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transamorousnetwork · 10 months ago

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Trans Women Wanted A Movie About Trans-Attracted Men: They Got One

A big complaint about trans-attracted men has been that they’re too chicken shit to come out and own their trans-attraction. Some celebrities have come out acknowledging their attraction to trans women, or have been outed by others. And, at least several trans-attracted men I know are out loud about their orientation. One wrote a book about his attraction. Another has a book in the works.

Still, the trans community generally has expressed dismay that trans-attracted men remain scared to out themselves. Trans women say if more did, society would accept transgender women more. Some trans women even express interest in someone making a movie about the subject.

Years ago, The Crying Game was that movie. It was pretty good as far as it went.

But Richard Gadd’s Baby Reindeer, which debuted on Netflix last month, took the genre to a whole freaking other level. Trans women got their wish, again.

Let’s take a look at what I think is a tour de force in LGBTQ cinema for many, many, many reasons. Over the next few posts, I’m going to weigh in on this magnificent limited series from multiple angles.

Spoil alerts!

Talking about the show without giving away spoilers would be really tough. In this post, I’ll do my best to avoid spoiling the really good parts. I can’t promise I’ll do so in the next posts. You should go watch it, therefore.

Baby Reindeer features a main character named Donny. He’s a bartender and aspiring comedian. One day a woman comes into the bar. But this is no joke. Donny immediately perceives she’s having a hard time. That woman turns out to be a major stalker who ends up stalking Donny for years. Donny’s relationship with this woman seems like the main plot.

But another one overwhelms the stalker story in my opinion. That one, we discover, is Donny’s trans attraction, how he discovered it and what happens as he tries to overcome his MASSIVE, INTENSE and world-shaping shame and self-loathing.

^^Baby Reindeer: Number one on Netflix. From Actress Nava Mau’s Instagram profile (Photo from Instagram).

It’s a true story

What’s really good about this is Baby Reindeer is a true story. It’s also HIGHLY fictionalized. Still, Gadd, the creator, did a great job fleshing out all the characters, making them believable, nuanced and many-layered. No villains exist here, which is good because villains and victims both are fictions. Everyone creates their reality.

The reason I love that Baby Reindeer is true is that it offers deep insight into the lives of trans-attracted men. Now, not all men who are attracted to trans women are like the guy depicted in the series. Still, of the dozens of men I’ve spoken to or worked with, some things do ring true, things portrayed in the main character’s personality.

At least 60 percent of the men I’ve spoken to or worked with have divergent sexual experiences. Not all of them were “abused”. But many experimented with avant-garde sexual practices. This includes experimenting with male siblings at a young age (which is more common than I thought), fantasizing about sexual acts with their mothers, or even being curious about acts with animals.

At least two of my trans-attracted clients experienced suicidal ideation borne of extreme self-loathing. At a key moment in the series, Donny says he goes through everything he experiences because of his intense self hatred. I’ll revisit the power of self-directed hatred later. It’s important.

The point here isn’t that trans-attracted men are weird or sick. It’s that they came here with a curiosity around a subject most people find so taboo, their beliefs on the subject are intense and likely to trigger harsh judgements. They also cause extreme conservatism towards sex, even though some of those same people who harbor taboo perspectives on these curiosities act out the curiosities themselves. I know this because they often get caught.

Self-loathing common among many

There’s a lot of harsh judgement in Baby Reindeer. Donny does the worst of it, which causes his life trajectory to careen into darkness.

Avid readers of this blog who watch the show will notice that Donny acknowledges as the cause of all the shit that goes down, his extremely intense self-hatred. Again, in one revealing and powerful scene, he admits loving his self-hatred more than anything else, including other people, including himself.

That’s a powerful acknowledgment.

Many trans-attracted men share this powerful hatred. It may not be as intense as it is portrayed in Donny’s life. After all, the story is highly fictionalized. But it’s still there in many trans-attracted men and still intense. That intense emotion always attracts circumstances matching the vibration underneath hatred. And many people have self hatred going on in them. Especially transgender women.

So when watching the show it should be no surprise to anyone that Donny experiences all that he does: failure in his relationship with a cis woman; failure in his dreams to become a comedian; rape at the hands of a male predator; a crazy stalker, and, generally, a fucked up life. It’s all fascinating to watch, painful at times, but so spot on about how the Universe works.

Self-loathing is what makes people “victims”. Remember, there aren’t any victims because people draw to them through their beliefs experiences they live through. “Victims” are vibrational matches to “perpetrators”. Together, they perform a dance, a dance that can destroy and even end in death.

Lives created through self-loathing

Such experiences attempt to alert the person to what’s going on in them. No one can create an experience outside their persistent beliefs. That’s why we encourage clients to clean up their beliefs. Doing so can dramatically improve one’s life experience. Especially in love.

But if a person holds beliefs like Donny does, that person’s experience will look much like the character’s life. The experiences will start as much less intense. Ignored though, and they will increase in intensity. The person will then feel unsatisfied or “unlucky”. In that dissatisfaction, they’ll complain about their life. They’ll see only the worst happening. And in that focus, they’ll invite even more unfortunate experiences.

This often plays out in comments to this blog. I’ll offer absolutely overwhelming evidence the majority of people support trans people, for example, and nearly every commenter will double down on their focus. A focus on things proving their beliefs that the world is against them is “true”. Even though ample evidence shows it’s not.

What those people don’t understand is, that focus is exactly why they experience these experiences. And no one need experience them! Except those who are matches to those experiences.

Getting what they wanted

Baby Reindeer is an amazing movie about trans attraction. And I haven’t even mentioned the spectacular performance delivered by the beautiful transgender actress Nava Mau. I recommend every trans woman watch Baby Reindeer. Every trans-attracted man should too. Maybe those men will see themselves in the Donny character and do something that will help them change their own life experiences.

There’s so much more I can write about this spectacular series. And I’m going to do so in the next post. In the meantime, go watch it. It’s on Netflix.

If you have seen it, share your perspective. What did you think? One client who watched it, watched all seven episodes in one night. Afterwards he could only text me one word: Fascinating.

Transgender women have been asking for a movie like this for a long time. Well, they got one.

#transgender #transamorous #mtf #transattracted #transgirl #transisbeautiful #transsexual #transamorous men #transattraction #transamorous network #baby reindeer

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sequinsmile-x · 2 years ago

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All's Fair - Chapter 6

Emily and Aaron have loved each other since they were children. War might be the thing that finally brings them together, but it could also be the thing that tears them apart forever.

A Hotchniss AU, set in 1917 and beyond.

-x-

Thank you so much for the love for this fic. I cannot believe we are at the penultimate chapter.

I really hope you enjoy this, and would love to know what you think <3

-x-

Words: 5.6k

A list of warnings and tags can be found on the Series Master List

Read over on Ao3, or below the cut

Emily,

I cannot begin to explain how much I needed these last couple of days. Every second was worth the long journey and they will get me through the journey and back and whatever comes next.

It’s strange to know how life has carried on with everything I have seen over there. One day I might have the words to tell you some of it, but for now, just know that you and Mae are the balm I need to remind myself there are good things. That I can be part of something good.

As I write this you are asleep next to me. I can feel the warmth of your skin, and hear the sound of you snoring. (You can’t deny it, you do.) I’ll spend the foreseeable future trying to recreate this feeling, the peace only you can bring me.

I know I’ve already said it, but I want to make sure I’ve written it down. That it’s something you can revisit when you need reminding. I love you, and I am so proud of what you are doing here - the way you are raising our daughter. I hope that she turns out to be exactly like you. And I hope even more that I get to see it.

When I look at her, it amazes me that part of her came from me. That something so perfect can come from someone so broken.

Leaving is something I wish I didn’t have to do. I would give anything to stay here, to finally be the family we deserve to be.

I will do everything I can to come back to you. To both of you

All my love,

Aaron

___

She couldn’t explain it if asked, but it felt worse this time. His departure and the absence that followed sharper, a type of pain that she’d fooled herself into thinking she was used to. She ached with it, her chest tight in a way she’d forgotten it could be.

She slowly paces Mae’s nursery, the weight of her daughter against her chest the only thing that was keeping her together. Mae fusses in her arms, unable to settle in a way that was out of character for the usually calm baby. Emily kisses the top of her head and rubs her hand in soft circles on the infant’s back, whispering gentle words against her little girl’s soft skin.

“I know, sweet girl,” she whispers, kissing her head again, “I miss Daddy too.”

Emily thought that seeing them together, that her brief glimpse of seeing Aaron as the father she always knew he’d be, would help. That it would show her what was to come when she finally had him back for good. But it hurt.

If she closed her eyes she could picture how they’d discovered that Mae found it hilarious when Aaron frowned. The baby’s cheeks stamped with dimples they bickered over, both convinced she got them from the other, as she smiled up at her father, as close to laughter as she ever had been as he tried to hold the frown in place. Emily realises she should have known that it would never be enough, that even if they were lucky and he came back and they got decades together she’d still want more.

She’d grown up reading as many romance novels as she could get her hands on. Not because she believed in it, or hoped for her own happy ending that she never dreamed she’d get, but because they made her world bigger. Her mother had always insisted that Emily was as educated as possible. That she could talk to anyone about anything. It meant she was well-versed in many topics and spoke several languages, but it had never truly been for her benefit. It had been so she could represent the family, so she could attract a husband. Do the duty she had been born into with no choice in the matter. She knew of the world, but hers was small. Reduced to the town she was born in. The house she still lived in.

It felt like there was no small amount of irony in the fact it was now where she was raising her own daughter.

The books she’d read had meant she could go anywhere she wanted. It was only now that she knew the love in them was real. Something she had experienced herself first-hand. She had seen love’s true face. The beauty and the horror of it, sorrow and joy two sides of the same coin.

She feels Mae get heavier against her and she tilts her head to look down, smiling sadly when she sees her daughter is finally asleep. She kisses the side of her head one more time before she lays her in her crib.

“Love you,” she whispers, tracing her fingers over Mae’s forehead before she leaves the room, careful to ensure she pulls the door gently closed behind her.

Emily hesitates briefly before she climbs into her bed, pulling the covers that still smelt like Aaron tight around her, seeking the warmth that she knew she wouldn’t find without him there. She buries her face in the pillow he’d used, hoping sleep would find her as easily as the grief was able to.

___

Aaron,

It feels like an age since I last saw you, but as I’m writing this you are likely not even back in France yet.

The bed still smells like you. JJ keeps trying to change the bedding but I won’t let her until it fades and it just smells like me again.

Mae laughed properly for the first time today. It was beautiful. For the first time since you left us again, I felt truly happy, even if it was just for a second.

Mother is giving me space, and I am grateful for it. She seems to finally understand that I want to do all of this my way. Either that or she feels so sorry for me that she’s just letting it go. I can’t bring myself to care, I’m grateful either way.

I love you. I’m somehow more in love with you now than I was yesterday. And I know I’ll love you more tomorrow.

‘Semper in absentes felicior aestus amantes.’

That means ‘absence makes the heart grow fonder’ if you don’t remember your Latin poetry from our tutor. I seem to remember you and Governness Strauss always being at odds with each other.

All our love,

Emily & Mae

___

She doesn’t know how to feel when she gets her period a couple of weeks after Aaron leaves. A strange mix of elation and disappointment makes her stomach churn with something other than the familiar cramps.

She wasn’t sure she could have handled a second child so close to having Mae. It was something her doctor had warned her about, and her answer at the time had been a wry smile and a quiet reminder that her husband was in Europe. Emotionally she would have struggled too, sure she would have actually had to hire the help she had so firmly denied from her mother for months.

But she can’t shake the feeling that this was it. Her only chance to have more of him, for there to be more of him left in the world in his children. Her heart hurt at the thought of something she’d never had in the first place.

She holds Mae even closer than usual that night, more determined than ever to give her all of the kind of love she wishes she’d grown up with herself.

___

Emily & Mae,

I don’t know what makes it to the news back at home, but things here are, almost impossibly, worse than ever.

I can’t go into details. Even if I found the words this letter would never make it to you if I did, but the small bits of home I have with me are getting me through. I still have the telegram that was sent by Rossi to confirm Mae had been born safely. I have our wedding photo and the photo of the two of you.

I wear the ring you bought me all the time now. I’m not the only man here with one. I think we all see it as a reminder of home. Something we can see that we don’t have to dig through our pockets for. I know you don’t believe in luck, Em, but I’ve come to see it as a good luck charm of sorts. If I make it home, I promise I will never take it off.

I love you, and I’ll try to write again soon.

All my love,

Aaron

___

September 1918

Emily laughs as Mae shifts on the grass, scooting the small distance to her mother’s side, her tiny fists littered with the small petals of a daisy she’d squished as she grabbed it. She presses her hands into Emily’s thigh, pushing herself up as she often tried to do these days, desperate for her mother’s love and attention as she always was.

“Ok I get it, baby,” she says, reaching for her daughter. She picks her up, holding her firmly as she holds her up in her lap, Mae’s tiny feet pressing into Emily’s legs as if she was standing by herself, “Look at you,” she exclaims, smiling widely as Mae giggles, always happy, “You’re standing up. Such a clever girl.”

Mae babbles at her, noises that were so close to Mama it made Emily’s heart ache, and she reaches out for her, leaning in to seek out more of her mother’s embrace. Emily doesn’t hesitate for a second, adjusting her hold on her daughter so she was holding her flush against her chest, not caring for a second about the grass stains that were sure to transfer over to her own clothes.

“You ok, sweet girl?” She asks, even though she knows the 7-month-old cannot respond. Mae rubs her face against Emily’s chest, the usual sign that she was tired. “We’ll go back inside shall we?” Emily says, managing to stand up with her daughter still in her arms, a move she was well practised at, “Maybe we’ll nap together.”

Mae’s response is to cling onto Emily a little tighter, her hand twisting into her hair as it so often did when she was tired. As if she was trying to anchor herself to Emily, still too young to understand that there was nowhere Emily would rather be than wherever she was.

Emily reaches back down for her book and can’t help but smile at the sight of the torn-up daises, the flowers that the baby seemed to love just as much as she did.

“Did you know your daddy used to work here,” Emily says, proud of herself for the way she was able to talk about Aaron without her voice wavering. She struggled if anyone mentioned him to her, but whenever she spoke of him to Mae, which was often, she was fine. As if his existence had been reduced to a secret between the two of them - the people he loved more than anyone else, “He used to make fun of me for liking daises so much,” she adds, kissing the side of her daughter’s head as she starts to walk them away from where they’d been sitting and back to the house, “He’d always said they are weeds. But I think they are beautiful.”

Mae makes a small noise that sounds like agreement, her face still pressed into Emily’s skin, and it makes Emily chuckle. She walks back to the house quickly, determined to get the little girl down for her nap. As soon as enters the house she’s met by Dave, her mother and JJ. All clearly waiting for her and stood in a line. It makes her falter, her hold on Mae tightening slightly as the baby gets heavier in her hold, already on her way to being asleep.

“Emily, where have you been?” Elizabeth asks, an urgency to her voice that makes the hair on the back of Emily’s neck stand up.

“Just sitting outside with Mae,” she replies, looking back and forth between the three people standing in front of her, not liking the kind look on any of their faces, “I’m bringing her in for a nap. What’s going on?”

“Why don’t I take her up?” JJ says, walking toward her and easing Mae out of her arms. Mae fusses a little, waking up slightly as she realises she’s no longer in her mother’s embrace. “Then you can all talk.”

Emily nods, finally tearing her eyes off of her mother to look at Mae for a second, leaning in to kiss her baby’s forehead. “Love you, sweet girl.”

JJ walks away with Mae in her arms, heading for the stairs as she talks softly. Emily looks back at her mother and Dave, and she swallows thickly.

“Why don’t we go into my office?” Elizabeth says, and Dave nods. Emily follows them wordlessly, worse-case scenarios flooding her brain in an instant.

“What is going on?” Emily repeats as they make it into the office. She allows herself to be guided into a seat. Dave ends up next to Emily, clearly there as some kind of moral support, and Elizabeth takes her seat at her desk.

“I received a letter from the head of the team Aaron is on this afternoon.”

Emily’s mouth goes dry, her senses briefly dulled as the words, and their implication, sink in. “What? I don’t understand why would he write to you?”

Elizabeth clears her throat, clearly struggling with the information she’d received herself, a tension in her body Emily doesn’t recognise.

“It seems Aaron had an arrangement in place that any…difficult news would be delivered to me, not you directly.”

“Difficult…” Emily chokes out, her hands tightening into fists in her lap, “No. Please don’t tell me he’s…”

She drifts off, not able to say the words out loud. She feels like she wants to run. All she wants to do is go upstairs and grab her baby and run. But she can’t move, weighed down to the chair by everything she has spent well over a year trying desperately to avoid.

“Captain Gideon’s team were involved in a small operation, and there was an explosion,” Elizabeth says far too calmly for Emily’s liking, her voice a direct contradiction to the way her eyes are shining, “There were six fatalities.”

Emily feels tears pour onto her cheeks, and she doesn’t try to wipe them away, knowing it is pointless, that they’d only be instantly replaced.

“Is Aaron one of them?”

“They don’t know.”

She frowns, her huffing out a sound she can’t identify, “What do you mean they don’t know? How can they not know?” She feels Dave’s hand on her shoulder, a familiar comforting squeeze she’d felt the day of her father’s funeral, but it’s all she can feel, the rest of her body numb.

“There were ten men on the mission. Six were confirmed dead, two returned and two remain unaccounted for. Aaron isn’t one of the two that came back. Due to the…nature…of the explosion, it is unlikely they will be able to identify the dead for some time.”

Emily laughs, and it feels inappropriate, but it’s all she can do. The sound escaping before she can cover her mouth to capture it.

“So, what? We’re just supposed to wait? I’m just supposed to wait to find out if my husband is dead or not?” She exclaims, her fingers twisting her wedding ring around, the small band of metal the heaviest it had ever felt, “He…he wears a wedding ring. That’s not overly common…maybe-”

“Apparently it’s something a lot of the men have taken to doing,” Elizabeth says softly, cutting through her one strand of hope, the thread that had been holding her together.

She can’t place the order of things. Isn’t sure if she breaks first, or if Dave pulls her into a hug and then she breaks, her tears pressed into his jacket as he attempts to comfort her. At some point, she hears the click of the door, her mother leaving her in the presence of the person she’d always sought comfort from over her.

“Everything will be alright, Bella,” Dave says, using the nickname he hadn’t used since she was young. When she used to sneak into the kitchen downstairs, her knees scraped from where she’d fallen when out in the grounds with Aaron and Sean. Dave would comfort her before giving her a piece of candy as he bandaged her up before sending her on her way to her parents.

“How?” She asks, pulling back to look at him, “If he’s dead,” she sobs, the word tasting bitter in her mouth, “If he’s dead, how can anything be alright?”

Dave doesn’t have an answer for her, no words that will bring her comfort, and they sit in silence, the only sound her tears and the clicking of the clock on the wall.

___

Emily thinks it may have been the longest two weeks of her life since her mother pulled her into her office. There had been no news since. No telegrams. No follow-up letters from the commander or from Aaron himself.

Not for the first time since this all began, Emily finds herself furious that the world carries on. Anger she cannot completely contain making her unable to keep still. It felt absurd that the sun continued to rise, that the grass grew and daises bloomed. She couldn’t go out to the grounds anymore, couldn’t look at anything, other than Mae, that reminded her of him. Of what she may well have lost.

She busies herself, desperate to keep her mind occupied in a way other than re-reading the letters from Aaron again. She finds herself in the room that had slowly turned into a library of sorts, organising the books she’d collected over the years. She appreciated the fact it was just hers, something that no one else had really ever had a part of.

There’s a soft knock on the door, and Emily knows it can only be her mother. She sighs and gives herself a moment to prepare herself before she responds.

“You can come in, Mother.”

The door opens and Elizabeth comes into view, “How did you know it was me?”

Emily smiles wryly, “The only people who know I like to spend my time in here are you and Dave, and he always jokes I’m at my most dangerous when I have a book in my hand.”

Elizabeth smiles at that before she clears her throat, “Where’s Mae?”

Emily freezes for a second but carries on putting her books in a pointless pile, not looking at her mother as she replies, “She’s napping. When the house is this quiet I can hear her from here if she cries,” she flicks her eyes over to Elizabeth before she looks back at the books, “Was there any mail?”

“Not today,” Elizabeth replies, watching as Emily visibly deflates. She sighs, intently watching her daughter for a moment before she carries on, “Emily, I think it’s time you accepted-”

“No,” Emily firmly cuts her off, continuing her task of re-organising her books, needing to do something, anything, to keep herself busy. She already knew what her mother was going to say, and she didn’t want to hear it. Didn’t want to be forced to talk about it.

“Emily, I know what it is to lose the person you love. You need to think about it, for your sake and for Mae’s-”

“Don’t tell me what is best for my daughter,” Emily snaps, the book she had been holding dropping down to the table in front of her, the crack of the hardcover against the wood echoing around the room, “And Dad died here, Mom,” she says, choking on a bitter laugh, shaking her head as she throws her hands in the air, “Not in some godforsaken field in France. He died here. And you got to hold his hand and be there. And you got years with him. Not enough, I know, but years. I’ve had days with Aaron. Days.” She stares at her mother, unshed tears in Elizabeth’s eyes and Emily feels her own tears fall onto her cheeks. She wipes them away furiously. “So, excuse me if I refuse to accept it until I have confirmation that he’s dead. Because the thought of it…of him just gone without me getting the chance to say goodbye, without telling him one more time how much I love him,” she shakes her head again, her chin trembling with the force of the emotions she was trying to hold back, “It’s too much to bear.”

“I just think-”

“You paid for that doctor to travel all the way from California because you’d read somewhere that he might be able to help, Dad,” she lets a noise somewhere between a sob and a laugh, unsure herself which one it was, “He was dead by the time he got here,” she shrugs, her shoulders heavy with everything she’d endured for the last year and a half, “How is this different? How is me holding onto the tiny bit of hope I have left any different from that?”

Elizabeth wipes a tear from her cheek before clearing her throat, grief for herself, for her daughter and granddaughter almost enough to choke her. She eventually nods almost indiscernibly.

“I guess it isn’t,” Elizabeth finally says. Emily thinks if things were different between them, if they had the relationship Emily hoped to one day have with her own daughter, her mother would have stepped forward to hug her then. To wrap her in her arms and tell her that, no matter what, everything would be alright. Instead, she stands there, several feet away from her, a sad smile on her face Emily doesn’t remember seeing for quite some time, “I never apologised to you for how I was after your father died,” she says, shaking her head at herself, “I was so…wrapped up in my own grief, in everything I was about to have to do, that I didn’t allow myself to think about the fact you’d lost something too.”

The admission surprises Emily. It was one of the many things they’d never addressed. Something else that had pushed them to where they were now. The strange thing was, Emily had never had more empathy for her mother than she did right now. It wasn’t lost on her that she could already be a widow and a single mother without knowing it, that her wilful ignorance of it until she had confirmation from the army wouldn’t make it any less true if Aaron really was dead. In a cruel twist of fate, she may well have ended up in the exact same position as her mother, albeit much earlier on in her life.

“It’s ok,” Emily chokes out, unsure what else she can say, “If Aaron…I don’t know what I’d do.”

Elizabeth steps towards her and reaches out to grab Emily’s hand, squeezing it in hers like she hadn’t done for years.

“I know that you wouldn’t leave Mae behind in it all,” Elizabeth says, a flash of something Emily would call pride crossing her face as she mentions her granddaughter, “No matter what you end up having to wade through, I know you’ll keep her head above water too. You’re already a far better mother than I ever was.”

Emily doesn’t know what to say, sure that whatever it was would be wrong, somehow inappropriate. She blows out a breath, feeling it shudder as it escapes as if it catches on every rib on its way out. It feels like she has barely any space to breathe, her lungs stuffed full of pre-emptive grief that she refuses to let out.

“Thanks, Mom.” ___

Aaron,

I don’t even know why I’m writing this.

I have nowhere to send it because the one place I know you aren’t is where you should be. Here.

Everyone keeps telling me that I need to come to terms with the fact you’re gone and that I am a fool for hoping for anything different. Hope is as necessary as it is foolish, so I will hold onto it with both hands until someone tells me for certain you were one of the men who died.

I haven’t said this to anyone, because it sounds ridiculous even to me, but I think I’d know if you were dead. I think I’d be able to feel it.

I’ve never really been sure what I believe in. Whether there is a heaven or what comes after this. Good vs evil never seemed as black and white to me as they tried to make it seem in church, especially now after everything that’s happened over the last few years.

But if you’re there, if you really have left us, I hope it’s good. Please wait for me, because I’ll spend the rest of my life waiting for you.

I love you.

Emily

___

October 1918

She stands back as she slides the last book into place, pushing it to level with the others on the shelf.

Shortly after her conversation with her mother, bookshelves Emily hadn’t asked for or ordered arrived and were then built by the estate’s handyman. They were a silent show of support from her mother and she appreciated it.

“Well, baby girl,” Emily says, looking over to where Mae was sitting in the corner of the room, surrounded by her toys, “That’s the last of them.”

Mae smiles at her mother, clapping her hands together, babbling in a way that only Emily seemed to understand.

“I know,” Emily replies enthusiastically as if her daughter had said something interesting, “We’ll get some chairs in here I think,” she says mindlessly, “That way, when you learn to read in a few years we can practise in here together. And when you’re a bit older, you can read whatever you want. Poetry’s always been my favourite,” her smile slips from her face, “Daddy always made fun of me for it.”

There was still nothing, no news or updates that were positive or negative. Elizabeth had even tried to use her connections, something that Emily was grateful for for the first time in her whole life, but there was nothing. Complete silence.

Emily didn’t understand how anyone could simply disappear, or how she was supposed to accept it. She feels all too familiar grief climb up her chest, greeting her like an old friend. She clears her throat, forcing it back down before she looks back at the books.

“Maybe alphabetically wasn’t the way to go,” she says to herself, using the same distraction she had used for weeks in an attempt to calm herself, “The Dewey Decimal system is more modern but-”

She’s cut off by a knock on the door, and she sighs, closing her eyes as she continues to try to calm down.

“I’m not really in the mood for company, Mother,” she says tightly, not turning to look at the door, “Can you come back later?” The door opens anyway and her frustration turns quickly into anger. She whips around, already speaking, “I said I want to be-” She cuts herself off. Her words dying in her throat as their eyes meet. For a moment she forgets to breathe. Everything reduced to just her and the impossible sight in front of her. “You…”

Aaron steps towards her, approaching her tentatively like she was a wild animal, and he stops just short of touching her.

“Hi, sweetheart.”

She takes a step backwards, “No, you’re…this isn’t…” she trips over her words, everything she’d repressed for weeks rising to the surface, overwhelming her, “You were missing. They wrote and said they didn’t know where you are,” she covers her mouth with her shaking hand, just barely catching a sob before it escapes, “I thought you were dead.”

It’s the first time she’s said anything close to it since that afternoon in her mother’s office when she first found out something had happened. Ever since she’d spoken around it, alluded to it in different terms. Worried that if she said it it would make it real. She feels her heart crack in her chest, and she covers her face with her hands.

“Em.” He steps forward and pulls her into a hug, not offended when she tenses slightly, all too aware that her emotions were fraught, “I was hurt after the explosion,” he says, kissing the top of her head as she snakes her arms around him, her body finally catching up with her brain, “I was still mobile and got lost in all the confusion. I ended up in a different hospital from the others. I wrote to you.”

He feels her respond, her words vibrating through his chest, but he doesn’t hear it. He pulls away from her, his hands on her shoulders as he looks down at her.

“Sorry love, I didn’t hear you,” he says softly, removing one hand from her to point at his ear when she looks at him, her tear-filled eyes narrowed in confusion, “My ear was damaged in the explosion, the doctor said I’ll likely never get all my hearing back.”

“I said I didn’t get the letter,” she repeats, her gaze shifting to his left ear. She reaches out to touch it as if she could feel the damage she couldn’t see, “Your hearing…”

“It’s just the left side,” he explains, and she nods, acknowledging she understands, “But it’s enough that the army can’t make use of me anymore.”

She freezes again, her hands grasping the back of his jacket, the scratchiness of the material enough to bring her back to the moment fully for the first time since he walked in.

“You mean…” she drifts off, sure she’s somehow misunderstood, that the universe wasn’t suddenly being kind to her after spending so long being cruel.

“They honourably discharged me,” he says, smiling at her, leaning down so his forehead presses into hers, “I’m home for good.”

She breathes out, her lungs feeling relief in a way she’s sure they haven’t since this all started. Since she’d sat on a bus, a ring on her finger and a baby in her belly that she didn’t know about yet as she watched him disappear from view. She cups his cheeks, pulling him in for a kiss, foregoing any attempt to be gentle.

“I love you,” she says, pulling back just far enough to speak, before she kisses him again, “I love you so much.”

“I love you too,” he replies, his hand buried in her hair, refamiliarising himself with the feel of her, “I’m sorry you were so worried.”

She chokes out a laugh, and she was about to tell him that worried doesn’t even come close to covering it, but they are interrupted by a cry from the other side of the room. Emily looks over, laughing at the slightly put-out look on Mae’s face as she starts to crawl over to her parents.

“Sorry, Mae. We haven’t forgotten about you I promise,” she says, disconnecting herself from her husband as she walks the short distance to their daughter, wiping her tears from her cheeks before she leans down to pick the baby up. She hauls her onto her hip, kissing the side of her head before she turns back to Aaron.

“She’s gotten so big,” Aaron says, smiling at the sight of his girls together, “She’s beautiful.” He can’t believe how much she’s grown, how different she looks from the last time he saw her. If he thought she looked like Emily back then, she certainly looks more like her now. He tries to ignore the pang of hurt as Mae shies away from him when he reaches out for her, burying herself further into Emily’s side.

Emily wipes fresh tears from her cheeks, sure she’d never stop now she had started “She’s ok, she’s just a bit shy around…”

She stops herself, cutting herself off before she says something that could upset him. Aaron smiles tightly at her.

“Around strangers,” he finishes for her before he wraps his arm around her.

“You’re not a stranger,” Emily says, leaning into him, not wanting to be anywhere other than with him anytime soon.

“I’ve missed a lot,” he laments, watching how Mae watches Emily, all of her focus on her mother as if she’d somehow inherited his love for her despite the fact she’d never really seen it in action.

Emily presses a kiss to his cheek before she pulls back to look at him, keen to make sure he hears her.

“You’re here now,” she says, smiling widely at him, “There will be plenty to see and do together.”

Aaron nods, pulling her into his chest, grateful when Mae doesn’t seem to mind being close to him as long as Emily is too. He kisses the top of his wife’s head, breathing in the scent of her, filling his lungs with it. Letting it replace everything that had taken residence in his chest since they had last seen each other. It finally sinks in that he’s home. Because home had never been the Prentiss’s estate, or the tiny house he used to live in on it.

Home had always been her.

“We can do everything.”

-x-

Tag list:

@ssa-sparks, @lukeclvez, @lyds102, @glockleveledatyourcrotch, @hotchnissenthusiast, @danadeservesadrink, @ssamorganhotchner, @emilyprentissisgod, @notagentprentiss, @freesiasandfics, @emilyshotchniss, @thecharmingart, @paulitalblond, @hancydrewfan, @camille093, @whitecrossgirl, @moonlight-2-6, @rawr-jess, @florenceremingtonthethird, @jareauswife, @ms-black-a, @beebeelank, @aubreyprc, @zipzapboingg, @psychopath-at-heart, @criminalmindsgonewrong, @fionaloover, @kinqslcys, @prentissinred, @ccmattis22, @denvivale317, @thrindis, @hotchsguccitie, @cmfouatslota77, @alexblakegf, @aliensaurusrex, @prentissxhotch, @emobabeyy, @victoiregranger, @stormyweatherth, @wanderingdreamer009, @ssablackbird, @luhconh, @lex13cm

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#hotchniss #hotchniss fanfiction #hotchniss fanfic #emily prentiss fanfiction #aaron hotchner fanfiction #aaron hotchner x emily prentiss #hotchniss fan fic #aaron x emily #hotch x prentiss

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florilegiumofblips · 10 months ago

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This year has been a series of small heartaches.

I’m not supposed to say that.

I’m supposed to say that everything is fine.

And it is. Surprisingly, miraculously, it is.

I am, for the most part, treading water quite well, actually.

But in the black-and-white-terror by which we often judge our lives, it has been a spectacularly crummy year. I say that knowing full well that everyone I love has their health and because of that my complaints are just that: complaints, and so not worth much.

But today I will have a second latte before I even leave the house.

The weight of some-other-life has been pressing in heavy of late. I feel it most acutely in grocery stores. Standing in aisles, the food poorly organized, the lighting harsh, and the people who work there as unhelpful as unwilling. I feel it standing in the checkout lines. The person behind me always a little too close—their items being scanned before I’ve even signed my copy of the receipt.

And I can’t help but think how those things wouldn’t happen in cities with more space.

Which may or may not be true.

But it’s true of where I grew up.

I feel so very much in-the-middle-of-things. And also nowhere at all. Which is a different sort of middle, and not a very good one.

Except that I’m not in the middle.

I’m on the other side of a long stretch of heartache.

So much, am I on the other side, that I occasionally forget. The body is adaptive in that way—protective. How expertly it smooths the edges of what once felt impossible. But every once and again a residual truth will surface and I’ll realize there’s more to go—small mountains still to move.

And miles to go before I sleep. And miles to go before I sleep. *

Somewhere along the way I stopped believing that good things could happen to me.

Somewhere from within the tangle of that particular devastation I stopped trusting that good things do in fact…occur. To other people, surely. But not to me.

My life would be something else entirely. Something less. And I would weather it.

It’s so ridiculous. I get that. Just saying it out loud, it’s so ridiculous. But it’s also true. And true in a way that frightens me because it’s somehow more true than other truths, and how can there be shades to truth?

And what I’m realizing is that I’ve been toting around this particular truth for far too long, totally unaware.

Meaning, I’ve let it be true. When really it’s not. And that’s on me.

Maybe it’s the last threshold. The last little bit to cross.

But when you’re nineteen years old and shit hits the fan in that way that alters your life in that unalterable way and it takes you seven years just to get out of bed without considerable effort, perception and hopes and what you want for your life shifts.

And you settle.

For less.

And you accept that less for so long that it becomes a new baseline.

Until you call bullshit. And start wanting—start expecting more.

Because just to give voice to that scary truth is to dismantle it. To somehow make it less true.

Less true than other truths.

And less important and more part of the past--and the mountains get smaller and the miles less dense.

And the getting out of bed, that much easier.

Treading water starts to feel more like swimming.

Forward to that next shore.

Something about water metaphors, they really get me.

*Robert Frost. Obviously. (Obviously not being the name of the poem. And now is the moment I encourage you to go revisit his really good words.)

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esther-dot · 11 months ago

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I don’t think Jon and Sansa will get an ideal ending either, but at the same time, I think Sansa will at least marry Jon secretly because this moment—

Reads like this to me:

In which the voices of her abusers tell her to despair, and she does, only for the reader to realize (and Sansa too, eventually), that they’re wrong. There are heroes:

And of course, we have Brienne telling us there are true knights as well. I have to think, if Martin wrote into AGOT that moment only to specifically refute that fear later in the series, he’s likely written Sansa’s other low-point into the series with the same intent--to restore her faith/hope. To me, that speaks to Martin's plans for Sansa, and is one of the strongest arguments for canon Jonsa.

It could be a rushed marriage, before war or before Jon goes South, or a secret wedding since Sansa is technically still married to Tyrion, but I think there's good reason to believe that line is set-up for a later plot point.

I would also argue that just as Jon is presented with the opportunity to marry Val to unite the North with the FF, only for us to know that he has developed an understanding of the FF, to watch as the FF swear loyalty to him, to see the potential for him to be the means to maintain peace, I'd say that is likely being matched with what is happening in the Eyrie ie Sansa winning loyalty there from Royce who recognizes her, and from Robin who is obsessed with her. In fact, I'd say securing the alliance via a marriage would undermine this passage:

Last of all came the Royces, Lord Nestor and Bronze Yohn. The Lord of Runestone stood as tall as the Hound. Though his hair was grey and his face lined, Lord Yohn still looked as though he could break most younger men like twigs in those huge gnarled hands. His seamed and solemn face brought back all of Sansa's memories of his time at Winterfell. She remembered him at table, speaking quietly with her mother. She heard his voice booming off the walls when he rode back from a hunt with a buck behind his saddle. She could see him in the yard, a practice sword in hand, hammering her father to the ground and turning to defeat Ser Rodrik as well. He will know me. How could he not? She considered throwing herself at his feet to beg for his protection. He never fought for Robb, why should he fight for me? The war is finished and Winterfell is fallen. "Lord Royce," she asked timidly, "will you have a cup of wine, to take the chill off?" Bronze Yohn had slate-grey eyes, half-hidden beneath the bushiest eyebrows she had ever seen. They crinkled when he looked down at her. "Do I know you, girl?" (AFFC, Alayne I)

which leads us to think the idea will be holding up the significance of Sansa, even though she has no expectation of it, not the dude she marries. I think that pertains to fighting forces as well as food, and that's before we get into the Jonsa implications of this passage:

Our best hope may be the Eyrie. The Vale of Arryn was famously fertile and had gone untouched during the fighting. Jon wondered how Lady Catelyn's sister would feel about feeding Ned Stark's bastard. As a boy, he often felt as if the lady grudged him every bite. (ADWD, Jon IV)

I did want to add something about songs/Martin’s love for tragic romances, but while I transcribed his comments on that once I can’t find it rn so I’ll have to revisit that later.

How Jonsa will happen?

Most likely like Sansa predicted, in Book One:

"I love him, Father, I truly truly do, I love him as much as Queen Naerys loved Prince Aemon the Dragonknight, as much as Jonquil loved Ser Florian. I want to be his queen and have his babies."

In Case no one knows it, these love stories are inworld Songs about tragic and unfulfilled Love. Naerys was the Wife of Aegon IV and gave him Children, although she loved their Brother Aemon (according to this Song) and Jonquil and Ser Florian are Songs which are described as Sad in AFFC. So when Sansa says this in Book ONE, she thinks she is in Love with Joffrey, but given her relatively naive Outlook on Life, I would say she is more in Love with the thought of being in Love than with Joffrey.

I expect Jon and Sansa to happen with the realisation that their Love is not for the Best, in the middle of Winter, during a Food Crisis, with the Others on their Way, etc. And that won't miraculously change. And no, Daenerys won't be the solution to that problem, because what Jon and Sansa need is Food and/or Money, Daenerys has neither. So the best and easiest solution would be Marriage. Sansa marrying someone who can solve their problems, either someone with Money or someone with Food. The ideal would be both but in Westeros, there are either People indebted or soon will be indebted because Food will be needed and most likely will be bought.

And Sansa will marry someone, with one of these Things (I expect Littlefinger will be long dead by that point, so no luckily for all of us, this Creep won't be it) If Littlefinger dies without issue (because Sansa is revealed as Sansa stark and not Alayne Stone), it is most likely that Sansa will marry Sweet Robin, because, I think Harry the Heir will die, but Sweet robin will survive (mostly because Robin is the Reason that Baelish has Power in the Vale, not the Harding-Boy)

And because the Wall will be totally destroyed and never be rebuilt, Jon won't be at the Wall at the End of this Story, he most likely will become either Sansa's or Rikkon's Sworn Sword something similar to a Kingsguard. And what that means, I won't describe, but it will be very bitter-sweet. And Sansa will be in Love unfulfilled and married to someone else. And Jon will have his family back and only father Bastards, the very thing he never wanted to do.

#book jonsa #asoiaf speculation #long post #secret wedding

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oetravia · 3 years ago

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Every Brainia Scene Ever: 6x20 [12/12]

#supergirl #supergirledit #dctvedit #arrowverseedit #brainiaedit #brainiac 5 #nia nal #in all honesty the only thing I’d change about this would be to have them sitting closer - a repeat of 422 would’ve been great #it’s just seems a shame to not have them sickeningly loved up one final time but c’est la vie #they’re adorable all the same so it doesn’t really matter - I mean just look at them 🥺🥺#plus we FINALLY got Brainy at a game night in S6 so I’ll take the loss just this once!#(but can I just ask the question…if Kara’s come out as Supergirl doesn’t that put pressure on the rest of the superfriends to do the same?#I mean Nia openly used her powers at Dansen’s wedding and Brainy’s green full time so it’s a poorly kept secret #but it’s the principle - especially for Dansen who don’t actually have any actual powers #anyway it doesn’t make much difference but you do have to wonder about the wider impacts of such a high profile hero #revealing their identity for everyone else - especially now everyone in the Arrowverse exists on the same Earth)#I can’t wait to see what’s next for these two - clearly Nicole has plans for Nia and hopefully Brainy will factor into those somewhere #along the way (after the graphic novel which doesn’t sound like it would make sense for him to pop up there)#I can’t believe this is the last one in this series (I’ll be revisiting it if we get deleted scenes but still)#what a journey thanks to everyone who has reblogged or liked any gifset along the way #and special thank yous to the ones who have liked/reblogged every set - I’ve noticed 🥰🥰#mine #my gifs #otp: what does love feel like?#*ebs #(I’m stupidly emotional now so 😭✌️)

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fill-me-with-your-memes-daddy · 4 years ago

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Watching the Rise of the Titans movie and I'll be documenting all of my thoughts/reactions here. [Spoiler Warning]

So instead of reblogging every new update, I'm just going to have this post up on my phone as I watch and type my reactions in a bullet list format.

Nari's human disguise is so cute. As someone who does have a cottagecore aesthetic, I want to cosplay her so bad

Are Skrael and/or Belroc non-binary coded? Regardless, I'm also obsessed and I want to fuck Skrael and be Belroc.

STEVE CARING ABOUT JIM BEING HURT YESSSS!!! My god his redemption has probably been one of the greatest there is because he doesn't just suddenly go from being a bully to a completely good person. You can see the gradual shift in learning better throughout the shows which is awesome.

IN NEW YOOOOOOORRRRRRRK!!!!!! CONCRETE JUNGLE WHERE DREAMS ARE MADE OFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!

The mugshot montage reminded me of season 1 of trollhunters when toby and Jim were arrested at the museum.

STRICKLER PUT A RING ON IT??? HE'S THE ONLY DILF IVE EVER ACTUALLY AGREED WAS HOT WYM I CAN'T HAVE HIM??? well I'm still really happy about his arc over the series probably one of my favorite character growths.

Eli my guy got his growth spurt!!! As an 18 year old who is still 5'0", I'm happy but envious for him

So I went into this movie without watching any trailers or promo, but I doubt anything could have prepared me for the existence of mpreg. In fact, I wasn't going to document my reactions until I saw that.

NAMURA!!!!!!!!! MY BELOVED!!!!!! I CAN STILL THIRST FOR YOU WITHOUT GUILT

The coach teacher just called the kids zoomers so I have to dock one point from my final rating just because of that. Unforgivable

Those husky animation models suck lmao

Oh fuck the titans got power ranger zords!!

God why did they include the mpreg??? This movie would have been perfect without it.... After that plot point being revisited only one time I'm already beyond done with it

Like it's bringing me back to the v*ltron days where they're was a suspiciously high amount of klance omegaverse and mpreg fics and art created and it physically hurts because Steve and Keith's voice actor is the same person meaning this is especially cursed to me since I was unfortunately in the v*ltron fandom and remember all of that

But like on another note, how old are these characters again??? I haven't checked any wikis because of spoilers but is Steve an adult??? I know aja might be technically a lot older than 18 because alien but is whatever age she is equivalent to an adult as far as emotionally and physically in Akaridion development??? IS THIS A TEEN (M)PREGNANCY IN A KIDS SHOW????

Like bruh I saw a singular post on here before going into the movie that was like "rott spoilers without context" and there was a pregnant belly but I was absolutely not expecting the actual context of it. I'll find the post after I finish and edit this post to tag the creator right here: @makoden

This entire post is just gonna be me ranting about mpreg huh

Anyway I love the whole roundtable allusion to the legends of king arthur (not the toa version but the one he's based off)

THERE'S 3 TO 5 BABIES????? I need to take a break bruh this is just too much

Alright I've taken a 30 minute break got some food and did some things i love (decompressed by tactile stimming with some owl plushies and watched some videos on my favorite owl, Garu. He lives in Japan with his owner and is a domesticated eagle owl who basically just acts like a sky cat. If anyone else needs some eye bleach, here is their YouTube channel)

Blinky and ARRRGHHH!!! saying their "if one of us doesn't make it" talk my god one of them is going to die I can see it and I will be utterly crushed. Jim can't lose another father figure and Toby can't lose his wingman again I will riot if this happens

On a similar but unrelated to the movie note, can we just talk about how toa started with Jim having 0 dads and (if strickler and blinky live to the end) will end with 2 dads? Like I just really feel happy for him that he has two dads who actually figured out how to put the past behind them to not have any infighting between them so that both of them are healthy father figures. Jim has already been through literal hell and back losing his actual humanity in the process so if he loses one of them, I'm going to be really pissed because at this point, this is just Jim torture porn. Y'all know how as SpongeBob SquarePants went on, the show just became Squidward torture porn? It's starting to feel that way for toa and I really hope they cut the shit by the ending

Jlaire is such a good ship but like I feel like it's too perfect they never disagree with each other

YESSSSSSS Someone finally doesn't treat toby like a fat waste of space who messes stuff up!!! I think out of all the characters that would have been most deserving of a rewrite, it's Toby. Sometimes I just feel he's only comic relief and any heartfelt moments he's had in the series was also born of stupidity (ie his flour baby project being unharmed was seen by him as divine intervention from his parents but was actually just Eli and Steve behind the scenes).

Ohhhhh yesssssss Archie's father!!! I was hoping I'd see him again because we got so little of him last

Ooooooooooh Asian trollmarket!!!!!

Oh never mind slavery trollmarket

Bruh titanic camelot

I feel like we're not seeing enough of the villains because I completely forgot about the power ranger zord things

NAMORA NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MY LAST CRUSHHHH

STRICKLER NO NOT YOU TOO PLEASE

WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE ONLY TWO CHARACTERS I SIMP FOR ON THIS SHOW DIED WITHIN FIVE MINUTES OF EACH OTHER

THAT WHOLE ASS RANT I WROTE IS COMING TRUE FUCK THIS MOVIE THIS SERIES IS JUST JIM TORTURE PORN

WAIT JIM'S SPERM DONOR INFO?

Oh thank God I don't want to know anything about that person

For the record, I call that man Jim's sperm donor because he has no business being called a father to him. All he did was donate some swimmers to the creation of him and give him abandonment issues

Oh another blind troll elder???? This fucker is just if vendel was a bad guy

Bruh I was grieving

PACIFIC RIM WITH GUN ROBOT VEX AND THE BELROCZORD? I've never seen that movie but I know the reference

Bruh Blinky doesn't read horoscopes? Does he realize conspiracy theories are just the manly version of horoscopes?

NO DON'T KILL VEX STOP KO-ING FOUND FAMILY MEMBERS

Oh thank God he's okay

NO NOT ARCHIE AND CHARLEMAGNE OH MY GOD

oh never mind they're just gonna coup de tat I believe in them :))

But I want to see him again

But I'm glad to see vex

Yay they're in arcadia!

But yeah I wondered why the trolls and Merlin didn't keep the whole "daylight doesn't hurt trolls" feature from the eternal night but now Guillermo del Toro I see you were playing the long con in that just to kill my girl Namora :(((

Oooooh I love the animation of the Narizord over Chihuahua!! It looks very good and realistic (if only they could have put some of that into those huskies from before smh)

Bruh the character designs of the arcane order are so good I want to be them

Nari making sure the Skraelzord doesn't crush the bus

DAMN DOUBLE HOMICIDE

Bruh I'm just glad we finally have an answer on why arcadia had everything going on as opposed to literally anywhere else!! I always found that as a weird coincidence for plot convince.

BRUH WERE BACK TO THE MPREG IM SO JEALOUS I FORGOT ABOUT THAT EVEN THOUGH IT WAS BECAUSE I WAS GRIEVING THE LOSS OF MY LOVELIES.

Oh that's real convenient that the ninth configuration meant all of them. Way to not decide which character gets more attention. Though it probably was a smart way to not have any infighting in the fandom between each character's stan group.

Bruh I just realized where is Barbera did they just ditch her on the Camelot ship???

And where are the other trolls that migrated at the end of trollhunters s3? They said something about new jersey but obviously Jim and the other main characters got on Camelot instead.... This feels like a plot hole

And we never learned the process of how changelings are made and bonded to humans and stuff. We just know it's super painful but I'm curious ffs!!!!

THE DONT THINK BECOME HERO SPEECH ALL SAID TOGETHER!!!

BRUH THEY REALLY HAD TO SHOW HIM GIVING BIRTH??????? WAS THAT AN ABSOLUTE MUST??????

Plus the main audience for this series is little children (the rating for the movie is literally TV-Y7) so even though my adult ass is not in the target audience, I STILL DONT UNDERSTAND WHY WOULD MPREG AND ANAL BIRTH WOULD BE AN IMPORTANT THING TO 7 YEAR OLDS???? THIS IS A LITERAL FETISH HIDDEN IN KIDS CONTENT ITS ELSAGATE ALL OVER AGAIN Y'ALL 😭😭😭😭😭

Though it's probably hypocritical of me to think fetishes don't belong in kids tv when I've openly admitted to thirsting for strickler and namora

HUZZAH

NEW AMULET WAZ GOOD????

STAB THAT BITCH JIM

WAIT NO I SAID STAB NOT GET STABBED

Alright good job just missed the directions at first but you fixed it

SEVEN KIDS?????????

T O B Y ????????????

W A I T NO

N O

IS HE ACTUALLY

OH MY GOD THERE'S HOPE

NO THERE ISN'T

F U C K THIS SHIT THEY REALLY JUST HAD HIM TO BE BULLIED THEN KILLED

Y'ALL IM ACTUALLY CRYING THIS NEVER HAPPENS

I NEVER ACTUALLY GET SO EMOTIONAL OVER MEDIA THAT I CRY IT ONLY HAPPENED ONCE AT THE END OF VOLTRON BUT AHHHHHHHH

W A I T

HE'S GONNA BE BROUGHT BACK?????

HOLD UP THEY'RE JUST GONNA BRING ALL THOSE DEAD PEOPLE BACK??????

WAIT IS HE

BLINKY CALLED HIM A SON

HOLD ON IS THIS GOING TO BE A CLIFFHANGER???????????

BRUH THEY REALLY JUST CAN'T END THE SERIES WITHOUT CLIFFHANGERS like there's always an open ending

TROLLHUNTER TOBY????? You know what forget the whole rants I had on how toby was written they just redeemed it all

And that's all! I'd rate it a 6.5/10 because it's definitely the weakest of all the sequels but still had amazing animation and some good plot points. It's just really hard to look over the bad stuff enough to rate it any higher.

#tales of arcadia #rise of the titans #trollhunters #rott #rise of the titans spoilers #rott spoilers #toa #3 below #athena's own original post!#jim lake jr #claire nuñez #toby domzalski

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belovedmuichiro · 3 years ago

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Ever since your post earlier I’ve been wanting to ask you for any headcanons but my mind is all empty and I can’t come up with anything specific to ask about😫 But I like reading your thoughts and ideas, do you have any you haven’t shared?

Oh thank you so much!!! I love when I see you in my notifications ☺️

Man… I have a lot of things I could talk about so maybe I’ll just make a little list here and revisit it eventually lol

Demon Tanjiro and Inosuke au. It’d be a lot like most demon Tanjiro aus but Inosuke is also a recently turned demon thanks to Douma who “raised” him (his mom is still dead tho, sorry, but that would be relevant later in the au). My thinking is that Inosuke is meant to be hunting the demon who broke away from Muzan’s control, but is infatuated with Tanjiro who is stronger and more powerful than he is. I have a lot more thoughts about this but this is the basic outline for that au!

I’ve mentioned it but Demon Slayer!Ubuyashiki daughter and Demon Slayer Muzan!child aus. I always liked the idea of one of the Ubuyashiki daughters breaking away from their role to fight because they’re vengeful over what demons have done to their family, and a child of Muzan learning that they’ve been deceived their whole life to believe he’s their father and trying to prevent that from ever happening again. I made a post about this but I decided if I elaborated on this au, I’d want them to be the same au and have the two of them be friends and set up that whole angst train.

Anything Nezukana honestly, such an underrated ship. I want to write another fic for them, but I’m still getting back into writing rn so we’ll see 😅

A Yuichiro lives au! I’ve actually made a post about this but I never did a part two even tho I’ve kind of worked out a lot of it in my head. I just want the Tokito twins to be happy okay??

Yoriichi stuff in general :) but especially Yoriichi/Sumiyoshi/Suyako. I know they’re all side characters but I love them all and I love showering Yoriichi in affection :’)

I want to elaborate more on Muichiro’s little friend group of Genya, Kanao, and Senjuro because I think they’re the emo version of our main characters and that’s funny to me. Senjuro is like the kid who isn’t allowed to dress edgy, but tell me it wouldn’t be funny to see Senjuro dressed up all dark and brooding but he’s the sweetest guy ever so he’s just smiling so earnestly. I love it

And last one for now, a Renkaza fic about Akaza’s moments before turning human again, as well as a sick fic I already started including Senjuro who’s getting tired of his brother’s boyfriend’s shit. I hope I can finish that one because honestly it’s funny to me

Thank you for asking! Sorry it’s a little long lmao I just love everyone in this damn series

#emmie speaks #micaron #I actually came up with that demon Inotan idea pretty quickly #I kinda like it I should elaborate on that #kny manga spoilers

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marchtomydrums · 3 years ago

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Beautiful Creature 9

Olivia Benson X Reader

Rated M

* I believe this is the end for this series. I may revisit it later on and make another part. Hope you enjoyed it. If there is anything you'd like to read or see from me let me know. *

Over the next couple of months the three of you meet up to sleep together and most nights Alex ended up staying the night. Some nights sex wasn’t involved it was about coming home to each other. Noah has even come accustomed to seeing Alex and spending time with her. He adores her and their relationship warms your heart. However, it also scares you too. As much as you enjoy Alex being here you’re scared that one day it will end and by then you’ll be fully invested. The idea that Noah could become so attached to her only to lose her breaks your heart.

That night you come home to Olivia cooking dinner and Alex is in the living room playing with Noah. Noah spots you first taking off to meet you at the door. The little boy jumps landing in your arms.

“Hi, baby! I missed you so much today. I’m sorry I couldn’t pick you up from school.” You tell him kissing all over his face.

“It’s okay mommy. Lex picked me up!” He says joyfully.

“She did?” You ask him with a smile on your face. You look over to see Olivia and Alex watching you from opposing rooms.

“Yeah, Liv said you had a meeting and she was busy so I offered. I hope that’s okay.” She asked hesitantly.

“Of course it is. Thank you.” You smiled. Walking into the kitchen you wrap your arms around Olivia kissing her.

“Hello, caption. “

“Hello, my love. Dinner will be ready soon.” She says smiling.

Nodding you said okay walking to the bedroom.

“Hey, Alex? Can you come here for a moment to help me?” You asked disappearing not even waiting for an answer. Alex looks over to Olivia concerned but follows you into the bedroom closing the door behind her.

“Y/n if this about me picking up Noah I didn’t mean to overstep. I was just helping out.” She barely got the words out before you cut her off pushing her body up against the door kissing her. She moans into your mouth pulling your body against hers.

“Hi.” You whispered pulling back.

“Hi.” She chuckles.

“I don’t care that you picked Noah up I just wanted a minute with you alone.” You tell her.

“Oh. Okay. “ she chuckled.

“We haven’t discussed showing affection with you in front of Noah so I figured this was a better idea. “ you chuckled kissing her once more. The kiss lasted for a few minutes before you pulled back to breathe. Trying to steady yourself you rested your forehead against hers.

“I want you.” You whispered to Alex. She giggles “I know baby but we can’t right now.” You groaned pulling away from her pouting.

“I guess I’ll change for dinner.” You mumbled. Alex laughed grabbing your hand pulling you towards her before laying a kiss on your lips.

“I promise you can have me tonight once Noah is asleep.” She said against your lips. You smiled giving her one last kiss before changing your clothes.

The two of you headed into the kitchen Noah asked Alex if she’d help set the table with him. Olivia smiled watching the two move about the room together like they’ve done it for years. The three of you worked as a team getting Noah bathed, lunch packed and tucked into bed. It’s a routine that’s been happening over the past couple of weeks.

Multiple rounds later the three of you lay naked next to each other in bed. Olivia holding both of you close on either side of her as you and Alex tangle your fingers together across her chest. Nothing was said just smiles, kisses, and heavy breathing. Once everyone’s body cooled off you decided to bite the bullet.

“That felt different right? I mean we’ve had sex before but that was different right? “ you asked them. The two of them looked at you before nodding their heads in agreement.

“It was different,” Alex whispered brushing the hair out of your face. You smile leaning into her touch. Sighing you look up at Olivia “liv, how do you feel?” Olivia is quiet for a moment before she speaks “I think that I have waited my whole life to have you both in my arms, in my bed, and in my heart. I am willing to try this for real if you two are. “

“Really?” You and Alex both asked at the same time.

“Really. I love you both so much and I don’t want to lose either one of you. And Noah loves having all three of us here. I think this could work.” She says. Smiling you lean over to kiss her.

“I love you so much liv.”

“ I love you too baby.” She tells you smiling. You smile before looking over at Alex with a questioning look “Alex?”

She smiles “ My whole life I’ve waited for a place to call home. Even when Olivia and I were together I still waited. This..this is home. “ she says through her tears. You smile before placing a kiss on her lips which she returns before she leans down to kiss Olivia.

“Then it’s settled. The three of us are in this for the long haul. Now, let’s sleep because you two wore me out.” Olivia chuckles pulling you both into her laying a kiss on both of your heads. You smile to yourself bathing in the feeling of warmth and love. As you lay there trying to sleep you replay Alex’s words. Realizing that you have waited your whole life to find a home as well. A place where love, laughter, and joy live. A place where you feel loved, secure, and wanted. This is home.

#lgbtq #law and order svu #olivia benson x reader #wlw #fiction #three women #age difference #law and order x reader #television #writing #mariska hartigay #alex cabot x reader #sex on the brain #stephanie march #noah benson #smut and fluff

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sitaarein · 3 years ago

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None Stand Equal In This Dark World

A/N: Officially my largest ever fic so please. Just read it and be nice sob because I’m kinda proud of some of it

Written for @grishaversebigbang 2021!!!

Corporalki: @homicide-depot

Materialki: @generalnabri (x), @kolarpem (x), @aivicart (x), @maximumbluebirdpatrol , @niadrawing (x)

(Summary: A murder mystery AU featuring Zoyalai, twists and turns, moral dilemma, and then some more

Read on AO3

Chapter One

The apartment door was wide open.

In retrospect, that alone should have set off the alarm bells in Zoya’s head. No one left the door to their place wide open. She can’t imagine why she simply dismissed it.

Scratch that, she knew why. She’d been tracking this idiotic Grisha for a month now. She was tired and desperate.

But it appeared that- who would’ve thought- not being at the top of your game has consequences.

Consequences like staring down a man who’s been tied to a chair and gagged in the middle of, what Zoya guesses is, the lounge, eyes wide with terror.

Zoya is mad at herself for not managing to guess it was a red herring- the damn door - and very, very mad at the Grisha who has, once again, slipped right through her hands.

She nods to one of her men, and he immediately drops to the man’s level to untie and presumably interrogate him. Zoya doesn’t stick around for the details- she trusts her people to give her good reports. Instead, after a cursory look around, she tips her head back to face the ceiling, taking in a deep breath, and leaves the apartment.

The weather outside took a dramatic turn in the fifteen minutes she was inside- it had been sunny before, or at least as sunny as Ravka ever could get. But now, the sun has all but ceased to exist, and the bitter cold is back once more.

Zoya prefers the cold.

(She doesn’t, not really, but no one needed to know that.)

Zoya starts walking, pulling her coat tighter around herself. Her mind races, trying to connect all the dots, trying to figure out where her investigation had gone wrong. Start from the beginning. Don’t miss anything. The most minor of details are the most important.

The beginning. A woman showed up to their headquarters about her missing family. Those cases were usually dismissed completely, handed over to the police forces- Zoya’s force was Grisha-centric, other cases, no matter how large or important they were, did not concern them. But this case was different.

The woman was Grisha.

Her family weren’t, evidently- and neither did they know that she was. They’d been missing for six weeks, and the odds were pretty heavily stacked against them still being alive. The woman was detained (she was Grisha, this was Zoya’s job ) and a group of officers were dispatched for a search and rescue.

The officers never returned.

Alarm bells were now ringing, and the General assigned Zoya to the case. In the time since she officially took over, twenty more disappearances were documented, and all of them in Os Kerva alone. Saints knew what was happening in the rest of the country.

But Zoya had never believed in Saints, so she found out what was happening in the rest of the country.

The total number of disappearances in all of Ravka that had this case’s signature mark- an eclipsed sun left wherever the victims were seen last- was an estimated three thousand . Zoya couldn’t believe no one had connected the dots before her. Then again, the entire of the force were filled with incompetent idiots, so maybe it shouldn’t have surprised her.

The series of events . Zoya travelled up and down the country with the best of her underlings, talking to anyone who knew the victims, searching their last known places with tooth combs, building up working hypotheses, using all the resources they had available. Zoya was not an idiot. She knew exactly how capable she was.

And she also knew when she was fighting a losing battle.

And so, when she got a call from one of her top detectives about a confirmed Grisha she’d been trailing for some time now who’d begun suspicious activity, she was clutching at straws and willing to take anything that came her way. She met up with her agent, and a few days later, they got the address of the apartment she was currently pacing in front of.

The present . This part could be summed up fairly quickly. Zoya is, once again, at a fucking dead end .

Before she can kick something (or someone) out of frustration, A faint ringing reaches her ears, and frowning, Zoya stops in her tracks. Her phone is never not on silent. Calling Zoya Nazyalensky for anything was utterly pointless- she never picked up.

But the GIA has ways of getting into contact with its members regardless.

Muttering a curse, Zoya digs around her pockets, looking for the infernal device with its grating, high-toned ringing. Finally locating her phone, she jabs the answer button without looking at the caller ID.

“Yes?” she asks bluntly.

“Zoya,” Alina’s voice greets her.

Zoya immediately forgets everything that had been on her mind. When Alina calls, it’s rarely for a friendly chat.

“What’s wrong?”

“You need to get back here. As soon as possible.”

“Understood. I’ll be there in twenty minutes.”

Alina hangs up immediately, and Zoya pockets her phone, mind racing.

She orders one of her lackeys to send her a report when they're done, grabs the keys for the van they’d used to get to the apartment from a rather distracted officer, taking off.

Zoya reaches the Grisha Investigation Authorities in approximately half the time she’d given to Alina, and she may or may not have disobeyed quite a few traffic laws to get to her destination as quickly as she did, but that was frankly unimportant.

She strides through the doors, not bothering to acknowledge the many who’ve halted their paths to nod to her or, in the case of a few particularly stupid (or courageous, however you wanted to see it) people, attempt to strike up a conversation with her. She didn’t break her pace even once, until she’d reached the door to the meeting room they usually used to meet up for serious issues. After taking a moment to compose herself, Zoya pushes the door open.

Inside, she finds all of her fellow Commanding Officers assembled- Adrik, Leoni, Alina, and Genya. Frowning, Zoya scans their faces, and mentally shifts whatever’s happening even higher on her scale of terrible shit to take care of immediately.

Because not even Leoni, who can find positivity at a funeral, is smiling right now. There’s barely a hint of her optimistic and eternally cheerful personality in her countenance.

Zoya carefully takes the seat left for her around the circular table. Her gaze flits from one worried face to another, and she decides to be direct.

“How bad is it?”

The question seems to jolt Alina out of her reverie. She looks up, and Zoya feels her breath catch, because she looks so… helpless. Terrified.

Genya takes it upon herself to answer Zoya’s question with another question, her mouth set in a grim line. “How’s your investigation going?”

“We lost the suspect,” Zoya admits, her earlier frustration returning with the reminder of the infernal case. “We’re right back to where we started- but without the hope and the general idea of where to start.”

“I’m not surprised,” Adrik mutters. “Considering who your delightful suspect is…”

Zoya furrows her brow, and glances back at Genya. “Explain.”

Genya looks as if she would rather do anything else, but after coming to the realisation that no one else is about to, she sighs and does so.

“I’m presuming you remember Alina’s case that went cold about two years back?”

A little too well. Even years later, that case haunts her- the truly horrific killings, from corpses with their body parts stuffed down their throats, to children who had clearly been still alive when burnt, the utter dead ends, Alina’s far too close brush with death, and… the person behind it all.

“You don’t think it’s the same person??” Zoya demands, horror spreading through her veins. She can not handle another Kirigan.

In lieu of replying, Genya nods to Leoni, who pushes forward a large envelope. Dread pooling in her gut, Zoya opens the package to find pictures from Alina’s investigation.

“We revisited these when your disappearances started,” Genya says. “And… found more similarities than we’re frankly comfortable with.”

Zoya shifts the photos around, and then freezes at one, having caught sight of a mostly blurry but still distinctive calling card. “That’s…”

“The eclipsed sun,” Adrik provides grimly. “You’re screwed.”

“Hey, now,” Leoni protests. “We don’t know that.”

Adrik snorts. “Don’t we? Need I remind you of the damage this person wrecked to the GIA and our country?”

“How do we know this isn’t just a copycat?” Zoya breaks in. “None of the bodies of the victims this time around have been discovered,”

“Copy cats still tend to have their own twists on kills, a signature, a mark that’s theirs. While none of the killings for either case have many similarities, they also don’t vary in terms of said signature.” Genya says.

“Killers are proud creatures,” Adrik inputs.

“And this one’s no exception,” Leoni says, eyes grim.

Zoya looks up. “What do you know?”

Leoni hesitates, but then gives in. “We got a note this morning. A photocopy should be in the envelope too.”

Zoya overturns the envelope, and sure enough, a piece of paper falls out. She picks it up, reads it, and crumples it up.

“You’re sure this isn’t a stupid joke?”

“It was in the Director’s office.” Leoni says.

Shit. Zoya glances back down at the crumpled mass she’s still clutching. You will burn on your mistakes. What mistakes?

She ignores the faint voice in the back of her head. You know what mistakes.

Zoya takes a deep breath, focuses her thoughts, and then exhales. “How’s the Director doing?”

“He’s terrified.” All of the COs seemed to be equally startled to see Alina was the one to speak. Her mouth is set in an angry line, and Zoya can guess the track of her thoughts, because they were the same ones that had crossed her mind upon hearing the words- who is he to be terrified? What right did the Director even have to feel scared, when he himself never so much as interacted with the cases???

Adrik sighs, leaning back in his seat. “Which is what has led us to our current predicament.”

“And what do you mean by that?”

Genya exhales in a huff. “He wants the Mentals on this case along with all of us.”

“He what.”

Alina, lips twisted in a sardonic smile, gestures to nothing in particular. “You heard correctly.”

“Why ??? This is my case, and I will handle it.”

“He doesn’t want a repeat of the bad press that came with my failing last time, I’m guessing.”

“Bad press,” Zoya spits out. “I wonder how much bad press he’ll get when I-”

“Do not,” Genya warns. “This could be helpful to us.”

But also a personal disgrace , Zoya finishes the sentence in her head. The Mentals were practically a legend of the GIA- they were special, elite investigators, a whole mix of people ranging from scientists to- if the rumors were correct- ex-spies, who ended up with the cases no one else in the force could solve, and somehow, without fail, solved each of them within a week at the least.

It was irritating as hell.

And having them assigned on your case meant that the Director did not trust you to be successful on your own.

Absolutely wonderful.

“So when are these... spectacular detectives arriving?” Zoya asks.

Genya opens her mouth, and then closes it, before starting, “Well-”

“I hope I’m not too late to this marvelous party?”

Zoya swivels to see who this truly abnormally cheerful person is, and then blinks. She turns back to face the others once more- Adrik still looks glum, Leoni is smiling her most polite smile, Alina seems to have perked up and Genya is genuinely smiling. They all look… unsurprised.

Of course they were hiding more secrets up their sleeves.

“ What,” Zoya finally breaks and asks. “Is the damned PR guy doing here?”

The aforementioned PR guy pouts. “Is that really what I’m known for around here? My PR duties? That’s quite depressing. Why would you focus on that when you could talk about my stunning good looks, or my undeniable charm, or even my ability to-”

“Nikolai,” Alina interrupts. “Shut up.” she looks at Zoya, a hint of dry amusement in her eyes.

“Zoya, this is Nikolai Lantsov, and he is indeed our PR guy, but he’s also… head of the Mentals.”

Zoya blinks. He’s what??? And then, wait… they knew who the special investigators were? How long have they known? Why was I not informed?

She doesn’t voice any of her thoughts, choosing instead to stare, unimpressed, at the blond, who grins at her in response.

“If I had known you possessed such astounding grace and beauty, Miss Nazyalensky, I would have made your acquaintance sooner! I’m sure these upcoming days will prove to be an absolute pleasure, provided I get to spend them in your delightful company.”

“Saints save me,” Zoya utters faintly. “The Director assigned an idiot to my case.”

“Hey, now!” Nikolai protests. “You haven’t even met the rest of my team yet!”

“An idiot who talks too much,” she deplores.

Genya and Alina both snort at that. In fact, all of her fellow COs seemed to be taking far too much pleasure in this situation. Zoya hates all of them.

“Well, now that we’ve gotten the pleasantries out of the way,” Nikolai says, to which Zoya distinctly hears Adrik mutter “pleasantries?” under his breath, “I think now would be a wonderful time for me to introduce you to my brilliant team,”

Genya sits up immediately, looking eager. Zoya wonders what that’s about.

She finds out fairly quickly.

Nikolai ushers in a group of people, and she recognises one in particular, one who she has, in fact, known since her college years -

David. Genya’s husband, David Kostyk, is a part of the Mentals. Harmless old David. Zoya can’t believe her eyes.

She scans the rest of the group, but the others barely seem familiar. The two Shu right in front of David look similar enough to be twins, apart from the height difference. Right next to David is a woman that, with a jolt, Zoya recognises as Adrik’s sister from what she’s heard and seen of her. Bringing up the rear is a man who vaguely resemblesNikolai himself, ducking his head shyly as he enters the room.

“Now that your merry party is all assembled,” Adrik says glumly. “Any ideas where to start?”

“Shouldn’t we at least get to know each other first?” Adrik’s sister asks.

Adrik stares at her. “I’ve known you since I was born.”

“We’re not the only ones in the room, Adrik.”

“Oh, aren’t we ? I can’t say I noticed.”

Nikolai interrupts their glaring match to finally provide Zoya with names to all the unfamiliar faces.

“Tamar, Tolya, Nadia, and Isaak, meet the officers we’ll be working with for the next few weeks or longer- Alina, Genya, Zoya, Leoni, and Adrik,” he gestures towards each person in turn. Zoya briefly wonders how he already knows their names, before realising that just because the GIA didn’t know who the special investigators were didn’t exactly mean they didn’t know the GIA either.

“And now,” Nikolai beams. “Let’s get comfortable. It’s time to discuss our present conundrum!”

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rivalsforlife · 3 years ago

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AA7 Speculation Post: One Year Later

here we go again.

A year and a day ago, I made a speculation post about if/when we’d ever be seeing AA7. Obviously, my claim that AA7 would be announced in September 2020 did not turn out to be true, but later that year we did get a leaked calendar containing information on the new ports for Chronicles, and also plans for a new aa7, which I summarized in this post.

Now that we have Chronicles we can verify that the leaks contained legitimate information (as if a statement from Capcom saying they were hacked wasn’t legitimate enough). So that leaves us with one key question: is AA7 still happening? If so, when can we expect it? As well, what other information from the leaked calendar can we consider, especially with early sales data on Chronicles? In addition, what are the implications of this new survey on Chronicles from Capcom?

All of that will be discussed under the cut so that this doesn’t take up too much space.

Revisiting The Calendar

Once again, here is a rough translation of the calendar that was present in the leaks:

As a note, in this post, I’ll be referring to our new games as “Chronicles” to prevent this from being blocked by people avoiding spoilers.

So: this original calendar, generated before the pandemic, had Chronicles releasing in Q1 of FY2021 - and it’s also important to note that in Japan, each fiscal year starts in April 1st, so FY2021 is actually April-June 2021. This shows that Chronicles was pushed back about a quarter from their expected release date. However, Chronicles was a port of already existing games, therefore somewhat less work was needed on them - upscaling models and textures, adding in some new features like autoplay and story mode, and of course, the English translation and voicework were needed, which is still a lot of course, but less compared to development on an entirely new game. In addition to that, the pandemic hit AA7 in its early development stage, assuming this schedule was still being followed by the time the pandemic hit. That could cause more delays than expected.

So the original plan was for AA7 to be released in Q3 of 2021, which corresponds to October-December, aligning with the 20th anniversary of the series in October. While it’s a desirable goal, it’s quite likely the pandemic pushed it back at least a quarter, if not more, if not cancelled it entirely. ... haha.

We’ll only know the fate of AA7 for certain when it’s announced. Which it is possible it may never be. However, I have two theories for, if AA7 is getting an announcement, when it will be:

1) Sometime during September 2021, either in the leadup to or during Tokyo Game Show this year. These are for the same reasons as I outlined in my initial speculation post. It’s a popular time for Ace Attorney game announcements, after all. TGS, according to what I can find, will be held online this year from September 30th to October 3rd. If Capcom announces AA7 earlier in September through Famitsu, like they did with AA6 for example, then we can expect to get some information during TGS...

2) Sometime during a 20th Anniversary Event, possibly in October 2021. I’m assuming AA is planning something for the 20th anniversary - Chronicles wasn’t really marketed as a 20th anniversary release, for instance. If they can’t release a new game for the 20th anniversary (which at this rate, seems unlikely, as we’re about two months out from that with no word about it) then an announcement would be just as good at generating hype for it.

Naturally, if we reach this time next year with absolutely no news on AA7, it’s probably safe to say it’s been cancelled or at least delayed so severely that anything we currently know about it isn’t worth much.

There’s one more point of interest on the calendar: reconsidering the porting of 456. I feel that this depends heavily on how well the Chronicles ports are doing; if it’s not financially viable to keep porting games, then why bother? So, let’s take a look at that.

The Success of Chronicles

As I write this, it’s about two and a half weeks since the release of Chronicles worldwide. So... how did the games do? It’s a bit hard to tell, especially as I am not a game marketer and don’t know the expectations for Chronicles. What is obvious is that, if Chronicles does much better than expected, porting 456 and possibly even the investigations games seems likely. (If Chronicles, indeed, does especially well in the West, than a porting of the investigations games and localization of investigations 2 after ten years could very well be possible.) If Chronicles does absolutely terribly, it damages the chances of porting, and possibly of continuing the series. If it does terribly especially in the West, where the games are essentially new, it could damage the chances of any new games being localized at all.

So, a lot is riding on this, and I don’t know enough to tell how well it did. Here’s what I have found, however:

Nintendo Enthusiast reports on Famitsu sales of Switch games, and overall thinks it’s not doing so great. Chronicles ranks third on the list of Switch sales in its first week, with 14,460 units sold, over 4000 less than NEO: The World Ends With You, which was released on July 27th. Keep in mind that Chronicles was released in Japan on July 29th, which is two days later, and that these are only Japanese sales (where they’ve had Chronicles for years on both mobile and 3DS) and only Switch sales, where NEO:TWEWY is currently only available on Switch and PS4 (Chronicles has the additional platform of Steam, where there could be many more sales). In the next week, Chronicles ranked 22 overall, with NEO:TWEWY at 23, though of course they’re still a little less than 4000 units behind NEO:TWEWY overall. Slightly closing the gap, I guess.

How about overseas data, then? ... It’s hard to tell. I can find this report from gamespot which discusses the top 20 games sold in the US in July, and Chronicles is not on the list, while NEO:TWEWY is at 16. However, they don’t give any number for the units sold, and it seems that they aren’t considering digital sales for a lot of them, so it’s hard to tell how much of a hit that is.

However, let’s go back to Japanese sales for a bit, and look at the 2019 Trilogy re-release for a comparison against Chronicles. Allegedly, combined Switch and PS4 sales in the first week of the trilogy’s release only amounted to about 8000 units, a little more than half that of Chronicles’ Switch sales. It’s also important to note that the 2019 trilogy ended up being the only ace attorney game to sell over a million copies. Ace Attorney is not a big series; I’m sure Capcom takes this into account when considering sales data, especially for ports. If Chronicles does end up doing better than the trilogy overall, it’s definitely looking good for ports and especially so for Chronicles.

However, there’s more to this than just sales data.

The Survey

Capcom now has a user survey for Chronicles, which you can answer even if you’re partway through the first game. I believe it’s only open until September 30 2021, so if you think you can finish the game before then, I’d recommend filling it out once you’re done so that you can give the best feedback.

It asks you a bunch of questions like what platform you bought it on, why you bought it, your expectations, and all sorts of detailed questions on the various mechanics, difficulty and enjoyment of the trials and investigations, satisfaction of visuals, plot, characters, music, and even free response sections for what you liked and disliked about the game. It’s a very detailed survey that’s pretty long but I think is worth filling out. At the end they ask you to fill out some demographic questions (such as age, gender (male, female, other), country, what kind of things you like to spend money on, and what kind of games you like, what platforms you have to play games on). But what’s possibly the most interesting question is this:

“If a new [Chronicles] game is released in the future, do you think you would buy it?”

This means that, depending on the answers to the survey, they could very well decide to work on a third game to Chronicles.

This has huge implications for the future of the series. I’ll probably make a separate post on plot-related stuff later, but for now... let’s talk about logistics.

In my initial AA7 speculation post I said I highly doubted that they would ever make another Chronicles game. I also said that they probably never would be localized, so, guess who’s a clown now.

Right now the AA series is in a bit of a dry period, with no new games having been released in the last four years. As well, with Yamazaki (the director of the investigations games and AA5/6) having left Capcom, the next director of the mainline games is completely unknown. As described in this video, the main reason Chronicles ever came about was because Capcom went ahead with mainline AA5 before Takumi could come back from the Layton crossover. Now, since 2017, we don’t really know what Takumi is working on. It’s possible he’s gone back to mainline to work on AA7 (though of course, there is absolutely no evidence suggesting that he has, so definitely don’t take that as any sort of confirmation).

However, if we do get a Chronicles 3, it’s quite likely Takumi would return to work on that, as he directed the previous two games. In addition, if Chronicles ends up being such a success to completely eclipse mainline (from what I’ve heard, though I have no serious proof, Resolve is considered as highly rated as T&T by many Japanese fans) then the series could permanently go down the road of writing more Chronicles games, leaving mainline stagnant (which, let’s be real, it’s already stagnating). The success of that is uncertain considering how neatly our current Chronicles duology wraps up, but... we’ll have to see how things unfold in the future.

For now, I highly recommend filling out the survey to give your input to the series’ future directions. Maybe mention that you want localized investigations 2 somewhere in the free response section because uhh I forgot to do it in mine. do that for me.

TL;DR

Main takeaways from this post are:

- I personally expect an AA7 announcement either during TGS or a 20th anniversary event

- If Chronicles does extremely well, then 456 ports are likely to happen, and I personally speculate investigations ports (along with localized investigations 2) will as well.

- Fill out this Chronicles survey before September 30th to give your input on the games and possibly the future direction of the series. I recommend completing the games before you do, but if you think you won’t before September 30th, you can fill it out at any time.

- We Very Well May Get Another Chronicles Game. Who saw that coming. Not me.

Thanks if you read through all of this, let’s hope September/October doesn’t leave me looking like a fool again.

#aa7 speculation #my posts #ace attorney

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iliveiloveiwrite · 4 years ago

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A Ghost is a Wish // G.W.

Summary: Three years after the events of Potions and Constellations, George Weasley cannot help but wonder of the ghosts that haunt the many rooms of the enchanted castle he now calls home.

A/N: Part two to Potions and Constellations! I have decided to make a mini series out of it, focusing on Professor!George and his many adventures at Hogwarts. Title is a quote from The Haunting of Hill House (I love that show so much). I don't think you necessarily need to read the first part to understand this, but some parts could be confusing.

Warnings: time skip, ghosts, spectres, hauntings, swearing, grief, established relationship, fluff, cute, fred is dead.

Word count: 3.8k

At this point in his life, George Weasley has been teaching three years. It wasn’t meant to be a permanent post, but rather a position filled until someone more qualified was found for the job. That was what McGonagall had led him to believe so many seconds, minutes, hours ago.

Yet, three years later, George was still to be found lecturing day in and day out to scores of young witches and wizards about the benefits and downfalls of potions and their ingredients. He didn’t say it often, but he had found his home within the walls of the dungeon that served as his classroom. He felt nothing but comfort as he meandered through the stone corridors of the school, greeting students by name, always getting a happy response in return.

Three years later, and he finds himself wholly in love with you and ready to dedicate his whole life to the profession of teaching in order to remain close to you. He misses his brother; the grief of losing someone so close to you isn’t something that simply fades over night, but having you close by, willing to share that burden makes it all the easier.

The grief of Fred still weighs him down; it still crawls up his throat and threatens to suffocate him, but he finds ways of managing whether it is planning a new lesson or distracting you from your own school work. However, it cannot be ignored for long and though the burden has been halved, George still finds himself missing and wondering about Fred.

----------

George paces the front of his classroom, his hands moving in circles as he explains the task to his class. A rather light potion for Sixth Years to be brewing but given that it’s Friday afternoon and Potions is the last lesson of the day for these students, George decides to go easy on them.

“I want you to revisit a potion from Second Year. Collect the ingredients for and brew a Wiggenweld Potion. You have the rest of the afternoon to do so and you can chat amongst yourselves. I’ll be making rounds so if you have any questions, don’t hesitate to ask.”

Auden Vincent raises his hand, waving it so fast there is genuine worry he might hit another student. Deciding not to repress his smile, George acknowledges the Sixth Year.

“Sir,” Auden begins, “Did you enjoy your time at Hogwarts?”

“What does that have to do with a Wiggenweld Potion, Auden?”

Auden shrugs, a large smile on his face that shows he knows exactly what he is doing. “I can’t help but be curious, you haven’t been here as long as the other teachers.”

“Three years, Auden. I’ve been teaching you Potions for three years.”

“Still,” The young teenager argues, “I think we would like to get to know you more.”

George sighs and glances at the clock. Knowing Auden and his tendency to disrupt lessons, George chooses to give in to the teenager. “I enjoyed my time at Hogwarts very much. Now, please, get on with your potion.”

From the frown that spreads across Auden’s face, it is clear that George has not given enough information. Already, the fight begins to light in Auden’s eyes, more and more questions rising to the brink, ready to be dropped into conversation and derail George’s lesson.

“Auden,” George sighs, “Before you ask any more questions, understand that I attended Hogwarts through the Second Wizarding War. Whilst I enjoyed my time at the school, I also fought in the war.”

Any argument Auden was going to pose falls flat; the fight leaves his eyes in a second. The teenager nods wordlessly before turning his attention back to the set work. George feels awful; he would love to do nothing more than to tell his students about his time at Hogwarts, but all of his memories contain Fred, and even though it’s been years, and even though his grief doesn’t haunt him as often as it used to, he just isn’t ready to verbalise such happy memories.

Rolling up his sleeves, George starts to wander around the classroom he has made his own. A whole wall is dedicated to lines and lines of ingredients; each one sealed in jars and carefully labelled. Think back to his own lessons in this very classroom, George can see how the room has lightened with his presence. The darkness that encompassed Snape completely absent as George expertly weaves through tables and past students.

He smiles encouragingly at every student; letting them know where they’re going and where they need some improvement. George believes that it is important to revisit past potions, to keep minds sharp and fingers nimble before moving onto something more difficult.

It’s as George is leant over the cauldron of Alexandra Shea that the door to the classroom opens. “I’ll be one moment,” George calls out before pointing Alexandra in the right direction.

“Take all the time you need, Professor Weasley.”

George smiles before he can help himself. Your relationship had never been a secret; the whole school knowing the two of you were in love long before either of you realise, but George still tried to keep some level of professionalism around students.

Tried being the operative word.

You stand by the doorway, one of George’s jumpers hanging from your torso, the sleeves are so long that they swallow your hands. A tired smile is on your face, your hair barely brushed into some semblance of a ponytail. Professionalism be damned when you look like that.

You’re perfect, he thinks as he brushes himself down before walking over to you.

“Love,” George greets as he sends the class back to their potions, “What are you doing up? You’re teaching tonight.”

You shrug, a soft smile spreading across your face, “I missed you. I wanted to see you.”

George smiles, feeling the familiar flush spread up his neck and to his cheeks. Years on, and you still make him feel like a teenage boy experiencing his first tryst with love. “Consider me flattered, Professor,” George flirts.

“You should be,” You counter, the soft smile still on your face, “Will I see you tonight?”

Friday evenings had been reserved for you two. Your schedule as the Astronomy Professor meant that you worked markedly different hours from George, but regardless of the piles of work and awkward hours, Friday evenings were set aside for you both.

Reaching out for your hand, George tangles your fingers together before squeezing. His gaze doesn’t leave yours as he replies, “I wouldn’t miss it for the world. I have to know the story behind Corona Borealis.”

You shake your head in exasperated fondness, “You’ve heard that one before.”

“I’ve heard them all before,” George reminds you; knowing your curriculum just as well as his own, “But every time feels like the first time when you tell me the story.”

You roll your eyes, “A flirt, Weasley. That’s what you are.”

“Only for you,” He mouths, not letting his students overhear every word of your conversation. George brings your hand to his lips, dropping a kiss to the back of it before dropping it, “Go back to bed, love. I’ll come see you before dinner.”

The smile on your face grows as you stand on your tiptoes, pressing a long kiss to his cheek – an innocent act that only holds headier promises for the future. “I’ll be waiting, Weasley.”

A flush spreads across George’s face as he watches you go, closing the door behind you. He waits a moment, calming down before turning back to the class. His students try to look as if they haven’t heard the whole exchange, intensely focused on the potions brewing in front of them.

“Not a word, Auden,” George warns, pointing at the student before throwing himself back into the melee.

-----------

Over his time as a Professor, George had come to known the ghosts of Hogwarts. As a student, he hadn’t bothered getting to know them – believing that pranks and jokes were of a higher importance that hearing the histories relayed by Professor Binns. However, now older and wiser, George made sure to spend time with the spectres that floated down corridors and through walls. He spoke to them, hearing their stories, understanding their histories.

George doesn’t admit it to anyone why he seeks out to know the stories of the ghosts of Hogwarts. He doesn’t tell a soul that he’s trying to find the answer to the one question that has plagued his mind since he took up the job offer from McGonagall all those years ago.

Nearly Headless Nick had greeted him with the same amount of gusto as he had when George was a First Year worried about spending his first night away from home and his mum. Nick often checked in with the Gryffindor he had watched grow up; often floated to the dungeon to see how George was doing, frequently staying longer to talk about anything and everything that occupied either of their minds.

The Bloody Baron was harder to talk to. A staunch Slytherin, the ghost was dedicated to his house, but warmed up to George somewhat when George explained how he worked and spent most of his time in the dungeon teaching Slytherins.

Peeves the Poltergeist has only ever respected a handful of people. Begrudgingly, he would admit that he admired the Marauders – confessing it now as they had all passed on and his words could not be used against him. Nonetheless, Peeves would tell any soul who would listen for than one minute that he respected the Weasley twins and their dedication to all things mischief. For George, it was easier to talk to Peeves. They could compare prank ideas and products for the shop, and slowly but surely, George grew to understand Peeves backstory.

Late at night, however, George couldn’t help but wonder whether there was one more ghost in the castle he had yet to meet.

The curiosity niggled at the back of his mind; the very idea of it settled deep within his bones, stirring him to life in the middle of the night when the ghosts were at their busiest. Countless times, George had woken from a daze to find himself with his hand on the handle to his door, ready to turn and find out for himself.

On one hand, George desperately wants to know whether there is a chance.

On the other hand, George knows that he barely coped in the months after the war. He knows that if he doesn’t get the answer he so desires, it could the setback he has been dreading.

----------

The corridors of Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry have always had an uncomfortable atmosphere to them. When filled with the rushed footsteps of students, the pathways have a lighter air to them, but after the students are safely tucked up in their beds, the darker parts of the castle come out to play.

George’s grip on your hand remains tight as you both wander through the corridors of the school, keeping an eye out for straying students. Scores of portraits decorate the stone walls of the castle; each one a prominent figure throughout the history of witchcraft and wizardry. Each one is asleep; their snores punctuating the silence between you and George.

Checking the old watch on his left wrist, George sighs with relief, “Midnight. We can get back to bed now.”

You smile, happy for your extra-curricular task to be done, “Thank Merlin. Let’s head back.”

Something feels different about the corridors as the both of you make your way back to your shared rooms. There’s a charge to the air around you, something electric that only has your steps quickening the closer you get to your rooms.

It’s the odd flashes of silver you spy out of the corner of your eye that have your steps beginning to falter. There was a ghost nearby, but it could not be Peeves – you hear him before you see him unless he has something especially sinister planned. It’s not Nick, the Baron or the Friar – they’re all at Ravenclaw Tower, trying to persuade the Grey Lady to socialise more.

It has to be someone new.

But as you catch eyes with George, you realise that it has been years since a new ghost has made Hogwarts its home. The Battle of Hogwarts had created ghosts and spectres galore, but in the aftermath, they had all found their peace and moved on.

“Georgie?” A voice calls and George promptly freezes, his hand falling from your grip as he trips up on thin air.

“George?” You murmur, puzzled at his sudden stop.

He can feel the colour drain from his face; feel the unwelcome churning of his gut as memory after memory washes over him. That voice… he hasn’t heard that voice in years.

“George… it’s me,” The voice calls out once more; it sounding stronger now, surer of itself.

Steeling his nerves and his heart, George turns in the direction of the spectral call.

He meets a face identical to his, but not. He meets a face that has not aged, has not hurt, has not cried in years. He meets a face entirely youthful and at peace.

George meets the face of his twin brother, Fred.

“Fred?” George whispers, voice breaking from sheer disbelief. In that one word alone, you can hear the years of grief and upset. You can feel the tears that will surely fall later tonight; you can see the pain written across George’s face.

Fred smiles: it’s as watery as you can get for a spectral vision, but it’s there. “It’s me, Georgie,” He reassures, “I promise.”

“It’s been so long,” George states needlessly. “So long,” He repeats as if counting the days of absences for his brother, noting each second, minute and hour that he has been without his twin.

“Who’s looking after the shop?” Fred asks, changing subject, dragging his brother away from the dark path he once wandered alone.

“Ron,” George answers, “He has some help from Harry on the weekends when it gets busier, but Ron is managing a lot. I think Bill is wanting to help out more too.”

“That’s good,” Fred nods. “You seem to fit in well, Professor Weasley,” Fred comments, gesturing to the robes now adorning his brother’s frame.

George laughs, his hand reaching for yours once more as you remain silent through the whole exchange, “Who would have thought it?”

“Not me,” Fred snorts, laughing at George’s bark of protest. All too quickly, Fred’s eyes are drawn to you, standing by George’s side, hand clasped in his ever so tightly. Your heartbeat quickens at seeing the stark youth on Fred’s face.

“It’s been too long, (Y/N),” Fred greets.

“How are you, Fred?”

“Better now that I know he isn’t alone.”

“You were watching?” George asks, tone aghast.

Fred gives his twin a look that coveys not only his brother’s stupidity but also the overwhelming brotherly love Fred has for his twin. “Of course I was. That’s how I knew I could come to you now. You aren’t alone, you’re managing.”

“I haven’t been alone for three years,” George points out as if would make an ounce of difference to Fred’s reasoning for showing up tonight.

Fred rolls his eyes. “I know that, but you weren’t ready. I could have appeared months ago but chose not to. I wanted you to be okay after I go again.”

George’s hand tighten around yours; his knuckles whitening as Fred’s words sink in. “You’re not a regular ghost of the castle are you? Not like Nick or Peeves?”

Fred shakes his head. “I have to go back,” He says, gesturing behind him as if the place in which he now belongs is right there within reach, “But I wanted to see you, so I got my wish.”

“I got mine too,” George says so quietly you wonder whether you’ve misheard him.

“You look old,” Fred laughs, defusing the tension that threatens to boil over any moment.

George snorts, speaking without thinking, “That’s what life will do to you.”

George immediately freezes as the words leave his mouth. He meets Fred’s gaze, a thousand apologues ready and willing to fall from his lips as rain would fall from the sky. Sorrow is written in every premature line, and in every blink of his eyes, but George doesn’t get to speak the words

“I know,” Fred replies. The both of them more than aware that those two words cover more than the apology left unsaid just now by George. They cover years of repenting on George’s behalf; for not being there, for not saying goodbye, for not protecting his brother.

“Will you do me a favour?” Fred asks, drawing his brother back from the depths of his mind and his grief.

“Anything.”

“Tell Mum, I’m okay? I know she worries, and I know she misses me. I just… I need her to know that I’m okay and I’m looked after.”

“I’ll floo home this weekend and tell her,” George promises; conviction and determination weighing down his voice.

“I have to go,” Fred comments, sadness in his tone as he glances back behind him, as if hearing a call only audible to his ears alone.

“I miss you,” George whispers as Fred fades away.

His twin brother pauses, lifting a hand to him, “I’m always with you, George.”

Those are his final words before he fades away back to the afterlife; the place in which he watches over every member of his family, keeping an eye on them like a determined guardian angel.

-----------

The walk to your shared room is completed in a daze. You had known Fred from your time as a student; unable to get away from the stories of his pranks, but as your relationship with George progressed, you felt as if you knew him better.

Fred’s visit was unexpected, and as your hand only wraps around George’s tighter, you can only wonder what was running through his mind.

He doesn’t speak as you push open the heavy wooden door to your rooms; doesn’t speak as you lead him to the bed. “Love,” You say gently, “We need to get ready for bed.”

George does so woodenly; still in a daze with what he’s just experienced in the corridor. You watch him with worried eyes, chewing on the inside of your cheek as he pulls back the covers and slides into bed.

Tomorrow, you promise yourself. Tomorrow you would broach the subject; you would let him have tonight to work through the flurry of emotions no doubt rushing through his veins this very moment.

As your eyes grow heavy, you fist your hand into George’s thin t-shirt, reminding him that you’re here.

----------

George doesn’t sleep. He feels your breathing slow; watching the exact moment your eyes start to flutters as dreams begin. Gently he shifts in bed, sliding out from the covers and leaving you behind as he tries to work through the events of the evening.

He wanders out to the small living area; big enough to fit a couch and a table that is used more for marking than it is for eating. George slumps down onto the couch; running a hand down his face and waiting for the inevitable tears to start flowing down his face.

At the same time, he feels such sorrow and such relief. For years now, George has carried the weight of his guilt surrounding Fred’s death on his shoulders. On his more dramatic days, George would compare it to the weight Atlas feels when holding the Earth. George has carried this burden for so long, and in a ten minute conversation with the ghost of his dead twin, he has been absolved of it.

He doesn’t know the extent of what he is supposed to feel.

George stares into the permanently lit fire; questioning all he can about the events of the evening. The guilt and grief he carries for his brother is what kept him from replying to McGonagall all those years ago; it was what had him rejecting the idea altogether. Instead, after a conversation with Ron, he said yes, and so far, George had yet to regret such a decision.

After all, if he had said no, he would not have met you, and would not have fallen in love so desperately.

George thinks of you; thinks of how you stood by his side, hand holding his tightly as George spoke to his brother. You had to have questions. George had told you everything; he couldn’t keep a secret from you. This was discovered early in your relationship when George had blabbed about the presents he had got you for Christmas – way too excited to know your reaction rather than wait.

He continues to stare at the fire; mind running through memories of Fred, wondering whether McGonagall would give him next week off to go home and be there for Molly when George inevitably passes on Fred’s message.

How does he do it? How does he begin to live his life now that Fred has forgiven him?

He has carried this burden for so long; passing it you when you asked to help. For years, after his death, Fred was a massive part of his life. George has lost count of the times over the years that he has heard something hilarious and turned to share it with Fred only to find he no longer stands at his side. How George rushed home the weekend he asked you to be his partner; desperate not only to tell his mum he thinks he’s found the love of his life, but to tell Fred as well to find his mother waiting with happy tears in her eyes and no sign of Fred whatsoever.

“George,” You rasp from the bedroom door, voice heavy from disturbed sleep, “Come back to bed.”

George nods, not speaking as he climbs back into bed. Positions change immediately. Usually, it would be you who would cuddle up the redhead, wanting to wrap yourself around him and fall asleep with his scent enveloping you. Instead, it is George’s turn to hide his face in your clothed shoulder as your arm wraps around him comfortingly. His whole body shudders as a fresh wave of grief overtakes him, but you’re there for every battering and every sob.

“I’m sorry,” You whisper, running a hand through his hair.

George shakes his head, calming himself down long enough to whisper, “Not your fault.”

“I’m still sorry,” You repeat, “It wasn’t as if you were expecting that tonight.”

“I wasn’t,” George admits, tears starting to slow, “I didn’t think I would see him ever again.”

“Are you glad that you have?”

George nods; his nose brushing your collarbone, “I am. I miss him just as much as I did in the beginning, but I know I’m going to come out of the other side now.”

“You do?”

“I do. I have you.”

******

General (HP) taglist: @chaotic-fae-queen @harrypotter289 @theweasleysredhair @kalimagik @heloisedaphnebrightmore @nebulablakemurphy @figlia--della--luna @probably-peeves @big-galaxy-chaos @annasofiaearlobe @imboredandneedalife @levylovegood @awritingtree @haphazardhufflepuff @stupxfy @chaoticgirl04 @accio-rogers @starlightweasley @dreaming-about-fanfictions @lestersglitterglue @msmimimerton @obx-beach @izzytheninja @slytherinprincess03 @bbeauttyybbx @breadqueen95 @acciotwinz @kashishwrites @slytherinsunrise @kylosleftbuttcheek @remmyswritings @they-write-once-in-a-blue-moon @ria-rests-here @superbturtlemakerathlete @inglourious-imagines @ithilwen-lionheart @now-its-time-for-a-breakdown @ilovejjmaybank @theonly1outof-a-billion @phuvioqhile @moatsnow @storyisnotover @himooonlight @missmulti @amourtentiaa

The Weasley Twins taglist: @whizboingies @seppys-return-to-madness @hexmione @ickle-ronniekins @oh-for-merlins-sake @somekidinacoma @wand3ringr0s3

#george weasley x reader #george x reader #george weasley imagine #george weasley imagines #george weasley

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sfb123 · 4 years ago

Text

Sapere Aude - Part 11

Book: The Royal Heir

Pairing: King Liam Rys x Queen Riley Brooks

All characters belong to Pixelberry.

Catch Up Here

Series Description: I developed a theory of what I think will happen in TRH Book 4, and I was encouraged by some very lovely people to turn my theory into a fic, so here it is. Basically, Riley is recruited to join the Via Imperii, this series will follow her as she joins them to try and bring them down from the inside, and all of the drama and bombshells she learns along the way. Sapere Aude is Latin for “dare to know” it seemed like an appropriate title.

Rating: PG-13 Adult language, discussions of death, conspiracy, blackmail, and other adult themes.

Warning: The Royal Heir Book 3 Spoilers all over the place.

Disclaimer: I have no current affiliation with any other Via Imperii themed stories. Any claims that I have pre-read anything are false.

Word Count: 2,909

A/N: First of all, I have a couple of new readers (hi, thank you, I love you) if this is your first Sapere Aude, stop here, go back, and start from the beginning. This series has a lot of bombs and surprises, so none of this is going to make sense, and it’s going to make it less exciting if you aren’t reading from the beginning.

Sorry, another long wait for a chapter. I got stuck, and distracted, and like a million other things. The Choices Insider email last week kind of lit a fire under me. When I started writing this (in December) the plan was to have it finished before the last book came out, so I have like a month to get through this. I’m going full out on getting this completed now, I will be working on nothing but this until it is done, and am hoping to finish it in time for the next book to come out so that PB has plenty of time to steal my ideas.

This chapter took a while for me to work through, but @jessiembruno was amazing and helped me every step of the way, and got like a million rambling text messages from me once the idea dam finally broke. And then pre-reading and leaving me some amazing love notes, and super helpful suggestions. She also kept encouraging me, and pushing me to work on it when my mind would wander into new ideas, or thoughts on some other random WIP that I started throwing together. I love you, and I am so grateful for this friendship that goes way beyond any of this. By the way, you are an AMAZING writer, and I will continue to shout it from the mountain tops as long as I live.

As always with this series, I need to thank @txemrn for pre-reading. I was having SUCH a miserable day and feeling so shitty about myself (for non-fandom reasons), and your reactions to this chapter made me laugh out loud for the first time in what felt like forever. I appreciate you so much my dear friend.

And of course, thank you @twinkleallnight for my beautiful series moodboard.

Tags: Listed below, you know the drill.

Liam exited the bedroom and walked toward the sitting area. He paused at the end of the hallway to observe his wife and his daughter sitting on the couch. Riley had her blouse in hand, sewing on the button Olivia sent her for her undercover mission. She was showing Eleanor how to sew, talking her through every stitch. The princess was watching and listening intently, taking in every word her mother said.

He leaned his right shoulder against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest as he admired his family. He didn’t understand how it was possible to fall even more in love every time he looked at them. All he wanted in this world was their happiness and safety, and now here he was, sending his wife straight to the enemy.

“Hi Daddy!” The angelic voice of his daughter pulled him from his thoughts.

“Hi Princess. Are you being a good helper for mommy?” He lifted Eleanor off the couch and sat in her seat, placing her on his lap.

“Best helper a girl could ask for.” Riley held her hand out, palm up, and Eleanor gave her a high five.

Liam enjoyed the company of his family for a few more moments, before placing a kiss on his daughter’s cheek. “Alright Eleanor, why don’t you go play in your room for a little while? Mommy and daddy have to talk about grown up things.”

“Yes, daddy. Will you come play after?”

“Of course, I believe I am owed a tea party.” He gave her a hug before setting her down and watching her run to her room. When she was gone, he turned his attention back to Riley. “How are you feeling, love?”

Riley cut the lingering thread from the button and placed her blouse on the table in front of them before responding. “I mean, obviously I’m nervous, but I’m optimistic that I’ll come back with something we can use. How are you feeling?”

He sighed and pulled her close to him, kissing the top of her head as it landed on his chest. “Riley, I love how much you worry about me, but let me worry about you right now. Let me be your support system. Tell me truly, how are you feeling?”

“I’m...I’m terrified.” She pulled back and looked him in the eyes, tears beginning to pool in her own. “I’m trying so hard to be strong, to put on a brave face, but this is fucking terrifying. We don’t know how deep it goes, we know some of the people that are involved, but how do we know that that’s everyone?”

“You’re right, there are a lot of unknowns, and that’s scary.” He cupped her face in his hands, wiping a falling tear with his thumb. “But I truly believe that we are going to end this. That you are going to end this. Don’t forget, you are the Champion of The Realm.”

“Yeah, but I’m sleeping with the guy who makes those decisions, he may have been a little biased.” She shrugged, half joking.

Liam removed his hands, his expression becoming more serious. “Riley, that’s not funny. You have earned every single thing you have received since you arrived in this country, our country. I don’t ever want you to believe that my feelings for you overrule my judgement when it comes to your abilities. You are the strongest person I have ever met. If anyone can do this, it’s you.”

“IF anyone can do this. What if nobody can?”

“Then we will face the fallout together. Like we always do, like we always will. We are the King and Queen of Cordonia, Liam and Riley Rys. We are a force to be reckoned with.” He raised an eyebrow as he parroted back her reassuring words from a few nights before.

She smirked at him. “Hey, no fair, you can’t use my own words to prove your point like that.”

“Yes I can, old negotiation tactic.” He winked at her and stood from the couch reaching for her hand. “Come on, we still have the whole day ahead of us. Let’s go have a tea party with our daughter, then I’m taking my girls out for dinner.”

****

Two days later, Riley was sitting in the back of an SUV heading toward the Fierro Estate. She was doing her best to quell her nerves, but she couldn’t help her hands from fidgeting in her lap.

“You seem on edge, ma’am. Is everything ok?” The sound of Mara’s voice cut through the silence, startling Riley.

“Oh...yeah, I’m fine Mara. I’m just not really sure what to expect from this meeting. Last time I went to one of these events, I found out my mother in law wasn’t actually dead. I don’t know if I could handle another surprise like that.”

Mara chuckled at her concern. “Don’t worry your majesty, this is a simple strategy meeting followed by a dinner. You have met all of the members, so there will be no surprise guests this time around.”

Riley nodded and turned her head, watching the scenery pass by as they continued to their destination. Her mind was racing thinking about what this meeting would have in store. She practiced taking pictures with the pen, and activating the recorder she had sewn into her shirt. As they got closer to the estate, she felt her heart rate speed up, and the knot in her stomach tighten.

When they arrived, Riley was ushered into the grand room, which had been set up with a large table. The other members were standing around in small groups chatting until it was time for the meeting to begin. Riley fidgeted with the pen, twirling it in her fingers before lifting it to her face and tapping it against her chin and clicking it several times. She hoped it came off as a nervous habit, providing cover for the fact that she was actually taking pictures around the room.

She gasped and nearly jumped out of her skin at the feeling of a hand gently being placed on her shoulder. She whipped around to see Eleanor smiling softly at her. “Riley dear, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you.”

“Oh, Eleanor. Hello.” Riley held her hand to her chest, trying to get her heart rate back to normal. “It’s ok, I’m just a little nervous. Not really sure what to expect from this meeting.”

“Don’t worry, I promise it’s just regular business, nothing earth shattering. Come on, it’s time to get this started, and you’re sitting next to me.” Eleanor wrapped her arm around Riley and led her to the table. The other guests took this as their cue to follow, as the meeting was about to get underway. As Riley sat, she adjusted her skirt and blouse, using the opportunity to activate the microphone embedded in her button.

As the chapter president, Eleanor kicked off the meeting by greeting their newest member, Queen Riley, and explaining that she was there to help push their initiatives though with the King. Riley clenched her fist ever so slightly, a trick she used when she was trying to keep her expression neutral. They continued on, reviewing the minutes of the last meeting, it all seemed to be pretty mundane, things that wouldn't even necessarily cross hers or Liam’s desk.

Then they opened up the floor to new business, and Neville stood to address the room. “I would like to revisit the Auvernal alliance.”

Riley was able to maintain her stoic expression, but her body tensed at the mention of Auvernal. She and Liam had made it perfectly clear that there would be no alliance. “I don’t believe there is anything to revisit there.” She chimed in. “King Liam and I determined that the alliance would not be beneficial for Cordonia.”

“Actually, I believe you determined the alliance would not be beneficial to you and your husband.” Neville rebutted, crossing his arms over his chest. “You didn’t want to marry off your daughter, you didn’t bother thinking of what the alliance could bring to our country.”

“Are you questioning the decisions of your monarchs? I urge you to remember your station, Lord Neville.” Riley raised an eyebrow and stood a bit taller.

Neville scoffed at her threat. “And I urge you to remember that you may have slept your way to the top in Cordonia, but the Via Imperii is bigger than the monarchy, and in this society, I outrank you.”

“Well, if being the Queen doesn’t matter in this room, then there is nothing stopping me from coming over there and beating your a...”

“Ok ok ok, let’s all calm down here.” Eleanor grabbed Riley’s arm, stopping her from charging at Neville. “Let’s all sit down and have a rational conversation, weighing out the pros and cons of an alliance.” Riley and Neville both sat down and exchanged narrow glances. “Now Neville, since you have brought this proposal to the group, you will go first. Please explain to us your thought process on revisiting the alliance.”

Neville nodded and smirked at Riley. “It is clear that combining the financial security of Cordonia with the military strength of Auvernal would make us an unstoppable force. Besides, we need the extra protection given our country’s recent history.” He glared at Riley once again.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” Riley huffed.

“Look at the instability we have faced in recent years. Our crown prince abdicated, his successor, our current king, broke off a perfectly suitable engagement to marry a foreign commoner who was marred in scandal.”

“He released a statement that cleared that whole thing up. The scandal is irrelevant.” She could feel her cheeks heating up.

“Do you really think people stopped talking about it? You can’t really believe that it won’t be a part of your legacy as our Queen.”

Riley slouched down in her seat. She knew she should remain composed, but bringing up the Tariq scandal hit a nerve that she didn’t know still existed. One of her biggest concerns in continuing her relationship with Liam, and accepting his proposal, was that his success as King would be overshadowed by the scandal she had faced. She had thought that after all these years, it would have been forgotten, but Neville bringing it up just brought everything back up and made her realize it would be something that was attached to her name forever.

“Besides the personal problems our royal family has faced, there have been multiple attempts to overthrow them just within our own country. Sons of Earth, Duke Godfrey, Barthelemy Beaumont, just to name a few. Other countries are seeing this, and it won’t be long before they try to come for us as well.” Neville continued.

“While I don’t agree with his delivery, Lord Neville does make some valid points.” Emmeline interjected, the rest of the room began murmuring in agreement. Riley couldn’t hide her shocked expression as she felt tears start to build up in her eyes. She blinked them away, she was not going to give them the satisfaction of seeing their queen cry.

Eleanor took back control of the room before turning to Riley. “Riley, would you like to counter? You and Liam worked directly with Auvernal during the marriage alliance talks, you clearly have some insight that we may not be privy to.”

Riley took a deep breath to get her emotions under control before standing to address the room. “Aside from the fact that Bradshaw and Isabella are deplorable people with hell spawn children, the main reason that we decided an alliance was not in the best interest of Cordonia, was because it was clear that their interest was not an alliance, but a hostile takeover of our country.”

“Perhaps we would prosper under their rule. I haven’t heard of any coup attempts in Auvernal, it seems to me like they’re doing something right.” Neville spoke up.

“So that’s it then? You all think Bradshaw and Isabella would do a better job as your king and queen, so I’m just supposed to convince Liam to relinquish the throne?” Riley threw her hands up in frustration and stepped away from the table.

“Your majesty, we’re not making the final decision right here, right now, we just want to remain open to the idea and explore some options.” Emmeline tried to talk Riley down. “Perhaps you and King Liam could take a meeting with them, a friendly lunch maybe, just to open the lines of communication.”

“This is ridiculous. I can’t believe you all expect me to agree with this!” Riley was now pacing the room, overcome with a nervous energy.

Eleanor stood and lifted a hand to quiet the room. “Alright, that’s enough. I think we’ve gotten as far as we’re going to get with this conversation tonight. Dinner is being set out in the dining hall. I suggest we adjourn for the day. Let’s all compose ourselves and think about all sides of this conversation. We will pick up the conversation at the next meeting.”

As the members started filing out of the room, Eleanor approached Riley and gently placed her hand on her arm to keep her still. “Are you alright Riley?”

Riley shrugged Eleanor’s hand off of her, anger clear on her face. “Of course I’m not alright. I basically just had a room full of my subjects telling me that my husband and I are doing a shitty job, and they think those monsters are better suited to look out for their best interests. Of course I’m not fucking alright!” Riley moves in closer, lowering her voice but not losing any of the anger in her tone. “I thought you were here doing this to protect Liam. Do you really think that this is protecting him? Handing his kingdom over to Auvernal?!”

“Riley, I always have Liam’s best interests at heart, I promise you that. Why don’t you head home, take a couple of days to relax and take everything in. I will set up a meeting for you and I later this week to talk about everything and work out a game plan.”

“Fine, I can’t stay here anymore anyway. And I definitely don’t have an appetite for dinner.” Riley walked out of the room, looking for Mara so that they could get back to the palace. She stepped into the dining area and saw Mara standing in the far corner talking to Neville. She clenched her jaw and took a deep breath before approaching the pair. “Mara, we will not be staying for dinner. We are returning to the palace immediately. I want to be home to put my daughter to bed.” She wasn’t going to give Neville the satisfaction of knowing she was leaving because of what he started.

“Of course, your majesty.” Mara nodded and exited with Riley.

The ride home was silent. In all the years that Mara had worked for Riley, she had never seen her this upset. She wasn’t entirely sure how to handle it, or what would be considered overstepping her duties, so she decided to stay quiet and let Riley speak, if she wanted to. She didn’t.

They arrived at the palace and walked together to the royal quarters. As Riley placed her hand on the doorknob to enter, Mara cleared her throat to get her attention. “Your majesty, I know this was a difficult evening for you, but I do feel I need to remind you that discretion is key in the Via Imperii. His majesty cannot know what happened tonight. You will need to lock those feelings away for the time being.”

Riley pressed her lips into a thin line and nodded. She knew she was going to fall into Liam's arms and cry the second she saw him, and then she would tell him everything, but she couldn’t let Mara know that. “Liam and I will be staying in for the rest of the night. You are dismissed for the evening.” Riley walked into her quarters and shut the door before Mara had a chance to respond.

As soon as she closed the door, she leaned back against it and dropped her head into her hands. Liam came walking into the room, the smile that appeared on his face when he heard the front door open quickly faded as he took in the sight of his wife sobbing at the front door. “Riley?” She looked up at him, tears streaming down her face as she tried to catch her breath. He rushed over to her and pulled her close, she buried her head in his chest as he stroked her hair and kissed the top of her head trying unsuccessfully to soothe her. “Shhhh, it’s alright love, I’m right here, I’ve got you. Tell me what happened.”

Riley could barely speak, but she slowly tried to explain everything that had happened that night. Liam walked her to the couch as she spoke, she needed to sit, anything to help her relax and calm down. He stared at her in disbelief as he listened to his wife tearfully recap her evening.

On the other side of the door, Mara pulled her phone out of her jacket pocket, selecting one of the contacts and bringing the phone to her ear. “My lord, you were right. We will need to put your plan in motion.”

Permatag:

@anjanettexcordonia @athena-penrose @bbrandy2002 @chemist-ana @choicesficwriterscreations @choiceskatie @cordonia-gothqueen @cordoniaqueensworld @emkay512 @gabesmommie1130 @gkittylove99 @hopelessromanticmonie @iaminlovewithtrr @jessiembruno @kat-tia801 @khoicesbyk @kingliam2019 @lucy-268 @marshmallowsaremyfavorite @mile9213 @mom2000aggie @pixie88 @queenrileyrose @secretaryunpaid @sweatyrysconnoisseur @tessa-liam @theroyalheirshadowhunter @twinkleallnight @txemrn

Sapere Aude:

@burnsoslow @busywoman @gardeningourmet @ofpixelsandscribbles

Liam x Riley:

@jared2612

Liam:

@amandablink @yourmajesty09

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gwendeeagain · 3 years ago

Text

How I wrote the Demon fic

Don't draw devil's traps in janitors' closets is one of my longest fic series I’ve ever written, the most notable of which would be my Demon Gakushuu fic, if you’ve seen it.

In partial response to an ask post (link here), I’ve decided to revisit my writing of this fic series! It was quite a long journey for me and I think it might be fun (?) sharing it with everyone. It’s rather long, so I’ll tag it under “keep reading”.

FYI this thread contains major spoilers for the fic (and would honestly make no sense if you do not have prior knowledge of it).

I'll just refer to the first fic in the series as Books because it has an insanely long title. Subsequent fics are in order Burgundy, Potential, Illuminate, Illuminate rewrite, and Addendum. The main series is linked here.

Addendum is not linked in the main series for reasons I'll explain below. (link here)

Books

I think one of my biggest mistakes writing Books is my lack of plot planning, and subsequently how thematically inconsistent it became. I start off most my fics with a rough idea of how I want the story to end, and a few good themes to carry me through the plot as I write, but for Books I started off with the first chapter and nothing else. If you followed the notes of my fic you'd probably have witnessed my gradual descent into uncertainty and despair as the fic spiralled out of my control due to how wrong I felt it was becoming.

The fic took a surprisingly hard toll on me. I absolutely hated it. I refused to mark it as complete because I was dissatisfied with how it ended. I thought that everyone was out of character, that I lost the original ending and goal in my head, that it was thematically messy such that I couldn't justify any ending I tried to come up with, and I was just grasping at straws trying to make it work.

The three things that bothered me were Gakushuu’s wings, Koro-Sensei and the introduction of Aina. When I started this fic I had plans to kill off Koro-Sensei at the end, however as the fic went on it became a celebration of life and learning how to live, and I knew I couldn’t bring myself to have any death in this fic... but at the same time I had Gakushuu find a lot of meaning in Koro-Sensei’s (to-be) death and I didn’t want to undo that. The wings were on a similar note, because Gakushuu spend 50k words finding out who he is and accepting that he was different. Turning that message around and making him go back to being “the same” ate me up inside, but at the same time I set-up the Demon Society in such a way that they would kill Gakushuu if he didn’t have his wings, and it’s supposed to be a happy ending, dammit! Aina was a particularly egregious case because I threw her (and Ikeda) in without any prior warning at the very last minute. I already had a whole world and setting planned for them which I never got to expand on in the previous chapters because I was so anxious about the other two points, and when it came down to the last chapter I realized I had no set-up for these two, who were supposed to be major players in the finale. Basically I was bad at writing.

Even now I cannot fully articulate why it was terrible for me, but compounded with my real-life stressors, I suppose it just became a bit too much to deal with. (This is a piece of fiction that I am creating from scratch. If I can't even get this under control, what hope do I have for everything else?)

((For come disclosure I was never formally diagnosed with any mental illness, but my parents are the sort of people who don’t believe mental illness exists anyways. I would say that I’ve had depressive episodes when I was younger and sometimes even now, but I’ve learnt my ways of dealing with them!))

Burgundy

Four days later I published Burgundy, a short sequel to Books, very shortly after only because I had already finished writing by that time. I actually do still have several half-finished follow ups at that point, but I couldn't bring myself to complete any sequels because I couldn't even come to terms with the ending of the main story. (Those wips are lost to me now.) I think I was hoping that forcing myself to publish the sequel would show me that it was "no big deal" that the main fic didn't end the way I hoped it would, but it succeeded in making me feel worse.

Potential

About one month after that I wrote Potential. It was a three parter, somehow a fifth of the length of the main fic, that followed Gakuhou's perspective prior to the events of Books. It was a prequel which imo made it easier to write, because I still couldn't move on from Books yet. I think writing Potential was me trying to remind myself why I wrote Books in the first place, to perhaps reignite my original passion for the series. It's kind of funny to think about in hindsight, and a little meta, because Potential was a lead up to the events in Books. It worked... a little bit, I think. I still couldn't reconcile my feelings for the whole thing, but through it I got to revisit the original premise that I fell in love with and expand more on worldbuilding it. I could reprise Aina and Ikeda and finally write about the world I planned to introduce them in in the first fic and give more context and insights to how the demon society was supposed to work.

Illuminate

Six months after Potential, I ran into a comment that said, "what would Gakuhou have done if Gakushuu had died?" And for some reason it struck an epiphany in me. After that I wrote Illuminate in one night, cried myself to sleep, waited one more night to proofread it, and then published it. Illuminate was an AU to the first three fics in the series, and it was a fic about grief and mourning. Spoiler alert: I straight up killed Gakushuu in that fic. And somehow that was what I needed.

I quite literally killed my first fic - I upended the terrible ending I hated from Books - everything I had been uncertain about at first? I killed it. Plot points didn't fit my original plans? Killed it. (When I reread the death scene, I... honestly think I was unnecessarily cruel. I must have really been out of my mind when I wrote it, hah!)

And then I wrote myself a love story about missing it, grieving it, and finally letting go of it. It was heart wrenching for me - I made Gakuhou cry about what he lost, what could have been, what he realized he loved, and at the end of it all he could say "I love you and I can move on from you." And I did!

Illuminate (Rewrite)

Illuminate Rewrite, one year later, was me revisiting Illuminate to reflect on myself where I've come with this series. I actually just swapped the places of two paragraphs to change the mood at the end for something more contemplative. I elaborated a bit more on this in my notes for Rewrite, so I won't repeat them here.

Honestly, I still have a hard time coming back to reread Illuminate even after the whole debacle has happened. I attached a lot of emotions through my journey with this, and revisiting it each time takes quite a bit out of me.

Addendum

Addendum was just me having fun! After Illuminate, I managed to reconcile my feelings with the fic series. I was finally able to mark Books as complete and move on from it, and afterwards I wrote a fun little au sequel to Illuminate so that Gakushuu can live again. I could creatively expand on ideas and just do... whatever! It's more of a loose connection of plot points than a real fic, honestly.

Addendum follows Gakushuu in a future hundreds of years later, after every human who he's once known in Books has died. And... he moves on! Gets a job, makes friends, lives his life, and most importantly move on.

I chose to publish in a separate collection, however, because it was an incomplete story and I didn’t want to have a half-complete fic tacked on to what I have settled in my heart as a complete fic collection.

And that’s about it! <3

#karushuu #gakushuu asano #gwentriestothink

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lebritneeey · 4 years ago

Text

Second Chance (3/??)

inspired by don’t wanna cry, lie again and second life & a little idea from reply 1997 and 1988.

genre: romance. fluff, angst, love rivals etc lmao

pairing: y/n x ??? (svt)

a/n: hi guys! so my imagination started running after listening to dwc, lie again and second life on repeat lmao. i’ve always love reading angsty fics and so i came up with this series based on these three songs! disclaimer!! if there’s any similarity with other fics, it is coincidental, everything written here is based on my idea! no to plagiarism!! also, pics and gifs here are NOT mine! hope you guys enjoy this series i might be posting this on aff too so don’t be alarm if you come across it on aff! enjoy!

SERIES MASTERLIST

What if you could get a second chance at love? What if it was the wrong time but the right person all along? Would you take it? This second chance?

Meet y/n, a 25 year old girl who had to revisit the city she once loved, Seoul. It was a city filled with both good and bad memories for her. When she left, she swore never to return. But here she is, back in Seoul, hoping to not run into a certain old flame that might reopen old wounds and remind her of how broken hearted she was back then.

chapter 2 | chapter 3 | chapter 4

chapter 3: she’s back?

nov 2020, seoul, 1:39pm (KST)

Y/n’s eyes widened as she froze. Choyi and Hana gasped as they stared at the three familiar faces in front of them.

Seventeen Dino, Mingyu and Jeonghan were picking up their coffee orders for the rest of the group.

“Oh! Noona!” Dino and Mingyu chimed as they greeted her excitedly. They turned to Hana and Choyi, waving at them as well.

Jeonghan’s eyes was fixated on Y/n, his gaze turning soft.

“Hi, Y/n.. long time no see.”

////

The members sat down with the girls as they waited for their orders. Jeonghan took a seat opposite Y/n who anxiously drank her coffee while silence filled the air.

“..long time no see noonas!” Dino broke the silence. Mingyu joined in, “yeah, it’s been a few years!” Hana broke into a smile, nodding. “Yes, it’s been a while.. Heard Seventeen has been getting first place recently! Congratulations!” Choyi agreed, “This year is really you guys’ year! Congrats!”

While the four of them chatted away, Jeonghan constantly fixed his gaze onto Y/n. He gently asked, “how have you been?” Y/n looked up from her drink as she forced a smile. “I’m.. good. You?”

Jeonghan chuckled, “well you know, busy as always. We’re preparing for our upcoming tour.” Y/n nodded, taking a sip of her drink again.

“You still looked the same from the last time I saw you. Beautiful always.” Y/n blinked in surprise, cheeks turning slightly red at the statement. She said nothing and continued looking at her coffee. Silence filled the air once more.

////

“Ah, lunch time is over, we gotta go now.” Hana said as the girls stood up to leave. “Aw, that’s sad. But we had fun catching up noona!” Dino chirped as he waved them goodbye with Mingyu beside him doing the same. Just as Y/n was about to follow them out, Jeonghan gently grabbed her wrist. “Y/n!” She turned and stared at him, brows raising.

He let go and rubbed his neck awkwardly. “Um.. how long are you going to be in Korea for? We should all catch up soon, the rest of the guys missed you and they would be delighted to see you again.”

Y/n pursed her lips together, hesitating. “If I’m free.” She gave the three guys a small smile before leaving the cafe.

Jeonghan sighed as he watched her leave. Damn it, I never thought I would miss her this much.

////

“Hyung.. should we tell the rest that we saw y/n again?” Dino asked in their van. The three were on the way back to the company with their coffee orders in their hands.

“I don’t know.. We need to prepare for the tour soon, y/n’s return might affect some of them.” Jeonghan rubbed his face, feeling a tad stressed.

“I think we should tell them. What if they bumped into y/n on the streets again like today?” Mingyu chipped in. “Aigoo hyung, Seoul isn’t that small you know.” Dino shooked his head as he replied Mingyu who pouted and continued texting on his phone.

Jeonghan stared outside the window as he sighed once more. If fate allows it, then we will all meet again. He thought as the car ride continued in silence all the way back to the company.

////

Flashback to march 2017, 3:53pm, PLEDIS building

Choyi, Hana and Y/n looked around in awe as they walked around the building of PLEDIS Entertainment, home to Seventeen, NU’EST and After School. Hana’s boyfriend had invited the girls over for lunch as he’s busy helping SVT prepare for their album comeback.

“Never in my life would I expect myself to be in freaking PLEDIS building where it’s the home to Seventeen!!!!!” Choyi whispered excitedly as she did a little dance while they were finding the practice room that Joohyeon was in. “Please calm down Choyi or else we’re gonna get kicked out for disturbance!” Hana shooked her head, Y/n chuckled as she follow the pair behind.

“Room 3.. room 3.. ah here it is,” Hana pointed at the practice room they found. The girls peeked through the windows.

Seventeen members were in formation while Joohyeon was in front showing them what seemed to be a choreography for their next title song. “Can’t believe I’m getting the very first look at the upcoming comeback dance..” Choyi sighed with pleasure as she fixated her eyes through the window panels.

“Okay, let’s take ten boys!” Joohyeon announced as he spotted Choyi’s face planted against the window. He walked over to the door and welcomed the girls. “Hi oppa” Hana gave him a hug while Y/n and Choyi waved at the members.

“Oh, hello, nice to see you all again!” Dokyeom waved as the rest of the members followed suit while they grabbed some towels and water bottles.

“Sorry to disturb but we brought some lunch for all of you!” Hana announced as Joohyeon took the bags she was carrying. “YES WE HAVE FREE FOOOOOD” Dino and Hosni jumped up and down pumping their fists with excitement. Y/n beamed, feeling a little surprised by their energy even after what seemed like hours of dance practice.

Jun ran up to Y/n after seeing her with two big bags of lunchboxes, “here let me help you with that!” Y/n gave him an appreciative smile and thanked him. “We didn’t speak much backstage that day but nice to meet you, I’m Jun! Are you a Korean by the way?”

Y/n shooked her head, “I’m from Singapore.” Jun nodded, mouth forming an ‘o’. “Wow but your Korean is good! Wait.. so does this mean you can speak chinese?”

“Yup, 我可以说中文 (I can speak chinese)“ Jun got even more excited and started conversing in chinese with Y/n as they sat down on the floor with the others as they took out the lunchboxes.

“Are.. those two speaking in Chinese?” Seungcheol asked The8 as he glanced at the pair. The8 looked over and nodded, “Y/n’s from Singapore I think so she’s able to speak chinese if I’m not wrong”

Seungcheol tilted his head as he watched Y/n laughing at something Jun was saying. Wonder what they’re talking about that is so funny.. He pouted slightly as he started eating.

“Yah Jihoon ah, where’s your Polaroid camera! This calls for some fun picture taking!” Jeonghan asked. Woozi walked over to his bag and took out the camera. Y/n noticed the Polaroid model, “oh is that the latest model?” Woozi turned to her and nodded. Y/n stood up and walked over looking at it. “Can I see it? I’ve been saving up for one cause my previous polaroid broke!” Woozi handed his camera over with a small smile.

Y/n clapped her hands enthusiastically as she gently held the camera. “Can I test it out?” Woozi chuckled as he gave her the go ahead. What Y/n did next was unexpected to the boy — she pointed the camera in front of him and snapped a pic, “say cheese!” Woozi stared blankly at the camera with surprised as he frozed. Did she just.. took a picture of me? Suddenly?

When the polaroid picture started developing, Y/n giggled as she showed Woozi. “What’s with the blank look!” Woozi stared at Y/n, feeling captivated by her adorable action. He blushed as he rubbed his neck sheepishly, “I was just surprised that’s all..” Y/n grinned as she return the camera to him. “I think I’ll get this model, thank you Jihoon!” Woozi blushed even more as she calls him by his actual name.

“Hyung, I can help us take a few pics!” Mingyu walked over, taking the camera from the flustered boy. “Woah, why are your ears so red?” Woozi shooked his head and passed the camera to Mingyu before returning to his food, “nothing, here ya go. Don’t drop it or else I’ll come after you.”

Mingyu sighed as he went around taking pictures of the entire gang. “Say kimchi everyone!!!!”

///

Nov 2020, choyi’s apartment, 4:19pm (KST)

Y/n dropped her bag onto the sofa as she plopped on it. Choyi walked to the fridge to get a bottle of soju. Y/n looked on quizzedly, “isn’t it a bit too early for alcohol?”

Choyi took two soju glasses and sat on the sofa beside Y/n. “it’s for you.” Y/n raised an eyebrow, looking at the soju, “for what?”

��In case you wanna talk about what happened out there just now?” Choyi poured the soju into the glasses and handed one to Y/n, who took it begrudgingly. “There’s no need for any talk Cho.”

“It’s been what.. two years? I just thought seeing them might you know, sparked some past memories again” Choyi shrugs as she downs her glass. “I’m okay. It’s in the past and I’ve moved on. Really, I’m fine Cho” Y/n gave a tight smile as she refilled her glass.

“Besides, I won’t be staying in Korea for long anyway. I’m just here for work and work only, after which I’m gonna head home.” Y/n took a shot of soju as she let the bitterness taste linger around her throat hoping she would let it distract her from the heavy feeling around her chest.

“... Do you still have his number saved?” Y/n blinked a few times at Choyi’s question. She would be lying if she say she has already deleted them. The truth is, she still has it. After all these years, she still has it saved onto her phone, she just couldn’t bear to delete it. All she did was renamed it to “Ignore” just in case he calls again, but he never did.

“… nope I deleted it the day I left.” Silence filled the air as Y/n took another shot of her drink.

“You know.. the guys were shocked and sad when they heard you left without saying goodbye” Choyi added as she refilled their glasses.

“I heard.. that he was upset too” Choyi continued a she took a shot.

Y/n paused as she reached for her glass. He was upset? What right did he have to be upset?

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judediangelo75 · 4 years ago

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Claws To Wings

Welcome one and all~

I did say I was going to be working on the Talith lore, so here’s another installment of that. So I did some tweaking to the storyline that Jam City had. So the first Valentine’s Day happened in 4th year instead of 5th (because you can unlock I think both Valentine’s Day TLSQs in the same year and it didn’t make too much sense to me).

Plus there are future true events that happen in 6th year, if you’re already familiar with the Without You/The Man Behind the Necklace series than you already know. During that time, Judith and Talbott are together and have been for quite some time. But before that, they have been pining after each other for years.

In my first story, “The Scent of Love to the Heart of a Loner Poet”, Talbott is coming to realizing how deep his feelings were for Judith (whose been crushing on him since 3rd year). Between then and now, those feelings have grown and they’ve been dancing around each other.

There’s gonna be some details here that are definitely gonna be new (because it’s part of a super old character reference I created for her when I first started posting about HPHM content here).

Anyway, enough rambling. On with the story! Enjoy! 💛

MC friend: David Willows ( @that-scouse-wizard )

---------------------

Talbott stood before his mirror, readjusting his tie for probably the fifth time.

He was trying to soothe his nerves. Why you may ask?

Because of the Ball.

The Valentine’s Day Ball.

In his right mind, he would avoid such social gatherings like the plague. But it’s fair to say he hasn’t been much of his right mind ever since he met her.

Judith Harris.

A Hufflepuff witch with pale gold eyes and a heart of gold to match.

He met her alongside her best friend, David Willows, early third year. When they came to him seeking help on becoming Animagi. He was quick to shut both of them down. While David glared and protested, Judith eased the bullheaded Hufflepuff and gave him a shy sad expression along with an apology for disturbing him.

At the time, he wasn’t sure why he suddenly changed his mind to help the two. But as he got older, he did realize it was because of her.

Something about Judith was familiar. And…

He didn’t like the sad look into those bright eyes…

After the two achieved their forms and helped him find his feather necklace, Judith and Talbott became closer. Even to the point where he followed her out to the cemetery and learned about her dead father, Kendrick, on the anniversary of his death.

That’s when he learned that she was a part of his past.

That single day of his childhood where he made a friend. And developed a bond on a girl who he thought was unique with her long pretty locs and Caribbean accent.

With it being their 5th year, Talbott has gone on two dates with her. Their very first date out by the Black Lake and last year on Valentine’s Day when he learned that he has deeper feelings for her outside of a friendship.

He can still remember the sweet blush on her face after he shyly gave her a kiss on the cheek after gifting her with a heart statue.

Giving her a physical representation of his heart.

He fiddled with the ring she gifted him that day. He always remembers seeing it on a black chain around her neck on occasion. Judith was a person who cares about sentimental value so it’s very likely she gifted him something that has a level importance to her. But he was so stunned when she slipped it onto his finger, and that it fitted perfectly, while announcing that it was her Valentine’s Day gift to him that he forgot to ask…

Maybe today he will. After all, after the Ball, he had a special surprise for her.

Of course, there had to be some last minute changes when he realized a certain Slytherin witch ALSO planned on using the Library and two fairies also got into a squabble. He had at least a day to make the arrangement work and the “Most Powerful Witch at Hogwarts” actually might of done him a favor.

It would be nice to revisit where their tale began.

Talbott sighed, looking over his appearance once more before turning on his heel and leaving his room.

‘I hope she likes what I planned. She’s the only who deserves to see this side of me,’ he thought as he made his way to the Great Hall.

——————

“C’mon Little Tigress! We’re gonna be late,” David huffed, knocking insistently on his best mate’s door.

“I look ridiculous! I’m not going anymore!” Came the stubborn reply from the other side. David rolled his eyes at Judith’s behavior.

They’ve been busting their asses to save the Valentine’s Day Ball from a lonely Madam Pince by using a pining Mr. Filch. However, due to all the planning and finally asking out Merula and Talbott (after Judith finally got over her initial shyness), they didn’t have time to style an outfit for themselves. So they went to the resident Style Wizard for help.

David’s pick was easy.

Judith however… not so much.

It was fair to say that Judith was more than disgruntled as she looked in the reflection for the suit Andre put together.

“You lost your damn mind Egwu if you think I’m going to the Ball like this. I look like a mom in her mid-30s looking to speak to your manager to file a complaint.”

David was on the floor in tears when he saw the offended look on the Ravenclaw wizard’s face. To be fair, the suit plus the pixie cut that Andre magically put together wasn’t doing his best mate any favors.

However, she didn’t step out to show the dress to them. She tried it on, switch back into her normal clothes, and left without much of another word.

Now David was curious to what could be wrong with Andre’s design for her to believe she looked “ridiculous”.

“C’mon Judith. What’s wrong with it? Surely it can’t be as bad as that suit Andre design,” David coaxed.

“…It’s… a lot…” David wasn’t sure what to make of that and they’re gonna be late if Judith kept this up.

“Judith, it’s either you open the door willingly to show me what you’re talking about or I break into your room to see for myself. We don’t have time for this right now,” David huffed. He didn’t want to late with for his dance with Merula.

Silence ensued and David was half considering going through with his threat when the tell tale sound of the door unlocking hit his eyes. David turned the knob and walked in.

He paused when he took in the sight of his little friend.

Judith was wearing a short black dress decorated with pink and red roses. A small slit can be found on her right leg. White 3-inch open toe heels were on her feet. Her usual ear accessories and earrings were present. A familiar dark red lipstick, dark eyeshadow, and black eyeliner made an appearance on her face. Her hair was out from its normal twists, curls and coils tumbling down her back and a bang swept over her right eye.

“David,” Judith mumbled awkwardly as her friend stared at her. That seemed to have broke the spell on the wizard as he shook his head to recollect himself.

“Well I’ll be damned… you look far from ridiculous, Judith. You look beautiful,” David said with a smile. Judith blushed and rubbed the back of her neck.

“You sure? It’s kind of revealing, don’t you think,” she asked. David cocked his head to the side, rescanning the girl from head to toe.

He could see her point, but it wasn’t as bad she probably thought it was.

The dress fitted her like glove, revealing the curves she was developing as a young woman. While the dress did show quite a bit of skin, it was still respectable.

“No, not really. To Bill and Orion, possibly but they’re big brothers who naturally want to keep every perverted wizard away from you. Hell, I may end up breaking someone’s teeth in if they think they can disrespect you like that. But you look beautiful Little Tigress, don’t think otherwise. Talbott would definitely agree with me,” David stated, watching his fellow Hufflepuff blushed at the name of the boy she’s been crushing on since third year.

David has been watching the two dance around each other since Judith admitted that she fancied the Ravenclaw wizard in the Charms classroom when practicing the Memory Charm. He was waiting for the two to finally get together already.

“If you’re done worrying, we still have a Ball to get to,” David said with a raised brow.

“But-EEP!” David already saw the protest in her eyes was quick to walk across the room and throw Judith over his shoulder. He only resorted to such measures when she was be difficult, and she was definitely being difficult.

“C’mon Little Tigress, your bird boy is waiting for you,” he said as he made his way out of her room. Judith spluttered over her words, mainly out of embarrassment at both what he said and the unnecessary position David has put her in.

“DAVID! Put me down, you brute! I’m in a dress for Merlin’s sake,” she protested loudly, wriggling in David’s unforgiving grip.

‘Damn demon lineage...’ she thought with a grimace.

“I'm well aware, we can clean you up when we're there with a spell, I not missing my chance to dance with Merula,” David said breezily. Judith gave up, allowing herself to be carried off like a sack of potatoes.

“Bloody sap... stupid dance,” she grumbled under her breath. David chuckled at her disgruntled mood.

“You’ll thank me for it by the end of the night, trust me,” he said. Judith pouted.

‘Assuming I don’t hide in a dark corner somewhere first...’

“Do that and I'm casting Lumos Maxima so there's nowhere for you to hide,” David said suddenly, nearly scaring the girl half to death. Judith mentally slapped her forehead out of exasperation.

She should know better not to think aloud around David, seeing how they’re both Legilmens.

Damn it...

“Fine,” she huffed. Luckily for her, they finally arrived near the entrance of the Great Hall. David finally set her down, and casting a spell that made her look presentable again.

David offered his arm to her.

“Shall we, Little Tigress?” Judith felt her cheeks heating up at the thought of the person waiting on her inside the Great Hall before letting out a sigh. She took her best mate’s arm.

“I guess we shall...”

-----------------------

Talbott was chatting alongside with Merula, twirling a red rose between his hands when he heard a whistle. Both turned to make out the figures of their dates not too far from them.

David separated himself from his fellow Hufflepuff to walk up to the two. David gave Talbott a smirk and nodded over in Judith’s direction before stealing Merula away.

Talbott only raised a brow at the Hufflepuff wizard’s behavior before walking up to his date for the night. As he stood in front of her, any words that he was going to say to her, died at the tip of his tongue.

Talbott stared at his date, heart racing with a blush on the high points of his cheekbones as he looked at her from her curls to her high heeled shoes. The silence was starting to unnerve the Hufflepuff witch as her long time love interest stared at her without saying anything.

“Y-you clean up quite nicely, Talbott,” she blurted. She mentally smack herself immediately afterwards.

‘When did I become this awkward, goodness…’

However, seem to have done the trick and snapped Talbott back to reality.

“S-sorry, little bird. I-I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. I-It’s just that…” Talbott shook his head, trying to focus.

“It’s just that,” Judith echoed slowly, biting her bottom lip. She was worried that David might’ve been wrong and she looked like a fool in front of the boy she had feelings for.

Talbott stepped closer to her, tilting her head up by her chin so she could look at him. He offered a shy smile.

“You look beautiful, Judith. More lovely and temperate than a summer’s day,” He said softly, placing the rose he had behind her left ear. Judith blushed as she felt her heart race at his barely there touch.

“I-I… thank you, Talbott…” The Ravenclaw wizard smiled at the shy response. Behind them the instruments started seemed to be warming up to play the first song.

“May I have this dance,” Talbott asked, mock bowing to the girl. Judith giggled behind a red manicured hand.

“You may…” Taking her hand Talbott led Judith close to the center of the dance floor, with David and Merula standing not too far from them. The fairies that were lighting up the room swirled around the students, leaving them in awe at the magical moment. In the midst of this, David gave his friend a wink, who in turned returned it with an unimpressed glare. Judith returned her attention back to her date once she felt him take one of her hands

“I’m not usually one who likes public displays, but… I quite like this one… almost as much as I like you,” Talbott quietly admitted as he looked into pale gold eyes.

‘Is it possibly to pass out from blushing so much? Because I think I’m close…’ Judith thought as she ducked her head with a smile. Talbott was being so sweet and kind to her, she wanted to be wrapped up in his arms and dance the night away.

Judith looked back up at him with a teasing grin.

“I hope you like dancing too, because it’s our time to shine…”

————————

Talbott was smiling at the laughing girl in his arms as he spun her around. The two have been in their own little bubble ever since the dance started.

Their shy exteriors melted away leaving behind something much warmer and intimate. Anyone with eyes can see that they were clearly smitten with each other. Which were plenty watching them on occasion.

Red eyes darted around the Great Hall, finding the person he was looking for. He gave the Headmaster a subtle nod which he returned with a knowing smile. Talbott stepped back from Judith to clear his throat with a smile.

“All this dancing is making me thirsty, I think I’m gonna get a refreshment,” he said. Judith smiled at him, making his heart stutter in a lovestruck sigh.

“A refreshment sounds great, actually! I’ll go with you-”

“N-no need! I-I’ll get one for you! Just... stay right there,” Talbott stuttered before taking off. Judith’s brows furrowed in confused as she watch Talbott disappear in the darkness.

Suddenly she felt a hand on her shoulder. Turning, she saw the cheery smile of David.

“Cheers, Little Tigress! I see that I was right about you enjoying yourself,” he said with a grin. Judith glared and punched his arm.

“Cheeky bastard,” she growled. David laughed good naturedly while rubbing his arm.

“I’m surprised you’re not with Synde. Seeing how eager you were to get here and be with her,” she retorted. David shrugged.

“Mer said she going to get refreshments for the both of us. She actually suggest I go find you to see how your night was so far,” David replied. Gold eyes narrow out of suspicion.

“That’s a little odd. Talbott just let to do the same thing...”

“Was it? I found it very typical of Miss Synde and Mr. Winger,” a third voice said. David and Judith turned to see the amused face of their Headmaster.

The pair chatted with Professor Dumbledore for a while when Judith noticed something was amiss.

“It’s bit awhile since Merula and Talbott went to get refreshments. Surely it can’t take that long,” Judith pondered out loud. Dumbledore smiled.

“Clever eye, Miss Harris. That’s because they’re no longer here and they personally asked me to distract you,” he chuckled. David and Judith glanced at each other before looking back up at Dumbledore.

“Professor,” David asked warily. Dumbledore chuckled.

“Mr. Willows, you can head to the library. Miss Harris... while Mr. Winger wasn’t explicit with the location for you to go to, he did say ‘Remember our first date’ as a clue. Enjoy the rest of your storybook fairytale night, you two. You deserve it,” Professor Dumbledore informed the pair with a knowing smile.

Judith blushed walking out of the Great Hall with David. The two said their goodbyes as Judith made her way outside. Transforming into her Black Sparrowhawk, she couldn’t help but wonder what Talbott had planned at the Black Lake...

-----------------

Judith landed on the shore and transformed back, only to be surprised to find who was waiting for her.

“Lily,” she asked as the little fairy flew around her, buzzing out of excitement.

What was her little friend doing all the way out here?

The magical creature took ahold of her hand, tugging her to the Boat house.

“Okay, okay, I’m coming. Just slow down, I am wearing heels after all,” she laughed gently. Judith followed the excited fairy inside only to freeze at the door way.

Standing inside was Talbott. The place looked to have been cleaned out. Numerous fairies including her own lit up the Boathouse in a soft glow. Rose petals scattered the floor, along with some candles. A large heart made up of different colored roses was hung up behind the Ravenclaw wizard. A small table with some chairs of some of the food and drinks form the Ball sat in a corner. Somewhere in the background, there was soft music playing as well.

Talbott walked up to the stunned Hufflepuff witch and took her hand.

“Happy Valentine’s Day, little bird,” he spoke softly. Judith shook her head out of disbelief.

“W-what is all this, Talbott,” she asked. The young man bit his lip.

“I-I... I may have been planning this while I was at the Owlery... I wanted to surprise you. While I did originally plan to do this in the Library, someone else had the same idea... So I’d figured the Black Lake was the next best thing. I did have some help putting this together,” Talbott admitted.

Lily buzzed, as if she was giggling at the two. Judith rose a brow at her Fairy’s cheeky behavior before chuckling.

“I just thought that... after everything you’ve done for Hogwarts, for me, you deserved a storybook romance,” Talbott said. Judith rescanned the room before offering a smile.

“I had no idea that you could be such a romantic, Talbott. But clearly you are.” Talbott blushed, scratching the back of his neck.

“I guess all that poetry paid off...”

--------

The pair sat and ate, chatting in between. Talbott giving going as far to feed Judith a bit of a cupcake. He ended blushing when he felt her lips touch his fingers tips as she let out a pleased moan.

Currently they were slow dancing in the middle of the room, listening to the music softly playing in the background.

“This is really amazing, Talbott,” Judith spoke up, daring to look up at red eyes that reminded her of rubies.

“You’re the amazing one, Judith. I was simply following my heart,” Talbott replied, squeezing her closer. That foreign yet familiar scent that clung onto the Hufflepuff filled his nose.

“O-Oh stop it. I am not,” Judith insisted with a nervous laugh. Having Talbott so close to her was causing her heart to beat faster than normal. Talbott stopped dancing in favor of holding her hands. His gaze was unwavering.

“I mean it, little bird. You made this Valentine’s Day perfect for everyone, even Flich and Pince... And especially for me,” Talbott confessed. Pearly whites flashed at him.

“All I wanted was a magical Valentine’s Day with my date,” Judith started, glancing down for a quick moment to gather herself before looking back up at Talbott through her lashes.

“...And... And I’m so happy that date is you...” And she was. Truly.

Talbott was the picture perfect gentleman. And the fact he went through great lengths to make Valentine’s Day memorable for her reminded her of happier times from her childhood. Except now it was with someone who likes her for her.

She hasn’t felt this special in years...

Talbott urged his heart to calm down as he reached for his wand.

“I feel the same way, Judith. And I... made something for you...” Stepping back, Talbott casted a spell, causing a book to appear. Judith blinked out of surprise at the book that hovered between them. Carefully reaching for it, she opened it to a random page somewhere in the beginning.

“...The loner poet listened to the Howler professed the words he wasn’t aware that lived in his heart. Speaking of a deep longing for a girl with otherworldly pale gold eyes. To never leave him because when he looks into her unique irises, he can see future. A future where he would wake up to them every morning. A future where he would look at child with the same eyes as her. A future that would lead to forever together.

He felt his heart stall in his chest, itching to cast a spell to light the Howler ablaze to prevent its words being heard by unwanted ears. It was then he smelled her before he heard her.

A hint of sea breeze that made him feel like he was standing so close the never-ending ocean. Chocolate that reminded him of her skin tone. A variety of fainter sweet scents, most he couldn’t name but the one he could pick out was honey.

Her melodious low voice sung to his eardrums:

“Hey, what did your Valentine Howler say?” He swiftly turned to find pale gold eyes curiously looking up at him. He could feel his heart speed up when he connected the dots.

It was her.

She was the one his heart longed for.

Everything that has transpired that day and this revelation became too much for the loner poet to take. He was quick to deny that his Howler hasn’t said anything, using the opportunity their teacher has created to leave the classroom.

He needed time. Time to think of what to do next...”

Judith was so engrossed in words written on the page that she didn’t realize that Talbott was now standing behind her.

“It’s not finished, more so of a... work in progress for an ongoing story...” Judith jumped a little when she felt his breath ghost over her visible ear.

“This is about you,” she whispered, releasing the book to float again. She turned to find Talbott staring down at her with half lid eyes.

“It’s about you and me, little bird,” he whispered, cupping one of her cheeks. Judith closed her eyes, leaning into his warm touch.

There was a shift in the air and she nervous but secretly excited to where this could lead...

Talbott withdrew for a moment forcing Judith to open her eyes again. She notice a heart shaped key necklace in his hand.

“What’s that,” she asked quietly.

“This is the key that unlocks the book. I made it be this way so you can wear it like a necklace. So our story would always be with you,” Talbott answered, carefully placing the it around her neck. A full body shiver raked Judith’s body when she felt the tips of his finger ghost over the sensitive skin.

“I... I never had someone put this much effort for me. To bare your feelings like this, Talbott... I... I don’t know what to say,” Judith confessed quietly. She could barely hear her own voice over the roar of blood rushing to her face combined with the sound of her heartbeat pounding against her eardrums.

Talbott caressed her cheek again.

“I don’t expect an answer from you right away little bird. I’m more than happy to do this for you. You’re the only one who deserves to see this side of me...” Talbott leaned closer aiming to place a kiss on her cheek. Much like he did last year.

What Judith did next surprised both of them.

Turning her head ever so slightly, she caught Talbott’s lips with her own. This stunned the pair, both remaining motionlessly for a few moments. Just as the Ravenclaw wizard was about to pull back, Judith held him there by his tie, pressing against him. Her painted lips moved against his unresponsive ones slowly, testing the waters and his resolve.

After a moment of deliberation, Talbott gave in and returned the unexpected kiss. With one hand cupping her face, its twin finding refuge on her lower back, pushing her closer still. Judith released his tie in favor of wrapping her arms around his neck, melting in his embrace. Both of them were placed under a cloudy haze as their lips continued to move against one another.

The pair broke apart for air, foreheads resting against one another. Talbott silently licked his lips, picking up the taste of vanilla.

‘She tastes just as sweet as she looks. Good Gods help me...’ came the helpless thought as he found himself at the end of Judith’s sultry stare.

‘What are you doing to me, Talbott? Why do I feel this way towards you...’

“Happy Valentine’s Day, Talbott,” Judith whispered, placing a soft kiss against the corner of his lips. Talbott shivered at the sound of her voice, which has dipped down an octave. Her accent came out, loud and clear. His hands, which has migrated to her waist, squeezed down on the curve for a few seconds.

He could listen to her speak to him like this for hours...

“Happy Valentine’s Day, Judith... Thank you for being my valentine...” Judith let out soft chuckle, pulling him in for another kiss.

In the midst of this an involuntary thought passed through her mind. One which would shatter the Hufflepuff witch later on.

‘I love you, Talbott...’

-------------------

Some time has passed since the Valentine’s Day Ball. Judith more or less went back to her life as per usual.

With occasional outing with Talbott when classes and working for Rakepick became too much for her.

It was late at night and she was at the shore of the Black Lake, practicing her spellwork. She always wanted to remain sharp on her skills and it was a way for her to prepare for the upcoming O.W.L.S., which was approaching fast.

She decided to practice the Patronus Charm, seeing how she hasn’t casted it in awhile.

“Expecto Patronum!”

What came out of the tip of her wand shocked her.

Instead of her usual Siberian Tiger was a-

“G-Golden E-Eagle?!” Her eyes watched as the avian predator flew above her before disappearing.

She shocked her head, not believing what she just saw.

Over and over again, she casted the spell, waiting to see her beloved tiger. Only to watch the animal that came out soar its wings above her.

Her legs gave out from beneath her.

“No, no, no! How can this be happening?! Patronuses don’t change,” she panicked. A vague memory came resurfaced in her mind.

“Though I have heard of Patronuses changing forms after falling in love...” Judith’s eyes widen.

That voice belonged to Tonks when they were dealing with the Dementor threat from last year.

Another memory surfaced, however, much older...

“Gift this ring to the one your heart desires above all others. It will only fit and accept that one person, anyone else, it’ll reject and return to you...” Tears ran down her cheeks. When she realized what memory it was.

“Gran-Gran...” came the broken whisper. Her grandmother gifted her a magical blue and silver ring before she died. The same ring she gave to Talbott just a year prior. She didn’t remember her dear grandmother’s words when she gave it to him.

Now that she thought about it, the ring never returned to her. And it was on Talbott’s left ring finger the night of the Ball.

Even as she kissed him, those three words that haunted her since childhood has crossed her flowery dazed mind.

She couldn’t do anything but face the truth. To speak the words that haunted her in form of a Boggart from third year.

“I love Talbott Winger...”

And she was secretly terrified.

Because she knew if he were to confess the same, she was done for.

Her heart would be his.

And risk breaking if he were to ever leave...

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