then you flash back to reality.

Tears sting the backs of your eyelids, and without a second thought, you throw off your hoodie, and grab the pair of scissors in your nightstand drawer.

You don't even think about what you're doing, you just do it. Before you know it, blood is trickling down your arm, dropping off of your elbow, onto the hardwood floor.

Trying to stop the tears now is useless. Your shoulders are heaving up and down during your shaky sobs, despite you STILL being absent in the mind.

Suddenly, before you can do anymore to your scalp, your arms, and your fingers, you throw your hoodie back on, and throw the scissors back in your drawer.

The idea pops into your head, and you could REALLY use a talk-to-Beej right now.

"B-Beetlejuice, Beet-tlejuice, Beetlej-juice.", you manage to stutter out, your breath still shaky from your sobs.

"It's showtime~."

You don't even have to look up to see his cocky personality poof into the room, but you notice that his demeanor quickly changes. He rushes over to you, frantically trying to speak to you, but your hearing is still muffled.

"Babes? Babes?? Cmon' babes, talk to me. What's wrong? Babes!"

It's starting again.

You continue to pluck the oh so small follicles from your head, and your fingernails don't stand a chance anymore.

Fuck, is it hot in here? You could have sworn two seconds ago that you were freezing.

You pull up the sleeves on your hoodie absentmindedly, still somewhat zoned out, but at least you can see Beej now, maybe not the best thing right now.

His hair, gone completely white, signifying his total, utter shock, as his face following the pale pursuit.

Oh shit, your hearing is clearing up. Do you really want it to, though?

"B-Babes, d-did you do this t-to yourself?", Beej asks with tears in his eyes. He moves his hands from your arms to hold your own hands. Pulling your hands up to his mouth, he just holds them against the stubble, the cries threatening to spill.

Oh damn, that one hurt, right to the core. You didn't want to upset him; you didn't want to make him cry; this is the first time you've ever seen him cry.

Closing your eyes, you nod and put your head down to face your lap. 'SHIT, WHY'D I DO IT? Beej is unhappy now! Beej is crying. Beej hates you...', you can't help but think to yourself. Now it's your turn to let the tears fall, and you feel something comforting against your cheek.

It's Beej's hand. He's looking at you with a tearstained face, but his hair now a pale green, a mix between the white and his neutral color.

Climbing up onto the bed, he picks you up in his arms in the process, and he lays you to where you're sitting sideways in his lap. Your head is up against his neck in a comforting manner, and he's rubbing circles on your back in comfort.

Pressing a kiss to your hair, you can't help but snuggle closer to him, finally letting go. Your arms instinctively wrap around his torso, your face burying into that striped shirt and green tie of his.

"I've got you Babes, all the time. I'm always here.", he says as his hands wrap around your back, as your now fully pressed against him.

"You don't have to face this alone. Whatever it is, I still love you. Always have, Babes. I don't hate you, I'm not mad at you, I don't think you're stupid. I don't know what's running through that pretty little head of yours right now, but I do know that it isn't right, because whatever you think that I think? It ain't true, Babes.", he says, his arms squeezing you slightly tighter.

Burying your face into his shoulder, you nod, acknowledging him, "I-I love you t-too...", you say, the sobs and sniffles still overtaking your voice.

He squeezes you once more, realizing that you've fallen asleep, and he presses a kiss to your head, careful not to harm the scalp.

"Sweet dreams, Babes."

- ★ - Written by Saddled_On_Stars - ★ -

#beetlejuice #beetlejuice the musical #musicaljuice #beetlejuice broadway #beetlejuice x reader #beetlejuice x y/n #musical beetlejuice x reader #my post #my writing #fics

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itsravenbitch · 2 years ago

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LMFAOO raven stop i literally had tears on my screen😂😂😂 just imagine me smiling with tears falling down my face and little sniffles💀anyway i’m better now so there shouldn’t be any typos.

okay so lemme tell you how dinner went. well actually before we get there lemme tell you how it was meeting my new family lol. so after i had finished getting ready i was too damn nervous to walk out i had to do some deep breaths. when i walked out my room and downstairs (also our house is different, i forgot to mention that cause that wasn’t really important to me in the moment) my sisters were out in the backyard taking pictures and stuff, while my two brothers and my dad were sitting on the couch just waiting since dudes get ready in 15 seconds no matter where they’re going LFMAO😭 and RAVEN tell me why my brother, the one i hugged while crying, gonna say ‘ah the random cry baby is ready’😂😂😂😂 it was not random he needs to stop lol he just don’t know. i told him to shut up and then i started to walk to my parents room to see my mom cause i knew she’d be in there still getting ready. everything was natural. that was one thing i was nervous about, whether or not it would be weird cause i didn’t know anyone. but i realized that they’re a product of MY consciousness, i made them lol so why wouldn’t i be familiar with them?

now! the dinner. we went to pappadeaux (i got mozzarella cheese bites shit was so good) and the way there was genuine laughs and conversation flowing around the table was so refreshing. ugh it just feels so good and the great thing is, it feels just as good as it did in imagination. what i felt in my fulfilled imagination is EXACTLY how i feel now! i’m gonna have this stupid smile on my face for a minute 😭😭 i love my family, all of them. and that’s 7 words i couldn’t say for my old one.

here’s the ask for this response

HOLD THE FUCK UP!! you went to PAPPADEAUX, a SEAFOOD restaurant, and ordered MOZZARELLA BITES??? you’re one of thoseee?? i should delete ts fr😭i’m appalled!

aside from that i’m weak ass hell cause yo brother really ain’t have to say that! like excuse me sir..? but at the same time i understand why he did🤣

i love that you mentioned the way you felt in imagination is exactly how you feel currently! that definitely speaks volume to the fact that imagination is powerful and literally creates reality!

and then men being ready in 15 seconds is very much so accurate lmao😂 then it’s just pressure to get ready before they start complaining

anyway i love love LOVED your story and feel free to send in more success stories <3

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jamiehashands · 2 months ago

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Can you ramble about Ellis ggy?

Okay, okay, where to start, I think there’s like, a lot to go over so I’m gonna try to start from the beginning. This is gonna be a long post so strap in folks. (and ignore my discord nickname, it's an inside joke)

The Descent into Madness

Back in January/February of this year I decided to pick up writing as a hobby, I started off with little blurbs of a potential SB rewrite I had cooking up (and still cooking up today), however that’s not relevant to Ellis, so I’m skipping to the fic he’s actually include in. So, on February 4th I drew this as a joke, but then I wanted to expand on it and make it a fic.

(You can tell this is old by how light Ellis is and comparing him to my current design LMAO) (and the "like the show?" is supposed to be a reference to transformers)

That being said, that fic wasn’t even entirely focused on him, the basic premise was Greg came out to Ellis as nonbinary and Ellis would go “like the code??? XDDDD!!!!”, isn't he so quirky and not like other girls?? /j

“Guys the worms” haha, if only you knew dude.

Okay anyways, the thing was, I don’t think I got that far into reading GGY because most of it SUCKED and was really out of character. I didn’t even used the names “Rab” or “Boots” which actually annoys me so bad I don’t even wanna look at it. Sorry to the Instagram followers who wanted to see it, it’s in the garbage now and I hate it, but that’s completely okay! It was a learning experience for me, which lead me to my next fic that I am. Technically. Still. Working on.

I think this was the moment I realized I grew to be in love with Ellis’s “character”, in quotation marks because he’s not really a character y’know. This is also when I found a way to read GGY properly, so that means I’d have my fic more accurate. I actually documented my reading on my instagram (same username) if you’re interested, though it’s kind of corny looking back on it, definitely exaggerated some of my opinions on it.

If you follow my Instagram, you can see in a story I revealed that I currently find the fic really unfun to work on, and that I enjoyed working on a different one. Let me just explain, I believe that the fic is like, angst with no merit, someone might enjoy reading something like that but I don’t like writing it personally. Right now, I’m in the process of replanning, which is why I’d like to thank our today’s sponsor, Milanote!!!1! Kidding, but Milanote has genuinely made things easier for me it’s kind of insane. Obviously I’m going to keep some aspects in the fic (not spoiling though ^_^) but I hope to make it fun for me to work on again this time around.

I forgot to put my uquiz answer description thing I make for him here wait:

Ellis has a minor role in the short story ‘GGY.’ He is described as being impatient nearly all of the time, bouncing on his heels when he is. He often jokes around with his friend Tony, purposely calling him Tinkerbell instead of the pseudonym Tarbell, and telling him that he thinks too much. He immediately brushes off the writing assignment in Mrs. Soto’s class, saying that the story is due in two weeks and they’ve got plenty of time.

His dad insists that Sundays are for family time. He considers Tony’s real life investigations lame, making a dramatic snoring sound effect when Tony tells him he was people watching. At the end of GGY, Ellis ends up changing Tony’s story completely, albeit probably because of manipulation from Greg/GGY himself, he also compliments the changes they made by saying “it gets better.” (It doesn’t get better they’re probably going to get an F 🫶)

Ellis Fan Design(s)

In this section I’m just going to be rambling about Ellis fan designs, not naming any names though because it’s not really a specific design, just specific design aspects. Soo my first thing is: please stop making him grey/ashy or hell, incredibly light😢😢😢 it reminds me of when I was like 11 and all of my black characters were borderline grey. My second thing is that I’ve seen a handful of designs where he just. Doesn’t have curly hair. It annoys me sooo bad like guys please 😕😕 umm another thing is when people don’t give his square jaw, like maybe they do but it’s just really subtle??? Idk!!!

Anyways my Ellis design went through many changes actually, but one thing that remained consistent was the long hair with the. Brown?? Idk how to describe it lmao. Here are some sketches from old sketchbooks!! There are some more but those are kind of spoiler territory for my fic so >_>,, gotta wait another 8 months for those! /j

Way before these sketches were even created, I had an idea on how Ellis would dress, it's um. It's definitely a fashion statement...!

These were the drawings that had the designs I wanted to stick with, and have stuck with to this day! I took the idea that he would be a Monty fan and ran with it, for the jacket you can actually see it in the "im nonbinary" "like the code???" doodle I did, however looking back the short sleeved jacket and the long sleeved was kind of ugly.. In one of the doodles above, I drew him with ripped jeans, while they're quite fun they wouldn't really fit with the design I have now (and also I can't fit the rips on the current jeans anywhere)

However, that is old art, so here is his current ref I made for art fight! You can actually view his profile here!!!

The he/him/she/her pronouns (for simplification reasons I will only be using he/him in this post) and his birthday being on April 5th actually has some reason to it BUT we are not there yet!!! Oh!! And what's that thing at the bottom? Songs I associate with him?? what!!!

Ellis Playlist WHATT

Pretend I had a really smooth transition into this next topic, ANYWAY!! I'm going to pick a small handful of songs from the playlist and make them relate to Ellis in some way, because I. am really normal. ════════════════════════════════════════════

ᴺᴼᵂ ᴾᴸᴬᵞᴵᴺᴳ : Just Take My Wallet - Jack Stauber's Micropop

hope you like the formatting on this section, anyway

Your mama's crying Your mama's crying for you Mama's lying Oh, what's she trying to do To you?

I think this is self explanatory, after Tony's mom lost her only son a natural instinct is to cry her eyes out. For the "Mama's lying" part I'm just going to bullshit an answer that's relevant to the fic I'm writing. Sooo, in the context that is Ellis being like, y'know, sad, his mom would obviously try to comfort him, and since I hc that he blames himself somewhat, she'd try to tell him it isn't his fault and such, however Ellis doesn't believe that, which is where the "lying" part comes in. For the last two parts, Tony's parents actively tried to change what Tony wrote stories about, aka kind of changing his whole shtick idk.

Good times are singing They sang, they sang Those times are echoing through me Through me

Another theme in my fic is that Ellis reminisces, A LOT. Like first few paragraphs he's like "I miss my friends bro what the fuck!!!!!!!!11"

What's the softest way to say You took away my friend, my buddy? What's the kindest way to say You took away my friend? What's the kindest way to say You took away my friend, my buddy? What's the kindest way to say The end?

In this little animatic idea in my head, this is the part where Ellis and Gregory reunite and Ellis comes to the realization he killed Tony, "The end?" represents them cutting ties with each other, because there's no way their relationship can be healthy anymore. OR IS THERE?? DUN DUN DUNNNNN....

════════════════════════════════════════════

ᴺᴼᵂ ᴾᴸᴬᵞᴵᴺᴳ : Boys Don't Cry - The Cure

I would say I'm sorry If I thought that it would change your mind But I know that this time I have said too much Been too unkind

After Tony gets really pissed with Ellis, Ellis didn't realize what was wrong until later, in which he'd want to apologize and change Tony's mind about not wanting him to work on any writing assignment with him anymore. However he had done too much damage he can't undo, and also Tony is dead but SHHHH SHHHH

I tried to laugh about it Cover it all up with lies I tried to laugh about it Hiding the tears in my eyes 'Cause boys don't cry Boys don't cry

Ellis, being the comedic type in my hc (and many other's I think), would use humor to cover up his feelings by using humor as a coping mechanism y'know? "Boys don't cry" was/still is quite the common mindset, assuming Ellis would believe in said mindset, he's given another reason to not cry. Sorry that's probably a reach HELP.

I would break down at your feet And beg forgiveness, plead with you But I know that it's too late And now there's nothing I can do

I'm pretty sure Ellis would do anything to get Tony back, your honor that was his BEST BUDDY. The last two lines are obvious because Tony is like, dead,,,,, anyways skipping the next section because I'd just repeat myself

I would tell you that I loved you If I thought that you would stay But I know that it's no use And you've already gone away

Ok actually I'm gonna be repeating myself regardless because something something Ellis doesn't want Tony to leave but it's too late and Tony leaves and then dies blahhhh

Misjudged your limits Pushed you too far Took you for granted Thought that you needed me more, more, more

In GGY, Tony brings up that Ellis is very immature and feels as if he is outgrowing him, Ellis changing up his story is what broke the camels back, which is where "misjudged your limits/pushed you too far/took you for granted" comes in, Ellis, thinking Tony thought of him as someone he couldn't lose, so it'd hurt when Tony seemed to drop him just like that (ok well to him it seems unexpected but y'know, Tony's "im not like other girls" inner monologues. (kidding))

Now I would do most anything To get you back by my side But I just keep on laughing Hiding the tears in my eyes 'Cause boys don't cry Boys don't cry Boys don't cry

For the first two lines, I immediately think of @kai-rio 's (sorry for the @ lmk if you want to be removed but also you're really normal about Ellis like me so) Ellis fic, you can read it right here, um, in the briefest summary I can give of the first part, Ellis goes "omg I need to find Tony !!!!! >_<" and like plans. to go to that. like he gets geared up /j. I'd make a joke about the ending but that'd be SPOILERS.... anyways refer to what I said before for the other lines.

════════════════════════════════════════════

ᴺᴼᵂ ᴾᴸᴬᵞᴵᴺᴳ : I Can't Handle Change - Roar

Hangin' out where I don't belong is nothing new to me I get tired, and I get sick, and then I lose the strength to leave

If anyone reading this saw that. dumbass papa louie pals scene I made, I hc Ellis to be like!!! really alienated from everyone even if he comes off as an extrovert (im giving him every mental illness Ellis im sorry). Funny fact, in one of my ideas for the Ellis fic rework, I have a point that says "mention Ellis constantly feeling sick", not in the literal sense obviously, but it ties in with this lyric methinks.

I can't handle change I can't handle change

Ellis is left grieving the loss of his friend, a change, like the lyric says, he can't handle/accept

Nothing I do is ever good Nothing I do is ever good enough Nothing I do is ever good Nothing I do is ever good Nothing I do is ever good enough Nothing I do is ever good

Did I mention I'm giving him every mental illness ever (/j) well that also includes an inferiority complex, really ties in with the feeling alienated from everyone thing, yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Leave me alone Leave me alone (I wanna go home now) Leave me alone Leave me alone (I wanna go home now)

Guys would you be shocked if I said that I interpret this as Ellis wanting to be left alone??!????!???!?! "I wanna go home now" makes me think of this scene in my fic where Ellis remembers Tony's funeral (you can't spell funeral without fun btw! /j) and wanting to leave like 30 minutes in because he felt so overwhelmed

I can't help but repeat myself I know it's not your fault Still lately, I begin to shake For no reason at all For no reason at all For no reason at all For no reason at all For no reason at all

This would be Ellis to Greg, as Tony's death technically wasn't his fault, but he has to repeat it in his head like a mantra because Greg and GGY shared the same face and it's hard to separate the two from one another. Shaking for seemingly no reason is a symptom of anxiety, and if you checked Ellis's art fight page that I really need to revamp, it's stated he has that so!!! yay!!!!!!!!!!

G-g-g-grellis… VOMITS IN MOUTH. /j (and shipping in the GGY community in general ig)

I think I’m like the only person who ships this now,,,,, Ummmm I just wanna say I don’t really take this shipping thing too seriously because they’re just middle school kids and they’re bound to be silly/awkward. Obviously they do have potential to be really angsty like “oh my god you killed my best friend why do I still love you? Is it because I’m still in love with the person you pretended to be?” Or something idk it’s dumb I like to focus on the sillier things like passing notes in class, trash talking teachers they don’t like, and sharing snacks with each other or whatever.

Absolutely unrelated but can we NOT use the term "yaoi" to describe the relationship between two middle schoolers like, i'm sorry that's just hella weird. Sorry if this is flipline addictspilled flipline addictsmaxxing /inside joke but it's like saying "middle school boy yaoi" like is that NOT weird to you? Also I've seen some really iffy ship art and whenever I come across it I just think to myself: "bro aren't they like twelve???" And I’ve seen no one acknowledge it in the tags of the art, and I’ve brought it up to a friend who is an outsider to the GGY community and they thought the same thing too. Look. Maybe I’m just aroace and believe that romance shouldn’t all be about kissing and shit but someone here has got to agree right 😕

Anyways back to Grellis!!! When I first saw them, I thought their alternative ship name, “Grel”, was “Gel”, and I thought that was the funnier shit ever. You might be asking why I ship them and it’s because like, they’re seen interacting with each other for most of the story, and I don’t have to rely on post-canon “what-ifs” to get their relationship to work.

Ummm for their dynamic I already said they're just silly middle schoolers so. go my grellis related pics

also they play roblox together and watch the mlp eq movies but at the same time they head bang to death metal. Uhh I'm not gonna write about how I think these songs are so them(tm) but two songs I associate with them are Romantic Lover by Eyedress, and Door by iDKHOW. Also my friend @rippcharddrive drew them for an art fight attack and it was the best day of my life

now one might be asking, "why the fuck is NuMarcus from Papa Louie there" well!!!

NUTIMM (And Papa Louie in general)

Now you might remember when I said that I hc Ellis to be born on April 5th and use he/she pronouns and that we'll come back to that later. The reason is Papa Louie, okay well, NuTimm (Timm x NuMarcus) specifically, but Papa Louie in general. But before we get into it, I edited Ellis in the Flipline Style once ^_^

Ok so really short origin story of NuTimm is that it started off as a joke and two of my friends role played them breaking up, but Niall (rippcharddrive) started getting attached to it. Sooner or later he added them to his tomodachi life island and on March 31st 2024, they got together!!! and got married in under and hour of doing so!!! Now, how does this relate to Ellis? well on April 3rd, Timm got knocked up bro /JJJ

Niall didn't know what to name the baby so I jokingly suggested the name Ellis and everyone else liked it so the baby was going to be named Ellis!!

And on April 5th (I think you can understand why that's his birthday now), she was born!!! And everyone in du2 thought she was ugly </3

To make a long story short they ended up having like 7 more kids I think I forgot, and many more grandkids. Then one day I decided to get Tomodachi Life myself (with the help of Niall), made my own island and added fnaf Ellis and NuTimm Ellis to it, long story short they fell in love and eventually got married and became the gayest straight couple (/j). NuMarcus, wanting to give Ellis a head start in parenting, made 2 NuBaby's, each of which have incredibly long and stupid names because Ellis wanted to piss him off.

BUT THEN... THE PLOT THICKENS. On Nialls island, Gregory and NuTimm Ellis fell in love and also got married, thus forming the most confusing love triangle of all time. IM RUNNING OUT OF IMAGES BUT here is when I started using he/she for Ellis

ok guys pretend i have a really good transition to the next and probably last section

Headcanons (shocked face emoji)

I've mentioned multiple of my Ellis hcs in the song portion but I haven't really made an entire list of them so!! Here we go guys!!! We're at the homestretch!!!

- ummm neurodivergent (AuDHD), I interpret him bouncing his heels in that one scene in GGY as his stimming thanks, he also quotes memes as a vocal stim pray for him /jjj - types with a lot of emoticons and exclamation marks - laughs at the dumbest crap ever, you could show him the "she strogan me off till i beef" video and he'd cry laughing - somehow knows every unblocked games website - Picks at his. acne all the time - Knows the" most obscure ass media, he'll go up to Tony and Greg and be like: "Have you guys heard of Zigglyblorfblorf??" and they'll be like "???? WHAT????" - Wanted to become a youtuber when he was way younger because he thought it would be easy and it would make him look cool and awesome (his parents did NOT approve). Speaking of parents I made. fan designs. for them. SEE GUYS I AM SO NORMAL!!! THEY TOTALLY DONT HAVE THEIR OWN LORE OR ANYTHING!!! and totally can't be their own standalone characters1!!!

- Ellis is quite fond of dancing actually ^_^ boogieing and jiving is something he likes - Cuts the fat off his steak before eating it, he HATES the texture - Very emotional/sensitive :// - he sort of kind of lets his full personality show around Tony and Greg which kinda makes the whole “Tony feels like he’s outgrowing Ellis and thinking he’s immature” worse maybe because idk. Differences. - 5'4-5'6 ft tall idk idk - he probably dies ngl /j

- love-hate relationship with slasher films

- on one hand he’s like “hahahah people dying XD I’m so different!!” And genuinely just being squeamish.

Conclusion

um so. i'm glad you've read this far. thanks for reading about my insane thoughts about Ellis GGY uhhh TLDR:

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papyrusgayfont · 2 years ago

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* didn’t even realize this until now but I actually really hate how movie!Luka’s design stripped away all the uniqueness from his design

* like in the show he has painted nails, earrings, designs on his sneakers, has stripes on his shirt, has bracelets on his right arm and a ring on his left hand, and his hair is dark blue/black with light blue tips, and in the movie, his nails aren’t painted, he has no earrings, his sneakers are plain black, his bracelets and ring were taken away, his shirt, aside from Jagged’s face, is all white, and his hair is entirely light blue

* like hey Zag would it really cost you that much to add, any of these features? I don’t see why these changes, even if they are small, were made when everyone is almost 100% intact (except for Alya’s hair but other people have already talked about that and I agree with them)

* it really just seems like they tried to make him as plain as possible and I hate that lmao, especially when they had like 5 years to fix the design (ok I don’t want to say “fix” but like, make the design more accurate)

EDIT: @among-us-fungus pointed out that Luka’s shirt stripes aren’t stripes, they are rips in the shirt, sorry for that misinfo (the points still stand though)

#miraculous ladybug #ladybug #cat noir #chat noir #marinette dupain cheng #adrien agreste #luka couffaine #viperion #miraculous tales of ladybug and cat noir #miraculous awakening #miraculous the movie #miraculous le film #ladybug and cat noir awakening #ladybug and cat noir the movie

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eddiessluttywaist · 2 years ago

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desiderium

an eddie munson series

AGELESS/BLANK/UNDER 18 BLOGS ARE NOT WELCOME TO INTERACT. PLEASE RESPECT MY RULES AND BOUNDARIES.

summary: eddie’s odd, forgotten childhood friend seeks him out when he needs her more than he realizes.

pairing: bsf!mechanic!bartender!eddie x eccentric!bsf!fem!reader

word count: 7,488 words

content/warnings: eventual smut so MDNI, fluff, swearing, blood (accidental cut), mentions of bullying, low self esteem, anxiety, mentions of embarrassment and shame, mentions of a history of bad relationships, smoking, car trouble (sorry if any of the car stuff isn’t accurate lmao). i think that’s it!

a/n: sorry for taking so long to update! i've been very busy. i hope you enjoy the new chapter! creds to whoever owns and posted those ^ photos! they’re not mine, i just made the collage!

part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - part 5

“You what?” The man on the other line cackled in Eddie’s ear. “Ro- Robin! No, you gotta come here! Eddie called some chick a ‘good girl’. He totally scared her off, it’s hilarious.”

“Thank you, Harrington, you’re really helping me in my time of need,” Eddie seethed as he laid in bed. He heard some shuffling and then a familiar feminine voice sounded from the telephone.

“‘Good girl’? What is she? A dog?”

Eddie ran his hands over his face, jostling his bangs away from his forehead before suddenly jerking them away in gestures they couldn’t even see as he let out a bitter laugh.

“Why did I even call you two? I’m regretting so many choices today.”

“So, she didn’t like it?” Steve asked as Robin complained about him crowding the phone.

“Go use the one in the living room— no— stop-”

“This is my room. You go use the living room phone.”

“Ugh, you’re breathing on me, dingus!”

Eddie rolled his eyes over the typical bickering, choosing to focus on the question that actually had to do with their conversation.

“Uh — well — she got all freaked out and everything was awkward. When she was leaving, I was going to open the door for her and she thought I was going to hug her— I-I, ugh, it was horrible. So uhh… yeah, I’d say no. She didn’t like it… at… all.”

“You have zero game, man,” Steve chided after a beat of silence that had forced Eddie to sit with his shame.

“And neither do you.” Robin argued, finally waving him out of his own room. “Don’t listen to him, Eddie, he’s an idiot.”

“Thanks, Robin…,” he muttered even if it didn’t make him feel much better.

“You’re an idiot too, just so we’re clear,” she added, and he nodded despite the fact that — once again — she couldn’t even see him. “I can’t believe you called her a good girl.”

“Okay, how many times are we going to repeat it before I blow my brains out?” Eddie deflated with a distressed laugh, clasping his hands together. He heard another line pick up.

“What’d I miss?”

“Eddie wants to die.”

“I do not blame you, man. You know it’s never too late to come here in Indianapolis. Maybe even change your identity,” Steve suggested as he leaned up against the wall by his other phone, which he had nestled between his ear and his shoulder just like Eddie did.

“Yeah, cause I could afford living in the city,” he snickered mostly to himself before sighing as he ran his hands over his face again.

“Who is she anyway?” Robin wondered.

“She’s his weird, secret friend he’s kept from us,” Steve replied in a mutter.

“No, I- she’s not a secret and she’s not weird,” Eddie huffs. “She’s just… she hasn’t been around in a while. She’s a friend from before I moved in with Wayne.”

“Oh… oh,” Robin’s interest piqued again. “So, she’s like… a best-best friend?”

“He totally wants to nail her,” Steve tacked on, and Eddie found himself groaning as he sunk further into his bed, wishing it would swallow him whole.

“I don’t wan — will you quit it? Yes, we were very close.”

“And she just happened to show up out of nowhere. I’m telling you, Ed, she wants you. You should go for it. You haven’t been laid since Chrissy…,” Steve muttered that last comment, and Robin squeezed her eyes shut as she facepalmed.

“Or she could just need a friend…?” Robin countered, her voice weakly lilting upwards as she corrected him. She just hoped the Chrissy comment wouldn’t be enough to make Eddie draw back into himself.

“She knew you when you were kids. I’m sure you were just as weird as a little child Eddie, so I doubt she was all that fazed by you calling her uh… the thing you called her.”

“Maybe…,” Eddie muttered, picking at his nails and biting at them.

He was tired. That tea really did help, even if his exhaustion was put on hold by an absurd amount of embarrassment and anxiety. He could feel himself settling again, his eyelids getting heavier.

“I should go.”

Robin squeezed her eyes shut again and mentally chastised Steve for bringing up Chrissy so carelessly.

“Call us again. Okay, weirdo? To update us?” Robin urged, feeling a surge of protective instinct.

He was never around anymore, never called; and there was always this anxiety in the back of her mind that he wasn’t letting them know if things were getting too hard for him. Neither Steve nor she could figure out when they could check in on him because he never bothered to share his schedule with them. And when they did call it was incredibly rare for him to pick up. She couldn’t blame him for wanting to shut everyone out, but it only made her worry about what was going on with him.

“I don’t wanna bother you guys. I know you’re busy with city life,” Eddie teased with a playful theatricality to his tone, but his voice was soft with that creeping exhaustion.

“Nah, you know you can call whenever,” Steve replied, taking a break from his incessant joking to let some of his sincerity come through. “Plus, I gotta hear more about this secret girl.”

“Not a secret,” Eddie corrected, his eyes closing to soothe his urge to drift off, one brow raising lazily with his words.

“Just call, okay? Or we’ll keep bugging you until you update us,” Robin urged, a sing-song tone coming to her voice.

“Fine,” Eddie snickered, and this time he was actually able to get a goodbye in and sloppily slam his phone back down before knocking out.

There was only crackling now on the line between the two roommates.

“I worry about him,” Robin spoke up suddenly, just loud enough for Steve to catch her concerned voice.

“I know,” Steve sighed, placing the phone back onto the wall. “I do too.”

You had no intentions of ignoring Eddie after that night in his trailer, not explicitly anyways. You were still thinking about him constantly, but any pleasant thoughts were immediately invaded by embarrassment. It felt like you were experiencing it all over again and the accompanying swirl to your gut was overwhelming.

The reality of the next couple of Eddie-less days was that you were too engrossed in the aftereffects of that awkward exchange to reach out first, not to mention most of your attention going to your first job here in Hawkins. Despite your nerves, you did surprisingly well on Thursday and Friday night. Enough to get a small smile to bristle Ron’s bearded face and a mutter about maybe needing to get a new name tag ready. You were unbelievably cheery over the praise and acceptance, but you still had one more test to pass: weekend shifts. Those were their busiest, especially Saturday nights. If you make it from 4 o’clock to midnight with no major screw ups then you had the job. He promised.

So yes, you were actively avoiding being the first one to call, but to be fair you were also trying to attend to other aspects of your new life in Hawkins. Your focus was being diverted to getting this job, and spending time with Martha. You were distracted by moments of promising renewal in anticipation of the growing presence of Autumn — despite the crushing embarrassment of the other night.

That didn’t mean you weren’t thinking of him, though. If you weren’t shaking off the recent memory of Wednesday night, then you were indulging in the recent memory of Wednesday night. Him having you over; you making him tea; feeling close to him again as you exchanged stories — laughing together and smiling so hard the muscles in your cheeks hurt a little. The kind of pure smile you only got when you were with Eddie.

You thought about him as you styled your hair in a manner that helped to boost your confidence but wouldn’t get in your way during your shift. You couldn’t believe he had his own place, no matter how “shitty” he said it was. You couldn’t believe he was a tattooed mechanic and had hair. That was the real kicker for you. He didn’t have it shaved so close that he felt like a peach when you patted at the top of his head just to get on his nerves.

He had those long spirals that you wanted to reach across his small kitchen counter and swirl around your finger. Those curls inspired a habit of tilting his head to let his big brown eyes hide under his messy bangs; or sometimes he toyed with his curls to pull a chunk of it in front of his face. It was fascinating to see the way his features and behaviors have adapted to adulthood. Back home he was harassed daily for his “feminine” features, so the fluttery lashes and full lips were nothing new. But now he had grown into his generous mouth and his doe eyes, and so much of his youthful softness had made way for sharp definition — particularly in his jawline and cheekbones. He’s actually grown into the kind of person that intimidated you even if he was just Eddie. He made your palms sweat and had you thinking over every little thing you said. Y’know, things like Loo-ddie. You tried to reassure yourself that you only had nerves because you wanted to have him as a best friend again so badly, but some self-aware part of you knew the signs of an impending crush. Why couldn’t you have some self-control? Why did you have to gush over just about every man who showed you an ounce of kindness?

You wouldn’t admit it to anyone, but you even had brief heart eyes for Ron after seeing how sweet he was with Sandy. It made you yearn for what they had, and you recognized it was more about wanting such a wholesome relationship of your own than wanting someone twice your age, but you still felt ashamed about it. What’s wrong with you? You needed to let bosses stay bosses, and you needed to let best friends stay best friends. You needed Eddie to be a friend, you needed to keep those boundaries in place so you couldn’t ruin everything like always. He’s special, and you can’t just throw yourself at him and offer to give him whatever he wants just so you could feel like his everything — even if it’s only for a few minutes.

You glance at your hands now and fight the urge to chip away at your freshly painted nails to appease your low spirits. You sit with these thoughts for a moment, swallowing moisture back into your throat that felt too tight; then you forced yourself away from the cramped motel bathroom to finish getting ready for your shift. You couldn’t let yourself slip up and distract yourself with your own misery — it was Saturday, and this was your final step towards success. A measly success of a server job at a small-town bar, but you had to put a positive spin on it.

You couldn’t focus on self-loathing, and you couldn’t focus on Eddie.

“A new girl?” Eddie groaned as he rolled his sleeves up to the bends of his elbows. “The last time we had a new person I had to watch him every fucking second cause he had no clue what he was doing — shit, he even stole from you, didn’t he?”

“Yes,” Ron muttered bitterly, never happy about the reminder that someone had been sneaking cash out from under his nose. “She’s pretty good though. Real sweet and does her job.”

“I dunno… do we really need the help?”

“Kevin is back at school. We really need the help,” Ron chuckled, but felt a pang of sadness right to his chest knowing his youngest was back at college — or even in college in the first place — all the same. “Don’t be so sour. She’s a good kid.”

Eddie grumbled irritably but didn’t pester him any further. It was no use anyways. If Ron set his mind on something, then he wasn’t letting up. Sure, it made sense considering it’s his business, but he’s also stubborn as a bull and that quality had a history of surpassing logic sometimes.

About a quarter to four, Eddie was in the back when the bell rang.

“Well look at you, all nice and early again. You suckin’ up?” he heard Ron asking playfully, and Eddie rolled his eyes.

Great. A suck-up.

Just what he needed. Some goody two-shoes setting a new standard that he wouldn’t meet. He was lucky if he was on time in the first place with how much he slept in on the weekends, but Ron was always cutting him slack. Jus’ a small-town bar he’d say whenever Eddie scrambled into the building with an apology already slipping out at an incoherent pace.

He couldn’t hear the new girl’s reply, assuming it had been a nonverbal one rather than one so delicate and quiet that even Ron barely heard it before the novice made her way to the back.

“Hi, I don’t think we’ve worked together yet and I just… wanted… to… Loogie…?”

At the sound of your voice, Eddie was already turning around from where he was opening the recent delivery. His perception of the moment seemed to have been placed in slow motion and suddenly he was heating up with flashbacks of Wednesday night. Called her a good girl, no joke, called her a good girl his mind droned on repeat just to torture him.

“Wha — hey,” he laughed casually and thankfully avoided choking on his own spit. He swallowed thickly and his brow furrowed as his voice came out painfully hoarse. “You’re the new girl?”

“Guess so. If I do well tonight,” you murmured with a small smile, toying with your hands.

You had painted your fingernails a rich burgundy, and his eyes zeroed in on the small strokes of color before looking up at you again.

“I’m sure you’ll be okay, Ron seems really impressed with you…” Eddie offered with a light laugh after clearing his throat, suddenly feeling sheepish around you again.

“Don’t go tellin’ her that! I don’t want her thinking she doesn’t have to work hard tonight!” Ron shouted from the front, pulling a snicker out of you.

You swiftly place your purse on a hook before continuing the conversation. Even if it wasn’t the end of the world if Ron heard your conversation, you took a few steps closer to Eddie and lowered your voice a touch.

“So… did the tea help at all…?” you ask, risking a mention of Wednesday night. You lifted one sneakered foot up onto your toes and shifted nervously before settling it back down as you waited on his reply.

Eddie’s lips pushed out in thought as he brought his attention back to the delivery of nuts and pretzels (really, he was looking for an excuse to not have to look at you as he thought of that night).

“Oh, uh, yeah. Thanks — really helped,” he offered a partial smile as his eyes flitted over to you before turning down again just a fast.

You press your lips together in a weak smile of your own and nod but fall silent. Instead of giving into your urge to pick at your polish, you run the pads of your fingers over the smooth surface of your nails instead.

“‘m sorry for that hug,” you finally blurt out with an uneasy laugh. “I just- I really thought that was why you were reaching over, and I didn’t want to be rude so-”

Eddie’s eyes widened and finally removed himself from his suddenly oh-so-interesting task.

“No no no, you don’t have to apologize,” he promised as he stretched back to his full height. “I should’ve been offering anyw- ah, shit.”

Eddie hissed as he glanced down at his hand. While replying with a fervent need to reassure you, he had thoughtlessly grabbed at the wrong end of the box cutter and sliced the pad of his thumb.

“Oh my god, are you okay?” you rush over to him, instinctively cradling his hand with your own.

“Just a surface cut. Really.” Eddie chuckled. He really needed to go run it under cool water and bandage it, but he wasn’t ready to separate from you.

“What’s going on back there?” Ron questioned from the bar.

“Eddie cut his finger!” you replied as Eddie insisted “Nothing!” simultaneously.

Ron grumbled on his way to his back room that he had turned into a part kitchen, part break room, part delivery storage room. Surely there was some kind of code being broken there, but who cared? Clearly no one around Hawkins.

He eyed the way you two were situated but didn’t think much of it since you were probably just having a natural reaction to someone getting hurt.

“I swear…” he grumbled under his breath on his way over.

“You need to pay attention before you really hurt yourself one of these days,” Ron muttered, and grabbed Eddie’s wrist far harsher than when you reached out for him. “Aren’t you a mechanic? Don’t you know to watch where your hands are, kid?”

You cringed when he wiped at the spot with a rough napkin that sounded like it might as well have been sandpaper against the cut, then grunted.

“It’s fine. Just a bleeder,” he states with all the confidence of a certified physician and ruggedness of an old trucker before tugging up his jeans further into his partial beer gut and walking back out. “You know where the first aid kit is!”

“More than anyone,” Eddie added with a half grin to compliment his self-deprecation as he tilted his head, breathing out a soft laugh.

“Still accident prone, huh?” you ask with a slight scrunch to your nose and a lift to the corners of your lips, watching him head farther back in the multi-faceted room to the employee bathroom.

“Of course. Why wouldn’t I be?” He tilted back out of the room to offer you a cheeky grin, his hair jostling with the motion and then again when he flicked his head to get it out of his face.

“Oh, I dunno… Coulda learned your lesson after face planting into gravel,” you offer with an innocent tone, taking a moment to clock in before sauntering over.

“Well considering that happened several times, you should know better than to assume I’d ever learn,” he whispered playfully, grinning over at you.

“Guess so,” you snort, leaning into the doorframe.

“Had to rough this face up, y’know? Really dedicate myself to becoming a man,” Eddie used a deeper, rougher tone of voice and puffed his chest out as he held a paper towel to his thumb.

“It’s a shame it didn’t work,” you pouted before laughing at the hurt look he donned.

“You wound me, truly,” he moved his good hand to his chest.

“Not as often as you do, apparently,”

“Touché, touché,” he sighed, unclasping the first aid kit and flipping it open. “You’re still a lil shit, y’know that?”

“Can’t help it. Haven’t had anyone to banter with in years,” your head settled against the wood of the doorframe and his own tilted to the side as he regarded you. That smirk of his toyed on his lips as he considered your words.

He’s about to reply — surely with some cheeky remark about you needing him — but Ron was calling before he got the chance.

“Make sure you’re wearing gloves today,” Ron muttered to Eddie without lifting his attention from whatever he was writing down.

“You never wear gloves,” Eddie countered with a childish huff. “Only rich-ass bars in the city give a shit about that crap.”

“Yeah, well I ain’t a health hazard,” he snickered, finally raising his gaze to point his pencil at Eddie’s bandaged finger. “Gloves. Now.”

Eddie rolled his eyes but pulled gloves from the box under the countertop anyways. You’re on the other side of the bar, sitting on a stool and a smile pulling at your lips. Elbows on the countertop and chin balancing on your fists, you watch him intently with little giggles sneaking out.

“Don’t encourage him,” Ron pleads gruffly at the sound of you laughing over Eddie making a big show of pulling out the gloves and slipping them onto his hands.

Once he let each glove snap into place at his wrists, Eddie outstretched his arms and displayed his new accessory.

“Eh? Nice, right? Definitely won’t make everything I touch taste like latex,” Eddie nudged his boss who gave him a less than pleased look, but you were sure he was muffling his own amusement.

“Wanna learn how to bartend?” Ron asks you now. “I think there’ll be an opening soon.”

At that, Eddie leans back with a belly laugh, his dimples sinking into his cheeks.

You had unfortunately started your shift with the assumption that they had been messing with you when Ron and Sandy warned you about Saturday nights. When you arrived just before 4 o’clock there was nearly no one there besides the occasional regular; then twenty minutes past 5 o’clock came along and you were blasted back to Sunday mornings at the diner. The place was packed full of people all chummy with one another, which was charming until they were several drinks in and decided they knew you just as well.

Not all of them, but enough of them were flirting with you at every opportunity; and you were forced to use your customer service manners to deal with them. So many fake smiles were starting to make your cheeks ache.

Returning to the back with an empty tray, you rub at the muscles in one cheek with your free hand. You almost forgot how much service work meant forcing a pleasant attitude and dealing with aching feet. God, that was killing you more than anything. When you were leaving the motel, your trusty sneakers were like walking on clouds. Now, you were certain you had been stomping around on needles.

The music didn’t exactly help with your shift either while trying to hear requests and reply, especially since you weren’t one to use a loud tone. Ron insisted on live music whenever he could get it and you understood the appeal, but the band playing tonight apparently didn’t know how to have a respectable volume set for performing indoors.

You could handle it and you knew you’d form a routine with the locals that rushed in on the weekends and you’d learn how to cope with deafening musicians — you just needed to adjust to your new job.

What you couldn’t handle, as you were quickly learning, was seeing Eddie bartend. It was such a simple act, and yet it left you slack jawed while trying to stay focused on dishing out the drinks he prepared to the right people.

Something about the gloved hands and the rolled-up sleeves as he moved around the bar with such ease left you in the shadow of a crush looming overhead again. His chain bracelet and that familiar beaded bracelet were stacked on one wrist; he even had a few faded tattoos you caught glimpses of in the dim lighting. Not to mention the moving musculature in his strong forearms as he poured and served and wiped with a sort of sloppy expertise. You noticed there wasn’t a lot of mixing around here just like back home. Just a whole lot of small-town people looking for simple alcohol. The older ones seemed partial to a basic glass of whiskey or beer; and the younger ones all hopped up on the fact that they could finally drink legally were requesting shots.

Eddie had tied his hair back in a low bun with the occasional curl rebelling and framing his face that seemed to only be smiling or thinly veiling irritation whenever a mean drunk bitched about him not pouring enough. Either way it truly was something to behold.

As much as his looks should’ve been a passing thought, considering your place as an old friend, they insisted on lingering. You were still adjusting to knowing him this way and the odd disposition between knowing him like no one else and not knowing him at all continued to present a disorienting mix of feelings. The possibility of such complications never occurred to you when you became dead set on coming here, and you hated that you didn’t see it coming or brace yourself for it. Now you were stumbling through moving here for a childhood best friend and winding up finding a man in his place.

Then, of course, your thoughts circled back to your history with men. Don’t go there, don’t go there.

You let out a small sigh and checked the clock. 11:11. So close. So, so close. Before you knew it, it would be time to leave. Glancing at your notepad, you go over what that guy in the sweat stained sports tee asked for his cheap nachos. Extra jalapeños. He insisted on extra jalapeños and went into way too much detail of how “he’d be paying for it in the morning, but they’re just so damn good.”

“Having fun?” Eddie asked after his plodding jog to the back.

“Oh, you bet. An absolute blast,” you laughed, pouring the molten cheese over the thin tortilla chips. “Whatcha doing here?”

“Break,” Eddie answered simply as he flopped down in a chair in the small corner of the space dedicated to the employees. “Ron and Sandy got the bar for now.”

“Ahh,” you hum, spooning the jalapeños on top of the mountain of ingredients.

“Y’know, you’re pretty good at the whole bartending thing. It’s actually kinda cool,” you admitted, glancing over your shoulder to smile over at him.

“I just pour alcohol for the local drunks, but thanks,” Eddie laughed diffidently over the compliment, sliding his metal lunch box closer to get to his baggie of pretzels.

“Is that your dinner?” You ask now, fighting to keep the conversation alive. You’d take talking about pretzels over a lull in conversation.

“Oh uh--” he glanced down at the bag. “I might make something when I get home if I have enough energy.”

“You better. Or I’ll be forced to come over again. Pretzels aren’t dinner.”

“Oh, I see,” Eddie grinned. “Then you can come over and I can make a fool of myself again.”

“It’s okay, I’ll do it too. It’ll balance everything out,” you offered, placing the hot plate on your tray.

“Oh, well there we go. Long as we’re both fools, then it should be okay,” he agreed with feigned seriousness to your proposal then let his smile curl up his lips again.

“Of course,” you matched his endearing expression. “We’re always fools.”

“Always fools…” he tested aloud while leaning back to teeter the metal foldout chair back and forth.

“I concur, Critter.”

“They’re awfully chummy, hm?” Sandy whispered to Ron as she watched you two interact while cleaning up for the night.

“Yeah. I hate it,” Ron grumbled out, scrubbing at a stain. “He better not scare her off. She’s a good waitress.”

“Don’t be like that,” Sandy sighed, nudging her hip into his. “I think it’s sweet. And he’s a good kid, I don’t see him hurting her — let alone enough to cost us an employee.”

“So, we’re definitely keeping her ‘round?”

“Yes, we settled on that this morning — would you quit avoiding the topic?” She urged and Ron groaned as he stretched his back.

“It’s alright, I guess. Jus’ don’t want any drama around here. Too old for it.”

“So, I didn’t scare you off?” Eddie asked as you cleaned off tables together.

“Scare me off?” you repeated, glancing over at him. “Why’d you say that?”

Eddie eyed you through his lashes then looked back down at the same spot he’s wiped down probably six times now.

“Well, you brought up coming over again,” he let out a soft chuckle. “So, I’m guessing I wasn’t that much of an idiot on Wednesday?”

“Oh psh — please,” you laughed it off, standing up straighter after swiping the rag over the tabletop one more time. “If anything, I was being stupid.”

“Oh, I wasn’t saying you weren’t being stupid,” Eddie joked with that obnoxiously gorgeous grin, finally separating from that same table he kept cleaning. He sauntered over to you, his amusement and proximity warming you as he looked down at you. “Just that I was also stupid.”

“I’d say you were especially stupid, but I was trying to be nice,” you shot back in a dulcet tone, grinning up at him.

“Be nice?” Eddie repeated with a huff of disbelief, grinning when that earned him a jab to his side. “Gone soft on me, Critter? Not the same girl that’ll throw a remote at my head?”

“I only did that if you were particularly annoying while I was trying to watch TV,” you laughed, nudging his chest to just barely make him stumble back. Not that it discouraged that man who only smiled brighter.

“Well then, I guess I have an excuse for being such an idiot all the time. You really knocked something loose all those times you hit me with that remote.”

“Sure, it was me that knocked something loose,” you teased in a giggle, making your way over to the last couple of tables. Your laughter only builds up at the face he gives you — both playfully hurt and encouraged to get you back.

Within seconds you noticed the way he started to twist up his rag, and you were squealing and rushing away from him. Eddie chased after you and whipped at you with the towel whenever he got the chance, occasionally jamming his hip into a table or a chair with a breathy “Oof.” Amongst your squeaks of empty fear, you were still cackling and tried to get him back with your own towel.

“Children!” Ron suddenly announced, and you two slowed down to a stop — still breathless and giggly. “I’m old and would like to go to sleep. Maybe finish cleaning before flirting?”

Sandy gave him a look that could kill for that, then followed Eddie’s example and whipped at his behind with a rag.

Both of your faces flushed at the accusation, but thankfully weren’t forced to sit with the embarrassment of being called out by Ron. Instead, all your attention went to cackling over Ron’s tired reaction to his wife snapping a towel at his ass.

He looked genuinely angry for a moment, and then he was clearing his throat and wiping the bar cleaner off his hands and twisting up his own towel.

“Nope — no — Ron,” Sandy started with a warning tone, but she was already laughing, slowly backing away.

“Gotta play fair,” Ron pointed out and whipped at her thigh. That was enough to send Sandy squealing and Ron chased after her to the back room while the two of you leaned into your laughter.

You’d do anything for a love like that.

“Still not a fan of pretzels for dinner?” Eddie chanced a glance over at you with a lazy, half grin as he toyed with his keys and walked you over to your car.

“Definitely not a fan of pretzels for dinner,” you answered, laughing under your breath and nudging his hip with your own.

“It’s a shame cause y’know,” Eddie yawned dramatically as he stretched out his arms and then flopped into the side of your car. “I’m real tired. If someone doesn’t follow through with their offer, that’s for sure all I’ll be having.”

You tilted your head, feeling that post-customer service ache to your cheeks as you fought the urge to smile at this absolute idiot leaning against your car. His elbow was propped up on the roof, his fist supporting his head and squishing his cheek.

“I don’t know if I have the energy to cook right now,” you sighed, doing your best to match his drama. “But you know what?”

“What, Critter?” He hummed, shoving himself away from the car to move a few stray hairs from your face and in that moment, you might as well have melted into the cracked and sun-bleached pavement. “I’m invested. Do go on.”

“I can buy us fast food,” you whispered to provide a surreptitious air to burgers and fries. Screw it. You’ve been good about eating real food. Maybe it was time to associate these meals with something positive for once. Whatever excused your addiction to excessive oil and salt.

“Ah, much better than pretzels,” he laughed, shoving one of his hands into his jacket pocket. “I’d be honored.”

“Just like old times,” him being closer to you to move some hair out of your face encouraged you to toy with one of the pins on his coat. A soft breeze swirled through the parking lot, and you were both reminded of how stuffy and smoke-filled work had been as you breathed the fresh air in. You caught the scent of a distant bonfire, but it was nothing like the cloud of tobacco back in The Hideout. The chill of the air combined with the musk of a faraway fire spoke of Fall, sweetening your already pleasant mood.

“Remember that time we got large pizzas for both of us on movie night?”

“Yeah,” Eddie let out a soft laugh. “You threw up on the carpet.”

“Yeah, and you got in trouble for using your dad’s credit card,” you add a small giggle of your own, just for your heart to sink at the shift in his expression. You shuffled in your spot.

“Sorry… I probably shouldn’t… I shouldn’t keep bringing him up,” you muttered, dropping your hand away from his W.A.S.P. pin.

“No — no, no it’s okay really,” Eddie was quick to reassure you, but your mood was still steadily spoiling and dragging the pit of your stomach down with it at even a glimpse of him being bothered by you. Upset, angry, annoyed, fed up — whatever it was. You were certainly paying the cost of your penchant for nostalgia, and even the aroma of an early October night couldn’t save you.

“I like talking about when we were kids,” he added in a hushed tone that eased your spiral a touch. You glanced up at him through your lashes. “Really. I do. Makes me feel… ah, I don’t know.”

He admitted that last comment with a huff. It was filtered through amusement over his inability to speak before he rolled his lower lip inward in thought. Both of his hands were shoved in his pockets now and he swayed in his spot while kicking a piece of gravel forward. He finally released his lower lip again which was left with a slight sheen to it now, and he settled on a shrug of defeat. He couldn’t think of what he wanted to say.

You stared at him, this impromptu moment of softness burning through you in a way you weren’t expecting. Just as he couldn’t understand exactly why he enjoyed discussing his childhood as long as it was with you — you couldn’t understand the sudden pang of nausea that came from hanging onto his words and just to drop down over a noncommittal shrug. Your anxiety barreled into you in a sudden flash, leaving you somewhere in between the pain and the comfort of clinging to the past with him.

“Makes me feel cared about, I guess. Especially since we haven’t been friends in a while,” he finally concluded. “You don’t have to remember any of that stuff, but you do… it’s nice.”

“We’re always friends,” you insisted with a small smile, doing your best to not let everything fall apart over that once brief change of expression especially since things were looking up again.

“Yeahhh, you’re alright…,” Eddie murmured. “I guess I’ll keep you.”

“Oh, how generous of you,” you snort, attempting to move him to the side so you can get to your car, just for him to reach out a hand to settle on your upper arm. He gently urged you to turn around as he pushed himself off your car again.

“C’mon, I’ll drive. I don’t trust that thing,” Eddie insisted as he kept a careful hold on your elbow while guiding you towards his van.

“What?” you question, looking back at your lonely car. “I’ve had her forever, she’s perfectly safe… I can’t just leave her here.”

“Your brake pads are shit.”

“What?” you ask again with a slight pout and furrowed brows.

“When you visited me the other day,” he started with a light laugh to buffer his confession. “Your car sounded like it was screaming when you were parking.”

You reached his van that had aged gracefully over the years with a mechanic at its beck and call. Eddie unlocked the passenger side door and held it open for you, but you couldn’t stop looking at your car.

“She’s just tired s’all,” you frown, feeling guilty over abandoning an inanimate object no matter how silly it felt.

“She’s just gonna kill you if you don’t replace your brake pads s’all,” Eddie leaned into you with his mocking whisper. Your sad glance up at him is enough to make his playful expression falter. His heavy and dramatic exhale already pulls a smile back onto your face, knowing he was caving in some way or another.

“I’ll bring ‘er to Thach’s and replace them for you,”

“Thank you, Loogie,” you swooned, and he rolled his eyes over your excessively cooing tone.

You were lucky to have favoritism on your side.

“Give it to me straight, doc. Will she make it?”

Eddie glanced over at you with a faux glare.

“How many times are you going to ask me that?”

“I dunno, how many times are you going to squint at me instead of answering?”

“You know I’m doing this for free right? After hours? After already working my second job all night?”

“Ooo, you sound like such an adult,” you squeeze your shoulders up to your ears with a grin, a brown bag stocked with artery-clogging goodness on your lap. He shook his head at you, looking away again to hide his poorly masked amusement. He could say all he wanted about doing this for free, but you could still give him a hard time. He was getting paid whether he wanted it or not. Even if he didn't accept it from you personally, you'd at least leave cash at the front desk and ask the nice receptionist to give it to him.

“Alright, c’mere,” he waved you over eventually. You perked up, moving out of the hard plastic chair in the garage where you left the fast food in your place. “And can you bring that display over? On the table?”

Nodding, you snatched it on your way over to Eddie and kneel beside him.

“Okay so,” he started off with a sigh. Not a great sign.

“Best case scenario, your brake pads look like this,” a greasy index finger points to one of the pads on display before moving to the one next to it. “This is how they’d look with a more moderate amount of wear to them – not great and you'll want to replace them, and then this is how they look when you need to get them replaced ASAP.”

“And this is your brain on drugs,” you chimed in with the theme, before shrinking under the look he gave you.

“Sorry,” you murmured, even though he broke and smiled over your bad joke.

You returned to observing the gradual decline in buffers on the display and shrug a bit.

“Okay, so what about Sherry?”

Eddie groaned as he leaned back to grab the discarded piece of metal and held it up to show you. It looked like a flat, grimy cracker in comparison to the examples on the display.

“They’re practically just the backing plates at this point, I don’t know how you’re not dead,” the piece clinked against the cement floor when he dropped it back down. “How long have they been squealing?”

Eddie’s brow furrowed and he became visibly pained by the way you had to think about it. It wasn’t coming from a patronizing, “how can you be so dumb” kind of place, but rather it stemmed from the anxiety of knowing you were driving around like this.

“I dunno… I noticed a while ago, so I just played my music louder,” you shrugged, and Eddie snorted amidst his distress. He sat up more to lean his back on Sherry. “But then I had to start stomping on the brakes way before I usually would to stop in time.”

“Yeah, that’s generally not a great sign,” he snickered as you started to.

“I’m so sorry, Sherry…” you frowned despite your previous giggling, raising a hand to caress one of her doors. Eddie lifted himself up off the ground with a grunt, heading over to a sink to wash his hands. You crane your neck to follow him, dropping your hand down from your car and start playing with the creeper, rolling it back and forth.

“So, she’ll get some new brake pads and she’ll be as good as new?”

“Well, I don’t want to just replace those, I’ll check out the whole braking system,” Eddie turned to face you completely, wiping the remaining water and suds off his hands. He grabbed the bag you left on the seat and made his way back to you.

“How’d you learn all this stuff?” you asked, thanking him as he handed you your burger before taking a monstrous bite out of his own.

“Uh, my uncle taught me,” he said around his food, sucking a bit of ketchup off the side of his thumb. You noticed the sad glance down to the floor, so you backed off. You didn’t need another moment like earlier when you brought up his dad again.

“I just can’t get over the fact that you’re a grown up…” you murmured to yourself, looking down at your meal. Eddie eyed you as he kept chomping away at his food. The horrid sound that you’ve always despised motivated you to look up at him again, and laughter bloomed from your chest at the sight of the mess around his mouth. His chewing slowed as he blinked his big eyes at you. Gulp.

“What? What’s so funny?”

“You still eat like an obnoxious kid,” you teased, kicking a foot out to nudge him and pull multiple napkins out of the bag for him.

He simply shrugged in response with a cheeky grin, accepting the napkins that he unceremoniously smeared over his lips.

“Hey, you’re the one who wanted to be here,” he raised his hands up in defense now, chuckling to himself.

“Yeah, I am…” you murmured, leaning your head back against Sherry as a fond smile formed on your lips while you watched him start to dig through the bag for any stray fries to add to his container. He shoved most of them right into his mouth before glancing at you again.

“What?”

“Nothing… just happy to have my best friend back,” you murmured, and he silently melted at the sincerity. God, did he feel lucky for once.

You take a beat before outstretching your arm to present him with your downturned hand with just your pinky out. Eddie recognized the old gesture and wiped his hand on his pants, despite the napkins at his disposal, before reaching his own hand out. Interlocking pinkies was of course typical of some childish pact which the two of you did plenty of times as kids, but sometimes you sought this out simply for a moment of comfort. It made you feel held and even as kids, Eddie had the emotional maturity to understand how lonely you felt because of your family. So, when you needed someone to hold your pinky, he was there. The only difference was now his pinky was closer to the width of your thumb and nearly swallowed your pinky whole when he wrapped it around yours. Just another adjustment to Eddie being an adult, which left an unlaughed snicker in your chest at the realization, but it comforted you all the same.

And this night in a dingy old garage after a long shift was easily the best night you’d had in years.

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heyhilana · 2 years ago

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Hi. I don't know if your taking requests atm but I love your work and was wondering if I could request. Here me out - javier pena x reader. Enemies to lovers trope. Something like they work together, have a fight and wake up in each others bodies the next day. They try to embarrass each other and make things worse. Deep down they both like each other but are so stubborn they don't want to admit their feelings for one another but eventually they do and change back to normal. Sorry if that's confusing. If you can't write it that's all good :) just thought I'd ask. Thanks again.

Hi lovely 😊 Thank you for your request, and I’m sorry that this took me a little while to get to as I've been a little busy. I love the idea, and I tweaked it slightly as I didn’t know exactly what you meant when you said change back to normal so I hope that’s okay! Also, I would’ve made this strictly hate fuck but Javi...he’s just too tender in his scenes to do a hate fuck fully LMAO like we all know that infamous scene where he pulls that girl’s hair and brings her flush to him so my point stands. But, hugs and love and as always, drink water. 💚

Summary: Two unlikely and rather animosity filled partners could accurately describe you and Javi. But after a shitshow of a meeting with the bosses, tensions are pulling at the strings that create a crescendo that’s undeniable in a random office you decide to walk into. But it’s the aftermath from the next day that threatens everything of detachment and realization.

A/N: Hi, lovelies! Just to remind you all, requests are open; if and when I need to close them, I will update my masterlist to say they are closed. There is more in my masterlist about who and what I’ll write about for notes. But beyond that, this was super fun for me to write, and I got to rechallenge myself. Also, thank you so much for 1k followers! I never thought I would reach that with my inconsistency, but it means the world to me that you guys enjoy my works and you want to support me :)) But for now, I hope you enjoy reading this! :)

Pairing: Javier Peña x !f reader (enemies/coworkers to lovers)

Warnings: (What can I say? I love a little spice) Hair pulling, spanking, rough grips, orgasm denial, foul language, f and m oral receiving, cum shot on ass, unprotected because this was unexpected hate fuck (but wrap it up), a little bit of degrading, but that's all I can label.

Word Count: 6.1k (You know what it be LMAO)

“You’re an asshole.” You spat, walking out of the boardroom and turning sharply on your heel down the hall.

Asshole was an understatement. Infuriating, jerk, jackass, arrogant, intolerable, the list could go on. Javier Peña, somehow your new partner when you were sent down here, and you would’ve chosen anyone else over him. If it meant peaceful, level-headed conversations, you would’ve even taken the secretary to be your partner. Being at his throat on an everyday basis was draining, lighting fires in you every time he got under your skin.

“I could say the same about you.” Catching up to you and jaw tightening, his presence was something you wanted to shake, but you couldn’t.

“You do it every day.” A dry laugh echoed from you as you walked into the empty office, turning on the lights.

“That’s because you give me a reason to.” You half sat on the desk as he leaned against it in the doorway. How could he be so calm while your blood was boiling, the tipping mark fading into the distance.

“Oh I give you a reason when you get your ass handed to you most days.” You hissed, venom laced in your tone as you folded your arms.

“Did we go to the same meeting because you got your ass handed to you as well in there.” You wanted to forget it all. Crosby and Noonan taking turns tearing into you both over negligence and overall stupidity. A waste of 15 minutes when you could’ve been home, far away from him, since he walked further into the room.

“That’s because your fuck-up got us here.” You tried to keep your voice down as you heard your superiors leaving the building. When you both heard the elevator door open and close, you knew there was no one else there besides you two.

“My fuck-up? It was you who didn’t trust my informant.”

“Because she lies more than she tells the truth! And why would I trust any girl who you’ve been fucking more than talking to.” He narrowed his eyes at you and walked closer, this being the closest you could tolerate since you could feel something brewing in you that you couldn’t place your finger on.

“What I do is my business. I don’t let it cloud my judgment.” He looked down at you, and you kept eye contact, the glare intensifying as you cocked your head slightly.

“You sure about that?”

“What the fuck are you implying since I’m not the one who slept my way up here.” A low blow. Rumors had traveled with you the moment you arrived. The only woman who was qualified for the job, every man was against you for supposedly taking their spot when they didn’t earn it. You worked just like everyone else did, and he was only doing it to get under your skin.

“Don’t you fucking believe that I slept my way up here when you sleep your way into information that leads to fuckups.” Deflection at its finest with him, but you weren’t having it. You were going to leave, but he closed that gap between you, his legs right on yours, and you sat more on the desk. His hands were on the desk, and he was dangerously close to you, your heart pounding out of anger and curiosity about what he would do.

“I don’t let a fuck get in the way of my job. You may be new here, but this is how it goes.” His eyes had never looked so dark before, and you were unsure of why you couldn’t break eye contact with him. Infuriating, yet the pool of desire had grown significantly when you moved your legs.

“You know what? Fuck you.” You spat at him. You could tell he was taken aback by your boldness, but he remained firm where he stood.

“Fuck you.” He enunciated those words, but when you saw the flicker down to your lips ever so slightly, you felt that small stoke of the flame reach new heights.

That first brush on your lips that turned into heady, almost feral kisses was nothing that you could expect. How did he manage to have impossibly soft lips, the odd taste of whiskey that made you drunk over him. The nibble on your bottom lip, the groan that did nothing to quell your desire except intensify it. How his hands rose up your arms to pull off your suit jacket, and his fingertips brushed your exposed collarbone. You helped him with taking off the jacket, discarding it on the desk, and kicking off your heels. He pulled off his jacket and threw it somewhere as you were unbuttoning his shirt as fast as you could.

“Someone’s excited,” He mumbled against your lips, unbuttoning the last button for you and taking it off. “This what you wanted?”

“Don’t let that ego of yours get any bigger,” You mumbled back, and he nibbled on your lip in retaliation. “You’re gonna tease me now?” You pulled back to pull off your blouse, moving it on the table again before you went to unclasp your bra in the front. He stopped you, doing it himself and watching your breasts fall, which made him groan.

“You’re the one teasing me.” He countered before his lips were back on yours with more ferocity that you didn’t think was possible. His hands traveled to your breasts, and yours went up and down his body, feeling him and finally understanding why those women would throw themselves at him. Why he was so confident because he felt amazing. Sure, his arrogance got under your skin, but now you wanted him skin-to-skin with you. You moaned in his mouth when he was playing with your nipples, to which he smiled against your lips. Damn him and all the reactions he could get out of you. Fuck him, you repeated in your head, but your body was begging for him to explore you. He left your lips and kissed down your jaw and to your throat, leaving chaste kisses until that one made you whine. The laugh that followed left you embarrassed and more turned on than you wanted to admit.

“I knew you were a little noisy but whining? Something finally coming out of that mouth of yours that I like.” With that glint in his eye from the window, you could see that he enjoyed all of it. Finally having you after months of being at your throat.

“Shut up already.” You feigned annoyance, but he saw right through you.

“Be careful what you ask for.” You couldn’t come up with a retort once he put his mouth on your nipple, his tongue twirling around it, sucking, flicking it. His other hand massaged your other breast, and you instinctively opened your legs more to let him slide in between you. Even with not being a fan of nipple sucking, he made it hot. You looked down at him and saw he was looking at you, eyes a little low, but his gaze never wavering. You put your hand in his hair and tangled in it, gripping a little when he sucked harder.

“Please don’t stop,” You whined further, grinding on the desk to get some friction. He shifted his mouth to your other breast to give it the attention it deserved, and his hands traveled down to your pants, unbuttoning them without a second thought. He pulled at the hem of them, you moved your hand out of his hair, and put your feet back on the floor to get out of them with him stopping with your breasts to catch his breath. He pulled your pants and panties down for you and kissed your hips, then your thighs, your calves, and when you kicked your pants off he put you back on the desk. You leaned back a little as he put your legs on his shoulders, kneeling before you. You gripped the desk for balance as he got close to your dripping pussy, that smile on his face something that would be imprinted in your mind for a lifetime.

“You sure you hate me?” Ever the one to still push your buttons, you rolled your eyes.

“I can’t fucking stand you.” Those little white lies that you both knew were meaningless as he put two fingers right near your clit and dragged it down on the slit, gathering up your slick in one go.

“You sure about that because she’s telling me otherwise.” He held up his fingers and, just like that, coated with your desire for him that you couldn’t deny without feeling foolish.

“Fuck me.” Double meaning as you knew you were in for it and you needed him to fuck you, he kissed your clit and licked gently, making you gasp.

“Gladly.” Flattening his tongue to lick up your hole, the slit, up to your clit, then sucking your clit, and you were gone. You didn’t know how loud you could get until now, hands tangled in his hair as he switched from sucking to tasting your slick near your hole, the wave of pleasure riding through your body with each passing moment. But when those same two fingers brushed at your hole, the small push before fully slotting them inside you, you forgot how good fingering could be. Curling at your spot, the pace that matched with each suck, the moans that vibrated against your clit. You were sure if there was anyone else in the building on a different floor, they would’ve heard you. But all those rumors surrounding your insufferable partner were true.

“So fucking sweet,” He moved his head up to say that and look at you, that look on your face of pure ecstasy was something he never wanted to forget. Biting your lip, eyes a little low, slightly flushed cheeks, and then trailing down your body to see the thin layer of perspiration glowing on your skin, he felt his dick twitch in his pants from that.

“J-Javi, please I-” The all too familiar feeling in your stomach, the intensity rising as he fingered you a little faster, made you clench around his fingers.

“Yeah? You gonna cum on my fingers and make a mess? Déjandome usar tu coño así.” He dove back down to your clit to suck and lick just as he did before. You gripped his hair, and when he curled at that spot, you inhaled a sharp breath and let go, all the sounds you were holding back flowing out and the shutters washing over you. Riding you through it, he slowed his actions just as you stopped shaking, giving your clit a final kiss, and licking at your hole to make you jump. He then brought his fingers to his mouth and got up to show you him tasting it, the act making you clench around nothing when he pulled them out, and they were clean.

“Dulce, mami,” He mumbled before he kissed you, pulling down his pants hastily. You moved your hand down his stomach and palmed him in his boxers, surprised at his size. Even in his tight clothes, you never imagined it to feel this good, this thick. The stretch would be nothing like you imagined, making you pull away from him to get on your knees.

You pulled down his boxers and watched his dick spring up. The rosy red tip with precum leaking, the slight curve, the thickness, it was a sight for sore eyes. You looked up at him and licked your lips before kissing the tip and licking the precum to see him groan and grip the desk. You sucked the tip just enough to tease, making his jaw tighten. You enjoyed the stretch on your lips and jaw as you reached closer to the base. His hand was right at the back of your head, guiding you down nice and slow, coaxing you to take it.

“You can do it, baby. Take every inch of me.” That little praise made you go down to the base, lips touching that soft patch of hair before pulling away, spit dribbling at your lip. You spat in your hand and brought it to the tip, stroking slowly but squeezing just enough to make him hiss. He fucked himself into your tight grip, and you began to move your hand from tip to base, enjoying the way he opened up your grip with how thick he was. You sucked the tip and decided to move your hand down to his thigh to hold him in place to take him to the back of your throat.

“You feel so fucking good. Should’ve known with all that talking you do I should’ve stuffed your mouth.” His knuckles were almost white with how he gripped the desk, and you popped your lips off the tip to glare at him.

“God, you’re so infuriating.” He had a talent for getting under your skin even when you were on your knees for him.

“You’re so much worse.”

“Is this worse?” You put your lips back on the tip and looked up at him.

“N-no.” A smirk was lightly tugging at your lips when you pulled off him again.

“Aw, you’re stuttering.”

“You were doing it first,” Instead of arguing, you took him whole in one go to make him suck in a sharp breath. You kept going just like that, from tip to base taking him until you had to catch your breath and stroke the tip, flicking your wrist a little before going back down to do it again. It kept going like that, Javi was blown away at how long you wanted his shaft down your throat. But something else lingered, and he couldn’t quite put his finger on it.

You could tell he was getting close when a slight whimper escaped his lips. So low that you almost thought it was a figment of your imagination, but it happened again. The sound lit something in you, and you had to get it again, and again, and again because with how much you loved those groans, to hear him have such desperation in his voice, so much ecstasy at your ministrations, it was a high that you never wanted to get off of.

“Right there, baby. Keep going for me, please.” The strain in his voice was evident, and somehow the curve in your mouth grew. There were two thoughts buzzing through your head, surprisingly. To swallow him whole and let him cum, or to deny? Sure, the desire was close to winning, but he had to pay after the stunt he pulled. So, you stopped everything.

“What the fuck was that?” The fire in his eyes elicited a smirk from you.

“You gotta fuck me first if you want to cum.” Toying with him, he pulled you up and pushed you onto the desk, bending you over while you knew you were getting under his skin.

“Oh I’ll fuck you.” Roughly, he pushed inside you, the sheer size making you yelp as he fucked you. Hands gripped tightly on your hips, the grunts that fell from his lips, and knowing that he was taking you just as he knew you would.

“You think it's funny to tease me, don’t you?” He smacked your ass as he thrusted inside you.

“I-I do.” He smacked your ass again, making you bite your lip and hold back your moans.

“Oh, you like the pain,” He smacked your ass three times in a row, and you were sure that it made your ass burn bright red as each sting brought more pain and pleasure from the last. “My handprint on your ass right now is perfect. Little fucking slut.” The way those words fell from his lips would normally make you angry, but it didn’t do anything but make you clench around him harder.

“F-Fuck you!” You stuttered out, pleasure blinding you as you started to meet his thrusts halfway.

“F-Fuck you too.” He pulled you by your hair, and the glimpse you got of light sweat dripping down his face, head full of hair a mess, gritting words through his teeth was breathtaking. He moved your head back down and let go of your hair, resting his hand back on your hip.

You whined a little, feeling your orgasm approach quickly. From how he stretched you out and brushed up against your pleasure spot, you knew it would come quicker than you could anticipate. You wanted to cum without him noticing, but with the pulsing you did all around his shaft, he knew that you were trying to play it off.

“Feels like you want to cum,” He trailed off as he moved one of his hands down to your clit, rubbing tight and fast circles enough to make you jolt up.

“Yes, I need to cum.” You rasped out, barely making a coherent thought in your head. He fucked you through it just until you were about to cum, even denying himself an orgasm before he pulled out, making you turn your head to look at him.

“You thought I would let you cum? So naïve.” He laughed while you were fuming. Why did you think he would let you cum twice after the stunt you pulled? And, more importantly, why were you in this position?

“I fucking hate you.” You gritted through your teeth, getting ready to move away and get dressed, but he stopped you, gripping your hip with one hand to keep you in place.

“I hate you so much more.” He pushed back inside you, and you were relieved to feel him again, even with your mind telling you that he was the enemy. An enemy who could play with your body while simultaneously getting under your skin, bringing you to ecstasy faster than any man could.

But for him, hearing you loosen up on him, the regular insults transforming into breathless moans as your body begging for him changed something in him. A hate fuck that he was used to, getting it out of the way before he would go home to drink and go to sleep. But this? No, he was transfixed on giving you more than he normally would, even if you were everything that he couldn’t stand.

Suddenly, a twitch was felt right up on your spot as your intense pulses increasing with each second. His hand went back down to your clit to rub faster circles, and he bent down just enough to get a little closer to your ear.

“You gonna cum? Use that pretty mouth of yours and scream my name.” Deep, a little raspy even as he encouraged you to cum, you let go and squeezed all around him as you came, much to his pleasure as he tried to ride it out for you. Just as he couldn’t hold it anymore, he pulled out in a haste to cum on your ass. Heavy breaths, body shaking, mind empty, you both were spent. Drunk off the other's touch and how you both felt, you knew you did something that would cause issues in the morning. He moved off to grab a tissue from the desk, wiping off your other ass cheek that he came on and admiring the light handprint on your ass.

“That’s gonna be pretty in the morning.” He commented as he got up. You rolled your eyes and grabbed your clothes which were all over the place, putting them on quickly.

“How does everything that comes out of your mouth annoy me?” You put your blouse back on and looked at him as he put his shirt back on.

“Just before you were enjoying my words.” Your face burned after he spoke, turning your head while you pulled on your panties and then pants.

“That doesn’t count,” You trailed off, voice not as strong as usual given that you knew you were lying.

“Right,” He pulled on his pants, walking over to you to tilt your head up when he finished. “I can go for round 2 at your place.” Your eyes lit up at those words, and you smirked.

“Follow me home then.”

The Colombian sun shined through your bedroom window, cascading a shadow on your bed as you stirred in your sleep. The window was open, making your room a little bit rise in temperature by noon, and you could faintly hear the cars driving down the street. The sheets tangled, limbs as well, an arm lazily wrapped around your waist, you were close to thinking that you were still dreaming. Your back felt warm, and there was a soft rumble hitting your upper back with each breath he took. Finally, you opened your eyes, seeing that the sun was higher in the sky, which you were not used to seeing so much in your apartment. You turned to face Javi, seeing that he was fast asleep, snoring softly as he was undisturbed by your shift in bed.

Somehow, he looks softer than you’ve ever seen him. The sheet rested just above his hip bone, trailing up, you could see his tan skin, the soft expanse of his stomach, his chest, his collarbone, his neck, up to his face. That damned face of his. 12 hours ago, and you couldn’t stand the sight of him, yet he was tangled in your bed, snoring softly. If you didn’t remember that he was the enemy still, you would’ve stared at him until you couldn’t anymore, but when you turned over to finally look at your clock, and it read 8:00 am, you were fucked.

“Shit. I’m late.” You sprung out of bed to close your window. Javi stirred as he rubbed his eyes.

“What time is it?”

“8:00 am. We have to meet Noonan by 8:30.” You rushed it out as you tried to find clean clothes, cursing yourself for not getting up. That alarm you had to set faded into the distance when you brought him to your bed last night. The way his lips felt on your neck made all your thoughts melt away as you let him take you once more.

“Fuck, you’re right.” He got out of bed fast, trying to find his clothes that were discarded in your room. It didn’t take much last night to help him undress, although it was slower, less hasty. The air felt different the second go around, with no pesky insults to throw the other off the scent of surface-level tension, culminating into something more. It was just you and him, using every inch of the bed for as long as you could keep your eyes open. You both put your clothes on and were headed for the door when you turned to face him, your face burning at how this would play out.

“What are we going to tell Noonan?” You asked, and his incredulous look made you sink further into embarrassment.

“What do you mean what do we tell her?”

“She’s going to ask why we’re both late, so we need an excuse.” Perhaps you were overthinking it, trying to avoid the other question that was burning in your head worse than a typical hangover.

“Just act how you normally act and I’ll do the same. Shouldn’t be too hard since this was just a one-time thing.” He brushed it off and walked ahead of you, and it stung in your heart more than his usual banter with you. Nothing was what he thought. Nothing to him when it meant everything to you when he was coaxing you into new highs for him, to unwind for him and let him get to the deepest parts of you. Nothing. Nothing for him, and it was nothing for you as you walked out the door.

“Got it.” The hardness in your voice surprised him when you didn’t catch his eyes again. You were the same as you were yesterday, stoic and angry as he knew you to be most of the time. Yet he realized he liked it more the way you were last night and how he was much softer with you. To have it all again would be nice, but those dreams of tomorrow were not promised in the lives you both lived.

A traffic-filled drive later, you and Javi were in the elevator waiting to see Noonan. You both look disheveled, even with fixing yourself in the car as you drove, but it would still get some comments from her that you didn’t need. The elevator dinged, and the doors opened, and you both walked there as fast as you could, seeing that Noonan’s door was ajar. You walked in first, and Javi followed. and Noonan looked just the same as last night, making you wish you didn’t have to see her today.

“You both look like you went through a pigsty.” She pushed her papers to the side and darted her eyes between you both.

“Shower’s broken.” You made up, and you could see Noonan was fighting to roll her eyes at you.

“Well get it fixed.”

“Will do.” It was best to speak less around her, and when her attention was redirected to Javi, you were in the clear.

“What’s your excuse Peña? Couldn’t bother to iron?” Javi had a backup outfit in his car, yet it was wrinkled, and you could only imagine why that was the case.

“The iron broke yesterday. Didn’t have time to buy another one.” She didn’t buy it at all, and if you weren’t still pissed from earlier, you would’ve fought back a laugh.

“You have time to fuck up everything else but not get ready. Your priorities are wonderful,” You had to stifle a laugh there, or else she would chew you in again. “Just get your shit done and try to fix yourselves up.”

“Understood.” You both spoke in unison.

“And that meeting yesterday was a disaster. I’ve never had partners go against each other like that to save their ass.”

“With all due respect, Y/L/N went out on a limb and I didn’t have much of a choice. She wouldn’t trust my informant even after she met her.” You turned your head to look at him, the urge to slap him making you ball your hand into a fist.

“You seem to make a lot of choices for yourself without much thought, Peña. Don’t act like you have reservations now.”

“Peña’s informant has lied multiple times now, only with some of her intel being useful. I didn’t trust her with this because it could’ve led us to a death trap and he keeps going to her anyways. I had to do what made sense.” The damage control was useless once more, as you could see the irritation in her eyes.

“What would’ve made sense was to follow protocol. You went completely off the rails and were going to put yourself in danger without telling anyone. For that I should send you back to the States.”

“I’m sorry about what I did. It won’t happen it again.” Javi didn’t say anything, and you presumed it was that she wouldn’t believe he was sorry anyways.

“You’re right, it won’t. Figure out how to work together or I’ll put you both on desk duty permanently somewhere else. Now go take care of that paperwork Juarez left on your desks.”

“Yes ma’am.” You both walked out, reminiscent of the night before as you were fuming again. You walked straight to your desk and saw the stacks of files that were as tall as you are right in the middle. Javi’s was a little bit larger, and you wished someone else could help. You sat down and began to sort through them, ignoring the stare he was giving you.

“Your hair looks like it got tangled in a fan.” You scoffed, his first words to you being an insult like always.

“Could say the same for you. You could go undercover as a shaggy dog.”

“You seemed to like it last night.”

“That was a mistake.” You gritted through your teeth. You didn’t look, but you could feel the air shift between you two.

“You’re right. I’m glad we’re on the same page.” He was stoic, maybe a little angry, even when he didn’t have the right to be. After all, it was his idea to treat it as such.

“I’m just following what you said this morning. Nothing remotely special about what happened.” While you were talking to him, deep down, you were reassuring yourself that this was all it was as you read through the files and tried to finish them off. Distractions from how your body shivered from the memories of last night, how he said those sweet little nothings that would echo in your mind longer than they should.

“Something’s finally useful in that head of yours.”

“I’m surprised you have thoughts at all. You only seem to think when it’s about saving your ass.” You took a quick glance and saw he was fuming and doing a terrible job of hiding it.

“I missed it when you weren’t speaking.” He muttered, finishing a file and sliding it over in haste.

“And I can’t wait to get away from you.” You replied, busying yourself with files as you could feel the pang in your heart grow with each passing moment. You blinked away your tears as you thought about last night, returning you to a better place.

Brushing your hair out of your face, the gentle kiss on your forehead. Sweet nothings as he went slow. Completely drunk off of both times, but the second one made you squeeze his hand as he thrusted into you. Again, and again, and again.

Nightfall came, and you were finished with your files. Javi had finished 20 minutes before you did, leaving without saying goodnight. You turned off the light at your desk and grabbed your things, passing by the office for a moment which made you stop in your tracks. Nearly 24 hours ago, he had you bent over in there and then, shortly after, gave you a much tender, softer side of him that you couldn’t stop thinking about. Now, it was as if nothing happened when you wanted to talk about it. Hell, you wanted it to happen again, and again, and again. He made your existence hell, but when you thought about things as you walked into the office, you thought about who he really was. His efforts were unconventional, but he had to get his hands dirty after doing this for a long time. And even with how he pushed back on your efforts, he had reason, as did you. Maybe you had him pegged wrong, but you were going to stick to what you said before. It was nothing, despite it making you feel everything.

You went to the elevator and hit the garage level, fighting back tears as they threatened to fall before you got in the car. What were you feeling over one night? Was the first time what tipped you over the edge, or was it the second time? That damned second time shouldn’t have happened. But you didn’t want to regret it, not when it replayed in your head.

“That’s it. Take it all for me.”

“You’re doing so good, baby.”

"Tomándome tan bien."

And a little phrase that went over your head.

“Eres mía.”

Before you knew it, the elevator dinged, and you reached the garage level. You walked out and saw that Javi was there on the left waiting for you.

“I thought you left 20 minutes ago.” You asked, but you didn’t look at him. Not when your eyes were still a little glassy and you didn’t want to be that vulnerable.

“I was, but I waited so I could tail you on the way home.” You fought the urge to roll your eyes. Now he cares. Now he wants to be nice.

“I’m good, Javi. I can take care of myself alright? I have my gun and my knife so there’s no need to worry.” You were beginning to walk off but he caught your wrist and pulled you back.

“There’s sicarios out there. I can’t let you go out there like that.” You finally looked at him and saw his eyes were a little glassy too. Surely you were imagining it. You had to be.

“Why do you care?” Voice trembling, you were letting a wall down with him.

“I…I don’t. I’m just making sure you don’t become the next example for them.” Somehow that beat he took before speaking gave you everything you needed to know.

“You never did this before.”

“I’m not gonna make it a habit.” If he was going to close up, so were you. You took his hand off your wrist and moved back.

“I don’t expect you to. You’re just doing your job I guess.” You regretted asking that question, and your feet were itching to run to your car.

“What do you mean by that?”

“Nothing, Javi. Just go home and leave me be.” Your feet begged to run, but your heart kept you right in place.

“Answer me.”

“I don’t have to. It didn’t mean anything just like none of this means anything.” Tears welled again just as your heart swelled from pain. Why couldn’t you leave? What was seeing him get closer to you, grabbing your hands and interlocking them that made you want more?

“This doesn’t mean anything to you?” He caught your gaze and you couldn’t escape it. You sucked in a breath, savoring it before answering.

“No.”

“You hesitated.” He squeezed your hand and you squeezed back.

“Does it mean anything to you?” You countered.

“Don’t put this on me.” Damn him for calling you out for the reversal.

“You asked.”

“Be honest with me. Did you think about what we did last night at all today?” His voice was softer, the hint of desperation laced in that pulled at your heartstrings.

“Did you?”

“I asked you first.”

“Okay, maybe. Did you?” That maybe held you from admitting it completely, but the glimmer of hope that flashed in his eyes made you realize that it meant something to him.

“All day today. I couldn’t stop.” He was a little breathless, the weight of that finally off his shoulders.

“I thought you didn’t care.” He sighed when you spoke.

“Did you believe me for a second when I said it?”

“I had my doubts but I wasn’t sure. Did you believe me?”

“No. Not then, not now.” He squeezed your hand again, pulling you a little closer. He opened his mouth but closed it just as fast, making you wonder what he wanted to say.

“You’re hesitating on asking me something.” He averted his eyes from you but you caught his gaze again.

“Well if you’re going to dodge the truth I won’t ask.”

“I’ll be honest. I swear.”

“Do you want that to happen again…and more?” The vulnerability in his voice was evident with the pause he took, his voice cracking just enough that you knew you weren’t in this by yourself.

“I do. Do you?”

“Yeah. I do.” That was all you needed to hear before you took the leap. That leap led you to kiss him softly, pouring all those buried feelings into it, knowing that you were finally happy. Happiest with him, even with what would come after. He pulled back but he let go of your hands and put them on your cheeks, rubbing his thumb against them.

“I’m sorry about what I said to you before. I never believed the rumors because you proved yourself. And I’m sorry for what I did earlier with Noonan. You were right about my informant even when I didn’t want to believe it.” Sincerity in his voice and his eyes, you gave him a warm smile that you didn’t know you had in you after all this time being down here.

“It’s okay. And I’m sorry for accusing you of letting things like your informants get in the way of your job. I know we both want the same thing we just have different ways of getting it done.” The smile that was etched onto his face made you smile a little wider, two grinning agents as if they were teens crushing on each other.

“I think we want two things.” You cocked your head to the side as his smile changed into a smirk.

“You sure?” You challenged, and he kissed you again, which was deeper and more passionate. Somehow, you didn’t think you would get enough of his kisses anytime soon.

“Positive.”

“Tail me home then.”

Translations:

Déjandome usar tu coño así - Letting me use your pussy like this.

Dulce - Sweet (you guys should know what mami is LMAO)

Tomándome tan bien - You're taking me so well.

Eres mía - You're mine.

#javier pena smut #javier peña x reader #javier pena fanfiction #javier pena fic #javier peña #javier pena #javier pena x you #javier pena angst #javier pena/reader #narcos #narcos fanfiction #narcos smut #narcos fic #pedropascal #pedro pascal fanfiction #lanawrites #coworkers to lovers #slight enemies to lovers #i say slight because it's not full blown but its there

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night-willows · 4 days ago

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A collection of Kirihara thoughts I had saved in my phone/some I just wrote down

Because I thought maybe I should share them. Tw Kirihara being Kirihara and spoilers for the full game

Madarame x Kirihara

Horrible relationship idea: Madarame x Kirihara. Kirihara is trying to use Madarame to replace his brother and Madarame is trying to use Kirihara to replace Towa. Forgive me I don’t think about Madarame enough to know if he’d actually be likely to use someone else in place of Towa but. I know Kirihara would. Just. Them having a horribly abusive relationship of course but in a way that’s what they both want. Or at least what Kirihara’s been traumatized into thinking he wants. But they both know deep down that they’re each other’s second best, a replacement, they’ll give each other the violence they need that satisfies them on the surface but it will never be the same. And Kirihara is more the type of person who would be comfortable in this situation, whereas Towa is so deeply uncomfortable with the lack of control that he’s desperate to escape. That same lack of control is what Kirihara is looking for I think, he just wants anyone who will abuse and control him like his brother did. I think even the idea of leaving Madarame would trigger him abandonment issues and he’d be Stockholm Syndromed into staying with him far easier than Towa was. Note that I don’t think this is a cute relationship or whatever it’s just a new idea of how to further torment Kirihara lmao.

Thinking about how at his core, Kirihara is driven by a deep loneliness and need for a connection. I think he’s actually struggling a lot with the lack of love and care in his life. But he doesn’t know what genuine love and care feels like, all he knows is how his brother treated him, so that’s what he clings onto desperately. He knows he needs attention, and that’s the only kind of attention he knows, from the only person who’s ever given it to him. He knows he needs someone, but all he does is try to find his brother again or find people to fill his role, like with Towa. Because he’s been left feeling empty and alone without his brother, so maybe if he had him again he’d feel happy. Even when people do care about him, like Rei did, Kirihara doesn’t take the time to appreciate it. He doesn’t know how to let himself be treated kindly, he’s too focused on trying to chase after anyone who’ll hurt him to even realize that’s what he needs. So I’m wondering what it would even take for him to get the love he’s missing in a way that he wouldn’t just internally dismiss it as something he doesn’t need or fully push it away. Like. I want to be nice to him and hug him but I don’t think he’d actually care. I would like to think though that as much as he obviously daydreams about his brother hurting him, he also thinks about him actually treating him lovingly and holding him or something. He rationalizes this with thinking that of course he’d want to be close to his brother, he misses him and he’d give anything just to have him in arms reach again. He’d be happy with anything his brother wanted to do to him, even that. But he doesn’t realize that he’s actually just really touch starved and in his mind the idea of having anyone in his life giving him attention is synonymous with having his brother giving him attention.

Miscellaneous shorter notes:

What if Kirihara made a chat bot of his brother on character ai? Out of a lonely desperation to talk to him again. I feel that would not be out of the realm of possibility of things he’d do and it would be funny. If only character ai didn’t have a crazy strict violence filter these days sigh. A boy can’t even get beat up by his brother on there anymore. If not for that he’d either get so unhealthily obsessed or he’d be upset that it’s not accurate enough to how his brother acted and then only miss him more.

Kirihara only truly likes getting beat up by people he holds a certain level of respect for. He sees himself as better than a lot of people honestly and he wants someone who is on his level, or more accurately his brother’s level. This is why he looks down on Nakamura and dislikes being picked on by him. Nakamura is a scaredy cat who only picks on people who can’t defend themselves. This is why, despite getting beat up by his gang and enjoying it somewhat, it’s not enough for him. Other than just the fact that they’re scared to hurt him badly of course. It’s just the best he could get. But Kirihara looks down on the people in his gang and he said so. He wants to be hurt by his brother or someone he can idolize in the same way. Towa even said he must have a superiority complex. I do think a LOT of his behavior is just mimicking his brother as a way to feel close to him though, so this probably comes from how Megumu acted.

Au where Kirihara gets cancelled on Twitter for being freaky about his brother on main which leads to him getting doxxed and because he gets doxxed it’s found out that he’s a gang leader and that’s how he gets caught. All the while Kirihara is hoping with all this extra attention on him his brother might see the tweets and they will be reunited. This does not happen.

Kirihara gets executed by the Takasato Gumi right? What if he was thinking leading up to that of his brother coming to save him and that just… obviously doesn’t happen. Also I think Kirihara would genuinely wish he had died during the Euphoric episode instead. He doesn’t seem afraid of death but that’s obviously not his ideal death so.

Gonnna headcanon that Sakaki actually murders Kirihara by running him over with a truck in the true route because I thought him randomly dying by being run over by a truck was funny. That is all.

Want a less toxic alternative to Madarame x Kirihara? (Or Kirihara x his brother for that matter-) try Kotarou x Kirihara! Kotarou would absolutely still beat him up I feel but Kotarou is at least a decent person and would be respectful. I know people like to point out how Kotarou is one of the only Nitro Chiral guys who consistently asks for and respects consent. Like he is so chill about it whenever Towa turns him down. This has led me to take the bit further and headcanon him sitting down Towa for a conversation about boundaries and safe words and stuff (Towa is barely listening, he did not previously know this was a thing nor does he care. The day you hear a safe word come out of that man’s mouth is the day he quits smoking.) Anyway. Kirihara would probably have a similar reaction but more mad about it. Like “wtf why are we doing this just hurt me already.” At least Kotarou tried though lol.

Think I’ve run out of Kirihara notes for now- I know that ended up being a little mini rant about Kotarou and the end but shhh it was kind of Kirihara related. Thought I’d share my Kirihara hyperfixation thoughts with few other Kirihara fans that exist though. We have to stick together to provide each other content! Might write some Kirihara fanfic at some point but actually writing is way harder than thinking about writing so. No promises

#nitro+chiral #slow damage #kirihara nozomu #nozomu kirihara

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makeste · 1 year ago

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BnHA Volume 35 - A Brief Reaction Journey

hello! so as mentioned in my last post, I’ve started catching up with the BnHA manga again FINALLY after almost two years, and have made it through a fair number of chapters so far! and since I’m not sure how long it will take me to actually post the corresponding liveblogs, I figured I’d make a couple of posts in the meantime to sort of preview my reaction journey thus far with some good old-fashioned OUT-OF-CONTEXT BULLET POINTS taken from my ramblings. originally I was going to make a single post for all 25 chapters I’ve read so far (up to 367), but I quickly realized that was waaaaay too ambitious lol. so for now it’s just this one, and I’ll put up the vol. 36 post probably tomorrow afternoon.

spoiler warning: just fyi, this post will obviously feature spoilers for chapters 342-350*, BUT it will also include some stray spoilers from chapters 362 and 403 as well, so just a heads up for that if you aren’t fully caught up!

*chapters 340 and 341 are not included because I've already posted full reaction posts for each one here and here, respectively.

Chapter 342

Endeavor being taller than Jeanist just feels so WRONG to me regardless of whether or not it is factually accurate. does this mean All Might is also taller than Jeanist?? I don’t want to live in a world where Best Jeanist has secretly been a perfectly normal sized person this entire time. someone please lie to me and tell me that he is tall

many thanks to Kacchan for inserting this small bit of levity into this scene which was otherwise well on its way to sending me into a SPIRAL OF FEELINGS, and in fact still is whenever I look at that panel of Deku with Eri and Kouta, and also that GODDAMN HUG WHERE HE AND INKO ARE BOTH CLEARLY AND PAINFULLY AWARE THAT THEY MIGHT NEVER SEE EACH OTHER AGAIN, AND IN THAT MOMENT THEY’RE JUST TRYING TO HOLD THE OTHER AS TIGHTLY AS PHYSICALLY POSSIBLE, AND SHE’S PRAYING TO WHATEVER DEITY IS OUT THERE THAT HE’LL COME BACK SAFE AND WHOLE, AND HE’S PRAYING THAT HIS MOM WILL BE ALL RIGHT EVEN IF HE DOESN’T COME BACK, AND NOT ALLOWING HIMSELF TO THINK ABOUT HOW MUCH HE ALREADY MISSES HER, BECAUSE HE CAN’T THINK LIKE THAT ANY MORE, BECAUSE THIS BOY IS FULLY GROWN NOW BECAUSE HE HAD TO BE, BECAUSE HE HAD NO CHOICE, AND I’M BOTH SO PROUD AND SO FUCKING SAD ABOUT IT AND I JUST NEED A MINUTE HERE ACTUALLY, OKAY!! OR FIVE MINUTES!!

LMAO WHAT AN AUSPICIOUS AND NOT-AT-ALL OMINOUSLY FOREBODING NAME. “hmmm what should we name our new class 1-A fortress?” “hmm well I was thinking maybe Troy, after the legendary city with the famously impenetrable walls, which to the best of my knowledge were never breached, or at least that’s what I assume since I never finished reading The Iliad! :) :) :) ...wait, why are you all looking at me like that. they didn’t actually breach them, right? guys? what happened to Troy? GUYS?”

I’m actually so proud of Deku because he’s come such a long way from the days when the mere CONCEPT of even TALKING to a girl was enough to floor him lol. but also I’m legit cracking up at he way he tried to segue into random small talk in the middle of the goddamn apocalypse. gotta be smooth about it!! casual!! you can tell how casual they are because both of them are suddenly struck by the inexplicable urge to fuss with their hair!!

Horikoshi really said “FUCK YOUR SQUADS!! ...but if we had a Todosquad this is who would be in it I guess”

my god. between this and the OchaDeku conversation the villains truly do not stand a chance do they? and they don’t even know how screwed they are yet. REDEMPTION IS COMING!! IT’S KNOCKING ON THE DOOR, TRICK OR TREAT, Y’ALL READY FOR THIS

Chapter 343

so we’re opening with everyone’s favorite Guy With An Old Wad Of Chewing Gum For A Face, AFO!

did this son of a bitch kill Nao’s dad and steal his sexy lie-detector quirk??

sob AFO is all “can I have your son’s cell phone number please” and they’re all “SURE”

bonsoir little Yuuga

do. ...do you not actually know. was this meeting not prearranged. “why are you here Aoyama?” “why are you here, Deku?” truly, why are any of us here??

I’m sitting here trying to play the “guess which parts of this dialogue are real vs fake” game and coming up completely stumped on every single sentence

so Yuuga’s all “can you believe that even though the city of Musutafu is basically down to just U.A., a Dollar Tree, a couple of crumbling park benches, and one very determined Starbucks, we somehow still have functioning courts and lawyers?” I actually can’t believe that at all tbh. you’re telling me “it’s the fucking apocalypse” is still not a good enough excuse to get out of jury duty

damn, Aoyama out here with the trash talk and the ON YOUR LEFT?!

MONOMA??!?!?!?!

Chapter 344

“Eraser’s” plan, indeed. you dare say that right to Kaminari’s face

SHINSOU!!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!??!?!?

HEYA YOURSELF YOU HANDSOME KNAVE!! LOOK AT YOU!! fucking loving the costume my dude! pretty please tell us your hero name to go along with it. is it MindCraft. I think your hero name should be MindCraft. don’t look at me like that Shinsou we need more punny hero names in the world

“yes well you see, I couldn’t do it, so I learned how to do it.” great story Shinsou

the way he’s rubbing the back of his neck there. are we gonna get some real Monoma character development at long last. feels like it’s long overdue and I am thrilled. he’s such a great character and I feel like we’ve only barely scratched the surface of who he actually is as a person and as a hero

THE UNEXPECTED VLAD KING MENTORSHIP WITH THE ARM AROUND THE SHOULDERS?? he really needed that support. outwardly he’s always made a big show of wanting his turn in the spotlight and begrudging class A for stealing the scene at every turn. but how much of that is really just an act. some of it? most of it? maybe even close to all of it? because right now he suddenly seems so small and young here and really wishing he wasn’t in this unenviable position of being one of the many World’s Last Hopes who are all way too fucking young

did Mirko’s giant robot hand just grow into an EVEN GIANTER giant robot hand??

long beautiful flowing mermaid hair. sorry what was I saying I kind of spaced out there for a sec

YES, AFO, ALL OF THIS TO SPLIT YOU UP YOU STUPID MUSH HEAD. MAYBE IF YOU EVER ACTUALLY FINISHED A MANGA IN YOUR GODDAMN LIFE YOU’D KNOW HOW A FINAL BATTLE IS SUPPOSED TO BE CONSTRUCTED. YOU MOLDY AVOCADO

Chapter 345

“no you don’t understand, we have so many sixteen-year-olds whose coattails we’re all hanging onto. we have sixteen-year-olds who can take over people’s minds. sixteen-year-olds who can create portals to warp you halfway around the world in an instant. and let’s not forget the sixteen-year-olds who can act their damn asses off. we have the best sixteen-year-olds in the world. our sixteen-year-olds are so much better than yours you fucking losers”

Deku I swear. if I’m about to discover that the reason you weren’t there to stop Kacchan from being literally, actually, canonically murdered is because your distracted ass got yoinked into the void by some no-name villain chucklefuck, I’m gonna...

don’t listen to him Aoyama you were magnificent. you were my favorite in all of the stage plays

BUT IS PHASE TWO SUPPOSED TO INVOLVE DEKU IN ANY WAY THOUGH??? HELLO??? IS ANYONE LISTENING TO ME??? I’M FROM THE FUTURE AND THIS IS URGENT, PLEASE

“I fucked up Ochako, I fucked up so bad” omfg Deku

she doesn’t want to hurt you Deku she just wants to shower you in love. in her own special way. by stabbing you a lot

anyway have fun on this... tropical island??? I guess?? Kacchan will just have to hold down the fort in the meantime. which I’m sure will go absolutely fine

Chapter 346

“th-th-this is really bad, right?” yes Tamaki, yes it is. you’re stuck here on the Super Mega Ultra Radical Gnarly Cracked-Out Wonder Stage with Shigaraki Fucking Tomura and at least two of you are about to die and I’M NOT OKAY

so now we’re also getting this hilarious insight into the inner workings of the Mega Ultra Tremendous Stupendous Incredible Sky Coffin and it is truly, truly phenomenal

Horikoshi stop taking my sarcastic jibes and owning them completely challenge!! all the best sixteen-year-olds. all the finest greatest Hyper Ultra Sparkle Glimmer Wonder Battle Stages

this is genuinely one of the boldest lampshading efforts I have ever seen in fiction you guys

“yes, we acknowledge that this does indeed seem impossible to have pulled off, BUT have you considered that, fucking quirks though???? AND THAT THEY ARE, AS THE KIDS SAY, WILD??”

Chapter 347

lmao they’re shouting at Monoma accusingly and he’s all “I’M HAVEN’T BLINKED AT ALL YOU GUYS I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO TELL YOU”

don’t mind him, he’s just out here growing out his hideously malformed hands and fingers endlessly from every part of his body, normally, as one does. nothing quirk-related about it. anyone could do this if they simply exercise and maintain a balanced diet. this 100% is not a quirk y’all it’s just essential oils

SUDDEN MONOMA FEELS DELIVERED TO MY DOORSTEP???

awwww. the way he’s almost panicked, frantically wondering if he somehow fucked the quirk up and desperate for Aizawa to believe him that he’s trying his best. and Aizawa quick to reassure him. this kid is so desperate for approval. and unapologetically careening his way onto my top ten character list, welcome dear boy

so that’s that. see you in two years Deku. his last words spoken out loud to Kacchan were, and I quote, “wha --”

Aizawa is so hopelessly impossibly hot at all times and I don’t know how the universe can handle his existence. he’s even doing it without activating his quirk now. no ponytails or anything. just an eyepatch and a dream

don’t mind me, I’m just out here doing literal algebra to figure out how long it would take Deku to get back here if he traveled at the same speed as All Might did in chapter 90 (30 seconds per 5km, apparently). about 20 minutes, give or take. well shit. hopefully he’s a little faster than Kamino-era All Might was, especially since he can fly and has that Fa Jin shit too. or maybe Rody can fly him lmao. or S&S’s hot fighter pilot boyfriend

“what’d Sensei say, Deku?” “he said no, looks like I gotta uber. can I borrow your credit card, I promise I will venmo you back”

unfortunately for Deku he does not realize he’s accidentally gotten himself caught up in what will undoubtedly end up being the most erotic and bisexual of the various final battles

can’t believe Deku has like 6 love interests and out of all of them, Toga is the first one who actually asks him out. good for you girl. gotta shoot your shot

Chapter 348

FELLAS IS IT GAY TO BREAK OUT INTO TERRIFIED BEN DAY DOTS BECAUSE A GIRL EXPRESSED HER CARNAL INTEREST IN YOU????

anyway so since Deku apparently doesn’t understand how romance works either, he’s trying his best to give an actual response by recontextualizing all of this in terms of the one big thing he does understand: All Might

you’re telling me you never wanted to stab All Might to death and then turn into him?? wow I just can’t believe it

but also... okay lol. so I was thinking about this sarcastically, but was then struck by the very unironic thought that there sorta kinda is someone whom Deku does, both consciously and subconsciously, try to be like, and who he also kinda does apparently share the same heart and mind as. at least if chapter 403 is anything to go by lol. soooooooo. huh

god damn it Toga. absolutely none of what you’ve said or done here has been even the SLIGHTEST BIT reasonable. you can’t just tell someone you want to stab them and be their girlfriend. and if and when they try to let you down easy by responding with the MOST THOUGHTFUL AND GENTLE REJECTION ANYONE COULD EVER POSSIBLY MAKE UNDER THESE CIRCUMSTANCES, because they’re actually the WORLD’S NICEST MAN, you can’t just respond by doing whatever it is you’re presumably about to do, which I’m guessing is gonna be really violent and unhinged

so Ochako is all “ever since we fought last time I’ve been thinking about you a lot!” and Toga is all “are you serious, YOU broke up with ME bitch” and now she’s standing behind her with a knife

“she’s the least predictable of our opponents” YEAH NO KIDDING LOL

“everyone knows that Toga is actually Ochako’s villain, like ffs Deku you haven’t even interacted with her since the Provisional Exam arc.” Deku they’re 100% right and you’re looking more and more the fool with each passing second

well all right lol. twenty minutes to get back to Musutafu. let’s just hope he doesn’t run into any traffic on the way

Chapter 349

what the fuck is OFA Dos’s quirk exactly and are we ever gonna get to it before I literally die of old age. at this point there’s gotta be a reason why he’s not using it, right?? so what’s the deal there? does he still somehow not know how? is it too dangerous? and I really need to know why II has the Bakugou gauntlets. tell me this isn’t one of the things we’re still waiting on answers for two years down the line because I swear to god I will cry

anyway so Deku’s saying he’s doing his best but he’s still “too slow”. WELL THEN MAYBE IT’S THAT TIME?? DEKU?? WHAT DO YOU SAY

NO FUCKING WAY LOL, CAN IT REALLY BE THAT EASY??!

OH WHAT THE FUCK, FUCK YOU NOT!CCHAN LOL YOU’RE JUST HERE TO COCKBLOCK HIM?

fuck. so has he used it since then?? is he gonna use it finally now that Kacchan’s alive and well again?? oh my god I need to shut up and stop asking questions and just keep reading. fuck

wow so Dabi’s literally just burning the All Might statue while he stalls for time trying to figure out how to beat his OP little brother who was literally engineered to be better than him sob. out of all the villains he’s probably the most screwed right now isn’t he

starting to get an inkling Dabi’s not happy that he doesn’t actually get to fight Endeavor. getting some subtle hints here and there that he might actually be upset about that

apparently wanting to fight Dabi and stop him from helping to destroy the world makes Shouto a pawn. wake up Shouto. stop being such a sheep, Shouto. can’t you see that saving the world is exactly what Endeavor wants you to do???!

this is just going to be seventeen chapters of Dabi talking about nonsense while they both stand around progressively getting hotter both literally and metaphorically isn’t it

Chapter 350

OH SNAP. [SLAMS HAND ON TABLE] HERE WE GO. IT’S FINALLY THAT TIME

well, well, well. to the surprise of absolutely no one. the real one who was responsible for everything this whole time

but I just have to pause real quick before we continue. because it absolutely cannot be a coincidence that AFO just happened to be there once again. just waiting in the shadows to magically swoop in the minute disaster strikes. and so, just like with baby Tenko, this immediately makes me suspect that Touya burning himself alive was not in fact a training accident at all. which is something I did not expect, and which, just. fuck, fuck, FUCK AFO. fuck this guy.

looks like the children's ward of a hospital?? wait, what??

how the fuck is he still so adorable. when exactly did the transition take place between adorable and sexily unhinged. right now Todoroki Touya still looks to be the absolute most adorable child on the planet

I miscalculated. I was not emotionally prepared to handle this chapter right now. I should not have clicked

really love to see that Touya didn’t just cave right away. wouldn’t have felt right, ngl. just doesn’t fit in with what we know about his character

oh shit wait we’re cutting back to Dabi talking to Shouto and he says he did come back home??

fucking why. goddammit what the hell. why is this the saddest fucking thing I’ve ever read. LOVE HIM!! SOMEONE!! ANYONE!! just love him, please. literally all he has ever wanted!!

JESUS. I HATE THIS. I am so upset right now. out of all of the horrific and traumatic and terrible, awful things that have happened to BnHA characters in their flashbacks, the thing that hits me the most out of all of them is this one image of a sixteen-year-old boy standing before an altar, with his family very much alive and standing RIGHT FUCKING THERE IN THE NEXT ROOM, and yet somehow feeling more alone than he’s ever been. so alone he literally gives up all hope in this one moment. my god I feel all of it and it’s so fucking devastating I keep having to stop typing so I don’t completely break down sobbing

well damn. after a rush of 15 and 13-page chapters, which were all admittedly appreciated by me in my race to catch up to Light Fades to Rain before this coming Friday, Horikoshi finishes up the volume with one hell of a 17 page finale. once again the Tododrama delivers. this was fucking phenomenal

#bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha vol. 35 #way too many characters to tag so I am not gonna bother!#bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha #lotta 'calm before the storm' chapters in this one #also I was kinda disappointed by the cover of this volume ngl #but at least monoma and shinsou got their little moment on the back #vol. 36 post should be up tomorrow #vol. 37 post to follow once I finish the rest of those chapters #and then I'll start posting the actual recaps again probably in a couple of weeks or so #once I finish catching up

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