#I am a burden to my mom

[beforethepoison]

i am just waiting for a moment of suddenly courage so I can actually k1ll myself.

[bunnihearted]

🪦🩹

[pleasedontcareaboutme]

I want to be more authentic on my other social media platforms too, where irl people know me.

But I have such an intense fear of being perceived I sit. For 3 hours. On a post before posting it 😭😭 I literally just stare at it and have an anxiety attack lol.

And even then sometimes I end up deleting it.

Even though I only do it for myself and nobody really cares it's still ajajaja hard.

But I want people to see me more than a shallow human lol

And maybe, even if only one person likes my "true" self, then I'd be happy 🥲

But what if they bully me more ahhah I already am not the most well liked 🥲🥲🥲🥲

THOUGHTS GO AWAY lol 😭

[bruciemilf]

Going through the horrors (studying)

[ablednt]

Granted I have the overall geographical and cultural knowledge of a 4th grader but from what I can tell the nuclear family model really does seem to be a white colonial invention

Different cultures have different approaches but I mainly hear about either large family units where multiple generations support each other and raise their children and grandchildren together or an "it takes a village" approach where children are raised somewhat communally

And I can't really speak on it much or claim that these families were free of abuse or that children aren't often an oppressed group basically everywhere I know of but the way ownership of your children is so engrained into white society is so bizarre

Like once you notice it you can't unnotice it even the most loving well meaning parents don't know what to do about it because everyone is so isolated from their own families and their own communities so you wind up with 1-2 parents who have full legal ownership of their child and are raised in a culture where you don't have personhood until you're 18 and all attempts at self actualization before them are seen as clueless rebellion. Like our culture is so divorced from the concept that a parent is someone who is helping mentor and care for their child so they can thrive as a fellow human being and it's actually so alarming

And ik this problem isn't unique to white and colonized people but it's honestly really soothing to hear about how other cultures approach and view parenting and community as a whole and to internalize it doesn't have to be this way

[hauntedwoman]

as badly as i want to avoid my mom she is making it extremely difficult

[winterstaryu]

I said something that could have been interpreted as mean literally 3 days ago and I still can't stop thinking about it

[yourlocalxenomorph3]

i appreciate the concern anon! im mostly not serious but im also a little serious but im not gonna do anything drastic but my brain really really really thinks about doing drastic things

[nomairuins]

anyways sry its not srs eventually ill get it together . and be a person again. one day

[philosophicallie]

ok time to try to blame someone else instead of me

[jaqkiwine]

/ᐠ - ˕-マ｡˚ᶻ 𝗓

[heybaetae]

.

[bunnihearted]

🐰🌧️

[floral-hex]

Just canceled all of my future therapy appointments. Big fudgin’ bummer. Did I mention I lost my insurance? Didn’t even find out about that until the day it lapsed. Trying to find a way to fix it now, reapplying and whatnot, but ya know, it’s bureaucracy so who knows how long it’ll take. Just fingers crossed I don’t run out of meds first.

lol it’s underwater 🐠

[fecto-forgo]

obsessed w this guy who buys expensive easter eggs (like 70+ reais) n recreates them at home for. 4-10 reais.the economy man.the economy.

[three-bunnies-in-a-trenchcoat]

Isn't life just wonderful <- suffering through making a life changing decision and has no one to talk to