#I am not here to have a good time but to be entertained
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kathlare · 3 days ago
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between the quite moments
Lando Norris x Amelie Dayman
Summary: A quiet day unfolds in Amelie’s simple apartment, offering a glimpse into the contrast between her relentless schedule and fleeting moments of peace with Lando. As they navigate the calm together, their time is filled with humor, mundane activities, and an undeniable connection, highlighting how love thrives in the ordinary.
Wordcount: 1.1 k
Warnings: just fluff
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June 12th, 2024 - Indianapolis, IN
The soft hum of the air conditioning was the only sound in Amelie’s apartment as sunlight streamed through the wide windows. It was simple, almost painfully so, with sleek modern furniture that looked more functional than inviting. The neutral tones of the space felt impersonal, a far cry from the warmth of her home in New York. She didn’t bother decorating it—what was the point when it wasn’t home? But at least her cats made it feel a little less empty.
Lando groaned as he rolled over on the bed, squinting against the morning light. It was too damn early, but his internal clock was still set to European time. He glanced at the other side of the bed, already empty. Of course. Amelie had been up for hours.
Dragging himself out of bed, he shuffled to the kitchen, scratching the back of his neck. The cats were already awake and clearly unimpressed by his delayed attention. Björn, the wild little troublemaker, was batting at an empty food bowl, while Benny lounged on the couch, looking smug as ever.
—Alright, alright, I get it,— Lando muttered, grabbing the bag of cat food from the counter. Björn meowed insistently, circling his legs like a predator. —You’re worse than Max when he’s hungry.—
He filled their bowls, watching as Björn practically attacked his food while Benny sauntered over with the kind of regal air that suggested he was doing Lando a favor by eating at all.
—Good morning to you too, Your Highness,— Lando said, giving Benny a scratch behind the ears before grabbing a cup of coffee.
The apartment was too quiet without Amelie, and he already missed her presence despite having spent every waking moment with her since the Governor’s Ball. He smiled at the thought—how her eyes had lit up when she’d seen him in New York, how they’d danced and laughed like the rest of the world didn’t exist.
But Indianapolis was... different. It wasn’t glamorous or bustling like New York. It was quiet, almost eerily so. And Amelie’s schedule here was relentless. He was determined to make the most of the week he had with her, even if it meant figuring out how to navigate her insane filming hours.
As if on cue, the front door creaked open, and Amelie walked in, balancing a tote bag and a cup of coffee. She looked exhausted, her hair pulled into a messy bun and her face free of makeup, but she still managed to take his breath away.
—You’re awake,— she said, kicking off her sneakers.
—Barely,— Lando replied, setting his mug down and walking over to her. He wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her close. —I don’t know how you do it. It’s not even noon, and you’ve already been out and back.—
—Welcome to my life,— she said with a tired laugh, resting her forehead against his chest. —It’s only going to get worse. I have a night shoot later.—
Lando groaned dramatically. —A night shoot? What am I supposed to do all day without you?—
—Entertain my cats. They’re more demanding than I am,— she teased, pulling back to look at him.
—Björn’s a little shit,— Lando said, glancing at the wild tabby who was now scaling the back of the couch like a jungle cat. —He tried to kill me this morning.—
—That’s just his way of saying he likes you,— Amelie said, grinning. —And Benny?—
—Benny’s chill. He’s my favorite.—
—Traitor,— Amelie said, smacking his arm lightly.
They spent the rest of the morning lounging around the apartment. Amelie caught up on some lines for a scene she was filming later, while Lando sprawled on the couch, scrolling through memes and occasionally tossing toys for the cats.
By mid-afternoon, boredom got the best of him.
—Let’s do something,— he said, stretching his arms above his head.
—I have to be back on set in three hours,— Amelie reminded him, not looking up from her script.
—Three hours is plenty of time! Let’s explore or... I don’t know, eat something that isn’t cereal.—
Amelie rolled her eyes but smiled. —Fine. Let’s go.—
They ended up at a small café down the street, the kind of place that felt like it belonged in a Hallmark movie. The waitress recognized Amelie instantly, but she didn’t make a big deal about it, much to Lando’s relief.
As they sat outside, sipping iced coffee and picking at a shared slice of pie, Lando leaned back in his chair and took in the quiet street.
—This place is... quaint,— he said, trying to find a polite word.
—It’s boring as hell,— Amelie said bluntly. —Don’t sugarcoat it.—
Lando laughed. —Alright, yeah. It’s boring as hell. But you make it bearable.—
She rolled her eyes but couldn’t hide her smile. —You’re such a dork.—
They walked back to the apartment hand in hand, and for a moment, it felt like the calm before the storm. Amelie had a long night ahead, and Lando knew their time together was fleeting, but he was determined to make the most of it.
That evening, as Amelie got ready to head back to set, Lando found himself alone with the cats again. Benny curled up next to him on the couch while Björn darted around the apartment like a lunatic. He sent Amelie a text.
Lan🧡: Good luck tonight. Don’t let Vecna scare you too much.
Ames💛: Vecna’s got nothing on Björn. That cat’s a menace.
Lando chuckled, glancing at the tabby who was now clawing at a random corner of the rug.
This wasn’t the glamorous life he’d imagined when he’d flown from Canada to surprise her in New York. But sitting there, in her plain, simple apartment, surrounded by her chaos and her cats, he realized something.
He didn’t care where they were or what they were doing. As long as he was with her, he was happy.
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midnight1nk · 15 hours ago
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So, this week's episode...
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[spoilers below cut]
WOW, a Mario Reacts! It's been a long time, hasn't it? Hell yeah, I can work with this!
(no bc seriously, I just finished watching ep. 7 of Arcane before this and I need an emotional break, yeah I know the rest of Act 3 is gonna kill me)
(the following is my live reaction:)
oh hey, Mario! Wassup?
jigsaw, is that you?
oh nvm, hello Swag! nice to see you again since last episode
I'm about to commit a crime [*strikes a pose then walks away*]
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I'm willing to work in a government office just so I can come up with an acronym like, gee idk, Y.U.R.I. or something (I should've been a worker in NASA)
NO STOP STOP WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! WHAT. ARE. YOU. DOING?!
At this point, Mario, I would just give up
[*clears throat*] mejor me muero, ni modo que sigo con estos porquerías. bueno como dice Mario, bye bye [*drinks some water*] alright I'm back
TADC? ah, just a normal Saturday
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no thoughts, head empty
honestly, mood
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well, in his own way, yeah
[*echoes announcer voice*] VR, the new era of entertainment
...mr puzzles? nah jk jk
oh, Four's theory may not be wrong here (omg it's jesus)
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still can't believe christianity is canon in the SMG4 universe
oh, so I was right! [*jigsaw voice*] "I wanna play a game."
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That's actually kinda sweet that he immediately chooses his brother
OH SHIT OOOOH that's gotta hurt
NO MARIO, THAT SHOULD'VE BEEN ME
[*other me pops in*] emo girlfriend, omg it's smg3
no, we're NOT gonna look too much into this, shut up other me
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PPFFFTTT that caught me so off guard
say it with me now: YOU CAN'T CONTROL MARIO [*applause*]
I mean, we've been through simulations before, we can take this one too
unironically, I wouldn't mind a 10-hour video of just Mario (and/or the rest of the Crew) just dancing :)
it doesn't even need to have music, I can just put my playlist on and I would totally join in
ooooh, you want to scan that QR code so badly
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but also, how did they get a screenshot of my computer?
Mario 🤝 Mario Buddy from the last episode → destroying PCs for the LOLs
AKLDHLKSAFB;KL just the way Mario goes for a fighting stance just so he could run away will never not be funny to me
LET ME IN LET ME INNNNNNNNN
10 hours, welp I got my wish lmao
Mario morphing his face... hmmmm..... [*flashback noises*]
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[SMG4: MAR10 Day]
....
don't think about it don't think about it don't think about it
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KIRBO NOOOOOOOOO
NO NO NO SWAG NO
same vibes
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meme factory? youtube arc? is that you? /j
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(yeah I know that the Team uses the same assets ik)
LET'S DO THISSSS oh welp time to vibe
FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT
what would that be, Swag? Try not to Laugh challenge? I might win tbh
LET'S GO GAMBLING
laughing because of early victory call? very in character for Swag
oooh that's some good animation (y'know, as always)
HOLD UP WAIT A MINUTE
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am i thinking too much into this or is this the same military base from last episode?
Alright, my little headcanon: the events of this episode and the last one took place on the exact same day
that's just for me specifically
oh hey, more TADC ref
Also, nice PINGAS STUCK IN A DOOR ref
man Mario can't catch a break dude
Congrats to CMorseu for your art being featured at the end credits 🎉
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.・-: ✧ :--: ✧ :-・.
Such a good episode! Not plot-heavy, just a silly episode. I'll gladly take it as my late birthday present. And it's great to have Swag back, kinda was half-expecting Chris to just pop out.
I've said this once and I'll say it again: I wouldn't mind if the rest of the year is just filled with goofy episodes. After all, we just came from WOTFI and we do need a bit of a break so the Team could work on the next arc. (From the looks of things, we might get goop!4 *cough cough*)
Loved the bits of animation and Mario's expressions as always.
Now, I know there is some talk about the SMG4 Crew/Mario Does Things being on hiatus and merging with the Saturday videos. If you can even call it that. Personally, I don't mind it. I completely understand if doing 2 episodes per week is a lot for the Team to handle, though I do wish they would give an explanation for it. I think the best solution would be for the Team making an announcement of the change, the reasons behind it, and how it may be different from the regular Saturday episodes. Also make it clear that "hey, the title says this so it doesn't impact the main storyline".
Anyway, it has been overall a pretty funny episode and I quite enjoyed it! Now, if you excuse me, I'm gonna cry my eyes out watching the rest of Arcane Act 3 and bring that angst to the next episode concept :)
OH THE MISERY EVERYBODY WANTS TO BE MY ENEMYYYYYYY
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tarot-by-e11e · 2 hours ago
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PAC: "Little Warnings"
(this is strictly for entertainment purposes only)
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Unfortunately, this is gonna hurt. So, don't read through this if you're already going through some pretty harsh stuff.
When I felt called to do this PAC, I felt that we needed to be humbled and check ourselves occasionally to see if we were being a bit too arrogant. It's such an odd feeling to be called to do this theme for this specific PAC, but hey, even if not every loving call out may be meant for others, every message is still, in some shape or form, valid. Not all of it may resonate with you, and that is still okay~
But I am manifesting that you will encounter this when the universe deems you need to be lovingly knocked down a few pegs~
Nothing wrong with a little loving call-out?
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Pile 1:
Cards Pulled:
Queen of Wands, Hierophant, 5 of Coins
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Hi Pile 1, if you chose this pile, whenever part of your journey you read this, here are your little warnings you might need to know, so only take what resonates with you, okay?
"Aren't you getting a bit over your head lately? Nothing wrong about being confident in your own abilities but you don't need to rub it in other people's faces that you know you're that Queen B~"
"There's a fine line between confidence and arrogance, my dear. If you don't want to be perceived as someone abrasive or cheap, you know what you need to do."
"Traditions are great and all but there's always room to make new traditions. Honoring the past doesn't mean you have to continue living in the past."
"Which would you prefer being ruthlessly right all the time and be hated? Or learn how to communicate compassionately without sacrificing your truth?"
"Don't expect different results when you're clearly stuck in your ways."
"No matter how much you mean well, if you don't know how to respectfully convey your messages properly, you will not be understood in a way that you'd prefer."
"Don't expect other people to pick up on your body language and subtle hints. Not everyone is as painfully self aware as you."
"Your Past pain is valid but your attitude is not."
"You keep behaving like you can't get passed your trauma from your past then btch out on how cruel life was for you, so you project your hurt towards others, especially towards people who are living the life that you want. Seriously, pick a struggle and push through it. Make it make sense."
"You are not bound to the environment you grew up in, because you have the power to change your destiny. Remember, at the end of the day, only you can save yourself from your circumstance."
"You are more capable than you let yourself believe you are. You just chose to live in your pain when you know you have to put in the effort for you to change your life for the better."
"You are bound by your own self imposed limitations. You are imprisoned in your mind by your own fear."
Channeled Song:
(this concludes the end of your reading)
(this is strictly for entertainment purposes only)
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Pile 2:
Cards Pulled:
Queen of Swords, Chariot, Strength
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Hi Pile 2, if you chose this pile, whenever part of your journey you read this, here are your little warnings you might need to know, so only take what resonates with you, okay?
- "I'm all up for honesty, just not verbal abuse. So be discerning if the receiver of the message is too soft hearted or easily traumatised."
- "Words are double edged swords. The same words that can heal can also break someone's heart."
- "Discern which battles are worth fighting for. Know when to retreat your words when you know that how you speak may bring more harm than good."
- "Being assertive and a goal getter is nice and all, but remember, your passion may be misinterpreted as abrasive and uncouth. Remember to respect other's personal boundaries."
- "Going after what you want is normal, disregarding someone's feelings and free will isn't."
- "Think before you speak or do."
- "Your way isn't the only way."
- "Impulsive behaviour leaves you susceptible to disaster and unnecessary quarrel. It won't kill you to think before you leap."
- "You don't need to so harsh and dominant to be perceived as strong."
- "Having strength does not warrant you to be mannerless and disrespectful."
- "Hypervigilance doesn't mean you're strong. It means you've been pushed to the corner where you had no one to rely on, especially during the times you need anyone the most."
- "Being able to do everything on your own doesn't mean you don't need help. You can lean on to others unharmed too. Not everyone is out to get you."
- "Just because you used to being in pain and on your own, it doesn't mean that what you've gone through is something you deserve. Don't catastrophize every bad thing that's happened to you as a punishment from the universe. Unfortunately, bad things happen for no reason. You were just unfortunately at the wrong place in the wrong time."
- "You don't deserve to be stuck in your hyperindepence and wear your lack of trust in others like a badge of honor. Your body can only hold so much trauma before it starts completely wrecking your nervous system and have it physically manifest as an illness. Ex. You struggle to lose weight no matter how much you work out because your body doesn't feel safe to exist. That's why you body stores fat as a cushion to help make it feel safe to exist."
- "How far will you keep pushing the people you love away? Are you waiting for their patience to run out so that you can subconsciously prove to yourself that everyone would leave you?? You're so hellbent in your skewed narrative that feeds your self-sabotaging tendencies and lack of self worth that you'd do anything to have your negative self talk to manifest into your reality. Stop feeding yourself the BS that (If they're meant for me, they'll stay. News Flash, no one wants to willing stay with someone who refuse to grow out of their own toxicity. No one can save you but yourself. EVEN YOUR LOVED ONES HAS LIMITS TOO."
- "Be a dear and search up the meaning of the ff. words: GASLIGHTING, STONE WALLING, COVERT NARCISSIST, ACCOUNTABILITY, EMOTIONAL MATURITY, JEALOUSY, SOFT FBOI/GURL, SHADOW WORK, MALADAPTIVE DAYDREAMING (Feel free to see which words hurts the most for you and start working on that)"
- "No one can save you from your own self imposed mental prison of scarcity and unworthiness. People around you can only do so much for you. The power to trap you and free you has always been in your hands."
- "Are you done thinking that everyone is out to get you? Hopefully you'd come to realise that people don't think about you as much as you think they do. Everyone's busy barely surviving their lives to be bothered to meddle with yours."
- "You're not as strong as much as a target you think you are, and that's okay. You don't have to be in everyone's mind and in everyone's DM to feel important. You are worthy and deserving of all regardless if you are in the spotlight or behind the scenes."
- "Two things can be true at the same time. You are the Main Character of your life and also be a background character is someone else's storyline."
- "What's serious for you may not be serious for someone else. So don't expect others to adjust for you when you made zero efforts to properly communicate what you wanted to say."
Channeled Song:
(this concludes the end of your reading)
(this is strictly for entertainment purposes only)
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Pile 3:
Cards Pulled:
7 of Swords, Ace of Swords, 6 of Wands
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Hi Pile 3, if you chose this pile, whenever part of your journey you read this, here are your little warnings you might need to know, so only take what resonates with you, okay?
- "Just because someone broke your heart it doesn't give you the right to leave a trail of broken hearts in your path. Your pain is valid but your attitude and actions afterwards aren't."
- "Being betrayed in the past doesn't mean you should play and to toy with someone else's feelings. You are becoming the player that you hated the game for."
- "Not all people mean to use and abuse you. Other people are just good natured and mean what they say. Don't confuse someone's genuity because someone else broke your trust before."
- "Discernment is highly encouraged, projecting your pain and jealousy isn't."
- "It's great to chase new ideas, what's not great is to chase the idea of someone new then cheat on your current partner just because things got bored. Don't be a part of the problem."
- "Don't even dare entertain anyone new just because you chose to be lazy and not put in the effort to communicate on how your current relationship can get better. Emotionally opening up to someone is cheating. Having a work husband/wife is still cheating. Putting yourself in any situation that would cause your partner to doubt your loyalty is a breeding ground of disaster of the life you currently know."
- "If you caved in and cheat now, you are bound to cheat again. If you allow yourself to be tempted now, you have proven yourself unworthy to even be in a loving relationship. In short: you have become part of the problem. So don't expect receiving anything you refused to give. You have no right to the privileges of an exclusive and healthy relationship if you fck around and find out. (because you actively chose to play whack a mole and find out what it's like to have std because of your recklessness)."
Channeled Song:
- "How far will you go just to win? Will you cheat on your partner just to have a promotion? Will you pay someone to ruin your competition just to win? Will you start a smear campaign just to go ahead? Will you drop little white lies to make yourself appear as the better option? How illegal and immoral would you allow yourself to become just to get ahead? Is it worth it? Lose your friends and family along the way? Just to win that empty cup?"
- "Will you abandon your morals just to win?"
(this concludes the end of your reading)
(this is strictly for entertainment purposes only)
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Pile 4:
Cards Pulled:
6 of Swords, Knight of Cups, 7 of Wands
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Hi Pile 4, if you chose this pile, whenever part of your journey you read this, here are your little warnings you might need to know, so only take what resonates with you, okay?
- "Unfortunately, leaving the problem behind without any explanation or letter won't make it go away."
- "Ghosting, just to protect your ego, is never the answer. Face your issues like an adult and accept the consequences of your actions accordingly."
- "No amount of dr*gs, alcohol, smoke or flings can help you tun away from your own willful ignorance. You can't run away from your own feelings. The only way to get away/rid of your problem is by facing it. This is one of the moments in a person's life where DELULU is NOT the SOLULU."
- "Fleeing the country won't keep you from feeling your feelings."
- "Just because you understand how people work and emotionally operate, it doesn't mean that you should use that to your unfair advantage. Stop binge watching those dark psychology videos. And you wonder why people pick a bad vibe from you? What do you expect? You are indeed the problem: the not so covert manipulative problem."
- "Stop using the promise of helping others with their dreams just so you can trick them in making your dreams come true at their expense."
- "You can only spin a web of lies so far."
- "You're not as convincing of a gaslighter as you think you are. People can see through your lies, they just chose not to speak up because, yes, they do it out of pity."
- "Resilience is incredibly admired but bulldozing other people out of your way to get the results is out of the question."
- "Not seeing the results that you want then btching about not having slept enough and feeling like you're about to collapse? You chose to overwork and overburden yourself to the point of burn out, and you're shocked that your health and sanity is fcked up? Dear, make it make sense."
- "Has it ever occurred to you that just because you put in the effort to win someone over, it doesn't mean that they're obligated to choose you? Free will and preferences are a thing, you know? You can be everything and more to that person, and that person is not required nor obligated to choose you. You can the most ideal man/woman and still not be chosen."
- "Don't expect exclusivity from someone who told you from the beginning that they're there to fck around. You can't change someone just because you stayed. You can only keep someone that wants to be kept by you."
Channeled Song:
(this concludes the end of your reading)
(this is strictly for entertainment purposes only)
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Feel free to check out my feedback herePaid Readings are AVAILABLE
In all honesty, I feel so bad for releasing this PAC but there's this oddly strong gut feeling that we all need to be humbled and wake up to the toxicity we all chose to lie with at night.
In fact, some things we've gone through, unfortunately are the results of our own lack of accountability.
Sorry if I hurt your feelings, but some painful warnings need to be said.
Notice:
Exchange Readings are OPEN
Feel free to send me some support in the form of tips,
Head to my Buy-Me-A-Coffee here 🍀
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a-sky-full-of-ideas · 1 year ago
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Buggy having body issues that usually lead to spiralling into an existential crisis.
Cause where does “Buggy” begin? Where does he end? In how many pieces can you cut him until he cannot be considered himself anymore? How tiny do the pieces have to be? Does the part of him matter ? What would count more: his eyes or his ears ? If only his hand remains … would he still be “alive”? Does Shanks have these thoughts, now having lost an arm? Would he understand? Would he still talk to him ? Like that?
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suddencolds · 4 months ago
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.~
#not a vent just a journal entry (feel free to scroll past; there is no snz here and this is also not that interesting)#realizing now that i never thought of myself as#someone whose absence would register to others in any other way than just neutral/detached recognition?#phrasing this really badly and i am truly going to delete this later bc it is embarrassing LOL#i think when i was young and posting all this fic into questionable places (the f*rum) i was like#(@ an unfinished work of mine) no way anyone could be bothered by these cliffhangers 👍 they can just imagine the ending#even though i would frequently be bothered by other people's cliffhangers. that exact same principle just wouldn't apply to me in my head#and when i did not respond to people i was like.. i'm sure i wasn't really an important part of their lives so they won't mind it#if i stepped away?#i never really entertained the concept of people missing me or looking forward to my responses 😭 i never thought of myself as someone worth#missing... so when i disappeared it was always with little to no sense of guilt. i think even now i struggle with#seeing myself as someone that inhabits like a tangible enough space in other people's lives that my absence would be felt#(and i don't mean that in a morbid way. and i do recognize that it's quite hypocritical)#on the flipside of things i frequently miss people and look forward to their responses. and sometimes i wonder like#do they all know? do they all know that i miss them because they somehow understand this aspect of human nature better than i do?#or are they in the dark like i am? are these things assumed or are they only known when they are said... 😭#i am a little bit of a coward so i am not saying anything (also because can you even say this kind of thing to someone??#i would probably die of embarrassment) but#how strange it is to have someone suddenly inhabit a space in your life that is substantial enough that#when they're gone you feel that space open up and you miss them#the few times in my life people have conveyed that sentiment to me i remember feeling puzzled that my presence could have that kind of#weight to them. i think my problem is that i purposefully do not read between the lines if the conclusion is something favorable towards me#because i don't want to bank on something good that might or might not be true 😭 anyways this is way too long already. if you read this#then good morning or goodnight
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nnnn99999 · 1 month ago
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I managed to spend so many years of my life being a normal rational person even while fangirling. I never expected to enter my delulu era at 25. But look at me now. I am seated on the front row of the jd circus decked out in full clown outfit as I enjoy whatever delusions they are feeding me, fully aware that all of it are, in fact delusions. And I am having a great time at that. There is something really fun about having an entire fandom, including the artists themselves, going let's be delulu together. I am surprised jd managed to get to a stubborn, rational and cynical person like me. Somehow, they managed to touch that hopeless romantic hidden really really deep within me.
I blame joong. I mean dunk is responsible for it too, but it's mostly joong.
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wantonlywindswept · 2 months ago
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any time i start with a new therapist there is a period where i am basically the embodiment of that gina meme from brooklyn 99
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thekingofspin · 2 months ago
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whatever dick decided to put adverts on prime video needs their balls chopped because why the fuck am I getting more ads watching shows legally than I ever have pirating.
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mcybree · 4 months ago
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Im doing a lot of thinking abt why roleplaying feels different/less natural for me in beastlife s4 in comparison to s3, and i think it’s because there’s ways i know i should be feeling (based on the perception of my character— when i was fresh out of s2 nobody knew enough about my guy to have opinions) vs how i am feeling. I’m catching myself thinking, “it wouldn’t make sense for my character to [blank],” and it’s like… what do i mean by that. what do i mean that this feeling im having in-session “wouldnt make sense for my character” to feel? It might be surprising to other beasts who know me for one thing and expect consistency, i guess?? but in s3 i just acted on feelings and then shit happened. what. why am i trying to enforce a character that does not exist when the strength of mcrp lies in its improvisational nature. I didn’t write this guy on purpose, why am i trying to write him now
#i suppose its both the perception + higher investment from myself#I care about this story greatly now#and want it to be “good”. But there’s only so much control i have over that#Its not my job to break down the themes of the narrative and try my best to make it cohesive im here to play games and dramatics#My favorite mcrp narratives werent written on purpose. they literally just happened naturally#Imagine if i went into elysium after death thinking “how do i properly conclude my character arc”#And not “This will probably land us a conclusion. lets ball”#I think there’s also more pressure because my character is universally seen as a bad guy now so im like. ohh#What if i make him too sympathetic on accident and everyone thinks im weird irl about it#Bitch youre roleplaying with cubes. who give a fuck……#sorry for posting like you people know what im talking about btw#But i also just think mcrp is rlly interesting#beastlife#<- i guess. I use it as an organizational tag but its funny that there’s a “maintag” now#Still using it for organization though idgaf#Unrelated but I got a good scott ask earlier today in my drafts that i just remembered#The forgetter#Ftr i think its good to be somewhat narratively aware but the way i typically do it is in an entertainer sense#and not a serious serious mode writing sense. i am much more comfortable with one of these over the other#which would be why playing s4 feels a bit unnatural for me at times#not to say people who do go into mcrp with this mindset are like. wrong. it just does not work for me i think
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nyxofdemons · 10 months ago
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four years for this show...
#IM SORRY. ITS JUST. IM SO. HHHHHRGN#its fine. its good. its entertaining to say the least#but from a writing perspective......#im not an anti i am the worlds biggest helluva boss enjoyer the hellaverse is SO SPECIAL TO ME#but.. the more i see about hazbin s1......#how in over four years was this what you came up with. how is the pacing this insane. how is this character treatment ok.... PLEASE#my sorta toxic trait is that as someone obsessed with media analysis; narrative devices; and story structure -#as well as just. someone who is an aspiring showrunner/creator working on my own huge projects -#is that every time i come across a movie or show that i think is done in a really lacking way. all i can think about is how i would#have done it instead#(this happens in a non-critical way too tbf if i really enjoy a book or game i'll be like they should let me make a based on film)#but hazbin. hazbin. all i have right now is 'i could fix her' in my head#I WOULD TREAT THESE CHARACTERS RIGHT I WOULD GIVE THEM THE NARRATIVE THEY DESERVE#there is. so much potential here. how is the execution so lacking#mine#good ideas!!!! good moments!!!!!!!! THE OVERALL CONSISTENT NARRATIVE IS NOT DOING SO HOT#as a side note though i really think this is why helluva is doing so much better in terms of pacing and writing. the structure of that show#is so much more accommodating to a long intricate story WHILE weaving in a billion different character stories#8 episodes for hazbin is insane season 1 needed twice as much#nyx crit tag
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qangelbluebird · 10 months ago
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Going from dead/non-updating media to technically-updating-but-games-take-years-to-make media to qsmp is wild. From nothing to “the link is still missing where is missing link<-(it’s been a year)” to “do you remember,,,, QSMP,,,, it’s been decades<-(it has been five days. It is coming back in another five days. You people are fascinating(pos))”
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sealeneee · 3 months ago
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siiiiiiigh
#i am in fact a grown adult who is still incapable of talking about their feelings and thoughts to people so I'll just rant here#my relationship with my mother is. so weird. it's not always bad but it always ends up bad for one reason or another#she can be perfectly civil and i'll still be irritated. other times i do try to tolerate it and engage and she ends up saying something#upsetting to me either way.#i don't want to keep being rude to her i don't want to get mad and annoyed all the time but i just can't stop. it's always like this#and i hate myself for it and i hate her and i hate everything about it#today i was leaving for work and she was like. i'll take the trash out of your room and i told her not to do it. she kept insisting and i#had to raise my voice at her to maybe get the point across to get her not to touch anything#and yes my room is a fucking mess and it is something to be embarrassed of. i just feel so fucking tired all time time and i keep tellin#myself that i will clean it this time for sure and then i don't. most of the time it's my mother taking care of it without my permission#and i am grateful for it bc nobody likes living in a mess... but i also fucking hate it because it makes me feel even more worthless#i just can't get rid of the feeling of shame. no matter what i do.#and back to the mother thing. i told her that if she touches anything i will go to her room and throw out anything that isn't nailed down#even though objectively i have no reason to oppose her helping me#but i also fucking hate it#maybe being rude is the only way to get it across. but also i get irritated about anything so easily#i feel shittier and shittier every day. had there been an easy and painless way of killing myself i would have done it already#and despite how much i want to blame this on a disorder or lack of access to medication. there is no magic pill that would fix me is there#i'm just a shitty person who cannot get it together despite everything being handed to me#i'm literally bad at anything and everything. i'm not even a good blogger lmao#people have it much worse in life and still do better. me? i'm useless. there's no helping it. i should have died from covid or something#nobody will save me. nobody cares enough. besides one person whom i push away because i can't stand her and i don't even know why 👍#if i stop messaging people first most of them would forget about me#i am alone. a lonely person in a messy room desperately trying to be entertaining so someone will pay a little bit of attention to me.#not to mention the geopolitics#i won't even go there. i hate the possibility that people might see it mentioned and give me shit for it#one more thing that is apparently my fault. directly or indirectly#all i want is to leave this country. spend the day with someone who cares for me like an actual friend. and then shoot myself so i don't#have to go back#sealene.txt
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doodlingwren · 3 months ago
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Hiatus
I am going on hiatus for a bit more. I really really hoped the stuff that have been going on lately were already "sorted out" but, uhm... they aren't. I need to take a bit more time offline once again, and try to work things out.
Thank you for your patience ❤
Wren
#EDIT: I've deactivated my IG for a bit because it wasn't helping at all. I'll be back there but I need time#wren text tag#somehow issues from mid July/early August have managed to get worse. Like I'm not even surprised bc I'm used to it but GIRL . What the fuck#“it's finally summer”+“can't wait to draw!” * gets 3 hiatus in a row * maybe drawing or summer isn't really meant to be 🤨🤔#I hate having to log-in to post a hiatus message and then dissapear again when I'm supposed to post my doodles n have fun#Feels like one of those jesters that appears at luncheon to entertain the royal court and then they go missing for the rest of the month#bc I'm trying very hard not to hide in my shell + having a bit more presence here to post my artwork#and somehow I fail at both like fucking heck. How can you be so bad at this.#but in short I won't be here to answer stuff and being silly or whatever people expect me to do#because if you're here for the silly stuff. MAN. I'm am sorry but I don't feel silly at all.#Somebody once said “the horrors are never ending yet I remain silly” but I forgot the “remain silly” part#And if you're here for drawings. I don't even have time and I don't feel like drawing at all. Idk which one is worse#The bakery hangs up the “closed today” so people know they have to go to buy bread somewhere else. Same here. But it won't last a day#idk why the bread analogy. Guess I'm a birb after all#this is also the closest thing to a vent post I will ever write and I managed to say nothing at all. Vagueposting about vent. Good job Wren#tw: vent#tagging in case somebody like me needs to have some tags filtered#the hiatus will go on also a bit longer because the last few weeks my mental health suffered a lot and I know my limit#also this post was queued. If I see I can still be active before publishing I will delete it otherwise see for yourself#also queue doesn't work ig like I programmed this for 9 pm hopefully it will be up by then and not any other random time
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statisticalcats2 · 3 months ago
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"zoos are nothing more than revenue-generating organizations designed to keep the turnstiles rotating"
Yeah, you can really tell this by how one of the most common complaints from zoo guests is basically "the zoo cares about the animals too much"
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polyamorouspunk · 3 months ago
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Hug
*Hug*
#it’s really easy to dismiss why I’m upset and tell myself it’s silly and stupid but#so I went to a party with ⚡️ and 🔮 (hosted at ⚡️’s house) everyone was drinking I was the only sober one#but hearing ⚡️ and 🔮 talk about all these dates they go on trying to hook up with all these people missing people they have crushes on etc.#like what to me is huge and soul crushing and life changing to them is just. a fling or something.#I spent MONTHS in a state of suicidal ideation self harming wondering if I should commit myself over how things went with 🔮#to hear her talk about during those months she was out going on other dates trying to hook up with other people etc.#what was just another date in a long line of dates and people to her was something equal to a breakup to me#and that hurts? and it’s okay that that hurts? it’s okay that I’m upset by that?#because dating is NOT that casual for me#those two dates I went on with her were the first dates I had been on since 2021#and now I can’t even think about being with anyone else besides those two#I’m realizing just how much it hurts me that I’m someone in a long line of random dates/cheap thrills/short lived relationships#because to me they are… well shit man look how much I talk about them on here.#I don’t know if they are FPs but they’re like. Serious interests at least.#they’re who I’m comparing everyone I talk to to#I know that I’m not going to be able to really entertain the idea of flirting seriously with anyone else because I am hooked on them#and one doesn’t know and the other doesn’t care#and I don’t know what to do about it#I told 🔮 if I had a way to move on I would. does she think this is fun for me? that I’m having a good time?#that I love feeling like I want to kill myself over her? because this isn’t fucking fun for me!#THIS FUCKING SUCKS!#*sigh*#idk what else to say#punk gets mail
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xcziel · 4 months ago
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it's a great day to be in the most insane headspace
where i'm sick and thus loopy and whiplashing violently between: shocks of anger and despair and then vibrating with delight
my blood pressure is so far up i'm gonna take an aspirin this is ridiculous
the fucking slow tigers are gaining on me i swear
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