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issaxcharlie · 4 years ago

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Owen hosts Couple tag

Pairing: Charlie Gillespie x Artist Fem Reader

Summary: We play pretend world guys✨ (I missed them, I’m SoRryyyy.) So, Charlie wants some reassurance after starting to prepare his proposal to Y/N and makes this “genius” plan with Owen to find her answers without being suspicious. (She totally knows tho) also a lot of friendship fighting between Owen and Y/N because I had to, I made myself laugh a lot so I’ll hope at least makes you smile🤧🤣Anyways, have fun!

This is also my weird and nonsense way of doing sweet @marvel-ousnesss request of the we play pretend couple to do a couple buzzfeed quiz 💖

The blonde takes a deep breath before picking up his phone and heading to the living room, where his couple of friends and roommates are on the couch. Charlie is lying down watching television and Y/N is lying on top of him with her face snuggled into his neck, he hugging her around the waist while gently running his fingers down her skin.

The plan was simple, to help Charlie plan the perfect proposal and give him an idea of what she expects from her wedding, they were doing a “Couple tag” video. That way the questions wouldn’t be as suspicious. Of course, there are easier ways but we are talking about Charlie. They convinced Kenny to call her and tell her that it was to promote the second season that is currently being filmed, and she agreed.

Charlie mentioned many times that someone else had to ask her the questions because she reads her boyfriend like an open book, so his improvisation had to be perfect to keep his best friend’s clever girlfriend out of the hook.

He decided to start the live from his room so as not to give the singer the opportunity to think much about it, so he sits in the living room and focuses the image on his friends who are not affected in the least by their positions. After all, everyone already knows that they are a couple and that they live together.

“Hello, I’m Y/N Y/L! And yes, that sexy, beautiful, adorable and talented man is my boyfriend, Charlie Gillespie.” He blushes as the memory of their first night back as a couple invades the mind of the Canadian, who had his girlfriend in exactly this position when she was, as she said, 'practicing' her introduction. Sadly, this time it will not end like that night because his best friend and about 500,000 people are watching.

“Welcome to my first edition of the Couple tag everyone! Here's my first guest couple, I know it’s not much, but I promise to find someone worthwhile next time, this is just for practice." Charlie laughs but looks nervous. Instead, his girlfriend sits down and rolls her eyes.

"I can't believe you chose him over a puppy or a hamster." The girl says to her boyfriend while laughing at her friend's offended reaction.

“I'm going to write that down in my long enemies list, but for now I have a live to lead. Okay guys, so basically I will ask them questions and I will also choose who answers them because I’m the only one hot enough to call the shots here."

She laughs and sticks out her tongue. Charlie sits down too and she takes his hand to fiddle with it. She keeps arguing for a few minutes with Owen but shows no signs of not wanting to play the game so he starts before she regrets it.

“Okay, first one is for Charlie. How did you guys met? This is actually a good one because a lot of the fans think you met on set and are like this really intense couple who started to date the very first week without even knowing each other’s last names.”

They both start laughing at the comment. The truth is that they have seen multiple posts and comments online from people judging their relationship and how fast they were going, especially when they did that last interview together and Y/N said that Charlie was taking his sweet time to ask for marriage, since for the fans they only have one year and months of knowing each other.

“We have known each other since forever. Our moms were best friends and we were born only a few weeks apart so we've always been together. We grew up as best friends and were dating before Y/N moved to New York to play Daniela on Stardust." Charlie tries to shake off the memory of the last tearful kiss before Y/N got on the plane. Hopefully he’ll never have to part from her for so long again. Sometimes he can't even understand how he managed to get through those 5 years.

"So no, we don't know each other for just one year, but 22." She adds, kissing his nose.

"Y/N, honey. I didn't ask you, don't be rude and wait for your turn." Owen says teasingly, the girl laughs and throws a pillow at him.

“Okay, rude again. Y/N, What is the first thing that he ever gave you?”

“Oh my, this beautiful valentines card! We were like eight I think. The paper is red, and it is filled with gold and silver glitter stars. Inside is a big star that has written in the middle, “My bright star, happy valentine’s day. I love you. And a lot of doodles of my favorite things, like my guitar, a microphone, chocolate, and a little Charlie. Just adorable, I still have it and to date it is one of my favorite gifts.”

The emotion with which she responds makes Charlie's heart melt. That was the first time he called her bright star, and he kept saying it to her during every audition, every performance, every practice. The exact reason not even she knows, but maybe one of these days he'll tell her.

“Rude and a liar. The 22-year-old Charlie's handwriting is horrible, the 8-year-old Charlie handwriting could only be close to a squiggle, nothing more. Oh, and probably only you had the ability to read it. I very much doubt that was beautiful."

She opens her mouth in surprise and wrinkles her nose, feigning annoyance. “I liked you more when you had a crush on me. You were nicer.”

Owen's eyes widen and he turns to see Charlie looking for help but he just starts laughing. “Wh- What are you talking about, mean girl?”

“Oh c’mon, you totally did, Ohio.” She smiles at the camara while showing a superiority face.

“Really? I already told you a thousand times, I'm from Oklahoma. But hey, how funny, forget about Stardust and audition for Funny Girl!”

“Jokes on you, I would nail Fanny Brice.”

“Man, defend my honor!”

“Bro, I can’t. You totally did, I even got worried for a second there.” It is incredible to think about how their friendship has grown and matured over time. They went from Owen fangirling every time he saw her to being really good friends. All these fights are more of a show than anything else, the truth is that when nobody is recording they tend to be very cool around each other and the three of them have quite a pleasant dynamic now that they are living together for the show.

“I won, Idaho. Now, please continue.”

“Well, my friends embarrassed me on my own live. I can already imagine the headlines tomorrow. Anyways, Charlie, Would you let yourself in danger to save her?”

Charlie starts laughing as he drops his head on the girl's shoulder. "I think she's not going to let me lie, I always have and will continue to do so. For me it's always her safety first."

"Which has given me more than a scare but he's so freakin stubborn." She adds while looking stressed and Owen can't help but imagine all the situations Charlie must have put himself in before.

“I prefer you scared than in danger, beautiful.” He grins and kiss her lips, her facial expresions relaxing at his touch.

“Gross. Y/N, do you prefer a small wedding or a big wedding?” She can feel Charlie tense at the question, so she leans her body back to support it against him and give him a lowkey reassurance.

“I hadn't really thought about it, but I know that my almost mother-in-law has been planning it all her life so you should check with her.”

His mom. Y/N is right, as always. His mom is their biggest shipper and the wedding is probably something she’ll want to be an importart part of, maybe way more than with his brothers since she adores the girl as much as her own kids, and the fact that his girlfriend is even more aware of that fact than him makes him smile.

“Do you love it when someone refers you as ‘her boyfriend’?”

“Always. Especially if it's her. She has that little knack of saying it whenever she can and it’s the most adorable thing in the world.”

“Oh I thought she was just showing it off to me because she was intimidated by our chemistry. I don't feel so special anymore.” Charlie chuckles and sends a secret air kiss to his friend, who just smirks and fakes to blush.

“How would you handle it if you thought another man was hitting on her?” Owen asks the guitarist raising an eyebrow.

“She usually takes care of that situations, her method is to take me by the shirt and kiss me hard on the lips. I’m never going to complain about that.” Charlie says smirking and blushing.

“We are a celebrity couple, for better or for worse. I’m not having him in a fight when I can just kiss that beautiful lips and solve the problem.” Charlie smiles as he wraps his girlfriend in his arms, so she can't see his face with the next question.

“What do you dream of your marriage? Mmm, let’s go with Y/N.”

“Anything will be perfect if I spend it with the man of my life. My Char is my everything and my biggest dream is to live my whole life laughing by his side.” Owen pretends to vomit as Charlie fills her with kisses under the ear, clearly moved by her answer.

“Let’s get to someting less cheesy because I really can’t with you both anymore. Has anyone ever tried to break your relationship?”

Charlie rolls his eyes and thinks for a moment. “Yes. We were like seventeen, and this guy from hockey had this big crush on her, so he tried to flirt with her many times even though everyone knew she was my girlfriend, until one day that he made her too uncomfortable and things escalated between him and me. Luckily my brothers intervened before something else happened because he was much bigger than me. I would have totally lost.” He chuckles while his girlfriend turns to see his face and gives him another sweet kiss on the corner of his lips.

“Yes guys, they are this annoying all the time. How do I survive? A lot of yoga. Next question, If three guys are standing, and you have been blindfolded, then how would you recognize him? Guys we actually did this like three days ago on set.”

“It was awesome! We put my bandana on her eyes and since it had my smell she couldn't be guided by that to choose.” Charlie explains excited.

“We got the three of us, first Jeremy then Charlie and then me in front of her, then she began to lightly touch Jer's hand. Then she went to Charlie's, it didn't take her a minute to recognize him and she took him from the hair and draw him to her lips, it was actually a pretty smooth and risky move, I’ll give you a point for that, prodigy brat.”

“Char's body inadvertently reacts to mine. It was pretty easy to tell the difference, especially after touching Jeremy's hand.” She turns her head to give Charlie a soft kiss on the lips and then Owen starts laughing like crazy and telling her to come see a specific comment.

She gets up and goes to sit next to him, Owen changes the camera so that now they are the ones in the image and she begins to read aloud. “Charlie I could give you my... Oh my god!” Owen continues laughing, resting his head on his friend who simply watches the screen in shock.

“Thank god Charlie doesn’t know how to read.” Owen, who was just recovering from his giggling fit, laughs again as Charlie giggles and sticks his tongue out at his girlfriend.

"Who needs to read when you look this hot with sleeveless shirts." He jokes while winking at his partner, which seems to melt in front of the camera that is still pointing directly at her.

“The man has a point. Okay, Y/N move your ass back there I’m still in charge of this show. Would you prefer a silver or gold ring?”

She makes sure to move off the screen and sticks her middlefinger at Owen before heading back to her place with her boyfriend. “Good and really random question.” She smirks, not making contact with her boyfriend. “I don't have a preference, but I would love Char to design it. Obviously with the correct guidance, but yeah he choosing every detail and then explaining to me why he choose it would be the dream.”

Charlie smiles. He was already imagining something like this after so many years of gifting and has already been visiting the jewelry store several times to make sure he designed the perfect ring for his girl, a slight feeling of pride filling him.

“Which series does she thinks resembles your relationship?”

“She loves Boy Meets World and see a lot of us in Cory and Topanga. I can totally see it too, after all they too have known each other their whole lives and have a bond as strong as ours.”

“Well that explains why she’s always telling me ‘Life is though, get a helmet’ instead of actually help me.” She grins at the memory of Charlie’s last prank on Owen a couple of days ago, it was really good since she secretly helped him plan it.

“Man, It wasn’t personal. I do the same with Char. I’m not going to be known for being the one ruining prank war. Take it to the end of the road, if you need me to take you idiots out of jail I totally will... eventually.”

“My girl, everyone. Isn’t she awesome?” He watches her adoringly and she blushes in response, buring her head on his neck.

“She always has this enormous energy and personality but all it takes is for you to see her for her to melt, that’s... kind of cute actually. Okay next question Stardust, What about If Charlie tells you to marry him tomorrow?”

For the thousandth time that night Y/N can feel Charlie stressing out. The fact that he planned together with Owen and Kenny all of this just to make sure he was on the same page with her is the most adorable thing in the world.

“I’m pretty sure he knows I would always say yes. He could have gotten on a plane when we were 18 and told me ‘I don't want to be without you, let's get married.’ And I would have said yes. He’s my person, I have nothing to think about, I have always known it’s him."

Now it's Charlie's turn to melt, and Owen himself can't help but smile.

Charlie's confidence in what he has planned is higher than ever, and the day when he can finally make it official is near. He has been dreaming of this day with his Y/N for years and he will finally get it.

“Well guys, that was it, give it up to my favorite couple of dumbasses and please stop asking obvious questions. Will I be Y/N’s maid of honor? Of course I will. Oh, and tune in next week to see me becoming Kenny’s new favorite after I challenge Y/N in a dance duel with I got the music. Golden star is GOING DOWN."

Thank you for reading✨

NEXT PART HERE

Taglist: @writerinlearning, @ghostofmgg @strangerthanfanfiction713, @thebloodthirstyvampress @kinda-really-lost, @kcd15, @magnet-girl, @aliandthephantoms, @stxrkspidey, @pinkrockstar19, @s0uz4s, @shycupcakealissa @cookiebuba, @fangirlangioma, @sageellsworth05, @twist3dtinkerbell, @sunsetcurvenotsunsetswerve, @caitsymichelle13 , @ifilwtmfc, @luckylouiebug, @bibliophilewednesday, @totomoshi, @siennanoelle01, @lunashadow6955, @bookfrog247, @morganayennefertyrell, @kiss-themoongoodbye, @rachelle3musicals, @imsydneywalker, @really-dont-forget-it @agentstarkid @talksoprettyjjx @kaitieskidmore1 @lukeys-giggle @katie-navarro @crybabyddl @cocopuffs0211 @marvel-ousnesss @blackhood5sos @dpaccione @tuttigunner

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milenadaniels · 3 years ago

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Hi! I saw your tag on your informal buddie lap makeout poll (Which, exceptional scientific inquiry. Cannot wait to see the results. Especially if it leads you to write something...)

Anyway, what is your thinking on lonestar and a potential buck +e ddie sex scene? (FWIW, I don't watch LS. I tried, but just could not. Not yucking anyone's yum, just didn't work for me.)

Curious what you think?

Thank you! The study is going well, I look forward to analyzing the results in depth!

(Please note: after three hours of writing out this response, I realize I may have misunderstood your question 😂 If you meant "what do you think a buddie sex scene would look like given tarlos", please let me know and it would be my genuine pleasure to describe that in great detail. What follows is not that.....)

I have been thinking about the potential of a buddie sex scene more than I ought to, I'm sure. You could say I've been a smidge preoccupied since realizing all the legit sex scenes in the show happened in season 1/early season 2. In seasons 3/4, the closest I think we've gotten to textual sex is Madney having sex to induce labour and that consisted of Maddie throwing her shirt at Chimney from off-screen.

Someone on that post (can't find it now of course) said that 911 Lone Star took over the original 911 later time slot and thus took over the ability to have sexier content.

As someone who hasn't watched a television show live in like 5 years, your ask has prompted me to do actual research to confirm this 🤓 According to pogdesign, 911 currently plays Mondays at 8pm and 911LS plays at 9pm which supports the theory.

That said, it kind of strikes me as weird that 8pm is considered too early for sexy content? But maybe I'm just out of touch with cable television??

So I did more research! So much research omfg this took 3 hours of my life. 😅

First we define the issue at hand

I'm defining a "sex scene" as a scene that involves two or more people mackin' on each other with any of the following:

the beginning of clothing removal onscreen

the movement towards a bedroom or bed

getting into someone's lap as a sign of escalation

post-coital pillow talk or cuddling

actual shots of naked skin and writhing (softcore porn essentially)

So 911 got moved to 8pm. Do any other 8pm shows have sex scenes?

CW - The 100 🔥 (I know there was a minimum of 2 wlw sex scenes, though they may have been post-coital)

CW - Riverdale 🔥🔥 is another teen show that I don't watch so I youtubed "Riverdale sex scenes" and I'm led to believe at least one couple is banging semi-onscreen well into season 4 (it has 4 seasons???)

NBC - Chicago Med 🔥, a procedural show not about teenagers and seems to have a least 1 couple with sexy scenes (the other Chicagos air at 9pm and 10pm) and I saw lap sitting for a hardcore makeout for the other couple!!!!! TIM TAKE NOTES!

NBC - Superstore 🔥, a half-hour comedy that played at 8pm on NBC, did have at least this one cut-away sex scene

So 2 teen shows, 1 procedural and 1 comedy all had something in the way of "sex scenes" while airing at 8pm.

But what if Fox the network is the sex-scene-killers??

Apparently Fox literally has only 5 scripted dramas of which the 911 is one and the others are:

The Resident 🔥🔥, a medical drama that plays at 8pm as of season 2 (9pm for season 1) and the main couple seem to have several sex scenes, but interestingly from what I can glean from YT, they may have stopped after s2 (though the couple stays together until at least s4 from what I can tell)

LA's Finest 🚫, a rebroadcast through Fox, it airs at 9pm and YT didn't show me any sexy scenes

Fantasy Island 🔥🔥 which plays at 9pm and looks to have sexier content based on the trailer

911: Lone Star 🔥🔥🔥 which plays at 9pm. Tarlos have had like 2 heavy makeouts/implied sex scenes plus a pretty hardcore-for-tv sex scene in the s2 finale

So it seems like even for Fox, the 8pm timeslot isn't necessarily what's vetoing the sex scenes in 911. But just to hammer that home, I did even more researching into the watershed hours, which is apparently the designated time broadcasters can show sexiness, but in the US that's 10pm to 6am so if the restrictions were such that they couldn't show any sex scenes before 10pm, Tarlos wouldn't have gotten that finale action (thank you, IRL bff who watched 911LS so I didn't have to!)

TL;DR - a summation of our findings

The 8pm timeslot is not the sex-scene-killer I once thought it was (see: all them filthy shows)

911 being a cop show is not a sex-scene-killer (see: dramas, procedurals and comedies all had sex scenes)

Fox is not anti-sex in their 8pm scripted dramas in general (see: The Resident)

Fox is not anti-sex homophobically (see: Tarlos, Hen/Eva)

However!! There seems to be a somewhat weird, somewhat isolated trend of Fox shows either cutting off or tapering off sex scenes (see: 911, The Resident) after 2 seasons or specifically after 2019.

So what are the theories (from least to most favourite)?

Theory #1 (Buddie loses 🚫): "Something" happened at Fox in 2019. The Resident is the only true analogue to 911 as it's also on Fox, also premiered in January 2018, also started at 9pm but was moved to 8pm (in season 2, not season 3 like 911). If my very brief googling can be trusted, The Resident saw a lot of sex scenes in season 2 (at 8pm) but after 2019 there isn't much to write home about. That lines up with what we've seen in 911. If something happened internally at Fox that changed broadcasting guidelines for 8pm, then canon Buddie will not get sex scenes unless the timeslot changes back.

Pros: It would be a hell of a coincidence wouldn't it?? Both shows airing around the same time, both stop showing sex scenes around the same time???

Cons: It's pretty weak, I can't find anything that supports "something" happening in 2019 that would affect an 8pm timeslot but not the 9pm one.

Theory #2 (Buddie loses 🚫): Sex as a short-term sales tactic. Fox uses sex in the first two seasons of shows to boost ratings and get people hooked because sex sells. But then, for whatever reason, they taper it off. If so, Buddie being canonized would not produce any sex scenes as we're far removed from season 2.

Pros: The Resident and 911 both stopped showing sex scenes after season 2 from what I can gather

Cons: If sex sells, why wouldn't it keep selling all the way to the bank?? There's no reason to stop something that's working.

Theory #3 (Buddie wins 🔥): Actors are the roadblock. Fox is fine with sex scenes at 8pm but the actors aren't comfortable! If so, Buddie sex scenes could be in the cards as both actors have had on-screen sex scenes previously.

Pros: Angela Bassett, Peter Krause and JLH are bigger names and they presumably get to not get naked on screen or simulate sex scenes if they don't want to. Aisha Hinds as a (criminally) smaller name wouldn't have had that kind of leverage in season 1, nor would Ryan Guzman in season 2? And Oliver Stark knew what he was signing up to to play a self-diagnosed "sex addict" so.

Cons: This is absolute, complete conjecture. I have zero idea what each of their comfort levels with sex scenes are or how that might relate to the writing/direction of their characters.

Theory #4 (Buddie wins 🔥): Stable canon relationships kill sex. Fox dramas use sex only pre-maritally to build relationships and the network or the showrunners/writers decide it's not as important once characters are in stable relationships/married. If so, we will get Buddie sex scenes as their canon relationship develops.

Pros: The Resident couple did get married post-season 2 I think? Athena stopped having onscreen sex after she married Bobby. Hen had sex but out of her marriage.

Cons: That's dumb, let married people bone. And we technically do have a Madney sex scene, tame as it was (but maybe they straddle of the line of stable but pre-marital???). Also if sex = building relationship, EddieAna have been excluded from that formula oops 😌

Theory #5 (Buddie wins 🔥): We're overthinking all of this. There hasn't been sex scenes past season 2 because the stories haven't called for it but when it does, such as the start of a new relationship, then we'll get some!

Pros: We haven't had any "new" relationships other than EddieAna since season 2 and their lack of intimacy is a glaring reminder they aren't well suited - they're not boning for plot reasons. While not strictly meeting the aforementioned definition of a "sex scene", we could use Albert coming out of Veronica's shower as a use of sex-as-relationship-building.

Cons: That's dumb, let married people bone, the sequel. Especially since HenRen is criminally neglected in terms of development and could use a fun playful sex scene.

So what have we learned?

Should Buddie go canon, 3 theories indicate we'd get some sex scenes for them, and only 2 say we wouldn't. The odds are in our favour. 🤡

I will do literally anything to procrastinate writing this damn fic that's been tormenting me for weeks. Please someone, anybody...send help...

#buddie meta #buddie #911 meta #are you also kept awake at night by the thought of canon buddie without sex scenes??#or even lap sitting makeouts????#well rest your weary head on this qualitative data analysis friends!! the future looks 60% bright!#911 reference #my posts #did you know we could add colour to text now guys?? did you know the mac keyboard comes default with emoticons??#the things I learned this night

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panharmonium · 2 years ago

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next in-progress teen wolf S5 thoughts under the cut!

[same spoiler disclaimer as always applies - i’ve only seen up through episode 16 of season 5. i’m totally unspoiled for anything that happens after that, and i’d like to keep it that way (“spoilers” for me includes things like “oh, it just keeps getting worse and worse; lower your expectations,” or various other subjective assessments of quality - i like to form my own impressions). if you’re a friend and can talk to me without dropping hints like that, have at it! otherwise, please don’t engage with this; we can talk about it once i’m finished. thanks! :) ]

4 episodes out from the end of season 5 and my biggest problems are still

up until this most recent episode, everybody was acting wildly out of character in order to force the “pack conflict” plotline. that entire arc feels contrived and unbelievable.

TOO MANY CHARACTERS. i can’t believe how many new people they keep introducing! it runs so contrary to what my own instincts as a storyteller would be - if i suddenly lost access to major characters in an unexpected and frustrating way, my reaction would be to make the story smaller and focus in a deeper way on the characters who are still there. but teen wolf’s reaction seems to have been ‘fill the holes with as many new and old people as we possibly can and then not give ANYBODY the Deep Treatment.’ expanding the cast this much stretches the story way too thin. there’s no time to actually sit with one particular character or pursue a consistent line of development for anyone. we’ve got the three death doctors, theo, tracy, hayden, donovan, chimera pack members #3 and 4 whose names might be cory and josh but i honestly don’t remember, hayden’s older sister, dr. valak (sp??), malia’s mother, plus the relatively new mason and parrish, plus sudden reappearances by brayden, chris, meredith, gerard, deucalion, PLUS the fact that we’re supposed to be following the stories of six (six?!) “main” characters? this is silly. they keep asking us to care about a hundred different things at the same time, and i don’t. if they can’t even give their “main” cast deep enough development, i’m never going to care about a bunch of characters i just met three minutes ago.

expanding the cast this much means the pacing suffers. things happen and then aren’t addressed again for many, many episodes, and you can’t tell a cohesive story like this! if you’re going to do something, you have to keep addressing it consistently until it resolves. for example - deaton is captured by the desert wolf in episode 8, and then we don’t see either of them again until episode 14. there’s no sense of urgency about his captivity, because the narrative never addresses it. putting plot points or bits of character development aside for long periods of time sabotages audience engagement, because it signals us to be like, “well, the story isn’t interested or concerned about this, so i shouldn’t be, either.”

poor kira has been done so dirty. her post-3B “development” is nonexistent, and everything they do try to do with her is so inconsistently attended to or skimmed over in such confusing ways - why? why did they ignore her throughout the entirety of season 4? why would she never have any time devoted to her learning about her powers, when she’s the only kid who actually has a parent who can teach her literally everything she needs to know? why hasn’t this been an ongoing thing since the end of 3B? everything about kira’s situation is so confusing - it feels like her parents have never talked to her about her powers or trained her (because it’s literally never been shown to happen), but that can’t possibly be the case. but if it can’t be the case, then why hasn’t it been addressed? and what happened with that S4 plotline about kira’s family moving out of beacon hills? and where was the follow-up/explanation about that scene where kira got her first tail? kira has no core character arc, which is wild, because there’s plenty there to draw from, eg - the family conflict of her mother lying to her all those years and being a major contributor to the situation that ended in allison’s death, her father always letting noshiko make all the decisions (decisions that haven’t always been in kira’s best interests), the internal conflict of kira wrestling with her position as the person who “replaced” allison (especially given the fact that she and scott are romantically interested in each other), kira feeling guilty about her mother’s role in what happened/worrying that she doesn’t fit in with the pack/feeling like an intruder or imposter...kira could have easily had an arc where she’s dealing with these things and learning about her powers in S4, and then in S5 this whole thing about her powers being out of balance wouldn’t be so out of left-field. if it was prompted by anger/imbalanced emotions (things still not right with her family) or her own lack of confidence/certainty about who she is/where she belongs (still learning to stop seeing herself as a replacement for someone else), it would make more sense.

and this isn’t even getting into the wildly appropriative mess that was the “skinwalkers” episode; honestly, WHAT.

listen. i love gerard. he’s my favorite teen wolf villain. and i liked deucalion, too. but bringing them back like this was the wrong move, and when i think about it for too long i want to start throwing things, because it’s the star wars sequels syndrome all over again. WHY CAN’T WRITERS EVER RECOGNIZE WHEN SOMETHING IS OVER. why are they incapable of recognizing a good and appropriate ending - one they wrote themselves, even! deucalion has a great conclusion - the restoration of his sight (literally, but also metaphorically, as someone who was blinded by rage/revenge but now might be able to see a better way forward), and him being given a chance to do better (“my mother told me you were a man of vision once. we're letting you go because we hope you can be that man again.”) his story has a satisfying, totally appropriate ending. bringing him back like this (even if he’s faking his antagonism against scott in order to escape the chimeras and ends up helping our side; i have no idea what the plan is for him) is the wrong move, because once a story is truly over, anything added to it can only undermine what came before.

general frustration - this show used to be about a group of teenagers who were trying to graduate from high school and navigate family relationships/friendships while dodging supernatural stuff that got in their way, but now it’s about full-time crime-fighting superheroes who very occasionally make appearances in a school building (usually after hours). the show doesn’t care about their normal lives anymore, and that was the whole reason why i liked it so much in the first place. i thought we were getting back to that in the first couple episodes of this season, with the AP Biology class thing and stiles’s anxiety about going off to college etc, but all of that was unceremoniously dropped in favor of the Big Dramatic Plot.

this is a minor thing unrelated to storytelling, but - why in god’s name is everywhere SO DARK? literally, every single scene is shot like there are no lights on. it’s not a plot point (it’s not happening in places where the power is out), it’s an artistic choice, and it’s a bad one.

so many people have been let in on the secret now (or are starting to suspect) that at this point i’m starting to wonder if this season is going to end with some kind of a community-wide mindwipe. the dread doctors do have technology that makes you forget you ever saw them...i don’t understand how else we’re going to come back from this one.

Last thing (I mean, there are other things, but this is the one that’s on my mind after the last two episodes we watched) - I have weird feelings about what the show may or may not be trying to do with Stiles and Lydia’s dynamic. It started earlier in the show when Scott and Kira had that conversation that was like “those two...they’re good together”/“he still likes her, doesn’t he?”/“yeah, but it’s different now” and then it’s kind of continued with the framing of Stiles’s reaction to her being injured by Traci and then obviously this entire Eichen House rescue...

I can’t tell what they’re doing, and I think whatever it is would be more effective if I knew. The thing with Stiles and Lydia for me is that if you asked me which potential romantic relationship on this show I was most compelled by, they would definitely be it - which is rare for me; I usually don’t care about any of the romantic dynamics in media I watch. But I also would be completely happy for this show to end without them ever having another romantic moment together. The development of their friendship is equally compelling to me, and I’ve especially always loved how Stiles never pursues her after S2, not even after Jackson leaves, not even after Lydia kisses Stiles in the locker room, because she keeps on seeing other people, and so it’s like - she’s not interested, as far as he knows. And he literally never brings it up again, and they still become closer and closer friends regardless.

But now the show has started this weird dynamic during the “pack conflict” arc (which was contrived OOC nonsense to begin with), wherein Malia and Stiles have barely interacted and it’s like neither of them notice or care...which is OOC nonsense in its own right, because Malia has always been written as totally smitten with/attached to Stiles in a way that defies her trouble navigating other non-coyote relationships (“remember we talked about this - rules of the wild kingdom don’t apply to friends”/“i would never leave you behind - them i would leave”). I do buy the idea that Malia could possibly get consumed with a revenge quest against her mother and temporarily start neglecting her relationships, but I don’t buy it the way it’s being executed here - the minimal Desert Wolf stuff we’ve gotten has always felt completely disconnected from the main plot, as if it belongs in another season - it feels like a teaser for a different storyline instead of an organic part of this one. And it’s so superficial - the fact that we never see Malia’s father, or her relationship with him? It’s so poorly done, and I don’t buy it as enough of a reason for her to start pulling away - if that’s even what the show is trying to do, because it’s being done so badly that I can’t even tell if that’s the intention of not.

There’s also a moment when Malia tells Scott (re: Stiles) “We sort of broke up,” which was super bizarre, because they didn’t. That literally never happened. They have a conversation where Malia is like “[the thing with Donovan] didn’t matter to me” and Stiles is like “it matters to me,” and then he gets out of the car because she’s giving him a ride to go talk to his dad - but they didn’t break up? There was no discussion about them not being together anymore. And I can’t tell if the show wants us to accept her false statement at face value because they’re trying to force Malia and Stiles apart, or if they want us to be like “that was a really weird thing for her to say; that never actually happened; I wonder if she’s misinterpreting what’s going on because of her still-growing social skills.”

But taken in conjunction with the fact that the show then keeps putting this emphasis on Stiles and Lydia, especially in the Eichen House episodes - I just feel weird about it. Like - I imagine there are shippers out there who were crowing about this shift when it was going on, but for me it’s like - how can you enjoy something when it doesn’t make sense? I never want “my thing” to happen at the cost of narrative integrity; I want things to happen that are natural and organic. If something isn’t written in a way that makes sense, then I can’t consider it good, whether it “benefits” a relationship I’m compelled by or not.

I don’t think shippers always make this distinction, but whatever. I don’t judge story elements based on whether I “like” them or not, I judge them based on whether I think they’re narratively appropriate and written in a way that makes sense. Do I “like” Stiles and Lydia having lots of meaningful screentime together? Of course, I always do, and that’s not even the problem; they can have that as friends, too, but when it’s happening concurrently with a Malia-Stiles separation that feels forced and unnatural, I don’t appreciate it the way I normally would.

I also feel like - this is such a picky thing, but for me, the end of the Eichen House rescue episodes was less effective than it could have been, because the story couldn’t decide what its focus was going to be. If the writers really wanted to end it with Lydia telling her mom “He saved me. Stiles saved me,” then Stiles should have been the one who actually did the essential work of saving her. They had the right set-up for that initially - everybody in the pack had a necessary job, but Stiles, as the only human, was the only one who could pass the mountain ash barrier, so beyond that point, he would be on his own. And I liked that a lot - it was reminiscent of the rave episode from S2, where Stiles has to be the one to place the mountain ash barrier outside the building. But as things actually play out, Stiles doesn’t end up doing much at all. The importance of him being the only one who can pass the mountain ash barrier is undermined and negated first by Theo crossing it, and then by Parrish destroying it. Theo is the only one who can actually find Lydia in the tunnels, Parrish is the one who stops her scream from killing all of them, and Deaton treats her injury before it’s too late. So for Lydia to then end this arc by saying that Stiles saved her rings hollow to me - it doesn’t feel earned, even if the musical selection during that scene was a song I love, and even if I finally got to see Scott, Stiles, and Lydia onscreen by themselves for a change, which is the focus I’ve wanted ever since 3B ended.

#i understand that the plan itself was probably generated by stiles after he stole the keycard #but lydia doesn't know that #and if they really wanted the focus at the end of this arc to be stiles and lydia #then they missed a perfectly set up opportunity to strand stiles on his own and make him figure it out himself #(which would also more effectively tie in to his dad saying that in order to feel better after taking a life you might have to save one)#and if they instead wanted it to be a group effort (which it WAS) then they should have just had lydia tell her mom 'my friends saved me'#it's a focus issue #the writers want to have it both ways #but that makes everything they do weaker/far less effective than it would be if they would just commit to something #but anyway moving on #only a few more episodes to go!#teen wolf #pan watches teen wolf

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keets-writing-corner · 3 years ago

Text

I need to guuuuuuuuuuuuuush

I’m absolutely obsessed with Owari No Seraph/Seraph of the End. It has everything I want in a story

okay this got long so I put a cut

A romance I’m actually invested in: 1) it’s gay, like not even ambiguously gay, like very explicitly gay and it’s remarkable 2) it’s somehow enemies to lovers, best friends to lovers, and childhood friends to lovers ALL AT THE SAME TIME 3) the mutual pining is ridiculous, but manifests in “I MUST PROTECT” 4) omg they’re so devoted to each other???? 5) heavily implied in the anime and manga that they are each other’s reason for living after their trauma

Ambiguous characters: 1) we’ve got not one, not two, BUT THREE HIGH RANKING CHARACTERS within their respective organizations with THEIR OWN AGENDAS, screw whoever gets in their way 2) one of the said lovers from above pairing? Technically, he’s officially on one side, but he makes it very clear he actually doesn’t care about anyone EXCEPT his love interest and actively goes behinds people’s backs all the time to get what he wants. He has exactly 0 trust except for his love interest, which means he’ll literally fight both sides to make sure love interest is safe 3) THE FREAKING QUEEN, at first she’s like in a terrible one sided relationship with one of the characters with like... uh what’s it called? Power imbalance? Like she is 100% in control of this other person because they are wholly dependent on her, and she knows it, and often calls this other person her pet, and like, you think you’re supposed to hate her because she’s one of the contributing factors to the other character’s trauma but then it’s like, wait, actually, maybe she ALSO has ulterior motives and is one of the few people said character can actually trust with their wellbeing and their own interests being the only one who actively helps them with it 4) HMMM THAT SUPER SHADY DEMON/HUMAN ROMANCE YOU KNOW THE ONE IM TALKING ABOUT

Characters that suffer: okay listen, all of the characters have suffered through trauma, but special shout-out to Mika who has gone through my favorite kind of trauma to watch that develops characters. Spoilers for the rest of this paragraph so if you want to check out the show skip over it. okay gone? for real? you okay with getting spoiled if you haven’t seen yet? alright. last chance. Okay so first thing we know about Mika is that he’s an orphan and has a found family with his orphanage group right? even when they’re all being held captive by vampires underground, he at least has his family. Mika goes above and beyond to make sure that despite that they’re essentially just acting as the vampires’ blood-stock that their time there isn’t as bad as it could be. He offers himself up to one of the nobles, saying the noble can suck his blood if he gives him things, so he gets stuff like actual real food for his family to eat. In the manga, you can see that this is really draining on him, but he does it to see his family happy. Mika also knows that his crush absolutely hates it there, so he plans an escape, except oops they all get ambushed by the very noble he stole from and was swindling, and literally everyone gets killed in front of him except his crush, well I guess at the time he was too young for crush, so I’ll just call him Yuu. Anyways. Mika and Yuu manage to knock out the vampire noble working together, but Mika is fatally wounded so only Yuu actually escapes. AND THEN MIKA IS FORCIBLY TURNED INTO A VAMPIRE BY THE QUEEN, like he hates vampires, he considers them monsters, he doesn’t want eternal life or whatever, AND SHE FREAKING TURNS HIM TO KEEP HIM FROM DYING (the way she does it too could be considered traumatizing as well) and then he proceeds to be raised by people he considers monsters and hates that he’s become a vampire, and like does everything in his power to not drink human blood (resorting to drinking the Queen’s blood, and she’s fine with it cuz it keeps him completely dependent on her) like MMMM THAT POWER IMBALANCE IN A WORLD FULL OF THE MONSTERS YOU HATE WHILE BECOMING ONE YOURSELF IS ALREADY DAMAGING ENOUGH, and then he finds out that the very adults he used to trust as a child, were actually just treating him and his found family as guinea pigs and lab rats and that the only people who actually cared about him was his found family, who are all gone except for Yuu who isn’t there, so yeah oops, he hates humans now too. Like mmmm that is some tasty juicy angst right there. It manifests in him never smiling anymore, never speaking, just sitting there stoically. Like this was the little boy who was happy smiles all the time, either when he was genuinely happy with his family or putting on an act to deceive and he’s just so broken after the timeskip that we never see him smile until late in season 2. OH LETS NOT FORGET THE WHOLE VAMPIRE THING RIGHT? Mika doesn’t want to drink blood, but his body compells him to. He refuses to at least drink human blood, which works for a while but by the time the second season rolls around, the queen’s blood just isn’t cutting it anymore and there are so many scenes where his instincts take over and he almost bites someone only to snap out of it last second and start sobbing because he believes he’s becoming a monster. AND THAT’S NOT EVEN ALL OF IT, JUST THE THINGS THAT I LIKED THE MOST TO WATCH

spoilers over

the side characters: While I do think they could use a little bit more development, but that’s probably because they’re not quite rubbing me just the right way like Mika is, so they pale by comparison BUT there are some things I enjoy 1) we’ve got a literal troll on the team. I’ve seen some people call her annoying, but omg I love seeing her troll the others. also she uses a scythe and it’s awesome 2) OMG THERE’S A SWEET BABI BOY ARCHER??? slight spoilers, but my favorite part was when he reveals that his demon decided to give him more powers because he treats his demon like a friend, and talks to it at night before going to bed, sometimes asking it what it’s favorite color is?? 3) okay okay okay, listen, I already like the character by himself, the sniper dude, he’s already great as he’s written. But then add the fact that not only does he look EXACTLY like Victor Nikiverov from Yuri on Ice, BUT HE HAS THE SAME FREAKING VOICE ACTOR TOO that just cracks me up 4) I love the one vampire side character who keeps trying to befriend Mika, and Mika just keeps stonewalling him 5) honestly the queen is really badass, and as much as I hated her at first, I actually enjoy every second she’s on screen 6) There’s a vampire called Crowley and idk what it is with him but he just gives me “Big Fun” vibes even though he’s one of the most ruthless characters in the show

plot and arcs: it doesn’t drag itself on and on and on, it actually completes goals and important benchmarks fairly quickly so we don’t need to keep waiting on things to happen. But at the same time, is so drawn out that you still can’t help but feel like it’s taking forever to get to where you want it to go and it’s great because it means you get so much story to enjoy. Also, the fact that the protagonists always have one clear goal at a time, but us as the viewers see other things happening behind the scenes, without always understanding what they are, and we’re stuck seeing this collision path where everything is gonna intersect and you know it’s going to be terrible and there characters are going to suffer but you love that.

anyways, Seraph of the end is super good, I loved it, the anime isn’t enough so I’m actually chasing after the Manga for once. Mika is officially one of my all-time favorite characters and he deserves to be happy. If you know what I’m talking about cheer with me, if you haven’t seen it yet, omgggggggggggggggggggg GO CHECK IT OUT IF ANY OF THE THINGS I SAID APPEAL TO YOU

#seraph of the end #owari no seraph #Mika #Mikayuu #I'm gushiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing #I'm obsessed #send help #I watched another anime a while ago that a similar sort of gay romance going on #and i really wanted to like it because I loved the premise behind it #I really did #but it was so badly executed that I could only watch it ironically #THEN I FIND THIS #AND ITS SIMILAR PREMISE BUT DONE IN ALL THE WAYS I COULD EVER WANT #also omg the music is amazing #half the joy for me is the music #Do you guys have any idea how hard it is to get me to ship??#anyways this has consumed my life for now

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recurring-polynya · 3 years ago

Note

For the Renji birthday prompt: A fic where Renji discovers that he can't go tits out anymore now that he's married (maybe with some jealous Rukia thrown in perhaps)?

I maintain that the new tits-in regime is self-imposed; I present to you my thesis. (I did not attempt to take on The Vest; I assume it came later, and I eagerly await more Vest Lore from Kubo himself)

Warning that I sincerely hope deters absolutely no one: This fic is about boobs. It contains many, many synonyms for boobs. Some of them are rude.

Read on ao3 or ff.net

---

“I’m telling you, you’re jumping to conclusions. Sometimes he puts them away when he fights. He told me this.”

“I haven’t seen them in weeks.”

“It’s been winter.”

“That has never stopped him before. And it’s April now. Open season. And yet…?”

“I think we should just ask him.”

“You can’t just ask a guy, ‘hey, where did your tits go?’”

“I could, but I refuse. Abarai’s aesthetic is his own business.”

“Since when?”

“Okay, he’s here, someone’s gotta do it.”

“Not it!”

“Also not it!”

“Matsumoto, you have to do it. You’re the one who talked him into letting them hang out in the first place.”

“I agree with Yumichika. Renji knows what he’s doing, and if he has decided that the puppies are off-limits, that’s on him.”

“Hey, guys!” Abarai Renji’s cheerful voice rang out over the din of the bar. “Sorry I’m late!”

“Just means you have to catch up quick!” Rangiku declared, pouring him some sake.

“No missus tonight?” Shuuhei asked.

Renji’s entire face went pink and he got the same moony look in his eyes he always got whenever someone mentioned his wife or his marital state generally. “She sends her regards and says I’m supposed to drink extra for her. She goes over to the Manor on Wednesday evenings now to hang out with her brother.”

“Have you actually managed to call him by his given name yet?” Iba asked. “Now that you’re related?”

“His given name is ‘Captain’ and I call him that all the time,” Renji replied snottily.

“So. Renji,” Izuru said, leaning forward on his elbow. “Are you doing something different? With your look? I feel like there’s something different about you.”

Renji’s face lit up. “You noticed!” He swung his head around, his long braid swinging over his shoulder. “I’ve started braiding it!”

“Oh, no, it’s permanent?” Yumichika moaned.

“That’s not new,” Iba scoffed. “You slept with it like that the whole time we were roommates. I just figured that you didn’t have time to fix your hair in the morning anymore because you were too busy taking care--oof!”

“It looks very nice, Renji!” Momo said sweetly, extracting her elbow from Iba’s rib cage.

“It’s different,” Renji glowered at Iba. “I braid it loosely at night to prevent breakage and lock in moisture. This is an action braid.” He wheeled on Yumichika. “And I’m only French braiding it for now, because it’s shorter in front than in the back, you know, because of the accident. Once I’ve grown it out to all one length again, I’ll just do a regular braid.”

“You could just cut it to the length of the shortest part and go back to the pineapple hair,” Ikkaku suggested. “I always liked the pineapple hair.”

Renji turned pink again. “Ah, well. Rukia likes it long.”

“Yeah, I don’t think the braid is… what I was thinking of,” Izuru soldiered on.

Renji sucked his teeth thoughtfully. “I got a new tattoo? A pair, actually.”

“Oh! Did you?”

“On your chest?” Shuuhei asked hopefully. A healing tattoo would be a good excuse to cover up.

“Nah, on my thighs.”

Izuru sighed. “Since when do I look at your thighs, Abarai?”

“I have good thighs, Izuru.”

“He probably just looks different because he’s so happy now,” Rangiku suggested. “By which I mean getting your back blown out every night.”

“That could be it!” Renji agreed cheerfully. “Oh, I was wearing a scarf for a while there, when we had that cold snap! Is it the scarf? Or maybe the lack of scarf? It’s a nice scarf, Captain gave it to me for a wedding present. He says a man of quality should own a scarf.”

“I give up,” Izuru sighed.

“Hey, jocks, what’s going on?” a new voice interrupted.

“Akon!” half the table chorused and Renji scooted over so Akon could slide in next to him.

“Glad you could make it!”

“Yeah, sorry, I had an experiment I wanted to get finished up.”

“We were just talking about how there’s something different about Renji,” Shuuhei pressed.

Akon surveyed Renji for a moment. “Well, he’s got his tits tucked in for once. Aren’t you hot? You told me once you did that for ventilation.”

“That was very much a lie,” Renji clarified. “And I’m a married man now, my cans are closed for business. Speaking of which, Rangiku, fill ‘er up again, please, I’ve gotta keep up my wife’s reputation.”

---

Momo couldn’t believe this was happening to her. Out of their entire friend group, she was pretty sure she was the least interested in Renji’s… bosoms. There was a time… long, long ago when she had thought he was pretty hot stuff. She still counted him among her closest friends and favorite people, but had long ago come to the conclusion that big and beefy just wasn’t her type.

“Why, Lieutenant Hinamori! What brings you to my office?” Acting Captain Kuchiki Rukia leaned back in her chair, steepling her fingers. She must have been practicing, because the last time Momo had seen her do that, she had nearly fallen backwards out of the chair.

Momo sighed. “I have to tell you, this isn’t business.” Not exactly. It sort of was, in the sense that Shuuhei and Matsumoto (who apparently did care very much about Renji’s chest situation, so long as she wasn’t the one who had to confront him about it) had come over and dramatically draped themselves all over the Squad 5 couch and complained about the dreary state of affairs to Captain Hirako until he ordered Momo to go do some investigating.

“Good, because I have been filling out Nanao’s new skills-inventory-for-seated-officer forms all morning and I’m about to lose it,” Rukia said with an overly cheerful grin.

“We could go out to the yard and fight?” Momo offered hopefully. Maybe she could tell Captain Hirako that she got distracted and forgot to ask about Renji.

Rukia’s face fell a little. “Er, I’d love to, but I really shouldn’t today. Sentarou just made me this pot of tea, though. Do you want some? It’s lemon ginger, it’s really good.”

“Sure,” Momo agreed.

“So what’s up?” Rukia asked again, once Momo was perched in the guest chair, a fragrant cup of tea cradled in her hands.

Well, might as well just rip the bandage off. “I need you to know that I was put up to this by… you know. The idiots. The cowards we go drinking with.”

“Understood,” Rukia agreed.

“There is… some concern… about your husband.”

Rukia’s eyebrows shot up. “My sweet pumpkin pants?”

“I’m leaving,” Momo announced.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” Rukia waved her hands, laughing. “I’ll be serious. What has that lunkhead done now?”

“This is so dumb,” Momo muttered. She cleared her throat. “He’s stopped going around with his bazongas hanging out all the time, and everyone’s losing their minds over it.”

Rukia stared at her. “Excuse me, his what?”

Momo made a vague gesture at her own chest. “You know. His… boobies.”

“That’s what I thought you meant,” Rukia nodded, her brow creased in thought. “Bazongas. I like that.”

“Not that I care!” Momo excused. “I mean, I agree, he should be allowed to dress how he likes, but you two seem to have a very equitable relationship and I said that I was sure he wasn’t doing anything that he hadn’t agreed to--”

“Hold on,” Rukia interrupted. “You think I had something to do with this?”

“You didn’t?” Momo asked. “He said he was keeping them tucked in because he was married now. We assumed it was at your request.”

“I didn’t even know!” Rukia replied. “I mean, I came home yesterday, and he was just--” she made a hand gesture like she was pulling her kosode open, “--completely out--”

“I don’t need to hear this,” Momo begged.

“Well, I tell you I had nothing to do with it,” Rukia assured her. “No one is more supportive of Renji acting slutty in public than me. Everyone knows I have that locked down, and honestly, it just makes me seem more powerful.”

Momo squeezed her eyes shut. “I’m going to punch Shuuhei so hard.”

Rukia rubbed her index finger over her chin. “It’s possible this came down from Brother…”

Momo whimpered, although, honestly, having a conversation with the other Captain Kuchiki about Abarai’s pectorals couldn’t possibly be more awkward than this.

“...or it might be… something else.” Rukia frowned. “I’ll talk to him, okay?”

“You will?” Momo asked hopefully.

“Yeah, I’ll take care of it. I can’t promise to bring the jugs back, but I’ll make sure it’s just Renji being a doofus and not Renji hiding his anxieties under aesthetic choices or Renji being oppressed by his brother-in-law.”

“Thank you, Rukia,” Momo said. Rukia could be bossy at times, but it wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. “Sometimes, Renji has to be bullied into taking care of himself.”

“You’re telling me!” Rukia exclaimed. “Thank you for caring about him,” she added warmly.

“For the record, I care about him,” Momo replied. “Everyone else just misses the view.”

“Noted,” Rukia replied.

---

Renji had his nose stuffed in his cookbook, which lately, wasn’t a good sign. Renji only owned one cookbook, an encyclopedic tome that he only cracked open when he was trying something new or otherwise wasn’t sure what he was doing.

“I hope you aren’t making that kale curry again,” Rukia noted dryly.

Renji jumped three feet in the air. “Aaah, shoot! Rukia! I didn’t hear you come in! I’m so sorry!”

Rukia hopped up on her kitchen stool and leaned across the counter to give him a kiss. “We’ve been married for four months now. You don’t have to greet me at the door every single day, you know.”

“Sixteen weeks, three days,” Renji replied. “And I can still be sorry about it.”

“Just tell me we’re having something normal for dinner, and I’ll forgive you,” Rukia replied.

Renji jerked a thumb toward the stove behind him. “I made oden,” he explained. “It’s simmering, probably’ll be another ten minutes.”

“Ohhhhhh, I love your oden!” Rukia stretched her arms across the counter and did grabby hands at his hands until he laced his fingers through hers. “Did you make enough for me to take some for lunch tomorrow?”

“Depends on how much you eat tonight,” he replied. “Your appetite’s been really hit or miss lately.”

“Yeah, well...” Rukia agreed. “So what’s with the cookbook, then?”

“Oh,” Renji said vaguely. “I’m thinking about learning to bake cookies?”

“I’m in favor of that,” Rukia agreed, although her mind immediately went back to the conversation she’d had with Momo that afternoon.

“I’m not sure this book is helping,” Renji admitted. “If I was any good at baking, it would be one thing, but it’s too different. I’ve always been better at learning stuff from other people. Do you think it would be weird if I asked Iba’s mom to teach me? She used to make these little sesame biscuits for Iba. I would always steal them from him. They were so good and he didn’t properly appreciate them anyway.”

“It would absolutely be weird, and I think you should do it anyway,” Rukia proclaimed. She paused. “But maybe you could wait a few more weeks until we tell everyone we’re pregnant so all your friends will stop asking me what’s wrong with you.”

Renji’s eyes widened. “Did your brother say something last night? Because he told me he liked the braid!”

Rukia snorted. “No. He’s worse than you are anyway, he’s been reading books. Please make him stop, if you can. Actually, I’ve been getting complaints about,” she circled a finger in the vicinity of Renji’s chest.

Renji glanced down, and realized that his kosode was still neatly folded up to his collarbone. “Oops, sorry! I told you I didn’t hear you come home.” He immediately began untucking it.

Rukia leaned her chin on her palm, watching his progress. “I realize that making emotionally constipated people face their feelings is usually your department, but it seems you’ve got something heavy rattling around in there. Wanna talk about it?”

Renji’s eyes slid to one side. “Talk about what?”

Rukia cocked an eyebrow and waited.

Renji heaved a sigh. “Do you remember that time, back in Inuzuri, the first time I used my reiatsu in public? When I blocked a lead pipe with my arm?”

Rukia almost choked. “What do you mean, do I remember it? Of course I remember it.”

“Well, not so much that, but do you remember afterward, when you said I was too big and mean to be a sneakthief anymore? That it was better to confront the world and show it what we were made of?”

“I do remember that. I did not call you mean.”

“You probably didn’t. It’s probably just something I thought about myself.” He looked pensive for a moment. “In any case, it was something I really took to heart, especially after we split up. At first, I just wanted to make myself as big and loud and scary as possible. I liked the way people shied away from me. Later on, after I started hanging out with Yumichika, I realized that walking around sexy could be intimidating in a different sort of way, and I liked that, too.”

Rukia had a comment for that, but she decided to just listen, instead.

Renji smoothed the page of his book with his fingers. “I don’t want to look scary anymore.”

“You don’t look scary,” Rukia reassured him. “You haven’t looked scary in a long time.”

“I want to do better than that, though,” Renji frowned. “Has your brother ever talked to you about his dad?”

Rukia blinked, surprised, mostly that Byakuya had talked about Soujun with Renji. “A few times.”

“I, uh, asked him what his dad was like. Since I never had one myself. I expected him to either blow me off or start bellyaching, like he does about his granddad, but he didn’t. He said his pop was very gentle and kind. He said he was a good dad.”

“Byakuya loved his father a lot.”

“Yeah, that was pretty clear.”

“I hope he finished by saying what a good father you will make, but it’s my brother, so I’m sure he didn’t.”

“He said something about how he was sure I would proceed in my own way.”

Rukia sighed again. “Renji, you’ll be a great dad. It’s super obvious. I’ve only told half a dozen people that I’m pregnant and all of them who aren’t Byakuya have immediately reacted with ‘Renji is going to be such a good dad.’ You don’t need to change anything about yourself.”

Renji sucked his teeth for a moment. “Well, all my good dad instincts are telling me our kid is gonna wanna fight the world bad enough as it is, that the last thing they need is a dad who wants to fight the world, too. I’ve fought the world long enough. I’m probably never gonna be gentle, but I can try my best to be kind, and I can dress like a normal person in public for a change and… maybe I can make a cookie? It’s worth a try, I think.”

Rukia flashed him a sad, but fond smile. “You’re such a dork. A sweet, thoughtful dork, though, and I will support your experiment, even though you know I love your bazongas more than anyone.”

“‘Bazongas��? Oh no, did those assholes make Momo come and talk to you?”

Rukia shrugged and tried to look innocent.

“Anyway, you’re my wife, I will take them out for you whenever you want.”

“Yay!”

Renji furrowed his brow into its “determined” configuration. “Do not get me wrong. I am actually upping my chest day routine. I am going to keep them immaculate, and when my shirt gets ripped off in a fight, people are going to lose their minds over how lush my boys are.”

“I love you so much,” Rukia replied.

#renji's birthday 2k21 #my writing #this was a lot of fun i got to use all my favorite horrible synonyms for da tiddies #ok maybe not allll my faves

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floralguccistyles · 3 years ago

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all work and no play makes niall a dull boy

story page // sign up for the taglist // thoughts?

taglist: @burberryharold @niallsguitarsthings @kare36 @Niallhoranistodiefor @missy14us @potatoniall2020 @halloweenniall @ajayque @nannav47 @stayclose-holdsteady @MilitryBarbi

The Stanley Hotel. Estes Park, Colorado. St. Augustine Lighthouse. St. Augustine, Florida. The Queen Mary, Long Beach, California. Colonial Park Cemetery. Savannah, Georgia. Eastern State Penitentiary. Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.

Those were the five destinations on the SF-FunFriday Halloween merger 5-episode season. I had gotten the go ahead from Brooke and Malcolm had called only about ten minutes later. I got the impression he was wanting this to come together as soon as possible. Which was why only three days later, I was on a plane. We had already missed the first week of October, since Malcolm had only gotten in contact with Brooke a few days ago, but he was still planning on a five-week segment that would just go into the first Friday of November for all those Halloween fanatics who weren’t ready to give up their spooky sides yet.

I had only been to Colorado once during the 2016 Presidential Campaign, but I didn’t explore much, given I was in a conference room the entire time. I was excited to see a little bit more of Colorado, and I was especially excited to see The Stanley Hotel. Even though I wasn’t a huge fan of horror and I didn’t believe in the supernatural, being in the hotel that literally inspired The Shining was enough to make anyone anxiously excited.

But before that, I had to meet my co-host.

Luis was supposed to have come, but since Niall was going to be in the segments for Halloween, Luis had to pick up some of the slack at their office in Los Angeles. So, it was just myself and Niall, and about five crew members ranging from people at SF I knew to people from FunFriday that were new faces.

I sat at the hotel bar (where we were actually staying, not The Stanley Hotel, as Niall mentioned he would rather die than stay there). Niall was supposed to meet me here at seven, and it was only five until. I knew he wasn’t late by any means, but it had been brandished with a hot iron into my head that “early was on-time, on-time was late, and late was dead” by my mother. Luis and I were always freakishly early. I surreptitiously checked my watch once more, sipping on my water.

“Evangelina, right?” I heard a charming Irish accent ask. I turned in my seat, giving Niall my full attention.

He was handsome, that was for sure. His hair was gelled tonight, but not in that overly so way that made it look greasy. Luis mentioned he wanted to look good for tonight, because he probably wouldn’t bother doing his hair for our segments, given he’d most likely scream and run his hands through it anyway. Tonight he wore a white button-down with a maroon colored suit jacket over it. He paired it with black dress pants. The ensemble looked great on him, and Sabine’s swooning came back into my mind. No one certainly would have blamed her for her attraction. And even from where he stood, seven feet away, I could tell the blue in his eyes was the most intense blue I’d ever seen.

“Eva,” I replied, holding out my hand, “nice to finally meet you, Niall.”

“You s’well,” he said, giving me a crooked grin. “Luis doesn’t know when to shut the fuck up about you.”

I shrugged. “We’ve always been close.” He plopped himself down in the seat next to me, took notice of my water and nothing else, and ordered himself a club soda. “So…”

He laughed in agreement. “So… thanks for agreeing to do this. It wasn’t exactly my idea and I can’t say I’m excited, but I do know it’ll raise ratings for both our companies. Malcolm seemed really excited about it as well.”

Brooke hadn’t disclosed if she was excited, per say, but she did seem happy with Malcolm’s reasoning that it would raise ratings for both our channels. “I’m excited too. Tell me a little about the concept.”

His eyebrows furrowed. “They didn’t send you the logistics?”

“They did. I just want to hear it from FunFriday. And since you’re repping them right now…”

“The task falls on me,” he said, nodding his understanding. He ran a hand through his hair, seemingly forgetting that he gelled it. “So obviously Malcolm sent you over the itinerary because you’re here. But he wants us to just be ourselves in these places. He wanted me to do it because I don’t do ghosts. He thought it would be funny to make me go and do this since I’ll probably shit my pants at least once. He wanted to ask someone at SF who didn’t necessarily believe in shit like that, so it’ll be fun for viewers to see us bicker.”

It was basically the same summary Malcolm had told me on the phone, but with a little more language. “So, you’re actually scared of shit like that? Not just playing it up for the cameras?”

He gave me a deadpan look. “I once cried for three hours because my brother told me a restaurant we were eating at was haunted and a woman had died right where I was sitting.”

“Shitty brother pranks I can relate to.”

“Yeah, mine’s the best with them,” he mentioned, rubbing the back of his neck. He turned to face me a little more than he was, and I noticed that his knee touched my thigh. “So, what about you? You really don’t believe in the ghost shit?”

I shrugged. “It’s all just campy and funny to me. Like it’s all a show. I mean, my family celebrates Day of the Dead and all, but ghosts for horror purposes? I don’t buy it.”

“That’s so weird to me. Luis completely believes in all that stuff.”

I laughed. “Believe me, I know. He tried to scare me into believing it when I was younger, but it never took.”

He laughed, reaching for his club soda. I was oddly entranced as I watched him swallow down a gulp. Sabine’s lustful words filtered through my head. Though I had seen Niall before by watching Luis’s segments, he had a different energy to him. Initially, I had thought he was too serious for my taste, but he was holding his own well enough with the witty banter I thrived on. Perhaps working with Niall wouldn’t be the horrible, daunting task it seemed.

“So, you ever seen The Shining?” he asked. It was the first time he was acknowledging where we were going tonight. They were closing it at ten and we were headed over at midnight. Luis told me Niall had almost strangled the producer when they assigned him late nights at these “haunted” places.

I nodded. “I actually love that movie. It’s funny.”

“Funny?” He blinked at me. “The guy nearly murders his family…”

“Not scary,” I said, shrugging, “just psychological horror. Doesn’t bother me.”

He shook his head and took another sip. “You’re a mighty woman, Eva Valencia.”

I found the compliment to be endearing, so I sent him a grin and lifted my glass to my lips. After copying him and taking another drink, I asked, “what are your plans until the filming tonight?” We had about three hours to spare, and I knew that after the plane ride and dealing with the airport, a hot shower with a citrus scented Lush shower jelly was calling my name. But I was more than content to sit and talk with Niall for a little before that happened.

“Shitting myself because I don’t want to do this.”

I pat his shoulder comfortingly. “Aw, you’ll get through it. I’ll be there to hold your hand.”

Instead of being insulted, like some other men would be if I insinuated they needed me to feel safe, he just laughed. “Keep that promise in mind when I’m cutting off your blood flow. We’ll see who laughs then.”

We chatted a bit more, and I relished in the fact that I was talking to a seemingly competent and intelligent man. I talked to Luis everyday, but in my eyes he was a worm and not an actual human being, so it was nice to interact with Niall. If this was how the five weeks were going to go, I would have no problem doing this segment. He even slid money over to the bartender and paid for our drinks (Niall had somehow convinced me to get a vodka cranberry) when we were done. We parted ways to our respective hotel rooms, right next door to each other. With a promise of coming to grab me at eleven-thirty, he bid me a goodnight.

I was still in my flowy pants (that made my ass look fantastic, if I did say so myself) and shirt from the airport, but I decided to change into something a little dressier since I was going to be filmed. After a long shower with more time spent just enjoying the hot water than anything else, I dried my hair and styled it before putting on a little makeup. More than likely it would be night shooting and viewers wouldn’t even see my makeup, but it was more of a habit than anything to get ready for shooting.

Lounging around in my robe for the two hours until I was supposed to meet Niall, I snacked on carrot sticks I had bought from the little corner store around the block from the hotel. I figured what the hell and bought The Shining on the hotel’s movie section and watched through as much as I could before I had to peel myself out of the couch seat and change into the jeans and flannel I had laid out.

At exactly eleven-thirty (we’d really have to talk about his timing), I heard a knock on the door. When I swung it open, I saw Niall and a crew member from FunFriday standing at my door. Niall was dressed pretty similarly in jeans and an open flannel, a white graphic shirt underneath. I tried to hide my smile.

“Hey,” he said, tossing a thumb over his shoulder. “This is Dante.”

Dante looked like he was probably about my age, with dark curly hair and big glasses. From the reflection on them, I assumed they were blue-light blocking ones. Luis always wore those and was trying to get me to pick up a pair. “What’s up? I love Current Noose.”

I brightened even more. “Hey, nice to meet you. Thanks.”

“My mom and I watch every week. She’s from Nigeria, so you’re kinda her first experience with American politics.”

That’s why I loved working on Current Noose. “Okay, you’ve got to stop the compliments before I get an ego. You guys ready to go?”

Niall nodded and Dante led us out of the hotel. We had a big black Range Rover that was taking us to the hotel, and I slid in without a problem. Niall, however, looked like he wanted to throw up, as if the reality that this was actually happening had finally caught up with him.

“Hey,” I said gently, holding my hand out, “I can live without feeling in my fingers.”

“Ha-ha,” he mocked, but looked thankful. He took my hand and stepped into the vehicle. He didn’t release my fingers, but I didn’t bring attention to it, especially because I could tell he was trying to keep himself calm.

Because I didn’t believe in any of this shit, it was interesting to see how genuinely scared he was. My brain worked with facts and stats, something that the paranormal was not. To see his fear work in real time was a new experience. Though Luis believed in the paranormal, he wasn’t usually scared of it. He laughed right along with me when we watched scary movies.

It took us about ten minutes to drive to The Stanley Hotel, and I took this time to get to know my crew members. There was Dante, who liked Halloween and was generally believing of all the supernatural stuff, but had some skeptical nature still. He was the one who talked most during our car ride there. Jocelyn, another crew member from FunFriday, and Gabriel, someone I recognized from SF, were nearly asleep the second they got in the car. Dante regaled me with stories of Nigerian myths and folklore, which made Niall tighten his grip around my hand even more.

We pulled into the sprawling lot of the hotel and I eagerly pressed my face against the window. The hotel was beautiful, a giant white building with a brick-red roof. It didn’t look haunted, but then again, I didn’t really know what qualified as a “haunted” looking building, given I didn’t believe in that stuff. It looked magnificent, looming ahead of me with its brilliance. Even though I wasn’t a believer, I could still appreciate the notoriety of the building.

“Jesus I’m going to throw up,” Niall said under his breath while Dante prattled on. He continued to hold onto my hand, using it to help me out of the car when it came to a stop. He dropped my hand as we walked up to the front, but I could see a small bead of sweat forming on the right side of his forehead. “If I start to throw up, you have to promise me we’ll stop filming.”

I laughed, patting his shoulder again. “I promise. You’ll be fine, Niall. We’re going on a guided tour, so we’ll have someone familiar with us too.”

My reassurance didn’t seem to help him, but I saw him take in a shuddering breath as the tour guide met us at the door. Their name was Frankie and they gave us a big smile when we walked up to meet them. “Hi!” Frankie said happily, clapping their hands together. “We’re happy to have you guys here.”

“Yeah, thanks for letting us walk around past closing,” I said.

If Frankie noticed the way Niall was groaning under his breath, they didn’t mention it. “Well, I want us to start with the ice house and we’ll make our way to the pet cemetery from there.”

“Pet cemetery?” Niall asked me under his breath while the crew began setting up. Frankie chatted with Dante for a little bit, and I could hear them exchange fun haunting stories. “As in the book, Pet Sematary?”

I shook my head. “No, this pet cemetery existed before King wrote that.” When he gave me a dubious look, I shrugged. “I did my research before coming out here.”

When Dante and a half-asleep Jocelyn and Gabriel finished setting up, they hooked us up with mics and some silly ghost-hunting things, like a small camera we could take if we went off from the crew, and the EVP wrist recorder that looked like my Apple Watch. We would record the intro at the hotel later tonight, after we were all a little calmed down and had more time to sleep, so for now we were jumping right into the content. When Dante gave me a thumbs-up, I grinned.

I loved being on camera. I used to not like it as much, especially at my job beforehand, but now that Brooke had given me opportunities and I had started Current Noose, I had no problem being recorded. And even through his fear, I could sense Niall was the same. His entire posture straightened and a charming smile appeared on his face as soon as Dante gave us the go ahead.

“We just arrived at the famous Stanley Hotel,” Niall said, his voice clear and with perfect enunciation (which, as someone who did filmed segments, I appreciated). “Here with us is our tour guide, Frankie. Frankie, how long have you been working here?”

“I’ve worked here for about three years,” Frankie replied.

“My lovely co-host doesn’t believe in ghosts,” Niall paused so I could roll my eyes, “but what about you? Has working at the Stanley changed your perspective on the supernatural?”

Frankie nodded. “I’m with you, Niall. I 100% believe in the supernatural, and I’ve had my own fair share of ghostly encounters while working here. We’ll just have to try our best to make Eva believe.”

“Good luck,” I mentioned off-handedly.

“So the first thing I’m going to show you is the ice house, where residents claim they see the ghost of Billy.”

I was reared and ready to go, happily starting to follow Frankie to the ice house, but Niall took a deep breath behind me. “And...and is Billy a nice ghost?”

“He kills anyone who steps into his territory,” I quipped.

“See, now that’s not fucking nice.”

“Billy’s a little kid.” Niall shuddered even more at Frankie’s description. “He can sometimes be seen with another ghost, but more residents make mention of Billy than anything. You’ll be fine if you stick with me, Niall.”

The icehouse, where the hotel stored their ice before indoor refrigeration, had been converted into a museum. The inventor of the hotel, who Frankie called F.O. Stanley, had been in the steamer car business with his twin, so the museum had a couple of the Stanley Steamer Cars on display. Here, Frankie explained, was where guests saw the ghost of Billy.

“He mostly shows up as a blurry or misty figures in photographs,” Frankie said.

“So he’s a little bitch that doesn’t want his picture taken?” I suggested. Frankie laughed, but Niall looked murderous.

“Why the fuck would you say that? You can haunt her, Billy, I’m being respectful.”

Next on our tour was the pet cemetery. “Guests can sometimes hear Cassie the golden retriever scratching on their doors and trying to deliver the morning newspaper. There’s also a fluffy white cat named Camanche is sometimes seen wandering around.”

Niall looked like he was going to throw up. “It’s a golden retriever and a cat!” I exclaimed. “Don’t you have a fucking dog?”

“Not a ghost one who scratches on my haunted hotel room door.”

We made our way inside the hotel, a gorgeous sprawling thing. Frankie told us that The Shining was continuously played on the lobby television, and we happened upon it just as Jack Nicholson shoved his head through the door he had just hit with an axe. I gave Niall a mischievous smile. Niall ignored me in favor of listening to Frankie, who was explaining that the ghost of Elizabeth Wilson sometimes interfered with couples who were staying in the same room but weren’t married.

“She sounds like my mother,” I commented offhandedly.

“She also has been known to put luggage of single men outside their hotel room doors to let them know she doesn’t want them to stay.”

“Jesus,” Niall muttered, shaking his head.

After the anecdote of Elizabeth Wilson, we walked to room 217, the very room that inspired Stephen King to write The Shining. I was pumped up and ready to see it, but Niall looked like he wanted to fling himself out the window.

Frankie told us the story of Stephen King’s horrific nightmare and how it affected him when Dante laughed from behind the camera.

“And what the fuck are you laughing at?” Niall asked.

“I just thought...what if you guys go in there for five minutes each by yourself?”

I shrugged. “I’m game.”

Niall looked like he was on the verge of murdering Dante. “I’m gonna fucking murder you.”

It was decided that I would go first, so I took the camcorder and put on the stupid little headlight. Frankie unlocked the door for me, allowing me to step inside. It was a normal enough hotel room, nothing special. I sat on the desk chair and tapped my fingers on the desk. “How much money do we wanna bet that Niall’s freaking out right now?”

I sat in silence for a couple more minutes. However, unlike Niall, who was probably going to shit himself the entire time, I was getting bored. “Oh ghosts?” I singsonged, loud enough for Niall to hear.

“You’ve got a fucking death wish!” I heard Niall say on the other side of the door.

“Hey friendly ghosts, my friend Niall is super scared of y’all, but I don’t really believe in you. So if you’d like to show yourself, maybe give me a little scare, I’d be more than happy to participate.”

More silence. I just heard the sound of myself breathing. Dante knocked at the door, letting me know my time was up and it was Niall’s turn to enter the room. He did so only after Dante basically pushed him into the room, slamming the door behind Niall with an evil cackle.

“Our father, who art in heaven…”

“Are you praying? Are you even fucking religious?” I called out.

“It doesn’t really fucking matter to me if I’m religious or not at this point!”

Niall survived his five minutes of solitude in Room 217. When Frankie unlocked the door, Niall made a beeline to the stairs, ready to go home. I figured we had enough content for the first episode, plus we still had to shoot the intro. The crew and I followed him down the stairs and outside the hotel.

“Frankie, you’ve been a dream,” I said happily, shaking their hand.

“No problem at all. I’m excited to see what the footage looks like. Who knows, Eva? Maybe you’ll watch it back and see a ghost.”

“Don’t tell Niall that. He’s already on the verge of vomiting.”

We bid Frankie adieu and piled back into the car, where Niall immediately took a deep breath. “I’m never going back there again.”

“You never have to,” I assured, patting his hand. “But you do have to do the St. Augustine Lighthouse.”

He groaned. It was quiet for a moment before suddenly Dante shouted, “HERE’S JOHNNY!”

Niall screamed bloody murder, jumping in his seat and grabbing onto my shoulders like I was an anchor holding him down. I noticed Dante has the camcorder on and busted up laughing, relishing in the way Niall was still screaming out curses.

“All of you, fuck off!”

#m&m #1dff #niall horan au #niall horan fanfiction

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thegeminisage · 3 years ago

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top 5 moments in broken road?

i literally waited until now to answer these ask meme questions so i could do this w/o spoilers. anyway time to do an ask meme i got questions for THREE ENTIRE WEEKS ago

#5 - "my girl" john/mary reunion

Mary rushes forward into John's waiting arms. He gathers her up and holds her close, pressing kiss after kiss into her hair, tears running down his face. "My girl," he says, in aching disbelief, drawing back to cup her face in his hands. "My girl." She laughs through her own tears, and when he smooths one gun-calloused thumb under her eye she turns her face into his hand, and then he draws her close and kisses her, like they're the only two people left in the whole wide world.

look. am i valid? no. but they compel me. to them their story is just as real and longlasting as dean/cas is to us. so i added a little gutpunch to that reunion because it’s my fic and i get to do what i want >:) actually, even though i made a point of calling john “dad” and mary “mom” in dean’s pov, in this moment, i deliberately used their names - it’s more than just mom and dad, it’s theee john and mary winchester back together after all these years. no, they don’t stay that way, but after a 22-year quest in her name, it still deserves to be like a Reunion.

(other four are below the cut to spare ur dashes. there are major spoilers for the whole fic, just warning u)

#4 - john getting punched by [SPOILER]

Dean's shoves his father with all his might, yelling, "Let go of me!" Partially because even though just moments ago the dungeon was exactly where he wanted to be, he absolutely doesn't want Dad to be the one to put him there, partially because he's afraid that Michael is about to break free from that cage in his head and vaporize everybody in firing range, and partially because he's afraid that if Dad doesn't let go, Cas will kill him.

But Dean's only got one hand free, and Dad's grip is too strong. Michael and sleep deprivation have made Dean weak; he can't get away from Dad on his own.

Then, when Cas is still just out of arm's reach, Sam lays into Dad with the fiercest right hook Dean's ever seen.

Dean knows that right hook well. That's one of the first moves Dad taught him, one Dad forced him to practice a thousand miserable times—how to stand, when to turn, where to throw his weight—until he honed it to absolute unthinking perfection. And it is perfect: Sam nails Dad right on the jaw with all six feet and change of muscle, sending him staggering back, his grip on Dean slipping free.

Dad slumps against the wall for a moment like he's literally seeing stars, like it's all he can do not to pass out. His nose looks like it might be broken. Dean rounds on his brother; if he was expecting Dean to thank him for that, he's going to be disappointed. "What the hell, Sam?"

But Sam's looking at Dad, not at Dean. "He said," Sam pants, "to let go of him."

i’m normally very anti-punching john, but i feel like if anybody has the right to do it, it’s sam. he’s spent his whole life being protected from john by dean and he finally gets to return the favor! all his problems are solved because he’s literally the bigger man now in every way! i doubt sam would ever punch john on his own behalf, but it is UTTERLY in character for him to do it in defense of someone else, but i bet it was pretty fucking cathartic too. picking sam moments in this fic is like picking children but this...you know, it wasn’t even in my outline. it happened organically as i wrote. and it just. feels right.

#3 - sam telling john to clean up his mess

"Seriously, Dad—we've had enough of your lip service. You're sorry? You want to help? Clean up your mess."

What? John frowns. Does he mean Dean?

But, no—Sam twists and picks up an actual mop and bucket from the corner behind him. The bucket is full of red-tinted water. "Go in the kitchen," he says, "and if Dean says you can use the sink, run some clean water with bleach. We gotta get the blood off the floor, because the longer it stays there, the worse it'll stain—especially on the hardwood."

"Uh," says John.

Then Sam gives him a severe, no-nonsense look that nearly punches the breath from John's lungs—because for the very first time, he sees his Mary in that stubbornly unimpressed face. "Do you understand? This isn't a motel. You can't expect someone else to do it for you. Don't go in the kitchen," Sam says slowly, enunciating every word, "unless you're going. To clean up. Your mess. You want room service—there's the fucking door."

THERE’S THE FUCKING DOOR. i love this bc firstly i believe in man of the house sam and secondly it falls into the same thing of like...sam is finally big and strong enough to protect dean and by god he will make himself an impassable 6′4 between this man and his brother. i think especially since finding out about flagstaff, DOUBLY since becoming a parent, sam is like...so less than impressed with john’s bullshit, and even more impatient than he already was of john’s stupid excuses.

there’s also this motif of cleaning throughout the fic - in john and sam’s very first scene alone together, they are washing dishes. at first this was a nod to sam and dean doing it in lebanon - dean washing, sam drying - but washing is the “hard” part of doing the dishes; when my mom taught me how to do them i began learning by drying first. so of course dean has been washing and letting sam dry all their lives - almost literally, because john talks pretty early on about dean being a neat freak too, because john simply wouldn’t pick up after himself but still hated the mess. there’s a few mentions of it in the fic, how john liked being able to leave a mess behind in their motel rooms, how he’d prop his feet on the table - but in season 10, it’s sam on his knees scrubbing the bloodstained floors after dean’s murder spree, and in broken road sam makes john wash the dishes, and at the end, sam makes him mop. @maulthots put it best:

like that’s it. that's literally it. and then, finally, john offers to clean up on his own without being asked. that’s Growth™, at least in whatever way he’s capable of it. at any rate, he’s too afraid of getting hit again to NOT clean up after himself lol

#2 - dean/cas car scene [content warning for nsfw and discussion of past sexual violence - scroll down to #1 if you’d like to skip it!]

Cas lets go of Dean, but it's to reposition his hands on Dean's knees, slide those huge palms up Dean's thighs. Dean feels the heat of them bleeding through his jeans. Then, holy shit, Cas rests his thumbs on Dean's belt buckle, and makes eye contact.

Dean wets his lips, a little uncertain. He has no idea what Cas is going to do. "Yeah, okay," he croaks.

Cas leans in and kisses him again while he undoes Dean's belt. Like—fuck, like he knew Dean wouldn't want to watch. Dean hears the zipper on his fly, and all at once it clocks that, yeah, okay, this is really happening. Heart thudding in his ears, Dean reflexively lifts his hips so Cas can pull his jeans off. But Cas only slides them down a little. Then he reaches into Dean's boxers and gets a hand around his dick.

Oh. A small, quiet noise drops out of Dean into Cas's mouth, and he turns out of the kiss, panting as Cas pulls him out of his clothes. He's not sure what he was expecting, but this is okay. Just a handjob—he can handle that. It's good, actually. A little dry, but Cas has a light touch, and Dean has decided that he likes Cas's hands. He knows the shape of them very well.

i really enjoyed writing this whole scene, but this was my favorite part. cas technically does get dean’s consent, which was important to cas and a little bit of a big deal for dean too, but dean didn’t ask what cas was going to do before giving that consent, because he almost...doesn’t care? like, dean’s previous experiences with men were all lousy at best, and violent and traumatizing at worst, and arguably none of them were 100% consensual. so part of him is figuring that whatever happens will be within that spectrum, and he’ll just deal with it being awful no matter what it is because he almost literally can’t picture it not being awful. he's not doing it because he likes fucking men or expects he’ll like fucking cas, he’s doing because he wants to be close to cas, he wants to be away from michael and his dad, and because if he and cas are together now that’s part of the package and he’s just done the full “for keeps” commitment bit, so he’s not gonna pussy out now, right? he trusts cas not to actually harm him, and be closer to “lousy” than “violent,” but he is, in his mind, basically giving cas consent to hurt him, because to him that’s what sex with men IS. and he’s understandably pretty nervous because he doesn’t know what’s going to happen - all he’s sure of is that he won’t like it.

but then he does like it! he likes it a lot! trusting cas turns out to be the correct choice! because if cas had turned him down in that moment, trying to baby him or second guess him, i think dean would have felt really hurt and angry and embarrassed, he would have felt like he was broken or untouchable. which is why cas took him at his word, but ALSO did pretty much the most tame thing you can do and still count it as having sex. so cas managed to thread the needle perfectly because he knows dean so well and he’s literally been inside his mind and witnessed that trauma and knew everything to avoid doing. so for dean it wound up being TRULY consensual instead of the sort of fake consent he’s used to handing out to johns. if that makes any sense. idk i just really enjoyed doing it. i think a valid reading is that dean has this physical fear of men that is just...not explored very much in fic. and it was nice to write something where cas was sort of able to undo or heal a little of that damage.

#1 - michael

No, no, no—we can't die—we can't die, we are eternal, we are our Father's most beloved, His favorite son—

No no no no no no no no no—I can't die—I can't die—

Light fills the room, reflecting in Dean's eyes making them look as though they glow. And for the very first time, John sees him. John sees him, John sees him, John sees him—

Where is my Father? Is He watching? Can He see me?

Father, help me, I beg You—please, I don't want to die—

I don't want to die—

i could honestly paste the entire michael scene here, there’s not a thing about it i don’t love, but this was probably my favorite part. and look, i waited NINE YEARS to see michael!dean, i deserved to go apeshit!!! i think the fun thing about michael is that he’s a great foil to both john and dean, the literal connecting tissue, especially when he’s hopping bodies like that. he’s dean’s aggressor but he’s also dean’s twisted reflection, nearly broken by his father’s absence. it was impossible for john to see dean as he really is until michael let him see it through dean’s own eyes.

and then “i” at the end - i knew going in that i wanted a “we” pronoun (though i almost chickened out of it), because michael’s in charge but he’s also making his vessel do things with him, like laugh or scream or hurt people. but when michael dies, he’s alone figuratively and literally, because john’s not dying with him, and his own father has forsaken him too - and that’s the way dean so often felt, and FEELING that was probably the only thing that could possibly give john the motivation to be even slightly less self-centered and shitty.

michael was my whole reason for writing this fic - because i was livid they didn’t use him to tie dean and john together in canon, because the burden of being his vessel is just one more thing dean had to take...this whole chapter, this whole fic, hinged entirety on the batshit insane dynamic between michael and dean and john. and like there are parts of this fic i was insecure about and wished i could have done better, but this? i think i nailed it. definitely the part i had the most fun writing.

but like, honorable mention?

"Dude," Dean says, flipping on his blinker so he can pull up beside the local grocery, "can we not do any touchy-feely shit, please? That's—"

"Gay?" Sam suggests.

"Get out of my car."

>:)

#liz answers asks #deanwinchestergender #broken road #br meta #supernatural #spn for ts #ASK MEMES #technically

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ianenjoyer · 4 years ago

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an overly detailed analysis of every time Ian and Mickey talked about loving each other bc I love pain and angst apparently

1. “You love me, and you’re gay.” -Ian, 3x09

So right off the bat this one was always the most shocking to me. Throughout the season, there were definitely hints that they were falling in love with each other/already in love but the fact that this is the first time we actually hear it hurts me so much. Especially because Ian was so sure. He wasn’t asking Mickey if he loves him or begging Mickey to love him. He just... knew that he did. This scene is so raw and painful and real because you just see two kids who are desperately in love with each other, but not allowed or able to show that in a healthy way, so they just end up lashing out at each other.

2. “You try sitting on your ass while the person you love--” -Ian, 3x11

Like I said: pain. So before, we heard that Ian knows Mickey loves him, but I always thought it was interesting that he focused on that instead of telling Mickey that he loves him. Because he does, and he definitely knew that. I think this speaks to Ian’s tendency to compartmentalize and only think of his emotions in terms of other people, which he does consistently throughout the show. So here we hear him admit it, but not to Mickey, and only because he’s drunk out of his mind. Ian is just one of those people that constantly keeps things bottled up inside and only deals with them when he reaches a breaking point, which he definitely did in this episode (and we see the fall out of this in 3x12).

2.5 (bc i forgot it the first time) “You love Mickey?” -Carl, 4x11

So I do think it’s really interesting that he says “I like how he smells” here instead of just saying yes. I mean I do think he likes how Mickey smells which is very adorable but he also definitely loved Mickey at this point and he was definitely aware of that. I think he didn’t say it for two reasons: one, he wasn’t ready to admit it out loud and two, he didn’t want Mickey to hear him say it. Before, being over-eager and too obvious about his feelings hadn’t been met with a good response from Mickey, so I think he was trying to avoid scaring him off, while also doing some pretty serious compartmentalization himself. This especially makes sense considering that they weren’t technically a couple here, and that Mickey had only just started admitting (through actions, not words) that what he and Ian had was about more than sex.

3. “You love him?” -Svetlana, 4x12

The dynamic between Mickey and Svet is a very interesting one, and I don’t know if anybody could ever fully pick it apart. But in this scene, you see an odd mutual understanding between them (which extends in season 5a). And what’s truly shocking is that Mickey says “maybe”, which is such a big step for him. Before, if somebody asked him that he would have completely avoided the question while probably blowing up at the person. But he says “maybe”, showing that, even if he doesn’t fully understand his feelings, he had definitely thought about it, and it doesn’t scare him like it used to. This is definitely because he came out and finally felt like he could really be with Ian without this sword hanging over his head (even though the circumstances of that weren’t great).

4. “I love you.” -Mickey, 5x06

God this one... breaks my heart. First of all, the fact that Mickey was the first one to say it would have been shocking in seasons 1-3, but it actually makes so much sense in season 5. Over and over again this season, Mickey’s shown that he loves Ian, but the fact that he can only say it when he thinks he’s losing Ian, and that it’s obvious he didn’t mean to say it, shows that he still hasn’t fully come to terms with his feelings, no matter how strong they are.

5. “You used to love me--now you don’t even know who I am.” Ian, 5x12

This one is almost identical to #1, except with the added piece that Ian no longer thinks he deserves to be loved. This one is so fascinating to me, because it shows, once again, that Ian projects his emotions onto other people instead of dealing with his own feelings. He tells Mickey that he used to love him, even though there’s been no indication from Mickey that he no longer loves him. He says that Mickey doesn’t know who he is when, really, he’s the one that doesn’t know who he is. He put words into Mickey’s mouth, because that’s what he believed to be true, and I really don’t think that at this point anything could have convinced him otherwise. The lack of self-worth that comes with having a mental illness is so debilitating and all-consuming that no amount of reasoning from Mickey would have done much to convince him that he deserved what Mickey was offering to give him.

6. “I love you.” -Mickey, 5x12

So while we have Ian telling Mickey that he used to love him, Mickey counters by just saying how he feels to his face. I think that seeing Ian go though what he went through, and almost losing him like three times made it so that Mickey could no longer deny his feelings. But like I said, Ian had it so cemented in his mind that he was doomed and fucked for life, that I don’t think anything could have gotten through to him at this point. And of course at this point Noel left the show, so we never got to see what could have happened between them if Mickey had stayed. (I 100% think they would have gotten back together sometime in late season 6 after Ian reached a stable place again but whatever).

7. “I love you.” -Ian, 7x11

Fuck. 7x10 and 7x11 are such bittersweet episodes because while it does make it so clear that Ian and Mickey are the loves of each others lives, it’s also when they thought they would never see each other again. What’s extra sad it that this is the first time we’ve ever heard Ian say this. And it’s a goodbye. The only time Ian can really face his emotions head on is when he’s forced to, and he was definitely forced to here. He loves Mickey. He knows Mickey loves him. But that didn’t really matter here, and it’s so tragic, but also really realistic. As for Mickey, he doesn’t even seem surprised--because he wasn’t. He wouldn’t have asked Ian to come if he didn’t know he loved him. This scene is extra heartbreaking because of that. This whole thing just serves as a reminder that sometimes love isn’t enough, and that sometimes there are forces bigger than any two people at play, which I think has always been a central idea to their story.

8. “I love you.” “I know, love you too.” Ian and Mickey, 10x03

Mutual ‘I love you!!!! It took like 10 years but it finally happened. They say it like they’ve said it a thousand time before, which makes me think that it’s definitely not the first time they’ve said it. There’s not really much to talk about here except that finally they’re allowed to love each other. Sure it’s not an ideal situation, but it is one where there are no forces actively working to keep them apart, which is so wonderful. When Ian and Mickey are allowed to just be, they work so well. Even though they’re saying goodbye here, it’s not a real one, not like the break up or the border. It’s temporary and they both know that so for once, them saying ‘i love you’ is a happy (or at least bittersweet) thing instead of the tragedy it was all of the other times.

9. “I love you…and I trust you.” -Ian, 10x08

Remember that quote where Fiona tells Jimmysteve that to her (and all the Gallaghers) trust is bigger than love? Yeah. Anyways his scene is tough because while I don’t think Ian was necessarily lying about genuinely wanting to marry Mickey and the legal stuff just being bonus, I do think he was downplaying the importance, both to himself and Mickey. And at the courthouse, once the bonus of spousal privilege wasn’t needed, he definitely started to realize the magnitude of the situation and what connotations marriage held for him. I mean marriage isn’t something you should just decide on a whim, no matter how much you love somebody and I think he realized that the second the impending threat was gone.

10. “Mickey, I love you!” -Ian 10x08

This is him making it as clear as possible to Mickey that it’s marriage that’s the problem, not him. He saw how heartbroken Mickey was when he didn’t sign the papers, and was basically doing damage control at this point. The problem was, Mickey couldn’t see through his initial heartbreak to really listen to what Ian was saying, or try to understand where he was coming from. I think that Mickey is an incredibly understanding person, but this was just one time too many for him.

11. “You’re just saying you don’t love me enough now.” -Mickey, 10x09

This is probably the first time we’ve ever seen Mickey question Ian’s feelings for him. I think that at the courthouse, he was just so blatantly reminded of the break up and the border that he wasn’t thinking rationally. He was so terrified at the prospect of Ian not choosing him, that he couldn’t listen to Ian’s (pretty reasonable) explanation for why he didn’t get married. However, I don’t think he really believed what he was saying, especially because of how petty he was being with Byron, and how obvious he made it that he would instantly go back to Ian if he proposed. But it still is really sad that he was reminded of that all over again after believing that he and Ian were gonna get married and that he was never going to have to worry about that again.

12. “How do you know you love me?” -Ian, 10x09

I’ve written a meta on this before but here I go again. He’s once again assuming that Mickey couldn’t possibly love him--that he couldn’t possibly want to be with him forever. Not because Mickey’s done anything to indicate that, but because that’s what he thinks Mickey should feel. He genuinely can’t believe that Mickey would want to be with somebody like him, especially because of what he saw with Monica and the way she destroyed relationship after relationship (both romantic and familial). I don’t think he sees himself as being all that different from Monica, so even though that’s definitely not something Mickey would ever care about, it weighs on him heavily (and probably always will). This whole thing just so directly parallels the break up, and it’s so sad to think that, after everything, Ian still doesn’t think he’s worthy of the kind of love Mickey has for him.

13. “I love you Mickey Milkovich. More than anything.” -Ian, 10x10

More than anything!! God, the proposal was a little underwhelming but this line!! It’s Ian choosing to get past all of his doubts because his love for Mickey is bigger to him than they could ever be. Like I said, I don’t think he’ll ever fully be over his insecurities, but he can definitely choose to let Mickey in and have hope that they can work through it together. And even though Mickey knew that Ian loved him and was basically just biding his time, it must have felt amazing for him to hear it put so clearly like this.

14. “Look I love you. I love you.” -Mickey, 10x12

First of all, the way he says it is so amazing. Second of all, there isn’t much to say about this except that it’s so indicative of his growth. Like he went from being closeted and terrified, to blurting out how he feels in a room full of people. That is such a beautiful thing and I get really emo whenever I think about it.

15. “To love and to cherish you ‘til death do us part.” -Ian and Mickey, 10x12

I actually really love that they used traditional vows for their wedding. So much of their relationship was complicated and hard, so to have something very simplistic but meaningful as their vows was so perfect. And the way they say them... they’re being so sincere and so honest. They really mean what they’re saying. They love each other!! And they’re married!! Wow!! That’s all I have to say about this.

#edit: check the notes for 2.5! (the one that i missed)#nvm i just added it in skfjklds #alright here yall go!! enjoy the roller coaster #holy shit this is long #if you actually took the time to read this please know that I love you and would die for you #also i still feel like i missed some?????#i sure hope not #i really hope s11 just focuses on them working through all the insecurities and stuff that they both definitely still have #shameless #gallavich #shameless meta #gallavich meta #ian x mickey

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neeterloveschenford · 3 years ago

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THOUGHTS ON RNM 3x08

Wow! What an amazing episode!!! I think I have watched it 5 times now.ed And watched all the Malex scenes on youtube repeatedly. Stopped and stared at every gifset I’ve run across. It’s just been an amazing feeling knowing that we won people!!! Malex is back and I honestly don’t think they will be going back. It’s really, finally their time. But I’m going to save them til last because there will be so much flailing! So I’m going to start with the only thing that I had a real problem with in this episode. Why does no one care about Kyle? I’m positive that they know about him. Alex wouldn’t drop everything he dropped in this episode without letting them know where Kyle is. And there is a very bad habit with this show of telling instead of showing. And I totally get why Maria is the priority at the moment. Kyle is presumably stable and being taken care of by Eduardo, while Maria was deteriorating while she was “possessed” by Jones. But still, a little “Hey Alex, how’s my brother?” from Rosa would not have been remiss. But, I guess I just have to take a step back and remember that this is RNM and old habits are hard to break with them apparently.

Now. Let’s move on to the things I loved. I know there was so much hate and salt thrown Maria’s way because she’s rarely written the way she should be. And of course there was all of last season that made a lot of people loathe and despise her. I’ve had my moments where I never wanted to see her on my screen again, but then I took a step back and realized I was putting all of my hatred and upset onto a fictional character. Maria is not the person who wrote such a crappy story for her last season. I think we can all agree that Maria was Carina’s self-insert character. But I decided that I was going to move past my anger and try and embrace her this season. Admittedly, it’s been up and down. I think there have been times when she has definitely been used too much, and times when she was never fleshed out. But this episode her story revolved around what I have always thought was the most interesting part about her. Her heritage. I’ve always been interested in Patricia and what happened to her at Caulfield. To see how she worked with Nora to build the Lockhart machine was great! And then to find out how she was injected with the alien chemicals after Lockhart figured out she was actually helping the people she was supposed to be injecting, that was awesome. I’m glad Maria got to find out more about her family’s past. Now I’m left wondering if Arturo has a past interaction with aliens or a connection to Caulfield. So far we’ve learned about the Valentis, the DeLuca’s and the Manes families. Now we need to find out about the Ortecho’s.

Next I would like to talk about all of the wonderful interactions between the women. I was feeling so much girl power emanating from my tv screen! I don’t care what anyone says, I love the friendships between Liz and Isobel, Isobel and Rosa, Rosa and Maria, Isobel and Maria, and Liz and Maria. They were amazing. I can’t wait to see more of their interactions. I think all of the women (frankly, all of the characters) have grown so much this season. I love the bonds of sisterhood that have formed between our ladies! They were all so supportive and caring with each other. It’s like Maria said, she wasn’t alone, she had her sisters with her! And when Liz said the three women I love, I wanted to cry. They have all come so far this season. Is everything perfect? No. But it’s so much better than it has been. I just want more, more, more.

Liz got to be her badass science self again. I loved the fact that she talked to the horse the entire episode. Sometimes we just have to bounce ideas off of somebody. Why not a horse? And the way she figured out how to disconnect Jones from Maria using Rosa’s new powers was perfection. She really got to see a new side to Rosa this time. I’m so glad that we are getting these wonderful Ortecho sister moments!

Isobel is a bamf! She took on Jones without a moments hesitation and totally kicked his ass! I love her so much! She has grown so confident in her abilities. And the fact that the one moment of doubt she had was when Rosa swooped in with pod Yoda wisdom was exactly what she needed. They are one of my favorite friendships on the show.

And my last thing before I fall down the Malex rabbit hole. My dudes. Get over the hug already! It has been canon the entire time that Alex still thinks of Maria as one of his best friends. As much as y’all want her to have her reckoning for 2x06, it’s not going to happen. If it bothers you so much that all you can do after so much wonderfulness, is complain about Maria, then you need to really think about whether or not this is the show for you. She is not going anywhere anytime soon. Yes, she still annoys me sometimes, but I can put that aside and love the show despite her. I don’t mean to be harsh, but there is just too much negativity out there.

So now for the good stuff. (Rubs hands together.) OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG!!!!!!!

I cannot believe that we won! We’ve lost so many times. But now WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS MY FRIENDS! We were given a feast with this episode. I mean in the first five minutes we have Alex coming clean to Michael about joining Deep Sky. And instead of blowing up and walking away, Michael actually listened. And what Alex said about making a world where Michael didn’t have to live in fear for the both of them? I nearly died then and there. I seriously could have just had that moment and been happy. The eyebrow flirting was so cute. Then we get it again when they are trying to figure out where Jones was. The heart eyes coming from Michael was glorious. He was so proud of his man and his hacking skills. And we got dorky eyebrow flirting again! Then we have that scene where we learn why Alex is the way he is. I know there has been a lot said about him having a white saviour complex with the story of Omar, but I’ve heard similar stories from actual vets. We tend to let our own feelings about the military cloud our feelings for the men and women who serve. I’m glad that they finally showed Alex’s PTSD. He holds himself away from people because he knows what it’s like to lose people. And Michael rubbing his cheek like that. I almost died again. I just love them so much. And then we get the scene where Alex stops Michael from trying to take the sword from Jones. Him grabbing Michael’s hand like that was downright sexual. I need to fan myself. That’s chemistry folks! And then we get Alex hitting Jones with the truck! What a great parallel with Michael hitting Jesse with his cane. Those boys will do anything to protect each other.

And then we have that scene. SO MUCH GOODNESS! Alex telling Michael about the Lockhart machine. Michael admitting that he knows that he probably won’t get clearance to work on the project. Alex saying he will tell him everything anyway. Our boys have grown so much this season! And the way Michael took off his hat to kiss Alex. I just felt so much in that moment. That kiss was so soft and sweet. When they pulled away, the way Alex looked up at Michael with so much longing was just uh! And Michael’s little exhale and smile. He knows exactly how to put Alex at ease. And then the hug. I am ready to cry right now just thinking about it. I know many people think it was too much too soon, but I beg to differ. This is how I’ve always seen things happening. Once they were both on the same page, it was bound to go down exactly like this. They have so much history and passion between them. And now they can finally admit to each other and themselves that there is no one else in the universe for each other. Their love is so strong. Why shouldn’t they acknowledge their feelings while growing closer. In the end I think it will only make them stronger.

So that’s my story and I’m sticking to it. I can’t wait til we get worried boyfriend Michael in the next episode. It’s going to be awesome! Till next time my friends!

#roswell new mexico #roswell new mexico s3 #s3ep8 #it's only my opinion

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ad1thi · 4 years ago

Note

henlo adi tis i with a request for some stevetony fics,,, angsty if you have 'em 💓

okay so this rec list is mainly classic stevetony fics, but i assure you - there’s angsty ones in there (ive marked the angsty ones with a 😞 so you can identify them quicker) just a general note that a lot of authors are going to repeat, because there are some authors that (imo) are stevetony staples (so if you see an author more than once - thats a sign that ALL of their stevetony is good and ive cherry picked the ones i love the most) (ive also marked those authors with a 🌟)

in the light of limerence: @shell-heads

It's the final game of the season, their biggest one yet, and there's only one question on everybody's mind: who the hell is Captain Steve Rogers' boyfriend, and why does Cap keep dodging questions about him?

"You gotta admit it's suspicious that only Bucky and Sam have met your boyfriend, dude," Clint points out as he shoves Pietro away with a smirk, pulling the uniform over his head and tugging it down. "We've known you, what-two years? We've never seen the guy even once."

"And your phone mysteriously only has pictures of Tony Stark," Johnny Storm adds as he joins the conversation, knocking knees with Thor when he sits down on one of the benches. "Tony Stark, who has at least ten fansites and personally assured me he's had a boyfriend for the past five years."

"I can't believe Cap is actually out here acting like Tony Stark's boyfriend," Luke says with a smirk, resting against a wall without a care.

"I can't believe you guys still think this is a joke," Sam throws back while tossing his other dirty sock at Luke, who dodges it smoothly.

In little more than ten minutes, the biggest question of Shield University is answered with much aplomb by none other than Tony Stark himself.

almeno tu nell'universo: @silkspectred �� 🌟 (funfact: this is the fic that got me into stevetony)

Tony drives off.

Well, he wants to.

But he can’t.

Because.

Steve Rogers is in front of his car.

Steve fucking Rogers. Is in front of Tony’s fucking car.

Rookie and Jailbait Take On The World: @theapplepielifestyle 🌟

“You really should be in school, you know.”

“Why would I be there when I could be here, solving crimes with my favourite rookie?” Tony flashes a grin, and Steve’s stomach twists like it did on the first day.

Teenager, Steve’s mind supplies. Definitely not legal, stop doing fluttery things, stomach.

Thumb, Index and Pinky Extended: @/Eudoxia 😞

Tony Stark is twenty-one when he loses his voice. It shouldn't matter, but in a world where the first words your Soulmate says to you are marked on your skin, it can be pretty damn annoying.

I (created from fantasies) exist solely for you: @mizzy2k

Six years ago, without the Avengers Initiative there to save the day, scientist Dr. Eric Selvig sacrificed himself to save the world, the almighty demi-god Thor was lost to a terrible storm, and vigilante Iron Man – spotted with a nuclear weapon trying to take advantage of the situation – was forever labelled an enemy of SHIELD.

This is a comic book office AU, where Steve is defrosted a year too late, Thor has forgotten who he is, and no one knows Tony is Iron Man.

Also includes: office pranks, inappropriate post-it notes, and superheroes who like pina coladas and getting caught in the rain.

Celestial Navigation: @sabrecmc

Celestial Navigation: 18 year old Omega!Tony finds himself Bonded to Captain Steve Rogers. He isn't happy about it until he is.

By request, here is CN in one place without other stories and artwork.

Ironsides: @copperbadge 🌟

Antonia Carter Stark takes no shit and no prisoners.

Paved With Good Intentions (I’m On The Road To Hell): @itsallavengers 😞 🌟

When the mysterious group of vigilante assassins known only as 'The Avengers' are tipped off about the dirty secrets that lie within Stark Industries, Steve Rogers has his heart set on taking out Tony Stark for good in order to protect the rest of the world from his evil. He's seen the footage, after all- Stark is a man who fights only for himself. And of course, when a job arises as chief bodyguard for Stark, to protect him from the growing threat of an ominously infatuated stalker, the opportunity is way too good for him to miss out on. It's the perfect placement, and the perfect way to find out whether or not their tipoff is genuine.

But as Steve falls into rank as the new bodyguard for Mr. Stark and he spends time getting to know and protect him, his initial hatred begins to falter and merge into something different, something far more terrifying than the prospect of killing the face of Stark Industries.

Steve Rogers may just be falling in love with him instead.

The Problem With Communication: @itsallavengers

Steve is terrible at flirting, but when he finally picks up the courage to talk to the adorable barista who makes his drinks, he finds himself hitting a small snag:

That being, Tony is deaf. He doesn't know what Steve is saying.

But never say Steve Rogers does not rise to a challenge.

Killing Me Softly (With His Song): @itsallavengers

Steve is Tony's whole world. Tony couldn't imagine life without him. They've grown up together, after all.

Steve gets cancer.

Open Field In Front of Him: orphan account

Steve Rogers's football season is functionally over after a loss to Rutgers, but he finds a distraction in Tony Stark (yes, THAT Tony Stark). A college AU Stony fic.

Good For You: @orbingarrow 😞

Steve doesn't understand why Tony dates people who abuse him. Tony doesn't understand why Steve cares.

The rest is bad choices, good choices, rehab, milkshakes, paintball, YouTube videos, couples therapy and learning to put the past in the past. Or: How Tony finds his happy ending.

COMPLETE 5/27/16 Edited to add art as last chapter on 6/23/16

Wrapped Up In Clover: @festiveferret

It's been seven years since Steve and Tony split up, and Steve's sure he'll never see Tony again. He's finally managed to put their failed relationship behind him and move on, focusing on his friends and building his business. But then his best friends, Bucky and Clint, decide to get married, and their wedding week at a cabin resort in Vermont turns into a minefield of heartbreak for Steve.

little green soldiers: @/nasa 🌟

“Rhodey,” Tony says. “I’m not stupid. He’s shipping out in three months. I’m not going to fall in love with him.”

Tony is a student at MIT; Steve is a soldier. They meet at a house party six months before Steve is set to deploy. This is their story.

flesh and bone: @/nasa 😞

“You or Rogers?” they ask, brandishing a knife or a gun or a flame.

“Me,” Tony says, over and over again. “Me, me, me,” always me.

Buried: @not-close-to-straight

When Howard Stark demands Tony work at a dig site in S.America one summer to "build character" and "learn about life", Tony is furious. But then he meets soldier/archeologist Steve and falls in love with blue eyes and a perfect smile.

Just as they are ready to move forward together, Steve leaves abruptly with no explanation and breaks Tonys heart. Ten years later, Tony stumbles across the file for the old dig site. He's determined to visit and shut it down, but discovers that instead of a village, the dig has uncovered a temple and actually needs MORE money to stay open. A security team is hired to protect the staff and the artefacts they find, and Tony comes face to face with Steve Rogers all over again– except Steve is bearded and BIGGER and way more dangerous than he used to be...And Tony likes it.

When the camp is attacked, Steve jumps into action, snatching Tony and running into the jungle to escape and work their way towards safety. But long days and nights together bring back old feelings, and one day Steve takes a risk and asks Tony to give them another chance. Will Tony say yes? Or is his heart buried too far for the soldier-turned- archaeologist-turned-mercenary to find it?

don’t know why it took me so long to see: @3799steps

“Oh, watch this,” Natasha says, propping her chin against her knuckles and turning a sweet gaze on him. “Tony, what’s it like dating a superhero?”

Tony bristles in irritation. “We’re not dating,” he snaps. “Captain America probably thinks he can get into anyone’s pants just ‘cause he’s got a mask, costume, and reputation, but not me, buddy. That shield? Gotta be overcompensating for something.” He adds, a bit petulantly, “Oh, and all that blue? Definitely more Steve’s color than his.”

- In which Tony is a genius in all matters except recognising his boyfriend past a mask

Heartlines: @nanasekei 🌟

“Let me,” Tony repeats. He regrets it deeply, so much, he wants to stick the words back into his mouth again, and it must show, in the way his voice wavers. He feels exposed, all of a sudden, as if he’s asking something bigger than what he can actually say. Let me touch you, let me take care of you. “Just… Let me do it.“

Feel Whole Again: @thepartyresponsible

Steve turns to leave. It’s easier to talk, somehow, when he’s not looking at him. “If you need anything,” he says, “I’m just a few floors down.”

“Might regret that, Cap,” Tony says to his retreating back. “I’ve been told I’m needy.”

Steve doesn’t know who the hell said that to Tony. It’s probably for the best that he doesn’t.

“It’s an honor,” he says, a little helpless, out of his depth and out of his time. “It’s an honor to be trusted with something like that, Tony.”

Attack Dog: @/salytierra

Steve doesn't swim in self-delusion. He knows that he is sick and that his owner is even worse. He is aware of it every time he rips some nameless guy’s throat out and feels the crunch of bones under his fingers. He is aware of it every time the rush of adrenaline at seeing life slip away from a stranger’s eyes hits him and gets him bothered and panting in ways that have nothing to do with physical exhaustion.

But it feels so good…

His owner’s approach is less personal. His shots fall clean and take out several foes at a time, his figure elegant and so graceful he looks like a god among savages. He is power incarnated, cold and burning like a sun at the same time… and Steve tries not to focus on him when they are fighting together, least his knees go weak and his technique falters. It’s fine though. They will go home afterwards and his owner will fuck him on the hard floor, with most of their gear still on and a vicious grip in his hair.

#adi's rec list #stevetony #superhusbands #steve rogers/tony stark #stevetony staples #OKAY this is like 20 fics long #so im going to make a second post #and the second post will have more #but have these for now :)))#adi answers asks #rhodee

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ethereal-bang · 4 years ago

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Best Friend’s Brother’s Best Friend

Characters: Felix x female reader, Bang Chan, an OC

Words: 4.4k

Type: strangers to lovers, smut (kinda? suggestive), some major fluff cause I’m a softie for Lix

Request : Hey! I would like to request smth but the fluff/smut scenario is complex (u can just ignore it if its too much for u😊) U are Bang chan's little sister's bestfriend n one time he comes back for vacation from korea w Felix n he proposes him to come sleep over, this day u r also supposed to sleep over at Chris' sister's, so u meet him n Felix for the first time. There's smth obvious between u n Felix, things go on n turns out also heated (sry i didn't know how to explain all of this🥺) Thank U☺️

Requests Are Open!

Warnings: mature content, not explicitly smut but things get pretty heated (will be pretty vanilla. dry humping, heavy kissing etc) Do Not Read if you are under the age of 18. This piece of work is intended for mature audiences only

You’ve always loved the summer. The feeling of freedom, no responsibilities and the exciting prospect of unknown adventures always brings a smile to your face.

Today is the same way. You take in the feeling of the sun warm on your back, the breeze through your hair as you ride your bike across town. The first day of summer has come, and you can’t wait to spend your days with those you hold dearest to you, like your best friend Mia.

Mia has been your friend since you were three years old. It started as two toddlers running around the playground together, your mothers keeping a watchful eye as you run through the grass and chase butterflies until your little legs give out. Many playdates were spent that way, slowly forming a bond that you knew would continue on through time and fallen leaves with the changing of each season.

Each year that past brought you new experiences. New classes, birthdays, crushes, heartbreak-- everything the two of you could've gone through together, you have. Your families even, are attached at the hip this point.

Take her older brother, Chan for instance. Only three years older than his sister, he took on the protective older brother role for you as well. Driving you to practice, helping you with homework, you name it. Although he can be a little annoying sometimes, as “big brothers” can be, you wouldn’t trade your friendship with him for the world. Which was why you were heartbroken when he was signed to JYP and off to South Korea, to pursue his dreams of making music.

You were proud of him, absolutely. He had worked so hard his entire life and you knew he was destined to do great things. The airport send off was sad, but promises of facetime calls and letters sent brought you slight comfort.

Years went on, and your friendship with Mia, as well as Chan, never changed. Now graduated from high school, this summer was the most exciting one yet. Going off to college in the fall was daunting, but knowing that you wouldn’t have to worry about it for at least another three months meant that you could truly relax, and take in the newfound freedom that comes with being an adult.

Well, kinda.

You pulled up on your bike in front of Mia’s house; the large front porch with the cutest little swing out front reminding you of all the times you spent with her there after school. Images of hours spent running around the front yard and 25 cent lemonade stands fill your head as you make your way to the front door, not even bothering to knock because you knew Mia was home.

Setting your shoes at the door, you call out for your best friend. “Mia? It’s me, Y/N!” you say as you peak your head into the living room, finding no signs of life. “In the kitchen!” you hear her say and you immediately turn around to walk through the doors.

When you walk in, your heart soars as you spot a certain curly haired boy standing with her at the counter. “Chan!” you scream and basically knock him over. It’s been at least 4 years since you’ve last seen him, and the surprise makes your day better already. He gives you a hug and laughs his signature laugh, and you can't believe he’s actually here. “WHY didn’t you tell me you were coming home?!’ you say as you smack him on the shoulder. He pretends to be hurt and rolls his eyes. “Then it wouldn’t be a surprise, dummy” he says. It’s only then that you realize there’s someone else in the room.

You look over and immediately recognize Felix. You were obviously a fan of Stray Kids, how could you not be? This was the first time you’d met any of the other boys in person, though, and you blushed when you realized he was even more handsome than the videos made him out to be.

His blonde hair frames his face perfectly as he looks up at you, and you take in the way his freckles paint his face like the most beautiful constellation in the sky. You take in the shape of his nose, and his lips, the cupid’s bow prominent and his lips turned upwards into a shy smile. You realize that you’re staring, and the blush on your cheeks darken.

Chan clears his throat, aware of the awkward atmosphere as he laughs quietly. “Right, right. I forgot you two have never met. Y/N, this is Felix. Felix, this is Y/N, Mia’s best friend.” He says, gesturing between the two of you. Mia makes eye contact with Chan as the two of you awkwardly say your hellos, wiggling her eyebrows, and he waves her off. “It’s nice to finally meet you.” you say and stick your hand out. He stands up and does the same, shaking your hand softly. “It’s nice to meet you too! I hope we can get to know each other,” he says. You were no strange to how deep his voice is, but hearing it in person is completely different. The timbre of his voice sends a feeling up your spine that you haven’t felt in a long time. And then it strikes you. They’re here, not in Korea.

“Wait, why are the two of you here? N-not that I don't WANT you here or anything I just- you’re normally an ocean away an-” “Relax, Y/N,” Mia says, cutting off your confused rambling before you can dig yourself into a deeper hole. “Chan is home for a vacation and decided to bring ‘Lix along! Isn’t that exciting?” She says, glad to have her brother back home.

“Yep! The company decided we all needed a long break since we’ve been working so much this year, so we’ll be here for the next two months!” Chan says, and you beam. The whole summer! This opens up a brand new world of possibilities. “So,” you begin, all three of them looking at your expectantly.

“What do we do first?”

____________________________________

The first few weeks of summer are always the most exciting. Everything is a first. Movie nights, late night trips to the local diner, and catching fireflies in the backyard seem just that much more fun. You also got the chance to reconnect with Chan, and build a new friendship with Felix.

Felix is an excitable soul. Always one for random adventures, the anticipation of the day’s activities always evident in his eyes that seem to sparkle at every moment. When it came to sleepovers, the two of you always seemed to be the first ones awake. This led to many early morning (if you call 8 am early) impromptu breakfasts together, sitting the Bang family kitchen and talking about anything and everything. Felix is incredibly funny, always having a reference or a joke up his sleeve no matter the conversation.

Take yesterday, for example. The summer carnival in town is in full swing, and Mia thought it would be a great idea for the four of you to go. You get up bright and early and head over to their house, knocking on the door excitedly. Your breath catches in your throat when Felix opens the door. He had clearly woken up not too long before; His hair still a little messy, and a sleepy smile adorns his face when he realizes it’s you. You can’t help but giggle, he looks so cute in the early hours of the morning and it makes you want to reach up and push his puffy cheeks together. “Oh, h-hey y/n I didn’t know you’d be here so soon...I-I’m gonna go get dressed,” he stutters, letting you into the house and then rushing upstairs.

____________

Once everyone is ready to go, you all pile into Mia’s car and head over to the carnival. The car ride is filled with singing along to the radio, windows down and taking in the sights of the city as it slowly wakes up. Something about the summer brings everyone outside, you think to yourself as you pass families sitting in patio areas for a nice breakfast and people out walking their dogs through the city streets.

Pulling into the parking lot, you bounce in your seat with excitement. It’s just opened for the day, and you can see the rides begin to move and lights turning on, adding to the atmosphere. You’re sat next to Mia in the front seat, but you can see Felix through the rearview mirror. Your eyes meet for a split second and you turn away, noticing the way his eyes sparkled when they met yours. “He’s probably just excited about the fair,” you think to yourself, shrugging it off.

Chan and Felix are the first two out of the car, followed by Mia and then yourself. The walk to the ticket booth was short, but was filled with Chan’s excited noises as he talked about everything he wanted to do while at the carnival. It was the first time he’d been in almost 5 years, and he said it was something he had missed while overseas.

Waiting in line at the ticket booth, you take in your surroundings as you wait for the others to buy their tickets. People have now actually made their way inside, and you can hear the music coming from the various games and rides all around you, along with the screams of the people already on some of the rollercoasters.

You’re broken out of your thoughts by Felix’s deep voice, hearing him say “2 tickets, please” to the lady at the window. Confused, you tug on his sleeve and look at him. “Felix,” you start but he smiles and shakes his head, opting to wrap your hand around his own arm as he says “Don’t worry about it, I got it.”

You feel butterflies in your chest at the action, but try not to let yourself be so easily affected. Instead, he pulls you along with Chan and Mia, and you make your way into the park.

“So...what do we ride first?” Chan asks. He looks over to you and Felix’s intertwined arms and raises his eyebrows, giving Felix a look that luckily you didn’t see because you were too busy trying to decide if you wanted to play a game first or go on one of the rollercoasters instead.

“Let’s go play one of those first!” Mia chimes in, spotting one of those games where you throw a baseball to knock down some bottles. She’s always been the competitive type, so it’s no surprise to you as she walks over to the games, teasing Felix that he doesn’t stand a chance up against her.

This declaration of war seemed to spur something on in Felix, determination in his eyes as he watches Mia knock nearly every bottle down. She looks at him as she’s handed her prize, a little pink stuffed monkey from the middle shelf that she holds dearly to her chest. “Beat that, Felix.” she laughs as he steps up to the game booth.

You stand beside Chris and Mia and watch as Felix begins throwing the baseballs. With ridiculous precision, he knocks down two bottles. Then another three. Then another two more. You’re all watching in surprise as Felix knocks the rest of the bottles down with his final baseball, eyes wide and Mia pouting, realizing she’s been beat.

The bell dings, and the carnival worker cheers as he tells Felix to pick anything from the top shelf. He grabs a plush, cartoon cat toy and immediately turns around and hands it to you. “Here, you can have it,” he says, a blush adorning his cheeks. Your expression mirrors his as you take the toy and hold it close to your chest. Mia and Chan both roll their eyes at the innocent display of affection. Neither of them can believe that the two of you are so absolutely oblivious to each other’s feelings.

_______

Many rollercoaster rides and carnival food later, the sky is beginning to grow dark. The day was spent playing rock paper scissors to decide who rides with who, who pays for food, and who holds the other’s things when the ride won’t allow everyone to ride together. It’s the most fun day you’ve had in a long time, and you’re thankful that you get to spend it with the people you hold dearest to you.

The sun slowly setting is making Felix look absolutely beautiful, and you have to stop yourself from constantly staring at his skin and the way the sunlight makes his freckles stand out even more than normal.

Once you return to the Bang residence, everyone goes off to do their own thing; Mia to take a shower, Chan to play some video games, and you decide to go to the backyard. Opting to sit on the bench off the back porch, you smile as you see fireflies blinking throughout the yard. Moments like these were your favorite, the calm breeze through your hair as the air is still a little sticky; once the sun sets it will cool down, so you put up with it for now.

You’re a little surprised when you see Felix come to join you outside, you thought he had been playing games with Chan upstairs. “Hey,” he says with a smile. You nod your head and he takes a seat next to you. “Penny for your thoughts?” He asks as he notices the far away look in your eyes.

“I’m just thinking about how much fun this summer has been. How much today has been. Thank you for the stuffed animal, by the way.” You say with a blush on your cheeks. He rubs the back of his neck, feeling embarrassed and a little nervous. “Oh, yeah, no problem I mean, I know you like cats so..” “Yeah..” you say, both of you trailing off into a comfortable silence.

“You know,” you start off, “I’m really glad Chan brought you back home with him. It’s nice to finally get to know you,” you say quietly. Felix smiles and moves a little closer to you. “Yeah? I agree. I’m glad I came with him, too.” he says. He’s close enough to you on the bench that your shoulders are touching, and the proximity makes you nervous. You can feel him looking at you as your eyes wander across the back yard, watching a bunny run into the bushes. You turn to look at him, and he’s so close that time feels like it’s stood still.

He’s moving closer towards you, and your breath catches in your throat. Is he about to kiss you? Your mind is going haywire. His lips are less than an inch away from yours, and you close your eyes out of reflex. One slight move and he could jus-

“Hey guys! Let’s go get dinner, Chan says he’s paying.” You and Felix jump apart as Mia is suddenly at the back door. Scrambling to your feet, you can’t look Felix in the eye, embarrassed by almost getting caught with what was about to happen. “O-oh yeah, sure!” Felix says, just as startled as you are. He lets you head in the door before him, and you try to shake the butterflies when you remember the feeling of him so close.

____________

Today, it’s Mia who wakes up before the boys do, so the two of you wander into the kitchen, making breakfast for everyone before Felix and Chan wake up. Mia passes you the pancake mix that she’s just finished making, and you sprinkle some blueberries into the batter that you’ve put on the griddle. “Who’re the blueberries for?” Your best friend asks as she cuts some more fruit to put out for everyone. “Oh they’re for Felix, he likes blueberries,” you say as you absentmindedly wait for the pancake to cook enough to flip over.

“You know, Felix seems to have taken a liking to you,” she teases, popping a piece of watermelon into her mouth. You roll your eyes at her, a sense of false hope spreading in your chest. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you say, hoping that you can convince her and possibly yourself, that there’s nothing there.

“Come on y/n,” she starts, “the two of you literally ditched me and Chan the other night to sit outside and stare at fireflies before dinner. And don't think I didn’t see how close he was to you when I came outside! You just need to say something to him already. I’m begging you.” She watches you take the pancake off the griddle and place it on a plate, grabbing the bowl of pancake batter and starting on another one.

“I don’t know Mia, maybe he wasn’t trying to kiss me! Maybe I just had something on my face! Felix is a nice guy he’d do that kind of thing for me,” you reason. In your mind, it was so far from believable that Felix could have any type of feelings for you. He’s and idol, surrounded by some of the prettiest and most talented girls around, there’s no way he’d settle for someone as normal as you.

“I see those gears turning in your head, y/n, don’t think too much of it otherwise you’re just gonna make yourself sad. He IS a nice guy, but I also can’t lie to you and tell you he doesn’t look at you the way Chan looks at every dog he’s ever seen,” she laughs.

You were about to open your mouth to argue, but you’re saved by the sound of footsteps coming down the stairs. Chan comes first, Felix following close behind. Both of them have clearly just woken up, probably from the smell of the pancakes that you just remembered you were making. Luckily, you noticed just in time to take them off the stove and put the remaining pancakes on everyone’s plates.

“Good morning sleepyheads. Glad you could finally join us,” Mia jokes as she places the boys’ plates in front of them “Ooooo blueberries!” Felix says as he takes a look at the pancakes on his plate, and Mia shoots you a knowing look. You kick her under the table, and remain quiet as breakfast begins.

_________

The four of you decided that staying inside was the best course of action, the summer weather was in full effect today, and none of you wanted to face the July heat. The day was spent making lemonade, sharing youtube videos and playing multiple rounds of uno, laughter filling the house because Chan and Felix were hellbent on making each other lose (which Felix did. A lot.) It was so normal, you had almost forgotten about the little moment you had with Felix last night. Almost.

Later in the afternoon, Chan speaks up all of a sudden. “Hey, Mia, remember we need to head over to Auntie’s house really quick, like Mom asked us to this morning.” He said. Looking confused, Mia walks into the living room to look at him. “What are you talking about? Mom didn’-” she stops her sentence when she sees that Chan is looking at her urgently, eyes flitting between you and Felix, who are currently engrossed in a movie on TV.

Catching on quick, Mia nods her head. “Oh, yeah, that’s right. Auntie’s house.” You look up when you hear her voice. “Auntie’s house? That sounds fun, let’s go!”

“No!” Chan says quickly, and now he has Felix’s attention as well. “It’s a...family thing,” Mia says, trying to save her brother’s ass so they don’t get caught. “Right, right. It’s a family thing so you can’t come we’ll be back see you later!!” Chan say as he pulls Mia out the front door. Raising your eyebrows, you question your best friend’s weird antics as they shut the door. “Ooookay,” Felix laughs once the front door closes. “What do you think they’re problem is?” You question and turn back to Felix. He looks a little nervous, and you’re unsure why. “No idea,” he says quietly and turns back to the tv.

He’s sitting far away from you on the couch, and the urge to move closer to him is growing stronger by the minute. You try to control yourself and focus on the movie, but it’s getting harder as you replay the moments from yesterday in your mind. You try to get comfortable where you’re seated, but for some reason no matter how you sit, you can't manage to stay still for more than 10 seconds.

Felix looks over at you occasionally, wondering if you’re uncomfortable being alone with him. There’s no way, right? You’ve spent plenty of time alone with him in the past month and a half, if he had made you uncomfortable, you would’ve said something, right? And why did Chan and Mina just run out like that? He doesn’t remember ever hearing their mom mention anything about going to their aunt’s house this morning. Was he just not paying attention?

You’re still moving about on the couch, and curiosity peaks in Felix.

“Are you okay?” Felix asks, looking over when you move for the fifth time in half a minute. “Y-yeah! Yeah I’m ok. Just a little cold,” you say, trying to play off the situation. He shifts a little in his seat, wondering if he’s really about to do what he’s thinking about doing. And before he knows it, he opens his mouth and is doing exactly what he was afraid to.

“I mean,” he begins hesitantly, “you can always..come sit over here with me, if you want. No pressure! But you know..if you want to,” He blushes, but extends his arm against the back of the couch, an open invitation for you to cuddle into his side. Thinking about it for a moment, you figure there’s no real harm in doing so, wanting to satisfy your need to be close to him in hopes that it'll stop the feeling in your chest.

You were wrong, it doesn’t help the feeling in your chest at all. If anything, it magnifies it ten fold. You scoot over to Felix’s side of the couch, tucking yourself into his side and getting comfortable. You relax in his hold, and Felix feels a sense of relief wash over him.

You try to get back into the movie, but just as you get comfortable again, a very intense romantic scene begins in the movie. The two characters are about to meet their inevitable downfall, sharing a dramatic declaration of their love. The desperation in their voices are evident, knowing that if this so happens to be the last moment they ever have on earth, then they’ll be okay with it knowing that neither of their feelings were unrequited. .It doesn’t help that Felix keeps looking over at you every thirty seconds.

You feel Felix tense, and he turns to look down at you, your head now rested on his shoulder as you got comfy in his embrace. He wants to hold you like this forever. He panics a little, realizing how close your faces where when you turned to look up at him. He looks into your eyes and immediately melts, it reminds him of the other night, when he was just so close to finally kissing you. All he would have to do now, in this moment, is grab your jaw and pull you forward and then he’d be kissing you.

So that’s what he did.

It was a quick kiss, and Felix pulls away just as quickly as he pulls you in. “I uh..I am so sorry. I don't know what came over me if you never want me to do that again I won’t and we can forget that it ever happened I am so sorry,” he rambles, and you laugh at him. “Felix,” you say, turning to face him properly, “You have no idea..how long I have wanted you to do that.” You confess, cheeks turning red. He giggles. Giggles. That’s all the incentive you need to pull him back to you and capture his lips in another kiss.

You move to straddle his lap, your hands tangling in his hair and his immediately landing on your hips. You want to stay with him like this forever, you’ve decided. Running your hands through the soft tresses makes you realize that no one has ever made you feel the way that Felix does. He is home to you, and you know immediately that you don’t want anyone else. He moves to touch the skin that’s exposed right at the bottom of your tshirt, and a content sigh passes your lips. Felix uses the moment to slip his tongue in your mouth and you just let him take over, too lost in the feeling of him to fight for any type of dominance.

You roll your hips against him and a deep groan comes from his chest. You kiss him a little harder, and his labored breathing matches your own. You were now immensely glad that Mia and Chan were nowhere to be found.

His lips move to your neck, and the noise that comes from you does not go unnoticed by him. He’s guiding your hips against his now, bucking up into you and you’re getting lost in the feeling of him. Looking at you, Felix just wants to thank every god that has ever existed for letting him be with you in this way. In this moment, you are the only thing that exists to him. Even if he has to leave in a few weeks to head back to Korea and his idol life, his heart belongs here with you. And you'll wait for him each time, you know you will. This felt like destiny, and you’ll be damned if a body of water comes between you and him ever again.

________

Mia and Chan take their sweet time coming back to the house, deciding to go get dinner and hoping that their idiot lovestruck best friends have finally gotten themselves figured out. They walk through the door and smile as their met with the sweetest scene ever. You and Felix are asleep on the couch, completely wrapped in each other.

Needless to say, the state of Felix’s hair and the dark markings on your neck are enough for the two of them to silently fist bump as they walk to their respective bedrooms.

________________________________________________________________

A/N: Oh my goodness. If you’ve made it to the end of this, thank you for reading! I really hope this lived up to your expectations Anon >.<

Masterlist

#WELP two computer crashes and one loss of my sanity and it's done!#felix #stray kids scenarios #stray kids fluff #stray kids smut #felix scenario #ryn's work: felix #ryn's work: stray kids #stray kids

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luxshine · 4 years ago

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The Great Supernatural Rewatch Project - Salvation

I started writting this in the middle of season 13 but RL and work and some mental health issues made me take a step back from fandom in general and well, I was also fearing this would be an unending job since the series JUST.KEPT. GOING.

However, now that the series is done (And omg, what a clusterfuck that was. My tallies are going to go insane if I get there) and thus there’s an ending in sight, I will do my best to finish season 1, and try and get the rest of the seasons in a more timely manner. Say, before they do the inevitable reunion and ignore the last episode completely.

(I’m going to be honest, part of the problem was that Supernatural used to be SO good back then, and when I see the new episodes I weep a bit inside. I can’t believe they were so much better at creating story arcs when they weren’t TRYING to create story arcs)

Of course, now we all know that Dean’s plots in general will not have a happy ending no matter what, and that makes that particular tally bittersweet. But there are STILL people who claim that nope, Dean was never mistreated by the writers and well, Jack damn it, I am not going to let that claim go without bringing numbers to the table. Hopefully, it won’t take me 15 years to finish (Because by then, I would be the only one caring I guess)

In any case, last lap for Season 1 and we begin with Salvation.

General stuff

A specific reason for me having rage quitted this episode in particular for so long: For some stupid copyright thing with Netflix, they don’t have Carry On My Wayward Son as the song for the final recap –at least in Netflix Latam. And Supernatural without Carry On My Wayward Son is no Supernatural. So I had to hunt my DVDs. Then my computer DVD player died. Then I decided to make 5 webcomics at the same time. THEN I decided to start doing illustration works, and three other projects and let’s just say I am a bit of a workaholic and leave it like that as the rest is not SPN-related.

Ahem.

Funny thing about the Road so Far –you know, besides being a LOT shorter than the ones we’re getting now- is that it focuses a lot more on DEAN at the beginning, while if you watch the show, well, we know most of those Dean scenes come from MoW episodes and not the actual mytharc. Another interesting thing is that if one believes those things to be chronological, it makes it as if the Colt had been with the brothers for a lot longer than half an episode, and that Sam’s issue with the visions is not that recent. Edition Magic everyone! Also, omg, they were babies when the series started, and how WEIRD is to see John looking at them with pride and smiling at Dean at some points.

Anyway, the recap and the epicness that is Carry On my Wayward Son ends and we start the actual plot.

Hello Pastor Jim. Goodbye Pastor Jim. And here Supernatural begins the long, long tradition of killing characters who could’ve been useful later on, and more importantly, that could’ve been the boys’s support system later on. While here it’s understandable since we need to show how dangerous and vicious Meg is –ah, irony that in about 8 seasons people will be rooting for her Redemption- it also makes the Hunters kind of useless. I mean, he has all that weaponry and only uses a knife? Sigh. Really, a waste. Pastor Jim as a concept was really intriguing –and I don’t think we’ve heard of any other hunter who was also a priest. Funny, when we have so many demons free now. There’s also the fact that when Pastor Jim claims that she can’t be in the church because it’s hallowed ground, she replies that “That might work with the minor leagues, but not with her” and I wonder… did we ever got a demon that couldn’t enter a church? Because right now out of the top of my head I can’t remember, and yet Pastor Jim was surprised but later no one seems to think it weird there were signs of demonic activity around his body. Another sign that, as engaging as the series was, once we start digging the world building, things fall apart very quickly.

Actually, if I may digress for a bit, here we have the very first look at Supernatural´s second biggest problem: killing support characters that may have been useful lately. Here it is because Kirkpe had this weird idea that Hunting would never be glamorized by the show/fandom and it would be a completely miserable and lonely existence. He also didn’t think that the series would survive past season 2. So, ok, killing the guy we only knew by throw away lines didn’t seem so bad. By season 13 every single recurring character had died at least once –and there were petitions to bring back I think every one of those who haven’t come back- it’s a big problem.

As I restarted writing, I also realized that the mere existence of Pastor Jim and his room of awesome research and weapons creates a problem in the future about the Men of Letters because… ok, so ONE member of the clerigy knew enough about demons and stuff to be a hunter and have THE Hunter as his main contact (John Winchester was sort of a legend back then. And he had also fell out of contact with many others so the fact that he and Pastor Jim were still friendly? Kind of interesting), but what about the rest? Did the Vatican have any contact with the British men of Letters or the American ones? And if so, what the hell did they think when suddenly ALL the Men of Letters disappeared? Ok, so that’s a lot of stuff that doesn’t matter right now as it won’t actually exist until much, much, MUCH latter, but see what I mean when I say that they didn’t plan anything and the lack of a series bible hurts the show more than it helped it thrive? I am realizing right now I could write a whole treaty on the Men of Letters and their non-relationship with hunters ONLY using this cold beginning and the Henry Winchester episode.

But this is not the time for that, so we get our title card and a very, VERY young Jeffrey Dean Morgan.

We move to John who is explaining off camera everything he knows about Yellow Eye´s plan. We can tell it´s not much as he thinks it came out of hibernation and that the whole attacking families is part of a cycle, but back then it was impressive how much he had managed to find out about this demon. We also know that it attacks exactly when the baby in the house is six months old, which brings us to this little jewel:

JOHN It starts in Arizona, then New Jersey, California. Houses burned down to the ground. It's going after families, just like it went after us.

SAM Families with infants?

JOHN Yeah. The night of the kid's six-month birthday.

SAM I was six months old that night?

JOHN Exactly six months.

SAM So basically, this demon is going after these kids for some reason. The same way it came for me? So Mom's death...Jessica. It's all because of me?

DEAN We don't know that Sam.

SAM Oh really? Cause I'd say we're pretty damn sure Dean.

DEAN For the last time, what happened to them was not your fault.

SAM Right. It's not my fault but it's my problem.

DEAN No it's not your problem it's our problem!

Now, in the following seasons we will know that yes, it was ALL about Sam. But right now, the characters and the viewers don´t know that. We know that a lot of families were killed by the demon (That at this point was still “The demon” and wouldn´t become Azazael until later), and that he doesn´t take the children. So… how did Sam leap from “this demon attacks families with 6 month old children” to “It´s all about ME!”? He even ignores that Dean and John lost Mary for his last line, when he decides it´s his problem and not their problem. Also, and this is important for the “Dean is the most awful person to Sam” crowd… Dean immediately tells Sam that no, it´s not his fault. While he could harbor some ill feelings against Sam –and demon Dean, 8 seasons later, will voice them- at this point he is 100% on Sam´s side. There’s also a sideway glance from John to DEAN when Sam claims that everything is about him, and then I wonder exactly why, if John knew all about the fact that the demon chased six month old children specifically, he never resented Sam over it. One would think that given John’s love for Mary and deep desire to revenge, Sam would really be the outcast and the one only treated like a soldier (as he claims he was, but not really as we’ve seen), instead of Dean who was completely blameless in the whole thing.

(Also, this is the first time we see that Azazael´s plan didn´t make much sense IF we believed that Kirkpe had everything planned. But that´s a discussion for another time)

Anyway, John interrupts the argument to explain that while he has no idea what the demon is after (Another thing that later would be contradicted as he knew Sam had powers), but that he has managed to figure out his pattern of attack to the point that it even repeated it for Jessica’s killing (Even if much, much later, we’ll learn that it wasn’t Azazael the one who killed her, and Demons would completely forego the signs when attacking. Have I mentioned I miss the times when the myths made sense?) and the three of them pack up for their first real hunt together as they decide they will save the next baby on the demon’s list, in a town named Salvation.

Important thing to note: when John recites the demon signs, Dean immediately replies “that happened in Lawerence”. He remembers, quite clearly, what happened a week before his mother died even if logistically, at his age? He wouldn’t care nor notice. Sure, he remembers his mom’s death because that was traumatic. But random cow deaths before that? Weird show.

If Sam noticed or not the signs before Jessica died, we don’t know. John is the one who points out they happened.

After two gorgeous road shots where we see John’s truck being followed by Baby (yet another thing we lost, John’s truck. I know we needed to have the guys together all the time, but man, if Sam had inherited it, they would’ve been able to cover more terrain at times, have double the arsenal and maybe not being identified by everyone and their leviathan in season 7, but I digress), and just entering Salvation John stops, obviously spooked by something. As Dean stops behind him, they find out that Pastor Jim is dead, and John got a call from another hunter named Caleb to tell him. They assume it may be the demon they’re chasing, or maybe another demon that was looking for Pastor Jim specifically but that last theory is not very probable.

Here I have to pause to applaud Jeffrey Dean Morgan’s acting, as you can practically FEEL John’s despair at knowing an old friend of him died, and that HE was probably the cause for that death. A Winchester trait, of course, blaming themselves for everything bad that happens in their world, but unlike Sam’s early outburst, here it seems far more desperate. Of course, JDM had a lot more experience than Jared at that point, but I really wanted to make a note of it because we lost a LOT of that characterization for John, where he actually WORRIED about people and not just the hunt. Even as he decides the plan for finding out what baby the demon will take in a week, we can see him broken and confused. So much that while Sam calls him “sir” when receiving orders, Dean continues the conversation by calling him “Dad”.

John then declares that this ends now, obviously feeling responsible for what happened to his friend. A long shot from the flanderized man we’d hear about in future seasons who was infamous for letting his hunting partners die without so much as a second glance.

Also, and not to be mean to the writers, but in their endless accidentally making Sam unsympathetic, they made him say that there were too many children in the county that could be a victim and that it would take forever to check all of them. While I KNOW the intent was to make clear that they had a deadline of one week, it comes out weirdly as “I don’t want to do the footwork.” Seriously, writers should be careful with that.

Actually, let’s dissect that. Because I just thought of two ways they could’ve fixed it AND give us more info.

JOHN Now we act like every second counts. There's two hospitals and a health centre in this county. We split up, cover more ground. I want records. I want a list of every infant that's going to be six months old in the next week.

SAM Dad that could be dozens of kids. How do we know which one's the right one?

JOHN We check em all that's how. You got any better ideas?

SAM No sir.

So, first way to make Sam not look that bad: Give the line to Dean. I wouldn’t like it specially, but hey, he’s the sidekick, not the hero, and so far he has only wanted to bail on ONE hunt because he wasn’t sure it was a supernatural hunt so he’d be better standing than Sam in that regard.

Second way: Make Sam say that YES, he has a better idea. Because the brothers ALREADY faced Max, so he could say they could look for a baby that was a bit “strange”, like, with poltergeist stuff going around. John could not believe him, but at least Sam would be being proactive.

In any case, they separate as John planned and we see each of them get into the hospital records. We get a glimpse of John’s collection of fake IDs, that include one for a Morgue forensic doctor, then Sam getting a homely nurse giving him files and him taking notes, and Dean… getting flirty with a very hot nurse.

And I make a point of the “Oh, look, Dean is an irresponsible womanizer” trope because once again the writers shoot themselves in the foot by showing the opposite of what they were telling (And no, this time I can’t blame it on Jensen’s acting and refusal to look at his female co-stars without respect).

WOMAN Hi. Is there anything I can do for you?

DEAN (smiling) Oh God yes.

She smiles and looks down.

DEAN (Holding up his ID) Only I'm uh....working right now, so...

The writers here make us remember that a) Dean is AMAZINGLY charismatic, as the woman IS flattered and seems interested, and b) That he will NOT dump his work for a quickie. We don’t even get a “maybe later” that could make him look as if he was really into her. It’s just that he flirts naturally, or at least, this is what we can infer now, as so far he hasn’t had any one night stand fling. The one time we saw him have a sexual encounter in the middle of a hunt was with an ex-girlfriend.

And again I have to wonder what was Sera Gamble’s intention with those scenes as yes, this was written by the same team as Faith, another episode where Sam’s good intentions tend to have a darker side, and gave Dean some amazingly cool scenes.

We don’t know what Dean says to the woman, as we cut back to Sam, coming out of the hospital just in time to have a very convenient vision of a woman, a nursery and a fire. Thankfully, the vision also comes with the useful audio hint of a train passing by, so Sam gets out his map and starts checking where that could be, which leads him to the house in his vision.

And by this point, we know we’re in the right track and this is an important Myth Arc episode, because Sam only has multiple visions in Myth Arc episodes, and he has one the moment he steps in front of the house in said vision. The gods of convenience smile upon him as right then and there a woman pushing a pram comes by, and he manages to talk to her, all friendly like by pretending to having just moved. Then Sam learns the woman’s name is Monica, her baby is Rosie, and Rosie is just six months old, exactly to the day.

Also, that she’s a very quiet baby and that it sometimes seems as if she was reading your mind. Oh, and that Monica really is blind to suspicious men asking her about her family with a face that reads “Oh shit, this is bad”.

Now, HERE is where the whole “five year myth arc” story falls completely. I mean, we already knew it was pretty unlikely it was real, given Kirkpe’s original interviews, but the mere existence of Rosie contradicts every single future story beat. Because if SHE has powers before Azazael goes into her house, then it means that the babies he was hunting didn’t get powers because of him, just that his blood either connected them (hence Sam’s very specific visions), made said powers far more powerful (quite likely), or made them a little bit more prone to violence/prideful behavior. All of those possibilities match with the plan of “raising” a new King or Queen of Hell, that would be faithful to Azazael, but are a bit iffy on the “finding Lucifer’s vessel” thing. Especially since we later learn that the Angels were also helping, and all Hell knew that Lucifer’s vessel HAD to come from the Winchester/Campbell bloodline due to Cain and Abel being the roots of said bloodline, and later pretty much everyone knew Sam was Lucifer’s vessel so the whole targeting a ton of kids, in particular after Mary’s death, is kinda weird.

Oh, Lux, you will say, it is because he wanted to hide his true intentions! No one knew that Sam had been feed demon blood!

Except that the important parties, namely Heaven and Hell, did. Michael had Heaven convinced of his orders, so even if a rogue angel found out that they were speed running the Apocalypse, said angel could be killed. And any demon who was against getting Lucifer back on top would be smart enough to keep quiet so, why the secrecy?

And again, ok, I buy the original demon blood kids being important to “hide” Lucifer’s vessel but… Rosie? What good would it do to Azazael’s plan to have a psychic 4 year old when Lucifer rose? Was “little four year old girl” a good match against a grown up hunter? What was Azazel thinking, if that was the plan all the time?

Now, I want to make clear this doesn’t make THIS episode or the Season-myth arc bad. This original “Boy King of Hell” storyline WAS good. It had a lot of potential, made sense for Sam and since it was before the days of the eternal “What is wrong with Sam?” seasons, there was no boredom of a repeat. It also set a very good question of what made a monster a monster, which would be explored a bit more in Season 2. And it was long before we realized Dean having a myth arc was a pipe dream, so there was no issue there either. It made sense.

But the fact that the writers kind of forgot about everything I just pointed out with Rosie’s scene to try and weld this to the “Heaven vs. Hell” storyline in season 4, and then just promptly forgot because Sam’s powers were then firmly connected to Azazael’s blood so they never came up again and even worse, we never find another psychic kid that could’ve been feed blood by Azazael THIS year that John was chasing him? (Since we know there were no other survivors from Sam’s generation, and later we have a scene that proves that there were no previous generations to Sam’s), it's kind of weird. Personally, I dunno about you, but maybe a return to this storyline in season 6 would’ve been a lot better than we got. Maybe.

By the way, I am not counting the Boy King of Hell story arc as a dropped plot for Sam yet, as we’re going to keep with this at least until season 3. Yes, now we know it didn’t go anywhere, but at the time, and for these episodes in particular, it was THE myth arc of Supernatural. So it can’t be counted as dropped plot yet.

In any case, Sam goes and tells John and Dean about his vision and… oh, boy do we have to move John’s reaction to Emotional Violence.

It’s not good.

But before he can do more damage to Dean’s psyche, Sam gets a call from our favorite demon, Meg. Even if he doesn’t recognize her voice immediately which is weird because a) he did throw her off a window and one would think that makes a girl memorable, and b) it’s not as he knows that many girls who would call him, despite Dean’s best efforts to get him a new girl.

Meg dismisses Sam and asks for John. She makes clear that she is not playing, that she knows he has the Colt and that he will kill every single person who has ever helped John unless he gives it to her that same day at midnight. And to the brothers’ surprise, John accepts those terms (Unfortunately not before we loss Caleb too. I have a lot less interest in Caleb as a character given that he has exactly half a line in the whole show, but it’s still it’s sad to see a guy so defiant even in the face of death go so soon).

Meg also points out that John having the Colt is a “declaration of war” which is interesting as it sort of implies that if he hadn’t gotten it, then the demons would leave him and the brothers alone. And I find that incredibly funny since… no they won’t. And Azazael would’ve been ok if Sam kept the gun anyway, given why they really wanted and once again I am putting holes on the idea that this was planned from the start, aren’t I?

In any case, John declares that Meg is a demon “or is possessed by one” which… ok? First and only time we get the possibility of a demon not using a meat suit. I don’t think this is a mistake, because after all, this is back before the guys faced demons in a normal basis so they could believe that they had their own bodies besides the ones they possessed (And, more importantly, before there was a retcon that made the brothers face and know about demons since pretty much ever). To be completely fair, as much as I love Jimmy and the whole Lucifer arc once it started to make sense… I would’ve been ok if vessels weren’t needed. It added a lot of complications and ended up making the brothers actual serial killers.

Ahem.

After that little gem of wisdom that will be ignored forever, John declares that he will be taking the gun to Meg to avoid more killing and we get another questionable line for Sam. And I am curious as to how to tally it as it’s the opposite of him wanting to leave the hunt, but it’s not that nice either:

DEAN What do we do?

JOHN I'm going to Lincoln. DEAN What? JOHN It doesn't look lilke we have a choice. If I don't go, a lot of people die, our friends die.

SAM Dad, the demon is coming tonight. For Monica and her family. That gun is all we got, you can't just hand it over.

I mean, yes, it is true that the demon is coming for Monica (Well, actually, he’s coming for Rosie, the baby, but I will let that slip pass. Sam is not interested in married ladies), and that with the gun they can kill the demon but it’s not all they’ve got. By this time, Sam has already had his big hero moment when he exorcised a plane in free fall so they could do that, then chase the demon again and then kill it.

But what is jarring is how he hears “a lot of people die, OUR FRIENDS die” and he goes “yeah, whatever, we have a mission to fulfill”.

Which is precisely what later episodes will tell us John used to do, and was the reason why John was not exactly liked by the general hunter population. And at the same time, it’s an eerie reminder of Wendigo, where Sam is willing to let innocents die (his family friends, in this particular case, just as he heard Caleb choke on his own blood) in order to get his way (revenge on the demon that killed Jess. NOT revenge on the demon that killed his mom, since at this point, Sam is still on the “I never knew that woman” train of thought).

Sure, his mind is in the hunt, and that’s commendable because yes, in the long run, killing Azazael would save more innocents (And probably stop the Apocalypse, not that Sam or the writers at that time know it), but it is still strange to see our nominal hero simply not care for his friends’ lives. I mean, at this point WE don’t know about Bobby, so the closest to a parental figure that is not John that Sam had was Pastor Jim and he just DIED.

Worst part is, this could be solved really easy: Just have DEAN be the one who voices the complaint, and have “empathic” Sam mumble that there has to be a way to save everyone (Which, of course, John will mention in a second). It would make Dean look bad, sure, but we’ve been told once and again that Dean never, EVER goes against John plans. Which… not true, ut we will talk about that later. The scene continues, and John declares that he will go to Meg alone, with a fake Colt and while Dean thinks that that won’t work, Sam has a different complaint:

DEAN Yeah but for how long? What happens when she figures it out?

JOHN I just...I just need to buy a few hours, that's all.

SAM You mean for Dean and me. You want us to stay here, and kill this demon by ourselves?

JOHN No Sam. I want to stop losing people we love. I want you to go to school, I want Dean to have a home. I want....I want Mary alive. It's just....I just want this to be over.

And oh, boy. Do this four lines again hold so much weight.

First, once again, Dean seems to be worried for John (logically, he’s their dad), while Sam is making the weirdest line in the universe sort of work because he’s complaining that John is trusting them to kill the demon, something HE wants to do and not four seconds ago was saying they had to do, as if it was John shifting HIS job to Sam. Seriously, I don’t want to think the worst of Sam but when you take out Jared’s acting, the text doesn’t do the younger Winchester’s any favors.

And finally… John’s lines that encompass pretty much Dean’s philosophy in the following seasons. “I want to stop losing people we love” is pretty telling, but what comes next? He actually WANTS Sam to go back to college and not worry about the Supernatural. He actively agrees that Dean doesn’t have a home, and WANTS Dean to have one. It’s as close as love as we’ll see from John to Dean in Season 1, and it hurts. It hurts because we can tell he knows he won’t be there to see it… and now, in hindsight with the finale having aired, we also know Dean didn’t get that. (And to be fair, this is the John who did deserve Heaven. Not the flanderized version we’d get in the future)

Although, ironically, Mary got to be alive again, so… One out of three?

(No, seriously, it’s obvious the writers didn’t even remember this speech when Season 12 hit, much less Season 15)

Ahem.

Dean is sent to get a fake Colt, while Sam and John wait for him. If they talked about anything, we don’t know, but when they exchange guns, Dean voices what we all know is true:

DEAN You know this is a trap don't you. That's why Meg wants you to come alone?

JOHN I can handle her. I got a whole arsenal loaded. Holy water, Mandaic, amulets...

DEAN Dad... JOHN What? DEAN Promise me something. JOHN What's that. DEAN This thing goes south just...get the hell out. Don't get yourself killed all right, you're no good to us dead. JOHN Same goes for you. (There is a long pause) All right listen to me. They made the bullets special for this colt. There's only four of them left. Without them this gun is useless. You make every shot count.

SAM Yes sir.

JOHN Been waiting a long time for this fight. Now it's here I'm not gonna be in it. It's up to you boys now. It's your fight, you finish this. You finish what I started. Understand?

Again, I wish they remembered all they had to get rid of demons before, you know, killing everyone willy-nilly. I mean, I don’t even think I know what Mandalac IS but hey, John says it works, it works. And once more, Dean gets a line that makes clear he is the empathic, loving brother, when it wouldn’t have hurt Sam to say it. In fact, it would make clear that no matter what, he doesn’t hate John. But nope, Sam only acts like the soldier we’re TOLD Dean is, while Dean makes clear that for him, family is more important than revenge (And boy will that come to bite him in the ass later, not in the series, but in this same episode).

Also, I have to admit. When I started this rewatch, John’s final line was just a good moment for John to start letting go of his anger. Now? After that horrid finale? It hurts so, so much. But it hurts more because I KNOW that there’s no way it was intentional. Obviously, Kirkpe didn’t know the series would last 15 years, and I highly doubt Dabb remembered this scene when writing 15x20. But even so, it ends up being Dean’s epitaph. OUCH.

In any case, the Winchester separate again, and we go into act three. Get ready for the feels.

John Winchester hunting alone is a thing of beauty. Seeing him scope the place, check the water tank and immediately think of a plan? Makes me wish Jeffrey Dean Morgan had stayed longer on the show. Sure, John became an asshole, but in this episode he’s still not that bad, we still have no episodes that make clear he didn’t care for Dean, and wasn’t textually abusive. And I am willing to bet that if JDM had stayed, John would’ve evolved more to be a Bobby-like character. But well, What ifs is not why you came to this meta for.

As John is hunting, the brothers are staking out the house were they know Azazael will attack. And while they talk and decide that they have no way to get the family out (In a nice callback to how none of their excuses ever work) we get to this little gem of an exchange:

SAM I wonder how Dad's doing.

DEAN I'd feel a lot better if we were there backing him up.

SAM I'd feel a lot better if he were here backing us up.

Where once again we see where the brother’s priorities lie, and I wonder why the hell the writers ever thought they were writing Sam as an empathic character.

Because yes, Dean is wishing he could be out there helping his Dad, proving that for him, it has always been about the family. Not the hunting, but the protecting. But Sam doesn’t want to protect John. He wants John protecting Them. And helping them in the revenge hunt, not trying to save others.

Sure, we know the brothers are there to save an innocent mother, but John is also saving a ton of hunters and people who, in the past, were nice and open to the family. And it would’ve been so much easier to make Sam look better if he instead had said “I’d feel a lot better if we hadn’t had to separate” or something like that, that proved he saw BOTH missions were important.

Seriously, I do wonder why the writers made these choices, and I wish someone had asked this at cons.

We go back to John, who, really, Is an amazing hunter even if he is a horrible father. Also, I wonder if he got ordained at a web church, in order to be able to sanctify water. That would be such a John Winchester thing to do, and I do wonder why the boys never did it too. ANYWAY, he hands the gun to Meg, and to her ally that came so that we could have a scene to prove the Colt is fake as the ally shoots Meg.

As John says, Meg was lucky the gun was fake. And once again, I do wonder what the plan was if it WAS the Colt. I mean, Meg was Azazael’s second in command. Why would nameless demon risk killing her? Or did he kinow the gun was fake?

In any case, this makes the moment where we can be 100% sure that Meg’s meat suit 1.0 was dead. I mean, she could’ve survived the fall in Shadow, but a bullet to the chest? No way.

We go back to the brothers, and Sam breaks every single law of a procedural show by giving this great speech about how thankful he is to Dean for everything, and how he needs to say that “in case” something happened.

Dean is definitely not impressed and reminds him that the only one dying today is Azazael.

As we see John temporarily escape from Meg and her muscle boy, we go back to the brothers who see the demon omens start up so they get ready for the final fight.

The brothers manage to save Monica and her baby, despite the very understandable interference from Hubbard, the husband (I mean, you would not react nicely to two strangers intruding in your house and yelling to your wife to not go into the nursery room), however, before Sam can shoot Azazel, he disappears into smoke (A really interesting question here is, WHY did Sam wait to shoot and then wasted a bullet, but I digress).

Going completely against M.O, Azazael makes the CRIB burst into flames, but fortunately Dean has already gotten Rosie out of it so the brothers escape the flaming house. While Monica cries her thanks, Sam notices that Azazael is still inside, and tries to go after him, but Dean stops him because he is not going to lose his brother to the fire. By the way, I am not counting “Dean stopping Sam from going into a burning building” as “Dean forcing Sam to do something” since, uh, he was saving Sam’s life and it’s something anyone in Dean’s place would’ve done.

At the same time, we see John getting captured by Meg and her muscle boy because he didn’t think about getting a third escape route (But honestly? That was pretty much a plot necessity. John was HEAVILY prepared for that fight)

Back in the hotel, Dean is worried that John is not answering his calls, while Sam is furious that Dean didn’t let him kill himself by running into a burning house. They have a nasty fight that mirrors the one they had back in the pilot, but since it IS a fight between the brothers, you know the drill. We’re examining it under Violence.

Once Sam calms down, he tells Dean to try calling John again. Unfortunately, it’s Meg who answers and she tells Dean that they’re never seeing their dad again.

And we get the first “To be continued” for the series (Which to be honest, despite all the little continuity mistakes I mentioned here? Is still pretty epic)

Violence

Well, we had to run out of episodes where the brothers don’t fight each other at some point, didn’t we?

This fight, over Sam wanting to kill himself in his search for revenge, is a very neat parallel to the fight they had back in the Pilot, over Sam NOT wanting to even involve himself in the family’s search for revenge. Which I know it’s supposed to be ironic and a show of character growth since now Dean is the one saying that revenge is not worth their lives but… it falls a little bit flat because the reason why Sam is so gung-ho in killing Azazael is, once again, a very selfish one and the way in he expresses it makes it quite clear. (Again, I do wonder if the writers stopped to think about the implications of Sam only getting really into hunting when it was about him or his losses?)

But let’s start at the beginning:

SAM If you had just let me go in there, I coulda ended all this.

DEAN Sam, the only thing you would have ended was your life.

SAM You don't know that.

DEAN So what, you're just willing to sacrifice yourself, is that it?

SAM Yeah. Yeah you're damn right I am.

DEAN Well that's not going to happen, not as long as I'm around.

This right here? Is a nice summary of the relationship of the brothers for the whole series. Sam wants to do something stupid, like, say, running into a burning building, Dean is there to stop him before he hurts himself.

Also, let’s make clear the use of first person by Sam. It’s not “We coulda ended this”, as in the family ending the hunt, but “I coulda ended this”. Again, at this point, not something that is a problem, but considering hindsight, we can see how the writers are completely invested in SAM as a sole main character, and write him as such, while Dean is more of the sidekick.

In any case, the argument continues, still not escalating to violence.

SAM What the hell are you talking about Dean, we've been searching for this demon our whole lives. It's the only thing we've ever cared about.

DEAN Sam I wanna waste it. I do. Okay? But it's not worth dying over.

SAM What?

DEAN I mean it. If hunting this demon means getting yourself killed then I hope we never find the damn thing.

Important thing how Sam apparently forgot he left for four (two) years and wanted out of the family business, now that he is angry and into the revenge thing. It’s not “You’ve been searching for this demon your whole life”, which would’ve been correct AND a logical counterargument against Dean. Before this episode, Sam was supposedly the brother who understood that revenge was a way of living, while Dean is the one who was Daddy’s little soldier. But here, when it actually would matter to the narrative, it is as if Sam’s wishes for a normal life are completely forgotten and it’s Dean the one who understands that there’s more to living than revenge (Which, btw, is consistent through the season despite everyone claiming that Dean needs Sam to keep hunting. All season, Dean has been giving Sam outs, telling him it’s ok to quit)

And of course, Dean here proves that Sam is more important to him than revenge for his mother, as he is willing to never get to kill the demon as long as his family, his brother in particular, survives.

Poor Dean.

SAM That thing killed Jess. That thing killed Mom.

DEAN You said yourself once, that no matter what we do, they're gone, and they're never coming back.

SAM Don't you say that, not you! Not after all this don't you say that.

DEAN Sam look. The three of us...that's all we have...and it's all I have. Sometimes I feel like I'm barely holding it together man...and without you or Dad....

Unfortunately, script doesn’t quiet convey the scene as there’s a LONG pause between “That thing killed Jess” and “That thing killed Mom”. Enough so that we can believe that Sam is using that second phrase not because he cares (in the Pilot he made clear he didn’t), but to make Dean get on board with the whole “I can kill myself if it means getting revenge” plan. In other words, once again, Sam is weaponizing Mary against Dean, and that is a really nasty habit the younger Winchester never quite shakes out of. Instead, Dean shows how he LISTENED to Sam back in the Pilot and repeats Sam’s words to him on the bridge.

Which is when Sam loses it and pushes Dean against a wall, Dean not defending himself at all, and yells that Dean has no right to say what Sam told Dean the very first hunt they had together after years of separation.

And of course, once Dean mentions their father, Sam starts calming down. NOT when Dean says that he’s barely holding it together, or that he only has them. Just when he mentions their father who is, in Sam’s mind, the one who can help him get revenge.

The fight ends, but Sam never once apologizes for what he said to Dean, nor for the fight. Which, by the way, contradicts his claim that Dean “always has his back”.

Emotional Violence

Whenever we have John on an episode, we’re going to have to talk about emotional violence and I kind of hate that because on one hand, I get how John could’ve been a very tragic figure that loved his sons but still wanted to avenge his wife, and not being the abusive bastard we know and don’t love that much.

When Sam and Dean explain about Sam’s visions, and how they started as nightmares but have grown in intensity, his reaction is quite subdued, but clear. He is not happy, but the problem isn’t the visions –for a man obsessed with the supernatural, his outward reaction to his younger son being a psychic is quite calm- but that they didn’t inform him of what was going on:

JOHN All right. When were you going to tell me about this?

DEAN We didn't know what it meant.

JOHN All right, something like this starts happening to your brother, you pick up the phone and you call me.

DEAN dumps the coffee jug and cup back on the counter and strides toward JOHN.

DEAN Call you? Are you kidding me? Dad I called you from Lawrence all right? Sam called you when I was dying. I mean, getting you on the phone? I got a better chance of winning the lottery.

JOHN You're right. Although I'm not too crazy about this new tone of yours, you're right. I'm sorry.

And let’s be clear, John’s anger is not directed at Sam, it’s directed at Dean. “Something like this starts happening to your brother” is not “Something like this starts happening to either of you”. Which is also a show of how good an actor JOHN is in universe because WE know that he knew. Missouri TOLD him point blank that Sam was powerful and that he could have known that John was around during the Home episode. But here, he acts as if this was news to him when he could ALSO have told them what to expect if that happened. (Mind you, I am assuming that Sera Gamble knew or remembered about Home’s script when writing this and didn’t just forget or was unaware that John was supposed to know)

Now, all season, Sam has been complaining and yelling about how John doesn’t answer their calls, doesn’t seem to care what’s going on with them. So it’d be logical and in character for Sam to say something here. But instead is DEAN, Dad’s little soldier, the one we’ve SEEN obeying John without question finally have enough and talk back to his father with some truths. And it’s VERY interesting that his first complain is not that John didn’t care that Dean almost died, but that he didn’t reply when Dean called from Lawrence. One could almost infer that Dean expected John not to care if Dean died, but was honestly hurt that he didn’t care about a case that could’ve involved MARY.

John, surprisingly, sort of agrees. He does say “I’m sorry”, which makes him the Winchester who is quicker to say those words… but he still manages to make a threat against Dean “I am not too crazy about this NEW tone of yours”.

Making it clear that before? Dean never talked back. And John doesn’t like it when his soldiers talk back.

It makes it hard to believe John ever thought of Dean as his son and makes it very clear why Dean never understood Sam’s confidence that Dean was the favored one.

Speeches and Apologies

I considered not including this particular speech, but then I remembered that Supernatural is ALSO famous for their big emotional speeches, and this is Sam’s first, and also, Dean’s first time listening to someone he cares about give him the “I am saying goodbye because I am going kamikaze” speech and after all the drama in season 15, I guess it’s necessary to do some dissection.

It is important that despite all the things that Sam has done to Dean, the words “I’m sorry” are never uttered here.

SAM Dean...ah...I wanna thank you. DEAN For what? SAM For everything. You've always had my back you know? Even when I couldn't count on anyone I could always count on you. And ah...I don't know I just wanted to let you know, Just in case DEAN Whoa whoa whoa, are you kidding me? SAM What? DEAN Don't say just in case something happens to you. I don't wanna hear that freaking speech man. Nobody's dying tonight. Not us, not that family, nobody. Except that demon. That evil son of a bitch ain't getting any older than tonight, you understand me?

This is not a bad “freaking speech”. I understand why Dean didn’t want to hear it, because it is like jinxing the mission (And, let’s be honest, it did), but it’s not a bad speech.

Except that, reading it again, it lacks one important part. Sure, Sam thanks Dean for always being there (Forgetting that, at least three times this season alone, he has accused Dean of not having his back and being unreliable. Which will ALSO be a constant theme in the series’s long run), but he never mentions the times HE did things that would be hard to back up. Which, again, I am not counting as a bad thing against him in this precise moment in time, since he is young, in his roaring roadtrip of revenge, and we’ve only know the brothers for a year, but it is the beginning of a series’ long crutch to make us forgive all of Sam’s sins without him actually doing the work to be forgiven.

On the other hand, it all goes to waste a bit later when Sam starts hitting Dean for the horrible sin of not letting him run into a burning building and kill himself so… it’s not really a “thank you for having my back” speech but a “You better remember, you never fight me and my choices are the best” speech in hindsight. Which… not good on Sam, no.

Double narrative standards

This episode is kind of balanced, except for that little moment where we’re supposed to think Dean is wrong for telling Sam that revenge is not worth their lives. So there’s not much to write in this particular segment.

Final Tally

Ok, back in the saddle. And after all that, I decided not to tally Sam’s little slip about not caring if their loved ones die as long as he gets to kill Azazael. Let me know if you disagree.

The count is still not good on Sam’s side, but as always, you are free to disagree with me, and dm me if you think I missed a tally or I should change one. If your argument is solid and canon based, I will listen to it and may change the numbers.

Numbers (or the TL;DR summary)

(Episode/Total so far)

Times Dean has lied to Sam or to a loved one: 0 / 0

Times Sam has lied to Dean or to a loved one: 0 / 3

Times Dean has been caught in a lie: 0 / 0

Times Sam has been caught in a lie: 0 / 1

Times Dean has hit Sam in anger: 0 / 1

Times Sam has hit Dean in anger: 1 / 4

Times Dean's lies or secrets have caused someone's death: 0 / 0

Times Sam's lies or secrets have caused someone's death: 0 / 1

Times Dean has abandoned (Or wanted to abandon) a hunt in the middle for his own needs: 0 / 0

Times Sam has abandoned (Or wanted to abandon) a hunt in the middle for his own needs: 0 / 7

Times Dean forced Sam to do something: 0 / 0

Times Sam forced Dean to do something: 0 / 7

Secrets kept by Dean: 0 / 1

Secrets kept by Sam: 0 / 2

Times Dean has blamed Sam for something: 0 / 0

Times Sam has blamed Dean for something: 1 / 4

Times Dean has apologized with words to Sam: 0 / 3

Times Sam has apologized with words to Dean: 0 / 2

Times Dean has respected Sam's boundaries and/or rules: 0 / 7

Times Sam has respected Dean's boundaries and/or rules: 0 / 0

Times Dean hasn't respected Sam's boundaries and/or rules: 0 / 0

Times Sam hasn't respected Dean's boundaries and / or rules: 0 / 13

Times Dean has made fun of something Sam does or has: 0 / 6

Times Sam has made fun of something Dean does or has: 0 / 31

Times we focus on Dean's needs: 0 / 1

Times we focus on Sam's needs: 1 / 6

Arc episodes dedicated to Sam: 1 / 7

Filler episodes dedicated to Sam: 0 / 6

Arc episodes dedicated to Dean: 0 / 0

Filler episodes dedicated to Dean: 0 / 4

Arc episodes dedicated to both brothers (or to none): 0 / 2

Filler episodes dedicated to both brothers (or to none): 0 / 2

Dean's Dropped Plotlines: 0 / 1

Sam's Dropped Plotlines: 0 / 2

#Supernatural rewatch project #Salvation #Dean Winchester #Sam Winchester #not very Sam positive #John Winchester #Season 1 #Season 1 episode 20 #SPN #Supernatural meta

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