#Hey I manage to keep up with the deadline as long as I remember the other side of the globe is still 4 august 🤣

[yueasuka]

Day 2 of Adrien AUGreste : Truth for @adrienaugust

He didn't remember when he reached his room, he didn't even remember detransformed or when exactly he parted way with Ladybug. He just did, and now he's in his room, on his bed to be precise. For how long, he doesn't know.

"What now?" The voice that was so similar to Plagg's voice asked (or maybe his voice) but he couldn't answer it, he just didn't have enough energy to do so and even if he had, what should he answer anyway?

"Adrien, drink this."  

He lifted his head up from the pillow that he used to stuff his face with and saw Plagg with a glass of water in his hands. He looked worried, perhaps the most worried looks he ever saw from the years of time he had spent with the kwami and he shouldn't have worried him more than that. With whatever strength he had left, he pushed his body up from the bed and leaned his back against the wall before he accepted the glass. For a moment there he could see his own reflexion in it, a face that looked more tired than he had in his previous timeline despite looking much younger, green eyes that looked so dull that he wondered if there was any life in it anymore. If there's any means for his life-

"Adrien, please."  

Right, he should be focused on Plagg rather than whatever dark whisper he heard. After all, Plagg was the only one who truly cared for him. Apart from his mother, not even Ladybug ever came close. No, never her . He amended and drank the water after muttering a thank you to him.  Perhaps there was a time when he thought Ladybug did care, but upon knowing the truth thanks to another time travelling akuma, he doubted it was the case.  

If she cared, she would tell him about the reason why Rena Rouge (Furtive?) kept following them on patrol. If she cared, she would tell him the reason why she called him into the tower that night. But no, she didn't. She kept on silent even after he confronted her with the truth that he knew, because the akuma sent him back to those timeline, as if he knew what time to send him back. It's hurt, to be betrayed like this by someone who he once thought to be a partner despite them being chosen by a different person. (Perhaps, Adrien once thought, that was the reason why she always doubted him, never trusted him, because he came out of nowhere) but none of the pain from Ladybug's betrayal come as close as the betrayal from his own family.  

'How come they just replaced me with a sentimonster of all things?' After what he had done to cure his mother nonetheless.  

'Maybe a puppet is what they truly want.' He knew his father would, at least, after all those scolding and lecturing about how he must meet his father's standard for everything he did.  

Don't let Adrien remember me as a bad father. The last word from his father sparked something inside him. It was only a chuckle at first before it became a hysteric laugh.  

"Hey kid, you okay?"  

"Maybe I'm not. Maybe I'm insane after all." He answered in the middle of his laugh. He let out a loud sigh and patted his cheeks several times before he answered more for confused Plagg. 

"I always know he's never a good father. Perhaps there was a time when I thought he was just cold because he was busy and I kept disturbing him because, you know, I was a kid. But now I think again, I can't remember when exactly he ever became a good father and, as you already know, this is my third regression."

"And?"

"The fact that I couldn't even remember when he was a good father, even with the combined life I had before this, just made his last wish become ironic." He scoffed. "Don't let Adrien remember me as a bad father, he said. As if he was ever a decent father before that."

"You know kid? You, trying to find good memories of your father doesn't mean you're insane. I've seen people trying to find the most mundane thing that they believe to exist. You're only insane if you said your father is a hero and went to worship him." Plagg floated, cheese in his hands before it went into the void that was his stomach, which made him smile at the sight and rub his cheek on Plagg's head lightly. "So what are you going to do after this?"  

"I don't know, sleep?"

"Are you sure you're not going to do with this?" He pointed to his phone next to his pillow. At first he was confused at what Plagg was referring to until he saw a headline from a notification on his phone.

Breaking news : Ladybug and Chat Noir defeated Monarch. Gabriel Agreste died in the crossfire when he tried to protect the young heroes from Monarch's attack.  

He couldn't help but blink twice when he saw the notification, not believing what he had just read. He quickly took his phone and swiped right into the article and read it. Apparently, in his moment of daze (he was out of it for days???) Ladybug had already made an announcement about the result of their fight except… It's not the whole truth. She twisted the truth by saying Gabriel had sacrificed himself when Monarch tried to take their miraculous and, thanks to that heroic sacrifice of him, a statue will be built from the Alliance ring that was hacked by Monarch to honor  it.

"What? What the heck is this?" He asked in disbelief and Plagg could only shrug. "It's insane! How could she twist the truth like that?" He muttered before he swiped into another article, and another and another one, only for the result to be the same. It was the same twisted truth that Ladybug told the world about Gabriel's heroic sacrifice for the peace of the world and it made him feel sick.  

He wondered if somehow his father had already got his hands on his and Ladybug's miraculous and this was the world that he created. Except no, his father never got his hands on his miraculous. He got Ladybug's earrings, which exposed her identity to both him and his father, but in the end he never get his ring and he could get the earrings back. So, no wish. Then what is this insanity that makes her do this?  

"Forget sleeping," he said as he tossed his pillow and plushies aside before he climbed down from the bed and got dressed.

 "Let's find out the truth from her."e

[gyuuberryy]

𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐎𝐌 !

pairing: venom!jay x reader

genre: venom au, one sided rivalry, loser!jay, office coworkers, superhero

synopsis: when a geeky coworker’s transformation catches your eye, curiosity leads to a discovery far darker—and more thrilling—than you ever imagined. now, blackmail has you entangled with jay and his possessive alter ego, venom, in a dangerous game neither of you wants to end.

warnings: kissing, fighting, venom??

note: where are my marvel girlies at whoo hoo! venom is so pookie and my biggest "hear me out" hehe he got me sobbing in the theatre. jay as venom would be SO hot kjvfbvnjb >< so i wrote this to make up for me going mia for a while, i have too much school work so writing will be slow. anyway enjoyyy reading!!

word count: 2.5k

your office life was a balancing act between emails, deadlines, and… keeping your one-sided rivalry with park jongseong alive. jay(as everyone else called him), with his slightly too-short ties and endearing but tragic fashion sense, was the clueless office geek. he was awkward, quiet, and too nice for his own good. yet, no matter how awkward he was, jay always managed to excel in everything he did, effortlessly snagging the praise you thought should have been yours.

what irritated you most was that jay never seemed to notice your rivalry. he was too busy offering you help or giving you his signature polite, bumbling smile. and sometimes, you’d even catch yourself watching him a little too closely, feeling a reluctant warmth for his harmless, good-guy charm.

one afternoon, you wandered over to his desk, smirking as you noticed his usual setup: notebooks organised to the millimetre, a stack of neatly sharpened pencils, and a sticky note that read “be confident!” in his looping handwriting.

he looked up as you approached, adjusting his slightly crooked glasses and giving you a shy smile.

“hey, park,” you began, leaning casually against his desk. “did you remember to double-check the new client report? i know how thorough you like to be.”

jay blinked, his cheeks turning pink. “y-yeah, i went over it twice… just to make sure everything was right.”

“of course you did,” you replied with a playful eye roll. “wouldn’t want our employee of the month slipping up, now would we?”

he smiled, looking down at his notebook. “just doing my best.”

you shook your head, laughing softly. for some reason, you loved seeing him blush, getting him all flustered with a few well-placed jabs. jay was sweet, awkward, and, despite your constant teasing, he never seemed to hold it against you.

but the next week, everything changed.

jay showed up to work that monday looking like a different person. gone were the slightly wrinkled shirts and too-short ties. instead, he wore a fitted, charcoal button-down with the top few buttons undone, revealing a silver chain against his collarbone. his sleeves were rolled up, showing his forearms in a way that made you do a double-take. and he’d traded his old glasses for sleek, dark-rimmed ones that suited him way too well, giving him a smouldering look.

you did a double take as he walked by, giving you a casual, confident nod. “morning,” he said, his voice low and smooth. the bumbling, endearing jay you knew was nowhere to be found.

you shook it off, convincing yourself it was just a fluke. but over the next few days, you couldn’t ignore the transformation.

he traded in his ill-fitting clothes for tailored shirts, stylish watches, and a few artfully unbuttoned collars that showed off his neck and a hint of muscle. it seemed like his glasses had now permanently changed, now sleek and sophisticated, accentuating his jawline in a way that made you, against your better judgement, find yourself staring a little too long.

and it wasn’t just his style—jay’s entire demeanour was different. instead of blushing and stuttering, he’d catch you looking, smirking with a confidence that left you flustered.

one afternoon, you approached him, determined to regain some control of the dynamic. “wow, park,” you said, crossing your arms. “fancy new look. trying to impress someone?”

he looked up, a slow smile spreading across his face. “why? is it working?”

your cheeks heated, but you forced a laugh. “don’t flatter yourself.”

“oh, i don’t need to,” he replied smoothly, leaning back in his chair. “you do a pretty good job of that.”

his words left you speechless, your usual comebacks fizzling as he held your gaze with a smirk. flustered, you turned away, cursing under your breath.

when had park jongseong become… hot?

over the next week, his flirtations continued, growing bolder and more direct. every time you tried to tease him, he’d have a response that left you stumbling. gone was the stammering, geeky coworker you used to playfully bully; in his place was someone who knew exactly how to get under your skin, his newfound confidence throwing you off balance.

but one night after work, things took an unexpected turn.

you’d noticed him acting strange, glancing at his arms as though trying to keep something in check. he slipped out of the office quickly that evening, his face tense, and curiosity got the best of you. you followed him, keeping your distance as he made his way down the street, eventually ducking into a dark alleyway.

hiding behind the corner, you peeked around, pulling out your phone and hitting “record” just in case. what you saw left you speechless.

jay was standing in the middle of the alley, his body tense, his hands clutching his head. dark, inky shadows pulsed along his arms, twisting and curling like tendrils wrapping around him. his posture shifted, his shoulders straightening as the shadows coiled around his body, transforming him into something that was equal parts terrifying and mesmerising.

suddenly, jay let out a deep, guttural growl, his face contorting as sharp, gleaming fangs appeared, his once-soft eyes turning pitch black.

“finally,” a rough, raspy voice rumbled, oozing from jay’s mouth with a sinister excitement. “let’s go for a little… snack.”

a cold chill shot through you as you held up your phone, capturing the whole transformation on video. your heart was racing, but you couldn’t look away. whatever was happening to jay was unlike anything you’d ever seen.

as he turned, his gaze fell on the man who’d appeared in the alley, a figure holding a crowbar, his face twisted in anger. jay’s lips twisted into a wicked grin as he stalked toward the man, his voice dropping into a dark, predatory tone.

“ohhh, you picked the wrong guy to mess with tonight,” the voice sneered, dripping with a twisted glee. “i am going to enjoy this.”

the man froze, his face paling as jay’s shadows coiled around him, binding him in place. jay’s grin widened, his fangs gleaming as he leaned in close.

“run along, before i decide you’d make a nice little snack,” he growled, his voice a terrifying blend of jay’s and something far darker.

the man didn’t hesitate, stumbling away into the shadows. but as jay straightened, his gaze flickered over to you, and his eyes narrowed. in a heartbeat, he was in front of you, his inky black tendrils stretching out to trap you, pinning you against the wall.

you swallowed, trying to keep your breathing steady as he loomed over you, his dark, twisted grin sending a thrill of both fear and fascination through you.

“you… got that on video?” he murmured, his voice back to normal but tinged with a rough edge.

you held up your phone, smirking. “every second of it.”

his eyes flashed with a dangerous glint, and he leaned closer, his face inches from yours. “we could just… eat you, you know. save ourselves a lot of trouble.”

you raised an eyebrow, refusing to back down. “please. you didn’t even eat that guy. there’s no way you’d hurt me.”

he chuckled, the sound low and dark, his gaze flicking over your face. “hmm, true… i like you too much for that.”

the words left you breathless, your heart skipping a beat as you stared up at him, stunned. his face softened, a small, genuine smile replacing the sinister grin.

“so… about that video,” he murmured, his voice laced with amusement.

regaining your composure, you smirked, crossing your arms as best you could with his tendrils pinning you to the wall. “i think i’ll keep it… as insurance. you know, just in case you feel like getting hungry again.”

he tilted his head, his expression thoughtful. “so… what, you’re blackmailing me now?”

“exactly,” you replied, your grin widening. “you’re going to help me out with a few things, and i’m going to keep my mouth shut about your… secret.”

jay sighed, the shadows retracting as he released you, though he kept his gaze locked on yours. “fine. but don’t push it.”

you grinned, savouring the thrill of having the upper hand. “deal.”

over the next few weeks, you took full advantage of your “arrangement.” you had him running errands, fixing things around your apartment, and even carrying your heavy boxes at work. gone was the bumbling, geeky jay you’d known, replaced with someone who wielded both power and confidence—and didn’t hesitate to let you know it.

curiosity getting the best of you one day, you found yourself pulling him aside. “so… about your little… transformation,” you began, eyeing him carefully. “is he, like, a shadow monster or something?”

jay’s eyes widened, and he looked genuinely affronted. “shadow monster?” he repeated, crossing his arms. “he’s a symbiote. and he’s got a name, thank you very much.”

you raised an eyebrow. “a symbiote? i mean, he looks pretty shadowy to me.”

jay sighed, clearly unimpressed with your description. “no, he’s not ‘shadowy.’ he’s a sentient being that forms a bond with his host—me. he’s venom,” jay clarified, the name coming out almost reverently, and with a slight glint in his eye.

“oh, i see. so, he’s a person?”

“well, he has his own… opinions,” jay replied, wincing as he paused. “we’re a package deal, so to speak.”

“damn right, a package deal,” a deep, gravelly voice suddenly rumbled from within jay, and you felt a slight chill as the symbiote made its presence known.

you stared, both amazed and slightly unnerved. “oh… hey there, venom.”

venom chuckled, the sound reverberating low and menacing. “hello, sweetheart. i hear you think i’m a 'shadow monster.' "

jay rubbed the back of his neck, looking slightly exasperated, but there was a hint of amusement in his eyes as he said, “see? he doesn’t like being called that.”

you smirked, glancing at jay and then back at venom. “got it, venom,” you replied, a teasing lilt to your voice. “no shadow monster remarks. i’ll be sure to remember that.”

that evening, you called him over to help fix a squeaky window in your apartment. when he arrived, his sleeves were rolled up, and those dark tendrils emerged, forming into tools as he worked. you couldn’t help but watch, fascinated as he tightened the screws effortlessly, his movements precise and fluid.

he glanced over his shoulder, catching you staring. “see something you like, darling?” he teased, his voice low, laced with that familiar dark humour.

you scoffed, crossing your arms. “keep dreaming, park.”

jay smirked, his gaze flicking over you with a look that was anything but innocent. “oh, i don’t have to dream.”

your face heated, but before you could respond, he leaned closer, his breath warm against your ear. “you know, all you have to do is say the word.”

flustered, you quickly turned away, ignoring the smug grin on his face.

one night, as you were heading home from work, you felt someone following you. before you could react, a man grabbed your arm, yanking you into a dark alley. panic surged through you, your heart hammering as you struggled against his grip. but before you could scream, a low, guttural growl echoed from the shadows.

jay emerged from the darkness, his face twisted into a terrifying, fanged grin, his body wrapped in shadows that made him look both monstrous and mesmerising. he moved faster than you’d ever seen, dark tendrils coiling around the man’s arms, pinning him against the wall with a force that made your would-be attacker whimper.

“didn’t anyone tell you?” he snarled, his voice laced with dark satisfaction, his grin widening to show those gleaming fangs. “not to mess with what's ours.”

the man’s face turned ghostly white as he struggled against jay’s grip, terror flooding his eyes. jay’s smirk only grew, his shadowed form tightening its hold as he leaned in close, as if savouring every second of the man’s fear.

“i should just eat you,” jay’s voice growled, laced with menace and barely-concealed delight. “but you’re too pathetic for even a snack.” with a dismissive sneer, he released the man, letting him stumble away in blind terror, tripping over himself as he fled into the night.

when you looked back at jay, his inky tendrils had retracted, his monstrous form dissolving into something closer to the man you knew. yet his eyes still held that dangerous, possessive glint, and his breathing was still heavy, his gaze locked onto you with an intensity that made your pulse race.

“you okay?” he asked, his voice softer now, but with an edge of something raw and wild. his hand moved to rest on your arm, fingers lingering as if to reassure himself you were safe.

you nodded, swallowing as you tried to steady your breathing. “thanks to you…”

a wicked chuckle escaped him, his head tilting as his eyes darkened with a new, eerie glow. you could feel the presence of that “other” entity in him, lurking just beneath the surface. “oh, she’s safe with us,” it rumbled, making your skin prickle. “but i think she owes us something, don’t you, jay?”

jay’s gaze softened for a moment before that twisted smile took over again, his features shifting, the shadows flickering as he allowed his alter ego to take control.

“you really think i owe you?” you asked, trying to keep your voice steady despite the thrill that coursed through you.

“absolutely,” jay, or rather venom replied, his grin widening. “we didn’t just save you. we protected what’s ours. and i think a little… reward is in order.”

you arched an eyebrow, unwilling to back down. “and what kind of reward does a shadow monster want?”

jay leaned closer, his breath warm and tinged with something dark. “i have a few ideas.” he chuckled, his sharp fangs glinting in the low light. “but don’t worry, sweetheart. we won’t bite… unless you ask nicely.”

your cheeks flushed despite yourself, but you kept your cool. “i don’t think you’re as scary as you want me to believe,” you teased, meeting his dark gaze. “you wouldn’t hurt me.”

his eyes gleamed with amusement. “oh, i could… but where’s the fun in that?” he tilted his head, observing you with a dark curiosity. “besides… jay likes you too much. and, maybe… so do i.”

the admission left you momentarily breathless, your heart pounding as you stared up at him. just as you were about to respond, his face softened, his gaze flicking to your lips before he leaned in.

without waiting another second, jay captured your mouth in a fierce, consuming kiss. the roughness in his embrace was offset by a possessive tenderness that made you melt, your hands gripping his shirt as he pulled you closer.

when he finally pulled back, his eyes flickered between jay’s gentle warmth and venom’s dark amusement. “so, boss,” he murmured, his voice laced with that familiar, playful edge, “any other tasks?”

with a grin, you pulled him closer, “i think i can come up with a few.”

jay chuckled approvingly, his voice a husky whisper against your ear. “good… because we’re just getting started.”

and with that, he leaned in once more, his mouth claiming yours in a kiss that promised this was only the beginning of a thrilling, dangerous new game.

𝗰𝗼𝗽𝘆𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 ©𝗴𝘆𝘂𝘂𝗯𝗲𝗿𝗿𝘆𝘆 on Tumblr

˚ · .𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁𝘀 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗲𝗿𝘃𝗲𝗱

[kiesbrainjuice]

imagine kuroo or any other hq character saying 'i know, baby i know' when comforting yn hukjwbvibvinbowudfhbisro

— I KNOW BABY, I KNOW ! multiple

pr : timeskip!kuroo x reader; timeskip!bokuto x reader; timeskip!suna x reader; timeskip!kageyama x reader; timeskip!oikawa x reader; timeskip!hoshiumi x reader

syn : you have a melt down and they comfort you (ik baby, ik)

wc : 5.3k

tw : cuddles, pure fluff!

a/n : hii ! luvv the idea of that req, I did it for many of my favs and for Kuroo ofccc (one of my favs too) it took a long time to make it perfection(in my opinion) :))

KUROO TETSURO

The rain drummed against the windows as you curled up on the couch, feeling like the weight of the world was crushing you. Tears streamed down your face, and you couldn't hold back the sobs any longer. That's when you felt the couch dip beside you and a familiar warmth envelop you.

"Hey, hey," Kuroo's voice was soft as he pulled you into his arms. "What's going on, babe?"

You buried your face in his chest, clinging to his shirt. "Everything's unwell, Tetsu," you managed between sobs.

His hand moved to stroke your hair, his touch gentle and soothing. "Talk to me. What's got you so upset?"

Taking a shaky breath, you tried to gather your thoughts. "It's... it's everything. Work's a nightmare, I'm drowning in deadlines. And then there's all this family drama... I just... I can't handle it all."

"I know, baby, I know," Kuroo murmured, his voice filled with understanding. "It's a lot to deal with. But you're not alone in this, okay? I'm right here with you."

You nodded against his chest, his steady heartbeat a calming rhythm. "I feel like I'm letting everyone down," you whispered. "Like no matter what I do, it's never enough."

Kuroo pulled back slightly, just enough to look into your eyes. His gaze was intense but warm. "Hey, look at me. You're not letting anyone down. You're doing your best, and that's all anyone can ask for. We all have rough patches."

"But what if my best isn't good enough?" you asked, voice barely audible.

He cupped your face in his hands, thumbs gently wiping away your tears. "Your best is always good enough for me. And for anyone who really matters. You're incredible, you know that? The way you keep pushing forward, even when things get tough... that's real strength."

You leaned into his touch, closing your eyes. "I don't feel very strong right now."

"That's okay," Kuroo said softly. "You don't have to be strong all the time. That's what I'm here for. Let me be strong for you when you need it."

A small smile tugged at your lips despite everything. "What did I do to deserve you?"

"You're you," he replied simply. "That's more than enough."

You sat in comfortable silence for a while, his fingers running through your hair, occasionally massaging your scalp. The rhythmic motion slowly eased some of the tension from your body.

"Remember that time we got caught in that sudden downpour after practice?" Kuroo asked suddenly, a hint of amusement in his voice.

You couldn't help but chuckle softly. "How could I forget? You tried to cover both of us with your jacket."

"Hey, I was being chivalrous," he protested with a mock pout.

"You were being ridiculous," you countered, feeling a bit lighter. "We ended up soaked anyway."

"Yeah, but it was fun, wasn't it?" He grinned down at you. "We laughed the whole way home."

The memory warmed you from the inside. "And then we made hot chocolate and binge-watched movies all night."

"Exactly," Kuroo said, his voice softening. "Even when things don't go as planned, we always find a way to make it work. Together."

You nodded, snuggling closer to him. "Thank you, Tetsu. For always being here."

"Always," he promised, pressing a kiss to your forehead. "I'm not going anywhere, babe. No matter what."

You sat there for a while longer, listening to the rain and Kuroo's steady breathing. The storm inside you gradually calmed, replaced by a sense of peace.

"Hey," Kuroo said after a while. "How about we order some takeout and have a movie night? Just like old times."

The idea brought a genuine smile to your face. "That sounds perfect."

"Any requests?" he asked, reaching for his phone.

"Surprise me," you said, feeling a flicker of excitement.

As Kuroo placed the order, you settled more comfortably against him, feeling truly relaxed for the first time in days.

"You know," Kuroo said thoughtfully, "it's okay to not have everything figured out. We're in this together, yeah? Whatever comes our way, we'll face it as a team."

You looked up at him, feeling a surge of love and gratitude. "Yeah, we will."

He grinned, that familiar mischievous glint in his eyes. "Besides, I'm pretty sure between your brains and my devastatingly good looks, we can handle anything."

You laughed, swatting his arm playfully. "You're ridiculous."

"You love it," he retorted, leaning down to kiss you softly.

You kissed him back, pouring all your gratitude and love into it. When you pulled apart, you felt lighter, more hopeful.

"So," Kuroo said, reaching for the remote. "What are we watching? Your pick. Just nothing too sappy, okay? I've got a reputation to maintain."

You raised an eyebrow. "A reputation? As what, exactly?"

"As a cool, collected guy who definitely doesn't cry at movies," he said with a straight face.

"Oh really?" you teased. "So that wasn't you sobbing into my shoulder during 'Your Name'?"

Kuroo gasped dramatically. "I was not sobbing. I had something in my eye. Both eyes. For two hours."

You couldn't help but giggle. "Sure, sure. And I suppose you were just 'stretching' when you reached for the tissues during 'A Silent Voice'?"

"Exactly," he nodded solemnly. "It's important to keep your arms limber, you know. Volleyball and all that."

"Uh-huh," you said, your mood lifting with each moment of banter. "And I suppose your nose just happened to be running during 'Grave of the Fireflies'?"

Kuroo clutched his chest in mock offense. "How dare you bring that up? That's a low blow, babe. Low blow."

You laughed outright, the sound filling the room. "I'm sorry, I forgot about your 'reputation'."

"That's right," he said, puffing out his chest. "I'm Kuroo Tetsurou, former captain of Nekoma, and definitely not a crier at emotional movies."

"Of course," you agreed, your voice dripping with sarcasm. "My mistake."

He grinned down at you, clearly pleased to see you laughing. "That's more like it. There's that smile I love."

You felt your cheeks warm slightly. "Thanks, Tetsu. For everything."

"Anytime, babe," he said, his tone softening. "But don't go spreading rumors about me crying at movies, okay? I've got to keep some mysteries alive in this relationship."

"Oh?" you raised an eyebrow. "And what mysteries would those be?"

"Well, for one, how I maintain this perfect bed head," he ran a hand through his perpetually messy hair. "It's an art form, really."

You snorted. "I hate to break it to you, but I've seen you first thing in the morning. That's no art form – that's just your hair rebelling against gravity."

"You wound me," Kuroo clutched his heart again. "Here I am, comforting you in your time of need, and you attack my hair. The audacity."

You giggled, feeling the last of your earlier stress melt away. "I'm sorry. Your hair is perfect, just like the rest of you."

"Now that's more like it," he smirked, pulling you closer. "Keep the compliments coming. They fuel my ego."

"As if your ego needs any more fuel," you retorted, but there was no heat in your words.

Kuroo chuckled, the sound rumbling in his chest. "True. But I'll never say no to praise from my favorite person."

As you settled in to wait for the food and pick a movie, you realized how much lighter you felt. The problems from earlier hadn't disappeared, but somehow, with Kuroo's mix of sincere support and playful teasing, they seemed more manageable.

"Hey, Tetsu?" you said softly.

"Yeah, babe?"

"Thank you. For always knowing how to make me feel better."

His expression softened, and he pressed a kiss to your forehead. "Always. That's what I'm here for. Well, that and to provide eye candy, of course."

You laughed again, snuggling closer to him. "Of course. What would I do without your stunning good looks to distract me from my problems?"

"You’ll never have to find out," he said with a wink.

As you scrolled through movie options, debating the merits of various films (with Kuroo adamantly denying any interest in the more emotional ones), you felt truly at peace.

BOKUTO KOTARO

The rain drummed against the windows as you curled up on the couch, feeling like the weight of the world was crushing you. Tears streamed down your face, and you couldn't hold back the sobs any longer. That's when you felt the couch dip beside you and a familiar presence settle next to you.

"Hey, hey, hey," Bokuto's voice was unusually subdued as he awkwardly patted your shoulder. "What's... uh, what's going on?"

You buried your face in your hands, your body shaking with sobs. "It's my pet, Bou’," you managed between gasps. "The vet called. They... they said there's nothing more they can do."

"Oh," Bokuto said, his hand freezing mid-pat. "That's... that's really bad. Um, do you want some water or something?"

You shook your head, trying to catch your breath. "I don't know how to say goodbye," you whispered.

Bokuto shifted uncomfortably beside you. "I know baby, I know, w-well, maybe... maybe you could give them a really big hug? That always makes me feel better."

Despite your pain, you couldn't help but let out a watery chuckle. "It's not that simple, Bou’."

"Right, right," he nodded, running a hand through his hair. "Sorry, I'm not good at this stuff. But hey, remember that time your pet ate my favorite knee pads? That was pretty funny, right?"

You blinked at him, torn between laughter and more tears. "Bou’, I don't think now's the time for funny stories."

"Oh," he deflated slightly. "Yeah, you're probably right. Um... do you want me to call Akaashi? He's better at this kind of thing."

You shook your head, wiping your eyes. "No, it's okay. I just... I just need you here."

"Okay," Bokuto nodded, determination setting in his features. "I can do that. I'm really good at being here. The best, even!"

He hesitantly wrapped an arm around you, pulling you against his side. It was a bit too tight, a bit too awkward, but it was comforting in its own way.

"You know," he said after a moment of silence, "I'm not sure what to say to make you feel better. But I'm here, okay? And I'll stay as long as you need me to."

You nodded against his chest, feeling a rush of affection for your well-meaning but slightly clueless boyfriend. "Thank you, Bou’. That means a lot."

"And hey," he added, his voice brightening slightly, "if you want, we could go get some ice cream later. Ice cream always makes me feel better when I'm sad."

You couldn't help but smile a little through your tears. "Maybe later," you agreed softly.

Bokuto nodded, looking pleased that he'd made a helpful suggestion. He continued to hold you, occasionally patting your back or making small, encouraging noises. It wasn't perfect comfort, but it was genuine and uniquely Bokuto.

As the evening wore on, you and Bokuto settled into a more comfortable position on the couch. You were curled up against his chest, his arms wrapped around you in a protective embrace. The rain continued to patter against the windows, creating a soothing background noise.

"Hey," Bokuto said suddenly, his voice vibrating in his chest. "Did I ever tell you about the time Kuroo and I tried to teach Kenma how to spike?"

You shook your head slightly, curious despite your lingering sadness.

"Oh man, it was hilarious," Bokuto continued, his voice taking on that excited tone he always got when telling a story. "So, Kenma's always been more of a setter, right? But Kuroo had this brilliant idea that Kenma should learn to spike too."

As Bokuto launched into the tale, complete with animated hand gestures that jostled you slightly, you found yourself getting caught up in the story despite yourself.

"And then," Bokuto was saying, barely containing his laughter, "Kenma just looks at us, deadpan as ever, and says 'I think I'll stick to setting.' Meanwhile, Kuroo's still tangled in the net!"

You couldn't help but chuckle softly at the mental image. "Poor Kuroo," you murmured.

"Nah, he deserved it," Bokuto grinned. "He's the one who came up with the idea in the first place."

There was a moment of comfortable silence before Bokuto spoke again. "Hey, remember that volleyball match we went to last month? The one where that player did that amazing cross-court spike?"

You nodded, a small smile tugging at your lips as you recalled Bokuto's excitement during that game.

"Well," Bokuto continued, his voice taking on a conspiratorial tone, "I've been practicing that move. I think I've almost got it down. Maybe... maybe when you're feeling up to it, you could come watch me practice?"

The invitation was clearly Bokuto's attempt at giving you something to look forward to. It was clumsy but sweet, and you felt a rush of affection for him.

"I'd like that," you said softly.

Bokuto beamed, clearly pleased with himself. "Great! It's going to be awesome, you'll see. I might even let you toss for me a few times."

You raised an eyebrow. "Let me? I thought you loved my tosses."

"Of course I do!" Bokuto backpedaled quickly. "Your tosses are the best! Well, maybe second best after Akaashi's. But don't tell him I said that."

You chuckled softly, snuggling closer to him. "Your secret's safe with me."

As Bokuto continued to chatter about volleyball, his latest video game obsession, and a funny thing he saw on TV the other day, you found your mind drifting away from your earlier sadness. The pain wasn't gone, but Bokuto's presence and his earnest attempts to cheer you up were like a balm to your aching heart.

You weren't okay yet, but wrapped in Bokuto's warm embrace, listening to his animated stories, you felt like maybe, eventually, you would be.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

SUNA RINTAROU

The rain drummed against the windows as you curled up on the couch, feeling like the weight of the world was crushing you. Tears streamed down your face, and you couldn't hold back the sobs any longer. That's when you felt the couch dip beside you and a familiar presence settle next to you.

"Hey," Suna's voice was quiet as he sat down, maintaining a slight distance. "What's going on?"

You buried your face in your hands, your body shaking with sobs. "I didn't get the job, Rin," you managed between gasps. "The one I've been working towards for months. They... they said I wasn't what they were looking for."

"Oh," Suna said, his voice neutral but his eyes softening slightly. "That's rough."

You shook your head, trying to catch your breath. "I don't know what to do now," you whispered. "I put everything into this."

Suna was silent for a moment, then slowly reached out and placed his hand on your back. "I know baby, I know, but it's not the end," he said finally, his voice low and calm. "There will be other opportunities."

Despite your disappointment, you found his steady presence oddly comforting. "But I wanted this one so badly," you admitted.

"I know," Suna replied, his hand moving in small circles on your back. "It's okay to be upset about it. Take your time to process."

You blinked at him, surprised by his insight. "I didn't think you'd understand," you said softly.

Suna shrugged, a tiny smirk tugging at his lips. "I'm full of surprises."

You leaned into him slightly, and he adjusted his position to accommodate you. His arm wrapped around you, not too tight, just enough to let you know he was there.

"Want me to order some takeout?" he asked after a moment of silence. "Might help take your mind off things for a bit."

You nodded, wiping your eyes. "That sounds good. Can we just... sit here for a while after that?"

"Sure," Suna nodded, reaching for his phone with his free hand. "I can do that."

He didn't say much more as he placed the order, but his presence remained steady and calming. Every now and then, he'd squeeze your shoulder gently or brush a strand of hair from your face.

"You know," he said after a while, his voice quiet, "it's okay to feel disappointed. But don't let this define you. You're more than just this one opportunity."

You nodded against his chest, feeling a rush of gratitude for your normally aloof but surprisingly perceptive boyfriend. "Thank you, Rin. This... this helps."

Suna hummed in acknowledgment, his fingers idly playing with your hair. It wasn't an overly emotional display of comfort, but it was genuine and uniquely Suna.

As the evening progressed, the rain outside intensified, creating a cozy atmosphere inside. The takeout Suna had ordered arrived, and you both ate in comfortable silence, with Suna occasionally glancing at you to make sure you were eating.

After dinner, Suna wordlessly pulled you back to the couch, this time positioning himself so that he was lying down with you nestled against his chest. His arms wrapped around you securely, one hand gently stroking your hair.

"Better?" he murmured, his voice a low rumble in his chest.

You nodded, snuggling closer to him. "Much better," you whispered.

Suna's usual stoic expression softened slightly, a rare, gentle smile tugging at his lips. "Good," he said, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead.

You lay there in comfortable silence for a while, listening to the rain and Suna's steady heartbeat. His fingers continued to run through your hair, occasionally massaging your scalp in a way that made you practically melt against him.

"You know," Suna said after a while, his voice uncharacteristically gentle, "I'm proud of you."

You tilted your head to look up at him, surprised. "What for? I didn't get the job."

Suna shook his head slightly. "For trying. For putting yourself out there. That takes guts."

His words warmed you from the inside, and you felt tears prick at your eyes again – but this time, they were tears of gratitude and love.

"Thanks, Rin," you whispered, burying your face in his chest.

Suna's arms tightened around you slightly. "Hey," he said, his voice soft but firm. "Look at me."

You raised your head, meeting his intense gaze.

"You're amazing," he said, his tone leaving no room for argument. "One setback doesn't change that. Got it?"

You nodded, a small smile forming on your lips. "Got it."

"Good," Suna said, pulling you close again. "Now, how about we watch that terrible reality show you love? I'll even promise not to make fun of it... much."

You couldn't help but laugh, the sound muffled against his chest. "You're the best, you know that?"

Suna smirked, reaching for the remote. "I know," he said, his tone playful. "Don't tell anyone though. I have a reputation to maintain."

As the show started playing, you settled more comfortably against Suna, feeling truly relaxed for the first time since receiving the bad news. His presence was like a warm, comforting blanket, chasing away the lingering doubts and disappointments.

Every now and then, Suna would drop a kiss on your head or squeeze you gently, as if reminding you that he was there. Despite his usual cool demeanor, in moments like these, his affection was clear and unwavering.

TOBIO KAGEYAMA

The rain drummed against the windows as you curled up on the couch, feeling like the weight of the world was crushing you. Tears streamed down your face, and you couldn't hold back the sobs any longer. That's when you heard the front door open and close, followed by familiar footsteps.

"I'm home," Kageyama called out, his voice trailing off as he entered the living room and saw you. "Hey... what's wrong?"

You looked up at him, your vision blurry with tears. "Tobio," you managed between sobs. "I... I failed my final exam. I might not graduate on time."

Kageyama's eyes widened slightly, clearly caught off guard. He hesitated for a moment before awkwardly sitting down next to you on the couch. "Oh," he said, his voice uncertain. "That's... that's bad."

You nodded, burying your face in your hands. "I studied so hard," you whispered. "I don't know what went wrong."

Kageyama sat there stiffly for a moment, clearly unsure of what to do. Then, slowly, he reached out and patted your back. "I know baby, I know…um... it'll be okay?" he offered, his tone more of a question than a statement.

Despite your distress, you couldn't help but let out a watery chuckle at his awkward attempt at comfort. "I don't know if it will be, Tobio," you said softly.

Kageyama frowned, his brow furrowing in concentration as if he was trying to solve a particularly difficult volleyball play. Then, seemingly coming to a decision, he shifted closer and wrapped an arm around your shoulders, pulling you against his side.

"Listen," he said, his voice taking on the determined tone he usually reserved for volleyball. "One failed exam doesn't define you. You're... you're smart. And hardworking. Like when you're setting - one bad set doesn't make you a bad setter. You just... try again."

You blinked up at him, surprised by his words. "Tobio..."

"And," he continued, gaining confidence, "if you need to retake the class, then we'll figure it out. I'll... I'll help you study. Or find someone who can. We're a team, right?"

You nodded, feeling a warmth bloom in your chest despite your disappointment. "Right," you whispered.

Kageyama nodded decisively, then awkwardly pulled you closer, resting his chin on top of your head. "Do you... do you want some milk?" he asked after a moment. "Milk always makes me feel better."

You couldn't help but smile through your tears. "No, this is good," you said, snuggling closer to him. "Can we just stay like this for a while?"

"Sure," Kageyama said, his body relaxing slightly. "I can do that."

As you sat there, listening to the rain and Kageyama's steady heartbeat, you felt your distress slowly start to ebb. Kageyama might not be the most eloquent or naturally comforting person, but his earnest efforts and steady presence were exactly what you needed.

"Thank you, Tobio," you murmured.

Kageyama just nodded, his arms tightening around you slightly.​​​​​​​​​​

As the evening wore on, Kageyama's initial awkwardness faded, replaced by a determined sort of tenderness. He gently maneuvered both of you so that you were lying on the couch, with you nestled against his chest. His arms wrapped around you securely, one hand absently stroking your hair.

"Is this okay?" he asked, his voice softer than usual.

You nodded, snuggling closer to him. "It's perfect," you murmured.

Kageyama made a small noise of satisfaction, his body relaxing further. You lay there in comfortable silence for a while, listening to the rain and Kageyama's steady heartbeat. His fingers continued to run through your hair, the gentle motion soothing your frayed nerves.

After a while, Kageyama spoke up again. "Hey," he said, his voice thoughtful. "Remember when I couldn't get that quick to work with Hinata?"

You tilted your head to look up at him, curious. "Yeah, during your first year at Karasuno, right?"

Kageyama nodded. "I thought it was the end of the world," he admitted. "But then I figured it out. And we got even better."

You smiled softly, understanding what he was trying to say. "You're right," you said. "This isn't the end."

"Exactly," Kageyama said, a hint of his usual intensity creeping into his voice. "You'll figure this out too. And I'll be here to help. We can make a study schedule, like a training regimen. I'm good at those."

You couldn't help but laugh softly at his earnestness. "Thank you, Tobio. That actually sounds really helpful."

A small, proud smile tugged at Kageyama's lips. He leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead. "You're smart," he said matter-of-factly. "Smarter than me in a lot of ways. If I can become the best setter in Japan, you can definitely pass this exam."

His unwavering confidence in you brought fresh tears to your eyes, but this time they were tears of gratitude and love. "You're amazing, you know that?" you whispered.

Kageyama's cheeks flushed slightly, but he didn't look away. "Not as amazing as you," he mumbled.

You reached up and cupped his face, pulling him down for a soft kiss. When you pulled apart, Kageyama's eyes were shining with affection.

"Hey," he said suddenly. "Want to watch some volleyball matches? I recorded a few from the V.League. Might take your mind off things for a bit."

You smiled, nodding. "That sounds perfect."

As Kageyama reached for the remote, keeping one arm securely around you, you felt a wave of peace wash over you. The disappointment of your failed exam was still there, but it no longer felt overwhelming. With Kageyama by your side, his love expressed through actions rather than words, you felt like you could face anything.

As the match started playing, Kageyama's excitement became contagious. He pointed out clever plays and impressive serves, his analytical mind breaking down each move. You found yourself getting caught up in his enthusiasm, the stress of the day melting away as you shared this moment with him.

OIKAWA TOORU

The rain drummed against the windows as you curled up on the couch, feeling like the weight of the world was crushing you. Tears streamed down your face, and you couldn't hold back the sobs any longer. That's when you heard the front door open and close, followed by familiar footsteps.

"I'm home, love!" Oikawa's cheerful voice called out, but it quickly shifted to concern as he entered the living room. "Wait, what's wrong?"

You looked up at him, your vision blurry with tears. "Tooru," you managed between sobs. "I just got a call from home. My grandmother... she's in the hospital. They don't know if she'll make it."

Oikawa's playful demeanor vanished instantly. In a heartbeat, he was by your side, gathering you into his arms. "Oh, sweetheart," he murmured, his voice soft and gentle. "I'm so sorry."

You buried your face in his chest, clinging to his shirt as fresh sobs wracked your body. Oikawa held you tightly, one hand stroking your back while the other cradled your head.

"Shh, it's okay," he soothed, rocking you gently. "I've got you. Let it all out."

For a while, he just held you, murmuring soft words of comfort as you cried. When your sobs finally subsided into quiet sniffles, Oikawa pulled back slightly, cupping your face in his hands.

"Look at me, love," he said softly. You raised your eyes to meet his warm brown gaze. "We're going to get through this together, okay? Whatever happens, I'm right here with you."

You nodded weakly, leaning into his touch. "I'm scared, Tooru," you whispered.

"I know, baby, I know" he said, brushing away your tears with his thumbs. "It's okay to be scared. But remember, your grandmother is strong. She raised you, after all."

Despite your distress, a tiny smile tugged at your lips. Oikawa's own lips quirked up in response.

"There's that beautiful smile," he said, leaning in to press a soft kiss to your forehead. "Now, what can I do to help? Do you want to go visit her? I can book flights right now if you want."

You shook your head. "Not yet. The doctors said to wait until morning for more news."

Oikawa nodded. "Okay, then we'll wait together. How about I run you a warm bath? And then we can cuddle and watch your favorite movie. Or we can just talk. Whatever you need, I'm here."

You felt a rush of gratitude wash over you. "Thank you, Tooru. I don't know what I'd do without you."

Oikawa's expression softened, his eyes filled with love. "You'll never have to find out," he promised. "Now, come on. Let's get you feeling a bit better."

After the warm bath Oikawa had prepared for you, he guided you back to the living room. He had transformed the couch into a cozy nest of blankets and pillows. With gentle hands, he helped you settle in, then slid in beside you, pulling you close against his chest.

"Better?" he asked softly, his breath warm against your ear.

You nodded, snuggling deeper into his embrace. "Much better," you murmured.

Oikawa hummed contentedly, his arms tightening around you. One hand began to gently stroke your hair, his long fingers working through any tangles with practiced ease.

"You know," he said after a while, his voice quiet but warm, "I remember when my grandmother was in the hospital a few years ago. I was so scared, just like you are now."

You tilted your head to look up at him. "What happened?"

A small smile played on Oikawa's lips. "She got better. And do you know what she said to me when I visited her? She said, 'Tooru, my boy, it takes more than this to keep an Oikawa down.'"

Despite your worry, you couldn't help but chuckle softly. "She sounds amazing."

"She is," Oikawa agreed. "Just like your grandmother. They're cut from the same cloth, those tough old ladies."

He pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead. "Your grandmother has that same strength. And she has you to come back to. That's more than enough reason for her to fight."

Tears welled up in your eyes again, but this time they were mixed with hope. "Thank you, Tooru," you whispered.

"Always, my love," he replied, brushing away your tears with his thumb. "Now, how about we watch that alien documentary I've been trying to get you to see? I promise it'll take your mind off things."

You couldn't help but smile at his enthusiasm. "Okay," you agreed. "But only if you keep holding me like this."

"As if I'd ever let you go," Oikawa said, reaching for the remote while keeping one arm securely around you.

As the documentary started playing, Oikawa's excitement became infectious. He whispered commentary in your ear, his theories growing more and more outlandish as the show went on. You found yourself laughing despite your earlier distress, caught up in Oikawa's boundless enthusiasm.

Every so often, he'd pause his commentary to drop a kiss on your head or squeeze you gently, as if reminding you that he was there, that you weren't alone in this.

As the night wore on and your eyelids grew heavy, Oikawa adjusted your positions so you were lying down, your head pillowed on his chest. His heartbeat was a steady, comforting rhythm beneath your ear.

"Sleep, love," he murmured, his fingers tracing soothing patterns on your back. "I'll be right here. And first thing in the morning, we'll call the hospital for news, okay?"

You nodded sleepily, feeling safe and loved in Oikawa's arms. "Thank you, Tooru," you whispered. "I love you."

"I love you too," he replied softly. "More than all the stars in the universe."

KORAI HOSHIUMI

The rain drummed against the windows as you curled up on the couch, feeling like the weight of the world was crushing you. Tears streamed down your face, and you couldn't hold back the sobs any longer. That's when you heard the front door burst open, followed by energetic footsteps.

"I'm home!" Hoshiumi's loud voice rang out, but it quickly shifted to concern as he bounded into the living room. "Hey! What's wrong? Why are you crying?"

You looked up at him, your vision blurry with tears. "Korai," you managed between sobs. "I just lost my job. The company... they're downsizing and I... I was let go."

Hoshiumi's eyes widened, his usual boundless energy momentarily stunned into stillness. Then, in a flash, he was by your side, his small but strong arms wrapping around you.

"What?! That's terrible!" he exclaimed, his voice a mix of outrage and concern. "How dare they! Don't they know how amazing you are?"

You buried your face in his shoulder, fresh sobs wracking your body. Hoshiumi held you tightly, one hand patting your back with perhaps a bit more force than necessary, but the gesture was comforting nonetheless.

"Hey, hey, it's okay, I know baby, I know" he said, his voice softer but still intense. "We're going to get through this. You're strong, just like me! This is just a setback, not the end!"

For a while, he just held you, occasionally interjecting with words of encouragement and promises of retribution against your former employers. When your sobs finally subsided into quiet sniffles, Hoshiumi pulled back, his hands on your shoulders as he looked you in the eye.

"Listen to me," he said, his gaze fierce and determined. "You're incredible. Those idiots don't know what they're losing. But you know what? This just means you're free to find something even better!"

You blinked at him, caught off guard by his unwavering confidence. "But Korai, what if I can't find another job?"

Hoshiumi scoffed, puffing out his chest. "Of course you will! You're dating the Little Giant, aren't you? We don't give up! We rise above every challenge!"

Despite your distress, a small smile tugged at your lips. Hoshiumi's enthusiasm was, as always, contagious.

"There's that smile!" he grinned, reaching up to wipe away your tears. "Now, here's what we're going to do. First, we're going to eat some ice cream because that always makes me feel better. Then, we're going to make a plan. I'll help you update your resume, and it'll be so amazing that companies will be fighting to hire you!"

You felt a wave of affection wash over you. "Thank you, Korai. I don't know what I'd do without you."

Hoshiumi's expression softened, his eyes filled with determination and love. "You'll never have to find out," he promised. "We're a team, and together, we're unstoppable!"

After devouring a pint of ice cream together, Hoshiumi led you back to the couch. Despite his small stature, he maneuvered you both so that you were lying down, with you nestled securely in his arms. His body radiated warmth and energy, even in stillness.

"Comfortable?" he asked, his voice uncharacteristically soft.

You nodded, snuggling closer to him. "Very," you murmured.

Hoshiumi made a satisfied noise, his arms tightening around you. One hand began to gently stroke your back, his touch soothing and reassuring.

"You know," he said, his voice full of conviction, "you're the most amazing person I know. And I know some pretty amazing people!"

You couldn't help but chuckle softly at his enthusiasm. Hoshiumi took this as encouragement and continued, punctuating his words with soft kisses.

"You're smart," he said, pressing a kiss to your forehead. "Way smarter than those idiots who let you go."

Another kiss, this time on your cheek. "You're kind. Remember how you helped that lost kid at the mall last week?"

A gentle peck on your nose. "You're hardworking. I've seen how dedicated you are."

Finally, a tender kiss on your lips. "And you're beautiful, inside and out."

Tears welled up in your eyes again, but this time they were tears of gratitude and love. "Korai..." you whispered, touched by his words.

"I'm not finished!" Hoshiumi declared, his eyes shining with determination. "You're also brave, and creative, and funny. Any company would be lucky to have you!"

He cupped your face in his hands, his gaze intense. "And most importantly, you're resilient. Just like me! We don't let setbacks keep us down. We use them as stepping stones to reach even greater heights!"

You couldn't help but smile at his passion. "Thank you, Korai. I feel so much better already."

Hoshiumi beamed, clearly pleased with himself. "Good! Because we're just getting started. Tomorrow, we're going to make the best resume ever. It'll be so amazing, it'll make my vertical jump look ordinary in comparison!"

You laughed outright at that, the sound mixing with Hoshiumi's own joyful laughter. As your giggles subsided, Hoshiumi pulled you close again, nuzzling your hair.

"I love you," he said softly. "And I believe in you. Never forget that."

"I love you too," you replied, feeling truly comforted for the first time since receiving the bad news. "Thank you for always being in my corner."

"Always!" Hoshiumi declared. "That's what the Little Giant does. I'll always lift you up, no matter how high we need to go!"

Ⓡ kiesbrainjuice all rights reserved. please to not plagiarize, repost, or translate !

tag : @haechansbbg

[httpvomitello]

Call of Distraction *⁠.⁠✧

Donnie / Raph / Mikey

It was another routine evening in the lair. Leo was running through some katas, trying to work off some pent-up energy after a long day, when April’s phone started buzzing. She checked it and saw your name pop up.

"Hey, it's (Y/N)," she said, grinning as she glanced at Leo. "Mind if I put it on speaker?"

Leo looked up, a spark of interest flashing across his face. “Oh, go ahead.”

April pressed the button, and your familiar voice filled the lair. “April! Please tell me you’re free for a sanity break—I’ve been staring at a screen for hours, and I’m losing it over here.”

“Let me guess: project deadline coming up?” April replied, smiling.

“Deadlines, plural,” you sighed dramatically. “And all I want is some conversation to remind me what having a life feels like.”

Before April could answer, Leo’s voice cut in, playful yet slightly mocking. “Sounds like someone doesn’t know how to manage their time.”

You paused, then replied, with equal sarcasm, “Oh, hey there, fearless leader! Didn’t know you were eavesdropping. Nice of you to assume I’m the problem here.”

Leo smirked, crossing his arms as the other turtles perked up, sensing a good exchange on the way. “Well, you are calling April in the middle of our prep time. Can’t be that hard to handle a couple of deadlines, can it?”

“Oh, yeah, because I’m sure your big, intense prep is life-shatteringly important,” you shot back. “Remind me again, what’s the pressing emergency? Practicing brooding?”

Raph and Mikey burst out laughing, while Donnie raised an eyebrow, glancing at Leo with an amused smile.

Leo chuckled, barely fazed. “Brooding, huh? I seem to remember someone saying they admired my focus. Guess that was just talk.”

“Who, me? I don’t think so,” you teased. “I admire focus, sure. But that whole ‘super-serious, all-business’ attitude? Total snooze-fest. Don’t you ever take it easy?”

He raised an eyebrow, amused but a little taken aback. “You think I don’t know how to relax?”

“Oh, please. You’re about as chill as a brick wall, Leo,” you quipped. “Maybe if you spent a little less time being Captain Serious, you’d know how to actually have fun.”

“Yeah, and maybe if you learned some time management, you wouldn’t need to call for a ‘sanity break,’” he countered, though his grin showed he was enjoying every second of this.

“Touché,” you replied, clearly entertained. “Maybe you’re onto something. Guess I could use someone to keep me on track… if they can keep up.”

Leo gave a slight smile, “Keep up? I’d give it about ten minutes before you were begging for a break.”

“Oh, is that a challenge?” you replied, leaning fully into the teasing. “Pretty bold, Mr. Leader. Hope you can live up to it.”

Mikey, who’d been watching with an ever-widening grin, turned to Raph with an excited whisper. “They’re totally gonna end up dating, right?”

April just rolled her eyes, but she was smiling, clearly enjoying how flustered Leo was getting despite his best efforts. Raph nudged Donnie, stifling a laugh.

Leo, sensing the teasing eyes on him, shot a glare at his brothers but stayed focused. “Tell you what,” he replied to you, recovering his confidence. “Next time you’re ‘losing it,’ I’ll personally make sure you remember how to relax.”

“Oh really? That’s a big promise,” you replied, feigning a skeptical tone. “Think you’re up for it?”

“I know I am,” he said smoothly, a little more serious than before.

April, realizing this could go on forever, finally intervened. “Alright, alright, I think you two could go at this all night,” she laughed. “I’m hanging up now before Leo gets any more ideas.”

She smirked, giving Leo an exaggerated wink as she took you off speaker, wrapping up the call. The moment the line went dead, Leo’s brothers immediately burst out laughing, and Leo fought hard to keep a neutral expression.

“Looks like someone’s got a little crush, huh?” Raph teased, nudging Leo.

Leo rolled his eyes, but a faint blush betrayed him. “Whatever,” he muttered, half-smiling as he went back to his training. But inside, he was already looking forward to that next call.

[pastel-charm-14]

dealing with academic burnout

hey lovelies! if you're feeling burnt out with school right now, you're not alone. here are some tips to help you push through and finish strong!! (long post incoming :))

BREAK IT DOWN -

big assignments can feel overwhelming, so break them into smaller, more manageable tasks. instead of "write a 10-page paper," think "write an outline," "research for 1 hour," "write the introduction," and so on. this makes the workload less daunting and helps you make consistent progress. it's also helpful to keep track of those smaller tasks in a list.

BE REALISTIC -

prioritize your tasks and set achievable daily or weekly goals. don't try to do everything at once. make a to-do list every day, and highlight your most important tasks. this helps you stay organized but also it feels really good to check things off your list :) for example, aim to complete two math problems instead of the entire set, or read one chapter instead of the whole book, and see where it goes from there.

TAKE BREAKS -

in order to be productive, you need to rest your mind!! try the pomodoro technique: work for 25 minutes, then take a 5-minute break. after four cycles, take a longer break (15-30 minutes). during your breaks, do something completely different from your study activity. get up, stretch, grab a snack, or go for a quick walk outside. it's refreshing for your mind and body.

STAY ACTIVE -

physical activity helps reduce stress and improve your mood. so you should aim to get at least 30 minutes of exercise a day. this could be a workout, a yoga session, or even just a really fast walk. if you don't have much time, try putting short bursts of activity in throughout your day. for example, do some stretches or a few jumping jacks between pomodoro cycles.

GET SUPPORT -

talk to friends, family, or a counselor if you're feeling overwhelmed. sometimes, just having someone listen can make a huge difference!! if you’re struggling with a particular subject or area, try forming/joining a study group or seeking help from a tutor. working with others can give you new perspectives and helps with loneliness.

HAVE A HEALTHY DIET -

your brain needs proper fuel to function at its best. try to eat balanced meals with fruits, veggies, whole grains, and protein. avoid too much caffeine and sugary snacks, because those can lead to energy crashes. keep a water bottle with you and make sure you're drinking enough throughout the day to keep your energy levels stable.

GET ENOUGH SLEEP -

pulling all-nighters is going to affect your concentration and memory. go for 7-8 hours of sleep each night. get a bedtime routine in place to help signal to your body that it's time to wind down. this could include stuff like reading a book, listening to calming music, or doing some mindfulness exercises. avoid screens at least an hour before bed, because the blue light can interfere with your sleep.

REWARD YOURSELF -

give yourself something to look forward to after completing a task. a favorite snack, watching an episode of your favorite show, or spending some time on social media, really anything that makes you happy. rewards reinforce your positive behavior and make studying feel more manageable. for example, tell yourself, "after I finish this chapter, I'll take a break to watch a funny youtube video."

STAY ORGANIZED -

keep track of deadlines and dates!! it will save you so much stress!! use a planner, calendar app, or bullet journal to log all your assignments and exam dates. you can also color code by subject/priority to make it easier to see what needs attention. review your schedule often and adjust it when you need to.

GIVE YOURSELF SOME LOVE -

it's okay to feel tired and stressed!! be kind to yourself and remember that you're doing your best. if you need to take a break, don't feel guilty about it. self-care is just as important as academic achievement. try some mindfulness or meditation and just take a moment to ground yourself.

hang in there, you've got this! just a little bit more to go and it'll be all worth it in the end. 🫶

[lonelypond]

Pick Me Up, Ch. 4: Let's Get Lost

NicoMaki, NozoEli, 2.5K, 4/?

Summary: Eli, Nico Ni's long suffering manager meets Nozomi, Maki's long suffering manager while Nico and Maki ditch out the back door.

Let's Get Lost

Eli stepped out into the room, anxiety spiking. She was not comfortable leaving Nico alone with the unknown Maki, but Nico had insisted. And Eli had been making a great effort to not "older sister" either Nico or her actual sister Alisa as much. As much as Eli cared for both of them, wanting to keep them safe, she also had to  respect that they were also both adults, able to make their own decisions. And now Eli had to make her own decision: head home or wait for Nico.

"Hey, new friend." A drawling voice slid into Eli's awareness. The pretty, buxom, black haired woman with the purple streaks waved. "Take off those sunglasses and sit next to me." A seat was pushed out for Eli. The other woman in the room smirked.

"Nico said…" Eli looked back over her shoulder, only to be confronted by a door that had been solidly closed behind her. She shrugged and removed the sunglasses."Hi."

"Nozomi Tojo, Maki's long suffering manager." A pat on the chair from the purple tinted, "Sit."

"Umi Sonoda. It is a pleasure to meet you." Pen put down, hand extended for shaking.

Eli did. Strong grip, steady glance. Then a nod to Nozomi. "I'm Eli Ayase, Nico Ni's long suffering manager. Just a minute." Eli strode to the bar, "Vodka, please."

The bartender waited for specifics.

Eli raised the index finger on both hands, tapping them on the bar one after the other, "One bottle of your most expensive import; one shotglass. Put it on Nico Ni's tab."

"Put it on mine." Purring, Nozomi slid in next to Eli, who startled. "And give us a second shot glass."

"Of course, Ms. Tojo."

"We eat here all the time. Maki loves their sauces." Nozomi manuevered Eli to the seat. "And since she's doubling my salary, I need new…habits to spend money on."

Umi snorted, pulled out her phone, and tapped in a series of texts, getting almost immediate replies, which she chuckled over.

"What's so funny, Umi-chan?"

"Just updating Rin. And figuring out the odds." Umi smirked.

"Odds?" Eli asked, lost in this sketch version of a conversation.

"Umi misspoke." Nozomi stated slowly, with a warning tone Umi ignored.

Undaunted, Umi faced Eli, "Nozomi has a "habit" of short term "friendliness.""

"Are the two of you dating?"

Umi paled, "Never."

"Umi has two very lovely wives. Our other business partner and friend, Rin, has an awesome fiancèe. When business is slow, they all get bored with their home lives and live vicariously through me." Nozomi stuck out her tongue.

Umi continued typing, "I'm getting a car. If you and your new friend would like to join us, Honoka sent a pin for the new club."

"How thoughtful."

Umi dodged around the bartender, "It was nice to meet you, Ms. Ayase. I hope to see you again soon."

Eli smiled, "Same." She was a little confused about why Umi was leaving like a fire was about to break out. Maybe her wives were impatient. Nozomi scooting her chair closer, bumping Eli's knee, brought her back to her remaining company.

"So Nico Ni, huh? Must keep you busy." Nozomi opened the vodka.

Eli couldn't hold back a sigh. A new word needed to be invented for Nico, something that meant moving as fast as a hummingbird's wings hovering, while zig zagging like a dragonfly over an open lake. Eli poured a spillover shot. Nerves still shaky.

"My sister, Alisa, lectures me about taking some personal time but Nico always a new project or an album deadline or a rumor I have to shut down. Or she's doing something risky."

Nozomi noticed the trembling hand. She couldn't remember ever having seen eyes so bright and blue. And with every word they got more shadowed. It made her sad, an unexpected reaction.

"She's too available to her fans." Eli raised the glass.

"So you worry."

Eli downed the shot.

"And then she goes and lets some rich weirdo …"

Nozomi scooted closer to Eli, "Maki's rich but she's not a weirdo."

Eli frowned, "Who lies like that?"

"Maki's shy, socially awkward even. But she's a sweetheart. Kind. Loyal. We'd be best friends if she didn't already have a cat. If you want a weird pervert, you'll have to take me." Nozomi patted Eli's hand, "But I'm not rich."

Still not understanding half of what was said, Eli edged away, pouring and chugging another shot.

"Look, she didn't even tell me about the driver thing and it would have made me less mad about her ditching the gallery show and she knows that."

"She didn't tell you?" Eli was suddenly grateful Nico texted nearly every thought in her head.

"No. So it's personal. She hates me mucking in her personal life."

"So Maki just doesn't show up at scheduled events with no excuse or follow up call and you keep working for her."

"She's…" Nozomi whistled, "hot, fun to tease, and pays me more than I can spend."

"Fun to tease?"

Nozomi poured a shot, "Enough shop talk. Time for me to catch up. Two right?"

Eli nodded.

Nozomi poured Eli another shot, "Let's make it three. Do you always mainline vodka? Aren't you supposed to drink something this good slowly." Nozomi licked her tongue around the edge of the glass. "I like my shots salty."

Another sad sigh. Eli rubbed her forehead. Nozomi was not liking the way her heart seemed to be responding to Eli's gloom. She preferred keeping things light.

"Sorry. I'm acting out, I guess. Nico's just not thinking. And her siblings keep quizzing me about her security. They're imagining these scenarios that make me lose sleep at night. So explaining this Maki situation to them is just going to be…" Eli downed the shot.

"Let Nico do it. She's the one snuggling in a room with a pervert stalker."

Eli almost stood but Nozomi kept a grip on her arm. "You said Maki wasn't a…"

"I'm kidding, Eli-chi. Relax. Maki never even gets in the ballpark by the first date."

"Huh?"

Nozomi took another shot. Two down, one to go. "I know a place that makes excellent Bloody Mary's. We'd have to wait for breakfast though." Nozomi leaned in, sliding her hand up Eli's arm.

"Breakfast." A word Eli recognized. "I am hungry. I don't remember when I ate last."

"I know a place we can fix that. My treat." Nozomi stood up, "Unless you really want to finish that bottle."

Eli stared at the bottle, catching her own face reflected in it. She looked old. And worried. And tired. More frown lines than laugh lines. Too much Nico Ni. Then she glanced at the woman offering her a hand. Sharp green eyes, smart and friendly, a welcoming smile, a pretty floral wrap dress playing off the colors in her eyes and hair. Someone Eli might want to know better. Someone she had no responsibility for.

"Actually." Eli reached back and the hand she grasped was strong and warm. "I know a place. Do you bowl?"

###

They were at the car again, staring at it. Maki unlocked the doors with the remote.

"Is it really bulletproof?" Had Maki actually lied about anything or had it all been deflections?

"Yes. Papa insisted."

"Do you have security?"

"Sometimes." Maki sounded sad.

Nico could make that better. She stepped forward with a flair, opening Maki's door, "Tonight, Nico will be your bodyguard, pretty lady. You can just be hot and drive. Where are we headed?"

Maki's stomach had done a flip at Nico's gesture. Nervous, she decided on mischievous as a mood. "Just drive until we stop?"

"Where would you go?"

Maki stared up at the sky, light pollution limiting the number of stars. Light, noise, people…"Some place dark and quiet."

"Not home?" Nico had wanted to see inside Maki's life, know more than that her clothes were fly, her fingers twirled curls when nervous, her cologne smelled like a standing on a pier, crisp shirt blowing open in a fresh breeze.

"I'm restless."

"Nico is too."

"Yeah."

"And hungry." Nico moved around to the passenger side. "You should take Nico to your parent's place. You've been to my mom's."

"They live in Connecticut."

"No hideaway in the city?" Nico was in the car, but Maki still leaned against the open door. It was a good view. Nico would not be hurrying her.

Maki bit her lip. "They do have a penthouse near Riverside Park. Mostly an investment property. They host parties and fundraisers there."

Now that was more what Nico had in mind. She clicked the seatbelt in place and kicked her feet happily. "Let's go. Nico and the karaoke app on her phone is a party."

Maki laughed and slid into the car. "I know a place to grab some food."

"Good. It's been a long day; Nico's not cooking."

###

Eli still managed to give off an the air of polished professional, even with her suit jacket over her arm, and unbuttoning the top two buttons on her blue, thin striped oxford.

Nozomi was enjoying the enhanced view. And amused by their location.

"I did not know there was a bowling alley in the Port Authority."

"It used to not have a street entrance."

"Secret transit based bowling rendezvous? How clever. I love New York City." Nozomi threw out her arms.

"Now it's bowling, ping pong, karaoke, darts, pool, arcade games, great bar food, upscale casual dress code."

"Am I all right?" Nozomi had a sudden moment of doubt, holding an arm across her torso.

"You're perfect for anywhere."

Eli's enthusiasm hit Nozomi like a non revolving door. She stopped, shocked by the sudden compliment.

"I'm sorry I don't have my bowling shoes or ball with me, but the rentals are fine."

"You own bowling shoes?" Curiosity drew Nozomi back into the conversation.

"Yeah, Nico bought them for everybody in the league as a Christmas present. And the dorkiest bowling shirts ever. She said I inspired them."

"You have a corporate bowling league?"

"It's incredibly competitive. And I win. With high scores." Eli winked, "I have trophies."

Nozomi finished lacing her shoes. "Oh, I'd love to see them."

A grin.

"Doesn't Nico Ni get rushed by fans."

"There's a private room. Two lanes."

Eli moved eagerly to the shelves of balls, then stopped herself. "Oh, are you hungry, Nozomi? I can order us snacks. What do you like?"

You, Nozomi thought. I like you.

"Let's bowl a few frames first. I want to see what you've got."

An even bigger grin, "You won't be disappointed."

Nozomi smiled back at Eli, then stepped next to her, hip to hip, "What size do you think I need? I like the brighter colors."

Eli took an orange ball off the shelf, "A 12 pounder is a good place to start."

Nozomi let her hand linger on Eli's as the ball handoff happened. "It feels light."

"Very light?"

"Yeah."

"Here's a 14 pounder."

"Too heavy."

Eli giggled.

"What?"

"Goldilocks."

"I thought that was you."

Eli blushed, fidgeting with her ponytail. "Here." She spun a bright blue ball in Nozomi's direction. "That should be right."

"Blue's my favorite color. How'd ya know?" Nozomi pirouetted, "Which lane is ours?"

###

Pizza would arrive in an hour. The doorman had waved Maki in with a quick hello. Nico was impressed with how well the the early 20th century building's old money vibe mixed with modern architectural flair. Maki had said it was designed by some famous architect whose name Nico didn't remember. A terrace wrapped around the entire penthouse apartment, offering a gorgeous view of the city and the East River.

"Nico's impressed and Nico lives in Katherine Hepburn's townhouse."

"You really meant that."

"Yep. Nico took the tour, saw the huge vintage vanity in the master bedroom, mirrors on three sides, and thought classy, that's where Nico will do her makeup every morning from now on. Paid cash on the spot. Quintupled in value since then, but Nico's not selling. Nico invests in things long term. What's your place like?"

"A rowhouse, recently renovated, skylights in the bedrooms and bath, close to McGolrick Park. Lots of trees. That's what sold it for me. All green and the cool."

Nico gave Maki a thoughtful look, "Do you just spend all your time on the terrace when you visit here, Outdoor Girl?"

Maki glanced up, "The city's pretty, with all the lights. When I want to see stars, I stay home or go to a beach."

"So Stargazer Girl."

"Sure." Maki shrugged, getting bored.

Nico was great at reading audiences and Maki seemed to be falling into a toxic sort of anti enthusiasm so Nico bounced into cute mood, peeking in windows. "Show Nico the inside."

"Well, there's really only one showcase room, the Solarium. We'll go through the gallery."

Maki led the way through a long narrow room lined with art and books, then turned into a grand, open, airy room with tall windows on the sides and a ceiling made up of glass panels.

"The Solarium."

Nico whistled and spun, taking in the view, the openness, the light colored furniture, tall lamps, dark wood of a baby grand piano, "Wow. Nico is wowed."

"It used to be a second bedroom but Mama and Papa loved the thought of having music in here. The designer did well. When there's a party, it's always full of people mingling, listening to the piano, a quartet or something."

"It's a great space for it."

Maki nodded, moving to the piano.

"Wait. Used to be a second bedroom…so there's only one? Where do you stay if this is your parent's place? On the terrace?" Nico fell back into the couch, staring up through the ceiling panels.

"I don't."

"Oh." Nico didn't know what to say.

Maki seated herself on the piano bench and a slow jazz piece filled the room, a shadowy and melancholic mood tinting its edges.

"What's that? Nico doesn't know it."

""Let's Get Lost."" Maki's fingers deftly chose notes, a graceful hunt.

"That music sounds so sad about it." Nico tapped the piano.

Maki winced.

"Nico has three Map apps, we can get found." Nico waved her phone.

"That's not the…"

"What?"

Maki shook her head, blowing stray tendrils of scarlet out of her face, "Never mind. Any requests?"

This was jazz. Nico had to stretch her brain. Jazz wasn't anything she voluntarily spent time with. But there was that one singer, recently, the new artist winner at the Grammy's last year. Nico made a point of studying the Grammy nominees every year. Nico had liked her bright smile, bouncy, velvety sound, and how connected she was to her musical family. She and her father had recorded a Christmas single together. Nico would have loved the opportunity to do that.

"Jazz right?"

Maki shrugged again. As attractive as the pianist's shoulders were, Nico would love to move Maki's needle past aggressively not caring to some percentage of interest, if not enthusiasm.

"Nico's a big Samara Joy fan. How about "Can't Get Out Of this Mood."

Maki frowned, pulling out her own phone to look something up.

"Don't know that one. Someone to Watch Over Me?"

"Nico approves." Nico decided to strike a pose next to the piano, amused as Maki cocked an inquisitive eyebrow at her, "Nico will join you."

Maki bowed her head, "As you wish."

"Nico's changing the pronouns."

Now there was interest, a sparkle in dreamfuel eyes, "Good."

A/N: Been a hectic fortnight. Thanks for reading.

[st0rmyskies]

have you ever felt so anxious over writing something you just cannot bring yourself to start writing it? if so, how did you get over it? do you ever manage to write even when irl stuff is stressing you out? how?

ig what i mean is that writing is hard. how do you do it? have you ever felt like giving up on it? you just seem to write so much. ig i just want some advice, if you're willing to give it. i love your stories

-👁

Hey anon, thank you for the kind words and thank you even more for reaching out! This one is a little long so it's under the cut.

Writing is fucking hard, isn't it. It takes a lot of time, a lot of creative work, a lot of energy that sometimes we don't have in us. Sometimes life gets in the way, or we're too tired from work or school, or we have other obligations to tend to.

First and foremost, it's important to remember:

You need to do what makes you happy.

This is your hobby, it's your free time. If that means you feel like writing 2000 words on Monday, awesome. By Wednesday, if you'd rather sit and play video games, that's cool; you don't need to write every single day. If you can only get 100 words down on a weeknight because you're tired or busy, hey, that's 100 more words than you had yesterday. It all adds up.

I was anxious about writing and sharing the ovi fic. I avoided putting those words down for months and months, just letting the scenario play out in my head instead. Eventually, I really just wanted to see it on paper, and I shared some of it with friends to get excited with people, and that encouraged me to keep going. For me, sometimes sharing and having others to get hyped with helps keep me going. Other times, I may write something completely for myself.

When irl stuff is stressing me out, I use writing as escapism. There are a lot of themes in my writing -- acceptance of people despite their flaws, working hard to be a good person despite setbacks, always getting up and trying again, fuck even just Hyrule being a med student -- that are directly related to my irl stressors. Sometimes I just put down fluff to make me happy. It doesn't have to all relate to a given plot. Hell, it doesn't even need to be the same AU. Just going with the flow at any given time helps me keep going.

There are other times when irl stressors are too great and I have to take a little break from writing, and that's okay too. I'm currently coming off of a weeks-long writing hiatus because health and work things were getting out of hand. And that's okay! You and I don't owe anyone anything. Don't let imagined deadlines or the audience of the internet make you crazy. We're legit just doing this for fun.

Do I ever think about giving up on writing? Yes and no. I have abandoned WIPs because I didn't like where they were going, or because I wasn't finding them fun anymore. Some days, words are hard and they just won't come. But in general, I always like writing and I don't consider giving up on it.

One thing I've learned is that you're not going to wake up every single day and want to be a ___, be that a writer, a doctor, a pilot, a car salesman. Some days you just aren't going to vibe with it, and that's fine. Sit with those feelings, let them come and go. Don't stress about them when they come up, because if it's something you really love, you'll always come back to it eventually.

Finally, don't measure your progress compared to anyone else - especially not to me!! I've written so much over the past few years because writing is my stress response. Truthfully, for a long time I was using it as an unhealthy coping mechanism. Everything in moderation.

I hope that helps, anon, and you can always reach out via the inbox with questions.

[palfriendpatine66]

What could you recommend to people who just started with writing fanfiction or wanting to write fanfiction?

I feel a little pretentious posting what amounts to your pal’s fanfic writing manifesto, but since it was prompted, here it is:

1. Write what makes you happy

Don’t worry what the rest of fandom says about a character or an event. It doesn’t need to be the same, that’s what makes fanfic fun is seeing everyone’s different takes. Let yourself tell the story you want to tell.

2. Write the way that makes you happy

Don’t post on a schedule if it stresses you out, OR give yourself a deadline if it motivates you. Do full outlines if you like having a plan OR let the story unfold as you go. Write a little every day if it makes things more manageable OR wait for that burst of inspiration and knock it all out in a fever dream before you forget it all. This is my long winded way of saying write the way that works for you, not the way you think you’re supposed to write. I promise someone will be there to read it when you’re done, no matter what.

3. Don’t limit yourself

Don’t be afraid to try new things. You’re not tied to one style or one trope or one ship. Not everything you write is going to be for everyone, and that’s ok. You’ll have new people discover new works. You’ll try out new things and find your voice along the way. It’s part of the journey. Enjoy it.

4. Read

This is always the writing advice right? But read. Read the source material and get to know your characters. Read other fanfics, discover what you like and don’t like. Read anything you like at all and even if you’re not consciously noticing things like pacing and breaks and style, there’s a part of you that’s keeping track of what works/doesn’t work, what’s right/doesn’t sound right and your own writing will only get stronger for it

5. Don’t let stats rule your life

(In which your pal is the world’s biggest hypocrite)

It is So!Tempting! to post and refresh every thirty seconds and wait for the comments and kudos to come in and see what everyone things (Hi, I’m the problem, it’s me). Try not to do this. I’ve started posting at times when I can’t do this - right before I have somewhere to go. Right before bed (ha! sometimes that works, sometimes that backfires).

Look. I get it. You wrote something and worked hard and poured yourself into it and worked up the nerve to share it and now you just want to know if everyone loves it the same way you do. I am literally the worst offender here. But. Try to remember that post that’s all like (paraphrasing): it’s tempting to look at each comment and be like: it’s only one. Only five. Only 17. 30. Whatever. But each and every one is a real person that was there and read your work and stopped to say Hey! I liked this. And when you’re looking at a number on a screen it doesn’t feel like a lot, but if every one of those was someone standing next to you in your living room or at your writing desk telling you they liked your work, it sure would seem like a lot.

Literally anything you write and put out there - someone’s life is better for it. And isn’t that worth it? 💕

[janiedean]

I know it's been a long time, but do you plan on writing Sandor's pov of the Heart Thing series? I'm poor, so I won't commission the fic, but I wanted to at least know how you think he'd deal with it (ex, would he hide and try to ignore it, would he try to be a better person, whisper almost-kind words to it when Sansa is sad?)

hey anon, first of all thank you so much for the kind words and please no need to commission anything like I'm just glad people still remember it T_T

that said with answers for both your questions:

yes I do plan on writing that but when it happens is... up in the air because meh like I'm trying to not sound whiny about it but if it wasn't clear from my less than stellar production lately my mental health has been completely down the drain lately and as it is rn I'm finding it extremely hard to put words together unless I have an extremely hard deadline and as it is I'm trying to finish a bunch of comms that I started but I'm like really struggling with liking anything that I write so tldr: yes but it could be three months from now and it could be next year, sure af I hope it's sooner rather than later because I really don't relish any of this but eh T_T

how he'd deal with having it: first time it happens (which would be after they get together which like.. he can't actually deny it's A Thing yknow she got his so) he thinks he someone went on a bender and forgot even if he tried to cut down on the drinking and then he's like oh god nope it's really here what the fuck and immediately gives it back to her like IM NOT WORTHY HERE, she's like yeah okay sure but I don't think it's gonna end here (she's fine with it), the second time he gets it is when she's sad for some reason and she's not nearby so he has to take care of it and actually worry about it and he's like god what do I do and just keeps it close and tries to not make anyone notice, then it happens again when something bad happens to her and she's not immediately nearby and as you said he tries to tell it something nice which for his standards would be weird but it actually works because she actually feels better and then she's all smug when she tells him and he's like wait what are you fucking kidding me

and she's like sure I'm not :DDDDDDDD

so pattern he always gets it when she's sad or down or has dealt with crappy people and so on and at some point he just embraces it like yknow what I denied it for ages but it makes no sense that I should now oKAY FINE I'M NOT UNWORTHY OF THAT

sansa is just :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD for the entire next month and robb's like did you just propose her or what NOT THAT I'D SAY NO AND NOT LIKE SHE DOESN'T WANT IT sandor is like maaaybe that's uh for another time MAYBE

he probably springs the maaaybe weee should make it official thing not long later tho

robb is just extremely happy of how he matchmade half of this union XD

ngl there were things I wanted to do in that verse including the throbb fic and sansa meeting brienne like you were my role model too but eh as stated at this point I'll be just glad if I manage to finish my commission backlog and/or literally anything that won't feel like crap after five lines so i can't guarantee it's happening at any point soon, sorry anon T_T

[autumatically]

what's the coolest thing that you did this year?

so normally i would direct people to send asks to my main blog, especially if they make for good writing prompts like this one. but as you just noted, i kind of already answered this question!

...in a professional capacity. i left out one important detail about Retrush that i'm incredibly proud of, and i want to touch on it here.

i kind of keep this on the down-low in professional settings due to the stigma around it, but most of y'all here know that i'm plural. and the truth is that i, 🤍 Autumn, have kind of taken center stage in our shared life. most of the others in my system have plans and dreams that go unrealized, as hard as it is for me to admit...

tomorrow a second post will go up that compares my accomplishments vs my resolutions. my resolutions for the year are a shared compromise between us in the system, as a way of saying "this is what will make all of us happy together."

the truth is that we fell quite short of our resolution, and i feel like i'm letting the rest of my system down...

but 🖤 Ghost is backing me up with a memory.

see, Ghost's plan for the year was to find us a new job and a new place to live. this is the "stronger foundations" in tomorrow's post that we're a little afraid of admitting on a professional blog where my coworkers could see it.

(they've commented to me personally on some of the things that i write, which i love, but i sometimes have to be wary of what i post. it's chill!)

Ghost's memory is: her plan was to find us a new job early in the year. but then, all of the news stories started to roll in about layoffs. and Ghost took one look at that and said:

"hey, Autumn, let's finish Retrush while we wait for this to blow over. you have my full support."

and we did! and she was a HUGE help in keeping me on track with the project, managing our soft deadlines and which nights we could work on it, as well as getting others to help with things we couldn't do alone – she came up with the idea of commissioning our partner to cover Last Wave and help us work on the pre-release trailers.

we've never been so coordinated as a system before! we've always stepped on each others' toes and scrambled over each other to get anything done. i still remember in 2018, when i wanted to do anything to relax, how i'd hear a nagging voice in my head telling me to work on my resume instead of resting, because we needed a job Right Now...

but this time there was no such thing, and i think it's one of the coolest things we've ever accomplished. we were a united force seeing Retrush through to the end, and i couldn't have done it without my Ghostie leading the charge. thank you ;-;

our new years resolution for 2024 is to start HRT finally, because that's what she wants and it's long past time to pursue. no more making half-baked, compromised resolutions – i want us to be a united force for all of our dreams!

[thebittercorvus]

Content warning: Death. Decay.

His best friend died two weeks ago. He saw it happen.

And he almost convinced himself, that he was having a nightmare.

"--y, and so I went to human resources to complain about Kassandra being a hostile, insufferable creep again but they said I needed to, hear me out, fucking walk it off, and isn't it a bitch that--"

Because you see, it was sudden.

Not that death gives you a warning in writing two weeks prior, stuck in your door like an eviction notice for delayed payments or whatever bullshit the landlord is on about now. Actually scratch that, he's not sure if that'd make things better or worse.

He's not sure if he would've liked to know his friend was going to die. But, saying goodbye one night after making plans to spend sunday watching a series they've been meaning to watch the entire year, just to see him slumped over his desk and without a pulse next morning...

You see, nobody tells you just how heavy ashes can be. Nobody tells you either that in the crematorium, those ovens rarely ever get deep cleaned. He's not sure whose ashes were mixed in that tiny urn he just knew it wasn't just his friend but some strangers' ashes too because there was no space in the local cemetery and who has money for the private cemetery two hours away from the city anyways.

His ashes rested in the river. Lucas dreamed of seeing the world, and that's the closes thing he could get him on a half-a-cent budget.

When he was alive, Lucas was stressed, overworked and underpaid, like most adults his age were. He had a lot on his plate, in the metaphorical sense only, because he hadn't been eating too well. The last time they saw each other, he was complaining about a weird pain in his arm, and a headache that wouldn't go away. Lucas always had a lot on his plate.

The funeral was two weeks ago. He was there. He was the one who scattered the ashes and he has alone for it. He managed to contact a relative who would identify the body, but they didn't stay long after it and they surely didn't want anything to do with funeral arrangements.

Lucas had been dead and gone for two weeks and he was about to write it off as the worst living, walking nightmare he's had in his entire thirty years.

Except, his friend clocked in the exact same hour as every day.

"Yo', Michael, are you listening to me?"

Even though he himself found him without a pulse, slumped over that tiny desk inside that cramped office.

Even though he vividly recalls having to deal with everything Lucas left behind on his own.

He didn't even had the time to process it all.

Yet there he was, walking around as if nothing had happened, looking exhausted yet still with a smile on his face, saying that he'd rest when dead like a cosmic joke at the expense of his sanity... Michael convinced himself that surely, the funeral, those endless days, everything, as unlikely as that might sound, was a horrible dream.

Even though he was the only one there to scatter the ashes.

"No, it's fine, I was listening to you," he said, feeling like he was going to cry all of a sudden. Like he didn't woke up one day to his friend being gone. It had been a nightmare. Surely it was a nightmare. A long, vivid one. "I'm-- I'm glad to see you."

Luke gave him a puzzled look. Most people would. It was a weird choice of words.

"Thank... you? I'm glad too?" he goes, rather awkwardly. "Man, are you alright?"

"Me?"

"Yeah? You look like you just saw a ghost."

He blinked the tears away, and if Lucas noticed something off, he was kind enough to let him be. He usually was.

"Hey, you-- remember that one project that's been keeping you awake at night?" He asks. If it was a nightmare, then Lucas was still working overtime to meet the project deadlines.

If it was all a dream then, on that day, two weeks ago, he last saw Lucas disappear inside his office to dream of never seeing him walk out alive again.

"Remember? Man, I couldn't forget about it if I lobotomized myself," he replies, rubbing his palms against his eyes. "C'mon now I have five minutes while the project manager reviews the damn thing and I'm trying to tell you how Kassandra is going to be the death of me--"

"Let's get out of here," he says all of a sudden.

Lucas stares at him like he's gone mad.

And maybe he did.

"Mike, dude, are you alright?"

"If I say no, will you come with me?"

"What? Seriously man, you're scaring me. Is everything alright? Did your... did your dad call or something?" he whispers the last part. "You need like. A interbrontion?"

"Stop trying to make interbrontion a thing, it's not gonna happen," he says out of pure reflex. "I'm fine," he lies, "I just... Y'know, you never know when shit's gonna happen. The project will still be there tomorrow. But, today? Today we might just see the cutest dog, and it might not be there tomorrow. Let's just see a movie. Walk downtown 'till three in the morning. Punch a nazi in the face. Let's be like, teens again, walking around the city."

"Dude, we grew up in suburbia."

"I'm not hearing a no!"

"... Man, I don't know, Johnson's been on my ass about finishing this damn thing," Lucas replies, a bit unsure about the whole thing. "What about I drop by your place after I finish this? I have a coupon for chinese takeaway that hasn't expired yet..." A non expired coupon from this man? Unbelievable. "I think." Hah, there it is.

"Y'know, never have I seen Johnson leave a second after four o'clock, while you pull all-nighters eight days a week," he insists, crossing his arms across his chest. In his dream, Johnson denied him paid leave in order to take care of his friend's fucking funeral. He's still pissed about it, and it's also a thing real-Johnson would do. "If he's got a problem he can go ahead and try and fire you."

"You know I can't really afford to be unemployed right now... And I mean, we're all pretty replaceable in life in general--"

"Not to me," he interrupts. "You're. Definitely not replaceable. Not to me."

Man that dream got me fucked up, alright.

"... Seriously man, are you alright?"

... But it had been so real.

***

It took some convincing and a little bit of crying, but in the end he convinced Lucas to leave. He doesn't usually cry, only when in the middle of a mental breakdown or right after eating a really, really good soup, none of which he's had in a while. Maybe they should eat soup, he's sure he can get away with shoplifting two cans of soup still. Who's gonna catch him, the soup police?

So they go see a movie. The tickets are unnecesarily expensive-- for a man that just shoplifted soup-- and the popcorn tastes like cardboard and the movie itself sucks so much they end up dubbing it over with an immensely funnier version in whispers.

They uh, got kicked out of the theater for that one. Even though the place was near empty on accounts of it being a monday.

After that he insists on walking, even though the place he lives is on the other side of town, and Lucas agrees because he's a saint of a man that worries too much for his neurotic friend to say no. They do see plenty of cute dogs willing to get their ears scratched, and plenty of equally cute cats who were not so willing to get their ears scratched.

And it was... Nice.

Maybe that dream was trying to tell him something. Like, appreciate more the friends you've got. Specially the ones that try and make words like interbrontion happen.

"Mike, whatever it is... You know I'm not going anywhere, right? You know that. You have to know that," Lucas insists, after they reach the dead-end alley where the narrow steps of his apartment complex is located.

Michael shrugs. "Dunno. You can't take things for granted."

"Whatever it is, you can tell me, y'know?"

"It's alright, it was..." A very vivid nightmare? In which you died of a heart attack and I was left alone to take care of everything, but it's okay now because you're most definitely not dead. I'm sure someone on the human resources department would've noticed a dead man walking, they don't want to have to pay more people than they absolutely are obligated to. "Uh, my dad did call," he lies instead. "He um, wanted me to lend him some money again." Yeah no way in hell I'm explaining that one.

He sees his friends face go red in a blink.

"THAT MOTHERFUCKER!" He shouts. "I KNEW IT! That ASSHOLE! That's it! I'm getting a fucking plane ticket to Bumfuck No-fucking-where to set his motherfucking SUV on FIRE! Give me his number he's going to hear of me again."

Have you ever had prophetic dreams?

"C'mon now relax, he didn't even say anything--"

"I'm going to murder that backstabbing miserable attempt of a man, I don't give a shit if he calls me the wrong thing he's going to fucking meet Lucas and my fists will meet his fucking sad pathetic fac--"

Or perhaps, a dream so, so likely that when it ends up occurring in real life, you can't help the deja-vú.

Perhaps that had been death, sticking the eviction notice to the wrong door.

"Lucas?" He begins, seeing him get paler by the second. It's only now that he notices, the way his breath comes in short. Like he just ran a marathon, even though they were walking just fine a few minutes ago. They were just talking a second ago. "Lucas!"

"No, no, I just need to-- need to sit down, fuck--"

It happens in slow motion.

It happens in a split of a second.

It happens slowly, suddenly, all at once.

"No, no, nonononononono, wake up, wake up!" he cries once his friend collapses. He never learnt how to properly reanimate anybody. He doesn't know how to do chest compressions, nor has the strenght to keep a heart beating. He's regretting not learning it. "HELP! SOMEBODY HELP ME!"

Through blurred eyes he sees his friend take a breath and then, it stops. His head is spinning.

This can't be real. This can't be real. This can't be-

***

"--Really, and so I went to human resources to complain about Kassandra being a hostile, insufferable creep again but they said I needed to, hear me out, fucking walk it off, and isn't it a bitch that--"

He startled awake, suddenly back inside his cubicle while everyone else worked. Lucas had walked in, in the middle of a short break while his project was being reviewed.

He's fairly certain, he just had lived through this morning for the third time.

"What day is it?" He asks abruptly, because this just can't be.

Lucas stops mid-sentence, and looks at him, extremely confused. "... Uh, monday?"

There's no way.

"But it can't be monday," he says, getting up immediately. Nobody in the entire floor seem to even care about the sudden raise of his voice. Now that he thinks about it, last time nobody even gave a fuck that they walked out. Usually he can't even go to the bathroom more than twice or some manager somehow finds out.

"Well, it oftentimes comes riiiight after a sunday, unless I missed the latest update," Lucas replies with an easygoing smile. "Are you alright?"

No. "Yes?" Definitely maybe. "I just. I need to see something."

He starts running then, and takes notice of just how nobody seems to give a crap about it. Usually they're sligthly more attentive to the world around their cubicles, at least just enough to catch some gossip, like Michael from the third floor making a run to the fire exit like a madman.

And then he's outside, and the world stares back. The kiosk in the corner has newspapers, and they're all dated to a monday. The news channel reads monday. The vietnamese restaurant across the street has a special offer for mondays and the coffee shop right besides it has a handmade chalk sign that reads "Marvelous Mondays!"

And he's seen enough movies to know exactly what's wrong.

"-ke, MIKE!" He finally hears the shouting coming from behind him. "THERE YOU ARE YOU ABSOLUTE IDIOT! WHAT IN THE ACTUAL--"

"We're repeating the day of your death, and you're going to die today at around eleven of a heart attack," he says quickly, because he hasn't learned enough from those movies. He hates them, as a matter of fact.

"... Hey did you read my search history or something to prank me, that's not cool dude," he replies instead. "But thanks for reminding me I have to update my passwords."

"Coolio69420 has been your password since we were fucking twelve anyways-- wait a minute, search history?" Lucas at the very least has the decency to look away. "YOU KNOW YOU'RE HAVING SYMPTOMS YOU IDIOT!"

"Yeah, well, I don't have hospital money."

"And I don't have funeral money!" He goes off, angry and relieved, and grabs him by the arm to drag him to the nearest emergency room. "C'mon! We're splitting the bill, I'm taking out a loan, whatever!"

"Dude this is not a dinner--"

"I don't give a shit if I go bankrupt, I'm not seeing you die for the third time!"

And he's not entirely sure how or why, but Lucas, stubborn asshole he's always been, agrees to it.

***

They save him, although it was a close call, and he gets to have a headache about the bill on the way home with his very much alive friend walking besides him.

"That was scary, you say you kept having dreams about me dying?" Lucas asks in between sips of water. "That's horror story levels of creepy."

"Yeah, well, but it worked and now you're alive."

"And you're bankrupt."

"But you're alive," he insists, like nothing else could matter in the world. Nothing does, as a matter of fact.

"... Dude that's kinda gay."

He punches him in the arm. Ligthly. "Friends don't let friends die of prophetized heart failures!"

"That's a brand new sentence," Lucas laughs.

The light at the crosswalk turns green. It's a bit of a long way home but for the life of him, he can't remember where he parked his bike and he's fairly certain he left his wallet in his desk. He wants to have faith but he know of an asshole or two that will undoubtelly just take whatever little money he's got left.

"Hey, you said the dreams were super realistic, right?" He hears Lucas ask besides him. They're still crossing. It feels like the crosswalk was...

Weirdly infinite.

"Yeah, why?"

He hears Lucas stop besides him. Which is weird, in the middle of a busy crosswalk, with cars and people around them. Usually the city is extremely noisy.

When he looks back, Lucas simply is standing. Somehow, he's in the middle of the street, while he's on the other sidewalk waiting.

"Lucas?"

"Say, Mike," he hears him say, like a whisper from somewhere beyond. "You'd know, if this were a dream, right?"

For a moment, it feels as if the world stills for a second.

Then he blinks, and it's over. There's music coming out of a cornershop, and a group of girls are trying to record a dance video in front of a flower shop. The cars are honking impatiently at the stoplights that are taking way too long to turn green again.

Michael smiles at him, extending his hand so his friend will just hurry up and meet him on the other side.

"I'm sure I would've noticed by now," he replies.

Lucas lets out a sigh, relaxing visibly, and continues walking.

The light turns green.

***

"--She doesn't need to hide behind religion to be a phobic piece of shit, really, and so I went to human resources to complain about Kassandra being a hostile, insufferable creep again but they said I needed to, hear me out, fucking walk it off, and isn't it a bitch that--"

He gets up so fast, the chair falls to the ground. The sound echoes in the otherwise silent office, and nobody even looks up from their computers to ask him to kindly shut the hell up.

"It's monday," he says, stricken by horror.

"... Yeah?" Lucas replies, looking more and more concerned by the second. "Mike?"

This can't be, he thinks desperately, making a run to the stairs. The elevator's been broken since the last week and only now they're trying to fix it. Many people has complained about accesibility issues, and the only thing the company offered was a work from home option for them while the elevator was being repaired. There were notices everywhere that the repairs would be done on monday and when he walks by it, sure there are they working on it.

But he doesn't dwell in there.

Instead he runs to the fifth floor, to an office he's got a key of even though he absolutely should not, but does anyways because Lucas more often than not forgets about his, and walks by a couple of people that should, by all means, wonder what the hell is some dude from the third floor doing in there uninvited.

He was so happy about seeing his friend again, that he didn't notice just how... irresponsive the rest of the world became.

The door is jammed. It usually is, that's not a big revelation. They've complained a lot to get it fixed and yet the best they could give Lucas was some oil to mantain it himself. He's since then told everyone that it was a fire hazard and the department simply told him to work with his door open if it bothered him that much. He's been meaning to buy a new lock himself for months now.

Then his friend died, and it didn't matter that much anymore.

And when the door finally opens...

"No, no, this can't be, I just saw you. You were-- you were just talking with me, you're fine!"

Just to find a decaying corpse, slumped over a desk.

"Wake up!" He cries, even though there's maggots eating off his flesh and flies everywhere. It's impressive nobody had issued a complaint for the smell. "Wake up! Wake up!"

"Lucas?"

And then he turns around. And sees...

Himself.

From two weeks ago, when he first found him. In that dream... Or, what he thought had been one anyways.

"Hey, I've told you not to sleep in here how many times now?" He hears himself saying, like in that first dream. He steps aside, and sees a spitting image of himself, another Michael, walk closer to a corpse that now looks fresh instead of decaying. Almost alive. "C'mon now, I brought you breakfast. Lucas. Hey, Lucas!"

It all plays out exactly like the first time.

"Dude stop this, it's not funny," he hears his own voice waver again. He sees himself walk closer. Closer. And put a hand on his friend's shoulder.

He sees again, the body fall off and roll over.

Dead. Dead. Dead.

"HELP!" He hears himself say, for what feels like the millionth time now. "SOMEBODY CALL AN AMBULANCE! SOMEBODY HELP ME!"

"Have you learned your lesson yet?"

The world around him disappears, as soon as he turns around.

There's only himself and the fresh corpse of his friend and, across the void, something that looks like Lucas, walks like Lucas, know things only Lucas would know.

But isn't. His. Friend.

"Who are you?" He asks. "Why are you doing this to me!?"

It smiles at him. The smile resembles his friend too, but only on surface level. There's a glimpse of red in its eyes, that he never noticed before.

"I recall you saying, as you scattered his ashes on that smelly river, that you'd trade your soul just to have him back for a day," the thing says. "Perhaps you should be careful when you speak with a dead man's ashes on your hands, who knows what wicked things are listening."

"Take me back to my world," he cries, kneeling still next to his dead friend. Just like he remembered him. "I can't see-- I don't want to keep having to see him die. This is not what I meant. I wanted him alive again, not-- not having to see him die every day for the rest of eternity!"

"See, that's why you usually word your wishes more carefully my man," the thing says, reappearing by his side.

Up close, it doesn't look nothing like Lucas. Just like a walking corpse, wearing the skin of a man he knew like the back of his hand.

"I don't want this wish," Michael repeats. "I-- I have pets, that I need to take care of, my tortoise. I need to go back."

"Sorry, no refunds," the wicked thing says, smiling with far too many teeth.

"Then I want to change my wish."

"Aw, but I don't think I can do that you see, it's a soul we're speaking of. Valuable things. I sell them, I know what I'm telling you," it says. "But go ahead, let's see what can I do for you."

Michael swallows dry.

He had to try, at the very least.

"My place for his," he says, and the thing's eyes seem to shine brigther. "I-- I will take his place. Just. One last day is what I'm asking you. Let him live, and take me instead."

The thing smiles. It's almost kind, so much that for a moment, he convinces himself it's his friend smiling to him again.

"Did he ever knew?" It asks him.

"... What?"

"Oh, nevermind, I don't think you're even aware of it yourself," it says, getting up and walking away. "A shame. Anyways."

"Wait!"

"One day is all you're getting my dear, pathetic friend," he hears the thing say. "Others have traded their souls for money and youth. Wisdom. Power."

"I just..." he begins, unable to explain himself to the thing across him. It smiles back, knowingly. "I didn't even got to say goodbye."

"Oh, don't you worry," it says, and the world begins to fade in front of his eyes.

"You better wake up, it'll be late for work."

***

He's not entirely sure yet why he left himself be convinced by Michael to just leave work early and go walk around, but he still did it and the thirty messages on his phone from Johnson are there to remind him it's not always the best idea to let Michael have his way all the time.

Should've told him no. But by god, that dog we saw on the way home was so cute.

He was just looking at the picture the dog owner took of the two of them-- a very kind lady that really tried her best to give her number to Mike, just to have the endearingly, annoyingly oblivious man talk about the dog nonstop for ten minutes. He was also adamant that the two of them appeared in the picture with the dog, even though Lucas' never liked pictures.

But these turned out alright. He might just misuse the office supplies to print them.

"I completely forgot to tell you yesterday, you were in such a hurry, remember Kassandra right?" he says, walking inside the office Mike works in, just to find his cubicle empty. "Huh."

"He didn't arrive today," he heard Hera say, the person working just opposide of Mike's desk. "No notice, no anything."

"That's weird, I saw him yesterday," Lucas says, and they just shrug.

"Hangover?" Hera asks.

"He's on recovery," Lucas shoots back, almost offended.

"Sorry, had no clue. He never talks about his personal life," they say. "Try to call him, but I've been trying all morning and it just rings."

"That's 'cause he keeps his phone on silence," he mutters to himself, but still grabs his phone to give it a try.

He sees the contact. It reads that last time he was online was just this morning.

The last message he received from him was just a short goodnight, after Lucas sent him the dog pictures.

... He can't seem to shake off the bad feeling.

And, almost on cue, his phone starts ringing.

"Should've tried to find you sooner, I knew he would reply to you," Hera says, a bit teasing. "I mean I also pick up when my friends call me--"

"It's not him," he says, afraid, reading the name on the caller id.

They look up at last.

"It's his landlord."

***

He couldn't get there fast enough.

They found him on the bathroom floor.

"This has to be a joke," he says, looking at the body hidden under a white sheet. "You-- I saw you yesterday. Get up man, this isn't funny."

"Sir, we need a family member or a spouse to identify the body," he hears someone say.

"Well there's only me, is that not good enough?" He snaps back.

"Are you a spouse?"

"No."

"Sibling? Cousin?"

"He's the boyfriend," he hears the old landlord say.

"We're just friends," Lucas insists.

The man in front of him gives him a look.

"Listen, it might be easier to handle the paperwork if you say you're the boyfriend," he explains. "Not that it will be any easy. Are you sure there are no living relatives? We couldn't get a hold of anybody."

He remembers an old white man with his unkept beard and red hat and unnecesarily enormous SUV and the belt he would always carry around like a whip and use as such more often than not.

"There's nobody but me," he replies, resolute.

The man doesn't look convinced, but doesn't press either. "Alright then. I'll give you a form, make sure to explain you're the boyfriend--"

"We're not--!"

"--'cause if you don't young man, the hospital will just keep his body for research, and I don't know 'bout your or his beliefs but unless he specifically asked for it to be this way, that's not a way to go."

Then he's left in an empty room, with a nervous tortoise walking around and a form to fill.

He saw Mike, just the day before.

"For fucks sake."

He needs a walk.

***

There's way too many people by the river for him to yell. He joked often, that if he were to day, Mike should just scatter his ashes there and see where the wind takes him. He's always wanted to see the world, but never had the money for anything more than a trip to the bay two hours away every other summer.

He took Shelly with him, because now the tortoise would have to live with him and his cat. Mike would do the same if something were to happen to him.

His friend is dead.

His friend is... dead.

"God dammit," he whispers, and sits just behind the railing, trying not to cry and failing to do so.

He's not sure how long it took or just how many people walked by. He can't be the only person in this god forsaken city who just got the worst news of his entire life.

... He didn't even got to say goodbye.

"Life's cruel, ain't it?" He hears someone besides him say.

When he looks up, a woman is smoking besides him. She looks at the river, and blows out the smoke. A gust of wind takes it away.

"Want one?" She offers.

"I hate that brand," Lucas replies.

"More for me then."

He keeps sobbing for a while longer, while the woman goes through her entire pack. And then, opens a new one.

"What would you do, just for a chance to see a loved one, just one more time?" He asks after a moment.

"Don't got one of those," she replies. "But I'd do just about anything to scratch my dog's ears one last time."

"What happened to them?"

"Got ran over by a car."

"Sorry," he says.

"'s fine."

There's more silence after that.

"Right now, I'd just sell my soul," he mutters. The woman stares. "If such things exist."

"Oh, they do. I've heard they're expensive, even," she says.

"Expensive enough to bring a man back to life?" He jokes.

She grins at him.

And, maybe it was just a car passing by, an illusion created by the traffic and his own exhausted mind.

He could've sworn, her eyes just flashed red.

"I'm sure I can work out a deal for you, dear Lucas."

Your friend always said “I’ll rest when I’m dead,” so much that it became his catchphrase. He says it again today when he came into work, going about his daily routine. This normally wouldn’t be concerning, if not for the fact that you attended his funeral two weeks ago.

[ocqueen]

CW detailed discussion of weight loss/gain, chronic health, and disordered eating

Normally I'd post this type of stuff on my journal blog never to be seen again, but hey. I'm feeling bold and weirdly okay about people I know reading this, and it might be insightful for some other people, too.

A long rambling story about weight and physical/mental health, chronic illness, changing bodies, and roads to recovery

I've just hit a really significant physical milestone for me where I can see myself gaining weight. I don't keep a scale (my mom didn't allow them in the house growing up and I never got one for myself), so I don't know if it's backed up by numbers, but it's enough to where I'm actually filling out my bras, developing a stomach and an ass, can't feel my sharp hip bones or ribs jutting out anymore. It's... weird. I finally get people's insecurities about NOT being twiggy thin like I used to be, can feel those thoughts creeping in already even as a still very thin person every time I struggle to get my new butt into my old size 0 pants, but at the same time there's something a bit joyful about being able to see a body that's taking up more space and changing with my age and what that means about my personal health and recovery in general.

I've been stick thin ever since I was a kid, and as I went through college it was very clear that I wasn't going to get a 'freshman fifteen' - and then just about the same time equally as clear that the reason for that was because I was very chronically ill, violently depressed, and stressed out of my mind in a high-pressure program, all of which meant I had a low appetite and lost a lot of weight. The fabled 'freshman fifteen' was actually there, just keeping me at a baseline thin instead of dropping me off a cliff into more dangerously underweight. Even with it, I was starting to have attacks of hypothermia from lack of fat to keep myself warm, and had to start dressing in heavy layers - something my GP originally couldn't explain.

I've struggled since my diagnoses with managing my health, and a lot with gaining - and keeping - weight. I'd go through periods of weight gain as my conditions were in remission or I better managed my stress levels, only to have a health flare or a bout of deadlines and anxieties and lose it all again. I've barely ever managed to hit my goal weight, and when I did it was probably only for about two weeks. I live in constant fear of falling below 100 pounds again now that I finally managed to get myself over it, to the point where I refused to exercise at all and risk accidentally losing more of what little weight I had, despite it being bad for other areas of my health and well being.

I also tend towards disordered eating since I was a teen, especially once I lost the structures of school, and hate having to feed myself - cooking feels like a drudgery and a chore, and eating out was too expensive and wasteful, so I often forgot or forewent it intentionally - something I did more often in school and during my stints working in television. Eating got put to the wayside, in favor of 'productive tasks' and 'saving money' (as if eating to fuel your body wasn't productive enough). I got headaches, shakes, fatigue, all from not eating enough, and it got bad enough that eventually I got an app specifically to track my calories, which revealed how horrible I've been with fueling my body or eating enough to maintain weight. I tried to change, force myself to eat, and for a time it worked, but I always ended up forgetting and falling back onto old habits.

Now, years later, I've adapted. I eat three meals a day because I have a new job with a time structure, I've learned to intentionally eat more calorie-dense foods to make up for eating less, and I snack when I remember to and keep fruit and packaged snacks around that are easy to grab. I've taught myself to be okay eating takeout if I don't have the energy to cook and I exercise doing strength training and yoga to gain muscle without losing weight (though my current job is quite sedentary and I should probably be doing more cardio, haha). Many of my health conditions are getting better with managed treatment, even while others might worsen, and the main culprits for my medical weight loss have slowly been brought to heel and monitored closely. I'm even on a few meds with a side effect of weight gain, which has helped out, too.

And with all of that together... I think we've finally moved past maintenance. I looked in the mirror the other day and I had a real, true stomach, and smooth bumps at my hips instead of jutting bone, and while it caught me off guard I'm slowly coming to enjoy it instead of fear it. My waist isn't so wasp-thin anymore, filled out by fat or muscle, and it's unclear which but I don't care right now. My face is less gaunt, I look less tired (my mom tells me how much better I look), I'm getting fewer unexplained bouts of hypothermia and I know where my late afternoon headaches are from and can make sure they don't happen anymore. It's surreal to me, like I'm a different person, and while it's a lot of work to manageI know that it's healthier this way. My doctors are now worried about me gaining too MUCH weight, but I'm just happy to settle into a new body for a bit - one that might be able to help carry me wherever I need to go, and one I might be able to treat a bit better in the future if I make sure I don't forget it. It's part of my recovery, not only with my physical health, but a sign of moving past and managing my fast-inducing depression and anxiety, too, and that alone is enough to make me happier than I could have thought a little bit of fat could do.

Anyways, recovery looks a lot of different ways for a lot of different people, but this is mine, and it's something I've been thinking about a lot lately as I go through chronic health flares and scares related to other things. It's a small victory for me that I hope can usher in a few larger ones in the future, and pave the way for something more.

[kcisnallagandla2023]

Explore Curriculum | Kidzonia Credence International School nallagandla

Habits of Highly Successful Students

I have had the privilege of working with countless students who have achieved great success, academically and otherwise. In my experience, I've noticed some common habits among these high achievers that set them apart. Today, I want to share with you the top ten habits of successful students. But don't worry, I promise to throw in some humor and share an anecdote or two from my own journey!

Embrace curiosity:

Highly successful students have an insatiable curiosity. They ask questions, seek knowledge beyond the curriculum and learn with genuine enthusiasm. Remember, curiosity killed the cat, but it can never hurt a student!

Stay organized

A clean workspace and a well-managed schedule can do wonders. Successful students keep track of assignments, deadlines, and important materials. I've seen students carry backpacks that resemble black holes, but trust me, a little organization goes a long way!

Develop Time Management Skills:

Effective time management is the secret sauce. Successful students prioritize tasks, create realistic schedules, and avoid procrastination. They understand that Netflix will still be there when the job is done.

Develop Effective Study Habits

Highly successful students not only study harder, they study harder. They learn smarter. They find study techniques that work for them, break down complex concepts, and review them regularly. Yes, cramming the night before an exam rarely yields good results.

Ask for help and collaborate: No student is an island. Highly successful students actively seek help when they need it, whether it's from teachers, classmates, or online resources. Remember, asking for help doesn’t make you weak; It makes you wise.

See failure as a learning opportunity:

Mistakes are stepping stones to success. Highly successful students are not afraid of failure; they see it as an opportunity to grow and learn. After all, the road to success is often paved with a few failed math tests.

Stay motivated:

Staying motivated isn't always easy, but successful students find ways to stay motivated. They set goals, celebrate milestones, and remind themselves of their goals. Hey, sometimes a cheesy motivational quote can do wonders!

Active participation in class: Successful students actively participate in class discussions, ask thought-provoking questions, and contribute to group activities. Remember, sitting back and perfecting your doodling skills won't get you very far.

Stay Positive:

Attitude is everything. Successful students maintain a positive attitude, believe in their abilities, and approach challenges with optimism. So, keep your heads up, my friends, and keep your eyes on the prize!

Kidzonia is one of the top international schools and gives pupils a top-notch education. From preschool through grade 5, we provide a globally renowned Cambridge curriculum.

One of the top international schools is Kidzonia, which follows the CBSE and Cambridge curriculums. Admissions are open for 2023–24. A warm welcome to the Kidzonia International School, a highly progressive school that will provide quality education.

At Kidzonia Credence International School, we prepare our students for life by using the Cambridge International Curriculum, which is the world standard for international education.

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[0thsense]

8/8/2023

It's my birthday tomorrow. Everybody has left the south bay now. Martin, Reggie, Alex are all gone. I guess Steve is still here but he doesn't really hang out with us, or rather me anymore. I don't really know what to type here, as I haven't been thinking too intensely about too many things. The times when I'm doing worse are the times I'm more intensely in thought, so I guess I fail at thinking positively.

Anyways, I'll be 28 American years old tomorrow. My 27th year was better than my 26th year I guess. Definitely still in my bottom 5 years overall but hey its the first upward year in a long time. Maybe since college. I've managed to keep up gym and I've even started running which is slightly surprising. It's good because who knows what may have happened if I wasn't able to keep up gym. I'm planning to run my first 5 miler tomorrow. I have to wake up in the morning because I'll be eating with my family in the evening up in SF, mostly out of a feeling of obligation. I wonder if they know. I'm letting the fact that I'm not being lazy on my birthday feel symbolic.

One thing I've been telling myself is that I'm god's strongest soldier. Obviously that's not actually true, but motivationally it helps. It's one of those things that there's no harm in believing in the moment, and it brings me joy. Speaking of another thing that brings me joy, Lily and I agreed to go climbing sometime soon. She's willing to come down from SF for me, and seems genuinely interested in hanging out with me. I need to keep my mindset that I'm just trying to be there for her, though it seems I overestimated how depressed she was. Well, better safe than sorry.

I visited Yan a couple weeks ago along with Gerald. It was a spur of the moment thing, and the flight was expensive as a result. I honestly felt a little pressured into going. We did a lot of activities involving physical exertion and also hung out with his church buddies a lot. Yan is super into the culture there it seems. His lifestyle as a chad in NC honestly bothered me a little bit. He has more pride and ego than I remember and also some strong ideals about what it means to be a man, which I don't really agree with. I may be making judgments too hastily but I was disappointed at his treatment of Jeremy, a dude in his small group who seemed a little autistic. I wasn't able to express this to him. At the same time I'm glad he's obviously doing well for himself out there. According to society, I probably have no authority to judge someone who's found a lifestyle that works for them.

My next step should almost certainly be to make my sleep schedule really consistent. I'd like to sleep at 1-2am every day. The deadline for working on the game is fast approaching. I have less than 4 months left, and I've told too many people about the new york deadline. Sigh... I certainly have some mental block about coding. When I open the IDE my mood instantly sinks. I had the strange idea of treating coding like working out, doing reps of opening the IDE lmao.

Wow I thought this post would be short because I didn't feel like I had much to write about but here we are. I went to Ralph's wedding last weekend. It made me realize I've made a mistake, choosing the jolly group over Ralph's group. I just respect Ralph's close circle so much more these days than the people in jolly. They are more considerate and more secure, and jolly isn't even dank anymore. At the end of the day jolly has now devolved into a bunch of individuals who are either troubled or successful but unkind people. Obviously this is a bit of a generalization. Maybe I wasn't good enough to join Ralph's group anyways, or maybe the grass is always greener on the other side. I might as well try though, since jolly in the south bay is pretty much dead.

Finally there's the issue of getting more involved with Austin's church. Unfortunately my experiences visiting Yan have turned me off even more from Christianity, but I really haven't given Austin's church a fair chance. The demographics are obviously very different so maybe it'll be a better fit, though so far my instinct tells me it's only a small chance. It'll give me something to do I guess.

[sirladysketch]

Freelancing for a few years taught me a few tricks on how to manage this “hop to the new shiny thing” modus operandi since sometimes you really *do* need to keep working on that assignment that’s due tomorrow, despite the shiny new project being more exciting and stimulating. (Below the cut for length)

For me, I give myself between 5-10 minutes to examine the new assignment. Depending on the complexity I might allow myself 30 minutes or so, but absolutely no more than an hour. The goal of this new project pondering is to get a sense of what it is, what it will probably entail, and how long it will take you.

If you can’t get a sense of those three questions from the initial email/ assignment, use your pondering period to come up with questions about the project and then yeet a reply email with said questions. The ball is no longer in your court and while the new project might still be super shiny and attractive, you need more info before you can actively work on it.

That said, if it’s something like “hey, there’s a typo in this document, can you fix it” -- something that will literally take under 10 minutes, go ahead and do it, send your reply with the completed project, and then you’re free to get back to what you were doing. It’s a matter of gauging your time, your focus, and your deadlines. If doing the shiny new thing will not adversely affect the first thing you were doing, let yourself play with the shiny new project.

It’s more difficult when clients randomly call you-- ESPECIALLY irritating if you’re in the flow and they interrupt you mid-thought. There are two routes you can take when this happens:

Thank them for their call, tell them you’re just finishing something up, and ask if you can give them a call back. This gives you time to try to finish the thought you were working on in project A before you let yourself get distracted on shiny new project B.

If they absolutely must talk right now, politely tell them that you have a few minutes to talk, but you have a call/meeting/a previous engagement that you will need to take care of after a set amount of time. I generally found that telling people I had something at X:00 or X:30 gave you a set time frame for the call duration, during which time you can get whatever notes you need for project B. Once the call is done, you can send a follow-up email to confirm what was discussed, then get back to Project A.

I also find that it helps to have a physical desk calendar and/or to-do list. One, writing things down helps me remember things, and two, there is no feeling more satisfying than striking through a completed task. If you can chunk your projects/tasks into sub-tasks, that makes it easier to find more natural rest points in the project-- points where you can better switch gears to look at the new project without too much detriment to the first.

IDK if this is helpful at all, I just know that I’ve struggled my whole life with staying organized and on top of things, but between freelancing and modding 7 zines simultaneously (NEVER AGAIN) I found that this method worked for me.

Good luck, friends! <3

Listen, if you interrupt me with a new task while I’m midway through another, you aren’t allowed to be mad when I switch to the new task immediately. You clearly thought the new task was important enough to interrupt me with it!

I am just a little pikmin! You’re the one with the whistle!!

[boyancient]

excuse the desperate self indulgent self pity in the tags