#I DONT KNOW. IM INSANE OKAY.
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i rarely ever ship anything ever but sometimes i see two characters and get the overwhelming urge to make them qpps
#especially ig theyre both nb or trans#*if#i genuinely dont do much character shipping#VERY rarely i will get hit in the face w a sudden t4t/nb4nb romantic relationship idea#ESPECIALLY IF THEY !!!!!!! MET BEFORE THEY TRANSITIONED !!!!!#and then remeet after transitioning and both are so charmed by each other#something something confidence related to finally being urself making u look absolutely stunning#I DONT KNOW. IM INSANE OKAY.#IM IN A VERY WEIRD MOOD !!!!!#im never like thsi guys i swesr#x#x chatter#most of my rambling is in the tags. hiding my shame lol
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I'm begging you, BioWare... Learn from the mistakes of Baldur's Gates past...
#please accept this low effort meme while i work on Emmrich-inspired creative pursuits#hoping and praying and sobbing and crying#BioWare i'm on my hands and knees begging you to GIVE THE SWEET NECROMANCER A SOFT TUMMY#emmrich volkarin#dragon age emmrich#okay now im gonna start complaining in the tags so this is your warning#i just don't think im strong enough to withstand ANOTHER RPG with companions that Should Not Fucking Have Abs#like sure i could MAYBE suspend my disbelief that the vain wizard would use some illusion magic to give himself abs (still cringe)#or MAYBE he got really into crunches while he was depressed for a year (HIGHLY doubtful)#BUT THE EMACIATED VAMPIRE!?#like come on bestie#did cazador have some really rigorous workout routines that were conveniently never brought up???#im going insane sorry#i just have a lot of opinions on diverse body types in video games#and dont want them to do my man dirty like that#[insert joke about how getting down and dirty with him is my job]#okay sorry i think i got it all out of my system#if anyone actually read this far please know i love you with my entire serpentine heart
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GLAD EVERYONE ENJOYED THE ANDROID INFO UPDATE ABOUT INTERFACING DFGJNDGKGNMXGHNCBNM
#dbhc#dbhc sillies#the shepherd#my sona#art escapades#IM DEAD#dbhc doc#dbhc etho#there was a point I was working on pt 6 and I realized I never. talked about it#and I was like oh my god only detroit fans are gonna. know#erm#I should really do something about that#THERE WERE A FEW PEOPLE WHO CALLED IT OUT BEFORE PT 6 EVEN DROPPED#LIKE#‘hm. interesting you added that last part. interesting. hm. hm.’ LMAO#glad it did it’s job#I wanted to emphasize in that post how like. NOT OKAY it is to force interface with someone#it’s very… idk if violating is the right word but I think it would feel very invasive/uncomfortable#if it’s not something you asked for yknow#ANYWAY IM INSANE#etho and doc WILL make up. eventually.#if I may. doc ‘no we aren’t telling anyone what happened. it’s not a threat to them anyways and this isn’t the first time I’ve replaced this#arm. it’s nothing the other hermits need to worry about’ 77#you better let xisuma comfort you. i dont know if it’s safe to have another guys trauma in your brain. you should get that checked out
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Say I haven't lost it all
#rain world#rw#rw off string AU#rain world AU#rain world no significant harassment#rain world five pebbles#rw ragequit#sigpebbles#<- ? well not necessarily but#rw shipping#shipping#theu are soooo fun to mess around. i cant i feel INSANE you dont understand#they can be sillay. they can argue(lightheartedly). they can fucking fight. they can not always express fully that they care for each other#they can be dating but not really#they can be SO FUCKING divorce#they can love they can HATE#They can-#like ????? can you see it???#okay i know im definitely stretching this and that im pouring headcanons. but im having fun. so shrug#In my head they can have so so much#I rotate them in mt mind like in a microwave for so long that they melt and stick to the walls#i can't get them odf#pmpwbrrs
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fairly odd parents still infecting my brain have a redraw
og screenshot ^ im already working on stuff with backgrounds i dont need to make even more
#fop#fopanw#dev dimmadome#fairly odd parents#the fairly oddparents#fairly oddparents#development devin dimmadome#fairly oddparents a new wish#fop dev#fop a new wish#fanart#from here on out are my own tags#memo's constellations#✳️#:dev#ahhhh millions of different tags for one thing i did not miss you#I STILL GOT IT THO! it being creating actual full lined pieces#very fun drawing. back to the reference sheet and animation mines for me though#i dont think i said it but i'm actually animating in fopanw reanimated!!#this drawing was just a quick break and also to make a discord icon thats my own art#i havent been so hyperfixated on something since fuck. i dont even know#but this show is taking over my mind dogggg its all i can think about#i keep saying this but#if you told me like a year ago that id be being really ill about doug dimmadome owner of the dimmsdale dimmadome etc's grandson#to the point of adding him to my fucking kinlist which hasnt been updated in fucking months#i would not believe you#but. here we are LOL#if you think im insane. honestly i dont know what to say except watch anw cause Jeeeesus christ dev dimmadome is one fucked up kid#okay sorry for ranting in the tagsss certified memo moment of ranting in the tags. its over now BYE <3
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“Now… Shall we share a dance?”
[SR] Sinner's Garb Yuhua is here!!! For @beneathsakurashade's fan event~
I. I lowkey think I MASSIVELY misinterpreted the event's rules but--- But------ If I was wrong just pretend it's an alternate universe where he got this role 🔥🔥🔥🔥 (School has fried my brain I am so sorry) I also just came up with the name for the card on my own so I'm also sorry about that OTL I'm really taking too many creative liberties
Anyway um you can tell I've fixated on Evillious Chronicles before so. Yeah!!! UI-less card and voicelines are continued under the cut as per usual <3
~
Summon: A tale of seven sinners and their punishments… Sounds interesting.
Groovification: — LOCKED —
Set to Home Screen: The stage is set, and the actors are in place~
Home Transition 1: “I haven’t yet told you that I love you…” ♪ Isn’t that tragic? All these sinners met pretty ironic endings.
Home Transition 2: I heard that there’s going to be a party after the musical. I might not go, though; parties aren’t always my… thing. …but they did promise refreshments…
Home Transition 3: The best actors are the ones who understand their characters. Like, hating your past self so much that you’d erase any trace of it… I get that feeling a little.
Home, after login: “Seven flowers dance and sin is now released / I cover the ugliness of my true self as I continue to drown in lust…” ♪
Home Transition (Groovification): — LOCKED —
Tap Home 1: Isn’t this role better for taller people? I lose any enchanting aura I could have had when you realize I’m short… Well, at least these boots have heels.
Tap Home 2: Any performer worth their salt should be able to prevent personal feelings from interfering too much with their performance… in theory. *sigh*…
Tap Home 3: According to the duke’s story, the vessel of lust is a sword. I actually dabbled in swordplay for a year, so I’m not totally out of my element.
Tap Home 4: If I had to assign myself a deadly sin, I don’t think it would be lust. But I guess that’s what makes this musical so fun—exploring the narratives of people who did give in and sell their souls.
Tap Home 5: Aren’t you afraid of what might happen if you look into “my” eyes for too long? Haha~
Tap Home (Groovification): — LOCKED —
~
taglist (ask to be added or removed): @thehollowwriter @theleechyskrunkly @elenauaurs @casp1an-sea @nahelenia
@skriblee-ksk @boopshoops @scint1llat3 @nyx-of-night @nemisisnemi
@the-banana-0verlord @kathxrat-01 @lumdays @twistedwonderlandshenanigans
#my art#twst oc#yuusona#SevenSins&Punishments#I DONT KNOW WHY HE LOOKS SO BAD IN THIS CARD orz#i think if i try to change it any more ill go insane#but the fit kinda ate 🔥🔥#i might actually do a groovy for this eventually but no promises. sob#btw i realized i think they fixed the tagging issue but ill still format my taglist like this#bc it's easier for me to remember it this way#okay. im gonna stop here and go to sleep#posting and then eepy
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one of the most insane things about carlos is like. based on how you are introduced to him in ztd you think he's gonna be the most normal character in the game especially when teamed with AKANE and JUNPEI of all people. and he is the hero type main character archetype guy. but then you play suspicion where he literally kills himself with an axe because he's worried about being dangerous to others (? Is he okay actually. What the fuck). and then there's also get back/apocalypse where he waits 10 fucking months for akane and junpei to save them instead of stopping zero at all. What is wrong with him
#zero escape#zero time dilemma#ztd#carlos ztd#zero escape carlos#HES SO ????!???????#what even goes through his mind actually#the suspicion incident is the one that completely blindsided me a lot bc. it was my first fragment#as it was for many others. Carlos are you okay actually what the fuck. but to be Fair considering what uappened to junpei . in that fragmen#its . Yeah#like thats insane in a different way. but then hes also really fucking funny for no reason because he is So Dedicated to Saving His Friends#that its like. i dont know what it is but hes a really hilarious character overall#I could go On about how funny he is as a character. he talks about rhe matrix as one of his favorite movies for gods sake#but im mostly just saying how like. personally I fully expected him to just be The Normal One#thankfully. he is not! Lots wrong with him#maybe in comparison to the rest of c team but not Normal by any standard#ztd spoilers#cw sui mention#trevor.txt
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Ik we stevetonies love our ‘Steve pulling Tony out of a bender in the workshop’ trope but me? I LOOOOVE the other way round. A bad mission and Steve loses someone - he tried to save them but it was too late, he couldn’t get there in time. And post-mission he just holes himself up in the gym and stays there. For days. Working himself to exhaustion just so he can shave half a second off his sprint (half a second and that person would be alive), punching bag after bag until his hands are bloody and raw.
Tony is the only one who can get through to him like this. It’s only his voice that can make Steve pause, come back to himself. Sometimes Tony has to actively stand in front of whatever it is Steve’s attacking, which absolutely infuriates him, but damn if it isn’t effective in a way only Tony no-thought-to-his-own-self-preservation Stark could be. And Tony is equally as infuriated that steve is insisting on doing this to himself, but even though his tone is angry, his touch against Steve’s knuckles is impossibly soft.
He’ll drag Steve back up to the land of the living. Put him in the shower and clean him off, freshen him up, make him feel human again. Steve will already be healing, of course, but Tony still tends and bandages his hands - attentive to the finest detail, devoting every part of his mind to just making Steve feel a little bit better.
They don’t talk much throughout this. God knows Tony’s tried it before, but Steve is never in the headspace for it, and Tony never says the right thing anyway. But he’s there.
He runs his fingers over the back of Steve’s palms. Up his forearms. He strokes the sharp curve of Steve’s neck, settling against the quick pulse. Steve’s face is blank, but Tony is always surprisingly patient with him. He waits.
“I’m fine,” Steve will say every time, while his face will say the opposite.
“You’re an idiot,” Tony will respond. “I’m locking you out of the gym.”
He won’t. Steve needs it, even if it’s unhealthy, even if it’s agonising for Tony to watch. This is just how they get through.
But Steve will see the way Tony is looking at him- distressed, angry, worried - and it’ll break through the fog. The thing that always takes priority over everything is Tony, and even though Steve’s brain is screaming at him to get right back to it, he just can’t put it above Tony’s well-being. He couldn’t ever do that.
“I Guess I can take a break now.”
#stevetony#Steve Rogers#tony stark#um. merciless killing machine Steve tearing apart punching bags in the gym.#until Tony walks in and simply. steps right in front of the line of fire. totally fearless.#not even FLINCHING when Steve’s fist flies toward his face because he knows Steve will stop before it lands.#AND IT DRIVES STEVE FUCKINF CRAZYYYYY BECAUSE ITS SO DANGEROUS DONT FUCKING DO THAT JESUS#and Tony’s just like. okay. anyways now I have your attention can you PLEASE get the hell out of here’ etc etc etc IM INSANE FOR THIS#LOVE IT. GIVE ME ALL THE FICS.
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i'm very big on sabolaw because (to me) they just make sense. a whole lot of sense.
they both have their similarities in terms of backstory and lore: both of them saw the truth about the society they lived in at the age of 10, between the flames of a city, or part of a city, that they called home, and they both have lost an important figure in their life with whom they seeked freedom, and to whom they promised to keep their will alive, now living through their vows.
both sabo and law are in search of freedom. for sabo, it is more of an universal freedom, the freedom of the people before his own, even if it started as something he yearned for himself; for law, it's effectively a personal freedom, a freedom he wants to achieve for his own person, and for cora. but in order to achieve both of their goals and be free, they have to discover the truth about their world, and their lives. the true history.
checkered fate.
interestingly enough, in the manga sabo and law are described to both have a checkered fate; the five elders use this adjective to describe sabo's destiny, because he's surrounded by people with the moniker D, and law uses it to describe his own fate, when he decides he wants to seek out the meaning behind his name, and so discover the truth about the will of the D.
now, this is why i think sabo and law will end up working together, sooner or later. i know that law becoming an ally of the revolutionary army and/or linking up with sabo is a very popular theory and i'm so, SO glad it is! because it really makes sense, doesn't it?
sabo is destined to be involved with people with the initial D in their name, and was just now trusted with the task to deliver vivi and luffy the message that vivi is a D just like luffy is, making him even more involved than he already was with the clan and its descendants. on the other side, we have law, whose newly found objective is to find the truth behind his existence, thus uncovering the "true history", which will inevitably bring him closer to other "D"s and to those who always get mixed up with them.
if we add these bits of info to the whole imu situation...
imu is, most certainly, an immortal being, who became immortal thanks to the ability of the ope-ope no mi. ivankov literally SHOWS the fruit to sabo in chapter 1086!
and i mean, i doubt sabo still doesn't know who law is. he was in dressrosa, after all (also im so so so convinced sabo and law met sometime during the timeskip bc law saved luffy's life and iva was right there and how could sabo not know that was law who saved his little brother's life and how could he not go and thank law for what he did i mean- c'mon-) and he most likely knew about the alliance with luffy and everything else. so he should know that law is the wielder of the ope-ope no mi, and it would be obvious for him to seek law out in order to know more about the fruit's ability and find a counterattack to imu's (and, probably, the five elders') immortality. it would be so disappointing if after all these little hints they ended up never meeting. like, at all.
finally, sabo and law's dynamic would be soooo interesting!! sabo is similar to luffy in some ways, but he's also... completely different. i think law wouldn't lose his mind working with sabo, because yes, sabo is irresponsible and impulsive and a bit of a jerk- but he follows the plan, he's strategic, he's stealthy and logical, and he puts the success of the mission above everything else (that isn't luffy, of course). law can work splendidly with that. i also think they would have a very entertaining back-and-forth, both of them being as witty and blunt as they are. they would be equals, and have a very well balanced relationship. sabo is cheerful and kind, fiery and elegant, which is a good contrast to law's cold, serious demeanour, and heartless façade (because law cares just as much as sabo, he wants to help people just as much as him; he is a doctor, after all). also their devil fruits would work so well, so good together, it would be so cool- oda i'm begging you, please, let them be partners, please-
one piece gakuen and stampede showed us a bit of how their possible dynamic could work, and i pray day and night that we can have something like that in the main manga, too. i need it.
tl;dr: sabolaw is a very good pairing with a lot of potential that i hope will be explored in the story sometime in the future. please do consider them!!!
#sabolaw#revolutionary sabo#sabo#trafalgar law#trafalgar d. water law#one piece#i didnt specify it in the dynamic part but ofc theyre both unhinged and insane which just makes their pair 100x better#also uhh didnt know where to put this but i dont think law will join the ra as much as he will be their ally for awhile#im way too attached to the heart pirates to say they will disband and i think theyre way too important for law to just let them go#theyre his best friends!!! his family!!!#either they all join the ra or they dont join at all sorry#okay im done now i promise#fool rambles#long post
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Fantober day 31!! A free day again.
Recently gotten into HADES, and I think about them a normal amount (lie)
#THEM. THEM. *SHAKES HANDS IN AIR* THEEEEEEEMMM#Honestly it’s surprising I havent gotten into the fandom sooner I mean I have been a mythology nerd since??? Uhhh#idk. But every week I see a notif from OSP and jump around in my room because YEAAAHHHH HYSTORY MYTHOS AND TROPES YEAHHHHH#And greek mythology is where the interest began so why am I only NOW getting onto the Hades train only god knows. Maybe multiple. They got#a whole pantheon so idk maybe multiple ON THE OTHER HAND they didn’t know about their own relative OR who his mom is so maybe I give them#too much credit#jkjk jk Zeus dont smite me I listen to ‘’Thunder bringer’’ a lot plz#speaking of epic the musical thats what I wanted to draw originality because HAVE YOU BEEN ON THE LIVESTREAM YESTERDAY?#THE ANIMATICSSSS THE ANIMATICCCSSS THE 3D CAUGHT ME OFF GUARD. ODYSSEUS CASUALLY GETTING A JETPACK 💀 okay go off king /gen#HE GOTTA BE DANGEROUS MY FRIENDS GOTTA USE ALL HIS TRICKS IN HIS DOMAIN FOR THIS OH YEAH YOU CANNOT GET AWAY WITH PLAYING- okay I’ll stop#but we need a Hermes saga Im just saying. I love he. He’s such a dawling#…Also not me healing the ivantill trauma with a different silverhair+blackhair duo huh.#They bring me comfort I love my silly goofy god of nothing/blood and his boyfriend THE GRIM REAPER#my art#thanzag#they make me insane but in a good way#oh to be a guy trying to escape his dads house and then die to a butterfly and hopefully see death himself because he’s cute#hades game#hades fanart#hades zagreus#hades thanatos
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every now and then i leave my media literate bubble and see people saying taivan is boring.
#i cant#how#its literally#GUH#taivan…..#literallt i know im a lottienat person so like literally the most annoying ship in the fandom but yall#TAIVAN RIGHT THERE. TAIVAN RIGHTTT THERE AND SO SO INTERESTING#i do think taivan suffered from a weird disjointed storyline#but like…. the i love you blood scene. the glances in the lake. the DOOMCOMING SCRNES??? THE “WE’RE OKAY”???? THE IDEOLOGY DIFFERENCES AND#DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED ON ADULT TIMELINE#LIKE#OMLLL#insane#i need to draw i need to write#finals and some kind of not good in the head are absolutely kicking my ass sorry#yellowjackets#shep speaks#yellowjackets showtime#taivan#van palmer#taissa turner#taissa x van
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this nemesis ambition started out a little slow but I am getting closer to finding that bastard who killed my wife, and I’ll not rest a minute now that im far closer to on his trail
sorry got in character for a second
Anyways fun ambition so far very fucked up though
congratulations on joining the murder club anon!!!! depending on who you ask the name refers to either people who have murdered or people who have witnessed murder. usually both. actually extremely often both. it's a swell time you'll feel right at home (don't mind our collective skyglass knife collection in the back)
#im still not far into nemesis personally but im very much enjoying it#honestly in a weird way it feels like it's moving faster than HD did. which. is funny bc nemesis is like The gated behind item grinds quest#idk. HD was a fun slowburn where we adventured around gathering our rogues gallery before the action kicked in#nemesis on the other hand feels like im picking up halfway through a batman serial#fallen london#ask#it's WAY more fucked up right off the bat than HD was. honestly ive thought abt red honey for ages. that's so fucked up#and we LEAD with that?? Okay#definitely a horrors-filled ambition befitting caeru (the guy who's constantly going through horrors)#it really encourages you to get fucked up and freaky and in ur character's headspace at basically every step along the way#i only have HD to compare it too but HD was like. a lot more interpretative in comparison? at least to me. that's what it felt like#and i adore HD for that dont get me wrong here#HD just also waited until like. halfway through before it asked what the scoundrel actually Wanted out of its heart's desire#nemesis in comparison is right off the bat who died? who are you mourning? anguish. justice. there must be vengeance.#it's a delightfully different vibe!! i like it!!!#oh god sorry anon im doing the classic yin talking way too much in the tags thing again#i havent had much excuse to talk abt nemesis and what i think of it so far and of course its rp effects on caeru#but i do have a handful of thoughts on it#it's good. im liking it so far. it's starting very strong if nothing else. and i have no spoiler knowledge of what happens in the future#beyond the choice between rewards at the very end#and im SO curious how we'll get to that point. what horrors will we adventure through next? off we go to find out!#it's biggest glaring weakness so far is how horrendously grindy it is. and like. ive been warned and done my research ahead of time#im doing it on the same account im seeking. i knew what i was getting into. but also gots damn.#in comparison HD's 5-card lodgings and dreamgate feel like footnotes#anyway while im already way too deep into rambling did you know the honey trip gives you fate?? insane. why does it do that. hilarious even
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Old limbus women but one of them is my OC LMAOOOO
#bart#limbus company#limbus company oc#her name is Eglantine if you rly wanna finally know#she has more issues than she has atoms#lcb oc#ahab limbus company#lcb ahab#Eglantine is like if you put all the radiation made by humanity and put it in a old woman#she has beef with everyone that isn't her late wife and late child LMAOOO#i dont count that fuckass eye wrinkle as hag shit okay. i dont count outis and you cant fucking make me and i dont count hermann#old white people get insanely dusty its actually scary#also its a way of me shooting out my little play on ahab. shes kinda low-key infected by the pallidifcation but yknow...its ahab#everyone knows her deteriorating mass but its almost as if she has infested her own insanity as her faith which she has#thats just normal#and Eglantine....she has a severe hatred for those that exhibit a sort of almighty thought process in anyway#i almost just gave up a shit ton of Eglantine lore but naur....not yet#i need to reblog some other stuff up in here#these two will NEVER interact but like i took some liberties and Eglantine is about to attack ahab#Eglantine not being able to justify shit normally so she sees some shit and is jsut “close enough. welcome back holy ones”#I'm going to be specifically abnormal about pallidification hope y'all are readt#im a fucking weirdo when ut comes to anatomy and how the body works with said shit among other things
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i love dead boy detectives to death, and hope with all my being that we can Somehow pull off getting it back (through netflix or otherwise)
but honestly if we cant? if we get stuck at where we are now forever? i honestly think ill miss the potential s2 soundtrack the most
#okay HEAR ME OUT#weve got Hundreds of fics! maybe thousands! (i havent checked the actual count)#which means more Cases and Interactions and Anything that we could get from a new season#weve got fanarts and fanartists Galore that capture So much So powerfully#which means we can Almost see anything weve not gotten!#but the sound track? the Absolute Bangers we already got from season 1? i dont know what we have to make up for that#like. ive got a playlist im working on with all the songs i can find while retwatching. and already the Power the music has is insane#first of all the songs are just So Good? but also i can imagine the show (or parts of it) just by listening to them#every time one of the songs come up randomly i get to think “oh yeah! this song! from this show i love!”#its like a little constant reminder of the incredible scenes and characters and just The Whole Show!#idk ik everyones feeling their own stuff about all of this but losing the same“type”or“feel”of music we could get is really hitting me lol#does anyone else get this? does anyone else feel the same?#anyways if anyones interested in the playlist i can post it here once ive finished it :D#dead boy detectives#dead boy detective agency#save dead boy detectives#renew dead boy detectives#dbda#og
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whispering prayers into her hair
(a/n): requested by @sunny747 for Annie x Brady and ‘wrapping arms around the others neck when standing behind’. ie — annie and brady being two adorable people in a horrible situation and all their deepest thoughts seem to surface underneath a cold sun. and oh. annie wants to be a mom (distant sobbing). please enjoy this rather sad piece and commentary on two people struggling to hold onto each other in a world like this. (plz know i am sobbing !!!!) thank you so much for this prompt - quite literally has altered my life <3
Staring was the worst part.
At what was just past the barbed-wire fence; what stood between her and the world on the other side.
It had been six months and she was still standing here, still on this side of the fence, still staring at the opposite end of the threshold. Through the wires, the wood, and the dust. The world was on the other side and she was here.
Annie knew she shouldn't be out here alone - especially with the way the Germans had been ever since the British had dug those tunnels. She crossed her arms tighter over her chest and let a sigh escape her chapped lips as she squinted in the bleak sun, the warmth seeming to dissipate just as it reached her body.
Glancing over her shoulder, she watched as some of the men in the bunk room next to their groups began playing a scrap game of ball in the dust pit that could become a makeshift play field when needed. The kick-kick-kick of the pathetic ball bounced about, as the wind whistled past her ears and the sound of silence hung above. There were little-to-no animals around the place - no birds sang, no crickets chirped, there was no sign of life except for the American officers.
Otherwise, they were a dead zone.
A black 'x' crossed out a dot on a map.
"Hey, little birdie." Annie glanced over her shoulder and saw Brady coming towards her. Hands shoved deep in his pockets, his coat looking a little too big now on his form, his broad shoulders now swamped in the scarf and the wool button-up, he still looked like the John Brady from her first day on base at Thorpe Abbotts. Even with his hair a little longer and his cheeks dotted with stubble, and that scar nestled near his jawline.
He was still John Brady.
"Hi." Annie said, watching as he approached her, that lopsided smirk growing on his face, as his eyes fought to keep that grin growing.
He'd been growing quieter in the coming weeks, she'd noticed. Not majorly, not anything that would make her incredibly concerned though, she would always worry - about the crew and about Brady.
He'd say a little less at dinner, when they all sat around and were inhaling what food they had, and then when they were all sitting around, and she was tucked into her bunk, attempting to read (she never did get through any of the books or even a page anymore), she'd glance towards Brady's bunk and catch him in his silent prayer.
His lips a silent whisper, his hands clasped together, eyes and those long lashes gently shut. Everything about him calm and at peace.
And by the time she was curled up beside him, she swore he'd been whispering prayers into her hair, against her forehead and through their threaded fingers, like if he said it enough it'd get them through. And she clung to that more than anything.
He came to stand beside her, this awkward distance between them as they stood there, eyes locked on one another, this fence in between them and the world, dust at their feet, the war at their backs. Hands empty. Annie couldn't look away.
"How are you doing?" she asked him quietly, watching as his face winced slightly, like the question was more hurtful than the response, "You didn't eat much at breakfast." Which was true - his plate still had some oatmeal (they called it oatmeal) on it and he had looked withdrawn and distant. And Annie had watched, her stomach in knots.
It reminded her of when she had to get her siblings ready for school and sometimes one of them wouldn't eat - usually because they didn't feel good or were upset about something - and she'd get a pit in her stomach because she wasn't sure how to fix that. And she had felt that here. Watching Brady.
"Okay." Brady said with a nod, a stiff smile. She wanted to make him smile. More than anything. "Just wasn't super hungry." Annie caught his gaze for a moment and nodded slowly.
"I don't know," Brady said with a shrug, his smile falling, face focused on the world just past the fence, "just think this place is getting to me a bit." And she could see it in his face - just saying that, admitting that - she could see it hurt. He looked over at her and nodded weakly. "You know?"
"I do." she answered quickly, wanting to comfort him as her immediate response to the pain in his voice, "And I try to tell myself it's not. That doesn't usually work anyways, but…." Brady quirked out a small grin that faded just as fast as it'd appeared.
"You shouldn't be out here alone." Brady said quietly, hands shoved deep into his pockets, but it wasn't in a way that was scolding or even upset. Just a statement, a fact, something they all kept a conscious eye on.
"I know." Annie said quietly, her voice strained as she looked out through the barbed wire again, "I just….couldn't keep staring at the bunk room ceiling, you know?" Brady chuckled slightly, like it was some funny inside joke they'd all remember one day.
"I know." he said, voice soft, as they met each other's eyes again. He put on a hopeful smile, as best as he could it seemed. "The sun suites you, An, by the way." Annie caught his gaze, the small flutter in her chest warm, gentle and comforting.
God, the sun. So bright and gleaming even in this gloomy world that had been their ever-present for the past six months - in this bitter cold, this dull air - the sun still would shine even on days where Annie felt like it shouldn't.
"Who was your letter from?" Brady asked - it had seemed like he'd been waiting to ask her that question all morning - between his longing stares, those split second gazes where she swore she could breakdown in front of him and he'd patch her right back up. With all that, it seemed he just wanted to be there with her, to ask her that, alone.
Annie watched him, biting back her lip as the cold rushed over her cheeks. Something in the way his face was strained, like it pained him to even beg the question, knowing her response would hurt either way - knowing her response would hurt him, because it hurt her. The ache never dulled in a place like this.
"Dad." Annie said, her voice a whisper; quiet and shallow.
Seeing her dad's handwriting had sent her into a new dimension - she was sure of that. She couldn't remember the last time she'd even gotten a letter since being back at Thorpe Abbotts. So seeing his handwriting there, loopy and scratchy had made her heart ache in a way that she knew wouldn't fade in a lifetime.
You're mother isn't doing well, kid. She's really sick now, won't eat much or drink much, keeps saying something's tugging her arm. She's calling out for you. Don't know what to say. Keeps saying it's my fault you're gone. She's going down the tubes.
Annie looked to Brady, who was watching her in that unspoken way where it seemed everything and nothing was on his lips, that vulnerable glint of his gaze destined only for her, the want to reach out towards her.
They were always reaching towards one another, she thought.
In every lifetime there was, she was reaching for him and so was he.
But stood out here - in the open - with the eyes of the Germans on their backs, waiting for them to pulsate into the barbed fence just to shoot them, to make a run for it, she couldn't risk it. Instead, watching him made her yearn for every bit of him and more in those other worlds, those other times.
"What was he saying?" Brady asked quietly, tightening his jaw a bit, noticing her evident quietness. Annie sniffled and crossed her arms together in front of her and shifted her shoulders.
"Mom's probably going to be gone soon." Annie whispered quietly, looking at him, "She keeps asking for me. She's blaming Dad. For me being here. For me even joining up in the first place probably. It's…..it's basically a shit show."
"Annie, I'm sorry…." Brady whispered shifting towards her, that unspoken distance when they were outside the bunks room seeming to make a reappearance as he froze and then watched her as she stared back at him.
"It's okay…..it killed her." Annie whispered quietly, nodding, "Having to take care of us kids. Her and my dad…..one night, they were talking about it all. She never wanted to be a mother. She never wanted any of that. But that was what she got and that was her life and she drowned herself in cheap liquor to get rid of that pain." Annie looked at Brady with tears in her eyes. "I didn't want to end up like her."
Those inches between them pushed on her stomach like a heavy weight; it hurt, physically hurt. Annie glanced up behind his head towards the guard station, before looking back at Brady and his crestfallen face.
What hurt was, there were no amount of words a person could say take it all away, to magically get Annie back home to watch her mother's passing, to be there with her family.
War didn't care, the Germans didn't care, life didn't care.
Despite being dealt the short straw with a mother who wanted nothing to do with her, Annie still wanted to be there for the end of her life. She still had that want to be there for a mother who was still her blood. And that want made the guilt explode inside her chest and suffocate herself nearly to death.
"It's why you joined up," Brady whispered quietly, looking down at her, "in the USAAF. You didn't want that life."
"Yeah." Annie whispered back with a nod, "I'm sorry, you probably came out here to want to talk about anything else rather than this." Annie reached up to wipe at her eyes, but Brady only gave her a smile and watched her.
"You know I came out here because I wanted to be with you, you know that?" Brady said with a sad smile, "Now, c'mon, you got me interested now. What was it like? Joining up for yourself?" Annie watched him and couldn't help but smile a bit.
"It was probably the proudest I'd been of myself in my life, to be honest." she said, "Especially after the war broke out and I had enough money to get myself doing something more than farm work. I flew a few planes with kids from school. At the fair. Little things, but enough to make me want to do it more." Annie smiled up at him. "And sometimes they say you can't do something and usually that's enough to make someone do it."
Brady seemed to step forward and cut off that silent agreement to not make contact when outside the bunkhouse or in daylight hours - and he didn't seem to care.
For a moment, they just took to watching one another there, listening to the sounds around them, the chatter of voices in the background, the shuffling of feet, the linger of stale air. It was consuming, but yet, when looking at Brady, she didn't quite mind the sudden presence and stillness of the world around her.
"I remember seeing a poster," Annie said quietly with a smile, "in the local market. Surprised something like that even made it up, that's to say, even got put up in a market in Mankato, but….I saw it and." Annie looked to him. "I knew what I wanted to do right then and there. Then I signed up. 'Your Fight Too Sign'. Must've gotten the masses out because of that." And Brady juts smiled at her that wide grin, standing there like he couldn't look away from the sight of her. Despite where they were, despite it all, he could still stand there and look at her like that.
"What about after this?" Brady asked her, "Where you going?"
"I always wanted to be a mother." Annie said quietly, her heart squeezing as Brady's head tilted to the side and that certain, pained look erupted across his face as his fingers trailed to the side of her cheek. She nodded.
"You will be." Brady said quietly, encouraging smile on his lips, "When you get out of this. That guy's a lucky son-of-a-bitch." Annie watched him, her big eyes exploring his face before settling on his gaze again.
You, she thought, I want you to be that lucky son-of-a-bitch. And she couldn't seem to form the words, tell him that all she ever wanted was right here in front of her, but that look in his eyes, the war standing around them, she couldn't. Making promises that she wasn't sure would come true or not.
"Do you want kids?" Annie asked him quietly, watching as Brady smiled just as the word 'kids' left her lips. She managed a watery smile. "You'd be such a good dad. I know that."
"I do." he said with a small smile, "Always have."
"I know you'd be a good one because that one time I got way too drunk, you made sure I got into my bunk and had water and ate the next morning. You even let me use your sunglasses. And you didn't have to, but you did it just because." Annie said with a smile, watery grin, "They'll be lucky." Brady watched her inches from her face, seemingly taking a minute to simply watch her and then nodded.
"They will be." he whispered back, before licking his lips and smiling at her, "Why do you want to be a mother?" Annie watched him.
"My mother told me I wouldn't be one. A good one." Annie said quietly, watching as something shifted in Brady's gaze - from soft to protective in a manner of seconds that was enough to make her heart race, "But it means I can selflessly love this child that is my own. Nuture them into their life, fulfill them with all that is goodness and love that I never got myself. Give them a better life than what my own childhood was. I can give them what they deserve." Annie smiled. "I get to be the person I never had." The emotion swirling in Brady's gaze was enough to make her smile, eyes welling with tears, and reach out towards him and brush his cheek fondly.
"That's what growing up is sometimes, not for everyone," she said, "being the person you never had when you were little." Brady seemed to lean into her touch a bit as they stood there, cuddled in jackets and wool sweaters and warm hands, underneath a cold and frostbitten sun, staring at each other like it was their last time together ever again.
"What are you going to do if we get out of here?" she asked him quietly.
"We will." Brady said back to her, clenching his jaw, "We're getting out of here. One another or another." Annie stared at him. "I'll be heading back to New York, most likely." Annie cracked a smile at him.
"With your parents?"
"Yeah." Brady said, "I'll try and get my gig back teaching. Play some more music." Brady watched her. "I can finally take you on a date." Somewhere in that string of words, Annie felt her body shutter to a stop and all she could do was stare back at Brady with wide eyes, slightly glazed over and frozen as she watched him.
"A date?" she asked him quietly and Brady grinned instantly, and nodded.
"A date." he said quietly back, "You and me. Where I grew up. In the mountains." Annie couldn't help but watch him with some much awe in her eyes - despite how battered and bruised they looked, he was making promises that could be hard to keep in a place like this, looking at her the way he did. He didn't seem to care or mind and when he looked at her that way, she believed it would happen to.
She wanted a life outside of this and she wanted, somehow, someway, to share that with John Brady.
"I'd love that. With you." Annie said quietly with a smile, staring at him with wide eye still, taken aback by his words, his forwardness, his sudden step over that invisible line they had drawn when they had both started acting like more than just friends. When whatever 'this' was appeared more than just what friends were to each other. And they'd been just too scared to acknowledge that maybe there was something more there.
"What's it like? New York?" she asked him quietly as she stared at him. Brady grinned.
"You'll have to wait and see. It's a surprise." he said with a chuckle, "One that'll be worth waiting for."
"What about a hint." Annie said quietly back to him, "In the mountains and all?"
"Here," Brady said softly, placing his hands on her shoulders and slowly turning her towards the barbed wire fence and holding her there. Warm hands on her shoulders, pulsating through to her skin, she felt a shiver run over her as his face appeared above her shoulder.
"You see that out there? All that greenery, trees, shrubbery?" he asked her with a smile, a nostalgic twinge to his voice that made her long for the sight of where John Brady had lived and breathed as a small child - who had grown to become the person standing there with her now. What had made him to be the person he is today. Her heart clenched.
"Imagine all the birds out there, the wildlife. Frogs, birds, foxes, sometimes bears, the cicadas in the summer. Leaving the windows open. You can hear the frogs from the lake. Everything's alive." Brady said, his voice dropping, "So different from here." Annie tilted her head to look up at him. "You'd love it, Annie."
Staring at him there on her shoulder, she slowly felt his arms wrap around her neck loosely and hold her against him. Leaning back against his chest, enveloped in the warmth from his jacket and his arms and simply his body, she had never felt more relaxed in a place like this, comforted by the touch of a person who she was growing more and more feelings and thoughts for by this point in time. And someone who had seen her in far too many phases of life now than she would've thought.
Looking out past that fence, she did imagine a life in New York, near those Finger Lakes, John Brady playing his saxophone as the sun set, listening to the frogs and the cicadas and the birds, his gentle, jazzy thrum, watching his eyes glow with mirth and life, a quiet step away from war and this camp and the world. A place where she could let herself simply be. A home. With him.
And for a moment standing there, she could imagine her life where it was just the two of them, watching the sunset, listening to the world around them, being enveloped in the presence of one another. She could practically feel it, reach out and grab it with her fingertips. It was so close. It was right there.
#AS IF I WASN'T ALREADY AN INSANE EMOTIONAL MESS OVER THESE TWO#ANNIE PULLS OUT THIS WILD CARD#AND BRADY HAS THAT RESPONSE#LIKE#how am i supposed to live#(yes i know it exists in my head)#(yes i will fangirl tf out over them bc they are *everything* to me)#annie and brady u deserve nothing but soft and happy lives together after the war like#MAKING PROMISES IN A PLACE LIKE THIS#WHISPERS OF PRAYERS IN HER HAIR#TALKING ABOUT THE FUTURE#okay i gotta calm tf down#im ok i swear#ok#plz enjoy#dont mind me#annie x brady#annie bradshaw#john brady#john brady x oc#silver bullets#mota writings#masters of the air#masters of the air fic
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Y'all ever think about how bill is inherently unable to see in three dimensions like we are
Because he only has one eye, so no matter what, his depth perception is flawed MASSIVELY
#maybe that extends to mental view too.#Maybe he thought Ford would agree to stay with him because he ultimately couldnt understand the depth of his soul#idk man. i dont know#they make me sick#they make me insane#im not okay.#billford#gravity falls#bill cipher#stanford pines#ford pines
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