#so many languages all at the same time is so interesting to me. hearing about things happening second hand from people live as they are

[qangelbluebird]

Going from dead/non-updating media to technically-updating-but-games-take-years-to-make media to qsmp is wild. From nothing to “the link is still missing where is missing link<-(it’s been a year)” to “do you remember,,,, QSMP,,,, it’s been decades<-(it has been five days. It is coming back in another five days. You people are fascinating(pos))”

[honeyvenommusic]

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[mrchoppedslefthand]

[SPOILERS] Homicipher Is Actually Romantic, Convince Me Otherwise [Analysis/Opinion] [SFW]

Word count: 3,332

Edit: 11/7/2024

[Feel free to skip to the last objective "Individual route discussion + what made it romantic" if you want to get straight to the point]

Homicipher is truthfully a romantic (or platonic) game. It is a game that has to be looked at from a different perspective when it comes to love/romance. A game where you have to take in consideration of the characters and the nature of their 'other world'. Today's post will discuss into what I believe made Homicipher an oddly, but romantic game, despite its shortcoming and abrupt ends.

⚠️[MAJOR LORE/CHARACTER ROUTE SPOILERS] ⚠️

Discussion Objectives:

Definition of Love & how it plays into Homicipher

The nature of the 'other world' and ghosts

Individual route discussion + what made it romantic (thoughts)

What Is Love & How Does It Play Into Homicipher?

Love has many layers of definition and associations. Maybe, that is why some may deem Homicipher to be "unromantic" and some disagree on that thought. It also varies based on the type of content/exposure you had consume in the category of love [whether romantic or platonic]. Socially, from a common standpoint, love is a strong attachment or affection for someone. Often from a social standpoint associated with dates, affection, and intimacy. However, love is always changing, since it is a social script on what its suppose to be, and changes as society progresses. Some notions stay the same but some begin to change (just like how language and certain concepts begin to change in the other world, a different society from our own). For the sake of a "true" definition of love. I will be using the definition offered by the Oxford Language Dictionary. So, what is love?

Love as a noun is...

"An intense feeling of deep affection"

"A great interest and pleasure in something"

"A person or thing that one loves"

Love as a verb is...

"Feel deep affection for (someone)"

"Like or enjoy very much"

Not long after its release there had been a fair number of comments/reviews criticizing Homicipher for its lack of romance. This claim is NOT entirely wrong. From the expectations of a "normal" Otome/dating sim it doesn't necessarily meet the requirements because of its lack of intimacy, affection and interest from a HUMAN/SOCIETAL perspective. We must remember that romance/love does not necessarily equate to kissing, hand holding, and intimacy especially considering that these are the HUMAN (societal) views on what romance/love is. A concept that had become lost in the 'other world'. So how can we call Homicipher romantic if we have to cross out the influence of our society? The answer is that we can't fully avoid it, HOWEVER, we must be open to a different perspective of what 'their' version of love is (platonic love/or romantic). No matter how lacking, dense, twisted and grotesque the moments we have spent with these ghosts are. In some shape and form it CAN equate itself to love (platonic/ or romantic). I think a lot of people forget that time itself can be equate to some complicated level of love. The fact you spend time with someone, and it develops to something further for worse or better, something that even love may not be able to name, is what this game demonstrates.

Homicipher has a consistent theme, the loss of truth, the acceptance of ignorance and the concept of eternity. Which shockingly is where the romance comes from. When we allow ourselves to rot in that world. When we ignore the exit and choose to stay, is where the romance comes through. Love is complicated. What can I say?

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The Nature of the 'Other World' & Ghosts

Alot of the ghosts we encounter can be friendly, but also just as deadly. We hear it from almost all of the casts warning or discussing about how dangerous a lot of the ghosts (including themselves) roam in this world, and in different endings, succumb to this danger ourselves. The longer we stay in this world, we soon start to become no different. As we, a human, begin to slowly transform into a different entity. We begin to react more violently (though it can be argued that since our MC is a serial killer, she might have just been violent and cruel in general). When angered, or things start not to go her way, she gets filled with bloodlust and takes it out on who she's with. Killing is a common thing to do in this world, especially when experiencing anger, sadness and even boredom. The concept of death is a little complicated as they can easily regenerate themselves back to "life". As the game progresses, we learn that some of these ghosts cannot grasp certain concepts (such as love), remember their own name and self, and don't have exact words (sometimes none) for items.

When sometimes even confessing that you like some of the ghosts they question you, and state that they cannot understand you or that feeling (platonic/ or romantic). We are in a setting that is beyond the mortal realm, there aren't any exactly "ideal" dates in a place different from the moral realm... so you're going to be stuck in a scary place, having a scary "date".

However just because they cannot understand the concept of love, doesn't meant that they can't feel it. It is something that the body may still feel, and the mind not being able to put an identity to that feeling or even situation, since meanings and concepts get lost within this realm. The fact that we are allowed to spend an eternity in this realm, with our handsome casts of ghosts. Is oddly and sadly romantic. For Mr. Crawling it is his devotion and loyalty to you, it is how he worries and cares for you, it is his affection and attempts to soothe you. For Mr. Silvair it is his care for you (as research of course lol), your usefulness (which is why he is attracted to you), but even then, one of his endings he keeps you as a head, when you had become useless to him. For Mr. Gap he finds you intriguing, he wants to play and follow you around, always asking for parts of you with consent, loves to brag about himself to you. For Mr. Chopped it is his want to rely on you, to feel safe with you, to protect him, to spend time with him. For Mr. Hood it his willingness to help you for an eternity, to roam with you forever, keeping you away from danger. For Mr. Machete it is the fact you both spend an eternity searching for a home together, to suffer boredom together, to suffer within each other's presence. For Mr. Scarletella it is his obsession for you and his willingness to spend an eternity with you.

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Individual Routes + What Made Them Romantic

[Not in any particular order]

Mr. Crawling

If I had to rank who had the most "romantic" route overall, it would be Mr. Crawling. With the definition usage of love from the Oxford dictionary, verb and noun he checks all the list. Not only that, but we spend time with him the most out of all the other casts. He was the very first ghost we meet (briefly in the beginning) and got stuck with. We are like a baby bird imprinting on him because we saw him first and spent time with him the most, so of course we might feel the most attached to him compared to the others. As the game progresses Mr. Crawling doesn't fail to let us know that he cares for us and our safety warning us of the dangers that come and explaining how to navigate our way around danger. He expresses his worries when we disappeared. He seems to have some concept of love (platonic/ or romantic) as he admittedly tells us that he likes us and ask us if we like him. He expresses how he wants to follow and protect us. He also has so many cute scenes! Scenes where he pats our head, scenes where we lay together, chat a lot together. He is devoted and loyal to us, never harming us even once.

We even get a scene where he gets jealous when we called Mr. Chopped cute with the cat headband! So, he also makes an attempt to be cute too! We are always together with him, and that makes us BOTH happy. Although we don't have our traditional romantic dates like shopping, movie night. We get a bed scene and get to take him back home with us.

There are many types of romance. Platonic and romantic. You the reader/player is allowed to view it however you want. The game does not punish you for the lack of interactions with the casts. You just end up missing out on certain scenes/moments with them is all. However, for the sake of this post I will be making attempts to talk about the romantic aspect (but platonic romance can also be put into place).

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Mr. Silvair

lt's apparent that Mr. Silvair keeps us as research material and confines us in his lair. He is interested in our body, and also interested in returning our mind/intellect back to its original state. It is this interest in us that makes him "love" us. Does confinement and research count as love? Well...maybe not in terms of human definition but in the Mr. Silvair way, it's the closest thing you can get to romantic (or platonic). Afterall, the concept of love has become lost in this world.

I believe he still has some attachment to us, because in the ending A Head's Life, he still keeps you as a companion along with Mr. Chopped. He claims that you are no longer useful/capable but that it is okay, as long as danger is no longer here. When you choose to ask him why he did what he did and ask if he likes you, he tells you it was for research and that love is something he cannot understand. He also doesn't understand why you get so angry when he helped you return your intellect back. He still though has some sort of concept of empathy, because in his route when you choose to kill him and hide yourself away. He comes follow you and expresses that he's sorry and tells you a little about himself. He allows you free will, at this point, allowing you to leave him or stay with him.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·

Mr. Gap

Mr. Gap always wants a piece of us, literally. Why does he? Because it's just for fun. The most interaction we get with him is through the multiple crevices within this world and the short route he gets in chapter 4. He takes but sometimes may give. However, he doesn't fail to be thoughtful. It's hilarious how in chapter 4 when he offers us a crowbar in exchange for your heart, you can just smack him for it with no consequences. He also likes to brag about himself to you which honestly is a little cute. With his ending Return, we only have him left in the 'other world'. Our comfort lies with him, although he may be a little annoying, he is the only one we have left. We maybe have become a little codependent on him, but maybe he likes that?

God his annoyed/disgusted face is so hilarious, do it again Mr. Gap! He seems to stick around with us mainly just for funsies and being nosy, and honestly, he is so real for that. But it seems he likes to stay around with us at least. In the return end he is with us, and continues to stay lurking, perhaps watching over us until he is needed. Quite handy am I right? Haha.

He is depicted as quite the gentleman, but also just as fun and teasing. There are times where he does help you with no charge, such as barging into his hole (the face he makes in that scene is hilarious). Again, when presented with beating him for your crowbar, he gets a little upset but, honestly still helps you out. He probably thinks violence is funny which is why he constantly still teases you by asking to take away your body parts. It's just too fun!

Someone had brought up to my attention that Mr.Gap tends to ask for parts that can be easy to part with as we progress. Asking for our feet, legs, and fingers instead, when he seems to still clearly prefer the heart over the other parts. He adjusts his request when he realizes we won’t give our heart.

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Mr. Chopped

Mr. Chopped is just a head; how can he possibly be or have anything romantic? Well, not necessarily to the level of Mr. Crawling but, we get to have a few small moments with him and spend some time with him. Since he is just a head, he can't help but need to rely on others. Of course, he has to be selectively about it because falling in the wrong hands devastates him.

Mr. Chopped when he gets forced into playing with the deer child, he seems happy to see a familiar face and calls us out to help him. Our poor baby was in trouble!

His ending head hunt is tragically sad but also bittersweet. MC cares so much about Mr. Chopped that she spends an eternity as an entity searching for a lost head, searching for Mr. Chopped who she failed to rescue.

During his own special route Mr. Chopped does his best to help us, but there is only so much a head can do. To make up for his lack of body though, he seems to be more expressive with his mouth and emotions. We get to take him to get a haircut and wash his hair. This seems pretty date like to me. Although our time was abrupt and short with Mr. Chopped. It makes me happy that we get this small, cute scene with him, which makes him much more lovable.

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Mr. Hood

Mr. Hood protects you from harm, and also heeds your commands. He also carries you around. He means no harm and is there to guide. He cares for your safety and seems to dislike anything dangerous or threatening towards him and others that he protects.

At the end of his route, he states how often you get in danger and takes you with him, telling you that he must protect you since you asked him to (referring to an earlier scenario when you asked him to stay with you, when you reunited with Mr. Crawling and the others, but he leaves). So I would assume he would always be by your side now eternally staying together and protecting you from danger when needed. How cute! Some people are into that. But personally, for me Mr. Hood felt more like a father/brother to me. Maybe it was because he was always willing to guide us? But some people are into the brotherly/fatherly type of men, and hey I don't judge.

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Mr. Machete

At first, I did not see the appeal to Mr. Machete, he seemed like a ghost that killed for boredom and most of the time we just followed him around aimlessly...WELL, after playing his route and letting it soak in my brain. That is entirely the whole point of his character. He is a ghost that had become bored because he had too much time on his hands and continues to search for his home. He is our tsundere dummy macho ghost, and honestly, I love that about him. He could've killed us again like how he tried earlier, but after that first attempt, he reluctantly allows us to follow him. It's funny how much he runs away if the odds are against him, and when he mocks us it's even more hilarious. Mr. Machete likes us if we are strong opponent for him, he even expresses that he thinks we are fun and likes us when we defeat Mr. Hugeface on our own.

Not going to lie, I fell for Mr. Machete right here. We were low on blood, and he just slices his hand, FEEDING us HIS BLOOD. Like OMG that was so hot, he opens our mouth forceful, and we drink his blood. He somewhat cares about us, to be doing all of that for us. After that we get a timed choice to stall or follow him. When you choose to stall he pauses with you and asks if you're okay and to catch up with him. For someone who had been reluctant and annoyed at us for following him, took a moment of his time to wait for you. He WANTED you to tag along with him. We then venture on with him aimlessly searching for his and our home. Torturing each other with our presences. But maybe, just maybe, they can slowly become that home together that they were searching for.

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Mr. Scarletella

I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. At first, he appears to be just any ghost that wants to attack us. It took me a while to warm up to him because of so little we knew about him. I thought he wanted to take our name for fun/or collection, but then it's revealed that he knows us. That he harbors some sort of love and obsession for us and believes that we love him because of all the blood and bodies we "offered" him. In a twisted way, this situation is a cute and romantic misunderstanding. Mr. Scarletella fell in love with us for providing him many blood and bodies. He wants us to spend an eternity with him. He WANTS to spend an eternity with us. He invites us to this other world because perhaps he wants us to become a ghostly being just like him, or maybe he wants to have easier access to us (since his myth that he only appears on rainy days) to meet us. Although we didn't get to have as many interactions with him, that is what makes this love toxic. It is a parasocial love, he fell in love with us from afar. When you piece everything together with your dictionary the words he proposes to you sound like wedding vows when you give your name to him. Which make it all so more lovely, even if he takes our soul away.

(My translation/interpretation of the scene, where he asks for your name)

Chapter 2, Scene 24

Scarletella: "You found your name...?"

Scarletella: "Teach me your name." (ARF ARF WRARF)

Scarletella: "I want you." (YES PLEASE)

Scarletella: "Will you give your name?" (OF COURSE)

Scarletella: "Your name?" (👁️👄👁️)

*You give him your name here*

Scarletella: "I have your name."

Scarletella: "I have obtained you." (YES YOU DID, COME TAKE ME)

Scarletella: "Let's leave together." (ARF ARF WRARFFFFFFFF)

Scarletella: "I love you"

Scarletella: "And you love me."

Scarletella: "You gave it to me...Thank you" (I'LL GIVE YOU IT ALL)

Scarletella: "Forever/eternally together..." (YES SIR)

Scarletella: "Together." (ARF ARF WRARRF ARFA)

He is quite the romancer hehe. It seems like Mr. Scarletella has some form of concept when it comes to love, which is to be together forever, even if you end up as a blood pool. Together is together.

I find it interesting how his two endings: Scarletella and Scarlet Rain parallels each other so well. In the Scarletella ending, we (mc unknowingly) give our consent to being together forever with Mr. Scarletella, but we are still alive. When MC wakes up, she sees a clear umbrella on the floor and picks it up. I believe that we have now embodied or spirited the umbrella, spending eternity with Mr. Scarletella. He owns us now.

However, in the Scarlet Rain end he becomes ours, the umbrella stays red, and we still, eternally are together forever.

[lenaswritingandstuff]

Dating the Slytherin boys (+ Harry) ▪ HEADCANONS

Requested: No

Characters: Mattheo Riddle, Tom Riddle, Theodore Nott, Draco Malfoy, Blaise Zabini, Regulus Black, Harry Potter (+ y/n)

Warnings: NSFW mentions, English is not my first language

A/N: I'm not sure I like this but here we go. However I have to say I like Regulus' one so I might turn his version into a one shot one day (when uni won't be killing me slowly). This will include also the pre-dating/flirting stage as well. SORRY FOR THE TYPOS. Comments and feedback are always appreciated. Enjoy! ^^

Tag list: @helendeath @im-jesus

Tag list for this story: @anawritez-posts @pumpkinchee @alwayslatetothefandoms

Mattheo Riddle:

His feelings for you probably confused him at first 

If he falls first, he either won’t let you know or will do everything to get your attention (‘Hey, y/n, come sit here, the seat is free!”, “y/n, do you mind helping me with the homework for Snape? I can’t bloody do it”, “How about we go to Hogsmeade, just you and me?”, “you look beautiful, y/n”)

Your love for him always calms him when he gets anxious or when he’s upset, especially after his father comes back

Will tell you things he never told anyone

Would rather spend time with you than with his friends

Is terrified something will happen to you because of his father 

VERY jealous, but trusts you

Despite easily getting angry, he can’t get mad at you. Even during arguments 

LOVES sleeping in your arms or when you just hold him

He's crazy about your body

Loves showering with you, and we both know how it often ends

HOT, passionate sex

Will randomly eat you out without expecting anything in return (doesn't mind if you return the favor, though)

100% calls you "baby" or "love" all the time

Doesn’t care about what anyone thinks of him as long as you love him

Your love makes him feel lighter and stronger

You're his whole world

Feels bad when he hears someone criticize you for dating him 

Always makes sure you don’t overwork yourself, and makes sure you get enough sleep, water and food, and comforts you when you're anxious

Holds your hands when he's anxious or stressed

Will listen to anything you have to say 

Crazy about your perfume

Theodore Nott:

Struggles to express his love or feelings in general, at least in the beginning 

Has never done serious relationships before, and it may cause some trouble in your relationship, as you end up believing he doesn’t care about you

It causes many fights, and the last one will be the first time he says ‘I love you’

Always goes to you for comfort 

Loves sleeping with you in his arms, or cuddling, and with time he can’t sleep without you

Loves watching you sleep 

Loves having you on his lap

Always gets you great gifts (even randomly)

“Well, it thought it was pretty, and…it reminded me of you.”

Will fight any guy who is rude to you or acts like a creep 

Very jealous (trusts you, doesn’t trust others)

Doesn’t mind PDA at all, will gladly hold your hand or kiss you in public

Always has a hand on your waist or his arm around your shoulders 

Very supportive in everything you do, even when he doesn’t understand it/isn’t really interested in it

Isn’t very good with comforting people (mostly because he's not used to it), but will hold you and listen to you as long as you need, can even give you advice/reassurance 

Every compliment/'I love you' you say melts his heart and means much more to him than he shows, same goes for anything you do for him

Loves doing fun things, even if it’s just throwing snowballs at each other during winter (which ends in loving kisses, just savouring the joy of being together)  

Love getting in a pool with you and playing "childish" games during summer

Any form of intimacy means A LOT to him 

He's used to hooks up and "fucking" but it takes him a bit of time to have sex with you (despite being crazy about you and your body) because you mean everything to him and with you it's really making love instead of just "fucking"

The first time is loving and slow yet passionnate (eye contact at all times, hands holding, desperate kisses from him), and it gets a bit rougher and passionate the next times (but aftercare, which he isn't used to, is always on point and keeps getting better)

Is secretly very insecure, and is terrified you will leave him (especially for another “better” guy) 

Craves your touch and your love but won’t admit it

His boggart is probably you being dead alongside his mother

Will tell you sweets things in Italian

Very clingy in private - and also in public with time

With you he learns to be happier and discovers a happier side of himself he didn't know he had

Loves you much more than he actually shows at first 

Will often say you're all he has (and means it)

But with time, you have no reason to doubt his love and he’s the perfect boyfriend

Blaise Zabini:

Probably will court you like the gentleman he is

He doesn’t trust people easily and might be a little distant (while always polite and kind) in the early stages of your relationship 

But with time he becomes very warm and smiles a lot

Always kisses the top of your hand or your forehead 

Doesn’t do much PDA except for holding hands and kisses on your forehead

However in private he’ll 100% cuddle you and hold you

Dates in parks or restaurants  

Get you flowers at least once a month

Will always defend you against others 

One of his love languages is acts of service

Lorenzo Berkshire:

You either were friends before dating or he fell in love with you at first sight, there is no in between

Takes you on fun dates (arcade, funfair, theme parks) 

Can be shy at the beginning, which will make it a bit hard for him to talk about how he feels about you

Movie nights where you two eats lots of snacks and sweets while cuddling 

Always smiles when you enter a room

So supportive 

Loves when you're on his lap

He has no problem with PDA

Quickly willing to meet your family if you agree

He’s a great listener and mostly gives good advices 

Loves taking naps with you 

Always makes you sure you get enough sleep, water and food

Won’t let you get yourself into dangerous situations

Loves to go anywhere with you, no matter the activity and even if he just follows you around 

Many pet names

If you're Muggleborn or grew up among Muggles, he will totally ask you questions about the muggle world

Passionnate sex, will get rough if he hasn't seen you in a long time or if it's angry sex after he got jealous

His aftercare is the best, and he's always thankful you trust him enough to have that form of intimacy with him

Draco Malfoy:

Won’t flirt at first with you but keeps wanting your attention

Tries to seduce you with expensive gifts, and is a bit taken aback when you say it doesn’t work

Continues to get you gifts, but will make sure they match your interests/tastes, and keeps expensive gifts for your birthdays and Christmas (even though he’d like to get them all year for you) 

At first he doesn't show any weakness in your presence

With you he’ll learn patience and to focus of more positive things, and also to stand up to his father

Takes you on dates every chance he gets

Will ditch his friends to spend time with you

Probably makes Crabbe and Goyle carry your bags or do things for you

So proud to be dating you, it might even make him more arrogant

Gets grumpy when jealous but after a kiss on the cheek he’s back to his normal self 

Will invite you to his home and write you nearly every day during holidays

Hates it when Harry or any Gryffindor boy tries to talk to you

Surprisingly has no problem with PDA

Loves when you come to see him play during Quidditch matches

Tom Riddle:

Oh boy

It started with him admiring/watching you from afar, for a reason he can’t understand

SUPER confused by what he feels for you and why

Will probably try to get closer to you through homework or through books if he sees you read one

Will know everything about you, and will secretly follow you, saving you if you’re in danger with you never knowing who saved you

Crazy about your perfume, so much so that it makes him steal one of your clothes just to be able to smell it anytime he wants

After a while, he’ll spend most of his time with you without ever admitting he likes it

Will probably let you know his feelings for you after he cast a spell on a guy for being a creep with you 

Won’t let another man touch you

Will ask Mattheo for advice to be better or to make you fall in love with him

Will do your homework without hesitation, even if he pretends that he hates it, and will leave explanations so you understand his answers/his work

No PDA except for holding hands or your hand under his arm, but will make sure to stay close to you at all times 

Is a surprisingly good listener 

VERY jealous, but surprisingly isn’t mad or suspicious at you

“Did you enjoy having his attention? Do you wish for me to show you how my attention is better?” 

He doesn't stress over homework or stuff like that, so he finds it ridiculous when you do (learns with time to be more understanding)

Will let flowers in your room with a note on it

Pretends to not care about the gifts you get him for his birthday or Christmas but it actually means so much to him as no one ever got him any gifts before 

Nothing the others say about him gets to him, but he gets angry when he hears someone say that you deserve better than him

As book!Tom who grew up in an orphanage: he's secretly insecure about his background and the fact that he’s poor, and thinks you deserve better 

As Voldemort: Might be torn between continuing his goals for power or spending a simple life with you; is aware you’ll leave him if he gets on a darker path 

As Voldemort’s son: would do everything to protect you from his father, and if he’s forced to get the Dark Mark, he will makes sure you don’t know 

Possessive kisses 

Would hurt anyone who does you wrong

Borrows money from Draco to take you on dates or to get you gifts, as he feels like you deserve the nicest things, even though you keep telling him his mere presence is enough

May feel a little bit guilty that he can’t properly show you his love like “normal” boyfriends do 

Won’t admit it but considers you the only good thing in his life, and if he ever lost you he’d get on a dark path

Won’t cuddle at first, but if you wake up first you’ll find him sleeping close to you, with at least one of his hands touching you

Always notices when you don’t eat, sleep or drink enough

You’re the first (and only) person he will feel romantic love for

He has a bit of sexual experience before, but with you it's completely different - once you guys have sex for the first time, he becomes obsessed with your body and how it makes him feel

Loves fingering you

"You like it, dove?"

Even if you guys don’t work out, he won’t ever be with somebody else 

Would ask your parents for you hand in marriage, but honestly it's just out of politeness, the only answer that matters to him is yours

Regulus Black:

Like Blaise, he was raised the old fashioned way

Acts coldly towards everyone except you, his tone and eyes gets warmer and kinder when talking/looking at you, and you’re the only person he’ll smile at

You were his best (and only) friend and he has been in love with you for years

He hides his feelings very well, but one day you start dating someone else (thinking Regulus doesn’t share your feelings) but he can’t bear it and confesses his feelings

Always defends you

He’ll take you on restaurants or picnics dates, always bringing flowers

Mostly fine with PDA (holding hands, hands on your waist)

Thinks he’s very lucky to have you

Probably already starts thinking of marrying you during your last year at Hogwarts 

A bit jealous, but can’t stand it when Sirius tries to talk to you

Will gladly do your homework with/for you

Loves it when you sleep in each other’s arms, loves feeling you close

Loves it when you call him “Reggie” (only you is allowed to)

Will literally do everything you ask him to

You’re everything to him

Can’t stay away from you for long

Will get worried if you’re five minutes late

Always calls you “sweetheart” or “love”/”my love” 

Slow, romantic sex most of the time but sometimes he needs to be rougher

Thanks to you he’ll feel lighter and he will become kinder

You’ll even make him change his views on blood purity and stand up to his parents, and with time he gets closer to Sirius thanks to that (and you) 

If that doesn’t change and he still joins Voldemort, he’ll leave you a letter before going to the cavern, saying how much he loves you and how much you mean to him

Harry Potter:

Don’t expect any pet names from him, but he might create a nickname with your name (like he calls Ginny ‘Gin’ in the Cursed Child) 

His love languages are fierce protectiveness, loyalty and a patience he didn’t knew he had

Has no problem with PDA because he doesn’t care about what other people think  

Loves cuddles

Rarely gets mad at you, and feels guilty when he does

Mostly gets mad at you when you hurt yourself (for example during Quidditch) but it's also because he was scared for you

Hot kisses in private

Will be jealous if he sees you with another guy 

He’s passionate in a lot of things he does, and it includes you and everything you do

Will fiercely defend you again anyone, can even throw hands

Gets FURIOUS when Umbridge hurts you during detention, and will cuddle you for hours and do everything he can to make the pain disappear

Knows people are mean to you during fifth year because you're dating him and he hates it

During that year the only peace he feels is when he's holding you or when you sleep in his arms (it's also the only time he doesn't get nightmares)

Very supportive 

Loves getting you gifts 

You make him feel SO happy, he’ll just keep smiling for no reason 

Gets more and more clingy with time

Always write to you during the holidays (you always invite him to come to your house)

I'm not sure about sex while you guys are at Hogwarts but he 100% feels lust for you, there will definitely be hot making sessions when you guys are alone in a dark corner of the castle and it often ends up with you against the wall with your legs around his waist while he kisses your neck and caresses your legs

However sometimes he just can't stop himself and will eat you out (even maybe finger you at the same time), and will be proud when you come

Any act of service you do for him means a lot

You're always worried about him when he's at the Dursleys but he reassures you that he's fine

Comes to you in the middle of the night if he has a nightmare and generally comes to you for comfort or to rant 

Needs you more than ever after Voldemort comes back and after Sirius’ death 

Misses you like crazy during his quest for Horcruxes, and he can’t bear the thought of something happening to you 

Might struggle to show it, but he knows and is thankful of how patient and comprehensive you are with him, and that makes him want to be the best boyfriend he can be

Terrified Voldemort might hurt/kill you

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[mac-tirs]

the usage of different types of english in elden ring

most human/tarnished NPCs we meet, like rogier, ansbach, and nepheli, use late modern english:

"a sorcerer, as you might have guessed. i'm looking for a little something, here in the castle. when i'm not hotfooting it from the troops, that is." - rogier, first meeting "general radahn. a pleasure to see you, after all this time. but those remains do not belong to you." - ansbach, upon summon for PCR

but older demigods like messmer, ranni, and morgott use early modern english:

"thou'rt tarnished, it seemeth. mother, wouldst thou truly lordship sanction, in one so bereft of light? yet… my purpose standeth unchanged." - messmer, pre-battle cutscene "thou needst not indulge them unduly, but they too wish to appraise thy worth. it hath been a passing long time since a newcomer entered my service, after all." - ranni, after agreeing to serve her

then there are the younger demigods, like miquella, malenia, and potentially melina, who use a later variant of modern english, similar to the tarnished NPCs we speak to:

"if we honour our part of the vow, promise me you'll be my consort. i'll make the world a gentler place." - miquella, post-PCR cutscene "the scarlet bloom flowers once more. you will witness true horror. now, rot!" - malenia, phase 2 transition cutscene

finally, the hornsent NPCs like the hornsent, hornsent grandam, and the hornsent spirits such as the one outside the whipping hut, who use late middle english similar to the english found in shakespeare's sonnets:

"fie, another? ... then, as that woman would surely say, we are in our purposes well aligned. but understand. your kind are not forgiven. the erdtree is my people's enemy. by marika long betray'd, set aflame." - hornsent, first meeting "all your resentment lingers yet... the raw stuff from which i shall surely forge a curse. upon the dastard messmer's head. upon marika's children each and all." - scorched ruins hornsent spirit

i find it interesting how different the usage of english is in the game, and i feel that it can be a hint on how to properly date an individual's occupation in the lands between/land of shadow. the hornsent, being a people much older than many in the lands between, use the most archaic version of english, while the tarnished and younger demigods use a form of english more closely related to our own in the current period. older demigods (and marika herself, as heard from melina's recounts of marika's spoken echoes) use a form of english more closely related to the period of transition from middle english to early modern english.

additionally, another interesting thing to me: mohg is almost certainly nearly the same age as morgott (since they're referred to as twins), yet he speaks a little differently compared to morgott:

"tarnished, thou'rt but a fool." - morgott, post-battle dialogue "dearest miquella. you must abide alone a while." - mohg, pre-battle cutscene

this makes me wonder if it's possible that, assuming that miquella's verbiage is indicative of his younger age in comparison to the older demigods (aka the demigods born before the marika/radagon union), miquella's charm altered mohg's perception enough to also alter his manner of speaking and carrying himself in some way. if his pursuit of finery (dressing in embroidered robes and handling himself with poise, juxtaposing his bestial growls and strength) was mainly done in an effort to fit into miquella's ideal of a consort. of course, mohg could just be as vain as he seems to be all on his own accord, but i find that it's interesting to entertain the idea that even his current state of being was due to miquella's charm.

i'd love to hear what others think about this. i'm not very learned when it comes to english (it's not really my first language), but i find this all very cool to think about.

[yanderenightmare]

your vocab is really rich, what's ur secret

Writing Advice: Vocabulary Tricks & Tips

Excellent request!

Read! And every time you stumble upon a word you've never noticed before or know but don't often use, put it in a list, write down its meanings, and try using it the next time you write! (I'll put my list at the end of the post)

Read different things! Different authors and different styles, especially poetry! I mean, if you're looking to fatten your vocab, reading poetry is one of the best ways to do it. Poetic writers must search far and wide for the perfect words to create rhymes and rhythms and audibly pleasing sentences---they practically do all the work for you! Honestly, I am so serious about this. One of the best things you can do is buy a fat compendium of poetry with all different authors and eras. Get you some Edgar Allen Poe, Sylvia Plath, Emily Dickinson, and Shakespeare if you want to hurt your head. Also! The same goes for music! Try listening to the lyrics---you'll probably hear some words you've never thought of using in your writing.

Here's a cheap trick for bilinguals---write something in your own language and put it through Google Translate. Honestly, I've found so many words just by doing this.

Every time you feel you've used a word too much, or anytime a word bores you to read, search up its synonyms and try using something you've never used before---don't stop the search until you're satisfied. Sometimes, it takes me more time to find just one word than it takes to write an entire post. Not only does this enrich your vocab, but you've probably just written a whole other sentence with newer meanings and more nuance!

Make your own synonym lists! Seriously! Because you can only find that many creative synonyms by searching up "word+synonyms."

Additionally! Think outside the box! Often, the best synonyms are those words that aren't actual synonyms at all. If you read poetry, you'll see poets use unorthodox words in place of something all the time---it's called a metaphor. Take flesh, for example---you can use fat, meat, muscle, brawn, beef---but you can also use cake, down, plume, pillow, softness, etc... I find this one especially useful for writing erotica, as you have to describe a lot of the same actions and body parts over and over and still make it interesting. (I'll add my synonyms list at the end of the post)

Also! This one is trickier, but instead of using words and synonyms, try making sentences that can replace the word instead---such as longer metaphors and fuller descriptions! This aligns with the literary device of "showing vs. telling." Of course, outright telling has its uses too and should not be disbarred entirely from writing, but often, it's showing that persuades the reader more. For example, instead of saying nervous, make sentences that describe how the character in question showcases nervousness---does their throat close up, do they sweat, do their eyes go wide, do they stutter, do they fiddle with their fingers, pick their nails, bite their lip, kick the ground, hunch their shoulders, look away, blush, flush, cry, run away or do they feel stuck? Describing these things helps the reader better understand the type of nervousness the character is experiencing. Hence, it makes for not only more interesting writing but also clearer writing!

A similar literary device is "focus and expanding," which slows down the reading or puts focus on certain aspects of the text by describing something to a great extent. If, say, this nervousness the example character is experiencing is of great significance, then that's what the readers' takeaway should be. But the reader won't think too much of it if the text simply states that they're nervous without underlining it. Luckily, there are plenty of ways of doing that, firstly through showing vs. telling, such as in the examples above, then metaphorically, such as "the ground seemed to swallow him up, down the guzzle of a monster with an appetite for disaster---darkness ensued like a storm cloud, cold and clawing with a weight heavy enough to nail him to the spot---all eyes were on him, unblinking and all-seeing, no matter what, he couldn't escape, he was stuck, glued to the ground by the soles of his shoes." I mean, the options are truly endless. These metaphors piled together are also a form of focusing and expanding, but you can take it even further than that by focusing on a small detail and giving it significance. For example, say the character is sweating because he's so nervous---you might focus on a single droplet of sweat instead of everything else, "A chill ran down his back. No, not a chill--sweat. Cold and creepily tracing the rigid bones of his spine. He can't move--if he moves, then they'll see. The sweat will seep into his shirt, and everyone will know what a sweaty and pathetic wreck he is. So, he can't move. No, yes, leave it alone. The droplet continues, running down the cold skin of his clammy back, sliding undeterred until meeting the band of his boxers and disappearing in the fibers. He swallows thickly and sighs with relief--only for another to pill at his nape, tracking the same course as the former. A vicious cycle is forming. He needs to get out of there!" And that's focus and expanding, folks! Focusing on something minuscule and expanding it by using it to describe what the character is feeling. It's a way to have a fresh take on something that's been written a thousand times before, such as "he was nervous."

Anyway, I might have gone a little above and beyond, but really, all these literary devices are ways of "expanding vocabulary" or at least giving an impression of it.

NEW WORDS

Manically---like a maniac

Despotic---like a dictator, having unlimited power over someone, often using it unfairly and cruelly

Chasm---a deep fissure, like a ravine, wound, or metaphorical rupture

Shunts---track-change basically, scoots to the side

Dearth---a scarcity or lack of something, a shortage

Raucous---making a harsh or loud noise

Innocuous---not harmful or offensive---harmless and safe, but also bland and unremarkable, maybe even a little boring

Lanyard---the woven necklace of a festival pass

Gossamer---fine spiderwebs, almost mesh

Cossetted---care for and protect in an overindulgent way

Beribboned---decorated with many ribbons

pupil-fat---cool way of saying enlarged pupils

Chitters---snickers, like a bird

Decadent---corrupt, depraved

Blotting---either soak up and absorb, or stain, or obscure

Barbell---a bar “pole” with attachments on each side

Bunting---of animals, when they butt or rub their head against you

Garnet---red

Cherubic---angelic, plump cuteness, quality of a child

Haunches---hips

Sodden---soaking

Waxing poetic---speaking in a flowery or poetical fashion

Inkwell---a container for ink---a dark well

Rend---tear in two, or more pieces

Ebb---recede, go back, like a tide wave

Webbed---like a duck's feet

Cloying---sickly sweet

Saccharine---oversweet

Apple of your cheek

Swathes---wrap, swaddle

Shroud---obscure something

Moonstone---to describe something grey and dusty, but pretty

Kinked---tangled, messy

Leaden---heavy, dull, slow or the colour of lead, grey

Stygian---devoid of light and brightness, hellish

Flaxen---of hair, champagne colored---ashy blonde

Tepid---lukewarm

SYNONYMS

Related to sucking cock:

Swallow

Glug

Drink

Eat

Guzzle

Receive

Take

Suck

Suckle

Slobber

Gargle

Gurgle

Drool

Gulp

Gobble

Stuff

Glut

Choke

Gag

Lap

Lick

Kitten-lick

Slurp 

Allow entry

Related to kissing:

Kiss

Lock/brush lips

Tongue-feed

Suck faces

Smooch

Peck

Snog

Canoodle

Related to biting:

Bite

Graze

Nip

Nibble

Sink teeth into

Chomp

Related to crying:

Whimpering

Mewling

Bleating

Whining

Snivel

Sniffle

Cry

Sob

Bawl

Hiccup

Spluttering

Blubbering

Coughing

Croaking

Related to pre-cum:

Ooze

Leak

Weep

Well

Drip

Dribble

Flow

Drain

Bleed

Sweat

Seep

Pill

Pearl

Cry

Related to fear and panic:

Hysterical

Wild

Manic

Uncontrolled

Unrestrained

Frantic

Frenzied

Restless

Hectic

Sporadic

Swivel-eyed

Related to screaming:

Scream

Yell

Wail

Yelp

Yip

Yammer

Squawk

Howl

Squeal

Shriek

Related to moaning:

Moan

Whine

Yelp

Purr

Hum

Croon

Related to overstimulated moaning:

Mumble

Croon

Warble

Quaver

Burble

Bumble

Hum

Slur

Ramble

Mutter

Whisper

Stammer

Stutter

Scramble

Jumble

Muddled

Babble

Blubbered

Splutter

Blurt

Related to groaning:

Groan

Grunt

Growl

Grumble

Grouch

Hiss

Guttural

Feral

Rusty 

Throaty

Wet

Sloppy

Related to angry noises:

Howl

Roar

Bark

Grizzle

Grump

Related to surprise or fear:

Gasp

Gulp

Choke

Suck in a sharp breath

Flinch

Jump

Jostle

Wince

Hiss

Pull back

Related to comforting:

Coo

Fuss

Comfort

Hush

Shush

Tsk

Mollycoddle

Nurse

Cuddle

Babying

Consoling

Soothe

Loving

Smothering

Hug

Hug tight

Cocoon

Snuggling

Swaddling

Rock back and forth with

Cosseting

Petting

Overwhelm

Related to begging:

Beg

Pleading

Pray

Bargain

Related to soreness and pain:

Ache

Sore

Throb

Swollen

Fattened

Welted

Related to taking cock inside entrance:

Swallow

Receive

Take

Suck inside

Stuff

Fill

Allow entry

Submit to

Ease inside

Bully inside

Squeeze inside

Force inside

Push

Pry

Related to how the hole squeezes:

Kissing

Fluttering

Hugging

Pressing

Squishing

Squeezing

Tightening

Pulsing

Related to a wet hole:

Slush

Squelch

Squishy

Creamy

Sloppy

Wet

Soaked

Slosh

Sop

Cry

Slick

Weep

Drool

Gush

Swollen

Velvety

Gummy

Cotton

Silken

Satiny

Related to thrusting:

Squeeze into

Pound

Jam

Ram

Rut

Loll

Rock

Thrust

Stuff

Bottom out

Fill

Fit

Nestle

Cram

Prodding

Poking

Kissing

Hammering

Jack-hammer

Smack

Slap

Ream

Related to pleasure:

Ecstatic

Opium-eyed

Euphoric

Elated

Thrilled

Blissed-out

Rapturous

High

Cloudy

Numb

Related to overstimulation:

Overstimulated

Outdone

Aching

Burning

Sweating

Feverish

Delirious

Febrile

Numb

Immobile

Dazed

Dull

Related to being dumb, high, or overstimulated:

Ditzy

Dumb

Clumsy

Silly

Foolish

Giddy

Brainless

Dizzy

Fuzzy

Dopey

Whimsical

Fickle

Featherbrained

Daft

Hare-brained

Awkward

Graceless

Blundering

Bumbling

Klutzy

Clueless

Cloddish

Dense

Related to the body and the flesh:

Tender

Supple

Soft

Creamy

Plush

Doughy

Cakey

Downy

Pillowy

Malleable

Squeezable

Biteable

Pliable

Touchable

Putty

Plume

Related to cuteness:

Cute

Cherubic

Adorable

Sweet

Soft

Precious

Darling

Lovable

Endearing

Baby

Related to weak or smallness:

Breakable

Brittle

Weak

Fragile

Dainty

Delicate

Frail

Flimsy

Vulnerable

Petite

Small

Little

Tiny

Feeble

Defenseless

Powerless

Helpless

Worthless

Hopeless

Related to struggling:

Struggle

Winding

Striving

Straining

Toiling

Playing

Wriggle

Wiggle

Twist

Shake

Tremor

Shiver

Quake

Related to men:

Vulgar

Loud

Oafish

Rough

Rude

Rustic

Gruff

Gross

Doltish

Barbaric

Bearish

Beastly

Churlish

Coarse

Swinish

[woso-soso]

Missing Puzzle Piece Pt.1

Mapi Leon x Reader x Ingrid Engen

Summary: Mapi and you have been together for years, what will happen when a new person makes an appearance in your lives.

Word Count: 3,639

Part 2

Any time words are Italicized it indicates another language being spoken, in the case of this story it will indicate Spanish is spoken.

You’d known María for years, having met when you were barely big enough to ride the fair rides that came into town every year. Meeting at a volleyball camp held at your town's community center, and while María thrived at it you found yourself cowering in the back. Shrinking further into yourself as you struggled to integrate into the game, finding yourself more so on the end of flying balls. Balls you weren't prepared to hit back, leading to more than one frustrated groan from the team you had been forced onto. By the time lunch had come around you were left to sit alone at one of the tables set up, that was until a wild haired girl came bounding over. A smile wide across her face as she sets her lunch down at the seat across from you. You hadn’t caught her name at introductions, having been more focused on not puking on your shoes than learning anyone's names.

“I’m María,” she said, her mouth full of food. “But everyone except my mama calls me Mapi.” 

You stare at the strange girl in front of you, her arms covered in doodles. Many of them being extremely detailed, maybe the two of you would have something to talk about after all. “I’m Y/N,” you whisper hoping the much louder girl will be able to hear you. 

“So why are you here Y/N, I mean not to be rude but like you seem to hate it,” Mapi remarks not looking up from the food in front of her as she continues to shovel it into her mouth at a speed that was honestly impressive. 

“My papa, he got the dates mixed up when registering. I was supposed to be at the art camp next week but now I’m stuck here instead.” You answer somberly. Your papa was doing his best, becoming a single parent suddenly hadn’t been the plan and the two of you took it in stride together. Even when he did mess up, at least he was trying. 

“So you like art,” Mapi’s interest piques as she finally slows down to look up at you. You nod softly as you pick at the simple sandwich in front of you. Something you had thrown together that morning because your papa had forgotten to pack lunch the night before. “What do you like to do?”

“Well, I like drawing. My papa just got me a ton of new pencils to try. But I also really like taking pictures. I have this film camera at home, papa says when it's full we can send it off to get them developed. Apparently it's a long process.” The camera had been something your therapist had suggested, she thought it would benefit your dad to see what piques your interest. Helping get inside your mind since getting you to talk was a challenge. “Do you like drawing,” you inquire hesitantly, looking again at the intricate doodles that covered Mapi’s arms. 

“I love drawing, my mama says I get ink everywhere but I like drawing on my arms. At least then I get to see them all the time.” Mapi’s answer intrigues you. You could see the cap of a ballpoint pen stick out the top of her shirt having been clipped inside to attempt to conceal it. 

“I like that,” you state, a soft smile crossing your face as you look Mapi in the eyes. Her own large smile somehow getting larger. 

“Come here,” Mapi says suddenly, “would you like some drawings of your own.” You nod cautiously, moving around the table to sit next to the taller girl. Wiping her hands on her shorts before grabbing the ballpoint pen. “Here, stretch out your arm,” her hand gently takes your forearm, extending it across the table so it lays flat palm up. The pen tickles, but quickly you grow used to it. Mapi works slowly, making small marks across your arm as you relax into the feeling. 

The rest of the day is less anxiety-inducing as you switch over to the same team as Mapi, her presence not only calming but protective as you were able to hide behind her. Avoiding any more unwanted contact with volleyballs. When your papa comes to get you you can see him eyeing the ink marks across your skin, a relieved smile crossing his face as he watches you wave to Mapi her matching ink marks clear on her skin. 

“So did you make a friend today?” He questions cautiously. 

“I think I did papa,” a bright smile appearing on your face for the first time in a long time. 

“You got in!,” Mapi shouts gleefully, her arms wrapping around your body. The letter grasped tightly in your hand as happy tears trail down your cheeks. 

After meeting Mapi the two of you quickly became tightly bonded. Spending many evenings camped out in each other's bedrooms exploring different art mediums, a football game usually playing in the background as you talked softly. Mapi had always encouraged your photography, she insisted that while you were one for few words your photos always told a story. It was because of her that you got up the courage to apply to art school, the same art school Mapi had gotten into and while she chose to focus on football and not attend you knew it was still the best place for you. 

“I did it, I can’t believe I did it,” you mumble into her shoulder. Your tears leaving a damp spot on her shoulder. 

“I knew you could do it, your mama would be so proud,” Mapi whispers softly, her hand stroking your hair. A new wave of tears starting at the thought of your mama. She had been gone for so long yet it felt like just yesterday she had been showing you her own camera, a camera locked up safely in the attic. 

You pull away from Mapi’s warm embrace slowly, your arms staying connected around her neck. Your stomach twisting as you stare into her eyes, you knew you had feelings for her. It would almost be weirder if you didn’t, the two of you had been inseparable since you were small. You had been there for her through hundreds of football games where she dominated over the boys and she had been there for you while you displayed your photographs at various school events. She knew you front and back, like a book she had read a million times and you knew her the same. Before you can even think about what you're doing you lean in, Mapi making no move to pull away as your lips connect. 

Mapis lips are slightly chapped, yet taste like strawberry as if she had just applied chapstick. Her arms tighten around you, pulling you in closer as the kiss becomes more frantic. The pent up attraction between the two of you coming out full force. The sound of your front door closing being the only thing to snap the two of you apart. Your face most certainly flushed bright red as you stare at the carpeted floor under your feet. 

“I’m sorry,” you breathe, quickly wiping your face clean of any chapstick. The strawberry scent lingering. 

“Why?” Mapi asks quietly, leaning back on your bed. Watching you as your brain races a mile a minute. 

“I shouldn’t have just jumped you like that, I just… I assumed things and I’m sure they aren’t correct,” your voice cracks as you try to keep from crying. Embarrassment is clear on your face with your blazing red cheeks. 

“How do you know,” Mapi asks. 

“How do I know? Because come on Mapi look at you and look at me, it's silly to think we could be anything more than friends.” You mumble.

“Well firstly, best friends. Secondly, what do you mean look at you? You are the most amazing person I know, I’m honored you like me that way. I’ve liked you for a long time now, I just never had the courage to say anything.” The two of you sit in silence for a moment, Mapi’s words hanging in the air. 

“Really?” You whisper, turning to look at her. 

“Really,” Mapi says, her hand taking yours. 

The two of you are practically inseparable after that, wherever Mapi goes you are sure to follow. For years you worked at small photography studios, focusing on simple family portraits, weddings, and other parties. But by chance there was a day you got asked at the last minute to photograph Atlético Madrid's game against Real Sociedad. Atlético’s regular photographer had fallen ill and of course Mapi took this as a chance to throw your name out there. Sure some of her teammates were aware of your relationship but that didn’t seem to be a hindrance as you trekked out to the sidelines of the pitch, camera and monopod in hand. The game goes well, except for the occasional stray ball you stay safely tucked away capturing the high emotions of the game. 

“Did you get my good side,” Mapi jokes as she approaches, her cheeks flushed from having just finished a full ninety minute game. 

“Now when did you develop a bad side?” Your eyebrows raise in question as you continue to pack up your gear, preparing for a long night at home editing.

“Just checking, just checking” Mapi smirks, hands raised in surrender as she turns to take off back towards her teammates. 

While that night is long. You curled up on the couch as Mapi’s head rests in your lap, her soft snores reminding you how late it was, your hand gently combing through her hair as you edit the lot of photos you had taken. Only finishing as the sun begins to rise, a nagging headache forming behind your eyes as you close your laptop. 

“Come on love, let's go sleep properly,” you grunt as you nudge Mapi off your lap. 

“What time is it?” Mapi groans as you drag her to her feet. Her eyes barely opening enough to see her surroundings. 

“It's either very late or very early, let's not think about it.” You say as you push her into bed, joining her on the other side. Burying yourself under the covers, hoping for at least some restful sleep. 

What you hadn’t expected to come from the game was a permanent job offer from Atlético. They insisted they needed a photography assistant and that if you wanted it you were more than welcome to have it. It wasn’t something you even need to consider, quickly accepting the offer on the table. In the three years you were with Atlético you learned as much as you could, following the lead photographer like a shadow. Getting to know the coaches and players, learning where to draw boundaries with Mapi, you may be together but you weren’t about to risk either of your jobs because of it. 

That's what made it so hard to leave, when Barcalona came knocking at Mapi’s door it would have been stupid to say no. But the dread of having to start over in a new city made you nervous. You were already away from home most of the time, only seeing your papa a few times a year. You had finally established a career in Madrid, but at the same time you knew you couldn’t be away from Mapi. The two of you moved in tandem for a reason, you were two pieces to the same puzzle. You would rather put your career on hold to be there for her then be in Madrid, alone. 

Things fall into place easily in Barcelona, a job as an editing assistant for the men's team opens up only a few weeks after you move in with Mapi. Sure it wasn’t where your passion lied but it was something. 

“How are you settling in my love,” Mapi asks one morning as the two of you laid together in bed, the sun leaking in through the slightly open curtains. Her hand tracing shapes along your spine. 

“It’s okay, I wish I was with the women's team but it's okay, it's a start.” You knew deep down your only actual chance to work with the women's team would be if someone leaves, and who would leave working for the most successful team in the league. 

“It will happen one day, they will see just how talented you are and they won't be able to deny you the  job you want.” You appreciated Mapi’s optimism, she had always been your biggest cheerleader. Reassuring you throughout the years as the two of you grew and changed with one another. 

“Thank you my love, we can hope, but let's not get them too high.” You whisper softly, tracing the tattoos that cover Mapis arms only stopping once your alarm interrupts your morning peace. 

The two of you go your separate ways when you hit the gate at work, her slipping off to practice as you make your way down the never ending hallways. Passing offices of people important enough to have actual doors, eventually settling into your small cubical towards the back of the room. A place you can tuck yourself into and hide from the rest of the office. 

This continues for years, Mapi and you continent in your relationship never really sharing it with others outside of your family and friends. Your social media staying very much private, especially as you start to get more attention from fans of the team for the photographs you take, having been promoted to the men's team head photographer. You were happy, sure you had hopes and dreams you were still working towards but you found yourself fond of the simple everyday routine that you and Mapi had formed. 

That was until you literally ran into a goddess. 

The tall dark haired beauty had exited the main conference room right as you were passing, not a chance for either of you to stop as you collided. The box of hard drives crashing to the ground as she grabs your arm to stabilize you. 

“I’m so sorry,” the brunette says quickly, a thick accent making it challenging for you to understand. Your limited understanding of English not aiding in the matter. 

“It.. is.. okay,” you stammer out, hoping you said something okay. The soft smile on the woman's face giving you some reassurance that you had. 

“I’m Ingrid, I just signed on with the women's team.” The woman you now know as Ingirid declares, her hand extended towards you. Your mind going blank as you gently take her hand. 

“I am Y/N,” you say with less confidence than her. 

“Well, it's very nice to meet you Y/N.” Ingrid declares, dropping your hand to bend down and retrieve the box you had dropped. Thankfully none of the hard drives had fallen out. 

And with that she was gone, your mind racing at warped speed. The tingle on your skin from where she had been holding your arm reminding you of the feelings that had coursed through you. A sudden wave of nausea washing over you as Mapi popped into your mind, your fun, sweet, goofy Mapi. How you could even think of another woman, one you don’t even know, one who will have to work with your LONGTIME partner. This sudden feeling of guilt settling into your stomach. 

You avoid the topic with Mapi for the next few days, a weird silence falling over your shared apartment any time work is brought into the conversation. You know she can tell something is wrong, you can feel her watching you as you try to keep yourself distracted in the apartment. Being barely able to sit still for more than a few minutes at a time this sudden influx of anxiety being clear as day to anyone who knows you. 

It isn’t until one late night when you get home from traveling with the mens team that you and Mapi finally talk. She had stayed up late, catching you as you snuck in the front door.

“Please, my love, come talk to me. Somethings wrong, I can tell.” Mapi’s words make your heart ache, looking into her eyes you see someone who so desperately wants you to open up. Something that you had never seen before, up until now you and Mapi had never had issues communicating. Communication was actually one of the things the two of you pride yourselves on, something many of your friends were actually stunned by when they first learned how open the two of you are. 

You take your time to drop your bags, sliding your shoes off as you close the door behind you. The pit of anxiety growing more into a black hole. Sitting down next to Mapi on the sofa, not daring to look at her. The two of you sitting in silence for what felt like hours, Mapi’s hand gently grasping yours. 

“What is going on in your mind my love,” Mapi whispers softly as she tucks a loose strand of hair behind your ear. 

“I… I um, I met one of your new teammates last week.” You swallow, tears pricking at your eyes as guilt eats away at you. “She bumped into me in the main offices,” you whisper looking over at Mapi as she watches you intensely. 

“Did she do something to you?” Mapi asks, a hint of urgency in her tone. 

“Nothing bad I promise, she probably doesn’t even remember meeting me. But… when she held my arm to keep me from falling I got this feeling.” You turn away from Mapi again, not wanting to see the look on her face. “And I hate this feeling, it's a feeling I’m only supposed to have with you, yet my skin burned where she held it. I feel like I’m betraying you even though I haven’t done anything.” 

You don’t dare look at Mapi, her hand hasn't left yours and she never shifts further away from you. But this feeling of guilt settles in your stomach, the fear that she will be angry at you for your unwanted thoughts lingers in the back of your mind. 

“Who was it?” Mapi asks after a few long moments. 

“What?” The shock is evident in your voice as you snap your head to look at her. Having expected anger, not curiosity. 

“What is her name? Who is it?” She asks again, meeting your eyes, a soft squeeze of your hand reassuring you. 

“She said her name is Ingrid. I think she just signed on with the team.” Sharing the only information you had. 

Mapi takes a moment to process what you had said, gently wiping the tears from your cheeks as she takes you in. “It’s okay,” she reassures after a moment. “I am guilty of the same,” Mapis' words shocking you. 

“What?” You hiccup. 

“I have had the same feelings you have had for her, I’ve been struggling with them to my love. She is… enticing to put it simply. I don’t blame you for feeling this way about her.” Mapi’s words both alarm you and reassure you. You had felt some security in knowing that while you held these feelings there was no way you were going to interact with Ingrid again. But knowing that Mapi also held those feelings, for someone she is seeing everyday, traveling with, showering with. A sudden wave of fresh tears form in your eyes. 

“You… you like her too. Were you ever going to tell me?” You ask suddenly, pulling your hand away from hers.  

“Of course I was, it's not like I would ever dream of acting on those feelings. I was worried about you. You’ve been acting off.” Mapi defends. 

“I’ve been acting off because I find this person attractive, the same person you apparently find attractive. A person you will be spending time with, alone.” A tone that isn’t anger but more so anxiety present in your voice. 

“I’m not going to ever act on it, I love you, that isn’t changing.” Mapi insist. 

“But what if you eventually find you are loving her? She seems charming, pretty. What do I have to compete.” 

“You aren’t competing my love, there is no competition.” Mapi’s words hang in the air as you process all that has been shared. 

But what if you want to share? The thought of Ingrid making your heart flutter, not in the way Mapi makes it flutter but in a way that feels like she completed the puzzle the two of you were pieces in. Your love for Mapi hadn’t changed, it had only grown over the years, but the thought of Ingrid felt like your heart was whole. 

“What would you think if I thought dating Ingrid would be appealing, if I thought she would fit in well with us?” You ask hesitantly. 

“Are you asking if I would want to open our relationship?” Mapi asks. 

“Not open, it wouldn’t just be anyone. Just Ingrid.” You respond, watching Mapi out of the corner of your eye. 

“I… I wouldn’t be opposed, not if she would be okay with it. She would have to want both of us, I’m not losing you because of someone else.” Mapi whispers. 

“I don’t think you would have to ever worry about losing me.” You say softly as you place a gentle kiss on Mapi's cheek. “Let's think of it this way, if Ingrid shows any interest we consider it. But we will not tarnish us by seeking it out, okay?” 

“I’m okay with that,” Mapi agrees, her arms wrapping around you tightly as the two of you sink back into the couch. A million thoughts racing through your mind as everything that has happened catches up to you.

[baddiewiththebook]

ONE OF THE BOYS [PART 2]

-> While you pine hopelessly over your best friend, Eddie Munson. You hear the sentiment 'one of the boys' one too many times and you've decided to change that. All in the name of the one boy who won't even look at you, or so you think.

-> eddie munson x you (she/her)

-> friends to lovers, slow burn, angst

-> warnings - strong language and suggestive themes [no smut]

-> a/n I tried to tag everyone I saw, but some of y'all weren't linking. Also, there is a part three because part two became so long. Whoops!

[Part 1] Part 2 [Part 3]

-> <-

“You're eventually going to have to talk to them,” Robin shimmies her backpack into the empty chair next to her rather than being strewn across the lunchroom table. “As far as they know, you changed your hair and your clothes and now you hate them.”

You place your lunch tray onto the open space, then sit across from her.

Distancing from your friends was cruel, and you knew that. Robin is also right. Still, you wake an hour early to get to school ahead of them. Taking windy pathways past the gymnasium that stunk of socks to avoid Eddie on his way to his classroom that is two doors away from yours. You carry all of your heaviest books now because Gareth’s locker is across from yours. You do regret leaving that sandwich in your locker though. Gross.

With a routine schedule, two months have flown by without a hitch in the plan. Robin likes sitting with you at lunch, but she does wish you chose to sit here rather than watching you screw away at a tight bond with the boys over at the other table.

Things were desperate by the first week when you shoved toilet paper up your nose in order to fib to Eddie that you were too sick to go anywhere. You missed two days of class just so you could keep away from him.

Then, there was the band performances. You never missed a single night that Corroded Coffin played music at the scrappy biker bar at the outskirts of town. The boys had stopped inviting you after “missing two,” but you snuck into the shadows in the back of the bar. No one really bothered you there. Stage lights distracted the performers enough to where they could only see the front row of drunks.

All of the practice in Gareth’s garage paid off. Corroded Coffin was good - no, excellent. You were so proud of the boys.

You wish you could tell them.

And, so, maybe Robin is right. All of this running around is silly and reckless. You miss all of your friends dearly. Even Eddie, who still you find absolutely and undoubtedly the most complicated soul you ever met in your entire life. Your friendship is more to you than desperately clinging to his ankle like a shaken chihuahua in heat.

Maybe there is a part of you that still wishes he’d see. All the effort you put into your hair, your skin and your nails isn’t just about proving that you aren’t just one of the guys. You knew this from the very beginning. Still, even after your conversation with Gareth that one night, you still play out this plot a little longer.

You like the shiny bling and the tighter clothes that get you a bit more attention. But, you didn’t have to change yourself completely - right?

“Isn’t it time for me to mingle with people who have similar interests as me?” You say finally out of your head. Snagging one of Robin’s fries, you drop down in the seat across from her.

“You've proven you can be a chick with or without that frizzy haired freak. Don't act like you don't like the same stuff they do,” she flicks your jacket, which has hours of patchwork done. You had sewn on patches of your favorite bands. Most of the bands, you had learned from Eddie, himself.

Hours of listening to music together in his trailer, while sharing a blunt. Eddie would get a wind of energy and then he’d leap onto his bed for a solo performance. Fingers stroking a guitar that never existed. You laugh as he tumbles over his mattress, and he tells you that’s when the crowd will carry him - to victory!

You warm at the memory.

Eddie is the only person at his lunch table. Kicking his foot up onto an empty chair, he lounges and he waits for his friends. He’s always the first to get there because his class is so close to the cafeteria. It takes Gareth and Jeff a longer time because they come from the gym. And, the freshman come from the opposite side of the school, so they take the longest to get to the cafeteria.

“Go on,” Robin nudges you. “I’ll see you in math later.”

By the time Robin kicks you thrice in the shin, you get over your worries. You want to patch your friendships up with the boys, but you’re not sure what to tell them. Explaining the truth felt horrific. That you like - er - liked Eddie. Gareth’s confession in the kitchen.

Yeah, the truth seems far fetched.

Your second option is to beg for them to quit calling you ‘one of the guys,’ but that too came off risky. You've never had a problem with their comments before, or their disgusting antics and habits. Once you smell a Jeff fart, then all of the other farts seem forgiving. Seriously, no one should ever give him cheese again. Yet, they do.

Anyway, talking to Eddie first feels less daunting then to come up to all of them at once. But, with your stalling, your wish comes to late. The boys rush the table, hollering and whooping like unkept animals.

You stop in your tracks fully when you see two women beeline for the table. They never invite people to their table. Or at least, they never invite just anyone.

Roxie is easy to recognize. Candy coated red lips meet that of Eddie’s pale cheek that blushes a deep crimson at the affection. Eddie hangs his head, so he can smack a wet kiss to her lips. She uses a free hand to swipe the spare lipstick from his mouth.

“Sweetheart,” Eddie cooed.

Roxie touches his hair in a way that makes his eyes droop low, and he rests his head on her chest. All while he keeps his conversation with Jeff going.

Meanwhile, the other woman is her opposite.

Brunette hair cascades down her back, and tangles amongst her woven sweatshirt. Arms wide open with her slender fingers covered by the net sweater she hid under. She sneaks up on Gareth, and hangs over his neck. Gareth cranes his neck, and whispers in her ear making her laugh sweetly. He touches her wrist with gentle fingers and he pushes her glasses up the bridge of her nose with his free hand, before they have a chance to slip further down her face.

“Indie!” Dustin shouts.

The girl hanging from Gareth picks her head up, and grins with a shining sparkle in her eye at the young freshman. She reaches over to ruffle his hair.

You panic.

Slamming into someone’s shoulder, you apologize and you retreat like a mouse being stepped on. Time slows down. You move around people as fast as your feet will carry you.

You can hear your breath in your ears meeting up with your heart banging against your ribcage.

Robin calls to you, but you can’t hear her. Blood rushes through you, and you swear your can feel the swimming and the tingling. Your fingertips tingle when you push open the door into the hallway.

Technically speaking, you couldn’t be out here if you're on our lunch period. A few classes still go on, but mostly the teachers didn’t want anyone to catch them smoking in their classrooms where they shouldn’t be. It’s not like the smell lingers.

Somewhere down the hallway, a classroom is having a heated debate. Voices bounce from wall to wall. Echoing into your eardrums. All. Too. Much. You aim for the big showy doors at the front of the building.

Cool damp air hits your cheeks. Trees stand tall. Birds hold meetings on their branches. They sing soft melodies. Outside smells earthy.

Immersing yourself in the sourness of the damp remains of rainfall, you slow your jagged breathing. Your heart beat regulates.

Keys trembling in your fist, you find your car parked not too far away in the parking lot. Some asshole has blocked your passenger side in, so even if you wanted too you wouldn't be able to get in that way.

Kicking yourself for taking the cowards way out, you catch a tearful glimpse of yourself in the mirror. Mascara slips down your cheeks. Your drowning in two inches of water.

Eddie's bandana sits in your glove compartment. It still remains his with the lingering tang of old cigarettes and sweat. You told him if he left that nasty thing in here that you'd wash the stink out.

You haven't.

Clinging to a tissue, you use that to pat your face dry. Dabbing at your eyes, you don't want to disturb your makeup. Funny how a few months ago, you would be scrubbing your cheeks raw to get anything off of your face.

The tapping on your window startles you because you think a teacher has seen you. However, you find only Robin with a pitiful expression on her face. She waves for you to roll down your window, then holds out your backpack and your jacket that you’ve left behind in your scurry to get out of school.

“You left your things,” she looks at your puffy eyes and your worn out makeup. “Are you okay?”

“No,” you reach out for your things, only to put them in the passenger seat next to you, “I think I’ll go home.”

“Indie is a really nice girl-,”

“I’m not worried about Indie.”

Robin winces at the sharpness of your tone slicing through the air like butter. You apologize to her.

“I’m going to go home, Robin.”

“Roxie and Eddie are only going to last for a day - I guarantee,” her shoulders bobble. “It’s Roxie.”

“Yeah,” you say thinly.

Robin taps your car. “Get home safe.”

“Will do,” you say. “Thank you.”

-> <-

When you arrived at school the next day, you're in class for less than fifteen minutes before your name blasts on the intercom to report to the main office. Robin salutes you from her seat in the back of home room like you’re taking a final walk, before they take you around the back and shoot you between the eyes. Well done, soldier.

Although not as dramatic, you were served a detention slip for after school. You suspected as such, since you left halfway through school without an explanation. Next time you'll go to the nurse, and heat up the thermometer with your tongue. Give her a cough, or a sneeze and she would send you home.

You tap your fresh manicure across the etchings in the desk. Profanities. Markings of once was, and forever will be.

Low rumbles cause for distraction. You pick a desk next to a window where you see the gray clouds clustering in close. They spit at the ground. Droplets of water slip across the glass. You guess which droplet will get to the bottom first, and silently cheer the winner.

Your eye drifts to the front of the class where your chest rises and falls at the next person to walk through the door. All those months of hiding your head felt worthless when Eddie shows up.

For a moment, you think, he’s looking right at you. You swallow, but you try waving. Eddie does ignore you and plops himself into a chair at the front of the classroom. His backpack drops with a thunk.

Tipping your attention back to the window, the rain comes down harder in flashes of wet thunder and lightening. Dark and stormy weather is your favorite. Because, after the rain stops, you like splashing in every puddle until you can’t see the color of your boots anymore.

You can’t do that in your new sneakers. Not a speck of dust on them. Barely out of the box.

“Everyone in their seats,” a man in a blazer walking with an arch to his spine tells us. He hovers at the front of the classroom with both hands on his desk, while peering just above his square framed lenses. Wild gray hairs stick out on end near his ears. You wonder if he’s done this on purpose to accentuate that despite he’s bald on top of his head, he still in fact has hair. “I’m Mr. Clark, and this will be an hour long detention session.”

You came prepared with notebooks and homework to do for the next hour.

“I’ll be taking attendance, and then you may quietly do your homework or read . . . for all I care, bang your head against the desk just be quiet,” he aims the metaphorical bullet at Eddie and misses, and hits the wall just over the top of his head.

Eddie clicks his teeth. “You got it teach.”

“Mr. Munson,” Mr. Clark groans. “Will I ever get tired of seeing your face?”

Eddie grins famously. “Oh, you know you’ll never get tired of me, Dick.”

“It’s Richard,” he clears his throat, then straightens his tie, “Mr. Clark to you.”

You miss the banter. The smart mouth Eddie that has you drooling. Oh, God, please resist getting sucked in again.

The notebook in front of you has pages of blank white paper. You focus on filling in the lines with your math equations.

“Solve for E,” you tell yourself in a hushed whisper. “What ever happened to X?”

So, you solve for E.

You raise your hand when your name is called for the attendance. Pretending that Eddie didn’t whip around at your name, instead you solve for E. You solve for E because E is the equivalent of- E is the equivalent of-

Eddie can’t help, but watch your eyebrows get closer and closer to your nose. You get frazzled easily when you know you’re close to an answer that’s on the tip of your tongue.

You’re breaking now. Keeping your head down, as Eddie burns holes into the top of your head. E isn’t an equivalent of anything. E is the most complex and confusing letter of the alphabet. You swore up and down that you would avoid E. E’s in front of you. There’s no way to escape E for an entire hour. Even when you think you've solved E, you still have to see E living in a trailer across from you. E’s lights still on. Eating. Watching TV. Changing. Sleeping. Dreaming.

Crap, you are not thinking about the fifth letter in the alphabet. And, you are certainly not thinking about math.

You throw down your pencil in frustration.

Eddie waits for Mr. Clark to finish his attendance taking. In mere moments, the old geezer passes out despite his fifth coffee of the day. He rocks back in his chair, arms at his side with a trail of drool spilling out down his chin.

That’s when Eddie moves.

“Hey,” you have your head down on your desk by now, but Eddie doesn’t care.

He doesn’t understand why you’re avoiding the group. Obviously, he misses when you would sit at the table and you correct his homework from the night before. You’re too smart for him. Eddie knows this. You’re more than a brain to him, though. The way you speak with your hands more and more when you get excited.

Eddie likes to pretend not to understand why he gets nervous when you lean over his shoulders to show him how to work out a problem in one of his classes. He pretends to not notice the scent of your soap that smells so sweet and delicious. That the smell lingers when you leave.

What he can't shake, however, is why you haven’t been speaking to him for the last two months. Darting into empty classrooms when you think he’s not looking. When your home, you'll keep the lights off or low enough that he might forget you’re home (he doesn’t). And, you think you’re clever sneaking into the back of his performances with the band, but Eddie sees you there dancing by yourself with a grin on your face that could break apart the gray days and bring back the sunshine. You haven’t missed a single performance yet.

So, where have you been?

You bring your head up from the table because you know Eddie is smarter than to think you’ve fallen asleep. Sometimes you talk, or you twitch your arms - Eddie’s seen this when you knock out after a long day. He'll let you sleep there, but he'll take off your shoes so that you're comfortable. And, he'll even place a blanket over you because you'll start to shiver. But, he never stays. He doesn't want you to wake up because Eddie is notoriously clumsy. Instead, Eddie would sneak into the living room twiddling his thumbs making no noise until you wake up. He wouldn't turn on the television. He wouldn't warm anything up in the microwave. He wouldn't even open his fridge. He would sit on the floor of his living room kicking his feet together, and plucking at the carpet fibers.

You never sleep long - thirty minutes at most.

Eddie thinks about how much time you spend together in his trailer at this moment. You’ve shared everything. Clothes. Towels. Blankets. Toothpaste. Food. Secrets. You've made a mark on him when he wasn’t looking. If there is a way to tattoo someone into their brain, into their heart, you're there.

That terrifies him.

“Hi,” your voice melts him.

Eddie stumbles over his words. “Erm-,”

“I’m sorry,” you blurt. “I just-,”

“How are you doing?” Eddie wants you to keep talking. He’ll ask about anything to keep you here with him. Tempting you like a rabbit, and him holding onto a carrot, he waits for you to bite.

“Good,” you reply. “You?”

“Yeah, good.”

You can’t hold back. “You’re with Roxie, now?”

“Hm?” He hums. “It’s casual.”

“Casual,” you repeat. “Like I said- erm- I’m sorry that I haven’t been around. My classes-,”

“Don’t lie to me,” Eddie’s eyes swell, and you fall deeper into the trap. “What’s happening to you?”

Okay, truth time.

“I liked a boy, and he didn’t like me back,” you stretch out your top. “I even tried changing my look, but that seems pretty pointless now. But, I guess I just got tired of being compared to a boy.”

Eddie could faint. You're infatuated with someone so much that you changed your entire wardrobe. Guilt rubs at him.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, Eddie's denying what he already knows about himself. That if he kept comparing you to one of his guy friends that certain emotions couldn't grasp hold of the surface for air.

“Who's comparing you to a boy?”

He had to be sure.

“Seriously?” you frown. “Everyone. You. Gareth-,”

Confirmed.

“Is this about Gareth?” Eddie clenches his fist around the back of his chair. “I swear to God, I’ll pummel that little sack of shit.”

“Eddie,” you scold. “It’s not Gareth- never mind.”

“Wait, who’s the guy?”

You hum. “What?”

“You said you liked some guy?” Eddie pieces together. “It has to be one of us, right? I mean you stopped talking to all of us specifically, so which one of us is it?”

“That’s not important,” you suck in a breath. “Eddie, I’m doing homework.”

He snorts, the flips the page so he can read the question, “you’re doing it wrong.”

You roll your eyes. “Aren’t I usually the one who’s correcting you?”

“Gareth’s girlfriend has been helping me since you- never mind,” Eddie sees the tension in your jaw. “Okay, so to solve for E, you plug in this number here and then you take the square root there.”

You’re irritated, but Eddie is right and you mark your paper up how the equation should be.

“Thank you.”

“So, it’s Gareth,” Eddie presses on.

“What?”

“The boy you like that doesn’t like you back?”

“No,” you write another math equation out on your piece of paper. “Actually, Gareth liked me, and I didn’t feel the same.”

Eddie knows this, but he just needs to hear you say you don't like his friend.

“The plot thickens,” he gets comfortable. “Is it Jeff? Come on, Jeff is a catch.”

“Eddie, please drop it,” you beg.

Eddie throws a few more names out that you can ignore over your homework. But, slowly he begins to run out of ideas. You know where he’s going, and you’re not sure how to react when he says,

“It’s not me is it?”

Your pencil stops scribbling, and if you’re careful you can pretend to be thinking really hard about - what two plus two equals. Oh, damn.

“It is me.”

Those three little words trip you up more than Eddie’s jaw being on the floor right now. You stammer for a little too long. Tripping over the right words to say to him.

This is it.

The moment you’ll lose him for good.

You want him to just tear your heart from your chest and squeeze it until it pops. Make the pain of an aching heart go by so much faster.

“Mr. Munson,” Mr. Clark rose like a zombie from the afterlife. “Is there a reason that your seat is empty?”

Eddie whirled around. Still stunned, he replies,

“Uh. . . right, sorry.”

Without making too much noise, Eddie puts himself back into his original seat towards the front of the classroom. Fidgeting with his pencil, someone might mistake that he’s doing homework for the first time.

Eddie lives across the trailer park from you. How could he not see this coming? All the nights he's spent rescuing you from the clutches of your mom, who, despite being a wonderful host, has this unnecessary plea that you embrace your ‘femininity.’ That’s what you call it, he thinks.

Oh, and now to let you down.

Eddie’s seeing someone great. Roxie. She’s - she’s - she’s not as much of a slut as people say. And, he likes - no he loves that thing she does with her tongue.

Okay, he’s getting distracted.

You’re one of his closest and longest friendships he’s had. And now, you, have to go and change that.

Eddie’s mad. Angrier than angry. How dare you bring this to him.

Two months you kept away. You ran around the school like a chicken with your head cut off trying to avoid all of your loyal friends. And, you brought Robin into this mess?

Robin, at the very least, is a sweet and a neutral party. Okay? She doesn’t involve herself with anyone’s drama. She just sticks to the side of the drama like she's riding in a sidecar, and she takes notes. She lingers.

Eddie rubs his eye.

Maybe if you and he went on one tiny - the tiniest - date. As in, he doesn’t pay for food, kind of dates then you’ll get whatever you want out. You can go back to being friends, and Eddie can still see Roxie. Because, he likes Roxie.

He doesn’t like you like that.

Eddie wants nothing more than to forget the conversation you two just had. Yet, you’re lodged in his brain like a damn tumor. Yeah, a tumor. Growing at an alarming rate, he wants to smush your pretty little face. Not in a violent way - no, he’s not like that. He just wants to get out the tension, and - and hold you for a night? Does that make sense?

No, Eddie it does not.

Eddie wishes you didn’t smell so good today . . . and all the other days. If you smelled like an ogre, he could stop thinking about taking you on that ‘barely-call-it-a-date’ date. Although, if you were an ogre and you did smell as good as you do right now - ugh, that doesn't matter!

None of this matters. Why is he thinking like this?

In theory, he’ll take you somewhere romantic. To release you of your crush faster, he’ll spend the money - okay? He decides to break the bank for you.

Only once.

There’s a little spot outside of town that has the most delicious steak dinners. They have a dimly lit dining room, so Eddie wouldn’t have to see the dress you spent hours deciding on wearing. Your bare skin softened by the scented lotion you bought just for the night. He can hear your laugh like a song he knows by memory. You tilt your head back, exposing the flesh of your neck.

After your dinner, that he pays for - not you, he’ll walk you down the street where he parked his van earlier. He’ll have cleaned out and scrubbed the seats until every stain kicks the bucket. Driving you home, he’ll feel that knot in his chest that he knows from watching cheesy romantic comedy movies as practice for when that crap happens to him (he doesn't do that . . . shut up.). That knot tighten a little more by the time he gets to the trailer park. And, by the time he gets out of the car his fingertips start to shake.

Eddie will open your door, if he can get there before you. Taking your hand in his, he’ll feel the warmth of your skin against his. How right the moment feels. How nervous your breath is against his. How close you are to him. He’ll be the one to learn in first - you're too nervous to make that leap.

Lips as sweet as milk and honey. He would kiss you for a long time, always coming back for more. Eddie won't find himself getting enough of you. You’re touching his hair, and he melts.

Eddie will never want the night to end.

“Munson!”

Eddie doesn’t recall falling asleep. Yet, his eyes snap open. Mr. Clark’s slobbering from the side of his mouth. He’s so close that Eddie makes out the patches in his face where he’s forgotten to shave.

The classroom is emptying. He only catches a glimpse of you leaving.

“Go home, boy,” Mr. Clark begs. “You and I both know you don’t want to be here for any longer.”

No, Eddie does not.

In fact, Eddie would much rather be wrapped in your arms in either his bed or your bed.

Eddie shoves his notebook and his pencil back into his backpack knowing full well he heard something crunch unhappily in there. Racing out of the classroom, he sprints after you in the hallway.

But, you’ve already gone.

-> <-

tags: @hellfirenacht @queercodedcharacter @ogoc-19 @littlewinchester1 @stardustingold @ghost4love @spenciesprincess @animechick555 @foggyfooz @aactuaaltraash @loves0phelia

[personasintro]

Mutual Help | #44

↳ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬; in order for you to pretend to be his girlfriend, he helps you with your sexual desires ⏤ he calls it mutual help

⇢ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: jungkook x reader

⇢ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: fake dating au, fluff, angst, smut, slow burn

⇢ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: explicit language, mature content

⇢ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 20.9k+

⇠ 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯. | 𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐱 | 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 ⇢ 

"Hey, Mrs. Linn, thank you so much," you say while sending an appreciative smile towards the older lady, one of Jungkook's neighbors who probably used to see you more often than ever, as she holds the door for you when she sees your hands are full.

"Oh, don't thank me dear," she waves her hand before both of you make your way towards the elevator. "We all get our hands full sometimes."

Whenever you see her, you see interest and curiosity in her eyes, probably wondering why you are visiting Jungkook so often. It's not just her though. People talk and they get nosy, especially the older aged neighbors that have nothing adventurous going on throughout their day. Mrs. Linn is curious, but always sweet and never asks you about anything that could be considered as nosy or uncomfortable.

She knows you're visiting Jungkook, something you told her when she asked you if you're a new neighbor. Without too many details, you explained that your best friend lives here and you're just visiting him often. Ever since January, you've been coming here almost every day, depending on how you, Jimin and Taehyung take turns. It's March right now, so most of Jungkook's neighbors already recognize your faces, quickly classifying you as Jungkook's friends.

Mrs. Linn gets off the elevator first, living a few floors below Jungkook's floor, but she doesn't forget to send a nice greeting towards you once again as you return it, closing the elevator's door by pressing a button once she disappears behind the corner.

The walk towards Jungkook is always the same. The familiar hallway feels like a second home to you by now. A hope that things are better with him and a justified part of fear always walks you through your way towards his apartment. Pulling out the card and pressing the password of his home isn't as easy with your hands full of bags, but somehow you manage when the lock clicks and a little melody lets you know you've successfully opened the front door.

Setting down the bags on the floor, you take off your shoes and hang your leather jacket beside Jungkook's, taking the bags with you as you make it through his apartment. Surprisingly, Jungkook isn't slouched on his big couch while watching whatever he hasn't watched on Netflix yet. He is still in the living room though, barely giving you a glance as you pause and stare at him while he's lifting up the dumbbells.

Shirtless, while wearing his sport shorts he glances at you with an unbothered gaze, almost ignoring you as he keeps working out despite your presence there. Not that you expected anything more. He probably thought you're not coming here tonight.

You had to work overtime a little bit and then the wait for a take-out took half an hour. You're not an idiot. He's probably annoyed by the constant visits by either of you, Jimin or Taehyung. So far, he hasn't said anything and just went along with it. But none of you are stupid, you know he probably finds all of this ridiculous.

Ignoring him, you sigh and place the take-out on his coffee table, eyes not ignoring the two cans of beer that are probably empty.

"I brought us some chinese and sushi," you tell him, knowing he hears you even through the faint sounds of some TV show coming out of his television. "Come eat." Is what you tell him as you make your way towards the bathroom to wash your hands.

Surprisingly and luckily, Jungkook's dumbbells are laying on the floor behind his couch by the time you make it back. Your friend already sits on the couch and opens a few boxes of take-out while the delicious smell fills his living room. Plopping onto the space next to him, you glance at him to check up on him without saying a word.

His long black hair is falling onto his eyes a little, some of it sticking to his face because he's sweaty from his work-out. Still, you get to smell a faint scent of his cologne. Half-naked sitting next to you, tattoos on full display and a couple of more he got in addition to his pieces the last and this month, you're trying to focus on why you came here in the first place.

"Thanks for the food," he tells you as he opens the box and you notice he has brought cutlery for the both of you when you were in the bathroom.

"Of course," you smile, reaching for your food as your stomach grumbles, notifying you of the hanger you've been feeling ever since the diner time.

Jungkook turns up the volume a little, both of you focusing on the food and TV. As much as your curiosity and concern tells you to fully check on Jungkook, you keep your eyes off him knowing he's annoyed by the constant worried looks all of you give him. He's the first one to finish his food, cleaning after himself before he disappears in his bathroom. A minute later, you hear water running which makes you sigh as you grow already full, putting back down the leftovers.

It's been like these for two months now. Ever since the truth came out. The first weeks were the worst. Jungkook wouldn't talk to anyone, he wouldn't even eat properly which made you terribly concerned when you clearly saw he lost some weight.

Kiko has ruined him.

What hurts you is to see him going through this and there's nothing you can do to ease the pain and loss he's feeling. He wouldn't even talk to you which hurts the most. But this isn't about you.

At least he's slowly getting better, even though you're not sure if you could call it that. He's obviously going through a lot of pain and a heartbreak, and maybe he doesn't confide in any of you, but at least he tries to stay busy. He's working more than usual and if he isn't, he's probably stuck in a gym. There are always two options where he is at, if he's not home.

Pulling out your phone, you're not too surprised to see Jimin checking on you and Jungkook.

Jiminie: how is he? 

"As usual, nothing new tbh" You type back, sighing as you rub your forehead looking around.

Well, at least he keeps his apartment clean and doesn't forget to take care of himself as well. There were days when he would barely walk out of his room, pleading with you, Jimin and Taehyung to leave as he insisted on being alone. You didn't like that and if it weren't for Jimin's persuition, you'd never leave him alone.

Although, they didn't find out about Kiko and what she's been hiding this whole time right away. It took them a week to realize there's something going on, especially when Jungkook wouldn't pick up his phone and your conscience couldn't make out too many excuses why you can't hang out with them.

"Jimin and Tae are asking about you... I think you should at least text them, they're worried." You told Jungkook a day after he found out about Kiko. You refused to leave him alone in that state, especially when his kitchen looked like a tornado happened there.

Jungkook could barely stand on his feet, but still insisted on cleaning after himself so you wouldn't cut yourself on the shattered glass. You didn't listen to him though, and helped him, using his then current state so he wouldn't scold you.

He didn't tell you anything when you told him about your worried friends, that's until they got fed up with your lame excuses and Jungkook's lame of a text saying 'he's busy' and came to Jungkook's. When they saw you and the guilty yet sad look you gave them, their thoughts were proved right that there's something happening.

Jiminie: is he as annoyed as he was yesterday? 

Well, you didn't see him yesterday but you heard from Jimin that Jungkook wasn't in the mood of having one of you there again. You get that. But you also know Jungkook and he definitely doesn't want to be alone all the time. So whenever one of you can, you always make sure to hang out with Jungkook and silently let him know that he's not alone. He's been trying to push all of you away, but you're stubborn. He would do the same thing if the roles were reversed.

"he hasn't said anything but yeah, I think he is lol"

Even the 'lol' sounds sarcastic and painful, it makes you scoff at yourself.

Jiminie: he's softest around you out of us three

Jiminie: good luck with golden boy you'll need it

"wow thanks, what a support"

He sends you a laughing emoji back, causing you to snort at him before you toss your phone next to you, just as the bathroom door opens and Jungkook walks out of there wearing cotton shorts with a shirt covering his upper body. Hair wet from the shower, you can already smell the scent of his scented shower gel as he walks towards the couch and past you.

Noticing the dark circles underneath his eyes, your heart breaks at the sight but you force yourself to look away as you make yourself comfortable, staring at the TV even though you could care less about the show it's playing there.

"You know, you don't have to come here almost every day. I'm not a kid." Jungkook speaks up for the first time, and you almost cry out of happiness when you finally hear his voice. He doesn't sound broken, but he's not fine for sure.

You glance at him, chuckling at him as your eyes meet. Trying to keep yourself composed, ignoring how his dark circles basically scream for attention, you look away. "Tell that to Jimin and Taehyung too."

Your voice is light and humorous, acting as if your almost every day visit is just a casual thing. Both of you know why you're doing this and Jungkook sees right through you, although he doesn't call you out on it. It's pointless anyway.

"I already did," he murmurs, staring down at his hands that rest on his lap. "It's... I--you don't have to come here Y/N." he says, features twisted painfully when he says it as if the last thing he wants is to hurt you with his words. You know he doesn't mean it that way.

"I want to," you tell him immediately, seeing him looking away as he sighs. "Kook," you call out to him, seeing him looking at you again as you straighten yourself and scoot closer to him. "If you don't want me here, then tell me. I'll leave right away and I won't come back unless you call me."

You don't like this idea and you've tried to be there for him for sometime over two months now. You're not sure if your presence is helping in any way, but you also don't want to make him feel worse because you're too stubborn to let him deal with this on his own.

Throughout this heartbreak and loss that he's experiencing, Jungkook has never openly said he doesn't want you here. Sure, his behavior probably indicated he's somehow annoyed at your, Jimin's and Taehyung's not so oblivious attempts of trying to look after him through this stage of his current state. But he never explicitly said he doesn't want you here and that's why you keep coming and haven't left already. This is Jungkook you're talking about. You wouldn't leave him just like that.

But if it's something he truly wants and he'll feel better, then so be it.

"I--" Jungkook stops, shutting his eyes as he rubs them while resting his elbows on his knees. "I didn't mean to sound like an asshole. I--what I meant is, that you don't have to babysit me. Nor Jimin and Taehyung have too."

Sighing, you scoot closer to him before your hands make contact with his back, feeling how tense he is. One hand rubbing his back while the other caringly squeezes his shoulder, you shake your head. "We don't babysit you, I don't think you'd do something stupid. We're just worried, Kook. You've been through a lot. I know we can't make the pain go away, but we're here for you."

He stays silent for a moment and you see him nod before he groans. "But this is ridiculous. You guys don't have to come and check on me as if I'm not capable of living my life. You don't have to bring me food as if I'm not capable of doing that on my own. I--I'm sure you guys have other things to do, more important things to do in your evenings and days than checking on me as if I'm some kid."

"You're just acting like one sometimes," you tell him lightly, joking as you nudge your shoulder against his which makes him roll his eyes. Chuckling, you lean your head against his biceps. "You're not alone in this, Kook. If we didn't want to be here for you, we wouldn't come here at all."

You feel his shift, causing you to pull away slightly to get a glimpse at him. He's looking at you, face saying thousands of words and it pains you to see the sadness and pain that's still there. However, there is a glimpse of fondness in his eyes as he searches your face.

"I don't mean to sound ungrateful," he says softly, the corner of his lips lifting up slightly when you lean your head back against his biceps while staring up at him with big and curious eyes. "I'm--I'm gonna be fine. It just takes some time."

He doesn't sound convinced though.

"Of course you will," you tell him, cheek pressed against his arm. "Heartbreak isn't fatal." you remind him softly, knowing that one day he'll be able to look back onto this stage in his life and admire himself for being so strong.

"Then why do I feel like it is?" he asks quietly, your face twisting in a worry as you pull away, still holding him close to you.

"Have you considered talking to someone?" you ask, watching his brows scrunch into a frown as you lick your lips and open your mouth to explain yourself. "Like a therapist?"

As soon as those words leave your mouth, Jungkook rolls his eyes and tries to pull away from you but you hold him close and quickly continue.

"You're not just experiencing heartbreak, Kook. I'm really worried about you, there's nothing wrong with talking about this with someone professional." you tell him, voice more loud and clear.

"I got you." he says, causing you to nod.

"You got me," you confirm, "But you haven't been talking to me much, which is fine. And that's why I think, maybe it'd be a good--"

"No, I don't need a therapist." He quickly declines your idea which makes you sigh in disappointment but you're not trying to pressure him into something he doesn't want to. You just think it's a good idea if he spoke about his feelings openly, maybe get advice from a professional that can guide him to the right path.

You're no professional. Maybe whatever advice you'd come up with wouldn't help him. Maybe you'd advise him of something wrong. You don't want that.

"Okay, it's your decision. I'm not here trying to make you do something you don't want to." you remind him softly, squeezing his shoulder for the last time before you pull away but your eyes don't leave him.

You see the side of his face, him looking at his feet as he bites into the inside of his cheek. It's like he's trying to hold back whatever that wants to spill out and he embraces himself to open his mouth. You watch him with concern, ready to tell him that he doesn't have to say anything but before you can, he already speaks.

"Hoseok texted me today," he starts, closing his eyes briefly while you keep your mouth shut, letting him continue whenever he wants. "He's... coming here tomorrow to pick up her stuff."

He says, voice completely heartbroken as he mentions Kiko without actually saying her name and you know it pains him even more than you who's just looking at him.

"Have you talked to her?"

That makes him scoff and he shakes his head. "No, not since that day... I told her I never want to see her again, so she probably told Hoseok to come and pick her stuff." Yeah, that makes sense.

"Would you like to see her?" you ask carefully, watching his reaction as he stays frozen for a moment before he shakes his head.

"No, it's... I'm not sure if I'll ever be able to face her." he murmurs, rubbing his face again. You realize he's doing that to distract himself.

"Then it's a good thing Hoseok will come instead of her." you murmur, nibbling on your bottom lip.

Jungkook stays silent, sitting without barely moving before a scoff resounds from him. "I don't even know if I want to face him."

"Then tell him not to come. You don't owe him any explanation. If you're not ready, then just don't do it." you advise him, but he only shakes his head.

"No, I can't stand looking at her things scattered all over this apartment. It's better if he comes to get it..."

"Okay," you nod, reaching for his hair as you brush it off his face. "You want me to stay here tonight?"

He turns to you to look at you, "No, no... I'm sure you've other things to do."

You playfully roll your eyes at him, "I actually don't," you point out, "Tomorrow is Saturday, so I'd probably spend it alone anyway. I could be here when Hoseok comes? If that helps."

He frowns, probably ready to protest but you arch your brow at him, letting him know that it's totally fine and you'd like to stay anyway to make sure he's okay. So he sighs, nodding at you. "Alright, I... that would be fine."

Sending him an encouraging smile, you reach for the controller that's been sitting on the coffee table. "You up for a game?"

He definitely doesn't look like he's in the mood for that, but you wiggle your brows at him. "I'll kick your ass this time."

Jungkook knows what you're trying to do, but eventually after looking at you he scoffs amusingly before he snatches the controller from your hands. "We'll see about that." he mutters, the competitive side of him kicking in as you can't help but grin at him while he's starting to set up the game.

After two months of barely getting any response from Jungkook, you finally see a glimpse of the old him and you just can't fight the grin off your face. Not even when he truly kicks your ass in every game and round you play. He's not rubbing it into your face like he usually would, or joking about it but when he cocks his brow at you, a look that says 'I told you', you couldn't be happier with the progress he has managed to make.

Sometime during the night, when all the lights are turned off and the only glimpse of natural light is the moon peeking from the blinds, you turn around on Jungkook's bed. The movement is careless and you momentarily forget that you're actually sharing a bed with him. Yes, after proposing that you sleep on his big couch, Jungkook completely refused your idea and told you to go to sleep in his room. He said he'll take the couch which didn't sit with you well, after five minutes of bickering you settled on sharing the bed.

It's not the first time you both are sharing a bed. It's not a big deal. Plus, you're both single. It has never been a big deal for you to share a bed.

When your arm slaps against the mattress on Jungkook's side, you already wait for him to wake up and scold you for taking up most of the space like what happened too many times. But you're met with an empty space beside you which makes you crack your eyes open, lifting your head while your rustled hair falls onto your face. Groaning, you push them away just to be met with Jungkook nowhere to be seen.

Looking around, it takes you a while to notice he's not in the room. You could easily go back to sleep, but something doesn't seem right about Jungkook not being here. Sure, he could've gone to the bathroom or something. But all you can think about is his dark circles, which is enough proof that he probably has trouble sleeping. Pulling the duvet off your body, you don't bother to put on the slippers as you open the door from his room. Your head slightly pounds from the lack of sleep but you ignore it, eyes scrunched when you spot a light coming from the kitchen.

It's a dim lightning, nothing too bright but enough for you to notice Jungkook standing with his back turned to you, facing the kitchen light that's under the cabinet that isn't as invasive as the normal lightning would be.

You approach him quietly, your feet paddling against the floor. "Can't sleep?"

He doesn't flinch or jump from your sudden presence, but he turns his head to you abruptly as if he was caught doing something. It's only then when you notice the bottle of whiskey in front of him and a glass settled right next to it. He looks at you guilty, looking away as if he didn't want you to see it.

Sighing, you lean against the counter with your lower back as you watch him. "Does it help?"

"Couldn't fall asleep," he murmurs, "It usually helps me to fall asleep faster,"

You bite back the scolding you would most likely give him in other scenarios. But he wouldn't be drinking in other scenarios to help him to fall asleep, would he?

"Go back to bed, I'll be there soon." he tells you, grabbing the glass before he pours the entire dark liquid that's been there into his mouth.

Watching his neck bop at the movement, he swallows it as he bites onto his lower lip. His tattooed hand goes to his hair, running through them before he grips the edge of the kitchen counter. He's not going to get rid of you that easily, plus you can't go back to sleep knowing he's here drinking and trying to fight with insomnia this way.

Jungkook gives you a look when you turn around, hoisting yourself up to the kitchen counter to sit on it as you give him a smile. "Pour me one too."

Frowning, he stares at you. "Don't be ridiculous. You don't drink this late."

"Neither you used to," you tell him softly, "Fine, then I'll take the bottle."

Before your hand can reach the bottle, Jungkook is already snatching it as he rolls his eyes at you and pours a small amount into the glass, sliding it towards you. "You take the glass, I'll take the bottle." he says defeatedly which makes you grin in success.

"Fine by me," you hum, tasting the alcohol as you cringe right away but swallow it anyway, ignoring Jungkook's raised and knowing look. "How long have you been up?" you ask, trying to make a conversation.

After the games you both played, you went to take a shower and take off the make-up to get ready for the bed. Jungkook has lent you one of his shirts and luckily found one of your pajama shorts you always kept here during your summer sleepovers. Once you were done, Jungkook was already in bed staring at the ceiling and once you had joined him, he turned off the lights and went to sleep. At least that's what you thought because by the time ten minutes had passed away, you had already fallen asleep.

Looking at the digital clock on his stove, you realize it's three in the morning. You've slept for four hours.

"I never fell asleep." he admits silently, ignoring your worried gaze as he drinks from the bottle.

"How long is this lasting?" you ask quietly, not wanting to sound as if you're scolding him. You're worried.

"Ever since that day," he answers, causing you to suck in breath as your heart cracks at the new information. This is even more serious than you've thought. You knew there's obviously something more going on with him, something you, Jimin or Taehyung know about. "But I don't drink every day, especially during the week when I've to work and drive the next day."

At least he's responsible, you think as you look away from him and sigh. "It breaks my heart to see you like this, Kook." you admit quietly, voice almost cracking as he glances at you, eyes filled with sadness and guilt.

"That's why I didn't want you to come here and see me like this." he says back but you only shake your head.

"Don't say that," you lick your lips, "I'd rather be here than wondering how you are doing."

"Isn't it obvious?" he scoffs, glancing at you as you sigh in defeat but silently agree with him. He doesn't sound angry at you, he's angry at the situation, at the pain he's feeling. It's like you can understand what he's going through, even though realistically you've no idea how much pain he's enduring.

Attention taken away by a movement, you watch Jungkook walking towards one of the cupboards as he pulls out something that rustles in his hold before he hands you the item. It's a pack of crackers, it makes you smile as you look up at him with a question in your eyes.

"So you won't feel sick from the whiskey," he explains, watching you grin at him as you open it, plopping a cracker into your mouth before you point towards your glass, silently telling him to pour you one more.

He looks skeptical but he does it either way which you thank him for. Offering him the pack of crackers, he shakes his head with a faint smile but it's very short-lived when it drops and he's back to his sadself.

Silently, you munch on the snack. This is the worst. You've no idea what to say. Distracting him is too obvious and something tells you he's not in the mood for that. Trying to make a conversation at three in the morning is... what would you even talk about? Even from your point of view, all you can focus on is the elephant in the room but it's Jungkook's call. You're not going to make him talk when he clearly doesn't want to.

So you sit on the kitchen counter while Jungkook stands beside you, taking a sip from the whiskey every now and then as you both are enveloped by the silence. After a few minutes, you place the pack of crackers down at the same time when Jungkook suddenly scoffs. He's been in his own world for the past few minutes, clearly thinking and almost forgetting about your presence.

"Isn't it funny?" he asks, tone dripping with sarcasm, hurt and sorrow. He swallows another shot before he continues. "I would be a dad by now,"

You don't think you've ever heard him like this. So empty, yet so broken and angry at the same time. His words make your chest clench, heart fully empathizing with the sadness from all of this. Jungkook would be an amazing dad, whether he'd be ready for it or not. He fully dedicates himself to everything, he always does things at hundred percent. No less.

"All those times," His voice cracks, eyes pinching together as he rubs them while you straighten yourself, staring at him with nothing but sympathy and worry.

However, you keep your mouth shut. It's very rare for Jungkook to be sharing something so personal with you these days and you don't want to ruin it by saying anything. So, you just let him talk and get it off his chest.

"You called me a dad as a joke," Your mouth falls open, eyes watering at the sight of Jungkook's broken glance he gives you. "We joked about that a lot. If only I knew--" He stops himself, visibly taking a deep and shaky breath to stop himself from crying.

Reaching for his arm, you grasp it and pull him towards you. Surprisingly, he doesn't protest but looks at you with a confusion written all over his broken face, until you can't see it anymore because your cheek is pressed against his chest. Cuddling up to him and wrapping your arms around his frame, you hug him tightly.

"I'm so sorry, Kook," you cry to his chest and you feel him tense, before he sighs and hugs you back. "I'm so sorry." you whisper, staining his shirt with your tears he undoubtedly starts to feel.

"It's not your fault..." he mumbles, leaning his cheek against the top of your head.

"I know, but it breaks my heart to see you going through this," you admit, sniffling as you feel him pull away. He meets your teary gaze, giving you a weak smile as he wipes off your tears. "You don't deserve this."

Dropping his hands, he doesn't protest because he knows that's true. It's not selfish of him to admit it. He has never done anything to hurt Kiko. He has always showered her with so much love and respect, and she broke his heart for the second time just like that. You've never seen her being hurt like that when she stormed out of Jungkook's apartment looking like a complete mess. She really is sorry but it's no excuse for what she has done to him. She has ruined him.

"I'm pathetic," Jungkook scoffs, shaking his head as he leans against the kitchen island, right on the opposite side of where you're sitting. "I'm so fucking pathetic,"

You tilt your head to the side, watching him rub his eyes for a moment and you want nothing more than to envelop him in a hug once again.

"I gave her a second chance, I trusted her. I made a fool out of myself, I fucking--I was forgiving her for cheating--a fucking cheating!" he exclaims, making you flinch but you stay glued to your spot, gripping the edge of the counter tightly. "I love--loved her so fucking much, I would give her the world!"

"Kook--"

"And she broke my heart like I never meant anything to her!"

It doesn't matter that it's the middle of the night and he could possibly wake up his neighbors. You're genuinely scared he's going to break all over again. Not because you're scared of him. You're scared for him.

"Would you rather live in a lie?" you ask softly, making him pause for a moment.

"What?" he breathes out.

"Would you rather think she cheated? Or believed she broke up with you because she needed space? I know it hurts, Kook," you say softly and carefully, "I might not fully understand the pain you're going through... but isn't it better that you know the truth? Even if it hurts..."

He knows you're right. She made a fool out of him, just like he said. Maybe not purposely, in a twisted way you understand why she did that, hid the truth from him. To spare him the pain she's been feeling and experiencing on her own, even though... Can their pain be compared? She had a choice, Jungkook hadn't.

"It hurts so much..." he whispers, and you swear you hear your heart cracking. Hopping off the counter, you go straight to hug him all over again.

"What can I do?" you murmur into his shirt, tightening your grip as his hands drop at your shoulders, squeezing them.

"Don't leave me?" he asks unsurely, feeling pathetic to be asking you that and mainly for sounding like a pathetic fool as well.

Giving him the softest smile, your lips slightly wobbling when you look into his big dark eyes. Grabbing one of his hands that's sitting on your shoulder, you squeeze it as you don't break eye contact.

"Never."

And that's enough of a confirmation Jungkook needs, sending you a weak smile for the first time in a long time. When you lead him to his bedroom after turning off the light, leaving the alcohol abandoned on the kitchen counter along with your glass, you both hide yourselves under the covers. You hold his hands, caressing his knuckles and the back of his hands, until your eyes flutter shut and your movements slow down. The last thing you feel is Jungkook doing the same for you, until his hands slow down and he allows himself to fall asleep.

Jungkook has always been an early bird. It's something you've admired about him, or more like have been jealous about. He'd wake up at six in the morning and by the time the clock hit eight, he'd had his breakfast and workout done amongst other things.

Things have changed though. It's not shocking to not see him sleeping next to you by the time you wake up. He might have used to wake up early to be productive, always wanted to do something and despite all of that, he calls himself lazy. But right now, you're not even sure if he even fell asleep to be able to wake up. Your own tiredness chased you down last night and as far as you can remember, it felt like he was still awake by the time your breathing slowed down and dreams awaited for you.

He's distracting himself, this time from the awaited visit from Hoseok that should be coming any minute. It's not hard to figure that out because by the time you clean up yourself in his bathroom and change your clothes, breakfast is already waiting for you with a cup of tea you like.

Jungkook's leaning against the kitchen counter with a spaced out expression and a cup of coffee in his hand, as he slowly brings it to his lips. He looks tired but from your quick checking in, he does look a little bit better.

"Have you slept?" you ask right away, eyeing the breakfast and not sitting down just yet, fully focusing on him to show your persistence. You wonder how many times Jungkook has called you annoying in his head, but it's not like you care that much. Not as long as he gets his sleep.

Brown dark eyes flickering to you, you swear you see the corner of his lips twitching at your straightforwardness, very well known straightforwardness, before he sets down his cup with a click against the marble.

"I have," Is all he says and you sigh, not wanting to pressure him into saying more. "I made you breakfast."

"Just for me?" you cock your brow, happy to see the slightest of his grin and roll of his eyes as you sit down.

"Us," he corrects himself, surprisingly joining you.

Your eyes dancing across his face to check on him from close doesn't go unnoticed by him and he does have a little twinkle of amusement in his eyes. Grinning, you set your eyes on a bowl of fruit with strawberries and raspberries in it. The little chuckle that escapes Jungkook's lips is unheard by you as you grab the spoon and dig in.

"You know, you should eat more in the mornings. You know what they say, it's the most important meal of the day," Jungkook comments, not surprised by your choice out of all the other options on the table.

"And so is sleep," you say with a full mouth, earning Jungkook's daring and raised brow as you swallow the food before continuing. "I'd say it's more important than breakfast."

Jungkook scoffs a little, looking at his empty plate as he serves himself scrambled eggs and bread. "I did sleep."

"You did?" You don't sound convinced, raising your brows with a doubtful look.

Jungkook hums, putting some food into his mouth as he chews on it while you stare at him, slowly eating the breakfast he has prepared for the two of you.

"You don't have to worry about me,"

Yes, you do. You do worry about him because so far, you've never seen him in this state. Barely sleeping, looking so lifeless yet he's keeping himself occupied by working overtime and working out a lot which shouldn't necessarily be the worst thing. It's hard to describe, you're not sure what's good and bad for him but all you know is that he's still deeply hurting and he's keeping it to himself. He's holding it in.

"I slept okay, really."

Is he telling the truth? He still looks tired but he probably got more sleep. He's on edge, knowing today is the day when Hoseok is coming and he could be here anytime. And since he's holding it in, it's hard to say if he's doing better than he was yesterday. You wouldn't say so. Facing Hoseok isn't probably the most pleasant thing to do considering he's been trying to distract himself from Kiko. And since Hoseok is close to her and a big reminder of what she has done, it's like experiencing that pain all over again.

But maybe when Jungkook confided in you more about his thoughts and feelings, it got at least some small amount of weight off his chest. At least you hope so.

"I'm glad, or else I won't ever leave so I can check on you if you're sleeping well." you joke, lips twitching as you look up at Jungkook to see him crack a tiny smile.

He doesn't say anything but the silence isn't awkward at all, both of you eating in silence with thoughts still running. You realize you're even more nervous about Hoseok's visit than you're letting on.

You're worried.

Worried about how Hoseok is feeling about all of this. Worried about how Jungkook is going to react.

So if you're feeling this way, you can't imagine how Jungkook must be feeling.

The moment the doorbell rings, it seems like everything has frozen for a moment. You both know who's about to come upstairs and knock on Jungkook's door any second. The cup of tea that Jungkook has made you is placed on the coffee table by your tensed hands and as you're about to turn to Jungkook, he acts quickly and buzzes Hoseok in. Once he gets back, his eyes avoid you for a moment before he looks at you sitting on his couch with big and uncertain eyes.

It's hard to detect what emotion crosses Jungkook's face. Panic, anxiety, discomfort.

Hoseok coming for Kiko's things that are still laying around his apartment – being the painful reminder of their heart crushing break-up – is still a better option than Kiko coming for them by herself.

Jungkook did say he doesn't want to see her anymore, at least she respects his decision. Although, you think she probably isn't ready to face him as well.

You wish you could hate her though. Yes, you're mad at her for breaking Jungkook's heart all over again. He's in this state because of her lies. But during those weeks ever since Jungkook told you what happened, you thought about it and her a lot. The decision she made hadn't been easy. It's hard to even think about it because nobody knows what was going on inside her head. It's easy to judge but you're not totally sure what she went through.

Yes, you don't think her decision was right – at least her decision to leave Jungkook out of it when he was a huge part of it as well. But it's not your place to judge her decision when it's not you and not your body. You can't possibly imagine what she went through, even though some of it is thanks to her. She did it to herself but still, you find some kind of empathy and you actually feel bad for her.

She should've definitely told Jungkook. He deserved to know and that's a fact. Even if she wasn't planning to start a family with him, or whatever the other reason could be, she should've told him and they could've at least talked about it. Would Jungkook be able to convince her? What would he tell her? It's something you and maybe even Jungkook himself doesn't know.

And as soft knocks can be heard coming from the front door, Jungkook looks like he's ten seconds from truly panicking and all you want is to give him a hug that would help and take away all the stress and pain he's feeling. However, you stand up and send a soft smile his way, offering to get the door which he gives you what looks like a form of thankful smile.

On the other side, as you open the front door but not before taking a deep breath, is standing Hoseok that doesn't look much better. He looks slightly surprised to see you there but it only takes a few seconds. The discomfort is evident on his face, even through the soft smile he sends your way as greeting leaves his mouth.

"Hey," you tell him softly, lifting your lips. "I just--I'm here because--he's not feeling very well." You don't owe any explanation to Hoseok but the words jump out of you before you can keep your mouth shut. Hushed and sad tone makes Hoseok look at you in sympathy.

"I'm sorry," he says sadly, coming inside as you close the door behind him.

Hoseok doesn't look like this is the place he wants to be right now and it's totally understandable if you look at things from his point of view. He knew, but you know he was just as having his best friend's back as you're having Jungkook's. The honesty in his voice isn't hard to miss and you just know he really is sorry about everything.

You're just not a person he should be saying that to.

Nodding, you give him a lipped smile and lead him to Jungkook when he takes off his jacket. Not that he needs you, he knows Jungkook's apartment too but you can see how careful he is with each step he makes, even though his steps are light and rhythmic.

What isn't rhythmic is probably Jungkook's heartbeat when he hears you coming, knowing you're not alone as he hears two sets of steps and the lingering tension with Hoseok's arrival.

Noticing Hoseok's hesitance once you turn to look at him but his eyes are already set on Jungkook, who's standing near the couch not even fully facing you. From the corner of his eyes, he can make out the two of you but doesn't even spare a glance in your direction. Well, Hoseok's.

Hoseok opens his mouth, ready to greet him and Jungkook probably doesn't catch that but the timing is adding even more tension to the whole situation when he speaks first.

"Her stuff is in the bathroom and my room."

You wince at the distant and hard tone he sets. You understand he's upset and you mostly feel sorry for him, but that doesn't mean you don't feel an ounce of pity towards Hoseok as well. He just stands there, features softening and regret written all over again on his face mixed with sadness and understatement.

"Jungkook, I'm--"

"You're what?" Jungkook snaps, this time fully turning towards the two of you looking straight at his friend in anger and betrayal. He doesn't give him a chance to respond because Jungkook is currently a ticking bomb. "Sorry? You knew the whole time and now you're sorry? Don't give me that bullshit," he scoffs, causing Hoseok to sigh as he bites into the inside of his cheek.

"How dare you to look me in the eyes and just be sorry?" The tone of his voice raises but the only thing you can detect is the hurt behind it.

"Jungkook," you mumble as Jungkook is met with your face full of pity and sadness, but he only glances your way before he looks back at Hoseok.

He definitely has more strength to be facing Jungkook because if it was you in his place, you'd be a crying mess if Jungkook looked and spoke to you that way. And you almost whimper when Hoseok makes his way over to Jungkook, not sure if that's a good idea judging by Jungkook's sharp glare.

"Yes, Jungkook, I'm sorry," he says calmly, "I know you're mad at me and you've every reason to be, I fucked up and I've regretted that every time I thought about you,"

He walks past him towards one of the doors of Jungkook's bathroom and bedroom, stopping and turning to him once again.

"But she didn't want you to know and I had to respect that as her friend."

"Don't give me that bullshit!" Jungkook yells, causing you to flinch because even though you know he's mad, you weren't expecting him to yell as soon as Hoseok finishes his sentence. "You're my friend too! You were joking with me this whole time, we hung out and you looked me in the eyes knowing she was pregnant with my baby! You fucking knew and never said one fucking word!"

Hoseok's breath trembles as he takes a breath but keeps being composed despite Jungkook's evident anger.

Jungkook takes a few steps towards Hoseok and you tense before you do the same. You're not part of this, this is between them but you don't want this to end up in a huge fight.

"When did you find out?" he asks slowly with a warning tone, causing Hoseok to look down in shame for a moment before he finds the courage to look him in the eyes again.

"Jung--"

"Stop Jungkook me, just answer. You can at least do that much."

You frown, not really liking the tense atmosphere that gets tense with each second and word Jungkook or Hoseok say.

"She told me when she asked me to accompany her, she was broken, Jungkook. There's nothing I could've done to change her op--"

Jungkook lashes at Hoseok, grabbing him by the collar of his hoodie and you yelp, rushing towards them.

But Hoseok keeps talking, wanting to give Jungkook his answer. "She begged me not to tell--"

For one moment, it feels like a flashback from the New Year's Eve party when Jungkook lashed at Haneul, throwing a great punch to his face. But then... this is a completely different moment and you see Jungkook's fist in the air, causing you to act quickly. Hoseok betrayed him but he stayed loyal to his best friend, you're not sure if punching him would solve anything. Maybe it would even make Jungkook feel worse knowing he punched his good friend, whether he hurt him or not. It's not really Hoseok's fault for not knowing about Kiko's pregnancy.

You know it's stupid but you also don't want him to do something stupid because of how he feels. And before Jungkook can deliver a good and hard punch to Hoseok's shocked face, you're standing between them yelling at Jungkook to stop. The last thing you see is Jungkook's big shocked eyes as you close your eyes in reflex, opening them and finding his arm in the air stopping at the right time.

One second you see his life flash in front of his eyes and the next he's frowning that slowly turns into anger. "What thefuck are you doing? I could've fucking hit you!"

He sounds panicked, genuinely angry that you'd throw yourself like that between them, risking the chance of getting hit by Jungkook. He would never be able to forgive himself for that if that happened. You're stupid for doing that, you realize your mistake but it's important he stopped and hasn't hit anyone. That's a win, right?

"Jungkook stop, just let him get her things..." you plead with him, features softening as Jungkook drops his arm but rubs his eyes.

Taking his hands, you give them a good squeeze and one look in his eyes. He's glancing between your eyes, shifting his gaze quickly before he sighs. With one movement he turns around and starts walking to the couch where he sits, elbows already leaning against his knees as he grabs the back of his head.

The view pains you and glancing at Hoseok, he watches Jungkook with the same look before he looks at you.

"That was stupid, you know? You could've gotten punched." he says softly, silent 'thank you' lingering in his brown soft eyes.

"We all do stupid things, don't we?" you shrug, lightly chuckling as he tries to imitate a form of smile that comes out sad, the last thing he does before walking to Jungkook's bathroom.

Jungkook must've collected all Kiko's things when he was going back and forth between his room and bathroom, leaving you sipping on the tea while trying to distract yourself by watching some movie on his Netflix account. That's probably what he was doing when you heard clicking and rummaging because Hoseok comes out of the bathroom in a minute, holding a cosmetic bag with a few things in his hands too.

He does the same thing in the bathroom, coming out with a bigger shopping bag that Jungkook usually takes with him while doing a bigger grocery shopping. It must've taken a lot for Jungkook to search for her things and put them in one place for her.

Accompanying Hoseok to the front door, he looks disappointed and sad from not being able to say goodbye to Jungkook because he still holds his head in his hands, clearly not wanting to talk. It was painful to watch Hoseok open his mouth and then close it when he saw Jungkook in the same position.

"She has been going to therapy ever since she..." Hoseok reveals and trails off quietly, causing Jungkook to scoff.

"Is that my fault?" he asks bitterly. He's going to need one thanks to her too, he thinks.

Hoseok glances at you, giving you a saddened look once again as he shakes his head. "No, it's not... I'm just telling you that she's been suffering too, even though she is the one who made a decision."

Jungkook doesn't move, not sparing him a glance which Hoseok takes as his cue.

As Hoseok bids you a soft and quiet goodbye, you do the same thing and release breath as soon as the door clicks closed. Walking to Jungkook, you join him on the couch and put an arm over his shoulders while your head leans against his.

"Is he gone?"

"Yeah," you sigh, "He's gone."

You don't tell Jungkook it wouldn't be smart to hit Hoseok, as much as he thinks he deserves it. You don't even tell him how sorry you are because he knows and there's no need to say that. So you stay quiet, leaning back with him until you both fall asleep in one of the most uncomfortable positions and wake up with cranked necks and throbbing neck and shoulders pain.

You don't go to clubs often.

Scratch that. You try not to go to clubs often but with a friend like Taehyung, it's bound to visit them at least once in a while, usually when he drags you not really giving you a choice. The blasting music that's been invading your ears for the past hour is a perfect example of that.

However, you're not the one who's been dragged here involuntarily, although you've never wanted to come here in the first place. Not that you don't like this club, not at all. This has to be the club where you feel the most comfortable in and it definitely has to do something with you working here before. After all, it's been only a month since you stopped working here and finally saved up enough money for a better car. Something you hadn't failed to mention to Jungkook at one of your attempts of checking on him and barging inside his apartment. You had talked a lot during that time, tried to update him with the littlest thing that has happened in your life.

Speaking of Jungkook, he's been tonight's victim of Taehyung's doing but surprisingly, he agreed to a proposed dinner when the first message from Taehyung suggested it in the morning. You should've known he had something up his sleeve when he suggested club before you could even finish your meal. So you got separated, changed your clothes and then met up again.

And here you are.

Tracing your finger around the rim of your glass, your gaze falls upon your best friend standing at the bar, getting hit on again. Slim and tall blonde woman is standing next to him, flashing him with a pretty smile that you can't see but can probably imagine here and there. You've lost count of those women. This is maybe third? Not that it would matter anyway, you kind of feel bad for him though. He looks uninterested but still polite enough to not turn her down, since she's obviously still standing there and batting her eyelashes at him.

Poor Jungkook, all he went for is another round of drinks but he's been standing there for the past fifteen minutes talking to her. You can see he's still not feeling himself, even though he agreed to come here and you get an idea it has something to do with what happened yesterday with Hoseok.

"Don't even say it,"

You look at Taehyung who sits down next to you, flashing you with a boxy grin when your eyes flicker to the mark on his neck that he hasn't cared enough to cover. Yes, Mr. "I'm going to use the restroom", sure. Was it the redhead he danced or the small petite woman he chatted with at a bar? Or with Taehyung, it could've been someone completely different.

"This is a bad idea, that's what you're thinking right? It's written all over your face." Taehyung runs his finger in front of your face to prove your point as you roll your eyes at him.

"I'm not saying this is a bad idea," you point out, earning a glance from Taehyung with his brow raised. "I'm surprised Jungkook agreed to come here and I'm actually glad he finally hangs out with us outside of his apartment,"

All of that is true.

Taehyung always thinks whenever someone has their issues, the best thing to solve is to loosen up but you're not entirely sure if getting drunk is the right way to solve any of this.

Jungkook has been down, that's for sure but at least he starts to communicate more and he even laughs at Taehyung's and Jimin's attempts of trying to make him laugh, or even when they're not even trying but are just being themselves. He is better, but he's still that same broken person that experienced a massive pain of loss and heartbreak. That doesn't just go away, not even in months despite you can see a little bit of progress on his part. Who knows what Jungkook isn't sharing with any of you, no matter how many times he has assured you that he is fine. You all are worried about him, you all just have a different approach to it.

"We just don't know how he'll be if he gets drunk. Have you thought about that?"

Of course, Jungkook is an adult and you don't have to watch over him as if he is a kid. You know Jungkook used to drink alcohol to help himself to sleep, he told you he's not doing that anymore but is it really true?

Taehyung considers your words, thinking about them for a moment before he sighs and places his arm around your shoulders. "I don't know either," he admits, "But at least we will be here for him?" he asks in a thought which you nod but sigh nevertheless.

"That's not the point, Tae... purposely trying to bring him to a club and getting him drunk just sounds and seems stupid." You give him a look, knowing exactly how he ushered everyone to take a shot as soon as you stepped into the club.

And of course there's a high chance all of you will drink. You're in a freaking club! It's almost as if you're asking for alcohol if you decide to spend your Saturday in a club.

"Hey, now! I tried my best!" Taehyung exclaims, shining you with his boxy grin in his usual playful mode.

You're not quite sure if Taehyung truly understands what worries you but you decide to leave it be. Jungkook can do whatever he wants and as his friend, you're worried about him but there's not much you can do. He's definitely aware of what Jungkook is going through, but he also never experienced any heartbreak to begin with. Taehyung's way of thinking is different as well and maybe to a certain extent, he's right.

Jungkook is finally out of his apartment hanging out with you without any of you having to come to his apartment uninvited. That's progress. But is the club really the greatest place to bring him into? You're not sure about that.

"And who knows, maybe he'll meet someone else here today. Or just have fun with someone," Taehyung shrugs, while your eyes almost fall out of their sockets from how casually he says it.

Is he seriously hinting at what you're thinking?

"He just had his heart broken," you point out, meeting Taehyung's eyes. "Besides he's not the type to have one night stands."

That's true, all of you know it so the chance of that happening tonight is not big. And for a moment you seem to be a little bit shocked at that thought, worried Jungkook will turn into someone he's not because of what happened to him.

"Well, I didn't think he was the type to fuck his best friend and look at you!"

Mouth falling open, you shrug and punch Taehyung in the shoulder while he doesn't seem bothered at all at how blunt he is. He shrugs, grinning at you and before any of you can say something, your two other friends finally join you with new and fresh drinks. From Taehyung's comment, you automatically reach for your drink ignoring his smug face from the corner of your eyes.

"I had to save our Jungkookie," Jimin laughs, squeezing Jungkook's shoulder who's sitting on the opposite side of the table from you.

"Women just wouldn't leave him alone."

"Are we surprised? Look at him!"

Taehyung is right.

One look at Jungkook and you understand the attention he's getting from women, which isn't that much of a surprise because people turn after him all the time.

The funniest thing is that Jungkook has put almost zero effort into his outfit. Just a casual black button up and jeans can be considered as effortless, right? But still, he's pulling it off because everything he's wearing at the moment compliments his body proportions, showing his hard work at the gym and his fit body. His hair is parted in the middle, kind of the only way to style his hair since it's long. You've caught him pulling off a man-bun a few times, but he only wears it to get the hair out of his face which occasionally happens when he's at home, working or working out like he told you once you complimented his longer hair, scolding him when he told you he's thinking about getting it cut back to short since apparently, the long hair is nuisance.

Your own outfit is nothing too crazy and you haven't put that much effort into it either. Just one of your short sleeved tight dresses which you usually wear during summer times in the daylight. It's definitely not the sexiest and prettiest outfit you've worn when partying, but it hugs your body nicely and it's comfortable. That's all that matters. Your hair is in a tight ponytail, showing off your features and cheekbones even more with the casual makeup you had done for the day and the accessories that are your small round earrings and necklace sitting between your collarbones adds a little bit more effort to your already normal and nothing special outfit.

The night feels weird and the only people in the mood for partying are Taehyung and Jimin. And when the conversation finally averts in a different direction, leaving Jungkook alone and the attention he's getting, you relax and start to enjoy your never ending drinks.

Drunk Taehyung is stupid.

You've no idea what that man thought when he brought a foreign woman into your shared booth, playing a wingman to the poor Jungkook who had seemed clueless for the first minute. That has changed when Taehyung didn't forget to mention she's a photographer just like Jungkook, ushering her to sit next to him and show him her photos.

At first, you couldn't imagine her as a photographer. She is pretty though, obviously knows how to dress up and do her make-up. More on the petite side but her gift from God in the form of perky and bigger breasts are hard to miss. Brown eyes and a nice smile, she seemed a little bit shy at first but as soon as Jungkook noticed it (and maybe her discomfort as well since Taehyung wouldn't keep an eye off their interaction), she relaxed.

"This is not my attempt to get him to hook-up with someone," he tells you as Jungkook shows her his own photos, causing her to gush at his talent that you know very well.

All of you do.

You flick him off on his forehead when he gets too close, the alcohol causing you to cringe while he doesn't look mad and blinds you with a grin.

"I think it'd be good for him to meet someone and talk to someone, uh, new. Other than you, no offense."

"Thanks," you mutter through your glare, "Whatever that's supposed to mean."

You wish Jimin was here, he disappeared once again saying he has to use the restroom. How much has this man drunk? If he was here, he'd surely have your back and tell Taehyung his idea is stupid.

"It means," he points out with nose held high, "You're getting old, sweetheart,"

He is crazy.

You stare at him confusingly with brows furrowed so much that your eyebrows start to hurt.

"The two of you are a lost cause, so it's better Jungkook starts to meet new people, women or whatever he prefers. You know, dips his toes here and there."

"You mean dipping something else..." you mutter, ignoring Taehyung's laugh.

"True, true," he purses his lips, "But no, he can do whatever he wants. He doesn't have to dip anything in--"

"You're so wasted, man," you cut him off, rubbing your forehead. "I'm gonna get myself another drink because I can't stand your drunk ass at the moment."

"Oh, can you get me one too?"

"No, you've had enough. Maybe try bubblegum." You move past him, silently laughing at the loud gasp that can be heard even through the music.

Taehyung's loud voice is the last thing you hear coming from the booth as you make it to the bar.

"Rude!"

"She seemed nice," Jimin comments, scooting closer to Jungkook who looks confused for a while but that's very short lived when he notices Jimin's eyes flickering to Ester who's already disappearing in the crowd.

"How do you know? You weren't even here," Jungkook mutters loudly enough for him to hear, grabbing his drink and taking a long sip from it.

"Taehyung told me, I met him on my way here."

Of course, he did.

He left shortly after you but not before giving a very "subtle" wink to him, clearly hinting at Ester. Which reminds him he has no idea where you went because before he could ask Taehyung, he used the opportunity to leave him alone. He's not stupid, Taehyung is never subtle when it comes to everything. He's like an open book and Jungkook is very aware of Taehyung's doing.

He had to admit. It was nice to talk to someone that doesn't know what he's been through. There was no pity in her brown eyes when she was talking to him. She was nice, not hitting on him like Taehyung may have expected.

He's not sure if he's ever going to see her again, but he does follow her Instagram account. They followed each other as soon as they started discussing photography and all the things his friends don't really understand. You're usually interested, so you ask and Jungkook explains whatever you're interested in, but it's different to talk about it with someone who truly knows these things.

It felt new... and fresh.

"Where were you anyway?" he asks, arching a brow at Jimin and his frequent disappearance throughout the night.

His friend scans Jungkook's face for a moment, long enough to leave Jungkook wondering even more but then he just shrugs. "Just needed some air. I'm not feeling it tonight."

That is not something you usually hear Jimin to say when it comes to clubbing. Although, he's not as wild as Taehyung is and there were times when Jimin simply wasn't feeling it, just like he called it. Very rare times though.

"Any of us is," Jungkook says," Maybe except Taehyung."

"Yeah, I guess we all have our reasons," Jimin shrugs, "But I'm glad you're here, Kook. Maybe it's not fun as usual but it's nice to finally hang out with you."

Outside of his apartment with a grim atmosphere, he means.

"Yeah, I guess it was time for me to try and enjoy myself more. I can't handle Y/N looking at me as if I'm a kicked puppy she needs to constantly check on." he chuckles.

He doesn't mean it badly. He knows you're worried about him, just like you would be if that happened to any of them. He hoped that agreeing to come here tonight would ease your nerves but judging from the look of it, you're not really in the mood to be clubbing too. Which reminds him all over again where the hell did you go. It's not smart of you to go alone, even though you're inside. None of that matters when men are pigs inside or outside of the club.

On the other side, Jimin understands what Jungkook means and nods along with his words.

"Well, I think she needs to loosen up too. She's been having a hard time with the landlord after all, which is understandable..."

"Wait, what?"

You're having a hard time? Landlord? What the hell is Jimin talking about? This definitely sounds like news to him.

"You don't know?" Jimin looks even more shocked.

He'd think Jungkook was the first person you told to but clearly he's not.

"Her contract is ending in two months and apparently the owner's daughter is moving in there, so he wouldn't extend her contract. It happened unexpectedly and the landlord has been apologizing, at least he's feeling shitty about it but yeah, she's in a very fucked up situation right now."

Jungkook stares at his drink barely blinking as he lets the news sink in. He has so many questions but it seems that even though Jimin knows way more about it, he doesn't know any further details.

"What is she going to do?"

"I don't know, the last time I asked her she told me she'll have to look for another apartment."

"But she bought her own furniture there and she has lived there for two years—they can't do that to her."

Jimin's features soften, shrugging because he knows what Jungkook is feeling right now. Frustration, that's what he felt too when you told him the news, almost breaking in tears from the frustration, anger and sadness.

"I told her she can crash at my place but you know what she's like..."

Eyeing the barman's back, you wish he would just do your drink quickly before anyone tries to take their move on you, so you can join your friends. He must be new, you think. You've never seen him here.

You've spotted Mark once and minus the faint greeting you both had at the beginning of the night, you haven't seen him since then or talked to him.

Almost jumping at the body brushing against your shoulder as someone sits next to you, you're instantly met with a set of dark brown eyes you've grown familiar with over the years. Well, you've to admit you feel happy to see him here and him bringing a feeling of safety with him.

"You've a trouble with your landlord?"

You're speechless for a second, shaking yourself off from the momentary surprise by letting out a sigh. "Who told you?" you ask, glancing away at the barman before you look back at him. "Jimin or Tae?"

"They both know?" Jungkook sounds surprised, noticing the look of guilt on your face. It's okay, he's not mad at you or something. He's just surprised you haven't told him about your trouble, despite you've been filling him in with every possible detail of your life for the past two months.

It just feels weird that you suddenly left such important information. Something you told Jimin and Taehyung but not to him.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asks softly, leaning his elbows against the bar but he keeps his eyes on you.

"I didn't want to worry you..." you answer, "It's not like I didn't want to tell you, but you've been dealing with your own shit and I guess--it's not even that important."

"Like hell it's not," Jungkook exclaims, "It is important. Just because I'm dealing with my own shit doesn't mean I can't deal with yours too,"

That makes both of you laugh a little but you shake your head, not really knowing how to justify your decision of not telling him other than what you've just told him. You'd tell him eventually. You've been searching for a new car as well, something Jungkook told you he's going to help you with but that was way before the biggest bomb dropped on him and had a massive impact on him.

"What are you going to do?"

You're not sure if this is the greatest topic to talk about while On The Floor by Jennifer Lopez is playing, but you've no problem talking about this with Jungkook.

"I've started to look for different apartments, something where I can move in quickly since my contract is ending in two months, actually, shorter than that... I found this nice apartment, it's not as nice as the one I have but it'll do. I have to live somewhere, the rent is a little bit cheaper but I can definitely see why."

The photos on the internet you found doesn't look very good but it seems like a decent place to live in. Maybe until you'll figure out something different. The apartment you live in at the moment has a great location, it had been definitely a bargain when you found it and had been able to move in.

However, there are far worse looking apartments and this one isn't even that bad. It's just that you got used to the one you live in right now and it'll be tough to say goodbye to it. You wish you could be mad at the owner, which you were for the first two weeks, but you also understand that he followed the contract and basically has done nothing wrong.

He has a daughter and she's going to use that apartment, maybe she needs it and like a father, he's helping her.

"Is it that bad?"

"It's not," you wave your hand, "Just not as nice as my current apartment. Plus, it's in Dobong."

"Dobong?" Jungkook's eyes widened, "But that's almost on the other side where you live now."

You chuckle at his reaction because yes, you're very aware. "I know..."

"Y/N, that's so far away from here. What about your work?"

"I'd have to travel? Or maybe they can move me somewhere closer? I don't know, Jungkook." you murmur, growing frustrated all over again at the thought because you clearly haven't figured it out yet.

Jungkook's questions are just reality, reminding you that you don't have much time before you have to make a decision. Not that you've much of a choice.

"But you're gonna be away from us... from me... from Tae and Jimin."

When he says it like that, simply pointing it out but with saddened eyes, you feel like crying because the thought of being away from your friends and all alone scares you more than you'd like to admit. Over the years, you've grown independent, more than you ever were and you're proud of yourself because of that. But not having them close like you're having them right now (and even now, you don't exactly live super close but the distance isn't that huge) makes you want to cry out from the frustration.

"Don't say it like that," you whisper, looking at your lap. "I don't really have a choice. Other apartments are expensive as fuck, I can't afford it Kook. The prices went high and they go high every year. It's hard to find a good and affordable apartment in Seoul."

Jungkook turns to you on the bar stool, hooking a finger under your chin making you look at you. "We'll think of something, okay? You're not leaving me."

You chuckle at his bunny grin and wiggling brows, suddenly pouting causing Jungkook to grab you by your shoulders as he brings you closer to him, giving you the hug you desperately need.

He smells so nice. You take a whiff, cheeks pressed against his shoulder and enjoy a few seconds before you've to pull apart because the barman finally brings you your drink.

"Let's not think about it for tonight, yeah?" he proposes, "Let's enjoy this night. No bad thoughts. No Kiko,"

Your eyes shoot up to his at the mention of her but Jungkook just offers you a grin. "No apartment problem. Just us having fun, okay?"

"Sounds good," you tell him, taking a sip from your drink. "Where's your new friend, by the way?"

"Who?" Jungkook looks confused, a realization hitting him right after. "Ah, you mean Ester. Our paths have divided."

"She was pretty." you comment, watching Jungkook's reaction as he stares at you quietly.

"Are you on it with Taehyung?" He eyes you suspiciously.

"What? No!" you exclaim, refuting his assumption right away. "I told him it's a stupid idea."

"It is," Jungkook hums, grabbing your drink and taking a sip from it, frowning for a moment as he nods at the sweet taste. "If I wanted to hook-up with some woman, I could easily do that on my own. I don't need Taehyung's help."

Laughing, you nod. "Yeah, you probably could."

"Probably?" Jungkook scoffs playfully, causing you to giggle. "All Taehyung can think about is sex, he thinks that solves everything."

"Maybe not everything, but he definitely thinks it solves everything temporarily," you point out which Jungkook agrees with, "Besides, all men think about is sex all the time."

"Hm, I can see your point," Jungkook purses his lips, "But sometimes it's hard not to think about sex when there's a beautiful woman."

You look up at him from your drink, finding him staring at you causing you to almost choke on the liquid as you clear your throat, putting down the glass as you arch your brow at him shamelessly. "Are you subtly flirting with me, Jeon?"

"Do you want me to?"

Fuck, this man is shameless sometimes.

Do you want him to?

The butterflies coming alive in your stomach are most likely a good answer for that. But it's very dangerous, no matter how exciting and good it feels.

But then Jungkook bursts out laughing, scrunching his nose at your face as you slap his shoulder, frowning annoyingly at your drink. "Dickhead."

"Hey now," Jungkook playfully frowns, "Come on, finish your drink and let's dance."

You're not sure if any physical contact with Jungkook is a good idea right now, especially when you feel your heart picking up its pace and the sight of Jungkook brushing fingers through his hair isn't helping at all.

"Why?" Trying to find a way to get yourself out of this, even though the thought of dancing with Jungkook is tempting and it's been a while since you had fun with him in a form of dance. "Why don't you go find Erica and dance with her? I'll sit here and cheer you on!"

You propose lightly and innocently, although devilish glint in your eyes as you look up at him, lips wrapped around the rim of your glass causing Jungkook to frown.

"Her name is Ester," And you want to roll your eyes, and what? "And I'd much rather dance with you."

Fucking Jungkook and his mouth for letting such words come out. His honesty, no matter how it sounds when you think about what he just said now, your head spins. You're not drunk, the drinks you've been drinking are low percentage alcohol but you feel slightly relaxed from it. And it's dangerous because your mind already wanders into places it shouldn't have.

So you do what you know the best and you start whining, masking your panicked heartbeat and mind. "I'll look like an idiot next to you!" And you mean it in more ways than just one.

First of all, you're not drunk enough to feel confident to dance with him. It's not just silly dancing you do at home or more private parties. The clubs are big and there are drunk people everywhere and you doubt everyone will have their eyes on you, but still. Jungkook is already like a magnet for eyes.

"That's not true," Jungkook disagrees, grabbing your wrist gently as he shakes it a little. "Just one dance, then. Please."

And he pouts, widening his eyes just like he knows – in that innocent and cute way that makes you shut your eyes as you let out a loud groan, knowing you've lost. "Okay, but I'm gonna finish my drink and you're going to have one too."

He sits back like an obedient student, flashing you with a bunny grin.

"Deal."

Jungkook's convincing skills are good, just not as good as yours. Finishing your drink meant two more and Jungkook's one drink turned into three, all thanks to your pleading eyes and shameless begging and Jungkook's soft spot for you.

"You're trying to get out of this, you still owe me one dance." Jungkook has told you when the barman placed the second round for the two of you.

"The night is still young, Jeon, relax." you've told him in return, sending him a grin with your glass in the air in a silent and yet another cheers.

You've to admit, as much as dancing with Jungkook sounds exciting, talking to him like nothing bad is happening in your lives feels refreshing and you wish the reality wouldn't get to you tomorrow morning. Or ever.

But it seems some things get to you sooner or later.

It's the time when your bladder lets you know you've to really use the restroom, no matter how much fun you're having with Jungkook and mindlessly planning your friend's summer vacation. Jungkook laughs when you excuse yourself, admitting you're ten seconds from peeing yourself and he turns around in his chair towards the dance floor, having a perfect view of the restroom in case somebody would bother you.

The gesture is sweet and you can't hide the little grin on your lips when your eyes meet, before you really usher to the restroom. Once you're done, bladder empty and hands cold from the water, you're completely thrown off when someone calls your name just a few meters away from you.

Voice you haven't heard in months but remember perfectly despite your short relationship.

Haneul walking towards you with soft eyes makes your heart skip a beat, but not in the good and exciting way but quite the opposite. You're too shocked to see him right here, in front of you looking just like you remember him because there's barely a change in his appearance. He looks good, very similar to what he looked like when you first met him. Black leather jacket, jeans and some shirt under his jacket, it's like some weird deja vu happening right now and you've to blink a few times to convince yourself he's real.

"Hi," he says as he stops, offering you a hesitant smile which you don't return because you're too busy staring at him as your brows slowly scrunch into frown. "I just spotted you and wanted to say hi. Don't worry, I've no bad intentions."

He better not because you're not scared to deal with him. But one look at him and his soft features, you start to feel guilty for being in a slightly panicked and careful mode. It's not like you've a reason to be scared of him. You broke up and even though the memory of your last conversation still slightly hurts, you've no hatred feelings towards him. You wish him well and you really think he's not a bad person.

"Well... hi, then." you mutter, mentally slapping yourself. It's more than clear you've no idea how to react to him and to Haneul, you look weirded out by his sudden approach to you.

"I don't want you to think I stalk you..." he says, glancing at his feet in embarrassment.

"Why did you come to the club I worked at?" Hence the past tense that doesn't go missed by Haneul and you see surprise and curiosity cross his features but he doesn't have the guts to ask.

"My friends wanted to come here. Listen, I can leave if I make you uncomfortable." he says simply, offering you a shrug that means he won't be mad if you tell him you don't want him here.

Which is stupid because he's free to visit whatever places he wants to. Your break-up wasn't that bad to the point you couldn't be able to be with him in the same room. It is weird he's here, knowing you met here and you still worked here just a month ago. There is a high chance he knew you could be here and if he really wanted to avoid seeing you, he wouldn't come here whether his friends wanted him to or not.

But that's kind of selfish and you're overthinking things once again. Maybe it's not that dramatic.

"No, stay," you tell him, "I'm just surprised to see you again..."

It's polite to ask how he is but you're not sure if you want to have a friendly conversation with him. You've come to the terms that it's best not to keep him in your life and even a simple conversation is not necessary in your opinion. You moved on and you hope he did as well.

"Okay," he murmurs, "I--enjoy your night."

And with that, he turns around and leaves. You watch him long enough to see his friends in the background as he joins them, but before you can watch any further or any possible stares his friends could give you, you're already walking to the bar.

Jungkook is still there, not noticing you right away as his eyes stay attached to the dance floor while his fingers drum against the bar stool to the catchy music. "Oh, you're here!" he exclaims, briefly lisping from how quickly he says it.

He doesn't give you any time to react, already standing up as he leads you to the dance floor, tossing you a handsome grin over his shoulders. Realizing you've no chance, you deduce you feel tipsy enough to allow yourself to loosen up, even with Jungkook's close proximity and hands on your hips and yours on his biceps.

++

Jungkook's one dance never ends with one dance and when Jungkook wants to dance, he has to be in a good mood which you think is an amazing change. The alcohol flows freely in your body, the last three drinks you recordly gulp down causing everything to feel numb.

Everything besides Jungkook's hands.

You like the feeling of freedom the alcohol brings you. Overthinking is left somewhere else, letting you enjoy every second and touch of this. What in your more sober state you wouldn't appreciate about it though, is the lack of control you're having over your own thoughts and needs.

It's a hard task to stay unaffected and you're failing miserably, feeling your insides tingle with excitement that you thought is long gone but it's proved only Jungkook can make it come to life. You're both still tipsy which is good because it means none of you is drunk. Tipsy enough to want to get even closer to Jungkook which is freaking stupid, because he's already close enough as it is.

Your back pressed against his chest, ass brushing against his crotch and the zip of his jeans doing the same thing here and there seems like a big deal. You're selfish, because instead of putting some distance between your dancing and slowly getting sweaty bodies, your arm stays outstretched behind you, hand holding the back of his head and fingers buried in those dark locks of his. The other arm is holding the one of his hands that's on your hip.

Jungkook's warm breath hitting the crook of your neck causing you to shudder – shudder out of excitement and Jungkook himself.

You know you've lost. It's too late to end this – at least that's what you tell yourself because you don't want to end this. You wish he'd just lean down and press those lips onto your neck like he knows you love. You wish you could feel his hard dick and it's embarrassing how wet it feels between your thighs, even though his bulge is nowhere in its full hard-on state.

God, you're fucked. And tipsy. And horny.

And fucking stupid because when you shamelessly grind your ass against Jungkook, there's no chance it looks like an accident. If you could turn around and look at him, you'd see him biting his lower lip.

His hands squeeze your hips, almost the same way they did when he was balls deep inside you. Fuck, you forgot how that feels and you're ashamed to be even thinking this. It's not right. He's going through a break-up, no matter how many weeks have passed and you're best friends. The deal ended a long time ago, so what the fuck are you doing?

Jungkook's lips brush against your jaw, nose nudging it right after as you whimper, thankfully the sound gets masked by the loud music and bass that vibrate through your body. Everything is hazy, just not Jungkook.

"Are you trying to make me hard?" he asks lowly, almost amusingly and he sounds so hot that you've a urge to turn around and kiss him, just because he's close and you're fucking horny thanks to him.

Get a grip, Y/N, don't do a fucking mistake just because you're tipsy and haven't had sex since December. You went without sex longer than this, so why the fuck are you getting so desperate?

"Is it working?" you ask breathlessly, loudly for him to hear and you want to mentally slap yourself, but the temptation and excitement are holding the upper hand here.

"I'm trying not to get hard," Jungkook points out, the same low and deep tone as if he's telling you the deepest secret. "Don't start something you can't finish."

And that spurs you on even more, accepting the challenge as you turn around, staring right into Jungkook's dark and very much awake eyes. He has a lazy grin on his lips, living for the fire in your eyes and you're not sure if it's whether he's amused by all of this or if he's feeling it too.

"You out of people should know I never start something I can't finish,"

Hinting at something that hasn't been talked about for a very long time, because you both came to conclusion it haven't affected negatively your friendship and you're still the two best friends you've been, Jungkook's features darken and it's unbelievable you can see it even through the shitty club lightning.

Hands brushing against his chest, you slowly brush them down against his toned abs that you can feel through his button-up, causing you to bite off the gasp that wants to get out. He's definitely much buffer than the last time you got to properly touch him like this.

"Did you forget?"

There's the boost of confidence growing inside you, very much thanks to the alcohol and probably hormones that are making you do and say all these crazy things.

Jungkook chuckles, the corner of his lips lifting in a smirk as if he sees right through you. Can he see how much he tempts you? Is it just one of those times you're teasing each other but are very close to playing with fire? You're not sure, but you're enjoying the thrill his eyes bring to you as they stare at you, crinkling at the ends while his hand touches a few restless baby hair and strands that got messy and slipped from your ponytail.

"You out of all people should know I never forget,"

Breath hitching, it takes you a moment to release a giggle and you've no idea why you're suddenly giggling, maybe it's mostly the way he wiggles his brows – something he does frequently when he's just fooling around.

"Shut up," you tell him, making him laugh while you watch him throw his head back a little before he's looking at you with a wide grin. "I need to use the restroom."

"Again?" he asks teasingly, causing you to roll your eyes as you take a step back from him, letting your body calm down – at least trying for it.

"You," you tell him loudly, a grin spreading on your lips as you slowly back away. "Are dangerous, Jeon."

Turning around and silently giggling, you don't hear Jungkook's next words that are practically impossible for you to hear because he mutters it amusingly and the loud music definitely helps as well.

"So are you, Y/L/N..."

The reflection in the mirror you see as you wash your hands and finally look up to check your appearance is almost fascinating. Fascinating, because you almost don't recognize yourself – you look different. Face flushed, there's a thin coat of sweat layered on your skin and maybe it's the make-up slowly melting off, but what catches your attention the most are your wide sparkly eyes.

Jungkook still affects you and wishing you could be angry at him for it, your heart starts excitedly jumping instead at the memory of you on the dancefloor. You're not sure what the two of you are doing, if you're just fooling around and having fun or there are deeper undertones of your teasing and subtle flirting. Is it flirting? You and Jungkook would often fool around and tease each other which to some, it'd look like flirting. It's confusing and even you can't tell which one happened just a few minutes ago, but all you know is that it felt nice and exciting.

When two girls barge into the restroom giggling, drunkenly stumbling into one of the toilets, you shake yourself out of your daze and finish washing your hands in a hot water that almost burns your skin but you're too distracted to care. Messily drying them with a paper towel, you get out of there with a plan of joining Jungkook once again.

However, you're stopped by a body you bump into around the corner and the quick apology is once again on your lips, but you stop as you're met with a familiar pair of eyes. You realize there's a small percentage the whole bumping incident is a pure incident. Haenul's not surprised and apologetic eyes say it all, causing you to sigh.

"What do you want?"

You don't sound cold and rude, just exhausted. You're having a good time, after a long time, and you don't need to deal with any of this right now.

Haneul might've not planned to literally bump into you, but he has been waiting for you to get out of the restroom ever since he saw you coming there. You see his eyes slightly wide, the hint of alcohol tracing his soft features and even though he's hovering over you with his tall figure, he looks small but confident enough to face you.

"I just wanted to talk... Do you have a minute?" he asks, reaching for your arm as he gently grabs your forearm and tugs you away from the group of guys drunkenly joining the dancefloor.

Shaking his hand off, you frown, not letting yourself get soft by his attentive gesture of you not getting tossed around like a toy because of some drunk guys who don't care about anyone around them.

"Haneul, I thought we talked about this..." you sigh, telling him loud enough because you'd like to avoid repeating yourself.

"Please, just hear me out and I'll leave you alone, for real," he pleads with you, causing you to motion for him to continue.

Did he see you with Jungkook? You completely forgot about him being in this club. You're not sure if Jungkook or alcohol is to blame. Or maybe it's you, you probably should've been more considerate about Haneul still being here. But still, you're broken up and it's not like you've done anything wrong. You shouldn't feel guilty about this.

"I know I apologized before but I--I miss you so much,"

Wait, is this where he starts to beg you for a second chance?

Before you get to ask, he's already continuing.

"I can't believe I hurt you like that--I don't know why I'm telling you this, I don't know why I felt the need to talk to you again but I just saw you--"

He's drunk. Drunker than you thought he was.

He gets closer and you're stuck in your spot, unable to react properly as he strokes your cheek. All you can do is stare at him. Mentally screaming at yourself to react somehow, you're frozen while letting him touch you. He steps closer, hovering over you even more as his lips are close to your cheek to the point you can feel his warmth.

"We both have a reason to be mad at each other," he murmurs, "But I miss you so much... I wish I could kiss you, even if it's the last time."

The truth is that even though you're not physically or verbally reacting, you're having a whole inner mental battle going on. Do you want this? Do you want him to be this close to you? He's here talking about missing and kissing you, how do you feel about it? You're tipsy and horny, something that is because of Jungkook (the second part at least) and in your current state, you wonder what you even want. What do you even think about this?

Your thoughts are going slow and Haneul keeps talking, talking about how much he misses you and he really thinks he loves you despite the last words you told him when you broke up with him. Too much is going on you and you scream at yourself to wake the fuck up, especially when Haneul angles your head up towards him, eyes staring at your lips hungrily as he dives in for a mentioned kiss.

One second he's too close and your hand is up to stop him, to push his chest and tell him that he's drunk and not thinking straight. But someone beats you to it, although it's not as gentle as you'd do it because Haneul is yanked backwards that he almost stumbles and falls but someone grabs him again and pushes him to the wall.

Jungkook's eyes are filled with fire, not the kind you had minutes ago with him, but pure anger is in them as he grabs Haneul by his collar. Jungkook is quick, too quick for your liking and you've no idea what possessed him, but he's already lifting up his fist at Haneul who tries to pry Jungkook's hands off him but he's too strong.

Yanking the back of Jungkook's button-up, you yell his name. "What the hell, Jungkook?!"

"You think you can jump at her whenever you want, huh? Is that it? Who the fuck you think you are?!"

He holds his fist in the air but doesn't punch him, not yet.

Haneul is not making it any easier for himself though, looking at Jungkook with spite in his dark and drunk eyes. "Of course, you're here too." he mumbles choked up, thanks to Jungkook's harsh grip on his collar.

Oh, so he didn't see you with him.

"You're going to get us kicked out, Jungkook, let him go!" you snap at Jungkook, yanking his button-up again as you reach for his lift first and try to put it down with your full strength.

And he does. Not right away but once he looks at you and sees the fury in your eyes, he releases him but not before he scoffs at him. Jungkook saved the day once again, but the approach he chose is not very likable to you. There are people glancing your way, despite the bad lightning and loud music, the interaction has gained attention of some people and it's just a matter of time before one of the bouncers walks up to you and kicks you out.

"He wouldn't leave you alone!" Jungkook exclaims as if you're not realizing that Haneul was getting too close to you without you giving him consent.

And that's true, you realize that you don't want to kiss Haneul. You don't want to be close to him and you wonder if you would be stupid enough to let him do that because you're horny and slightly tipsy, which you're not sure if it's true anymore because this whole interaction has pretty much sobered you up.

"So you will start punching everyone?!" you exclaim.

Jungkook looks stunned for a second, as if he can't believe you just indirectly pointed at what happened with Hoseok the other day. And then he shakes himself out of it, sighing when he realizes that you're right.

He's never been aggressive. And he has a few slip-ups (three to be exact) but that doesn't define him. One was quite understandable. Haneul, the very person who's still leaning against the wall with a glare sending Jungkook, who slut-shamed you, got punched by Jungkook. Two, was Jungkook almost punching Hoseok because his friend kept his unborn baby a secret and betrayed him in ways he never expected. And now.

Almost punching Haneul again because he threw himself at you, in hope you would probably make-out with him and maybe leave this club together.

However, you don't understand why Jungkook has suddenly gotten so physical over something that could've been dealt with more silently and less violent.

"I'm sorry," he mumbles, taking a step back but doesn't leave your side as Haneul eyes him and then his eyes flicker to yours but all you can do is glare at him, reminding you that he's still here.

"You're drunk," you tell him, "Come on..." you direct your words to Jungkook this time, reaching for his hand and he does look surprised at your touch, but lets you hold his hand as you lead him away.

Not sure where you're going, you realize you're outside once the cold air hits your face but you don't pay attention to that feeling, finally taking a deep breath while you let go of Jungkook's hand and walk a few meters away from the entrance and people coming in or out.

"I'm sorry," Jungkook says again, joining you in your little spot while he stays standing next to you while you lean your back against the brick wall. "I don't know why I wanted to punch him..."

"I think you know," you tell him silently, appreciating the sounds of cars passing by and muffled music that isn't as long as it was inside. "You're sensitive and letting your frustration get the best of you."

"I didn't want you to see me like that," he admits, sighing in disappointment at himself which makes you look at him, finding him staring at the cars while you're met with the side of his profile.

His eyes sparkle at the streetlights in the nighttime, making him look even more innocent despite his massive and tall figure. Once again, he looks kind of vulnerable. Not because he feels sad over Kiko or anything else, but simply because he seems to be sorry that you had to see that.

"I just saw him cornering you--"

"I should've react, I was in a shock and I'm glad you made it there before I could've made a mistake,"

Jungkook's eyebrows twist into frown at your confession. He thought you don't feel anything for Haneul and you're past that relationship, nothing else.

"I guess I was too distracted from--"

Me and you dancing, you think but keep your mouth shut as you give Jungkook a knowing look, which you're not sure if he understands because he simply watches you.

"We had fun and then he came--he was drunk, I don't think he'd ever approach me like that if he was sober. I bumped into him earlier and he was fine, just said hi and left me alone."

"Yeah, alcohol does wonders."

Yeah, it does. You chuckle at that.

Jungkook steps closer, stopping right in front of you as he's hovering a similar way Haneul was a few minutes ago. But the difference is that Jungkook's close proximity makes you feel safe, comfortable and excited at the same time. The familiar burn in your stomach comes alive again, the little remains of alcohol in your stomach making you feel drowsy again but you know the truth is somewhere else. You can't put it on alcohol when you barely feel it in your system.

"Are you okay?" he asks, leaning down to check your face closer as you keep your mouth shut, gulping as you stare into his dark orbs that look concerned.

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" you breathe out, nibbling onto your bottom lip, unaware of your self-conscious doing until Jungkook stares down at your lips. His eyes jump between your lips and eyes, checking you as you feel the sudden need to touch him.

The need to push some of his hair from his eyes, to have your fingers wrapped in them again like that time when you were dancing. Bodies close, hands on your hips and ass pressed against his groin area... fuck--

"Are you sure you're okay?" he asks, tilting his head innocently as you open your mouth to say something, but nothing comes out of your mouth. "Do you want to head home or go back inside?"

All you know is that you don't want to go home and be left alone. You realize you want to stay with Jungkook, preferably turn back time and be back on the dance floor with him close to you. Enjoy the last minutes, even without something you've been silently craving for all of a sudden. You've no idea what's wrong with you. Is this how super horny people feel? Is this how men think with their penises? Is this how women think with their vaginas?

"Do you want to go home?"

Jungkook chuckles and looks away for a moment amusingly, and maybe a little annoyed that you can't simply answer and ask him a question back instead.

"If you're going home, then I'm going home too." he answers simply, giving you an answer which makes you nod.

"One dance and then we can go? What do you say?" you ask, anticipation in your eyes as Jungkook simply nods and motions his head towards the entrance.

"Okay, let's go... it's cold out here anyway and we should find Jimin and Tae to tell them we're leaving soon."

You almost complain, knowing Taehyung would most likely hold you hostage, so the two of you can stay longer but you stop, knowing as long as you've Jungkook with you, he'll take care of it. And Taehyung.

Jungkook leads you straight towards the dancefloor, his hand finding yours as soon as you make it inside as he holds you close to him. Somewhere in the distance you see Taehyung making out with a woman, the sight not that unfamiliar and you see Jimin chatting up close to him with another woman. If you paid more attention, maybe you'd have noticed how Jimin and the woman stare at the pair next to them amusingly – which means the two women are friends. But all of that goes unnoticed as you get them out of your sight, Jungkook's back and tattooed hand holding yours being the main attraction for your eyes.

Not even a minute on the dancefloor and you naturally find your way back to yourselves, in a similar position like before. Ignoring the way the one part of you mentally chants that yes, you might've not turned back time but this is even better, because Jungkook's hands are all over you again and so are yours, wrapped in his hair like you wanted them meanwhile the other hand holds the nape of his neck. His mouth brushes against your cheek and you shiver, whimpering how good it feels but it's not good enough.

"Jungkook," you mutter into the air but it's almost impossible for him to hear you through the music, but once you turn your head slightly to look him in the eyes, you're met with the sight of his lips again.

You tilt your head back a little, finally seeing those dark orbs that watch you attentively, hands not leaving you. Shameless and fucking brave is what you are, but it's not like you can't really control yourself (at least it seems that way) because your eyes find their way to Jungkook's lips again. Wanting to cry out of frustration, you know your body longs for something else and your rushed breaths are one of the first indicators for it.

And then you grab the back of Jungkook's hand, inching his face even closer. You wait for him to pull away or at least give you a reaction that would say this is not what he wants. You would be fucking embarassed if that happened, but maybe it would be for the better.

However, he lets you and just stares at you, almost as if he's challenging you to take the first step. Does he want this too?

Does he feel the need to kiss you just like you do?

He probably feels something because he would pull away if he didn't, you try to think rationally.

Surprisingly, you take the first step and nudge his nose with your own, bodies stopping but not inching further away from each other. It's like a huge throwback once again, this time involving all the affectionate kisses and the thing you always did, almost hesitating before you finally kissed. You wonder if Jungkook remembers it, if he knows exactly what you wish for and if he's remembered of all of those times he has done it to you.

And finally (maybe unfortunately) your lips slightly touch but it's not a kiss, they just briefly brush against each other as if both of you are testing the waters, wondering where your bodies and secret temptation will take you.

Growing annoyed and frustrated, you're ready to groan because there's something holding you back and you hate that at the moment but as always, Jungkook saves the day and with a little bit of force forward, he lets his lips meet yours for the first time in a long time.

In a time you thought would never come because you were past all of that.

Maybe this is a stupid thrilling decision but you can't bring yourself to think about it, nor curse yourself for it because oh, Jungkook's lips feel amazing and you feel like whimpering or cry out of pure satisfaction. They're soft just as you remember, maybe even softer and suddenly, it feels like nothing has changed and you're back to last year's summer. Letting yourselves to be free, not thinking about consequences and just enjoying each other's presence.

It's hard to think about everything else when Jungkook's warm lips are on your own, and it's funny how the only thing you manage to do is to take another step and start moving your lips against his own, now truly kissing him. He kisses you right back, moaning when you tug his hair and his palm spreads against your stomach, holding you close against his toned and strong chest.

You don't even care, you probably look like one of those nasty couples that make out in public. This even tops all your wet dreams you've shamefully had about Jungkook. Because the difference is that this is real.

The first swipe of his tongue sends an electrifying jolt all over your body, your thighs pressing together as you try to relieve the tension between them. Kissing until you're gasping for oxygen, the weird smell of people and sweat filling your nose almost making you puke, you peck his lips one last time before you lick your bottom lip.

"Take me home, Jungkook."

He's surprised, you can see it the way his brows shoot up a little and uncertainty framing his eyes by your simple yet shocking request, but he gives you a nod which you mentally sigh in relief. Your request is simple, yet holds various meanings that maybe you're not even sure of.

On the way out, Jungkook orders for a cab through an app and informs you that he has sent a message to Jimin and Taehyung into the group, informing them that he's taking you home. Even that simple sentence makes butterflies shoot straight into your stomach and even though you're not promising yourself more than you can carry, you enjoy the feeling as long as it lasts. You're not sure what you're particularly excited about because the moment you and Jungkook get into that cab, you're not sure what happens next.

And the uncertainty makes you nervous, but Jungkook's hand in yours and the way he unconsciously holds it tight makes it all better.

By the time you're walking out of the club hand in hand, the cab is already waiting for you and as Jungkook holds the door of the cab for you, he shoots you a soft smile that makes everything uneasy go away. It's cliché but you can't believe that it works, because all you're left is that same excitement again.

As the driver makes sure Jungkook gave him the right address, he looks at you questionably because it's not like he put his address because he expects anything from this. It's because his address was added automatically and he didn't give that much thought into it when he was trying to get you through the crowd. But you give him a sheepish grin and cuddle up to him, leaning your head against his shoulder which causes Jungkook to confirm the address.

Jungkook doesn't touch you more than it's necessarily though, his hand stays respectively on your knee and doesn't go any further, while you're gripping his biceps and can't help the stupid grin you hope he doesn't see.

The ride to Jungkook's apartment building is short but feels like a big journey because by the time the driver stops in front of it, you're ready to jump out of the car the second he slows down the vehicle. Just like when you were getting into the car, Jungkook holds the door for you and helps you get out of it, thanking the driver before he shuts the door and hurries to the warmth of the building.

Following Jungkook into his apartment seems kind of funny because you've been here so often, that you'd be able to find the way while being blindfolded. Yet, you're staying a little behind him following him as if you were clueless where he's taking you.

Once Jungkook unlocks his apartment and the doors are shut with you inside, you're already taking your shoes.

"Listen--"

You don't, you're too quick and sorry that you've cut him off which hasn't been done purposely. By the time Jungkook has tried to tell you something, you've already kissed him. Realizing what you've done, you pull away with a sheepish grin and hot cheeks.

"Hm?" you ask cutely, hands innocently behind you as Jungkook's eyes darken and he's the one who pulls you closer and kisses you.

Giggling into the kiss, you realize you can taste the slightest hint of Jungkook's drink he has drunk at the club. But oddly, he tastes like him. His cologne and the flowery smell he always holds fill your nostrils more than ever, now that you're in a place that's not filled with body odors. You're hypnotized, that's how you're feeling when you tug him towards the living room with mouth still on his.

The only time you let your mouth detach is when you push him down on the couch, happy when he successfully lands onto his butt with legs spread out. He's so hot, button-up slightly crinkled from your heavy making out and your needy hands. His hair is messy as he's looking up at you from his sitting position through hooded eyes, causing you to drop to your knees right away.

His eyes widen for a moment, but you don't stare into them long enough as you're leaning towards his lips to kiss him again. No words exchanged, your needy hands unbutton a few buttons on his shirt, exposing more skin and the chest that got definitely bigger than the last time you saw him. And he's not even fully naked. He's so much broader and you're trying hard not to literally salivate.

His hands land on your hips as you start peppering kisses to his jaw, slowly down his neck and then chest. The single touch of his hands makes you almost moan out and even though the lust clouds your mind, you're not greedy for an orgasm or him making you feel good. He's already making you feel good just by being there, holding your hips – and it's silly but you can't explain it.

You reach for his belt, unbuckling it eagerly and you're surprised how easy it's going despite your quick movements. Jungkook helps you by lifting his hips off the couch, getting the jeans past his butt but once you touch the hem of his boxers, eyes too distracted by the hard bulge already poking through the thin material, Jungkook mutters your name.

It's like he finally realizes what you're about to do, what position and situation you're both in and he looks almost nervous, despite his hooded eyes filled with lust.

"I don't want you to think you're my distraction,"

Your features soften and you get out of your lusted state for a moment, hands placed over Jungkook's knees instead.

"You're not, I would never do that to you."

It hasn't even crossed your mind that he could use you as a distraction. At least not until he has just mentioned it. If he wanted a distraction, he could've gone home with anyone else. Women have been giving him a good piece (and well deserved) attention. And why Jungkook has decided to go home with you, no matter how random and quick it happened, is beyond you.

"I know," you assure him softly, straightening yourself as you once again lean towards him and gently peck his lips. "Don't think too much about this. If you don't want this, let's just stop it."

Some tiny part of you whines at that, but you know it needs to be said and you really don't want to make any mistake. You know you'll be overplaying this in your head once it ends, no matter how it ends but just for now, you want to enjoy this. It's not like you're doing this for the first time. You already know each other. You know each other's bodies and even though it's been a while, nothing has changed much. Minus Jungkook's huge body growth.

"I do want it," Jungkook admits by mumbling, "I'm just not sure if it's right or wrong."

Well, his hard dick probably wants to argue about that but you're both trying to be adults here. Some failing and some trying to be.

"It's just a blowjob, Jeon," you chuckle, pointing out and silently telling him that it doesn't have to be anymore dramatic. "So," you start, "Do you want it or not?"

He stares at you, longer than you wish him to because it suddenly starts to make you more nervous. And fuck, Jungkook imagines you with his cock in your mouth and randomly gets a flashback of that time when you sucked him off for the first time. In the very same position and room, at the beginning of your deal as Jungkook wanted to make sure it's not something you have to do just to please him. But you were so eager, similarly to what you look like now but there's something different about you. There's a boost of confidence because you've already had him in your mouth, at least that's what he guesses, and he would be an idiot to miss out the opportunity to miss the warmth of your mouth when you're on your knees, staring at him like this.

And maybe, Jungkook's mind is clouded just like yours.

"Pull me out," he says simply, your breath hitching how soft yet dominating he sounds.

Just as you gave him the green light, he left the worry somewhere else and turned into the Jungkook that can have you squeezing your thighs and make you wet by a single demand and sentence.

And you couldn't wait for it.

Eagerly and excitedly, you hook up your fingers under the hem of his boxers just like you've done before, getting even more excited at the sight of his cock again. Boxers joining his jeans pooled around his ankles, his cock springs free and slaps against his stomach right away. The sudden moment surprises you even though you were waiting for it, but you're way more excited to not only get your eyes on it but your mouth and hands too.

Impatiently, you reach for him and wrap your hand around the hard length, you admire the hard and warm flesh. Its red head is asking for attention and the little veins peeking from its soft skin makes you lick your lips once again.

And Jungkook can control himself, he finds the most fun watching you which makes him even more hard (if that's even possible), so when you squeeze him he keeps it quiet and bites into his lip instead. It feels good but it's definitely not enough to let him fully dive into the pleasure. There's a little bit of pre-cum already pooling at the tip of his cock and he knows you see it because your eyes widen in excitement, making you look cute. He can't believe he just thought of you as cute while his cock is in your hand.

There's no time for him to chuckle at his thoughts because you're already enveloping the tip into the warmth of your mouth and fuck... he swears he can see starts because you taste him for the first time in months, the time he thought would have never come. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he's trying to process what's happening right now but it's very hard, especially when you suck him off before you dive even more and start to take more of him every time.

He lets out a pleased sigh, one hand gripped in a fist while the other finds the back of your head, keeping you in place as the sucking sounds resounds from your mouth. It's wet and you drool all over his cock which makes things even more hotter, his head falling back as his mouth stays open while he enjoys your mouth on him and you between his legs.

You're careful, always coming for air whenever you feel like gagging and the rest that you can't fit (or not pressuring yourself to make it fit), is held by your hand as you squeeze him here and there. You're changing your movements, licking him up and down before you suck him, then you're bobbing your head up and down while doing the rest with your hand. And the ultimate spot for him is when you suddenly press his cock against his stomach, licking his balls as you suck on them too. Fuck, you're too good at this. Just like he remembers.

It's like you remember every little spot he has and that's when you're starting to hear soft moans and groans leaving his opened mouth. His thighs are tense, your nails digging into the skin there. His cock barely fits into your mouth but you get creative, opening your mouth as wide as you can at the cost of you drooling all over his cock down to his balls. The button-up that's slightly hiked up unfortunately hides the little trail of hair that goes down to his pubic hair and you wonder if you'll have another chance to see it some other time. This is most likely just a one time thing but you quickly throw that thought away, not wanting to think about the future and what's going to happen.

"Fuck," Jungkook groans, the thighs tensing up and hips slightly bucking up are letting you know he's close because even his grip on your hair gets tighter. Moaning around him, you feel your jaw ache from being opened for a longer time to the point it starts to get uncomfortable, but you don't care and continue sucking him off.

The wet sounds of your mouth that has never left makes Jungkook's head spin and his eyes are pinched close, suddenly remembering what a sight he's missing. So, he raises his head and pries his eyes open just to see you. But the not clearest sight of you doesn't satisfy him enough because he's mostly met with the top of your head.

"Look at me," he demands, voice rough and strained as you obey, looking up at him through your lashes which makes him let out a hitched moan. Something, you're not sure you've ever heard from him before.

"Fuck--I'm coming," he informs you hurriedly, the other hand reaching for your jaw as he cups it. "Where do you want it?"

Obviously, you're not risking answering him verbally because you'd probably rob him from a good orgasm. Fortunately, Jungkook doesn't really wait for a verbal one as he stares at you with a clenched jaw and hooded eyes.

"Your mouth?" he asks and you hum around him, a soft and muffled 'Uhm' by his cock resounds from your mouth. "You're gonna swallow like a good girl? Like you always did?"

Fuck, pleasure shoots through your entire body at his words and you eagerly hum, sucking him harder but keeping the same pace, not wanting to ruin anything.

Jungkook holds his stare as long as his body allows him to, even as he groans and the first ropes of cum shoot out of his tip straight into your mouth. You keep just the tip in, sucking on it while swallowing every drop which makes him shut his eyes and letting himself to release until the very last drop. Some of it comes out slowly after some time but you swallow everything, peppering a last kiss to his tip before you fully pull him out of your mouth and pull away from his softening cock.

He pries his eyes open, reality hitting him and he wonders if you already regret it when he sees you already standing. But then you give him a smile, just a casual smile as if you haven't had his cock inside your mouth just a few seconds ago.

"Mind if I stay over tonight?" you ask casually, leaving him speechless as he sits there, leaned against his couch with his cock still out that glistens from your saliva.

"Yeah, sure," he manages to say.

"Great!" you call out, turning around making your way towards the bathroom but not before you go into his bedroom, pulling one of his t-shirts you know very well.

Jungkook stays there until he hears the shower door close and the water dripping down, hitting the tiles and most likely (definitely) your naked body.

[rosieswriting]

Barty Crouch Jr x Hufflepuff!reader

Summary: After the birthday of your dear friend, Pandora Rosier, Barty doesn´t seem as bad as he did before

Note: I took one of the request of reader "tutoring" barty not knowing he doesn´t need it by @treefairy-28 thank youuuu. And english is not my first language so it probably has some mistakes! And i will do a part 2 to where things get really interesting

Words: 3,2K

You’d always hated Barty Crouch Junior. Everything about him grated on your nerves—the way he spoke too loudly in class, yet still managed to top every exam; the infuriating pet names he used for you; his smug belief that being a Slytherin somehow made him superior, especially to Hufflepuffs like you. His walk, his talk—everything about him seemed designed to annoy you. Luckily, you’d always managed to ignore him. Until now.

You’d recently been paired with Pandora Rosier for a Potions project, and to your surprise, you’d quickly grown close. How had you not been friends before? She was sweet, caring, and easy to talk to—similar to you in so many ways. When her birthday rolled around, she invited you to a small celebration at the Three Broomsticks with her twin, Evan, and a few of his friends. Including him. You’d thought long and hard about it, knowing you’d have to deal with Barty, but in the end, you decided to go. After all, it was for Pandora, and you could always try to ignore him.

The Three Broomsticks was packed, busier than you’d expected. It seemed half of Hogwarts was out celebrating. Just as you were scanning the room, you heard Pandora’s cheerful voice calling your name.

“Happy Birthday!” you said warmly, pulling her into a hug and handing her a small box containing a silver necklace.

Pandora’s eyes lit up as she opened it. “Oh, I love this! Thank you so much,” she beamed, hugging you again. “Come on, we’re over here.”

She led you through the crowded room toward a cozy corner table. And, of course, as you approached, you saw Evan Rosier, Regulus Black and Barty leaning back in his chair, already watching you with that familiar smirk.

“Hi” you mumbled a bit shyly to the slytherin as you sat next to Pandora, and to your luck, Barty was seated right in front of you. Regulus and Evan gave you a slight nod of acknowledgment and continue their conversation.

“Look who decided to join us” Barty teased raising his eyebrows “Dindt think you would show up, Treasure”

“Barty” Pandora said with a warning tone to his friend, trying to shut him up. But he only raised his hands in self innocence and exuse himself with a poor “just trying to start a conversation”

“I wouldn’t miss Dora´s birthday just because I have to deal with you, Junior” you said with a fake sweet smile to him.

“Deal with me? You wound me Badger” he said and you rolled your eyes at the nickname.

“If its any consolation, im actually impressed that your ego managed to fit through the door” is the last thing you say before turning to talk to Pandora and ignore him.

You and your blonde friend talk for some time, she telling you about how her birthday has been and all the presents she got. At some point you start to get thirsty.

“Im gonna ask for something to drink, ill be right back” you say kindly as you stand up from the chair.

“I’ll go with you” you hear Barty says as he stands up as well.

“Great” you whisper under your breath as you start to make your way to the bar, him following behind you.

You ordered a butterbeer, and Barty, naturally, ordered the same, positioning himself so close that his shoulder brushed against yours. The warm, subtle contact sent an unexpected flutter through you, though you tried to ignore it.

“I must admit,” he began, leaning down just enough to speak directly into your ear, “when Evan told us Dora would invite you, my expectations for tonight went up higher.”

“Good for you,” you muttered, turning to face him with an eye roll, only to find his face so close that you could feel his breath on your cheek. You quickly turned your gaze forward again, pretending to study the bottles lined up behind the bar. He chuckled, catching the slight blush that had crept up your cheeks “When Dora mentioned you were coming, I almost declined her invitation” you continued, doing your best to sound unfazed

 “If you say so. But, can I just say, you show up here looking like this, put me in my place with that sweet, sassy voice of yours… you’re killing me here.”

Despite yourself, you feel warmth creeping up your cheeks.  Thankfully, the bartender hands you both your drinks before you have to answer. You turn to make your way back to the table, but Barty steps in front of you, forcing you to stop short as he smirks down at you, close enough that you catch the faintest spark in his gaze.

“You know, I think you secretly like driving me a little mad,” he murmurs, amusement flickering in his eyes. “It’s cute, really—seeing you pretend to be so above it all.”

“Pretend?” you scoff, raising an eyebrow as you try to sidestep him. “Trust me, Junior, I’m not pretending anything.”

“Oh, really?” he asks, following you smoothly, keeping pace as you try to dodge around him. “Then explain why you look so flustered.”

“I’m not—” You stop, realizing he’s caught you, the faint blush on your cheeks betraying you. You try to shrug it off, holding your head high. “In your dreams, Junior”

He grins, leaning in close enough that his voice is a murmur just for you. “Oh, Treasure. In my dreams we are doing more than talking. Belive me”

You huffed, finally brushing past him and making your way back to the table. “Idiot,” you muttered, though you couldn’t ignore the faint thrill left in the air.

Sliding back into your seat next to Pandora, you tried to steady yourself as she happily dove back into conversation, thankfully distracting you from the lingering heat in your cheeks and Barty’s lingering gaze across the table.

As the night wore on, you and the slytherins stepped out of the warm, bustling atmosphere of the Three Broomsticks into the chilly night air. The sharp bite of winter nipped at your skin, making you shiver as you wrapped your arms around yourself in a futile attempt to keep warm. You hadn’t brought a jacket and now you were regretting it.

Pandora was chatting animatedly with Evan and Regulus, blissfully unaware of your growing discomfort. Barty walked alongside you, his familiar smirk already playing on his lips. You knew he was about to make a comment, and you braced yourself.

Without warning, Barty slipped off his leather jacket and draped it over your shoulders, pulling it tightly around you before you had the chance to protest. “Here, wear this,” he said, his voice low and smooth, ignoring your startled expression. “You look like you’re about to freeze to death.”

You blinked at him, flustered. “You don´t have to-” you start but he cuts you off.

“Please, like I’d let you suffer while I stand here all warm and toasty.” He chuckled. “You show up looking all stunning, and I won’t let you ruin it by turning into an icicle.”

Your cheeks flushed at the unexpected gesture, the warmth of his jacket enveloping you like a shield. You tried to regain your composure, shivering slightly as you adjusted the jacket to fit more snugly. “Thanks, but I don’t need your charity, Junior.” You weren´t willing to give up that easily.

“Oh, is that what you’re calling it? Charity?” he teased, falling into step beside you again, his grin infuriatingly charming. “I thought it was more of a gentlemanly move, if you will.”

“Gentlemanly? You?” You scoffed, shaking your head in disbelief. “You must be joking.”

“Why so skeptical? I can be quite the gentleman when the mood strikes me,” he said, leaning in closer again, his voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. “Besides, I can’t have my favorite Hufflepuff catching a cold now, can I?”

You felt a rush of warmth flood your cheeks at his words, and you tried to deflect, “You’re just doing this to annoy me, aren’t you?”

“Maybe,” he replied, a cheeky glint in his eyes. “But I also happen to enjoy the view when you’re flustered. You should see your face right now. It’s adorable.”

“Adorable?” You repeated incredulously, fighting the urge to smile. “You really think you’re charming, don’t you?”

He leaned back slightly, feigning deep thought. “Well, I wouldn’t say charming. More like irresistible.”

You shook your head, biting back a smile as you shot him a glare. “Keep dreaming, Junior.”

“Trust me, I will,” he shot back with that devil-may-care grin.

Pandora turned to you both, her eyes sparkling with delight. “Oh my gosh, you two are so cute! You’re practically flirting!” she gushed, completely unaware of your desire to bury your face in your hands.

“Flirting?” you exclaimed, turning to Barty in disbelief. “This isn’t flirting; it’s sheer torture!”

Barty chuckled, his gaze locked on yours, mischief dancing in his eyes. “Torture? Maybe I’ll have to keep it up then. Can’t have you getting too comfortable, can we?”

As you walked back to Hogwarts, you could feel the weight of his jacket around your shoulders, and though you’d never admit it, the warmth was more than just physical. Despite the banter and the bickering, you couldn’t shake the flutter in your stomach. Barty Crouch Junior might drive you mad, but maybe—just maybe—there was something nice about having him around after all.

You arrive to Hogwarts and everyone makes their way to their common room, the boys to Slytherin´s, Pandora to Ravenclaw´s and you to Hufflepuff´s. You get into your dorm quietly, because even if it was a Friday night, your roomates were sleeping.

As you began to undress, you suddenly realized you still had Barty’s jacket draped over your shoulders. Great, you thought with an eye roll. Now I have to see him again. You sighed, folding it neatly and placing it in your wardrobe alongside your other clothes.

After a quick trip to the bathroom to wash off your makeup and change into your pajamas, you settled into bed. The comfort of your blankets enveloped you, but no matter how hard you tried to shake it off, the memory of Barty's teasing grin lingered in your mind.

You hated that the last thought before sleep was that goddamn smirk of his—so infuriating yet somehow captivating. With a frustrated huff, you turned over, determined to banish thoughts of him, but the image of his charming arrogance persisted, a playful reminder of the night’s events.

You woke up the next day, the soft sunlight filtering through the windows of your dormitory. The quiet of the weekend morning was a welcome contrast to the usual hustle and bustle of school life. You moved through your routine slowly, knowing you had no classes to rush to today. After freshing up, you dressed casually and made your way to the Great Hall for breakfast. You decided to take Barty´s jacket with you, so you could return it as soon as possible.

And thanks to Merlin, when you enter the Great Hall you immediately spotted him at the Slytherin table with his friends. You wave at your own friends and make them a signal to wait for you as you approached the green table, your friends staring at you like you had gone crazy.

“Junior” you call out softly from behind him.

Barty´s head whipped around, his grin widening when he saw you “Treasure!” his voice was full of amusement as he looked you up and down “Miss me alredy?”

You rolled your eyes and extended his jacket over him “Im here to return this, and to say thank you again” even if he was insufferable, you were always polite.

He raised an eyebrow, clearly pleased by your words, as he took the jacket from you “You know, I was hoping you would keep it for longer. You did look amazing in it. Not that I didn’t like you in your top, of course”

You felt the heat increasing in your cheeks at his words but try to hide it with a scoff, your hands instinctively moving to fold your arms across your chest. “Whatever” you muttered, stepping back and already starting to turn away “Goodbye”

Some days later you were sitting with your friends in the courtyard, laughing as you discussed the latest mishap in Potions class, when you noticed a familiar figure making his way toward you. Barty Crouch Jr, in all his swagger, had that unmistakable smirk as he approached your small circle, his eyes already fixed on you.

"Treasure," he greeted smoothly, nodding to your friends before focusing entirely on you. "Got a minute?"

You raised an eyebrow, a bit taken aback that he’d be seeking you out in broad daylight, in front of witnesses no less. “Depends. What do you want, Junior?”

He chuckled, unfazed by your tone. "Pandora said you’re somewhat of an expert in Magical Creatures. Thought maybe you could help a struggling Slytherin with a few... basics.”

Your friends exchanged glances, one of them biting back a smile as they elbowed each other. You tried to ignore it, focusing on Barty. “Struggling?” you echoed, skeptical. “You’re one of the top students. Why do you need my help?”

He shrugged, managing to look both innocent and mischievous. “Call it an off week. I could use some extra guidance.”

One of your friends couldn’t resist chiming in, “Are you sure you don’t just want to copy her notes, Barty?”

“Oh, I’d love to copy,” he said, giving you a pointed look, “but I think I’d learn more if we… studied together. Say, this afternoon?”

“Fine,” you said, ignoring the snickers from your friends. “The library at six?”

“Or my room?” he suggested, not missing a beat. “Much quieter. Comfier too.”

You rolled your eyes, even as your friends burst into laughter. “Nice try. The library will do just fine.”

He placed a hand over his heart, feigning disappointment. “Heartbreaking, really. I was hoping for a more… private lesson.”

“Guess you’ll just have to settle for learning in public,” you replied, a smile tugging at the corner of your mouth. “See you at six, Junior.”

“Wouldn’t miss it,” he said, his smirk widening.

With that, he turned and sauntered off, leaving your friends barely containing their laughter.

“Oh, Merlin,” one of them said as soon as he was out of earshot, “did Barty Crouch Jr. just ask you for a tutoring session?”

You sighed, trying not to show the flutter of nerves in your stomach. “Apparently. And he’d better actually need help with Magical Creatures.”

But even as you turned back to your conversation, you couldn’t shake the feeling that this “study session” was going to be anything but ordinary.

That evening, you made your way to the library with a stack of notes on magical creatures and a determination to focus—no matter how distracting your “student” might try to be. When you arrived, you saw Barty lounging at a back table, idly flipping through a book that looked suspiciously unrelated to magical creatures.

“Good, you’re here,” he said with a grin as you sat down. “I was starting to think you’d stand me up.”

You rolled your eyes as you sat in front of him “Almost did” you mumble under your breath as you opened your book and notes. The library was quiet as you huddled over a hefty tome on magical creatures, quills and parchment spread across the table between you. It seemed like he was genuinely focused—or at least, he pretended to be.

“Alright, Junior” you said, pointing to a section in Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, “why don’t you tell me everything you know about hippogriffs?”

He gave you a thoughtful look, scratching his chin as if deep in concentration. “Hmm… majestic creatures, proud, can be very dangerous if approached incorrectly… does that sound right?”

You tilted your head, eyeing him suspiciously. “So you do know about them, after all. That’s a decent start.”

“Well, I have the basics,” he said with a little grin, “but I wouldn’t call myself an expert. That’s where you come in, Treasure.”

You rolled your eyes but smiled anyway, nudging the book closer to him. “Alright, fine. Hippogriffs are proud, but there’s more to them than that. They’re highly sensitive and require respect—bowing to them before approaching is essential.”

He nodded, trying to keep a straight face, though you could tell he was amused. “Bowing. Got it. Sort of like dealing with you, isn’t it? Respect, admiration…”

You huffed, fighting the warmth creeping into your cheeks. “Keep it up, and I’ll leave you to fend for yourself next time we have a test.”

“Anything but that,” he said, raising his hands in mock surrender, though his grin didn’t fade. “You’re far too charming when you’re lecturing me on magical creatures.”

You ignored him and went over a few more creatures, each time finding him surprisingly attentive. He asked questions—good ones, actually—and seemed engaged in a way you hadn’t expected. You started to think maybe he genuinely did want to learn more about the subject.

As the library began to empty, you glanced at the time. “We should probably get some dinner before the house-elves clear the tables,” you said, gathering your notes.

You started to walk to the Great Hall, still in conversation about the finer points of bowtruckles, when something slipped out from under his arm and fluttered to the ground. You instinctively bent down to pick it up, and your eyes widened as you caught sight of the parchment. It was an essay titled “The Lifecycle of Thestrals” with “A” scrawled at the top in red ink. The neat handwriting and the perfectly structured points left no doubt: Barty had known exactly what he was doing in Care of Magical Creatures all along.

You blinked, looking from the essay to Barty, who wore a guilty-but-unbothered grin.

“What’s this?” you asked, eyebrows raised. “You didn’t need my help at all, did you?”

“Guilty as charged,” he replied, his smirk widening.

You scoffed, folding your arms. “Unbelievable. So you wasted my time?”

He leaned in, voice dropping to a low murmur. “Come on, can you really blame me?” His eyes held that familiar glint. “When Pandora mentioned you were the go-to expert on magical creatures, I knew I couldn’t miss the chance. I mean, who wouldn’t want to spend a few hours with someone as pretty as you, Treasure?”

Heat crept up your cheeks, and you looked away, trying not to let him see how flustered you felt. “You are unbelievable,” you muttered, but your voice came out softer than you intended.

“Unbelievably charming? I’ll take it,” he said, grinning as you approached the Great Hall. “I had a great time, by the way. Maybe next time, we can have a... more private study session.”

He threw you a wink before sauntering off toward the Slytherin table, leaving you standing there, cheeks flushed, speechless, and—if you were being honest with yourself—a bit confused. Because somehow, despite his insufferable arrogance, the idea of spending more time with him didn’t sound half as annoying as you’d expected.

[thephantomsdream]

so I've been reading real published romance books and they cannot fill the void that ao3 and company do fill, but they did give me an idea. ok, lmfao, hear me out. (I've had this in my drafts for way too long, i decided to release it because why tf not)

content: alien!141, soulmates!141, abduction, intergalactic human trafficking, space shit; very vague idea of anything ever; probably made up alien names; writer is at work while dealing with annoying costumers so it's rushed and dumb.

imagine:

Good ol' you, in your house, unaware that in the deep, vast universe, trafficking also existed. Not long ago, a reptilian race found out about our warm bodies, interesting features and intelligent yet primitive brains, and started to abduct and sell men and women to rich buyers. It was good business, especially considering our side of the universe wasn't even aware of extraterrestrial life, so they couldn't even guess where they disappeared! The treaty and all intergalactic laws were vague about us. "Let them be" meaning "Let them fuckers figure their shit out, lol idk".

Well, as you can understand, the Sheh'deauz (lmfao stay with me) decided to in fact not let us be. So back to lovely you, yeah?

Home alone, playing videogames or something, when suddently you see some flashes of light out the window. It was weird considering it wasn't raining but you remained calm, as you assumed maybe a storm is approaching? Mainly, you couldn't give a shit but the moment you heard scratching and hissing outside your door, you panicked. Long story short, your house slowly started filling with an invisible gas that just made you pass out, but you did see your door opening, same weird blue-white light emanating from under it as it did, and a scaly leg entering your home as you fell on the floor.

You figured, as the genius that you were, that you were, in fact, not dreaming as you spent many hours (days? felt like days) in a cage. Very oddly technologically advanced. In another strike of genius, and of course, after seeing your kidnappers, you figured it was a spaceship and you were in some deep sci-fi shit. (maybe after laughing and asking them where are the hidden cameras. i would...)

After throwing tantrums and having the ugly multi-colored creatures mock you and hiss at you, you kinda gave up and sat by the very human bed you've been given and allowed time to pass. You were given food every so often, a toilet nearby, water at your disposal. But you feared for your life.

Well, let me tell you something. You have the luckiest misfortune of all, really. Or maybe, just maybe, things are meant to be this way. Maybe it was all meant to happen like this. Allow me to explain.

In another corner of the universe, four of the greatest warriors of the Intergalactic Army frowned at a holographic screen. A female alien, older, still beautiful, ethereal looking, skin creamy white with some lavender edges and striking blue eyes was frowning back.

"You're fucking kidding me." Their captain said (in a different language than ours but your writer here is multi-lingual, don't worry), getting closer to the screen. She just nodded, rubbing her forehead.

"Where is that again?" Asked another.

"So like—" a third one, this one with a distinct accent compared to the others, tilted his head incredulously. "They're our cousins genetically?"

"You can say so." She groaned. "The Council decided to not touch that part of the galaxy. They are being observed. Fucking hell! They were going on the right path."

"If they don't destroy their own planet before." The captain muttered, voice tired and coarse. In his many, many years lived, he's seen it happen again and again. Greed and stupidity almost whipped their race, so he's been following the Terrans close-by, as close as a mere Intergalactic Task Force Captain (stick with me lmfao) could follow.

"So what's the plan?" The tallest one asked, mask made of what others assumed was one of his most dangerous prey's skull was placed on his face.

"We give them hell." Captain commanded, Laswell nodding.

"Stay close, at the outskirts of their galaxy. We intercept any package and find their buyers."

"What do we do with our lil cousins then?"

"Eliminate any witnesses."

Shit went down really quick. You figured they were preparing for something as the guards by your cell somehow summoned some advanced looking chairs from the walls to strap themselves on and hissed at you mockingly, as they've done before. You just sat in a corner, by the bed, and wanted to cry. You were going through all stages of grief every few hours and it was getting exhausting. You were just now starting to understand how dire your situation was and how little chances you had of going home.

They turned off the main lights and a thousand scenarios crossed your mind. It was as if they were bracing for something. You frowned as you saw the guards tense as some alien hieroglyphics appeared on a holographic screen. It looked... like a countdown... You grasped the bed, trying to brace yourself for something. And good that you did because it felt as if the ship collapsed with something.

It basically shook you off to the ground, and while you'd think this was supposed to happen, you quickly realize it wasn't since the guards unstrapped themselves from the chairs and started shrieking as alarms suddently blared. After that? Seconds and it was over. Two white blasts ended them both, hitting them exactly in the middle of their ugly skulls. You did not hear any footsteps but you saw a shadow approaching your cell, so you scurried closer to your bed and now presumably magic shield that will block blasts that melt alien skulls.

The barriers from your cell unlocked, sliding to the sides and someone jumped in front of you. Someone big, dressed sleekly in black, although you could swear the edges of his frame looked transparent for a second. It was big, yet had the complexity of a human so you stayed locked in place, big scared eyes on the person pointing a big son-of-a-bitch gun at you. You heard it growl and speak something shortly, and the hairs on your whole body pricked.

World stopped for Price as he cracked another neck, just after locking eyes with the leader of this "cargo" ship. He was about to take a step forward to gently guide this person towards personal enlightenment by confessing all the information they needed, even if it would be involuntarily, when Soap spoke... well, growled just one word in their comms.

"Mate."

[viennacherries]

Prompt suggestion <3 Rolan/Tav NSFW. Tav really likes it when Rolan speaks to her in infernal. She doesn’t understand it, but it doesn’t change the fact that it turns her on. He starts to notice her subtle reactions to when he curses or something in infernal. Which leads to bedroom shenanigans lol. My username is the same on A03 ^^

this has taken me a minute, mostly because i had to spend some time literally making up the infernal language for the purpose of this fic LMAO. if you're interested in my process it's in the end notes on ao3.

i changed the prompt a little though; rolan doesnt notice because he's very silly and keeps failing the perception check. lia notices immediently.

NSFW read on ao3 here

~~~

The first time Tav hears Rolan speak infernal, she doesn't even register it as a word. It slips past his tongue and it's all consonants and noises that she's not sure she could emulate properly with her non-tiefling tongue.

"Zurgan." He mutters it under his breath as he drops a pile of books.

Her quill stops midair where she's busy writing up an inventory of magical items they've found. With everyone else busy or gone from the city, she offered to help Rolan with organising the tower. It's been a nightmare, frankly. The previous tower master (she wont do him the privilege of speaking his name, the bastard) had apparently spent the last who-knows-how-many years stuffing things into random shelves and boxes.

She frowns as she tries to repeat the word, "Zu- Zurgan? What's that mean?"

Rolan jumps, clearly having forgotten she's in the room, "not zurgan, zurgan. It means- well, I don't know if it translates literally to common. It's... an expletive, I suppose ."

She laughs, "so it means 'fuck'?"

He huffs, and rolls his eyes, "I suppose that's a close enough approximation, yes."

"I don't think I've ever heard you swear before."

"Well," his brow is furrowed as he thinks, "I suppose I try not to, really. It's not becoming."

Tav snorts at that, "Gods, how old are you, 150? Besides, how is swearing in tiefling any different?"

"The language is called infernal, you uncultured swine. I'm a tiefling, I speak infernal."

"You speak something alright. Usually a crock of shi-"

"What did I say about it not being becoming, hm?"

She rolls her eyes at him, "so sorry, Master Rolan, please accept my humblest of apologies for disgracing your presence in such a regard."

He rolls his eyes at her, but she hears him snort and sees the quirk of his lip. "I suppose as far as apologies go, that one will suffice."

~~~

Several weeks later, Cal shouts through the door to the study where they're cataloguing evocation books, "Rolan! Lia and I are heading to the market, do you want us to pick up more of the wine you like?"

He laughs, which is rare enough in itself, and leans out the door to reply.

"Fazit drakon'ziz orum?!"

She hears Cal's responding cackle from down the hallway. "alright, alright, little drakon'ziz. I'll get 2 bottles, 'cos I love you."

When Rolan comes back in, chuckling to himself, Tav doesn't say anything. She wants to ask what it means, but she's... distracted.

Something about the way the words sound when he says them is... enticing. She's not sure if she could repeat them without butchering them, but even if she could she's sure they wouldn't sound as delicious as when they come from him. It's something about the rich tone to his voice, which she's always liked, coupled with the harsher edge it takes on when he speaks the foreign language.

Gods, she's been spending far too much time with him,

She clears her throat, "drakon'ziz?"

Rolan turns to her, still smiling, " drakon'ziz , but close. It means dragon."

His lopsided smile, aimed at her, coupled with the gruffness of the unknown word, is a little bit intoxicating.

"What about the rest of what you said? Fa- Fazit something?"

"'Fazit drakon'ziz orum?' It means 'does a dragon want gold?' It's a tiefling saying, basically means 'yes, obviously.' It just sounds better in infernal."

Tav agrees. It sounds rather lovely in infernal, in fact.

When Tav doesn't reply, he raises an eyebrow, "I could try and teach you some? Infernal, that is. If you'd be interested. Tell me something you want to be able to say, I'll try and teach you how to say it."

She thinks for a moment.

"What if I want to call someone a shit-head?"

He barks out a laugh as he rolls his eyes, "of course you'd just want to know how to insult people. I think the closest translation would be uzterku'zereb.  That means 'shit-for-brains'."

Despite the small jolt her stomach gives as he utters the phrase, she starts cackling. "That's even better!"

~~~

It's been about a month and a half since they started cataloguing everything in the tower, and it's basically become a nightly occurrence that Tav stays for dinner with them. Rolan has finally sat down at the dining table, after bringing all the dishes and cutlery through, and right as he hits the chair there's a sheepish voice from beside him.

"... Rolan~" It's Lia, in a singsong voice, and he huffs.

"What do you want?" It's a question, but it sounds more like an admonishment.

"How could you?! Assuming I want something from you. My beloved big brother. I look up to you so much. Also I left my drink in the sitting room."

You and Callum both laugh, and he makes a very dramatic show of pushing his chair back out with a huge sigh.

"You're such a..." He flails for a moment, as if the word in common has escaped him, "an uztanatez. Next time, you're getting it yourself."

She laughs, "My dear brother, I would fall on my sword for you."

"Mhm." He grumbles, " gladiz zurzum kuluz ..."

Cal nearly falls out of his chair laughing as Rolan trudges from the room, and Lia has a grin on her face from successfully riling him up and getting what she wanted.

Tav is blushing.

"What did he say?" She feels hesitant to bring attention to herself when she knows she's bright red, but she's also too nosy for her own good.

Lia looks at her and opens her mouth to answer, but pauses as she takes in Tav's face. Cal, blissfully, doesn't notice.

"Well the first bit was him calling her a suck up," he laughs through his explanation, "and the second bit was him telling her exactly where she could shove her sword."

She laughs, and thanks him for telling her. Lia is still looking at her. Her face warms more.

"What?"

"Hm." Lia smiles in a way that looks slightly threatening; the way Tav imagines a shark would smile at a seal before taking a huge chunk out of it. "Nothing, really. Only, you weren't that flushed before Rolan spoke in infernal. Got a thing for the devil's tongue, have you Tav?"

Cal furrows his eyebrows in confusion, before his eyes widen and his mouth drops in an 'o' of understanding.

She's about to deny it but she can feel that she's even redder now, so instead she buries her face in her hands. "Don't you dare! Don't you dare say anything!"

"Say anything about what?" Of course Rolan would walk back in now. He places Lia's cup in front of her and turns to Tav expectantly, but Lia speaks before she can.

"Tav is just embarrassed because she didn't understand what you said, she felt left out."

His face breaks into a look of confusion, "You shouldn't be embarrassed by that, Tav, you don't speak the language. Uztanatez-" Tav sucks in a breath, and Lia snorts, "means 'bootlicker'. Gladiz zurzum kuluz means... well... 'shove your sword up your rear'."

Cal and Lia are both sporting shit eating grins. Tav thinks now is a good time to pick a God and pray.

~~~

" Pulch'zer."

He says it as she walks through the door to the study one morning.

"Sorry, repeat that?"

His eyes widen, and his face flushes a deep crimson colour. She's never seen him blush before, or at least she's never noticed because of his skin's natural shade.

"Sorry I was just..." He averts his gaze, looking back at the paperwork he's working on, "I was just thinking out loud..."

She chuckles lightly. "Ah, that text will be kicking your ass then. Pulch'zer. What does it mean?"

He looks up at her again. His eyes lock with hers.

"You're close, it's not pulch'zer, it's pulch'zer . You have to put more emphasis on the 'Z' sound."

Gods, she needs to stop asking. He always ends up correcting her, and she always ends up going bright pink. He pronounces the words more precisely when he's teaching her how to say them, it drives her insane.

"Pulch- Pulch? Pulch'zer."

He chuckles, stands and walks over to her. "You're close, but now you're putting too much emphasis on it." He's only an arms length away from her now. " Pulch'zer ."

She gulps. He needs to stop repeating it.

"P- Pulch'zer." She can't tear her eyes away from him, she stares right into his gaze as she repeats it. He sucks a small breath in, so small it's barely noticeable.

"Yes. Very good."

There's a pause.

"So. What does it mean?"

He's flushing again. "It... Well. It..."

She raises an eyebrow, "that bad huh?"

"... it means 'beautiful'."

Tav's face twists in confusion. "What about your book is beaut-"

Rolan surges forward and plants his lips on hers. She gasps into it, the rest of her words swallowed by her inhale and his tongue. She sinks into it. His hands fall onto her waist, and he uses them to drag her closer, pulling the whole length of his body against hers. When he pulls away it feels far too soon, but in his defence he's breathless. He only leans his chest away, his hips still against hers.

"I wasn't talking about the book."

The look in his eyes is vulnerable in a way she's never seen him before. As though he desperately wants her to understand, and yet is terrified that she will. Like he's scared to fracture whatever comfortable thing they've fallen into together.

"Well..." She takes a deep breath, rests a hand on his chest. "Then I'd like you to know that I think you're very pulch'zer."

He sucks in through his teeth and lets out a single disbelieving laugh. "That sounds ridiculously good when you say it, you know."

She snorts, dismissive, "please, it's far better when you say it. I love when you speak infernal."

He stares at her.

She feels her eyes bug out of her head as what she said hits her. "I mean! Not that- I don't mean that like-"

"You love it? What does that mean?"

She can feel the heat in her face. Suddenly everywhere he's touching her is too much, she needs to fall through the floor to a new realm and start her life over with a fake name.

"I don't- I didn't mean-"

As she fumbles over her words, Rolan's face starts to lift into an understanding smirk. "Oh. I see. You love it."

He leans forward towards her, and his lips brush her ear.

"Tibiz plazet link'zon mezoq ?"

She shudders, "Rolan, I have no idea what you're saying."

He chuckles lowly against the shell of her ear. " Zedzit'n, nul'umne? Zede illizquit diko ."

Gods, it's torturous. He's dropped his voice an octave, giving the already heavy words an even more gravelled tone. Her breath is coming out in pants and she whines. The way it's affecting her is ridiculous.

He doesn't stop, " morentez me'zam? Notzo'illi ."

"Rolan, please."

He grins against her, and she feels his length pressing against her body through his robes. " Quid plaket, dilekt'miz ?"

" Rolan , common tongue, please . I want to know what you're saying."

"I said 'please what?'"

Tav huffs in irritation, "I don't know."

He brings his lips up to brush hers, smiling against her as she tries to pull him closer.

"Do you want me to kiss you again?"

She swallows hard around the lump in her throat and nods.

"Mhm. Ask me nicely."

The noise she lets out is embarrassing, a high pitched whine that she couldn't stop if she tried, but she feels his breath against her lips as he exhales in excitement.

"Kiss me, Rolan. Please."

His smile is wide against her, "as you wish, pulch'zer."

When he kisses her, his lips are gentle against hers. Soft and pliant, eager but restrained. When he parts them slowly, she responds in kind and finds his tongue with hers, and he rewards her with a deep, sensual moan from low in his throat. His lips are warm and soft, his mouth tastes of spearmint, his breath flows through her. She feels her small-clothes growing damp.

As he deepens the kiss his movements grow more insistent, more intense, and he squeezes her hips as he grinds her into him. She moans in response and the noise flips a switch in him. All of a sudden his lips are frantic, the kiss turning messy and needy, and his hands are running up and down her body as thought they don't know where to settle.

He pulls back enough to speak, his breath dancing along her lips, his voice barely above a whisper. " Nezkiz quid'mih fakiaz. Volui'illi tamd'umne ."

Tav moans, long and slow as the words rush over her skin, "Gods, Rolan. I wish I knew what you were saying. Fuck ."

He chuckles quietly, "perhaps I'll teach you Comprehend Languages. Then again... Forzit adv'illi."

She groans. "Rolan, please ."

He grins, grinding his length against her, "please, what?"

The huff she lets out is impatient, "you know what."

His mouth traces the shell of her ear again and she shivers. "Perhaps. But tell me anyway."

She groans, "please fuck me, Rolan."

He needs no further invitation. Rolan undresses them both rapidly, swift and efficient just as he treats his work, and they're both bare before each-other in a few moments.

When he looks over her, sweeping his eyes across her form, he lets out a low noise of appreciation. "Hells, Tav, you're beautiful."

She feels nervous, all of a sudden, bare before him, but she smiles despite it. "So are you."

He's back on her, trailing his lips along her throat and collarbone, leaving teasing bites and grazes with his canines. She's a whimpering, writhing mess beneath him but she doesn't care. She can feel his length pressed against her stomach, can feel the grooves of the door on her back, and she's absolutely aching with need.

"Is this okay? Are you comfortable?" His questions make her chest ache with a different kind of need to the one pulsing through her core.

"Yes, Rolan. Please, for the love of- fuck me against this door."

His moan in response to her words is loud and wanton. " Hells , Tav. Lift your leg for me."

She does, and he grabs under her knee, lifting it up so it wraps around his hip, the heel of her foot against the base of his tail while her other foot stays planted against the floor. His other hand comes between them, grips the base of his cock and rubs it against her folds. She throws her head back as she keens, and at the same time he lets out a groan closer to a growl.

"Fuck, you're so wet. Is- This is still okay? You want this?" His voice wavers with lust.

Hearing him curse is almost as incredible as hearing him speak infernal. "Yes , Gods if you don't-"

He's sliding himself into her before she can finish her threat, and the rest of her words fizzle out into a high pitched moan as she throws her head back. His length is ridged and she can feel every notch as it slides into her. He works his way into her slowly, thrusting only an inch at a time until his pelvis comes to rest against hers, and he folds over to rest his forehead against her shoulder.

His first half of his sentence is muttered, the second half directed at her, "Tam strikta , fuck. Ita infek'tum strikta. Tell me when you're ready, dilekt'miz."

"I'm ready, please, fuck me."

He silences his own moan by clamping his mouth over the meat between her neck and shoulder, and begins thrusting shallowly. The slide of him inside her, the ridges on his shaft dragging against her walls, has her tightening her leg around his waist and dragging him closer. He grunts through his mouthful of her skin and starts to pick up his pace, until he's thrusting hard and fast into her.

She's a mess, and she knows it, but it doesn't matter. She's digging her heel into his ass and arching her hips away from the door to get closer to him, head thrown back and eyes wrenched shut. It's too much, but it's not enough. She grabs his hand that isn't holding her knee up and places it round the back of her other thigh. He's a quick study as always, taking a firm hold on the back of her leg and hoisting her other leg up around him, so she's held up against the door by just his weight against her and his bruising grip. It changes the angle, he drives deeper into her, and they both moan in tandem.

He's speaking again, infernal dialect spilling from him freely into her skin, " Nezkiz. Nezkiz quam di'tez vellem. Quamdiu korpuz tuum'kontraz petivi. Vid'tez habzeq. Miz'tib animez'umne ." He speaks the words with a reverence that that has her keening, clenching around him.

"Rolan, I'm so close, fuck don't stop."

He shakes his head, thrusts into her harder, "Hells, I won't, Tav. I won't, I won't, adv'illi, adv'illi -"

The utterance of more quiet infernal words against her tips her over the edge, and she finds her release around him. His movements become stuttered, desperate, " Tez amorez. Tez amorez taz'multo. Perfik'miz. Amaz, amaz, num'quam latuz dezeraz. Morent'illi anim defendam."

He follows her over the precipice and empties himself inside her. She tightens her hold on him with her legs and kisses his neck as his hips twitch through his release, and as he stills they both try to find breath against each-other's skin.

"Gods, Tav." His voice is hoarse, "you- that was- I-"

She chuckles, which makes her walls clench and his hips stutter as he gasps at the feeling. "That was amazing, Rolan. What... Um. What were you saying?"

She pulls away to look at him, and his face is incredibly red. His freckles are barely visible through the violent blush. "Oh, um. Nothing- Nothing, really. Nothing important. Just... babbling. You know."

She laughs, slowly lowering her legs to the ground, both shuddering as he pulls himself from her. He mutters a quick incantation and they're both clean.

"You're going to have to teach me Comprehend Languages, now. I'm far too nosy to leave it at that."

"Hm. We'll see."

~~~

Translations:

"Tibiz plazet link'zon mezoq?" ("You like when I speak to you in my native tongue?")

"Zedzit'n, nul'umne? Zede illizquit diko." ("But you don't care, do you? It's not about what I say.")

"Morentez me'zam? Notzo'illi." ("Moaning for me already? Aren't I lucky.")

Quid plaket, dilekt'miz?" ("Please what, my beloved?")(he lies and tells her it means "please what?")

"Nezkiz quid'mih fakiaz. Volui'illi tamd'umne." ("You have no idea what you do to me. I have wanted you for so long.")

"Then again... Forzit adv'illi." ("Then again... Perhaps I won't.")

"Tam strikta, fuck. Ita infek'tum strikta. Tell me when you're ready, dilekt'miz." ("So wet, fuck. So tight and wet. Tell me when you're ready, my beloved.")

"Nezkiz. Nezkiz quam di'tez vellem. Quamdiu korpuz tuum'kontraz petivi. Vid'tez habzeq. Miz'tib animez'umne." ("You have no idea. You have no idea how long I've wanted you. How long I've craved your body against mine. I have dreamt of having you like this. My soul burns for you.")

"adv'illi" ("I won't.")

"Tez amorez. Tez amorez taz'multo. Perfik'miz. Amaz, amaz, num'quam latuz dezeraz. Morent'illi anim defendam." ("I love you. I love you so much. You complete me. Please, please never leave my side. I would protect you to my dying breath.")

[empress-simps]

Missed Hints

Pairing: Remus Lupin x Fem! Reader CW: Language Genre: Fluff Summary: Remus Lupin wanted to make his feelings known; he is trying numerous ways to tell you, but you are simply quite oblivious to the poor boy’s advances.

Note: Am I a bit too obsessed with Rems? Probably. This one's a bit shorter than the rest. Enjoy reading! Pictures used are from Pinterest, credits to the owners!

Sometimes, all Remus wanted to do was run into a wall to knock himself out.

Maybe it’ll help formulate a reason why you couldn’t pick up his signals and actions that he wants to be more than friends. Please cut this poor boy some slack; he’s literally done everything he could to hint that he likes you.

The problem is that you are quite oblivious- being as dense as the castle walls in Hogwarts. Although this hasn’t stopped Remus from pursuing you after several pitiful (also quite funny) attempts, if anything, it made him work even harder to let you know he fancies you.

“Y/n, wait up!” Remus calls out to you, leaving his mates, who were whispering words of encouragement and ‘good luck’ to him. Hearing your name made you turn around, a book in your hand, as you smiled at the taller boy. “Remus, hi!” He smiled, walking beside you and settling in at the same pace as you. Suddenly, a friend of yours piped up, “Y/n, we have to go get something in the dorms; stay with Remus, yeah?” before you could even reply, they were rushing to leave. Remus could only blush as your friends shot him a thumbs up before escaping the scene, trying to stop the giggles escaping their mouths.

It was all up to him now.

“Erm, so how were the holidays?” he asked, trying to act casually as he placed his hands in his pockets. The question made you hum, your eyes lit up. "Oh, it was wonderful! We spent the holidays in Canada, lots of snow, I made a snow man and visited some parks.” She nods, holding her book closer to her chest, seemingly lost in thought. “It was also freezing.” Remus hums in agreement. “Is that so? I’m glad you had fun.” He smiles, and you both walk towards the great hall to have dinner.

You looked up at him with a bright smile and said, “Tell me about yours, Rems! I’m sure it was also fun.” Remus blushed, hearing his nickname roll off your tongue so casually. Even after all the years you’ve known each other, simply calling him by his nickname that you specially made for him has an effect that never faded away. “Well, it was just simple, really. I just stayed at James’ and had fun.” He shrugged his shoulders, smiling at you. He could care less about his holiday shenanigans, preferring you just talk his ear off about every little thing you did, he will absorb what you say word by word, like a sponge.

 "Well, James is quite an interesting person.” She hummed in agreement, Remus felt his eyebrow twitch, a small twinge similar to jealousy creeping up into him. What about him? Do you think he’s interesting too? Was Remus someone who could be worthy of your time?

 “Yeah, that bloke was conjuring up some pranks to pull this year.”

You let out a small giggle and oh merlin please take the poor boy to Madame Pomfrey because he thinks his poor heart can’t handle all the feelings he has towards you. Remus Lupin is such a simp.

He clears his throat, trying to muster up some courage as he asks you the million-galleon question. “So, are you free tomorrow? It’s Hogsmeade day.” Remus smiles, thankfully, his clammy hands are kept under his pockets, making his nervousness almost unnoticeable. Your eyes lit up “Oh! I forgot, but yes, I am free tomorrow.” Remus saw his chance and took it. “Great, how about we hang out in Three Broomsticks?”

For Merlin’s sake, please make this turn into Lupin’s favor. He’s done too many ways to confess to your clueless self.

“That would be fantastic! I can bring my friends along, and you can bring James, Sirius, and Peter too!” you clapped your hands excitedly, not noticing how the werewolf visibly deflated as you exclaimed. Right, might as well reject him right now on the spot to end his misery.

He could probably shout “I love you” and stare at you directly- but you’ll just think he’s talking to someone behind you. Remus had also tried to pass you a note containing his feelings for you back then. Grabbing it without much of a thought, you passed it to your friend, thinking he wants you to give it to her, who shakes her head and sighs, looking at Remus.

The rest of the Marauders and your friends think Remus’s plans of confessing to you were a lost cause.

“Our poor Moony…” Peter frowns, as James shakes his head. “At this point, Moony should just kiss her.” Sirius sighed, feeling pity for his friend. “She would probably think it was a friendly kiss.” Peter snorts, trying to control his laughter, James glared at Sirius jokingly before pushing him. “Bugger off Pads, Y/N’s just… super innocent? I guess.” They resumed watching the two from a distance, a look of anticipation evident in their faces.

“I was kind of hoping it’ll be just us?” Remus grins nervously, sitting beside you as you reach the Gryffindor table. You took a bite out of the apple pie from your plate before replying, “Sure, it’ll still be fun. You’re a great company, Rems.” She smiles, before resuming on eating the remaining apple pie slice. Little do you know the simple compliment you made had a tremendous effect on Remus.

“Moony, your smile hasn’t left your face ever since Y/n agreed. Stop it, I’m getting scared.” Sirius states, Remus turns to look, a hint of a small dopey smile on his face. “Hm?”

“Oh merlin, Y/n broke him.” Peter blanches. They were smacked upside their heads lightly by James. “Come on now, don’t rain on his parade. Moon’s just… well- over the moon.” James laughs lightly, Sirius snorts while Peter tries to hide his smile. Remus rolled his eyes playfully, opening his trunk to pick out the clothes he’s going to wear tomorrow. “Whatever, now help me decide what to wear, you sods.”

“Rems! Over here!” You exclaimed, standing on your tiptoes, arms up and waving in his directions. Remus smiles, maneuvering through the line of students waiting to get out of Hogwarts and to Hogsmeade. “Y/n! you look… pretty.” He blushes, drinking in the sight of you. Remus could swear on his life that he saw a light shade of pink dust your cheek as you tucked a stray hair behind your ear.

“Thank you, I like your sweater. It suits you.” You said, eyes going over his body and one of Remus’s signature sweaters. You can’t deny it; you like what you see, you were pulled from your thoughts when someone spoke.

“Oi! Get a move on you half-blood and goody-two-shoes! Holding up the bloody line is what you’re doing!” Evan Rosier, a Slytherin student complained a few feet away from you and Remus, Mulciber and Dolohov backs their fellow Slytherin and friend up. He snarls, those blokes, looks like they’ll have a new target for one of their nasty pranks.

“If I were you, I would shut my mouth.” Remus warns, standing in front of you, blocking your frame from their view.

Evan raised one eyebrow, amusement swimming in his eyes. “What are you going to do? Pesky little Gryffindor like you are always running around trying to be brave.” He taunts, moving closer to their direction.

“Rems, I’m fine. Let’s go, yeah?” She gently tugs the sleeve of his sweater, he looks down at you, his expression softening. “Alright then.” He threw one last warning look at Rosier over his shoulder; that punk needs to just wait and see what’s going to come and bite his ass.

The two of you are sitting in the Three Broomsticks, talking about basically anything under the sun. Well, you mostly talked while Remus just listens, humming and sometimes sharing his two cents on the topic you are on.

“Rems, thank you.”

Remus’ eyebrows shot up in confusion, “Thank you? What for?”

“Earlier, Evan Rosier.”

“Ah, that prick. It was nothing, y/n.” He offers a gentle smile; he wants to touch your hand that was directly across his from the table but ultimately deciding against it, the last thing he wants to do is make you feel uncomfortable.

“Thank you for being my friend. You’re an amazing person who deserves the world.” She smiles, slowly taking his hand onto hers and squeezing it tightly.

He felt a crack in his heart. “Yeah, you are too.” He managed to choke out, offering a wry smile.

Friends. Is that it? Is he just one of the many friends you have in your life? Is he a friend that will slowly drift away after you graduate from Hogwarts? Merlin, he would even count himself lucky if you invited him to be at your wedding, and if he wants to push his luck then he might even be the godfather to one of your future kids.

You furrowed your brows, “Is there something wrong, Rems?” He looks at you, quickly shaking his head. “Nothing’s wrong. Why do you ask?” You hummed, “Well, you have this kind of haunted look on you when you’re bothered about something; you’re doing it right now.”

Remus blinks, even he himself wasn’t aware of that. He closed his eyes and sighed; fuck it. He’ll push his luck to the extremes by confessing his love for you. Doesn’t matter if you see him as just a friend, you deserve to know.

“Y/n, I have to tell you something.”

“Of course. What would that be?”

“Well, I don’t know how to tell you this without being upfront about it…” He starts, you urged him to continue; well, here goes nothing.

“Y/n, I-“

“Two butterbeers, correct?”

Remus wants to pull his hair out of frustration as the server walked towards them and set down the butterbeers they ordered, interrupting his speech. You smiled, thanking them before turning to Remus, who was frowning.

“What was it you were trying to say, Rems?” You asked, sipping your butterbeer.

“I like you, a lot. Ever since we met.” He simply blurts out quickly, as if he’s scared someone is going to interrupt again. You blink slowly, setting your butterbeer down gently.

“I like you too, Remus.”

“No- you don’t understand,” He shakes his head as you furrowed your eyebrows, utterly confused.

“I fancy you, love.” He emphasizes, taking both of your hands into his large ones, looking at you straight in the eyes, completely serious. She widens her eyes ever so slightly, her heart rate speeding up a bit.

“Why didn’t you tell me? I’ve always fancied you too, Rems.”

Remus felt as if the time slowed down, his heartbeat pulsing faster, eyes blinking owlishly, his jaw slack in shock.

Did he hear that right? Please tell him that he heard that right.

“I-I… I gave you hints, love!” He sputtered, “But you’ve just ignored them every single time!” She frowns, “I didn’t notice…” Remus agreed, “Forgive me, but you were quite oblivious.” A small smile was on his face.

“You could’ve just said outright that you fancy me, Rems.” She chuckles, a faint blush on her cheeks.

“If you like me too, then why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t want to force you.” She said, looking at the beverage in her hand. His eyes softened, “Force me? To what, love?”

She sighs, looking up at him. “I didn’t want you to force yourself to try to love me just because I feel that way for you.”  Before Remus could even speak, she opened her mouth again, “I know you, Remus. You would’ve tried either way, that’s just who you are.” She chuckles, sipping butterbeer before continuing.

“You have a heart of gold, Rems. That’s one of the things I love about you.” She rubs her thumb across his scarred knuckles gently. The hairs on the back of his neck stood up, the simple and gentle touch made his spine shiver.

If this was some kind of dream, then he would be more than happy to not wake up.

“Can I kiss you?” He breathes out, making you giggle. You stood up from your seat and leaned towards him, you can feel and smell his peppermint toothpaste fanning against your lips, beckoning you closer.

“You don’t even have to ask.” You closed the distance between you and sealed both of your lips with a kiss.

[lynnie-ee]

Inktober Day 2; Cupid.

╰┈➤"Sometimes people need help to gather the courage to confess to someone...And they surely know how to encourage it. After all, who wouldn't help their sibling or son get the love of the Ramshackle Prefect?."

╰► Gender-neutral reader, scenarios, 1.9k words in total.

╰► Characters: Jade, Floyd, Lilia.

╰►Note: The prompts are based on words I found interesting and then I put them on a roulette to decide when I would write about them, lol. English is not my first language, so please let me know if there are any grammatical mistakes <3. Not proof read, I haven't written in a long time, so I apologise if anything is out of character.

╰►Masterlist / Inktober Masterlist.

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﹙𖧵ֹֺֽ໋໋݊﹚Jade Leech ❜ ˖ ࣪⊹ ִֶָ

The words “scary” and “unnerving" could be the first thing to come to your mind when you think about Jade, especially now.

You had become more attached to Floyd in the past few months thanks to Ace, as the Octavinelle second-year attended the same club as your friend, which led you to visit him a few times at Mostro Lounge, encountering Jade in the process sometimes.

At first, it was casual, a single greeting when he passed beside the prefect, that’s it.

But then, Jade noticed how unusually excited his brother seemed to be, even more than usual, and he quickly figured out what he was up to.

Jade was delighted to see his brother in good moods more frequently now, knowing that, for once, he seemed committed to dedicating time to the little Shrimpy, as Floyd called you. However, were his brother’s feelings reciprocated? Were you honest with him? Jade would never allow a magicless human to make fun of his brother, even if Floyd was more than capable of deciding that by himself.

So, one evening, as you were looking for his twin, he decided to test your intentions.

⤿

“Good evening, Prefect.”

“Ah, Jade!” The Ramshackle student replied startled, as the vicehousewarden appeared suddenly behind them, out of nowhere. Well, they were in the middle of the Mostro Lounge, so it was expected for Jade to be around, just not that close. “I was looking for Floyd.”

“I thought you’d be here for him. Then, follow me, if you will.”

“Wouldn’t it be better to wait here for him? He usually-“

“Hm, I guess my assumptions about you were wrong if you rejected my offer to see my brother.”

“Assumptions?” They questioned, tilting their head to emphasize their curiosity.

“Would you like me to talk about it here? Where so many people can hear?” The second-year questioned, a trace of amusement in his voice.

“A quiet place would be better, yeah.” (Y/n) replied quickly, sensing the direction of their conversation, this time following Jade to the back of the Mostro Lounge without complaining.

“You have feelings for my brother.” Stated the merman, as soon as they reached a secluded corner, startling (Y/n) with the bluntness of his words.

“What…what takes you to that conclusion?” The prefect questioned nervously, punching themselves mentally for their lack of confidence, a death sentence in front of a Leech twin.

“You have spent a significant amount of time here lately. Sometimes you don’t even order anything, looking content just by staying at the tables to talk to my brother. Humans can be quite predictable sometimes, with that red tone on your cheeks every time Floyd is near, you don’t fool anyone, Prefect.”

“I don’t-“

“You don’t?” Jade remarked immediately, a sly grin on his face, as he looked the Prefect more closely as he spoke. “Perhaps, then, I misunderstood the situation. Could it be that instead of being interested in my brother, you were looking forward to seeing me?” He added, his face now mere inches away from the magicless human.

Close enough for him to use Shock the Heart, now that (Y/n) was distracted-

“You’re incorrect, in that one." The Ramshackle student corrected, slowly trying to sound more confident. “But you were correct earlier. I do like your brother, is there a problem with that?” They blurted out before they could regret it.

Jade smiled even more widely, if that was even possible. This action scared the Prefect even more, if that was even possible.

“Shrimpy, what did you just say? Why are you here with Jade? I’ve looked for you everywhereeee.” Floyd's pouting voice interrupted their conversation, his figure soon appearing in the middle of them.

“How long have you been there?!” The magicless student asked trying to mask their embarrassment.

“Enough to know you like me! C’mon Shrimpy, you’ve let me alone for too long.” Floyd whined, swiftly taking the Prefect between his arms to drag them outside Mostro Lounge.

“Fufu~Seems like Shock the Heart wasn’t necessary after all.”

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﹙𖧵ֹֺֽ໋໋݊﹚Floyd Leech ❜ ˖ ࣪⊹ ִֶָ

He’s ecstatic, to say the least.

You started to see his brother more frequently after he offered you a free meal (it was one of his mushroom dishes. He used you as a lab rat, but you didn’t need to know that), which surprisingly, you liked. And then, you asked him where he got the ingredients, allowing Jade to talk for hours.

Floyd always found you interesting, but enduring Jade talking about the different types of mushrooms that could be found in Sage Island for hours? You were a tough one.

Then, Jade started to invite you to hikes frequently. And you spent time at Mostro Lounge. And you spent time at Octavinelle. And you talked to his brother in between classes.

And then, one day after he came back to his dorm after his club, he found you in their shared room as Jade showed you his collection of terrariums, and was the sign Floyd needed to know that Jade was being serious about this.

It seemed like the two of you were starting to fall for each other, which was cool and all that, but…that took too long. It was boring. Whether you were with his brother or not, it was simple.

⤿

“Ya like Jade, don’t you?” Floyd mentioned one day, as both of you walked towards the cafeteria. (Y/n) had decided to accompany Ace to the basketball club, and in the middle of it, Floyd asked them to join him to buy water at the cafeteria. Terrible choice.

“What…what did you say?” The Prefect quickly questioned, wondering if they heard something wrong.

“Yer in love with my brother or something like that?”

“What are you even saying? Haha, I think you’re misunderstanding something here…” They replied trying to look nonchalant, failing miserably as their nervous expression betrayed them immediately.

“You listened to his mushroom talk, you’re not gonna fool me into believing you did it without liking him.”

“Floyd, I-“

“You should confess. Get over it quickly.”

“Sorry? I don’t think I’m ready for-“

“What are you? A coward? Do you think my brother will say no?”

“…Maybe he will.” (Y/n) mumbled after a few seconds, as they saw there was no reason to deny their feelings, as Floyd seemed to have figured out already.

“He showed his terrarium collection, he’s gonna say yes.”

“He has shown them to other people too, you know?”

“Not the ones from his room.” Floyd replied with an obvious expression. “Just do it, Shrimpy.”

“It’s not that easy, Floyd, I’m afraid.” They confessed, sighing.

“I’d say it’s very easy, actually. Look, Jade’s there.” Pointed the second year suddenly, making the Prefect look towards the other side of the hallway, where the vicehousewarden walked calmly. “Hey, Jade, Shrimpy here wants to tell you something!” He called loudly, promptly pushing the magicless student towards his brother.

“Having Shrimpy as a sibling-in-law will be so funny~.”

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﹙⚔﹚Lilia Vanrouge ❜ ˖ ࣪⊹ ִֶָ

He’s not subtle. Like, at all.

Now, don’t be mistaken; he’d never reveal Silver’s feelings to you. He knows how to guard his son’s privacy. However, that doesn’t stop him from pointing Silver’s strong traits to you, every single time he can.

It starts small, as you both walk around the halls, passing outside the gym. Did you know physical training was Silver’s best subject? No? How strange, he thought it was nice for you to know.

Then you both greet Riddle on your way to class. He’s in the same club as Silver, you know? He’s very good a it, after all, he has such a nice physical condition, he could carry you easily if you ask him. Why would Silver carry you? No reason in particular, it was just an example, similar to the people that carry their partners, which is just another example, don’t worry.

Until that, you had just answered by nodding at his words, thinking that perhaps Lilia just held Silver in high regard, but then you decided to agree to the compliments.

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“How have you been doing in Magical Analysis? Is it too difficult for you?” Lilia asked you one day, as you both drank tea (that you offered to prepare) in the middle of the Diasomnia lounge.

“A little bit, considering that I’m magicless and all that.” Replied the Prefect without much worry.

“That’s a pity. Perhaps Silver could tutor you? He did great in his first year in the subject, in his first test he scored a-“

“Isn’t Sebek like very good at Magical Analysis? I’ve considered asking him for help but perhaps if you tell him he’d be more open to help.”

“…Maybe, he will. However, Silver is very good at teaching, I’m sure he’ll be delighted to be able to help you.”

“I don’t doubt it, after all, he’s very kind.” (Y/n) commented, sipping on their tea.

“Oh, so you think he’s kind?” The Diasomnia vicehousewarden asked, a big smile on his expression.

“…Yeah, that was what I just said.”

“What else?”

“About what?”

“About Silver, what do you think of him?”

“Well…He’s a very nice friend, easy-going, and calm. He’s one of the few people that seem normal, among all the crazy students here.” The Prefect replied honestly.

“Indeed, he’s very charming, don’t you think? Although I don’t see you often around him, I didn’t know you were friends.”

“Usually, we don’t see each other in school. But lately, we’ve talked quite a lot at night. Sometimes, he goes looking for Malleus at my dorm and we stay chatting for a while.”

“Just that?”

“Uhm, we also hang out sometimes after class, he asks me to talk to him when he gets sleepy in the afternoon. Or sometimes he invites me to help him to take care of the little animals that usually follow him.”

“Oooh~I see.” He smiled mischievously. “You talk very fondly of him, dear. Are you sure you two are just friends?”

“Of course, Lilia.” The magicless student replied quickly, chuckling.

“Are you 100% sure?” He questioned again; this time more insistent.

The Prefect remained quiet for a few seconds, surprising themselves when they felt the heat rushing to their cheeks when they thought of Silver, as handsome and gentle as he was.

‘Could it be…?'

“Cat got your tongue, Prefect?”

“No, Lilia, I was just thinking…”

“You can tell me, dear, I swear I won’t tell anyone.”

“Well, it’s just that I…I don’t know if I see him just as a friend.”

“Oh ~ tell me more.”

“Silver has been so attentive and sweet with me…It’d be hard for me not to develop feelings for him, you know?” They mumbled, shyly.

“Of course! Love appears naturally, it’s normal for you to notice until now.” Lilia replied, an overjoyed expression adorning his features. “But it can’t slip away if you don’t do anything about it, Prefect. Perhaps you should be honest with him.”

“You think?”

“I know Silver very well; he’ll listen to you and he’ll know you have good intentions.”

“You may be right, Lilia. I have to go, if you excuse me, I think he’s about to finish his club practice.”

“Good luck, Prefect, I trust you’ll do well.”

Lilia chuckled softly as he saw the Prefect leaving the dorm with a nervous expression but with so much fondness towards his son.

“Ah, young love, always a delight to see.”

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[lazycats-stuff]

Hiiii! I was wondering if u could so a batfam x deaf male reader? Where everyone in the family knows sign language and all that. But during one of Bruce's galas the reader gets kidnapped and no one's knows until Damian notices that his younger brothers not there anymore? U can decide how u wanna finish it and its completely if Ur not comfortable writing it. Also I love Ur writing 😙

Oh hell yeah. Thank you for loving my questionable writing though.

Summary: (Y/N) is deaf. That doesn't help him when he gets kidnapped.

Warnings: kidnapping, protective family, fluff I guess...

Bruce was protective of all of his children. But he was more protective of (Y/N), his youngest child. Why? The reason is very simple. (Y/N) has been deaf since birth and that made Bruce beyond protective. (Y/N)'s brothers were no better than Bruce. Of course, they knew that deaf people could function normally in society. They knew that very well.

However, problem lies in two points.

First one being that they live in Gotham City. Crime is rampant, criminals are absolutely everywhere and the fact is that you get mugged at any point during the day or night. Although most of criminal life in Gotham operates during the night, no one wants to take any chances.

And even though (Y/N) doesn't go on patrol, Bruce still worried about his youngest son. Always has and always been.

The four birds shared the same sentiment. Everyone made sure to learn sign language and how to live with a deaf person. Rules were determined, such as, if entering (Y/N)'s room, just push your hand in and then flicker the lights on and off to signalize that you are entering. Don't approach (Y/N) from behind because he would often get spooked.

(Y/N)'s own words.

The second problem lies in the last name Wayne. Bruce Wayne is a well known businessman in the world. And the world of business is like a sea full of sharks. Bruce knew that very well. One drop of blood and they would be out for you and your weaknesses. And one of those is your public image.

Bruce was a proud father, attending anything that his children might have. Anything there is. He wants to be there for his kids, sue him. He would never allow work to take him away from his children. And the way he presents himself in the public is the way he is. More often than not, he hates how many people can be ignorant about deafness.

Sure, some may be genuinely curious about it and the questions come from a genuine place of interest. Unfortunately, such people are far few in between. Bruce can sniff them out rather quickly. More often then not, they often look condescending. Which is a rather judgmental way of looking at people, yes, but it's obvious.

Whenever they had a gall, one of the boys would be with (Y/N) to translate. And despite the fact that (Y/N) can read lips, he's not a fan of that. If someone turns their head and he can't see their lips, it gets more complicated.

Even now, as they are at the gala full of people, (Y/N) stuck close to his brothers, needing a translator. Bruce and others often rotated, to make sure that (Y/N) knows what's going on and that he's in the loop. (Y/N) was happy with that he wasn't out of the loop. It's not a good feeling to be out of the loop. Hearing or not.

He signed to Jason that he was going to go to the bathroom, who nodded, sipping his drink.

Jason signed back. " Sure, go ahead. I'll be moving around so don't expect to find me here. "

(Y/N) nodded and started walking to the bathroom. Jason glanced at him for the last time before moving to the table with food, ready for a snack. He was hungry and the catering at galas is just great since rich people pay for it. AKA Bruce Wayne pays for it and he also loves good food.

As Jason went to the food table, (Y/N) was on his way to the bathroom. He was about to enter when someone grabbed him from behind, putting a cloth over his mouth. (Y/N) panicked and tried to remember the self defense that he was taught. He tried to break free from the person, but the smell of the cloth made him go out cold.

Something was off. Damian glanced around the room, trying to spot what that something could have been bothering him so much. His eyes moved around the room, trained to find anything out of the normal. Then it hit him.

Where is (Y/N)?

Damian moved around the room discreetly, trying to figure out where he went. He talked to Jason about it and Jason told him about (Y/N) going to the bathroom. But that was far too long ago... Damian now became more suspicious and worried. He was on edge. He could feel himself getting more and more restless, his mind screaming at him that something is wrong.

He quickly walked over to his family as they all took a chance to breathe on the balcony. Damian made sure that they had some sort of privacy.

" Are you alright Damian? " Bruce asked, glancing over Damian. He could feel that something is wrong with Damian.

" I'm not alright father. I can't seem to find (Y/N) anywhere. " He crossed his arms as he leaned on the railing of the balcony. Everyone tensed up at that.

" Hold on, he went to the bathroom the last time I talked to him, " Jason declared and Damian nodded.

" But it's been far too long though, " Damian countered the point.

" Did he come to anyone, at all? " Bruce asked and everyone shook their heads.

" Okay, maybe he went to his room, " Tim said, trying to provide a logical explanation. " But he would have told one of us where he would go. He would find one of us and he would tell us... " Tim muttered, now worried himself.

" Should we check the security cameras? " Dick asked, worried, but trying not to show it.

" I'll check the cameras near the bathroom. " Bruce took his phone out of his pocket and going into his security feed.

Jason remained silent, feeling guilty that he didn't notice sooner. Bruce noticed and put his hand on his shoulder. " Do not blame yourself Jason. Please. You couldn't have known. This is our home and none of us should be on guard in our own home, " Bruce murmured and Jason sighed.

Bruce brought Jason into a hug. " (Y/N)'s going to be fine. We are going to find him quickly. "

Dick and Tim furrowed their brows. " What do you mean? " Dick asked.

" You 4 have to swear to me that you won't tell (Y/N), " Bruce stepped away from Jason and everyone muttered that they won't tell.

" I put a tracker on his suit. It's a small one, " Bruce admitted and everyone was shocked by it. They knew that their suits that they wear for their vigilante activities have trackers on them, but a normal suit, for galas and other events...

" It's only when we are at galas and such. There's no tracker on him 24/7, " Bruce elaborated before his sons could accuse him of something.

" Well, we can't tell (Y/N). But lets go get (Y/N) please, " Tim said and everyone nodded.

" I'll have Alfred make something up and we'll make a story so it doesn't seem suspicious about why we didn't know (Y/N) was taken. "

And that's what happened. They concocted a story about it and once Batman dropped him off at GCPD, Bruce came in as a worried father. Media had a field day with the story, a father and son reuniting after a such traumatic event. Bruce couldn't care less about them, his sons are his priority. Screw the media.

Understandably, (Y/N) was shaken up by the entire ordeal. Anyone would be shaken up after being kidnapped in their own home, but with (Y/N) being deaf, he couldn't hear anyone walking up to him. Not to mention, they put a bag over his head. Being in the dark, not being able to hear...

It tugged at Bruce's heartstrings. The other 4 weren't immune either. Damian, the normally stoic one, was affected by that aspect. Even he saw how scary it was. Not being able to see due to the bag over your head and not being able to hear because you are deaf sounds like hell. Damian saw it as a form of torture. And in a way it is. Sensory depravation. Only being able to feel with your touch or feel vibrations, but still...

Damian still shuddered as he tried to envision it.

The other 3 shared the very same sentiment.

And even now, as (Y/N) was with them, on the couch, bundled up in blankets, sipping some herbal tea that Alfred made to calm him down. Both Bruce and Alfred were trying to calm him down too. Bruce was going to find a therapist for (Y/N), that much is sure. It would have to be someone who can sign though...

Well, he'll make sure to find one. For now, he'll focus on making sure that (Y/N) is calm enough to try and sleep. Buce knew that adrenaline was still pumping, but that it will stop soon and (Y/N) would essentially crash.

Everyone sat around (Y/N), trying to calm him and make him feel safe again. Bruce and Tim were going to see how in God's name they managed to get into the manor. This place is more safer than Pentagon, designed to keep any intruder out. And he was going to find out why they wanted to kidnap him.

The best bet was probably money, but then again, you never know. And Bruce was going to make sure that he knew why. You have to nip the problem in the bud.

[dzvelinaskebiyars]

I love your foreigner gf headcanons for Toman. Can I request the same with Hanma, Ran, and Draken please?

Thank you so much!! And ofc! Have a nice day/night<333

Hanma:

He genuinely doesn't care if you're foreign or not, really doesn't care about someone's race and etc. He dislikes everyone equally^^ but not you--someone who kicked him in the balls on their first meeting.

I feel like that's when he kinda took interest in you? So he'd try to get close to you and find out that you're foreign. Well, since he was amused by you, he'd be nice.

You: Well then, how to say "stop smoking in front of me" in Japanese?

Hanma, currently smoking:....禁煙目の前で私.

You: 禁煙目の前で私<333

He ended up helping you with Japanese.

Hanma: あなたはとても背が低いです. (you're so short).

You: Huh?

Hanma: Nothing.

You: I know "短い" means short so if you're calling me short, then fuck you.

Well, he became your first friend in Japan so maybee he's not that bad, hm?

He'd randomly call you "豪華" and when you would question it, he'd just brush it off as you hallucinating. (Tr: gorgeous)

Ran:

Let's be honest, this man has learned many languages because he wants to be foreign celebrity. So he'd be happy to speak in other language than Japanese with someone because otherwise, he might forget what he has learned.

Coming to Japan to befriend a delinquent never ever crossed your mind, not even once, but here you are, in his house, chatting with him.

"That's not right." Ran said, taking pen from you and writing down the kanji right. You let out an audible oh and thanked him, copying what he wrote.

Meanwhile he was staring at you the whole time.

「 あなたはとても美しいです」 He said. You glanced at him, confused. You're sure you heard "You're" from him but you couldn't catch what he said next. (tr: You're beautiful)

"What was that?" You asked him.

"You're working hard, that's all." He smiled at you.

"Well, of course. I must learn Japanese."

What you two didn't know was that Rindou stood behind you two, his mouth hang open in shock hearing what Ran said. He definitely was going to tease his older brother about it.

Draken:

Unlike other Toman members, Draken wouldn't introduce you to his friends. Not until you came across them. Because all of his friends are delinquents and he doesn't want to take a risk and get you involved in any way. He doesn't want you to be pressured to meet new people either. Of course, he can introduce you to Hina or Emma if you ask him tho.

Please don't even mention teaching or learning to him, he hasn't done that in decades. But still, he'd help you out with Japanese.

He knows some people aren't very welcoming to foreigners and he doesn't want you to experience any hostility just because of your nationality.

While you're learning Japanese, he's learning your mother language so it'll be easier for him to teach you and chat with you in general.

It's so sweet of him! How he even asked you out to go with him on Tanabata and other festivals, explaining their meanings to you.

He wouldn't really take risk and confess to you in Japanese, thinking you wouldn't hear him. I think rather than that, when he's ready ofc, he'll confess to you in your mother language. Be it English, Italian, Spanish, French, Tagalog, Georgian, Arabic or whatever language, he'd learn it.

♡♡♡♡

I really hope you're satisfied!