#I am so sorry this is crap
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#art#fat positivity#body positivity#positivity#birblr#canary#doodle#Sorry I'm a bit all over the place at the moment guys#Had to spend time with my partner's fatphobic family#And I know I'm a thin guy so I am not like directly hurt by the things they believe#But it still was just an awful experience and I'm still kinda feeling that#And it infuriates me that me standing up for what's right is always framed as me being a delicate sensitive anorexic#You should treat fat people nice because they are people and deserve basic decency#I am not being overly sensitive by not wanting to hear your fatphobic crap#You're just not nice people#/rant over#Sorry for my little outburst guys! I am usually an easy going guy#I just get really riled up about this stuff#Fat people are wonderful and it is such a blessing to live in a world with such a huge range of different bodies!
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don't care for me now that i have to go
[ i'll be with you sooner than you know ]
#im so very sorry i am an angst peddler at heart#my arty crap#arkeresia#yakuza#kiryu#like a dragon#8#like a dragon infinite wealth#gaiden
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I wish more people were normal about POC, and specifically black, characters in the MCYT fandom. I mean, for obvious reasons related to CCs and all that, but also bc I often feel like I’m doing something wrong because sometimes I’m one of the only people I know how is getting like? Stimming flappy arms excited about my favourite black characters? It’s not like I’m singling them out either I get the exact same way about my favourite non black characters?
It’s jarring to get into skyjacks and see almost equal amounts of art of Jonnit as everyone else because I’ve been in this weirdly passively racist fandom for so long. People are so weird about like CANON (silly canon but) biggri and they make them weirdly toxic when they were so sweet. If it was Scar and Grian you people would be all over it. And dude fucking whatever happened to the way people drew Ponk. And, it’s not even just black ccs and characters. Don’t get me started on the way a lot of Dteam fans back in the day (and still some qsmp fans) talk about Asian women like Tina.
#obv if you’re black your input is more important than mine#this is just important to me because a lot of my favourite characters and CCs are black and this fandom treats them like crap#and obviously??? because black people matter generally??? even if I wasn’t really into their content I still would be upset#I don’t watch tina! I don’t watch p0nk anymore! I can still feel angry about this!#and you should be too#sorry including Tina in there makes this flow weird she’s Asian oops#sorry I am. so tired
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#bill cipher#the book of bill#Scalene cipher#euclid cipher#euclydia#book of bill spoilers#bills parents#Throwing in my random piece of bill brainrot <3#Might edit this to replace it with a much better version later??? Idk i barfed this onto a canvas so i could remember it…#It bill shaped :D#I dont make comics that often so this really sucks sorry fandom#I swear i can draw-#My 3 AM brain hates this so its prolly crap#gravity falls
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he still has his tonsils. by the way if you even care
#sorry this is fucking UNINTELLIGIBLE but unfortunately i’m still on my bullshit about dr. daddyissues. yeah it’s gonna be all month#i am rotating episode 2.8 ‘the mistake’ in my head at breakneck speed. i am gnawing on it i want to swallow it#oh he’s such a lying liar who lies. charming little bastard. would rather die/lose his license than express one wholly unaffected emotion#‘he thinks not giving a crap makes him like house. like it’s something to aspire to’ quick question HOW serious do the daddy issues have to#be before you start latching on to fucking GREGORY HOUSE as a paternal figure and role model. really#even cameron is not down this bad. even WILSON is not down this bad.#the daddy issues of it all are very understandable though because even setting aside whatever went down back in childhood that shit his#father did to him in seasons 1-2 is SO messed up. jesus#imagine traveling all the way across the world to the hospital your son works in for a consult which confirms what you already knew: you’re#going to die of cancer in like 2 months. making a whole point out of stopping by to visit your son. not telling him what’s going on.#letting him spend a whole episode’s worth of time gradually coming to terms with his complicated feelings towards you (complicated on#account of a whole childhood of objectively awful parenting). the kid finally is able to try reaching back out to you. after YOU initiated#the contact in the first place. how do you react? well obviously by telling him ‘oh sorry i actually have to get in a taxi right now’ and#fucking back off to the other side of the world without giving him a chance to actually talk to you at all and resolve any of the emotions#you just dredged up. oh by the way you still haven’t fucking told him you’re about to die and in fact actively mislead him into thinking#he’s going to have the chance to try meeting with you again next time he visits your home country.#especially fucked up given that the whole reason it DID take your son so long to come around THIS time is that he feels like every time#he’s tried reaching out to you in the past you’ve just disappointed him by refusing to put in the effort to meet him there.#And Now Here We Are Again.#rowan what the FUCK is wrong with you. i want to dig you up and kill you again#house md#robert chase#caseyposting
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Not to be shippy on main but why does everyone go in for tsundere fx and "nuisance to society" jy when their every interaction screams the opposite. Fx is logical and realistic enough to be more than well-acquainted with how she feels and is extremely devoted to her work (and subsequently the general) and on the opposite hand jy is incredibly selfless and caring towards her (literally the first time they met he told her he'd take the blame when she suggested they frickin commit a war crime in order to win the Abundance War). Like yeah teasy jy is amusing or whatever but realistically that wouldn't be in the droves y'all think it would and fx would probably laugh at it the few times it might happen more than she'd get all tsundere-y about it
She's not emotional. That's the difference. She doesn't have emotional outbursts. She's extremely calm and rational and she's dealt with jy for more than long enough to become extremely used to his antics and she wouldn't take them nearly so seriously.
They're PINERS. They're pining and it's obvious. They watch each other from across the room when they think the other isn't looking and they leave each other nice little notes at work because both of them overwork themselves and need breaks. I am COOKING here
#honkai star rail#jingfu#hsr jing yuan#hsr fu xuan#i am so wise for this#fu xuan is 100% a secret hopeless romantic and i will die on this hill#jing yuan is also the type to literally never shut up about it if they got married#he wouldn't go two seconds without “did i tell you that's my wife”#yukong resists the urge to put an arrow in his skull but she's nice about it#i also like the idea that while the two of them are eternally denying everything the entirety of the luofu is on pins and needles#every single person on that blasted ship is glaringly aware and they're just waiting at this point#when something inevitably happens everybody's frickin ecstatic because jeesh it only took y'all 30 literal years#i wasn't gonna post this but then i remembered that i told myself 2024 would be the year i stopped giving a crap#expect me to fly off the handle a little in this year of our Lord#shy i'm sorry in advance
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lmao they finally condemned the shed behind my apartment i’m losing it
#the shed has no door#the back wall is falling apart#it is full of actual rats#and theres like old house crap stuffed in there. like i am so sorry it is about time#i am so tired of living next to rat hell
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deleted Instagram from my phone just a few days back and have literally spent every day w my feet in a creek before work and every evening cooking a beautiful and sumptuous dinner and discovered new music and got a workout routine going again and have gone on 2 dates w my husband and went tubing w all my friends plus some new ones….. ok I didn’t know this was what y’all were talking about!!!!!!!!!!!!! everyone go spend an hour in the morning in a folding chair in the middle of ur local creek reading a book and watching a hawk bathe NOW NOW NOW I AM NOT KIDDING!!!!
#I had a breakdown about life being so hard and how it cannot possibly be supposed to feel like this and snapped#like how does everyone not kill themselves all the time sorry#but then I realized I am living in complete comparison to others and performing all the time to an audience that couldn’t care less#and I am my worst enemy#and I stopped being on my phone and holy crap!!!!!#the bad brain is in there!!!!!
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Hey people, just W.I.T.C.H. trivia, you know that in his youth, the Oracle was actually called Himer, but after spending so much time in position, and being changed a great deal, he is now just sort of Himer-ish
#i am sorry#yes i did#i feel like this is a thing you post at 2am and not in the noon#but you know i am rarely awake at 2am so i need to do such crap in daylight#w.i.t.c.h.#himerish#basiliade#trial of the oracle#i actually thought of this a long time ago but now i opened it to Lumiy-a in comments and i had to share with the world
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i do not like thanksgiving (week)
#1. late november? it’s Dark. all the time. pure darkness#also my dad is neurotic for no reason about the electricity bill despite how much money he spends on random other crap#and he will get really nasty with you if you leave a light on for one nanosecond longer than it needs to be on#so like only if you’re in the room which means the house is dark all the time and you’re expected to just walk around like that#even though having a light on at your destination if you’re moving back and forth helps#like sorry i don’t want to feel depressed and sleepy all the time#2. family over means i have to socialize even though i straight up have nothing to say#i think this one is self explanatory i think we all know the feeling of having to perform around relatives and to be friendly#i really do try my best i’m not like a hardcore introvert i’m just boring and easily bored#if i have nothing to say but i am expected by law to be present at the gathering#i will cope with looking awkward by constantly snacking on whatever food is present#so i just eat like a ton of crackers or whatever over several hours#and i feel like absolute crap#like blehhh wdym peanut m&ms will make your body annoyed at you#3. i can’t cook i’ll be so real so i can’t even feel like i’m being helpful#i would gladly help out i’ll just always need someone to hold my hand and i’ll be in the way#so it’s better for me to stay away#but then it looks like i’m just lazy#or again antisocial#and then that means i gotta do cleanup and dishes#4. going back to the Darkness and sleepiness. all of the above things are bad enough over say christmas#but at least then i can relax bc the semester is over it’s a real break#but thanksgiving? man i am still busy. i have to work from home. i am stressed#my instinct is to hibernate and relax bc of the darkness and holiday vibe#however i’m not allowed to#but it’s hard to be productive#harder still when you have to operate under someone else’s rules#peach rambles
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crying whenever i talk about Cookie9 because all my friends have these interesting and unique theories on them while i take everything too literally and they all just stare at me like “dude… uuugh we r TIRED” <-they dont actually say this they are very kind to me but i can Feel It
#my version of them is centered around their blog version with the ‘personality’ of their steam review and like a bunch of HC#i developed them with the implication that they’re Real but i’m a bit iffy on it#because all my friends have theories about how they’re from the narrator’s consciousness which is sick as hell#and i’m unsure how to actually structure everything or if i should go the same route so i can get approval from them </3#my friends r the real reviewer fans even though they dont plague themselves over them every day and im so sad that i don’t know anythinggg#gggggggggggg#like im p sure they genuinely hate the stuff i make about cookie9 and im just. scrumbles myself. sorry im Trying :( i’m not smart#or good at writing or even media literate#whatever that term means#all i have is love in my heart for them i don’t know anything at all#ouhghghhg they hate It so much but i cant do anything else and it’s all i have#like all my cookie9 stuff works on the ‘what if their blog self Was Real’ but i’m not actually sure how to fit it all into my actual parabl#stuff because i still havent worked out how my parable itself works#and people probably don’t think i know enough and i don’t think they’ll approve if i try. so i Don’t#tempted to blame this on my like. general crushing lack of intelligence caused by both physical and mental reasons#but i want to believe i could do better if i try? but that’s incredibly hopeful#i’ll be stuck here forever i think#<-guy who. whenever Anything wrong happens ever. just goes back to ‘oh yeah its because im dumb as fuckign rocks. due to the Incidents’#i am very scared of the possibility that it is possible for me to be anything more because that implies that i’m stupid because i didnt try#even though i’m trying very very fucking hard and every time i get something wrong way more than anyone else i’ve ever known#and they hate me for it . MAN!!!!!!!!!#<-brain is lying 2 me i think nobody hates me or . whatever. it still feels like it though im just saying this because i dont want anyone t#think people genuinely hate me for being stupid. i mean. people DO. but not my friends ☝️#man i can’t even get into the buglivia crap either because she is so abstracted from her actual review#girl w identity issues and also the general normal Changing A Lot Through Time. i scrumble her. around#her Self during 2018 would in fact be in character for the review.i want to draw her during that time. she took everything so seriously </3#tbh my version of her does react well to TSP humor but at the time she felt like she wasn’t allowed 2 Do Her Thing and tried to seem#more professional and Normal and it seeped into EVERYTHING for a bit#cookie9 though just genuinely found the narrator annoying and patronizing. its just not his thing and thats fine#<-random nonsensechemical reviewer bits hidden inside the vents. SEND POST.
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A. Kirkland- Pitbrow Woman, '81
In the last month or so, my interest in nyo!England has blossomed. Yet, I have long disliked the canon stylization of the character.
Ms. Alice Kirkland has never been one to shy away from physical labor or the harsh realties of her own people. Even at the height of her international power, it was rare that- unless directly requested by the monarch or prime minster- that she lived among the aristocrats for long periods of time. A stark difference between her and her French counterpart. While her rebellious days as a sailor were behind her, throughout the 1800s it was not uncommon to find her either in the mines, in a factory, or tending to her own country estate farm.
References and Inspirations bellow cut, Programs used: MS Paint and Krita
I could not have done any of this without these references.
#don't zoom in to close are you will see all my fucks ups that I just gave up trying to fix lamo#Things I googled for this “when did large industrial chains become common”#It's 1880 btw#worked so longer to figure out patterns only for it not to show up at all on the apron#and I am so sorry to all plaid lovers and all of Ireland and Scotland#I have shakey hands and my lines turned out horrible but by the time I saw how bad it looked I was on day 3 and was in to deep to change it#she is standing on the rocks cus she like to be tall#but man the first ref. photo has helped me learn how to draw arms and shit#bless it#fingers and face shape are the things I for sure how to keep working at#the ankle to the foot as well#lots of crap actually#god this is so bad haha but Im tired of looking at it#she is still a colonist not good person shithead#alice kirkland#hetalia#hws england#historical hetalia#hws france#hws#my art#hetalia fanart#hetalia axis powers#aph england#hws alice kirkland#MS Paint#krita#nyotalia#hws nyo england#nyo England
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announcement.
hi guys—ik i’ve been inactive on here for a while + my oopsie with thinking it was niki’s bday a couple of days earlier 🤡 i haven’t been on tumblr for a while not because of embarrassment or anything (lol feel free to clown me too)
but after careful consideration (aka after legit mistaking what day it was), things kinda got put into perspective for me. i had been running on 3ish hours of sleep the whole week due to midterms + dealing w several migraines.. i kinda realized that my brain was uhh not okay to mistake dec 5th for dec 9th 😭😭 plus having already been to the hospital in the past for previous health reasons, i realized i should probably take care of myself and focus on my priorities, so i will be taking a needed break until january! i’m so so sorry to disappoint anyone waiting for the fics i promised to post, but they will be released when i return :)
thank you
jae
happy actual bday to riki (and late bday to sunghoon)<333
#im sorry to keep being so inconsistent#but to be frank i think i am too far drained and don’t wanna die lol#i realize now that i can’t keep forcing myself to write or remember to post something constantly#aka keep this account alive for the time being with all my crap going on
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A completely normal process video that is definitely very informative and high quality and has no audio 💞
#please be nice to me i am so ahhhhh posting this lol#i really am so sorry the quality is crap but such is life with tumblr#gvf#greta van fleet#danny wagner#myart#greta van art#'bYe LiOnEl'#take a shot every time i say yeah or star
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scenes i hope to see in heartstopper season 2! feel free to tag along
#i made this a while ago and forgot to post it#now that we have a teaser you can have it#i am so excited#sorry the quality is crap#heartstopper#heartstopper season 2#heartstopper bingo#my posts
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Okay...hate that I have to say this...but if I do not know you or you're not a mutual, and you send me a message not in ask (sometimes even in asks for certain reasons)...I will NOT respond to you.
Not coz I'm being an ass. More coz maybe I'm too exhausted to answer, or I don't feel comfortable, or I'm feeling extra social anxiety that day, or I just don't feel like succumbing to being guilted and/or borderline harassed.
I am going through some shit right now, and I am not in the capacity to be at my 100%, or without likely snapping at someone, which i don't wanna do. Please respect that.
#void talks#nic talks#life crap#i am only saying this coz i have gotten a lot of messages lately that i do not have the spoons to deal with#half of them are guilt trip central#or even sound like bots#so yeah#just...no#I'm sorry coz i do wanna talk to people here and there#but I'm am going through it
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