#I also think Eddie needs to talk more but that's the journey

[a--a---a]

for those of you writing fics or drabbles about "sob stories" plz consider dissecting why eddie says if it's between buck and christopher he'll choose his son every time. like even buck says he knows he'll pick christopher and that he's not asking him to choose. but WHY does eddie think he is? does eddie feel like he has to choose? (i mean obviously he does BUT...) does buck personify home? when eddie thinks of LA, he sees the ties he's made with his found family, but why did he specifically say between his son and BUCK? and why can't he have both? does he know that's an option?

anyway yeah if you write that plz feel free to knife my veins open and write it in my blood if need be. i just want to read it and be in pain with buddie. ty

[lover-of-mine]

Hi, welcome to blue and red and parenting in 911.

Let's start with the easy to track stuff. For me that usually means looking at madney, mostly because we watched every step of the relationship unfold, so a lot of the patterns go back to them or are established with them. But the combo is present when they talk about wanting kids someday in 301, and when they find out they are pregnant in 318 and 806.

But the combo is explicitly established at the beginning of s3. 301 with the madney conversation and the bathena conversation at the hospital about not wanting more kids. 303 with buddie and the "we already have a kid" conversation. And 304 with Henren and the "having more kids will affect our family in more ways we expected"

But as with any color metas I write, every element of the scene matters, so we can go back a little bit more to 218 when Henren decide they want more kids.

The blue and red ends up attached to henren's journey into fostering and eventually getting Mara. For instance, being the color in 311 when they get Nia and 705 when they are trying to get through to Mara.

So, we established this is used with outfits and with other elements of the scene, right? So let's get into the fun stuff.

I was watching 313 yesterday and I was very 👀 about Michael and Bobby and the whole thing with Harry and the trip. Because Michael is in this reddish color and Bobby is in a neutral green. BUT when they are talking in the end about how Michael wants Bobby to be a father to Harry if he ends up unable to, Bobby suddenly has a bunch of blue around him. It's also the moment Michael's shirt looks the most red.

Another key thing with Bobby is during 516. That episode is the episode May says Bobby is her dad too. And she starts the episode in this sweater. Yes, there are other colors in it, but the bag, the belt, all add to May herself being the blue and red. Mostly blue since above we put Bobby as the blue parent.

And May is wearing the blue uniform in that episode and that leads to the scene where she calls Bobby her dad.

Something 911 occasionally does is put the sirens in one color when convenient, this is one of those moments. The sirens in this scene only flash red. So we have both of them in blue uniforms bathed in red light.

Something else that happens in that episode is the way Bobby's suspenders are clearly setup in a way to add red to him.

But Anna how do you know that's on purpose?

Well, everyone else who is wearing the suspenders has the yellow part showing. And we have a lot of people with the suspenders walking around that scene, so Bobby's being mostly red is fully on purpose.

So the combo is present when Bobby promises to do his best to be a father to Harry and when May explicitly acknowledges Bobby as her father.

So now let's talk Buck and Christopher. I made a post about this the other day but let's remake my point.

The tsunami is the event that turns Buck into a father, right? I feel like we can all agree that the thing there is to show Buck that he does in fact love Chris as if Chris is his.

So, they start out with Buck in pink.

Then the tsunami hits effectively making Buck's shirt red.

The tsunami literally turns Buck red. Honestly, this blows my mind every time I think about it. But there's more attached to this arc.

When Buck is searching for Chris, he is white. But he is carrying a piece of Chris that happens to add red to him, in a similar way that the show did with Bobby in 516.

Eddie has been blue the whole time this is happening because of the uniform, so the red ends up being a bit more symbolic, because Buck was killing himself trying to find Chris, and when he finds Eddie he needs to accept the fact that he failed. And he hands the glasses back to Eddie almost in a defeated fashion, because at this point Buck is basically putting them both in the worst scenario a parent can be in. In his mind, he doesn't deserve that piece of Chris.

But that's when Chris shows up. In red.

At this point, Chris himself ends up being that symbol.

Eddie is also holding blue gloves throughout this whole interaction.

And all of this leads us to the introduction of buddie's parenting maroon. This arc has Buck moving in shades of red until the moment Eddie tells him there's nobody else he trusts with Chris more. Clearly in blue and red.

The buddie parenting maroon shows up a few more times, on Eddie at the end of 318 when Chris is going to camp even though he was conflicted.

On Buck during 414 when he steps in to take care of Chris.

On Eddie again in 710 when Chris leaves, again both of them are blue and red here.

So yeah, personally, I think this is a very well established color combo lol.

Also, final addition. Eddie's panic attack about someone assuming Ana is Chris' mother? Same combo. But then the idea is instantly shut down by making it a trigger for Eddie.

Anyway, that's all for today, if you read this I love you 💜

[firewasabeast]

Imagine. You're on your six month anniversary date with your boyfriend. You buy him lakers tickets, a cute callback to how you got together. He doesn't get you anything, but that's okay, since seeing his beautiful smile is enough.

Then a girl comes up and flirts with him. He doesn't flirt back, but he also doesn't say "I have a boyfriend." Well, he's a bit of an idiot. You can talk about this later.

Then he asks you if you're attracted to girls. You're not, so you say so, they bring up your ex-fiancée. He practically goes into shock. That's weird.

Then when you go over to his house to stop before the movie date, he asks to talk. Okay. Maybe he wants to apologize for his weird behavior at the date.

But, no. He's telling you that he dated your ex-fiancée after you broke up with her. Wow. Okay.

And then he asks you to move in. After everything that happened at the date, what would you say?

“Peace out, bro” ✌🏻

That’s why (I think) I’ve said before that I don’t blame Tommy at all for looking like a deer in the headlights and then bowing out (if I didn’t write it here, I’ve thought it a lot). That’s also why I’ve said (thought?) the writing really sucks, because you may feel a little bad for Buck but you feel really bad for Tommy. Buck comes off as a little immature and unthoughtful throughout the whole thing. The whole “it would be our right to get married because of brave people like you” nonsense was so unbelievably cringe. I mean, I’m glad they didn’t make Tommy out to be some villain, but they also made Buck look… stupid. And I’m not blaming Oliver or Oliver’s acting choices. It’s 100% the writers and Tim’s fault.

Buck is a main. We should feel the most pain for the main. We should be left wondering how Buck is going to deal with the breakup, how he’s going to learn and grow from it. We should be getting him talking to Bobby, who tells him “Whoa! Maybe you should have tried for an I love you before a move in with me?” We should have Eddie telling Buck to call him, Hen asking him if he saw Tommy as his boyfriend/partner, or a hero who blew his world open. We should see Buck, at this point in his journey, making the decision to go try again and see Tommy for who he really is, not the calm, cool, collected guy everyone pins him as. That’s where the show should be directing us.

Instead I’m far more concerned with what Tommy is doing, how he’s feeling, what/who made him feel like he was unworthy of having good things. I want to see him get angry and tell Buck that in six months they never discussed anything real. They never really learned one another. How’d they go so long without discussing exes? Why does Buck seem more infatuated with him than anything else?

I’ve seen Buck go through countless relationships. Seen him do the same things over and over again and never really grow or learn anything of value from it. I don’t need to see it again.

[buddiebeginz]

There's been a lot of discussion lately about when will Eddie come out and when Buddie canon will happen. I think a lot more people are feeling optimistic that it actually will happen now so the conversation has shifted into people being worried how this is all going to play out. I've seen people saying that if Eddie comes out and Buddie is fully confirmed this season (i.e. they confess their feelings/ there's a kiss) that would be way too fast. I have some issues with that line of thinking though.

For starters after Buck came out in season 7 we had a lot of new people join fandom (even more join during the summer hiatus), which I'm glad for all the new people who have found 911 particularly because the majority are now rooting for Buddie. Still I feel like a lot of the newer fan's opinions (on this topic) are being heard over some of us who have been in fandom for years.

I'm not saying if you're a newbie that your opinions on the show don't matter but I do think you should take the time to listen to those of us who have been around longer. The fact is if us long time Buddie fans hadn't been rooting for this ship for years we wouldn't even be as close to them becoming canon as we are. Buck likely wouldn't have had his bi awakening if not for us either. We've supported the show and pushed them for years to give these characters the storylines they deserve. That should matter when you're talking about something like how and when Buddie canon will happen.

I understand that people want Buddie to get together in just the right way but I think we all need to realize there is no one right way this will happen. We need to make peace now before it happens that there will be things about them coming together we won't expect even things we may not exactly like. All that matters is they finally get to take their relationship to that next level. That both Buck and Eddie get to realize their person their soulmate has always been right beside them. The other mains have had their person for years it's beyond time for Buck and Eddie to (consciously fully) have that too.

-----

I've seen people say that Eddie deserves a long journey to figuring out his sexuality and he needs to work on his mental health before being with Buck. And while I do think Eddie deserves more focus and screen time I don't see 911 doing a long drawn out thing with him. 911 typically does smaller 1-3 ep arcs for their characters. There's also the fact that they've been dropping hints for Eddie's coming out these past two seasons. Ones I'm positive they will connect back to other things throughout the series, like why it never worked out with him in his relationships with women.

I'm also personally not a fan of the logic that someone needs to do all these things to change themselves to be ready for love. Buck and Eddie have seen each other through their best and their worst. The show has literally made it a point to tell you that's what love is on numerous occasions. They said that love is about stepping into someone's mess with them. Why is it that Bobby didn't need to be a perfect person before he was worthy of Athena's love? Go back and watch season 1 Bobby was not in a good place when they got together. He was getting better but he was still struggling and up until the end of the season was still thinking about ending his life. But we see Athena "step into the mess" with him. She starts by going to church with him and we see them in s2 (early on in their relationship) talk about his past at different times.

I just feel like this fandom sometimes holds Eddie to unfair standards. He's been struggling for the past couple of seasons but I honestly think we're going to find out in 8b that it's connected to him having not felt able to live his truth. We saw in 806 that Eddie is starting to embrace joy and taking steps to fully be himself. That he's starting even in small ways to take ownership of what he wants and doing things for himself not because he feels obligated to.

I think him going back to Texas is not just to get Chris but the shows way of giving him a rebirth of sorts. They're bringing him back to where he's from and it's where I think Eddie is going to realize who he is and what he wants (Buck) and that him and Chris don't belong in Texas they belong in LA with Buck and the rest of their found family. And this time Eddie will get to make the decision to leave not based on fear or desperation or running away from his life but based on knowing where he truly belongs.

I know there's also a worry that if Eddie comes out in 8b it will feel rushed but the length of the story being told shouldn't be the main concern it should be how well the show tells it.

They could have him realize his feelings for Buck (because I do think him figuring out his sexuality is going to be tied to that) while he's still in Texas. That could be one whole episode just Eddie (like they did for Bobby in s7) or have it play out over a few eps. Then Eddie comes home and Buddie canon happens by the end of s8. I also feel like people are forgetting we have quite a few eps for 8b left to go so it's not like Eddie coming out and Buddie canon are both going to happen in 1 or 2 eps right after the other. It's very likely Eddie realizing his feelings will happen earlier and Buddie canon will happen in one of the last eps of the season.

Also even if they have Eddie come out in one ep that doesn't mean it's the end of him ever talking about his sexuality or facing any struggles with it. We haven't seen Buck facing much struggle when it comes to his sexuality but I think it will be different with Eddie. Even if Buddie officially get together in s8 in s9 we could still see things like Eddie having mixed feelings over being out especially when it comes to stuff like pda. Maybe we could even see Eddie talking to the priest again. Eddie coming out and Buddie canon happening doesn't mean it's the end of Eddie's sexuality journey it's just the beginning.

Like I said before we need to make peace that every part of these stories isn't going to make everyone happy but I think the last thing we should be doing when Eddie comes out and Buddie canon happens is look for reasons to criticize the show for how it happens. They will inevitably receive hate from bummys and people who will accuse them of making the show too gay. We can't add to that by complaining that a storyline didn't happen in a perfect way. If they actually finally go there with these characters we need to celebrate the show and be louder with our praise than any bs they'll get.

-----

On the subject of Buddie I've seen people say that if they confess their feelings for one another by the end of 8b it will feel rushed that the general audience won't get what's happening because the show hasn't set the groundwork for their relationship. I feel like I'm seeing this argument more from newer fans which I guess makes sense because to you it probably does seem like everything is moving fast. But for those of us who have watched Buck and Eddie's relationship develop over years and years this has all been a long long time coming in fact it's beyond overdue.

Some of you need to remember that Buck was supposed to come out in s4 (the shooting was likely to be the catalyst to him realizing his feelings for Eddie) and Eddie in s5 which means Buddie canon was likely to happen that same season. How can s8 be too soon when they were supposed to get together three seasons ago? They have literally been through almost everything Madney and Bathena have been through or some variation thereof. If Buck and Eddie were a straight couple they would have been married already. Buck and Eddie have spent 7 years building their relationship. Building a life and family together. Them finally admitting they're in love with each other is simply the natural progression their relationship should be taking from best friends (that have always been more than friends) to lovers. I think another reason people question if it's too fast for this to happen in s8 is because a queer couple like this has never happened on a show like 911 before. There's been plenty of slow burn straight couples. Which is why I'm positive if Buck and Eddie were a guy and a girl there wouldn't be this big debate over if it should happen now, people would be saying what the hell is this show even doing? Why haven't they kissed already?

-----

A big point about all of this that I feel like is being left out of the discussions is that 911 is made in the US and is first and foremost made for US audiences. I bring this up because as someone who is from the states it's very apparent there's a huge uprising of anti lgbtq rhetoric and legislation here right now. I know it probably seems unfathomable to some people that the US government could do something like ban lgbtq people from TV but there's already been pushes to ban things like lgbtq books on a state level so it could happen. But what is more likely is networks and companies have already started to capitulate to trump to protect themselves and their money. We have no way of knowing how bad things will continue to get with trump and how a network like ABC will behave in the future. We don't have the luxury to sit back and say let's wait until s9 or 10 for Buddie to officially get together when there's no certainty of what will even be happening in the US by the time those seasons are made.

Connected to that same topic of what's going on not just in the US but in other countries too. This attack on lgbtq rights means it's more important than ever for Buddie to finally be together. I know that 911 has always had queer characters and ships and they should always be respected for the important representation they've given on the show since day one (particularly characters like Henren and their family) but Buck and Eddie are ground breaking in a way we really haven't seen on TV before. Two men who are best friends and who have come out later in life. Who have fallen for each other over years of building their relationship. Who have spent years raising their son together. Who are an interracial couple. Buck and Eddie in a loving relationship together as a family with Chris is vital representation the world needs to see right now. That lgbtq people need to see. We need to see more depictions of queer joy in the face of all of this hate.

-----

I see people keep pushing back the time frame of when Buddie should officially get together when we were in s7 people were saying s8 now I've seen them say s9, I've even seen some people recently say s10. I need some of you to realize 911 is a network TV show and that this isn't the golden age of TV anymore. TV shows get canceled left and right sometimes for no reason at all. 911 itself was canceled from Fox after s6 not because no one was watching it but because Fox felt it was too expensive to make. 911 is a super successful show one that will likely go on to it's 9th season and that's an amazing thing when a lot of shows now barely even make it past like two seasons. But because 911 is so many seasons in and is so costly not just to make but also for the cast that means there's always a risk that it could get canceled again. I hope that 911 goes on for at least 10 more seasons but we can't guarantee that at all. The more we push Buddie back the more we run the risk of them not happening at all.

The other thing is I don't want Buddie canon happening at the end of their last season. I want to see how Buck and Eddie's relationship develops and changes once they're officially together. I want to see all the good and bad stuff they go through like moving in together and telling everyone (especially Chris). I want to see how their parents react. How that changes things for them at work. They deserve to have an epic love story just as grand as any of the other main couples have had.

To add to the point of us not knowing how long the show may go on for we also have no idea how long all of the actors plan to stay with the show. I'm not sure how long the contracts they've all signed are for at this point but they've all been with the show a very long time. It's clear they all love working together and I can't see any of them giving that up right now but that could change. We're lucky that Oliver and Ryan have continued to stay with the show after this many years but we can't guarantee they will stay forever. Eventually they could want to go off and work on something else or just get tired of playing the same character. The fact is everything is in the right place at the right time for Buddie canon to happen now. It has to happen now or it may not happen at all.

Also as much as some of you want them to drag out Buck and Eddie getting together I think you underestimate how long the fanbase is willing to hang on for. Like I said some of us have been waiting for Buddie to happen for years we're tired. I almost stopped watching the show after s6 I was that fed up with how they handled things. I'm positive if something doesn't change by the end of s8 that there are people who will stop watching.

I know some have said they want to see Buck and Eddie realizing their feelings and going into s9 pinning. I don't think the show needs to drag out their will they/won't they any longer. I've seen some people say well Buddie hasn't really had a will they/won't they because it wasn't explicit in the show. Buck and Eddie have never been written as just friends. Go compare them to Chim and Hen's friendship. There has always been more there between them always. Again if this was a straight couple people would be complaining constantly wondering why they weren't together yet. They don't have to be kissing for it to be a slow burn. They've done everything but though. I mean what do you call that scene in the kitchen in 3x09? Eddie literally put Buck in his will. He told Buck he trusts him above anyone else with Chris. Buck sobbed when he knew Eddie was going to be okay after he was shot (he's never reacted that way over anyone else on the show getting hurt). Eddie counted the seconds when Buck wasn't breathing. These two men love one another they just haven't admitted it yet.

We don't need more time to tell this story. 911 hasn't always gotten it right (see the weird Vertigo story) but when it's good it can be fcking amazing. The shooting eps are some of my fav eps of tv ever and not just of 911. I have faith in Tim and the show. Tim has wanted to put Buck and Eddie together for a long time and I know he knows he only has one chance to tell this story and get it right. I have faith that him and the actors and writers will do the story justice however it gets told. I know they know it means a lot to so many people. And you know the truth is we're lucky that our ship is even at this point. That we can all debate about how Buddie canon should happen because we're all so sure now that it is in fact happening. Cause the show was very close to ending on a finale that had Buck and Eddie ending up with other partners. Buddie would have only been able to continue to live on in fanon. Instead I truly believe we are months away from the show making history.

[superblysubpar]

<- part six | part eight -> | series masterlist

chapter summary: No more bets.

the song: Read Your Mind by Sabrina Carpenter

also for your listening pleasure: Girl Can't Help It by Journey, Open Your Heart by Madonna, U Got The Look by Prince, and The Lady in Red by Chris de Burgh

5,328 words | please see masterlist for gen warnings / brief descriptions of scars-previous head injury / SPICE/SMUT - really just some dirty talk and a teensiet tiniest start to oral (reader receiving) | my blog is 18+

Hawkins, Indiana - the past

  His hand was in yours, and then it wasn’t. 

  “Well, well, well,” a voice sneered in front of you as you blinked at the boy who just dropped your hand at the sound of it. “What do we have here, Stevie?”

  A group of boys around your age leaned against a falling apart fence just outside of the ride, eyes surveying you up and down, then looking at Steve Harrington standing next to you. The leader of the pack a face full of freckles and a grin that made your stomach unsettled when he pointed it at you and took a step forward.

  “I’m Tommy, and you,” he grinned wider, like if he showed off more teeth, he’d placate you into thinking you enjoyed his company, “Well, you must be new to Hawkins. Think I’d remember a face like yours.”

  “Knock it off Hagan,” Steve grit out of his teeth, a fist clenched at his side. 

  “I’m…I’ll…” you stuttered out at the boy named Tommy, backing away and looking at Steve as you did. “It was…I’ll see you around?”

  You scrambled away from the boys as Steve took a step towards you, but Tommy’s voice rang out, making his head turn. 

  “Does Harrington have a little girlfriend? Gonna share all the juicy details with us, Stevie?” 

  “What? No!” He answered too quickly, cheeks pink, no longer looking at you. “She’s just some stupid girl, I got stuck with her on the ferris wheel…”

  You didn’t stick around to hear more, swiping at your wet cheeks with the back of your hand. 

  Glittery green and gold smeared across it, freshly smudgable after Steve Harrington held your hand until it was over. 

A house on Cornwallis Street - Sunday

  Your hands shifted on the steering wheel, even though the car was in park. Clammy and shaking as you rubbed them on your denim shorts and took a deep breath. With your window rolled down you couldn’t help but smile at the sound of Journey coming from the backyard, the large splash that followed the shout of ‘Don’t you dare Henderson!’. Peals of laughter and the distinct smell of something grilling only added to elements encouraging you to join them. 

  But you were still sitting in your car. 

  You didn’t question it, when after the party last night, Eddie didn’t drive you home, but to the shop, dangling your keys in front of a shocked face as he proclaimed it was finally fixed.

  “But…I didn’t pay you, I thought you couldn’t…” 

  Eddie had waved you off and smiled, “I’ve been working a lot.” He dropped the keys in your lap and grinned wider, “Besides, Harringon’ll be paying me three hundred bucks tomorrow.”

  You looked down at your thighs, thinking about who’s hands had just been pushing them apart a few minutes ago as Eddie quietly probed, “Right?”

“Of course.” You nodded, telling yourself that technically you and Eddie had won the bet.

  Nobody had slept with anyone. 

  Which is what you tell yourself again as you take another deep, bravery seeking breath and step out of your car. 

  Each step on the sidewalk then up the driveway is a little easier, your chest feeling a little lighter as the laughter and music only gets louder.

  But then you see the sign. 

  The same color of the suit you have in your bag.

  The same color he told you he can’t concentrate when you wear it. 

  Bright, bold, outlining four white letters.

  SOLD. 

  You’re still looking at it when the door swings open, Robin greeting you, dripping wet from the pool and a slice of watermelon in her hand.

“Finally! I’m outnumbered, and Max is too busy canoodling with Lucas and I need more girl power!”

  She grabs your arm and pulls you into the Harrington’s foyer as a louder call of, “I told you, as soon as Lucas apologizes for what he did-“

  “And I told you, that I cannot apologize for something if I don’t know what I’m apologizing for!”

  The pair walk out of a room on one side of the foyer as they argue, Max mumbling under her breath as they exit your sights and into the den.

  “You know exactly what you did.”

  Robin rolls her eyes and points up the stairs, “This downstairs bathroom is all packed up and,” she makes quotes with her fingers around the watermelon as she recites, “ ‘It’s cleaned and if any of you idiots fuck it up, you’re dead’ , but there’s one by Steve’s room, change and come help me seek vengeance on the boys!”

  She’s gone as fast as she arrived, the silence of the house now overpowering, but at least it gives you space to take a moment to breathe and collect your thoughts.

  Steve’s moving. 

  Why didn’t he tell you?

  Your fingers glide on the wood banister as you climb the stairs, something sitting heavy in your gut from the more important question that’s gnawing at you.

  Why does it matter that he didn’t? 

  Once you find the bathroom, your fingers tug on red nylon and strings. The suit you rummaged around for in your drawer this morning pointing out the glaringly obvious answer. It matters he didn’t tell you because-

  It was a good suit, that was the only reason why it was picked for today.

  Not because of where you were wearing it.

  Not because of the boy who lived there. 

  Because he definitely still does live there, at least for the time being.

  It’s easy to spot his room when you exit the bathroom, bare feet padding across hard woods as you tug the hem of your white tshirt over your hips a little lower. Worried you shouldn’t be walking around the house so uncovered despite the fact that you’re about to be even more so outside in the pool, when you catch your reflection in the mirror above his dresser. 

  The room is in shambles, half packed you assume. Boxes open, and only half filled, litter the floor, the white plaid wallpapered walls bare, whatever hung on the nails left behind now packed away. Your fingers linger on the top of the dresser, thumb catching on his watch, a Polaroid of him and Robin, the worn brown leather of his wallet. A tight squeeze pulls at something in your chest when the slip of paper with the name ‘Brit’ and a heart shifts beneath it. 

  You can’t help but wonder if he called that number that night like he said he would. 

  Wonder if he took her out to a movie, held her hand, let everyone know that Steve Harrington was on a date with her.

  Your bag drops on his bed that’s unmade with sheets that match the walls as you wonder if she was here too. As you wonder how many other girls have been in this room, this bed. 

  A loud shout outside, just below his window makes you jump, pulling you out of the spiral of doubt you’ve fallen into and down the stairs. 

  The cream carpet is plush beneath your bare feet, the framed photos are gone, the desk as well, so nothing stands between you and the sliding glass doors out to the pool.

  It’s a different view than the last time you were here. The bright turquoise littered with even brighter inflatables and swimsuits. It’s warm, it’s light, it’s loud, as bodies splash in it and compete with the radio playing top hits for the loudest thing. Eddie’s shaking his curls out back and forth all over Robin who’s shrieking and running past him. 

  The thought of stepping outside and arriving late has you turning into the kitchen, searching for something your hands can fiddle with before joining the party. 

  Which is how Steve Harrington’s lungs finally give out, and he dies. 

  He knows he’s not actually dying, but he’s sure that the process has to feel eerily similar to this.

  He rounded the corner to find his fridge door opened, the glow of the interior light silhouetting around your curves hidden under a white shirt making his breath stutter in his chest. And as you bend at the waist, red fabric cut high and only climbing higher, reveals the perfect swell of your ass and his lungs fail to function, like one’s collapsing because he’s been shot, or he’s taking on water and they don’t know to expel the air anymore. 

  “Jesus Christ.”

  It slips out of him much like the yelp the words startle out of you, the shoot up of your body involuntary, causing your head to smack into the top of the fridge and a litany of curses to tumble out of your lips. 

  Steve rushes over as you hold your head and spin, blinking and looking dizzy.

  “Shit, shit, sorry.” He’s across the room in seconds, hands cupping your cheeks and tilting you gently while his eyes focus on your forehead, inspecting. He frowns and moves to the left slightly, towards the sink,  though he leaves one of his hands in contact with your skin. 

  The furrow of his brow deepens as he dampens a towel and you try to breathe out of your nose and in with your mouth so you don’t focus on how his normal smell is stronger with his shirt off and mixed with sunscreen and chlorine that clings to his skin. Skin that shines with a sheen from each, that’s somehow not gross, but tantalizing. So much of that skin on display revealing more freckles than you can fathom counting. Skin that looks more tan from the dark chest hair curled against it or the swim trunks that sit low on his hips. 

  Steve looks at you with raised eyebrows and you realize he’s asked a question and you absolutely didn’t hear it. 

  “Um,” you swallow, your tongue taking up too much room in your mouth, “Wh-what?”

  Steve’s lips twitch as he stands fully in front of you again, damp cloth raised as he whispers, “Something distracting you, honey?”

  Your throat has something stuck in it, and no amount of clearing it seems to fix the problem. You focus on the freckle just to the left of his lips instead of his smug eyes as you admit, “Can’t concentrate when you wear that color.”

  The reward of his low laugh and smile has you wondering if someone hand sculpted his lips and cupid’s bow. 

  “I’ll be sure to wear it every chance I get just to torture you then,” he murmurs while fingers adjust your chin into the light. Your back rests against the center island, legs sandwiched between his spread ones so he can raise the cloth to your skin, apologizing with his eyes as he tacks on, “Only fair, since you woke up and decided evil today.”

  The damp material of his swim trunks sends a shiver up your spine when it hits your thighs, and your hands grab his waist in a wince when the cloth makes contact with your still fairly fresh head wound. You’re in a staring contest with a gold chain around his neck as you fib, “This is the only swimsuit I own. Just happens to be red.”

  Steve finishes with your forehead, but two fingers curl under your chin and lift so you have to look at him as he speaks through a smirk.

  “You’re pretty cute when you lie.”

  “Come on Steve,” you whisper, fingers curling into his hips without thought, “You’re better than cheesy lines and rookie moves like this. Besides, the bet’s over. We can go back to hating each other now.”

  He shakes his head, nose bumping yours as he does and he exhales, “Never hated you.”

  Your swallow is loud as he leans closer, one hand on your hip and fingers playing with the so to speak fire of the strings holding your suit together as you offer, “Despised?”

  Another shake of his head, another step closer so your lower halves are pressed together and your eyelashes are fluttering. Your head falls back with a gasp as his mouth trails along your jaw, hot breath and wet lips against it as you stutter out, “De-detest?”

  He responds into your skin, just below your ear, something that sounds like the word, “Never.”

  His name leaves you breathlessly as his tongue lightly licks down the side of your neck, lips following in a delicate brush. 

  “Steve-”

  He hums into your collar, nose dragging around the curve of it while your hands grip his sides. “Stop saying my name like that honey, or I’m gonna get down on my knees and make you say it much,” he nips at your earlobe, “Much, louder.”

  The space between your legs throbs, thighs push even tighter together at the thought of Steve’s mouth there. 

  “Steve,” you scold, cheeks warm, body even more so in all the places it touches his. 

  “Baby,” he groans, nose knocking your cheek, “What did I just say?”

  He starts to lower himself, hands drifting so too, on the outside of your thighs. Brushing bare skin and aching to push it further, cup your ass and roll your hips against his. Especially when your fingers hold his jaw in place so he has to look at you. Only slightly distracted by how kissable your lips are as they say, “You’re moving.”

  Steve shakes his head no and you laugh again and he wonders how many more times he can make that sound come out of you. 

  “Harrington, there’s literally a sold sign in your front yard.”

  He leans in closer, unable to resist the chance to taste your lips again, to feel their lingering sting against them all day. He’s got this insane thought that he wishes you were wearing lipstick, so it could be smeared against him, marking up his mouth and neck, shit, even his dick, so everyone knows he’s yours, it’s yours.  

  “You worried I’m gonna be too far away?” He somehow manages to ask through the fog of images of your lips surrounding his cock, big eyes blinking at him as you-

  “I’m actually worried it isn’t far enough,” you swallow around the tight feeling in your chest.

  His forehead knocks yours, hands squeeze your waist and then climb higher on your curves as he tsks, “Even cuter. You gotta quit lying baby.” But he relents some of the upperhand, the thought of you being worried about him leaving making him admit, “I’m crashing at Robin’s for a bit. And we’re trying to save up for a place together.”

  “Oh,” you nod, distracted by the way his nose traces the bridge of yours, how his eyelashes flutter and the freckles on his cheeks stand out more from a morning in the sun as he does. “Th-that’s good.”

  “Yeah?” The corner of his lips rising in a smile making them brush yours. 

  “Mhm,” you hum, “So you can take Brit on that date still.”

  “Who?” He blinks, cheeks turning pink as your fingers scrape up his stomach and through his chest hair. 

  “Brit,” your eyebrows raise, “Smells like peaches, and giggles and dots her eyes with hearts? The picture perfect girl to take out around town and proudly hold hands with?”

  “Again,” Steve leans the few centimeters closer, whispering against your lips, “Who?”

  You push at his chest, as much as it pains you to do so, needing the distance from the intoxicating mouth that smells like mint and lemonade. But

Steve remains strong in his position, fingers curl around your ear and hold your neck in place gently as he speaks like each word might spook you into running.

  “I’m staying in Hawkins. I have no idea who you’re talking about. The bet is over. Can you stop being so stubborn and let me kiss you like I’ve been wanting to since we were twelve?”

  Your heart rumbles low and slow, like thunder rolling in, it cracks in your chest like lightening hit it. Every ounce of your body is buzzing, like the strike tore your body in two. One part that can’t believe you’re hearing him say it and another that wants to run even though you know it doesn’t strike the same place twice. The fear of being caught in the storm with no way out has you stalling. 

  “Ask me nicely.”

  Steve laughs, and you wonder how you never noticed how much you like making that sound bubble out of him. 

  Or how much you like the way he licks his lips before he says something important. 

  “Please,” he murmurs against your mouth, “Can I kiss you?”

  Your lips part the same time a shriek calls from the den, “Steve! The food is burning!”

  He curses under his breath, hand grabbing yours as he pulls you through the kitchen and into the den. 

  His frown only grows as the smell of burning food does when the two of you exit the sliding door. He tugs you with him across the warm pavement of the patio, the cool summer breeze has goosebumps arriving on your legs as he shouts at the curly haired boy fanning a smoking grill.

“Henderson! You had one fucking job, man! These aren’t just burning they’re-“

  “Scorched,” Lucas supplies around a cough, smacking the air with his hat. 

  “Torched,” Mike pipes up, squinting and pinching his nose closed.

  “Dead,” El delivers morosely.

  Will snorts and covers his mouth and Max mutters under her breath, “Imbeciles.” 

  But then she’s smiling at you.

  Then they’re all smiling at you, even Eddie and Robin who stand just beyond them, staring at Steve and yours intertwined hands. 

  The attention on it makes your hand feel too heavy in his and you go to slip it out, but Steve only squeezes it tighter, waving his other at them, “Take a picture, it’ll last longer. Now get lost, or I’m not making more and you can eat these disgusting things.”

  The “kids” take off and Steve turns to you, thumb swiping over the back of your hand, cheeks pink and swallowing loudly. “Um, about my really nicely asked question that was rudely-“

  “Yes.”

  The just as interrupted response stuns him as much as it does you. But when he smiles, and takes your cheeks in both of his hands, and leans in slowly, you’re sure the answer was the right one, the storm clouds dissipate, the threat of another crack gone. 

  This kiss, is like rain. 

  The good kind of rain. Slow. Steady. Steve’s lips capture yours sure, calmly, breathing out just as the pair of his mold around your top one. He holds them through an exhale against your cheek as your hands fall to his chest naturally. You can feel the thud of his heart beneath your palm as his mouth parts to do it again, deeper, stronger. Each beat against your skin the rain hitting a window until it’s so natural, so steady, it’s a simple background noise. 

  It’s only when loud whoops and whistles break the calm that you hear yours in your ears and feel his heart again, the calm disrupted. Your cheeks warm beneath his palms as he kisses you again, a chaste and over too quick peck around a smile. 

  That pesky thing is still stuck in your throat, suddenly unsure how limbs and words and human things work anymore. You stumble a step back and trip on a pool noodle when your stomach flutters with a swarm of butterflies intent on trying to escape. He catches your waist before you fall as you gesture to the water, “Alright, well, that pool’s not gonna swim in itself.”

  Steve smiles, but he narrows his eyes, squeezing at the outside of your thighs, “Honey, I thought we were done being mean to each other.”

  Your eyes blink at him, confused, butterflies constructing a roller-coaster in your stomach now as well, as you ask, “How is me swimming being mean?”

  “Kissing me like that then parading around in a little red bikini?” He swallows as his fingers play with the strings of said suit, whispering, “Mean. Incorrigible, baby.”

  This feels surreal, his hands on you, calling you baby while your friends are only a few feet away and absolutely watching. Even more so when you whisper, “Big brain word.”

  Steve taps your chin, lifting it as he asks, “What’s my prize?”

  Looking into Steve’s, Buttercup’s description of Westley’s eyes being like the sea after a storm can’t help but float through your mind. But Steve’s are a lot more like the forest after one. Wet and darkened earth soaking up all it was just given, richer in color and waiting to be explored. 

  “What do you want?” 

  Steve grins, his mouth parts, but then you’re both being drenched with water, two buckets dumped over your heads as you shout in protest against the cold. 

  Robin and Max yell something about the fire in the kitchen being too hot and they needed to put it out as they run away from you both with laughter. 

  You peel off the white shirt that clings to your body now as you mumble something about payback. Steve groans at the reveal of your body in only the suit. It’s easy to look over your shoulder as you walk away from him and ask, “Tell me later?”

  Even easier to shove a grinning Eddie towards the pool as you walk past and mumble, “Shut up.”

  He grips at your shoulder as he flails, pulling you in with him, your double splash drowning out your shriek and the beginning of Madonna’s Open Your Heart booming out of the stereo. 

  When you resurface, swiping water from your eyes and laughing, you turn to find Steve again and aren’t surprised when he’s already looking at you. Your arms rest on the ledge when you swim up to the side and mock his voice, calling up to him.

  “Take a picture, it’ll last longer!”

  He sticks his tongue out at you as you laugh and swim away, but he can’t help but wonder where he packed his Polaroid, and if he can get you alone long enough to snap several his eyes only photos. 

  He’s still thinking it, later, as the sun inches closer to the other side of the sky, and you’re relaxed on a lounger next to Robin. 

Eyes hidden from him behind sunglasses, hands resting on your stomach, brushing back and forth over your skin as you roll your neck. 

  Prince’s U Got The Look fills the now much quieter backyard, the kids all having disappeared under the excuse of getting movie snacks and a video rental from Keith an hour ago. Robin’s voice interrupts the lyrics with, “How much you wanna bet they’re at the arcade and they aren’t coming back with the snacks?”

  You groan and sit up, “No more bets. But,” a sigh leaves you, “Yeah. I’ll go order a pizza? Steve’s got a billion contraband rental’s downstairs too. I’m sure there’s something halfway decent in there.”

  “Ha-ha,” he says dryly, watching you stretch has him sinking lower in the pool so only his eyes show. He squeezes them shut when your top slips just a smidge higher as your arms raise, the curve of each breast peeking out from the bottom and giving him a heart attack. 

  He’s certain that’s exactly what’s happening when he opens them to find you slipping your white shirt on. Only it’s not your white shirt.

  It’s his.

  Steve watches the collar linger on your nose, then slip over your chin as you smile at him and hook your thumb over your shoulder, “I’m - phone…pizza.” Stumbling over your words and shuffling towards the house quickly. 

  He waits exactly sixty seconds before he’s swimming towards the ladder and climbing out. Eddie’s voice taunts from the tube he’s floating in, with his arms behind his head, even with closed eyes he looks smug, “And where are you going?”

  “To…help. With the calling for pizza.” He towels off quickly, Robin snorts and Eddie makes a booing sound. 

  Robin calls from her lounger, “Don’t say we never did anything for you, Dingus!”

  Steve slides the glass door on their snickering, the house quiet and much cooler than the Summer outside. He glances in the kitchen, the hallway, searching for you, when he hears a creak upstairs. 

  He finds you in his room, in his shirt still, sunglasses pushed onto the top of your head as you sift through a bag and pull out a pair of denim shorts.

  “Hi,” he whispers, when you look up at him.

  “Hey,” you smile, voice quiet too, “Why are we whispering?”

  “I-“ he starts quiet and clears his throat, returning to a normal volume, “I don’t know. Guess I thought if I spoke too loud I might wake up from this great dream.”

  The grin spreads on your lips and you shake your head, “Wow. That’s bad, even for you, Steve.”

  He takes a few steps towards you as you continue to shake your head with a smile, only stopping when he asks, “Say my name again? Please?”

  Steve takes the shorts from your hands, dropping them on the ground as you murmur, gently, “Steve.”

  His tongue darts over his bottom lip before he says, “Can I tell you what I want for a prize now?”

  You’re only able to manage a small, “Mhm,” between pressed together lips as your hands sweat and your stomach burns, and your chest constricts while his fingers toy with the strings of your swimsuit bottoms. 

  He kisses you, slowly, licking out over the seam of your lips until you open for him. His hands guide you backwards gently until he’s climbing over your body on his bed and Prince’s voice fades into Chris de Burgh’s. 

  His body presses against yours, weight heavy and making your eyelids flutter as his hand cups your cheek, then traces your shoulder, the curve of your breast down to your hip. Your stomach burns with want, fingers dig into his hair as he releases your lips and kisses your chin, your chest through his shirt. He only travels lower, pushing it up and kissing your stomach, along the seam of your suit. Your legs rise on either side of his head, fingers leaving his hair to curl into his sheets that surround you and fill the space with a cedar and mint haze. 

  “St-steve,” you hiccup as he nips at the inside of your thigh. 

  He moans, palms pressing you open wider, mouth leaving a wet and hot trail of kisses and breaths up each leg. This wasn’t the plan, he wanted to take it slow, but he can’t help it anymore. He speaks into your stomach, kissing your skin between every few words. 

  “Baby, please, can I taste you?” His fingers tug on the strings of your suit and his vision blurs when you make a sound that sounds like a whine and roll your hips, searching. He’s gone fully blind as you tug on his hair again, drunk off of you without a single taste. 

  “Yeah? Gonna let me put my mouth on you?” He noses at your cunt through the suit, dragging it up against the fabric, babbling anything that comes to his mind without a filter. “That what you want, honey? To come all over my tongue?”

  Your palms press to the bed as you sit up, fingers tugging at the mess of brown waves between your thighs when his tongue licks over your suit.

  Your mouth parts in a gasp, eyes fluttering from the barely there friction, the minimal release of the tension you’ve felt since the kitchen downstairs hours ago. 

  Steve looks up at the sound and nearly comes in his shorts, the image of your dazed eyes and pouting lips, the heave of your chest under his shirt having him really thinking about where his camera is again. 

  “Oh,” his voice falls into a teasing lilt, playing with his food before he eats it, “Look at you. You’re already fucked dumb and I haven’t done a thing.”

  Your body is engulfed in flames at the taunting words, somehow turned on and irritated in the same sentence.

  A Steve Harrington special skill, you think. 

  He curses the words almost immediately after they leave him, thinking he’s pushed it too far too fast but then you’re saying his name like that again, saying the word please so softly, so sincerely, his vision goes white and scratchy like the tape of all of his abilities to think clearly was just ejected from his brain. 

  Steve sits up with a groan, backing away from the bed with the shake of his head. 

  “You’re trouble,” he rasps, breathing heavily from across the room, back against his dresser.

  “What’s wrong?” The mood shift jarring and making your legs close, your arms cross over your chest in a hug, wondering what you did.

  “This,” he says then immediately waves his hands, “No, not like that! I-“ he cuts himself off with another groan, a hand swipes through his hair only making it messier. You clench around nothing at the wild hair, the pink cheeks, the dark chest hair and tan skin as he paces.

  “I wanna-“ he starts.

  “Harrington! Quit making out up there and bring down some of what I gave you! I’m tapped and the pizza guy’s here.”

  Steve curses and he spins on his dresser, grabbing his wallet.

  His wallet. 

  Bring down some of what I gave you.

  His shoulders hunch as he swears again, “Those…brats. I swear to god I’m gonna kill them.”

  He spins to find you yanking your shorts on, muttering, “I cannot believe I fucking fell for this.”

  “Fell for…what are you talking about?” Steve steps closer and you back up quickly, waving your hand at him.

  “Save it.” 

  He watches you storm out of the room, confused, and then looks down at the wallet and quickly rushes out after you, “No, no, no, honey it’s not-“

  “Don’t,” you spin on the stairs, voice icy, “Call me honey.”

  Steve takes another step down, pleading with his eyes as Eddie, Robin, and a stranger stand in the foyer, blinking up at the two of you. “Eddie didn’t give me money for that. He…” his hand swipes through his hair again, tongue over his lip as he lowers his voice, “Can we please go somewhere else to talk about this?”

  Your arms cross and Steve sighs.

  “He gave me money…for a different bet. Sort of bet. Bet is a bad word for it.”

  Something rumbles in your chest once more, though no storm was forecasted, you should have known there was bound to be more. 

  Steve’s lips pout as he waves his hand while explaining in a ramble, “After the bet started, I told them how much I actually liked you. And they agreed to help me. And if I got you to actually give me a chance, with their help of course, Eddie’d pay for a real date and Robin would cover our shifts when we went.”

  The explanation should be sweet, but all you can focus on is that Steve didn’t just have the guts to tell you right away. That your friends all helped manipulate you and lied. You start to wonder if the power even went out, if Eddie knew Steve would be at that party, if Robin put In Your Eyes on on purpose, the diner, your car being busted - all of it. 

  What was real between you and Steve, and what was made with movie magic? 

  The storm cracks in your chest, letting the first drops fall down your cheeks. 

  “I have to get out of here.”

  The calls of your name and his steps behind you on the stairs ignored as your vision blurs. 

  Leaving a boy standing in a yard on Cornwallis street while you disappear without your shoes again. 

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[azaharinflames]

Well, hello my fellow and beloved BuckTommies. I come here with a new theory - not quite or what will happen, but on what did.

Let me put my tin hat firmly on my head for a second, alright? Because we have been talking about all kinds of possibilities, and have theorized about BTS, and even budget cuts, but.

We are all missing one thing.

What happened during the summer that has repercussions in the series right now? Or that will have in the immediate future, but we’re only seeing the start of...?

An ‘I Know What You Did Last Summer’ reboot was officially announced.

It is set to be filmed in Australia come the New Year. And JLH, famously having been in the first one, is going to Australia to film for this one as well. 

This means that, just like they did in Season 5, they will have to take JLH’s absence and other compromises into consideration. In Season 5 she was on maternity leave, this time around she has a movie to shoot. And it just hit me that it might be the reason why things got moved around, and why perhaps they did what they did with BuckTommy.

(Disclaimer: I am not putting this on JLH, and I don’t want anyone to do it either. If this is something that clashed with the initial plan, what the writers and Tim came up with it’s on them, never Jennifer)

We know Tim is not someone who writes his stuff in advance. He’s flying by the seat of his pants; he writes as he goes, and this is something he has said before. So now he has to write and plan in advance because Jennifer will be somewhat absent. The direct result of this is, in my opinion, Madney.

The storyline of them having a second child at home, having her go back to her family, having Jee notice her absence, and then starting to debate on whether to have a second kid… had the potential to be more than one episode. Or, at the very least, to end the episode with them deciding that, yeah, they want to try, they want to expand their family. Maddie’s mentality on PPD could’ve been an episode in itself (Lord knows we don’t get enough Maddie episodes, especially lately), instead of a throwaway line on how she doesn’t want PPD to define her. I do think it’s amazing she’s at that point in her life and on her journey, but I can’t help but think this could’ve also been a really nice episode arc to have. Chimney’s doubts were also gone pretty quickly, with not even needing to talk to anyone about it. All in all - the storyline felt rushed and a bit anticlimactic. And at this point, I can only imagine they will somehow try to create some drama surrounding the pregnancy in 808 (807 perhaps, but it feels like it’s busy enough) so that Jennifer’s absence is justified. We don’t know if, just like in Season 5, Kenny will also be absent (Chim going with Maddie wherever she goes, I don’t know). People weren’t happy with him having to be off the show in Season 5, so I hope he stays, but we don’t know just yet. 

A side result of this could’ve also been BuckTommy. If there is something I’ve gathered from Oliver and Lou’s interviews is that both were a bit surprised it happened this soon. Now, we don’t know if this means they were breaking up for good later on in the season, if this was supposed to be a longer arc, or if they knew there were talks of break-up-make-up, once they were more established. As it is, this happened now.

And in my mind there are two possible theories. Let me present first why I have them:

-They need some substantial drama to go on for 8b. Bathena went through it in S7 and now are rebuilding their life, so it would be a bit of an overkill to have them go through it in S8 as well. Eddie is going through his own stuff and is going on a journey of discovering and enjoying himself (that, personally, I hope deals with actually dealing with it and having deep conversations with Chris). Hen and Karen have just gone over the drama of the adoption and, to be honest, they need a breather. Give them SLs that don’t involve them somewhat losing their kids (be it adoption, or an accident). 

-So… that leaves Buck. Buck, whom we all joked was the only one doing fine in Season 7. Whom we all said was going to go through it in Season 8 to compensate for his happiness in 7. Well. The joke’s on us. He’s had such a drama-free period of his life (yes, affected by what was happening around him, but not directly involved in it) that I think we forgot they enjoy making him suffer. We barely saw a thing with Gerard, and nothing to last the whole season, so… now this. 

So. From this, I see two options:

-They always knew they wanted to have BT have issues, that they didn’t want them to be easy or smooth-sailing, because has a couple in this show been that? No, right? So why would they? So they wanted a break-up arc, potentially ending in making up. Perhaps things moved around a little bit, we don’t know. But maybe they want 8b to deal with Buck trying to see what Tommy meant, yet realizing he still wants Tommy, thus starting the make-up arc. Meaning, they decided to have BT bear the weight of the heavy drama of this second half. People are already invested, clearly, and with JLH gone for a bit, they need people interested in what will happen next.

-Sort of the same, but different results - they just want Buck dating around and having drama with that. Admittedly weaker than the other option, but it is one I don’t necessarily eliminate just yet. Mostly because I’ve learned to be skeptical of 911’s intentions. 

Previous to 806, I fully expected 8b to have more Buck/BT, Madney stories as A plot, as they haven’t had one in 8A. But now that I think about it all, I can’t help but wonder if those last minutes decisions were to accomodate what will happen, just like it happened in Season 5 (which, I will remind you, dealt with her absence by having a lot more of Taylor than we were expecting. Her appearances went down quite a bit once JLH and Kenny were back, and shortly after, she was gone).

Again, I am aware I might be delulu right now. But for the first time in days, something has fully made sense to me. In conclusion:

[secretgardensinmymindd13]

it kind of annoys me that, if you think about it, the “antibuddie” attitude really comes down to blatant homophobia. and i know it’s a tired take, but i can’t not talk about it

like, how many instances of friends-to-lovers slow burns are there in tv shows where the two characters start out as genuine friends, but the more seasons pass, the more they start acting like a couple and eventually become romantic? a million. and no one bats an eye - because they’re all straight ships. everyone just thinks, “aww, that’s cute, they were friends who became a couple, that happens”

but when it comes to buddie, it’s suddenly “ruining their friendship” or “it’s just a bromance, there’s nothing romantic between them” or “eddie is straight”

why on earth would a relationship ruin their connection when they literally fit each other like puzzle pieces? aren’t people aware of the friends-to-lovers trope? or, again, are they just homophobic because they can’t imagine this trope with two friends of the same sex?

buck and eddie already spend a lot of time being domestic and understand each other like no one else, so moving in together and adding kisses and sex to their connection wouldn’t really change that much

they’re literally the “didn’t know they were dating/married” trope

and people can’t comprehend it because this is literally the first time in history where it’s a (canon) queer slow burn, and they think queer characters and relationships on tv are only allowed to be pre-planned and simple - like when the script tells you right away that this is a queer character and puts them in a relationship from the very beginning

but in real life, that’s not always how it happens

in real life, you can be unsure of your sexuality for a long time

you can search for relationships with other people, only to suddenly realize you’re actually in love with your best friend - that the love you were searching for was right under your nose

idk, for me, as a bisexual with gay and lesbian friends, everything in this show makes sense

it doesn’t feel weird to me that buck and eddie discovered their sexuality later in life, because i’m familiar with that experience, and a lot of queer people are

and if you can’t see it - if you only see queer relationships on screen as some kind of token or fetish, where it’s like, “oh, yeah, two hot guys/girls are together, that’s cool,” instead of something real and natural - then it’s really a you problem

the characters just fell in love, because with their personalities and background stories, they make sense for each other

it happens. and it’s actually just as close to real life as being sure of your sexuality from the beginning

like, you know queers are actual people and not these pre-established characters, right? and everyone’s experience is different

it’s just that buck and eddie are going through a phase that hen, karen, and josh probably went through when they were younger

eddie is extremely queer-coded, even if it wasn’t planned. he’s just the case of “trying to make a character so straight that he ends up gay”. he’s literally a michael - only he fortunately had the chance to discover and embrace his sexuality earlier than michael

and it’s a beautiful and important kind of representation to show them in this part of their journey, because it can resonate with a lot of queer people and maybe even help someone in real life understand their sexuality better

and i strongly disagree with the “we need more healthy representation of close friendship between two males” argument, because i feel like we actually do have a lot of it (sam and dean’s literal brotherly bond, matt and foggy from daredevil, chandler, joey, and ross from friends, jon snow and sam tarly from game of thrones, jake and boyle from brooklyn 9-9, etc)

and we also had a lot of same sex friendships with great romantic potential that never came to the “lovers” phase (dean and cas, steve and bucky, charles and erik, kara and lena from supergirl, etc)

so i think what the show is doing with buck and eddie’s relationship is way more important at the moment

anyway, yeah, i’m just very emotional about how revolutionary buddie is for queer representation, and that we’re finally at a place in our society where a queer slow burn is taken seriously and comes to fruition on major network television right before our eyes

and it’s mostly because both the actors and the writers listened to queer feedback about the characters and were like, “you know what? you’re actually right. we thought we were writing straight characters at first, but we see why you get queer vibes from them, and we’re gonna pursue this direction because it honestly makes sense” and i think that’s beautiful

(spn could never 🙄)

[stagefoureddiediaz]

Costume Meta 7x05

Hello, Hey, how we all doing??

Ready for another super long meta post??

There is so much to talk about this week - admittedly mostly Buck and Eddie related, but there is also plenty going on for Hen and Karen as well.

No Bobby this week as we only see him in uniform, and only the one costume for Athena as well. I also want to say that I am not doing any of the costumes from the Madney wedding that we saw at the end of the epsiode - I want to give them the space they deserve and I will probably write a separate pre episode meta for those costumes specifically! All I will say is Maddie looks stunning, Buck in white - hello! and Eddie in a just a collar making him look like a pink priest - hilarious!

The rest is under the cut as always 😎

Let's start with some of the guest characters.

Alien Hand syndrome man continues to prove the check means bad things theme, which makes me happier than you can ever know!!

Then we have Deidra in her very bright pink coat. If you read my promo meta for this episode you will have read a fairly sizeable section at the end on my thinking about the use of pink in this season (going to make a separate post during this hiatus so its all in one place). All of the times we see it in this episode, play into (and I guess prove) my thinking. Deidra is acting with good intentions and while I don't think she's naive or innocent in the strictest sense of the word, she is perhaps continually being naive in thinking that not revealing Mara's past is the right way to go (don't come at me about child protection etc I am fully aware of what the real world laws state, but this story arc really highlights the fact that in trying to protect children who are at risk and in the system, they can also cause ongoing harm if things are not taken on a case by case basis - its a whole other essay that I am not getting into here).

Then we have Mara herself who is never without pink - namely her pink blanket. The pink plays into the theme of innocence especially with Mara and while she may not be innocent of the act of maiming Denny, her innocence goes much deeper. Its meant as a very clear signpost of the innocence of childhood - that pink blanket and her clinging onto it is a symbol of her clinging onto her childhood, despite the fact that she has gone through a terrible loss and trauma. she is still a child and the show is clearly going to play into the idea that as she settles into the Wilson home and is able to work through the trauma, her need to cling onto her childhood in this way will diminish and we'll see her slowly become less attached to the blanket. We already have signs of progress with the colour journey her tops have been on - lavender, pink and then the turquoise one at the end. Lavender is also a colour associated with childishness or lethargy, pink the colour of innocence, and childhood. While turquoise is a colour of calmness and clarity. its signalling HenRen's breakthrough with Mara and that she's growing and beginning to feel secure.

Hen and Karen

Hen and Karen go on a real colour journey this week - I'm doing them together (along with Denny) because they very much work in tandem clothing wise (and also because I was running out of pictures again - whats new there!)

So first up we have Karen in this beautiful dip dye ombre dress in purple, pink and mauve. it also has this drip staining pattern which has deliberately been created during the dying process. The lavender at the top of the dress is representative of hope and serenity, this is Karen in a great place - about to expand her family and fulfil a dream. The pink as I've said is all about innocence and naivety - more innocence in this case - both the new baby being innocent and Hen and Karens innocent hopes for their future. The dark mauve at the bottom of the skirt - eating into the pink is such a choice - gathering storm clouds, foreshadowing the turmoil about to come - taking away the innocent hope. mauve can be standoffish and withdrawn, and in this context those are great descriptors for Mara and her struggles that Hen and Karen will need to help her work through.

Hen's in cyan blue trousers - which is a colour associated with clarity and balance. whilst the cream, black and blue jacket with stars on is the beginning point for a theme that runs through the Wilsons arc this week - black is a power colour, associated with many things, but for Hen and Karen in this arc it is very much about protection and strength. Here for hen it is mostly about protection - protecting this new baby they are about to take in. The cream is warmth and tranquility.

Hen is wearing check - foreshadowing the upcoming struggles with Mara. Karens bronze and black Jacquard trousers are a symbol of strength - bronze as a colour means strength and support, it's also a symbol of faithfulness. It's telling us that Karen will take the lead on supporting Mara and being strong for her.

We see a lot of white on Karen in this episode, white, like pink is a colour of innocence, but it is more associated with purity and balance. It is also a colour of neutral refelction. By this I mean that it amplifies other colours by providing a neutral background - allowing other colours to shine. I find this a really interesting thing when connected with Karen - it amplifies her strength and supportive nature when the Wilsons meet Mara.

Hen adn Karen in bed are in dusty versions of blue and pink - Karen innocently tries to touch Mara and that is when the screaming starts. Putting Hen in blue is about relaying her trustworthiness and sets her up as a soothing and calming presence for Mara - hence the sleeping on the floor of her room!

At the hospital, We see Denny in red - he was wearing it when Mara woke the house up and its an indicator of what is about to befall them (in the same way Bobbys red in the cruise ship disaster adn Athenas red in relation to Harry, or Bucks back in s5 when Eddie broke down).

We again have Karen in white amplifying the other colour she is wearing, which in this instance is this buff/brown oversized sleeveless coat in teddy fleece. The brown is stability, dependability and responsibility - playing into the fact this episode really highlights Karen's position in the family as this stable rock which Hen and Denny lean on when they need support. Karen's unswerving and solid personality is once more being shown off. Its really a key thing for them to show as it feels like a set up for Mara and how she is going to bond and rely on Karen and that dependability as she unpacks her trauma.

The orange jumper is a really interesting choice. I do love the loose threads on the design of it - paying into the idea that Hen and Karen are at a loose end and unsure what to do going forward. But, the orange itself is generally an open minded colour, its energetic and its also a colour of transformation. These are all things we know are true of Hen and Karen and it hints at the fact that they will fin a way forward. Once again we have Karen in white amplifying Hen's orange and the energy and idea of transformation the colour brings.

Denim jacket and white tee. I love the distressed nature of this denim jacket and the way it plays into both scenes we see it in - playing into the distress Hen feels over finding out what Mara has gone through and how it explains why she has become non verbal and incredibly protective over her pink blanket.

Again the white of amplification and purity. Hen has pure intentions and the white amplifies Karens black when they are at dispatch listening to the 911 call.

We also have the Karen necklace back - once more showing this ism't about Hen - its about Karen and their family.

Black on Karen for this scene is such a choice. Black is a power colour, it means strength and protection. Here it is showing Karens determination, as she gains understanding, to protect Mara and support her through her trauma - it is representative of Karen choosing to use the power she has been given through gaining information. The gold highlights hint at success.

I love these lavender pyjamas on Karen - lavender is a soothing and sleep inducing colour (along with its scent which is possibly where the association came from for the colour) along with a Japanese print of mountains and trees, which plays into the idea of serenity and peacefulness.

Hen in contrast is wearing fairly bright and bold black and green. The green is all about that growth and learning once more, the growth of Hen and Karen, learning more about the issues Mara faces and seeking a solution, but also the growth of their family. The black is a reflection of power - much in the same way Karen wearing black when they heard the 911 call Mara made, here it is Hen, representing the protection that Hen and Karen are offering Mara.

Athena in green - again with the mesh open weave knit - this may be a theme for her this season - potentially something to do with feeling caged or caging someone/something - especially children as both scenes we've seen it so far have been to do with young people and the law in some respect - ending up in the system - Harry through is crime and Mara through her parents death.

Chim

This dark bottle green with a fawn brown (what I think is a polo) shirt underneath is Chimneys only non uniform costume this week . This kind of dark green, is as always a signal of growth, but its also a colour of harmony, and right now - everything in Chim's world is harmonious.

Maddie

I don't thinkI've said it yet, but I am so happy to have Alayna back dressing Jennifer - I feel like we're really back on track with Maddie's costuming after last season where they somehow managed to make Maddie look terrible. The costuming overall last year was fine - not as good as Alayna's work, but it was for the most part good - except for Maddie where it was all over the place!

Anyway - Maddie in black here is very much about focussing the attention on Hen and Karen - like with CHimney's muted green, in tandem they are making the viewers eye focus on Hen and Karen - especially Karen - who is the brightest in the room.

Maddie wearing this sage green colour when Buck comes out to her is sheer perfection from my perspective - we, once more have the green of growth and renewal, the green of learning - Maddie learning more about her brother - this new thing that he is realising about himself and choosing to share with her (even if inadvertently). But this green is also sage green - sage as in the play on sage advice - which we see Maddie give him. Buck needs that good advice - he needs to hear that its ok, that he can take the time to figure himself out and that its ok that he's only just uncovered this aspect of himself and that it doesn't invalidate him being an ally up to this point!

Ok not going to lie - I got a little carried away from here on out - so sorry in advance for the rambling mess you're about to read!

Marisol

I'm doing Marisol in a weird order - because I wanted to talk about her date night outfit in tandem with Eddies - because its relevant. So we start of with virgin Mary Marisol! Honestly this outfit is just perfection from the costume department - they saw the brief and went to town and I love it. Its so good to see what they can do when they get to play!

One of the things I really love about this costume is the blue that they chose. Because that blue - that is Bucks blue! the virgin Mary blue is usually a much brighter royal blue. It really helps to place Marisol in parallel to Buck and we get the play on t he fact that Eddie seeing Marisol in this way changes everything for him, whilst later on, whilst Buck is in the same blue, he reassures him that nothing will change between them.

Look, I'm not going to lie, when I saw Marisol in blue and yellow for this scene I laughed because Blue and yellow (as I've gone on a million times about) means queer coding so to blatantly put Marisol in it - in a washed out form, and very much connecting her to Catholicism - genius move. It marks her out as a roadblock, but also puts her into the role of beard (unknowingly on her part) because Eddie is still in the midst of his repression, even if it is beginning to unravel now.

The black top with spaghetti straps is clearly a theme they're going with on Marisol, as are the ditsy prints. The yellow high waisted trousers are interesting because of the specific shade of yellow. Yes the whole communication theme still applies here -and we see it in action, but this shade of yellow is sallow and sickly (one of the reasons its called sickly yellow is because its the colour of a lot of medications!!) - this relationship and its restart are ill and that automatically means its going to struggle to survive.

It plays into the more negative meanings around the colour - uncertainty and idleness and cowardice. For me the cowardice aspect is an interesting one in relation to Eddie - he has behaved cowardly up to this point - hiding out and not having the conversations that need to be had, and even in this scene it is Marisol who takes the lead.

It's really giving us an indication of things Eddie needs to work on in regards to himself - and once more it comes down to communication. Communication has always been Eddies major flaw - that he isn't good at it, unless really really pushed into it - essentially under duress. The other thing with communication is that it plays really well into the catholic guilt aspect - this idea that growing up catholic has taught him to repress part of who he is - to go along with what is expected of him, but that it also taught him not to ask for what he needs, to not communicate. We see it in this episode with his inability to say no to Marisol (the whole hiding out at Bucks so he doesn't have to have sex speaks volumes) even down to suggesting there's a third type of guy - who just needs a minute. Because, while that might be true to a certain extent, the fact that he says this off the back of her expressing her distress and upset about how all guys are one of two things, speaks volumes - its not him saying this because that's how he actually feels, its partly him saying it because he is pushed into a position where he doesn't want to be the bad guy. its really not a good place to be restarting a relationship from.

We also have the ditsy print of doom in play again - like I've said before, ditsy print on Eddies girlfriends - never a good sign - its really playing into this idea of Eddie jumping in headfirst with gay abandon (pun intended) and then regretting his life choices. Shannon wore ditsy print a fair amount - especially in the I think I'm pregnant' and 'we should get a divorce' scenes. Ana wore ditsy print A LOT - she was wearing it when Eddie had his panic attack in the shop and at other key moments that marked the death knell for their relationship. And so this appearance of ditsy print here marks the same - the relationship is not long for this world

OK date night Marisol. The way this outfit played out more or less as I expected, She was very much an 'innocent' bystander in this scene (whilst also creating one corner of a triangle with Buck and Eddie) , and the ditsy print very much played into this. Like I said in my promo meta, both Shannon and Ana were costumed in ditsy print as well as in lots of pink!!!

The other aspect of this outfit that is making me laugh is the fact that the skirt is giving me 1980's/early 1990's teen vibes (not to out myself as old but trust me I had some just like this back then and I wouldn't be caught dead in it now as a grown woman!!) and the baby pink handbag looks like something an 8 year old would have to play dress up with - its all very childish and immature - naive one could say, and while it didn't play out quite how I was expecting, her being a novice nun, sure explains a lot of why she comes over as pretty immature.

The other aspect of this childish style we're seeing on her plays into Eddies narrative of looking for magic and trying to recreate what he had with Shannon. He's attracted to Marisol because she is immature and childish - it reminds him of what he had with Shannon when he was young, and when you're trying to recapture that, its easy to fall into the trap of thinking someone behaving in a naive manner is you finding what you'd been looking for. Eddies journey, along side his catholic guilt, is about learning that he cannot recapture or recreate that magic he had when he was young - that the love of youth - in all its innocence is not something that is sustainable or actually what he wants in the present.

Then we have Eddie in white. I spoke in the promo meta about how the white set him and Marisol as opposites and that remains true - very true on more than one level. What I especially love about it and something I could not have predicted is how it plays into the novice nun aspect of their story this episode - truly this show is a comedy! Because nuns wear black and white this is an obvious play on that, but it is also a play on the fact that Marisol is still a practicing catholic, whilst Eddie is very much not. The other aspect of this white is that of Eddies two non uniform costumes, it is the first one and we get this black and white play on religion - the black and white of nuns and priests - the black and white of being religious or not. Eddie never questions if he wants to become a practicing catholic again - he is lapsed and that is how he intends to stay.

Eddie in uniform, with his green trainers, blue towel and water bottle. the blue towel and bottle play into the buck and Eddie blue green theming we see with them. But what is interesting is though is that Eddie is fulfilling all the colour theming on his own - he is both blue and green - to me this is about Eddies own struggles within himself as well as foreshadowing the Eddie Marisol break up down the line (green shoes suggest a road needs to be to walked before we get there) - it hints at Eddies internal struggles and implies that its will ultimately end in a break up a bit further down the line.

I also think it's only when in Uniform that Eddie can admit to his catholic guilt. Because we all know when Eddie is struggling with some form of emotional turmoil, he wears a black singlet - and he could've been wearing the same here, it would've been totally fitting with the situation - he is going through something emotionally and struggling with it.

But he's in his uniform. Part of it is to have him on a different level to Buck - they are both struggling with something in this scene. When we have previously had Buck and Eddie scenes like this one at work, the one dressed in uniform, tends to be the one offering advice to the one not in uniform. That isn't the case here. Part of it comes back to Buck not actually needing advice, but needing to reveal something about himself - to confess. Eddie is the one who needs advice.

This is a flipping of the traditional narrative for these scenes and is proof that even though Eddie might later tell Buck that nothing is going to change between them, that it has in fact already changed, it is just that neither of them are fully cognisant of that change at this moment in time. It is a key indicator to use the audience that this has happened before but that things are not going to play out the same way this time.

Put it this way - Eddie has form for doing something extreme with his relationships with women in the aftermath of Buck doing something dumb - its one of the manifestations of his repression. This time its asking Marisol to move in with him in the immediate aftermath of Buck going full green monster over Tommy.

Last time it was in the aftermath of Buck begins and then doubling down with Ana after the shooting when Buck had hooked up with Taylor and before that in the aftermath of Shannon's death and Buck suing the department he went and joined a fight club - but he has form. Its completely in character for him to pull this sort of a move. I know he says he's going with his gut but I argue he is in fact ignoring his gut - or at the very least confused about what his gut is telling him, because that would mean actually looking at why his gut reaction to Buck doing something dumb makes him do something dumb in turn connected to these women in his life.

Eddie in black - this is the same shirt as the white one - just the reverse colour - which is important. This shirt has several layered meanings to it. its about the reversal of what Eddie wants - from him being bubbly and excited about Marisol moving in, to the dread of her having moved in and wanting her to move out - his feelings go from white to black - light to dark - happy to unhappy and it all sums up the relaity of that relationship - while it was new and unserious, it was fun and light, when things got real - it becomes dark and oppressive.

I'll go into more detail about this shirt when I get to Bucks costume for this scene - because they are connected!

The other thing about this outfit is that the green trousers have been replaced with jeans. Now I see a couple of reasons for the wardrobe department doing this. Firstly is that it plays into the 'nothings is going to change between us' of it all. Its a visual indicator that in fact things have changed (along with Buck wearing a brighter shirt than we normally get in these buddie heart to hearts that take place in Bucks loft but more on that later) the Buck being bi and going on a date with Tommy of it all aside, this is the first time we've actively seen Eddie hiding out at Bucks to avoid his girlfriend - this was a barrier that had existed between them previously that has now been broken down. Then there is the fact that Eddie does go home to Marisol - and he couldn't be wearing green at that point because she was wearing blue and Eddie in green would've meant break up time - only the Marisol as a plot device arc isn't yet over (it will be soon I promise - all the costume signs are there!) so that couldn't happen.

Tommy

This dark olive green shirt that is almost brown. The brown undertones hint at the stability he represents while the green is hinting at his military past and once more paralleling him with Eddie. One of the things about green as a colour is that its not only a symbol of growth and renewal, but its also a colour of learning, and in an episode titled 'You don't know me' it feels like all the green is very much about education - learning about other people - and the growth that results from it. It feels especially important here for Tommy and Buck - that is after all what going on a date it all about - learning about one another and seeing if you're compatible.

The other fun thing about this green shirt is though that the green plays into the blue green colour theory when it comes to Buck and Eddie and their partners and the end of relationships. This one before its had chance to begin.

For Coffee we have a grey Henley and a blue zip front hoodie with a grey striped undertone to it (I am pretty sure this is actually a hoodie we've seen on Chimney but I can't remember when and I don't think it would be the very same one as pretty sure Lou would not be fitting into Kenneths clothes ever, but Chimney has definelty worn the same style!!). Again Henley's are an Eddie thing, so we once more have the parallel with Eddie being drawn.

The interesting thing here is that the grey blue is the same colour combo Buck wore on their first date attempt - the costume department played a lot with flipping colour in this episode, so to have it done here as well is really fun - the fact there is more grey than blue is also interesting. It's a neutral colour, it is seen as a colour of stability, but is also a colour of uncertainty. It really plays into that theme of uncertainty running through the Buck and Tommy arc. The blue hoodie is actually pretty important because we've had one of Buck and Tommy wearing something dark blue in every scene they've had together - usually the one on the back foot. Tommy in this scene is relatively neutral in terms of position for most of this scene - they are equals - but he is put onto the back foot by Buck asking him to be his date to Maddie and Chim's wedding.

Buck

Where to start with our beloved bi disaster!

I obviously spoke a fair amount about the date night shirt in my promo meta. The navy blue knit bowling shirt with these silver/grey close together pinstripes running down the front playing into the Buck wearing vertical stripes theme we've has running with him for at least the last 2 seasons.

What I said about false starts and this date absolutely played out - in the same way the sperm donation shirt represented a false start on that donation, this shirt also represents a false start on Bucks dating life as a bi man. The white trainers are also carrying on the theme of Bucks Journey towards happiness

What I find most interesting about this outfit though isn't colour theory related. its all about the fit of the clothes. Because these are ill fitting on Buck - not something we see from him very often - in fact I think the only time we see him in anything close to ill fitting to this extent is back in season 1 when he was figuring out who he was and if being a firefighter was the right for him and exploring relationships and what he was trying to find in that arena. The trousers are the most ill fitting of it all, but I'll come to the trousers later on as they are part o a wider Buck costume theme we have going on!

The shirt is a little roomie, but not overly so, it just stands out more because we're so used to his shirts fighting for their life, here this one is baggy and really helps to sell the idea of defeat, but also that h was trying on this new part of himself for size and that it doesn't quite fit. It's the only time this episode we see his clothes not fit him in this way and its a really small but expressive part of costuming that I love to see.

Then we have this blue broadcloth jacket over a white tee and with these plum/brown coloured trousers - they're a bit blink and you'll miss them so its hard to be sure what type of trouser they are, but I think they are essentially smart joggers - jersey material but trousers!

We all know that Buck in white means trouble, I'm putting him outing himself to his sister as the bad thing - along with the fact that the date didn't work out.

I'm really fascinated by the fact that we really seem to be leaning into navy blue and Buck being bi. Navy has always been a colour we've seen a lot of on Buck in general, but there is something about the fact we've seen him (or Tommy) wearing it in every single scene that is about his bisexuality. I'm talking from the kiss scene onwards, not anything before that as Buck wasn't aware of his bisexuality before the kiss. I can't wait to see if it continues!

The green shirt jacket is an interesting one. it obviously helps to play into the buck and Eddie blue green theory, but it does in a smaller way play into the blue green theming we see around Buck and Eddie and their relationships - specifically around issues arising. Both Buck and Eddie wear green when they break up with their significant others and while there is no break up here, there is a break of sorts. This was Buck about to try and tell his Best friend that he was actually out on a date with Tommy and that he's bi

symbol of growth - Buck went in with a goal - to tell Eddie he was on a date with Tommy, but changed tack when he saw Eddie needed to go through something - this is Buck growing as a person - not making something about him.

The other thing about this outfit is that its basically the same as the one Eddie wore at the airfield (even down to the badding of the trousers) - just in reverse - Eddie black trousers, black jacket, green top, and here Buck is black trousers, black top and green jacket - I find this fascinating as a metaphor for where the two of them are on their respective journeys.

Buck is now bi and out (he's told his sister) and has been on a date with a guy (regardless how successful it was - he cannot put it back into the box) - his growth is externalised and therefore expressed through the wearing of a green jacket. We get a lot of storytelling through the various Jackets Buck wears (we've seen him in over 35 at this point!)

While Eddie - who we could say was being taken on a date by Tommy - even if he didn't know it (because who flies someone to Vegas to a sold out fight if its not a date??) wearing a much brighter green that we've seen on him before now (pretty much all of his greens are more army green with a couple of exceptions - much darker greens akin to Bucks jacket in the below picture) - still in the army green wheelhouse, but much bolder. Eddie's queer status is still very much internalised - hence it being underneath the black jacket.

Buck coming out to Eddie from a costume perspective was a glorious parallel that I have already mentioned in the promo meta (I've run out of pictures so you'll have to go watch the scene yourself if you want to see what I mean). Its actually a bit deeper that I appreciated in that promo meta, but that is in part because at the time of writing the meta I wasn't 100% sure it was a coming out scene and I didn't get to see the way it was shot and how that also played into the paralleling.

Costume wise - I already spoke above about Eddies black shirt and how it is reversing him in the episode. But what I didn't mention is that fact that it parallels in colour terms, what he was wearing when Buck informed the firefam that Connor and Kameron were pregnant. Eddie wore a black marl henley - black with flecks of dark grey running through it, and Buck here is wearing a slightly darker blue version of the same top he wore in that same scene. He is standing in the same place at the counter of his kitchen, or sitting very close to the same position and we get similar camera angles. As a whole the parallel is very loud - Buck was happy and proud of something he had done and wanted to share it with his friends - wanted their approval. He was feeling good about himself and confident in his decision.

The biggest thing about the blue - this shade specifically is the way it play into the blue theme we saw last season with Buck - the theme that started in the 5x18 finale at Hen and Karens vow renewal, when he was free of Taylor and moving forward and essentially restarting his search for happiness. We saw it weave a thread through the entirety of season 6, being worn at key moments that played into that theme - after Lev died, at various points in the sperm donation arc, and a key points in the aftermath of his death and rebirth.

The successfully helping create life aspect of this is so interesting. It on a low key level plays into the you don’t find it you make it manifesto that’s been at the heart of bucks arc since s2. the whole year if yes was supposed to be about this very thing - about Buck creating the life he wants for himself  - the sperm donation isn’t about the baby it’s about Buck and about him figuring out what he’s missing (which comes back to not only Thomas and Mitchell, but also Lev).

The other thing that ties into this theme is that Eddie isn't really changing but Buck is. Whenever we have a scene at the loft between Buck and Eddie Bucks costume and colour varies, but Eddies stays more or less the same. Bucks colour Palette for these scenes goes - dark grey in the you want to go for the title scene, then we have the grey blue on the balcony and now this much lighter blue. This is highlighting Bucks progression while Eddie who remains in his black shirt and that progression - while Eddie essentially remains steadfast - is key - it’s showing us that while buck is still doing dumb things, he is learning - he is listening to whatever Eddie is telling him - that he’s accepting Eddie’s absolution of his sins more and more - growing and understanding. 

It’s building on his long running arc - his fear of being left behind, of not being important enough for people to stick around for - and showing us he’s increasingly understanding that that fear is unfounded - that he’s found his personal- the one who will stay and who is steadfast in that. That’s why we see Eddie unchanging in his black shirt green cargos while buck gets lighter - more unburdened by that fear.

Before you think all is lost on the Eddie front though, we are seeing change - the army green trousers are gone and have been replaced with jeans - perhaps, in the same way Bucks growth into his bisexuality began with his beginning to wear jeans again, Eddies own growth into his own queer identity also begins with jeans - moving him away from Eddie the soldier - fighting for others - being a rock for others and now into a position where he can do his own growing.

In the sperm donation arc, Buck was finally able to donate and was wearing that super pale mint green polo. we don't see the same with the outcome here at this point in the story (although the beige/mint green jacket from the bachelor party is making me👀👀👀 at this moment in time!) - we get this cream open weave linen shirt with black and terracotta and golden brown vertical stripes.

I love that they went with a shirt that has such an open weave - playing into the whole concept of Buck being open and embracing this newly revealed part of him that he's discovered. But what I love most about this shirt is the way it ties back into the Buck learning to accept himself and find his happiness.

Because this shirt is so similar to the one from 6x01 - when he decides he doesn't need a new couch, what he needs is to be ok on his own and with himself.

lets talk Buck and his trousers because the trousers are a whole thing this season and I am truly in love with the long game the wardrobe department have been playing on this one. They know that we have all been out here raising eyebrows at Bucks trousers for the past few seasons as they've gotten shorter and shorter and ill fitting. I know I've made comments in previous costume metas about the fact they must be doing something intentional with them being so short in the leg - that them doing this is giving the appearance of a child who is still in short trousers and isn't fully grown - hasn't moved on to wearing full length trousers yet.

Well it would seem I was right and thats exactly what they were doing, putting him in short trousers to show that he wasn't his fully formed self - that he was growing and learning and figuring things out. because - I've gone back through my spreadsheet and checked his trousers out for all of his scenes and there are only a handful where he has trousers on that are well fitted and the correct length. One of them is at the start of season 6 - at the end of the episode where he moves his armchair instead of getting a new couch - the one time in season 6 we see him most at peace with himself

I remarked in the 7x04 meta that we only saw Buck in his too short trousers in the one scene at the airfield, and from then on, he was was in jeans. Now the jeans are a mimicking thing - Buck hasn't worn stone wash jeans since Eddie appeared on the scene back at the start of season 2, so for him to start wearing them again as soon as he becomes jealous of Eddie and Tommy - and Tommy is wearing jeans - was pretty telling in its own right. It's Buck trying to get Eddies attention (not Tommys - Eddies) because, we do not see Eddie in jeans in 7x04 - but we do see Tommy in them - and in Bucks head he is loosing Eddies attention to a guy wearing stone wash jeans - so if he wears stonewash jeans then maybe he'll get Eddies attention back.

That obviously didn't work out how Buck thought it would, but it did lead to him figuring a new part of himself out.

We can see how his trousers are all now sitting at the correct length, I grabbed this still of the black ones, and you can see in the full length still from the date those are as well (even if they're too big more generally) but the others are all sitting at the correct length as well.

We also see the jeans back for his scene with Tommy - I truly am fascinated by the choice to put him back in stonewash jeans aafter so long as a theming choice for his bisexuality, I really am enjoying this more relaxed looking Buck from a costuming perspective - the journey we've been on with his costumes is great - the increasingly formal style thats just a little too small and tight we've seen over the seasons now slowly relaxing once more into something much more comfortable and well fitted - showing just how far he has truly come.

And thats me out for another week! Sorry it turned into another epic - it would seem `i cant stop myself! Not sure if this has come out longer than last weeks, I think it might've, but I can't be bothered to check! Thank you as always for reading this monster and I hope you enjoyed this deep dive into the costumes for 7x05. I'm off now to hyperfixate on Bucks bathroom door and get myself though this mini hiatus!

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[saveahorserideaneddie]

okay okay okay so i finally got to sit and watch the full ep (8x13) in its entirety with no distractions after watching it once split in half, and i have a few thoughts (nothing bad so don’t worry just a few notes i had written here and there while watching!!)

- while i like the fact that they gave a little focus to hen in this ep, i wish her feeling invisible would have stemmed more from something a little more realistic than people she’s known for so much of her life just seemingly forgetting her birthday out of nowhere- it felt odd that they’ve all known her and been family to her for years not remembering (although perhaps im just infusing my own philosophy on my friends’ birthdays where i intentionally set up reminders way ahead of time so i can plan something accordingly but i digress) it would have made more sense if they wanted this forgotten birthday plotline to center it more around ravi and showcase his struggles with trying to fit in with the group (also calling back to being called eddie in 8x11) and could serve as a way for him to really solidify his place as one of the mains giving him the flashy plot point of talking down archie on the bus- that being said, if they wanted the ep to be focused on hen (which i am so so so so so glad we got a henisode after so long) i feel like it should have been less about people forgetting her birthday, painting everyone else ss lowkey dicks, and more of playing on the fact thst she kinda has been pushed to the side narratively since ep 4/5 of s8 BUT i didn’t hate the plotline just thought it could have been reworked

- i already talked more at length in that 1 am ramble i went on about the set dressing of eddie’s el paso house, but i do love just how out of place eddie’s furniture looks in that house and not in a “he’s still settling in way” but genuinely in a “this stuff doesn’t belong here way” that really solidifies the run down house’s role of reflecting his relationship with his parents and texas as a whole- attempting to settle back into that dynamic but he’s a new person and he will never fit into the old dilapidated conventions he grew up in no matter how hard he tries- to me this felt a little bit more of a subtly effective move on the show rather than the blatant “oh the house is falling apart haha” funny bit in ep 12… not that that bit didn’t work for its purpose in that episode as a funny cutaway during the job interview but i feel like the symbolism of the furniture being so put of place, and also showing eddie trying to fix a cabinet while on facetime w buck- in essence “trying to fix his relationship w his family”- was a much more solid metaphorical statement of where eddie’s at in these episodes

- (this was something i wrote down the first time i watched it but i thought it was funny) does the show know texas? bc i don’t think the show knows texas…

- a single day chess tournament in a town 5 hours away with no intention of having the kids stay overnight is so funny to me they were really gonna make those kids ride a bus for 10 whole hours that day with a random chess tournament in between

- mara <3 (that’s it, that’s the note)

- i miss the athena and hen bestieism from earlier seasons and im so glad we got it back for a second this ep

- again, i already spoke at length about my thoughts on eddie’s speech to his mother snd how i thought it was much more of a gut punch to her than him yelling at her so no notes there

- my one disappointment is the way they chise to have eddie say (paraphrasing) “i’m gonna start acting like [a dad]”… i know this can be read as eddie having never thought of himself as a good father, but i feel like his emotional journey in the episode was being framed as “no- i am a good dad, and i always have been” (which is why buck told him he needed to dad-up because the only time he hadn’t been was while chris was gone) and instead that line switched the message of the arc to “i need time start acting like a dad now” which isn’t true? because eddie’s entire character up to this point has been that he ONLY views himself as a dad, and we’ve had all these interviews and conversations detailing “he needs to learn who he is aside from being chris’s dad” and we haven’t seen any of that, and that line feels to me like they’re saying “nope- all he needs to be is a dad.” and… yes, of course being a dad is VERY important to him and should not be sacrificed, but i wish the writers had made the choice to just leave it at:

chris: you’ll be my dad again?

eddie: i’ve always been your dad

rather than tacking on the “now its time for me to act like one” because then that would tell the audience “okay, yes, he’s acknowledging that he’s christopher’s dad and he always has been, but he’s accepting that the time apart has at least started a journey to finding himself as a whole” but instead it kinda…. closed that door (im NOT saying that eddie’s self identity won’t be explored in some way down the line, i just feel like this was an odd writing choice that didn’t really match what the episode was trying to convey for eddie and chris’s relationship but it was written by taylor wong so i’m not expecting masterclass level writing in any way shape or form from her 💀)

anyway, as a whole i really did enjoy the episode- 12 and 13 (and to an extent 11 but i detest that episode on fundamentally different conditions) both really felt more in line with what i loved about earlier seasons of the show and fit the kind of episode formula that made me love the show initially so it was refreshing to see that after 8a was kind of a whole lot of nothing salad and then 8b started with DRAMA DRAMA DRAMA and is about to continue the DRAMA DRAMA DRAMA that i wish would be a bit more spread out than it has been this season and last. these two episodes have been a nice treat and i absolutely hate that i wasn’t able to watch them live because of various reasons but i still enjoyed them even after the fact going in with a baseline knowledge of what happened in both of them. (and also i was VERY pleasantly surprised w the writing of ep 12 considering it was written by two LS writers who don’t know these characters- somehow they had a better understanding of them than other certain writers who have written for the main show do after years of writing for them 💀 BUT I DIGRESS)

**ofc this is all my own opinion and i know others may disagree with me but i feel like im always so hard on this show and its often… okayish writing choices and i wanted to actually take a moment to say something constructive about an episode i did really like as a whole**

[apomaro-mellow]

King and Prince 23

Part 22

It was story time again. The kids were chattering as they got settled in on the couches and chairs. Eddie sat in his own special chair at the head. Steve almost didn’t come tonight. He had a lot to think about after the talk in the forest. He sat down at the end of a couch, Dustin, Will, and El acting as buffers between him and Eddie. A few times they caught each other’s gaze anyway, quickly turning away when they did.

There was a moment…they locked eyes and didn’t look away. The children’s chatter fading in the background. Eddie had his hands clasped in front of him, knees up as he perched on the chair like a gargoyle. He wondered what Eddie was thinking, what did he see when he looked at him? A spoiled, naive prince? Someone who needed constant watch? Someone he liked to see getting fucked?

What were they to each other?

Lucas snapped his fingers in front of Eddie’s face, bringing him back to the present and making him start the story. Eddie gave a quick recap of where they left off and then the kids had all of his attention. That left Steve able to stare unbidden. He was able to watch him gesture with his lovely hands, always adorned with at least three rings. His eyes, wild yet kind. His hair, that he knew was soft but didn’t know how it might feel between his fingers.

Steve knew the feeling spreading through him but was hesitant to call it by its name. The man before him was putting on a squeaky but commanding voice as he pretended to be a mouse knight to assist the adventurers on their journey. He was the same person who had transformed right before Steve’s eyes into a beast with fangs and claws. He had dispatched a bear and then let Steve pet him in the same moment.

When the story reached the end of tonight’s chapter, Steve didn’t linger. Instead, he walked out as the kids trudged, sticking close to Dustin. 

“Hey, can we talk?”, Steve whispered, keeping it between them.

“Can it wait until morning?”, Dustin asked, admitting he was tired by rubbing his eyes.

“No”, Steve pulled him into a random room.

“What’s the all about?”, Dustin plopped onto a chair. A fire was already going in this room and Steve wondered if somebody had just left it.

“I’ve been thinking recently about the things you said. About Eddie.”

“What about Eddie?”

Steve sighed. “About how I should start seeing that Eddie might have different sides but they’re all him. He is capable of great feats of power but…” he sat down next to Dustin. “He is also the kind to let you run over him.”

“So you guys are officially friends now?”

“I think it might be more than that-”

“Are you serious right now?”. Robin interjected, book in hand as she stood in the doorway. 

Dustin and Steve looked at her like children caught in the act. The fire roaring in a room with no one in it made more sense now. Robin came in, closing the door behind herself, arms crossed now.

“You two are having a midnight heart to heart about Steve and Eddie without me? Does that make any sense to you?”

Dustin held his hands up. “I was just dragged here. Technically it’s my bed time.”

Steve rolled his eyes. “Don’t pretend to be responsible now.” Then he gave his attention to Robin. “I didn’t know you were so invested.”

“I just think it would be really funny if the man who wanted to kill our beloved king turned out to fall for him. I didn’t realize Eddie was sooo charismatic and charming.”

Steve’s face got warm and he covered it by walking over to the fireplace. He hadn’t really thought of those words in regards to Eddie before. He’d met many a flirtatious person. People who tried their best to woo him. People who knew which lines to use, just how much to touch without being pushy, and knew how to let their eyes linger on certain body parts without appearing lecherous.

Eddie had never purposely come onto him and yet Steve was longing all the same. Longing for a man he could never have.

“Even if I did think he was charming, what could come of it?”

“Probably flowers and poetry, right?”, Dustin said.

“Knowing him, really flowery poetry at that. And poetic flowers”, Robin added.

“You two are forgetting something though”, Steve said as he came back over to sit. “Eddie isn’t just Eddie. He’s a king. A king of a country I’m meant to fight at that.”

Robin groaned and sat on Steve’s other side, dropping the book onto the table. “I thought you let that go.”

“I have!”, Steve said quickly. “I have. That doesn’t-that doesn’t matter to me the same way anymore. But the world isn’t just the two of us.”

“What’re you saying? Are you worried about the rest of us?”, Dustin asked. “We might rib you but if you actually like Eddie, we’re not gonna string you up for it.”

“He has an entire kingdom to care for. And I don’t think the rest of that kingdom would be so kind as to forgive me and allow me to court their ruler.” Even if Eddie reciprocated, the announcement would make such waves that civil unrest was all but promised. And Steve couldn’t do that. He couldn’t risk that. Maybe if he still had his full status as a prince they could spin it as a political alliance. But at this current time, tying himself to Steve would have no advantages. 

“I think you’re imagining things”, Dustin said.

“I think you’re over exaggerating them”, Robin said. 

Steve had talked about it all he could and sent Dustin off to bed before going off himself, leaving Robin to her fireside reading. Eddie wasn’t an option. He just wasn’t. And to remind himself of that, Steve kept going out to meet lovers in town.

-----------------

Eddie curbed the jealousy in his gut when he saw Steve ride out to town. He didn’t own the prince, nor was he entitled to his affections. No, the problem wasn’t when Steve went out. The problem was how he pushed the curfew later and later. But the real problem didn’t start until the night Steve didn’t return at all.

Part 24

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[lover-of-mine]

Hiiii Anna 💕💕💕

What an episode!

I wanted to talk with you about the symbolism of Eddie driving the car and not Buck and what it might represent for their relationship. Have we ever seen Eddie driving Buck (aside from the ambulance during the lightning arc) or has it always been Buck driving Eddie?

The way I interpret this is The person driving represents them being in control, more sure of themselves in the relationship.

Eddie was driving not Buck. We see Eddie looking fondly at Buck when he leaves and also the way Eddie handled the conversation with Buck in the car. Eddie also reaffirmed Bucks place in his life for him and even called their relationship“this thing we have going on between us”

Could Eddie in the drivers seat represent him feeling more confident in his feelings than Buck? Whereas Buck is just starting to make sense of them? Representing them being at different points in their feelings journey?

It’s just so interesting to me because Buck has usually been the one in the drivers seat, the one to “lead” in a relationship per say or make grand gestures. Meanwhile Eddie is taking on this role of sorts here, being more collected than Buck

Hopefully that makes sense, what are your thoughts? :)

-❤️🪐

Hi darling!

Okay, the whole Buck always driving Eddie is an exaggeration created by the fandom because we see Eddie coming out of the passenger seat of the Jeep on 412 and I'm pretty sure that's it. It's a fandom thing, we don't see them in cars together for us to be like "oh Buck's the one who's always driving" we don't know that we assumed it, passenger princess Eddie is 100% a fanon thing.

That being said, I think it's very important that Eddie is the one driving Buck in that moment because of the context of the scene because Eddie driving gives Buck the chance to panic. Buck needs the safety to panic, his sister is missing he needs the the ability to not focus on the road he needs to be just able to fall apart in the passenger seat and that is what letting Eddie drive accomplishes. Buck's allowed to have his little crashout about everything that's happening because Eddie is giving him that space.

And you know that I will always be a defender of the idea that Eddie's a lot more aware in his own feelings for Buck than Buck is on his feelings for Eddie because Eddie knows how important he is to Buck, he questions it sometimes, like on 809 but he is always put in a situation where he gets the confirmation that yes he's not overestimating their relationship. He knows he matters to buck and that moment in the car is also about Eddie feeling the confidence to admit that he's also not happy with the move, that moving is not something that he's doing lightly. He keeps glancing at Buck as Buck talks and he's letting Buck get it all out but he stops looking at him and he looks conflicted when he finally admits that it's not nothing. Eddie's driving the car in this sense is also a lot about the way that Buck needs the space to fall apart to reach a point where he's secure enough in his relationship with Eddie, in his own feelings for him to do something and he's waiting for a Buck to work it out because as long as Buck doesn't work it out, Eddie can't look at it either.

It's also part of the why I am assuming that Buck is going to spiral into his feelings and Eddie's is going to settle into them. Buck going to hit denial hard and Eddie driving allows him this feeling and gives him the space to panic.

Buck does the grand gestures, yeah, and he controls changes in the relationships, but people always clue Buck in into what he's supposed to be feeling, I think the thing here is Eddie letting Buck feel whatever he needs to feel to settle.

[buddiebeginz]

Saw this ridiculous thread on twitter that really deserves to be taken apart so lets go:

First of all while it's obvious that Buck is attracted to T*mmy (and at this point likes him a lot considering they're now dating) in 7x04 the the main person who's attention he was trying to get was Eddie's. I did an entire breakdown of that ep btw for anyone who is still confused about what was really happening there.

------

1.

Buck goes to see Maddie after the basketball incidient and this is how the conversation goes

Maddie: You didn't mean to hurt him did you?

Buck: I don't know. I was pissed you know. Seeing him and T*mmy being such good friends after only two weeks. I felt left out and I guess I was trying to get his attention.

I know that you B/T shippers desperately want to see 7x04 as Buck sent the entire episode being super smitten over T*mmy but that is just not the story that show is telling. The entire conversation that Maddie and Buck are having in this scene prior to T*mmy even being mentioned is about Eddie. Buck and Maddie are talking about Eddie's injury and how Buck thinks Eddie won't want to talk to him after what he did. The focus is on Eddie. Also it doesn't make any logical sense for Buck to be so upset and emotionally invested over some guy he barely knows. He's upset because he thinks Eddie his best friend can so easily replace him in his life.

------

2.

You're defending T*mmy because you say he left the date not wanting to pressure Buck...yet he almost outed him in front of Eddie (someone T*mmy knows is important to Buck). By the time they were on their first date T*mmy already knew how new all of this was for Buck and how nervous he was, I mean the man was talking about how he was an ally ffs while he was on a date with a guy. And while Buck's comment about finding some hot chicks was embarrassing and I get T*mmy not liking it he should have had a little more understanding given where Buck is in his journey. Instead he made it worse by making that crass closet comment.

It's also just plain rude to go on a date with someone and then ditch them in the middle without making sure they have a way home and without any real explanation (I'm not talking about more extreme circumstances like your date just being an ahole btw). Sure T*mmy told Buck he didn't think he was ready but that was really all he said. Buck was likely left feeling like he was being punished for having a moment where he acted out of fear. T*mmy could have shared an Uber with Buck and talked to him on the way home and they could have seen if they wanted things to continue. But it was like at the first sign of Buck needing more support he bailed.

------

3.

My personal feeling on the first kiss is that T*mmy really should have given something of an indication of his intentions before he kissed Buck.

Speaking as someone who is bi if I was into another woman and they were giving off the kind of vibes Buck was I wouldn't just jump in there and kiss them. I know they try to make everything more sexy for tv and it's the oldest trope in the book to have the hot guy grab the main's face and lay one on them but given all of the signals Buck was sending out T*mmy really should have gotten more confirmation beforehand.

I'm not accusing T*mmy of anything and clearly Buck liked the kiss and it was also clear in that loft scene he was attracted to T*mmy. Still the vibes he was giving off were also really nervous an unsure and he talked about Eddie 90% of the time literally moments before the kiss. Why jump in an kiss someone who seems that nervous and probably is into someone else? I don't know it's just issues I have with that scene.

----

4.

When it comes to a lot of the discourse I see around between Buddie shippers and B/T shippers I feel like a major difference is in how we perceive the show. I feel like a lot of B/T shippers mostly just take the show at face value. If something is written a certain way and presented that way to you on the screen you take that as exactly what the story is saying but you're missing the more subtle messages in the writing.

Like the whole scene with Buck, T*mmy, and Eddie in the karaoke bar had a lot going on beyond just what the dialogue was saying and it was likely missed by those who weren't paying attention.

Yeah T*mmy was on call and yeah that could be a reason why he didn't dress up. Although as many have pointed out there's plenty of things he could have worn that would have made it easy for him to quickly change and get to work and still put an ounce of effort into something that was clearly important to Buck.

But the not dressing up wasn't even the biggest issue it was that when Buck seemed hurt by the fact that T*mmy didn't care enough to dress up T*mmy was just like it's not that big of deal get over it (in the demeanor with which he responded). Obviously it was just a silly bachelor party one Chim didn't even show up to and no one else even dressed up for it (besides Eddie) but for me it's another red flag showing that T*mmy doesn't listen to Buck and doesn't have his back like a (potential) partner should.

Also you can defend T*mmy all you want but very deliberate choices were made with this Buddie and T*mmy scene. They chose to have Eddie arrive first and call a lot of attention to what he was wearing. Right before they had T*mmy come in and have that whole convo about his lack of costume to Buck.

Multiple times in the episode they pointed out that Buddie were wearing a couples costume and that Eddie is the one who picked it out. Not only were they matching in the bachelor party outfits but if you look at their outfits in the later scenes while looking for Chim they're coordinated like spouses there too.

They chose to have Eddie be the one to stay with Buck when everyone else left. They chose to have Buddie partying alone when they could have easily had T*mmy there. Especially when you consider this is a much shorter season every scene and every ep means even more than it would in a normal season. If they were trying to build B/T and get the audience to warm to them showing them partying even showing B/T partying with Eddie would have been a great time to do that instead they only focused on Buddie.

-------

5.

I'm happy for B/T shippers that you got your kissing scene at the end but here's what I saw. In a very overstuffed episode they chose to have a ton of Buddie stuff including having Buck and Eddie show up together multiple times while everyone was out looking for Chimney. Meanwhile B/T got one small scene (which included Eddie) in the beginning and one kiss at the end away from everyone else (that immediately cut to Eddie and Chris). The kiss didn't even feel like it's main purpose was to further develop the B/T relationship, it felt like it happened more to serve Buck's bi storyline so he could come out to everyone.

Also others have pointed this out but just because B/T have physical chemistry doesn't mean they have romantic chemistry. They seem like very different people. Too different in my opinion. In what little scenes of conversation they've actually had I just see two people who won't be compatible long term.

Juxtapose that with Eddie and Buck and just how much alike they are while at the same time being so uniquely themselves. How they're able to call each other out when they need to like when Eddie pointed out how it was maybe not the greatest idea for Buck to come out at his sister's wedding.

You can dislike Buddie and ship B/T all you want but you can't deny how all Buck and Eddie have to do is stand near each other and they exude chemistry and compatibility. People who don't even watch the show assume they're together and there's not even one scene of them kissing. Yet the main reason people ship B/T is because they're two hot guys who've kissed twice. There is no other real point of substance there. Now tell me again which fandom is guilty of fetishization here?

----

6.

You can call us the delusional ones all you want but EVERYTHING is screaming in your face that T*mmy isn't going to last forever. I don't even care if he comes back for season 8. T*mmy and B/T have a giant ticking clock over them and sooner or later their time will be up. There is no way Tim, the writers, ABC, Ryan, Oliver, etc would pass on the phenomenon that Buddie will be once it goes canon. The show already gets a ton of attention just from talking about the possibility of them going canon. Every single article where they even mention Buddie gets attention.

It's hilarious to me that you say the actors and showrunners are what rooting for B/T? In all the the interviews they talk about Buddie now. Tim literally was saying he cares about Buddie too in his response to a fan the other day. He literally said he included Buddie scene specifically for our fandom. Oliver is always posting and liking stuff related to his scenes with Ryan and Buddie. When Ryan gets to do interviews he gushes about Buddie and Oliver. Meanwhile B/T which is supposed to be the canon ship in this important queer storyline they're doing barely gets mentioned. Let me know when that same energy is being given to your ship.

[wannabanauthor]

This weekend is going to be my self-care weekend, so so will focus on relaxing and daydreaming about BuckTommy (something I do damn near everyday).

I saw someone’s post that Buck needs to acknowledge his anger and hurt from the breakup, Eddie leaving, and Bobby almost leaving.

So what if Buck decides to confront Tommy (in a sincere way), and they get to arguing about the breakup.

Then Buck shouts, “I was in love with you, and you broke my heart because you were scared!”

And there’s a record scratch sound, and Tommy freezes.

“Wait, you’re in love with me?” Tommy asks. He looks confused, scared, angry, and guilty all at once.

And the fight goes out of Buck. “I wanted a future with you, and you said no.”

And Tommy is definitely picking up on the past tense Buck is using.

“I didn’t know,” Tommy says, which honestly makes things even more confusing because Buck doesn’t know which part Tommy is replying too.

“Well, now you do. But I already know your answer because you gave it to me when you broke up with me,” Buck replies.

And that becomes just as confusing because which part is Buck talking about: Tommy refusing to progress their relationship or Tommy confessing that he wanted to be Buck’s last partner.

Okay, now I think I understand Kendrick Lamar’s gift for triple entendres in his songs. He’s a genius.

Back to BuckTommy:

From this argument, it can go to a second chance slow burn romance that Tim and the writers could drag out for the rest of the season.

Maybe Buck admits that he misses Tommy and wishes they could have at least remained as friends after the breakup, but he sees how that wouldn’t help either of them.

So this time, he’s the one that leaves, and Tommy is left heartbroken and confused.

Months go by, Buck and Tommy both go on independent journeys to heal themselves and figure out what they want out of life.

They both date around occasionally.

Next thing you know, it’s been six months, and they run into each other at a firefighter bar.

They both look happy and comfortable with themselves, and they reconnect as friends.

It’s a rocky start, and there are rules and boundaries. They don’t bring up their love lives. They don’t bring up any topic that can get too deep. It’s a surface level distant friendship. They don’t hang out much, but they do text each other on occasion.

And deep down in their hearts, they really miss each other, and yearn for the connection they had when they were together.

Whenever they see each other at various events with other firefighters, their gazes linger in each other for a second too long, and now Harbor and the 118 stations really realize that Buck and Tommy are still in love with each other.

They want both of them to be happy, so they conspire different ways to onboard them back into a relationship: blind dates, BBQs where everyone leaves early except for them, and various hobby events.

Tommy isn’t stupid, so he knows what’s going on.

Buck is just happy to see Tommy again on a regular basis.

But neither one of them makes a move, so both FireFams have to Parent Trap them back together.

And this time it’s overt and obvious: Beach Day where Buck is supposed to reach someone from the Harbor station how to surf.

Buck is shirtless and wearing very flattering swim trunks and carrying a surfboard.

Tommy was signed up to learn surfing with his coworkers but none of them showed up. He’s wearing clothes similar to the basketball game, but a deep V and his arms are exposed.

They’re the only two there, and they can’t help but check each other out.

The surfing lesson is intense. Every touch makes them freeze for a second, but muscle memory from their former relationship kicks in and they lean into the touch.

Later when they’re showering all the sand and ocean water off, they both have to make every effort not to stare at each other.

Also turns out they parked close to each other, and Tommy being a gentleman walks Buck to his Jeep.

Before Tommy leaves, he can’t help himself, and he kisses Buck. Buck immediately responds and pulls him closer while kissing him back.

Tommy ends the kiss after a minute and presses his forehead to Buck’s and tells him that he’s missed him every single day since their last fight.

Buck starts to cry and panics at the overwhelming rush of feelings that he tried to bury deep. He mumbles a quick apology and leaves.

Tommy isn’t fazed this time. He understands that Buck needs time to figure things out, so he leaves him a voicemail saying that he will wait until Buck is ready even if that time never comes.

A week goes by with no contact, and Tommy is starting to feel the same type of pain Buck went through after the breakup.

Tommy almost reaches his breaking point, but Buck finally texts him asking to talk and comes over to Tommy’s house.

They talk. About everything. No stone left unturned, no emotion buried. They lay it all out for each other, and it turns into a double confession of love for each other.

They kiss again and again, but leave it at that for the moment. Getting back together is a long and cautious process.

They take it slow for real this time, well, as slow as it can be after they admitting they’re in love.

Everything is slow and languid, but it helps establish a permanent foundation for their relationship to grow.

This time they discuss what they want out of the relationship and talk about the hard things. It’s not painless, but it’s essential.

They agree to avoid the move-in question, but they find a workaround that works for them. They take turns staying at each others’ places. Maybe one week at Tommy’s house, and then the next week at Buck’s place.

They discuss an engagement and marriage and agree that it’s what they want, maybe even kids.

They’re the happiest they’ve even been, and they’re secure in their relationship because they want the same things.

Tommy is the one who proposes first, and in true cliche gay form, Buck had also planned to propose at the same moment.

They don’t wait too long to get married because there are tax benefits and they want to start having kids before Tommy gets too old.

And on the series finale, they’re cuddled up in bed with their fraternal twin babies (boy and girl) in bassinets right next to their bed.

They get a Happily Ever After.

[azaharinflames]

Will you share your theory on what you think is happening behind the scenes of 911?

Hi, Nonnie!

Sure! As long as everyone is aware this is purely speculation, and nothing I say should be taken as proof of anything, I have no problem.

I've gone over a few things in my head, to be honest. I thought that JLH having filming conflicts could've been a major factor, and I still don't exactly disagree with that initial idea, but overall I think it was one of the things that threw TM for a loop.

Now, I've seen a lot of people theorize that perhaps Angela is leaving and that is what is causing so much chaos in BTS, but I am on the fence about this. I do think she might've asked to not have such a big role moving forward, especially if they get a season 9 (which I am also on the fence about ngl), like perhaps retiring, or just having a more laidback position training new recruits. The seeds are planted for that, not so much for her fully leaving. And it would give Angela more free time to dedicate to other projects (which, yes please. I need her in new projects ASAP).

So... (and please don't kill me for this, it's just a theory).

I think it all comes back to Ryan. And that he perhaps is leaving, or actively wants to leave. I will try to explain myself as concise as possible:

A couple of months ago there was already speculation about this. In all of his individual interviews (which were a lot, to be honest), Ryan made a point of talking about his work beyond 911 and talking about what he would like to do after 911.

On top of the individual promo, there was an uncharacteristically high amount of BTS dedicated to him and the godforsaken mustache. To the point where they threw a mustache party. And in the pics of that party, the vibes were that it was a party for Ryan, not in general.

Small thing, but Josh randomly dressing up as Eddie for Halloween. Perhaps unrelated, but I wanted to add it.

The 911 account reposting and celebrating Ryan's 100th ep, when 1. it wasn't his 100th (if we count the eps he was actually in) and 2. it was also JLH's, and yet they didn't say a thing about it. Ryan reposted that as well and the message he reposted it with was more nostalgic than anything else. Very much giving 'it was an honor to work with you, what a journey'.

I could be wrong, but I do think his contract ends this season. So, that just adds to it.

The timeline of the move to Texas. By the reactions alone I was fully expecting Eddie to leave for Texas at the end of 808, and then to be back with Chris (in a lazy way of solving their conflict off-screen) by 809-810. But the way he's currently thinking about it makes it very sus for me. As in, it can be a thing for the end of the season, and an actual goodbye for Eddie.

Of course, nothing of this has to actually happen, and it's quite possible it just exists in my brain. But this makes sense in my funny brain because then it explains why BT had to break up so soon... because they wanted Buck to feel completely isolated.

We know 809-10 will deal with Maddie being kidnapped. That alone will make Buck spiral. But if on top of that his best friend is also leaving... well, being alone just adds to the isolation and the angst. Because if Tommy was still around he'd be able to lean on him, and have him help him through this. But it seems like the writers wanted Buck fully alone for this, because sure, seeing a character never learning and being completely isolated is so much fun.

If this ends with BT getting back together, I honestly don't know. It wouldn't surprise me if Tim doesn't know. But, all in all, I wouldn't be surprised if RG deciding he's done is the thing that kinda created the domino effect.

(Also: I do not believe Oliver was telling Tim to fire Lou and end BT. Sorry. I just don't really see it. Nor do I think there were actual conflicts between actors BTS, as much as everything they're doing right now does feel a bit weird)

Anyway, thanks for letting me rant, Nonnie! My inbox is always open for ranting, venting, or discussing

Take care <3

[matan4il]

Buddie 615 meta

Before we really get into it, I’m just gonna snicker for a second over the fact that the death doula is named Natalia. Why? The name is related to the Latin term for Christmas Day, which is the holiday when Jesus was born. So the word that the name comes from is related to birth, natal. There’s a touch of irony there, that they gave this name to the girl who is not just a death doula, but who looks like she’s actually into death (who thinks dying for a few minutes is cool or amazing. I have to say, it’s not. It’s a good thing to accept death as a part of life, one that heightens life’s meaning, and help others do the same, it’s another to think that the physically and emotionally scarring experience of being dead for a few minutes is “cool”) and I think that’s an interesting tone to choose when introducing Buck’s new Love Interest. (if you’re into it, you can find more name meanings for 911 characters here) ~~

The scene of Eddie and Chris at the cemetery was very touching. It also spoke volumes on how Buck has taken the same role in Christopher’s life as Shannon. We saw in eps 611 as well as this one that Chris is hoping to be heard by the parent that life has taken away from him (Shannon for good, Buck temporarily). What I find interesting is that with the hospital visit, Eddie must understand this on some level. Even with the guardianship reveal, no one has ever explicitly referred to Buck as Chrstopher’s other dad. But he is, and moments like this cement it. We talk about these parallels, but Eddie gets to live them. He witnesses with his own eyes his son talking about Buck in the same way he does about Shannon. Eddie KNOWS what Buck is to their family unit and it’s not just an emergency guardian. ~~

Which connects me to something I touched upon in my 614 meta, Eddie’s journey. He’s supposedly been okay with dating again since 406, but in the last ep we discovered that he’s still held back by past trauma from his failed relationship with Shannon. She’s featured heavily in this ep, too. Her being Christopher’s mom means she’s a presence in Eddie’s life who will always be there. A reminder of how things can go wrong, meaning romantically, but also just in terms of how unexpected death can be.

It pained me to go from Eddie admitting in 614 that he didn’t want to be alone, to him echoing the words of their deceased vic, “We’re all gonna die alone.” That’s something I’ve heard people saying not so much regarding the question of whether there would be someone by your side when you pass away. More like, when death claims us, we all embark on that last journey into the dark unknown on our own. Whether there’s something after death or not, we’ll all discover that completely by ourselves. That’s such a deeply lonely thought, and we see Eddie trying to deal with it in this ep by not postponing seeing his parents. He realizes he was wrong to assume they got time, because death might come for us at any given moment, just like it happened with Shannon. It’s a continuation of his journey, which is obviously not over yet, but to me it’s quite surprising how this week’s ep actually joined Buck and Eddie’s with the common theme of death, but specifically death intertwined with their romantic life. I think each of them is such a fascinating character in its own right, so why the need to connect their journeys like this? I am staring at you, 911. ~~

I was happy that Eddie brought up what a bad idea it is for Buck to be dating someone they helped on a call. This has been a theme with Buck since he meets the snake lady on a call in 101, through Ali in 202, Taylor in 206 and now Natalia. In other words, this has a big, red sign al over it that says it’s doomed to fail, but our Buck is once more failing to notice that. Hopefully the rest of the events in 6b will help him learn and stop making this particular mistake, where he connects his idea of having self-worth only as a firefighter with thinking he can only be romantically desirable to those he helps on calls. ~~

I wrote in this ask reply about the insanity of how Buck and Eddie seem to always start dating again in consecutive eps. As if 911 is not unhinged enough about that, we also have Buck and Eddie being obstructive with the other guy’s dating attempts, first Buck suggesting ghosting to Eddie as a way of blowing off his date with Vanessa in 614, and now Eddie right away pointing out that it’s not a great idea for Buck to be dating Natalia.

We have seen Buddie dating multiple people over the course of almost 5 seasons now, and not a single time have we seen either man on screen approve of their best friend’s romantic partner. Almost like there’s just no one who’s good enough for the man they love so much, right? No one, because on some level, they know what we do, too. That no one else can compete with what the two of them have together. Which is why none of these LIs feel right and acceptable as partners for their best friend. ~~

I love that right off the bat, we got a reminder that Eddie knows Buck better than everyone, on very intimate levels. Just like Eddie knew when Buck was having an emergency session with Dr. Copeland back in 404, while even Bobby as their captain didn’t, we now saw Eddie knows how well Buck handles his taxes. It’s such spouse behavior. Most of us do not have best friends who keep tabs on how we handle governmental bureaucracy, right? But then the end of this ep circles back to this idea and gives us that scene at the cemetery where Eddie proves that this is true not just when it comes to the small things of daily life. He sees Buck, knows him, understands him and Eddie accepts him in every possible way. Which is why he can say that Buck has indeed been different since the lightning strike, an awareness we don’t hear from anyone else, not even from Maddie, Buck’s very close and loving sister.

It reminded me of how Buck said in 309 that Eddie can be honest with him. Then in 511 Buck repeated a variation of that, saying Eddie doesn’t have to pretend with him. In 513 and 514, Eddie got to be indeed fully open with Buck, just as this was paralleled in 612, where Buck was honest with Eddie. This ep continued to expand on this theme, with Eddie reassuring Buck that he doesn’t need to be anything for anyone. And I loved that in an ep where Buck has just started dating someone new, where he thinks she sees him better than anyone, the person who still gets him the most is Eddie, and that’s the person Buck shares himself with the most, too. There is not a single thing Natalia said to him or that he said to her during their date that can rival the intimacy of the cemetery talk. And if Buck still needs a wake up call to see that, well. I do think there’s a good chance he’ll get one, maybe even very soon.

~~ (my weekly meta posts) (my Buddie gifs) (all of my content)

~~ ~~ My tag list will follow in the reblog, please let me know if you wanna be added/removed here.

~~ I'm so thankful to the beautiful @eddiediaaz​ for the meta gifs this week! Not only did she step in when my regular giffer couldn’t do it this week, she also made so much effort to make sure the gifs are made as soon as possible, so the meta can be posted as early as possible as well. She’s just amazing and I hope everyone gives her a big round of applause! Merci, cherie!

~~ Thank you to anyone supporting these meta posts. I could never express enough how grateful I am and that they continue to exist thanks to you!

[steddiealltheway]

It’s been a while… but here’s a (long (oops)) ficlet :) tw: some blood.

 

Dustin calling after the whole mall incident wasn't really abnormal to Steve anymore. Sure, if two years ago before the whole monsters are real and they're living in Hawkins thing happened, Steve would have scoffed at the idea of some freshman boy calling him multiple times. But here he is, and, honestly, it was secretly one of the things he looked forward to - not that he would ever openly tell Dustin without some coercion. But this call is different... 

Different in the way that Dustin is screaming about Eddie Munson but not in awe. He sounds more on the verge of panicking, and if Steve didn't know better he would think the demo-somethings were back in Hawkins. But, something about a fight and Eddie needing help is the only message that gets through. 

And although it is Steve's day off and he slightly despises Eddie for no good reason, Steve finds himself racing to his car and making the familiar journey to the school.  

Eddie Munson. A loud mouth that would disrupt classes with jokes that were way funnier than Steve would ever like to admit. After graduation, Steve thought he would never think of Eddie again. Well, maybe in some fleeting ways whenever he saw a guy with long hair but... no, not at all. But then Dustin started high school and the Eddie in Steve's head and the Eddie Dustin kept talking about slowly and quickly turned out to be the same person. 

They had never directly interacted, just shared a few fleeting glances, nods, and maybe Steve had caught Eddie staring at him in high school a few times and maybe even shot him a smile. But that was only one time... maybe more than once, especially whenever Steve picked up the kids from the D&D sessions. 

But this time... a fight? What is Steve supposed to do? Was he supposed to bring ice or even show up at all? And what happens when he's forced to talk to Eddie? 

Steve takes a deep breath and runs his hand through his hair. Why is he so nervous? He hasn't felt this way since back when he first started talking to Nance. Which makes no sense. 

He takes another breath and focuses on the road. Or rather the small stretch of road slowly turning into a large parking lot. 

Steve parks and hopes that no one notices him as he makes his way inside the school. Luckily, it’s lunch time so a random person wandering around won’t be too strange. 

Steve ducks his head as he makes his way past a group of students and hopes no one recognizes the notorious fallen “King Steve.” As he rounds a corner and approaches an empty hallway Steve lets out a deep breath he didn’t know he was holding in. He does not miss this school. 

Also, where is he going? Dustin really could’ve give him more information. It’s not like he’ll know exactly where… 

Steve knows exactly where to go. In fact, he already started walking there before he knew it. He’s only been to the room once or twice when Dustin and the other kids have stayed a little too close to their curfew or the one time Dustin dragged him in telling him he “had to see Eddie’s metal setup.”  

Steve had to admit that it was impressive, but he was more interested in the blush Eddie was trying to hide behind curly hair. Not because it meant something like that to Steve. It was just… just. Just that he was confused about what it meant?  

His racing thoughts are interrupted by the door in front of him. It’s familiar not in terms of actually seeing it, but because it runs through Steve’s thoughts often. Must be Dustin. 

Steve takes a deep breath and mutters, “Why the hell am I treating this like breaking into the Russian military base?” 

A groan from the other side of the door has Steve immediately shoving the door open.  

“You can’t be in he- Steve?” Dustin says and immediately runs to Steve and wraps his arms around him.  

“What’s going on?” Steve asks, squeezing the kid and glancing around. He finally spots Eddie on the floor with a dark blanket dramatically wrapped around his shoulders. Or maybe it’s a cape. Steve isn’t sure. His head is ducked down so Steve can’t see the damage. 

“Steve Harrington,” Eddie drawls out the name, and Steve nearly shivers. “Jason must’ve knocked a few screws loose because I thought you were just a figment of Dustin’s imagination. But here you are.” He glances up and Steve winces.  

It’s clear that Jason is right-handed with the way Eddie’s face is battered on the left side. It’s not nearly as bad as Jonathan, but Eddie definitely is going to be left with a black eye. There’s a small cut on his lip that is slowly leaking blood down Eddie chin, and Steve almost scoffs because it’s clear that Eddie is keeping the drop there for dramatic effect.  

The bell dismissing lunch rings and Dustin looks between Steve and Eddie panicking. Steve squeezes his shoulder and says, “Go to class, Henderson. Can’t miss a period of learning.” 

Dustin nods seriously at Steve then turns to Eddie. “You’re sure you’re okay here?” 

“Our beloved king is here to save the damsel in distress.” Eddie cracks a smile and winces. “Yes, you are dismissed.” 

Dustin nearly sprints out of the room, but stops when Eddie yells, “Wait!” He hesitates until Dustin turns back to him. “Thank you, Dustin.” 

Dustin smiles and goes to open the door. Steve stops him by prompting, “What do you say back?” 

“You’re welcome,” Dustin huffs then runs out the door. 

“He’s going to be the death of me,” Steve comments as the door closes. “But he’s a good kid, but don’t ever tell him I said that or-” 

“Are you here to finish the job or what?” Eddie asks, his voice cracking slightly. Steve turns and takes in the way Eddie’s usual confident smirk is gone. Instead, his lips are in a tight line as Eddie swipes at the blood on his chin. His other hand is tightly clutching the blanket cape wrapped around him. The look in his eyes is fearful as if he really thinks Steve is going to beat him up. 

Steve slowly approaches him with his hands up. “Hey, Eddie, I’m here to help. I promise.” 

Eddie looks just as on edge as Steve approaches him but he doesn’t look like he’s about to run. Steve sits down in front of him and glances around. He spots what looks like a wet washcloth on top of a bag of ice. “Does Henderson have some in with the nurse or something?” Steve lightly jokes. 

“He must,” Eddie comments, not looking at Steve.  

Steve nods to himself. He doesn’t know how to act around this Eddie, he’s used to the usual bravado and dramatics. Not that he minds this timid version of him, but he just wishes he would trust him more. 

He grabs the washcloth and holds it up to Eddie’s face slowly. Eddie flinches slightly but lets him slowly swipe at the blood collecting under his lip. Steve can’t help but stare at the full lips and wonder… 

He snatches the washcloth back and shakes his head. What is up with him? He grabs the ice next and wraps the washcloth around it. He makes sure to put the non-bloody part on the bruise next to Eddie’s eye. “Looks like you’ll have a bit of a black eye but nothing too bad. How’s your head though? Any signs of a concussion?” Steve asks gently, knowing that the headache after a concussion is killer. 

“Head is kind of fuzzy honestly, but I don’t think it’s the concussion,” Eddie comments quietly. Steve glances from where he’s pressing the ice against his head to Eddie’s eyes which are locked on him. Gosh, he’s gorgeous- or his eyes…. His eyes are gorgeous. Is that weird to think? 

Steve looks back at the ice and adjusts it. When Eddie winces, Steve grabs one of the hands gripping the cape and squeezes. “Sorry.” 

“Not your fault. Well, maybe by association a bit your fault. It’s like all you jocks trade in your brain for your horseplay,” Eddie says with a bit of a sneer. He seems to realize who he’s talking to and apologizes with a quick, “Sorry.” 

Steve shakes his head. “I wish I could blame sports for all my stupid decisions, but here I am. Not that coming here was a stupid decision. I just mean… in general.” 

Eddie takes a moment to stare at him before replying. “Maybe it was a bit of a stupid decision. I don’t really think a freak is worth all the fuss especially from a king.” 

Steve groans, “Please, I hate that nickname.” 

“Which one?” 

“Both of them,” Steve says seriously. Eddie continues to lock eyes with him and squints them as if he’s looking for something. “See something you like?” Steve flirts before realizing what he’s done. 

Eddie smiles and shakes his head. “Maybe you have changed.” 

Steve shrugs and looks down. “I’m trying, man.” He clears his throat when he notices out of the corner of his eye that Eddie is still staring at him. “So, Jason did this to you?” 

“Yes,” Eddie answers immediately, tone colder than before. He glances off if recalling what happened. 

Steve pulls the ice pack away from his cheek and sets it down. He runs his thumb gently over the bruise, feeling for any swelling. “Why’d he do it?” 

Eddie shrugs. “Thinks I’m trying to steal his girlfriend or something. Not my fault he’s too much of an asshole to listen to Chrissy. Also his fault for not realizing I’m ga-” Eddie cuts himself off and looks at Steve with pure panic in his eyes. “Just, forget I said that. Please. Don’t tell Dustin or any of the kids. Steve, please.” 

Steve realizes that he’s also frozen in place at the admission. It feels somehow different from Robin’s confession. It’s like he’s filled with… excitement? As if this opens an opportunity for something more. Steve takes a deep breath and tries to sort out his feelings. Gosh, it’s all so confusing. 

“Steve?” Eddie prompts gently. 

Steve realizes his hand is still on Eddie’s face, and he’s been staring at him during his whole internal panic. “Shit,” Steve says and pulls his hand back. “Yeah, of course. I won’t tell anyone, Eddie. I promise.” 

As Eddie sighs, Steve notices the cut on his lip that’s already begun to scab over. But then he can’t stop staring at his lips, and he feels… like he needs to kiss him. 

Steve looks up at Eddie and finally realizes what he’s been feeling… attraction. He takes a moment to glance over the boy and gets overwhelmed with the realization. 

Eddie’s gaze turns concerned and he gently taps Steve on the forehead and asks, “What’s going on in there?” 

“When did you know you were into guys?” Steve asks without hesitation. 

Eddie gives him a look then glances away. A soft blush appears on his cheeks. “Uh, it was a few years ago in high school. One of my friends in my band had a huge crush on a cheerleader, and he dragged me to a basketball game. And while he was watching the cheerleaders, I realized I was too interested in a certain basketball player…” Eddie trails off as if lost in thought. 

“Do I know them?” Steve asks feeling weirdly jealous. 

Eddie snorts. “Yes, you definitely know them.” 

Steve nods and hesitates. “Is it too much to ask who they are?” 

Eddie’s breath hitches before he answers, “Yes.” 

“It’s not Tommy, is it? Or Billy?” Steve asks before he can help himself. 

Eddie chuckles to himself. “No, I think you would be more disappointed to know the truth.” 

Steve tries to think. Who would be worse than Tommy or Billy? He glances back at Eddie as he thinks. He would put more ice on his face, but it’s turned to water at this point. Steve asks another question. “What about him made you realize?” 

Eddie looks at him in disbelief but thinks for a moment. “I think it was his smile whenever he or one of his teammates scored. Everyone used to say it was the hair, but it was the smile that I couldn’t take my eyes away from.” 

Steve nearly jealously asks who in the world had better hair than he did, but then it suddenly hits him. He looks at Eddie who stares at him with that same panicked look in his eyes. Steve runs a hand through his hair and asks, “Was it…” He trails off unable to finish the question but tries to by vaguely gesturing to himself.  

Eddie’s mouth opens, but he’s cut off by the bell ringing. Instead, he just nods. 

Steve’s heart soars, and in a moment of pure excitement he asks, “Eddie, what if you were that for me?” 

Eddie’s eyebrows furrow. “You don’t mean…” 

“Yes,” Steve insists and grabs at one of his hands and squeezes. 

Eddie’s eyes search Steve then flicker down to his lips. “Then… I would ask if you would kiss this cut better,” Eddie says while pointing to his lip with that usual confident smirk. 

Steve laughs but cups Eddie’s jaw gently. He quickly looks down at his lips, and he begins to lean in.  

The door slams open as Dustin sprints in. “Eddie! Are you okay?!” He yells.  

Steve jumps back, and replies, “He’s good! Just checking on the cut on his lip!” 

Dustin looks at Eddie and asks, “Are you sure you don’t want us to go after that asshole?” 

“Language,” Steve lectures as Eddie replies, “As much as I appreciate your bravery, I don’t need to be responsible for any beat-up children. But you can grab my stuff, so I don’t get detention for skipping.” 

Dustin immediately runs to Eddie’s notebook and lunch box and starts picking them up. Steve stands up and holds his hand out which Eddie immediately latches onto for Steve to pull him up. Eddie leans in as he comes up and whispers, “I’ll see you around, Steve. Thank you for everything.” 

Eddie steps back and grabs his things from Dustin. “Off to Hell,” Eddie announces dramatically as he walks out of the room. 

“Thanks, Steve!” Dustin yells as he follows Eddie out of the room. 

When the door closes, Steve takes a moment to himself and lets out a deep breath. First, he needs to talk to Robin. Next, he needs to figure out whether to punch Jason or thank him. Maybe both.