#I desperately need to sin
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Ted Raimi as Father Tulli - The Damned Thing (Masters of Horror S2E1)
#ted raimi#the damned thing#father tulli#masters of horror#priest kink activated#forgive me father#I desperately need to sin#my gifs#those pouty lips
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We were robbed of a full desolation row cover. All 11 minutes of it
#I desperately need Gerard to say “her professions her religion her sin is her lifelessness#my chemical romance#mcr#Mikey way#gerard way#ray toro#frank iero#desolation row#bob dylan#text post#txt post
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Let me assign you an affection language.
A Knife Called Grief You have left your house, you have left those people behind, but what are you going to do about the memories which have taken root in you? You can run but not without them. You want someone to sit with you on this cool marble floor while the sun burns everything.You want them to cut your rotten heart and theirs too. You want to sit with it in front of you, let them see you with all your flaws, which haven’t been your fault but you have been made to believe so, and you want them to love you anyways. Because you know you’d do that for them.
[yoinked from iobartach]
#[inch resting]#ooc#dash game#[reminds me of a post I saw about Miguel's infidelity-- I can't find it anymore but basically it boiled down to#his betrayal of Gabriel and Xina being a sort of betrayal of himself. Now the OP was also trying to make sense of the comic's writing as it#also mischaracterized Xina (per their words)‚ but since Miguel knew Xina since they were young and she protected him from bullies‚ and#Miguel grew up shielding Gabriel from their parents‚ his betrayal and subsequent estrangement from them for someone new‚ someone his brothe#loved‚ and also apparently supported Alchemax whereas Xina was much quicker to criticize it‚ can be seen as Miguel trying to shove down the#vulnerable‚ hurt‚ HUMAN side of himself to make way for the idealized version he tries to protect as a corpo snob.#Which is an interesting viewpoint considering post-forcible-genome-splicing‚ comics!Miguel was also desperate to prove his humanity. He see#himself as an abomination‚ a freak. So how do we reconcile this with movie!Miguel‚ who we admittedly don't know much of his mental state#other than he is basically having The Worst Fucking Day Of His Life Constantly due to grief and leading hundreds of Peter Parkers?#I guess in my own characterization‚ Miguel is trying desperately to shut down that vulnerability‚ BE the inhuman juggernaut‚ the leader‚#but at the same time time‚ esp post-BTSV‚ is so ridden by his mistakes and sins and endless list of shortcomings‚ ALONG WITH the grief for#his daughter that he doesn't seem keen to heal from‚ that he's simultaneously trying to REconnect with that. Figure out what and who he is#outside of work‚ outside of Canon Events‚ outside of everything that Miles took and shook upside down. But that's difficult when#you're so determined to shut that down too‚ huh? Spider-Man can't do both. Not this time. Miguel is going to have to learn one day that he#needs to allow himself to FEEL human instead of constantly shutting it down or drowning it out. Maybe then he'll BE human again too.]#[🍻 if you read this far; I fear this was largely incoherent]
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just so you know I'll never recover from the ending of magi like yeah in general it left me devistated but Jafar's final appearance being him back in the sindria robes still with this just steadfast never ending belief in a man who he devoted his life to and who then in return betrayed him on such a fundamental level. like im gutted.
#:v#jafar magi#Magi#the only way I can describe the ending from Jafar's perspective is cruel like that's the only word#how they end out his character. back where he started waiting on sin. I can't man I literally can't#sinja#in spirit#Like it's worse than kill your gays it's leave ur gay abandoned and waiting for his dead husband to return#Hes literally a 1920s house wife leaning against the window wistfully wondering when his husband will return from war#Like I do enjoy this emotion from fiction but I'm not sure it was the intended effect#I need to lie down#Jafar makes me so miserable BRING HIS HUSBAND BACK#where's my ''jafar I'm home'' for post magi .#He's still waiting on sin to come back. he still believes in him#what's more heartwrenching Jafar's last interaction with him being jafar thinking he had really gotten through to sin when it was a lie#or that not even being enough for Jafar to lose his faith in Sinbad.#I can't fucking do this#It was such a come to grace moment for Jarfar too#He was literally pleading with Sinbad he was so desperate to get through to him#all love and devotion and faith and Sinbad threw that all back in his face and betrayed him#AND JAFAR IS STILL THERE. WAITING. HOPING. LOVING.#IM GONNA VOMIT
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Demon Gowther headcanons because he's literally the best (trust) and there's not enough canon or general content about him!! (featuring Glariza and merlins dad here and there)
He loves cats, absolutely adores them. before he was goatdad he was catdad. Glariza thinks it's the sweetest thing ever seeing her husband (or bf at the time) at the front door most mornings feeding strays
childhood friends with the chief of Belialuin (merlins dad). they were forced apart because of the war and eventually stopped thinking of eachother, having to worry more and more about their own families as the war got more serious.
when gowther started mentoring merlin, they saw eachother again. after that they didn't lose contact again.
he couldn't attend merlins dad's funeral since he was already locked up at that point.
fell in love with Glariza the second he layed eyes on her.
"Mate, look at her. look look look look look."
"Who am I supposed to be looking at, gowther?"
"the pretty one"
"... her? the one that looks like she's a porcelain doll?"
"oh don't be foolish, no one could ever recreate that beauty."
"right."
...
"can you talk to her for me, please"
"do it yourself loverboy."
this mans a poet and romantic, through and through. you can not change my mind
got mistaked for a butch lesbian before growing out his facial hair
loves taking baths whilst fully clothed. he has fallen asleep. Glariza is mildly concerned but leaves him be.
he lives by "happy wife happy life"
Him and Glariza were basically Merlin's second parents when she was growing up, but when she reached her teenage years, he started mentoring her and a bunch of stuff happened (including Glariza's death) she grew distant and started seeing him purely as her teacher
Bisexual. so is Glariza. Bi wife and Bi husband
Does not like cheese. cannot stand the smell of it either. Will gag.
used to drink but stopped completly a year or two into his marriage.
The fastest menace before he got wheelchair bound. could not stay still for more than a minute. tosses and turns constantly in his sleep.
deaf in one ear beacuse of an experiment going wrong and a very very loud explosion going off right next to his left ear
used to read loads but went into a reading slump at one point and never really came out of it.
His parents pride and joy, but they died when he was really young.
Loves it when people play with his hair. merlin's dad used to do it all the time when they were kids, he'd take two strands and twist them together because he didn't know how to braid.
really wanted to be father. Glariza was 3 months pregnant when mael killed her.
had an emo phase. like a proper proper one. dyed a part of his hair black so he had a blonde baliage and a bunch of piercings (he kept all his ear piercings and eyebrow piercing)
very loud and had little to no volume control. learnt how to control it whilst locked up.
talked to himself whilst imprisoned, but acted like he was talking to glariza and the kid he never got to have.
whilst making the doll gowther, he modeled him after glariza, but changed a couple things. made his hair brighter and longer, his eyes greener and gave him glasses. this was so he could also resemble what him and Glariza's child could have looked like if they had taken after their mother.
does not sneeze, just shakes in place like an old washing machine.
he was also quite close friends with Meliodas and zeldris' mother, and was there for most of Meliodas' childhood (he taught him how to cook because His mother was too busy and the demon king is not about to be any kind of maternal figure)
he's very creative and loves to make things, mainly items of clothing. he handmade Glariza's wedding dress
That's all for now, might update if I get any more ideas
#nanatsu no taizai#seven deadly sins#goatdad#demon gowther#gowther#glariza nnt#chief of Belialuin nnt#headcanon#I desperately need friends with the se hyperfixations#I love him so much#I need more demon gowther lore#nakaba please bring him back
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AKSNWKSNWK WE'RE SO BACK BABY!!!!!!
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I HAVE SO MANY FEELINGS RN!!!!!! I'm worried that this banishment thing will take a big big toll on Stolas' already unstable mental state, BUT BUT I'm hopeful about Stolizt relationship 🥺 they really gotta speak their hearts out next ep, they got near the "i love you" but not close enough... not so explicitly AAAHHHHHH i can't wait for December!!!! 😭😭😭😭
#helluva boss#helluva boss spoilers#stolitz#stolas goetia#blitzø buckzo#there is so much stuff to comment.... like the group openly saying I LOVE YOU to each other 😭😭😭#LOONA CALLING BLITZØ DAD!!! HELLO????#the SINS!!!!!! SATAN HIMSEF#i love vassago too 🥹🥹🥹🥹#and i really hope theyre gonna take octavia away from stella because she needs to UNDERSTAND 🫠#also PLEASE buy stolas his antidepressant he desperately needs 😩
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(Hgsn 24- 3 spoilers also volume warning‼️ lol)
Original video the audio was taken from (flashing warning? Maybe?):
youtube
#the summer hikaru died#hikaru ga shinda natsu spoilers#hgsn spoilers#i know Yoshiki’s sanity has been at 0 for a long time but these two panels really sold it lol#Also Yoshiki I know you’re kind of desperate to figure out the “Indou family’s sin” but it is NOT worth talking to your dad about#but also 👀 I need to know more
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tad is sooo franz kafka coded btw. it hurts
#its 1am and. can u see it. i cannot not see it. have i already said it?#its abt the shame and the guilt and the desperate need to justify and the dirt of sin just below the skin even just for feeling. nnngh#bully scholarship edition#canis canem edit#tad spencer#odyposts
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it deeply agonizes me that the speak now elements of the manuscript are never discussed in favor of the atw of it all..... like i just. "in the age of him she wished she was 30 and made coffee every morning in a french press" vs "someday when we're older, this is something we'll laugh about over coffee every morning while you're watching the news," "now and then she rereads the manuscript of the entire torrid affair" vs "i used to think one day i'd tell the story of us," "afterwards she only ate kids cereal and couldn't sleep unless it was in her mother's bed" vs never grow up exploring the idea of moving out for the first time & how she couldn't be sleeping in her mother's bed if she was already moved out (also robin being the last song before the manuscript already creating this mental connection)..... please im insane
#album: the tortured poets department#album: speak now#the manuscript#multi song#red strings#textposts#speak now/ttpd sister analysis#also ideas of ''give you my heart'' vs the half of my heart JM collab#and ''slow dance alight with the sparks'' vs JM's slow dancing in a burning room#but tho i think they're Relevant i kinda don't like making stuff about the Men™ of it all#cause the point of the story is that it's an analysis on personal trauma and an exploration of the reason all the behaviors on ttpd happen#but like. so much of ttpd is paralleled in speak now like that album is Thee catalyst for everything#also atw10 being written during speak now tour rehearsals inherently makes atw speak now coded too so like. you cannot escape speak now#she haunts the narrative#but the manuscript makes me insane every time i think about it#you go through the whole main album and think things like#''hmm bdilh has real ours energy. i can fix him has real superman delulu energy. tsmwel has real dear john energy''#down bad is haunted and mbobhft is innocent and fresh out the slammer is sparks fly and ttpd is mine and guilty as sin is i can see you#and then you get to the end of it all and you realize that there was a Point to those parallels#that there was a Point to wcs and the midnights 3am trilogy/storyline#that speak now's story and themes are the catalyst for literally e verything#both in terms of an emotional sense and also a work ethic sense#the idea that speak now was fully self written as a means of proving naysayers wrong#and that mentality goes hand in hand with the denial and desperation to prove others wrong about this romantic relationship#and there's success in one path but not in the other and it's so difficult to reconcile with that (the prophecy)#god its all too much these tags don't even scratch the surface#i desperately need to just write this whole essay or i'll go insane with all these thoughts
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so no one was going to tell me this picture existed huh? I had to find out all on my own??
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#brb killing myself#WHY HAVE I NEVER SEEN THIS BEFORE#the way i want him is so so sinful#he could do anything to me and id say please and thank you#i need him desperately#[redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted]#carlos sainz jr#carlos sainz#amor de mi vida#f1#formula 1#formula one
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Catholic guilt is when you feel bad for not giving away your food to a crow even after you fed it enough food that it was full enough to just carry what it couldn't eat back to its nest
#i have so much.....and this crow...hes living outside in this horrible winter weather....#i snapped apart a whole peperoni stick and a cheesestick for him#and im taken back to a horrible day in sunday school where they made us color this page#it was of a fat greedy rich man eating a feast in front of a absolutely starving and malnourished man holding a begging bowl#and i had nightmares of being homeless and begging at windows at families eating lavish dinners#like i think the message they were trying to send was you need to give to those in need more#but im pretty sure at least a chunk of us fixated more on the even if youre starving and need help desperately. people can just. not help.#like those who were blessed or whatever with food can decide to not help you even if they have it in excess. but its not a sin.#because its not greed if you keep a gift from god/a blessing all to yourself#my church wasnt great at teaching us tiny children. but when things did stick it was usually from guilt
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i’m so bad at school that it’s rewriting my parents’ dna
#my mom’s actually trying to MAKE me drop classes that i dont need; she’s INSISTING that i quit stats#this the opposite of how i was raised LITERALLY MY ENTIRE LIFE#growing up; dropping classes was a mortal sin ok??? it meant that ur lazy and stupid and u just don’t wanna work hard#i was berated every time i’d bring it up in the past#SO U CAN IMAGINE HOW DESPERATE SHE IS RN#boy how the turn tables#stan’s forum
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No one will ever understand the Criston/Alicent/Rhaeynra/Daemon love square like I do
#hotd#asoiaf#I think a big problem is that so many people lack the background understanding of what the targaryens truly are#and how Targaryen exceptionalism informs their worldwives#and how that then affects their perception of their non-targaryens friends and loved ones#when analysing rhaenyra/alicent you need to understand that alicent was sexually attracted but also envied/wanted to be rhaenyra#because of her freedom power charisma charm etc#but rhaenyra's girlhood affection of alicent died with her marriage to her father#because that was an unforgivable sin in her eyes#when analsysing rhaenyra/criston you need to do so with the view that rhaenyra was acting like a prince who had taken a fancy#to a lowborn girl who's dreams of a romantic life with a dashing prince are cruelly thwarted when he chooses the crown over her#and the idea of shattered chilvraous/romantic ideals that the kingsguard characters often play with in asoiaf#when analysing Alicent/criston you need to understand how their second class status to rhaenyra and their failed relationships with her#led to them fill empty shameful and lesser in her absence#and that the two gravitate towards the targaryens ideological opposites (the faith of the seven)#and in turn look to each other to fill her void#when analysing daemon/rhaenyra you have to understand that rhaenyra is sexually attracted to daemon but also desperately wants to be him#she is the Alicent in this situation#for daemon rhaenyra is an ends to the throne but is also the only other person on earth that he feels is near is equal#because they’re drawn together by Targaryen exceptionalism
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i think most art that tries to critique christianity, and specifically american charismatic christianity, is shallow and honestly corny unless it comes from someone who has experience w that institution
#and by experience i mean either grew up in it or has done a lot of research#i'm listening to saved! by reverend kristin michael hayter (lingua ignota's new project) and parts made me very nauseous in a good way#like for the most part she's just playing it straight and that's more effective than any over the top parody could ever be#like being raised to believe that you are constantly at war w yourself and your mind and your body and you cannot trust yourself#bc you're inheritantly sinful and these authority figures (both the church leadership and god) are the only ones who can properly guide you#and all of the ppl you love but aren't christian are going to hell and it's your job to either convert them or leave them behind#bc they'll just tempt you to abandon your own road to salvation so you should only form relationships w other christians#is already terrifying on it's own w no more random bits hooked on to it and her voice is so haunting and the production is so off putting#like she sounds so desperate in parts of this album like she NEEDS what she's saying to be true and she's gonna force it to be real#anyway parts of this album brought me back to being a child and seeing ppl collapse screaming sobbing and speaking in tongues around me#and i forgot how much that scared me#my posts#.txt
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knew this shit was sad but nobody told me it was going to be this fucking sad
#can you believe this is not ab stsg#basically my best friend is back in town and we finally caught up to mdzs s3 together and made it halfway thru today…#xue yang and xiao xingchen’s part basically ripped my fucking heart out#there’s sooooo many things i want to say ab it but for now the soundtrack is so good like genuinely soooooo good#whoever is scoring the mxtx donghua knows exactly what to do if they want me to cry on cue LMAO#notable moments… when a qing opened xiao xingchen’s coffin for the first time… the look in her eyes :(#ofc wei ying’s infamous 你不配… xiao xingchen realizing who he just stabbed not by sight but by touch of the engraving on his sword…#and having to realize who he’s REALLY been killing every night for two years all dawning on him within the span of a couple minutes…#xue yang desperately trying to salvage the scattering fragments of xiao xingchen’s soul like his life depended on it…#AND THE SCENE WHERE XIAO XINGCHEN… SUFFOCATED BY THE BURDEN OF HIS SINS THAT WEREN’T EVEN HIS FAULT TO BEGIN WITH… TAKING HIS OWN LIFE…#and the ‘it wasn’t your fault’ AT THE END… MXTX U WILL PAY FOR UR CRIMES!!!!!!!#how tf am i supposed to watch shibuya arc like this I NEED TO RECOVER#cattoru’s#mdzs#xxc#xue yang
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my toxic trait is that i dont think anyone can understand "die your daughter." by susannah joffe as well as i can.
when i die will i just be remembered as your daughter? will people open their facebook accounts and see that ive died and theyll send 5 seconds thinking about me sadly and say "oh her poor father! his daughter gone so soon!" the true terror of the only remembrance of me being my father.
when i am dead and gone your name will be plastered across my gravestone like graffiti and it will be graffiti but the bad kind. the kind they spray in piss worn allys and public bathroom stalls. when people walk through the cemetery they will look at my gravestone with your last name on it and that will believe that that was my name but it isnt and it never will be
when i am dead and gone my arms folded over my corpses as i lie rotting away in my coffin under the earth there will be nothing i can do to stop hi. from being my father. Right now I can deny deny deny but when I am dead it will be his blood that leaks from my body it will be his name on the stone that stands over my carcass i will have no chance to carve out my veins that run fresh with your blood and replace them with my own i will have no chance to convince people i am not your daughter.
#another faceless girl#i hate my dad#die your daughter#only thing stopping me from dying rlly#people will feel sorry for my father#and no one will have any idea of who he is#but in all honesty that song#OHHHHH THAT SONG 😭🙏😭🙏😭🙏😭#i need to be locked in a dark room with it on repeat#or restrained and sedated#really whats the difference?#buttt oooh she gets me#SUSANNAH JOFFE YOU GET ME#I WISH YOUD STOP HONESTLY ITS FREAKING ME OUT NGL 😭#hate my dad#hateeeee him#lowkey hope he dies in a hole#(tee hee no i wont i want him to love me so desperately i will do anything he asks of me i need to be loved so badly i will forgive#any past sins he has ever commied against me i need him to love me i need him to be proud of me its not a want its a physical visceral need#IM NOT HIS DAUGHTER#I AM NOT HIS DAUGHTER I AM NOT HIS DAUGHTER I AM NOT HIS DAUGHTER#daddy issues
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