#I can't bring myself to keep listening
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Every day I wake up, I'm full of inspiration and ambition, I lollygag a bit, I kinda skirt around it, I actively avoid The Thing I WANT to do. Then I just kinda give up and do something else.
#idk what's up w this but like. the more intensely i WANT the more i can't bring myself to do it.#like feh example like you'd think bc it's ALL i'm on about. i'd be deeply IN the source material#and i have felt i've been away doing my own thing for too long i need to revisit it. i Need to#but for some reason it's unbearable. not bad. i just can't bear it. i do NOT know what's up w that#i wanna keep listening to a playlist too (hoping it's still up) but like. i broke away. and i am struggling to return.#AND LIKE. BEYOND FEH. i feel this about video games in general like i have to do something that requires no commitment.#labyrinth of galleria was great for this. for some INEXPLICABLE reason. it is just a COMPLETELY different experience#like. the feelings i feel when playing galleria vs like etrian odyssey where i'm VERY attached to my guys#the most upsetting side effect is i feel like i'm losing alfonse's voice like i feel like i used to be able#to mimic his speech patterns PERFECTLY. but everything just feels off or not cleaned up enough#and again i can't fucking bear it. like i am almost going to fucking cry about it. like what is wrong here.#like WHY can't i get myself to DO. THE THINGS. I LIKE. THAT BRING ME JOY. THE COMMITMENT.#i think i'm also worried like i don't wanna get to the point where like. my blorbos are unrecognizable.#spent too much time in my head and now they're all warped and weird. but like. like. for some reason.#esp if i feel this INTENSE fucking affinity it's like. i get in this weird headspace where can't look directly at it.#i should do ANYTHING else. what is my fucking PROBLEM.#does anybody have a cure. or do i just give up forever.
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tagged by my beloved no.1 chappell roan stan @cordiallyfuturedwight thanks my darling <33 i can only apologise for the lack of ms roan here... i swear good luck babe has been on repeat i don't know what happened
tagging the usual suspects, apologies if i've already missed yours: @aprylynn @jiminsproof @thvinyl @cosmicdreamgrl @visionsofgideontheninth @hoseeok @kimchokejin @jihopesjoint @monismochi <333 and you dear reader
oh and see here for more of my self-proclaimed songs of the summer if you're interested in that kind of thing
#director's commentary--#comin' around again - they call her amber MARK because she never misses. this one is particularly delicious#the thrill is gone - it's stunning. listening to raye again to prepare myself for genesis#bring back the seven minute songs i say!!#i'm fighting my own diminished attention span tooth and nail but i'm losing badly because i keep getting distracted#helen of troy - we all moved on from solar power a little too quickly actually this summer we should throw our cellular devices in the wate#whatcha doing - yeah i have this song on repeat to fund dua's next vacation and it's an honour to contribute.#ALSO did everyone see the chris stapleton x dua acm performance? exquisite. they served AND they ate#bodyguard - still my fav. ryan beatty i could find you anywhere#skip to the good bit - rizzle kicks are making a comeback and my god it has been twelve LONG years without them.#nature is healing. i can hear the trumpets#ok love you bye - anyone who decides to use the line 'if you can't see my mirrors - i can't see you' is an instant icon#it's uncanny - hall & oates deep cut. it's obviously fab#so sick of dreaming - maggie rogers i will follow you to the ends of the earth. album is phenomenal. what a loser!!!#aw shoot - cuntry and music global pop sensation cmat has done it yet again. happy pride my queen#honourable mentions - rachel chinouriri's new album is really great. listen to 'it is what it is'#obviously rm made it to the artist list. who else up thinking about nuts and groin rn!!!!!#vampire weekend's new album is like something from a peanuts comic and st. vincent's new album is indescribable#but if i had to try i'd say like something from a peanuts comic but if woodstock had an insatiable bloodthirst#okay i think that just about covers it! thanks darlings#MWAH#receiptify#tag
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I mean. I guess the good news is that I am now 100% sure I'm not in love with Her™ even a little bit at all anymore, but like. At what cost.
#I think mostly I just. I miss my friend. she and I were friends. I LOVED being friends (until it became untenable obviously)#and I wish so SO much that we could have held onto that.#and I guess I could try again now but it's been so long. I doubt she even has an interest in that anymore. we've been completely no-contact#for enough time that I don't...think it's actually possible to build that back up. and I'm not sure that I won't get cagey and Weird™#about it because. you know. the memory of hurt is still there even if I can't bring myself to be mad at her anymore. even if genuinely#in a platonic way I just miss her.#though apparently she did keep the shirt I gave her and thinks about me every time she wears it. I know this because she told me#herself when I caved and messaged her a few weeks back.#there was a time where...I COULD have talked to her about everything that's going on. where I know she would have listened and#taken me seriously and offered advice even if she didn't understand. because she always made an EFFORT to understand.#and she wouldn't have judged me for handling things so badly or like...feeling them in the first place? for all the shit that happened she#never thought I was An Inconvenience™ or too Messy™ to bother with.#she always took me seriously in a way that few people ever have. she was so...patient. and thoughtful. and it was never a burden for#her to be those things. I'm a difficult person I think. but it didn't seem like that when I was her friend. and GOD do I mourn that.#anyway. enough waxing poetic on my fucking birthday lmao.#today is for playing Farming Game and talking to friends#In the Vents
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Me, when Sebastian joins my party for the first time: Okay, this time I'm not going to forget about you, Sebastian. I'm going to make an effort to use you a lot this playthrough so I can better understand you.
Also me, immediately forgetting about Sebastian while finishing Act 2 and making it halfway through Act 3 before I finally notice his Faith quest: ......................Oh. Right. My bad.
#da2#dragon age 2#sebastian vael#listen in my defense..........i don't like bringing sebastian anywhere sksksks#okay look i seriously tried but every time i bring him somewhere i always think man i wish i had brought someone else#and also i do just forget about him! i finally added him to my party at one point and he had 24 points to spend...#that's how long i neglected him after i promised myself i was gonna use him more and then i didn't#it's not that i don't like sebastian as a character though i do tend to side eye him A LOT... it's just that i like everyone else more#even aveline like i'd take aveline over sebastian any day and that's saying something... or is it? i have a lot of feelings about aveline#whereas my feelings about sebastian could maybe fill a thimble...it doesn't help that in my canon run as a mage hawke#i romance anders and well... sebastian wants me to kill anders and my hawke is like 'do i approve of blowing up the chantry? complicated.'#'am i breaking up with anders for this? absolutely. do i still love him? mmhmmm. am i going to kill him sebby? i'd sooner set varric aflame#then sebastian threatens to bring an army to kirkwall and leaves so i can't say i have the greatest opinion on him#even the time where i did kill anders and he stayed in my party he was just... there#and then he glitched out and started t posing while asking if ed ever found out what anders wanted to do in the chantry so..... yeah#but even this playthrough where i'm playing as a lady warrior with a different personality and everything... i'd just rather use anyone els#also keep him away from bethany i do not approve sksksks she's too good for him#i want to understand and see the different angles of him like with the other companions but i've yet to convince myself to do it#also sebastian romancers out there can you like... explain? genuinely can you explain the appeal? i'm curious#because of all the love interests in da2 i look at sebastian and you'd think i'd maybe be more interested? but it's like...#i know about the chaste marriage and everything like that's fine i don't need sex to be a thing in the relationship but it feels less like#an asexual romance and more like... y'know... being with a priest and i guess that's just not one of my kinks? sksksks#i guess there's also the prince angle but i romanced alistair in dao and kept him a grey warden i don't really care about royalty power#and i don't have issues with him being a part of the chantry [well i do but yknow what i mean] since i romanced cullen in dai#and his whole deal with the chantry and magic and shit makes his romance interesting to me but sebastian is just.... a bit too much i think#i don't know i'd like to understand because i really don't but i also keep forgetting about him
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so anyway fuck DC, i'm tired of the same-plot-different-shoes stories give me weelchair-bound Bruce Wayne in his 50s making a bat sanctuary in the Wayne Manor gardens and discreetly doing detective work while his kids run the errands, and his worst case is Joker that he meets by the end of story and Joker kisses him on the cheek and tells him "thank you for all your hard work," before he fuck offs again.
#I have been watching a lot of super heartwarming mobies to heal myself from 2023 basically#and i keep thinking about whether we actually can do a playful calm batman scenario. and the answer is WE FUCKING CAN#it's just that everyone in the dc writing department is braindead with 67 years of therapy due#anyway i'm pitchin'#Bruce reads Alfred convoluted bedtime stories while the kids bring him info#and he can't punch the villains anymore so he goes to the spot and holds a therapy session for them#he cooks and knows 990 different salad recipes#throws himself a little dainty birthday part on his birthday when he thinks noone is watching#Bruce in a bathtub with Tim washing his hair and back as he recites case details from memory#Damien shoving a whole muffin into his mouth when he's done listening to him#Batman#Batfam#batjokes#Bruce Wayne
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Don't even get me started on Hod, I'm not immune to Hod.
#Listen man she's doing her fucking best and she's underappreciated and like she's TRYING MAN#She wants to be useful and wants to be able to bring change and wants to atone and make right her mistakes which were honest mistakes#she didn't know it would be like that she was always trying to help people and she keeps fucking it up and she can't stop fucking it up#and it sucks and it's the fucking worst because no one takes her seriously and she's constantly shit on and put down and seen as nothing#The harder she tries and the harder she fails the more she becomes a fumbling mess because it's all too much to deal with#She literally turns to drugs because it's the only escape left at this point after everything she's done she just sort of gives up because#it's all too much and she knows if she tries again she'll just fuck it up again and MAN#Also I realize that her like chipper and upbeat generally forgiving attitude is mostly a front but it's also very attractive to me#but yea she's very cute and honestly I have a thing for women in suits so like that's a given but also she's so tragic#but she's specifically tragic in a way I understand and vibe with a LOT as a fucking failure myself.#As someone who does turn to drugs to numb the literal physical pain and ease my mental depression I can really ''get it'' you know?
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#*beep* oh. hey. guess you're sleeping? maybe you're at work. or out with friends. i hope wherever you are it's good#or that it's getting better. i really do#i'm not good. but you knew that already. otherwise why would i be leaving this message?#sorry. i just need to talk for a bit i guess#cause it's like. every day i write a hundred posts and every day i delete most if not all of them#and i could not tell you why#this is my blog after all. my words and thoughts go here#but also. this is my third place. and i can't lose that#isn't that crazy? i can't lose the handful of notes from reblogging other people's posts#the idea that somehow i'm constructing myself in the cut and paste instead of doing something myself#and i do try to make posts of my own. but nothing's ever worth posting. i don't even let it rot in the drafts. it's just gone#and i try to think about what would stop me from doing this#which inevitably brought me here - what would i be doing if it were fifty years ago#and i think the answer is i'd be calling someone who used to care and blowing up their answering machine#and i think about old answering machines. the ones that need a tape to record the message#does dora just re-record over the tapes that harry fills?#does she trash them? i'm guessing she doesn't listen to them#i won't tell you what to do with this message. i'll spare you a call to action#it's not like a diary would fix this. i have a diary. i've been keeping one regularly for months now#i think i want to be perceived but i refuse to speak unless spoken to and i will not reach out on here unless i'm being a kindly anon#and when i talk irl it's all broken disjointed subjects without predicates#it takes such effort for me to talk that people stop asking me out of kindness. but there's still thoughts i haven't said#thoughts that don't need to be said. we don't *need* another person rambling on about whatever random fandom topic or half-assed scribbles#i tried making serious art and meta posts for like four years across different fandoms#it's all gone now. as is most of my poetry. lotta things i don't know or care to know#and i can't bring myself to do that again. esp if that's not why you're here. so like. it's easier just to remain quiet?#because. i know people *can* understand. but it takes effort#and i can't guarantee a return on investment. i don't know if the cost of teaching me how to talk again is worth it#god i want to infodump but that was beaten out of me. the need is still there but i can't. it hurts#idk. things are good and then things are bad and on the whole they're good and getting better
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9 people to get to know better
tagged by @froggierboy :)
last song: Super Reflector by the Technicolors
currently watching: Adventure Time and It's Always Sunny
currently reading: Nona the Ninth and Red Dragon
current obsession: J. C. Leyendecker
tagging: @jewishbookwyrm, @me-sorta, @emeraldyke, @sarcastic-clapping, @beemotifs, @whimsigod, @metonymph, @holochromatic, @orangejuice-fiction
#no one feel obligated to participate 👍#it's been so long since i've seen/participated in a tag game!#everybody go listen to cinema sublimina right now <3#also if you don't like super reflector i'm begging you to try neon roses#i'm sick over the fact that they aren't touring for the foreseeable future#tag games#it's been fun to finally see the full linear path of adventure time. i only caught individual episodes here and there when i was younger an#some of them were so incredibly fucked up. they remain some of the most incredibly fucked up episodes overall.#struggling to finish iasip. the most current season is gruelling. will likely be substituting it with something.#*actively ignoring the 5 clown movie fics open on my phone for the obsession question. i have not touched them in 2 weeks. but they r there#the leyendecker books i've ordered sit unopened bc i want to finish a book so badly before i crack a new one#can't bring myself to post all the pictures i took on the last day of the exhibit bc i don't want it to be over. keep thinking abt him/them
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ok having heard an idiot woman on the radio saying jk r*wling is only cancelled because "that sells" i'm going to jab a q tip in my ear and die... (:
#and by that i mean i'm going to listen to youth in the shade at top volume in my headphones and stop listening to that idiot#worst thing is because my mom absolutely ADORES jk r*wling i'm sure she's going to agree and i will want to die#i don't think i vibe with my mom siding with a trasphobe insted of her own trans kid....#today started REALLY FUN!#transphobia#i tagged transphobia in case you wanna block it cause i keep censoring the name lol like i do with p*casso#cause i can't bring myself to write it fully kdjhgdg#sorry for putting that name on y'all's dashes#angel talks#personal
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HI!!!!! whilst eating dinner i watched the “once an otter always an otter” number retirement video on youtube and thought “ooh. cool. let me see what people are saying”. opened tumblr. saw your most recent reblog, pressed play. saw DYLAN STROME say the word “davo” and immediately had to pause it lol. put my fork down to boot. like…..flabbergasted. genuinely. man oh man. my goodness. unpaused. the past tense “it was (WAS!!!!) an honor to be your friend” (😧) and the “and hopefully we can make some more [memories] in the future” and the fade to black. SHUT UPPPPPPPPP. OH MY GOD…………….i don’t have anything of substance to add just im sick!!! im sickened!!!!!! it’s never overrrrrrrrrr. absolutely unbelievable!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! frank ocean ivy trust and believe you WILL be looped for the foreseeable future……..they’ll never be those kids again!!!!! and the game’s in a week and a half!!!!!!! gahhhhhhh. nuts crazy bonkers etc etc. going to have an absolutely exceedingly normal one about it for sure!!!!!! hope you have a good one!!!!!!!
also! just for future reference: do you prefer asks of this nature sent to this blog or your hockey one? thank you!!
"Centaur over Tomer Butte" [amended, abridged], Robert Wrigley
you know. i don't think i actually ever registered dylan saying "davo". i think my ears just decided i didn't need to hear that, for the good of my brain to continue functioning. who up having their present haunted by the ghosts of the past who are less like ghosts and more like someone you keep forgetting walked out of the next room but also aren't quite sure if they came back and you've only just worked up the courage to call out to them. schrödinger's best friend who might or might not be there in your future to make more memories with. but at least this time you opened the door and left it cracked for him to crawl back through.
#me when i. when i. like i was looking for a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT POEM to reply because that is unfortunately the arbitrary mechanism#brain decided to employ here and then this one was like NO ACTUALLY i am invading your brainwaves. i wanted to find all my dylan/zach you#you say his name just to keep him for a while longer in your mouth bring more of him into the world poems wherever they went because.#as mentioned. number one actually i will also say i didn't have the sound on for the first few seconds of the video because human error#of needing to hit unmute BUT my brain :) was protecting me :) from having to think about stromer :) davo-ing him :) and i am LOSING IT#idk. idk. poem felt relevant because we were talking about stars & i have very long had a note about connor & orbits even if it's re: leon#and alsO i keep looking at ash's post about a wobbler and his devoted valet because i'm in love with it and it IS them and so i also#immediately went OH MY GOD but that was second the first part was me going “ME BREATHING DOWN HIS NECK FOR A WHILE IN A FURTHER FOREVER”#DYLAN YOU WILL NEVER ESCAPE DYLAN SOME ODD NUMBER OF YEARS OUT STILL TALKING ABOUT CONNOR LONG AFTER YOU'D THINK HE COULD STOP & FORGET and#we were talking about ghosts with bleachers and thinking about like. don't assume ghosts were birthed by other ghosts maybe nothing went#wrong!! the it was an honor to be your friend!! cody's post that was like we all want to know what happened in their friendship and it#sounds like maybe dylan wants to know too! y'all i can't BE HERE there's something percolating and i don't know what it is. smth smth#orion the hunter leon is a scorpio but ALSO i need everyone to understand how complex this square is like i don't hate leon and i need him#to be okay if we have mcstrome & viceversa. anyway i meant the distance between stars forever? OH ALSO I FORGOT TO MENTION ME READING TOMER#LAUGHING LIKE HAHA STROMER right there and then editing the poem so it said stromer & all of you could suffer with me. in a further forever#do u think they promised each other forever when they were kids. do u? do u think the arrow drawn at the heart was one dylan always knew#connor would have to fire? shout out to the verse before that said what lives on that map (charted lightning strikes) never sees the light#& it [s]t[r]omer was significant once before a lava from the west filled its valley in. caved its <3. connor breaking dylan's <3 -> ghost#liv in the replies#anyway made myself more unhinged with the schrödinger's best friend and them missing each other thinking about like. dylan wasn't there fr.#something something time loops and alternate universes i KNOW it's kinda terrible but this is how you lose the time war-esque element#(bc i also just finished reading welcome to forever) of them never seeing each other for real right like. always just an observation. does#he care or does he not. a video of dylan a tweet from connor a text a missed invitation an instagram story the levels of separation and by#god YES i will willfully misinterpret schrödinger & also smtms quantum physics what else do u have a niche interest for. planetary bodies b#ALSO! idrc but yes pls if hrpf related (all side blogs we die like men) send asks over there & maybe i will be more tag story organized#(also while this blog LOOKS more active bc i have a queue for months i am actually more active on the hockey blog lmao) & bc also i want to#share your asks with everyone there. duh. also if i did not tell u already BESTIE THE DMS IF YOU WANT!!! i love receiving asks. u were#already immediately my friend when u sent me one & like. now i would die for u we're having conversations. but if u want a poem send here#p.s. everyone tells me i'd love frank ocean lmao but i haven't listened to him yet for literally no reason. maybe this is the stars alignin
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What if...Ygraine Returns as a Ghost to Care for Her Son
Servant: Sir, I came to inform you that the knights you sent to battle are all dead.
Uther (sitting on the throne, distracted): Well, send their belongings to their families and tell them they were heroes. And bring more cookies, I'm hungry.
Arthur (six years old, watching the scene with distracted eyes next to a very angry ten-year-old Morgana): Good people die young, so when I grow up, I want to be bad like mom. 😌
Morgana: What are you talking about, Arthur! Your mother was a kind and good woman! Where did you get the idea that she was bad!?
Arthur: Yesterday I heard mom say that her dream was for a manure cart to run over dad so he would die once and for all. 🙂
Morgana (eyes wide in complete shock): Your mother would never say such a thing, Arthur… 🫢
Ygraine (next to Uther, trying to strangle him but unable to because she is a ghost): Don't listen to her, baby, mom hates dad and doesn't support anything he's doing! I still can't believe I married this man, listen to what mom says, Arthur, don't follow in his footsteps!
Arthur (turns to Morgana): Mom just said she hates dad, she's also trying to strangle him, but her hands keep going through his body, I think she's a ghost. 🫠 *slowly losing sanity*
Morgana (realizing that the young prince might be crazy): Arthur, maybe she's just joking…
Ygraine (trying to make Uther trip by stepping on his own cape): I'M NOT JOKING! If I could, I would kill him myself! I just can't because I can't touch him!
Arthur: I don't know if the gods would like so much violence…
Ygraine: The gods don't like your father!
Arthur: Okay… 🙂 *takes a cookie from the tray the servant brought*
#merlin#bbc merlin#merlin emrys#merlin x arthur#merlin bbc#merthur#ygraine pendragon#ygraine de bois#ghost ygraine pendragon#arthur pendragon headcanon#arthur pendragon#morgana#morgana and Arthur#bbc uther#uther pendragon#Ygraine bbc#merlin incorrect quotes#incorrect qutoes
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strictly professional
words: 500
warnings: 18+ only, smut, male receiving oral, model!rafe, agent/manager!reader, semi public sex
“im only doing this for you once, okay?” you clarify as you sink down to your knees.
“i can handle it myself.” rafe grunts out.
“except you haven't. i got them to delay the shoot by an hour and you still come out with a boner. if you want to be a successful- and rich- model, you can't act like this.” you take a deep breath as you bring your hands to rafes thighs. “as your agent, im going to help you because im not losing my cut from this shoot just because of your dick.”
you don't give rafe anymore time to argue and pull his pants down to his ankles, taking his underwear with them.
rafes cock springs up, the tip a pinky red that clearly gives away just how long he's been this hard, painfully hard.
you don't give yourself much time to think about it, opening your mouth and dropping your lips around rafe cock. you pause for only a moment to taste him, to flick your head against the leaky slit, before you begin to move.
you only got the photographer and brand rep to agree to an additional thirty minute delay, so you can't spend a minute too long cherishing the moment.
your head starts to rise up and down, almost robotic motions as you repeat to yourself in your head that this is strictly professional.
sure, one of the reasons you got into the model representation industry was to be around hot guys, but you do have a particular knack for management and spotting good potential stars.
you feel rafes hand in your hair, but he doesn't push you down, just an extra pressure to encourage you to keep momentum.
you spotted rafe on vacation in the outer banks, approached him instantly, probably flirted a bit too much, and then handed him your business card. you weren't sure he would reach out, but were pleasantly surprised, clearly enticed by the riches you promised would come his way from his bone structure.
you know his face and body can take him far, if only his body would cooperate. you put all your focus into sucking rafe off.
you listen to his soft sounds, the way his breathing gets loud and almost turns into moans. you wish in that moment you could really hear him, but there's no way with the entire crew just outside of the door.
you feel the urge to gag but swallow instead, trying to keep it down as you feel rafes cock swell inside of your throat, his length somehow seeming to grow only more.
you close your eyes tightly and push your head forward until your nose nuzzles into rafes skin, throat constricting around his cock as he lets out a low curse. you feel the way his hands tighten first, gripping your hair, and then his cock releases.
you wait for the spurts to subside before pulling off, swallowing thickly and trying to avoid coughing loudly.
you look up at rafe, his blissed out face, knowing your jaw is still slackened, eyes filled with tears.
“thanks.” rafe mumbles, his words bringing you back to your senses.
you wipe your chin and stand up, placing your hands on your hips. “get your pants back on, cameron.” you scold him, voice switching back to your typical agent tone. “the photographer is waiting.”
#rafe smut#rafe cameron smut#obx smut#outer banks smut#rafe fic#rafe fanfic#rafe fanfiction#rafe cameron fic#rafe cameron fanfic#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe x you#rafe x y/n#rafe x reader#rafe x oc#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron x y/n#rafe cameron x oc#rafe imagine#rafe one shot#rafe blurb#rafe drabble#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron one shot#rafe cameron blurb#rafe cameron drabble
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hear me out… toge with a spit kink, forcing you to open your mouth and stick out your tongue w his cursed speech so he can spit inside it, he abuses his power to dominate in the bedroom bc he keeps it pent up all day ffkdkskdkska
Listen, friend I hear you but also
I feel like he wasn't nasty AT FIRST. He was way too nervous and shy to do anything too mean; you for sure took his Vcard, so like at first, he was a little baffled, not sure what to do with himself. However, after the drunk!Toge incident....he had ideas. Absolutely nasty, vile thoughts on the regular, but despite his vulgar mouth and asshole humor, he's a sweet boy, so he kept them to himself. That quickly changes, however, when he's knuckle-deep in your pussy, curling his fingers in a way that has you slack-jawed and moaning his name. He can't help the way he stares at your mouth, or more specifically, your tongue. It's so soft and inviting, just begging to be spit on. He momentarily fantasizes about spitting in your mouth and forcing you to hold it there until you cum on his hand, effectively shutting up the cute noises you were making for him, forcing you to taste him the whole time he was rearranging your guts with his much larger hand. He groans at the thought and bucks his hips into the mattress slightly, but he's pulled from his thoughts when you lean up to whisper in his ear, "Tell me what you want....mmm, wan' you to force me...please." All sense of respectability goes out the window in an instant as he's gripping your jaw with one hand while the other one stuffed in your cunt takes on a brutal pace. "Open your mouth," his voice is misleadingly stern, as he feels himself get impossibly harder at the way your jaw hangs slack immediately, tongue sticking out slightly to taunt him. He leans down and spits directly on the surface of the pink muscle before telling you to "Close your mouth and don't swallow." His throat is getting mildly hoarse, but he can't bring himself to care. Not when you look like this, melting under his touch, jaw clenched shut as spit dribbles down the side of your mouth, trying desperately to obey his command.
He was a full blown menace after that, I'm praying for your cewchie
(Anon tbh at first I read this and was like....nah...my sweet boy? no way, buuuuuuut.....honestly......This is incredibly hot and I will be throwing myself out a window
#NERDY BOYS I"M TELLING YALL#pls#oh my god#send me more of these im dying#jjk toge#toge x reader#toge smut#inumaki x reader#inumaki smut#inumaki toge x reader#inumaki toge x you#toge x reader smut#inumaki toge#toge inumaki#toge x y/n#toge x you#inumaki x y/n#inumaki x you#messyhasthots
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oh! Since you also do requests with hybrids, could I ask for wolfhybrids (or fox) hashiras x reader? Like hashiras see the reader as the perfect mate material, so they try to get closer to them by courting them in their own ways
Male Hashira x Reader - Prey tell?
author's note: the title is a pun, my humor is dry. i fell down the stairs and sit in a hospital since yesterday.
pairing: Tengen x reader, Obanai x reader, Rengoku x reader, Sanemi x reader, Giyuu x reader, Gyomei x reader
content warning: wolf!hybrids, a/b/o, kny!au
i've been thinking a lot about this idea now, especially which rank each hashira would have. alpha? beta? omega? it was quite hard, but i allowed myself to create a little au for better understanding.
to not mess things up, i decided that the reader will be an omega in this au. all the hashira are considered alphas, which of course has a reason too.
i've went through the a/b/o thing over the past two or three days and to put it simply: alpha is the equivalent to strong, omegas are weak in comparison.
the hashira are the strongest swordsmen in the corp, it would only be right to rank them as an alpha (or a beta).
you, on the other hand, have been fighting your way to the top. omegas are weaker than most, but you possess a strong mind, which helped you work your way up.
naturally, the day will come that you catch their attention, if only for the fact that you're an omega. i also imagine omegas to be more rare than alphas and betas, since they take on a weaker role in this au.
Tengen:
• he's smitten since day one - an alpha different from any you've met yet. smug smirk and tall body towering over you the minute your scent hits his nose.
• your scent gives him the same feeling the scents of his three wives do. you're so small, perhaps not physically, but your weak omega presence makes his protective instincts flare up.
• just another day or two and three women are by your side, two betas and another omega looking at you with happiness and a feeling of finally coming home.
• you'll learn to love all of them - courting one is courting all. Tengen's not surprised to come home and find all of you nuzzled together in a cuddle pile.
• and if that isn't enough to turn you into a proper mate of his, shiny presents and lots of time squished between four other people will surely do it.
Obanai:
• small and weak. how did you end up near the alphas? he's suspicious when he heard of you, no omega would be able to turn into a hashira. he needed to see that for himself.
• nearly falls off his spot in the tree when he sees you and a comforting scent hits his nose. he's almost embarrassed by the way his fluffy ears are twitching, trying to listen to your conversation with Rengoku.
• he follows you around for a few days, mustering up the courage to talk to you after nearly a week. you looked up when the man sat in front of you, another bowl of food in hand.
• he doesn't talk much, only telling you that omegas should eat more than you do. you awkwardly look at him for a while, taking the bowl after another minute and thanking him.
• the action alone got him blushing under his mask, bringing you food for the next month when he finds you eating somewhere around the training grounds.
Rengoku:
• he's one of the calmer ones when he hears about your rank as a hashira. an omega got ranked this high? what incredible talent you must possess!
• he's by no means against your way of living, but he can't keep his mouth shut about how "you should stay home and get protected by a proper alpha!" it's no insult and you can sense that much, but you find yourself disagreeing.
• once he's sure that you're the perfect material for a mate, he'll court you the proper way, just like his mother once told him.
• it's just that his "proper courting" nearly has you running away in embarrassment.
• "dear [name], allow me to show you my interest through the traditional ways of courting one's future mate!"
• your agreement only came a day later, after you survived his booming voice right behind you in the midst of a forest's silence. next time he shouldn't sneak up on you like that.
Sanemi:
• hah? ridiculous. a small thing like you is supposed to work midst the likes of him? don't make him laugh, he could eat you up for breakfast.
• with that attractive smell reeking from your body, you wouldn't survive a day. he would see you become a demon's snack sooner than later.
• his jaw nearly hits the ground when he sees you outsmart the lower rank demon in front of you with speed and flexibility instead of strength.
• he grumbles about your stupid cute presence, sweetly roaming around him. you're truthfully just going on about your day, but it's enough to make his mind go blank.
• you're the perfect mix of strong and obedient for him, listening so well to him, because "he's done this job longer than you and you were happy to learn."
• internally smacks himself when he tries signalling his courting intentions by gifting you clothes heavily drenched in his scent.
Giyuu:
• he didn't voice his worries, but an omega living this kind of life? any alpha would be worried, right? especially since omegas have gotten so rare these days!
• but, oh, you're so sweet and nice. you once cooked him some soup and he swore you needed an alpha's protection - his protection.
• if he could just steal you away and ensure your safety, but he knew that would make you unhappy. so he makes sure to keep you safe by following you like a lap dog.
• it's not uncommon to see the new omega and the gloomy hashira take a walk together. people tend to avoid you, feeling unwell because of the intense stare the alpha behind you gives them.
• some of them swore they have seen the two of you nuzzle against each other. a hint of his scent had previously started lingering on your uniform too.
Gyomei:
• is it just your imagination or have you been joining missions with the stone hashira more often? no, it's definitely true.
• ever since he has taken a liking to you, he had started courting you by ensuring your safety and happiness.
• he doesn't know a lot about proper courting, mostly because it didn't interest him for most of his life. his courting is really special, but you don't mind.
• instead of bestowing gifts upon you, he takes you to special places he has found, most of them with a unique smell - a waterfall or a meadow full of flowers.
• he tries to gouge your reactions, mostly trusting his ears and tail, because he sadly can't see your beautiful face.
• you find yourself blushing with the way his ears often twitch around you, trying to listen to your every breath and laugh.
• your favourite times are when a protective tail brushes against your back, inviting you into a long session of cuddling.
#kimetsu no yaiba#kimetsu no yaiba x reader#kimetsu no yaiba fluff#demon slayer#demon slayer x reader#demon slayer fluff#kny#kny x reader#kny fluff#kny tengen#tengen uzui#tengen x reader#kny obanai#obanai iguro#obanai x reader#kny rengoku#rengoku kyojuro#rengoku x reader#kny sanemi#sanemi shinazugawa#sanemi x reader#kny giyuu#giyuu tomioka#giyuu x reader#kny gyomei#gyomei himejima#gyomei x reader#kny hashira#hashira x reader#a/b/o
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X Si Volvemos
ex older bf!logan x younger fem!reader
summary: there are many things you and logan disagree in but not when it comes to things in bed.
warnings: 18+ (minors dni), age gap (phew), smut, ex!logan, exes to ????, p in v, creampie, reader's in her early to middle twenties so her frontal lobe hasn't developed yet; don't expect any reasonable thinking on her side, logan is on his middle to late 40s, angst (duh), this happens in an AU where mutants don't exist bc i don't wanna complicate myself with timelines lol hence time isn't really important but it's contemporary, the vibes i bring to the function are more sad than horny and i'm sorry, toxic too! may build a series around it?
word count: 1,925 words
side note: the incredible @bpmiranda's got me with a very bad case of ex!logan fever :( plus after listening to karol G's album mañana será bonito and seeing i may or may not be obssesed with romeo santos, i got the song in the title on loop: as you can see, it's all very fitting ++ don't forget to check out her stories, they're so good istg!!!!
You shouldn't call.
"Logan" you speak. His name burns in the tip of your tongue, like a secret you're not supposed to tell.
He shouldn't answer.
It's quiet at first on the other line, until a rough voice says I'm here, appearing to be distant, but who is he trying to fool? As soon as he saw the number pop on the screen, his fingers moved with a learned urgency.
You shouldn't keep calling.
"I need you" three words to cover those you actually mean; hanging in the spaces between the silence.
I miss you. I love you.
Your hear a heavy sigh on the other end.
He shouldn't keep answering.
"Princess..." Logan pleads, "don't do this"
You know better than that, he wants to say, but keeps his mouth shut. Just to hear your voice, just to-
"Please, Lo" you whine out. Logan grabs his jeans with force, the fabric strained under his white-knuckled grip. It takes him a lot not to run to you right there and now.
"Don't" but his voice cracks as much as his resistance.
"I've got the house" you whisper the prayer; a routine so sacred none of you seem to break it, "just for us"
"Y/n" even saying your name is painful; like the most addicting and damaging drug to ever exist, "stop"
Logan loved your stubborn heart, but there are times where he wishes you weren't like this.
"I'm sorry" and then he hangs up.
I'm sorry for not being who you needed. I'm sorry I pushed you away. I'm sorry I keep on coming back after I said I would leave you alone. I'm sorry I can't keep my promises.
You feel it around your neck―bruises in the vocals your voice has failed to scream; it chokes you with rage.
"Are you stupid?" you ask yourself in the mirror.
What are you doing? Why are you doing this to yourself? Do you love him more than you love you?
You dial again, but this time, it's a girl who picks up.
"Yeah?"
"Hi. Wanna go out?"
Logan feels so out of place, but this used to be your favorite bar, and he's desperate for a drink.
Listening to your voice has always made him weak, but after you broke up, it drives him crazy.
He empties another glass, feeling pathetic. This is how bad it's gotten: you've got him scouring the places you used to go, chasing your ghost, trying to get a glimpse of your silhouette or a whiff of the phantom of your scent, the lavender haunting him; getting under his skin.
A song beggins playing, and it's the same vinyl set from two years ago. The night he met you: a pretty young thing so out of place in an old bar like that, playing hard to get, only to end the night moaning over him, fogging his car's windows, saying his name in a way no one else had before. He still remembers the way your legs trembled but he held you, beads of sweat confusing themselves with the glitter on your skin. Logan doesn't know what that is, but he's marveled, so in awe of you, everything of you: young, new, exciting.
But every new thing wears out, and the gap he swore wouldn't matter came crashing in years that built a distance between him and you.
So he did what he did best: ruin it. Deny the feelings bubbling inside; let them consume his reasoning, pushing you like he had done with everyone who cared about him before.
When he broke your heart, he took a part with him. So you keep coming back, looking for it; trying to piece yourself together. And he let's you: because God knows you have a part of himself too.
He's so drunk he probably imagines the hint of lavender in the whiskey tinted air. He's so desperate to see you again, he's seeing your face among the crowd. He's definitely gone insane: hearing that laugh he misses every day.
"Y/n..."
The music pauses: all you can hear is your name being said in that way like it belongs to him.
"...Logan"
He walks in autopilot over to the table you and a group of girls are sitting. They're all beautiful―beautiful people attract beautiful people, but he's only got eyes for you.
"What are you doing here?"
He raises a glass he didn't know he was carrying, "having a drink".
Your lips purse, and Logan doesn't know if it's because you're laughing at him or sad.
"I see" but you divert your gaze, looking at your outfit's neck. The outfit you chose: a black dress that pushes your tits on top. They are on display, and Logan feels played by you―his eyes trained on the strained fabric, tongue watering like it did when he would lick your sensitive nipples.
"I see too" he says in automatic, and one of your friends laughs. He looks away, thanking the low lights, or you'd see the red embarrassment on his face.
You stand up and walk over to him, and your friends sense it's time to leave the two of you alone.
"Why did you hang up?" you throw the question so casually; the nerve you have.
"What do you mean?" it's the only thing that comes to his mind. Very stupid, indeed.
You scoff, "delete my number, then"
"You keep on calling" he bites back.
"And you keep answering"
You never shut up. He hates that.
"I may have to stop"
You get closer, way too closer. So much, your hot breathe clouds his judgment.
"Try to" you dare.
And he tries, he really tries. But not today.
Not today when he takes you home, finally looking complete with you in it again. You had moved out after your last discussion, saying you'll never be back.
"You haven't changed a thing" you murmur in between kisses, and he can sense a bit of melodrama in his voice that makes him roll his eyes despite the dull ache on his chest.
He picks up your body swiftly, carrying you up to the bedroom.
"Why would I?" he asks, voice so low and small you almost miss it.
"Because you hate me" you avoid his eyes, even if your faces are too close, loosing all that corageous character of yours, "said you would get rid of it; of everything that reminded you of me"
But when he drops you softly on the matress, there's still that lamp you got him in the night table.
"I couldn't" he confesses.
I couldn't, he means, because I couldn't let you go.
But you both know it won't work out, something you knew right from the start: because toxic loves only fulfill basic needs. This isn't healthy, but he forgets it all as soon as you're moaning his name. Still, he promises himself he will say goodbye to you this time, even if it's inside of you.
"Shut up and kiss me, then" you're always pushing him around, making him do the things he desires to but doesn't want to do.
So he obliges, leaning in, the lavender so strong all over your sweet skin, poisoning his mouth on every kiss he leaves. He feels you squirm under him, goosebumps along your skin, prickling against his, so visible he can see and feel it even in the dim lit room.
"Take it" Logan doesn't look at you, but when he does, you feel him stare deep into your soul, "I know you want it"
He's sliding his dick inside you as soon as the sentence is over, the permission to take you and use you implicit. He robs a drawn-out groan out of you.
"So tight for me" he murmurs against your shoulder, sharp breaths and soft groans flooding your ears. His cock hits deep within you, hard thrust no one has ever been able to replicate, making you gasp for air, burying your face in the plush pillows now drenched in your sweat.
"You're so deep" you hiss, hot and overwhelmed, waves of pleasure hitting like water against cliffside rocks. "So big, Lo" you whine, dizzy at the way your pussy stretches for him.
"Just for you" he grunts out, and it's the truth. No matter how dark the room is or how many faces he avoids, he always looks into the eyes of the other women he fucks, his heart sinking when he can no longer pretend it's you, "fuck, squeeze a bit more".
Hearing his deep voice, rough when you fuck, always making you soak, coating his dick in your juices. You grip tight, as tight as the nails that hold onto his shoulders, making him moan at the pain.
"Like that, princess. Good girl" you moan at the praise, "I know you could take me, all of me"
He grunts and pants, holding you tighter as his cock pumps faster, in sync with your now closer to happening orgasm.
Before it, he slows down his thrusts, "where do you want me to cum, princess?"
He wants to, inside of you, but he can't do so, not when he promised he wouldn't ruin your life. But making you his, marking you as only his, makes his dick inside you twitch. Fuck, he's so balls deep inside you all he can think is filling you up silly.
"Inside me, Lo" like you read his thoughts, and it always amazes and scares him; how deep inside his mind you are. Never happened, not in his four decades of life. And that's part of the problem: he's closer to death than you are but it's only with you, young―blossoming with life, that he feels truly alive.
So how can he say no, when you plead and beg with those pretty doe eyes of yours? Who could imagine such a sweet thing to be so needy. He feels like you could ask for his heart, and he'd carve a hole in his body for you―bleeding out of love; dying with a smile.
"Such a greedy little thing, princess" he mocks, but his tone betrays him―dripping in adoration, "want me to fill you up all nice?"
A broken wail is what he takes as your answer, your mind in blank.
He finds himself letting go, way faster than he should; he just misses you and your needy dripping pussy that much. You can't hold back longer either, rush flowing through your veins, much more satisfying than the alcohol you had drank an hour ago.
Logan paints your insides with layers of his hot cum, mumbling a soft:
"Anything for my princess" he keeps going, panting as he's milked entirely dry, "anything you want, my girl"
Your vision is still spotty, mind fogged: you're sure that's the reason the hurt hasn't settled in your heart yet.
Then the silence comes, like it always does now.
"Y/n" you always love when he calls you by your name, but you hate the way he's saying it now. Like a goodbye.
"Don't-" you plead, begging he shuts up. But he pulls out, and says:
"It's for the best"
You don't want what's best. You want him.
"Can't believe you wore this dress" he traces the pattern of the tight clothes, damped in sweat, "you know it's my favorite. Why?"
You fail to supress a smile, even if it's tired and almost sad, "I knew you couldn't say no".
The truth is, you know many things: like how this is never going to stop until it's destroyed you both.
#dilfistquickwrites#logan howlett x you#logan howlett#logan x reader#deadpool and wolverine#wolverine x reader#wolverine smut#james logan howlett#dofp wolverine#old man young girl#logan howlet x reader#logan angst#x men#the wolverine#wolverine angst#xmen smut#logan fluff#logan howlett fluff#logan howlett angst#logan howlett imagine#wolverine imagine#logan howlett fic#logan howlett fanfiction#logan drabble#wolverine drabble#marvel#marvel smut
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Thinking of someone forcing me to touch myself in front of them. Trying to close my legs out of embarrassment just to have them yank them open and tell me they want to watch. Seeing them stare at me intently as they start to touch themselves too because they can't help it. Telling me not to stop, to keep going, because they're enjoying watching me squirm. Begging them to touch me, just for them to shake their head and continue staring. Forcing me to bring myself right to the edge before forcefully pulling my hand away and slamming themselves inside me, telling me as hot as it is to watch me touch myself they want to be the one to make me cum. Pulling my hand back down, making me keep touching myself while they fuck me and slowing down every time I do so I have no choice but to match their pace. Listening to me whine and beg and lose my mind underneath them while they watch me.
@foggyfestdetective
#bd/sm puppy#dumb puppy#nonbinary puppy#puppy sub#puppyenby#subby puppy#daddy’s puppy#enby puppy#puppy pl@y#puppypl4y#puppyboy#puppy space#puppy thoughts#nsft puppy#puppy brain#puppy kink#slutty puppy#sub thoughts#subby thoughts#daddy’s brat#daddy k!nk#daddy's pet#daddy's puppy
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