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mdhwrites · 1 month ago

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I'd like your authorial thoughts on the following:

Given Luz' and Amity's interactions across season 1 of The Owl House could Luz be considered to have been Amity's Manic Pixie Dream Girl? If so, how do you see that trope evolving (or devolving) over the remainder of the series?

So I have a romance writing lesson I'm going to hijack this ask for but first to answer it: Probably? I feel like one could complain a lot of good romance stories use a character like this so I don't know how useful it is as a label. Not only that but a common complaint I have about Lumity is how Luz doesn't actually try to do jack shit to push back on Amity or actually question her on her shitty behavior. Like sure, we know she doesn't like Amity being mean but at best we get a single confrontation about that that Amity doesn't take seriously. It's never a problem actually addressed and Luz never tries to evoke any other life lessons out of Amity. It's why Amity feels like most of her changes just happen because "Girl pretty" because little actually pushes her to change except the mere existence of Luz.

HOWEVER

This stops HARD come S2. Even by Winging it Like Witches, we see Amity going out of her way to manage Luz's emotions and fuck ups. Where she has to be constantly accomodating because otherwise Sad Luz is a thought she just cannot fathom, even when in shit like Looking Glass Ruins, Luz seems to think an apology is enough, or how she won't change by Reaching Out about actually caring about Amity's well being (such as not noticing her girlfriend getting hurt) but also now with her breaking her word and continuing to lie to her, both things that will also come up in Thanks to Them where she's willing to lie to Amity for months before sending her to her death on the Isles without her.

This begs a bigger question: What of these two that attracted them to each other originally is still there?

We know pretty easily why Amity likes Luz. Explicitly she thinks Luz is kind, pretty, earnest, stuff like that. If we want to read into her character in S1, since it's pretty clear Amity is already crushing by Adventure in the Elements and probably started getting her feelings in Lost in Language, it's because Luz is honest with her, open and free in ways that Amity wishes she could be or wishes her family was with her. It's classic opposites attract. It also helps that early on in the show, her family seems to have transactional love while Luz seems to not require people to prove their worth to her. With Luz, she knows she's always got her heart in the right place, will make up for what she's done and Amity doesn't have to fear what Luz is thinking because if she were to ask Luz, Luz would tell her. Hell, that last part is literally what Eclipse Lake is about. Luz's openness and honesty.

Aaaaand then S2B starts with Luz keeping secrets and lying to Amity. She also steadily becomes less of a weirdo, over the entire show honestly, and more just this troublemaker who seems to mostly do things just for herself. Who can easily be manipulated through the fact that she's selfish, such as with Philip and with Eda's mother. She very easily starts ignoring other's problems because of her own, like in Reaching Out, even as she'll claim she's focusing on you but all of her actions are the exact opposite. This is how we get "I don't want to distract you," while she is willing to distract Emira while healing Amity or joins the tournament because she finds Amity being in underground witch fights that could potentially severely injure her, on a day when Luz is thinking about death and loss, as BORING. Also, instead of Amity not having to ever prove herself to Luz, to not have to worry if Luz is going to stop trusting and believing her, Luz CONSTANTLY isn't trusting or believing of Amity and so Amity keeps having to try harder and harder to make Luz happy. To manage her emotions when, you know... That is kind of the exact opposite of why Amity was probably attracted to Luz. Did she understand she'd have to save Luz from herself? Sure but not because Luz would literally lie to everyone and shirk responsibility. She expected it to be because she accepted jumping Dead Man's Gorge so one of her reading kids would stop being picked on.

So yeah, why does Amity still like Luz? I genuinely expected them to break up in Reaching Out because of this. Because Luz showed that when she's miserable, she is NOTHING like what Amity saw her as and trauma and pain is not an excuse to be a terrible person. I would have still liked them to get back together but like... Otherwise, the show ends up saying that it's okay to lie to your partner so long as you have an excuse. That is abhorrent.

(Smart, Cool, Classy)

But on the flip side of things, what about Luz? Well, we get less overt declarations from Luz than we get from Amity. By what is stated... Well, "Cotton Candy Haired Goddess" and "You're smart, classy and cool," are really all we get and that's from Knock Knock Knocking. Smart is good, cool is fine, classy is okay too but they're very vague and the one emphasized, especially over and over, is how pretty and popular Amity is. Even back in Adventure in the Elements, where the show seems to want to be when they both catch feelings proper but Luz is a dense brick, those are the traits she focuses on. How strong, cool, pretty and popular Amity is. Luz's focus seems to commonly be on very superficial elements of Amity and with her misconceptions of Amity as the series goes on, it's easy to assume these never change.

If we try to go into Luz's character though like I did with Amity though, it gets WORSE. Luz is supposedly someone who fears rejection and has been bullied in the past. However, she seems to have zero fears about Amity as a bully or her being cruel to her. Admittedly, we do get two in character reasons for this: One is from Lost in Language where she admits to wanting to befriend Amity as a fiction trope, which is GOD AWFUL... But somehow the next one is worse? In The First Day, she isn't talking about Amity but she talks about hoping to find a 'vulnerable upperclassman' like one talks about a romantic partner. As such, Amity's damage is not something to help her with but something that continues to check boxes for Luz.

BUT.

If we are kinder, she likes Amity because of opposites attract. Amity is more serious, in control and smart than Luz. She has confidence that Luz doesn't think she has (examples nonexistent of course with how little Luz gives a shit about anyone's opinion) and a grace to her the clumsy nerd does not. So if we go off of those, does Amity lose those?

Yes. In S3A she seems to not be able to control her two left feet. She shows herself to be a complete disaster much of the time. In Escaping Expulsion, she's called out for letting her grades slip and Amity just loses all of her edge and real personality. She'll still continue to do things, to have things grafted onto her but her priorities are always Luz and not any of the drive or the like that might have attracted Luz to her in the first place. This is how Reaching Out ends with Amity caring WAY MORE about Luz's actions and the like than anything her father does and with her really just wanting the right to tell her father fuck you than actually wanting to properly repair their relationship like she claims. The goal is Luz. Always.

"But Luz could see who Amity actually was and was attracted to that!"

I have heard this sort of argument too many times not to talk about it. Let's pretend that's actually the case. That Luz was attracted to a possibility, rather than the person in front of her. That "I can fix her," is a good and healthy mentality. Okay, what is the 'real' Amity then? Well, she's nice, kind of awkward but can then step up to be a badass when she has to be.

I also just described Willow and Luz is not attracted to Willow. She literally never shows attraction to anyone like that. We actually do get an idea for what her type is after all. Her first blush is with a tortured, brooding dickhead in the second episode. She blushes at the twins who are teasing and rowdy. She likes trouble. She does not get attracted to Viney or Willow though despite both having very similar personalities to what Amity will eventually have. So why does she choose Amity?

Because she's the most conventionally attractive. That appears to really be it. It's the only thing that A: Amity doesn't discard of herself and B: that Luz seems to care about that actually stays true to the character over time. And don't tell me that Amity got smart in other ways. She is not a tactician and her strategies are always the bluntest. To reference Escaping Expulsion again, she is the one who posits going for a full frontal assault. Hell, in Falls and Follies, she's making mistakes in her Spanish studies. We don't see much real intelligence from her after S1. S3 made sure she has no class and Knock Knock Knocking explicitly points out that Amity is not as cool as Luz thinks she is.

Why does this matter though? Well... Because chemistry matters in a romance? Because in fiction, we should be able to understand what in the world attracts these two people to each other? Going, "It's love, they don't have to explain it," is the exact same problem as "It's magic, I don't have to explain it." It's purely relying on suspension of disbelief and believing that just because something doesn't have to have an airtight explanation doesn't mean it doesn't have to still follow the rules or examples you have set. People HATE when magic suddenly does whatever the author needs it to just as much as they hate when someone goes "I love you" in a movie after two hours of not seeing a single reason these two would get together.

As such, if in your romance story you have the character development of your characters remove everything they found attractive about each other... Why are they still together? Not even just because that's a thing in the real world but just in the fiction. There's no reason for them not to just be friends now so why are they still saying "I love you," if they even want to be friends still? It makes the conclusion of your work not scan and so your romance falls apart.

And I mean... Clouds on the Horizon even explicitly makes this clear. In that episode, Amity uses Luz as a way to calm herself. Uses how she'd tackle things, her care and the trust she has in Luz to make her not worry about being trapped at home. But is that accurate to Luz? To Luz, who in that episode decided NOT to go save Amity because she wanted to small chance that she might be needed for the bigger plan in motion instead? Despite having no role there and potentially making their stealth mission harder? Or who goes on to not engage at all with Amity's family drama, even as Odalia threatens to force to break them up? Where is the care that Amity was drawing strength from? The silliness that attracted her to Luz? ANYTHING that was there all the way back when that pushed Amity to kiss Luz in that episode?

Because as far as I'm concerned, Amity's Manic Pixie Dream Girl didn't just become a real person. She turned to sludge and why would Amity want to date sludge? See you next tale.

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I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

A Twitter you can follow too

And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.

#the owl house criticism #toh critical #toh #the owl house #lumity critical

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atdawnweryd · 2 years ago

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Lucia Appreciation Post

I wasn't in the fandom when S1 came out so hopefully this isn't something that everyone has already rehashed to death, but! I want to give some love, and my own interpretation to the S1 Lucia scene.

First of all, I know we can all agree that it is a thing of pure beauty artistically! But beyond that it's such a great scene because of how it shows a very critical moment in Simon and Wille's relationship:

We know that Simon is a caring person. This is one of his core characterizations that comes into play over and over again throughout the series (eg taking on the role of protector to Sara; playing peacemaker for his mother and Sara when they are not understanding each other well, and then working hard to make sure Sara keeps in touch with their mother while she's living at Hillerska; giving Wille 2nd, 3rd, 4th chances after he gets skittish and pulls away in S1, then not allowing Wille to believe he and Marcus are dating because it will make Wille sad. The list goes on!). Seeing someone he cares about hurting or needing help is something that Simon cannot turn his back on, he truly believes in giving people chances to grow.

So, as the scene starts there is a big conflict happening within Simon, and you can see it clearly in the amazing acting by Omar. When they walk into the classroom, he has already calmed down significantly from the anger he was previously feeling- now that he knows that he's not going to get expelled - but he's still upset. He's not shouting or defensive anymore like he was in the music room, he's listening, but still skeptical of Wille's intentions. He maintains a physical separation between them that shows clearly that all is not forgiven yet.

Wille has really hurt him here by allowing Simon to be put into a position where he might be expelled. Where the rich kids would get away with it while the outsider feels all the consequences. More importantly, Wille showed Simon that he didn't understand or anticipate how upsetting that would be for him during their argument in the music room.

But now Wille responds with honesty and sincerity. He doesn't try to beg, plead or excuse his actions, or worse - try and convince Simon that it wasn't a big deal, minimizing his feelings.

And you can see how much that resonates with Simon here. You can see his defensiveness melt away, leaving him feeling a little lost on how to proceed. Does he just forgive Wille right way? Is it enough? Is this relationship even worth it if this is the kind of B.S. he's going to be exposed to around Wille?

But Wille continues. He opens up and makes himself vulnerable to Simon, revealing how important Simon and their relationship are to him.

He tears up, showing just how scared he is of losing Simon. And Simon, who is a caregiver at heart, can't help but respond to that.

(Me too fr, let's have a brief moment of admiration for Edvin's acting and unreal kicked puppy eyes!)

This following moment right here is so important!! The emotional climax of the scene in my opinion.

You can see it in Simon's eyes, the exact moment when he gives in - when he realizes that his feelings for Wille and his need to comfort Wille overpower his own feelings of hurt and frustration.

But it's not an easy decision for him - he looks almost pained, like he has fought a battle with himself and lost. Like maybe he had no choice at all, this was only going to end one way....

He pulls Wille into an embrace, and it's forgiveness, emotional release, and relief that this is not the end of them. Relief mixed with a very strong feeling on both their parts that their relationship has taken on a new dimension.

Before, they had admitted to liking each other, but their relationship was limited to lighthearted (and sexy) hookups, teasing, and generally enjoying each other's company. The honeymoon phase.

But this is the first time their relationship has been affected by external influences outside their control. It's been put to the test, and although they choose to overcome it together, it leaves them shaken.

Wille gets his first taste of reality - that Simon comes from a different world and does not see things from the same perspective, nor will he put their relationship above his family or his morals (ok yeaaa it's going to take a few more lessons for this one to fully sink in, but I said first taste!). Simon is not a sure thing.

And Simon realizes that being with Wille is not all fun and games, but it's something he wants anyways.

This conflict is unpleasant and jarring for them, but ultimately leads to a better understanding of one another, and new depth in their relationship.

They end this scene with a kiss that is pure comfort. Wille, who craves touch from Simon when he needs reassurance of closeness, goes in for one quick kiss before he pulls back slightly, and they just breathe each other in, Simon lightly stroking Wille's hair and cheek. We very much get the sense that there is an intensity between them that wasn't there before.

This scene was necessary to have before their video was leaked and everything went to hell. I don't know that Simon would have been so certain about sticking it out with Wille, or that Wille would have tried defying his mother for Simon if they hadn't gotten this taste of being apart first, cementing their desire for this relationship.

Because Simon is a very good, caring person, yes. But - he's not a bleeding heart who will stick their neck out for just anyone (for example, he doesn't exactly seem bothered that Alexander's going to be thrown under the bus instead of himself). He's the kind of person who generally prefers to mind their own business unless he or a loved one is involved.

I think that this scene is the first time Simon consciously realizes that he's in a bit over his head with Wille, that the depth of his feelings for him far surpasses what he had believed. Because Wille is now one of those people whose needs Simon will put before his own. He has become a loved one.

#they love each other your honor #this scene is everything #young royals #young royals analysis #simon eriksson #wilhem #wilmon #lucia #long post

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tellmegoodbye · 2 months ago

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Hello everyone,

Happy LONE STAR DAY!!

I have a few housekeeping things to talk about before I return to our usual Music Monday format, but I know we're all excited for tonight so I will try to keep this brief.

If you would like to check out our playlist for the countdown event you can find that here.

Since we are getting new episodes now, I thought it would be a cool idea for a new way to participate in the tag. If you have a song that you relate to the new episodes, share them with us!

Please continue to refer to this post for any new Music Monday info, or if you just need a refresher on how the tag works.

Here's a quick overview of what Music Monday is for those of you who are new here. You share your songs that you relate to the show, its characters, storylines, fanfics, etc. All songs are added to their respective playlists and your explanations are added to the docs I have created for each playlist.

Reminder: Make sure to either tag me in your posts OR you can use the 911ls music mondays tag so that I can find and reblog your contributions.

Okay, now that we've got that out of the way, onto my songs for the week!

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Leave Out All The Rest - Linkin Park

I dreamed I was missing You were so scared But no one would listen Cause no one else cared After my dreaming I woke with this fear What am I leaving When I'm done here?

Don't be afraid I've taken my beating I've shared what I've made I'm strong on the surface Not all the way through I've never been perfect But neither have you So, if you're asking me, I want you to know

When my time comes Forget the wrong that I've done Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed And don't resent me And when you're feeling empty Keep me in your memory Leave out all the rest

This song is a reflection on the way we live our lives and how we will be remembered when we're gone. When I think about these lyrics in the context of Lone Star, they could really apply to any character, but Gabriel is who specifically comes to my mind for this song.

To me, this is Gabriel's message to Carlos. He's spent a lot of time reflecting on his own mistakes and has struggled to express the love he has for his son, but he hopes that Carlos will remember him as someone who never stopped trying and who always strived to be better. He didn't always get it right, but he looks at Carlos and feels so much love and pride, and he wants Carlos to know that and to see that.

Zzyzx Rd. - Stone Sour

Propped up by lies and promises Saving my place as life forgets Maybe it's time I saw the world

I'm only here for a while But patience is not my style And I'm so tired that I gotta go

What am I supposed to hide now? What am I suppose to do? Did you really think I wouldn't see this through Tell me I should stick around for you Tell me I could have it all I'm still too tired to care and I gotta go

I'm over existing in limbo I'm over the myths and placebos I don't really mind if I just fade away

I'm ready to live with my family I'm ready to die in obscurity 'Cause I'm so tired that I gotta go

This is a song written from the perspective of someone struggling with addiction. The narrator addresses his loved ones with a sort of brutal honesty about his feelings towards life, but it's also a song about love and support at the same time. It's about someone who is there for you even when you're in your worst moments and can't see a way out.

This song reminds me of TK and Owen in s1. Owen is ready to do whatever he has to do in order to help TK, and TK lets him in as much as he can, but these lyrics are also an realistic viewpoint on the state of his mental health in the aftermath of his suicide attempt. He knows Owen loves him and is there for him, but he still needs to find that healing outside of that support.

Impossible - Nothing But Thieves

Love, it stings and then it laughs At every beat of my battered heart A sudden jolt, a tender kiss I know I'm gonna die of this And that's because

I could drown myself in someone like you I could dive so deep I never come out I thought it was impossible But you make it possible

I'll take the smooth with the rough Feels so fucked up to be in love Another day, another night Stuck in my own head but you pull me out You pull me out

I really hit y'all with a couple angsty gems today, so I should probably round this post out with a more upbeat song. This song screams Tarlos to me, and reminds me of the early days of their relationship where everything is new and overwhelming, but it also just feels right at the same time. They've come to that realization that what they have is something special, and that they might have found their soulmate. Before they met, such a notion felt impossible to them.

@strandnreyes @lemonlyman-dotcom @bonheur-cafe @heartstringsduet @herefortarlos

Tags!

@eclectic-sassycoweyes @literateowl @carlos-tk @paperstorm @guardian-angle22

@ironheartwriter @emsprovisions @sapphic--kiwi @whatsintheboxmh @firstprince-history-huh

@nancys-braids @captain-gillian @alrightbuckaroo @theghostofashton @sweettkstrand

@toomanycupsoftea @corsage @certifiedflower @goldenskykaysani @reeeallygood

+ open tag

please tell me if you would like to be added/removed from my tag list

#har rambles #music monday #911ls music mondays #music tag

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emitheduck · 1 year ago

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Hostage Situation (Spencer Reid x Reader)

A/N: keep in mind, I’m on S1 right now. He is still soft baby boy, and nothing bad has happened (and i KNOW stuff is gonna happen)

T/W: guns, shooting, hostage situation, death, bad guy is on drugs MASTERLIST -

When he woke up this morning, Spencer Reid’s first thought was not that he would be stuck in the middle of a hostage situation. His usual routine was the same; wake up, get ready, stop in at a local coffee shop for some coffee, then head to work. Today was different, and he noticed it the second he walked into the shop.

Before he could even get in line to order, a man was cursing and yelling at someone behind the counter. He was just about to tell the man to take it outside to cool off, and then he pulled out his gun and shot the worker behind the counter dead.

Panic ensued, and just as he was about to jump over the counter, the man yelled for everyone in the coffee shop to sit down so he could barricade the door. This man looked crazy, and he was not about to set him off–sending one quick text to Hotch with his location and a 9-1-1 ping was all he needed.

The cops and the BAU were on the scene before he could blink. The only downside, this man was threatening to shoot someone else if they tried to get in the building–and he left his gun back at the office.

“Really not how I expected my morning. So much for treating myself.” A soft voice said from next to him, and he looked at the woman sitting next to him. Her legs were pulled up to her chest, and she had silent tears running tracks down her cheeks; but even so, she was breathtakingly beautiful.

“Did you know that only about 12 percent of hostage situations a year. In all honesty, 90 percent of them are resolved successfully. I’m betting that we’ll be okay.” He told her calmly, trying his best to keep watch as the man continued to move couches over to block the front door. “How long was he yelling earlier?”

She wiped at her cheeks before answering him. “I’d say a good 10 minutes. It seemed like he was talking nonsense though. Hate to say it, but I thought it was drugs.”

Spencer nodded. “Usually there are 4 types of hostage situations. A ‘mentally disturbed’ person, criminals trapped during the mission, prisoners revolting, or political terror. I feel like he might be the first option with the way he’s acting.” He told her, watching as the man seemed to get into an argument with himself.

“Do you normally spit facts at random or are you just making all of this up?” She asked him, watching as the corner of his lip twitched up in a smile.

“I have an eidetic memory. I can see things once and remember them for, who knows, nothing’s gone away yet.” He told her, watching as she processed the information. “You could really ask me anything, and I could more than likely tell you something about it.”

“My name is (Y/n).” She told him, eyes quickly snapping to the man who was holding them hostage as he started yelling.

He was yelling at everyone in the room; telling them all to be quiet so he could concentrate. That’s then the phone on the wall started to ring. “You! I want you to answer that!” He yelled, pointing the gun at (Y/n), eyes never actually leaving from his make-shift barricade.

(Y/n) slowly got up off the floor, going behind the counter and holding back a sob as she had to step over the dead barista to get to the phone. “Hello?”

The room was silent, trying to hear what was going on at the other end of the phone call. “Well? What is it?” The man yelled, turing to (Y/n) to shout at her, waving his gun in the air.

“It’s a call from an Agent Hotch over at the BAU. He’s saying that you need to talk to him.” She told him, handing him the phone over the counter.

The man snatched the phone off the counter, listening intensely to what the other man was saying on the other line. That was until the got mad, and threw the phone back at (Y/n), hitting her in the forehead before he turned back to hiding behind the couch.

“(Y/n)!” Spencer whispered, going over the counter and rushing to her side. The hit didn’t knock her down, but she was sitting on the ground, silently sobbing while a cut on her forehead was bleeding and running down her temple.

“He threw it so hard, I’m just so lucky I didn’t get shot.” She told him, reaching up trying to use her sleeve to stop the bleeding.

Spencer grabbed the phone off the ground, checking for any damage before he held it up to his ear. “Hotch? Are you there?”

“Reid? We got your message. This man is Gary Turner. Low level criminal, a few arrest records but nothing serious that caught our attention on the first look. Then Garcia found that the barista used to be his dealer–this man is addicted to methamphetamine and is most likely high, provoking him to shoot.”

“On average, a high can last anywhere from 4 to 16 hours depending on the strength and timing of taking the drug. That’s not even counting the initial rush of taking the drug which can last 14 hours max.” He paused, looking over to (Y/n) who was staring at him like he was crazy. “What should I do?”

“My advice is to just hang tight and wait for us to figure out an approach to getting inside. Last thing we want to do is spook him; it could provoke an attack.” Hotch told him, then let out a sigh. “If you get someone to talk him down, you could try to take him down when he’s not watching.”

Spencer nodded and then put the phone down, making sure to not hang up as the ringing could provoke the man further. “We can either wait, or try to take him down.”

(Y/n)’s eyes went wide and she shook her head. “Both of those ideas sound crazy, are you kidding me?”

“I didn’t get the chance to introduce myself earlier. My name is Dr. Spencer Reid, and I work for the BAU. I work for the FBI, and the man you spoke to on the phone is my boss.” He told her, watching as she processed the information. “You can ask me as many questions as you want, right after we’re not being held hostage.”

“What do you need me to do?” She asked, watching as he seemed to stop and think.

“Either way, it poses a risk for one of us to get shot. One of us could get shot talking to him, and one of us could get shot trying to stop him. He’s using the gun frantically, firing out of fear. It looks like he’s holding a Glock 17, which means it holds about 17 shots–16 now that he’s fired one. But we have no idea how many he actually loaded into the gun in the first place.”

(Y/n) dried under her eyes quickly, before slowly standing up from behind the counter, grabbing the phone. “Agent Hotchner said he wanted to talk to you again. Something about more questions?” She said, giving Spencer a quick nudge with her foot as a sign to start moving.

“Can’t he take the damn hint! I don’t want to talk!” The man–Gary–yelled as he stood up, pointing his gun at (Y/n) chest as he walked over and grabbed the phone. “Can’t you all understand! This wasn’t meant to go down like this! One more time asking me stupid questions, and this girl gets shot and it’s all your fault! All of this, it’s not my fault!” He yelled into the phone, waiting to hear what the man on the other end of the line had to say.

As he was yelling, Spencer slowly slid out from behind the counter, telling the other patrons inside the coffee shop to stay quiet as he worked to sneak up behind Gary, who was still yelling into the phone.

(Y/n) tried her hardest to not glance over at Spencer as he was moving; knowing if her eyes darted to him, the man in front of her would get suspicious and start to panic. “I’m sorry, he was speaking into the phone and wanted me to give it to you again.” She told him as he slammed the phone down on the counter.

“You give me this damn phone, one more damn time, I’m gonna make sure that you regret that decision.” Was all Gary could say before Spencer got to him, quickly snatching the gun from his hands and taking him down; holding his arms behind his back as he tackled him to the floor.

(Y/n) grabbed the phone. “He’s down. Spencer took him down.” Was all she had to say before a police officer burst in through the window. Different police officers rushing in to help the other victims leave the building while (Y/n) stayed by Spencer’s side. “I can’t believe you took him down.”

“Personally, I can’t believe it either.” Someone said as he walked up. She didn��t even have to ask. This was Hotch, the man she had spoken to on the phone–the man who told her Spencer was going to find a way out. “Nice work Reid. And I’d have to say, wonderful work (Y/n).” He told her, taking Spencer’s place so he could handcuff Gary before dragging him out of the building.

Spencer gave her a slight smile as he brushed himself off. “It was pretty amazing that you kept talking to him even when you could see me coming, even when you had a gun pointed at you. It took a lot of agents years of training for that level of calm.”

“I’m just as surprised as you are.” She told him with a sigh. “How do I go back to my normal day after this?” She asked him with a breathy laugh.

“Honestly? I really don’t know how you can. This is just a fraction of my everyday life, and I still can’t believe it happened when I wasn’t at work.” He told her, frowning when he remembered that she had a cut on her forehead from where Gary had struck her with the phone. “Why don’t we try to get you cleaned up before you head on your way?”

(Y/n) nodded, looking up at him before she started to cry. “I just wanted to say, thank you.” She wasted no time, quickly throwing her arms around the other man, not helping all the emotions that rushed to the surface. “I can’t thank you enough, because I honestly don’t know what would have happened if you weren’t there.”

Spencer was trying not to blush, still feeling his entire body ignite in flames. “It was nothing, honest.” This was one of the very few times in his life he seemed to be at a loss for words. “Would you be okay if gave you my phone number? Y-You know, to call me in case you start to experience any symptoms of PTSD? Those could be anxiety, nightmares, fear, flashbacks–”

“Spencer, would it be too forward to just ask if you wanted to go out with me sometime?” She asked him, smiling up at him. “I won’t say no to your number though, you know, just in case.” (Y/n) told him, leaning up and pressing a kiss on his cheek. “Thank you.”

He was blushing like an idiot, grinning down at her as his hand reached up to touch his cheek where she had kissed him, the spot feeling almost electric. “Anytime.”

–

“I’m telling you, she asked me out!” Spencer yelled as he stirred sugar into his coffee.

“And I’m telling you. I need to meet this girl and find out what’s wrong with her to see why she asked you out in the first place.” Morgan smirked, loving the reaction he was getting out of the younger man. “And all this happened because of some hostage situation?”

“You can even ask Hotch, he was there and everything.” He emphasized, watching as Hotch was walking by, a perfect opportunity to ask him a question. “Hotch, did the girl at the shooter situation not ask for my number, kiss me, then ask me out?

Hotch paused, his expression unmoving. “Reid asked if he could give her his number, she did in fact ask him out, but he only ended up with a kiss on the cheek. Too chicken to actually press one to her lips.” He told the two men before walking away.

“You know, for someone so smart, it’s a wonder how you didn’t get the hint she wanted to kiss you. You better kiss her when you take her out on a date.” Morgan told Spencer, giving him a firm pat on the back.

He nodded, processing the information as Morgan started to walk away. “Wait! How do I even ask her out!”

MASTERLIST

#criminal minds #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #matthew gray gubler #reader insert #reader

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laurel-finch · 1 year ago

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'I Don't Bite' S1.Ch06: Tether

Summary: The new arrivals settle in and the Winchesters make a reappearance... Referenced Episodes: mentioned S1 E12 "Faith," mentioned S1 E13 "Route 666," mentioned S1 E14 "Nightmare," S1 E15 "The Benders" CW: Kidnapping. Long chapter. Word Count: 8657 Recommended Song: Interstate Love Song -- Stone Temple Pilots Previous Chapter -- Masterlist -- Next Chapter

"No, Sam, everything's fine here," I answered sharply. "You don't need to check up on us."

"It's been three weeks and they're still not gone," he responded curtly, clearly frustrated by my refusal. "Dean and I are getting worried." I paced up and down the kitchen and glared toward the living room where my blond guest lounged. He picked at his nails and scraped at his skin, fidgeting – hungry, and volatile. There was no way I was letting either of them near Sam and Dean anytime soon.

"Dean almost just died like three times. He got electrocuted for God's sake. I should be headed to wherever you idiots are to check up on you!" I hissed into the speaker, cupping my hand over it. The action wouldn’t so much to block the sensitive ears of skinwalkers, but it at least provided some privacy.

"Absolutely not. Dean and I are fine, stay with your pack and we'll come to you."

"Jesus Christ, Samuel, you are not coming here and involving yourself with my pack and a couple monsters who don't know you," I hissed out. The mammoth on the other end of the line was finally silent for once.

"You there?" I jumped at the voice.

"Dean?" I asked, voice squeaking softly at the sudden intrusion. He chuckled at the obvious question.

" Yeah. He got fed up with you I suppose." I could practically picture his smirk. "Listen, if you don't want us coming out to make sure if you're alright, I'm fine with that-" I sighed in relief. “But-" and at this, I groaned. "- at least come on a hunt with us. It's been almost a month since we've seen you. A hunt can't hurt, right?"

I sighed and pinched the bridge of my nose. "Dean-"

"And bring the dumb blond one with you while you're at it. I'd like to meet him, maybe set him straight."

"I'm not bringing Marcus with me," I hissed out and I turned to said dumb blond. Dean was right, it had been nearly a month. Caeden was mostly healed and likely safe to leave, but the two newest mutts continued to stay in the bunkhouse, although at the opposite end from the others. Caeden remained silent and wary, following Marcus around like a shadow. Oftentimes I would hear them arguing quietly on the porch at night, just softly enough that my keen ears couldn’t decipher their heated words.

I glared at Marcus and he smirked back, delighted by my reaction. He wasn't a bad wolf, in all honesty. Cocky as all shit, but a good fighter and willing to help around the house. Perhaps that's why I let him stay, despite him not having said a word about potentially joining the pack.

Caeden, on the other hand, was a different story. He was moody, but not unlikeable – in fact, he got along rather well with Sasha and Andrew, although Booth was still rather cold to them both. But Caeden's allegiance fell with Marcus, and I had to admit it made my fur stand on end to think there was a mutt running around my pack that wasn't one of mine.

"You still with me?"

"Yeah, Dean, I'm here," I answered as I propped the phone up on my shoulder again and continued marching around the kitchen with a bowl of cookie dough in my arms. "Sorry, I'm helping Andrew with something."

“Bring him with you if you won’t bring the other one," Dean replied light-heartedly. "From what I've seen of him, I feel like he could use a good fight." My face fell at this.

"If anyone's going to teach Andrew how to fight, it's going to be me or Booth."

"You could teach him all about the teeth and claws side of it, but I could teach him the old one-two," he laughed and I heard a swish from the other end of the phone, almost like he had done the moves himself.

I chuckled. "I think I can handle that too, Dean, but thank you for the offer." He hummed in response and I heard a loud plop, almost as if he had dropped onto a hard cushion - likely a motel bed. "Where are you now?"

" Saginaw, Michigan, " his voice sounded clipped, as though he was unsure of himself. Reluctant to tell me more. "... Sammy had another vision," he finally relented. My eyes widened at this and I put the mixing bowl on one of the countertops, straightening the phone and holding it against my ear.

"What'd he see this time?"

"Weird stuff going on in some house. He saw a garage first, smoke in it, one of the family members dead. We scoped out the house and didn't see anything-" I heard a clatter from behind me and saw Marcus leaning against the edge of the counter, holding the spoon I had been using on the cookie dough to his mouth, a smirk resting on his lips. I growled at him and motioned for him to put the spoon down. " - Sammy had another vision later of one of the other family members getting his head chopped by a window. "

"A window? You've got to be kidding me."

"Nope." I turned back to Marcus and frowned, seeing him lick the batter off the spoon. He smiled guiltily.

I pulled the phone away from my ear and covered the mic. "If you don't put the spoon down right now, I'm going to shove it up your scrawny ass," I hissed. Marcus tilted his head a bit and grinned before dropping the now dirty spoon in the sink. I scoffed and returned the phone to my ear.

"Listen to this" Dean continued, "There's no sign of anything paranormal in that house. No graveyards to native rituals, no curses or murders. Nothing. Zilch."

"Poltergeist maybe?" I heard another loud clatter behind me and turned to see Andrew shoving Marcus out of the kitchen. Andrew looked furious, and Marcus was quickly learning not to mess with the younger man's food, much to my amusement.

"Don't think so. But, we wouldn't mind the help, if you could come down – or I guess drive up – and help us out."

"I think you've got this one covered, Dean." Not that I didn’t want to, but I didn’t trust the strange pair of monsters alone with my pack. Andrew's ears pricked at the mention of the eldest Winchester. He seemed rather excited to meet him again and was very curious about the brothers. "But so help me God, Dean Winchester, if you get hurt I will tear you limb from limb."

He hummed in response. "Sorry sweetheart, I've heard that threat loads of times. Pretty much used to it by now."

"In that case, maybe I'll just turn you into my own personal chew toy. Or even better, keep you here and let the pack snack on you from time to time."

"Getting to see you every day doesn't sound too awful to me."

My face flushed and I took a few moments to recollect myself, jaw going slack. I shook my head to clear my thoughts before speaking. "Let me know when you guys are done with this hunt. Maybe I'll see you on the next one."

"Noted. I'll catch you later, fido."

"Stay safe, Winchester." I hung up and put my phone back in my pocket. I whirled around with my hands on my hips to face the two troublemakers, only to find more than two sets of eyes staring back at me. "When the hell did you all get here?" I asked, eyes widening in surprise.

"When you started blushing," responded Marcus. "It was pretty cute, you know. What'd your boyfriend say now to get you so worked up?"

"Shut up, Marcus," countered Sasha. Although small, she was turning out to be a little ball of wrath. "That's her business."

"You're just saying that cause she's your boss," Caeden said dryly for the first time that day, backing up his partner.

"No, I'm saying that because she's my friend," she snapped back, head held high in defiance. Sasha, for all her loving personality, did not tolerate disrespect or even a hint thereof. She scowled up at the two much taller men, dark eyes reminding them of their temporary place within the pack. An involuntary shiver ran up Marcus’ spine, which he quickly covered by ruffling his hair, the movement distracting from his uneasiness..

"Thank you, Sasha. I appreciate it, but it was really nothing." I looked pointedly toward Marcus. "He's not my boyfriend, and he just said something that caught me off guard."

The blond shrugged. "If you say so." He suddenly clapped his hands together rather suddenly, making even Booth jump. "You know what we should do tonight? We should all go hunting!"

"Sounds like a fine idea to me. I wouldn’t mind getting a good stretch in," agreed Booth, rolling his shoulders. "’S long as it’s animals."

"We went hunting only a few days ago. We don't need any more food," added Andrew, looking rather confused by the sudden change of subject.

"Then how about a chase?" suggested Marcus, a wide grin spanning his face.

"A chase?" I asked, cocking a brow.

"Like... what is it humans call it, capture the flag?” Marcus nudged Caeden in the arm, catching the dark-skinned man’s attention. “You told me about it once, remember? Your teammates can get captured and you have to rescue them while still defending your territory."

"We could use deer hides as our flags," offered Andrew, giving me a hopeful look. I looked among each of my pack members, searching for any sign of opposition to this. Finally, seeing none I turned back to Marcus.

"Why are you offering up a game so suddenly?"

His smile widened if that was at all possible, a twinkle of mischief in his eyes. He chose his words carefully, mulling them over before they slipped easily off his irritating tongue. "Just a bit of fun with the gang, right?"

Caeden stiffened.

—

The teams were set, with Booth, Andrew, and myself on one team and Sasha, Caeden, and Marcus on the other. Sasha didn't seem all that excited to be partnered with the two newbies, but she promised to do her best and try to have fun.

The game was taking place in the woods around the glade. Sasha's team's skin had been placed somewhere to the west, whereas ours was to the east. We were given a limited range to run in, sort of like boundaries for the game. If a player was captured, they had to go back to the glade and wait to be ‘rescued.’

The sun was setting, its pink rays dappling the horizon and golden clouds resting over the treetops. It would be dark soon, a time when skinwalkers did their best work.

"What's the plan here, boss?" chirped Andrew, practically skipping along beside you.

"I think we should have Booth stay around the skin," I answered coolly. Booth whipped around to look at me in confusion. "You're better at running short distances quickly, and you fight more defensively. I've seen you take down a deer, Booth, you're not built for long-distance." He quirked an almost challenging eyebrow at this, but nodded.

"Then what should you and I do?" Andrew chimed again. His eyes were lit with an almost childish joy. Sometimes I would forget that he was only barely an adult, but moments like this made me remember.

"You are built for speed, unlike Booth," I said with a teasing look over my shoulder at the silvering man. Booth scoffed and crossed his arms. "So I think you should help me herd them. Push them towards me, and I'll catch them. We can press forward into their territory and hopefully get their skin without too much trouble."

"What if one of us gets caught?" Booth questioned.

"Then Andrew will go rescue them. He's the fastest, and he's not likely to get caught – but if he does, then I'll go."

"And what if you both get captured?"

I turned to him, a wide grin on my face. "Then you'd better fight like hell."

I turned sharply, hearing a loud howl to the west, signaling that the game was starting. I yipped in response, saluted my beta, and took off into the woods at a dead sprint, Andrew hot on my heels.

I gestured to the left and made a motion for Andrew to shift. He nodded back and jumped into his russet form and took off towards the left while I veered to the right. I slowed my pace and eventually walked slowly through the woods, still having yet to shift. It could be a while until someone made a move, so I stood and waited.

I shook my furred head, the brown undertones receding with the waning light of the sun. It was twilight now, and it was steadily getting too dark to see in my human form. I paced through the woods and listened for an inkling of movement, hearing none. Not even a mouse burrowing beneath the fallen leaves.

I heard a crash to my rear, and before I could fully turn to face it I was knocked to the ground with a paw on my throat and a pair of jaws near my ear, snarling at me. I snapped and twisted, kicking my back legs up with enough force to roll over and pin my attacker beneath me. I snarled and was met with an equally vicious growl.

Caeden swiped up at me, with a brown, wiry furred paw, connecting with the side of my jaw and pushing my head away. I hissed and smacked my right paw against his cheek, causing him to yelp and throw his hind legs up, pushing against my sternum. His legs shook under my weight, as my furred form was much larger than his. I snapped at his throat, struggling to connect my jaws with his neck.

In a whirlwind of teeth and claws, I was tossed to the side, a small scrape running down my shoulder and Caeden rushing towards me. I catapulted forward, meeting his chest with mine and pushing him over backward. He fell onto his back with a whine and rolled onto his stomach. I stood over him and sunk my teeth lightly into his scruff, pulling the loose skin gently. He growled in response, but didn't resist. He had been captured.

The two of us shifted back and I got off of him, allowing him to stand. "Sorry, Caed. Maybe Marcus'll rescue you."

"Doubt it," he said, running a hand through his short hair, tight curls cropped close to his skull. His eyes had returned from their vibrant blue to a warm brown that neatly matched his skin tone, his short, wiry hair sticking up at odd angles. "He's probably too busy getting your skin from Booth." He smirked and briskly walked away from me, headed towards the capture zone. "That was a good fight. Looking forward to a rematch at some point."

"I think that's the nicest you've ever been to me!" I called after him, unable to hide the smile blossoming on my face. He stiffened at my words.

"Don't get used to it," he growled out over his shoulder before disappearing into the woods. In the distance, I heard his howl signaling to his team that he had been captured.

—

The game finally ended, after what felt like hours of playing. In the end, Marcus had been caught trying to rescue Caeden, leaving only Sasha guarding their skin. Andrew, to my surprise, had been caught as well before I encountered Caeden. He had apparently run right into Marcus, who had reacted quickly with jaws around Andrew's neck. The boy was fast, apparently too fast for his own good.

We had all returned to the main house now, faces flushed from running, but still excited by the night's events. Andrew had pulled some homemade ice cream from the freezer, and it was surprisingly delicious. Together, we sat on the couch laughing with each other and enjoying our ice cream.

"He came out of nowhere!" Marcus exclaimed cheerfully, laughing his head off and his wavy straw-colored hair bouncing wildly. "I just heard this weird thumping and then suddenly BOOM! There was Andrew, flying towards me! Not sure how I reacted, but the next thing I knew I had my teeth around his throat."

Andrew laughed at this and held his bowl in the air, like a small salute. "I didn't even see you there. I just knew I had hit something and then all of a sudden I was on my back!"

The group laughed heartily, Marcus playfully bumping the younger skinwalker with his shoulder. "Andrew, you think running into me was scary, imagine Booth and this one charging you out of nowhere!” he said, pushing at my shoulder slightly. “God, it looked like she was almost flying, I swear, her paws weren't even touching the ground!"

I chuckled at this and brushed a lock of hair out of my face. "It felt like I was flying, honestly. I was so set on winning at that point."

"I could hardly see you, let alone keep up with you," Booth praised. "It was so dark that I thought I was going to lose you in the woods. My legs still ache from trying keeping up."

I laughed heartily and grinned at him. "You needed the workout, old man,” I teased, bumping his shoulder affectionately. “You're getting soft in your old age."

He growled playfully. "I bet you wouldn't say that if you and I took a turn in the ring." I chuckled.

"Try me, I bet I could knock you on your ass any day." The group erupted into laughter once more at this declaration. I pointed to Caeden from across the group, narrowing my eyes in jest. “You and I need a rematch before you two head out – that fight was far too short for my liking.”

Caeden nodded slowly, not meeting my gaze – a common occurrence with him. Before he had a chance to answer, Marcus spoke up. "Who said anything about 'heading out?’" he questioned and flashed a cocky smirk. My eyes widened at his declaration, heart thumping loudly for just a moment.

Caeden froze, back stiffening. His eyes were wide with shock and… was that fear? He angled his head slightly to glare at Marcus for his rash words. “Marcus…”

"You mean you two are planning to stay?" Andrew asked gleefully, having taken a shine to the two men.

"We had discussed in the past never joining a pack,” Marcus added, suddenly in complete seriousness. I frowned at his words, watching his mind slowly turn as he thought up an answer. The group fell silent, waiting for him to continue. “We’ve both had a few rough experiences, but…” he fell silent for just a moment and gave Caeden’s hand an affectionate squeeze. “I’ve always wanted a family – both of us have. This is the closest we’re going to get, and, unfortunately-” his green eyes lifted to meet mine in a sturdy, accepting gaze, “- I trust you.”

My gaze flicked to Caeden, whose jaw was set firmly. His gaze was on the ground, but he didn’t pull away from Marcus or the rest of the group. He seemed… uncomfortable, but resolved. For now. This didn’t seem to be the way he wanted to make the announcement.

My heart hammered. These two rogues trusted me? My stomach flipped. Perhaps Missouri was right – maybe I was doing something correct. I couldn’t help the soft, gleeful smile that spread on my cheeks. They trusted me.

“If you’ll have us,” Caeden tacked on curtly, staring down at the ground. His jaw was tight, his shoulders squared. He seemed to wrestle with his decision and I wondered how long he would reasonably stay. This didn’t seem to be the life for him, but his willingness to try made me smile.

The six of us sat in silence, my three original companions open-mouthed with surprise. "Of course, you two are welcome here," I answered warmly, my tone as even and tender as I could muster so as not to spook them. It would be a long road to adapt to the new presence, but it seemed like it would be worth it in the end. Despite their troubles, they seemed like good people.

In a flurry of motion I was suddenly dragged into a hug, the six of us crowded so tightly there was hardly space to move. A bubbly laugh escaped me as I pulled them closer, heart thudding with a sense of joy and relief. My family had just grown again, and I couldn't have been more excited.

—

"So, old flames and an evil car, huh? Sorry I missed it," I called out to the Winchesters before they even had a chance to exit the Impala. It had been a week since my last call with them, almost a week and a half since Marcus and Caeden had decided to stay.

Dean whipped to his younger brother, eyes filled to the brim with shock. "Dude, you promised not to mention that!"

"Just the fact that you made Sam promise tells me everything I need to know," I teased, earning a head shake from Dean. As Sam approached the front porch he opened his arms wide and I practically leapt into his bear hug, the both of us laughing cheerfully.

"Nice to see you again, too," he said, finally setting me down.

"It feels like it's been so long," I grinned, eyes flicking between the boys.

"Just over a month, Courage," answered Dean as he rummaged through the trunk of his immaculate car. I scowled. Courage the Cowardly Dog? Really? "We brought some goodies too. Any place we can drop them?"

"In the kitchen. Andrew and Caeden are working on lunch – Drew's making his famous grilled cheese."

"Grilled cheese, huh? Sounds fancy," Sam teased, taking a bag of groceries from his older brother. As Dean approached, the scent of cherries nearly knocked me over – it was surprisingly strong. It smelled suspiciously like the cherry pie he so loved-

“You stopped for pie?” I asked.

“Always. Brought some with us, too.”

I grinned as the two boys headed inside and were quickly greeted by Andrew, who was practically jumping for joy upon seeing them. He offered a hug to Sam, who took it, whereas Dean opted for a handshake. I paced into the kitchen to see Caeden drying off his hands with a dishtowel. It looked as though he had just washed whatever couldn't fit into the dishwasher, which I'm sure Sasha would appreciate.

"Caeden, meet the Winchesters," I said, gesturing to the Winchesters. "Sam and Dean, meet Caeden," Caeden remained quiet, eyes fixated on the cloth wrapped around his hands. After several long moments, he waved halfheartedly to the Winchesters before returning to the side dishes, not bothering to meet their gazes.

Sam cleared his throat and looked around the kitchen, effectively breaking the silence. "Where're Booth and Sasha?" he asked quizzically, scanning the yard outside.

“Sasha’s out in the bunkhouse sorting out the last of the laundry, last I checked. Booth and Marcus-” I hesitated for a moment and caught Caeden’s eye. I had considered introducing them to Marcus, but was unsure if he was… detoxed enough for that. Caeden, at least, flipped back and forth between vegetarian and traditional diets. But Marcus had always been traditional up until now.

Caeden seemed to understand the meaning in my gaze and he nodded affirmatively. I spun on my heels to face the Winchesters. "I'm going to go find Booth and Marcus. Care to join me?"

"Will we be able to keep up with you?" Sam asked jokingly.

"How fast can you run?"

The boys paled.

—

I jogged through the woods, the boys not far behind me, and my ears pricked to any sound of my pack members. My boots hit the forest floor softly, hardly making a sound other than the crunching of leaves, whereas the boys thumped along behind me.

I yipped as I heard the sound of rustling to my left and veered in that direction. A playful growl caught my attention and I raced towards it, picking up the pace and leaving the boys behind me. I heard Dean groan and pick up the pace. I burst forth into a clearing, jumping into the air and landing on two feet, covered in dirt but content.

Booth and Marcus were sparring together, although it looked more like Booth was lazily fighting a puppy. The older dog had so much more experience, despite Marcus's innate strength in pedigree. I was happy to have both of them by my side.

The Winchesters stood by my sides, watching the fight with wide eyes. To them, it must have looked like the two skinwalkers were trying to kill each other. We had no rules against drawing blood or injury in a fight, as long as the injury healed quickly. Fur was flying and Marcus had a small cut above his eye, blood matting his fur.

I whistled at the two fighting dogs and Marcus's attention immediately switched to me, unluckily for him. Booth, seeing an opening, launched himself towards the golden wolf-dog and bowled him over. They were a mess of legs and snapping jaws, falling head over tail together.

"Aren't you going to stop them?" Sam inquired. I laughed.

"Hell no. Booth'll end it quickly."

Only moments after I said that did the dust settle to show Marcus on his back and Booth's smaller jaws around his neck. Booth, although technically a blue heeler, was not much smaller than his wolf-dog competitor and far more muscled. Marcus would have a lot more work to do if he wanted to beat Booth anytime soon. All of us needed to keep working – including me.

Booth hopped off the younger skinwalker and padded over to me, a small chunk of golden fur clasped between his jaws. He shifted back with a wide smile on his face. Marcus hopped up beside him, resting his elbow on the larger man's shoulder, earning a frown from Booth. "What's up?" Marcus asked cheerfully.

"Lunch'll be ready soon. Came to tell you to wrap things up."

"Pretty sure I just did," remarked Booth, glaring lazily at his younger companion, who just smirked back.

Marcus turned back to face me and straightened, crossing his arms over his chest. "Are these your hunter buddies?" I questioned, eyes scanning the boys up and down. His green eyes flickered to Dean and looked the scruffier man up and down, licking his lips.

"Marcus, don't do that," I said, glowering playfully.

"Didn't realize this one was yours," he threw his hands up in defense.

I scoffed, my cheeks reddening. Fuck, why did he always have to push his luck? "Dean's not my boyfriend." I crossed my own arms over my chest and raised an eyebrow at the blonde.

"So you're saying he's up for grabs?" he asked, shamelessly checking Dean out. The eldest Winchester was clearly unsure of what to do, his own cheeks dusted with red. Sam, on the other hand, was struggling to hold back laughter.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "Let me remind you, Marcus, that you do have a boyfriend. I don't think Caeden would appreciate you making eyes at another man." At this Sam snorted and Dean whipped his head to glare at his brother. Sam just shrugged in response.

"In all honesty, I don't think Caeden would turn down a three-"

"Alright, that's enough out of you," Booth growled, placing a hand on the back of Marcus's neck and guiding him forward. Booth looked at me with pursed lips and narrowed eyes. "We'll meet you back at the main house," he said, before pushing Marcus in front of him, the blonde whining as they went but not struggling.

As soon as they were out of sight, Sam burst out laughing and Dean stared at his brother, appalled. "Dude, you just got hit on by a dog!"

Dean grumbled at his brother, his cheeks pink. "Can we just go eat lunch now?"

"Careful Dean, I think Marcus wants you for lunch," I added playfully. He glared sourly at me before marching back through the woods towards the house.

—

We woke early the next morning to prepare for the next hunt. "I can toss your stuff in the trunk," Sam offered, taking my small duffle bag. I thanked him and turned to my pack members with arms extended, beckoning them in for a hug.

"I shouldn't be gone too long, hopefully. Maybe a week or two. While I'm gone, Booth is in charge." Marcus huffed playfully at this, shooting Booth a teasing smirk. Booth glared in response. "Booth, keep them active, I don't want them lazing around while I'm gone."

"Not a problem. Stay safe," he ordered with a mock salute. I smiled back at him and gave him an affectionate hug. I turned with a wave and walked towards the Winchesters' car, grinning excitedly. I clambered into the backseat and waved good-bye as we took off down the road.

After a long day of driving, I couldn't wait to throw myself onto an uncomfortable motel bed. Just the thought of finally having enough space made me forget the discomfort for a brief moment in time. Perhaps if I had been allowed to shift I wouldn't be so cranky, but Dean's 'no fur' policy had to be followed if I wanted to continue working with the Winchesters. Sitting in the back seat, buckled in and unable to stretch out was a nightmare when I was so used to traveling my foot.

I stretched on the bed as soon as I dropped down, haphazardly tossing my bags on the floor. I arched my back and yawned, popping my tender back. My stomach growled as my eyelids dropped. "So what the hell are we supposed to be investigating in Minnesota?" I slurred sleepily.

Said Winchester glanced sideways at me, lips pursed and clearly unamused. "I thought we went over that during the drive," he grumbled with a single raised, unimpressed brow.

"So sorry, I was busy trying not to shred your upholstery," I rolled onto my stomach and glared at him, resting my chin on the back of my hands that laid flat against the bed. "You should be thanking me."

He scoffed. "If you did that, I would have shot you. No one touches Baby."

"Aww, you're a mechanophiliac. I bet she likes it in the tailpipe, huh?" He scoffed again and nearly choked on his beer. "When's Sam coming back with the food?" I whined.

"Soon, I hope, if it'll make your whiny ass shut up."

I huffed and sat up. "Explain to me again why we're here," I said. He glared my way and I flashed him a cheesy smile.

He turned back to his laptop before answering. "Long string of disappearances here, dating back... well, the list seems to be never-ending." He gestured frustratedly towards his computer screen and leaned back in his chair. "Last guy to disappear was a guy by the name of Alvin Jenkins," he said the man's name in an almost mocking tone. "Some kid was the last one to see him in a parking lot next to the kid's house."

"What'd the kid see?"

"That's what we're going to find out-" he lifted a finger into the air pointedly, "- after lunch."

—

The boy wasn't much help. All he had seen was Jenkins stumbling drunkenly towards his car, and the next he was gone with a loud crash. Kid couldn't even give a decent description of Jenkins' car, and now that was missing too.

I was never a fan of bars - too many smells, too many gross old men, and way too many people. But, bars seemed to be one of the boys' favorite hangouts, and at this point, I wasn't going to turn down a beer. It had been a long day, full of irritation, and I really didn't mind the burning sensation of alcohol slipping down my throat anymore.

"Police have not ruled out foul play," Sam stated, reading over a police report. I took another swig of my beer, watching Dean throw darts haphazardly at a board. "Apparently there were signs of a struggle." He looked up at his brother and Dean turned back to him with a shrug.

"You know they could be right, could just be a kidnapping," he said, gesturing to the police report as he referenced the investigators.

I chuckled. "Better hope it's not, or we'd have spent all that gas money getting here for nothing."

"Still one monster here we could hunt, Scooby," Dean teased. "And you bet your ass you're pitching in on the gas money." I snorted in response and he tossed another dart. "Maybe this isn't our kind of gig, Sammy," he continued.

"Yeah, maybe not," replied Sam, sounding disgruntled, "Except for this," he continued, pointing at a notebook. I knew it to be their father's old journal, though I had only seen it on a few occasions. I leaned against Sam's shoulder and read the page. "Dad marked the area, Dean. Possible hunting grounds and a phantom attacker."

I lifted an eyebrow and leaned further around Sam to read more. Dean joined me by Sam's other shoulder, staring quizzically at the page.

"Why would he even do that?" Dean questioned, snatching his beer off the table. Sam shook his head in response.

"Well, he found a lot of local folklore about a 'dark figure' that comes out at night and grabs people, then vanishes."

I raised my eyebrow at this. "And we're only finding out about this now?"

Sam swiveled in his chair to scowl at me. "I'm only just finding out about this now, too. I've actually been doing research while you two have been playing darts." I growled and he turned sharply back to Dean. "He found this too: this county has more missing persons per capita than anywhere else in the state."

Dean glanced between the journal and his younger brother. He took a deep breath, shook his head a little, and said, "That is pretty weird." He stopped on his way back to the dartboard and turned back to Sam. "Don't phantom attackers usually snatch people from their beds? Jenkins was taken from the parking lot."

"There's a lot of phantom attacker types, Dean," I countered. "Skinwalkers in Navajo legend were thought to be evil witches that snatched people by possessing or turning into animals first. Do I look like a phantom attacker to you?" I asked.

Dean glanced suspiciously my way. "I haven't decided yet. Do you have a habit of kidnapping people?"

"Only the ones I really like," I smirked at him. He raised a beer in a mock salute.

"She's right Dean. Spring-heeled Jack, Phantom Gassers. They take people anywhere, any time," he added. He smiled at him for backing me up. "Look, Dean, I don't know if this is our kind of gig or not, but it’s worth sticking around a little longer."

"Yeah you're right," Dean cut him off. "We'll ask around more tomorrow." Sam agreed and Dean went back to his game. I took another swig of my beer, pondering whether I should join him or not.

"Right. I say we head back to the motel-"

"Woah, woah, easy there. Let's have another round," Dean countered, gesturing towards the table. I stretched and shook my head. I didn't particularly want another round – I wasn't looking to get plastered tonight.

Sam chuckled and closed his father's journal. "We should get an early start tomorrow."

"You really know how to have fun, don't you grandma," his brother teased.

"You know, Dean, not sure about you, but to me, watching you throw darts and Sam turn pages in a book for another hour really doesn't sound fun to me." He turned to me, looking shocked that I wasn't taking his side. I shrugged.

The elder brother glanced between the two of us, mock disgust on his features. "All right," he said, throwing one last dart. "I'll meet you outside, gotta take a leak," he grabbed his coat and made his way towards the bathroom.

"Me too, Sammy," I added, grabbing my own leather jacket. Sam chuckled.

"You just want that worker’s number, don't you?"

"What do you take me for Samuel, a heathen?" I feigned hurt at his words and he just chuckled and shook his head.

"I'll meet you two in the car," he said with a laugh

"Course Sam," I answered as I made my way towards the bathroom. I caught said worker’s eye on my way out and winked.

As I made my way to the door Dean caught up with me, a dumbfounded expression on his face. "What the hell was that?" he asked, sounding out of breath.

"It's called flirting, Dean. I hope you learned a thing or two from that." I grinned as he spluttered and tripped over his words. I glanced at him with a devious look in my eyes. "I'm sorry, Dean, were you looking to get laid tonight? It's not too late you know, I'm sure one of those burly bikers wouldn't mind bending you over their bed tonight."

His jaw dropped and I cackled. It had been a long time since I had teased someone like this, since before my uncle had left for his final hunt. It was a refreshing feeling, being able to leave someone speechless.

We exited the bar into the cool, crisp night air, Dean holding the door open for me. I nodded to him and he flashed a wide smirk as a puff of cold air left my lips. I breathed out again and rubbed my already cold hands together.

"It's almost spring, why is it so damn cold," I whined, following after the hunter. He chuckled lightly in response. He slowed his pace, glimpsing an orange tabby cat sitting on the hood of a car. My lips curled in disgust, and the cat hissed. I turned back to Dean, his own back to me rather than in the car. I raised an eyebrow and moved to stand beside him.

In his hands, he held his father's journal. I glanced between him and the book, not understanding the significance. It hit me as he walked quickly around the Impala, checking all the windows for any sign of Sam.

"Shit," I whispered, my breath fogging once more as it hit the cool night air. Not even moments later, he was racing towards the bar entrance, talking hurriedly to some bikers. They shook their heads and he whirled around, racing through the parking lot, and called Sam's name.

I walked slowly around the car, searching for any hints of his scent, any idea as to where he might have disappeared to. "Dean!" I called. The man turned frantically. I shook my head. "Freshest scent is right here, where I'm standing." His eyes seemed glazed as he processed the information before once again dashing madly around the small parking lot. Finally, he stopped, his eyes locking on something above him. My gaze followed his and landed on an old camera. I walked gingerly towards him as he stood in the center of the road, staring down the road as if hoping to see Sam.

—

The drive back to the motel was eerily silent. I didn't know what to say, and I couldn't help but feel guilty. I should’ve just left with Sam. I pulled my knees to my chest, careful to keep my shoes off the leather seat. At least I could do that much for Dean.

I kept mulling it over in my head, thinking of all the possible scenarios. Could I have fought the monster and ended our case early? Could I have saved Sam? What if we had both been taken, then what would Dean do? I resisted the urge to sigh, not wanting to bother Dean, even with the small things. I could practically feel the stress radiating off of him – his white-knuckled grip on the steering wheel and his jerky movements were tell-tale signs of his frustration and anxiety.

I wondered if similar thoughts were going through his head.

I shifted uncomfortably in my seat, a seat that felt like it didn't belong to me. I had never been in the passenger seat of the Impala, and to be here now, and in this circumstance, felt like I was practically spitting on Sam's grave.

I hated it. I hated the feeling of guilt. I always had.

I don't think I had felt this guilty or this upset since my uncle’s death. Even then there was nothing I could do, I knew that, but it still felt like I should have done something. If I had convinced him to wait two more hours to leave the house, would he still be alive? Or would another innocent person be dead at the hands of a wraith?

I hated that wraith. I hated the thing that killed my uncle with a passion -- and now I was beginning to hate the thing that took Sam. Maybe one day I would sink my fangs into that wraith's throat, but for now, I wanted to sink them into whatever took him.

My blood was boiling so much that I hadn't even realized we parked at the motel. I eyed Dean, who had his forehead pressed against the wheel, eyes closed. The sight practically drew a whine from deep in my chest. It was a gut-wrenching feeling, knowing that I had no clue how to help him. The cogs turned in mind – what could possibly comfort him?

It hit me just how little I knew about Dean. The snarky remarks, the teasing back and forth was all just... a way to hide how little we knew about each other. Was he a physical person, in need of touch when he was upset? Did he prefer to be left alone? He was a friend, even family at this point, but he had become so all too quickly. Hell, I didn't even know about his parents until nearly two months ago. I sighed, ran a calloused hand through my hair and leaned my head back against my- Sam's seat- baring my throat at the night sky.

"We should go inside, Dean."

The hunter didn't move or show any indication that he had heard me. I sat up slowly and scanned him with sad eyes. Tentatively, I reached my hand out and placed it gently onto his back, between his shoulder blades, thoroughly questioning if it was the right move. He jumped but slowly relaxed into the touch. After a few moments that to me felt almost like years, he lifted his head and gazed at me with dewy green eyes.

To say I was shocked was an understatement. Dean did not seem like the type to cry – although this wasn't truly crying. I scrunched my brows, not sure what to say. Our stare-down lasted for what felt like an eternity.

I had never noticed before, but his eyes were flecked with gold. They were almost a candy apple green in the bright afternoon sunlight, I knew that. But at night, the reflection of the stars in his eyes brought out the flecks of gold, like bits of caramel lost in a sea of green.

I hadn't realized how long I was staring until he turned his head sharply away from me, a light blush dusting his cheeks. Upon my realization, a brilliant, scarlet red bloomed across my own cheeks. I averted my gaze back to my hands, now clasped in my lap.

The hunter sniffed before rubbing a hand hastily across his face and reaching for the door handle. Without a word, he exited his beloved car and headed towards the door to our motel room. I followed quickly, hot on his heels and my feet barely making any noise against the paved ground, almost like a ghost.

As soon as we made it inside he threw himself onto his bed, not even bothering to toss his keys onto the small desk by the door or to take his shoes off. He fell face first, with no inhibitions. I sighed once again before I could stop myself and gently sat down beside him on the bed. He made no effort to move as the bed dipped beside him.

"Dean?" I cooed quietly, in what I hoped was a comforting voice. He only hummed in response. "Are you alright?" Stupid question. I flinched as soon as the words left my mouth. He turned his head to look at me, a steady glare on his handsome features. "Sorry."

I dropped backward from my sitting position to have my back flat against the bed. I curled onto my side and gazed down the length of the bed at Dean, his head roughly even with my mid-torso. He glanced towards me, a severe pout on his lips.

"It's not your fault, Dean," I whispered, echoing the same words I had been telling myself and struggling to believe. He snapped his face towards me, his stern glare present once more.

"Course it's my fault," he rasped, his voice hoarse as though he really had been crying. Perhaps what I had seen from him earlier really was his version of tears.

"If it is, then it's as much my fault. We both left him alone, knowing full well there was danger." Was that really true? How could we have known Sam would be snatched up? I scowled and turned away from him, mulling over my next words.Dean frowned at this and averted his gaze, refusing to accept what he knew was the truth – he couldn't have known.

"It's my job to look out for him," he mumbled against the scratchy comforter.

"It's not your job to protect him, Dean." The ever-present glare was back and he rolled onto his back, successfully shifting up the bed until he was eye level with me. He glared ferociously at the ceiling, so ferociously in fact that I'm sure if he could he would have set it on fire. I nibbled on my bottom lip, questioning what he needed to hear. It had been so long since I'd comforted someone, and I knew it was showing. "We're going to find him, Dean. And I assure you that if we don't, I'll go to hell and back and bring him back to you myself."

His eyes locked with mine once more, his green orbs swimming with unshed tears. Without thinking, I reached forward and brushed any escapees from beneath his eyes. I retracted my hand almost immediately upon realizing what I had done. I whispered a quiet apology, to which he only hummed in response.

"We're going to get him back. I'm not going to let anything hurt you boys, not now, not ever," I whispered quietly, still laying on my side, facing him. He turned his head and once more his green eyes fell upon mine. I hoped my own conveyed as much emotion as I felt.

I had never been good at comforting people. I had never really been taught to. For the longest time I hadn't needed to interact with anyone but my family. It wasn't until I was finally allowed to attend high school that I had been allowed to socialize with others of my age, and even then I was a loner. My parents had feared that I didn't have the control over my hunger that they had.

They weren't entirely wrong.

After my mother died and my father left, I was finally introduced to compassion. I wasn't well-versed or even particularly willing, but my uncle took his time with me.

Some of my fondest memories of him always involved his hugs. Despite his rough hunter demeanor, he was always cuddly and friendly, something my mother – his sister – had lacked. He offered a hug for every occasion, something I had been wary of at first. I wasn't used to hugs. That isn't to say that my parents didn't love me, I know they did – their love was just more... protective. Caging. But his love was the kind of love I really needed at that time.

Before I could even think to stop myself I was throwing myself onto Dean in some odd cross between a hug and a tackle. He let out an oof as I landed on him, his lungs deflating from the sudden impact.

"I wasn't expecting that," he muttered, a small smirk rising on his lips.

"Neither was I," I muttered back. He chuckled and, to my surprise, wrapped his own toned arms around my waist.

I'm not sure when, but at some point in our momentary silence, Dean had begun to play with the ends of my hair. If it had been anyone else at any other time I would have asked them to stop, but he seemed to visibly relax beneath me, something I was very pleased with given our current stressful situation.

"You really think we'll find him?" he whispered, worry evident in his voice. I lifted my head to search his face, my hair dropping from between his fingers.

"What? What happened to your confidence, Dean?" I questioned back. "You're always so sure of yourself."

"Because of Sam," he countered. "I feel like I have to be, to keep him safe and unconcerned." He frowned a bit before continuing. "Sam and my dad are my only reasons for anything. Without them, I-" he choked up and dropped his gaze. I searched his eyes the best I could, watching them swim with emotion.

"We'll find him," I whispered. "We'll find both of them." His eyes snapped to mine and once again I did my best to convey how I felt through a mere gaze. "We'll find Sam, and we'll kill the son of a bitch that took him. Then, we'll find your dad, and I'll smack him for making you worry so much."

Dean nodded and swallowed dryly, struggling to find the words he wanted to say - there were just so many. Finally, he managed to choke out a tired 'OK'.

It was only then, when I felt his hot breath fan my face, that I realized just how close we were. In an attempt to hide my sudden embarrassed blush I dropped my head into the crook of his neck and tightened my grip on him. To my surprise, he hummed in satisfaction.

Neither of us was well-versed in expressing our emotions through words. Body language was all we had, and I suddenly realized that perhaps that was why he made a habit of finding partners in run-down bars and beating walls until his knuckles were bloody. He – much like my old self – had few physical outlets for his emotions.

I was lucky I had my pack now. I knew I could rely on them and trust them to help me through anything. It was at that moment that I resolved to be that for Dean – I understood him without him needing to say anything because I had once felt the same way.

We stayed like that the rest of the night. When we rose in the early morning, we were a tangled heap of limbs and clothes, clutching to each other like the other was our lifeline.

I'm not ashamed to admit it was the best night's sleep I'd had in years.

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michelleelizabethtanner · 1 year ago

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Random GG question for you!! If season 3 hadn’t been cut short, what do you think the ending would have been? I know they basically just continued with the storyline in S4, but I still can’t help but feel cheated of those 5 eps!

Feels like they could have wrapped up hitman, maybe SS, then maybe Rio gets arrested at end of S3? But would they have done the whole Rio get arrested fakeout for a finale when they already did it S1??

UGH just feels like if they were able to wrap up more of those storylines in S3, we could have had more interesting Beth/Rio/nick content across S4. BUT probably wishful thinking lol

Anyways, would love to hear your thoughts!

Anon! Hi! Idk what the standard turnaround is on asks here to be considered peak etiquette. I’m on vacation from work this week so naturally I’ve been ridiculously busy. 😂😂 But I’ve been thinking about this question.

I do think s3 had some whiplash moments. Like this one. Where it didn’t make much sense for why exactly Rio was behaving the way he was. But I do think that the general gist of 4.04 would have been how s3 wrapped. It had the shooting of someone (Fitz), which is how every season appears to have been planned to wrap up. And there seems to be a pretty clear delineation between Rio’s emotions pre and post Fitz execution that I think fit a little better into a natural progression leading to forgiveness.

I’ll be honest, it does hurt my brain sometimes to try and think of why the story did what it did. I don’t hate the hitman plot. I think it’s a really good way to illustrate Beth’s inner conflict. It does ask the viewer to constantly read between the lines, and the moments of emotional honesty (even when she’s being dishonest) are lost in the peripheral nonsense. That’s actually the problem with this show, now that I’m rambling about it. The peripheral nonsense. The general trajectory of how Beth grows into herself, how Rio comes to terms with his weakness, how Brio decide to slowly choose each other… That’s all fine. It could have used a little more blatant telling. A little more consistency. But ultimately… okay. But the peripheral nonsense, the time waste, the hours focused on things no one cared about and that which ultimately didn’t progress the story – all that is what bogged it down and made it feel so unsatisfying. S4, after 4.08, is basically useless filler. Too slow and too uninteresting in how it moved the primary story.

And listen, I also wanna add that it isn’t just the Brio investment that makes me say this. I’m all for quality meaningful character development for everyone. But how exactly does trash boyfriend progress Annie? If anything, he illustrates how stagnant she is in her awful life choices. How does bike gang progress Dean? Again, it just highlights the same ol’ character flaws he had from the start. I did very much enjoy the way Stan became much more honest in his resentment of Beth. I always viewed him as not loving the Bolands, and especially not Beth. So his and Ruby’s arc, to me, was pretty well paced and one of the few interesting peripheral storylines in the show. But overall, so much of the magic of seasons 1 and 2 got lost in the subsequent seasons because the peripheral writing became too rambly and lacking direction. Kinda like this post hahahaha!!

What would you have liked to have seen as a season 3 finale?

#good girls season 3 #finale #good girls nbc #asks

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limetameta · 11 months ago

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when i saw that why women kill was a story made by the same person who made desperate housewives i was like, huh, let me see where this goes. and i was delighted at moments, horrified at some, and otherwise entertained.

did not feel like desperate housewives to me. felt like something trying to be more. than that show. which fair enough look at all of these years and decades which have passed.

the closest timeline that felt like desperate housewives and the one i was most invested in was beth ann's timeline in the 60s. the 80s timeline felt like some cheap gabrielle solis marries a gay guy 80s fic i was reading and they were very cute together, but i did not find that end any less offensive than if they had outright had aids kill him. wow, 80s, wow, gay guys, wow it's better to have your wife mercy kill you than to throw you out. it was not a story that fit with the narrative of the 2019 and 60s timelines. karl was a good character, but ultimately i can't help but think that his end felt forced and that STILL in media gay men's deaths and existence is used as a pitying tool. rubbed me the wrong way, and you can camouflage it with so many snappy comebacks and edie britt like charm all you want, i didn't have a fun time with this one.

going into s2 of why women kill was interesting for me because the first thing i noticed when i went into the why women kill tag on tumblr was a lot of people's disappointment with it. that it didn't keep with the 3 timeline frame, that it didn't feel true to the show. which, if you were expecting the continuation of those 3 timelines, if you wanted the same character mold with different names and colours - yes, then that's way too different.

but if you want to watch why women kill - then this falls right in with its purview. we follow alma and we focus on her now because we actually get growth and the descent, and all of the consequences of her actions. you don't have your focus split from her by following two more timelines - or whatever it was they tried to do with the 2019 timeline. good idea, but man it was really boring. just like eva needed more proactivity in eli's script, so, too, did the 2019 characters. they're more reactionary. you can even see it in that sequence where all three timelines meld - taylor is on the reactionary side, she's not the one surging forward and doing things, she's defending and reacting to the situation at hand.

but, back to me praising why women kill s2. and i say this with full honesty: i am heavily being influenced by my love of desperate housewives when i say that this s2 felt more true to DH than s1. I love Alma. Truly feels like one of the characters in Wisteria Lane come to life. Whether this is a good thing for the show itself or not, at least she's entertaining to follow along. At least there's a clear arc. Just like with Beth Ann. That's why I call these the two strongest characters of the series so far.

anyway, these are my thoughts. i don't expect anyone else to agree nor disagree.

season 2? banging. i love it. all of these characters are so awful they're the best.

hoping s3 will be completely different from s1 and s2 and that they'll keep it going, keeping us all on our toes. i would hate for them to come back to the 3 timeline plot device just because it worked in s1, unless they have a story they want to tell in such a device - but just because people are complaining about s2 would be sad.

#why women kill #i havent yet finished s2 i have like 2 eps left but my god i'm having so much fun watching this show

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kiwibirdlafayette · 2 years ago

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im bored at work and feel like rambling about some mianite verse c!Tom headcanons. so backstory headcanon time

cw for zombie related things and (temporary) character death. under a cut just to be safe

I like to imagine because its implied that the Minecraft Project precedes Mianite S1 (NOT Isles that shit chronologically takes place after S2 when him and Jordan travel back in time to that era i refuse to believe anything else), that Tom starts in that realm/universe. We''ll dub it for the time being Astrakheins (iykyk) as a human. Unzombified.

I don't really know much about TMP in terms if theres a canon storyline but in this HC at least the Syndicate family has a long history of running the industry in this era and in time, the mantle falls to Thomas and his sister Alice. Under their command, the world flourishes into a prosperous empire of farming, mining and resources. In addition, a strong bond is formed with a goddess by the name of Ianite and her the Voidwalkers of the End and the mysterious beings of the nether.

However, as things go. Things go.

Within a couple years of being in charge, Tom falls ill with a mysterious infection that starts to... turn him. While he maintains a healthy physical state, he notices the skin on his hands rotting at the seams of former injuries, his hair changing from its usual brown blonde to a sickly cerulean. Alice and the others come to him with concerns, but the zombification is nothing to him. He goes on as normal, and is quite productive to say the least.

However, it isn't until after the ender dragon fight where something changes, where the illness begins to take over him in a way that renders him bedridden for weeks. Ianite herself has no idea where it could have come from, instead citing a possible origin from the Nether, which in the absence of any god has been slowly deteriorating. And to her knowledge, there is no way of fighting it. He tries to move, but eventually becomes completely immobile despite multiple limb surgeries.

And one day, his eyes closed and would not open again.

Heartbroken, Alice had no choice but to bury him, and continue on. The empire could not fall this easily. Little did she know, as she laid her brother to rest in the ground, something, not of this world watched on. Sitting. Waiting.

And finally it struck.

In the middle of a business meeting with redstone engineers from the End, a multiversal rift tears a gaping chasm through the sky, the edges burning with a blaze unlike anything the citizens had ever seen before. From it jumped a demon, a dragon, a god with furiously glowing golden eyes and a cloak covered in hot ash, his gaze set on one thing only.

The grave of Tom Syndicate.

Using the power he must have possessed he raises a wall of obsidian, magma and blackstone so high that no one can get to him, regardless of how powerful- including Alice. She frantically reaches into her pockets and calls to Ianite.

No answer.

Within he chants a language not ever having been spoken in Astrakheins before, breaking the ground at his feet to rise pools of lava lifting the body of the zombified man before him, opening his fully black eyes and red pupils to face the god.

Tom himself didn't quite know where he was, in all honesty.

He recognizes some things, some builds, some faces. His memory is foggy. He retains some names, the skills in which it would take to survive, but he hadn't come back right. He hadn't come back the same.

None of what he does remember is alluring enough to insist on staying when the god before him, introducing himself as Dianite, offers to take Tom to this realm of anarchy to serve as his champion.

Champion. How could he resist such a title? Especially after this guy seems to have brought him back from a limbo he was stuck in.

The conversation is not heard by others. But it must have been rather promising to have a deal struck in such a short time.

The walls around him and his god crumble to the ground. The earth closes up and the lava returns to its underground tomb. Dianite raises his blade to the sky in victory, and flies up, Tom trailing closely after. He goes almost without second thought back through the rift, sealing it shut behind him almost as quickly as it had opened.

And that's the last Alice and Astrakheins ever sees of Tom "SynHD" Syndicate.

For now.

#mianite #tom syndicate #mianite headcanon #lafakiwi writes #cw zombie #tw character death #tw fictional illness #the alice lore ill add on later i cant let yall know who the Nowhere is yet :]c #anyway yeah enjoy this #i mostly needed to write it out for a Specific Other Thing #before I forgot what i had written the next time i do lore on it #but yeah. anyway excuses for post-revival capsize having tom knowing that kinda feeling. of not really recalling all of their past lives #the zombificiation beam that hit tom is a little abstract in nature but just hear me out #gkm writer arc

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shrinkthisviolet · 8 months ago

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1, 5, 8, & 15

1. Have you pulled inspiration from media sources other than the property your fic is related to (a plot point from a TV show that has nothing to do with the characters/setting of the fic, a line from a book, etc.)? If so, for which story? Why did you find that media source compelling?

When it comes to general trends, I tend to pull from Star Wars and Ace Attorney (mostly the themes for the latter, not so much storylines). Mostly because that’s just the media that sticks with me the most. Even from LOTR sometimes, although it’s been a while since I’ve seen those movies. In terms of specifics:

To write Morgan & Jesse, I pull from Parent Trap, specifically Hallie and Annie’s dynamic! Which is hardly a secret, given that the two sets of twins share a birthday 😅 granted, Morgan & Jesse DO get along at first until the Zoom thing happens, but…honestly, I think they’d rub each other the wrong way regardless. Meeting your doppelgänger from another Earth doesn’t come without ~some~ insecurity…

To write Barry & Morgan, I draw…well aside from my own experiences (with my dad mostly, as I am the oldest sibling), I draw from other brother-sister relationships that I love! Especially from Justin & Alex in WOWP (the movies specifically—I know in the show they tend to have a bunch of ups and downs, and Barry & Morgan are a bit more steady aside from their rough patch in s1…and in s3). Also, as weird as it sounds, from Zuko & Izumi a little bit too 😅 at least regarding the protectiveness aspect, not so much the father-daughter aspect (Barry isn't Morgan's dad, he's her older brother, even if those two positions sometimes overlap in some situations...even if Barry at times feels like he's doing things for Morgan as her brother that Eowells ought to have done as her father).

Also, I haven’t written s3 yet, but I’m gonna draw quite a bit from Star Wars 👀 not gonna say how or why, because that’ll give too much away, but you’ll know it when you read it.

For Lucy & Astra, I pull from female friendships I've seen in multiple places...Astra even has a little Mara Jade in her with her quick wit and sarcasm.

(Also ofc for some storylines in my Morgan AU, I’m pulling from the comics, but like. Ofc I am, that’s the source material even beyond the show, and as we get more and more divergent, it's a nice way to validate myself and the changes I'll be making 😅 because some of them are gonna be major)

5. Is there a tiny detail in one of your fics that you feel goes tragically unnoticed?

I’ve answered here, but here’s another:

In Chapter 10 of i still love you (i promise), I incorporated that bit about how when Eowells takes off his glasses, he's speaking with complete honesty, or something close to it (a Tom Cavanagh quote if I'm not mistaken):

“Yes, well…when I was growing up, that is what I was taught.” He sighed, taking off his glasses to rub his eyes. “Sometimes I wonder how much of what I was taught is really true. But…I suppose I can’t help it. Right or wrong…I can’t bring myself to regret anything I do for you.” He lifted his steely gaze to meet hers, and…maybe it was her imagination, but he seemed to be challenging her. It was almost…almost as though he knew— No. He couldn’t. He hadn’t come to see Ronnie and Stein off—there was no way he knew— “Anyway,” he interrupted, “I’ve taken too much of your time, I fear. Remind me when your acceptances are coming in?”

He's speaking with an intense honesty here, essentially saying he doesn't regret what he did (people caught that latter part, but him taking off the glasses is me accentuating that “hey, he really, really means it”)...and also hinting that he knows about something else. Something that Morgan clocks but tries to deny (and continues to deny, otherwise she would've brought it up to Barry and Iris at the end). Hmm but what could that possibly be?

8. Is there a story idea you have that you would love if it could appear fully realized but that you do not think you’ll ever write yourself?

So I’ve read that Iris was apparently supposed to be a criminal psychologist in the original pilot of the Flash? And now I need a fic of that so badly (preferably with Westallen endgame, but Westhawne would be sweet too). Whether she ends up a reporter by the end or not, doesn’t matter—I just wanna see Iris using a loophole (“you said I couldn’t be a cop, you never said I couldn’t be a criminal psychologist”) to work in the CCPD, and her and Barry teaming up for cases.

Could even be a great way to show how she and Barry approach things differently — have them on the same case, and Barry is very logical/clinical while Iris is more empathetic/big-picture.

Ooh and Iris figuring out Barry’s secret because “Barry. What kind of idiot do you take me for. I work right alongside you, we’ve worked cases together—do you honestly think I wouldn’t notice when your habits changed, when you ducked out of work, when you ducked out of meetings with me?”

AND and Iris figuring out Eowells’s secret that way too, because she knows how criminals think and Eowells is fitting that profile very well as time goes on. Barry won’t hear of it. They argue, day in and day out—that’s what their tension throughout the season is about, not Barry and Joe lying to Iris.

Iris & Joe teaming up to investigate Eowells too 👀 as Joe has come to see Iris as a professional equal much earlier and now treats her as such

Like!! The potential!! I don’t know enough about criminal psychology to write this (and I don’t have the brainspace to devote to researching it fully) but I’d be so down to read a fic like this.

15. Is there any genre, trope, or style that you find particularly challenging to write? Do you enjoy the challenge or prefer to avoid it?

Misunderstandings, simply because of how much I usually dislike the trope 😅 it can be useful if done properly…but it’s not always done properly. Sometimes it’s a very basic misunderstanding that has no reason to stretch on for as long as it does, because it would really take one conversation that only plot contrivance is preventing.

To some degree, I felt like I was falling a little into that trap by the end of i still love you (i promise) and that was a challenge (a welcome one, though) 😅 to most, Barry probably appears very stupid, much like the version of the trope I despise. Which is fair! But hopefully when I finish his POV fic, it’ll become a little more clear what he’s thinking. In any case, it’s definitely a learning experience for me as a writer, and that’s always a welcome thing.

fanfic ask game!

#the cut in the middle is just to keep the post from running too long #but all the asked numbers are answered!#fanfic ask game

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rafs13 · 3 years ago

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Can Bleach Shippers all agree that Kubo ‘’baited’’ us regarding the romance in Bleach!?

Yes, I know Bleach is a Shonen Manga and isn’t focused on romance, but Kubo did decide to have Ichigo end with Orihime and Rukia with Renji.

That’s canon despite how I and others feel about it.

With the comeback of Bleach’s Anime, the shipping wars between Ichiruki and Ichihime have ‘’resurrected’’ and this has caused speculation on what is the better ship, and what Kubo intentionally wanted. In all honesty, we don’t know what was originally planned regarding the romance in Bleach, we aren’t Kubo, we are not 100 percent sure of what he thought while writing the story. Authors change their stories millions of times, this happens with Mangaka’s since they have to write chapters weekly so they don’t get time to flesh out ideas at times.

Based on the Manga (Source material) no matter what you shipped Kubo did cater to both Ichiruki and Ichihime in various ways. Shippers are not wrong for shipping Ichiruki and Ichihime. I used to think how could anyone ship Ichihime when it was so one-sided, I even wrote posts on it in the past. Based on the manga and story, Ichiruki had more depth to it, no matter if you are a shipper or not. But looking back on how everything panned out I can see how Ichihime shippers got invested into this ship.

With Ichihime Kubo focused a lot on Orihime’s crush on Ichigo. A lot of the romance of Ichihime came from Orihime’s view/standpoint. She is the one who says she would love him in 5 different lifetimes, Orihime chose to spend her last night next to Ichigo before being taken to Hueco Mundo by Ulquiorra, and she wanted Ichigo to save her from Hueco Mundo (she initially went there with no resistance because of this). I can see why shippers would run to ship this because in canon Orihime likes Ichigo, it’s been said and showcased in the Manga/Anime with all these moments. Fans of her character can see why it’s important to her so of course they would want her with Ichigo. But that’s where the material ends. Kubo only gives anything that pushes for Ichihime from Orihime’s standpoint and not Ichigo’s.

It’s only after the manga ends that he tries to make the connection from Ichigo’s standpoint in the light novels. Why not in the manga?

Plus, I can surely say for a fact that Orihime was challenged as a character whenever she was around Ulquiorra and Uryu. And those characters were also teased too to be with Orihime at some point and it was very subtle. They had some small romantic moments with her and it worked well with the narrative of the storyline.

I always questioned why Kubo would make Orihime have a crush on Ichigo but then include multiple moments of romance between Ichigo/Rukia?

Why did Kubo have Orihime love Ichigo? What did he plan to do with the romance and how would it add to the plot of the story? Was it to add to her character arc? Because aside from Hueco Mundo and her mini-arc with grieving over her brother Sora, and unlocking her fullbring powers to protect Tatsuki in s1, she didn’t get much attention or story. I know she got some moments outside of these areas but they weren’t vital. Her love for Ichigo only revolves around her really, he’s not that involved if we think about it. Most Anime fans who know of Bleach only know Orihime for screaming ‘‘Kurosaki-Kun’‘ while Ichigo is seen as his character/person outside Orihime.

In comparison, let us look at another shonen anime like MHA.

Yes, we know Uraraka loves Izuku and it’s been shown to be stronger on her end than his. While he does love her it’s taking him more time to know he is in love, since he’s so focused on becoming the best hero. But he has shown many actions of love/affection towards Uraraka in the anime/manga. However, the difference is Uraraka has her character and continuing storyline, her love for Izuku pushes the narrative of how heroic Izuku is. He inspired her to be a better hero and to be more confident and serious about getting better.

That works for the story and Uraraka’s character.

With Bleach, Orihime’s love for Ichigo ends with her. This is because Kubo didn’t make it convincing enough with the material in the manga. He gave Ichihime fans some ground to work with, but also kept pushing the narrative of Ichiruki in the meantime. For me, Ichihime falls flat because there is not enough material or push on Ichigo’s end throughout the whole manga to support that he loved Orihime. No confession in the Manga/Anime while it was running (or at its height during the 2000s), no artwork or spreads of the two (ALONE) to showcase romance/affection from Ichigo’s perspective, and nothing from Kubo either if we want to keep it real. He never talked about Ichihime being the endgame couple or hinted at it, and I surely remember him saying Ichigo and Rukia were more than friends less than lovers.

Why was he so happy to talk about the relationship between Ichigo x Rukia, when he could have shut down the speculation of them being together?

At this point I don’t have to write why I and any other shippers shipped Ichiruki...the manga is right there. We didn’t ship them to spite anyone, Ichiruki was pushed heavily at the start of the manga and many moments in-between after that.

Why make Rukia stop Ichigo’s rain and not Orihime? Why has Ichigo repaired the broken relationship with Rukia and Byakuya in the SS arc and not Renji? Why has Ichigo saved Rukia and not Renji? Why let Rukia say Ichigo’s the man in her heart?

Shouldn’t that be Renji? But it wasn't....

Another thing I want to talk about is Rukia being like a sister to Ichigo. Many fans say this or that she’s just a friend. Kubo said himself that she’s more than a friend in an interview so we can’t caller her that. So is she like a sister? What would be the need for that? Ichigo has two sisters already (Yuzu x Karin say hi!) and we see how he acts with them. He’s protective but secretive at times to protect them from knowing his identity as a soul reaper during the first few arcs. Ichigo pretends to be happy and okay when he’s really depressed inside when it comes to his sisters. He even showed this behaviour to Orihime, remember he was depressed about his mother’s death anniversary and he pretended to be happy around Orihime at school? But with Rukia he didn’t act that way, he straight up told her he was depressed and not okay because of his mom’s murder.

He’s transparent with Rukia.

It’s clear Rukia is above the role of a sister when it comes to how Ichigo views her. Remember Orihime was nervous about their relationship and even spoke to Rangiku about it.

Why would Kubo add that in if he was 100 percent gunning for Ichihime? Make it make sense because the math ain’t mathing.

Aside from this point, even with the new anime promo for Bleach Kubo is making official art with mostly only ‘’ichiruki’’ panels. He knows that people like them as a pair (the way many of his ichiruki japanese/international fans reacted to the ending by burning bleach volumes says it all) so he keeps on giving us content. I wondered why Ichigo and Orihime have not had any official art together or to promote them as a couple?

The same question I ask here for Renruki?

I just wanted to make this post because I feel like from both sides are being played when it comes to ships, I just wish I could speak to Kubo and get some clarity.

I do think it’s fact that Ichiruki felt more earned and believable than Ichihime based on the fact that BOTH sides showed romantic actions/cues towards each other in the manga. It didn’t seem one-sided and you can’t deny they have an unbreakable bond.

I will always be a Ichiruki fan but I just wish Kubo didn’t pander/tease various couples. It did more harm than good and now with Bleach coming back it’s going to be a ship war again.

#Bleach #shipping #ichiruki #ichihime #bleach discourse #ichigo kurosaki #rukia kuchiki #uryuu ishida #ulquiorra shiffer #orihime inoue #pro ichiruki #tite kubo #bleach ships #bleach anime #ishihime #ulquihime #mha #izuku x ochako

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wibble-wobbegong · 2 years ago

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mike literally saying that his parents and sister would be el's new parents and sister but "hE sAiD hE lOvEd HeR aT fIrSt SiGhT" bro what? he thought she'd be part of his family but also knew she was the only girl to show an interest in him so obviously she must be in love with him and he has to seize that like wtf

the miscommunication runs deeper than just byler

NO FOR REAL

el and mike have a fundamental difference in how they view love, but they assume the other person has the same viewpoint.

mike has a developed view on the different types of love in his life that he has a solid grasp on by s4 as seen by how he interacts with his family, friends, and will vs el. he knows how he feels and he knows he isn’t in love with el and wants to break up with her. he looks to will for encouragement over and over. i have my fully formed opinion on the monologue here, but i’d like to add that i think mike has only been pretending to continue to love el because of his personal philosophy. mike has three major viewpoints that play into his reasoning for staying with el.

1. “A promise is something you can never break.” mike made a promise to el in s1 to take her to the snowball, which has the implications of promising to be romantically involved with her.

2. “Friends are someone you’d do anything for.” and “Friends don’t lie.” I have to put these two together because they constantly conflict each other in their relationship. mike would do anything for el, even lie, because on some level they are friends and mike wants her to be happy. he thinks keeping his promise of dating her is making her happy, so he continues doing it against his own happiness. at the same time, mike is also willing to lie to el because he can’t be emotionally vulnerable with her and give her the truth, he thinks it’ll cause her to leave and he wants her to need him (hopper behavior). he cares about el a lot, but he doesn’t care enough to hurt her which sounds backwards but when mike really loves someone, he’s willing to be vulnerable even if the truth is harsh because he thinks those people deserve honesty. with el, he’s still prioritizing himself in a way because he’s playing into his own philosophy’s and self preservation. his view on their relationship comes back to his own feelings at the end of the day.

el has only just gotten to have a fully formed view on familial love by the end of s4 now that she’s lived as a normal girl with the byers, gotten her dad back, and almost finally let go of brenner. the only thing that’s conflicting her view is mike, who she holds the same type of love for that she holds for a father. she seems very ready to break up with him though, so even if she hasn’t realized exactly how she feels, she knows it isn’t romantic. honestly, i think she’s even aware that she doesn’t have any real connection to him beyond that ingrained familial connection that was established in s1 because of the monologue and the connection she feels with max. el realizes she can pick out happy moments with max where she felt genuinely understood and happy, but we get no flashbacks to that with mike because those moments don’t exist. her romantic relationship with mike relied completely on lies and physical affection which are not good foundations for romance at all.

el needs to get her footing on platonic and romantic love before actually being in a relationship. her dating mike before doing that made understanding all of the complexities of love a million times more difficult. she needs independence so she can develop her own perspective on the world, separate from mike and max (max was still influencing her concept of romance and friendship, though in a much more positive light than mike). the plot is currently set up so that she can lean on her family while doing so.

they have a completely different perspective on their relationship and neither is aware of that. they’re also both lying to each other. miscommunication runs at the very core of their relationship and doomed it to fail from the very start.

#sorry this got longer than I meant it to be lol #byler #anti mileven #asks

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loupettes · 3 years ago

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Hi! Here I am again, since I loved your insights on Doomsday. ;-)

So, let's continue talking about Ten's behaviour, this time in Rise of the Cybermen/Age of Steel.

In my opinion, Ten is rather distant and almost assholey towards Rose in this two-parter, especially when compared to Nine's incredible tenderness in Father's Day (and this despite the whole end-of-the-world + mutual-insults situation!). I totally understand what he says to her (that Parallel Pete is not her father, that her father died when she was 6 months old...) but... would it hurt you to also take her hand, hug her, say something about how you are sorry for what she must be feeling? So, I wonder[ed] why Ten behaves like this.

In this case, I had tried to answer myself by considering two hypotheses:

- "GitF is canon/it fits into S2" --> then I would sort of explain Ten's behaviour with keeping in line with his distancing from Rose and pushing her back towards Mickey after School Reunion and GitF;

- "GitF was originally planned as an episode at the beginning of S1, therefore is not to be considered canon" --> Yeah, Ten still is worried about his relationship with Rose, as of School Reunion, but then... is Mickey being aboard (and once again close to Rose) enough to justify Ten's distance?

What do you think?

TIA!

Hey! Firstly, I am so so sorry this has taken me nearly two weeks to reply to - life got in the way, deadlines and ridiculously unjust work demands, and then I lost all my DW files and have slowly had to re-download them 😂 but I'm here now! And I’m glad to see you in my inbox - hello lovely! Ah, yes. Rise of the Cyberman. Post-GITF Ten. I can’t believe I’m about to agree with your hypothesis that GITF is canon but... here we are! And you're right, ten is an absolute arsehole to Rose in this episode, just as he is in GITF, and just as he is in SR. Honesty, its a wonder why we ship them??

Stuck with you, that's not so bad. If I believe in one thing, just one thing, I believe in her. How long are you going to stay with me? Forever. I made my choice a long time ago and I'm never going to leave you. Rose Tyler, defender of the Earth! Does it need saying? Rose, her name was, Rose, and we were together. Tonight's a night for lost things being found. Who's gonna hold his hand now?

ah right yes, that's why 😭 ANYWAY I digress. Ten's behaviour in ROTC is very... Ten. And his reaction, compared to Nine's, when Rose meets her dad is very different. But... understandable. Not condoning Ten's behaviour!! But, for a moment let's forget GITF exists (I mean, if you've not already): Nine almost lost her to her dad. She's the one man she was happy to be stuck with ('stuck with you that's not so bad' FEELINGS 😭), and Nine initially shrugs it off. 'Fine, see if I care' sort of attitude (which, we all know he does, he's just frustrated that he's let himself fall for a girl he shouldn't really have). Ten adopts the complete opposite: he panics. He's desperate to keep her with him now, regardless of what's gone on in the last few episodes. But see, the previous episodes did happen. This line is such a throw away line that we don't really notice it all that much, but he's addressing what happened between him and Reinette here:

He's saying this, because he's damn sure she's never trusted him less at that moment. He broke her trust by leaving, and it might look a lot like neither of them spoke about what happened, but he knows, and Ten's dumb enough that he doesn't just know when he messed up, he's told.

And so he's keeping hold of her at the beginning, too — body angled towards hers and his arm lazily reaching behind her to physically keep her close to him because he almost lost her.

Ten is incredibly selfish, and it's unbearable at the start of series 2. Nine regnerated into Ten literally for Rose, because he loved her and the last act of the Time War was a sacrifice for love. She came back for him, she absorbed the time vortex for him, so, as much as he finds it hard to believe, he knows somewhere that she loves him. He acts instinctively, he's so in love with her and she's about to die. Ten's born out of this unbearable love Nine held for her in this moment, to the point where Ten literally only exists to love Rose. He's so sure of his love for her, that he takes it for granted. Rose took the time vortex for him, and that's it then. She's in love with him, he's in love with her, so just go for it. But then comes actually... going for it, and he realises he can't. He's going to lose her, and he needs to bring them both back to reality because this is real. It's like when you fancy someone and you know, realistically, you can't have a future with them for whatever reason - different religion, one wants children while the other doesn't. You still go for it, because it gets to a certain point where you have to act on your feelings, but one day you will have to face those conflicts and you will always have to end things. Ten puts a stop to them, and the only way he can put a stop to them for her is by slapping her in the face with reality. Again, Ten's an arsehole. But then he slaps her in the face with reality so hard that he nearly loses her. He doesn't want that, but he can't exactly... declare his love for her after what he did.

"Rose, I know I've made you feel awful for being human and for leaving me behind by dying, and I know I did exactly that to you the very next day, but I love you and I don't want you to leave me behind."

Rose would rightfully bollock him. So he tries his best to rationalise, making this less about him telling her what to do and what he wants, and more about reminding her why she's living in a fairytale world where her dad never died and he's still alive. That is her dream come true, but, just as its impossible that they could have their happily ever after, it's impossible that her dad's still alive.

And you can see Mickey in the background getting pissed off, wincing at how bloody harsh he's being... but, he's right. He could have snapped at Ten for being an arse, telling him to go easy on her, but he doesn't, because somebody had to say it.

On Mickey, he's not convinced in any way that somethings going to happen to Rose to change her mind. He knows she's going to be alright, but the Doctor doesn't. He's panicking massively, and the fact that he's still being aggressive even here, without Rose, just goes to show how furious he is with himself for giving her a reason to leave him.

Imagine him, in the TARDIS and before Mickey arrives, cursing himself for what he did. Rightly so, because he was a dick, and this is almost satisfying to watch. But we don't get to see it explicitly, we only get the idea that, behind closed doors, he knows he fucked up big. He even admits that he's worrying about what's going to happen.

So bloody satisfying.

But then there's the other thing: she never existed in this world. Look at how he drops his facade for just a moment,

He doesn't say "well, of course not — why would you?", or point out that it's even more proof that this world isn't right for her, his hearts break for her. It's as bad as it gets for Rose - knowing that her mum and dad are happy in this world without her. She's not needed, literally anywhere. And that's when he shifts his tone.

He protects Pete, brings him with them because he knows how much he means to Rose,

but most of all, he reminds her that she's something, she's worth so much more than the lies she's telling herself, the lies he made her believe when he left her behind, that she's important and this world's got it wrong by not having her in it.

All these different worlds, not one of them gets it right.

Ten would go above and beyond to not admit his feelings for Rose — well, that's not true, he wouldn't admit his feelings for Rose to Rose — but ROTC/AOS marks a turning point for him. He got cocky, he took her feelings for granted, he took them for granted, and he nearly paid the price. He's not getting that close again, and, contrary to ROTC, he does declare his love for her from then on. He's unafraid to show it from the Idiot's Lantern onwards — he's terrified, because he knows he's going to lose her — but he lets his guard down because she deserves to know. She deserves to feel wanted, to feel important. He doesn't do that by telling her, he does it by showing her. By believing in her to defeat the devil, by fighting tooth and claw to get her back after her face — she — was stolen, by constantly putting his faith in her to save the day and save him, by telling her she's his hand to hold, she's his home, that, by the time he's giving her the option to live with her dad and be safe with her dad, she's empowered enough for make her own decision about what she really does want. And that's him. His anger in this episode is completely directed towards himself. He's harsh with her, but it's in character, because Ten loathes himself so much that he's just filled with fury and rage. Tentoo's exactly the same, filled with blood and anger. He's not afraid to show it, but he also doesn't really know how to show anything else. He's either giddy and flirtatious, or tearing down his enemies — which is often himself. He doesn't deal with emotions at all, so when he feels things that terrifies him, he gets snappy. He gets impatient, things are rapidly falling out of his control and she he does anything to get them back. Ten/Rose coming from GITF to ROTC is similar to Ten/Rose going from AOS to TIL. By the time 2.07 rolls round, they're madly in love. And it's why I think they spent a little bit of time at the Powell Estate mid-series 2, where he finally calms down and realises she's safe with him, and he takes the time to console her. She's lost Pete, she's lost Mickey, and now that he's not going to lose her, he loves her instead. WOW this one got away from me — not sure I even answered your question?? 😂😂 But I hope you enjoyed either way!

#loup.ask #answered #loup.gif #dw meta #ten x rose #tenth doctor #rose tyler

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sflow-er · 10 months ago

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I want to preface this by saying I actually relate quite a lot to Henry Cavill's original statement. Even if gratuitous sex scenes aren't as prevalent in actuality as they sometimes seem, they are still a regular occurrence, and I'm not a fan of them. To be honest, most of them just make me roll my eyes.

I also don't need sex scenes as proof of two characters being into each other. In fact, I often feel like they are used as a lazy alternative to showing why the characters are drawn to one another. I need to see good chemistry to buy that they would have sex, not the other way around. When the chemistry is there and the scene is well made, it can definitely add to the story - but even then, I don't necessarily need to see much of it.

That being said, I respectfully disagree with many of the points made in the original post and OP's addition.

I don't follow the logic of Bridgerton being listed as an example of the "less gratuitous" end of the scale. I've only seen the first season, but holy crap was there a lot of sex in it. I get that it's consistent with the book series (or so I've heard), but there were so many of those scenes, and many of them were really long too. I felt like sex was definitely used as a selling point for that show.

Not to mention that Bridgerton S1 was quite problematic in the way Daphne's rape of Simon wasn't fully acknowledged as such. Apparently it was a huge improvement from the novel, but it was still a serious error in a show where their steamy sex life was heavily featured.

As for GoT, there may be more sex scenes in the show, and I agree many of them are gratuitous (e.g. all the random brothel scenes). However, there are still a lot of mentions of sex and also sexual violence in the books, so it's definitely consistent with the ASoIaF world. George R.R. Martin was also involved enough in the making of the show that it's probably safe to say he didn't have any major objections.

As for the sex scenes that are written out in the ASoIaF books... I would just like to point to the wedding night scene in GoT, where 13-year-old Daenerys willingly consents to sex with her 30-something husband. This isn't treated as problematic, in fact the scene is written in a sensual tone! In general, all the underage characters are way younger than they are in the show, and several of them are sexually active and/or sexually abused.

I haven't seen Sense8, but I understand the characters have supernatural powers and there's like, a psychic connection "orgy" scene? Okay, fair enough, then I guess sex probably fits. But YR is a show exploring human relationships and emotions too - isn't that the very definition of a drama show?

How does Netflix use sex as a selling point for YR? I don't think there was any in the S1 trailer, which was the original trailer they made to sell the show. The "first four minutes" clip for S2 did feature a sex dream, but again, none in the trailer that I can remember. There are some glimpses in the S3 trailer, but we've already seen that the characters are sexually active, so it's hardly a shock that they continue to be so now that they are finally a couple.

More to the point, the sex scenes in YR are not particularly explicit, nor are they gratuitous. They are short and tasteful (cutting away pretty soon), filmed with an emphasis on intimacy or the deliberate lack of it - and in my opinion, always used to further the plot or the characters' relationship.

August/Felice are shown having bad sex in S1 to highlight how performative the relationship is for them both, as well as August's character flaws. In contrast, August/Sara are shown having sweet and fun sex in S2 to establish them as a good match in that regard, add nuance to August's character, and further Sara's journey of self-discovery (and also for autistic rep reasons). As for Wille/Simon, two of their three sex scenes so far have been preceded by moments of mutual emotional honesty and vulnerability, which the characters often struggle with, both in general and in their relationship. Their first time was a huge plot point (being filmed without their consent), their second was part of the montage of their brief happiness and cut away before they even moved to bed, their third coincided with a make-or-break moment for their relationship. Even the warmly lit sex dream was mainly there as a sort of contrast to the coldness in Wille's waking life at that point.

Is everything described above problematic in your opinion simply because the characters are underage? Even though many real teens are sexually active? I was too busy being ostracised (and unwittingly asexual) back in the day, but I still recognise that it's a very common high school experience.

As for the argument that Netflix isn't about educating teens, it's important to remember that YR is a Netflix Nordic production. That's reflected in the use of an intimacy coordinator on set, hiring actors close to their characters' ages, a positive lens on safe consensual sex and masturbation, etc. This is very consistent with how sex and sex ed are viewed and portrayed in the Nordics. It's a whole different mindset compared to Netflix US, which I assume is probably the company behind Elite (which I haven't seen, but I've heard there's plenty of gratuitous sex between teens played by adult actors).

The arguments made about queer intimacy in the reblogs are very valid too. I feel like there's still a tendency in the public subconscious to label queer sex scenes as "more graphic" than straight sex scenes with the exact same content, simply because of the long history of queer sex being censored and frowned upon. So, normalising them continues to be very important even today.

For the record I don't think the original post was meant to be harder on queer than straight intimacy; OP did mention RWRB as an example of where the sex seemed fitting, after all. (Although I personally did find that RWRB was marketed as a "sexy" book and film, and the scenes in both versions are more explicit than in YR for example.)

In any case, OP, I want to reiterate once more that I do understand and relate to the general sentiment of your post! I guess it's just that I see many of your examples differently.

Okay, but I can totally relate with Henry Cavill saying that he doesn't understand the need of sex scenes. Because, me too, bestie, me too.

I understand sex scenes in some shows and movies - RWRB, Bridgerton... Because the source material has them. And if you check the book (RWRB mainly, I couldn't stand the Bridgerton books) you get the idea and the reason on why they are used. Or in a show like Sense8 that explored human relationships and emotions, so yes, sex fit there.

But... In everything?? In shows and movies where the characters are underage?? (*cough*Euphoria*cough*Elite*cough*Young Royals*cough*) In fantasy?? Why do you need that there??

An example that comes to mind is how many sex and nude scenes where added to Game of Thrones, when the books have just a few and toned down compared with the TV series.

Or how every new book that drops now, is rated ton the spicy level. How about an interesting plot instead?

Like, I get, sex sells. But is that really all that matters now?

#sex in media #young royals #bridgerton #game of thrones #a song of ice and fire #yr s3 spoilers #yr s3 trailer #(only using those two yr s3 spoiler tags because the spoiler is very very small)

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rkrispyt · 3 years ago

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what's your favorite portwell moment and why? 🥰

WHAT A QUESTION! Do you realize what you're asking of me?

To pick only one?!

Me, rooted in truth and honesty, and taking these kind of questions way too seriously, legit thinking I have to weigh everything and come up with what is truly my one all-time favorite moment?!

Oh @scorpiospectrum, my friend. You sweet, sweet angel of a human. You didn't ask for this. I'm so sorry that this novel - nay, TRILOGY of novels - is what became of a simple ask you sent my way in kindness...

I reserve the right to change my mind later (maybe even moments after making this post tbh), but lemme try to make this choice from the top moments that immediately come to mind, in chronological order...BUCKLE UP CAUSE I'M NOTHING IF NOT VERBOSE AND IT'S BEEN A MINUTE SINCE I GOT UP IN MY PORTWELL FEELINGS!

Seriously. It's disgustingly, offensively long. Continue at your own risk.

The Quinceanero interview That moment, after watching Gina so incredibly sad and feeling so alone for the first 4, most of 5, episodes, the situations I've been in that left me feeling so similar, the old feelings Sofia's performance drudged up that I legit carried with me for DAYS after one particular episode, and then seeing the lightbulb moment where she realizes how far her standards had fallen - the bar was on the floor! - when EJ asks about her feelings out of genuine interest and care is...*chef's kiss*

I knew Portwell was coming going into Season Two. I was a R*na shipper in S1 after the Homecoming ep. I was a Gina stan from day one moment one because I was a big fan of Sofia's going into the show (I had seen her dancing in youtube videos she made and was a huuuuuge fan but knew nothing else of her ). 1.10 with that look after "it just didn't seem fair for you to miss all this", after it's revealed he got her the ticket, I was like "welp, that's happening next season" and resigned to Portwell happening but not at all happy about it.

Then 2.1-2.4 happened. And I had been there. And I know now that I deserved so much more but I didn't know it at the time, and I didn't think I deserved boundaries and who was I to have standards - beggers can't be choosers, right? And I'd started off in 2.1 happy that they hadn't dropped R*na completely but very confused about where they were going with it, because he was clearly happy with Nini, and I was happy that he was happy, and I had to admit their chemistry was off the charts and they were going strong, thinking "they're solid" and so how did Gina fit into that? And then R*na got into a place that was clearly not healthy for my girl. And I realized how much Gina initiated everything in S1. How maybe nothing at all would have happened in those moments if she hadn't been the one to always start them, and that's a lot of work on only one side if there's gonna be an actual relationship. And was I really actually into R*na or was it a little bit about their chemistry that I hadn't expected and a lot about it seeming like Gina was happy and I just really wanted her to be happy (the answer, I realized, is yes lol)? I watched all that at the beginning of season two and so wanted Gina to realize she was worth more and worth boundaries and worth not having to always initiate and to always try and to always fight and getting so little back from someone.

And when she set that boundary with Ricky in 2.5 I hollered and cheered, even though I hadn't even realized how much I'd shifted from shipping R*na at that point! And when she was crying while glancing at Rini, I literally said out loud to no one "omg, at least put her with EJ, at least he'll make her happy - she deserves to be happy!!!" And I was like "woah, did my anti-PW ass really just say that I want that and mean it?"

And then EJ did the bare minimum of giving a shit about her, which made her realize who WASN'T doing even the bare minimum. And she's never gone back. We love to see it.

And shockingly, I realized I loved to see it. It was the moment that officially made me Portwell trash, because I realized I was straight up giddy about this pairing that I was soooo not here for before. They set this up so well, it even converted me, and I never ever never multi-ship. I find my OTP and I stick with it or I have ships I like in a more chill sense but they don't give me all the feelz (as the kids used to say). Like I really dig Kowie and Rini and Redlyn and Seblos, but I don't get feelz and giddy about them, y'know? I get 'awwwww' about them, which is good but not OTP level good. I digress.

Somewhere on tumblr is the post I made after that ep. I think I unfollowed the R*na tag and dipped into the Portwell tag for the first time that day, reblogged a post from someone else being pleasantly surprised about liking PW, and I said something like "listen, when I tell you I was not here for it...I was REALLY not here for it. But now I want this REAL bad. What is happening?"

And that was the beginning of it all. :)

Career Day/Interview I will never in my life get over the way this absolutely charmed me. I swear there were unicorns and rainbows and puppies and shooting stars and everything happy and lovely and innocent and delightful and EASY in this scene between the early-stages-of-flirting flirty banter, Gina's snort, EJ's reaction to it, and that perfection of a moment when EJ is denying feelings, shows his hand with "why, did she say something?", Gina enters and hilariously bolts, and EJ's reaction to the camera. I am not worthy. Seriously, the moment that happened, I knew "this is going to be one of my favorite moments of this whole damn series." Perfection. So seemingly small but one that encompasses what I love about them so much. She had come from such sadness. So had he. And they were just so light and easy and smiling and giggling with one another. We saw how they just made each other so happy. It seemed so simple, so easy. This is a strong contendor for my fave I think.

The Couch Scene Actual footage of me watching the couch scene:

I always feel like the couch scene should be my favorite. It's a solid moment that really lets us know without a shadow of a doubt that this is happening; that it's not gonna be rushed so settle in; that it's going to be prominent; that they'd both given so much to others (her to Ricky, him to Nini) and were already finding that balance so well between giving and getting with one another, neither just taking or letting the focus be solely on them, they actually see one another and care about the other and appreciate being seen or making sure the other is seen; that it's going to have depth and be handled with care and real thought by the writers. I was truly surprised by the focus it got (I mean, that scene is so long!) and was so excited about what was to come. I was in Heaven realizing "oh, this isn't going to be some quick thing where we don't see things happen and we're told they get together or made more of a connection - we're gonna see it all and it's gonna be a journey with true connection and depth. OKAY!"

It's up there in my top three for sure.

AirPortwell Truly I could not tell you how many times I've watched this scene. The number is infinite, play it on my tombstone lol. I literally still watch it every single time it comes across my dash. I am powerless not to. I mean, if nothing else, the cinematography with the escalators is flawless. But also it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside every single time.

What I love so much about this moment is that it's one where the progress and change that these characters have made hits us in the face. It's happened slowly, it's happened painfully, it's been work for each of them, but now look at where they are and how far they've come. They're not there or those people anymore. Now they're here. They're these better versions of themselves.

First of all, the way he acknowledges the Duke sweatshirt?! Like it's not a big deal?! SIR! I thought we were being coy about this and not blatantly admitting gestures like giving her your sweatshirt, let alone calling out that she's wearing it?! MY DUDE! I was not ready. I'm not ready every time I watch it, lol.

The way that EJ swoops in, not focused on what he might get out of the situation or trying to win her over romantically with what he's doing, just there to help her and be there for her because she deserves it and he is going to make sure she gets it...it's just so selfless, from someone who in the past had maybe not been selfish but was certainly self-centered and self-serving in a problematic way. He just takes care of her. He's a partner without even realizing it, lightening her load, knowing she's had a rough day and saying "relax now, I've got this, I've got you". It's in the way he offers to bring her back the next day, a plan already formulated; the way he hands her the granola bar in case she's hungry; the way he takes her bags and heads off, literally lightening her load. And the fact that we, as the audience, see that and don't even question any of it because of course EJ would, it's what he does and the kind of guy he is, is huge. It's that moment we realize "oh! At some point EJ went from being the guy that we knew was gonna listen to that voicemail even as Ashlyn laid out all the reasons he shouldn't and he clearly knew better, to the guy that would obviously be the gentleman and chivalrously come in to help someone he cared about that was having a rough time". And let's not even talk about how absolutely adorable it is seeing his face light up, excited to surprise her. The way he's looking at her like a little kid on Christmas morning before he makes his presence known on that escalator, and he just beams as she realizes what's happening is just...I can't. I. CANNOT.

And last but not least: Gina's reaction to it all. I'm still on the fence deciphering the post she makes. Someone said with certainty when it first aired that she'd posted it to see if he responded/how he'd react. It kinda makes sense, especially with the way she steps away from Jack to do it, and kind of takes a breath after like "ok, now we wait and see...". There certainly feels like there's a weight to her doing it, and not like she just steps away for a second to make a meaningless post. Especially cause like, why interrupt that moment just to post that, it's not urgent in any way, it could've waited until after. But I don't know. I feel like I haven't worked out what's meant to be expressed by Sofia's performance in that moment.

But that interpretation could certainly tie in to her moment at the top of the escalator. It would mean she might be looking at her phone, seeing no one has/EJ hasn't commented or reached out at all. It could be that she was hoping he'd see it and offer to come get her. Or honestly it could just be her after a long day looking to see what Uber options she has, just tired from her day. There's potential for something kinda cute if it was about seeing if it got a reaction from EJ though and I won't deny to anyone who subscribes to that belief that it's a possibility.

But even without that, we get so much from her in this. We see her really have standards for herself. We see her reaction as Jack walks away, a pensive, intrigued look and sort of "hmm" exhale she does as she thinks on all that's occurred with him that day, what that option is that she's just walked away from, and whether it's what she wants. And then we see her reaction as EJ walks away...which I'll come back to, lol.

This moment when she realizes he's there is another one that I relate to HARD. Have you ever just had a rotten experience, or a rough day, whatever it may be or for how long, and you push through, and you have some people by your side through it, and you make the most of it the best you can with those around you...but then you finally get out of that to someone who feels like home? Someone who makes you realize "oh, that person by my side that helped me make the most of this rotten day doesn't actually even compare to you". Whether it's your mom or your best friend or your crush? It's that person that you didn't even realize you were wishing was there with you the entire time. That person would have made the whole miserable thing so much better somehow just by being there with you. Because you love being with them so much. Because they make you feel a way so few others do, whether that's just like you can be yourself or like you don't have to carry your burdens all alone or because they give you butterflies.

I watch that scene and see the genuine shock on Gina's face as she realizes it's EJ, and he's at the airport, and he's there for her, and she's trying to wrap her head around it...and then there's just joy. Unbridled, uncensored joy. Which is huge for guarded, burned in the past, be careful you don't misread the situation Gina Porter.

I watch that scene and I feel a kindred spirit as it dawns on her how happy she is to see him, and that she had a little adventure today but how happy she is that he is there with her now. That the person she really wants to be with her is finally here.

I watch that scene and I remember having days that tested me, that are ones for the books whether good or bad, that are those stories you can end up laughing about and retell forever, and how some of them I still remember feeling "oh how much I wish so-and-so had been there with me". That this person was the one I'd wanted to see and have with me all day. Maybe temporarily things seemed absolutely fine without them, and then they're there and you're like "oh no. No things weren't this and how I feel with you. There was so much missing."

I also love that once she realizes he's there for her, and it's all really happening, she's so taken aback by it that she doesn't say another word for the rest of the scene. PERFECTION.

It's like she's so caught off guard by it all, she doesn't have time to put her guard up, or censor what she's feeling or what she might be revealing. She stops being careful for just a moment, because she's blindsided by his presence. All she can do is feel all those overwhelming feelings, and have that big realization, and show it all over her face. All she can do is look at him like he's a unicorn, trying to wrap her head around the fact that he's there. That he didn't reach out first to offer, he just showed up. He's here right now, just taking care of her, not even giving her a chance to protest that she's no damsel in distress. He knows her so well that he brought what she'd wanted without knowing she'd been without it. He's there and 'Jack who?' He's there and no, she doesn't have any second thoughts about walking away from the chance to have her first kiss because that wasn't this, and even if it doesn't end up being with EJ it should be with someone who makes her feel like this. He's there and she's so happy that he is. He's there doing all this without even giving her the opportunity to question or protest, just to accept that someone cares and is going to help and she doesn't have to do it alone.

Then we see her watching EJ walk away. He's left her dumbfounded but in the best way. We see her beaming (that smile!!!), wrapping her head around what's happened, taking in all that transpired in that whirlwind moment when suddenly he was there, and she didn't have to worry anymore. We see her brain not having a chance to talk her out of it for once, in this brief moment where the feelings get to take over because there's nothing to stop them. And we see a similar "hmm" moment.

Watching Jack walk away there seemed to be a bit of questioning or wonder. With EJ there is just certainty, acceptance, and undeniable happiness.

I've always felt like through this episode we saw Jack help her get what she needs herself (with the whole "this is how you get yourself into the lounge if you're hungry and you forgot your granola bar. Ok now you do it"), and we see EJ show her that she doesn't always have to do it herself, that there are people she can rely on to help her, she doesn't have to bear her burdens alone. She's not a damsel in distress but she's also not an island. And this is Gina we're talking about, so it's clear which one is the 'lesson' she really needs to learn for growth from who she was and has always been because of her circumstances.

Risotto for real The stuff I LIVE for in stories and performances are these little, very real, weighted, layered/nuanced moments. Ones where you stop and really grasp all the aspects of it and realize how much is packed in there.

When EJ asks her out is maybe the biggest of those moments for me with Portwell. Along with probably Gina's reaction to EJ showing up at the airport.

The couch scene, fake dating, the classroom for career day, co-anchors, Wonderstudies, "may I have this exercise?" are all pretty clear cut. They're lovely and adorable and squee-worthy, but they're not as weighted because the stakes aren't high just yet.

The way I yelped - YELPED - at 3:30am in my apartment when they did the throwback to Risotto when he asked her out...I was certain I was dreaming. But then, so much more was happening, and I've watched that scene so many times just reveling in it all. It's my faaaaavorite thing as an actress and a director/choreographer to have all these things going on, all these ways to be looking at a moment, when it's really complicated if you think about it. That's my jam. That's like Christmas morning to me.

In that whole exchange, we see EJ approaching her trying to play it cool. For the first time maybe he's not just being himself, he's trying to be something to be cool to her. We don't really know why until he asks her out, and then looking back it's like "aaaaah, ok, it was nerves coming out as faux confidence and bravado". The way he tries to be all suave with his delivery of "how's the slumber party going?" and "cool" like some casa nova rather than just acting effing normal?! Hilarious. YES PLEASE.

The way Gina has a moment of (my interpretation of it at least) looking at him, knowing she's been here before and not wanting to let herself get in too deep so giving short answers that won't lead to a longer convo or flirty banter, then deciding to remove herself from the situation even though no doubt she wants to stay there giggling and flirting with him like her "shouldn't we all stick together?" self normally would?! YES PLEASE.

EJ's face as she's walking away and he makes the decision and we see him swallow then blurt it out before he loses his nerve?! YES PLEASE!!!! I have been in that moment so often, when I think "I'm so scared to do this, I'm not gonna do it..." and then some small voice in me is like "be brave, come on, don't let fear stop you from what you want" and I know in that split moment if I don't just do it, I'll overthink it and it'll never happen. I identify so much with that split second where he seems resigned to it, then "no, but I want this, I'm gonna do it", swallows as if to express "here goes..." and just says it before he can change his mind or chicken out, it's insane how much I identify with it. The way we see him watching her walk away and then he decides it's worth it is just...beyond words.

Then when she stops and looks at him with that expression that says so much! The moment of shock, then that very nuanced look she gives him that's simultaneously charmed by how sort of un-smooth his invite was, and her being sort of amused yet confused by the Risotto reference. YES PLEASE!

And then is one of my favorite moments of EJ ever: when he really just lets his guard down and we get a rare glimpse of his absolute, unveiled vulnerability in the way he says "for real this time?" Gone is the faux cool guy he attempted to be with her when he first approached her to ask her out. Gone even is the momentarily brave EJ that blurted out the invitation before she could walk away. All that's there in that moment is someone being real, and simple, and scared, and putting himself on the line completely to potentially be disappointed in a big way. There is no pretense that he's anything but vulnerable in that moment, and that his intentions are real because of what he's referencing. The subtext feels very "I want you to be my girlfriend (or "I want to be your boyfriend") for real this time". And I will never ever ever ever never get over it.

Ugh. Then Gina. We do not deserve Sofia Wylie. The way we see her joy, but blink-and-you'll-miss-it because then immediately in creeps that baggage that makes her doubt, convinced she's misread the situation again, talking herself out of what her instincts are telling her because she's been wrong in the past. It's like she has to find a way to stop herself from believing it could be real, even if her reasons are a stretch. 'Oh. I just mentioned all this to Ashlyn and she wasn't buying that I'm cool with him not being into me. She must have interfered because she's convinced I'm wrong.'

Seriously, the way that Sofia plays this moment and whole scene is one of my favorite things ever. The way she's a little awkward when he first approaches her because she knows how she feels and that she's fallen for a friend again, decides she's not going down that path so makes a flimsy excuse to walk away from him rather than letting herself flirt etc. because yes she wants to but she's going to be smarter this time and start to pull away to make those feelings stop before she's hurt again. The stakes are a little high, and then she seems to talk herself out of believing he's asking her on an actual date or that he's also interested in her in that way, and so the stakes DROP. They do a huge swan dive, cannonball, vanish as she thinks she realizes what's really happening: he's only doing this because his cousin forced him into it. It's not a big deal, he has no stakes in this. Even everything she's got riding on this falls away as she's instead consumed with "oh Ashlyn, so ridiculous that she'd meddle like this". Everything's lighter as the focus is on the seeming silliness of Ashlyn butting in.

Then she sees that he genuinely doesn't know what she's talking about. Not only that, but he uses a phrase that is familiar to her and her own feelings of uncertainty and confusion and doubt about what's happening between them. And she looks at him and has this revelation that is so layered! "Oh he DID mean it like that. Oh maybe he's as confused about it as I am...but he totally just put himself on the line and I just acted like it wasn't a big deal. Oh he could've just taken the out I gave him inadvertently and he didn't. Oh. OH SHIT."

And the stakes are immediately higher than ever. And she's immediately so HAPPY as everything he just said and his intention around it sinks in. Fucking brilliant. The way she just so honestly says "yeah" that first time has such a "that would be AWESOME" vibe, it feels like this enormous exhale after not realizing she's been holding her breath, saying to him so earnestly 'YES, I'm into this too!' in that one word...seriously Sofia, we are not worthy.

Finally, the way they just STARE AT EACH OTHER WITH THOSE BIG DOPEY GRINS?! Are you kidding me?! The way for the first time neither of them try to hide what they may be feeling, the way they don't break eye contact until Gina finally seems to realize how long the moment has gone on and gets even more goofily happy and finally breaks eye contact, the way that seems to break whatever spell they're under, the way EJ LITERALLY finally exhales since asking her (almost as if he was waiting for a 'but' during that moment they were just staring at one another), is all too much for me. The grin that breaks out on his face, the dopey way he says "ok" like "I DID IT! AND SHE SAID YES!" makes my heart do somersaults.

And the cherry on top: the way Gina clenches her fists and does that little giddy run over to Big Red because she's so happy but has to try to keep it under control and can't just do a little happy dance right then and there is PERFECTION.

Like I said, I will never get over this scene and all the little nuggets and the nuance. Or the way I chuckle thinking about how EJ really tried to come over to her at first like he was Danny Zuko all smooth and suave like he was gonna be some cool casa nova and ask her out, lol. The way this was written, directed, and performed for that short little journey of him deciding to just be himself and put himself on the line, show how he felt, and how she tries to make those excuses but eventually is forced to realize "oh, this might actually be what I want?" is pure gold.

Something There I still have no words. None are needed.

The moment they both glance towards where they know the other is on the other side of the legs and have this look that indicates they've got it bad for the other, while not knowing the other one is doing the same thing that very moment, I still cannot believe we got. It's the way they cannot seem to stop looking at one another, especially professional, 'all business' Gina Porter being ON STAGE IN A SCENE and sneaking glances at EJ Caswell as he does the same in the wings.

One thing I haven't seen anyone mention before that I love about this pertains to the moments they're openly looking at one another for the other to see. They make no excuses for why, offer no explanations. They're going for Risotto. He asked, she said yes, they both have an understanding or assumption of what it means the other is feeling. This hits harder when it's contrasted by the moment in 2.12 where he's gone into defensive/protect myself mode because of what Jaime said, while Gina's still in this place. She's doing and saying things that half an hour ago he'd flirt with her about or laugh at or compliment her on ("yo Gaston!", her little twirl showing off her outfit, joking about rescheduling, questioning the squid ink risotto he was joking about earlier) but the bubble they were in has been popped for him by bad intel ;) and now he's gone back to being too scared to put himself out there enough to return to how they'd been since he asked her out and she said yes.

In this moment though, and the scene before it in the hallway when Jaime's introduced, and no doubt in the two weeks leading up to opening night after he asked her out (goodness, how fluff filled were those two weeks?!), they are both letting their feelings be out in the open. They're flirting, they're happy, they're not disclaiming any of it but instead are letting the other decipher what it means including the possibility that *gasp* 'he/she will think it means that I like him/her! I'm not saying I do...but I'm not saying or acting like I don't...' Fluffy fluffy goodness and I am so ecstatic to at long last see these two characters I loooooove finally happy and finally surrendering to the reality that they make one another happy and not being so afraid of it (or so we think) anymore. They've earned it. The writers and actors earned it. And this payoff feels so good and so so deserved.

Honorable Mentions: *taking photos at HoCo (even then when I wasn't shipping it I remember this scene and thinking "holy hell they look goooood together") *the shoulder bump in Salt Lake Slices in 2.10 *I'm an unapologetic simp for the duster and the bluster. Matt's "I meeeeeean" is one of my favorite things ever, lol. But the fact that they're so adorable, in a light, cute, sort of comical way, and that they finally admit to the crew that they're into each other ("someone I dig...a lot" and Gina admitting it's a date) after so much "no, we're just friends!" up to this point, is so underrated. *I'd say the kiss but OH YEAH - WE DIDN'T GET TO SEE IT YET!! That being said, shout out to EJ dropping his bag in the parking lot to go get his girl and Gina's giggle before she starts running towards him/they run towards each other. Ma'am. Who gave you the right to make that moment so effing cute? *their convo/moment in 1.10 when we find out he got her the ticket and she looks at him at the end of it like maybe she's misjudged him this whole time *and one that legit almost made my short list but the reasoning doesn't hold a candle to the ones I listed: the moment in the airport when Gina's smiling like a smitten kitten after ending her Facetime with EJ, GIGGLES(!!!), looks up to see the camera crew has caught her, realizes she's busted, and immediately drops her smile knowing they know what's up. The way I love that moment, because we see, when she thinks no one's watching, unfiltered for the first time truly how she feels about him, and that she drops her smile so she KNOWS she feels it and she KNOWS that she's hiding it normally? GTFO, I can't deal.

THE ANSWER, AT LONG LAST TO YOUR QUESTION... now that I've spent waaaay too long typing this all up and going deeeeep into my Portwell feels instead of doing what I needed to get done tonight (eek!), and after going to watch a youtube video of all their season two moments to help me decide, lol. Shoot. This was much more difficult than I expected, and I was expecting it to be a doozy!

Ok! My favorite Portwell moment?

*drumroll*

I think I gotta go with AirPortwell.

Yeah, I think that's the one.

It was so close and such a hard decision (CLEARLY judging by the absolutely disgusting length of this post) but in the end I think the clincher was how I'll always remember what that scene meant in my journey as a Portwell shipper.

First and most importantly, I always thought with Portwell that it was clearly going to be Gina that would be the one most reluctant and that would need won over. She seemed to end last season with her feelings for Ricky still there. She seemed the least emotional, like she'd learned to operate with her brain and not her heart. It seemed as if Ricky opened her up to the latter in S1 and I could only foresee that the burn from that not working out would cause her to retreat into her non-emotional state more than ever before. She also has just always struck me as someone who'd really have a journey to get to a place that she'd be willing to be vulnerable. I always felt like she was going to be the one that would be admitting or realizing last, and that a/the big obstacle for this ship would be her not being willing to open up or admit feelings or be open to exploring feelings.

But it was this episode where we finally saw that our girl was a GONER, and I never ever expected we'd get something even close to this in a million years. I felt like Portwell officially sailed in this scene.

I remember watching this episode and waiting for the other shoe to drop the whole time after the camera crew 'caught' her being all smitten after the Facetime with EJ. That something would change her mind and she'd make some decision to not pursue or be open to that and it'd be put to bed for good. But it didn't happen. In fact, the exact opposite happened. We got to see at the end of this episode that Gina had fallen. Not only that, but she realized it. And she had realized she was ready to be open to the possibility of opening her heart up to someone again. The power or upper hand felt like it was Gina's from 2.5 to 2.7, and honestly through a lot of 2.8. But by the end, we saw that she was just as powerless as EJ about her feelings, and he had the upper hand with her as well. We saw him all calm and cool while she was the one with heart eyes this time. And from this ep on, we knew they were on equal footing, both crushing on one another, both getting a second chance.

Also though, this episode was the one that I realized how much this ship had won me over and how invested I was. There was some speculation (treated like spoilers tbh) going around I think literally hours before this ep about something very different happening, setting things up to go a different route. The confidence with which it was put out there had me convinced I'd missed something and it was true. I remember debating whether or not to stay up and watch it, thinking things like "why did they do all this to set it up if they're just going to tear it all down this ep? Ugh, that SUCKS!" I went to bed figuring I'd wait and see in the morning how upset other Portwells were after seeing it and then decide when I'd watch the ep, but then I ended up not being able to sleep (for totally unrelated reasons). I realized at one point it was after 3, debated for a few minutes, and finally decided to watch. I think it was after they snuck into the VIP lounge that I was like "I have to know, I can't just watch this and wonder" so I did something I never do and skipped ahead to the end to see if she was gonna get with/kiss Jack or something along those lines. And I saw EJ arrive and that they were talking and that it was close to the end time-wise so it must be the last scene, and it gave me hope so I went back to where I'd stopped and finished it.

Afterwards I was like "the hell?! I got myself so upset and worried when this episode ended up SOLIDIFYING that Portwell is happening?!" I try to remember the lesson of that when I see things that might normally freak me out or see others seemingly in crisis.

It just holds a special place in my heart. It makes me feel a lot of things, mostly grateful for what we got because I was convinced it was all going away that ep and we wouldn't get anything more.

Like I said, all up in my Portwell feelz now.

Leave me. Save yourself.

There ya go, my friend! How sorry are you that you asked? lol

#portwell #portwell nation #hsmtmts #anti-rina #gina porter #ej caswell #my babies #ask #I seriously don’t know how anyone can comprehend this written train of thought but bless you if you can get through it

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